All Fantasy Everything - Movie Deaths (w/ Jerry Ferrara, David Gborie, Sean Jordan)
Episode Date: December 15, 2022This week we went to a topic that's honestly shocking we haven't done yet. We're drafting "Movie Deaths!" and joining us WE HAVE JERRY FERRARA! Absolutely huge get for the GVG. Enjoy!  BO...STON! We're recording a live podcast in your city tonight! Get tickets at linktr.ee/allfantasyeverything.  Guest: Jerry Ferrara @jerryferrara IG: @jerryferrara Podcasts: Unleashed, Bad 4 Business  Support the show! Join the All Fantasy Everything Patreon for ad-free episodes, mailbags, and video pre-rolls. Check it all out at www.patreon.com/AllFantasy.  Follow the Good Vibes Gang on social media: Ian Karmel @IanKarmel IG: @IanKarmel Sean Jordan @SeanSJordan IG: @SeancougarmelonJordan David Gborie IG: @Coolguyjokes87 Mars Mel @MarsMel IG: @Mars.Mel Show Email: allfantasypodcast@gmail.com  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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This is a HeadGum Podcast.
This is all Fantasy Everything,
the podcast where we fantasy draft anything and everything
from the world of pop culture.
On today's episode, we're drafting movie deaths.
We are so thrilled about our guest today.
He's an actor, a producer, a proud,
I'm going to say lifelong from here going forward,
resident of Cleveland,
Ohio.
You know him from his work, says power, think like a man, an entourage.
He hosts the podcasts Unleashed and Bad for Business.
It's Jerry Ferreira.
I'm your host, Ian Carmel, and joining me as always are my friends and comedians, Sean
Jordan and David Borey.
Let's get into it.
Welcome to another brand new episode of All Fantasy Everything, the that uh decided to skip skate them out day i didn't skip it man i went it just uh you went i drove by yeah i went i was
going to go but you didn't go that doesn't count you didn't drive by it was i didn't go to disneyland
if i was like drove on the past anaheim i drove by you were there all right i was going to line was around the block and it was
ages 15 to mortgage you know like everybody there you have a mortgage i'm saying i was
i might have been up there with like the oldest person in line or i wasn't in line but i was going
to it just didn't move and then i saw a of kids cut and then I saw some almost what I
imagined turned into fights after I left,
but I saw the budding fights and it was just like,
I don't know,
man,
wasn't worth it.
I had to pick up Max from daycare in two and a half hours.
So I had a,
I had a time I had to be out and I just didn't,
I didn't feel like doing it.
Harder to justify waiting in line for sneakers when you have a baby at
home.
And the internet. I mean, I'm going to get them.
It's whether they cost two grand or 65 bucks.
So I was trying to do this for her.
This is for my
wild man. That's a different
that's a different
I guess priority list
that I had at one point,
but now I just can't. Is there part of you that's
happy knowing that many people can skate in Portland?
I don't know if everybody in that line,
I bet you 10% could do a trick on a skateboard.
There were long boards, there were penny boards,
there were boards that people pulled out of their garage, I think.
See, this is you being an elitist.
This is a bad look for you, man.
Yeah, this is finally.
Let's get the real Sean Jordan.
You had to skate out of the store was
the whole thing so you had to get the shoes dirty right out the gate so that so they couldn't be like
untouched you know i'd have been in there on a roller blade with an oar just pushing myself out
with the dunk i don't quite understand it sounds ridiculous it's not a scam it's a charity event i
think where they were ebay got together with n Nike and they were going to sell dunks for a sticker price for $65 a pair like they should be.
But the catch is you had to wear them out of the store.
And supposedly you had to skate them out on a board, but it was pouring rain.
So I think you had to have them on your feet.
But then kids would run to the street, wipe them off, and then sell them in line.
That happened a few times.
They'd just go down the line and sell them.
And it's like the bad luck.
That's what I mean.
Resale is fucked up sneakers.
Go back to shooting people for sneakers.
I think we got to bring it back.
I got three things on this.
One, it's crazy that sneakers have a sticker price
like it's a fucking Ford Explorer.
Right.
You got to ask the guy, come on, what's the real price?
How much am i walking out
here two when you have a kid every minute that goes by you're like oh i only got an hour and a
half left of like whatever i want time so that clock stretches out and three the thought of
squaring up for somebody at this age on the line to fight i'm maybe 20 years ago i would have been
like yeah fuck that guy up and i got the shoes but not today
not no not anymore absolutely not these shoes would have to come with like a bonus for my 401k
in order for me to get in a fight for them well the only and they weren't even specific shoes it
was just whatever they had so it was just they had a bunch of dunks but then you find out they
don't they only got 150 pairs but they said open to the public two-day event dog
obviously obviously more than 150 kids are going to show up and then i think about
now that i'm older what frustrates me and what i get mad about was the cutting that's where i
would have got that's where i would have thrown the hands if somebody's your father yeah every
minute that goes by i'm like what if someone cut in front of max at daycare what am i how am i
going to handle that there'd be so much manners related stress for you it wouldn't be worth it
yeah anyway it was a whole it was a whole thing i'm not an inline type of guy for anything
you're not i won't wait for a sandwich i'm not waiting in your fucking life i'm already out here
in the world i gotta wait in your line no i'll wait for a sandwich i just want to say david
doesn't speak for all of us if you got a sandwich if you got a sandwich with a line i'll wait in that line i ain't going i'm pushing up the
street i'll get some noodles i got 15 minutes in me if you hit me with that 20 to 30 even if i'm
waiting for it i'm out like 15 i could do 15 on the phone that's nothing i could do a 15 minute
bid 20 to 30 i can't do it it's unreasonable what if they're parceling out the 15 15 at a bid. 20 to 30? I can't do it. It's unreasonable. What if they're parceling out the 15
15 at a time? You ever get hit with that
where it's like, it's only going to be 15?
I'm out. I'm out.
But if they got like, you were 15 in and they're
like, hey man, it might be another 10 to 15.
I got both of those 15s. I might not have
a 30, but I have two 15s.
There is always an Arby's nearby.
We can handle this. There is, exactly.
There's always an Arby's nearby.
Or whatever it is, wherever we're going.
I don't like those sensors at a restaurant.
You get that buzz you when it's ready,
because then you just stare at that fucking thing the whole time.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I don't like that.
I think it's broken.
Every time I think it's broken, I'm like,
they're probably calling our name.
I know I got mine before they got theirs,
and theirs is buzzing already.
That's always the shit where they're like,
they are for sure here after me.
Right.
For sure.
Hey, but all those kids, you got a table for seven?
You don't got me and my girl?
Like, get out of here.
Yeah, but that's their Roma tomato hookup.
That guy's like important.
I got to get him in.
That's Tony Roma.
That's Tony Roma, dude.
Seanis Jordan is here. Sean Cougar Mel jordan on instagram shawnis jordan on twitter
shawn patrick jordan in real life yeah there it is shawn about to go to boston
yeah man in boston tonight actually right when this oh yeah i'm gonna get there a day early i'm
gonna go to harvard walk around yeah what are you gonna do are you actually you should go get a
lobster that's what i did last time we went to boston hate seafood i'm gonna walk around yeah what are you gonna do are you actually you should go get a lobster that's what
i did last time we went to boston hate seafood we're gonna walk around harvard try to find a
skate shop and uh chill out i'm excited it'll be fun try to pick up three minutes for the celtics
garbage time yeah i'll just i'll just show up see what they say bro celtics garbage time is
still coveted right now they are fucking clean too good Too good. Peyton Pritchard, Oregon legend.
Peyton Pritchard can't even get garbage time for the Celtics right now.
Oregon legend.
He'd start on the Knicks right away.
Right away.
What's going on, Sean?
How are you, dude?
Good, man.
Chilling out.
Everybody, if you are feeling feisty around December 29th, come to F in portland we got simon gibson in the house he's fantastic every word out of his mouth is hilarious
i do not say that lightly you will love the show so come hang out other than that
that's it man hanging out with going on tour with you guys in a week there also just might
be people who are in town for the holidays at that show i don't know i don't know who might
be there lamarcus albridge is coming back. LaMarcus Aldridge is
from Portland? He just played for the Blazers.
