An Army of Normal Folks - Tiani Shoemaker Clyde: Little Miracles for Single Moms (Pt 1)
Episode Date: August 22, 2023Tiani found herself navigating uncharted territory as a single mother to three children. After struggling for years, she found stability as a real estate agent and felt called to help single mothers l...ike herself, leading her to create Little Miracles. The nonprofit has helped 86 families with home improvements and has inspired an army of over 1,800 volunteers.Support the show: https://www.normalfolks.us/premiumSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Do you call her and just say, hey, listen, you don't know us, but we'd like to have your
house for a day and we're going to send you off.
No, basically.
How do you respond to that?
You know what?
Be like, get away from me.
You know, ironically, as crazy as this first one was and I was like trying to just
trust me, I don't know what. You know, know and I wasn't what did you say to her? I said hey, I know your friend Jen
Davies and I'm trying to do this thing. I'm starting. It's like
Can I stop by and talk to you? It'll make more sense
I'm over and fold some towels. It's kind of weird if you think it really is
Welcome to an army of normal folks. I'm Bill Courtney. I'm a normal guy. I'm a husband,
a father, an entrepreneur, and I've been an inner-city football coach in Memphis.
And the last part unintentionally led to an Oscar for the film about our team is called
Undefeated. Guys, I believe our country's problems will never be solved by a bunch of fancy people
in NYSuits talking big words and nobody understands on CNN and Fox.
But rather, by an army of normal folks us, just you and me deciding, hey, I can help.
That's what Tiani Shoemaker-Claude, the voice we just heard is done.
Tiani is the founder of Little Miracles, which as you might guess,
helps single moms with miracles in their home that are meant to be little, but every single time
they've turned out to be incredibly meaningful to their moms and their kids and to the army of
volunteers that have made their 86 miracles happen. I can't wait for you to hear this story
made their 86 miracles happen. I can't wait for you to hear this story right after these brief messages from our generous sponsors.
Tiani actually played college basketball at BYU and then married the quarterback. Although this beginning may sound a little fairy tell us and it was for a while.
The Mormon couple, with three children divorced, sadly after 10 years.
And suddenly Tiani, a single mom, with a fashion merchandising degree that she wasn't even using,
had to figure out how to make it on her own in Salt Lake City.
You're a single mom.
Single mom.
With a fashion merchandising thing going on in Salt Lake.
Not even a career, yes.
And what do you do to make ends meet?
Seriously, work with odd jobs, whatever jobs, or not odd jobs. You want to make ends meet? Seriously, what are jobs, whatever jobs,
or not our jobs?
You wanna know the truth?
Yeah, I do.
I'm actually gonna proud of this,
but I kept it on the down low.
I delivered the Salt Lake Tribune.
You did what?
I had a college degree.
I could deliver this, somehow I met somebody who,
you delivered papers?
I was like making like 1,500 bucks,
which I thought was a ton of money at the time
just for having a little exercise in the morning. I had this route of apartment so I'd fill my little bag up with paper
I thought it was a great little gig. I didn't need a babysitter. I was up at four in the morning. I got done.
So I show you where the paper boy girl girl for a minute.
So you were the paper boy girl girl for a minute
Um, we had actually when I was married to we'd opened a salon a little like a tanning salon spa
So I ran that a little bit but about the time we got divorced we we sold that and
So did you struggle oh, it's a single mama kids. Oh struggle financially. Yeah, absolutely. I mean
So I got divorced probably like oh four oh five and
I actually found myself
pregnant not married I had two kids already know family in Colorado or in Utah
So we're all mostly in Colorado and yeah my my fashion merchandising degree didn't come to help me at all like I was just trying to fit
What am I gonna try to figure out what my life
was gonna be at that point.
I mean, everything had gone like my script.
I'd be, why you marry the quarter,
like I had thought until that.
Yeah, this is a serious audible.
Yeah.
And now I decided to get my real estate license.
Is this why you're throwing newspapers?
No, we're right about the time I was thinking about it. Yeah, like I can't do this for very're throwing newspapers? No, we're right about it.
I was thinking about it.
Yeah, like I can't do this for very long.
Right, I mean this isn't really paying my bills.
You know, it was a little extra money.
So somewhere there you say, I'm gonna give my real estate.
Yeah, yeah.
The market at that point was doing really well.
So I thought, okay, mom, my friends that we're doing it, we're doing it.
Well, if you were getting a, if this is around 2006 or 2007,
you're getting a real estate license right before the housing crash.
Absolutely. Yep. That's cool. It was very.
How'd that work out? So, you know what? Now looking back, it was great because, you know, when I think about it and I don't know for sure how I got through all of that. Just one day at a time, a little by little by little.
I mean, here I had, I got my license in06, right?
Right enough to see the good stuff,
what it could be and then got on with a builder,
thought life's going great.
And then what?
Yep.
And then found myself in this situation
and just like that, the market turned, everything crashed.
You know, it was a tough, tough time.
