American Presidents: Totalus Rankium - 1.2 George Washington
Episode Date: March 17, 2018We finish off Washington’s busy life by looking into how he went from winning the war, to being president. It was not an easy journey - there was political infighting, rebellions, the French, the B...ritish and so many distracting ladies. How is one supposed to set up a brand new republic in such conditions?Â
Transcript
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Welcome to Totalus Rankium. This week, George Washington Part 2.
Hello and welcome to American Presidents Totalus Rankium. I am Jamie.
And I'm Rob, ranking all of the presidents from Washington to Trump.
And this is episode 1.2.
Ooh.
George Washington, part 2.
I'm quite excited about this because my opinion of him changed.
I don't have much of an opinion to start with, I'll be honest.
No.
But.
Blank slate. I start a bit of a kind of a, haha, idiot. Yeah. To sort of, oh actually. opinion of him changed i don't have much of an opinion to start with i'll be honest no but blank
slate starts a bit of a kind of a idiot yeah to sort of oh actually he's got some smarts so you're
thinking is that gonna continue or was that the peak i hope he doesn't start to crest yeah when
the wave you know hits yeah hits his peak and then starts to fold under itself and then crash down
into a seal well Well let's see if
if that happens literally or metaphorically. As you have hinted at of course we covered his early
life last episode. His rise as a gentleman after marrying Martha. Then the start of the war. We
briefly covered how he won by refusing to give up until the French turned up and helped him out.
Yeah. So today we're going to see what happened to him after the war
and how exactly he became president and what did he do when he did.
Interesting.
So picture the scene.
Got it.
You're already picturing it.
That's good.
Might be slightly different to what you're thinking.
Okay.
Well, Yorktown is what I'm thinking.
Smouldering ruin.
Ooh.
Burnt wood. The dead litter the fields. thinking. Smouldering ruin. Ooh. Burnt wood.
The dead litter the fields.
Ooh.
You shouldn't litter.
I'm going to get told off for that.
Yeah.
The battle is over.
The war is technically not.
Okay.
Although this is the last major conflict of the war.
After this, the British eventually pull out.
I wouldn't say we didn't lose or pull out, we just
we're biding our time.
We'll see
in future episodes how the British
deal with this loss.
Well, it's a tactical retreat. Yeah, a tactical
retreat. So,
the British are pulling back to New
York at this point, so they're still on the continent.
Everyone's decided, shall we just stop
fighting? And we'll let the diplomats work things out in Paris? Fair enough. But the army
was not happy. Many of the men were owed a huge amount of money. Congress had no money to pay.
Well, I spent it on the war, I'm guessing. Yeah, let's face it, the colonies didn't really have
that much money and war is very expensive.
Now, there were still 26,000 British troops hanging around, but the French had gone.
Oh.
Yeah.
There was no kind of party victory atmosphere going on here. The war may have unofficially ended, but everyone is still on edge, and whispers start to spread amongst the men.
Philadelphia has no
intention of paying them
their due. They needed to do
something while they still had
weapons. Oh dear. Realising
that something had to be done, Washington
arranged a meeting for the officers to
air their grievances to a spokesman.
Barely sensible. Yeah. He'd caught
wind of some illegal meetings going
on. Ooh. So he thought
well let's do a formal meeting and then let's
bring it out in the open. Yeah. Yeah.
Stop it going underground. Do you think they had to
pass around a little toy on who could speak?
It was that. You're holding the teddy, you can speak.
It was that kind of meeting, yeah. Nice.
Yeah. Very organised. Guy holding a bear.
I'm feeling a bit anxious and a bit angry
because I feel like I should have been paid.
And I feel like, oh, can I just...
No, you don't have the bear!
Sit down!
Has the bear got a little Continental Army coat on?
Yes.
Oh, that's nice.
And a blue jacket.
Slightly war-torn, arm like half off, threadbare.
Yeah.
He's seen a lot.
What was hell?
Yeah.
So anyway, the officers gathered,
fully prepared for that style of meeting.
That's the kind of meeting they'd had before.
However, before they could arrange the chairs in a circle
and pass around the talking bear,
none other than George Washington himself walked in.
And no one was expecting him to be there.
This is the leader of the Continental Army.
Everyone was expecting someone lower down to be dealing with this.
So, a sudden shock arrival.
The room hushed.
Shh! He's here! He's here!
He's here! Washington stood
in front of his near-mutinous
men and started to speak.
He started by telling
them off a little bit, basically.
What's all this about all this rumours
of mutiny then, chaps?
But he soon started to work in some emotional
blackmail. Nice.
He said, and I quote,
As I have been a constant
companion and witness to your distress,
it can scarcely be supposed
at this late stage of the war
that I am indifferent
to your interests.
I've got your back, guys. Don't worry.
We're in this together.
Some of the crowd seemed to be swayed, but not everyone.
Still some...
In the background.
He continued by talking about patriotism,
about the dangers of civil war.
And then he pulled out a letter from Congress.
He wanted to make sure the soldiers knew that Congress knew about their grievances.
However, Washington found the letter
quite hard to read. The handwriting was
small and cramped. So he
pulled out his glasses. The men had
never seen him wearing spectacles before.
So a murmur goes round.
Blah, blah, blah, glasses, glasses,
spectacles. Washington
looked up and said, and
again I quote,
Gentlemen, you must pardon me.
I have grown grey in your service and now find myself going blind.
So he suffers from a bit of long-sightedness.
But he's using that to his advantage.
Oh yes, because at this point the officers are said to have been reduced to tears.
Washington quickly realised he was onto something here.
I'd like to think at that point he just, like,
bashes his leg against the nearby table.
Oh, and my leg as well. My leg went...
Hobbles over.
Hand behind his back. Lost my arm as well.
I got quite a mighty paper cut the other week as well, guys.
And I bloody well stubbed that toe.
Stubbed it right good the nails gone all
black i'm worried it's gonna fall off yeah so uh this sort of diffused the situation that's good
so he knows that he needs to be a man of the people yeah which you really don't get that
feeling when you look at his early life no not at all no so he's he's learned from this war but
he did spend his time up the hills, the Bunker Hill thing.
He spent his time with the troops without any money, with no ammunition.
Yeah, exactly.
And Valley Forge in particular was a tough time.
There was another winter that was just as bad as Valley Forge
that I didn't have time to talk about.
He's gone through a lot with these men.
So he's able to show that
and the men are one round.
So there you go. He stops there.
What could have easily turned into a mutiny
and then who knows?
The army could have turned against
itself. Civil War. The British
are still there. USA as we know it
probably wouldn't have happened.
Just because George Washington put on his spectacles.
Nice. Yeah.
By this time peace talks in Paris had concluded.
Didn't know in the US,
because there was about a two-month delay on news back then.
Yeah, of course.
But yeah, the peace talks had finished.
The British would recognise the United States of America.
Washington, back stateside, therefore, was able to disband his army.
Oh.
Over time, men were released from duty.
The British pull out of New York and Washington moves in.
Then in December 1783, he formally resigns as commander-in-chief of the Continental Forces
and becomes a civilian once more.
The men who were there openly cried.
Apparently, his head of intelligence, Benjamin Talmadge, wrote,
Such a scene of sorrow and weeping I have never before witnessed. openly cried, apparently. His head of intelligence, Benjamin Talmadge, wrote, George himself, however,
by this point, just longed to be
at home. He'd had enough.
I want to go back to my farm,
watch my slaves farm. That's all I want.
That's a simple lie.
He was growing increasingly wary
of the celebrity that he now had.
He was finding it hard to get through a week
without having to attend several formal dinners.
Life's so hard.
I know.
All this foie gras.
And so he resigns.
This stepping down of power has rightly been pointed out
as a highlight in his career.
Because this is quite phenomenal.
Humility.
Well, as we've seen in our
Roman Empire series, how often
does a man with the most
power in the country just give it up?
Once. Twice that I've got.
Oh, you've got twice. Yes.
Diocletian and Sulla
are the only two men we have covered.
Sulla, yeah. Well, Diocletian
is the only Roman Emperor. Yeah, yeah.
But the people in this time
In early US history
Don't like the Roman empires
That's imperial, that's Britain
People back in this time
Were obsessed with the Roman Republic
Really?
Oh yes, they really were
When I say people, the rich, educated men
Were obsessed with the Roman Republic
That explains a lot You get your Republic. That explains a lot.
You get your Senate and you...
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely.
That makes a lot of sense now.
Yeah.
So the only two people we have covered who have volunteered to give up power
are Diocletian and Sulla.
Right.
Now, Diocletian was a Roman emperor.
That's imperial.
So the Americans weren't too keen to emulate Diocletian.
Sulla, as we have learnt, was a bit of a psychopathic murderer.
So let's not aspire to be him.
But there is one person
who we've not covered yet
in our Roman Republic podcast,
but we will do at some point.
This is a man named Cincinnatus.
Is that why Cincinnati's named?
Yes.
Oh, wow!
Yeah.
This is a figure we've, as I say, we've not covered,
but essentially he raised an army, he fought against the enemies of Rome,
he put down some rebellions, and then afterwards he retired to his farm.
Nice.
Yes.
Cincinnati was held up in the 1780s as a hero of republican virtue.
Wow.
So you can guess who everyone started comparing Washington to.
After winning lots of wars for the republic,
Washington also was going to retire back to his firm.
His wish was to return to his life before the war.
But he soon found that this was impossible.
Because before the war, he was well known in the country,
but he could just get on with things.
He is now the most famous person on the continent.
Over the next couple of years,
Mount Vernon came to resemble a hotel
for all visitors that passed who wanted to pay their respects.
Now, etiquette said back then,
if a guest showed up on your door,
of course you took them in, you fed them, you housed them.
It's just the way things were.
It's expensive, though, isn't it?
Oh, yes. Especially when you've constantly got people.
It was so busy, according to his diary, it was over a year after returning home before George managed to have dinner with Martha just on his own.
Wow.
Yeah. George wasn't rude to the visitors, but unsurprisingly, he was hardly the
life and soul of the party each night. He had a life to lead. He couldn't be there being the best
host every single night. So you got mixed reports. Some people would turn up and say he was an
amazing host. What a gentleman. Some people would come away thinking, who is this grumpy buffoon?