But I said Aldridge because I told them they should
name the telecom bridge LaMarcus Aldridge
and nobody liked it. So I just said Aldridge.
That's funny. I like that. I like it.
Yeah, thanks. LaBasketball
Aldridge, dude. He's a Blazers
legend because he took two meetings with the Lakers
and didn't sign there. That alone
hangs his jersey in the rafter goes to kevin duckworth is going to be there doing 10 minutes it's going to
be great dude it's going to be a great set yeah steve blake it's going to be taking a charge on
the show bonzie wells bonzie wells will be there brandon roy little brandon roy action brandon
roy is going to be doing 10 minutes on the show dude until his knees give out and then
seated greg odin is booked but he won't show up it's gonna be great who was the little blazer that tried stand-up who was it it was um oh dude um there was a blazer oh man when you guys stand
up a couple times uh-huh i hate that shout out to glenn davis i love you dog but you gotta stop
is he doing is glenn davis doing stand-up? Oh, yeah.
Big Baby?
Big Baby.
I feel like your name is Big Baby.
You can do stand-up now. Star-studded event.
Star-studded event.
David Borey is here.
Cool guy.
Joe Xavi is sending it on Instagram.
Hey.
Not on Twitter.
No.
Starting power forward for the Denver Nuggets.
Finally.
You see it, Daniel?
No, I'm so happy with the Nuggets.
I'm sorry about Thursday, Ian,
but you know what?
The Mavs just did it to us
the day,
like two days before.
It's the circle of life.
Yeah.
We lost by one point
to the Mavs.
We're so good.
You know,
watch the Nuggets
December 22nd through 25th.
I'm going to be
at the Jimmy Kimmel Comedy Club
in Las Vegas.
And after that,
I'm going on vacation,
you know, so don't text don't write
unavailable i will kill you have you seen dion yet you didn't answer me i haven't seen dion but
i feel like because he bro since dion said that he is coaching at cu i see dion everywhere i see
dion at the water grill i see him at the fucking 7-Eleven. I see him outside of King Soopers.
Everywhere I go now, I'm like, that was prime time.
I know that was prime.
I feel his presence.
He's coming.
Yeah, he's here.
I don't know where he lives.
Bro, it's like you got to get on that staff.
I feel like you could talk your way onto that staff.
I think so, too.
And it's, like, fucked up that, like, I don't even like see you like that.
But this is one of the biggest things that's ever happened to me.
Like, as far as people moving to Colorado, it's like Sierra, because we know how Russell worked out.
And then primetime.
Like, it's, like, right here, man.
It's big for the state.
It's big for the state.
I feel like, you know, you ever watch that documentary where they talk about Vince Carter in Toronto and how he brought bottle service to Canada and changed the city?
I feel like that's what prime time is going to do. There's like a line you can draw from him to Drake.
Bro, that's what prime time is going to do.
He's going to bring barbecue to Colorado.
Shout out to Yazoo, but we
need more of it.
Did you see the speech?
Yo, yeah.
You're telling people they can leave.
Yo. I'm coming.
I just love that I'm coming. And then at the end,
I think his son was running the camera. They pointed
out the social media team. He basically kind of said
like, you guys do all right. I'll put you
on my social channels. Wow, he's already inspiring he's a business man yes yo i'm so it's big it's it is
huge like it's like for colorado sports it's like i mean back when i was in high school we had a
seven footer at ralston valley for basketball. That's about it.
That's the only other thing I can think of this big.
I can't think of anyone better equipped for this new age of college football with a full-blown transfer window and now the bag is legal than Deion Sanders, who definitely took the bag
every year he was at Florida State.
No, college football got so sexy, and he was like, all right, I'm in.
I'm in. It's like sexy. He went to Free Shoes University. You know and he was like, alright, I'm in. I'm in.
It's like sexy. He went to Free Shoes University.
You know what I mean? That's what I'm saying. He's ready
to hook people up with the, uh,
what's the sponsorship called? The
NAIA? NIL. Yeah.
NIL. Yeah, NIL.
Must be the money.
My man had a single. Come on.
Let's go.
CU's probably still gonna be bad,
but whatever, dude.
He should coach just via necklaces.
He should call plays via different chains he wears.
Just big.
The way like the Oregon sidelines hold up like the big pictures with like four different,
you know what I mean, to call like a different spread route or whatever.
It's crazy because he's going to be the first coach to get his own shoe.
Oh, no.
What's his name had a monarch? Oh, Pete Carroll. Pete Carroll dude. What's his name had a monarch?
Oh, Pete Carroll. Pete Carroll had a monarch.
Pete Carroll had a monarch?
He had a monarch. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I got a buddy who's real into monarchs. He's dumb.
And he got the Pete Carrolls.
So it's going to be Coach Primes.
We're going to be rocking Coach Primes.
Coach Primes.
Coach Primes. I think my feet would be too wide for a
Coach Prime. Yeah, it's going to be a narrow
silhouette. It's going to be like a not a Prime. Yeah, it's going to be a narrow silhouette.
It's going to be like a, not a Kyrie, but it's going to be like.
They're trying to run a 40 in some Coach Primes.
Popping Achilles.
Popping tibia.
Yeah.
We've never seen somebody tear every ligament in their entire leg.
Yeah, well, I tried to run a 40 in the Coach Primes.
What do you want to do?
I haven't ran a 40 in 35 years.
I saw you run a 40 a year ago
sean i can't believe nothing popped i really can't you had a time 40 we did foot races at this comedy
festival in denver this summer and uh under six i hope i think it was under six for sure
everybody was under six i want to say i got like four eight or something am i crazy that's not
that's not you did not run a four eight8. You didn't run a 4.8.
You definitely didn't run a 4.8, dude.
Jeff Tice didn't run a 4.8.
The guy who beat you didn't run a 4.8.
Listen, Jeff Tice, we don't give a fuck what Jeff Tice did.
I'll say it right here.
The finish line did.
Didn't nobody start to give a shit what Jeff Tice was doing,
and nobody's going to finish caring about what he's doing.
So as far as like speed-wise, the two fastest guys, AJ and Yedoye, they probably ran four
eights.
That's because AJ ran track at CU Boulder and Yedoye played college soccer.
They're like, but you did not run a four eight.
No, Sean.
I did like a four six.
Just under.
Yeah.
What did I do?
Five, two, five, three, five, four.
I don't know.
You were timing it.
I think you probably did. gentleman's 5'4".
Under 6'.
Respectable.
Not bad at all.
You have a daughter.
Still athletic.
I do have a daughter.
That's like kind of a Ben Roethlisberger,
a Ben Roethlisberger like year 15 of the career sort of level 4.
Right.
Like he's still got it, but he's not known as a scrambler.
You're like Kruk rounding second.
That was Brady's
40 combine time, I think.
It was 5-5.
I think it was low
fives or so. He had the worst combine
ever.
I think he ran a faster 40
on his 40th birthday than he did coming out of
Michigan, I think.
He had more hair now than he did back out of Michigan, I think. Correct.
And had more hair now than he did back then.
Yeah, that dude's juicing.
Something.
I don't know what the juice is, but there's juice.
As four dudes with hair, would you guys ever juice?
For what purpose?
Like, what am I trying to do?
Keep the hair?
Yeah, hair.
Like, I just saw a dude from my high school who was, like, luscious in the back of the day,
and now he's a straight-up bald guy,
and it's got me shook, to be quite honest.
It'd be tough.
I got a creeping hairline, for sure.
Are you gonna?
It's working its way.
It's like trying to leave a party without anyone noticing.
You know what I mean?
Like, it's not, like, clear.
It's not like, oh's not like oh shit where's
ian's hairline but it is like taking a couple steps back not saying goodbye to everyone listen
i know a guy who knows the guy if you're like if the only way i juice if it's you could get
me the limitless pill i'll take that well you're just good take your hat off oh i'm just saying in
life oh yeah you're gonna be fine yeah flowing You're going to be fine. You're flowing locks.