Okay. So fair enough to say you grow up a normal kid and a really organic, good,
old fashioned American family went to college, you're checking the boxes, doing
what you supposed to get your degree, marry the quarterback, and then the world kind of falls apart and you found yourself
Single financially struggling having to feed three miles. Yep, and
Did you cry? They were the nights we cried. Oh, yeah, we scared I
Mean scared in terms of I'm not gonna be able to pay my bills. I'll be put out
Oh, yeah, in fact, my boys remember very well.
Well, my daughter was a hard baby too,
so I mean, that's as exhausting.
I was dealing with her 24-7, but they remember the day,
I sat him down and said, you know what guys,
I just need a little help.
And I think we might have to move to Colorado
for just a little bit of a living.
My parents to try to get my feet under me again
And my oldest said I don't I'm not leaving my friends. I don't leave my family. I'll stay with dad and
It I will just never forget that moment because did that shatter you well. I just knew it wasn't an option
Right, I just knew in that moment. I'm not leaving my kids. I got to figure this out.
I got to do whatever I got to do.
So my mom and father were divorced when I was four.
Okay.
And my mom was subsequently married divorced a number of times after that.
She was not a good picker of men. And I remember if I got straight A's in a week back then the grading periods were six weeks.
Okay.
And if I got straight A's for my six weeks thing, I got to go to Wendy's.
That was like, oh boy, you know, that was a big thing. And, you know, today,
I mean, I, it almost seems like a lifetime ago to me. But it is my reality. And it is the reason
that I think the way I do because I remember that struggle. And that struggle is fearful.
And I know it's fearful for my mom worried about
What we were gonna have to do we also did the grandparent thing a couple times
but
You know, it's also
scary for a kid
Yeah, and they won't often verbalize it or show it to their parent
but I lived it and
You don't want to lose your friends. You don't want to lose whatever house it is you have and you really don't even know that you're broke
you just
don't want things to change too much. Yeah, and
I wonder
Did you feel that ever?
I wonder, did you feel that ever?
Yeah, I was always mindful of, especially my oldest is very sensitive. And he knew when I was struggling, he knew the nights I was crying, right?
And worried and stressed.
And he, I still haven't, he wrote me all notes all the time.
And you know, said, it's okay.
They're going to be okay.
You know, and, and now we talk about it. And, you know, they tell me things I didn't know, it's okay. They're gonna be okay, you know, and and now we talk about it
And you know they tell me things I didn't know
Probably back then tell me one well. Oh gosh. I mean
Divorsh is just hard to begin with. I mean they were I didn't know they ever knew I cried and had those nights
Of course good stuff my son heard yeah, he's described him in detail to me and I felt so bad.
And he went on a church mission right out of high school, which was another cultural
thing with the Mormon religion.
He went to Madagascar and as he was leaving and I was, you know, it's a big deal.
He kind of, I think that's just east of South Africa.
I mean, that's way down.
I knew nothing about this country.
I was researching it, obviously.
You don't know.
You know, that takes a lot of courage and faith for someone
to, you don't know...
Take off.
Where you're heading, who you're gonna be.
It's a kind of a crazy time.
And I was trying to give him my best pep talk at the time
about, you know, just try to love these people
and you'll feel like they'll be your home,
they'll be your family, you know, and he said, Mom,
you don't have to worry about me.
He said, I've been homesick my whole life.
And I said, it took me a minute and then it kind of broke my heart a little bit because
I've been home sick.
Hang on just a second.
I've been home sick.
I've been home sick.
Don't worry.
I know what home sick feels like because, you know, their dad was in their life and a good
father.
So a lot of women don't have that.
But for a child who's got to go back and forth and he would say that as a little boy,
when I'm with you, I miss dad, When I'm with you, I miss dad.
When I'm with dad, I miss you.
And they can never really,
oh, get me.
No, that's okay.
That's the reality of divorce.
And half of families are living that way.
And a lot of kids don't get to see their dads,
and that's even harder, but the ones that do,
they're longing for mom.
They want that family.
So, you know, he's a big six, five great, strong kid.
And when, you know, kind of broke my heart,
but I also knew that I felt that
because they couldn't fully enjoy Disneyland with dad
because mom's not there.
And, you know, and I wasn't able to take them on trips like that.
So I'm trying to make it as fun as I can in my chaotic, you know,
single mom life.
Did you feel competition with your ex-susment?
No, I really didn't a lot do a lot do.
And I'm grateful.
I don't know.
It's a little bit my personality.
I don't, but my kids did.
I remember they went to Hawaii.
He got remarried after a few years and they went on some trips and you know, they were
able to have a lot of experiences with their dad that a lot of kids don't because dads
a lot of times take off after the divorce.
But I remember them wanting to show me their video of Hawaii and all these things they did
and then he stopped and he said, I feel bad.
And I was like, oh, no, I didn't want him to feel that way.
I truly wasn't, I truly didn't feel jealous.
I was at peace that we just weren't a good match.
We never had a bad ugly divorce.
But the point is the kids feel all that.
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I remember feeling that kind of stuff. And
I
The reason I'm asking about this is not to try to jerk tears out of you, but
Or to make you feel even remotely guilty because I know as a single mom you've done everything you can possibly do because I watched my mom do everything
She could possibly do but the thing is
With about a 50% divorce right in our country do everything she could possibly do, but the thing is,
with about a 50% divorce right in our country, that's bad for the adults,
but the kids didn't divorce anybody.