Makes sense, though. Yeah, definitely. It makes sense it makes sense after a while however he got so fed up with the constant visitors that he purposely
put up misleading signs near his house nice sending possible visitors through bogs and thick
woods before they'd arrive at the house excellent people just turn up at the doorstep just the hair all over the place rips
in their clothes alligator such yeah yeah just pounding on the door the bear's coming the bear's
coming it's around this time that we start to see evidence that his opinions on slavery have
changed slightly in a positive way oh yes definitely yes, definitely. Possibly due to... We'll see. Possibly due to his closeness of his subordinates,
such as Lafayette and Hamilton, who hated slavery,
Washington seems to have come out of the war
feeling somewhat uncomfortable with the practice.
Interesting.
Now, that's not to say he did anything about it, however.
When his good friend Lafayette wrote to him
saying that he should free his slaves, Lafayette wrote to him saying that he should free his slaves.
Lafayette had recently freed his slaves.
Lafayette was purposely buying slaves to free them all over the world.
He's like Oskar Schindler.
Well, yeah, yeah.
Lafayette was really doing his best to free slaves,
and he wrote to Washington and said,
You are so famous in America that you doing this now would inspire others to do it.
Washington politely brushes the subject to one side. I would, but, you know, that tobacco is not
going to pick itself, is it? Yeah, essentially. He did start informing certain members of his staff
that he did plan to free his slaves at some point. A hundred or so years. I'll think about it.
Yeah.
Now, the fact that he didn't free his slaves is perhaps because he was stone broke.
Everyone assumed he was fabulously rich.
He was the leader of the Continental Army.
He had this massive mansion, huge, huge tracts of land.
Of course, he must be rich.
But no, he didn't get paid to be the leader of the Continental Army.
And as we discussed last week,
his farm wasn't actually doing too well.
So he probably personally saw it as not economically viable
to be doing anything about the slaves.
He may at this point have had difficulty morally justifying
to himself owning people,
but he found the idea of losing his
prestige even more abhorrent.
Waste of gentlemen.
So, in 1782,
a law was passed that gave masters the
right to free their slaves, and anti-slavery
groups start springing up all over the country,
including in Virginia.
And they targeted, albeit subtly,
George Washington.
In 1785, a guest arrived at the house.
Hardly surprising, they kept turning up all the time.
But this guest had many books on emancipation.
Which I like to think he just sort of casually left lying around the house.
I'll just leave that there.
One in the toilet.
Yeah.
Yeah, one in the dining table.
Washington, for weeks afterwards,
would just keep stumbling across books on emancipation.
What the hell?
Lies down on his bed.
Oh, it's in the pillowcase.
Yeah.
Yeah.
There's one inside his shoe, so he can't get his foot in.
Oh, that's awkward.
Yeah.
Quite a small book, that one.
Yeah.
Just a piece of paper that says,
Free the slaves.
Yeah.
Get it.
Brackets.
A Quaker plantation owner in Virginia at this point also freed 78 of his own slaves
and then publicly proclaimed that Washington failing to follow suit
would leave an everlasting stain on Washington's legacy.
Which turns out to be 100% accurate.
Washington unfortunately continues for the rest of his life
to denounce slavery in words but support it indeed.
Washington needs some money. As I said, he didn't get paid during the war and now he has to pay for
the revolving door of guests and tourists feeding at his table. Brightside, he's got lots of land
and he does have these slaves that can work so he was determined to make a profit for once. He
throws himself into modernising his farm,
researching new methods, theories and technologies
that might help improve the situation.
I've heard about this.
He's a moderniser of equipment.
Yeah, yeah.
That's ringing something.
As I said, guests got a mixed picture of him,
but apparently one of the few times he really came alive
was when people talk about things like crop cycles and
stuff. His passion was farming at this point. He really, really wanted to make a go at making it
work. Whether it's because he had genuine interest or whether he was just going, oh my god, I'm so
poor. It's hard to tell. Maybe I'll think my way out of this. Yeah. It's around this time that
Washington heads out to go and see some land that he owns in western Pennsylvania.
He got some new land before the war.
He thought, let's go and actually see what's there.
Maybe I can make some money out of this.
He gets there and finds some people living on it.
So he points out that that's his land and the people say, no, it's not.
Washington politely asks them to move and they politely say no.
So a legal battle starts
that drags on for quite some time.
Eventually George does win
and allows the people who live there
to stay there and rent off him.
That's nice. That is quite nice. Good money making
as well. I say this but
I've seen that written down
in two places but I did see in one place
that he actually chucked them off the land.
So a bit of a contradiction there, but
I'm fairly sure he'd let them stay.
It makes sense, because you get money from that.
Yeah, why would you, if you've got a paying tenant,
why would you uproot them? But what this
does show, though, is that he is
clearly desperate for money at this point.
Meanwhile, in Massachusetts,
there is trouble. Oh dear.
The state, like most, were in heavy debt after the war.
So they levied some heavy taxes.
We all know how the Americans love their taxes.
Yeah.
Enraging many, ex-soldiers and farmers alike joined forces and marched on courthouses across the state.
A real fear of anarchy started to take hold as courts were unable to operate and mob rule seemed to take over.
Oh dear.
This is known as Shays' Rebellion after the leading instigator.
What was his name?
Bill.
Okay.
Yeah.
Henry Knox.
I heard that name.
Oh, yes.
If you remember, he's the one who arrived near Boston
with the cannons.
Yeah, yeah.
Muscles rippling.
Oh, yeah.
Pulling them behind him.
Everyone was mightily impressed back then.
Well, Henry Knox was sent to go and sort them out.
But many people wanted Washington sent to go and sort them out. But many people
wanted Washington himself to go up North.
Washington was the face
of respectability, after all.
George was shocked by
this turn of events when he found out,
and I quote, but for God's sake,
what is the course of this commotion?
Yeah, what's going on?
Well, he wanted to know what the grievances were,
and if the people had real grievances, why hadn't they been dealt with sooner?
And why had the uprising been left to fester for so long?
Why hadn't it been put down?
To which he pulled out his little teddy bear, ready for the meeting.
Come on, let's talk about this.
Let's have another meeting, guys.
Packed away some glasses and a crutch.
All his props.
Not for the first time, George was frustrated by the lack
of any real federal government that could rule over the 13 states. The Continental Congress that
had formed to talk about British taxation and led to independence was turning out to be a very weak
form of government for the new country. Now known as the Confederation Congress, it had very little power to enforce individual states to do anything.
It was seen as a political dead end,
and the best men stayed in the states,
and they sent, like, the losers to go and be in the federal governments, essentially.
As proved by the problems in Massachusetts,
this federal government, which didn't have any form of executive branch,
was unable to act decisively,
and it was declining in power.
It didn't help that it had no power to raise taxes,
meaning that it had to rely on individual states
just giving it money to survive.
As you can probably imagine,
the individual states just didn't.
Yeah, it just was a failing government.
That's not to say, however,
that there wasn't support for a strong federal government.
It's just this one wasn't it. Many wanted to look at the Articles of Confederation and see if they
could make some amendments, see if they could improve it. Surely we can do better than this.
So in 1786, Alexander Hamilton, who had been working as one of Washington's aides for a large
portion of the war, called a meeting where the leading men in each
state would see if they could make this thing work. Come on, let's get our heads together and
knock a few heads together. Yeah. Lock the doors until we can come up with a solution for this.
This obviously only works if the meeting was seen by all to have a bit of weight behind it,
a bit of gravitas. Yeah. In an age where everything was brand new and there were no precedents it was
very hard to argue that this meeting was even legal let alone something that should we listen
to so so what's the best way how can they get a bit of bit of oomph behind this meeting get
important people to go and who is the most important person george the third those people
were hushed very quickly. Kill him!
You've not been listening for the last few years, have you?
Mr Washington, I believe.
Of course, yes.
So, Washington was asked, will you attend?
George was not keen on the idea.
He wanted to retire.
He wanted to work on his new pet project,
turning the Potomac River that ran by his house into the opening of a major canal system.
However, in the end he was persuaded
not only that he would lead
the Virginia delegation. Eventually
as the start of the convention drew closer
Washington became more and more
interested in the political shape of
any future government. So he was unsure
to begin with, but he was starting to
get a bit interested here.
Well, one of his friends, a man
named John Jay,
who had been involved in the Treaty of Paris,
sent Washington an outline of a possible future government
that was doing the rounds.
This involved a Congress that would make laws,
a separate judiciary that would judge for laws,
and an independent executive branch
that would just sort of run the services of the country.
And that part would have one single president to rule it.
This was the idea most people were going towards.
The details, however, needed to be ironed out.
And that's what the whole convention was about.
In May 1787, Washington was ill.
He had violent headaches and stomach aches, but they could delay no longer. So the
Virginian delegates set off for Philadelphia. Washington with one of those ice packs on his
head, probably. Oh, yeah. A warm thing on his tummy. One of those hot microwavable bears. Oh,
yeah. Yeah. There's a little blue uniform still. Yeah, yeah. He's got loads of those. Washington
was therefore probably greatly annoyed that the Virginians were one of the few states that arrived on time.
Damn you!
Could have delayed it for a bit. Everyone else was late.
So the Virginians spent their time formulating what they wanted from this convention.
They approved of Jay's vision of government, but they put their own spin on it.
They wanted Congress to have two houses
using proportional representation. Virginia, having the largest population, would definitely
benefit from such a proposal. The more people in a state, the more representation in the government,
the more power they had. Makes sense, if you're from Virginia. Eventually, other states start to arrive, and they started their meetings.
The first point of order was to elect a president of the convention.
Washington was the only real choice.
The convention unanimously voted him as president.
And so the convention gets underway.
The idea was to amend the Articles of Confederation,
but it soon became clear to all involved
the best way to improve this, quite frankly, pathetic government we have
is to tear it apart and start again.
Makes sense.
Yeah.
The convention lasted several months.
By the end of it, the Constitution of the United States was written.
Now, we simply don't have time to go through all the drama
that took place in Philadelphia over the summer of 1787,
but let's just look at some of the highlights.
The meetings took place between 10 and 4 each day.
That's good.
Nice work if you can get it.
Then the unofficial part of the day would start, which was just as important,
as people used dinner parties to socialise and attempt to politically sway discussions.
George took his role as president very seriously,
acting like a stern teacher.
One day, a delegate from Georgia
dropped some proposed resolutions whilst he was out.
It had been agreed that the convention
would not make anything public
until a final decision had been made.
George was outraged that some of the discussion
had been leaked.