You got flowing locks.
Yeah, 41.
I'll just throw the hat on the futon, bruvs.
Who needs a lid when you got a hair like this?
I'm not worried either, but, you know.
I'm going for those, like, bald guy roles, I think.
I can't pass as, like, a dude in his, you know, like, 20s, 30s anymore.
So I'm just going to go for, like, I'm going to be young Tucci, maybe just, like 20s, 30s anymore. So I'm just going to go for like, I'm going to be young to cheat.
Maybe just like a yelling neighbor.
You know what I mean?
Maybe like man, like dude who manages a deli screaming at somebody like any just sort of
like creeping hairline rolls.
I can get my hands on.
You know what?
I wonder if it creeps all the way back, would you go full monkey butt or would you shave
that whole shit?
I might go stay with them.
They don't do monkey.
Who does monkey butt?
You gotta go stay with them. I might go stayatham. They don't do monkey, but who does monkey butt? You gotta go Statham.
I might go Statham
and just hope I have a beautiful skull.
If you bust out just the bottom,
I feel like it makes you look older.
Yeah.
It definitely does.
The Clyde Drexler?
Yeah, cut that shit all off.
Some say that was a difference
between Clyde and MJ's.
Clyde just hung on too long.
He hung on too long.
MJ went shave early and just different careers from that point. That's the killer instinct. I hung on too long. He hung on too long. MJ went shave early
and just different careers from that point.
That's the killer instinct.
I don't like MJ with hair.
When I see those first couple seasons, I'm like,
I don't know.
He was playing to score, not playing to win back then.
Exactly. And that was the difference.
Exactly. Jerry Ferrara's here.
No dates. Thank you so much for joining us.
No dates. No dates. I got no dates.
But you got podcasts. You got. No date. I got no dates. But you got, I mean, you got podcasts.
You got stuff to promote.
I got podcasts.
I'm writing on this Netflix show now, which I didn't even know I was a writer, which I'm figuring all that out, trying to get back to New York as much as possible for some Nick games.
So, yeah, that's all the good stuff right there.
Good insurance in the guild, though, huh?
The WGA?
They take care of you. Not bad. I mean, the SAG insurance good stuff right there. Good insurance in the guild, though, huh? The WGA? They take care of you.
Not bad.
I mean, the SAG insurance ain't bad either.
Yeah.
It's pretty good.
It's pretty good.
It's not bad.
I feel like I just joined the WGA, and they're like, hey, okay, you're down the strike, right?
We're going to strike.
Yeah, immediately.
I just got here.
I just got here.
You guys are already asking me to do something.
I just got here.
They're just checking, just making sure you're down to ride if they need you.
I'm down.
Look, I'm down.
I'm down, but give me a minute.
Can you just give me the card first?
I didn't even get the card yet.
You're going to have to pick it in front of some local CBS station in Cleveland.
Fuck.
Get my ass kicked.
There's a different line, not the shoe line, the picket line.
I'm going to get my ass kicked.
The picket line.
It's going to be you and Drew Carey holding signs.
not the shoe line the picket line i'm gonna get my ass it's gonna be you and drew carey holding sign can you talk about this netflix show or is that a is that a lock and key situation it's a
little bit lock and key because you know it's not the official green light just yet but it is you
know i i spent a little time in the entourage writers room i wrote a few episodes in the final
season but that was like 100 years ago so uh you know
this is definitely a different little pivot for me but uh i'm loving it i think writing is the
hardest thing in the world to do i mean act it's all hard but to me a blank page to a story or a
joke or whatever i think that's the hardest thing to do i don't understand how people break story
yet i don't i don't get it it's so crazy to me i've been like a late night writer for eight years but my wife like writes narrative tv shows and stuff like that i don't
understand it i did i did like they're like by page three it should like this should be happening
to propel the story forward and every time i'm on page three i'm like there's more jokes it's just
been three pages i don't understand how people do it. I have so much respect for it.
Yes, it's a whole new... I'm like in school right now also,
like in a way.
And I'm learning from...
It's Courtney Kemp's new show
who was the creator of Power
and all the spinoffs.
So I am learning from one of the best to do it.
So it's a little bit like a class situation too
because I'm sort of the new guy.
Fantastic.
I'm the old new guy.
I'm like doing it back to school. Yeah, I'm Rodney Dangerfield at back to school. I'm the old new guy. I'm like back to school.
I'm Rodney Dangerfield at back to school. I'm like the
old guy. Fantastic.
Keep an eye out for that.
Listen to Unleashed.
Listen to Bad for Business.
Watch Entourage.
Watch Power. Watch Think
Like a Man. Watch any other plugs?
No, I'm plugged up. That's it.
My hair's not plugged up, but I'm plugged up.
All my stuff. Catch me getting plugs
at a clinic in North Hollywood
here pretty soon.
My name is Ian Carmel, at Ian Carmel on Twitter,
at Ian Carmel on Instagram,
at Ian Carmel on a Jewish
Hanukkah app
coming up soon.
December 18th.
Everybody keep an eye out for Hanukkah.
It's going to be big this year. I'm going to be with you on the first day of Hanukkah.
Yeah, you'll both be with me on the
first day of Hanukkah. This is going to be great. Is that where we're going?
The Music Man? Is that on the 18th or is that the 19th?
Okay, wait. Shows the 16th.
I think the Music Man is the 17th?
Saturday. We're going to a
Broadway play, Jerry. We're going to be in New York
next week and we're doing a Broadway play.
I'm fucking amped.
What are you seeing? The Music Man.
Oh, the Music Man.
You sound like you never went to a Broadway play before.
I haven't. No, I'm never.
I've never had enough money to buy
dinner in New York, let alone go to a play.
So I'm thrilled about it.
He's also never had a scallop.
It's also Hugh Jackman who's playing the Music Man.
Oh yeah, awesome.
Hugh Jackman, Sutton Foster, all the songs you know and love dude it's gonna be a time
it's gonna be a real time river city uh what do i got to promote listen the shows in new york
are sold out there's uh on the off chance that you're in boston and you haven't bought a ticket
to the wilbur yet today there are There are tickets still available. There are.
Surprisingly. Couple
two three. Surprise, surprise. We weren't able
to sell out the 1200 seat venue
in this city we've only played
once before. But we have sold a ton of tickets and we
appreciate everyone who bought
a ticket to come see us in Boston. It's going to be an amazing
time. It's going to be so fun.
Thank you for that.
And then keep an eye out for more dates soon
i think that's about it uh watch the late late show listen to all fantasy everything
shout out to super producer marissa yeah that's me now we are gathered here today not only to
shout out super producer marissa though it is important we are we're here to draft something
that i can't believe we haven't drafted before this is such a good idea it is important. We're here to draft something that I can't believe we haven't drafted before. This is such a good idea.
It is. We're drafting movie
deaths. Once I started
making my list, I could not stop making my
list. This is like, this is a rich
This is a rich and fertile field.
I had to lighten it up. I went to a
dark place for a minute when I was like
I was getting all bummed out.
I was like, I'm going to die.
Just for a second. And then I watched for a minute when i was like i was like oh because i was getting all bummed out i was like i'm gonna die just for a second and then i watched for a second and you know i don't think that way but it's like yeah i because there's a lot of good super sad you know i'm sure we'll get to it
but it's like you know it's just classic plot device yeah took me to a dark place just for a
second is this when you realized that your own mortality was preparing for this draft yeah You know, it's just classic plot device. Yeah. Took me to a dark place just for a second.
Is this when you realized that your own mortality was preparing for this draft?
Yeah.
Before then, I thought it was me.
Me and Lestat.
We were just going to we were going to live forever.
And Thanos. Lestat Paul.
Fantastic.
Yeah, that's crazy.
Did you read those books?
What do you think, David?
I kind of.
It goes either way with you.
I read the dirt.
I read the heroin diaries. I read J Dirt. I read The Heroin Diaries.
I read Juggalo.