Exactly.
They showed up and they're in it,
not by any choice or doing of their own,
and it's traumatic for a child. And then when you take the trauma
of a child having to choose between parents, having to balance between parents, not wanting
to hurt one another's parents' feelings, just like you've described, being pulled back
and forth on Thanksgiving and Christmas and summer trips and all of that.
That's enough trauma or a child with a divorced parent who didn't even get to experience anything with the other parent because other parent abandoned them.
All of that is extraordinarily traumatic and formative on a child and then you throw in on it economic difficulty and we
wonder why these children oftentimes grow up with emotional scars. Yeah, oh yeah, you
nailed it. So I'm trying to paint a picture and the picture is kid grows up good parent family
Moves around goes to place high school and then college ball may as the quarterback
Starts to sound out little fairy tell us and just a few years later you found yourself with three kids struggling
with all kinds of issues
Which is unfortunately fairly common, I think, in our society.
And you do start having a little bit of success with your real estate business.
And now tell me, again, you were invited on something to Brazil.
I don't, I, what it was a mission.
So, yes, I had, at this point, I had a friend who, you know, the market crashed. Fortunately,
I got in with some really good people that were neighbors. I had known for a long time.
We started working like the short sell for closure market. Pretty hard. And I had a friend
who wanted to, he had never invested in real estate, but wanted to start investing some of the short sales
that we had.
So we became really close friends,
and my oldest was struggling at the time.
You know, he's kind of going through puberty.
What does that mean?
Oh, just, okay.
Yeah, he was just,
he was a really good kid,
but just really having struggles and depressed,
and you know, I thought,
you're the perfect kid, you know,
how, you know, I was trying to figure out a way to help him so my it's funny you're the perfect kid. Well you know
no no I know I get it but I mean when you when you think about all that his emotions and heart
or bearing yeah of course he was struggling I know and I probably let me taste I'm realizing how much I was a pretty good athlete coming up and everything else and all that and
I
felt like such a second-class citizen because I didn't have a dad in the games and
and
I struggled with it into my 40s. Really? Oh yeah. Wow.
Yeah, so a kid going through puberty, struggling with it is just not at all surprising to me.
Yeah.
But you're dealing with that.
I probably didn't understand it at the time what all he was feeling obviously, but even
though he had a dad, we're also in a very, you know, religious community was not typical to have divorce.
None of his friends had divorced.
And there was teasing about, you know, and stuff that I probably didn't understand at the
time.
And then you add on the other thing, he's real hard on himself.
He's naturally very athletic kid and all that.
But he just was really just struggling more than I didn't know how to help him.
I didn't know how to connect with him. I would try to tell him to look for things he could do for other people and he genuinely wanted to
because he can't, he said, what do you mean, what do I do? Give someone a ride. He was thinking about it.
But he didn't know what to do. And so then here my friend, he had started a company that was very successful MLM business and he had created this
Foundation that was in Brazil and they had missions is what they called them
They would send people over to help out in these orphanages and rebuild schools and do all kinds of things in Brazil
And I heard all the stories and he said
Why don't you take him you guys should go on the next mission and I'll pay for it and you go and I heard all the stories and he said, why don't you take him?
You guys should go on the next mission
and I'll pay for it and you go
and it'll be amazing and it'll be wonderful.
And I love the idea,
but it sparked an idea in my heart that said,
well, why do these all have to be in like so far away?
Why I hear about these awesome humanitarian things
and what they do for people's lives,
but how can we do the same,
how can we have that same experience here?
Because you're nice to offer to pay for my kids.
It's not cheap to do that.
Most families can't do that.
What about all these other friends of mine,
all the single moms, I know,
and they can't go.
I want something that we can connect with people and just be here in our community.
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We'll be right back. So your friend doing the thing of Brazil, planted the seed.
It entice you to plant it and it's planted a seed of Yeah doing something for someone who's more disadvantaged is great, but
You decided you want to do it on a more local basis. Yeah, it really planted a seed that
This felt like I want something more. I was surviving at that point
I was I was finally feeling successful and real estate and
I was grateful to be where I was at but I also felt like you know and there
was even times I couldn't believe some of the checks I was I didn't think I
would ever have a check worth that you know but it it it kind of very quickly
became meaningless in a way because I just felt more busy.
I felt more stress.
I felt more hustle and worry.
And I got to keep up with the next thing now.
And I'm meanwhile missing the point, like, you know,
of life here.
I've got to have something else.
Yeah, so yeah, you got out of all the stress
that you found yourself in and it created another
ball of stress, which I think is really normal for people.
I think the older we get, our stressors change, but the level of stress doesn't necessarily
diminish.
Yeah.
Well, when I start telling you the story, this idea came to me very quickly.
You know, the seed was planted, and the desire was there.
I knew there's something. I want to do something.
And once I got the idea, I actually was just talking out loud one day in my office to another girl.
I want to do something like this. And because my background was real estate, and I enjoyed fixing houses up,
and I'd done some flips by then. People would ask me
to help them, you know, and that was my gift. You know, that was my thing I could do. I
could go clean up your house and fix. And I was telling her, why do I want to do something?
