Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - Alec Baldwin DIDN'T Pull the Trigger?!
Episode Date: December 7, 2021Public: Offer valid for U.S. residents 18+ and subject to account approval. This is not a recommendation. You can lose money with any investment. Open To The Public Investing is a member of FINRA & SI...PC. Regulatory and firm fees apply. See Public.com/disclosures/ 0:00 - start 0:30 - dov’s love problems 5:00 - Brittany Renner and Deion Sanders 20:00 - Alec Baldwin is the white Tory Lanez 38:00 - Joel Osteen 56:20 - Chris Cuomo FIRED 1:04:40 - Crime wave in LA 1:19:45 - Black family house appraised 500k under 1:34:50 - spotify taking away comedians money 1:55:55 - Tristan Thompson Flagrant 2 is a comedy podcast that delivers unfiltered, unapologetic, and unruly hot takes directly to your dome piece. In an era dictated by political correctness, hosts Andrew Schulz and Akaash Singh, along with AlexxMedia and Mark Gagnon, could care less about sensitivities. If it’s funny and flagrant it flies. If you are sensitive this podcast is not for you. But if you miss the days of comedians actually being funny instead of preaching to a quire then welcome to The Flagrancy.
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What's up everybody and welcome to Flaker 2
It's your boy Sheltie
I'm here with Akash Singh
We got Mark Gagnon
We got Miles McCreary
We got
Dove Mammon
And we got Alex Media
Let's keep going
So what's going on everybody
Do we have anything to talk about we
do dove your trials and tribulations with finding love in your life as you get closer and closer to
40 what's going on what's going on with that i keep doing my best you keep throwing those road
blocks i don't throw any roadblocks we had a very important meeting there was a girl that you can't
make come remember this girl there's a girl that you can't make come and he can't make her come because what is the reason because he's gay no the pussy stole fire
he comes within 60 seconds oh not even 16 12 seconds that's a compliment in his own right
though yeah of course it is that's on you lucky her that happened once but no she's a girl that
and now you can't come with other girls because you like this girl so much. Is that true?
The guy said he was on double
Cialis. Double
blue chew. He was on
double blue chew and couldn't bust it off.
Hard as a rock, but couldn't bust off.
Oh, you love this girl. You're closed off.
What is this energy? You got your legs crossed. You got your
fucking arms. You're like Bernie Sanders.
You have common weeks, this guy.
If you unlock those legs, I gonna get splattered it's gonna
be enter the spider verse over here this fucking podcast just calm it down okay i'll try back to
you what's going on coming to the wedding you won't let me facetime her let me facetime her
right now so i had this perfect weekend set up and the whole thing of us staying behind was for
a completely other reason i said andrew i need to leave two hours sooner so I can meet this girl at the same time.
I had this beautiful setup happening in Miami.
And you were like, no, no, no, no.
We can't.
We got to have this other talk.
I was like, what does that have to do with it?
And then what happened with the girl?
So she was like, well, then coming tomorrow, it doesn't make sense to fly from LA.
So let's just do it another time.
But hey, New Year's Eve, I'm invited to this incredible, incredible party in Miami. Yeah. five from la so let's just do it another time but hey and now new year's eve new year's eve i'm
invited to this incredible incredible party in miami yeah and i want you to come with me
and then i was like no i can't because i'd rather go to boston and support do your job he has to do
his job god forbid right yeah that's really crazy crazy concept yeah it's really crazy
angle on that one but But then what happened?
Then what happened is you spent the whole weekend knowing that it was kind of fucked up what you did.
Yeah.
But you were like trying to throw a free invite for me to your wedding.
Yeah, yeah.
Which I should already have.
What happened with this girl?
Remember when she didn't answer your text?
Remember that?
No.
Remember that time?
No, no, no.
You shouldn't already have a plus one.
You know how much fucking money a plus one costs?
Do you know that I'm officiating a wedding? Do you know how much money I'm saving them on not hiring a...
You didn't know this?
What do you pay a priest?
That man is doing it for the love of the game.
Don't you do it for the love of the game?
They expect a donation, dog.
Then they expect a donation.
This is how he works out things in his head.
Unbelievable.
He always thinks he's doing things for people that have dollar value.
No thing that he does for you kindly will not have a dollar value in his head.
He keeps a running ledger.
You're a scorekeeper.
You're a scorekeeper.
You're a scorekeeper.
We all have to put dollars in our forehead and kiss the ground.
You can't make girls cum.
Yeah, what's that score?
Yeah.
What's that score?
What's your score with her?
Tell that story.
She's good.
What do you think she's talking about?
She's so good.
She's so fired.
She's so fired
i could be brown i could be blue i can't come from a jew i could be purple i could be hurtful
i'm gonna be a dyke okay guys but that's also not true because we it just is the first round
it's okay let's move on yeah let's start the's move on. Let's not start the pot over.
I think we should acknowledge the elephant in the room.
We didn't talk about it up front, but
I think it's important we acknowledge the elephant in the room.
Obviously, everybody
is listening right now, watching right now.
They want to hear what we have to say.
Dion Sanders, bro.
Dion Sanders brought the fucking goat.
It's good to see him again.
We haven't seen Dion Sanders in a long time. Justion Sanders brought the fucking goat. It's good to see him again. I know, man.
Just seeing him, I got happy.
It felt like he was away for a while.
And then all of a sudden,
he's just there.
And you remember all the good times, all the laughs he brought us.
You're warm.
It was great, dude.
He's always been fly as fuck, too.
He really has. Sense of style. Prime time, dude. Good to see you. Great, man. He's always been fly as fuck, too. He really has.
He really has.
Sense of style.
Got that smash.
Prime time, dude.
Flashy.
Prime time.
Damn right.
So basically what he did is, right now, Deion Sanders, I'm sure everybody who's listening,
you already know what we're talking about.
But to address the elephant in the room, Deion Sanders is the head coach of Jackson State
University football team, obviously.
Though he was a two-sport athlete.
Yeah, he played baseball, but he wasn't as good.
Wasn't as good.
He was good, but not prime time.
Not prime time.
Not prime.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So he has a responsibility as the head coach of a football team, especially a college football
team, to educate these young boys.
Remember, this is not professional sports.
This is collegiate sports.
Yeah.
And he brought in Brittany Renner.
Thought of the century.
Thought of the century.
Yeah.
To have a conversation with these boys about what women could potentially do to them.
I thought that shit was fire.
Did you?
I thought it was absolutely brilliant.
And remember, they can make money now.
Who?
Collegiate athletes.
Oh, that's right.
So that's right.
So the college kids now can make
money they have these potential advertisers sponsorships etc there's going to be girls
like britney renner who are out there potentially targeting them i don't know if she's admitted to
targeting because she was wifed up with pj washington yeah but she kind of admitted to
targeting what would she say she was like oh if you want to come up off a check go with an athlete
they're super dumb yes but she didn't do that about pj washington she did that shit
years before exactly yeah but then she did that kind of and then she ended up doing it yeah so
it's like kind of targeting right to be fair to her like she was wifed up with him like i think
they named the kid pj washington junior like yeah so there was some shit that went out it doesn't
matter i just thought it was dope and i think that this is something like i think the nba tries to do this like they try to educate
they do right so like but they do it financially so it's like oh here's how you get all your money
in order here you put money away for retirement and shit like that but he's doing what counts
he's doing what counts but here's the thing how do you lose the most money if you're a player yeah that is the financial planning
slut maintenance that's what you're gonna lose all your money savings yeah it's fucking slut
savings it's gambling yeah right gambling you can lose crazy money but a lot of these athletes like
i guess they can gamble but there are certain restrictions right is gambling though right
you're like i hope i pull out on time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Otherwise, I'm going to lose half my money.
Imagine having like
the unbelievable
athletic ability
of an athlete.
Like the fast twitch
muscle fibers
that athletes have.
That's the problem
is fast twitch.
Yeah, you got to think.
But they can't just
fast twitch out.
No, but they probably think
I'll get out in time.
I can do it
in the last possible second.
Sperm is faster twitch.
It don't matter
how slow you are.
Bernie Kosar
had fast twitch.
Orgasm is fast twitch. Dove has fast twitch. Dove has fast twitch. Crazy fast twitch. Are we really going to make this happen? Faster Twitch. No matter how slow you are, Bernie Kosar had Fast Twitch first.
Dove has Fast Twitch.
Are we really going to make this happen?
Because it doesn't happen for everyone else.
There's one girl. That's why you know you like them.
What? That you didn't want to come.
That you didn't want to fuck?
In general? No, opposite.
Oh, whatever. It doesn't matter, Dove. We're not going to talk about you anymore, God forbid. Because you know when we're
talking about him, he's calculating how many minutes that he was spoken
about technically i should be paid for those seven minutes that i provide you guys with
entertainment on the podcast and that is part of the fucking running ledger it's part of the ledger
is it not also vala keep an eye on his computer make sure he's not looking up things or hotels
to stay at yeah yeah you get to keep an eye on the queue. He's looking up hotels. Show me the computer right now.
Let me see the computer.
Read the message.
The Westin.
No, it's the W.
It's literally the Westin right there.
That is crazy, Dove.
But what are you doing?
Read it.
I'm literally saving you money in that email right now.
Money you're going to remind him of later.
Absolutely.
That's why he's so quick to show you.
Look at how much money I saved you.
I'm going to start looking at all these other tabs.
Is Rabbi and your wedding considered the wedding gift?
Wow.
He's got to be kidding me.
This has to be a joke.
I would like everyone to submit comments
on Andrew's profile.
If I'm giving you a wedding gift.
Should I allow him to wear
his uh religious paraphernalia no wedding i get one thing you either step on the glass i wear the
shawl or i wear a kipa you pick i'm also wearing a kipa why you made me kiss the ground
but he's not you don't get to dictate the religion at his wedding. That's the problem. Why are you hiring me?
That's true.
That's what I'm asking.
Why are you hiring him?
Why am I hiring you?
Because I'm good at it.
You are good at it.
Yeah.
It'll be the most I got to speak without you cutting me off.
That's also true.
No, no, no.
You're still going to get cut off.
You're going to be in the middle of it.
You're going to be like, we're gathered here today.
If you're wedding had YouTube subscribers, them shits would plummet.
Yeah, that's facts, bro.
Your wedding's also behind a paywall.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We should put it on Patreon.
He's trying to convert you, bro.
Do you think that's what it is?
That's what I think, yo.
That's what I think.
Throw a little water on you and shit.
Do you know what he's doing?
Yo, you know what he's doing?
Throw a little water on him.
Seltzer.
He's trying to occupy real estate
at that house where you're having a wedding see
i thought that i was doing you a favor with this i thought the girls would see you up there and
you'd be looking all beautiful and the sun is setting behind you so we can't see the bald spot
there's just all these advantages to you wearing the kipper
i like the way you said it i like the way
if you really care about and you If you really care about Andrew
If you really care about Andrew
Where a Yankee's fitted at the wedding
If you really care about Andrew's fit
Oh we'll be matching then
Mixed jacket
Let's go
I'm just so scared
I'm gonna look so much better
Than him at the wedding though
He's gonna look sharp at the wedding
Yeah
He's gonna look really sharp
I wear the same thing
Every day on this podcast
Yeah
What do you think Okay Okay What is the over and under what is that saying
someone called dave portland how do you do gambling no what is the over under 205 pounds
are you over two hold on are you over two? Pay me $100 for every pound under I am.
No.
No, no, no.
Then he's going to lose the weight.
You can't do that to him.
That's what motivates him.
No, that I already am at.
Yeah.
Because he's saying he's like 180 or something?
No.
Oh.
Dang.
He's over 190.
No.
What are you at?
187.
189.
Yeah.
Really?
I fight to stay under that number.
Dude, yesterday, I want to say this.
And I want to say this as a friend who's like, 100%.
I want to say this as a friend who's concerned because I do mean this and I want to have
a kind of an impression about this.
I mean this sincerely.
Yes.
Yesterday, right?
Listen, listen, listen.
This is serious.
