And That's Why We Drink - E391 A Penultimate Show and a Bonus Drinking Game Round

Episode Date: August 4, 2024

It's episode 391 and if you see a blue skeleton in your lucid dreams, it just means that Abraham Lincoln's ghost is nearby! Our eyeballs are currently bleeding from all the brand new ghost hunt footage we're watching for the new tour this fall, so we thought we'd take a walk down memory lane this week with some nostalgic early, early live show audio, and what better way to start thinking about kicking off our tour in Newark, New Jersey and Sleepy Hollow, New York than revisiting our show in Albany! Em tells the ghost stories of not only the New York State Capital but also gives us a little side dish of the haunts of Fort William Henry at Lake George. Then Christine tells the wild, tragic and mind-bending tale of the murder of Peter Porco. Hopefully we all see some little butter-orbs flying by this week for good luck! ...and that's why we drink!We're coming in H-O-T Newark and Sleepy Hollow! Get your tickets for our brand new live show this September - we can't wait to share all our new spooky secrets with you! andthatswhywedrink.com/live

Hello, everybody. Welcome to another week, another installment, another rousing episode of Your Favorite Podcast, and That's What We Drink, starring your favorite podcast host, M. Schulz. The other one is not here right now. How do we say this? I guess the her scene shifter, you know her well, her and I, we got swept up in life, as they might say this week.

And so an episode, recording episode was just not doable with her being a rock star and touring and me going through my half of prepping for our live show, things just got kind of overwhelming. So what we're going to do is we are showing you or presenting to you in lieu of a new episode, a live episode from one of our very early tours. This is from our Albany show. This was a lifetime ago. I don't know exactly what you're going to hear. It's going to be interesting, probably. You're going to hear our tiny little baby voices

who just haven't even experienced half the things that we have in the last few years. So you'll hear purity and innocence and naivete. So I hope you enjoy that, while also listening to the grisly, dastardly crimes that we probably talk about. So I hope you have a good time. And while I have you speaking of Albany, not too far from Albany is Newark, New Jersey and Tarrytown, AKA Sleepy Hollow, New York. And I bring those up because those are the first two stops on our new tour,

Poor Decisions. They will be September 12th and September 13th. Please come on down and, you know, see what we've got going on. It's very different than the live show you're about to hear for this week's episode. You want to see us go ghost hunting and get the pants scared off of us? And maybe you'll laugh, maybe you'll cry, maybe you'll have a moment with the person sitting next to you, maybe you fall in love. I don't know. You tell me. Find out in New York and New Jersey. And that is early September. So please go to our website, get our tickets, and we'll see you there. Bye. Hello. Is this thing on? Hello. Anyone out there? Can you hear us? If you're listening, hello, welcome to And That's Why We Drink live. Live, we're here with you live guys.

A couple things real quick. We just want to say thank you for letting us come into your city because wow that is a lucky call on our end. Thank you for having us. We are so excited to see all of you guys in person in a few short moments but before we get started, we have a couple little announcements. Yes, first of all, please no photography. Also put your phones away, but make sure you fill up those drinks

because it's about to get fucking weird. We are gonna have a good time guys. So get your drinks full, pocket those phones, and I guess, do we walk out now? No, I think here's what we should do. I think we should walk out, but first we should play the, and that's why we pony if you will Oh, that's right. I guess we do that part first. Yeah. Yeah, we should play that

I think I think everyone have a good time with that But I think everyone should clap then and then we should go out But if they don't clap then we don't go out if they don't clap we're not going anywhere, right? So and that's why we pony then they clap and then we make like quite a grand entrance. Everyone's gonna be so excited Oh, yeah, we're gonna have a blast. Alright, listen, English is my first language. Is Tamara home? Sassy with me, Sassy the Clown. The clown is shut.

I find a cool sweet cup of milk. Finish your drink. And that's why we drink! Hello Albany. Oh ow hi. You're my uncle. Hi. How are you? Hello.

Didn't know you were coming. Hello. It's a family you? Hello. Didn't know you were coming. Hello. It's a family reunion. Hello. You're my aunt. Hi. Hello. You're my cut. Now I don't have anybody. Nobody's here to support me, but it's fine. They are. Oh, team lemons here. Okay. Good. Thank you. Okay. Well, hello Albany. Hello Albany. Hi, let's start over. Hi. I started the evening with some vodka, so I'm doing it different tonight. So good luck.

Good luck to me and good luck to you. We'll see what happens. Thank you for being our penultimate show of the tour. We have one more show after this and then we're done. Someone just went, that's my favorite word. I think you were the only person who cared that I used that word. I cared. But we only have one more show after this and then we're done for the entire year touring. Surprise. I know. Don't go. I know. You're gonna miss us so much. It's really hard. We just wanted to say thank you. You're our first show after we just went to the Webbies. Yeah. So that was a big thing.

So we're like super red carpet famous now. No, so we walked our first red carpet. Oh, it was a mess. And we were horrible at it. Horrible. We were walking around and they were like, okay, look over here. And we'd both like it. Horrible. We were walking around and they were like, OK, look over here. And we'd both look in opposite directions.

And they kept going, you have to look at the same camera. And I'm like, I have never been yelled at by a photographer. Apparently, if you don't look at the same camera, your picture doesn't end up on Google Images. So there are no pictures of us on Google Images. But our guests are on Google Images because they were looking at the camera. That's nice. My mom is obsessed at the camera. So that's nice.

My mom is obsessed with Michael Douglas. So is my mother. So is every mother, maybe? I don't know. They were, I guess, fighting over him and then realized he was sitting eight feet away from us. So then my mom was like, I'll play it cool tonight. I'll play it cool.

And then I caught her trying to bump bows with Michael Douglas' children and be like, oh, I didn't know you were his children. Oh, let me just sit next to you. Poor Tom was just still at the table. Like, well, I guess I'll sit with you guys. So anyway, thank you for having us after that. And then we go home and then we're

going to start recording episodes that don't sound like shitty audio, just so you know. We literally recorded an hour before we got here. Yeah yeah so this week coming up is gonna be more shitty sorry we're in our separate hotel rooms yeah seven feet away it was our first long distance recording but it was really long distance we were on the same floor and only like ten feet away from each other but somebody here saw us at our hotel who are you don't No, don't say, oh shit. There you are. Don't follow them to their hotel.

What are you going to say to our hotel? Oh yeah, don't tell anyone what hotel we're, oh shit. I do this every time. We're staying at the, what's the, what's the real fancy one? I don't know what you're about to say. What's the fancy one? The Four Seasons. The Four Seasons, yes.

The penthouse suite. There was one time where Christine just like rampantly told everyone where we were staying. I was like, we got to the Holiday Inn and everyone was like, oh. And then halfway through she was like, the West Inn, just kidding. And it's like, like you didn't get absolutely caught. Anyway, before we get started,

we do have a drinking game if anyone is willing and able to play with us. I am willing and or able, so let's go. Sounds like they know what alcohol is, so I think they're gonna have a good time. So, basically, I made the rules. So it's drink whenever Christine does anything. Well...

That's the, like, our veiled attempt at basically saying drink until we're funny. That's the main... We used to try to hide our motives but not anymore. That's like the end game hashtag Avengers but... Stop doing that! But so drink until we're funny or if you're like a rules person drink if Christine says listen. It's extremely rare so you won't have to worry about that one bit. And then drink if Christine gasps. Also very unlikely.

Very unlikely. So at this point you're in a good zone. Well. If not inebriated. And then drink if Christine goes shh shh shh shh shh shh. Yeah, I do do that one quite often, so I apologize in advance. However, I made my own rule, and that is that you have to drink every time Em says fun fact, which is a lot.