So the next day, when everyone was together, he said, and I quote,
Gentlemen, I'm sorry to find that some one member of this body
has been so neglectful of secrets of the convention
as to drop a copy of their proceedings,
which by accident was picked up and delivered to me this morning.
I must entreat gentlemen to be more careful,
lest our transactions get into the newspapers
and disturb the public repose by premature speculation.
I know not whose paper it is,
but there it is.
At this point, he throws it down on the table in front of him.
Nice.
Let him who owns it take it. At that point there was just
complete silence. No one dares to own up that it's their paper. One person thought they'd lost their
paper and slightly sort of edged forward and breathed a huge sigh of relief when they realised
that, oh, that's not my paper. It's not my name on the front. In the end, no one owns up, so Washington just storms out of the room, leaving everyone feeling
like schoolboys. Excellent. Washington had managed by this point in his life to get to the position
where everyone felt like he was the natural leader. He was somehow above everyone else.
Some people did rebel against this idea, however. One delegate, a man named Morris, stated
that this was nonsense. That he
would be as familiar with Washington
than with anyone else. Hamilton
heard this and made a bet with him.
He said that he, Hamilton,
would buy dinner for everyone present
if the next time Washington entered the room
Morris would walk up to him, slap
him on the shoulder, and say,
My dear General, how happy I am that you look so well.
Morris accepts the bet.
Nice.
And sure enough, when Washington walks into the room...
Oh, what daring times they lived in.
I know.
Do you think it was a game of spin the bottle, truth or dare?
You've got to wish Washington well.
Well, Morris, he's a brave man, is Morris
Washington walks into the room
Morris stands up, walks straight up to him
Slaps him on the arm
Says, Washington
How glad I am to see that you are so well
What do you think happened?
It would be really funny
Just taken down by guards
And killed
No, I mean this is before people had guards.
Or Washington just looked and he wilted.
Oh, you've got it spot on.
Really?
Washington just turns around and gives him such an icy stare.
Morris just backs away.
Nice.
I couldn't find out whether Hamilton had to deliver on the bet
because Morris did go and do it.
Yeah.
At least he's won the bet.
He won the bet.
Maybe Hamilton tries to say,
OK, I'll do it now.
But Morris is like, no, no, no, don't talk about it.
No, you don't want to talk about it.
We never discuss this ever again.
It didn't happen.
So after a while, discussions start in earnest.
The Virginian delegation, now led by a man named Madison,
might want to make a note of his name.
Name rings a bell.
Yes.
Madison's in charge because Washington's now the president,
so he has to take a back seat.
He's got to remain neutral.
So Madison's now in charge of the Virginians,
and he makes it clear that they wanted the proportional representation
in the houses of Congress.
This was met with stony contempt by the smaller states that's not fair what about us what about
the little guys yeah they said in unison it was a bit weird yeah almost choreographed yeah it's
the dance in the middle yes one delaware delegate got up at this point and simply stated, I do not, gentlemen, trust you.
The burns were harsh.
Yeah.
There was genuine fear that the smaller states were just going to break away and form their own country at this point.
Or perhaps even worse, attempt to join another country.
Join France or go back to Britain even.
There was definitely this fear that this isn't going to work.
Things were looking bleak.
New Jersey proposed that each state would have an equal say.
Every state will put forth the same amount of people into Congress.
You can imagine how this went down with the larger states.
No, you little states are not dictating what we're going to do.
So things are not going well.
In fact, the convention seems to be making things worse.
Washington started relying on Alexander Hamilton for more and more advice at this point,
writing to him after he'd returned to New York for a while,
I am so sorry that you went away.
This is where we first start to see Hamilton rising in Washington's esteem.
The two of them were increasingly finding that their views for a strong national government
matched quite closely.
However, in July, there was finally a breakthrough.
There would be a legislative branch that would make laws, and it would have two houses, just
like the British system, the lower house, the House of Representatives, and the upper
house, the Senate.
And yes, their obsession with the Romans comes through again there.
Where the compromise came was how the representation would work. The House,
the House of Representatives, would be proportional. A percentage of the House
seats would go to each state depending on population. The Senate would have two seats
per state. This led to a disagreement over population sizes. You spot what the problem's
going to be? You've got a state with just two people in them.
It's not that.
The southern states were adamant
that their slaves should count as population.
Ah, I'm with you.
Yeah.
Now, OK, in every other sense,
we regard them as property,
but if it helps us, of course they're people.
Yeah.
Was essentially their argument.
They walk on two legs.
Yeah.
The northern states, obviously opposed to this,
these were mainly smaller states with smaller populations,
they also had far, far fewer slaves,
so would have less representation.
Therefore, the north found themselves arguing
that slaves should not count as people,
whilst at the same time,
the south were continuing to defend a slave economy.
I'd like to think at least one person in
the room at this point just stopped just for a moment to really appreciate how awful this moment
was. That's genuinely horrific. Yeah, there's no good side in this. No. No. You can't shine it up.
Yeah, well, a compromise takes place. Compromise is usually quite good, yeah? Yeah.
This is a bit of a blight, shall we say, to say the least.
All states would count their free population,
and then they would add three-fifths of their slave population.
Oh.
So in the Constitution, it essentially states
that black people are worth three-fifths of white people.
Wow.
Yes.
Isn't that slim there, isn't it?
Oh, yes.
Oh.
Yeah.
That's a bit uncomfortable.
A little bit.
Is that still legal?
Well, there are no slaves, so that doesn't count anymore.
Okay.
So it's declared very clearly, slaves.
Well, no, the word slaves is not used.
They had a meeting to discuss whether they should use the word slaves.
They kind of realised that using the word slaves is not a good idea.
No, I can't remember the exact wording.
I forgot to put a note down,
but it's along the lines of people who are forced to work.
It's a really rubbish euphemism that they've got in there.
That's absolutely shocking.
Now, of course, this isn't to say everyone was happy with this.
I mean, obviously, people weren't.
It wasn't long after this was written that someone described it as an agreement with hell.
It was generally seen as not good.
But it was the compromise that was made on the day.
Talk then turned to the executive branch.
There was real fear of the higher classes in the country
turning the US into a monarchy at this point,
which might seem crazy nowadays,
but back then it was a justifiable fear.
Well, it happened all the way through the Roman Empire, didn't it?
They didn't want kings.
They were scared of kings.
They didn't want it because it brought about the bad days.
Exactly.
The parallels.
There are so many of them.
There was a lot of discussion as to how
much power the president of the United States should have. Washington at this point remained
mostly silent. It was an unspoken agreement by this time that the first president was going to
be Washington. So he just had to sit in this meeting, lead the meeting whilst people decided
what his job was going to be essentially. One of the few times he did comment was when one delegate
tried to limit the size of the Federal Army to 3,000 men.
They did not like the idea of a big standing army.
That's what Britain had.
We're not Britain.
We're better than that.
We're a republic.
We rely on militias.
Washington, being a leader of armies, realised that militias are a bit rubbish
and having a standing army is a good idea.
He would know, that's from his
experience.
So he replied, should no foreign army
invade the United States at any time
with no more than 3,000 men
that would be fine.
Which I quite like as a reply.
Little dig.
Eventually, however, it was all ironed
out. In September 1787, the Constitution was finally agreed upon.
It was decided that nine states had to ratify it before it became law.
Washington heads home.
On the way back, two of his horses fell off a bridge.
Yes, nearly pulling his carriage into the river.
Oh, right.
Yes, no, it was quite dangerous.
A lucky escape for him there. Especially, like, back in his farm. Just river. Oh, right, okay. Yes, no, it was quite dangerous. A lucky escape for him there.
Especially, like, back in his farm.
Just two horses randomly found the bridge.
Just two horses in the distance.
Nice silhouette.
The sun's setting.
Oh, look, two horses on that bridge.
Oh, dear.
Yay!
So he's back home.
He's in Mount Vernon.
By January 1788, Pennsylvania, New Jersey, Delaware, Georgia, and Connecticut had all
ratified. Washington's nerves start to build. He must have been in agony waiting to see if he would
be president by this point. He also realized if Virginia didn't ratify, he couldn't really take
the job. He can't be president if his state's not going to ratify. So he starts trying to convince
people in Virginia
of the strength of the constitution. Although in private, he did worry that it wasn't going to last.
Yes, he had some private reservations, but he did not let that show. By May, Massachusetts,
Maryland and South Carolina had signed up. Only one more state needed to ratify for it to take hold. Virginia held its meeting to discuss whether
to ratify. And after four days, it was finally decided that they would indeed be the ninth
state. And therefore, the constitution would be taken on nationwide.
Nice. That's where Dan came from. What about the states that didn't ratify and didn't agree
with it?
Ah, well, come to that. Because at this point, someone rushed into the meeting to announce that New Hampshire had ratified a couple of days ago.
Oh.
Which must have really taken the wind out of some sails.
We are the ninth. We are the ones who made our New Hampshire.
Got that before us.
Get me all to hell.
Fine, we'll be tenth then.
New York followed soon after.
So that's 11 states ratified.
Only two have not.
Interesting.
But that's enough.
It's done.
Only nine needed to do it.
The Constitution has taken effect.
A president needs to be found.
Now who could we pick?
Said Washington looking around all theatrically.
Can't think who.
Wishing that there was a president uniform already that he could wear to the first meeting.
He'd made himself a badge, but it was a bit, you know, a bit handmade.
Just said top pres on it.
Yeah, little star.
Little picture of Lincoln.
Washington found himself on the verge of becoming president of a new nation.
But equally, he was not 100% certain if he actually really wanted this job.
There was a lot of doubt.
Understandably, this is a big undertaking.
Also, his farm's not doing very well.
Of course.
Yeah.
He just wasn't sure if anyone would live up to this pressure.
He wasn't entirely convinced the Constitution would work.
But in the end,
he was persuaded, mainly by himself, that someone had to do this job, and there was no one better
to do it than Washington at this time. And if this country was going to work, he had to step up
and make it work. It helped that when the election came, he was elected unanimously by the Electoral College. Washington being the only president
in history to achieve this.
Nice. So, he heads to New York
where it was decided the president would reside.
Travelling became a nightmare.
If he was fed up with being a celebrity before
it became even worse now.
Wherever he went, crowds gathered
and formal dinners were hosted.
Eventually, he makes it to New York.
Washington moves into Three Cherry Street,
which is near the modern Brooklyn Bridge,
which is also near where he made
his daring escape during the war.