This is serious. This is serious.
Okay?
Listen, then we're going to
actually acknowledge the...
We're going to address
the elephant in the room.
Maybe we should do it right now.
Maybe we've been addressing
the elephant in the room
the whole fucking time, John!
Okay?
Seriously.
Turn your head sideways.
We'll see your trunk.
Does anybody have a peanut he could just sniff up real quick okay so this is i mean this seriously no i'm just being serious here
yesterday i saw something that concerned me okay he hadn't eaten remember we had a call
right we had a call about the podcast right he's offline texting during the call. I'm starving.
I'm breaking down.
I haven't eaten since 9 p.m. the night before.
9 p.m.?
9 p.m.?
That's not early.
If you had dinner at 5 p.m. the night before.
It was 5 p.m. that day.
No, it was not.
It was 2 o'clock.
It was 2 o'clock.
He didn't eat from 9 p.m.
That was a stretch.
Bro, that's a brunch. You go to brunch at 2 o'clock. The was 2 o'clock. He didn't eat from 9 p.m. That was a stretch. Bro, that's a brunch.
You go to brunch at 2 o'clock.
The guy is falling apart.
We sit down.
He's already ordering by the time I get to the table.
It's still 17 hours.
Right?
He goes, I have to eat bread.
I haven't eaten since 9 p.m.
I didn't say bread.
You did.
You go, I would like.
He goes, I'll have a fried chicken sandwich, French fries, and then fried green tomato.
Everything was fried.
Wow.
Mark ate it.
What's going on?
Mark is trying to gain weight.
Mark is getting brolic as fuck, actually.
He's getting brolic as fuck.
Okay.
And you?
What do you look like?
You eat fourth meal every single night.
I do eat fourth meal every single night, but I don't eat bread.
You did this to me.
I don't eat bread, and I had gumbo.
You did that gumbo.
I had gumbo.
I had one and a half bowls of gumbo, and I passed out for two hours immediately.
Oh, yeah.
You almost missed the show.
I know.
There was something in that gumbo. Missed the sound check. There was something in the fucking gumbo. I passed out for two hours immediately. Oh, yeah. You almost missed the show. I know. There was something in that gumbo.
Miss the sound check.
There was something in the fucking gumbo.
I don't know what it was.
Wake him up.
Yeah, yeah.
He's asleep.
Derek came in.
I know Dove probably told him to do this.
Derek came in, wake me up.
And I was like, all right, bro, I'm up.
And he's like, all right, bro.
Should I just kind of hang out in here?
And I was like, okay.
And then I was like, I got to shower.
He's like, yeah, I'll just hang out over there.
And I know 100% Dove is like, go in the room and don't leave the room until he walks out
of the fucking hotel.
Did you say that?
The people of Jacksonville deserve everything.
By the way, one of the best shows I've seen you do.
It was a lot of fun, dude.
Jacksonville is great.
Jacksonville is a lot of fun.
Shouts to Lil Duval.
Lil Duval.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's the fucking legend.
You had Duval energy.
You were great, bro. Yeah, maybe he was inspired was inspired man all this is inspired greatly by little duval yeah like he really and he's just a fucking man dude the guy flies his own plane to the show
that's incredible his schedule was so funny he's like the show was at like nine and he was like
7 30 yeah but it was nine o'clock we were talking he was like yeah i'm gonna be in my bed by 12
i was like where's your bed he's like atlanta yep fire he's like yeah i'm just gonna fire
his fuck dude i gotta get life figured out yeah he's the fucking man and he's inspired so much
of this the road like even the way that like i tackle comedy and so many people are inspired
by him that they don't even realize it so huge shouts to duple yeah but uh serious note let's
address the elephant in the room shall we yeah oh Yeah. Oh, wait, real quick. Can I say one thing about Dion? Please.
I thought this was great recruiting by him for other athletes.
Oh, genius.
Because realistically, Jackson State is good for what they are, but how many of those guys
are going pro, going to make millions of dollars?
He's recruiting other players.
Brilliant.
Brittany Renner not trying to fuck no Jackson State University athlete?
Yeah, she's fucking dudes that play Kentucky.
At Bama.
Yeah.
Kentucky ball players.
They gotta do that as a football drill.
You go to the bar, see Brittany Renner and try to resist her.
Yeah.
Yeah, like Oklahoma drills, you gotta turn around and see her.
That's it right there.
And then you gotta fucking try to power through.
That's the move.
That's kind of smart.
I like this.
He's better at recruiting young talent than Brittany Renner.
That motherfucker is about it, dog.
She's fucked way better dudes than he's recruited she's way better
her roster is better than his roster in terms of getting players to play i'm gonna put athletes
versus athletes you think he's got better or worse players than she's fucked he's got worse
players than she's fucked yeah yes just give him time yes hey just give him time. Yes. Hey, just give him time. Yes. He going to get there. I don't think that any of the players on his team start on hers.
You're right there.
Damn.
Yeah.
Not yet.
That's an interesting game to play.
Young Brittany?
No, hold on.
That's an interesting game.
Whose pussy got the best start in five?
Yeah.
Wow.
Honestly, Kendall Jenner?
Kendall Jenner got some ball players, bro.
Who was it before that?
Ben Simmons. Ben Simmons. That's right. Devin Booker. Tristan Thompson? Blake Griffin? got some ball players, bro. Who was it before that? Ben Simmons, Devin
Booker.
Tristan Thompson? Blake Griffin?
Blake Griffin, I think.
Was it Kuzma, too? Kuzma.
It was always hanging around.
Yeah, she got some joints,
bro. Brittany Renner, though. She got
Cap. She got P.J. Washington.
She got a bunch of other dudes we'll never know about.
Kendall's got it. She outperforms. She got a bunch of other dudes we'll never know about. Kendall's got it.
She outperforms.
This is interesting about her.
And you got to give her credit for this.
She's not really taking down A-list, but is spoken about like an A-list.
Oh, wow.
Yeah.
Who is she taking down A-list?
Usually the A-list they keep quiet.
But she's the girl that dropped all the secrets, remember?
No, she's calculated with it.
It's like, I'll tell these guys because they don't matter.
But the A-list is like, hey, look, I'll keep your secret so I can keep fucking A-list guys.
But didn't Superhead drop everybody she fucked?
And she ruined her whole game.
And nobody fucked her no more.
Yeah, that's interesting.
Because we talk about her like Superhead, but Superhead gave way bigger names than Brittany Renner ever gave.
Not that she didn't fuck him.
Maybe she does it strategically, but she's in that class of thought.
What is Superhead doing now?
We got to do an interview with her.
She changed the game.
She changed the game.
She changed the game.
After that video came out, so many girls tried the basket weave technique.
Oh, yeah.
That was her.
The Indian burn.
That's her. That changed the game.
You think she invented that move?
No, I think she made it pop.
She normalized sucking dick good?
Yeah.
Remember when these girls used their mouth just?
Remember that?
When they would just go mouth just?
That was crazy, right?
Paris Hilton might have the best roster.
According to this article, she hooked up with
Heisman Trophy winner
Can I be honest with you when she came out
With that dick suck
Keep in mind this is an heiress
She ain't gotta suck no dick in her life
But she wasn't famous though
She was just an heiress
She's a legit heiress
She don't gotta suck nobody's dick if she don't want to
And there's gonna be dudes lining up
To get some of that Hilton money yeah that's true so apparently she still sucked
dick good she apparently took down cristiano ronaldo yeah whoa oscar de la jolla whoa brian
urlacher yeah andy roddick who's a tennis player then former heisman trophy winner matt lenart
line art line liner fucking idiot that's what I said he never made the NFL bad liner
it has art
in the name
you frenched it up
dog
Lenart
that's what he was
supposed to pronounce
that's not a
fucking soccer
legit I was like
that was soccer player
I thought it was a
black kid
I was like
who's Lenart
Lenart McKelvey maybe
the guy I do a podcast
with once a week
okay yeah
Paris got it
held down that was a good roster jeter was the best for the guys
oh dude oh dude jeter's i mean it's amazing but you know he just has third kid bravo
there you go respect bravo three daughters super duper fire girl what'd you call her
no third daughter third daughter oh that's what happens yeah yeah that's how it happens
handing out herpes around manhattan wow don't
put that on here jessica beale oh yeah that's not one of those fucking horse
one of those horse people are hurt on the to the king why don't you bring britney renner to teach
us about i would love britney renner to come teach us and our wives wait son this guy
yo this mary ch Mary Chelsea's out here, dog
You know what I'm saying?
Suck dick more
I love it
Okay
Can you guys hit it
When you know the right time to hit it
Alright, fellas?
The last time I received a blowjob
Was September 2020
It was deep in the pandemic.
And she had convinced me to get a manscape
to shave my bush down.
And that that would give me way more blowjobs
than I had previously gotten.
Ha, ha, ha.
Joke's on me.
I didn't.
That is all.
Do you not know that song?
No.
Ow, where have you been?
Where the fuck have you been, bro?
Where's Brittany Reddick when you do this?
I need to be put up on game right now.
Oh, Jesus.
Fuck, fuck, dude.
I mentioned Brittany Reddick.
The table got wet.
What are we talking about, man?
Fucking crazy shit.
I can tell you what we're talking about.
I don't know what y'all are talking about.
Y'all are just talking about crazy shit.
Y'all got to respect your wives, bro.
Y'all got to respect your motherfucking wives.
Thank you very much.
Okay, let's address the elephant in the room.
Can we?
Please, finally.
Thank you, God.
What do you think about Alec Baldwin?
Alec Baldwin.
Yeah.
He's the white Tory Lanez.
Whoa!
Hot take!
Shot a girl.
Yeah.
Claims never to have shot the gun.
Wow.
He didn't pull the trigger.
He didn't pull the trigger, but okay.
Go on that. Go on that. Keep going on trigger. He didn't pull the trigger, but okay. Go on that.
Go on that.
Keep going on that.
He jumped out in front of the court cases.
He put his version of an album out.
He dropped a motherfucking album, bro.
Yeah.
Holy shit.
And now he's swaying the audience.
Like people are thinking he's good.
He's not guilty.
Do you think?
I think the majority of people feel that it's not on him it
should have been on everybody else to check the gun and all that but you don't think they felt
that way before i thought everybody i think initially people jumped on him were like oh you
should have checked the gun it's your responsibility to check the gun now they're like oh why is there
live round on the set in the first place so yeah i mean if you've ever been on a movie set
you'll know that it's actors responsibility
to do nothing like they don't get their own coffee nothing they don't let you do anything
they baby you they don't even let you they it's just you could oh actually no maybe you're right
sometimes they're like follow you around i remember i did a student film and i went to
chipotle on my own they're like do please don't do that if you need anything ask us and i was like
what do people in real films do like if will smith was like hey fly to columbia every day get me some
coffee beans somebody would do it yeah you're worth that so that's what we'll do yeah money
wise you bring in that much that's what we have to do all right guys look i'm getting married it's
gonna be a couple weeks off for the infamous tour but new year's and the day before new year's eve
so new year's eve and New Year's Eve's Eve,
we're going to be in Boston celebrating with y'all.
All three shows are sold out.
That's going to be some fucking crazy stuff, man.
We're going to have some fun there.
I'm on the fence about adding a fourth show.
I'll let you guys convince me,
but you're going to have to do it very soon
if you want to convince me
because once I go get married, I'm out.
I'm off the grid for a couple weeks so you
have a little time but please go do it check out uh the website we had a bunch of those canadian
shows are up vancouver calgary uh winnipeg um toronto y'all been so fucking good to us man
that's been crazy we got new orleans pittsburgh we added a show in pittsburgh i mean so many others
california with a bunch of shows just
go check out theandrewschultz.com make sure you get those tickets so that you don't miss out also
you got to make sure you check out Akash Singh on tour you can go to his website akashsingh.com
for links for tickets he is going to be in Washington DC December 9th through 11th and he's
going to be in Dallas January 7th through the 8th make sure you go check him the fuck out okay amazing comedian
has an incredible hour go check him akashsingh.com for those tickets all right guys we're gonna take
a break for a second because i gotta tell you about the best fucking underwear i've ever put
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I love these guys, and they're fucking killing it with this brand.