And often never fun. No. Literally never fun. Usually makes you hate yourself for hearing it. But I had to read it on Wikipedia, so you have to listen to me it. So. But we allow you to drink about it so that's okay. Drink if we talk about the sweet baboo little baby Gio. 48 hours counting down. And and then drink if we tell Eva what to do. Which has already happened a hundred times today. There's this drink here called like a cougar catcher, some shit.

Cougar bait. Which is what they call me. I just hate that. OK. So I wanted to try it, because why not? And then I drank it way too fast. And then I was like, Eva, will you order me another one? And she's like, what's it called?

And I was like, cougar bait. And you have to go. I think you just wanted her to have to go ask someone for a cougar bait. Poor thing. She, I think, is so excited to never see our faces again after the next couple of days. We, in the last, how long have we been touring now?

Four months? We have asked her to do precisely 1,000 ridiculous things. Precisely. She is very excited to take a breath, but can we all also please give her a round of applause for being so awesome. At our penultimate show.

At our penultimate show. So I guess that's it for the drinking. Oh, there are bonus rounds for the drinking game. I don't love the bonus rounds. Drink twice if we talk about my arch nemesis, Lemon. Well, we've done that. So drink up. If you're not caught up with the episodes,

because there are a few people who aren't. And they've reached out to us, and they, I guess, pick up halfway through. And they're like, oh, who's Lemon? Is that a new dog or a new cat? And I have to tell them it's a new lemon that it's a new fucking lemon. Well he was lonely okay we'll get into it later. And then drink twice if I go honestly it's just funny. I'm not saying I'm mad I just think it's funny how that happened.

You have family here, please stop. Allison loves when I do that to her by the way. No, she doesn't. No, literally nobody does. Actually Christine genuinely hates it. I do. So behind closed doors in our friendship, if I ever go, honestly, it's just funny. She goes, honestly, shut the fuck up.

And guess what, you never do, so I don't even. I've woven it into our career, so you're stuck with me. I don't know why I try. That being said, order your Ubers now, because hopefully you get nice and tipsy. Yeah, make your own rules up. We just do it as we go along. And until then, I guess let's crack into it?

Yes. Woo! Woo! All right. Good, good, let's crack into it. Yes. Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! All right. Good, good, good. Uh-oh. Uh-oh.

Oh, here they are. Oh my god. I was keeping them in a safe place. That would have been fun if you had to make up a whole story from memory. That would have been fun. So because we are nearing the end, I have a little bit of senioritis and that like I've done this a lot of times now making notes and usually what I do is I try to condense them down so they're a little shorter but I didn't do that so you're getting a

longer story. You're the only person with senioritis who does more work. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's fine, it's funny. So, it's literally not. So, here's a good thing and a bad thing about Albany. You ready? Hang in there. Hang in there. Hey, watch what you say. Whatever you say, I'm not a part of it. So, the good thing is that you guys have a lot of ghosts. Okay?

Oh! The bad thing is that all the ghost stories are kind of short, so they didn't make one Long story so then it goes back to another good thing and you get two stories. Oh Six people were excited about that good. Thank you. Maybe by the end seven so This is the story of the oh by the way, whether or not you know it, clap, because I have anxiety. So. Yeah, and keep that going through the whole show,

thank you. Keep that going until we're in Long Island tomorrow. Yeah, like far, far away. This is the story of the New York State Capitol. Oh. Oh. You should know what that is, but. I don't think that was a pity clap,

however, I need you to do that again when I say my story. Just saying. Don't forget. We'll know if it sounds like a golf clap. That's cute. Good luck. Interesting. So, it is the seat of the New York State government on State Street and part of the Empire State

Complex. Ooh. Ah. That's right. They actually did it. I know. 50 cities. You're the first people to actually do it all without me telling you what to do. However we were in Wisconsin and all these people were like, ooh. That was incredible. The Midwest was very nice to us. At one point I asked their opinion and people raised their hands yeah and he's like oh who here and they silently so good apparently the price of it I

accidentally erased that note so so you made it super long and then erase the erase the important thing cool so whatever the original price was when it was built is the equivalent to in today's money it cost $753 million to make. So 42.97 million. So like a nickel. So it's considered the most expensive government building of its time. It is on the National Register of Historic Places and it's a national historic landmark as of the 1970s.

It was built in 1899, designed by five architects and it took over 32 years to build. Oh, it was $25 million in the 1800s. I was close, not really. You were close with the nickel though. Yeah, basically the same thing. It is one out of 65 properties on the Haunted History Trail of New York. That's fun. Okay. There's a trail

There's a whole trail. Okay, I can get down with the trail. It is The building is five stories plus a basement in an attic The walls are they start at four feet thick and end at 16 feet thick and it's foundation That scares me a little bit. It's a big boy. So, body positivity, that's fine. You can be 16 feet thick. That's fine.

Hell yeah. It also has a vaulted ceilings and 23 karat gold leaves on the walls. Shit. Sounds like my room. Yeah. Sounds like the podcast studio for sure. Gold leaf plunger fort.

Right, right, right. Wow, we haven't talked about the plunger in a long time. Oh. Oh. Everyone who doesn't know what that is, sorry. You'll learn about it another time. It's because we eventually had to use the plunger and then it no longer.

We didn't reuse it as a fort. No. It kind of. Once it was property of the toilet, we never touched it again. It lost its magic a little bit. Once it was property of the toilet, we never touched it again. It lost its magic a little bit. 23 carat leaves on the walls, marble from Italy, granite from Scotland, and onyx from

Mexico. Jesus. It has an assembly chamber and three staircases with skylights. Ooh. Thank you. Oh, oh. Thanks, guys. I feel affirmed now.

The central staircase is called the Great Western Staircase, and it has 444 steps, and it is 120 feet tall. Oh my goodness. I just thought of all the steps I'd have to climb. I know. Never take me there. No. It's like a stair master.

It's on the trail, the haunted trail. It cost a million. Just the staircase alone cost a million dollars, and it took 14 years of work to complete what the hell It's a staircase Obviously nicknamed the million dollar staircase. Oh god throughout the staircase like a TLC show it does like million dollar matchmakers staircase Throughout the staircase our corridors and pillars made of intricately carved sandstone and it took over 500 sandstone carvers to design the entire area by

carving in famous people's faces including ours. Yeah stupid joke. That we both made. It was a throwaway. It was a throwaway. 500s, how do you find 500 specific sandstone carvers? I don't know. In Albany, New York. No offense, but that just seems like a very specific job title. I don't know, well they all, so actually, kind of to answer your question,

they all came from Scotland and Italy. Oh. So. We never actually get answers, so that makes me happy. So someone went to Italy and was like, all aboard, and like 500 people. All aboard to Albany, yeah. Let's go. All, I'll be, no, no. get answers. So that means someone went to Italy and was like all aboard and like 500 people. All aboard to Albany. Yeah. Let's go. All I'll be. No, no. So we'll workshop it.

Eva, figure that out for later. Edit this out, Eva. So more than 500 carvers were told to design the area and put famous faces on the walls. They had up to 77 recognizable faces including Ulysses S. Grant and Abraham Lincoln. Wait I like that there are 500 famous people but only 77 were recognizable. Right. Some people didn't really know like they weren't good at faces I guess. There's a lot of weird smiley faces carved in there. The rest, so probably the other several hundred faces, are known as the capitals unknown. Wait, that's very nope, unsettling. I don't like that. They just have not been recognized apparently. Sad. Most of the stone carvers, like I said, are from Scotland, UK and Italy and also as a reward for doing this project they also got

to carve in a memory of theirs or a face of someone they loved. Oh that's nice. So that's a lot of the capitals unknown because a lot of them are family members of the carvers. Aww. Yeah, precious. Precious. A little creepy. It's probably the last precious thing you'll hear when I'm talking about ghosts.