This is what we can do, you know? Just our friends, we can clean, we can organize their
house, rearrange the front, make it feel good, fix their kids' rooms and someone overheard me talking who actually had a local real estate show just on In Salt Lake
and he was kind of getting bored of the content
just showing houses and stuff and he said,
hey, I really like this idea.
Like let's, you know, let's do this.
Yeah.
He literally in that little moment called his camera guy, you know, this is a little rinky dink thing
But and asked him
You know what your schedule it and he
Confirmed like it was like three weeks out
We're gonna film this thing. She's gonna do this. We're gonna put it on the show
We need something like this on show you came up with it and now you're gonna be filmed in three weeks
And you don't even know what it is. I didn't know what it is. I had no name. I had no ideas.
I had no money.
It was just summing my heart.
And I was acting like I knew what I was talking about
enough that he went with it.
He was either desperate enough for something
or I sounded stupid.
So because he's got a camera, you got to have a name.
Is that the deal?
Kind of.
I mean, yeah.
So at this point, I had a business partner.
I went to him and said, hey, I want to do this.
And I said what I want to do.
I want to go to single parents, probably mainly single moms.
That's my passion.
I want to help them out.
I want to give them a day with their kids to go have fun.
And I want to just get my friends and clean and do the honey
dues, like fix a leaky fall.
Just those things.
Just basic, right?
So let them leave. go have a day,
and come back to a repurposed home.
Exactly, that's all it was.
I told my business partner,
what do you think of this idea?
And he said, I like it.
And he started telling me,
he should brand it with your real estate business
and was, so you're thinking like extreme home makeover.
He started giving me these names. And I said, no, nothing. He said,
you got to have it something. So it highlights your real estate, because that'll be
really where, you know, that's where charities can really help a business. And so he kept telling me,
I have something with real estate or homes in it. And it never felt right. And I, it I it was you know here we only have three weeks
to come up with this whole thing. So it was several days later but I was talking to my mom on the
phone I said I don't I don't want it to have anything with the home it's more than that.
It's gonna be lots of it's like just all kinds of little miracles I just said it out loud talking to her and I said that's it. Little
mer... That's the name. That is what this is. It's not houses. It's little miracles. So now
that we know how we came up with the name little miracles, to paraphrase little miracles, you know, I don't want people to think that this is extreme
home makeover with a bus and people rolling up and all this.
It is a divorced mom with three kids who felt and understood the things we talked about, which is anxiety, frustration, some shame, so you
identified deeply with these moms and you understand what it is to struggle
financially with all of these other things going on and they're psyche.
Trying to put a... trying to put some lipstick on and a smile on their face for their children
and trying to be a brave mom,
but probably melting into a pillow at night,
crying herself to sleep,
because of all the things that they feel.
And the little miracle is, you just wanna give
a random mom that's in this situation,
a nice day out with her kids. And then while they're gone,
you want to clean their house, you want to fold some clothes, maybe slap some pain on a wall,
and just give them something nice for a change. That's it, right? That was it. You know, for a single mom's kid, that's a great day to
for the children, it's a great day. And I have a soft spot for the kids. And you know, I knew we were
going to talk about the moms because you were one in that position, which is what obviously gave you the drive to do this, but the kids, I mean,
the kids to be able to have it a day where they get to see their mom happy and smile,
where they get to see their mom actually not look frazzled, stressed out and just enjoyable,
and then they get to come home to something nice in this home when as yours are, so many of these kids are homesick,
that makes the sickness not so bad probably.
Oh, yeah. I mean, it's impossible to describe. I could have never imagined, you know, when we started this, I just wanted, yeah, mom to have a good day
and come home to a clean house. So tell me about, don't worry about leading up to it. We get it
yet three weeks. You're probably running all the place beggin bar and stealing. Tell me about the
very first one. Tell me, tell me who it was and how it went. And well well first of all, a mom or dad, a mom, how many children?
Five kids.
And her husband divorced.
Yeah, he's been divorced.
He was not much in the picture.
Okay, so basically a mom or a mom with five kids.
Yep. And she had three jobs.
Three jobs.
How do you work three jobs and make sure the kids are like cared for?
Yeah.
Exactly.
How do you do that?
Exactly.
A lot of times what you can't do at all and the house is one of the first things to go.
Disdestroyed.
It's destroyed.
It's not clean.
It's disorganized.
No one's changed an air filter and who knows how many years the things that are broken
There's a cup in the windowsill catch in the water leaking because they don't know how to actually this
First the first oh yeah, yeah, yeah, oh yeah, okay. Yeah, how'd you found her?
You know, I just started telling friends. Hey, I want to do this and some friends said hey
I know I know someone who's such a great mom, my friend, and yeah, so I said, give her a number. How old were
her kids? Out of curiosity. Her oldest was about, I mean, they were all in the home. The oldest
was 16 or 17 and the youngest was maybe five or six. How did this woman get out of bed
every day? I have no idea. And what I found out, she, her kids were everything to her.
You know, she was the mom that...
Well, that's how then.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Exactly.
Do you call her and just say, hey, listen, you don't know us, but we'd like to have your house
for a day and we're going to send you off somewhere.
Yeah.
