All Fantasy Everything - Words That Start With The Letter Q (w/ Katie Nolan, David Gborie, and Sean Jordan)

Episode Date: November 9, 2023

Quite an apt topic, if you ask me.Episode Guest:Katie Nolan @KatieNolan (@NatieKolan)Support the show!Join the All Fantasy Everything Patreon for ad-free episodes, mailbags, and video pre-rolls. Follow the Good Vibes Gang on social media:Ian Karmel @IanKarmel (IG: @IanKarmel)Sean Jordan @SeanSJordan (IG: @SeancougarmelonJordan)David Gborie (IG: @Coolguyjokes87)Isaac K. Lee @IsaacKLee (IG: @IsaacKLee)See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. What's up, all family members? It's Ian Carmel. I want to tell you about a new podcast I have with my friends Isaac Lee and Zach Harper. Are you a basketball fan? Do you like the NBA? Are you curious about what Victor Wembenyama is going to do this season? Do you think Scoot Henderson is maybe going to win the MVP, the Defensive Player of the Year, and the Rookie of the Same Season.

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one episode every week, probably no more than three discussing everything going on in the NBA right now. It's at patreon.com slash emotional hoops. It's $5 a month, and that gets you exclusive basketball content. We just recorded our first episode. It's two and a half hours long, and that's what you can expect from us. Way too much talking about the sport that we care about more than almost anything in the world, and even some of the things that aren't sports-related.

Basketball. Live from the internet this is all fantasy everything i'm your host ian carmel and joining oh wait shit i gotta do that again because i gotta work in the intro okay live from your headphones, this is All Fantasy Everything, a podcast where we fantasy draft anything and everything from the world of pop culture. And now it's time for your host, Ian Carmel. Hello, everybody. Welcome to All Fantasy Everything.

Hello, everybody. Welcome to All Fantasy Everything. They just couldn't see the change in the face. I grew a mustache, too. I immediately sprouted a mustache. Let's just not do that intro and just jump into the podcast here, Ice. How do you feel about that? I like it. Merv Griffin. In this case, Merv Griffin. Ice Griffin. I am Ice Griffin now? Okay. Yeah. Ice Griffin.

I'm scared of that guy. I'm scared of Ice Griffin. Ice Griffin. I am. Yeah, you got to be scared of Ice Griffin. Tell me Ice Griffin's coming to my apartment party. See if I want Ice Griffin over there. No, he can't come to your apartment party. I don't. No. You can go to his apartment party. See if I want Ice Griffin over there. No, he can't come to your apartment party. I don't. No. You can go to his apartment party.

Be careful. Mind your P's and you know what else you mind? Your Q's, bro. You know where that's from? Fines and quarters. That's the thing. I know him.

Fines and quarters. Yeah, etymology. Speaking of knowledge, Katie, Holy Buckets, you murdered it on Jeopardy now that we're on wax. Real quick. Hold on.

It's the beginning of November. All Fantasy, All real quick hold on it's the beginning of november all fantasy all fantasy everything lister's is the beginning of november welcome to november katie noel is here sean jordan is here david bory is here your host dean carmelo's here there we go and now sean the iciest episode of jeopardy i've ever seen i've seen a lot of episodes of jeopardy it was and i'm not too too, I don't want to drag anyone through the mud, but they were in the red almost the whole time. It's a hard game. And you were up nine racks. It's a tough game.

To zero, dude. Jeopardy's very difficult. Didn't look hard at all, my friend. Not hard one bit. And if you play it every night like a real dork and you take celebrity jeopardy really seriously like a real dork then maybe you too could run up the board it's like you know you were in there on a limitless pill like that was your that was your one of the books i've read was where they were talking about how hard it actually is to click

the clicker and like how it's not what you think and you have to time it perfectly at the end of the question. Is that right? To get the click. Yeah, otherwise you get locked out

for a quarter. If you buzz before they open the gates, then you get locked out. And so if you buzz a little early, you're screwed. You have to buzz when the lights go on.

You look like you were returning something and you knew it was going to get returned and you were going to get a full refund. Where you were just casually like, yeah, it's fine. I'm just standing here. You looked so calm, so cool. I was so excited.

I was making noises when I was watching. It was sick, man. I stood up for a second. Quick question. He was draped in an American flag. He was. I love that. that up for a second? Quick question. He was draped in an American flag. He was, yeah. Oh, I love that.

Christopher Maloney's took us in person. Great. How was it? Outstanding. Fantastic. Of course it is. Everything you thought. I took a quarter out

and then I was like, don't do this. You should have done it. Yeah, I thought about it. You should have, Ken, I'd like to, I'd like to, I'd like to bet one quarter

and then you just bounce it right off. Bounce it right off. Yeah. I mean, it would have, you'd have to watch out. It'd come to bet one quarter. And he'd just bounce it right off his. Bounce it right off, yeah. I mean, you'd have to watch out. It'd come right back at you. It's a great ask. To be fair, though, you could bounce a quarter off a badass. No, I've tried.

You could. Really? Wait, wait. He's just kidding. Hey, Dan, come here. I have to go to work. That was a weird Dan impression. No, it was actually spot on.

I thought that was him outside the door. I was just listening to his Chappelle impression. Kind of loved it. For me, it's the things he says. It's like the phrases, you know? But it's pretty good. It's pretty solid. I haven't heard it.

Yeah, it's pretty. Unlike Sean's RZA, it's very. I was going to say, I'll back up a little bit. He does a bit where he does Chappelle talking about like deep old, like 80s, 90s hockey. And I don't know why. And I don't know how he gets into it. But it's very funny every time. Kind of the most Dan Soder bit I've ever heard.

I know. Talking about Luke Robitaille as Dave Chappelle. He's like, Mark Messi. I can't do it. But he's like, Mark Messi. I can't do it, but he's like, Mark Messi. I'm not going to go into it any deeper, but that joke he has where he's like, Dan Soder, heavy sleeper, nice to meet you.

Man, that shit made me pee my pants. Katie, can you tell me exactly at what point you realized you fucked up the math for Final Deopardy? Okay, I can, because that's actually a very interesting question. I was wondering when you realized it. They give you paper to figure it out, which I did. And I said out loud and they must have on camera somewhere. I go, can I get someone to check my math? Is that allowed? And they said, no. And so I, I read, no. Yeah. They said, no, I did. And I redid them. I

kept looking at it and being like, yeah, that's right. That's what it is. You double what he has and then subtract it from what you would be like. And that's how you figure it out. And then as we're going, as they're like three, two, one, I go, oh no. I like looked at his, I looked at mine. I took the second step that I guess I forgot to take. And I went, you're going to talk. So they come out.

Ken does the like, welcome back to Jeopardy, blah, blah, blah. And something was wrong with the cameras. So they go, stop, stop, stop, stop down. And I'm like, now's the time. Now's the time. You should say something

because we had this big speech from this Jeopardy cop, this game show guy who comes up for the show. Yes. And Stabler was very good friends with him. I'll tell you right now,

he got real buddy, buddy with him. I bet they did. And I was like, dun, dun, you know? So the Jeopardy cop was like, listen, if at any point you're unclear on the rules or you think that you've forgotten how to play or you need a clarification or anything, the game needs to be fair. So just let us know and we'll stop down and we'll take care of it. Did you ask him if his body cam was recording?

I said, that's not on, isn't it? That's just for show. So I thought about it and And then I was like, no, you can't. Don't embarrass yourself. Just deal with it. You'll just deal with it. And then they came in and they did it again. And then the second that he said, when he got the answer, that was when I knew my answer was right. And that he doubled his money and that we were going to tie. So I like smiled and then was like, shit. And I think you hear me say, I heard something and maybe

I'm just projecting, but I think you hear me go, fuck. I realized that I tied it like an idiot. It's still pretty cool. It's just typical me. For a second there, people thought I was really smart

and then I did something very dumb and they were like, Oh, she's still just, he came back down to our level. That was nice. Honestly, it was, it was very graceful of you.

That's what it was. God, I want it because if I had blown it and lost, I'd be a different person. Now I would be drinking on these. I would be, it'd be dark. So the mascara smears when you put it on kind of thing.

Yeah. Immediately. Yeah, man. That's fantastic. Give me that to Christopher Maloney's butt. Like, what kind of angle are we talking? Like, is it, does it really go out as far as it looks like when he's just standing at rest? It goes out quite a bit.

He may be able to do that little Instagram TikTok trick where you pop it out so that it looks better in pictures that I famously employed at your wedding. Thank you very much for that. Of course. We were all doing it. But it is nice. But look, you also don't want to objectify your opponent. This is a sport. Absolutely. I believe in the sanctity of

Jeopardy, and so I snuck a little... I tried not to... If you're at the Grand Canyon, you're going to look at the Grand Canyon. Right, and take a couple pictures, and I did. Take a couple pictures. Send a pose with it. You might ride a donkey down in there.

You know what I didn't realize is he's Freak Show in Harold and Kumar. I didn't realize that. Oh, I didn't realize that either. I didn't realize that until I was IMDB-ing him after the ep. See what else he's in. Yeah, he's a freak show. He's very funny.

Sean, you've looked up Christopher Maloney's butt, right? Probably. I feel like I'm not getting much of a response from Christopher Maloney's butt on here. No. I feel like you've seen it. Is it a thing? I mean, it's like a thing that people... No, I don't think I've ever heard lore of Maloney's butt.

No, but I'll look it up right now. Bro, it's insane. I'll be the judge of that. Every woman my age I told he was my Jeopardy guy, they were like, holy shit. Can you give him my number?

Can you sneak my number into his phone? Oh! Yeah, there we go. My man is Jay. Are you eating cakes like that? Look at that. Yeah, it's not... That's a couple footballs back is... He had kicks like that? Look at that. Yes, son. That's a couple footballs back there.

It's not like that. It's not fully... It wasn't fully like that. Maybe he had different pants on. There's no way it's like that. My man is packing a pack of hostess. That's got to be a joke. That's got to be a joke.

Hostess with a hostess. That might be a joke, but look at the other ones. The other ones are a joke. Oh, this is like when Tom Brady's big jacket was viral and then everybody started making like bigger and bigger jackets. And it's like at some point you forget the original.

I'm seeing a lot of angles. The non-wind-aged 40 is still an impressive number. That's what I'll say about Christopher Nolan's butt. I'm seeing a lot of angles on this butt too. Yeah. Good for him. I didn't realize. He got a donk.

Oh, that is. And I kicked it. It is substantial. And you kicked that donk. You kicked that donk right into the Pacific ocean. Thanks mom. What's that? Thanks mom.

I want to thank your mother for a butt like that. Thanks mom. Oh, okay. All right. Okay. That was a very deep cut. Yeah,

it was good. I didn't even need to necessarily say it out loud. I was thinking, yeah, that's what I thought originally. I was like, he didn't know he said that out loud. I thought it, I was like, say it out loud. I was thinking. Yeah, that's what I thought originally. I was like, he didn't know he said that out loud. I thought it.

I was like, say it out loud. And I was like, no one's going to get it. This all happened in a split second. I said it out loud. Nobody got it. And you predicted the future just now. Thanks, mom. Thanks.

It was funny. It was like a little bit of a brain teaser. You know what I mean? It was like, why is Sean saying thanks, mom, right now? 90 seconds on the clock. I wouldn't have got there. Me neither. I bet one of you would have. Somebody would have figured it out. 90 seconds on the clock. I wouldn't have got there. Me neither. I bet one of you would have. Somebody would have figured it out.

It would have taken a while. Ice? What? Ice griffin. Would you have gotten it? No, no, no. Certainly not. I don't think I've ever seen any of the-

What air horns over the whole thing. Air horn the whole thing. I think leave it in. Now, we are gathered here today not to talk about Christopher Maloney's butt, or- Oh, what? Sounds like we were for a minute. Though it in. Now, we're gathered here today not to talk about Christopher Maloney's butt or what? Sounds like it is extremely justified. Katie Nolan's champion performance on Celebrity Jeopardy. Champion performance.

We couldn't be prouder of you. We're not even here to talk about how it is November, though it is November. You asked for it. You got it. It's the best month of the year. Not because of the turkey, not because of the gravy, but because of the ham. We got Katie.

There it is. There it is. Give me a show in 1962. Give me, give me a light comedy show in 1962. Oh my God. The suits, the alcoholism,

fucking crush it Smoking cigs on TV Cig and scotch in the same hand On television Come on dude They were really living back then We're just getting it done Stay tuned for Ravi Shankar

We are here to fantasy draft in honor in fact Of your Jeopardy Domination Words that start with the letter Q What is a quince? Fantasy draft in honor, in fact, of your Jeopardy domination. Words that start with the letter Q. What is a quince? Come on. Goddamn right.

Come on. I hope she's doing okay. I think she is. I used to follow her on Instagram. She must be doing all right, right? I think she's doing all right. I think she's happy. If you don't understand the connection, what are you doing listening to All Fantasy Everything? Get out.

I don't really see how you would. Get out. In the motion picture, in the White Man Can't Jump original, although I haven't seen the remake, is there a Jeopardy subplot in the remake? There's not. No, he could have used it.

There's nothing about the remake other than it's called White Man Can't Jump. It's like nothing's the same. I don't even know. I heard a lot of it's good. I never watched it. But right after it came out, I heard a lot of people being like, you got to just give it a chance. It's actually not that bad.

That was LeBron texting you, though. It was LeBron saying. You're right. Shoot. That's right. I didn't save his number in my phone. So I always forget. I'm like like who is this

it's LeBron stupid LeBron definitely was written by old guys let's just say that LeBron's text to you or just him

like three weeks after a movie comes out saying like hey I saw an advanced screening of this movie it's gonna be really good but after a critical consensus has been reached

that was a long way to go I did like House Party though and a lot of people railroaded me for it, but I did like House Party. I haven't seen any of these Spring Hill remakes. Oh, I liked it from back when they had that Star Show. Their Star Show was, I can't remember what it was called, but it was very good.

No new movies until I finish Citizen Kane, which I'm only a half hour into right now. There you go. Treadmill time. White Men Can't Jump. In there, there's a subplot. Rosie Perez going on Jeopardy, studying for the letter Q.

Katie suggested we draft words. Q Foods. Q Foods. Q Foods. Pardon me. Pardon me. Q Foods. Katie Nolan suggested we draft words

starting with a letter. It was only natural. In light, again, of the Jeopardy! domination, that we draft words to start with the letter Q. Not just foods. All words. Now, the way we determine the order of this draft is through...

I have, like, better headphones now, so I feel tempted not to scream so much. You got new headphones, did you? I borrowed Dana's headphones. They're nice. They don't stick out too far. Sony MDRs. Yeah, I was going to say. I'm in the game, too, baby. Still got these. They're nice. They don't stick out too far. Sony MDRs. Yeah, I was going to say.

I'm in the game too, baby. Look at these. I'm wearing earbuds like a... Oh, Katie's wearing earbuds. Here we go. All right, good. I'm bringing it decidedly. Some of us take it seriously.

It's no big deal. You can't call earbuds cans. And I like throwing cans on. I was born... I'm just holding my mic like a lunatic why don't you do an episode from the treadmill I guess it would be really loud it'd be so loud

that thing is loud also you gotta turn down Patch Adams that he's playing in the background right now it's Citizen Kane oh shit Katie Katie Katie just changed there we go they're so big though right now it's citizen kane oh shit katie now katie just changed big there we go they're so big though yeah you look so professional why are they so giant

because the bigger they are the more money you're getting paid baby oh that's right that's right thank you thank you you're right these are not comfortable they may come off the way though now the three of us are wearing cans i don't have the option These are not comfortable. They may come off. The way... Now the three of us are wearing cans. I don't have the option. I'm sorry. Put a smoke alarm up on my ears. The way...