That's nice. Yeah. A large city
house that opened right onto the
street, interestingly.
Wow, yeah. Once there, he started to work on
his inaugural speech. A large
portion was spent on defending
his decision to be the president,
almost as if he was embarrassed that
he was doing it. Well, I guess
this is like a rumour of him wanting to be king.
Exactly, and that's what he was worried about.
Eventually, it was decided
this speech was a little bit weak.
A bit defensive. Yeah.
So a shorter, more punchy speech was written
by James Madison.
What's that name again?
I'm the president.
I'm now your... Your kindly president.
Yeah.
The speech was delivered on a balcony of the town hall to the street below.
Back then, few people could have heard his speech.
That's good.
Yeah.
But many people were mightily impressed with how noble and stately he looked.
Yeah.
He cut a fine figure.
He raised his arm.
Yeah.
Party atmosphere.
Everyone's really happy.
Yay.
Once he read the oath that had been prepared, the crowd started shouting,
Huzzah! Huzzah! Long live George Washington!
Aww.
Which is quite nice.
Just love how British they sound there.
Tally-ho, good sir.
We wish you well.
Then the job of putting together a brand new government starts. The most important posts were those of the Treasury Secretary,
the Secretary of State, and the Secretary of War.
Secretary of State?
Yes.
That's like Rex Tillerson, maybe.
He sees one currently, isn't he?
Well, as of five minutes ago, yes.
For the Treasury, he chose
Hamilton. Fair enough.
Who had proved himself to be
insanely hardworking,
and had a vision he really wanted to push
that chimed with Washington's.
For the State Department, he chose
Thomas Jefferson, who had just
come back from France. And as
for war, it was Knox.
Oh, yeah. Couldn't be anyone else, could it?
That image of him dragging back those cannons still seared into everyone's memory.
However, it's Hamilton and Jefferson who really shine at this point.
Not only are they both incredibly good at their jobs, they also hate each other.
Oh, nice.
They have very different visions for the new country that will dominate for the next few episodes because their two visions
form two different political parties. The donkeys and the elephants? Well, no, this is the Federalists
and the Republicans, but not quite the Republicans As we know them. History books
Sometimes refer to them as the Democratic
Republicans just to confuse everyone
Even though they're not Democrats or Republicans
Okay. Yeah
Just elephant with like
Sunglasses and a fake nose
Okay. Yeah
Not quite Republicans as we know them
Fair enough. This will become clearer as we go
Through the episodes.
Now, Washington was aware of their rivalry, but he wanted different opinions around him.
He also hated party politics.
He thought it was undemocratic.
So he wanted people of different opinions to be around him.
Yeah, two different opinions.
Yeah, exactly.
Now, this is something he slowly abandons as things get more politically murky and difficult over his time as president.
But it starts off this way.
Now, not only is the big stuff going on.
You've got to realise that you're setting up a government here.
You've got to do all the big things, but you've also got to do all of the little things.
There are no precedents whatsoever.
So, for example, no one knew how to address Washington.
Georgie Boy was scratched off the list straight away.
El Presidente. Yeah, that one went quite
quickly. The vice
president, a man named John Adams,
wanted something with dignity.
His Excellency Protector
of Liberties. Ooh, that's
nice. George shut that down right
away. No, you
can call me, get this, the President of the
United States, because I'm the President
of the United States. That makes'm the President of the United States.
That makes sense.
Yeah, and everyone went, oh, okay.
That makes more sense.
I suppose so.
The days tick by and routines gradually start.
The house that they were in was far too small
for all the people who lived and worked there,
and it did not help that one of the secretaries
was also writing a play at the time
and would walk the corridors at night reciting his lines.
That's hilarious.
A story that really sums up what this new government was like.
It feels a bit slapdash at the moment, doesn't it?
A bit part-time.
Yeah.
The president spends two days a week in the office and then the rest of the time farming.
They're starting.
Yeah.
They're getting up on their feet.
Every Tuesday, Washington would allow people from the public to come and talk to him.
Nice. He really did not want to be seen as royal.
The people needed access to him. Yeah.
So the doors of his drawing room would
open at three o'clock every Tuesday
and Washington would be stood each time
by the fireplace
with a ceremonial sword
wearing a black velvet suit.
Nice. Oh yes.
That is cool.
Oh, I love it. Image of him silhouetted against the fire there in his black velvet suit. Nice. Oh, yes. That is cool. Oh, I love it.
Image of him silhouetted against the fire there in his black velvet suit.
Gleaming sword.
And if you're wearing a black velvet suit, it's obviously going to be flared.
Oh, yes.
I have no evidence of this, but there's no way they're not flared.
No, of course.
So that's what Washington's wearing.
That's amazing.
Massive lapels.
Yes.
He would listen for an hour, and then at four o'clock sharp, he would leave.
So as I was saying, oh, hello?
Oh, he's gone.
Georgie boy.
No.
His excellence.
Ironically, he was criticised by some for this,
saying this was a bit too much like holding court,
a bit too much like being a king.
He was a bit damned if he did, damned if he didn't. It was George Washington at this point. But I see it as an attempt
to try and actually see the people. Yeah. Yeah. So that's how it all started off. But
it's not long before the first crisis. Washington became ill. Oh no. So ill that people feared
for his life. The street outside was closed completely and covered in straw so he could get more rest.
What? Oh, footsteps.
Yes, exactly.
That's brilliant.
Not the image you really want to portray.
No.
Do you think, like, before people walked onto the street,
there's just, like, a row of guards, you know,
put sponges on your shoes, put the horse mufflers on.
Yeah.
You there, yes, you, the tap dancer,
you're not coming down here.
Go around.
Put the trombone away.
Are they bagpipes?
Yeah, Washington was not in a good way.
He had a huge abscess
in his thigh.
That had to be operated on.
Oh, not then. Oh yes, a doctor
was called to remove this.
The doctor declared
that he, the doctor,
was too old to go through such an ordeal.
That's...
That's not what you want to hear your doctor saying.
I'm too old for this.
How old are you?
24.
Well, the doctor said, don't worry, my son will do the surgery.
The son cut into Washington's leg.
And the doctor said, cut deeper still.
See how well he bears the pain.
It's not an experiment.
Keep going until he goes out.
Until he's weeping.
It's not deep enough.
Yeah, this was incredibly painful for Washington.
Of course it was.
He was bedridden for weeks afterwards.
This is not the best of starts.
But the work obviously could not stop. In order
to appease those still not happy with the Constitution, don't forget North Carolina and
Rhode Island had not ratified still. And there was quite a bit of grumbling. There was a lot of people
in all the states that had ratified that still weren't really happy. So to try and appease these
people, 17 amendments were drafted. Now Washington and others realised the obvious weakness of a written constitution.
A written constitution has its strengths, but its obvious weakness is that it is inflexible.
And you need to have some bend for things that change over time.
So they took this into account.
And there is a way to change the constitution through amendments.
You can make changes should you need to.
So straight away it was decided let's make some amendments.
Let's show that this amendment process can work.
So 17 amendments were drafted.
This was then cut down to 12.
10 of them were accepted.
This became known as the Bill of Rights.
As they dealt with the rights for people not to be prosecuted for writing newspaper articles.
Or freedom of speech, I think.
Yeah.
That's Amendment 1, isn't it?
Yes.
The rights for states to have their own militia,
so if the British come along again, they could fight back.
The right to bear arms, to protect yourself.
Yeah, number two.
Also not being forced to house soldiers in your own house.
That's the Third Amendment.
Yes, exactly.
Is it?
Yeah, no, no, it is.
Generally what this was was a list of things that the British had done that really annoyed everyone.
Nice.
And they drew up a list of things that said, don't worry guys, we're not going to do this.
That is essentially the Bill of Rights.
It is quite annoying when we even now have to put up soldiers in our houses.
Yeah.
I had three SAS soldiers last week. It's quite frustrating. It is. It to put up soldiers in our houses. Yeah. I had three SAS soldiers last week.
It's quite frustrating.
It is.
It is.
You're trying to shower.
Yeah.
They just commando into the room.
Yeah.
But they cook up a very fine hot pot.
They do.
They do.
So it's all in the roundabouts.
So due to these amendments, the final two states finally ratify.
And the United States are truly finally united. For a time.
Washington then went on tour.
Packed up all his stuff, put on his touring t-shirt.
Going to travel up north to the northern states.
He was a southerner himself.
Let's go and make sure the northern states are alright.
He soon came to hate the crowds, and would attempt to sneak into town unnoticed.
Very rarely succeeding this.
Why is that bright neon T-shirt?
It didn't help.
Washington on tour.
It didn't help.
Yeah.
Well, occasionally when he, like, snuck into a village or a town
using a different road,
someone would just spot him,
and the entire welcome committee would just up sticks and move to him.
Oh, and you would, though, wouldn't you?
Yeah, exactly.
I'm pretty sure he has to.
It's George Washington.
You've got to welcome him. He, you would know, wouldn't you? Yeah, exactly. I'm pretty sure he has to. It's George Washington. You've got to welcome him.
He's our president.
Yeah.
Washington hates this, though.
Really gets fed up with it.
But there's not much he can do.
The only thing he does seem to enjoy on the tour
was the ladies.
Wait.
Martha doesn't come on tour.
He starts at this point to estimate how many ladies there were at each and every dinner party hosted in his honour.
A couple of quotes from his diary here.
Upward of 100 ladies, many of them very handsome.
Another one, 75 well-dressed and handsome ladies, among whom were a greater portion with black hair than you find in the southern states.
Purby President. He's that Purby President, isn't he? Yes. whom were a greater portion with black hair than you find in the southern states. Pervy president.
He's that pervy president, isn't he?
Yes.
Although, it should be said, despite how easily he possibly could have used his position of
power to abuse that position, there is no evidence that he does.
That's good.
But he did like to estimate how many ladies were in the room.
Restrained frustration, it feels like. Yes.
It says something about the state of the country
at this point. The presidential convoy
quite often had to ask for directions.
Nice. And the locals often
would just send them the wrong way just because
it, let's face it, is funny.
Or maybe they
wanted him to go and visit their own village.
But yeah, they quite often ended up going the wrong way.
Nice.