I need you to go to culprit underwear.com use the code flagrant at checkout for 25 off that's 25 off that's a holiday sale that's from us to y'all go to
culprit underwear.com use that code flagrant for 25 off let's get back to this show yeah i don't
know i just i saw it and i was like dude i get what you're saying now and i started watching the whole video you have to watch the whole thing you gotta watch the whole thing yeah
because the the thing okay so basically he's like i didn't pull the trigger right which he didn't
pull the trigger now when you have a um what is it called i think it was a colt 45 right single
action army revolver yeah so it's a revolver when you have a revolver the pulling of the trigger
pulls that
hammer thing back yeah you know you see like in the old western movies where like they're going
like this to shoot fast so what he said is that the the dp i think helena is her name helena
hutchinson is telling him exactly where to point the gun like he's taking all the guilt off himself
he's like she told me to point the gun she told me to do this she was telling me i was just listening and let me tell you something like actors are not especially an
actor of his stature going to do a little fucking shitty film he's not gonna be like so deferential
to this random like uh girl from sweden that's like a dp like there's no fucking way the guy's
on snl every weekend like he was putting the shit wherever he wants i imagine but let's just go with
her story it doesn't matter he said he uh suggested to pull the hammer of the gun back and then he let it go
there should have never been a live round in there but still letting the hammer go
is pulling the trigger yeah it's actually faster than pulling it's fast yeah when they need to
shoot fast in the westerns they go like this because they're like i can't do that that takes
too long so you didn't pull the trigger, but you shot the gun.
It's effectively shooting the gun.
Yeah.
So it's not your fault.
That round should never have been in there, et cetera.
But like, why are you trying to create this like.
Legally loophole.
Yes.
Dude, that was the grossest part is seeing everybody around this thing be like, oh, this is such a tragedy.
This is so sad.
We loved her so much but
this wasn't my fault at all yeah this was somebody else everybody did that the fucking production
company him everybody's like no it's not my fault no she was amazing but this is not and it's not
his fault but the fact that he's going so far to prove it's not his fault makes me hate him if
you're explaining you're losing if you're, you're losing. TB12 method.
I think also the first part, so apparently he took down his Twitter because he was getting so much hate after the interview.
We don't know why, but that's what we're speculating.
It's because also ABC, the first eight minutes of the interview was like asking a bunch of
dumb ass questions where he's like, yeah, this movie really rekindled my love of acting.
I don't give a fuck, bro.
I don't care how you felt about filming this movie.
That movie seems fire, fam.
Bro, right?
I want to see that movie.
Not I, bro.
No, I'm about that movie.
They got to rename it, though.
They got to call it John Wick 4.
That's what they're doing.
Like, all right, fire.
It is dead in the water, dog.
That'd be dope.
No, I thought it looked kind of cool.
Do you know what the plot of the movie is?
Yeah, he's an outlaw that's going around with his grandson.
And he has to try to cover up for his grandson who was convicted of accidentally killing someone oh shit that's what i read that's the plot of the
movie like he's like with his grandson they're on the run because he accidentally killed someone
the grandson's just a method actor yo maybe he's just trying to get into his grandson's psyche. Oh my god. That's not a good look. Yeah.
Oh my god.
I think I would yeah I would
absolutely see that.
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
What?
Did we say something wrong?
Did I say something?
Yeah it is.
Somebody died.
It's a tragedy.
Yeah it's a tragedy.
It's a tragedy.
And all these motherfuckers
are just
I don't know.
And I was trying to talk
to Mark about this
the other day
but I was like
why am I so enraged
by this?
Like why does he need to be even less,
even more innocent
than he already is?
There's something about that that fucking irks me.
I don't like how it was marketed, too.
They did a trailer for it.
With the music.
That made me sick.
How does that help the family?
A woman died, there's children without a mother,
and then they get to turn on the TV and it's Alec Baldwin being like,
this is so difficult. And why it's like what and why has nobody
interviewed that purple haired dyke they put the fucking bullets in the gun i thought i had
you haven't seen that girl yeah yeah the joker
she's good lawyers i gotta tell her don't say nothing but still you can't find her outside
of a wendy's or something like that like she's going to be outside of a Wendy's on Westport
Street at about 1 a.m. You think Wendy's?
No.
Macadona.
No, the dollar pizza.
She could be a dollar pizza spot. She could be at McDonald's at Target.
100%. One of her dungarees
just hanging open. What is that thing?
Overall. Yeah, one of her
overalls just hanging open, dressed like Mouse Jones
and some fucking brilliant idiots. She's going to be at a McDonald's at 2 a.m just like mouse jones some brilliant idiots
and you could just ask her right there why'd you put live ammunition in the gun
because that that i bet you it's because that helena hutchinson the dp that was shot and killed
won't give her no pussy i bet you that i bet you that i bet you that i bet you they're in this
they're in this old west movie right she got no got no other lesbos that she could go down on or something like that.
Helena Hutchins was like, nah, I got kids.
I don't want to do this shit.
I'm worried about my career.
And she's like, all right, bet.
All right, bet.
We all make choices.
Yo.
Yes or no?
I'm going to add to it.
You don't think that's possible?
You don't think it's possible?
You don't think it's her fault that this happened?
Bullies get angry, bro.
Bullies get angry.
Are you trying to get her out of culpability for this?
You think it's not her fault this happened?
You're making it sound like it's Helena's fault.
No.
It's the Joker's fault.
Yo, you never blame the victim, dog.
Come on.
Women are allowed to say no.
But these bullies don't play games, bro.
Have you ever turned down a bully?
No, you haven't.
You turned down a bully.
It's a problem.
It was crazy
how he kept saying there's two victims here he kept saying throughout he's talking about no no
to be fair he's talking about the guy who who the girl who died and the other guy who got shot oh
you thought he was talking about himself no i swear i think he was talking about he said i would
too but early on he goes let's be clear i'm not a victim which is a little political but he did
take himself out i was like yo you're a wild boy for now.
Yeah, that would have been wild.
People are forgetting what happened to me.
Yo, I'm going to be honest.
I think Hollywood diversity casting is a problem here.
You can't have some liberal ass woman doing this job.
I don't give a fuck, dude.
Oh, the gun shit.
You need a conservative, redneck, a little bit racist bearded hunting ass
because motherfucker doing that armorer job yo that was her dad that was her dad get her pop
bro yeah i'm not gonna get michael jordan's daughter to be on my starting five yo that's
a good ass point diversity so her dad was a conservative guy i mean i don't know if he's
strong men make uh what is the thing
strong men make uh big dykes gun dykes strong men make gun dykes that's what it is right strong men
make gun dykes i think that's how it goes that's my favorite cartoon gun dyke no gundam what is it
gundam or gun dykes no that's your song gundyke style oh gundyke style gundyke style
but uh in all seriousness dude i think you're making a good point why don't we hire the people
that are good at this shit bro you don't want some liberal motherfucking gun owner no chance dog
you can't be pro-choice and do that job yeah you gotta be a fucking conservative dog right to life
right to life unless i am that shit yeah yeah there you go right to life that's
a good ass point what are some other positions in hollywood we should uh hire in that way son
that might be the one only kind of thing other ones that doesn't have like only liberals to do
this thing like how do you hire specific people we do this culturally all the time probably finance
is like if you have like the financier of the movie you probably want them to be conservative
you want someone that's like oh yeah yeah yeah given the key grip equal pay
and shit get out of here also there's an argument for nepotism being the cause of this like this
girl got this opportunity just because her dad was an armorer maybe she don't know about guns
i'm okay with nepotism it's the fucking duck dynasty family but if you're gonna raise this
a daughter no chance no no liberal woman raised in
california no chance do we know anything about her dove are you familiar with her son she fucked up
multiple times i i wish i haven't written my notes somewhere but she has in other movies been like
she's had violations she's had concerns about safety handling guns this is not her first mistake
there was like a misfire already like the before. Yeah, yeah. Dude, the guy walked off the set
because he was like,
nothing is,
he said live rounds
have gone off on this set
a couple of times.
Now they were blanks,
but.
I don't want to be stereotypical,
but do we know her cycle?
Do we know her menstrual cycle?
Do you think that
that could have played part of it?
Do you think that she had
a big fucking bloody period?
Do you think that she was hiding
a big old bloody period
in them jeans?
In them Jordashes? Do you think that, do you think that she was hiding a big old bloody period in them jeans and them jordashes do you think that you think if she took off them jordashes there was a big old bloody period do you think that's why anyway the bugle boys
i think alec ball is the only actor who's gonna get typecast like the opposite way
you know it was a wild line?
He said,
he was like,
I'll certainly never do a movie
with a gun again.
And I was like,
you just told us
you're gonna do movies again?
What the fuck are you doing, man?
I can't wait.
He just rekindled his love for movies.
Yeah, exactly.
He's like,
yeah,
it took the death of an innocent woman
for me to rekindle my love.
This movie made me believe.
But yeah,
he's gonna be typecast
the opposite way.
Instead of always getting cast
as one character,
he's just never gonna get cast
as the gun guy.
Like, no matter what the movie, it's gonna be like six bandits and he's just gonna be like, and Alec Baldwin is the opposite way. Instead of always getting cast as one character, he's just never going to get cast as the gun guy. No matter what the movie,
it's going to be like six bandits and he's just going to be like and Alec Baldwin is the nice guy.
He's the knife thrower.
And then it's going to be like Alec Baldwin accidentally knifed
the actor.
Dude, that is kind of crazy.
Is there any chance that this is a setup?
By whom?
They're saying no live rounds should be on a set.
Period.
So the fact that there were two, one goes off ahead of time and they don't check every single fucking round to make sure that shit don't happen again.
Can I tell you how ridiculous that is?
You know, when you had a restaurant and like a glass breaks. Yeah.
Like by the bar and they take all the ice out of the thing.
Yeah.
Underneath the bar. Like one little shred of glass could have gotten all the ice out of the thing underneath the bar. One little
shred of glass could have gotten into the
ice bucket. So I got to remove all
the fucking ice. They should have thrown out every bullet
on that set if there was a live round that
they didn't know about. I think it was set up. And that was
up to the armor, right? So who set it up?
I mean,
he was taking some shots at Trump.
Yo. You think Trump set it up?
Also the union people that walked off the set, too.
That's right.
The union people walked off the set.
Non-union.
No, no, but he was super supportive of IATSE.
He was supportive of the union.
He was super supportive of IATSE.
They thanked him.
He did a whole thing about IATSE, do what you got to do.
Because these executives don't give a fuck about you, of whom I am one.
Yeah.
He's an EP on the thing.
Bro, it was funny.
In the beginning of the conversation, when he was talking about being a producer, he made very clear that he wasn't a producer that hired anybody.
Did you see that?
I was a producer, but in name only.
I'm here to act and maybe choose and casting, but nothing else.
I'm not hiring anybody.
I'm not working.
In other words, I didn't hire the person.
The armorer.
Producer in name only.
Yeah, producer in name only.
Which is true.
When you get famous enough you just
you're an ep of everything you're on because you make more money that way yeah but he made that
incredibly clear to everybody yeah i don't know man i don't know it was a weird situation um so
does he go down for this no i think he's completely clean i don't know if you could put him in shit
without the stain of it yeah like every time i see him i'm like oh that's the guy that shot that poor woman yeah right but and he's trying to remove that right now but what i what i
think that he did is is made us resent him like we felt bad and if he just stayed in mourning and
stayed out of the public eye we'd be like man it's so tragic what happened to this fucking poor guy
like the worst possible thing i mean the worst possible thing happened to her but like the worst
possible thing that doesn't kill you.
It happened to you.
I also would have believed if he was like more emotional,
he seemed a little bit like matter of fact about it all.
Yeah.
When,
if you're like really racked with guilt and y'all fucking killed somebody and
this is driving me crazy.
His little Kyle Rittenhouse cry.