I don't make it much better, so don't get excited. So one unknown carver, they never figured out who it was. The face that he chose to carve into the sandstone leaf was the face of the devil. Speaking of senior artists, that'd be a good prank, like senior. Yeah, like I'm out of prank. Like senior prank. Yeah. Like, I'm out of here. Back to Italy. Back on the boat.

So they, apparently it's really hard to find it first, but if you're looking hard enough, you can find it. We'll find it. And well, hang on. There's a quote from the tour guide that says, the story goes, if you can find this demon on your own without help from another, you are yourself the devil. Yeah. We're fucked. Yeah. demon on your own without help from another you are yourself the devil yeah we're fucked yeah as well if it is on top of the staircase we might never find

it right oh that's for sure until they build an elevator I'll never see the ceiling depends on where it's located right right right and unless I've got like my joggers on fuck okay it's rumored that whoever carved the devil into the building also placed a curse on the building. Oh, that's not nice. So that's the beginning of the dark stuff. So let's move on to death. Okay. Hooray! Yee-haw! So in 1878, a worker fell from scaffolding while plastering the ceilings in the state assembly room. He fell on a Saturday night and he was found on a Monday morning.

Oh. Still alive. What? Oh no. He died on Wednesday. So. That's terrible. Survived for another two days after he was found.

Holy shit. Yeah. But apparently he fell from like the fourth floor and everything and there's like marble so... Eww. Anyway. So, do you like how I try to make this funny but I just skip past it just to rip it off like a band-aid?

So, in 1879, a year later, there was an artist named William Morris Hunt and he painted two murals for the assembly chapter on the actual walls themselves and they were 40 feet murals. So also big boys. And due to structural damage in the building, the ceiling had to be changed and so the murals got covered up. So all of his hard work went, was for nothing. Oh no. And then there was a fire in 1911 that damaged the rest of his paintings, and they could

not be salvaged. So all the art he's ever done in there was totally gone. Apparently he was distraught about this and died by suicide. Oh no. Fun fact. Did we tell you or did we tell you? His tombstone is carved to look like a tree stump. What the fuck?

Your aunt thinks that's really funny. I knew you and I were one in the same here. Apparently it looks like a tree stump because it's supposed to mean that his life was cut short. Well, okay. Yeah, how do you feel now? You really ruined the fun times we were all having together. Oh, yeah, yeah. So in 1890, there was a fruit vendor that worked across. OK.

I think it's funny, too. OK. I mean, that is like the most lighthearted thing you're going to hear. So you got to laugh when you can. Yeah. You got to really force it. Right.

So a fruit vendor, ha ha ha, was having financial problems, ran into the building and jumped off the fourth floor. Oh my. But aren't you glad you laughed about the fruit vendor? Orange, you glad I'm? Oh. Get out, please. This is show 41, I'm ready to finally finally punch you on stage.

Woo! Finally, finally. Everyone knows. So in 1911, the same fire I was talking about earlier was potentially caused by electrical wiring but a lot of people don't believe that because apparently it happened spontaneously on an office desk by itself. So what they don't know what caused the fire. There was a fire all of a sudden. But they're calling it electrical wiring so that they have a cause. But there's no proof of that. So during that same fire, there was a night guard named Sam. Sam was 78. And Sam was 78 and Sam was the only person to die in the fire. Oh. He died of smoke inhalation. Oh no.

And he was, we're nervous laughing. That's what's happening here. It happens a lot. He was the only person to die, but he was so badly involved in the fire that he was only identified by his wristwatch. What the fuck? He was seen right before in the building flinging windows open and attempting to save the rare records from the fire. What the fuck? So he stayed behind trying to save all of

the documents. No. Because of this the governor has deemed Sam the most dedicated watchman in New York and they gave him a plaque that's still in the building. I hope he's a happy ghost if he shows up again. You'll find out. I mean I always try to guess who's gonna come back. I don't like talking about death but something has to happen for people to turn into ghosts. So that's how, that's why this whole suction happens. Circle of life. So there's a bonus dead body in here.

You're welcome. What could that mean? I'll tell you. So after Ulysses S. Grant died, he did not die on the property or anything like that but apparently he had some ties to this building and his body was displayed there for 24 hours. That's cool. What the fuck? In 1885 he was on display in the building for one day and there was an estimated 50,000 people who came to see his body. What a weird thing. Okay. Fun fact. Fun fact. All right.

So in 2003, the building started hosting haunted tours, which are free to the public and on Halloween. Nice. And the education coordinator and the main tour guide, his name, I shit you not, is Stuart Lemon. Drake. The person who will shit you not is Stuart Lemon. Drink. What if... hold on. What if...

What? What if I had gone into Wikipedia and like changed it before? Shit. The fact that you said it makes it now seem less likely, but had I not known, I would have believed it if I heard it from someone else. Damn. Also, actually, this is very slick move on your end,

because I didn't know that it... I was just reading the name and not paying attention, because it's L-E-H-M-A-N. Oh. So then I had to read it out loud and I was like that is Lemon. So that's that was if you did this job well done you caught me. You're well it's all for the drinking game. Well Stuart Lemon is the main tour guide and he gets really invested in the tour. He dresses in 19th century clothing all the way down to the spectacles and pocket watch

Is he like supposed to or he just does that I think he just does it okay good. I Just wanted to make sure But I bet that tour is pretty bitchin. I mean if he's like, oh hell yeah, he's committed He's like volunteering to overdress so, you know his stories are gonna be good. He's like on eBay buying the right like leather. He's like, I need the perfect bowler hat, yes. So there are possibly more ghosts on the property, but because it's a state government building,

investigation groups are not allowed to stay overnight and they're not allowed to reveal what they've seen. Wow. That sounds a little conspiracy-like to me, but. I don't love that. So it was hard to find a lot of ghost stuff because it's hard to, basically I only got information from tour guides

that were willing to talk. So. Jesus, okay. So I will now try to tell you, as much detail as possible about the ghosts. And I got most of it from tour guides, but there was one article that I really appreciated called What's That Draft? Could it be a g-g-g-g-ghost? Oh, right. I also wrote that last night.

I forgot. I remember reading the title and being like, even if this provides no information for me, I'm going to say that on stage. So here are the ghosts. It sounds like the title of a Scooby-Doo episode. It does. Who's the one?

I guess none of them have a stutter, do they? Go, go, go, go, go, ghost? Yeah, Shaggy. Shaggy. Shaggy. All right, well that is a perfect fit then, isn't it? I said it, I don't know if it's true, but I have a microphone, so.

I just. Sorry. I, I, whatever. I'm about to go onto a Scooby-Doo tangent. We've done that before, we don't need to do that right now. We have. Um, and at the end of our interview, we did a Scooby-Doo trivia game and I kicked Christine's ass. Yeah, but because they, I didn't cheat and read all the Scooby-Doo trivia on the internet before the interview. No, I came prepared to an interview is what I did. Well, I came

unprepared, so welcome to our show. Okay. So there are hauntings that have been published. And hauntings on this property have been published in a whole lot of Albany or New York haunted house books. It's supposedly one of the more haunted places. In the 1911 fire, like I said, a lot of documents were destroyed that Sam wasn't able to save. The number is somewhere over 500,000 books.

What? And 270,000 original early American documents were all destroyed in the fire. Oh no. In the same space, however, were archives of several irreplaceable sacred native artifacts. Oh no. And there are beliefs that there are some native people,

I guess, guarding their own property in the building because even though everything around it caught on fire and got destroyed, none of their stuff was touched. What? There's a quote saying, "'Not a single object sacred to their religion "'or to their mystery cults was spoiled by the fire. Even the hair on the wonderful medicine mask was unsinged.