Those are.
And you read The Vampire Lestat.
Never read that.
The Big Three.
No.
The wife and I went on a tour in the Garden District of New Orleans that was put on by
like the New Orleans Travel or like Historical Society.
And we're thinking like, this is going to be amazing.
What a city of rich history.
Going back to the 1600s, the Spanish, the French, the American, you know what I mean?
Like, so many layers of history.
And we show up, and the lady's like, y'all like Anne Rice novels?
And we were like, no, we've never read them.
And then she was like, oh.
Like, she realized she wasn't going to have a lot to say.
It was still a stat.
But it was from the New Orleans.
Like, it wasn't supposed to be.
It was just supposed to be like a Garden District
tour, but this lady clearly only
knew about Anne Rice shit.
So she proceeded to give us sort of an Anne Rice
tour of referencing all
these books where we were like, and that was
inspired the setting for Lestat's
appearance in Novel 4
and we were just like, oh, okay.
That, and she pointed out where
Peyton Manning's dad lived and that was
kind of cool i'll take it yeah we went we were on a a tour of the quinault national rainforest
in washington laura and i have to it was just the two of us though so the dude just acted like he
was with a couple homies he stopped at his boy's house to charge his phone for a little bit he was
he pointed he goes uh he goes that's
where dave and gene live they live there for i don't know 50 years i'm like who gives a shit
and then he took us through the forest and he goes this is where the government and then he
looked back he goes not a lot of people believe this but i do this is where the government tested
their lasers and all the trees went sideways he said all the trees went sideways and laura was
so fucking mad you could see in her face because he was talking about bigfoot and shit i'm like hell yeah give me all this and she was just
i don't know she just wanted a tour bigfoot tour i just wanted the laser bigfoot tour
and i know where your homie lives with your phone charger it was tight laser floyd laser bigfoot
i'll sign me up for all of them now uh the way we determine the order of the draft is through
a rollicking game of rock paper scissors played between the three of you
and we throw on shoot
Here we go
Rock, paper, scissors, shoot
Oh, David wins
David wins by throwing a paper
against two scissors
It's the only way to play three-person rock, paper, scissors
David, as the winner of rock, paper, scissors
it is incumbent upon you to determine the order of today's draft
Before you do that, I will remind you, it is a serpentine draft.
And what is that?
That's a great question.
Since we were talking about snow, it's like if you have to dust the snow off the whip, off the windshield.
If you've got to scrape it or dust the snow off.
If you know what you're doing, you start at the top and you go from the right to the left.
And then you just go down a little bit.
And then you go left to right.
Go down a little bit, right to left. to right, go down a little bit right to left
and you do powerful scrapes.
It's about a powerful scrape.
It's not about being repetitive.
It's just about chipping at the ice.
So you just give it one good
and then pull back one
and just back and forth like that.
That clears it up.
Yeah.
And when you do it,
or at least when I did it,
it's always the credit card that doesn't have
any spending left on it because i don't have you de-lam it well it's the credit card man
yeah but so what i'm not gonna use that credit card again i had a card like that for getting
into doors yeah it's a door card it's a scraping ice card we would just turn on the the heat and
then like get down because it starts defogging at the base of the windshield and we would just turn on the heat and then like get down because it starts defogging at the base of the windshield.
And we would just tell ourselves that it's fine to only be able to see like two inches out of the windshield.
Oh, you drive all hunched over like Leota looking for the helicopters in Goodfellas?
Yeah.
Try fucking there, Karen.
Try fucking there, Karen.
Why would you do that?
Karen.
Basically, if you pick fourth in the first round, you pick first in the second round.
That's what a serpentine draft means for all our listeners david with that in mind what will the order of
today's draft be i'm going david sean jerry ian hot corner hot corner fantastic david that means
you have the first pick in the movie drafts all fantasy everything draft and we will get to that
pick right after this short break.
This episode of
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back to all fantasy everything the only podcast that has ever existed this is it except of course
for unleashed and bad for business available everywhere podcasts can be found but those are the three that's it if you
want a podcast those are the three yeah zach harper tries to pretend like he has a podcast
he doesn't that's a fiction to bill harper to william harper dude yeah he just he just gave
my show in uh portland oh he made the how was the portland show good oh it was great it was a very
fun time i told a couple jokes. They were good.
People like it when I make fun of stuff.
What more can you hope for?
I met Harper's co-host for Pedophobe when I was in San Francisco last weekend.
Pedophobe?
Yeah.
Is that what it's called?
No, it's called Cinephile.
It's about to say what?
Where's this show going?
Am I on the right show?
I was kidding. We've gone far right. I don't know if Pedophobe is... He's about to say, what? Where's this show going? Am I on the right show?
I was kidding.
We've gone far right.
I don't know if pedophobe is... No, what the fuck are you doing?
That was the last time Harper was on.
We had like a five-minute joke about her.
I didn't just make it up.
That's true.
I guess pedophobe is what you would want.
Afraid of children?
Yeah, I didn't say the other one.
I said pedophobe.
Or afraid of pedophile.
Yeah.
Afraid of pedophile?
Either way, it's good to be cautious yeah
cinephile or is it xenophobe xenophobe xenophobe but it doesn't matter what it is it doesn't exist
there's three podcasts we mentioned them david boy what is the first pick in the movie drafts
all fantasy everything oh man i brought up this movie a few times on this podcast i'm talking
when he fought spoiler alert spoiler alert for world's greatest episode yeah
yeah you shouldn't have fucking played it i'm talking world's greatest dad when he finds his
son oh damn dude that shit was in and it's like it's also like the whole crux of the movie
so it's very important but like robin williams you thought that he could only be
hilarious and then you see him do that and you're like whoa there's this whole other
there's this whole other thing you could have done you know what i mean it's like it's like
it's that seems amazing it's a yeah and it's so and he's so conflicted but it's still like
because the kid was so bad.
And it's, man, that shit, that shit, that shit is, it blew me away.
Blew me away.
Even the first time I saw it, it blew me away.
I think we had different strategies for this draft.
That's why I went to a dark place and shit like that.
So I had to take myself out.
That movie is heartbreaking, man.
It's in the craziest way. way like shout out to bobcat he directed it right oh yeah oh man that shit that shit was it was it
was uh that movie's a head fuck but that that that death scene is like one of the one of the best
ones i've ever seen in a movie world's greatest dad is one of the all-time like when video stores were still open slash like
when it first appeared where you're like oh robin williams world's greatest dad i'll grab this
sure yeah looks funny to me yeah he's holding a coffee mug on the cover up to mrs dalfire
let me throw this bad boy on you know know what I mean? The parents are visiting.
Mom and dad are in town for the weekend.
Let's find some lighthearted Robin Williams fare.
Late career Robin Williams.
Throw that on.
It was next to RV.
It does look very inviting.
It looks like it's going to,
it doesn't look like someone's going to die jacking off in it,
like right off the,
holy buckets.
Holy buckets. That's not what kind of movie it seems like it's gonna be no but then that guy dies yeah god it's heartbreaking which also was not even a thought
that had crossed my mind before that no although you heard like there were always rumors about like
who's the dude from david carradine david carradine right like that the
kung fu guy but i also don't need a belt to jerk off it's good enough the nxs guy too that was the
word oh really he died he belted it oh really that's the word i wear a belt when i'm jacking
off but just around my waist like i would need to hold up my pants while I'm peeing on it.
Or I wear my black belt sometimes.
I mean, sometimes
Donovan got me that black belt that says
Badisi Jojo. Sometimes I wrap that up.
Yeah, absolutely.
Just so you're aware, Sean Jordan holds a black
belt in Taekwondo.
I guessed as much. I get it.
Also, it's pronounced Taekwondo
apparently. It's not Taekwondo, apparently.
It's not Taekwondo.
No.
We've been doing it wrong for Taekwondo this whole time.
You could have waited in line.
You would have been fine.
You would have mopped those kids.
That's one thing they don't teach you when you start taking it.
First of all, this never, ever will work in a real fight.
Never.
Ever, ever.