The way we determine the order of this draft is through a rollicking game of rock, paper, scissors. Played here over audio, but also available on video on the All Fantasy Everything Patreon. if you donate to the afp patreon now you can get a tote bag and a 16 disc set of stravinsky's orchestras performed live at the melbourne opera house we have one of those we have one of those somebody can get that we opened it we're missing four of the discs and the tote bag is covered in ranch.

It's still available. Yeah, you can get it. All right, here we go. We throw on shoot. Have you ever had a tote bag for more than three months? No. They give them sometimes, and you're like, ah. I've had tote bags for decades.

Really? I must be the opposite. I can't get rid of them. We have so many tote bags. I can't. They're gone. Same have so many tote bags. I can't. They're gone. Same with those reusable grocery bags they give you now. Those plastic-y, one-time-use bags.

They're multiple-use. But if you keep getting your groceries delivered because you're lazy, then they keep bringing them in bags. I have a million of those bags. You know what's funny? I have a hundred safeway plastic bags under my sink for some reason. I think humans have that in our genes to just keep bags. We hold on to bags. Something in my head is like they're going to retain value

and or structure. It's growing up broke, man. You grow up broke, you hang on to stuff. I mean, it's just how it goes. Not tote bags. I never saw a tote bag until I got on TV. You don't want to see an empty bag if you grow up broke. You get sick of looking at empty bags, so you throw them away. I guess, man.

I fucking... They give them to me at every festival and every festival. Yeah. Some of them doesn't even leave the hotel room. Sometimes, like, you're packing up and you're like, maybe I just... Uh-huh. Sorry, 10,000 laughs. Even though that was a very fun festival.

Sorry, we're not that we would have been there just last weekend at the time of this recording. Well, I had to go to Missouri. Can I ask while we're here? Is this the first one of November? I think it's the second. Yeah, that's what I thought too. You said it was November.

It made me think that you thought it was the first time. Last week's is the first episode? Yes, it is. I'm so bad at this. Isaac is more qualified, but I think, yeah, last week. Yeah, yeah. I'm doing a bad job of hosting. No, no, no.

Ian, please, no. I said welcome to November. That's okay. Nobody's going to notice. No one's going to care. Isaac, will you put the word, I'm going to say the word back in ISO right now? Say it like six different ways. Completely out of place.

All right, here we go. Or we can just use this as the first episode. We are weeks away. No. No, I don't like lying. Let's roll the room tone now. I'm going to say,

I'm going to give you some options. Sure, sure, sure. I'm going to give you some options for back. Back. Back. Back. Back. Back. That's Back. Back.

That's the one. Use that Dracula one. B-Y-O-K. Okay. Let me get an alt. Let me get a couple more alts, actually, where you sound scared because it is just after Halloween.

Oh, that's right. It was just Halloween. Back. Back. Back. Back. I love that. I love that. Thank you very much. I love that I love that thank you very much I hated that actually

if we're voting I did not like that this is not a democracy Katie Nolan okay all right well then let me shut up let me shut up and all hail the king

I'm the producer here why don't you give us some scared backs Katie yeah give me some give me some alts Katie it helps if you make your face scared back

oh wow okay back okay Meryl Streep she looked my dog Give me some malts, Katie. It helps if you make your face scared. Back. Oh, wow. Okay. Back. Okay, Meryl Streep. She looked my dog's face. She did a really good job. Oh, wow. That was really good.

I was going for a more awkward. If I try, I try hard. I was going for a more Scooby-Doo vibe. I didn't realize we were going like Blumhouse. So I apologize. Okay, well, and you know, I did. 824 listens. I almost got a full snot down

so I could do that. Blair Witch. Remember when we thought Blair Witch was real? Anyways, we were playing Rock, Paper, Scissors. I thought it was real for a long time. People don't realize that. Because the internet wasn't around yet. That's when we just had to talk about it.

Kids don't even realize Titanic is real. So they're like, oh, don't spoil the movie. And you're like, no, that really happened. You think kids are talking about Titanic, Katie? Yeah. I think it's a timeless love story, David. I think that you think that. I think so, too.

I cry every time I see it. I bet I've seen Titanic a hundred times. I think that you both think that. Yeah. I've seen Titanic twice. I have not revisited it. Let's be honest. It's pretty mid. I love Titanic. I've seen Titanic twice. I have not revisited it. Let's be honest. It's pretty mid.

I love Titanic. It's like, okay. I haven't seen it in a while, so I'm not going to like fight to the death for it. I just think you're being disrespectful for no reason. I saw it a month ago. I think it's great. I'm just saying that it's not a very good bet. When you triangulate near, far, and wherever you are, you land at mid.

That's so true. I thought it was mid when it came out. I remember seeing it and being like, this is going to suck. Now your flamethrowers are just on high and I don't understand why and what I've done. I'm just telling you guys, the movie kind of sucks. If we're practicing radical honesty.

They were boobs. That's exactly what I was going to say. And it still sucked. There were full boobs. And it still sucked. I don't know, man. 11-year-old me, sad boobs.

No, I don't know. I still said this shit is lacking. They were some art museum ass boobs. I mean, it't know. I still said this shit is wacky. They were some art museum-ass boobs. I mean, it was awesome, but they were definitely... It's true. But the hand in the car on the window that didn't... Yeah, I mean, that was sexy. That was kind of a thing.

The boobs were definitely like... It grossed me out. I didn't like that. It grossed me out. It still does. The boobs? The hand on the car window. Why?

I don't like the condensation. I don't like... I don't like wetness. What? Wow. I don't... What? I I don't like wetness What? I don't I'm not going to dig any deeper into this I just like wet shit I don't like soup Runny stuff grosses me out

We've talked about this, runny stuff grosses me out I don't like sweat, I don't like soup I don't like wet stuff That's why you like trash food Nobody likes the word moist. Yeah, I like dry food. Nobody likes the word moist. That's what I'm saying.

That's a terrible opinion. Food is best wet. I think we can all agree. See, that even made me want to try heat a little bit. Yeah, that's, you're a crazy person. I don't, I, okay. You don't like wet food? I just don't like wet food.

I'll eat it and I agree that it's good. Melted cheese? Casseroles? All the best food is wet. I wouldn't call like wet food. I'll eat it and I agree that it's good. Melted cheese? Casseroles? All the best food is wet. I wouldn't call melted cheese wet. Even those pepperoni sticks you like are wet. Somehow. Wait, are you using wet like the kids do it?

Like they're dope? They're wet? I do mean it like that. That's a wet lipstick? But I'm not meaning it like that. You're not meaning it like that? You said it like such an adult. No, I'm not meaning it like that.

Well, I do mean it like that, but that's not the main way I mean it. Wet. Any type of meat. Wet. No, I wouldn't say meats are wet. I'd say like pasta. I'd say a burrito. Well, then you don't know what wet means.

A burrito with like runny stuff at the bottom of the wrap. That's wet to me. Or like. There's a whole wet style burrito. Soggy is the word you're looking for. Soggy. Soggy would sum it up better. Okay, and so now back to what we were talking about, which was the window scene in the car

in Titanic. That wasn't soggy. It was just hot. It seemed a little soggy. It was hot. I don't like it. Have you... Well, you have a kid, so... So gross, man. This isn't... Were you asking me if he's had sex before? Yeah. We went through IVF, so... Apparently different than we all do try a friction

a very frictiony running a most frictiony rutting Sean conceived child through a most frictiony

rutting see now that grosses me out a lot worse than a wet hand Sean you're not into like a runny yoke the greatest Oh, it's friction-y rotting. See, now that grosses me out. Yolks? A lot worse than a wet hand. Yolks, Sean, you're not into like a runny yolk? The greatest thing about bread? Runny yolk cracked over like a piece of toast?

Do you not like sauce? But you love hot sauce. I do. You'll douse everything in that? That's what? You don't make sense. You're just a conundrum. I don't know what to tell you, man.

But I'll tell you, like, he's like a Jackson Pollock. It's all over the place. You're like, what is this? And then you look at'll tell you, like, he's like a Jackson Pollock. It's all over the place. You're like, what is this? And then you look at it, you're like, it's beautiful. It's beautiful. But then you're like, maybe it's bad. And it belongs in a museum. Yeah, maybe.

All it takes is one person going, is it bad? To go, oh, shit, is it? Oh, no. That's me with Titanic and you guys. All right, well. I'm that one person. Rock, paper, scissors. Sean, I don't think you're Titanic.

I think you're Tombstone. We shoot on, I am Tombstone. Tombstone's wet how the kids are saying it. It's wet. I don't even know if the kids... Damn it. Did they stop fucking saying wet already? Who told you they were saying that?

They really started saying wet. I thought wet was like a basketball specific thing. Oh, is it not? Yeah, like a wet jumper. It bled into everything else. Because it's so wet. It bled into everything else. Where are you meeting these kids you're

talking about? At the skateboard park, David. Are they talking to you like a kid or like a dad? They're talking to each other, and I got ears. And you're over there? Yeah. I'm next to them. You're undercover? They'll be like, my guy, that was a wet tray flip. And I'm like, okay. They're talking to each other.

My guy. Friend. 41-year-old over there. 42? 42. And by the time this comes out, I'll be 42. By the time this comes out. Gorgeous. My guy. That 42-year-old over there is eavesdropping on our conversation.

No, they say eavesdropping. They don't get it. They don't know what's going on. They're idiots. Let's use some weird words and make them think this is how we talk. Bro, that switch flip was pterodactyl bones, dog. I wouldn't put it past him. You could say that and they'd be like, thank bro.

Maybe I will. Shoot on three? Or what do we do? The way we determine the order of this draft is through a pterodactyl bones game of rock, paper, scissors. And we throw on shoot. Here we go. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. Oh, hey. Wow, Sean wins. Look at that. scissors and we throw on shoot here we go rock paper scissors shit oh hey wow sean wins look at that a natural victory a scissors versus two papers uh chandre mm-hmm chandre yagodala it

is incumbent upon you to determine the order of today's draft pretty soon before you do that i will remind you it is a serpentine draft. And what is that? That's a great question. It's like frosting a toaster strudel. Hey! If you've,

they still make toaster strudels, yeah? Don't they? Yeah. If you don't know what a toaster strudel is, go get your hands on it. If you don't know,

we don't know. That's a you know thing. That is, you would be the first one You two don't know what a toaster strudel is? Well, no, we know what they are, but, but do they still make them?

You have a kid, and you would probably still like eat a hell of a toaster strudel. Oh, that's what you're talking about. If I don't know, you don't know. Yeah. I'm going to look. I'll check today. I bet they do. I don't even eat breakfast, really.

I don't either. I have cereal now sometimes. We grew up in a Pop-Tart house. I share it with Maxine. We watch Gabby's Dollhouse at like 7 in the morning. That was also a Pop-Tart house. Were you guys at toaster strudel houses? We were at toaster strudel. There Dollhouse at like 7 in the morning. That was also a Pop-Tart house. Were you guys at Toaster Strudel houses? We were at Toaster Strudel.

There's a lot of kicks in the crib. On the 1st and the 15th, I feel like we were at Toaster Strudel house. Right, exactly. Toaster Strudel was big dough. We also became a Hot Pocket Breakfast House. Oh, no. Yeah. I loved Hot Pockets for a minute.

I went through a phase. The meatball ones. Oh, so good. Age old. They're bad for you, but they're good. I'm not going to say. The ham and cheese ones made me want to puke. That makes me want to die. Still makes me want to puke. Really? A hot

cold cut isn't. I'll tell you what you do. Get a ham and cheese Hot Pocket, savor a bottle of sriracha or of Cholula and then pour the whole thing on there. Yeah, Sean, sounds real wet. Yeah. Yeah, sounds moist. 19 hard Mountain Dews,

so who gives a rip, baby? So if you're frosting a toaster strudel, they give you a little frosting packet. You start at the bottom, you go to the left, and then you go up a little bit. You go to the right, you go up a little bit.

Or you start at the top. You start in the middle for all I care. You go up and to the left, and then up or down and to the right you go up a little where you start at the top you start in the middle for all i care uh you go up and to the left and then up or down and to the right uh sometimes you just do half you'll frost half of it and in that case i would start in the middle i'd go down to the bottom over to the right back up to the middle over to the right down to the bottom so you get double the frosting on half you know and then one half you muscle through with no frosting and then the right you know sometimes use two packets on one strudel and muscle through a whole strudel with no frosting.

Sure, sure. Just like that. Sure. That's how it is. That's how it is. It do be like that. It's going to be a jeopardy question. Basically, if you pick fourth in the first round,

you pick first in the second round. Hmm. Now, Sean, with that in mind. The only animal born with horns is a giraffe. Also, if that ever comes up, Katie. Yeah. Thank you. The only animal that can't jump, elephant.

Everything else can jump. Folks native to Nebraska call it exarban. Spelled backwards, exarban. What? If you're a Nebraska native, you call it exarban. It's Nebraska spelled backwards. So a lot of people in Nebraska call it exarbon that's it's Nebraska spelled backwards so a lot of people in Nebraska call it exarbon they do what what's going on is that how they pass the time in Nebraska go to Nebraska see what time it is be like say something about

a bunch of times I've been there like at least 12 times people in Nebraska call Nebraska exarbon as like a little speakeasy thing it's not like they say I'm The Exarbon State Fair? People in Nebraska call Nebraska Exarbon? As like a little speakeasy thing. It's not like they say I'm from Exarbon, but yeah. It's known, baby. I had no idea. Look at me like that. I had the weirdest deja vu just now. That is weird deja vu.

It's pretty much the weirdest. Sean Jordan, who is dressed like an adorable little fall pumpkin. I did it. We went to the pumpkin patch yesterday and I told Max to pick out some clothes for me to wear. This is what she picked out. She did great, man. I out of myself wearing the same shit two days in a row. That's okay.

We don't judge. I can't wait to go to the pumpkin patch. I just told somebody I was going to go to a haunted house and I immediately regretted it. Do you not like haunted houses? Not at all. Oh, baby, I love them. No. Oh, man. I don't like when they're good and I extra don't like when they're at all. Oh, baby, I love them. No. Oh, man. I don't like

when they're good, and I extra don't like when they're bad. Oh, my God, I love them. I have any good, bad, in between. I love them all. Fear is not like an emotion I court. Exactly. Exactly right.

It's got to be crazy to actually get scared in a haunted house. That's how scared I am most of the time. Yeah. To really get scared. Not like, bring it on. I'm naturally scared of all kinds of shit. I don't need to go and find some extra shit to be scared about. You're not wrong for liking us, Sean.

I'm going to go first. We're not mad. Oh, Sean's first. I'm going to go first. Oh. Katie second. David, then Ian. Hot corner.

Are we picking, are these like proper nouns? Anything starts with a Q? What? What did you just do with your face? Oh, I yawned. Oh, I caught the only end of it. So I just say, go. Yeah. It started out normal and then I like to end it out with a flare.

Sometimes you try to e-flat. How do you yawn? What... How do you yawn? What? How do you yawn? You just, you know, yawn. I don't know. I think it's just because I only looked up and saw the end.