Yeah.
But if he was,
if he was emotional,
like,
dude,
I,
I,
I,
I killed somebody. Even if I didn't think whatever, like if he was just more emotional about it dude i i i do i killed somebody even if i didn't think
whatever like if he was just more emotional about it now he's in survival mode motherfucker wants
to get invited to the party still like he wants to be in these movies but you get invited by being
emotional when it like there was a body language expert that believed everything he was saying
he was the hammer didn't pull the trigger like we don't think you did this intentionally yeah
like the fact that you're explaining it makes me think you actually killed this girl yeah like we all know you didn't do it
why would you shoot a girl on your set of your movie yeah why would you come to work and then
shoot the fucking dp that's crazy now that you keep telling me that you didn't do it it's like
saying i'm not gay i'm not gay remember that guy who goes every fucking christmas i ain't gay no
more i'm delivered oh
yeah you know that black dude who was in the church doing it hilarious like that guy's gay
yeah he if you say i'm not gay more than three times you're gay it's candy man you've said it
three times before i'm not gay mark come on all right alec baldwin is a gay black dude in church
that's what he said yeah well he was in a church when it happened
I mean what makes it a church
I mean
it was built to be a church
and then it's always a church forever
they put limelight in a church
then it became a club or is that always a church
I mean if it's built like a church
like you've been in like an old store
what about them Hispanic churches that they put in fucking office depot well that wasn't built to like a church, it's like you've been in like an old store. What about them Hispanic churches that they put in fucking Office Depot?
Well, that wasn't built to be a church.
But it is a church.
Those things be lit.
Slappin'. Slappin'.
It's a party.
It's like a fucking baby shower in a bitch.
Yeah.
That became a church.
That became a church.
It wasn't built to be a church.
They got the same signage as the store.
It was before they just put church on it.
It's a subway.
They got the same color.
Church way. Hey, wait. Hey, wait. But yeah. Okay. it was before they just put church on it it's a subway it got the same color churchway hey wait
but yeah okay so if it's built to be a church yeah it's still a church you ever go to the
walgreens it was a bank and you walk in there like oh this was a bank we're in a bank it's a
walgreens but it's got bank shit yeah but you can't make no fucking deposits yeah but you can't
cash your checks you can't like you know do church service because it's not an active
church so it's not a church no church though if you can't do a church service is not a church
that's it i mean you can do a church you can do a church service what if you can't and also you
can deposit yeah atm well then it's a church slash bank the church bank it's a church bank it's joel
olstein is it good transition that was the real elephant in the room that we want to talk about.
Joel Osteen.
So apparently some plumber was fixing up his church.
Joel Osteen is this like a super, what are they called?
Not pastors.
Megachurch.
Megachurch preacher?
Preacher?
Televangelist?
I don't think he's that.
He doesn't say he has like healing powers.
But he's like a preacher who's very much about like, God wants you to be rich.
It's okay to be rich.
Prosperity gospel.
Prosperity gospel. Prosperity gospel.
Prosperity gospel.
The most American shit ever.
God bless it.
He's a televangelist, though.
Is he?
That's where you're...
When he does it on television?
On TV.
I mean, we have a real Christian here.
What the fuck is he?
You know what he is.
He's an American pastor.
He's a pastor.
You hate these fucking Christians.
Be honest about how you feel about them.
I think most Christians actually probably don't like the mega church, like Prosperity
Don't speak on behalf of them, you Catholic.
Then why are they mega?
Why do they got so many people?
Listen, I need you to speak as a Catholic on these little fucking goofy TV Christians
because that's how you feel.
Deep down, let it out.
These little TV Christians mocking your religion.
You're there every single fucking Sunday.
He plowed a base on them.
He plowed a base on them.
He plowed a base on them.
That's still on the dollar. That's still the money. Whatever the fuck it is. You in there you're listening to latin fucking that shit out on your knees up on your knees up right
but these fucking christians are out there banging chicks
getting forgiven making crazy bread while you're giving all your bread to the church, right?
Lord knows what they're doing with it.
Lord does know.
Lord does know.
And Lord forgives them and moves them around to other places, too.
It's a very interesting Lord.
Shuffle, baby.
Shuffle.
I want to know how you feel about these Christians using your cross, bro.
Using your fucking cross, not even reading the Bible.
Not even reading the Bible, dude.
Just sitting up there, saying stupid shit all fucking day right how do you feel about them bro god oh you're a
preacher with an interesting voice here's 20 000 people yeah tell me how you feel
tell me how you fucking feel
about their music making a mockery of your commandments.
You should have interviewed Alec Baldwin.
You'd be like, Alec Baldwin, what happened when you shot that woman?
When you shot her in the chest.
Why did you do it?
And he'd be like, well, actually.
And you'd be like, shut up.
Why do you have those bags under your eyes, you fucking freak?
Well, what actually happened.
No.
You murdered that woman.
That poor woman.
That mother of two.
I just pulled the hammer.
Not the actual shit.
No, that's murder.
You fucking murderer.
Now you tell me about these Christians.
Yeah.
Okay?
Uh-huh.
Go.
Tell me how you really fucking feel.
We're all, you know, invited to God's choir.
Oh.
Mic drop. Mic drop. He didn't say they get into heaven, though. We're all, you know, invited to God's choir. Oh.
Mic drop.
Mic drop.
He didn't say they get into heaven, though.
He said you can come to the concert.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. He said y'all can come to the concert.
It's a festival.
They're going to be on the outside.
He said God will judge you.
That's what he said.
You're invited to God's choir, and he can see how well you sing.
Yeah.
That's how it goes, bro.
Keep it a buck.
Maybe not you, a hypothetical person who is a devout Catholic.
How would a hypothetical person who is a devout Catholic feel about those Christians?
Some people might look at it as watered-down Christianity.
It's using the gospel as a way to pull money out of innocent people to make individuals wealthy.
Don't give a shit!
Don't give a shit!
Don't give a shit!
Don't give a shit!
But when God calls us to the gates, will we not sing?
That was fucking shots fired.
Let's go, boy.
I just pulled the hammer.
I just pulled the hammer, bro.
Yeah.
Come on, bro.
Let's fucking go.
Come on, bro.
Ain't nobody fucking with you, man.
Yeah.
And don't let them bastardize your religion, son.
Yeah.
Let's go.
Say that shit one more again.
Say that shit one more again.
What they doing?
What these Christians doing, yo?
Come on. Keep going. What else
might some people say? Say it with your
chest. A little bigger.
I think Kyle Rittenhouse
has a Catholicism, bro. I'm just saying.
Listen, if any of y'all watching right now are Christians,
Mark is wild, son.
That's a wild motherfucking boy.
We appreciate y'all. What do you mean?
Spread that monetary gospel over here to
patreon.com slash flagrant2.
Church of Flagrant.
See what I'm saying?
Ha!
Okay.
Mark, so keep on going.
How do them Catholics talk about them Christians?
What might some people say?
Most Catholics aren't really concerned about that.
What might some people say?
We're not even thinking about y'all.
They're not even on our radio.
He said we're not even thinking about y'all.
Oh, shit.
Wow.
Why not?
Wow. You're the first why are you
looking at the next you know what i mean like yo mark coming with heat right now mark and dove just
sitting there quietly like that's how we feel about oh yeah five thousand years ago we were
here first damn boy so catholics don't even really take christians serious like that
i don't think so keep it like that I don't think so
keep it a buck
so when you see someone that's Christian
what is that like
what is the equivalent
is it like a diet
is it like beyond meat
is it diet soda
wow
you're calling them all gay
you're calling them all gay rapists
that's wild
holy shit spiritus santum You're calling them all gay, yo. You're calling them all gay rapists, yo. That's wild.
Holy shit.
Spiritus Sanctus. I plurvis unum.
I plurvis unum.
Oh, my God.
Everyone's saved through Jesus.
So if you believe Jesus, God will deal with you.
That's how it goes.
God will deal with you, dog.
He said God will deal with you.
He didn't say God will accept you.
God will deal with all of us.
Wait, hold on. I didn't know that. I like. God will deal with all of us. Wait, hold on.
I didn't know that.
I like that he just murked this motherfucker out the window, son.
Oh, shit.
Yeah.
Well, they believe in Jesus.
You don't believe in Jesus?
Nah, I got it too.
He murked at you.
He believes Jesus.
He believes Jesus.
Right next to you.
Guys spraying like bowling out here, son.
Shit.
He took out two of us.
He got you, but he killed me
Akash was here first
by the way that's true
the Jew was before the Indian
following the years not out there
the Jew was before the Indian
organized religion Hinduism
talk your shit bro kick him in the face Akash
hold on one second
hold on one second
let's just hold on one second
let's just hold on one second let's address one second. Yeah, yeah. Let's just hold on one second.
Let's just hold on one second.
Let's just hold on one second. The elephant in the room.
Let's address the elephant in the room.
That was good.
Let's address the elephant in the room here.
There is an elephant in the room here.
Now, the oldest organized religion, right?
But you're not the oldest people.
I don't know for the oldest people.
The oldest people have to be close to Africa.
That's black people.
Yeah.
Gang, gang.
They're not Jews, bro.
Unless you believe
them motherfuckers in times square they are jews yeah yeah they're one of the 12 tribes you know
the time yeah those don't think joseph got up no was it who was it who got over there to ethiops
joseph coney who are you talking about coney yeah it was coney
direct descendant of one of the 12 tribes of Israel. 100%. His tribe was popping. Yeah, it really was, dude.
It was super good.
We love them, though.
Huh?
And you donated to his tribe.
I did donate to his tribe.
I absolutely did.
And he goes by the rules.
Like, 13, you're an adult.
Like, you're in the army.
You know what I mean?
Like, bar mitzvah, give him a fucking AK, he's ready to go.
Let's fight for freedom.
You know?
Did we ever have a conversation?
I for an eye, two for a diamond.
He did all that, yeah.
Yes, he did.
100%. But should we just have a conversation two for a diamond he did all that yeah yes he did 100 but should we just have a conversation has anybody ever sat down these people
the rebels in africa has anybody just had to sit down people what why can't we say these people
if you said those people that'd be crazy, why can't we say these people?
Like, why can't we just say it?
Why is that wrong just to say these people?
I don't know.
Isn't that better than what you're thinking?
You know what I mean?
Like, isn't it such an improvement over, like, what's actually going on in your head? Like, when you say these people and you have to grit your teeth, you know what I mean?
These people.
Like, isn't that better or no? Yeah, it's like African-American. You know what i mean like that like isn't that better or no yeah it's like
african-american uh you went off you went a long way to i don't do that that's racist i agree
100 why are you going so far out of your way yeah you're going far out of your way alec ball went
oh shit do you consider yourself african-american no i'm black you're black thank you i consider
you black too me too black and puerto rican you know i mean because i'm a little more yeah
what do i consider you black
what do i consider you brown that is true that is also true do me do me i love you in the nutcracker music
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Now let's get back to the show.
Okay, guys, seriously, let's address the elephant in the room.
NBA young boy dude is wallin'.
Huh?
young boy dude is wildin
huh
you really
start sentences
but I don't know
where the fuck
that shit
going
yo
young boy's
wildin bro
on clubhouse
you know what I'm
saying
I'm so hit
dude
I don't know
he was
hey he's on
clubhouse
right
he was on
clubhouse
and then
y'all mayweather
was in there.
You didn't see that shit?
And she was stalking him.
You know what I mean?
That was crazy, too, man.
That was wild.
He was wilding on that.
Yeah.
Yeah, young boy.
Free young boy.
I'm hip, guys.
I'm hip.
I don't know about y'all, but I'm hip.
That's like six months ago.
Yes, bro.
He's on Black People's Time with that story.
I am.
I'm a little CPT. That's how hip that story. I am. I'm a little CPT, bro.
That's how hip he is.
I am.
You on Black Planet?
I am on Black Planet.
Okay, you hip.
Still.
I'm hip.
I'm hip.
I got this shit.
I know about NBA Youngboy.
Well, he got free.