The first thing they say is run.
The Taekwondo thing? The first thing they say is run. The Taekwondo thing?
The first thing they say,
they're like,
all right,
if you get,
if you,
if you smell trouble,
run.
I'm here so I don't have to run.
I've been running every day.
This dude trying to steal my red jean jacket.
Trouble call an adult.
Yeah.
Somebody tries to steal your Pierre Cardin JCPc pennies silk shirt oh man dude i had this red
denim jean jacket that this kid beat me up every single day for like a month off the bus trying to
get he never got it but i should have given it to him right away you had red denim yeah this is
before the crypt days like a stripper that's so crazy i had a red denim jacket yeah red denim jean jacket
was this after rough riders anthem came out or before
way before man you had your finger to the wind this is like when i was trying to dress like i
was in um what about your friends video or something like i was with hanging out with tlc
it was like cross colors like orange cross colors red jean jacket goofy hat carl can i shoes that is that kind of thing insane you just
like jenny from the block
i saw a child in red denim I wouldn't know what to think. Why is this kid so confident?
You think no dad at home.
That's the first thought.
Yeah, for sure.
Nobody told him this was a crazy move.
You're going to have flag-colored braces and stuff?
For some reason, you have fat dookie braids.
Well, you know, I did have little Mike D braids back in the day.
I'm sure that you did.
What else would you have to compliment the red denim?
Anyway, can I make my first pick and lighten it up a little bit, please?
I have like a, we live different.
I have like little baby eyes on polos and shit.
I had a lot of vests in the 90s.
A lot of vests.
Somebody sent me a little voice text on Instagram the other day.
They were like, hey man, I'm listening to an old episode and I can't stop laughing about
how you saw that dude hand the heater to the other guy in front of your middle school
like yeah i don't know weird roscoe yeah you know you were you were not risk youth
first pick i'm going i'm diving into true romance okay i am going where patricia arquette
ices out james gandolfini yeah that's a good one oh yeah it's one of the most one of the most saddest because like a part of me was just trying to go for who do i want to be who do i want to die in a movie
well in the movie where you know and like james he was so i think that's part of it yeah you got
to feel like some justice but that scene it's like it's so violent it's so they're both so
good in it he's so scary and she is so good in it. He's so scary. And she is so good at acting like,
she's just so hard, you know?
She knows, those scenes where they both know
exactly what's about to go down,
it's just like, how are we gonna do it?
They're just doing the dance.
But then she gets the drop on him,
like when she puts the corkscrew in his foot,
and he's like, okay.
Like, or no, wait, is that what,
she grabs the corkscrew and she's holding it up.
And then he's like, you wanna dance?
And he goes, he says like, stab me with it with it that's crazy shit that would be so scary but
then she does the g move and does it in his foot and then like ices him with the back of the toilet
top of the toilet and then gets the shotgun right yeah five days to shoot that scene i've read oh my
god five days yeah the gandalfini didn't do a lot
of interviews he's like he's my favorite all time i think yeah and he was on the actor's studio and
he talked about that and kind of how fucked up he was after doing that scene because of how violent
it was and he's like five days oh my god five days look at all the moving parts i mean all the
all the glass breaking and like that's a day going to the glass is a day totally right right right oh my god every time and like they got to
reset that room forever because it was so there's so much shit everywhere and like the makeup is
insane the whole it just that's your week like you got to come home to your wife she's like what'd
you do today and just to be in that headspace like it's james gandolfini to be
in the like okay i'm gonna i'm i'm killing this girl for like five days let me be in like the
headspace where i'm like murdering patricia arquette man that whole movie there's you could
do just a whole unfortunately the whole draft from that movie but it's it reminded me how god
man i love that movie it's so it's just so good all every single part of it
fantastic but that's she's laughing during it too you know what i mean while she like like
bleeding like snotting out the nose and like laughing at him like she's making
yeah you look ridiculous it's like an opposite scene like all that like usually you're used to
like you know the one like please no and she's like do hit me harder i don't give a fuck it's like whoa yeah circumvents all expectations yeah she's been through some shit you know i danced
with her sister one time did you really yeah in that beatles video oh that's right they can you
considered an arquette sibling yeah they call me the fifth arquette yeah i'm a billy preston of the
arquette yeah i'm a billy preston of the arquette family total song rosanna's about rosanna arquette you know that
drummer was dating her oh yeah tony scott dude tony scott was such like a like
like a visual director that's like such an insane thing to say but just like a lot like
lots going on a lot of very like stylistic in those scenes if you think about like
well not to dive into if you want to pick it but like at the the end scene there's all the like feathers
in the air the whole i mean the whole yeah it's crazy yeah anyway yeah he's one he's one of the
best to ever do it one of my favorites i don't want to see other movies but so good such a like
beautiful like yeah like doing a lot more than he has to. And I think the movie always like benefits for it.
I don't think this is gonna be the last time
we talk about Tony Scott.
I don't think it will be.
I hope so.
I feel like he's gonna be coming around again.
Let's keep it, well, let's keep it rolling.
Jerry, time for your first pick,
your first pick in all fantasy everything.
I'm not going Tony Scott movie.
Now look, this is tough to decide
because I see David's version.
I see Sean's version, like sentimental
versus guy should, person who should die.
I also look at it as an actor.
Like what scene would I not want to shoot?
Like how would I not want to fucking die?
Cause you're going to be there all day.
Someone like pisses on you and light you on fire.
Like,
you know,
I don't want to die like that.
So a lot went into this,
but I'm going,
I'm just going popular death for the fur.
I'm getting on the board.
I'm going Hans. Oh yeah fur i'm getting on the board i'm going hans oh yeah yeah getting on the board the slow motion yeah makes it amazing although i always
wonder as a kid like he's also has the gun in his hand i think yeah he does have a watch off yeah
like he could have theoretically went pop pop on the way down yeah sort of so i mean that's the
problem with a lot of these tests right
you think like you could have lived or not you couldn't have lived but he could have taken got
one back snape he could have got one he could have took one with him to the other side slithering
at least gotten balmy with him right so when when they did that they just dropped him right they
didn't tell him is that why he looked so surprised is because they just dropped him without saying
when that is the myth that uh whatever safety version they had though but they didn't tell him is that why he looked so surprised is because they just dropped him without saying when that is the myth that uh whatever safety version they had though but they
didn't tell him the take that it was going to be like hey we're actually going to drop you on this
fucking thing because his face looks like someone which i know he's a fantastic actor
enough respect but he was scared out of his mind when he started falling and slow-mo doesn't make
anyone look less scared ever so it's like you just slow-mo that already terrified.
It's pretty dope.
I just figured too.
It's Christmas time.
It's the holidays.
Everyone always debates.
Die hard is a Christmas movie.
Is it not a Christmas?
So I'm on the board with Hans Gruber.
That Mr.
That checks all the boxes.
Cause that's like,
you want this dude to die.
He has earned that death by just being a bastard for like an entire
movie you're like i i fucking hate this guy i love him that's how much i hate this guy but he was
pretty cool with the accent too he made him like you for a minute he liked him for a minute yeah
you were kind of on his side he only killed hans only killed two people in that movie he killed
mr kagri and then he killed that coke head what was his name um oh no no he uh lewis or what he goes
these people aren't your friend oh ellis ellis ellis yeah yeah yeah that guy yeah let me get
let me get a coke you just he had to come in that dude because you're just like man that guy's at
he's begging for and he was trying to snitch so that fuck that guy but one of the greatest
teeth performances of all time that dude's teeth are doing like a lot of work in that movie
i will say better teeth though ice man and top gun that's the best that's i mean that's the top one
that's the top one tooth performance he was working a toothpick for some of the movie
that's some of the best tooth that i've ever seen in Hollywood. Yeah. The other thing that Hans Gruber death has is a catchphrase, dude.
Because when Bruce Willey kills him, it's the, oh, what is it?
Happy trails, Hans.
Right before he shoots him.
Because he's got the gun taped to his back.
Hans thinks he has a drop on him.