I didn't see the fact that you were yawning. I just saw the like close out and I was like, what is he doing? You were doing a Scooby-Doo yawn and Katie does like a fucking like pretentious... I know, stop. I clench my teeth.

I always stretch now when I yawn too. It's just they're like. Katie does a pretentious 824 yawn. That's how she yawns. I'm sleepy. Your yawn was directed by Bo Burnham. My yawn is directed by Michael Bay and cocaine. No, I mean, You said Michael Bay. You can't have one without the other. Speaking of wet, Michael Bay shoots a wet movie

and not how the kids say it. Big wet movie. Everybody's wet in his movies. It's a wet movie. What's the time of day that he always shoots in? The magic hour. It's like a wet magic hour.

It's a wet dusky movie. Hour. It's a wet, dusky movie. Yes. Shot from the bottom. Wet, dusky. It's a wet, dusky, windy, rotating movie. Always shooting up. Yeah, somebody's going to get pregnant if we keep talking like this. Shooting up.

I'm going to pick, or wait, no, we got to do something. Sean Jordan has to. We have to go to a break? We do indeed have to go to a break. We do indeed have to go to a break. I didn't want to, I don't want to step on it. Sean Jordan is about to make the first pick in the letters that start with a letter Q all fantasy,

everything fantasy draft. But before that, a quick word from our sponsors. Well, we explained to Katie why David is wearing a hat that says race wars, 2023. We'll be right back. This episode of all fantasy.

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That's policygenius.com. Welcome back to All Fantasy Everything, already in progress. It's been about 45 minutes of banter so far, and we're about to make our first pick. Stand-up comedian Sean Jordan stands on the precipice of the first pick in the Letters That Start With a Letter Q fantasy draft. We wait with bated breath to see which direction... Words that start with the letter Q, fantasy draft. We wait with bated breath to see which direction. Words that start with the letter Q. What did I say?

You said letters that. We're drafting letters that start with the letter Q. It just got a lot more competitive. Whoa. Just one pick. Q. Now, P starts with a Q. All right, thanks for listening. We'll be back again next week.

A small P, a cap, a small lowercase P, if you're drunk, starts with a Q. If right, thanks for listening. We'll be back again next week. A small P, a cap, a small lowercase P, if you're drunk, starts with a Q. That's true. Are you saying that you get drunk and can't read? Can't write. I can't read sober, my friend, and I choose not to. They're one and the same. One hand washes the other with that one.

You can't read, though, by the way. People are coming up to me trying to ask me, like, you can't read. People have been doing it for years, have been hitting me up like, hey, man, it's cool if you can't read. And I'm like, and I end up back like, no, it is cool if you can't read. I'm saying I can, but it's like if someone can't. I read this message, you ding dong. Don't and can't.

That is why, what are you sending me a message for if you honestly think I can't read? Yeah, it's going to get lost. Sean don't read, but Sean can read. Sean can read. Yeah, I can read.. Yeah, it's gonna get lost. Sean don't read, but Sean can read. Sean can read. Yeah, I can read. Good job, Sean. I appreciate it. Thanks. We'll work on shapes and colors next week. Chandra Segovia, it's time for your first

pick. It's my favorite keyword. It's fun to say. I'm gonna pick quibble. Oh, that's a fun one. You do use that a lot. I like the word quibble. So it's's a fun one. You do use that a lot. I like the word Quibble. So it's in High Fidelity. There's a scene where, whatever, if you're not familiar with the movie, John Cusack's character is calling, trying to catch up with the old actress.

John Cusack, dude? Come on. John Cusack? John Cusack. Our patron saint. He gets the mother of one of his old exes, and he's like, hey, is she there or whatever? And she goes, and then they talk for a little bit. And he goes, I was her first boyfriend.

She goes, she actually married her first boyfriend. First and last. She is Mrs. Kevin Bannister. And he goes, it was actually me. I was her first boyfriend. She goes, Rob, I hate to quibble with you, but she married. And I just quibble.

It's just fun. It's worth it. Yeah. Oh, damn. It wasn't. I liked it. I liked it. No, I meant it. It was for sure worth it i meant

what i said that's why i just like quibble it's fun to say it's fun to if you can kind of shoehorn it into any conversation you know i don't want to sorry i don't want to quibble with you but i believe i ordered no onions right it's fun makes you sound like you're not an asshole if someone said not to quibble with you, I would. Yeah, I wonder if I would think they were more of an asshole. Kind of depends on the inflection, I guess, right? A big bird

just flew by my window and darkened the entire room for a moment. Wow. Was it a raven? I think it was. About once a day, a bird flies into one of my windows, either in the kitchen or the living room. We have big windows. Okay, that sums up. I've seen Lost. About once a day, a bird flies into one of my windows, either in the kitchen or the living room. We have big windows. That sums up.

About once a day, a bird will smash into the window. I believe that because I know you're a window watcher too. Yeah. I stare out the windows heavily. You be looking out those windows, man. Oh, yeah.

Sean's like a nosy neighbor in a sitcom from the 50s. Always peering out of those windows. We live in a cul-de-sac now. If I see a car that I have never seen, I'm part of the window. I'm like face up. You're not on Nextdoor, right?

No, I can't do it to myself. Good, good, good, good. That would tailspin me. I can't do it. I think that might radicalize you. I think you might be like at the next January 6th if you get on Nextdoor. Yeah, well, I skip every inauguration.

I skip. That's true. Yeah, I'm not going to be going this time. But I digress. Quibble. Fun Q word. Love saying it. I tried to challenge myself to spell all these the right way too.

Q-U-I-B-B-L-E. I believe so. Yeah. Yes, that's the book for me. Yeah, Quibble. Quibble. It's also what you feed your pets. It's not. It's close though. Quibbles and nips.

Quibbles and nips lean. Do you remember that Kibbles and Bits lean where all the dogs were like leaning? Oh, I thought they were both lean. No, they were very good at commercials. Yeah, Kibbles and bits, lean. Kibbles and bits, lean. And there were these dogs walking around, leaning to the side.

Literal. You know who else had good commercials? It was those Beggin' Strips. We have those. We have those because of the Beggin', Beggin', Beggin', Beggin', Beggin'! That might have started the bacon craze, man. That might have been like the ground floor of the bacon craze.

Is the ground floor of the bacon craze? I'd entertain the idea. Got in people's kitchen with it. Yeah, I'm not upset with it. I don't keep my dog treats in the kitchen, though. Is that not normal? Y'all ever eat a dog treat? On top of her crate?

Yeah, I went to junior high school. I've eaten a cat treat. I've eaten some wild shit, but I've never eaten a dog treat. Me neither. Yeah, no. But you thought about eating bacon. That's why you brought it up. Because it does some wild shit, but I've never eaten a dog treat. Me neither. Yeah. But you thought about eating bacon. That's why you brought it up because it does look like bacon and it smells like bacon. And it looks like bacon beef jerky.

It looks great. I've eaten a bacon strip. The whole thing. It's got a, it's got a, it's got a, the essence of bacon. I'm upset. This is upsetting. It hurts my feelings. Bad mission, the way he said it.

I've eaten a bacon strip. The essence of bacon. They're not small. You've eaten the whole thing? I don't know that I ate the whole thing. I definitely took a mouthful. That sounds like Kevin Bacon's autobiography, The Essence of Bacon. Oh, I thought you said taking a mouthful.

What do I not know about Kevin Bacon? Stop talking about that horny stuff a while ago with the wet talk but Katie you've at least had a bite of a bacon strip right? no I don't even like jerky so I wouldn't even when it's for humans I'm like no thanks this is not for me is it a meat thing or a dry thing

yeah I don't like cold cuts and I don't really like jerky we know I don't like cold cuts. And I don't really like jerky. I like meat. We know you don't like cold cuts because you scowled at our... I didn't scowl. I gagged probably.

And it wasn't performative. It was because that's genuinely the reaction that it takes out of me. It's like... She was not wrong. None of us got sick from that. It was sweaty. It was all wet.

And you guys were like slapping it. And you say you don't like condensation and wet stuff, Sean. I also never said I was picky. I'm just, I like what I like. You are picky. I couldn't have been a wetter set of cold cuts, dude. A wetter set of cold cuts has not existed on the planet Earth. Katie's just back there like, you guys aren't going to eat that.

And we're all holding it like, I mean, yeah. And everybody was okay? Nobody got sick? This is my second sandwich. I don't think we got sick from that. It could have been the days on the road and the general behavior, but I don't think the wet meat. I think one canceled out

the other. I think the days of chugging tequila and whiskey made it so that we couldn't get sick from whatever was happening to those cold cuts. You become impervious to bar food. It's like Keith Richards not going to the dentist for 40 years. The cheese was sweatier than the cold cuts. Go on. One time Dan and I got back from a group dinner and he got sick

from it, like mild food poisoning sick and I didn't and we had all eaten the same thing and he made the argument and I'm curious to know if this is how it really works that because he didn't drink he didn't have the alcohol to like kill the germs and so that's why

he would get sick and I wouldn't and I was like is that how it works? As an amateur doctor I would say yes. Yeah. As soon as he said it

I'm like that sounds like it could be how it works. It feels real to me. But I didn't know if I was like oh that kind of sounds like an argument to drink. If somebody said it to me

the right way I would believe it. Last time I checked the podcast analytics and Isaac, correct me if I'm wrong, 60,000 doctors listen to this every week. So if you're one of them, please feel free to... Please reach out. I bet there's a doctor. I've gotten messages

from dentists and physical therapists. There's got to be a doctor. I met a doctor who listens to us in Toronto, Canada. Now, I don't know what the... Yeah, but is it medicine up there? Yeah. I know that's exactly the question. I'm not sure.

A lot of people call it witchcraft. Yeah. Take the hair of a moose and throw a Molson on it. Call me in five days. It's a type of nuts and berries from a forest situation. No, but Canadian doctor hit me up. Let us know if that's true Canadian doc

Canadian doctor Canadian doc let us know about this food poisoning theory Katie Nolan it's time for your first pick yeah

in the letters that start with the letter Q come on yeah what a silly what a silly event from earlier I was so silly of you

when you said that remember that that was silly with the pick my first pick I'm going to take the letter the word Q not to confuse everybody further Q-U-E-U-E like all the wine Remember that. That was silly. With the pick, my first pick, I'm going to take the word cue.

Not to confuse everybody further. Cue, U-E, U-E. Like a line over there. Because what a funny word. It's just a cue and then just mayhem of vowels. It really is. Just nothing but vowels. Woo, woo. It's like U-E, U-E.

Without the cue, that word would be very hard to say. I hate it when you read it and it says cueing and you're like, no. No. Is it U-E-U-E-I-N-G when it's cueing? That's crazy. Is the second E there or did they get rid of it? No. It's Q-U-E-U-I-N-G.

Yeah. That's the kind of word that sucks. You can only flex like that when you invented the language. Yeah. Who is this for? Yeah. Where did it come from?

I feel like my childhood, that word was not around. And I feel like as I got older, I'm like, why are we saying Q? Since when is Q? Because when we were a kid, we didn't really know people who studied abroad. And that's a big, like, I brought this word back from England. Where people like to, like, sprinkle in their conversation. Like, oh, is the Q over there? And it's like big, like, I brought this word back from England where people like to, like, sprinkle a new conversation. Like, oh, is the Q over there? And it's like, the line's over there.

So, pool cue is Q-U-E, right? Or C-U-E. Pool cue is C-U-E, right? Yeah. How do you cue someone? Is that C-U-E? Same thing, C-U-E. This is fun. But like a Netflix cue. C-U-E. That's the line. Because it's a list.

It's a line. Oh, that's what this queue is. I bet the Netflix queue is also one of the first times people heard about that. I think that's probably a huge jump in that word. Because I remember when I worked at the Netflix call center, people would call in and they'd be like, I don't know what a queue is, but I have it in my queue. They were doing that shit at Hulu too.

Eight years later, by the way. So if I'm in line at the airport, am I in, am I in cue? You're in a cue. You're in a cue. You're cueing. Patrick cueing? Patrick cueing, dude. There we go. Patrick cueing.

There we go. Rarely do I make myself giggle in such a way. And I just did. So I'm happy about it. I don't want to, I don't want to quibble with you, but I feel like you do it quite a bit. Yeah, I crack myself up all the time. Rarely do I make myself giggle in such a way.

Wonderful. Proceed with the podcast. Citizen Kane shit, dude. I'm going to talk like Citizen Kane. What's Charles Francis Kane? What's his name? Whatever. I'm the one watching.

I should know. Q. Q-U-E-U-E. Q-U-E-U-E. Q-U-E-U-E. I'm the one watching. I should know. Q. Q-U-E-U-E. Q-U-E-U-E. Quayway. Quayway. Quayway. Quayway.

No, it's a dank one for sure. I take Quayway. Quayway. Pardon me, sir. Is this where you... Excuse me, sir. I Quaywayed all over the bathroom and I don't have any dollars to tip,

but I'm sorry. There's a Quay-way mess in there. Tip was what you were thinking to give. I was thinking about a bathroom attendant. Oh. Have you ever tipped a bathroom attendant? Hell yeah. Yeah?

Yeah. Where? In a bathroom. Yeah, when you have money on you. Got me. They have one at the Galleria at the Americana. There's a bathroom attendant and like, I don't know, it's really the only one

I've ever seen. I feel like if you take any of his wares, you're required to tip. Yeah, some aquavalva. If you take some gum, a couple spritzes of cologne, a loose cigarette. Sometimes they feel valuable. Other times they just feel like they're there to watch you pee. Yeah. Yeah, it's 50-50.

are you surveilling or are you attending? It's tough to know. they will jam a bathroom attendant into a bathroom that does not have the room for it. No business having one. Pretty wild.

That's always the worst. Like, if he's standing there, if he's like pretty close to a stall, I don't need that bathroom for six minimum to have a bathroom

for his own sake too because then you feel bad you're like look I'm in the room where I'm supposed to do the thing this is your office you go blow it up also I don't want to poop in there

if you're just going to be in there exactly it's not nice then I have to sit with it and I know what I did and now I'm going to be like yeah I'm going to do some breakfast where else would they want me to

where else do you want me to do this? If not in here, this is where I'm supposed to do this. You're dressed too nice to smell my poop all day. Yeah, get out. You've created I Know What You Did Last Summer character for you pooping. And I don't like that. This guy's going to track me down. What do you want from me?

You pooped in that room I was working in. Let's just from now on treat the bathrooms like a Deborah Cox song. How did you get here? Nobody's supposed to be here. You ever get busted pooping before a show at a club? Like you go in and you have

to poop and then somebody, it's before the whole thing even started. And then the manager person says, this guy's pooping in here. Everybody. I always feel like I'm going to get up and they'll be like, hey, that guy pooped earlier. He's not funny. I feel like I'm going to get up and they'll be like, hey, that guy pooped earlier. He's not funny. I hate it when you're headlining now because it'll be like

somebody who bought tickets to see you and you come out of the shitter. He's like, oh, hey. And you're like, hi. Man, couldn't we just wait

till after to talk instead of right after I took a dump? You got to be like, I just, I just look like him. I'm not him. It's gonna be a great show. I've planned my day in such a way where

I took a shit 10 minutes before the show started, where I was at the hotel all day long. We should be packing poop disguises. Oh my god. That's so smart. Like a mustache on top of my mustache? Yeah, a blonde one. A top hat?