He's on house arrest.
You heard about Outkast?
Yes.
They make good music?
They do, bro.
Yo, I'll catch fire, but that's some old shit, fam.
Like, you got to get on this new shit.
What's the newest rap song?
Oh, yes, it's good.
The newest rap song I know?
His Spotify on raps was drag.
My shit was straight bangers, bro.
This motherfucker is Olivia Rodrigo.
That's it.
This motherfucker is in Olivia Rodrigo. That's it. I have that shit, too. I have thaters, bro. This motherfucker is Olivia Rodrigo. That's it. This motherfucker is Olivia Rodrigo.
That's it.
And I'm probably responsible
for the plays on his.
I was like,
Mark,
put that little Spanish bitch on.
Put that little Spanish bitch
always sad for no reason on.
The her.
The her.
She got fat tits
for her birthday.
She did get that.
She did.
You know what I'm saying?
It's no big deal.
I'm two decades older.
You got that tit still.
Do you know what I'm saying?
Your boy about to be married.
You can't joke like this
when you're married.
You can't joke like this.
I know.
That's why I got to get out
my system now.
You know what I'm saying?
You got to purge.
I got to purge. The purge, purge purge purge the purge the word i learned that from young boy
i learned that young boy's like dude that guy's a legend bro he's the one dude he's so sick yeah
that's my hero yeah motherfucker sick dude yeah he's the best yeah motherfucker's sick
he's free his forehead looked like he was DP in an Alec Baldwin movie.
That motherfucker is sick.
What happened to his forehead?
We got to talk about that on Clubhouse.
No one want to bring that up?
He's going to slide on you.
Is he going to slide on me?
Little old me.
These are the bullying.
He said he's getting bullied.
That's why he wants to step away from the rap game.
Get out of here.
Why is he getting bullied?
You know, just all the comments.
He don't want to deal with it no more.
What is he getting bullied for?
They're talking about his forehead, bro.
Nah.
It's a five.
And what do you think of that?
But what is going on?
He obviously experienced some sort of trauma as a young boy.
Playing in the nba no but what do you think has caused that do you know i i don't know you would know
because you up on it so you tell me yeah do you know where he's from do you guys know where he's
from tell me do you guys know where he's from? Yeah. Yeah. Obviously. Obviously, I know.
Well, you know, obviously.
But what about y'all?
Y'all don't know much about music.
Come on.
Where's NBA Youngboy from?
Of course I know. Where's he from?
Don't point that at me.
Don't point that at me, son.
Don't cock the hammer.
Don't cock the hammer.
Don't cock the hammer.
Where's he from?
He's cocking the hammer, son.
You better tell me where he's from, son.
All right, fine.
All right.
Google that shit.
I know where he's from.
Where's he from? Baton Rouge, Louisiana. Damn right, Google that shit. I know where he's from. Where's he from?
Baton Rouge, Louisiana.
Damn right.
That's Louisiana.
The Lou.
The Lou.
Yo, I heard a wild conspiracy.
I'm not on camera.
You can't see that I Googled that.
You got that shit.
Go look at hotels or something, bro.
Yeah, come on, dog.
Your chair's getting bigger every week.
Is that because you're a fat fuck?
Is that why?
This piece of shit?
What an asshole that guy is, right?
He feels so bad that he didn't give you a plus one.
It's okay.
It's okay.
It's okay.
It's okay.
I did give you a plus one.
I mean, you ruined my weekend.
It's okay.
It's okay.
Yeah, the plus one, you honestly don't deserve.
And you broke his Achilles.
Yeah, I did.
Miles wants his plus one.
Miles, you don't get no plus one either.
Wait, who are you inviting?
Who are you inviting?
Stop.
I want a plus one. Who are you inviting? Who are you inviting? I want a plus one.
Who are you inviting?
Who are you inviting?
You met her.
I did?
Which one?
At a show, at your show.
Which one?
We were in the Midwest.
St. Louis.
Hey, that bitch want a plus one so she can buy another ticket.
Get out of here.
The girl that came to the St. Louis show?
That's your girl, though?
That's your girl for real?
Or you guys are dating?
Nah, we're trying. I'm trying.
We're trying to make it happen.
You know what? He said we're trying.
I don't want the plus one.
Oh, shit.
I don't want it. I don't think any of us will have it.
We'll have a good brotherly weekend that weekend.
Oh, you're taking it away from me?
Yep.
What?
You gotta see this girl.
No, this girl. Remember we talk about Miles Tens?
What is this one?
What is this one?
Miles what?
What is this? What is this for Miles this for miles this is literally honestly like 25
i mean this seriously yes this is beyond his dream girl his dream girl is is more regs
this girl is beyond let's go remember he knows how good we can make him look
you're such a sweet kid he He didn't even try to fuck.
And the rest of us were like.
What the fuck?
Vala was balls deep in a Croatian girl.
Someone else lost his plus one too.
What?
What?
What?
Vala, what?
That was past tense, bro.
We're talking past tense.
Yeah, this is back in the day. You used to fuck girls back in the day, dude.? That was past tense, bro. We're talking past tense. Yeah, this is back in the day.
You used to fuck girls back in the day, dude.
You used to fuck girls, bro.
I know.
And then we've stopped that.
But back in the day, you remember, that guy was a killer.
Yeah.
You know what I'm saying?
Walked on stage.
Yeah.
You remember that?
Yeah, I heard about that.
It was unbelievable, bro.
I heard about that.
I heard he was getting better at girls than Dove.
And more often.
I'm a broken man, guys. Yes. You all, bro. I already was getting better at girls and dove. And more often. I'm a broken man, guys.
Yes.
You all.
Better.
Everyone.
Have plus ones.
Come on.
Go.
Damn.
Damn.
Yes, you get it.
Whatever y'all need.
Why are you giving away plus ones at Andy's wedding, yo?
I'm a rabbi.
I can bequeath pluses.
You can, actually.
100%.
Okay.
We've almost done an hour of this podcast.
I think we should obviously address the elephant in the room.
It's enough jokes.
Ridiculous.
Three, six mafia and bone thugs in harmony.
They got into a fight during their verses.
Busy bone.
Busy.
Yeah. What do you think about that? He's schizophrenic or some shit like that he's got like some mental health issues oh no so he came on
stage and was just like stop making fun of me or don't make fun of me or some shit like that
and then he just threw a fucking bottle of whatever at the at three six and then that was it no no
somebody for three six said suck my dick oh that's what it was and that is you're right
you're right we've seen that on this podcast yeah yeah that shit that's what it was. And that is fighting. We've seen that on this podcast.
I told you, son.
That shit, that's a fight starter.
Now, it's funny because he got so offended by it,
but he doesn't necessarily throw like a man.
He threw like he sucked dicks.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's what I'm saying.
I think that's what you're trying to say.
That's what I'm trying to say.
He did dick sucking toss.
But rappers are known for not being able to throw objects,
like 50, throwing a baseball and shit like that.
We're not throwers.
Pat Stay, shouts to Pat Stay, had a still shot of how busy bone wound up and it's so
fucking embarrassing what he did he did this shit yeah yeah like this yeah not like you're not all
the way back but like halfway like that it's a fucking rough one dude yeah it's a rough one
it's a shame man i really liked uh Six Mafia and also Bone Thugs-N-Harmony.
That's our age group.
You didn't like them.
It's Bone and Biggie, Biggie.
It's Bone and Biggie, Biggie.
It's Bone and Biggie, Biggie.
It's Bone and Biggie, Biggie.
Let's ride, let's ride, let's ride, let's ride.
Get high, get high, get high.
Armed and dangerous.
Ain't no one that can bang with us.
Straight up, we no age with us.
Label us notorious. Thug ass. Bust a stranger. Straight up weed, no age with us. Label us notorious.
Thug ass.
Thug ass.
Bust a stranger.
Us, y'all niggas be gambling.
Scambling.
And restaurants with mandolins and violins.
We just sitting here trying to win, trying not to sin.
Too much smoke, need oxygen.
Settling, counting them Benjamins.
Nah, you fucked it.
I fucked it.
High off weed, not oxygen.
What is it?
High off weed and oxygen.
Damn, bro.
I almost had that shit, too.
I got a couple songs in the Rolodex, bro.
I got an NBA Youngboy song that's fire.
Oh, shit.
Hit it.
Hit it.
You want me to do the NBA Youngboy?
No, you don't.
You don't want me to do that.
We not ready?
Yeah, not ready.
Maybe later on the podcast.
I bet.
Maybe later on the podcast.
Can we go?
In all seriousness, though, Chris Cu um is officially fired from cnn yeah
they did an internal investigation and they thought that what he was doing was inappropriate
and helping his uh brother and giving his brother information about his brother's accusers and
they're like you gots to go yeah now uh do you think this is the first time that chris cuomo has used
his uh journalist uh journalist connections to help his brother no it'd be weird if it was the
first time no if there this never happened before he never helped his brother didn't use any of his
connections at all didn't use any of his ability to get uh information to help his brother yeah
you're right i just hate all of us acting
like we wouldn't do the same shit oh no no thank you i'm glad you said it my issue isn't my issue
is like we know that we would so you can't let that them both have those jobs okay that's fair
so you know i'm saying like you i don't know if you could hide if you're a news network
right i don't know if i can get unbiased news from a guy who's
supposed to be covering his own brother so cnn is the real that's on cnn yeah like they should
have handled that before or said you can never cover your brother or this kind of stuff and
seven eleven and play fucking family feud yeah on zoom every single fucking day during the pandemic
so because i i'm supposed to at least in america think that the news can criticize the government
right you go to a place like russia russia is basically telling the news what to say yeah and we're supposed to be so
different we're like there's no way the government could have connections with these news agencies
there's no way that the government could telling these new tell these news agencies to push certain
narratives right and now you see it and you're like holy shit of course it's happening yeah i
mean if we didn't already have such little respect for CNN, it should have completely
bottomed out right here.
I think the people who are surprised by this are idiots.
Like, this is CNN.
Do you think they're the news network?
No.
They're MSNBC a little bit more centered.
Slightly.
Like, very slightly.
Yeah.
So, of course, they're going to use their fucking, they're going to be just as corrupt
as any other news organization.
Even not mainstream people, if it's family, I would think they're going to do whatever the fuck they got going to be just as corrupt as any other news organization. Even not mainstream people, if it's family,
I would think they're going to do
whatever the fuck they got to do
to help out their family.
Yeah.
If Alex Jones had a brother
in legal trouble,
I'd be like,
he'll do whatever he got to do
to get his brother out of legal trouble.
This is the most likable he's been.
Yes.
Like the fact that he did this,
it made him likeable.
I'm a fan.
I'm a fan.
I'm a fan of this guy.
That's a good ass brother, dog.
Yeah.
We all got a piece of shit relative.
Sometimes we got to help him out. We don't want to. don't wanna yeah for him unfortunately it's his brother and he'll help
him out good man what an idiot to get caught like he was doing it on like company emails or something
like that yeah yeah what a fucking idiot that's true or is that arrogance or is there like there's
no way in hell they would fire me definitely arrogance yeah you got the number one show
i heard the ratings went up since he left really yeah saga posted that oh shit maybe short term we'll see how long has he been off
there's a void after you left that's right now there's people want to get a new guy and then it
goes back yeah yeah yeah yeah i'm just like it's just so funny to see that family completely fall
apart it really is like it's over for the cuomos yeah and they were like a dynasty i think
people don't understand there's like i don't you gotta explain this andrew's dad was the governor
when we were younger yeah mario cuomo right yeah bridges after yeah it's like this was an
institution this is a political dynasty they're gonna be good who's the new one i bet you they
come back so rebrand rebrand mar. Mario Brothers. Kill that shit.
Oh.
The Mario Brothers will be fire.
Mario Brothers.
Mario Brothers will be fire.
I mispronounced it.
You also just mispronounced it.
How is it pronounced?
Mario.
It's-a me.
Mario.
Yeah.
New Yorkers say Mario for no reason.
I say Mario Brothers.
Yeah.
Mario.