Yeah, back down that way way down that road down there they head down that direction they're like two weeks later back in the way really annoyed we ended up in canada where
eventually he returns to new york and the job of building a country continues
lighthouses are starting to be built, postal services starting, custom houses, etc, etc. Everything needs to be done. Now all of
this is part of Alexander Hamilton's vision. He wanted to build up an industrious nation that used
banks, debts and taxes to stimulate growth. In essence, he wanted to follow a British model of
commerce. Now as you can imagine this has its
opposition especially with secretary of state jefferson who saw the future of the country with
strong small state governments running an agricultural economy which was then then you
reliant on on weather and seasons unfortunately well there is. So you've got small farms, small government against big
government banks. Those are the two opposing views at the moment. I wonder which one wins.
We will see. Hamilton's plan was for the national government to take on state debts,
pulling them together and therefore making investors tied to the federal government,
strengthening it. So all the money goes to the government. Yeah. Well, the debts with the government. Yeah, yeah. But it means that people
are now invested in the government doing well. Ah, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yes. Yes. That's clever.
Jefferson hates this idea. He wants a weaker government. He wants the states to remain
stronger. Washington attempts to stay neutral, but really he backs Hamilton. In the end, Jefferson
and Hamilton sat down and compromised once more. Jefferson would agree to back Hamilton's financial plans
if Hamilton agreed that the new capital for the country would be built in Virginia. Hamilton,
probably attempting to hide his smirk at this point, agrees. He didn't care where the capital
was as long as the bank stayed in New York. Pop the capital wherever you want.
Jefferson came out of the meeting feeling smug,
but eventually would grumble that this was the biggest political mistake he ever made.
Still, the new federal city was going to be built along the Potomac River.
The president would get to choose where.
That's what the decision was.
Washington pulls out a map.
Ooh, this area looks nice.
What area is this?
This is the area just north of Mount Vernon, sir.
That's where you're pointing to.
Oh, yeah, that's it.
That's the one.
Maybe we could build the capital there.
It's a great place.
Yeah.
So this new federal city would be right next to Washington's lands, which would skyrocket in value.
So there's that.
Yeah.
It was agreed that for the next ten years, the president would stay in Philadelphia and then move to the new city.
That sounds odd, doesn't it? Next ten years.
I guess the post of president. But had the four-year thing come in yet?
The four-year per term had, but you could have as many terms as you wanted.
Ah, okay.
Yeah.
So, out of New York and move to Philadelphia.
That's now the plan.
However, once Washington moved, there was an uncomfortable, unforeseen problem.
Philadelphia was in Pennsylvania.
And as we have seen, Pennsylvania was winner of the most
kindest colony award. Yes. Yes. And was continuing this good record as a state because anti-slavery
laws had been introduced. Ooh. Yes. There was a law in effect that stated if any slave was resident
in Pennsylvania for more than six months, they would be free. Interesting. So if the president brought
his slaves over, he'd have to keep a rotation going. And that's exactly what he does. Yes,
Washington was forced to send his slaves back to Mount Vernon twice a year. Now he made it look
like he was doing this for the slaves. It's a favour to you. Go back and visit your family.
This was actually so he wouldn't have to give up his slaves.
It's also around this time that slavery hits the political headlines
because Britain passes its first anti-slavery law.
There's a huge swelling of anti-slavery feeling in the country.
But Washington, fearing economic issues, possibly even civil war,
decides to kick this hot potato down the road.
Mixing my metaphors.
Someone else
in the future deal with it. Yeah.
It's fine. Part of the Constitution stated
this is yet another one of the great
compromises, that the slave trade
would be protected for 20 years.
So no one was allowed to talk about this
until 1808. Washington
maintains, no, we must stick
with the Constitution. We cannot discuss this. Interesting. You can, we must stick with the Constitution.
We cannot discuss this.
Interesting.
I mean, you can see the political bind he's in.
Oh, yeah, yeah. It's in the Constitution.
You can't go tearing that up straight away.
The sovereign states would have a thing or two to say about that.
That's their economy.
Equally, however,
it's not great, is it?
It is not.
Still, life in Philadelphia was much better than in New York.
It was seen as just generally a better place to be.
But this did not stop the political wrangling
as Hamilton proposed a national bank
in the style of the Bank of England.
Ooh.
Yeah.
Again, Jefferson argued against it.
Again, Washington sided with Hamilton.
The South was starting to grumble.
Washington keeps siding with this Northerner.
So Washington decides
to tour the South this time. Again,
he seemed to hate the entire journey
apart from noting
down the number of ladies he saw.
This tour took its toll
on Washington, and the abscess
in his leg returned.
When he got back, he spent another month
bedridden.
So while Washington is in bed,
Hamilton and Jefferson continue to argue,
this time over foreign affairs.
The French Revolution had begun.
Jefferson and his faction were very happy about this. They saw this as a sequel to their own revolution.
However, Hamilton and his supporters,
the Federalists, were a little bit more reserved.
Things seemed to be getting a little bit out of hand over there.
Shall we just take a step back here, shall we?
We don't need to get too involved.
I guess so, because even if you don't really have a monarchy,
they're not rebelling against monarchy, they're rebelling against power.
Well, very, very simple.
Yeah, and this is the trouble with the French Revolution.
It began with a rebellion against the monarchy
and then it turned into a rebellion against
rebellion and then it turned into a rebellion
against that rebellion and oh,
it just turned into a bloodbath.
Big snowball-y bloodbath.
The French Revolution was not like the
American Revolution. No.
Now before long, the
two factions in the government could be summed up by the
Jeffersonian Francophiles and the Hamiltonian Anglophiles. However, that's a bit of a mouthful,
so people started saying Federalists and Republicans. Washington despaired as these
factions grew. As I said, he fully believed that political parties were anti-democratic.
People should have freedom to believe in what they
wanted individually, not follow
parties. Yes, but if you follow a party
that's democratic, right?
You're following ideology. But I guess
though, when you follow a party, they're never going to agree 100%
with what you believe. Yeah. It's always a best
fit, isn't it? So I get the point
but it's good to have a group
to get behind.
Let's not forget there were no parties in Roman
times. No. And everyone was
obsessed with the Romans. Yeah but I
guess there were parties, they just weren't formalised.
Yeah exactly, there were gangs.
And these are just factions at the moment,
they're not formal parties. But they're factions
that are becoming more and more acrimonious
towards each other. It's because of this
split that Washington, getting to the end of his first term, decides to step down.
Or at least he thinks about it.
Because he is very quickly persuaded, mainly by Hamilton, that you can't step down now.
There's no one else.
There's no one else.
Government's not strong enough.
Now, Washington, to begin with, didn't even want to do a full term.
He was planning to do a couple of years and then pass it on.
But he slowly and grudgingly comes to realise that there's no one else who can steer this ship.
So, he'll do it. He'll stay on for another term.
But that's it, right?
No more.
Six terms later.
However, this does lead to the Republicans starting to mutter and grumble
and printing rumours about Washington being a Federalist
and wanting to make himself king.
They are obsessed with this by this point.
Washington was fed up with his Secretary of State by this point
and bluntly told him,
I do not believe that there are ten men in the United States
whose opinions are worth attention
who entertain such a thought.
Nice.
This does not stop the rumours, though.
No.
No.
By this point, Madison and Jefferson,
both of them working for Washington,
are secretly publishing articles against him in the newspaper.
Oh, dear.
Yeah.
Despite this, Washington was elected again unanimously.
But from now on, he had to face a continual hostile press
originating from the Republican side,
most of them writing under Roman pseudonyms.
Jeffy Adams.
Yes.
Meanwhile, things in France were getting bad, shall we say.
Obviously, there's no time to go into details of the French Revolution,
but the section known as the Reign of Terror was about to start.
The king was beheaded, and France had declared war on Britain,
and everyone was dying horribly.
Horribly, horribly, yeah.
In a very quick and efficient way though well sort of
i mean this was also around the time people were being tied up and thrown into lakes in big groups
because that was the quickest way to kill people it wasn't good you sort of yeah you sort of don't
think about well i i never really thought about the french Revolution and how bad it really was. Oh, it was awful.
You get snippets, but you don't really appreciate it.
Yeah.
Now, the Republicans were very pro-French Revolution,
but it was getting harder and harder to justify that
as more and more brutal stories came out of France.
Now, a lot of the stories were denounced as being fake,
as propaganda by the British.
But slowly but surely, people were starting to realise
things aren't good in France.
No.
No.
We should probably cancel our holiday.
Yes, definitely.
Don't fancy that weekend in Paris anymore.
Now, if you remember, France had only asked for one thing,
for their help in the American Revolution.
Oh, yeah.
All you have to do is come and help us
the next time we're at war with the British. Ah. Jefferson obviously wanted to help, as did many people. The French came over and it's
not just helped us. If it wasn't for the French, we wouldn't have won the War of Independence,
and everyone was very aware of that fact. Obviously, we need to go and help them out.
Hamilton argued, our deal was with the French king.
Ooh.
The French king's dead. Do we
really need to honour this?
Well, good. Washington,
despite seeing how tacky this
argument is,
did agree that the US
could simply not afford to get involved.
They're just not powerful enough at this time
to help out.
Yeah, let's execute the better half of Ada here
and, you know, not do anything.
Yeah, they declared neutrality.
Fair enough.
Yeah.
The Republicans grumbled.
It was at this point citizen Jeunet arrived.
Where is he from?
Or Gennet, depending on how you pronounce his name.
He was an envoy from France
who wasted no time trying to get the US to side with the French.
Not happy simply trying political discussion to do this,
he also attempted to do things such as recruit people
to start uprisings in Canada and Florida.
Ooh.
Yeah.
He soon became a celebrity and was firing people up.
Riots began in all of the major cities.
He was a whirlwind of destruction.
Washington, understandably, was worried. The French Revolution was increasingly looking more like a bloodbath. And here was this crazy Frenchman trying to stir things up in his
fragile new country. I reckon he was a mime. Why? I don't know. I've got this image of white makeup.
Are you just going stereotypical frenchman oh yes
baguette under the arm yeah miming the tyranny of monarchy yes using his baguette yes right okay
but ironically he was actually doing something else yeah everyone read it in that way
so he fired it up with no intention of doing that. Oh, I'm sure that happened. Yeah. Well, fortunately for
Washington, there was soon a letter from France asking for Genet to be returned to be put on trial
for crimes against the people. I declare asylum. Is exactly what he did. Yes. Yeah. The revolution
in France had got to the stage where it was eating itself and no one was safe. Yeah.
So, Genet asks for asylum.