I'll go double stache poops. I'll just come out with no pants on? Well, the headliner's going to be wearing pants, so it can't be me. It couldn't be him. You said, that guy, oh, that guy pooped. He's not funny. I think that it's... Oh, ew, that's the guy who pooped. And then everybody points and goes, ew.

Yeah. You walk up, take the microphone in your hand, and then like somebody three rows back from the stage is like, hey, everybody. I saw this guy poop earlier. Pooper, pooper. Do they start throwing tomatoes at you? What's our name? I'm trying to leave the man, and I'm scared. You have 45 minutes left.

Get back out there. I don't care if you poop scared. You have 45 minutes left. Get back out there. I don't care if you pooped. You got a 50 hour. See, this sounds terrifying. Just like you filled our toilet. Damn. With your poop. The manager's in on it.

You know where I hate pooping is the movies. I don't think I've pooped at the movies. I don't know that I have either. I mean, because you're missing so much of the movie or because yeah I just want to see that terrible John Washington movie and I pooped oh no it's a bad

it sucked the commander or something or the creator oh dude it's supposed to be Dink I thought it sucked well he also thought Titanic sucked guys so take it with a grain of salt yeah cause I'm cool. Are Kate Winslet's boobs in the creator?

There are no boobs. Oh, no. It's just like a lot of, as a writer, you're going to hate it. There's a lot of plot stuff where you're like, oh, this is stupid. What about as like a dad who really kind of likes. You're going to love it. Robots? Elementary.

Dad's following a plot. Dad's love to take a nap in a movie I it's big I will say that that's why I went to see it because I like to see big movies

alright I'm sold in the theaters what a guy who's chosen to watch Citizen Kane in half hour increments on the treadmill at 12

at midnight enjoy it's got you're out at midnight I'm gonna tell you the truth I JT. You don't work out at midnight? I'm going to tell you the truth. I don't know what to make of this. What? Like, I know it because it's Sean,

but if you told me somebody else did that, I would be like, I don't know what this means. That's the, you're not supposed to do that, Sean. I do. Young Maxine goes to bed. After shows,

if I get home, I have all this energy and so I just walk. I just walk on the treadmill. Okay. There's nothing to do with it. You're all hyped up. I get it. I get it. I just feel like my whole life, I've been told you're supposed to do it

in the morning. Jamie Foxx worked out at night in any given Sunday, and you see how that worked out. The freaks work out at night. You're looking special ready, Sean. The skin is glowing. you look great cheapos papa me and steven willie beeman keep the ladies cold creaming because we work out at night

oh no isaac air horns over ian saying oh no i want everyone to know that he said cold creaming he did in a commercial why was it cold yeah i don't know man i think it's like cold maybe he meant cold cream at night maybe it's like cold chilling. Maybe he meant cold cream at night. Maybe he's like cold creaming. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, you're cold creaming. Keeping his skin. It's doing skincare. To his credit, Jamie Foxx really was letting us know he could sing that whole time.

He's one of our most talented people. He never wanted us to forget. Oh, yeah, he could do anything. I think he could do anything. He's really good at all of it. If he played Batman, Batman would have had a musical number. You know what I mean? Or he would have been driving the Batmobile singing along to something.

That was like Zooey Deschanel for a while in her movies. She was like, and by the way, I sing in kind of a funny, beautiful way. Every time. And you were like, got it. I also sing. That's my Zooey Deschanel. That's really good. That's really good stuff.

It's really good, right? It's like, it's Kermit adjacent. And I like that. I can do a little bit of a Kermit. A little bit. Let's hear it. Give me something to say And I like that. I can do a little bit of a Kermit. A little bit. Let's hear it. Give me something to say. These pretzels are making me thirsty.

Hi, home. These pretzels are making me thirsty. That's not bad. Pretty good. A little bit. That ain't bad. Now do it like the lead singer of System of a Down. Wake up.

Wait, what does he say? I don't really know. Why'd you leave your makeup on the table? Why'd you leave your makeup on the table? Why'd you leave your makeup on the table? You wanted to. I'm losing it. You wanted to. Tom Hanks.

Why'd you leave the makeup on the table? All right, we need to move on with the podcast. That didn't work for me. It didn't work for anybody. Okay. I felt bad. I feel bad. No, definitely don't.

I feel like the audience knows I pooped. No. They know you pooped. It's not funny. I felt bad. I feel bad. No, definitely don't. I feel like the audience knows I pooped. No. They know you pooped. They're like, this guy pooped. This guy pooped. I'll tell you.

This guy poops. Saturday, if you want to catch me pooping, you hang out in the bathroom before that Saturday first show. That's when you're going to get me. Hop in the queue. Hop in the queue for the bathroom.

I try to do everything I can to not poop at the club. I do too. Especially because like, do you ever have it where the green room is hella packed and everybody's in there and you're like, well, if I shit in there now, everybody's gonna know.

The bathroom, if it was empty, if it was just you, the bathroom would be the most convenient thing in the world. But when there's like eight people in there and it's... I don't even like peeing. It's five feet from where you're sitting. Stop listening to my stream. They're drawing conclusions from the strength of my pee stream.

Right. Yeah. From the, I, I will, I only, I only pee strong. Yeah.

Yes. I bring my wee game. You get jumped outside of the bathroom. If they hear a wee, a weak pee, anything could happen after that. I will not allow it. I dribble at home,

but that's the only place. They're calling their buddies. They're like, we got a weak peer at the club. Yeah. God took a piss. It sounded like Morse code. We got to jack him. Take everything. David, time for your first pick. We're going slow. That's right. Quip.

I think there's not a lot of words that sound exactly like the action that they represent. And I think that Quip is perfect it's just that it's quick it's sharp it's biting i think i love it i love it it's an esoteric onomatopoeia almost you know wow yeah definitely those two things you said that sounds like your rap name like your high school middle school rap name who uses way too many words. It's a white guy with dreadlocks

for sure. I'm a good rapper because I said the word loquacious. Esoteric onomatopoeia. She got a big booty, so I call her Big Booty. Now that's a good rapper. That's right. And now he owns a series of different businesses in the Atlanta area that I find out about

from his Instagram every day. And at least two of them chains. I heard that. Come on. We all heard that. I'm going to give you a million dollars. Man. There she goes.

A million dollars. There she goes. I really liked it. Man. I don't know what to say. Someone's got to say something else. Isaac, say something else Isaac say something It's like an ad read It could be an ad read too

It's a popular podcast toothbrush Oh yeah I believe they sponsored our podcast before right? Have they recently? What happened? Why'd they take back their money? They started sucking shit once they stopped That's what happened Damn Let's not burn down any bridges yet Ah fuck them recently? What happened? Why'd they take back their money? They started sucking shit once they stopped.

That's what happened. Let's not burn down any bridges yet. Ah, fuck them. And while we're at it, all birds, why don't you sit down? Let's have a talk. I'm just kidding.

Fucking. Stamps.com. The History Channel. What does 2 Chainz own? I don't know. What if we were sponsored by the History Channel?

2 Chainz, he owns a, 2 Chainz owns like a strip club and a bar restaurant in the Atlanta area called Esco Bar. Same venue? No, different venues. Oh, I like that. And he's looking to expand Esco Bar National.

I think there might be one in other parts of the South. Is this like the 40-40 club? Like you can go to it at LaGuardia? RIP. Yeah. But he's starting like, he's starting real. 40-40 clubs at LaGuardia? Or they go to it at LaGuardia? RIP. Yeah. But he's starting like, he's starting real. 4040 Club's at LaGuardia?

Or they have a place at LaGuardia? Now it's gone completely so I don't even think it's anywhere. There was one in the airport. Now I gotta look it up. Quip.

Because, like, 2 Chainz is like, because he owns these places, you can see, like on his Instagram it's just like, he's advertising

a $5 happy hour at the Peter Street Esco bar. Oh, that's great yeah lighting something it is atlanta it's still there though it's not oh no it's it seems like it's doing well but like this this giant rapper is just like i'm putting up the five dollar uh happy hour ad on my Instagram. Question. Could you smoke weed out of a hookah? Yeah. It uses a shitload though. Yeah. You know, you get like one, you put a whole bowl

and you get like one hit. We did it with like a four person hookah once. That's the only way I ever smoked hookah before the whole hookah bar trend. It was for weed. Oh, really? We had our buddy.

So when those bars opened, you must have been like, what? People are just out here smoking. Yeah, I just smoke weed. You're like, what? That's what I thought for a long time.

Oh, it just tastes like pineapple. I was always very anti-hookah bar. And I remain. Yeah, I've never been to one. I used to walk by one every day in Glendale. I walked by it to and from work. Yeah, I've never been to one. I used to walk by one every day in Glendale. I walked by it to and from work. Well, they started popping like right when I was

18. So it was like a lot of like people like, you know, you can't go out, but you go out to the hookah bar. Always lounge actually I feel like is the better word. Yeah, hookah lounge I think is the better word. Yeah. Quip.

Quip. Quip. Boom. Isn't that. Yeah. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Boom. Is not a song. Quip. Quip. Quip.

Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip.

Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip.

Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip.

Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip.

Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip.

Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip.

Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip.

Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip.

Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip.

Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. Quip. nine head p.e oh yeah i was telling david about it the other day yeah it was by a man called saliva saliva that guy looks you want to talk about wet look up that dude from saliva he is that dude's hair looks wet all the time it's disgusting looking maybe right now it's wet changed his ways but yeah that dude used to look wet constantly dried Maybe he dried off. Somebody gave him a towel for Christmas. We all do in our old age, don't we?

We all dry out. Yeah. It's the collagen. We start losing collagen. Yeah. Yeah, we do. Time for my first pick. I'm going to be wet until the casket drops.

Bury me juicy, baby. When the casket hits the bottom, it's going to go. Yeah. Bury me juicy. There we go. Bury me juicy. That's the one. it's going to go. Bury me juicy. There we go. Bury me juicy. That's the one. That's really the one.

That's a good smoothie name. I'm going to go to Juice Stop and order a bury me juicy and just see what they give me. Oh, and it's berry, like B-E-R-R. That's fun. No, I really do this. This is good. I really do this.

Bury me juicy. Yeah, instead of showing me timbersury me Bury me juicy Yeah instead of Showing me timbers Oh bury me juicy Bury me juicy For my first Q word I'm going to take

Quintessential Yeah The quintessential Q word It's the quintessential Q word What a journey That takes you on

Sean you have to say it Sean I have to say it Yeah We all said it was The quintessential Q word And so I thought takes you on. Sean, you have to say it. Sean? I have to say it? Yeah. We all said it was the quintessential keyword, and so I thought it would be for the moments past. Go ahead. Go ahead, Ian.

What were you saying? U-I-N-T-E-S-S-E-N-T-I-A-L? Yes, sir. It's quint and essential. Yes. Yeah. Yeah, but I always fucked up the I-A and A-I and essential or anything else with an A-I in it.

But Sean, the I has to come. But E, but sure. I don't like AI either. The I has to come. I before A except after. No, it makes a different sound. It's either, if it's an A sound,

then the A comes first. If it's like, shuh, then it's the I first. I don't know, man. Okay. 13 years of teachers, I'm counting kindergarten in there.

They all try to tell me it didn't work. 15 if I count the two dalliances I had with going to college. Good use of dalliance. Thank you. Quintessential. IA and dalliance, by the way.

I wouldn't have known that. Guarantee. Yeah. Yeah. IA. Dalliance. Quintessential. It's just a real's a real, it's a real rollercoaster of a word. Uses every part of the mouth. It's fun. Quintessential.

It's fun. I like it. Where did it come from? Because I wonder if it ever meant like, because doesn't quint usually mean like five? Am I making that up? Yeah. So I wonder why. Well, that's something to Google later when I'm high on the couch.

Quintessential. Fruits, vegetables, breads, and grains. Right. Fats. Quinta for fifth. Tussert. Element. And then water.

Quint is fifth and essentia is Latin for element. So this word is the fifth element. Leloo Dallas Moodie Bass. We just blew this thing wild, man. Latin for element. So this word is the fifth element. Lilo Dallas multi-bass? We just blew this thing wide open. We just blew this thing wide open, dude. Whoa, the fifth element. This is big. Which means the quintessential Bruce

Willis performance is the fifth element. And Chris Tucker, I'd say. And Chris Tucker. Chris Tucker was good in that. He really killed it. It's the quintessential weird orange tank top with holes in it where you're like, why are people wearing that in the future? Is it white and her hair's orange or is it orange? I'm talking about what Bruce Willis is wearing, dude. He's wearing like a weird orange tank top.

Was that set in a year? Was that movie set in a year or was it just the future? 2004. They reached a certain part where they got afraid to put a year on it when they had flying cars because we were like, clearly we're not close.

So we'll just say sometime in the distant future. Remember the steam running out of that towards the end of the millennium? Yeah, they were like, we were just kidding. Yeah, 2000's coming and I don't think

it's going to be much different. Maybe it's going to be worse. And it just proves it to be. You know what's nice about the fifth element is like most sci-fi movies we were talking about this the other day I was talking about this the other day with Dana they wear kind of the same weird like creams and taupes

in the future you know what I mean like everybody kind of dresses like the empire and stuff like Star Wars it's like a very Star Wars centric dressing like in the future do you Wars. It's like a very Star Wars-centric dressing in the future. Do you not think fashion's going that way? I do think fashion's going that way. I earnestly do.

Everything's Helvetica. Everything's Helvetica. But the fifth element was just like, no, it's a fucking trombone solo. I do like that as well. People dress crazy. Lilo Dallas Multipass is wearing a bandaid. Bruce Willis is wearing what looks like a Halloween candy bag as a shirt.

The old man dressed crazy. Yeah. Yeah, that's a wild movie. Chris Tucker's dressed insane. He's got like that unicorn horn and made out of hair. That movie's awesome. Even like, is it Gary Oldman? It's awesome even like uh it's a gary oldman it's good yeah right the old man has that weird clear hair part and he's wearing like a crazy

yeah and he's like the tough guy in the movie like everyone in that movie like more we should we need more sci-fi where people are just like fashion icons the taupe rule book yeah let's just come up with the craziest shit we can think of. Less projections of the future where everybody is kowtowing to one thing. Yeah. Give the costume designer too much, like a legally inadvisable amount of acid

and just let them go to work. I want there to be too many colors. Yeah. Yeah. I want that to be a criticism. Quintessential. And I'll take it. It's fucking sitting right there. Especially now that to be a criticism. Quintessential. And I'll take it. It's fucking sitting right there. Especially now that we know Fifth Element. Yeah, yeah.

It's one of my favorite breakfast foods. Oh, no. I'm taking quiche. Quiche. Yeah. Foods that start with the letter Q. Q-U-I-C-H-E? That's right.

Sean, you're doing great. My buddy Baron said his drag name used to be Queche Ramirez because he thought quiche, the first time he saw it spelled out, he thought it was queche. So he'd call it queche when he was a kid. He'd order queche. Anyway. I never knew a kid to order a quiche in general.

Oh, Baron was never a kid. I don't think Baron has been an adult. To me, that sounds like French coochie. But that's just French coochie. But that's just me. Coochie. I can't do a French accent. I can't do it.

Would you like to come over to the crib and give me your coochie? The crib. The crib. Oh, my God. Would you like to come to the crib so I can get that coochie? Oh, my God. Would you like to come to the crib so I can get that kwichet?