I mean...
You sickly.
I mean, how do you, how'd she respond to that?
You know what?
It'd be like, get away from me.
You know what? I won't. I mean, how do you respond to that? You know what? Be like, get away from me.
You know, ironically as crazy as this first one was and I was like trying to just just trust
me, I don't know what, you know, and I wasn't. What did you say to her? I said, hey, I know
your friend, Jen, Davies, and I'm trying to do this thing. I'm starting. It's like, can
I stop by and talk to you? It'll make more sense. Can I come over and fold some towels?
Yeah, that's kind of weird if you think about it.
It really is.
It really is.
And not just the first time, it's the whole time we kept that same spirit about it with
us.
We kind of stay with the first one because we're going to get to the next one.
Yeah, okay.
So what is her response?
Do you remember?
Um, okay.
I just said, I felt weird telling her on the phone.
I said, can I stop buying that? I thought if thought if she met me it wouldn't it wouldn't seem so
weird yeah she let me come over and I just told her listen I've been a single mom
I'm just trying to do something I don't know I'm just trying to start all I said was
can we like find out a little bit about what you guys like to do together maybe
just let you guys have a fun day for I even said just maybe a few hours on a Saturday and we're just gonna kind of clean and do some stuff at your house
if you're okay with that, you feel okay, it's kind of weird, you don't know me. Yeah.
You feel like Jen can come, my friend, that knows us both. Yeah.
So she was reluctant but, I bet. But grateful right off that somebody was even willing to
notice everything.
I thought you were pretty weird.
Yeah, oh yeah.
Alright, so where'd you send she and the kid?
What's her name?
Her name is Julie Warner.
Okay, Julie.
Where did you send Julie and the crew?
Well, what was so awesome about this was what started out as just a few hours?
What do you guys like to do?
They like to go bowling.
They love movies.
We were like, okay, cool.
We'll send you a letter, have a movie. I don't go bowling get some pizza that we can manage that right we can do this
We can clean tell me things aren't working in your house little things
well I started just putting the word out to people and
What was amazing was within days of the word spreading?
This turned into,
oh, I want help, I want help.
Let me ask something to turn into just an army
of normal folks.
An army of normal folks.
And you know what?
Everybody has something,
and I just got to what do you know how to do?
Who do you know that might know how to do something?
Well, do you want to come and see if we need your help?
You know, everybody has something just figure out what that is what they go
Well, we ended up having people wanting to redo fluorine and all that. I mean she had holes
She needed more time. So we need a more time
So we said hey are you up for an overnight or it was Halloween of all nights and she's got young kids
But they said okay, We sent them to Park City
Oh cool up the mountain up the mountain
It wasn't very far, but the kids had the kids had never been there in about an hour about an 45 minutes
Yeah, yeah, the park city is beautiful. It's beautiful town
Had a friend that knew somebody who had a hotel. They'll let them stay there for free, you know, let them
Hey, okay, cool. Maybe someone will chip in on their dinner and they'll buy a little, we just had this
hotel. They got to go to an ice dinner and
proceed and stay in a cool hotel. Stay in a nice hotel on Main Street. Oh, in October
31st. It was snowing, yes, up there. So they got to walk Main Street. They got to do all
that. They got to get ice cream at that place on Main Street. There's a good ice cream.
There is. Impressed, you know,. Yeah, they gotta do all that.
You know, and hear these kids just live down the hill.
They never been up there.
It was a major getaway for them.
All right, so they roll.
They roll.
All right, hold it.
Do they have a car?
Yes, on this one, the first one,
we sent them up in their car.
But we kind of decided, like, we didn't want them to stress it.
We had a few activities planned. So the first night, they kept their car, but we kind of decided, like, we didn't want them to stress it. We had a few activities planned.
So the first night they kept their car then the second night we had someone who was a driver
that was willing to go up and drive them to the place.
So she didn't have to, I don't want to worry about time, where to go.
I don't worry about it.
We're going to take care of it.
Get the drivers pick any guys up.
We're going to have a fun day driver for the divorce mom of us.
Yep. love it.
So when there there
man bus that had news it was cool.
Yeah, so when they're there and the kids probably feel like rock stars.
Oh totally.
I how many people descended on this woman's home?
I would say the first project we at least had 70.
70?
75.
I really thought you were going to say 20 or 25,
but that's not for purposes' show.
I really am, I'm 70.
Yeah.
We'll be right back. Let's return to Tiani and what Little Miracles did at their very first home.
She had new floors, new cabinets in the kitchen. They were falling apart.
Somebody put new cabinets in her kitchen. She owned the home. So she got the home in
the divorce, but of course it didn't have the money to keep it up. Exactly. And it was
very, very commonly situations. So what else? cabinets floor cabinets, the floor, which
was huge
Did you get that for in cabinets donated donated completely? It was a small house. It wasn't a ton people were so great. They were so willing in fact
We this project was interesting. We had someone willing to donate granite and I I turned it down on that way
I said I didn't feel right about it. We didn't really need granite.
I appreciated it, but the countertops, they were good.
I really didn't want this to be extreme home makeover
like the nicest stuff,
because I felt like I wanna do this all the time.
I don't want people burning out.