Wow. So cool. Fun fact. So there's another quote that says, everyone knows that there's something here. We had a guy who would never go to the fifth floor for the fire inspections because he swore there was a ghost up there and everyone called him George. Okay? The guy or the ghost? Apparent? I don't know.

Oh. I'm guessing- I'm serious. I'm guessing the ghost but at the same time all the people I've listened no one's named George. Like can't you just guess with a name that we have on file? Stuart Lemon. Mr. Lemon. So many people have reported seeing a dark shadow fall to the floor and nobody's there. Oh god. People have seen a shadow man fall or jump off of

the stairs on the top floor and they've also heard sounds of heavy heavy breathing and crying. People see things run past them in the corner of their eyes and they have picked up a digital recording of a voice that was not there of a guy saying, William Morris is behind the door. Oh, what a weirdly specific quote. No, I wonder if William Morris is talking about himself in the third person. I got like his ghost wingman to like let them know. He wants you to know.

My friend over there wants me to tell you that he likes you. He's behind the door. He thinks you to know. My friend over there wants me to tell you that he likes you. He's behind the door. He thinks you're cute. So apparently there's a gray, blurry figure that has passed through the corridor and has moved so fast that it has knocked women off their feet. Only women? Only women. Okay.

Apparently, it ran through a guy, so a guy walking down the hall. This blurry thing went through him as he was running down the corridor. He's too tough to fall over, though. Right. Got it. And if you experience this blurry figure,

it leaves you feeling ice cold. There's an apparition that has sped down the hallway so fast that women's skirts have flown up Interesting trend I see going on here. It's like the Marilyn Monroe like on the great thing, but like yeah, it's not a great It's just a ghost flying by you and also you're probably falling also. So hey, and you're not Marilyn Monroe. Yeah It's a little less exciting Less cute people have said that they have seen or taken pictures of the carved faces and only the eyes glow. Oh, cool.

Mediums have reported meeting Sam and they say that he's very friendly and likes the mediums talking to him. That's nice. Apparently, they've asked like, what do you have to do after a hundred years? And he's like, just working. So he's like, wait, does So he's like, still does his little duties and. I love Sam. Apparently if you encounter him, he's just working

and he doesn't mean to bother you. Which is precious. I love that. There is. Don't laugh at me. Look, wouldn't you rather have a ghost that's like disciplined and responsible and doing his job instead of like possessing you like

Like lifting your skirt up and pushing you over. That's definitely not Sam. That is unethical. Sam's just a patrolling for those guys. Right, right, right. So there's a quote of a tour guide saying, We did get several really amazing orb pictures off of the balcony and by the staircase. Oh, this isn't a tour guide. This is a tour guest. Our small granddaughter was with us. And every time we go by there now,

she tells us about the time that she met the people that were there. According to her description, she probably met Sam. But nobody was with them on the tour. And she just keeps talking about all the people she met. Oh, dear. Hopefully it met Sam. Aw. But nobody was with them on the tour. And she just keeps talking about all the people she met. Oh dear. Hopefully it was Sam. That's troubling.

There's apparently the ghost of Abraham Lincoln. Listen, everyone thinks they have the ghost of Abraham Lincoln. I've covered like 60 stories where Lincoln is somehow involved. That guy is going places. Ulysses S. Grant was the one who was actually there. He's a globetrotter. He's busy. He only shows up once as a dead body. He did his time. Okay. But Lincoln apparently shows up on his anniversary of his death all the time. He just like wants to get out of DC on that day.

Okay, fair. I mean his body was taken by train to his resting place. But on the way, apparently the train made a stop at this building. And so workers think that this was like the last couple minutes where his like spirit and his body were still connected. So he when they pass through, he might have still kind of been with us. So they say that on the anniversary of his death, workers on that train line very often get haunted in the building, and there are reports of an apparition of a train car that can be seen speeding down Albany, just flying down. I tell you what, we were on a train today to Albany

We were it was not an apparition and it wasn't speeding down haphazardly down your city Oh, it was speeding haphazardly and I got very motion sick, but it's all okay Well, apparently people see this train car and as it's speeding towards the building it vanishes Or toward the building. Oh, yeah ours did not know ours When it's a clear when approaching apparently this I don't understand and I feel like it deserved a lot more explanation and I'm surprised Google did not offer that to me. You see the black train car speeding toward Albany and then vanishing and when approaching, it has quote of blue skeletons in the sky. What? What?

It sounds like a lucid dream. Yeah. Sounds like a fever dream. If you see a blue skeleton, it means it's Lincoln died on this day. It's a poor anniversary. We've been warned. Or like, Em and I are on the train coming to town for a show. Right.

I don't know we have yeah Yeah, I'm just gonna let it stop there So the that's the end of that story, but I do have a quick one that I wanted to share with you this one is closer to Lake George and it's Which is like one of my favorite places in the world by the way Which is like one of my favorite places in the world by the way. Em says that about every city we go to. No, I'm just kidding. That's not true. I grew up going to Lake George every summer and my parents were like kids on the campground together.

Yeah. Your parents did what? So my dad separately. You said they would kiss at the campground? What? Well I'm sure with- You said they would kiss at the campground? What? Well I'm sure my parents- They were kids. They were kids. Oh. Oh boy. Okay.

I was like, knowing Linda, I don't know what she was doing. She, when she was a little girl, she used to go to the campgrounds and when my dad was little, he would go to the campgrounds. So they're, even they are not sure that maybe there's a chance they were crossing paths. Cute. And then when my mom first- mom their divorce now, so don't Like three marriages ago, so don't it's old news. There's no no harm no foul But when they were when they were very in love like a thousand years ago when they when my mom was first

Meeting my dad's family. They were building their own lake house on the lake So then I grew up in the house that my mom and my dad built together with my dad's family, they were building their own lake house on the lake. So then I grew up in the house that my mom and my dad built together with my dad's family. So I'm, you know, but they love other people now. So, but no, I'm like, I love Lake Georgia. I have all these memories of Saratoga and Ticonderoga and the Adirondacks and all that. So me too. Okay, moving on. So the story I'm covering is Fort William Henry. It is in the top five things to do in Lake George and four out of five stars on TripAdvisor.

Okay, decent. All right. It's also been featured on Ghost Hunters on the Sci-Fi Network, which my dad lovingly calls SIFI. So. Perfect. Full circle. So super quick history. During the French-Indian War, Fort William Henry was destroyed, and the current one is a replica that was built in the 1950s. I'm sorry. Many people were soldiers that were wounded and staying in it when it was a field hospital and they all ended up dying when soldiers came in and scalped and disemboweled them. Moving on along. So reports say that anywhere between 200 and

a cool 1500 people were killed there. Oh. Depending on if you include their wives and children, which I do. Well, unless you think they're not worth it. But probably around 1,500 people. Yuck. So then I'm just going straight into the ghosts. So there is the spirit of a Native American chief named, oh, I should've practiced this. Here we go.

Talcolexus, okay? That sounds not right, but. Well, so he was a Native American chief on the property. He was hanged at one point before the building was even, had even finished. So he's been there longer than the building has. Apparently he stays by the tree he was hanged on. Oh dear.

But he appears as a bright white glow to people who don't feel safe. Aw, he's like Sam's friend. People also see patrolling soldiers he was hanged on. Oh dear. But he appears as a bright white glow to people who don't feel safe. Aww. He's like Sans friend. People also see patrolling soldiers walking the halls. They hear heavy boot steps. They hear knocks, coughing, and laughter. They see an apparition of a wounded soldier moaning in pain and then fading away in front

of your very eyes. Uh oh. People have experienced flashing lights, streaks of color, orbs in pictures, and orbs that just fly all over you. People have also seen shadows circling around people. Nah. There is one ghost apparently named Limper, because he was, one of his legs was amputated.