There you go, cracking yourself up. Look at you. You love it. Can you imagine saying that to some girl? I mean, it's insane to think about. I couldn't imagine saying the crib. Now we know what it sounds like when Tony Parker's hitting on your wife. Man, me and Brett Berry just hanging out. I love a breakfast pie,

and that's all that quiche is, baby. It's an eggy breakfast pie, and you can sign me up for it any day of the week. Any day of the week? Any day of the week. You ever had a bad one? I don't have a job. I have.

I've had bad quiche. But I've had a lot more good quiche. Sometimes if they're too dry, no offense, Sean, but if they're too dry, I'm not really into them. Put some hot sauce on it. Are we not still doing

the coochie thing in our brains? Am I the only one having a great time right now? Every day. Every day. I'm the only one living. great time right now. Every day. I'm the only one living. The queeche is too dry. It has broccoli in it.

The queeche has broccoli in it. And I have a three-game road trip coming up. Please. Egg-based. We have to play the Milwaukee Bucks. They are egg-based. I play the Milwaukee Bucks They are egg based I like it with the flaky crust Anyways

Come on I had to do it I had to do it I can't think of one That's good, that's for the best I did a Q bar for this I liked it It's delicious, it's nutritious And I'm not being capricious I liked it. Quillen.

It's delicious. It's nutritious. And I'm not being capricious. I'd like a piece right now. Ooh, there we go, baby. Yeah, man. Greggie's Wedding, they had like six or seven quiches. We woke up and there were just so many quiches to choose from.

It was great. Six or seven quiches sounds like one of these A24 movies that Katie's doing her whispering in. Quiche? The nominees are. four movies that Katie's doing her whispering in. Keesh? The nominees are six or seven Keesh's. Killers of the Flower Moon. Keesh? For God's sake, it's David's turn. I'm going to take this to another country.

I'm going to say Quinceañera. That's David's turn. I'm going to take this to another country. I'm going to say quinceanera. Yeah, that's a good one. Come on. Now, that is a 15-year-old's birthday party, so I think we're going to need you to explain why you love it so much. I don't love you pretending like I love anything other than the word, Katie. Oh, okay.

I didn't know. It's just very fun to say. It really is. Also, I saw these kids doing a photo shoot for a quinceanera up the word, Katie. Oh, okay. I didn't know. It's just very fun to say. It really is. Also, I saw these kids doing a photo shoot for a quinceanera up the street, and I was like, damn. That does look cool. Yeah. Sean, you don't want to spell this one?

I've been to one. Q-U-I-N-C-I-N? No. With the N? No. No. It's a tough one. I'm saying N. It's got an N-year. Where I am saying N. It's got an N-year.

What's got two? Q-U-I-N-C. Q-U-I-N-C. I. No. E. E. Quince.

N. So E-N. No. I-E-R-A. Oh. It's E-A? Quinceanera. I don't think that's right.

Quinceanera. It better fucking be right. Quinceanera. Oh my God, you were right. He is right. I am wrong. Yeah. Quinceanera.

Quinceanera. Quinceanera. You've been to one, David? Yeah. Yeah. I always wanted to be asked to be in one when I was high school age. Is there a role? Yeah, there's people in it. Do boys have them too?

Yeah, I remember a buddy of mine, he was like, he always had to go to kinsei practice for like a week or something. I was like, I'm so jealous. I want to be in a kinsei. All I know is when you're driving through LA and you hear One of them's happening nearby. It looks like the most fun. Go to Griffith on a Saturday. It looks sick. Bouncy castles

for days. Yeah, Katie, maybe it's just a cool party. I wish I would have gone to one. It's the cooler version of a sweet 16 because I feel like 15 is the age right before you become too cool for all the stuff that you would have at a party. I thought you were going to say

right before you become 16. No, it feels like sweet 16s are like... Sweet 16s are like, we got to be cool. I don't want to hang out with my parents. But 15, you're like bouncy castle. I think you can still do a bouncy castle I bet there are some like military industrial quinceaneras

where like some rich dudes are like you know what I mean I bet there's some like communities where like people are fucking spending yeah oh I bet they blow it out sometimes with like a carving station yeah like the mayor has to have a quinceanera you know what I mean there's a quinceanera dress shop

at the mall that I get my steps in. I walk by it five times a week probably. Every time. It's one of the only stores. No, it's one of the only stores I always look at though. Like I always want to see what's going on. He's got his eye on a dress and one of these days he's going to snatch it up.

They look so fun. They're huge. Give Maxie the quinceanera. They're beautiful. I don't know if I can. I don't know if we can do that. You can do whatever you want. You could give her a bat mitzvah. What am I going to do? I don't know if I can. I don't know if we can do that. You can do whatever you want. You could give her a bat mitzvah.

What am I going to do? I don't know. Go to it. What would you do? She says, I don't know. Would you come to it if I gave it? If she learns Hebrew, I'm coming. No pictures, but yeah, I'll go.

I heard you say bat mitzvah. It's bat mitzvah, right? I said bat mitzvah. I said bat mitzvah. I thought you said bat mitzvah. I'll be attending in my poop disguise, but I'll be there. Is bot boy or is bar boy? Bot's girl, right?

Bot's girl. Bot is girl. And benai is twins. That's right. Twin mitzvahs? I've been to a benai mitzvah myself. Benai mitzvah. Benai mitzvah.

It's also when an Australian gets bar or bot mitzvahed. It's a benai mitzvah. It's also when an Australian gets borrowed by a mitzvah. It's a b'nai mitzvah. Are there a lot of the tribe down there? Australian Jews? Yeah. I mean, they got banks. Brother, I am not in this conversation. Damn. Right, everybody?

Nope. Yeah. All of a sudden, Katie can't find Myrtle. Oh, my dog. Oh, my. Sorry, guys. I see my dog. Shit, I got to go get Max from daycare, I think. Right?

I mean, they got bags. I just don't want to do this. Oh, Myrtle, don't get on that. No, no. Spit that out. Come to the crib. Give an Isaac an edit point 20 minutes ago Thank you very much for that

I don't know I don't know how many members Of my tribe The Jews The person who said They got banks In a satirical way I don't know

Me Jewish Ian Carmel 100% bar mitzvah And everything 100% banon mitzvah And everything I don't know how many Jews

There are there I was talking about Like river banks and stuff I mean you know Going to the river Hey guys I'm back know how many Jews there are there. I was talking about riverbanks and stuff. I mean, you know, going to the river. Hey guys, I'm back. Sorry, I was gone there for a minute. Whose turn is it? And that's why, if you look at the records,

none of them were in the Twin Towers. Katie, welcome back. Myrtle. Sorry, I got a phone. Myrtle, darn it. Yeah, good girl. See, really, we're having an interaction. Oh, Katie's back.

Even as far back as Shakespeare. If you read The Merchant of Venice. Quinceañera. Quinceañera. Quinceañera. Quinceañera. Great pick. Katie Nolan.

Time for your second pick. I'm taking quesadilla. Yes. Come on. And now I know you said that you're just taking the word and not the thing, but I'm going to take the thing on this. I want quesadilla. I got the thing.

Melty cheese in between tortillas. When you said your favorite breakfast food, I thought for sure you were going to say quesadilla. Excuse me? Say that other word you said again. Egg. No, no, no. You said melty cheese in between the tortillas.

Tortillas. I don't love it. That's why I blew right past it. You're the one who went back to look at more. I thought you were going to say a breakfast quesadilla, which is the best. Quesadilla, correct?

I love a brekkie. Yeah, that was the lead character on Living Single, I believe. I was Quesadilla back in my, when I was like an attorney and a DJ at night. Quesadilla. There we go. Whatever kind of dumb that was, it would get cut right through. It's like adult swim. I had a whole quesadilla era where I kind of was like,

burritos are too big. The burritos are too damn big. You're in a political movement. The burritos are too damn big, right? You have rallies. That's why birds aren't real. Quesadillas are sneaky easy to make oh yeah so like you can make them at home like you can just and you wouldn't think

but a burrito is like you gotta pan fry it so it's gonna do it you gotta do geometry if you're gonna make a fucking burrito yeah and you gotta figure out where the toppings go and which is funny because when i order them from somebody else and i take a bite and it's like this side of it is all the sour cream and this side of it is all the meat. I get very frustrated. But then when I try to make one myself, I'm like, I wouldn't even know how to start making sure these are mixed up. I don't mind it. Except for when you get a mouthful of guac.

Then it's like, okay. It's tough when you just get just wet. I know, Sean, you must have strong opinions about this. He's never had a mouthful of wet in his life. Everybody has strong opinions about getting a mouthful of wet burrito. It's disgusting. What? A mouthful of wet burrito?

Yeah, but you don't want your burrito to be dry. How wet? He wants it dry. I don't like it dry. We're talking about very, you don't like the spurt of burrito juice. That's what you're talking about, right? No, I don't.

I don't like it running on my hands. Burrito innards are wet usually. And if they're not, you got a problem I don't. I don't like it running on my hands. Burrito innards are wet usually and if they're not, you got a problem, Busker. Yeah. I like them. I like it like Frank's Red Hot.

You know, thick Frank's Red Hot isn't wet. It's like... Yes, it is. Do you know what wet means? Wet would be like if I poured water on it.

That's wet. Soggy. Katie nailed it earlier with saying soggy. I don't like soggy shit. Don't bring me into this. I'm actually not on your side, I don't think. soggy I don't like soggy shit Don't bring me into this I'm actually not on your side I don't think

Katie I don't like soggy shit Sorry to sound all bougie But I don't like soggy shit What do you want to do? Hoity toity I don't think what you're describing Is soggy though

I don't think he knows What he's describing Cheese doesn't make it wet Like nacho cheese Doesn't make something wet Yes it does Pico juice makes something wet. So like, you know, if you put pico on something and all the

juice that comes with pico, that's what makes it wet. Pico, pico, pico juice. Good, right? That was good, right? Let's all take a second and admit that was good. Yeah, it was good. Katie? Yeah. Good? Yeah. Sean?

Oh, now that Katie said, yes, it was good. Now that Katie said that though, Isaac, take that part that Ian was talking about Jewish stuff earlier and put that right before where Katie says yes. Yes. Then we got ourselves a show. Canceled. Canceled. Canceled.

Picojews. Picojews? So pico de gallo, but Jews. So like a Jewish... Guys, what are we doing? What are we doing back there? Myrtle, honestly. Stop.

Stop. He's in rice, Myrtle. She's like, dude, I'm just asleep. Why are you breaking up? Yeah, this isn't... It's because of the writer's strike. What's that, Myrtle? I don't have anything else to do.

They run Hollywood. Okay. Myrtle. All right. Wow. We do, but like, you know. So what? No, I think the Irish run Hollywood.

Everybody knows. Nobody has ever thought that. Stephen Dorff runs Hollywood. Daniel Day-Lewis. Sean Patrick Flannery. Is Hollywood a bar? Probably somewhere. In Hollywood?

Even then, you don't run it. Fucking potato eater. In Hollywood? Even then you don't run it. Fucking potato eater. Yeah, can we make potato and whiskey start with a Q for this draft? Q-tato? Q-iskey? I'll take a Q-tato and a Q-iskey.

You'd get it. It'd be very funny if QAnon people talked like bloods. Oh, that'd be so dank. If QAnon people talked like bloods. That would be. Oh, that'd be so dank. Oh, man. Oh, gosh. That'd be so tight.

Anyway. Quiz-a-dee-a. Sean, time for your second and third picks. Oh, crap. Yeah. Quap. Quap. Oh, quap.

It's a scale. We do accurately. So for my second pick, I don't know why I wasn't ready. Needle pulling thread. I wasn't. I'm going to pick, I like the word chi, Q-I. Wow. What does it mean? Great scrabble cheat.

A very good scrabble word. It's about the best one you can have for a Scrabble cheat. Yeah. How do they at the... What's the Taekwondo temple called? The cookie one. Isaac, I was going to get there. How do they say it at the cookie one?

I don't think we have a word for that in Korean. I think that's a Chinese word. Sean. It is. So I think you're being very culturally insensitive circulating life force whose existence and properties are the basis philosophy and medicine i was almost done we're at the beginning of a tailspin here where i'm being now i don't like what's happening i would never begin on another let me look it up no it's

i was being culturally insensitive and I pinned it on you so as to avoid any consequences. Maybe it's because I didn't graduate college but it feels like the end of this is going to be me doing something bad. Owie, tailspin.

I think there might be an equivalent in Korean. I think ki is what we call it. There's like a translation but it is a Chinese concept. Thank you. Thank you. You're being culturally insensitive, Isaac, by assuming

a Jew doesn't know about Korea. Wow. So my apologies. Accepted. Conditionally. She is a sneaky little one. It's mainly Chris Gravel. I think that we've all been worried about the chinoiserie on this podcast today. There's mainly Chris Gravel. I mean, I think that we've all been worried about the chinoiserie on this podcast today.

Oh, there he goes. Holy cow. Not a Q word. No, but a great word. Holy cow. Pretty much everything's funny if you say it with a Q. Isn't that like West? It's a Western take on Chinese motifs.

It's like imitating it. Yeah. Is that what it is? We just, what? Like like that's an american word we just stole it or did you just get done saying it was a chinese word it was used for like design it was like a british take on chinese design shinwazari oh shinwazari i thought we're still talking about chi no no chi is chi cool yeah that's dang i just wanted to make sure this is complicated this episode it is No, Chi is Chi. Cool. Yeah. That's dang. I just wanted to make sure.

This is complicated, this episode. It is. I had a feeling it was going to be. All right. So Chi is my second pick. My third pick, I'm going to pick Quaff. Quaff? Quaff.

I like that. What's that? Now, uh-oh, I'm sweating. Am I wrong? Is that like when you quaff your hair? Wait, you didn't say what you thought it was yet. Well, oh, I'm sweating. Am I wrong? Is that like when you quaff your hair? Wait, you didn't say what you thought it was yet.

Well, yeah, go on. I just did. Yeah. Oh, I thought you were saying you were wrong.

No, I don't know. I started sweating. Like, I'm going to say something dumb here. Quaff is, C is hair.

Yeah, C-O-I-F is hair. Quaff with a Q is a drink. C-O-I-F is hair? Yeahif with a Q is a drink. C-O-I-F is hair? Yeah. We wouldn't have got there for a while if you would have told me how to spell that one. Well, the number one question when you Google coif,

the Google question is, does coif mean hair? Yeah. That's how they get those questions. It just says no. They're like, who's right on the edge? Who do we ask? It's always me. Does coif mean hair? Yeah. That's how they get those questions. They're like, who's right on the edge? Who do we ask? And it's always me. Does coif mean hair? But what you took was drinking, which is something you probably, I mean, you have gray hair too, but you do enjoy the coif of beverage from time to time. I really like just saying the word. So what does the coif that I picked mean? This is fun.

Drink heartily. It just means to drink. Drink heartily as a verb. And as a noun, it means an alcoholic drink. And it's derived from the German word quassen It just means to drink? Drink heartily as a verb, and as a noun, it means an alcoholic drink. And it's derived from the German word quassen, which means to overindulge in something consumable. She's doing this off top, by the way. I love quassen menage. Sorry, I just had it. Croissant menage? Croissant menage.

Yeah, but I don't believe he drank all those beers. But emotionally, emotionally he did. Emotionally he did. I like a ham and cheese croissant how do we feel about that let's take him to the samanaja controversy man myrtle jesus myrtle's on the top of the bookshelf back i don't feel as bad as everybody seems to want me to for sure like it's a hot like i don't think that robin harris dated a woman named Bebe who made him watch her kids. You know what I'm saying? Like, it's fine.