I always wanted to try that i think it'd be
like i know the adrenaline's going but it'd be so hard to rip something out of duct tape on your
one bullet yeah and everyone the maniacal laugh he was just going and he just pulled it like
i'd too would be like what the fuck why are you laughing like that bro you're about to die
you can't have a gun tape to your your back's too bloody to have tape stick to it first of all so
how's that hans like what is it that thing you say yippee-ki-yay motherfucker and then
he starts laughing and then hans starts laughing and the henchman starts laughing and then
iced iced dude happy trails hans now he falls and johnson and johnson are like oh that's not a hostage
i didn't want to say it but you kind of you drug it down with your hans impersonation but then you brought it very home with your bruce willis impersonation thank
you because you think hans is russian for some reason from what i just heard i don't know what
he was mr takaki they never said i don't think they ever said yeah that's not the point they
were just terrorists yeah citizen of the world it was a blanket terrorism you know where i know they were from the red white and blue that's what i know that's
right that's goddamn right i think a couple of them were i think a hacker dude was okay yeah he
was theo oh shit you're right theo that guy and all around the house was stirring on a mouse, and one
security guard, and you're like, okay, so you're from
you're from like right here
Yeah, you're just from like Cleveland, you hooked up with these dudes
about
They called like a staffing agency
and they were like, do you have a hacker who's willing to die
for a
terrorist action? Oh yeah, we'll send
someone right over
Hans Gruber, that's one of the great deaths.
One of the great deaths.
That's what I was going to take,
but now it's time for my first and my second pick
as it is a serpentine raft.
Like scraping off a windshield, kind of.
That's right. That's exactly right.
If anyone's confused as to how that works.
Hate to paint myself into a corner
with the Jewish paintbrush here, but it is...
The Jewish paintbrush! The Jewish paintbrush here, but it is the Jewish paintbrush.
By the way,
if you ever pass the pamphlet called
The Jewish Paintbrush, do not read it. Please hand it back
to the person giving it to you. They don't have your best interest
in mind.
Isn't that an old ABA basketball
player? The Jewish paintbrush.
He played for
the Minneapolis Lakers, I believe.
Bucky Lowenstein, yeah, dude. Bucky Lowenstein. Yeah, dude.
Bucky Lowenstein, the Jewish paintbrush.
Long wingspan, dude.
A lot of low post work.
5'8", but a 6'8 wingspan, dude.
The paintbrush.
He invented the sky hook.
He taught Korean.
Long arms.
invented the skyhook long arms uh i i gotta take the raiders of the lost ark oh sure they open the ark of the covenant
yeah and all the nazis get iced yeah and specifically specifically that weird circle
glasses doctor yeah yeah face melter eyes still in the front just like one of the one of
the great deaths of all time god scared the shit out of me as a kid it's scarier than any current
day death like with with like modern cgi and stuff that's way creepier looking practice like you talk
about earning it they're fucking nazis so right off the bat you're excited to see them die they've
been bastards this entire time they've got their hands on the Ark. That's bad news for everybody.
And then
as far as graphically, just
amazing. Practical effects.
1980s. Couldn't do it on a
computer. Had to figure it out.
Full-blown, just disgusting.
You see them melt. It's great.
Yeah.
It's scary.
I watched it. I've watched the clips of so many deaths in the last couple nights
just from do you remember the which was a temple of doom which is the one where the dude in indiana
reached through the guy's chest yeah that fucked me up when i was a kid i hope that's not anyone's
death i apologize if i just stepped on the death that one fucked me up not the main character at
all those movies scared me those movies scared me as a kid in general well because
you're old enough to be like wait wait wait wait wait wait and then you have to look to an adult
to be like tell me that that right right no like my heart can come out right and he didn't even get
right the guy just went like this like he was pushing it through like i don't know cheese or
something it just like you're like my body can't be that easy to get through, right?
It's got to be harder.
I got a chest plate.
They all had scary deaths
because I feel like Indiana Jones is now off the board.
Like in Holy Grail, the dude picks the wrong grail
and then just like immediately turns old.
They were all just like,
they were all like creepy deaths.
A lot of stuff you didn't want to have happen.
Since we're talking about it, and to be honest,
could you guys do the hand and the bug in the bug pit
thing would that fuck with any of you i couldn't even kind of do it i don't do i don't do that
shit my daughter would have to be in there for for me to do that and i would still yeah yeah
but it'd be tough i don't know bugs don't fuck me up like that man so what if a cockroach was
like on you it wouldn't i don't like it but i'm i'm afraid of like any animal bigger i'm afraid of like any animal bigger like if it was like a like a bunch of raccoons no i wouldn't like it, but I'm afraid of any animal bigger. I'm afraid of any animal bigger.
If it was a bunch of raccoons, no, I wouldn't do it.
They're kind of cute, though.
No, they're not.
They have hands like people.
They're mean as shit.
They are mean as hell.
I used to have standoffs with them in Golden Gate Park sometimes,
and they'd be looking at you.
Like what?
You need to watch Pocahontas again.
I used to mess with this girl who lived across Golden Gate Park from me.
You mean you used to leave flaming bags of poop on her stairs and stuff?
No, I would have sex with her, Sean.
I'm an adult.
I would walk across the park back to my house a lot of times at like 3,
4 in the morning, and you would just see these.
You'd be like walking across the baseball diamond or something, and these raccoons would come out of the bushes and then they just like it would just be a stare on you it'd be like a stare down like
i'm looking at you and you're looking at me and it's like so what are we going to do about it was
like james gandolfini and arquette yeah luckily it never went that way but i yeah i don't trust
them at all i
i'm scared of them because they're bigger than you think they're going to be that was gandalf
phoenix dude going method to prepare for a live action pocahontas getting ready getting in
character oh man nazi face melter and raiders of the Lost Ark. Time for my second pick. Good pick. I got to get Arnold.
Oh, man.
Going down.
Thumbs up.
Oh, yeah.
Melting.
Come on.
That's amazing.
Thumbs up.
Heart-wrenching, dude.
A hero's death.
It was amazing.
Yeah.
Hasta la vista, baby.
Shout out to James Cameron, dude.
I'm going to go see Way of Water.
I'm seeing it.
Oh, fuck yeah.
I'm going to go see it, dude. I don't give a shit. Come on. I'm seeing that in 4 of Water. I'm seeing it. Oh, fuck yeah, you're gonna go. I'm gonna go see it, dude.
I don't give a shit. Come on. I'm seeing that
in 4D. I saw Wakanda Forever.
I thought it kind of sucked, but I still saw it.
I'm dressing up like it's the opera. I'm going.
We're getting all gussied up.
I got a confession. What?
You never saw Avatar? You never saw the first one?
Oh, man.
Just visually, it's worth it.
So, quick story we had james cameron did a cameo on entourage back in the day right playing himself man yeah in between one of the
setups he's like tells us like come back to like he had like his own trailer and shit come back to
our channel and show you what i'm working on. He starts showing us the drawings for Avatar. This is in 2004, 2003.
Oh, shit.
What?
And this is a bunch of blue people.
But out of context, you're looking at it.
You're like, I don't know what movie this guy's making.
Should we tell him?
Yeah.
So I just never.
I don't know.
It just slipped out of the ether
so I'm gonna like
watch that
before
in a weird way though
it has paid off
cause now I get to
I'm jealous of people
get to watch
dope shit
for the first time
totally
after everyone's
watched it like
a hundred times
I get to watch that
from scratch
you know
that's the way to do it man
that's why I don't watch
popular shit
I've only seen
the last episode
of Game of Thrones
with these guys I still have the whole thing I can can do whatever yeah it's a good position to be in
position of power we like uh you also have the benefit of remembering what happened in avatar
because that first one came out so long ago yeah i don't i have no idea what happened in that
first movie it's just pocahontas i re- re-saw it when they re-released it a couple
months ago. I went and saw it again. It's just
Pocahontas. Pretty much what it is. They paint with all
the colors of the wind. Yeah. Yeah.
Pocahontas getting a lot of heat in this episode.
That's too, yeah, that's too.