We don't really need.
I'm sitting here thinking, why not?
But what you're saying is,
you knew you were going back to the till for another one.
And you didn't want to blow it all right.
I didn't want to, yeah.
And I wanted to focus.
So did you paint rooms?
So what we did, that was just worked beautifully,
is, I mean, so overwhelming.
I don't know what I'm doing.
I'm faking it.
You know, my business partner had a nonprofit
wasn't using that we were able to umbrella under.
So I didn't even have an offer.
I'm profit.
A 501c3, so I could get donations, you know, and write-offs for people.
But I just had so many people like, I want to help.
I want to help.
So I was like, okay.
I just started dividing people up in rooms.
And I would say, you've got Bailey.
She's seven.
She loves pink.
She loves dragons. She loves this. She loves that.
So here's the 30,000 foot view. Do something. Yes.
And you know what?
Not exactly laid out and managed. You just said, this is who she is, this is what she like. You guys have this room.
You run with it. Don't screw it up.
And I said, this is what's worked for me. Go to Target, go to Home Depot.
If you talk to a manager, they're usually pretty cool.
They can give you a couple hundred bucks,
so you get started with, but just see if you can help.
There's no one, a lot of the people,
people from all walks of life, you know,
people that own the lumber company
that were great to donate here and there,
people that own the floor.
Yeah, over there on the company, they're awesome.
They really are.
But we also had a lot of single parents that got it,
that wanted to be a part of this,
that didn't have the money, I say, it's okay.
Go see if you can talk, you know,
a little bit here, a little bit there.
We'll help you.
We'll help you.
So this was like, there was five kids,
a couple of them were sharing,
but I mean, most of the rooms are bedroom.
So we just, literally everybody was over one room
And we had a painter that did all the paint you know the same color and then I said you know
We don't really have money, but if you want to raise some money and try to get new furniture or try to get new bedding or whatever
I mean it was amazing. Yes, in fact
She's a good sport about this story, but she was embarrassed at first
There was a little nest of mice living in her couch
When we went to move it that we found we're like
Throw it out and then we're like we don't have a couch
We don't have a couch for her and somebody went to RC Willie the furniture
Like this is like a couple hours before they're coming home.
We're like, we need a couch for this family.
Someone go talk to, you know, if this is that type of cast,
or just see if they'll donate something,
tell them what we're doing, invite them to come over.
We're gonna welcome them home here.
Maybe they'll give us a deal.
We'll scrape up the money.
Just, we gotta have a couch for this family.
This couch shows up.
People through the grapevine, a girl runs into someone she knew at the store.
Oh, she knew the manager and they end up this beautiful sectional.
We're moving it in like minutes before they came home.
We're talking about a couch. We're talking about a couch.
Oh, it was a nice sectional for her whole family.
They were movie people.
They, you know, they just had one little family room,
but that couch was like heaven for them.
They loved, it was brand new.
It had the reclining, everybody had a spot,
and they just loved this couch.
And it came in, it was one of those split level houses
back in the 80s, everybody had that.
And we're moving this couch in over the you know
banister minutes before they're coming home and it fit perfectly and it was just one of those
moments of like this is just a little miracle this is it I mean talk about
that happened every time over and over just everything just came together at the last minute
and was so perfect hey I could be here for hours telling you guys stories about that
So they come down from the mountain. They've had mountain and truthfully
Just the day in Park City probably would have been a lot. Well
Bill you get this because you grew up as a single
You know with a single mom
Even I didn't understand that because my kids
grew up this way.
What I realized later, what brought tears to her eyes,
the most was that day with her kids.
She got to have a stress free day
and she got to show her kids herself.
Yes.
Something more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything.
That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. That was more meaningful than anything. And so on that day though, with all the stress gone and not having to worry about any of it,
her kids got to experience fur.
Yes.
Which is amazing.
And what you just said kind of came to my mind, you know, as they're coming home, what
are we doing here when they come home, what, you know, how, what do we want to have happen
here?
And I had that thought, I wanted her kids, not that they didn't know, because I knew
they knew she had a reputation of having the best birthday parties in the neighborhood.
She always had the kids over. She was as best as she could. She was the fun mom, you know,
working three jobs and craziest could be, but, you know, we, I wanted her kids to know
just how amazing she was, you know?
Sort of from someone else.
Sort of a moment.
Because that's another part that I feel like kids lose is,
they're not having a mom and dad sort of edify each other
and brag on the other one a little and show,
you know, it gives these kids,
my dad did that for my mom and vice versa.
And I remember what it did to me as a kid thinking,
I have a really great dad.
Because my mom told me that all the time.
Do you know what a great dad you know how lucky
you kids are to have such a great dad.
He puts you first.
And I thought, wow, I do.
And I adored my dad because of that.
But the problem is that divorced parents kids don't hear that
They don't ever hear it and here is a mother who is doing
More than most, but her kids see the chaos and they don't get to see her essence and her house is a mess
And they don't wise our house messy and there isn't why why is our house falling apart?
so
Forget So forget, forget beyond this, I dined understand when they roll up from the mountain and they hit the door.