Oh, ye of little faith. Yeah, I don't know. I wasn't really sweating it. I don't know. Yeah, I don't really care about it. I don't feel like breaking it down right now, personally. We're going to break it down. Let's talk about how I was wrong with the word that I picked, but it's still fun to say regardless of how you spell it.

I would have forgotten if you had just moved on and said that this is what you meant to pick. The only way I learned is owning my stuff. Welcome back to Hall of Fantasy Everything, where we're digging into the Hasan Minhaj controversy a month and a half late. Maybe two. Four people who don't really have strong opinions about it dig into the Hasan Minhaj

controversy. That'd be a freaking hilarious podcast. How do you feel? I don't know, man. What are you up to? You know what I mean? We just start talking about them all five minutes in. It's a really difficult industry. You know? I don't think that every... I don't know.

Yeah, I don't know. Isaac, this is the clip. You know it isn't. Good God. Imagine if this was our breakout. Yeah. Well, I don't know. I don't know, dude. I don't know dude I don't know I mean Asians are held to an unfair standard

yeah but he's cool he's a big NBA fan what are we supposed to criticize him I think that stuff is the clear the clear clip

I'm kidding low graphic low graphic uh to drink to drink heartily yeah yeah

see I just keep falling up I didn't know what I was picking And it turns out It's perfect for me Katie It is time for your first pick On things you would criticize About Hasan Minhaj

No And it's the way That he would make it seem Like something bad Happened to him Because of who he was As a person It's not the jokes

Oh Maybe someone does Have an opinion I have a ton of opinions I also have a ton of group chats my pick and it's my third is quicksand oh that's a good one and once again that is having to do with

quicksand it's something we all feared as a child can you tell me what it means before I try to spell it I can't I can't wait for you to try to spell it it means exceedingly idealistic unrealistic and impractical. I believe it's from Don Quixote. Is it not?

It is. It is indeed. So that should be a... Say it one more time. A hint. Don Quixote. Windmills. Right.

Quixotic. Is it Q-U-I-X? It is. Come on, baby. Let's go. Let's go Let's go O-T Push that shit out

Is it D? O-T O-T I see Man Come on Damn it Oh you said D? No you just got it

You said it I started with D But then you shook your head Ian Oh I thought you said T Oh I thought you said D It sounded like T So you didn't have to own it

But that's how you learned I said D and you shook your head Until I switched to T I'm excited about the X. I'm excited about the Q-U-I-X part. Yeah, you did good. That was really good. I'll give it to you.

Great Scrabble word if you manage to have all the letters because a Q and an X. You ever sit and wait for a Scrabble word like that to come together? Oh, I got a hundred and, I think 180 in Words with Friends one time.

Damn, okay. Oh, Words with Friends is different. I'm murdering you. I can't. I'm talking about all the board Scrabble though IRL It's just oh it's different

Do you ever sit and wait for a Scrabble Alright go ahead He's been trying to say this for like 15 minutes that's why he acted out Your face says you're hurt Just wondering if you've ever tried to sit And have a Scrabble word come together And then it never did and you lost the game Everybody say no I've done that I've played a shit load of Scrabble word come together and then it never did and you lost the game. Oh, yeah. Everybody say no. Everybody say no.

I've done that. I've played a weirdly... Leave him out. I've never even heard of that happening. I've played a shitload of Scrabble. I've never done that and I think it's stupid to even talk about it.

Scrabble and Jeopardy are the two best games ever invented in my opinion. Okay, all right. I'm back in. Scrabble for board game, Jeopardy for game show. Scrabble is great.

It's so much fun. My wife... Can I talk now or do you have another fucking... Are you going to talk about how your wife got smoked like a pack of Kool's and Bananagrams

twice in a row by me? Bananagrams is a different game. Bananagrams is a different game. Woo! The whole pack! But I will say... I mean, you were... Like, Sean was blackout drunk

and beat me at Trivia... Beat Dana and I at Trivial Pursuit and then beat Dana twice at Bananagrams. That's disgusting. What's Bananagrams? Oh, what are Bananagrams? You get the bag full

of tiles. Street Scrabble? Street Scrabble is like Domino Scrabble. It is. Okay. You just get, there's like I didn't say Domino Scrabble. I feel like that has connotations. I didn't mean the street, but I just meant like you're sliding tiles around. But it's like you get like, I think there's 200, 150 maybe? But you each

start with 15 tiles. You turn them all over and then you got to spell words like in a crossword puzzle style. And then so when you're able with no board, yeah, kind of, but when you're out of your letters, you say peel,

then you each pick another letter and you have to go until they're all gone. And you have to say peel like the notorious big though. Peel. Nah, I didn't do it like that. It sounded like me. Yeah, it did.

It really did. Welcome. Welcome. Great. Great. peel nah i didn't do it like that like me yeah it really did welcome welcome uh great great glad we walked down that path thank you sean quick saw tick when i i was gonna say when i i i can't play scrabble with my wife she is so good at it yeah that like it affects our relationship she is that fucking crit like it's i didn't know it like she i i it's how you feel when you play tennis with somebody who's really good at tennis where you're like hey i'm not even having fun okay like i'm here whatever like i guess you can practice your shots against me i'm not having fun and i feel bad about myself. Yeah. I'd be so bummed if I had to play Scrabble

against Dana. I know I would. She can't play with anyone in her family. She's going to have to go seek out professional people to play against. She's got to go start playing old men in the park. Yeah, she really does. She should set up a Scrabble board in the park and see what happens. Probably a pigeon would take one of the pieces.

That'd be funny. Can you imagine? Or a silly little turn of events. I would like that. Isaac, get the New Yorker on the horn. We have an idea for a comic. I got it. The horn means the phone. See if we can get a tote.

See if they have any totes. We're going to get at least three totes out of this. I will cast that shit to the left. David Borey, it's time for your sequel to Quinceañera. Quarrelous. Oh! It just sounds like... Then it's fighting words. Yeah, it sounds like what it is. Like, if you were to be like...

Like, if I didn't know and they were like, man, Jake's coming over, but I don't like him. He's real quarrelous. I'd be like, yeah, but that guy starts fights a lot. But you know what I mean? It just is another one that sounds just like it has a lot of going on in the middle there. It's kind of hard to say.

Is that what it means? What does it mean? Argumentative or given to complaint. Yeah, like you quarrel a lot. Would you like to spell it, Sean? No. This won't stop, dude. Q-U-A-R-R-E-L-O-U-S.

Oh, man! Come on! Did I get it? Almost stepped on the wrong stair and then pulled his foot back and then ran down the rest of the stairs. Can't be stopped. Unreal. Unreal. I don't even know if we should finish the episode after that.

Oh, that feels good. I'm going to tell Laura about that. You should. I'm going to tell Dana. I'm going to tell my wife that I spelled a word right. It's Sue Carmel on the horn. Let her know. Everybody's got to find out about this.

Do we need quarrelous and quarrelsome are they both the same do they mean the same thing quarrelous according to Miriam Webster Miriam it is a

it is a what's the word it's a quarrel quarrelous it's no longer it's no longer used it's not a

it is a obsolete word they call it really I guess I've only ever read it. I think you get it though. It doesn't mean it's, yeah. I don't see why not.

I'll take Quarrel some if that's easier. They've taken words out of the dictionary. They do that? They list them as obsolete, but they're still in there. Yeah, people just stop using them and then they turn into something else. What was the newest word added to the dictionary, do you think? They add words all the time. I just saw.

Yeah, it's like a bunch of. Like selfie. You'd be pissed. They added selfie recently. The words they add words all the time. I just saw. Yeah, it's like a bunch of... Like selfie. You'd be pissed. They added selfie recently. The words they add, you're always like, this sucks. I think I saw that they added... What's the thing dads always say

instead of the way they're supposed to say? Irregardless. I think irregardless got added to the dictionary, which upset me. That's insane. I hate that. Why are we helping those people?

I don't know. Just made up a word enough? My dad says irregardless a lot. That I like. Quite a bit. Yeah, I do like that. Who dad says irregardless a lot. That I like. Quite a bit. Yeah, I do like that. Who's that uncle you have that I really like? Hmm?

You have an uncle and you were telling me about him. Oh, Glenn? No. Yeah. There's no chance. Glenn, from my Instagram stories, would be the only way that you know Glenn. I really liked him.

He's like a real asshole. Yeah. Oh, there's one of your uncles that I was like, man, I get that guy. I know, I know he's doing framing him. That's right.

Right. And they said it, it was the coolest part was getting them to say that on network television. One of my dreams, man, from Sioux Falls,

South Dakota, the guy who's going to lose Jeopardy. January Jones. Yeah, no shit. More like Jew Falls, South Dakota. I don't think that is.

I said I had a hard out and it's now. So I didn't have to go. Time for my third pick. Which we're all going to have a lot of fun talking about. That is right now? Yeah. No, Katie, you have a hard out right now? No, I was just trying to move on from the things that Ian was mumbling.

Oh, gosh. I got so nervous because in one of the texts, you did say you had a hard out. Yeah, it's at 3.30. Dude, my heart is beating so fast right now. It's crazy. Why? Because I just thought I fucked everything up. Because it's 40.

More like Jew Falls. All right. And then, so I do have to head out though, Sean. So if you can wrap that up. Jew Falls, South Jakarta. All right. South up. It's a good falls. South Dakota. Oh, right. South Dakota. I don't know.

Jakarta is the capital of Indonesia. I didn't know that. Jakarta from what I've been hearing. I did know that. In June Asia. In June. Need you. It just goes with all of them.

In June. Need you. In And you need you. And you need you. You're from Juverton, Oregon? That's where you went to high school? Juverton, Juverton. If you read between the lines. Very few Jews in Beaverton.

Go ahead and read between the lines right here. That's rude. You're flicking me off, dude. I always used to hate it when people would say flicking off. Oh, I did too. Instead of flipping? Yeah. It's like if you're not going to say fuck, at least

you know, the P's. Yeah, come on, man. What are we doing? The time has come. You know what always bothered me was this one. When people did this instead of just this, when they did this whole thing. I don't mind this. I don't mind this. Oh, I hated it. I don't mind this. I hated it.

The people that did it first in my life were the kids that were trying to seem cool. And so I associated that with those people. I don't mind the actual doing of this, but the people who did it in like middle school, it was always like kids who were like, eh. For the listeners, we're talking about a middle finger where the surrounding fingers

aren't really bent that much. So it's kind of like training wheels for flipping somebody off. It does look cooler than that. That looks crazy. No, but this looks disrespectful.

That gets the point across. Yeah. What about the Kylo Ren where you got the finger out on the side? You know what I mean? Where it's got the guards. Oh gosh, that's nasty.

That's sick. Did that to somebody? That's so sick. This looks what I mean? Where it's got the guard. Oh, gosh, that's nasty. That's sick. Did that to somebody? That's so sick. This looks like a fighter jet to me. I'm taking quack. Whoa. Fucking nonsense, doctor. Yeah, you fucking Toronto-ass doctors.

Or the noise a duck makes. I think the doctor from Toronto might have been, or the noise a duck makes. Specifically, I'm taking the noise a duck makes. Although, as of this recording, those ducks recently lost a heartbreaker. Man, I felt so bad for that kid yesterday. Man, the Huskies, though, boy.

Yeah, they're looking good. Yeah. They're looking real good. What's that kicker's name? Oregon's kicker? Whatever. He's a kid. Oh, I just felt bad for that. I always feel bad for kickers. His name is Maxine. Oh, damn it.

Oh, no. I got to go down and I got to hug young Maxine. I got to hug college Maxine. Quack, dude. Yeah. It's one of my favorite onomatopoeias. It's very funny. Quack.

Quack. It is a good quack. Quack. Quack. And Mighty Ducks. Ducks fly together. Quack. Quack. Quack. Quack. Quack. Quack. Quack. ducks fly together quack attack is back quack those fucking movies that hold on me

god bro when they were just talking about all the shit where they were like when the roosters crowing and the cow won't stop hitting your mom ducks fly together oh man just the best when you're having an adverse reaction to the Pfizer vaccine why did we abandon that that should have become like a

like a one of the main pillars of our society is ducks fly together we need that more than anything right now that's the kind of unity we could really use is ducks fly together. We need ducks flying together. We could have used you on the sixth, brother. It would have been that we were trying to fly together, man. Amen, dude. Don't believe me. We were involved just from behind the scenes, pulling the strings.

Doesn't help. Can't stop the steal from behind the scenes, my friend. All right. Talk to Mr. Biden about that Next time you see him Whenever you guys go to dinner Whatever you do Quack

Quack When your friends go too deep on a bit You don't feel comfortable with Ducks fly together Wait you don't like that? You don't like that movie Katie? What? No, what? I love that movie.

She was talking about the... I got really scared. No. No, I love that movie. She was talking about the 301 bit. Yeah, okay. Yeah, I got it. Yeah, I didn't like it either.

I didn't vote, so... I loved it. You know, it all flies together. Oh, the pervert who stole your mic? You know. The Laker girls. No's a file on that one oh I can see your mouth moving

they left that out of winning time conveniently that never was in conveniently real convenient that they chose to leave Lawrence Tantor a winning time conveniently. That never was in. Conveniently? That's why it got canceled. Real convenient that they chose to leave Lawrence Tantor saying Laker girls at a winning time. That could have been at least one episode. A capsule episode.

Laker girls. It would have gotten canceled in a different way if they did that. Laker girls. Quack is my third pick. We're getting to my fourth pick right after we take another Short break This episode of all Fantasy everything is brought to you by Schedule 35

Now microdosing is an absolute game changer I have never heard a bad word about it And like we said this episode Of all fantasy everything is brought to you by Schedule 35 our partner in getting Things done imagine If you could. Let me just take you on a walk. You got a tool, sharpens your focus. It's going to clear your mind up.