Washington grits his teeth and says, yes, you can stay here, but seriously, stop firing
up the population.
We've just about got things sorted over here.
At least give us some sort of big copper statue in the future.
Yes, give us something.
Genet kind of takes that on board, but Washington can't help but notice there are one or two more Republican societies
springing up at this point.
A few more articles in the newspaper than before
that were anti-Federalist.
And weirdly in French.
Yeah, which is a big clue.
So things continue to be tense.
You really get the sense here
that a second revolution was about to happen in America.
People were not happy.
But then one thing happened which calmed everyone down right away.
Yellow fever.
Yeah, that does calm you down.
Well, in a sense.
Yeah.
Everyone suddenly got very, very ill.
Philadelphia was evacuated.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, the government went down to a skeleton staff.
Everything just stopped working for a while.
Eventually, after several months, the city managed to return to normal.
But by this point, Jefferson had had enough of Washington always siding with Hamilton, and he quit.
Washington insisted that he sided with Jefferson and the Republicans as often as
Hamilton and the Federalists, but the Republicans simply did not believe him. You haven't sided
with us on anything. You constantly, Hamilton has been employee of the month 13 times in the last
year. How is this even possible with Washington? And Washington just goes, yeah, but the other day you asked,
do I prefer red or blue?
I said blue.
And that's what you said, Jefferson.
So, you know, I do go with you sometimes.
Washington couldn't dwell on Jefferson leaving too much
because there were other worries.
Hamilton's whole economic plan revolved around taxing people to fund the government.
As we've seen, people didn't like to be taxed in the Americas.
No.
No.
Why should I? What have you done for me?
There was one particular thing that was being taxed that they really, really, really got annoyed by.
Tobacco.
Farming.
Land.
Whiskey.
No.
Yes.
Not the golden liquor. The fire of life god's tears yes whiskey was being taxed no
i know i mean that's that's inhumane well protests had turned into full-blown armed insurrection
good about six to seven thousand men all of them with hip flasks.
Slightly wobbly with those guns.
Yeah.
But would make no difference to the accuracy.
No, not that bad.
Washington, with dismay, realised
that the federal troops that he had,
which were not many,
were not large enough to put this down,
so he was forced to call upon the militia
from several states,
something he really, really found annoying.
Still, he obtains about 13,000 men.
Donning a freshly made uniform,
he then became the only sitting US president in history
to lead troops into battle.
I say into battle, no battle actually took place.
Having nearly double the numbers against them,
and all of them feeling a bit worse for wear, perhaps,
the rebels realised that they were willing to pay a bit extra on their whisky.
I've got a bitch of a hangover.
The rebellion was put down without a fight.
However, it was not long before the next crisis.
A copy of a treaty with the British arrived on his desk.
Now, Washington had previously sent John Jay
to go and hammer out some
problems they were having with the former
mother country. Namely, the
fact the British kept doing
things like stopping American ships,
telling the sailors that they were actually
British and forcing them to serve in the
Royal Navy. Ooh, press ganging.
Yeah.
Not on, really.
No. No. Especially back then. You, really. No. No.
Especially back then.
You, are you British?
No.
Can you prove it?
No.
Do you speak English?
We've still all got the same accents.
Yeah, so.
What's the name of the king?
George III?
You're clearly British.
Yeah, so people were being press ganged.
Apparently people were trying to tattoo themselves with American things
to prove they were American. But what was American
back then? I don't know. Whiskey.
George Washington's face, like, on their chest.
Nice. Life size.
Love it. Yeah.
That was popular back then.
So understandably, this was annoying
the Americans slightly. Yeah. So John Jay was meant to be going and sorting stuff like that then. So understandably, this was annoying the Americans slightly.
Yeah.
So John Jay was meant to be going and sorting stuff like that out.
Unfortunately, this treaty that came back didn't solve that.
In fact, it also gave Britain huge benefits in trade.
Not great.
They'd be first to trade with and have certain trade rights over other countries.
Yeah, it really, really didn't look good.
It looked almost like they were going back to the colonial days.
Oh, dear.
Yeah.
However, Washington also realised that the British said they would withdraw from the Great Lake area.
The US could trade with the British West Indies, so that opens up that trade.
And, oh, this one was important.
We won't go to war.
That's nice.
Because Washington realised that there is no way France can help out at the moment.
No.
And Britain realised that as well.
Your Frenchie pals are not helping you out this time.
No.
Yeah.
Ooh, that's devious, isn't it?
But at the same time, brilliant. So Washington, in Ooh, that's devious, isn't it? Yeah.
But at the same time, brilliant.
So Washington, in a bit of a bind here, he realises that the Republicans are going to despise this.
Yeah.
But there's not much he can do.
No.
And there are actually some benefits in the treaty.
Yes.
But it's not good.
It's limiting export, but at the same time
you do have a consistent place to sell
yeah and that's good
pros and cons
more cons than pros
but there were some pros
so he asked Hamilton
who had also recently retired by this point
he's on his second lot of secretaries
who just simply weren't as good
so I've not mentioned them
Washington himself clearly thinks so
because it's Hamilton he turns to at this point
and he asks Hamilton
what do you think about this treaty
here's a copy of the treaty
Hamilton in typical style of Hamilton
replied with 57 pages
of reasons why to accept the treaty
nice
we are definitely doing an episode on Hamilton.
He's an Anglophile, isn't he, really?
So Washington's definitely thinking, I'm going to have to do this.
As long as I can keep it from the public,
as long as it doesn't get leaked until we vote on it,
it should be fine.
Is this the first time now it's actually been leaked on this podcast?
No.
Are we telling America the first time? I wish this was leaked on this podcast no are we telling america the first time
i wish this was an exclusive but no because it wasn't long afterwards that a republican paper
got a copy of the treaty and published many details there was public outrage here was the
government siding once again with the british the French. They're good friends, the French, who helped them win independence.
Oh, yeah.
Jay was openly called a traitor in many areas of the country.
Washington also receives countless letters.
A lot he refused to even reply to because, and I quote,
they were too rude to merit one.
That's not even possible to do to your own mother.
Things like that.
Yeah.
It is testament to Washington's popularity and influence
that he was able to weather this storm
and get the treaty passed only just.
It scraped through.
But his reputation was damaged once more
and the Republicans held a caucus.
The first official meeting.
This is really the point where
they go from a faction to a natural party. Washington was fed up by this point. He stated,
and I quote, he had been vilified in indecent terms that could scarcely be applied to the
Emperor Nero. He felt hard done by. Yeah. Understandably. Yeah. Quite possibly. Republicans start refusing to toast to their president.
Oh.
So around this time, he decided, you know what?
I'm going to retire.
He didn't need to, because there was nothing in the Constitution stating how many terms a president could hold.
So he could have stayed on.
Many people wanted him to stay on.
But his stepping down at this point sets the precedent that would last until World War II.
Presidents would only serve two terms at most.
He then wrote a farewell speech
that was very long and full of bitterness.
And another thing.
Hamilton took
one look at it and immediately rewrote
it.
Washington after admitted that it
was, and I quote, more dignified
on the whole and with less egotism.
Now Washington himself realised, yeah,
maybe I went a bit far on that one.
You didn't even know what you had.
So just like his stepping down
at the end of the war, his stepping
down from being president sent
shockwaves throughout the world.
George III stated
at this point that this proved that Washington was the greatest character
of the age.
George III grew to respect George Washington quite a bit after the war.
Can't help but feel that the feeling was not mutual.
One newspaper wrote,
If ever a nation had suffered from the improper influence of a single man, the American nation
has suffered from the influence of George Washington.
Oh, man. Yeah.
However, this was definitely the minority.
A majority of people
celebrated, especially
celebrating a peaceful transfer of power
that took place. The election
was held and the Federalist
Vice President, John Adams,
beat Jefferson to become the
second president.
Washington then returned home at last to Mount Vernon,
passing the future White House as he went back home.
Oh, was it being built?
Oh yeah, throughout all of this, Washington DC, not known as that at that time,
the Federalist City was being built throughout these eight years of him being president.
They were hurriedly laying down plans for it.
Nice.
It's fascinating how quickly they decided, right, we're building a capital.
Nice.
It's going to be here.
And in the middle of no state, in the middle of, was it Maryland?
Well, it's in Virginia and Maryland on the border.
It's on the border, yeah.
Yeah.
It's kind of stateless.
Yes, exactly.
It was decided it wouldn't be an estate.
So, yeah, he passes the White House with the scaffolding on it
as he goes back home.
Nice.
Yes.
And finally he arrives home
and he retires.
Not for long though.
A couple of years later
he goes out riding in cold weather,
hail and snow.
He got home and did not change.
He sat down and he had some food.
He went to bed.
He's in the same clothes.
Yes.
Not changing.
The next day he awoke struggling to breathe. He's in the same clothes. Yes. Not changing.
The next day he awoke struggling to breathe.
The doctors were summoned.
It did not matter how much blood they let.
George was deteriorating.
We're letting more blood, but he keeps just deteriorating every minute.
Every pint we relieve of him, he gets worse.
I don't understand.
George Washington died in December 1799.
Aged 67. His last words
were, tis well
to his wife Martha.
There you go. That's George Washington.
Oh, he's dead. Yeah, he is.
That's going to happen a lot.
Not to George
Washington. Poor guy.
So what do you think?
It was interesting Let's judge him for the first time
Statement shit
Okay so in this round we are judging on
What did he do for the country
Or his party
Or the people he was trying to help
And I think in many ways
This is just simply outstanding
Yeah he does as much as he can
Of what's best for the country.
Even when he knows things aren't great,
it's like, well, it's in our best interest to sort of do that.
Let's face it, he restored American credit.
He assumed the state debts.
He created a national bank.
He created a mint.
He created a Coast Guard, a custom service, a tax system.
Coast Guard?
Oh, yeah, the Coast Guard was created by him.
You mean he created the first ever Baywatch? Yeah, yeah him who i mean the shorts weren't red they were blue and
buff but they were still the same dimensions oh yeah shocking yeah it was controversial it's like
why are you running really really slowly yeah it was It was only once California became a state did the red shots come out.
Ah, that makes sense.
Yeah.
So, yeah, he did that and many, many other things as well.
He managed to maintain peace with France and Britain.
In very trying times, yeah.
Yeah.
It would be very easy not to.
You've got a very annoyed Britain who are smarting from losing the war.
And you've got a France in complete turmoil.