Does she, she must just melt. It's a beautiful moment. So another, another little thing that happened
during this time when I was, before I had talked out out loud and said I want to do this and I was thinking about it. I laid down with my
daughter to get it up all asleep one night and I was flipping through my phone
and this video came on and just so happened it's a video from someone called
David Archaleta, the song's called Glorious and it's such a powerful video.
You have to listen to it.
It's our theme.
So I knew in that moment before I got off her bed
that that was calling to me
because the whole song is everyone plays the piece.
Everyone has a gift.
Just follow your heart.
You'll figure out what it is, just do it.
And I had been feeling I need to do something.
And that song spoke to me.
I got up, I went downstairs, I had my boys pull it up
on the TV, watch this with me.
We're doing this, we're gonna do this.
This is such a, you know, this is song
is talking to me right now.
So that has been our theme song.
So when the family comes home,
you play it.
David Archaleta, glorious.
Well, we have a little dance party before, actually,
because we are working hard.
It is not glamorous.
We're exhausted and we're like telling everybody
the family's about to come.
And so we wanted to be out on the street.
We were red, red balloons.
We wanted him to feel like,
Bob starts.
And this is the first one.
Yeah, the first time we were blue,
because I'd grown up with, and I said,
nope, after that I changed it to red.
Reds a powerful color.
Yeah, I said nope.
You want some coagures to use.
Exactly. Because it's a powerful color.
So, the first time, but I knew the feeling.
I wanted him to feel like rock stars.
Come pull it down the street and they see everybody.
And we're having fun. So so we had a guy that was a
friend use of painter he had a DJ equipment great okay so he would get everybody doing the
YMJ. The painter doubled is the DJ. He did. Yeah Jose Provador. He was awesome. Jose Provador.
Jose Provador of the painter slash DJ. Yep. Of course. He is amazing.
I love it.
So they get there.
I really want to when the door opens.
What does she say?
Well, if you hear the song, so I'm always like, we stop the dance party music as they're pulling
up the street and we hit that song.
And it is powerful right off the bat. You just have to hear it and they pull up and it's just a moment. No one's saying anything.
Our producers worth a salt during when this is actually being listened to will have that song in the background. You got to play the song.
You can see Alex out there. I'm not sure if he'll pull it off or not. Yeah. well, if you can, it'd be worth it. You got it.
We actually would have to get the right answer.
I know.
I actually will try to reach out to him and pull it off.
Don't cut this out.
That is you being weak.
OK, go ahead.
Does the songs play?
Oh, the songs.
The painters playing music.
Yes, he hits it.
Yes, the door.
And it's just love.
It's just love.
That's all it is.
It's random strangers hugging these people.
Some people you know, some people,
you feel like you know the family,
even if you don't, because you've been there working,
you're not all day all night.
You've got to tell me the kids are sprinting
to the rooms to see what's up.
Well, we don't let them go in just yet.
We have this moment we're listening into the whole song. Hugging everybody. It's just to feel, take it in. Feel the moment here.
Right, it's great.
Feel these people love you.
Human beings, just doing something for another human thing.
Yeah. Just good old fashioned.
I just because it's your turn.
Not because you're the pity store.
You're it's just your turn.
It's your neighbors here helping you.
It's your day.
And I wanted them to feel that and just take it in.
So that's what that song is during the whole song.
It's just everybody hugging each other.
The kids of pain and welcome home, you know,
and there's balloons and everybody's just in the red.
And then when the song's over,
whoever nominated the family takes the mic for a second, just a second, and tell us
why.
Why did you?
Because that's the only rule with our little miracles.
You can't nominate yourself.
That's really the rule.
That's a really good rule.
Yeah, but otherwise, you know, it doesn't have to look a certain way.
You don't have to need all these, not every story is a dramatic story, some are, some aren't.
Just tell us why you nominated the family, tell us a little.
And I also wanted that to be a moment for these kids to hear what the mother is saying.
Why their mom is so great.
You know why all these people are here?
Not just, we're here for you.
You kids are amazing.
Cause like you said, you didn't choose this.
Your life's a little tougher, but you're amazing.
And your mom, you know what she does for you?
So it was like a moment for someone.
They knew to tell the amazing things that their mom does
for them that maybe they don't see.
And why everybody wanted to be here.
And you know what, when they heard it was your family,
look at all these people.
Everybody heard about you and wanted to be here,
because you guys are awesome, and you're special,
and you deserve it, and we just want you to,
nothing else, you feel that every day
if you ever wonder.
If you're loved, you remember today.
I mean, for the mom, I'm here in this and I, you know, for some, it could be life-changing,
but for all, it would have to be life-affirming.
It would have to be life-affirming for a single mom, fighting and struggling.
All the things we talked about, the anxiety, the bills, the fear, the shame, and everything else to be affirmed as, I'm a human being with value, and although I'm struggling, these
children are proof of my value and affirmation.
And it's an opportunity just for them to feel bad.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's pretty special.
Would you please tell me what happens when they go in the house?
Oh, it's awesome.
So we learned, you can't let everybody, you know,
we get typically lots of 100 people,
we've had so many people, you can't let everyone run in.
So our rule is if you worked on the room,
specifically, you get a head start,
you get to go in the room, so you get to see that.