It's going to keep your anxiety at bay, which, man, wouldn't that be nice? And it's going to do it all day long. It's like a Swiss army knife for your mind. Might sound like a magic pill. I know I said it before, but that's, I swear to God, it's the plot of Limitless. It might sound like that, but you can actually get it done. There's the magic of microdosing with Schedule 35. They're products, they're backed by science and dose to a precise amount so you get exactly what you need to tackle your toughest days and you don't get the hallucinogenic effects. I feel like there's a lot of stigma attached with things like this, but Schedule 35, I feel like there's a lot of stigma attached with things like this. But Schedule 35, they're on a mission to de-stigmatize and educate on the science and real-world benefits of psilocybin,

of which there are a ton. And they also want to make it accessible for everyone. Each order ships discreetly. No one's going to get in your business. No one's going to be in your kitchen stirring your Kool-Aid. It just comes in a nice little box and it comes with a microdosing regime that keeps you on track. So you start small. I think that's the key to this. You start small and just let it ride. I know so many people do it. So, so, so many people do it. I don't think you're going to be disappointed. I strongly advise you give it a shot. And if you do, you get 15% off with code ALLFANTASY at schedule35.co. That's 15% off at schedule35.co and use promo code ALLFANTASY. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Now, with this week, we want to touch a little bit on self-care routines, some stuff that's

non-negotiable. Some stuff like you can't, I got buddies, they can't skip leg day. Myself, my schedule is completely packed out with hanging out with my daughter. You try to pepper in work in there, it's really hard to find the time for those things that I want, that self-care stuff. I like to walk a lot. I know that sounds ridiculous and I don't know what fun means, but I do like walking. I love to skateboard, but it's hard. I got to drive to the park. I got to get warmed up, which takes your boy a gentleman's half hour these days because these gams ain't what they used to be. But I know that's what makes me happy. And it's hard to make time for it. When you feel like you

don't have any time for yourself, it can weigh on you more than anything else. Non-negotiables like therapy are more important than ever in that situation. You need to set time, get it like I keep saying, get a new set of ears on it. If you're having a tough time finding time for yourself, if you just talk to someone, you say these things out loud,

you will realize that there is time. You can make time for yourself. You just have to prioritize it. It happens. You can talk to someone, you say these things out loud, you will realize that there is time. You can make time for yourself. You just have to prioritize it. It happens. You can talk to someone, get a new set of ears on it, and they will just guide you through the path. Therapy helps with everything. And if you're thinking of starting, go on and get better help a try. Give it a shot. It helps for learning positive coping skills, setting boundaries, all these things that are extremely important. It's all online. It's convenient, flexible. They suit to your schedule. Go on and fill out a brief questionnaire. You get matched with a licensed therapist and you can switch therapists at any time for zero additional

charge. They got your back. Never skip therapy day with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com slash all fantasy today to get 10% off your first month that's better help help.com slash all fantasy and we're back welcome back to all fantasy everything already in progress thanks right i don't know i'm trying different energies i'm trying different energies no you should it's cool this is our experimentation phase i I think by January 1st, we'll have whatever the podcast is going to be locked down. But in the meantime, you've got to explore the space. Of course. By January 6th,

Sean will reshape it. Yeah. Dang. He'll take over whatever the podcast was. Dang. I'll do what I've got to do, you know? Now, not only can you listen to us on the All Fantasy Everything podcast, you can also see us in person. My name is Ian Carmel, at Ian Carmel on Twitter,

at Ian Carmel on Instagram, and on TikTok. I'm hitting the road. You can see me at, oh, that's when this comes out. You can see me at the House of Comedy in Vancouver, British Columbia, November 30th through December 3rd with Sean Jordan. Doing stand-up comedy. Having a great time. You can see me in Austin, Texas

at the Vulcan Gas Company December 8th and 9th. You can see me at the City Winery in New York City January 4th with a bunch of special guests. The City Winery in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania January 5th. And the City Winery in Boston, Massachusetts

on January 6th. You can see me at Hyena's in Fort Worth, Texas January 19th and 20th and at Revolution Hall in Portland, Oregon March 23rd. Pre-order t-shirt swim club and be wonderful to each other. Sean Jordan is here. Sean

S. Jordan on Twitter. Sean Cougar Melon Jordan on Instagram. Yeah, man. Sean Jordan Comedian on YouTube, where I'll be releasing my special unless Netflix buys it, which they won't. They might. They might.

But anyway, so subscribe to that. I'll be in Omaha November 16th at Tiny House Bar, November 30th through December 3rd. As Ian said, Vancouver, BC. Cutting it up. Going on hikes. Walking on suspension bridges

January 18th through the 21st I believe the Snow Jam Comedy Festival in Sioux Falls, South Dakota where else would it be? And then what February 1st through the 4th we're going to be in Phoenix Oh god that's right! All just ripping it up at CB Live it'll be, tickets aren't on sale yet but as soon as they

are we'll be sure to post about it but it's CB Live so I know somebody said they're't on sale yet, but as soon as they are, we'll be sure to post about it. But it's CB Live, so I know somebody said they're going to plan a vacation around the whole thing. So all the rest of you should too. It's going to be a blast. Are you going to do karaoke? The bar next door has live band karaoke. Where? Now hold on. Next to the club.

Can I go? Can I come? Can I come? Of course. Yeah. I saw a guy. I want to go to Phoenix. I saw a guy absolutely rip that shit one time. He was wearing all Jaguars gear. Jaguars hat, Jaguars shirt, Jaguars pants, Jaguars shoes. Dude. Drinking by himself and then went up in eight.

That guy stopped existing as soon as that night was over. He appears once every 50 years. Whatever that Friday night is, we have the live AFP. After that, live band karaoke. Calling it. Yeah, it's right next to, it's like across the, from the venue. Yeah, dude. Yes.

Yes. And they let you drink for free if you were on the show. Yes. Oh my God. It's getting bigger. Yes. Anyways. David B getting bigger. Yes. Uh-oh. Yes. Anyways.

David Borey is here. CoolGuyJokes77 on Instagram. Where can people see you perform? The tour is over. Yeah. I'm going to be headlining Denver Comedy Works

November 12th, I believe. And then I'm going to be featuring for Shane Torres at Comedy on State Thanksgiving weekend. I believe and then I'm going to be featuring for Shane Torres at Comedy on State Thanksgiving weekend oh fun

and then I got some shit in December I don't know the tour's over guys so go fuck yourselves you know I'm done I'm trying to price out of this racket you think I want to keep playing clubs talking to you for the rest of my life? No way.

I got dreams, baby. Yeah, man. What are they? Dreams to remember. Not to go on tour anymore. Jesus, I'm so tired. We are working on a, speaking of being tired, we are working on an All Fantasy Everything string of dates that we hope to have out to you.

At some point, we want to come see you. Damn right. And so we will. We want to hold you. In the meantime, follow us all on our social so we can continue to be professional comedians. And let's get right back into that delicious podcast goodness. Is this four?

You're on four? I'm on four? And I'm taking one of those recent uh miriam webster words i'm sorry david i'm taking qwerty i don't understand now see what do they say it means it is a specific type of keyboard oh q-w-e-r-t-y yeah because of the well now sean can't spell it that's totally how i was gonna it. Great. No, you saved me the trouble, man. Thanks. That was nice. Great.

David. It's the keyboard. The integrity of the spelling bee has been destroyed. It has collapsed. Thanks. I would have got it wrong. Why is that? T-H-A-N-K-S.

That's barely a word. I was going to say Q and then spell wordy. So I was going to say Q-W-O-R-D-Y So it just means the type of keyboard It's just like a QWERTY keyboard It's because the regular keyboard setup What other type of keyboard is there? Well top left to right though is Q-W-E-R-T

They had keyboards that are like alphabetical too Remember? On phones and shit like that They used to be like alphabetical It does, it says QWERTY right up there. Q-W-E-R-T-Y right at the top of row of my keyboard. Look at that. That's cool.

That's your first interaction with that. Yep. You've never noticed or known. I mean, I know. I guess I would have known they were there if you asked, but I never would have thought that it's about. I've never heard that word ever in my life until just now. I don't know what I heard it to be fair.

We didn't do it in keyboarding. I mean, we had keyboarding in middle school and we, she never, I don't know. I never heard that word. Am I just a dork? This is shocking to me.

Well, we might be dorks. I might also be a dork. Yeah. I don't know. I wasn't really the best student. I'm not. All my students were.

I mean, I don't think a lot of my student i wasn't a great student either i don't think it was like i just feel like i use a laptop a lot yeah but you didn't read any other sequence well because as division isn't sayable and is also about chuckle or wheel chuckle where are you looking at chuckle? Jekyll. JKL, that's just the alphabet. JKL, that's the order they go. What about I-O? What about J-K-L-O-L?

That's fun. Just kidding, laugh out loud. David, time for your fourth best. Quell. Oh! Fun one. That is a fun one Q-U-E-L-L? What do you like about it? Talk about it Nice

I like that it sounds large Does that make sense? That sounds like a big wave or something Yeah, yeah, yeah Because it sounds like swell Yeah wave or something yeah yeah yeah like i like it sounds like swell yeah and just but with the cue it like makes it more dynamic than that even and i think cue is a sound that makes words sound larger in general well well that's a take yeah and now quell means What? What does it mean? Like to stop something, to quell it Yeah

Like it's overflowing and I have to quell it That's what I do with my emotions Okay You quell them Sure You don't do anything good, you do a quell Why are you so upset with this, Katie? I'm not upset, I'm not upset at all

It feels like for the first time we're going back to our old relationship No I feel like we've done the work Look me in the for the first time we're going back to our old relationship. No, David. I feel like we've done the work. Look me in the eyes, David. We will never go back to our old relationship. How many hours of group therapy have we been through? We're on the new season of the Showtime show. Yeah.

No, we will never go back. We have found ourselves in a lovely place. It's me and Katie and they're like, what's your relationship? And we're like, we're on a podcast together every now and again. And I'm just going nuts. I can't stop. I'm so upset every second of the day. I can't grow my emotions.

Wow. And that. Atta boy. Atta boy. Is the host of the show. That's the host of the show. Where'd you get a pen? I've had a pen the whole time.

I'm always writing you guys don't what do you think I'm looking over here because something interesting is happening I have to write it down I have to write it down

so that later I'll have things to throw away and go why did I ever write this down I had to I must keep a record I'm keeping minutes and so that was

Q-U-E-L-L-O-C-B spelled correctly by Corboy. Quell. Corboy. Cor-Coy. Katie, spelled Q-A-T-I-E, of course. It's time for your... Quitty.

Fourth pick. I feel so torn. I'm so torn. You're all out of faith? This is how you feel. Nothing's right. I'm torn. Okay, I think I'm going to take take because i wanted to take the word that

means the same thing as david's word but it's a different word and then but then i'm but i can't because we already i just got worried about our relationship there in the dynamic i don't want this to feel like some sort of sometimes you just have to put words to it to you have to know you know what i mean i want to qu. I want to quash our beef. There we go. I want to quash our beef once and for all. I want to make sure it's quashed to the moon and back. Quintessentially quashed.

Quash is a wetter quiche. That is right. Yes. And quash is spelled. Yeah. Q-U-A What does quash is spelled yeah Q-U-A what does quash mean it's like

the same thing as as quell like suppress it's the same thing as squash you squash it you quash it I think Q-U-A-S-H

to put an end to yeah yeah that's it you got it the way David's so supportive of you spelling things is kind of if i didn't have access to the video of this i would pay the patreon so that i could have access to the video of david extremely supportive supporting him silently hi oh my god

what's up, dog? What is this? It's my latte. They were out of everything else. Oh, shit. It's bad down there. I scroll back for two to see what it is. Damn, thank you. I'll drink it. It's delicious. Our Starbucks is going through something right now.

They just don't have anything. What's happening? He said he had to scroll back three months to find something I liked that I have ordered before that they had. So it's a pumpkin spice latte, which I will admit I ordered it once because you got to order the inaugural. It's fall time. Pumpkin spice latte. It's a tasty beverage. You don't have to explain anything to us. Now I feel like a hack because here I am on video accepting a pumpkin spice latte. Like it's my regular drink.

Turns out right now, Starbucks is a paid advertiser on the show. So thank you, Katie. Katie is wearing an oatmeal roll neck sweater. And she's holding it like this. Yeah. Dark jeans.

And there's all these leaves inside. Knee high, tan, natural leather boots. And you can say anything about my blonde extensions that are curled but a little straight.

They look fantastic. Thank you so much. Blonde extensions. Boy, that's the South Dakota handbook right there. You're listening to an Alan Jackson song or something? You're listening to Panera Bread. I ate at Panera the other day. Man, that place is mid as fuck.

Mid is a compliment. Yeah, I don't really get there too much. It is bland as fuck. It is crazy. It's like a dry sandwich. they were the first to do that thing that's why we liked them it wasn't because they were good it was because they were the first to do the like artisan sandwich with a soup or a salad like you didn't have to it was like fast food but it wasn't like it felt more like food you mean like fast casual dining yeah but i feel that was pioneered in denver colorado we invented it and it was not like food. You mean like fast casual dining? Yeah, but I feel they were early in fast casual-ish.

That was pioneered in Denver, Colorado. We invented it and it was not Panera. Who? By who? Colorado. Chipotle? Chipotle, yeah. Chipotle was early. Is that where Chipotle came from? Yeah, it is where Chipotle came from. Dan knows. Ask him about it. I know. I gotta learn.

First Chipotle I ever went to was on Smokey Hill Road. How about that? Tell Dan. I know. Hey, to learn. First Chipotle I ever went to was on Smoky Hill Road. How about that? Tell Dan. I know. Hey, Dan. Get in here. David's got some shit to say. Come quick. David once went to a Chipotle on Smoky Hill Road.

It's right up the street from his high school. Right up the street from your high school. If we just saw him kick the door down and be like, no, he didn't. He didn't. It's a good Chipotle. Hell yeah. There it is.

That's what you're talking about. Oh, God. Come on. That's good. That's good. It's a new t-shirt. I feel like you just felt Smokey Hill Road

getting talked about. Yeah. That's really funny. Dank. There he goes. Quash. Quash. Sean, come for your fourth

and then your final picks on this, the All Fantasy Everything podcast. Tell me if I can do this. You can do it. I'm going to pick Q-Tip. Put your back into it. Because I want the rapper. You want to take what? I'm going to pick Q-Tip because I want the rapper.

But Q-Tip is also a word. What are your three favorite Q-Tip songs? Just Q-Tip. It's got to be just Q-Tip? Yep. Just Q-Tip is also a word. What are your three favorite Q-tip songs? Just Q-tip. It's got to be just Q-tip? Yep. No, that's not fair. I couldn't name three just Q-tip songs. Q-tip and Company. They're all off-beat rhymes in life,

except for Can I Kick It? So I'll say Can I Kick It? I like phony rappers a lot. And how about Motivators? You know my favorite Q-tip song? I knew where you set me up. The Hot Boys remix. I really liked him on that song.

It was great. Yeah, and Vibrant Thing that Kamala Harris was just dancing to for some reason. Yeah. Do you guys see that? Yes, I did. Weird dancing. Weird dancing. Who am I to say?

She does not actually like hip hop. Who am I to say Who am I to say But as somebody who points a lot when they dance I do get it That's like Is he in bars door No I think he's Stunned silence

You bummed on the pic I'm not bummed I can do it I don't even play Q-tip It's a proper divine Q-tip starts with a Q Q-T-I-P I think you can do a Q-tip. It's a proper device. I mean, Q-tip, the Q-tip starts with a Q, you know, Q-T-I-P, right? Like the ear Q-tip. Yeah, I think you can take it.

You just also have to take the sticks with little cotton balls on the end of them. It's fine. You have to take them both. I like those sticks. Don't shove them in your ears. I don't know how many people I have to tell that. I go a normal amount in. I mean, I'm not hurting myself.

I put them right in there. You're cramming the wax in. I get all the wax in. No, I don't think I am cramming wax in. I think I'm scooping myself I put them right in there I get all the wax in I don't think I am cramming wax in I think I'm scooping it out the sides I don't stab in I'm like a surgeon in there but have you seen let me get deep on this though

have you seen those ads on your Instagram it doesn't look like a tool we should have access to but it has a camera and a light and it goes into your ear and you scoop out the wax with like a metal. That sounds like it feels so good though. I know, but I don't think we should be just giving the average person the ability to

do that. The wax is to keep us from getting from infections. You can have too much of it, but the wax is good. I get mine taken out. It's been a few years but i've oh yeah you could i've never done that i've never done i get them irrigated they like the fire inside or the it i mean that one sorry to sound crass it is absolutely the second

best feeling that you can have the first being when somebody does that thing on your knees where they do this giving a gift instead of receiving a gift i think he i let's not pretend like we don't all know he's talking about jizzing. Talking about jizzing. But the second best feeling you get is when they put... Can't you just call it like orgasming so that the girls can be included as well? Yeah, jorgasming. Yeah, I know, but you

called it jizzing. Oh, I'm sorry. I meant for Sean specifically. It's not inclusive. Jazz-gasming? I don't know if the best feeling... That's what it's called when a lady does a jazzgaz. They take a stool softener and put it in your ear to soften up the wax. And then they get these little tweezers out. Stool softener.