Yeah, yeah.
Both countries are hugely more powerful than you.
And you need to try and maintain this middle ground and not annoy either of them too much.
Far, far harder than it initially sounds.
So he managed to do all that.
But possibly more importantly than all of that, he managed to implement the constitution.
Yeah.
And created countless precedents for others to follow.
Yes. That's why they named the title after him as well, Precedent.
Yes, that's where that word came from.
He retired twice.
The US so easily could have been a dictatorship or a monarchy at this point, but he didn't do it, and he could have done.
Oh, easily.
If he really wanted to just take over the country, he probably could have done.
He sort of did, but in an agreeable way.
Yeah, exactly.
And that stepping down from power, that peaceful transfer of power to John Adams, that giving
up the army when he didn't need to, is huge.
Yeah.
So there's all that bad, and there's the obvious two problems, which is just going to keep
coming up for quite some time.
The first one, he didn't
really do anything to ease tensions
between the US and the Native Americans.
One historian summed it up
as a well-meaning failure
on his part. Fighting continued
throughout his presidency, and little
was done to aid relations
from the federal government.
Santa's quite busy though
with lots of other things.
You deal with that, I've got... I'm trying to just sort...
Yeah, you can understand that maybe this wasn't
the highest thing on his agenda.
That's just a minutiae at the side, I'm not really...
But equally, these are problems in his country
that really need to be sorted out.
Yeah, of course.
So maybe we can cut him a bit of slack on that.
However, the next one is a bit trickier.
If ever there was a time to deal with the obvious problem of slavery in this country,
and it was obvious to everyone at the time,
the majority of people thought that slavery was awful,
but you had a powerful minority who wanted to keep it.
Because it made them money.
Yeah, and that was a problem.
It's going to have to be dealt with at some point.
Dealing with it at the start would have made a lot of sense.
But he signed a thing saying no.
Well, I understand the political bind he's in, exactly.
It was that compromise, let's not talk about it.
But, quite frankly, kicking the can down the road for future generations is irresponsible.
Not really, because if he'd tackled it, they would have said, well, you're not following the Constitution.
Everything's in value.
Oh, no, no.
I'm saying tackle it even before that, whilst the Constitution was being written.
Right.
Is that his fault on his own?
How much could he have done?
Because he stayed pretty neutral in everything,
as I think he rightly should have done.
Well, yeah, his neutrality as a president
gives him a huge amount of score.
I'm not saying all presidents should be neutral on all things,
but the first president, it was the perfect way to do things.
It was a very tricky political situation,
but just because it's tricky
doesn't mean it shouldn't have been done.
So I think I'm going to have to knock
something off.
But I'm not going to knock a huge amount off
just because everything he did do
was just very, very good.
I agree. But I can't give him a full
ten because it wasn't perfect.
No, of course not.
I'm going to give him an eight. I think that's a
fair score.
I'm actually more impressed. I was going to go for nine. I was going to give him an eight. I think that's a fair score. Nate, I'm actually more impressed.
I was going to go for nine.
I was going to knock him a point off for not managing to deal with the slavery problem at the start.
But, I mean, it was such a hard political situation.
He was trapped in a bind.
He was trapped in a bind.
You're going to stick with your eight?
Yes.
I'm going to go for nine.
That is a 17 for statesmanship.
Damn good score. Very good score. That is a 17 for statesmanship. Damn good score.
Very good score.
That is very high.
Okay, next round.
Disgraceful.
Okay, this round we look at things that are scandalous.
Things that are just a bit disgraceful to the name of being president.
His leery eye for the women.
Well, exactly.
In this round we will award points out of 10 each,
but it will appear as a minus number, knocking their score down.
Like it.
Yeah.
So the more points they get, the more points we knock off.
Yeah, which we don't do for the Romans,
but for the Romans, that's like ancient history,
and it's just a bit of fun.
But it just feels wrong awarding points for some terrible things that some people did.
That's true, yeah.
So we're going to go for minus numbers in this one.
So, disgrace gate for George Washington, very, very little.
He was straight-laced.
He was very proper.
He was a proper gentleman.
Yeah.
Saying that, though, we do have two things.
One small thing and one large thing.
The small one.
He was a bit pervy on his road trips.
But like I say, there's no record
of him using his fame and power to
actually act upon this, so
perhaps not really worthy of a point.
Pervy gentleman. Yeah.
He appreciated the ladies.
Very quietly and just
very intense staring.
Yeah, like counting them is a bit weird.
Yeah. 30% have dark hair.
60% have blonde hair. 60% have blonde hair.
10% have red hair.
Red hairs are down from last week.
Parby really hopes he was like that.
Oh yeah.
Gets a spreadsheet and everything.
Yeah, so I mean there is that.
Okay, so that's the small one.
Large one.
His personal attitude towards his slaves was, to put it bluntly, not good.
It's the whole thing of, you know, it's all well and good saying what you believe,
but it's how you act that really, truly shows what you actually believe.
Yeah, and this is how he acted.
His diary is littered with him getting frustrated at slaves
for not working hard enough despite all he's provided for them.
Oh.
Yeah, it's a constant bugbear of his
that these slaves don't appreciate him enough.
Oh, they're massive, no wonder.
He expected an 87-year-old slave to still work
and was frustrated when he was slowing down.
He once approached a slave with a broken arm
and showed him how he could still work
by picking up a rake with one hand and using it.
You get the feel, right?
He wasn't doing it to be an arse. He was just trying to be helpful, but not really understanding that he's not being
helpful. Yeah, he genuinely saw it as if he was doing these slaves a favour by not being a horrible
slave owner, and he couldn't understand why he wasn't appreciated, and why the slaves didn't
work really hard for him because he
was such a good guy that's the feeling i get from him that he just could not quite see that these
people wanted to be free because of course they wanted to be free something to do with whether he
was a terrible slave owner or a relatively good slave owner people want freedom and george
washington could not see that. And because of that,
the way he acted towards people was at times not great. No, it doesn't matter how nice the prison
is. A prison's a prison. Yeah, there was one young slave, young female slave near the end of his
presidency who ran away and he moved heaven and earth and actually broke some laws to try and get her back.
Yeah, he would chase down people relentlessly.
Despite his promise never to buy another slave after the war,
because he didn't like slavery,
he actually purchased a cook as late as 1797
in his last year of being a president.
So he just broke that one.
He speaks about emancipation a lot, but he did nothing in his life to of being a president. So he just broke that one. He speaks about emancipation a lot,
but he did nothing in his life to support the idea.
No, he didn't believe in it, did he?
He felt like he was saying it...
No, I don't get that impression of him,
because he felt like he thought it was the right thing to say
to keep people on side,
but none of his actions proved that.
There is one action that proves it, though.
He was nice.
No, because I said he did nothing in his life to support the idea.
The one thing he did do
is in his will, he freed
his slaves. Oh.
He doesn't need them anymore. If anything, that's selfish.
Well, he said
they would be free once Martha had died.
Martha, understandably,
found herself in a
house surrounded by slaves
waiting for her to die so they could be
free and just went, actually no, you can be
free now.
So it's for her sake.
Yeah.
So he does actually free
a lot of slaves. Now he didn't outright
own all his slaves
through various different legal reasons
so he didn't free everyone but
that he did free his slaves so eventually all that talk about emancipation actually he did do it in
the end but he waited till it wouldn't impact on him to do it that's my problem yeah what i'm
tempted to give him points in disgrace gate for is his attitude towards the individual slaves. Yeah. It's just
he just wasn't particularly
nice to them and he thought he
was and that's the thing. That's the thing, it's like
ignorance rather than rather cruelty, it's just
stupidity almost.
But yeah, ignorance rather. Yeah.
But it is only the one thing
an otherwise
impeccable record and we're
going to have some in the future
that have many, many, many things.
So I don't think we can go too high.
No.
I'm thinking maybe about three-ish.
I was thinking three.
Yeah.
I was thinking three.
That's three apiece,
so that is a score of six for Disgrace Gate.
Whatever score he gets, we're taking off minus six.
Yes, that'll be a minus six in the end.
Right, next round.
Silver Scream. I had a thought about this when i went to the loo before we recorded this scene this section of the podcast his life possibly an overshare for the listener but carry on i i feel that his life
would make a great hbo or netflix series four series the first series his early life growing up yeah second
series the war third series the build of the constitution four series presidency and retirement
a bit like the tudors with henry the eighth like it would break up so because i think for one film
there's too much going on oh for a film well yeah do need to. Just like Washington, we need to lay down some precedents right here.
It's a silver screen round
any form of dramatisation of his life
that we are rewarding.
So we haven't even made it clear
what this round is for our listeners.
Well, let's say that before then go in.
You just change what I've said.
Just put the order of it backwards.
Oh, we could just say it now.
Save me some editing time.
Oh, go on then.
Yeah.
So this round is
how well would their life
fit into a film? So what
you're asking is are we allowed to
put it as a series? Yeah, I think
so. Yeah, so it's, well
let's face it, series
are better than films nowadays, aren't
they? At least good ones are. You can develop
a character war and have a bit of a character arc.
Yeah, so it's a
film or a series. How well would it
work? Even as a play, why not?
Yeah, a mime.
A folk song. A riddle.
A limerick.
You're thinking of a limerick now.
Yes, I am. Well, okay, let's
look. First of all,
character arc. That is an
impressive character arc from George Washington.
Oh, it is. Yeah, the character development
in this is astonishing.
He comes across like
Hugh Laurie in Blackadder
at the start. Yes!
He really does. Yeah. And by
the end, you get the feeling this is a man
with gravitas. He turns into
Vimes at the end from the Terry Pratchett
series. Yeah, yeah.
He's someone you don't mess with
who will get the job done and everyone respects.
Yeah.
The fact he's a buffoon in the beginning
to the point where not even president
if you tap him on the shoulder as a joke.
He will wilt you.
Yes.
He'll wilt you like lettuce.
Yes.
Yeah, I mean, that is just hugely impressive.
And let's not forget some of the amazing set pieces we could have in this film slash series.
We've got all the skirmishes and the Wild West adventures at the start.
Yeah, yeah.
His guide turned around and shot him point blank, but he survived.
He almost drowned in a freezing river.
All of that stuff.
Then you've got full-blown battles where he was shot off his horse and his uniform had holes in.
He was being dragged along
in a wagon, feeling ill.
Oh, his brother died in a dramatic scene.