Coming for you. Trending up,
dude. But, yeah,
T-1000 just
getting melted down.
A hero's death that shit hurt too
like when T1 like I
felt that because I remember we saw
that as a kid I'm pretty
sure we saw it in the drive-in
in Tacoma
Washington love it
if I remember right it was a double
feature and it was like the
first one was a kids movie
and then the second one was t2
and i was supposed to be asleep but i caught it oh yeah if i remember right
kindergarten kindergarten cop t2 a full arnold travolganza
it's not a tumor he's not a tumor uh but yeah i remember that that that would hurt man
because you thought he was gonna be he, you thought he was going to take care of them.
They needed someone to take care of them.
We loved him.
A robot learning to, like, learning to love?
Classic story, dude. Yeah, yeah.
In real life, it's not going to be the same.
Time honored.
Shout out to Arnold.
Shout out to Arnold the Doctor from Entourage as well.
Shout out to Arnold, dude.
Shout out to Arnold Palmer.
Yo.
Shout out to Arnold.
The trick of the man.
Yeah.
That's my second pick. Jerry. That's my second pick.
Jerry, time for your second pick.
This is tough now because you start to round out the squad here.
And there's so many good ones left on the board.
I'm going Sonny Corleone at the toll booth.
Oh, my God.
I can't believe we got out of the first with that.
I can't believe we got out of the first with that.
I kind of feel like I stole something here.
Yeah, that's crazy.
I kind of feel like I stole one. But That's crazy. I kind of feel like I stole one.
But again, one of the deaths as an actor,
you're like, how many fucking squibs
are you going to put on me?
You put 150.
As someone who's been squibbed before,
it's not fun.
It's just a little explosive devices.
You have on like a vest.
It doesn't hurt,
but someone's pointing a gun at
you and you feel pressure and it's enough to move you that's why you always see people die like this
it does move you a little bit it's a little explosives a blood packet so i think the most
i've ever had to wear i think was eight that motherfucker wore like 150 square i think it's
the most squibs ever worn by an individual in one shot. You don't understand. That has to be mentioned.
I feel like that was worst squib technology.
It wasn't great, but I think he even had a few on his flesh,
like on his arm that went off.
Like burn marks and stuff.
So I feel like for that alone, that needs to be someone had a draft app.
But also iconic toll.
I mean, we talk about the toll booth all the time.
You say toll booth, that always goes through your mind.
When the operator just ducks and then Sonny's like,
what's funny?
He takes the quarter off.
You see it for a second,
like,
wait a second.
And then all the dudes pop up
because you,
I wasn't expecting
all that,
like the six dudes
to come out of the other toll booth.
Right.
Just Tommy Dunham.
I've been watching that.
Toll booths in the 40?
That's like a toll booth in the 40.
Who knew that
that's what toll booths look like?
Have you guys been watching that show on Paramount plus about the making of the godfather with miles
teller yes i watched it so fun so much this is like fun man and yeah the book is awesome it's
kind of loosely based off of or there's another good book if you ever want i think it's called
leave the gun take the cannoli i shit you not that's the name of the book uh also a good behind
the scenes of of the godfrey but the offer is great on paramount no that's awesome but now i
gotta figure out what to retitle my memoirs how do they know he was gonna take that road i don't
like it that what do you mean it's the only way to get to his sister's house yeah he's on the way
to connie's yeah only one road in one road out they take go between yeah yeah man i think i just decided i'm
gonna re-watch the godfather tonight oh dude that's a good call david why is it so hard to
kill like a mob in it you think like in all these movies it's so hard to do but you're like they're
they're not the president it just seems like it should be easier to do sean yeah i know i know and i know that i get to get to him
just yeah just i mean thousands and thousands of you watch all these movies and you're like
this person was around so many people all the time just seems like it takes one person who
doesn't around him know him so it's like people understand there's consequences on the street and
stuff like you also got to be ready like you have to know if he's out in public you got to know that you're
gonna die there's not a lot of people i don't think who are willing to kamikaze that shit
you know what i mean yeah they're not doing it to win a war they're doing or i guess they're doing
so when when gadi killed paul castellano who was the mob boss of the gambino family 1985
it took they planned that murder for like seven months until they found the moment and they got the right amount of guys and the the best story and they
got them i literally think it's almost to the day uh christmas time outside the spark steakhouse in
manhattan because it's also that king shit right if you're gonna shoot at the kid if you're gonna
shoot for the king you have to kill him yeah yeah so it's like you can't you can't you can't you can't
can't ain't no half step and that's why we can't kill that mob boss sean yeah put the tulia you
guys can't see but sean's just waving a glock around yeah the whole podcast he's been watching
the time i'm gonna use the word gesticulating yeah one of the new ones gen fives yeah sean jordan you and your glock what is your second pick
uh i'm gonna go i'm gonna take it back to uh one of the most fun movie desks to watch
another iconic one um kind of funny but just just a great movie all around it's about a professional
doorman which just doesn't seem like a movie that there should even be but i'm going the throat rip in roadhouse oh yeah i just happened to watch roadhouse randomly about two weeks about a cooler
sean get it right yeah a famous a world famous cooler it's just so such a good movie but that
scene is just it's just it's crazy to think about that happening. It's kind of like the Onomshibai, Indiana Jones,
where you're like, can you do that?
It seems a little more feasible to me.
But he...
I don't think so.
I don't...
You'd have to have total drug dealer fingernails
on every nail.
You'd have to dig in and get it out.
But yeah, it was just crazy.
I remember not having seen the movie
and then somebody telling me about that. And that was the only reason I watched it back in the day. And then you wait and wait dig in and get it out. But yeah, it was just crazy. I remember not having seen the movie and then somebody telling me about that.
And that was the only reason I watched it back in the day.
And then you wait and wait and wait and wait.
And then he just does it
in a place where you don't really think it's going to go.
The guy's already there, almost dead.
And then he just rips his throat.
It's nuts, man.
But Barry holds a special place in my heart.
Yeah. There's some great deaths in that
movie overall all of them man i mean that's like with these movies it's hard to narrow it down to
the one especially the like your diehards or whatever where you're like i don't know there's a
they're all pretty rad not rad but you know what i mean movie rad movie rad movie rad yeah anyway dalton ripping out um
because that you remember what the guy says right before like when they're fighting you
remember that dialogue no they say some crazy shit i don't remember at all he leaned he leans
over and he goes i used to fuck guys like you in prison is what he said and i it's probably
something you wouldn't probably say in a movie these days and you're just like holy because i
hadn't seen it in years i was like cheese and rice and then he says that and then he starts to try to
kill dalton and then dalton gets the drop on him and then rips his throat up but they really the
dialogue in that scene they really paint that guy to be the worst guy. I'm going to have to watch that scene.
It's gnarly.
Sam Elliott is sexy as hell in that movie, too.
He's sexy as hell in everything, man.
He's sexy as hell in everything, but he's hit a very unique and special level of sexy in that movie. He's got his long hair, and he's always doing this thing in the middle of a fight.
He might be sexier then, and I'm sorry to say this.
He might be sexier than Pat Swayze in that movie, dude.
He is not.
No.
Come on, man.
That's crazy.
You're wild.
You take a woman who's been hurt,
she might want to be with Sam Elliott more.
Dude, Patrick Swayze says the iciest shit in that movie.
Pain don't hurt. No one ever wins a fight fight you don't get sexier than no one ever the doctor goes you ever win a fight
he goes nobody ever wins a fight that is pretty sexy the fact that he does that yeah yeah look
ellen's a good consolation prize yeah like the friend you know those two dudes walk in
yeah it's good wingman.
Nobody's girls going home
satisfied. Those two dudes walk in.
I just think
you ask a certain kind of woman. She's
picking Sam Elliott. I think that's fair.
A certain kind of person.
I'm just saying I think she's got a kid at home.
He's acting up. You know what I mean?
Sam looks
like he can get on the kids level.
You know, she doesn't have a great relationship with her ex, but he's still on the on the
scene.
You know what I mean?