It makes no sense.
Mario.
You're not pronouncing it right.
Mario Mario
You're not pronouncing it right
Why do you just pronounce the A
In an Italian accent and every other letter you don't
Because that's how the game says it
Because you Japanese people say that
Yeah we're going to trust in fucking Japanese's
Mario yeah
Can we say them those people
Can we say those people
Can we call Japanese those people
I think it's call them them people.
Them people.
They people.
Oh, shit.
They them.
You can.
Yeah.
I can call trans they them.
These people.
Holy fuck.
Do I have to call one person?
Like if Demi Lovato is in the room, do I have to be like, does these people like some coffee
before the show?
They person.
Do they like coffee? Do they like does do do they like coffee because they like
coffee do they like coffee use guys do you want coffee do you guys want coffee during the show
is that like a philadelphia trans
how do you guys take your coffee you guys want some water or
fuck so just you works yeah you could just call them you yeah you can say you yeah really but
that seems fucked up because it's they them is you you can't they're multiple yeah you is singular
so you only you're only identifying one of their spirits you fucking yeah big monster
you're a bigot you're a bigot you're a bigot dude because you're not acknowledging both her
both their spirits she's not just female bro yeah she's a guy too yeah they're they're a bigot. You're a bigot, dude. Because? You're not acknowledging both their spirits. She's not just female, bro.
She's a guy, too.
Yeah, they're a guy.
She's a fucking guy.
Okay?
She's a fucking man, and you're going to respect it.
All right?
This lady is a fucking dude, and you're going to put some respect on it.
Okay?
Inside, she's a guy.
Okay?
You put your dick in there, you'll know.
You'll get up in there, you'll be like, there's some fucking fella in here. she's a guy. Okay? You put your dick in there, you'll know. You get up in there,
you be like, there's some fucking fella in here. I feel a fella.
Just some, though. Just some, dude.
He says she so many times.
They. She.
She's a guy.
He's acknowledging both, at least.
She's a guy, too.
In Italian, we would say,
animale.
What? What?
What?
Why?
Why?
Why? Why are we talking about this?
Every hour on the album
These people
What is happening?
Why?
Why?
Why?
Why?
Why?
Why?
Why?
I meet this girl
She has pink hair Ar armpits hair, coming to me.
She says, I am.
What does she say?
She says, oh, my pronouns.
He, her, them, potato, potato, tomato, tomato. Yes. Yes, correct. They, them. They, them. They, correct.
They, them.
They're they, them.
They, them.
They're they, them.
Yeah, sorry.
I had to snap out of that one.
Sorry about that.
But maybe that's how I identify.
Son.
Yeah.
I'm Italian, dude.
Yeah.
I'm an Italian guy.
Yeah.
There's nothing wrong with that.
So is it Mario or Mario?
Mario.
What?
Is it Mario or Mario? I think What? Is it Mario or Mario?
I think it's Maricon.
Okay.
I think the actual pronunciation.
I understand that.
I finally understand.
I think it's Maricon.
I think that's it.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, okay.
Why are you sucking on mushrooms all day?
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
You got something to tell us?
You know what I mean?
Shooting out fireballs out of your ass? Yeah, that's true's true yeah but they don't come out of the
ass yeah i played that version yeah which one does he does he picks it from here and then
throws him you didn't notice how's he get flaming from i got it all right
that was good you just thought of that in the moment
that was good you just covered up your little bullshit with that right there in the
moment that was fucking impressive i'm not gonna lie because he does kind of take it from his
pockets yeah you know what i'm saying you fucking stop calling my friend then
why why why yeah you fucking... Get your notes down, Miles.
Get your fucking notes down, okay?
Make sure you take those goddamn notes.
You know what I'm saying, Chifty?
You little motherfucker.
You know, alright.
Can we honestly...
Can we talk about what?
What?
Can we address the elephant in the room?
Yes.
Fine.
Don't pull out your pee-pee.
Should I fucking pull it out?
Don't pull out your pee-pee.
I'm about to pull it out and stuff it in a waifu.
This is brought to you by gamers.
But in all seriousness, guys.
You want to talk about the crime wave in LA?
Thank God.
Yeah.
Thank God.
Finally, we got to it.
Thank the Lord. Yeah. What is happening? talking about the crime wave in la thank god yeah yeah thank god finally we got to it thank the lord
yeah what is happening apparently just crime is up in la why i'm is up in la mark why is crime so up
dude why is crime so up dude hold on keep going keep going take that truck out why is crime so up
dude i no one really knows some
people are saying that gaston is that his name gaston gascon gascon you're talking about the
fucking bad guy in beauty and the beast he's about to be gassed on so some people are saying
that gaston is uh george gascon is trying to let all the people out so wait a minute
but what is he exactly saying? Because I don't understand.
Basically, the people are getting released from prison with violence. And they're just robbing places?
Yeah, yeah.
And what is Gaston doing?
He's telling them to do that?
Is he like, be my guest?
Yeah.
What is his exact philosophy?
I haven't asked him.
I don't know.
You haven't asked him?
There's not a public word on that.
And why are people robbing so much in Los Angeles?
Because not being prosecuted is harsh.
Is that the reason?
That's what some people are suggesting.
Or is that what you suggest, you right-wing liberal cuck?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You are kind of a right-wing liberal cuck.
You are a right-wing liberal fucking cuck. You're a right wing liberal fucking cuck.
Wait, why?
Mark, you're going to let them talk to you like that?
Why?
I'm curious.
What did I do?
You did a lot of things, Mark.
You know what the fuck you did.
Don't make me go through this again.
It's like every few months I got to tell you what a right wing liberal fucking cuck you are.
You're a right wing liberal cuck.
White ring liberal cuck?
I'm a white ring liberal cuck? You think I'm a white ring liberal cuck white ring liberal cuck i'm a white ring liberal cuck yeah you think i'm
a white ring liberal cuck you look at me right now in the eyes after not showering for four
days minimum i'm wearing the same thing for three of those four days and call me a right wing
liberal white white ring oh white ring he was right is he you're a ripe wing liberal cuck
that's part of the liberal cuck uh-huh but you're white what are you gonna get in two weeks
a ring
and your liberal cuck
do the math
damn
do the math
carry the one
you know
that's cool
that's cool
that was big time
read this
that was big time
that's cool
that was big time
I went full
memph bleak
on that one
right there
that bar was
mid and best.
I don't hype that shit.
To the fucking move.
Put back on the fucking headphones.
We're not having this audio mess up the first day Alex gets back.
We're not having that happen.
Keep the fucking headphones on my ears.
Please, don't fuck up the audio.
Okay, I'm stopping.
All right, we honestly should start the pod.
We need a story.
We need a fucking story.
The crime wave?
Please talk about the crime wave.
Okay, so people are saying it's like liberal policies that are making the crime skyrocket.
21.5% it increased.
Yeah.
Houston crime has increased 30%.
Can I ask you a question?
Yeah.
From what year to what year?
Last year to this year.
Well, last year, of course.
Nobody was outside.
How are you going to commit crimes if you're not outside?
Great ass point.
That's a good ass point.
New York violent crime, I'm talking about violent crime only.
Violent crime is down 46% in New York last year to this year.
So it's down.
Down in New York. So they're saying it's these liberal cities.ent crime is down 46% in New York last year to this year. So it's down. Down in New York.
So they're saying
it's these liberal cities.
New York is down.
LA is up,
but not as much as Houston
where it's fucking
have your own gun.
You don't even need a permit.
Just buy one
and shoot whoever
the fuck you want to.
Crime is up more.
So maybe
conservatives can stop
being such pussies.
Oh, shit.
And cry babies
about a little bit of crime.
Seth Rogen is kind of right, Logan. Oh, shit. And cry babies about a little bit of crime. Seth Rogen is kind of right,
Logan.
Oh, shit.
Hey, it's called
living in this big city,
you cucks.
All right.
You fucking cucks.
Country mouse?
You want to call him
country mouse?
Yeah, you want country mouse
in a big city?
Country mouse?
Country mouse in a big city?
Yeah.
What's a city mouse?
Eh.
Williamsburg. All right right but 2019 to 2021 la homicides up 47 percent that ain't shooting victims up 51 percent big deal weirdly like the robberies and everything that people are talking
about statistically not super increased but it's super visible all of the flash mob robberies and it's happening from
again another reform is uh elimination of cash bail these guys get in get out yeah that blah
blah so but the other thing i was wondering if it's like um i wonder if it the narrative gets set
and then when you see anybody rob anything it just makes the news. But now it justifies our fear.
Yeah.
Right?
So the narrative is set.
And the narrative is right now in LA, people are robbing.
Now, it's not like people just started robbing in LA.
Yeah.
People have been robbing in LA.
Been robbing.
The most famous gangs ever started in LA.
Right?
Right.
What were they doing before 2021?
I don't know.
Good Samaritans, I guess.
Exactly.
Mm-hmm. they continue that shit the
marathon yeah you're right continues yeah people are gonna take that in different ways for different
people you know what i mean you know what i'm saying like different people taking different
ways if you're the race you're running is busting open louis vuitton and snatching purses and shit
that marathon continues bro you're right You know what I'm saying?
So, go. I would say, to Dove,
I bet if you look across any city,
2019 to 21, crime is
way the fuck up in any big city.
Because it's just, that's what happened. We all had
the fucking pandemic. We all got let out.
We've been inside for nine months. People with mental
illness didn't fucking interact with anybody.
Didn't get to be normal. I bet crime way up
everywhere. Stop being a little bitch about it whoa living in a big city dove yo
holy shit right now holy shit right now i'm just saying i like what's happening though you know
why oh why property value going down all this shit goes public the hammer is gonna come down
double hard yeah soon and property a little bit go down a little bit. Hey, real talk on that.
We need a little opportunity to get back in there.
Son, I think that you make a great point.
I think that...
We do that sometimes.
You make an absolutely great point.
I think that Seth is being positioned as the new Chrissy Teigen.
I think that it's tricky because when anybody gets robbed, you kind of want empathy instead of figure it out.
Yeah.
So maybe it wasn't the right time to say that shit.
It's called living in the big city.
It's kind of like annoying.
Anything bad happens to you, you don't need a motherfucker going like, this is what it is.
Yeah.
But he's opening himself up for so much possible criticism, right, from a group that cannot wait for a new figurehead to criticize.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They took down Chrissy,
they need somebody else.
Chrissy's out of here
and Seth is rolling right into it
and the problem is,
his community is bigging him up like crazy,
so he thinks he's doing the right thing.
Yeah.
Everybody that believes in the same shit
he believes is going,
yo, you're the man,
you thank you so much for sharing that,
you should have shared it.
Like, I think I remember when,
remember he was at like some award show or some shit, remember remember and he was like should should any of us even be here
it was talking about like social distancing or something like that was it the emmys i don't know
he basically called him out and i'm sure he got tons of positive feedback for calling him out
and if you're an entertainer you gravitate to positive feedback yeah you almost can't
not do it it's really really crazy. Us included.
Us 100%. We're guilty of that shit.
Absolutely.
So it's like,
if you get rewarded for something,
you have to be incredibly disciplined
in the things that you want to create
to not continue to gravitate towards that.
I mean, this guy knows how to make movies.
Not only an actor,
but he actually makes,
produces, writes films.
That's what he's known for.
He's not known for being
a fucking Twitter celebrity.
And he's going to start being known for that know and it's starting to affect his shit yeah he put out that fucking uh santa inc yeah so he put out a like a claymation movie
santa inc with him and sarah silverman to be fair also hated uh but it has the lowest ratings ever
on imdb and i think rotten tomatoes 1.1 out of 10 on imdb and a three percent on rotten tomatoes
yeah and then instead of just being like hey maybe this thing sucks uh he just blamed white
supremacy on twitter so so he had this tweet where he was like so it looks like uh thousands
of white supremacists uh went on imdb and like uh tomato whatever that thing is called rotten
tomatoes and like uh downvoted our movie blah blah. Now here's the tricky thing about this.
You don't have to call them white supremacists.