You've got a Barbados bit there that you could have.
Yeah, all that happened.
Just the setting alone. And then you've got the full-blown
war. You can have
all of that, all the battles. Action sequence.
Action sequence after action sequence
and then lots of really quiet running away sequences.
Very much like The Revenant,
just like lots of heavy breathing,
running through a foresty thing.
I think Band of Brothers for the Revolutionary War.
Yeah.
Yeah, lots of Bastogne-type episodes.
Oh, yes.
So that would, oh, Abbey Valley Forge.
Yeah.
Yeah, so that would be amazing.
And then you go into all the political intrigue,
when he becomes president,
fighting with Hamilton and Jefferson.
And then right at the end,
where the Jade Treaty is published in the paper,
you can have a spinning paper that zooms towards the camera.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, you've got that.
It's all good stuff, isn't it?
It really is.
I am mightily impressed.
I would happily watch a series on
Washington. I'd watch, yeah.
I didn't always like Washington as a
person when researching him. That makes
most interesting character. Got to love the flaws.
He grew on me, but at no
point was he not interesting.
He was fascinating. Yes.
He is not a brilliant general.
He's not the best politician in
history. Nope. But the fact that he's not almost makes him more interesting.
He's just like a real person.
Yeah.
Who tried his best and then stepped down.
Because he hated being a celebrity.
Yeah.
So I just don't see how you can get much better than this.
No.
I'm going to go for the full ten.
Are you?
Yeah.
I'm going to go for the nine. Ooh Are you? Yeah. I'm going to go for the nine.
Ooh, just in case.
Just in case, yes.
Just in case
someone else goes
to the moon or something.
I think so, yes.
You never know
what Trump does.
That's a mighty
impressive 19.
19 for silver screen.
Okay.
Turn the silver screen.
Okay, in this round
we judge their
official portrait.
We're not allowed
to just use any image.
It has to be
the official portrait. Nice. not allowed to just use any image. It has to be the official portrait.
Nice.
That is done.
Now, this portrait was painted in 1797.
Oh, he's alive.
At the end of his presidency by a man named Gilbert Stewart.
Washington's 64 years old in this painting.
It's a painting of him rejecting his third term.
You'll be pleased to know he is wearing his black velvet suit.
Nice!
Yes.
Now, this is a copy of the original.
The original was a gift to the British Prime Minister, interestingly.
You can tell all of the copies have deliberate spanning errors
on the spines of the books.
Really?
Yeah, so you can tell which one was the original.
It all says Constitution of the United States in the copies
instead of United States. Yeah. Oh, wow. Gilbert Stewart called the copies instead of the United States.
Yeah.
Oh, wow.
Gilbert Stewart called the copies he produced his $100 bills because he'd create copies so frequently for people and charge $100 for each one.
Nice.
Yeah.
So here we go.
Are you ready to judge?
I'm ready to judge.
There he is.
Very familiar painting, isn't it?
Yeah.
That's very familiar.
It's very typical sort of Georgian style.
Yeah.
You've got the open curtain in the background looking out to the land that he
owns. Yeah. Or his country.
Very political. You've got
quite a bit of Roman imagery in there.
Yeah, you've got the columns in the background.
Yeah, you've got columns in the background.
You've got the faces as the
table legs, so the bundles of
sticks that the guards of
the consuls would hold.
They're the table legs on that table.
You've got the constitution
underneath the table there.
Lots of writing equipment
on his table. And George himself
is holding a ceremonial sword, but it's
downward, because he's not a violent man.
But, I mean,
to me, that strikes like a political
painting. Oh yes, definitely.
It's less military and more political, which is
which says something about it. And
yeah, it's like the defence posture
with the sword. I'll defend my
country. This is my country behind
me. Yeah. His arm is outstretched
as if to say, I don't need another
third term. Or, pass me another
chip. Yeah, it could be. Or
look at this donkey. Yeah. Yeah. It's off
offside. Yeah, yeah. You can't see the donkey. It could be anything. He's gesturing. Yeah. Yeah,
it's very good. His face, clenched, bulging mouth. Yeah, very round cheeks. Because at this point,
he only had one tooth at that point. Oh, did he? It might even, actually, the last one probably
came out by that point. Yeah, I think when he started as president, he only had one tooth at that point. Actually, the last one probably came out by that point. Yeah, when he
started as president, he only had one tooth.
Really? Yes. He suffered with
dental problems his whole life, so his dentures
caused him a huge amount of problems.
They kept springing out.
So whenever he was
officially doing things, he'd quite often keep his
mouth shut, which is perhaps why he was
seen as neutral quite a lot.
He wasn't neutral to his choice. Yeah, inside his why he was seen as neutral quite a lot it wasn't it was mutual
true choice yeah inside his head he was just going no no no don't do that oh a lady boing
teeth definitely teeth yeah so um yeah that's george um how are we going to do this is it on
him or the entire painting i think it's entire painting. Yeah, so as a painting.
Because it tells a whole political message, doesn't it?
It does, doesn't it?
It's very of the time.
Yeah.
You know, very rich, very lavish.
I think it's trying to show, look how rich we are, look how wealth, look how strong we are.
We are a republic.
Yes.
Look how Roman we are.
Just like the Romans.
Yeah.
We're rich, we're flamboyant.
It's good.
I like the fact he's gesturing.
I like the fact he's looking stern.
Yeah.
I quite like it.
It's quite, quite formal.
Quite nice.
It's not amazing, though.
I'm going to give it...
It's hard to do the first one, isn't it?
I'm going to give it a slightly above average.
I think the painting of him's all right,
and I quite like the backgrounds for a bonus point.
So I'm going to give it a six.
Out of ten.
Yeah.
I will match that, because I agree with that.
So for this one, because we don't want to weight this too highly,
we divide that score by 4,
which gives them a total of 3.00 for Canvas ability.
Bonus!
And now, finally, we've just got a couple of short bonus rounds
just to grab a couple of points at the end.
The first one is Terms Served. If you complete a couple of points at the end. The first one is terms
served. If you complete a term, you get a point. George Washington completed two terms. He gets
two points. Two points. Next one, assassination. If you're assassinated, you get a couple of points.
Attempted assassination, one point. Attempted assassination, one point. No assassination attempts,
no points. No one tried to knock off one point. No assassination attempts, no points.
No one tried to knock off old Georgie.
So no points for him.
It wouldn't have been in their best interest, though, would it?
It wouldn't.
See, the Romans should have learned from that.
Yes, they definitely should.
And then finally, election.
This one's a bit more complicated.
If you had two elections, I average your electoral college score
and then decide if you won by a landslide if you got more than 70% of the electoral college votes.
George Washington gets two because in both his elections he got 100% of the votes.
Nice.
You don't get more landslide even that.
No.
No, so he gets two points for election.
So that gives him a total score of 37.
That's pretty good.
Yeah, the maximum you can score in this is 51.
That's top-notch for everything, yeah.
Yeah, so 37 is a very respectable score.
It's going to be hard to beat.
I think it'll be hard to beat.
Yeah.
And so all that leaves is our final round.
American or American?
Okay, this round, no points.
We just decide, do we like the guy?
Yeah.
Did he impress?
And if he didn't, he's an Americant.
But if he did...
Oh, he's an American.
Oh, yes.
Hardcore style.
Stylia, I believe.
Yeah.
It'd be really embarrassing, though.
What?
If we forgot to record this and then had to meet, like, two days later.
Oh, that would...
To splice into the episode.
That would be really annoying, wouldn't it?
That would be so embarrassing. Good job we've not done later. Oh, that would be... To splice into the episode. That would be really annoying, wouldn't it? That would be so embarrassing.
Good job we've not done that.
No, no.
No.
Go on then, since we have literally just talked about him,
not two days ago,
were you impressed?
I was impressed.
And the good thing about him,
and as a, I was about to say character,
and as a person,
he got more interesting as he went along.
Yeah.
He's very human.
Yeah, I liked that.
He's very flawed at the beginning.
Yeah. Then he changed and developed and. He's very flawed at the beginning. Yeah.
Then he changed and developed and basically became
the first ever US president. I don't
think there's any way he can't be an American.
Yeah, he's got to have it. He definitely
does. Yeah. He
was just the perfect man for the job. He was.
Anyone else would have just
took America, drove
into a brick wall with their
ego. Yes. And Washington brick wall with their ego.
Yes.
And Washington didn't have that ego.
No.
And he knew when to step away.
Yeah.
Which is very important.
Well, he wanted to step away most of the time.
Yeah, that's true.
It was more sense of duty for him, wasn't it?
So, yeah, I completely agree.
Well done, Washington.
You are an American.
Woo!
So, next time we will start John Adams.
I honestly don't know if that's going to be a one or two-parter yet.
I thought it was going to be one, but then I started reading
his biography and I think it might
become a two-parter.
I think that's going to be the precedent now.
It might well be, yes.
So, next time we will be doing John Adams.
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and all that needs to be said then is
boing
goodbye
goodbye Thank you for listening, and all that needs to be said then is... Boing! Goodbye. Goodbye.
Hamilton! I've finally done it! My retirement speech.
Ah, good, good. Let me have a look. Let's see what you've got here on the parchment.
I don't mind if you want to polish a little bit of it,
but I'm quite happy. I think this is a good strong speech. Okay, let me have a little look
through here, and, um,
you say you're happy
with this? Yes, I think it's a very strong
start. I think it's a very
impassioned start, sir.
Dear losers,
you have no idea what you're missing.
I hope you'll sod off and die.
It's... yes.
I was toying with ingrates, but losers, I thought,
would really get that feeling that I've won and they've lost.
It's very modern, I'll give you that.
Oh, no, I can see you've used ingrates down here, though.
Oh, yes, well, it's a good word.
Yes, you've used it four times in one sentence.
I can't help but feel that their ingratitude merits this.
That's true, but I feel like you may lose the audience
when you start the next sentence with,
I hope you all die in your sleep.
It's a bit harsh.
There's parenthesis.
There's a lot of parenthesis.
I didn't say everyone.
No, I'll give you that.
I made it clear I didn't want Martha to die.
Okay.
Um, yes.
Have you considered perhaps a more statesmanship approach?
How do you mean?
More dignified.
Less sweary.
What?
Sorry, I got distracted.
Twelve blondes, four redheads and three brunettes just walked past the window.
Can't you see?
Ladies!
Oh, they've gone.
Pervert.