Oh. Well, that's kind of rude. I didn't choose that name. That was a real thing. I didn't either, by of rude. I didn't choose that name. That was a real thing. I didn't either, by the way. I didn't go on there and do that. Apparently in the 1950s, they dug up a body that didn't have one of his legs.

And they assume that that must also be the ghost that has uneven footsteps. So they call him Limper. Oh my god. OK. OK. Moving on. Moving on. There's also Slammer, who is a ghost that slams doors and people's faces. We were all Slammer when we were 13. Yeah.

Very original. There are spirits of officers that get mad at guides for disturbing their area. Apparently people feel tugged, pushed, and they even hear voices saying, please go away. Oh, which also is at 13. You are more polite than me at 13. Probably. I was a much meaner. Sorry, mom. I was a German child. Oh, right. Okay. There are also voices telling guards to leave the powder magazine whenever they would try to pick up something

from the area and bring it with them. They'll, like, say, leave the... Next. Is that a weapon? The powder magazine was in a certain instance where someone picked it up. Is that, like, a weapon thing? For, like, a gun?

Okay. I was a German child, I'm telling you. I don't know these things. Okay. I'm from Virginia I know I know that's why I'm very subtly asking Into the microphone in a stage whisper. Yeah So in the area where they store the gunpowder that's for guns, too. Oh I always wondered There's apparently quote a soldier who used to stand watch and still thinks that he's guarding the place.

Oh, my. So apparently, he is more of an intelligent spirit that reacts pretty quickly if you say anything to provoke him. So he just stands there guarding the place all the time. And a tour guide screamed down the hall saying, I think somebody's going to light a match down here. then seconds later you heard what sounds like a gunshot. Uh oh. What else? Let's see how else can I impress you? We're trying. Oh this one's good this one's good hang in there hang in there. Okay there's a apparently a

guest on a tour was military and said I am a Lance Corporal of the US Marine Corps and I have seen what you've seen and I understand what you're going through. Oh my God. And then that was the time that they ever, that was the most active EVPs they ever caught of digital recordings of soldiers either saying hi or sounding kind of like their last moments in life.

They sounded a little in pain. But it definitely stirred some activity. There was one time a medium who spoke with a man by the name of Richardson. And then they went back and confirmed in the records that a man named Richardson had died on the spot that she was standing when she talked to him. There's a quote from someone saying,

there was a tremendous massacre here. So obviously there's going to be lots and lots of spirits that died a horrible death, but it is definitely highly haunted. In 1957, it was filled with thousands of people apparently during the French and Indian War, so if hundreds of those people died, it's probably incredibly haunted.

Just taking a look at it. According to our estimate. According like very, very basic assumptions. There's another quote saying, at the time, oh this is a different experience with the ghost, at the time I was looking down and I heard somebody say, nice hat. That's nice. And I said, well thank you, I just got it recently.

And this is the first time I wore it. And then he brought his hat up and nobody was around him. Thank you. I just got it recently and this is the first time I wore it." And then he brought his head up and nobody was around him. Oh, he really thought someone was... He thought somebody really was complimenting his hat. I mean, I guess they were. And then left because he was like, I don't need any, I don't need to know the whole backstory. There's another quote.

We actually do believe we have a spirit attached to a fireplace that we call Mary. People have come down the stairs right behind us by the fireplace and they tell us they get a whisper in their ear of a woman saying, hurry up, hurry up, hurry up. Oh God, okay. And people standing in this doorway right behind us say that they get a little shove like someone is telling them to get out of the way. Oh God.

Interesting. Interesting. Interesting. Another quote is, we actually stopped the tour because we had so much activity going on. One of the girls had orbs flying all around her and she kept saying that she had things flying all around her face. And then a little boy kept pointing out shadow figures all over the place and we actually had an orb appear in front of us. And we all saw it and I actually got it to come over and

land in my hand. Like a butterfly? That's weird. Yeah, like a little butter orb. Trademark TM TM TM. Eva put that somewhere important. Someone put an orb on a shirt but with wings. That is called a snitch. Nailed it. You're welcome. We're millennials. Okay. Stupid.

Stupid. The last quote is one of my first encounters was with a spirit there that we call Shadow Man. Yeah, no. When I saw it, I didn't think much of it. I just thought it was a person who came down here to say hey. But then there was no one around, and it slinked away from me. And then someone said, they asked the main tour guide

what he thought. And he said, as long as you're respectful, nothing's going to follow you home so those are the two stories I the New York State Capitol and Fort William Henry I'm going to entertain for another second because I want to pour my wine. Pour faster because I'm blacking out. That was hilarious. Okay. Hello, everybody.

I have a murder story for you. Hooray. Everyone who is dragged here is like mmm. They're really saying halfway there halfway there. You are very close don't worry. Your story was kind of dark in some places. Thank you. Yeah. Usually mine are really light and boring. Yeah. No this one was dark mine's worse so sorry. This is the story, Albany, of Christopher Porco. They know, someone high-fived about it. I don't think I've had a high-five about a story.

I mean, okay, great. I didn't know if you guys would know it. Sometimes I get really excited about things and say them and everyone just kind of, oh wait, was that a pity clap? Hold on. Shit, I forgot I told them to do that. Okay, we wait, was that a pity clap? Hold on. Shit. I forgot I told them to do that. Okay. We're going to pretend like you really are excited. Okay. So I do want to say that I watched an episode on CBS of 48 Hours Mystery and that's where

I got a lot of this information. So nobody's allowed to sue me. Thank you. Oh, real quick. So you don't sue me. If you want to know where my sources came from, it's all the first three pages of Google. When I typed in Albany haunted. Yeah. If you type Albany haunted and Albany murder. Yeah. That's pretty much it. Please don't sue us. Everything's alleged. Alleged. Good idea. We should have just called this tour allegedly. Allegedly. Just hashtag don't sue us.

2020, allegedly. OK. Here we go. So Peter Portgo, 52-year-old lawyer for a prominent judge, and his wife Joan, a children's speech pathologist at a local school district, live in Bethlehem, New York. That's close, right, I believe? OK.

I did a Google Map thing. It was like, do you want an Uber there? And I was like, no, thanks. But it seemed to be rather close. So Bethlehem, New York. They have two grown sons. By the way, we're in 2004. Sorry.

I forgot to tell you it's 50 years ago Good to know 15 years ago. Oh my god. Is that right? I'm not good. That's right I just forgot how time flies by I said it and then like held my breath cuz I was like someone's gonna correct me When we record at home, nobody's there to yell at me that I'm wrong. So I'm there. I just don't I just Don't know any better. No, I just agree blindly. I'm don't know any better. We don't know math. No, I just agree blindly. I'm like, you're right. We don't know shapes or math or basic anything. Yeah. For people who, like, don't actively listen to the show, I did not know what a rhombus was.

I called it a slanty boy, so I don't think that's... I don't think that's much better. Most of our... If you listen to, like, our walk walk-on song half of it is saying things stupid wrong like Fun fact he was a wanton. That's Thinking wanton and wanton were the same thing and I was like, I guess he's a wanton or segue is pronounced Sagu I'm sorry. I have a master's degree, just so everyone... Nobody I think believes that. They pitied me. They just gave it to me out of pity.

Yeah. Agreed. Same. I mean, for me too. Right. Cool. Anyway, you have to listen to me anyway. Sorry.

Okay. So, we're in 2004. Peter and Joan have two grown sons who don't live with them. There's Jonathan, who's 23. He's a naval officer stationed in South Carolina. And then he has a younger brother named Chris who is 21 and he's a student at the University of Rochester which... Ah! Okay! I always include the names of like places nearby because sometimes my stories are really dark and so there's only a few places you can actually get

excited so... It's also a... it's a gamble because sometimes we get yeah and then I have to talk about how much I hate that University I don't know we went to when we were in Wisconsin we talked about Michigan and they lost their no no no it was Minneapolis Minnesota and Wisconsin something happened where like you know how everyone has that dream where they're like, oh, I'm on stage and everyone's booing me? That happened to us.