You're calling them white supremacists because they disagree with you and it's easier to label the people who disagree with you
as the worst possible thing.
You could come out and say like,
there are people that hate me for whatever reason
and they wanted to act in a group to make this project that we put out look bad
and they went and did that.
The second you
label them as the worst possible thing now you lose the credibility of an honest reaction to
something that happens yeah every single one of those people it wasn't someone who's just like a
conservative dude that's kind of annoying that you're telling people how to live yeah i also
saw the trailer it doesn't look good but but maybe it's not what What I'm trying to give him the benefit of the doubt for his creative.
I'm like, maybe it's pretty good.
And there's a group of people that hate you.
But to label every single one as either a Nazi or white supremacist.
Didn't we just learn this from the Trump era?
You label these people as one thing.
I mean, he learned it from the Trump era because that should be working.
On his part?
Like, for people who use that strategy.
Oh, so that's going be individually yeah oh so you
think he's doing just to charge up his charge up his people it's like oh if you don't like this
movie you racist but don't we hate that ultimatum like not far left that's a bar it's not far you
mean if you don't like this podcast you're a racist yeah oh shit i see how it works now
fuck we should have been going with that every every
we've been trying to actually create a down vote is an m word yeah yeah whoa yeah yo so
apparently they think people are upset that it's a christmas movie made by people who are like
mainly jewish aren't christians allowed to be upset if you made a diwali movie and it was a
bunch of fucking christians making it i'd be like yo that's weird i would agree with you but every christmas song is made by a jew
yeah but that shit slaps those go hard and this well the whole point of this movie is also also
the dumbest fucking woke shit ever is why to say like there's a lineage of santas and it's always
a white male and then sarah silverman is this like fucking purple elf who's like i'm gonna be the new
santa all right guys we're gonna take a break for a second because everybody is trying
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with my bookie now let's get back to the show that other comment she made that like you're
jew washing you have to be a jew to play it you like no actors act also let them play what's wrong
is that a problem if white dudes want to be the
most charitable figure in all the folklore the guy that goes around and gives christmas gifts
to every kid you don't want white kids to aspire to be that not every you woke yourself into a
fucking pretzel goofy bitch goofy bitch a goofy ass bitch and instead of getting a black girl to
be the role she's like well just make me purple i'll be a purple elf when she's the actual purple
she's like a purple fucking person yeah she looks like the count like the same color as
the count that's her was she the armor on that alec baldwin is that rust was she the girl that
killed everybody on rust is that what happens was that the first plus call thank you now here's the
thing sarah silverman seth rogan is it possible that they live in their own vacuum yes and because
of this they're not even seeing the criticism yeah i think they believe i think he believes
it's like fucking anti-semitism oh do they genuinely believe that i think he does and also
that is an interesting question like if you're jewish like can you make a movie about christmas
and we're all about not culturally appropriating.
I mean, but also Christmas is like American cultural holiday.
Like, it's religious in its undertones, but like Santa's not religious.
I agree.
It became a cultural thing.
Yes.
And we have a lot of FOMO about it.
And it's not about Jesus.
It's about Santa.
Yeah.
If it's about Jesus, then it's like, all right.
But also Jesus is Jewish.
That's true.
That is true. But yeah, that is Jewish. That's true. That is true.
But yeah, that is true.
Also, in general, good luck making a movie without a couple Jews being in it.
It's just part of the game.
Yeah, 100%.
So if you're going to make a good movie that's representative of what it is, then who gives a shit who's doing it?
But that, yeah, that is interesting.
But Jews actively don't celebrate Christmas.
There's a difference between a cultural holiday and a religious holiday yeah and christmas has become
a cultural holiday which is what i would imagine christians want yeah yeah you're too prolific if
yeah it's like if you want to spread your religion your values in this new land that you've inhabited
you want people to think your things are awesome i.e a big holiday to celebrate the what
is it when he was born right yeah yeah to celebrate the born day you want people of other religions to
go yo this holiday slaps so hard i gotta celebrate it as well yeah right like i would imagine there's
a culture war that's going on there and you're winning it if people want to put a fucking
christmas tree in their house even though they're not christian yeah that's true that's step one yeah yeah it's like that's the issue with hanukkah
is like it's one present a day but also the presents aren't that good yeah all my jewish
friends didn't really get that great i didn't get one gift not one from from whom everyone in your
life not one for a member not from you just cole you just ended my romantic weekend
yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah you got a christmas gift say it into the mic
miles say that shit into the motherfucking mic again dove how old are you damn dog he said it
twice wow he said it twice wow do all of you get christmas presents wow yeah you do wow
that was good comeback wow
and then miles just went right back to work right back to work headphones
oh okay um here's an interesting story somebody's got to break this shit down because
i didn't read it but uh but the headline was fire there was a couple in san francisco black couple
yeah they got their home appraised for uh nine hundred thousand dollars yeah they removed
themselves yeah from so they got the house appraised
they got offered for $900,000
which they thought was low relative to the county
they're in Marin County in San Francisco
Marin, who gives a fuck
so then they had their white friend
they went to a different appraisal company
and told their white friend put it in your name
they removed themselves completely from the property
took the pictures of themselves and their family away from the property.
Took them all down.
So they basically whitewashed the whole property.
The appraisal went from $900,000 to $1.4 million, which is in line with the county average.
But $500,000 in what's supposed to be a real progressive city.
Supposed to be a real haven for progress.
Marin is outside of San Francisco.
How far outside?
Far enough where it's like you'd want to not deal with any of that progressive shit.
Oh, really?
Imagine like Long Island.
Okay.
Yeah.
So imagine Long Island is not necessarily like the last bastion of progressivism in the East Coast.
Right, right, right.
But Williamsburg might be.
Okay.
So that's
how i would look at it but still it's it's really interesting man like there's also another thing
everybody's making this about race maybe they were just fucking ugly like maybe these people
are so disgusting but then that's attractive privilege and that we know exists yeah yeah
and that's fucked up and also who is this new guy that moved in the house is this new guy famous
no it's just the appraisal right but the new guy's pictures are in the house is this new guy famous no it's just the appraisal right but the new guy's pictures
are in the house so oh i don't know if they put up new pictures from what i read they didn't they
just they didn't put up pictures of the new family family pictures in the house no there's just no
pictures they just took all the pictures down yeah so maybe they have horrible pictures maybe
these people don't know how to put pictures up and then make sure what they look like if we can
find out what they look like five hundred,000? You gotta be ugly as fuck
to drop the value
500,000 dollars.
Or they just put the pictures
in bad places
in the appraisers.
Was it the same?
No, it can't be the same.
You know what they say
when an ugly person
moves into your neighborhood
everybody just leaves.
100%.
All the white people just leave.
100%.
I've heard this for a while.
This has happened over and over
and we did a study in college
where they did the same thing
and they pointed this out.
And I think it's worth offering this as a service.
So, as white people, we can go fake own your homes.
Yeah, if you're a black person or a person of color in America
and you want to get a higher appraisal,
I will come in and I will be there to show the person your home
and I'll just collect a small fee.
We're trying to make the guy go up.
Yeah, come on.
Yeah.
It looks like a flat to shower.
That's trendy. That's cool. Or make sure if you are buying a home you buy from
a black family wait me oh yeah that's the real black friday that right there yeah my house get
yourself a fucking deal yeah that's a good point yo that is kind of crazy yeah we try or if you're
a black person go white face 100 you got to go white face. 100%, you got to go white face.
Yeah.
100%.
But you know what's crazy about this?
Like, this is really fucked up.
This is where, you know, they talk about like institutional racism and how like racism is
baked in.
Because think about specifically the loan that you get to purchase a home is based on
the appraised value of that home.
Yeah.
Right?
So it's like by a black person just being in the home,
it's reducing the value of it
and then making,
well, I guess it's making it more affordable
for another person to buy.
Yeah, but that person would have to be black
for it to even out.
For it to even out.
Exactly.
But then it effectively reduces
a black family's ability
to gain wealth in the same way.
Yes.
So they're missing out on $500,000 simply because they're black.
It's like a modern day redlining.
Like they can't keep you out of the neighborhood, but you can make less just being there.
This is that critical race theory shit, bro.
It ties into something like this, right?
It's like how race is intersectional and the way that
affects all these things in life yeah is not specifically like i'm gonna be rude to that guy
because he's black right it's there might be a praise of the winner that doesn't think he's racist
yeah and he's in there appraising the house with racist undertones without even fucking realizing
talk ish white face liberal cut i love it walks in, that shit smells like jerk chicken everywhere.
He's like, that's going to blow on the walls.
Yeah, that's true.
Y'all be jerking chicken, bro.
That's on y'all.
Jerking chicken's not worth 500K, bro.
Honestly, I would pay more for a house that smells good.
I think this is cap.
I need to see the fucking house.
This is a fake story.
This is a fake story.
Our food slaps, bro.
Can you imagine a house smelling like fucking Hamburger Helper?
Get out of here.
I think a house on my Blackfield is probably cleaner, honestly.
100% cleaner.
All black people I know, they shower before they go to bed.
That shit is crazy.
And they wash their ass in the shower.
It's super weird.
I don't wash my ass in the shower.
I'll pick toilet paper out of your own thing.
I do my groin a little bit with the hand.
I just cup some of the i cup some
of the soap suds from my pubes and then i just splash it against my taint and i pick the toilet
paper out of my butt okay so that's yeah if you're listening to this and trying to appraise
andrew's apartment yeah how much would it be worth now a little appraisal cuck
no but in all seriousness there's no fucking way i can't believe that this is real i can believe
like maybe a hundred thousand but not five hundred well i'm curious the thing time is off i'm pretty
confident like this has happened before and i've seen other stuff yeah there's been other wall
streets but i'm curious like one third of the value of the home if you have two different appraisers
how different that's that was the one it's different appraisal companies so that might
affect it some also how uh soon was this done last one to the new one i don't think there was much
very true because it could have been a long time they could have the market went crazy
the value could have maybe it was a black appraiser the second time or the first or the
first time also ain't nobody buying this black shit he probably was walking around like
in all seriousness i think what could happen is if there was a long time i don't know the race of the appraisal but in all seriousness i think what could happen is if
there was a long time i don't know how much time was done you know the rental market went crazy
like pre-pandemic to during the pandemic like people want to move out of the city they want
to go to like live in homes with some land or whatever yeah and uh prices for homes went
fucking nuts i mean when we were down in miami it was unreal so maybe the market what's up
one month that's crazy something was one month one month that's
crazy something's off here yo that that's something's off here yeah crazy month yeah
crazy month went up 500 000 yeah well what were they given the amount it was it a crypto or
something like that were they given the amount of crypto maybe it was a crypto appraisal uh-huh
and crypto tumbled lately so now they gotta find this guy who did the appraisal and fire him.
Yeah, that's fucked up.
But which guy's wrong?
There's the interesting thing.
Is the 1.4 fucked up or is the 900 fucked up?
Yeah, but if you're suing, you're going to sue the 900,000 company.
Hell yeah.
You're going to say there's obviously some credence to the fact that it's worth a half a million dollars.
A half a million dollars is fucking crazy.
All right, but it could be racist the other way. I'm overrate this house it's a nine hundred thousand dollar house yeah but
because they're black i'm gonna overrate it oh no because it was white people i'm gonna overrate it
yeah which is still racist yeah but not as fucked up because the first one was true in value yeah
and the second one was just like oh i'm gonna give you extra points because you like yeah
and i'm pretty sure that institution is fucked up in general just appraisers because it's like
yeah i can get you a whole lot of money if i come through and inspect that's a fire job
that's a gotta be correct something's off right because it's almost like the restaurant dudes
that come and see like if you have to code and shit like that yo just line me a little something
i'll give you a we got to become appraisers 100 but like to put that much power there has to be like systems
or something like that in order to grade right like it's supposed to be like checklists and all
that there must be yeah like checking the foundation all this stuff like the walls i
guess competition is the checks and balance you just go to another one of the biggest things
ah you get multiple appraisals. No, neighborhood comps.