This guy's not funny. He has poop in his ear. This guy has poop in his ear. Hey, everybody. I just saw this guy put poop in his ear. That's comedy 101 when you have poop in your ear. And your fifth pick. I got to do.

I got to go. And it's funny because you just talked about Chipotle. But I was going to do this from jump. I'm going to pick Qdoba. I'm not even looking at you guys. I'm going to do it. I got to do, I got to go. And it's funny because you just talked about Chipotle, but I was going to do this from jump. I'm going to pick Qdoba. I'm not even looking at you guys. I'm going to do it. I'm doing it. Did you not know actual words?

These are very funny. I do. I love Qdoba. I love Qdoba. I've always loved it. We had it before Chipotle. I love Qdoba. I still eat there when I can. I love Qdoba.

It's a Q word and I'm taking it. It was from jump. It was going to be my last pick. I've never eaten Qdoba. Just like Chipotle. Here's the thing that Qdoba has that Chipotle doesn't have. And I wonder why Chipotle doesn't. No, dude.

No, it's ground beef. Oh, really? Chipotle doesn't have ground beef. Because we're artisans over here. Yeah, sure. But sometimes you just want a ground beef quesadilla. Not me. We had Qdoba in Sioux Falls way, way before Chipotle.

We'd go there all the time it was like one of the first where you could get a burrito and not have it be Taco Bell or something where you could like go get a burrito and like pick what was on it I don't know it felt like I've never ordered a burrito from Taco Bell I don't trust them if I can't see it interesting trust them if you can't I don't trust them to hide a thing in there I need to see need to look at it stuff they're putting in the shelves yeah I know I know, but at least I can see it. I get it. There's something about that. I can't bite trustingly

into a pocket made for me by Taco Bell. I know that it's not going to be received well. David, David, David, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. The first Qdoba? Denver, Colorado. I believe it. I believe it. Doesn't mean it doesn't suck. It's funny, I was Googling the same thing. We're saying Q places the first Quiznos, also Denver, Colorado. I believe it. I believe it. Doesn't mean it doesn't suck. It's funny. I was Googling the same thing.

We're saying Q place is the first Quiznos. Also, Denver, Colorado. Oh, Quiznos. You want to have a tummy ache. Quiznos rules. Y'all don't like Quiznos? I had a bad experience at the Quiznos. If I would have thought about Quiznos,

I would have put that before Qdoba and picked that instead. But I didn't think about it. It's a wet sandwich. No, it is not a wet sandwich. I would say it's the wettest. It's much wetter than Subway. It is a wet sandwich. A hot cooked sandwich doesn't qualify as a wet sandwich. It's a hot wet sandwich. No, it is not a wet sandwich. I would say it's the wettest. It's much wetter than Subway. It is a wet, wet sandwich.

A hot cooked sandwich doesn't qualify as a wet sandwich. It's a hot, wet sandwich. You don't understand what qualifies. You have not been able to narrow this down for us in a way that we understand. You're moving wet all over the board.

Don't you ever look at yourself and go, maybe it's me. Maybe it's me. Maybe the thing I'm describing is not clicking because it doesn't exist. Quiznos had that bat shady one sauce. Does wet really exist?

Sauce is wet. Sauce is wet. Sauce is wet. What do you want? I'm just trying to be honest. Is lettuce on your burger wet? Do you not like lettuce on a burger because it's wet? That's what I'm asking. I don't like lettuce on a burger

because it's disgusting. That's why I don't like lettuce on a burger. Do you see? That's what I'm asking. I don't like lettuce on a burger because it's disgusting. That's why I don't like lettuce on a burger. Do you see how I'm trying? He doesn't want. He doesn't want. He wants to watch the world burn. He's the Joker. He doesn't want to be understood. No, you're right.

Me and the Joker, man. You want to know how he got those scars? The only thing he wants to see when he lifts up the burger bun is the fucking Joker face. Twisted. Twisted burger. With purple and green ketchup. You remember that shit? Make the Joker face with smash purple and green ketchup you remember that shit make the joker face out of purple and green ketchup i'll eat it that's all you want that's just still nasty to me you don't like ketchup at all no i'm not you remember green and purple

ketchup that shit was nasty what did your parents put on everything so you'd eat it when you were a kid? David? Poverty. Chips. There was never like a you're not going to eat this. Maybe because my mom's from a different country, there was never like any like, oh, do you like? It was never an option. You ate it. Yeah, we made dinner. Oh, you don't have to eat dinner. I just liked everything.

I think I was a lot of that too. I had no, I never had any i liked yeah i liked all food all everything but tomato i was like fucking scoop it up i'm in tomatoes kelly jordan's pickier than i am so she i think she probably informed most of how i feel but she doesn't like most stuff so like i didn't really have a huge list of options tell you what sean doesn't have trouble finding something to eat. Qdoba, baby. Yeah.

What's your order at Qdoba? Chicken burrito. Real simple. Chicken burrito, cheese. I'll put the queso on there. That's what I thought you were going to say the big difference is because they have that like real thing queso. You put that on there.

Because I've had this argument a million times. Chipotle has queso now. You get chip. You put the little chip pieces on there for some crunch so you don't dare have to have a vegetable on there. Chipotle has queso now. You put little chip pieces on there for some crunch so you don't dare have to have a vegetable on there. You can get crunch out of chips instead of vegetable. And then pinot beans. And then, yeah, they have Tabasco.

Have you ever tried getting the vegetarian option anywhere, Sean? It sounds counterintuitive, but you'll be surprised a lot of places because they only have one vegetarian thing they make it'll be like fucking fire and that might help i mean you know by default like a cheese pizza or something that's not what i was saying no i rarely rarely would i get i've never ever ordered a veggie option. Ever.

Try it out? On purpose. Try it out? I'll try it out. I'll try it out. I don't think he's going to try it out. I think he might. I'm not a liar. I'll try it. If I say I'm going to try it, I'll try it. Are you talking about like tofu or are you talking about like a bunch of like More like. Because it's usually

grilled onions and mushrooms. Yeah, I like that I know we like it I love it too but you know I would quayway that all over the place Kated time for your final pick oh my god it is are you sure

Qdoba off the board oh no that was what I was going to take oh no I have to take quince. Yeah. The whole thing. The reason we're here.

Quince. I'm still not even entirely sure what it is. I don't either. It's like a... A fruit? I think... I don't know what kind. I don't think I've ever eaten it.

I think it's citrus. And that was, that was like the one. A deciduous tree that bears hard, aromatic, bright, golden yellow palm fruit, similar in appearance to a pear.

Yeah, I was wrong. They're very tart and hard. Was quince, that was the one that Rosie, that was like the last. Yeah.

That was the one pick we heard her pick, right? Yeah. I'm tired and hard dude was that was that was she explaining to him that the quince or was that the because there was a clip where she was on Jeopardy there's a clip where she bleep she like buzzes

in and says what is a quince okay and he goes she's in the zone which the reason I'm picking quince is because that's what Dan said to the host's wife when I was doing well in a category. He leaned over and said, she's in this and the lady was like,

what? Never mind. What was the category? Start with the letter Q. No, no. The one that I did well in this Jeopardy. Yeah, what was it? You cleaned it. Was it the word that means where

you're from? Like Demonyms? Was it Demonyms? No, it was on the far right. It was the far right. Where was it on January 6th? Can't remember. Right where it needs to be. It's way on the right. I don't remember. I'll figure it out.

Do you have a time for your final pick? Quandary. Ooh. A veritable one or just a regular one? A veritable quandary. There we go. Because it's confusing just to say. What's the veritable part mean?

What? What? What's the veritable quant? Like, what's, you know, what's that mean? Veritable is like a, it's like a, it's like a, it means like very, kind of.

It's like one of those. Like a verifiable. It's a veritable, fruits and veritables. Gotcha. Yeah, I don't like the veritables that much. Q-U-A-N-D-R-Y.

Yes. Well, you're like, it's a, it's a, it's from, yeah. What's that? What's happening down there? Do you not know what veritable means? I mean, I do. I can use it. It's one of those words that I...

Yeah, there's words where you know what they mean, but they're hard to explain to people. Totally. I think I can use that word, but I just wouldn't know what to... It's used for metaphors and similes, where you're like, it's an actual... It's used for metaphors and similes where you're like, it's an actual... What's a metaphor?

It was like... He was running around like a veritable chicken with his head cut off. I mean, that's a bad example. Damn, I'd punch that up. Yeah, yeah. His nuts were what, David? It was a veritable bloodbath.

His nuts were a veritable bloodbath after he's thus far a veritable bloodbath. After he got that vasectomy about a year ago. It was the veritable size of a truck. Yeah, truck nuts. Anyways. The veritable size of a truck. Anyways, we're having a good time. He was knocking pots.

Wondery, my final pick. At the same time, it launched the same company. And then they sued each other because they were like, it's probably a good time. He was knocking farts. Wondry, my final pick. At the same time, that launched the same company and then they sued each other because they were like, it was my idea. And he was like, it was my idea.

To put nuts on my truck? Yeah. And then they fought over it legally. Somebody wanted to own that. You were there when I thought it up, Rick. You fuck. Where's the movie? There was a podcast.

A Truck Nuts podcast? I think about, or there was a podcast. A Truck Nuts podcast? I think about, or there was a podcast about the two. I don't know why I'm still talking. Do you want me to say my pick? Is it my turn? Welcome back to These American Nuts. My name's Ira Nuss. These American Nuts.

These American Nuts. Yeah, that's my favorite joke of the whole episode. Rick Dees and the American 40 top nut. No. No, I don't get it. These American nuts is what I like. Welcome back to These American Nuts. Remember Rick Dees? Today's story in two parts.

And the weekly top 40. Yeah. Remember that? I do. I was more of a Casey Kasem guy. Okay. And so was I. You can support them both.

You can't be named Rick Dees when I was around high school age and not have me know who it was. I mean, Rick Dees. Did you ever watch the Olympics as a kid and hear Dick Button? And you were like, what are we doing? Oh, yeah. What is it? Dick Button? I heard the doctor say it first.

Dick Trickle's another crazy one. You're like, what? I'm taking Q-Bert Q-Bert is my final pick The video game character? That's right I never played that game, it was on Sega, right? The DJ and the video game Oh, and the DJ

Is it Q-Asterix B-E-R-T Is there an asterisk in there? I don't think so It's like NSYNC I thought so Not an asterisk It's just a hyphen, right?

I think it's an asterisk I thought so Q asterisk B-E-R-T He's got a nose like a wiener Do I know Cuber? Yeah, you know Cuber's got a nose like a wiener. Yeah. Do I know Q-Bert? Yeah, you know Q-Bert. He's got a nose like a wiener. He kind of looks like a snork, doesn't he? Are those the guys underwater?

It looks like they had to censor his name like it's a curse word. Or like they're tweeting about him on Twitter and they don't want him to find it by searching himself. It's not a nice thing to call aster by Shawnee people. No. Oh, I kind of recognize this guy. What did he do?

He's coming over later. That's what he does. Yeah, he just got out. He just got out. What? He jumps around blocks. I don't know what he does. You just got to jump to the top of the blocks,

and it was a color thing, right? And maybe stuff fell down. I don't know. I can't remember too well there were pitfalls and what were the contemporaries of this game what other games were people playing at the time this is way back in the day

but I'm saying is this like Blades of Steel back in the day or is this like 1982 oh I thought it was a Sega game oh dang it was it has remained it was computers am I seeing that right it was computers first No. It was. It was? It has remained.

It was computers. Am I seeing that right? It was computers first, and then it turned into a Sega game. Was it on like ColecoVision? Oh, maybe. Probably. Yeah, I remember it. I didn't really get into it too much, but I remember it for sure.

Oh, and arcades too. There was an arcade game. Mm-hmm. Well, okay. It's my final pick. It's the final pick. And was an arcade game. Well, okay. It's my final pick. It's the final pick. And you seem to know a lot about it. Qbert. Oh, wait, that's the whole thing?

That's it. That's it, huh? Damn, flew by. That's it. No, it isn't. Uh-oh. There he goes. That's all there is.

To recap, Sean, you went first. You took Quibble, Chi, Quaffaf q-tip q-doba katie you went second you took q quesadilla quesadic quash and quince or kins david you went third you took quip quinceanera coralis quell and quandary i I went last. And with my picks, I took Quintessential, Quiche, Quack, QWERTY, and Q-Bert. 20 words, beginning with Q, all alike in dignity and virtue. Super producer Isaac Lee,

it's time for your producer pick. I'm going to take Quagmire. Oh, that's a good one. Yeah, that's a great one, dude. It's a fun thing to say, too. Quagmire. Oh, that's a good one. Yeah. That's a great one, dude. It's a fun thing to say, too. Quagmire. It is. Vietnam was a real Quagmire.

I didn't know that it was a word other than Quagmire's name and family guy until my mid-20s, probably. I didn't know that it was... Probably my 30s, actually. Do you want to try to spell it? You got it, dude. Oh, you got so many shirts that say Quagmire on it you want to try to spell it? You got it, dude. You got so many shirts that say Quagmire on it. You know how to spell it. Q-U-A-G-M-I-R-E?

Come on. Yeah, dude. We want to hear yours. Send us up on All Fantasy Pod on Twitter, allfantasypodcast at gmail.com. Shout out to everyone on the AFE Patreon, where we have auction episodes, bonus episodes, live episodes, mailbags, including a special November mailbag where Katie joins us for it.

I forgot about that. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. But you know who won't? The listener. Once they enjoy all at least 60 minutes of fun that we had on there. Yeah.

Shout out to... Oh, also, I mean mean in addition to all that, of course, our Patreon is the only place you can get Super Bruiser Isaac's very tasteful nudes. That's right. Put a lot of effort into it. Do you guys get them for free? I wouldn't. Or do you have to pay to be paid? We pay. We pay. Absolutely.

I know my worth. I know my value. That's good, Isaac. That's really good. And I love that. The only thing soft is the lighting. It's a fun sort of autumnal series this month. It's great. There's a lot of strategically placed fallen leaves. There's a lot of not strategically placed fallen leaves.

Oh, yes. Yeah. Some sweater action. And let's just say the turkey on the table isn't the only thing you'll be thankful for this month. Damn. My goodness. A couple of drug sticks. Bad,

bad dude. Wishbone. I'm wearing a turtleneck, but you don't know where. It's on his dick. It's kind of crazy, and I was averse to it at first, but once you kind of like

let the art of it wash over you. Arguably the worst shirt traditionally to rock bottomless. It's the most cartoonish. It is the most perverted. It's the most perverted thing you can rock bottom. You can't see my neck, but check out my dick. What are you doing?

I don't want to stretch the neck out. What are you doing has anyone ever talked to a turtle like a nobler oh my god all the time oh my god yeah when he's sleeping with groupies after those events that he hosts

shout out to everyone on the AFB slackity the AFE subreddit shout out to super producer Isaac Lee and the ones and twos. Shout out to St. Sue Carmel. Shout out to Frankie Ocean. Shout out to Haji B.

Shout out to Sid the Dude. More important than all of that, tune in again next week for another brand new episode of All Fantasy Everything. Shacklackity! that was a hate gum podcast