Yeah. And they were just like, boo! We were like, ugh, we hate them too. And then we had to say the opposite the next day in Minneapolis, yeah. Yeah. We were like, we love you! We hate Wisconsin.

It's exhausting. Anyway, so University of Rochester, I hear it's lovely. Three and a half hours south-ish of here, I believe. Or east. West. I also don't know cardinal directions. English is not my first language. I'm so sorry.

I'm so sorry. Okay, west. I, yes, I need that sort of. Okay, late November 2004. Now things stop laughing because it's not funny anymore. It gets very sad. Okay, late November 2004, someone entered the Portco residence sometime after 2 a.m. They disabled the alarm system, went to the garage and found an axe. Oh boy. Oh boy. Oh boy. They went upstairs to the master bedroom

where Joan and Peter were sleeping and attacked both Peter and Joan with the axe, striking them in the face and head dozens of times. They then left the axe at the foot of the bed, went outside and cut the phone lines before fleeing into the night. What the killer did not realize, however, is that Peter was still alive.

Ooh. Uh-oh. At some point that night, he regained consciousness and they believe he was in such profound shock that he just started going about his normal routine despite like massive head injury and. Wait, I think I've heard of this. I had heard of it too.

I think I'd seen it on like forensic files or something. It's one of those things where you just don't unrip you don't forget it, right? It's a very shocking story like you I mean you're gonna tell me I'm just I'll tell you but okay But yeah, you're probably right. Okay Finally actually we're probably both wrong two years into the show. Oh, yeah, that sounds better So at some point in the night he regained consciousness. He started going about his normal morning routine. He was trailing. The reason they know this is because he was trailing massive amounts of blood. Yeah, they could follow like his path throughout the house. He used the bathroom, then he went downstairs and began to unload the dishwasher.

It's believed he was in such profound shock that he had not processed what had happened and just kind of thought, you know, it was a normal morning and went about his day. And didn't see the blood he was leaving everywhere. Just was so disoriented and in shock that it apparently didn't occur to him. So at one point, so he unloves the dishwasher, then he packs his own lunch for the day for work. Like they found his lunch box on the counter. Did he go to work? So can you imagine all those coworkers?

Can you imagine you're like on the freeway and you're like wait oh. Oh my god. Oh no. No he did not go to work. So he packed his own lunch then at one point he even opens the front door and pokes his head out to look around. And they know this because there's blood on the concrete, his blood on the concrete porch out front.

So at some point, he had opened the front door and looked around. And then at some point, after wandering around seemingly aimlessly throughout the first floor, Peter collapses at the base of the stairs and passes away. So Peter did not arrive for work the next morning and no one could get a hold of him so his co-workers felt like something might be wrong so they called the police and when detectives arrived at the scene they

found Peter at the bottom of stairs where he had died a few hours earlier. So there's this Bethlehem Police crime scene detective named Christopher Bowdish and he was interviewed on this 48 hours episode so I reference him a lot apologies in advance should have changed his name to lemon but I didn't think of that so oops okay so Bowdish is at the house and his officers are going through it to clear it make sure that the killer was not still in the house and one of his officers calls out to him from upstairs he says there is another victim up here and she is still alive. Oh no. It's I didn't know that part. I gotcha. Yes you did. I don't usually drink during my own

stories but wow okay. That called for it. Okay. So, Detective Bowdish enters the master bedroom to see Joan Porco laying crosswise across the bed. She's gesturing over to him, like she can manage to gesture to him to come toward her, which is very surprising. It's been several hours since she's been attacked. The ax wounds on her face were so bad that she couldn't speak but as they waited on medics knowing she could die

at any minute he decided to quickly ask her a few questions to try and get as much information as possible. Sure. You've got two minutes to get up. Why not? I guess. Yeah smart. My brain wouldn't have gone that far but very smart. So when Joan was asked whether she could hear him and understand him, she nodded yes. So he knew she could understand and communicate that way. So quick side note, in a strange coincidence, Bouddha should actually met Joan and Peter two years before,

when they had reported their laptops stolen, like someone had broken in and stolen their laptops. And it was then that he learned about their family and the people that they knew. And so today, he had noticed when the detectives came to the scene that it didn't look like a break-in. There was actually a spare house key still in the front door. So nobody had broken in.

Nothing in the house had been taken. So he kind of considered maybe it was an inside job, somebody she knew. So he asked Joan if she knew the killer and she nodded yes. When asked if it was a family member, she nodded yes again. When asked did Jonathan do this to you, her oldest son, she shook her head no aggressively. And when asked did Christopher do this to you, she nodded yes. Ooh, all right well case closed. The end no. So she was rushed to the hospital and meanwhile authorities began to look

for Christopher. When he hears about the attack he rushes back home oh sorry he was more than 200 miles away University of Rochester lovely place. He's still there in his dorm room and he hadn't heard about the attack. Apparently he heard from a reporter who called him and said like, so what do you think about your parents murder? And he was like, what? Oh my gosh, that's the worst way. Yeah. Okay.

So he rushes back home to be with his mom who's taken into emergency surgery and then he is taken to the police station where he's questioned for six hours. So at this point obviously Detective Bowdich is like, Chris did it for obvious reasons. Chris claims he was in the lounge of his dorm building the whole night, having fallen asleep on the couch, and that he never once left campus that night. So detectives head down there to co- down, not down, where is it? West? West, there. They head left there. I don't know.

They head there to question the other students who live in the building to see if anyone had spotted him or could verify his alibi. But unfortunately for Chris, he's in a fraternity, and he lives on the same floor as a bunch of his frat brothers. And, oh, excuse me. Yeah, we get it. You're the bride. Sorry, I'm married and sometimes my ring goes all over.

Em hates it. Okay. So he lived with some of his frat brothers and they actually said they had stayed up till 3.30 in the morning in the lounge and told police that no, like, Chris was not in there. We would have seen him because it's a small lounge and he's like, if he was sleeping on the couch, we would have seen him. So detectives search his room and his car and Chris's car is this bright yellow Jeep Wrangler

with huge tires. It's this aggressive frat bro car. It's a wild car. So they search his car and his dorm room. They don't find anything. And at this point, police are still convinced Chris had something to do with it, but they're sort of at a wild car. So they search his car and his dorm room. They don't find anything. And at this point, police are still convinced Chris had something to do with it, but they're sort of at a standstill.

They can't, there's nothing they've figured out that they can kind of pin on him. And that's when they check campus surveillance cameras. So on the surveillance cameras, you can see, they showed it in the episode, you can see a bright yellow Jeep pulling out of the parking lot of the dorm building at 10 30 p.m. At 10 36 the yellow Jeep is spotted off campus heading east west left east right I'm so confused oh he's

west he's heading east, correct. Because he is in, I was just testing you. Okay. You passed. You passed. Congratulations. So he is spotted by another camera heading east at 10 45 p.m. A New York toll collector says he remembers a bright yellow jeep with giant tires going through his lane And at 1 51 a.m Another toll collector says she also saw a yellow jeep with giant tires speeding through her toll lane in albany only an At an exit only nine miles away from the porco residence So investigators were basically thinking at this point

that Chris drove from the university to his parents' house, where then he used the spare key, which was hidden under a planter out front. Don't do that. Don't do that. And don't do that fake rock shit either. No.

It doesn't look like a rock. No. Home Depot is not fooling anyone with those. Telling you, don't do it. So they think he got the key from Under a Planter, entered the house, and so the alarm, so their like alarm keypad had been smashed. But they believe that he had done that to make it look like somebody had disabled it that way. But the, hold on, I got really excited and I lost my place. Say something funny again.