So you get to show them around what you've done.
We've got to wear if the mom wants to say something, but we never, you know,
have the time they'll want to say something, have the time it's overwhelming. So we
just let them go through, you know, and I'm not usually the one going through,
it's kind of the one that nominated them who, you know, has a little bit of comfort,
you know, and a bunch of strangers, You know, I usually always meet the family's prior, but I like to let that be their moment
to walk through. Plus whoever nominate them, we're like, hey, you're not just nominated
them and we're doing everything. You're in this with us, right? If you really want this
for your friend, your sister, you know, you're in it with us, right?
Yeah, you'll get to nominate.
And yeah, so they're a big part of the project. And so they're the front and center and
leading them through. And it's just amazing. And so what? And yeah, so they're a big part of the project and so they're the front and center and leading
them through and it's just amazing.
And so let me have something.
Do you in during this process, you kind of step back?
Yeah, I don't know why I found myself.
I kind of just, you know, sometimes I say stuff when they first come or whatever, but
I kind of watch and I hang back a little bit and just kind of take it all in.
I mean, it's overwhelming. I'm not a real emotional person, but that's my moment to kind of just be like,
because I'm exhausted. It's a lot, you know, this month is nine years you've been doing it, and
there's a lot of times going in. I'm like, this is the last time I'm doing this.
So, and I'm just taking it in at that point, and I'm always so grateful that we didn't decide
to quit because that thought comes in my mind every day.
So what year was this?
Do you remember?
20, 30.
It's nine years ago now.
So what are we in?
Is it 2013?
Yeah, 2013.
Yeah, that was Halloween.
And so after this little experiment of yours, you said, we're going to do this again.
Yeah, I really wanted to do it again.
A lot of work.
What was interesting now, we had them filming it for the local TV thing. Right. Oh, yeah, that's right. And I wondered
Will we really have this much help if we don't have the TV?
So I didn't know if is is that why everyone was so good
about helping out?
You know, because they want to see themselves on a TV.
People knew it was on TV.
We're going to say your business if you helped out.
Obviously that's going on the little clip.
But I knew we definitely wanted to do it again.
When it came together in the show actually aired,
it was a little disappointing
because the guy who put together the show,
he had highlighted his contractors
that were part of his show,
but they weren't the ones that did the work.
And he did a little editing to where they went back after
and added some things that weren't really done.
You hear that Alex, please don't screw the show up.
All your stuff.
Yeah, it did it.
Tell him.
It does hurt the whole deal.
Tell him.
Don't do that.
I'll let it be his thing.
That's right.
This is how we're going to do this.
Yeah.
We had a big party and I remember we all just like a little bit like, oh, that's not really how it went down.
You know, and I felt bad.
And I had to have a conversation with them.
So you're saying that sometimes TV portrays things
as they're not?
Yeah, I've found that out.
Yeah.
It's the way it works.
And sometimes they want to build up the people.
I said, well, wait, what?
The people who helped, they didn't actually care that their name,
but you can't not put their name on and put,
you said, yeah, unfortunately.
I know.
He said, yeah, I have to because they're part of my group.
That happens all too much.
Yeah.
2013, you do this thing.
How long till the next one?
So let's see, that was October.
Gosh, what's crazy is right after you do one it happens every time
Somebody tells about another family. Yeah, right for sure. So I want to say it was like February
So how many months a couple months? Yeah, and
From 2013 when you get an epiphany
And from 2013, when you get an epiphany,
that you're gonna call a thing, little miracles, and you have three weeks to kind of pull us off,
and you don't even know what this is.
It is, yep.
And it ends up being the experience that we just described.
Now it's 2022, and you do four of these a year?
We do one every quarter, typically.
So yeah, four, generally.
Sometimes we've done more.
Which, since October of 2014, the numbers I have here are
1,827 volunteers,
86 families served,
27 community serves,
and 9,844 volunteer hours, all of which have basically enriched the
lives of a whole bunch of kids who desperately need to have something enriching happening in
their lives and all bunch of divorce spouses who are struggling with anxiety and shame,
and concern, and fear, and worry, and all of a sudden they get a day that their children get
to see them for the people they are and they get to come home to a better place to live. Amen.
and they get to come home to a better place to live. Amen.
All because some normal kid that grew up in Colorado
who experienced a little tough life to side it,
you know, we don't have to go do missions in Brazil.
There's an opportunity to do a mission right here in my hometown.
And you put together an army of just normal folks who wanted to give and serve
just for the simple edification of another human being that needed it.
Is that what I'm hearing? How's what you're hearing?
And that concludes part one of our conversation with Tiani, notably with our normal music,
because our weak producer clearly didn't get permission to use the music that Tiani
was talking about.
So, you got the basic, I don't know what this kind of music is when we leave, but whatever
that stuff is.
Anyway, I hope you'll listen to part two that's now available. Her story really
does just keep getting better, but if you don't, make sure you join an army of normal folks at
NormalFoces.us and sign up to become a member of the movement. By signing up, you receive a weekly
email in short episode summaries in case you happen to miss an episode or you may just prefer
reading about our incredible guest. Guys, together, we
can change this country, but it starts with you. I'll see you in part two.