Like, he's not out of her life completely, but it's a bad relationship.
But he does have partial custody.
Like, I think you go for Sam Elliott.
There's a path.
Yeah.
There's a path.
He has a path.
If you haven't seen them in action, you're going to think Sam Elliott's bucker than Swayze
for sure.
If you haven't seen him in action, you don't know that they're equals.
I'm just saying.
I would think that Swayze was young and ripped.
I would think.
I would not.
I'm not fucking.
Listen.
Two tough guys.
That's all I'm saying.
Two tough guys kissing.
Everyone wins.
Everybody wins.
David Borey.
Time for your second and third pick.
I mean, I got to take it.
I got it on the wall.
I'm taking Cleo and set it off man oh that shit when he she told him to get out the car like she told him to
get out the car knew what was going on keeps going the ghetto birds are flying lapd in the front in
the back she just smokes a cigarette like crying and just hits it man that shit was that shit was amazing
that shit was a running theme on this podcast but queen latifah does not get enough credit bro
she hit the switches that's what she did she smoked a cigarette hit the switches they had
the machine guns on her the helicopter and she just drove through that shit and you see it like before she slumped there's
like this shot where she's just like back smoking the cigarette and like just like driving through
and they're killing her amazing she's got the sean jordan braids in yeah i don't think you
should call cornrows that i'm not i'm not for that please sean. He's got the Sean Jordans. Let's get that going. Please, please, please.
I'm not for it.
But yeah, it's just like, it was like a music video.
You know what I mean?
It's like high drama.
Overall, because the movie is not, you know what I mean?
It's fun.
It's fun.
It's fun.
Well, it's not fun.
But that helps the movie.
That's the best part of the movie.
That uplifts the movie.
That's the best part of the movie. That's the best part of the movie. That uplifts the movie. That's the best part of the movie.
That's the best part of the whole thing.
Because then also you forget she gets out at the end.
She gets out with the Uzi.
Right.
So not only does she drive through them, they slump her.
Then she comes out with the Uzi.
She's wearing like a Dickies coverall suit.
Yeah, there is.
We can call that the Sean Jordan, right?
Yeah, yeah.
She's got the Sean Jordans in her hair.
She's wearing the Sean Jordan, pulling out the Sean Jordan.
Uzi.
Man, this is a good day for me.
She comes out with the Uzi.
And then she dies like on the top of the fucking car door.
And it's like she's got that like moment.
Yeah. Amazing. Amazing. Brave man's death. Yep. Brave man's death. like on the top of the fucking car door and it's like she's got that like moment yeah amazing
amazing brave man's death yep brave man's death or hero's death told all the girls to get out of
there so yeah cleo in set it off is my second pick see now i don't know where i want to go well it's yeah okay i have one and tell me if this is fair
this is where i like you going this is i just want to know if this is reasonable
i want to do it and it will be off the table but i don't think any of you guys are going to pick it
i want to do the funeral scene for miles in my girl
oh they don't they don't show him uh yeah because he gets stumped by all those bees
right i mean that'd be crazy if that was a deleted scene in my girl
uh i mean i was that care i think we can i mean jerry what do you think how do you feel i think
that counts yeah i think it's counts because it's Jerry, what do you think? How do you feel? I think that counts.
Yeah, I think it's counts because it's an it's an iconic death, even though if you don't if it's off screen, the actual physical death and because he was a kid, I think that was
actually done in good taste for.
And as a kid, though, that's definitely that was a memorable one for sure.
You say that.
Don't try that.
Yeah.
I didn't know children could act like that.
He can't see without his glasses.
Oh, bro.
Oh, just like that shit was a myth because she wasn't even supposed to be in the funeral.
Remember, I could feel myself welling up when you just said that.
Yeah, I got goosebumps.
And Macaulay Culkin is dead as hell.
Oh, as hell.
Oh, it is.
That qualifies.
You remember he still had like shit on his face?
Yeah.
And then Jamie Lee Curtis comes to pick her up.
Dude, that shit, that was like.
Seriously, I'm almost going to cry.
That shit was insane.
Dan Aykroyd is like, Ava, Ava, aliens are real.
And like, yeah, that part that that that one
was like that was because i remember watching that movie as a kid not knowing that that was coming
yeah dude because nobody tells you you have an emotional death team right now
they're all feeling it they're all feeling it yeah yeah because she like ran off right and then
she ran into that guy she was in love with but uh yeah that that one was like woof and then she
started like you should put her fingers it's just like how do you even get it how do you get someone
to do that let alone a kid is insane and now she does comedies that uh anna chlumsky woman now she she was in like veep and everything
she was like yeah and veep for a while yeah she's like stayed she stayed in the game good for her
she didn't become a crazy child actor uh that yeah that that that scene was like oh man that's
icy that shit fucked that shit fucked me up as a kid because also as a kid when you watch it you're
like that could happen to kids that's the killer where you're like wait a minute
i see bees every day there's bees everywhere outside it's an uneasy piece with the bees
it's an uneasy piece i don't look at them it's like they know an uneasy piece i feel like we
as humanity you remember when they were like, hey, all the bees are dying
and it could cause massive crop death and famine?
I feel like without My Girl 2, we act faster as a society to stop that.
Clicker response.
Yeah, I think part of us were like, well, fuck the bees.
Yeah, we don't like the bees.
Yeah, they're not helping us.
Actually, fuck the bees, though.
Sean Jordan.
Time for your third pick.
This is tough.
You're not going to.
All right, I'll do this one.
I'm going to go to The Departed.
And I'm going to go to the.
Yeah, I'm going to go to The Departed.
I'm going to go to the Departed. And I'm going to go to the... Yeah, I'm going to go to The Departed. I'm going to go to the very last death
in The Departed
where Marky Mark shoots Damon.
Where Damon just walks in
and he's just standing there.
And that whole last...
Whatever.
I know we've beat that movie to death on this show.
But that whole last part of the movie,
you're like,
so when's he going to die?
When is it going to happen?
And then he just walks in.
He's like, just do it. I i'm done my girl's out i tried to
snitch like i couldn't yeah i just he just did everything is the worst like no dna suit too like
he's got like a hair neck yeah he's got the booties on yeah the booty like he's bringing that couch in the house just like a fucking pottery barn delivery guy we uh we hired movers for the first time in my life
when we moved into this crib and they all had the booties on and that's all i was thinking about was
like hmm that's that's what i think what if they ice me right now yeah i see the booties i'm like
guys thank thank you.
You really didn't have to do it.
I don't even care that much.
But that's just class all the way.
Thank you.
I just got a dresser delivered and they did that.
Yeah.
Also, though, tried to play me.
They were very much like, you live here?
Oh.
Like, wow, you live here?
And then they're like, are you from denver and i was like
listen man i could get a pottery barn dresser don't be like that wait a minute they were saying
it like they were saying it like you live here i think it was i think it was like you live here
gotcha you know what i mean like yeah it was not great no i still tipped because i always tip got tip there's like it's it's still
racist but the the what what is that black guy doing here thing in society at like fancy places
that wasn't even the vibe the vibe you think that's what it is the vibe was more like because
they were young they were they were mexican dudes and we were talking about the nuggets and the shit
the vibe was more like wait you're like me you live here that's what yeah right but they're like what did you do to get here like
that kind of thing okay yeah yeah yeah and i told him i was like i rap you have to that was on me
but there's people that like like there's a black guy here at this fancy place are they are they
like a rapper or an actor or an athlete like that's there's that thing that happens in society this is a white this is a white lady building
though because every time i see my white lady neighbors they're always like that's 7-eleven
it causes such drama i'm like i shopped there that's what i do it's like no it's a 7-eleven
i stay at a 7-eleven they know me yeah there's drama if they're out of the fucking jalapeno.
Yeah.
Try to go go to Kino's, dude.
There was drama when I couldn't buy some clear eyes before that Zoom call the other day.
That was the drama.
Oh, yeah.
Shout out to the guys downstairs.
They're really working.
Fucking chat at the 7-Eleven.
Like, there's a, like.