Found it. God. You're hilarious. Okay. I'm sorry. I do that to Em all the time. It's not fair. Okay.

It's like be funny. And I'm like, ugh. It's like when we're in an Uber and people are like, oh, so what show are you seeing tonight? And we're like, our show. Uh, us. Or they're like, oh, so who's playing tonight? And it's like, us.

Uh. And they're like, oh, you're a comedian. Well, tell us a joke. And I'm like, I don't wanna. We're always like, Eva, tell them a joke. Okay. Um, and she does. She does and then we try to explain our show and we're like it's better if you just keep

driving. Yeah. It's like ghosts and drinking and wine and crime and to be fair they do just usually just stay silent for the rest of the ride. It does shut them up. It does quick very quickly. Like oh we talk about crime on stage and everyone laughs and they're like, okay, well, the next block I'll drop you off. Yeah. They're like, I'm glad you're in my backseat. Anyway, right, so, okay,

so this little keypad was smashed. However, data stored by the alarm company shows that someone had actually deactivated the burglar alarm by entering the master code. So someone knew the code, even though it had been smashed. So it was smashed to kind of look like somebody had not known the code. Got it.

At 4.54 a.m., the phone company record showed that the phone lines had been cut. And then at 5.12 a.m., a yellow Jeep is spotted, reentering the three-way heading west. Imagine if you said that wrong. South! Thank you. You guys, I love you. Wow, you're prouder of me than my own parents are. You can call your mom later and be like, I'm 27 and know what East is. We were in New York the other day and my dad was there for the Webbies and he's like, oh well, it looks like the restaurant's in the southwest and the sun's there.

And I was like, what the fuck? Like I have Google Maps. What Bear Grylls information do you have? It's like, Jesus, you don't. We're going to die so fast in the apocalypse. We're fucked. It's fine. We can't even climb 200 stairs or whatever that place was.

And I won't either. We won't try. We will try. We give up already. Anyway, so cool. It's heading toward campus. And although they can't make out the license plate on the car, which was kind of a point of contention, the car actually had decals on the back that

were like university stickers. I really want to say it was like a Lake George sticker. I don't know if that's true. I made that up. But it would be funny and cool. It probably wasn't. So they showed a bunch of decals on the back and they could match those to his car, basically. And there was also a mud stain on the side of the car that one of the prosecutors in

the episode was like, it's more, so they were like, oh, we matched the mud stain on the video to the mud stain on his car. It's more accurate than a fingerprint match. And I was like, no. I was like, I'm on your side, but no. I beg to differ. I beg to differ a little bit. I'm not a scientist, but.

I don't know where East is, but I beg to differ. So they matched. So they were able to see that at least the stickers matched on the car. On November 4th 2005, so it's been almost a year after the attack, Chris Porco is finally charged with the murder of his father and attempted murder of his mother. When questioned he admits that yes it is his Jeep on the first surveillance video but he says he was just moving it to park off campus for the evening and that's it. And then he went home But then prosecutors actually found a witness. His name was Marshall Gokie and he's a neighbor of the porkos and he says

He was heading to work around 4 a.m When he spotted a familiar yellow Jeep in their driveway and thought huh? looks like Chris's home, so That wasn't good. Things are finally looking good for the prosecution. They're like, I think we got this guy. We know his path. We know the timeline. And then Joan Porco, their star witness, wakes up from her coma.

Oh, yay. A very good news, yes. However, she says no, Chris was not her attacker. And she says she has no recollection of the attack, nor does she remember indicating to police with head nods that her son had anything to do with it, and she swears that he is innocent. So they kind of lost their star player.

Yeah. So a month after Chris's first charge, he's out on bail because she's like, no, Pete didn't do it. And that was kind of the only thing they had going for them. Family and friends rallied to support him. They insisted he was innocent, that he could never do such a thing. His defense team actually was able to find a fingerprint

on the phone box next to the cut phone cord that didn't belong to anyone in the family. And so they kind of pointed to that to say, it was somebody else who had come and attacked the family. And to be fair, all the evidence so far had been circumstantial. So they were kind of hard pressed to find a way to prove that it was him. They also were not able to find one shred of evidence

that Chris was even in the house that night. They didn't find a fingerprint, a footprint, no blood, hair, nothing in his car, in the bright yellow Jeep, in the bedroom or anywhere in the house. And as for the surveillance video Chris's defense basically stuck with the story that oh he was just parking off campus don't worry about it. And then the other yellow Jeep was just another yellow Jeep that someone was driving with big tires. Okay. And basically their story was that by the time he got back to the lounge

his frat brothers had already gone to bed and so when he he fell asleep on the couch, they weren't there anymore, and they had just missed him. So that was the story they went with. As for the alarm keypad, Peter's friends, so the dad, Peter's friends explained that Peter himself had a habit of turning the alarm off to let the dog out at night and then forgetting to turn it back on. So that was kind of their story, is that he had turned it off before going to bed. So it had never been on that night.

Got it, got it. So as for the key in the front door, the spare key that was hidden under a planter, don't do that. As for that, the defense basically said, well, maybe that was Peter, because remember they had found his blood on the front stoop, and they thought,

well, maybe he thought he was locked out, or he to get a paper the paper and had gotten the key out oh my god can you imagine if you're like getting ready for work and you like open the blinds and yeah guys like with an axe wound in his head is like she's getting the newspaper I mean holy shit okay sorry I should have had this thought process earlier and now I'm doing it in front of you. Keep going. Keep going. OK.

Lord. We're about to go off on a dark tangent, so. Welcome. So they said, well, his blood was found on the front porch. There's nothing to prove that he wasn't the one who had stuck the spare key in the front door. And they had that mystery fingerprint on the phone box to point to.

So the prosecution still wasn't buying it. They followed every possible lead, tried to trace the fingerprint, and it all led to dead ends, and they were still convinced Chris had something to do with it. So the defense was basically arguing, like, Chris was a beloved son. He would never harm anyone, let alone his parents.

And then the prosecution basically came back like... What do the young people say it clapped back oh yeah yeah clapped back showed the receipts is that a thing yeah it's just drink because of that like showing that one I know showing your receiptsing showing digital records like prove it to me Where in text doesn't say that right? No Fuck, I don't know. We're old. We're so is everyone in here old. There's gotta There's gotta be like one 16 year old no and they probably don't let 16 year olds in well, that's true It's 21 and up. Oh, well. OK, but if teenagers could hear us right now,

they'd be losing their minds at how stupid we sound. That's for sure. That's why they don't listen. OK. My poor little sister is just horrified at my existence. OK. Spill the tea. OK, I don't know.

I'm trying really hard. It's so sad. OK. Okay, I don't know. I'm trying really hard. It's so sad. Okay. Um, oh no. The sad thing is even when I was like 16, I still didn't know what the fuck anything was. Like, I still like... I was cool for like a minute, and then like I grew up.

I know you probably fucking were. I just put like skulls on my MySpace, and everyone was like, please stop. Okay, but that's foreshadowing. That was foreshadowing. That was foreshadowing. It is foreshadowing. It's really sad. I remember my mother saw my MySpace

and was like, take that down right now. And I was like, fine. German childhood. OK. So where are we? Oh, right. Terrible murder story that I derailed to talk about my own life.

Okay. Welcome to what a podcast is. Superb. Right, right, right. So the defense was basically like, Chris is innocent, he's an angelic child, he would never harm his parents, etc., etc. And then the prosecution showed the receipts in clap back and also printed out the receipts. No, I said that already. And also spilled the tea. And it was lit. It was lit.

It was lit AF. I'll tell you that much. Oh, Eva's back there like, I quit. Goodbye. Oh, Eva's back there like, I quit, goodbye. Uh, yikes, okay. So they were like, you know what, no, Chris was not as angelic as he was being made out to be, and we're gonna prove it. So, remember the stolen laptops, the reason that, what was his name? It wasn't Lemon, it was the first Boudish, right.

Boudish, the reason Boudish had already met Peter and Joan was because of the stolen laptops. Turns out Chris had stolen the laptops from his own parents and staged a break-in two years before. Yep, not good. And he had tried to. So he had stolen the laptops on break from school. University of Rochester right here, it's lovely.

And he was home for the summer. And he basically staged for the summer, and he basically staged a break and stole their laptops and then tried to sell them on eBay. And when they figured out it was him and he couldn't sell the laptops, he pretended to be his own brother, wrote to the people that he had sold them to, kept their money,

and said, oh, my brother died. It's very tragic. And like kept their money and wouldn't send. It really fucked up. Jeez. So that was step one Then his own frat brothers testified that Chris had led them to believe he was a completely different person He said he he had told everybody at school that he was a rich kid who came from a wealthy family in Connecticut He would often bankroll parties and tell his friends that his family owned a lodge in Vermont and a house in Aruba

and tell his friends that his family owned a lodge in Vermont and a house in Aruba. In the episode, they interview the frat guys multiple times in the episode. And they're so sweet. And there's this part where they're like, and they said his family, there were two of them, like they had a house in the Bahamas. No, it wasn't the Bahamas.

What island was it? And I'm like, it doesn't matter. Anyway. I imagine they just have popped popped collars and like sideways hats. They did. It was lit. Okay. So they were like, oh, it was a ruba. It was right, man. Yeah, it was a ruba. So he lied. He said they had a house in a ruba. All that was bullshit. Like he

was not even from Connecticut. So we made up basically his whole family history. In reality, he was flunking out of school. And he was deeply, deeply in debt, especially because he was not even from Connecticut, so he made up basically his whole family history. In reality, he was flunking out of school, and he was deeply, deeply in debt, especially because he was bankrolling all these frat parties and pretending he had all this money leading an extravagant lifestyle. And what's more, in the days leading up to the attack, Chris's dad, Peter, had actually found out

that Chris had forged his signature to obtain a car loan to buy a yellow Jeep. Huh. Why would you do that? Okay. So he had forged his dad's signature to obtain a car loan and a $31,000 loan to help pay for school. So Peter, his dad, had sent him a series of angry emails

and some of the excerpts include asking what the hell you had done, accusing him of spiraling out of control and saying, like, you've gotten too far, you've crossed the line. And meanwhile, Joan, so his mother, had also written to him, those days before the attack,

telling Chris that his dad was about to have a nervous breakdown over everything that Chris had done to him and that if he didn't call her, she would drive down to Rochester, drive left to Rochester, shit, herself to talk to him. And I think the most heartbreaking thing

is they had the emails in the episode and then they would pull out the excerpts, but if you pause it, you can kind of read the rest of the email. And at the end, they didn't even bring this up, but at the end it said, I may be disappointed in you, but your mother and I still love you

and care about your future, dad. And so that was the end of the email. So even though clearly there was tension and they were fighting, that's just a little bit heartbreaking. What's also chilling is that Peter, the dad, had recently mentioned to a coworker, literally days before the attack, I think my son might be a sociopath. Interesting.

He really said that. He said that. Yeah. She testified at the trial. She was like, yeah, he actually had really serious that. He said that. Yeah. She testified at the trial. She was like, yeah, he actually had really serious concerns about his own son. Not jokingly, seriously thought maybe he might be a sociopath. So Chris had also, there were all sorts of things that he pulled.

He failed out of several classes earlier that year. He forged transcripts so he could be readmitted to school. Several emails between him and his mother showed how angry they were with him for failing out of school and then lying to them. And he would always say, no, it's the registrar's fault. They messed up. And then he would create forged documents, and it was very bad.

So prosecutors present Chris at the trial as broke and desperate. The motive obviously was his parents' money. So alive, they were worth around $60,000. But dead, they would be worth $1.1 million. So they were saying basically his idea was to get the inheritance from their death. At the trial, which was moved to Orange County for some reason, because apparently in Albany, the media coverage

was too intense. So they were like, where should we go? How about Orange County? I don't know. That's Orange County? I don't know. That's in California. I don't know if everybody knows that. I assume so. Wasn't that a TV?

The OC. Yeah. We're not that old. Or maybe we are that old. Maybe. That's sad. OK. So the trial was moved to Orange County because of intense media

coverage here in Albany. Joan actually walked into the courtroom with her arm linked around Chris's. She had still severe scarring and that kind of thing. She continued to insist throughout the trial that he was innocent. And more than 80 witnesses actually took the stand, including the paramedics who were there

when Joan nodded when they were trying to give her oxygen. And Bowdish was asking, do you understand me? Who hurt you? And they had actually witnessed her nodding and shaking her head. And so they testified that they had seen her nod when they, when he had asked if Chris had hurt her. Nine of Chris's fraternity brothers testified.

And they all challenged Chris's alibi. They'd all been in the lounge that night and they said, sorry, bro, we would've seen ya, but we didn't. But thanks for all the parties, I guess. Yeah. See you in Aruba. But, oh, they were so sweet.

But anyway, so they all testified that no, he had not been in the lounge that night. Christopher's older brother, Jonathan, actually also testified, and according to the Albany Times Union, Jonathan... Whoo! Wow. Five people are very impressed about that.

Thank you. It's very impressive. Jonathan's demeanor toward his brother was icy. He described their relationship as strained, and he refused to look at Chris the entire time he was on the stand. Then the defense brought Joan herself to the stand and she explained that she had no memory of the night but was certain that her son would never have done anything to her or her husband. And she explained that she was devastated that just because of

something she doesn't even remember is the reason that he was on trial. The nod is what I'm referencing. In case you forgot. Okay. Oh my gosh. I don't know. I get really wrapped up in my own head and then I lose my notes. Okay. On the afternoon of August 10th, 2006, the jury deliberated for only six hours before finding Christopher Porco guilty of second-degree murder and attempted murder. He was sentenced to 50 years to life on each count, totaling a minimum of 50 years in prison. He's currently incarcerated at Clinton Correctional Facility

in Danimora, New York. Woo! I love that facility. Best prison I've ever seen. Best Correction've ever seen. Best correctional facility. Super nice. Cool. All of his appeals have been rejected and he will not be eligible for parole until December 2052. So he's in there for now. To this day the jurors still maintain that Jones nod was not what convinced them of Chris's guilt.

And they even said, like, when they got to the room to deliberate, they basically said, we're nixing that from our thought process. Like, we don't want that to be, since she doesn't remember it. And it could be that her own neurologist testified and was like, it could be that she was just responding to cues, whatever. So they nixed that whole thing.

So they actually have publicly stated, the jurors, that they want Joan to know that it was not her nod that sent her son to jail, that it was Chris who got himself there. And that is the story of Christopher Portka. Thank you, Albany. That one was a fuckin' trip and a half. What the fuck?

Good job. Good job to you. Thank you. We did it. This is what we do in our hotel room afterwards. You did good, you did good. No, no, no, are you sure I did good? Are you sure?

But the truth is we were both gonna black out after this and not, we're gonna be like, Eva, were we okay? That's truly, this and not we're gonna go even what okay? That's really even did we even go on stage. I don't even remember it was all a fever dream. Yeah Thank you guys for having us. You all we've had You have a beautiful town by the way, I didn't say that but we were driving around and it's beautiful The second we got here. We were like, yeah This fucking rocks. We really really like this area. To be fair We've been in New York for the last four days and we showed up here and we were like, we can breathe

Oh my god. It's clean air. It's not crowded. Beautiful. Um Thank you for so much!