That's the other thing.
So the $1.4 million they were saying was in line for Marin County.
That's how you say it, right?
And then $900,000 was clearly below property value.
That's why they were like, let's get the second appraisal.
It's usually like a per square foot price, and then there's a range,
and then you get a little bit more specific on the quality,
what's on the market, blah, blah, blah.
Sums up. They need to figure that out i mean that should be a lawsuit yeah i mean it is i think they're suing they are suing
yeah good we got to find out who this person is how often do like do you get your place appraised
by more than one institution often i don't know i've never sold a house no right i don't know so
it would be common practice to just get it appraised once,
and then you would just go with that,
and then lose out on $500,000?
I assume you're going to get it done a couple times.
I mean, that person should be put in jail.
You potentially could have stole $500,000 from it.
Yeah, that's theft.
Whoa.
Yeah, I don't know if it gets done multiple times, though,
because you are paying for that.
That's part of like-
Yeah, that's their hustle yeah
motherfuckers anyway you want to talk about jake paul tommy sure oh my god yes this is crazy
the elephant in the room we should talk about the elephant in the room too before we finish the pod
we should wait in the whole pod to bring this up what everybody has been waiting for us to address
um jake paul and tommy fury many of you guys already know this right by now but
their fight is off yeah what happened tommy fury pulled out he said he broke a rib and he had uh
some other like health issue and so jake paul on december 18th my wedding night is going to be
fighting tyron woodley for the second time and said he's giving
him a five hundred thousand dollar bonus if tyron woodley knocks him out now i think he's doing that
because there was rumors swirling around i think our boy dylan danis might have started these
rumors that it was in the contract that tyron couldn't knock out jake so he might be trying to
dispel that rumor.
Or he might just be like, I'm going to pay $500,000 for motherfuckers to talk about that shit.
And now Tyron is taking this on less than two weeks notice.
Yeah.
If we believe everything at face value.
Yeah.
If we believe that this wasn't the plan the whole time.
But why would Tommy Fury agree to that?
Because he fights him later on,
and it just hypes that fight with Tommy Fury even more.
I guess, dude.
Now, he takes a little bit of a hit initially,
but it gets bigger as it goes on.
Now, there's also a situation where Tommy Fury's family,
I think his pops,
was calling out Jake for not wanting to take the USADA testing.
So maybe he broke his rib, but maybe they're really like,
I'm not going to have him fight this guy if he's not willing to get tested
and he could potentially be on roids, et cetera.
Why would they just say that, though?
That's the best movie to be like, yo, this guy's not agreeing to do steroids.
It looks pussy, bro.
Like, you shouldn't care if a YouTube guy is doing steroids.
Nah, you got to care.
Now you should care because the kid can box but if
they're gonna take this whole position like he can't box he's just from youtube he's nothing
i'm gonna go out there i'm gonna lay him flat out and now you're like but i want even rules
i want testing i don't want to want performance enhancing drugs it's like oh you scared just
fight yeah but just fight fair that's what i'd be like yeah just fight fair if you're gonna say
the kids don't steroids i'd be like oh it makes sense but they're already saying it's not a fair
fight they're like i'm a real boxer and you're a YouTuber. That's not fair.
I feel like you could spin that. You could be like, yo,
if we're doing a real boxing match, you do drug
testing. If you're a real boxer, then come
and get tested. 100%. I don't fight anyone who's
on steroids, period. Maybe he doesn't want to throw
that idea out there because then
if those rumors start about Jake
that he's on the roids, then it's like,
ah, well, these wins have asterisks next to them.
Yeah. And then like, it lowers your excitement to watch his fights. He's like ah well these wins have asterisks next to him yeah and
then like it lowers your excitement to watch his fights he's like ah this is this youtuber on
steroids so i'm saying why doesn't tommy fury's can't come out because he probably still plans
to fight him later on he knows that's the money fight keep the value of this fight he could be
legitimately injured right like shitty timing it happens like you're boxing you're training boxing
like literally there was a video of tyson fury just a couple weeks ago with his father like slamming a medicine
ball you saw that yeah slamming a minute what what are you laughing at just laughing at
mark smells so good flies just
that flies in heaven right now son he is absolutely
going end zone to end zone points of fly i love it i love it he's in your drawers
he's in your drawers right now yeah the shorts are flat i'll give you that thanks
what we're saying oh yeah so like tyson, there was a video that he just put out recently.
Did you just throw in the medicine ball?
His pops is throwing a medicine ball at his stomach and in his ribs.
And then he literally is yelling at his pops.
Break my rib.
Break my rib.
Yeah.
Well, you know, some people built different, you know, because I don't think Tommy had it like that.
It's a bummer.
It was going to be a big fight. And I think like an interesting fight and more interesting than the tyrant fight i have
no interest in this rematch yeah i thought the 500 000 when you said it my first thought was
that's the only way he could try to get us to give a fuck is maybe he'll not this guy's gonna
go for the knockout i don't care now i think it's a good investment because in order for Tyron to knock out Jake, he has to take risk.
And risk puts him in position to also get knocked out.
So it's almost like you're incentivizing him to fight in a more dangerous way.
You're incentivizing him.
You go, hey, here's a half a million.
If you get me, try to get me out.
You're going to start lunging forward. I'm going to catch you with a counter sit your ass down it was hard to
catch you clean before now i'm gonna catch you clean because you're gonna be way more antsy and
way more risk you know what i mean yeah i just i also was just thinking the pr machine behind jake
seems like it's quieter all of a sudden since Since the Tyron fight, it doesn't seem...
Maybe they're going to ramp it up these next two weeks,
but I don't hear much about it.
What do you think it is?
He usually ramps it up two weeks before the fight.
Oh, well, which would be now.
I don't know.
I think it's a setup.
It's a blistered pepper setup.
There's only one main event that night.
Oh, yeah.
Could be from inside. I think that's what it is. it's a blistered pepper setup it's like there's only one main event that night oh yeah it's possible yeah they just got to cancel that whole fight man we got more important things to do you know your boy getting married boy getting married okay what else guys what else we got
anything else to talk about is there anything else anything happened anything different nothing spotify uh taking away comics money that's different yeah that's that's
actually kind of interesting story so like spotify you're kind of on the inside of this yeah there's
a uh so essentially what the way that spotify and these streaming companies pay musicians they pay
the two different royalty fees there's a a performance fee and a producing like writing fee.
Yeah.
Right.
Because some people are writing their own songs and some people aren't.
So like let's say, for example, Maroon 5 or Beyonce, for example, she gets a performance fee for the streaming.
But there's also a team of people that help put together that song and they also get paid for the production of it.
So Spotify has to pay those two royalties. that help put together that song and they also get paid for the production of it so spotify has
to pay those two royalties so basically uh some people in the comedy space started saying hey
we're performing and we're writing we want both royalties too you give it to these musicians why
don't you give it to us yeah and uh spotify just said nope yep and just yanked kevin hard a bunch
of these other people out.
And I think it really comes down to the fact that their business is not contingent on people
listening to comedy.
No.
And not that many people are just listening to comedy.
Yeah.
I will say, though, real quick brag, Raw Dog, it's on SiriusXM and Pandora, the station.
Yep.
Both albums that we released this year number
one first time they had two number
one albums so that was pretty cool thank you guys
very much you know what I mean only getting paid
one royalty you cheap fucks
but I appreciate it but it is
an interesting thing especially with comedy because
comedy is collaborative
there's so often times
you'll give me a tag I'll give you a
tag right and we do comedy together
i don't know if musicians are collaborative without credit like i don't know if i don't
know everybody gets credit everybody gets credit you put one word on the track you're a writer
you're right on the crash so in order to do that with royalties i'm sorry so in order to do that
royalties for stand-up right
all of a sudden you gotta talk to all your boys that were in the green room in fucking omaha
you're like yo i think you gave me that one tag about nail clippings all right here you go get a
little piece of the street you know what i mean and what sorry no i'm just saying that's gonna
be hard to do like it's a hard thing because culturally the way comedy works is somebody
could have said something in as reference to the joke.
And then you're like, oh, that'd be really funny.
Can I use that?
And then they're like, yeah, sure, use it.
Someone in the audience will say something.
Someone in the audience.
I was just about to say that.
So it's almost like as much as I want comics us to get another royalty check and I want it to be good, it will create other problems.
And that's okay, too.
We'll solve those problems as we get there. Or we just have have to go if we put it out that's ours and it's just
all ours yeah but it will create issues especially if you find out motherfuckers getting crazy checks
somebody's getting ten thousand dollars a month for a joke that you gave a bunch of tags to
helped out right you're like yo yep take care of your boy a little bit a little bit
tell me something so i don't know what do you guys think i just
don't know first of all i don't know how much comedians make on spotify period right like the
royalties are like 0.004 cents per dollar or some shit like that and i also don't know uh
i lost what the fuck i was gonna say they're leveraged they don't have leverage yeah they
got no leverage who gives a fuck comedy's all spotify who's a fuck the only leverage they have is pr and i don't think people care yeah yeah just gotta use pr to get back chapelle show
comics aren't on spotify nobody cares yeah there's single musicians that have more plays than all of
comedy on spotify yeah and so they're like yeah it's just not i don't think they're looking at
that as like their business like expansion models or like fuck it yeah it's like we could pay out more for something that doesn't make us any money it might even in some weird
convoluted way cost them money like just having to keep that kind of stuff up there update album
exactly it's something i don't know if it actually does but like so it's just like this is already a
nuisance yeah and we're doing it just because we want people to be able to listen to everything
yeah and now you're gonna ask for more when you're we're already losing on you guys now it seems like
where it could come back to bite them is if they're trying to expand into music and podcasting
if the podcasters happen to be comedians and then they piss off the comics that make them not want
to do the deal yeah it could impact them down the line but i think if they have a big enough bag to
throw it a comedian to do a podcast on the platform exclusively then they just bought if i want to
throw me 100 million yeah and those are the numbers i'm sure they ran yeah listen to me on pandora
radio i'm serious yeah yeah dude that's yeah i guess that is what it is yeah i don't even think
it was them like trying to big dick i think it was just like it's just not worth it yeah let's
take this money add a new feature to the site. Make Unwrapped better. Yes.
What's going to bring us actual business?
All right, guys.
We're going to take a break for a second.
But by now, you've probably seen about 1,000 gift guides for the holiday season.
I know I have.
There's a lot of people to get gifts for.
Nobody in this room. But gifts are for moms.
Gifts are for your dad.
Gifts are for your neighbors.
It could be for your cousin's dog.
There are plenty of
different ways to get gifts, and I'll tell you what you can get them all. You can get them a pair
of absolutely amazing Raycon wireless earbuds, okay? Raycons give you amazing audio quality
wherever you go, okay? Whether you use them to pump up, wind down, to work out, whatever you're
doing, they'd be incredibly useful to put on your list because your people in your life need to listen to good stuff.
And they can listen to that good stuff for a while, can't they, Akash?
Man, a 24-hour battery life, and it's cheaper than all the other ones.
You could buy two for less than the price of one of those other guys, the Air whatevers.
Yeah, that's true.
It's the best value.
Just go with good value.
So battery life is crazy.
Son, I'll listen to them. I've truly listened to them while I was moving into my apartment. Brand new, out's true. It's the best value. Just go with good value. So battery life is crazy. So I'll listen to them.
I've truly listened to them while I was moving into my apartment.
Brand new, out the box, didn't charge them at all.
And they did not die the entire day.
That's what I'm talking about.
Okay.
With their latest model, you get three new sound profiles to make sure everything you're
listening to sounds its best with just the right amount of bass.
Okay.
They got the pure mode.
That's for podcast listening. They got balance mode. That's for rock, heavy Okay. They got the pure mode. That's for podcast listening.
They got balance mode.
That's for rock,
heavy rock.
They got the bass mode.
That's for the hip hop,
the EDM and a reggae.
Okay.
So if you guys are going to take care of yourself and your family,
this holiday season,
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by raycon.com flagrant now let's get back to the show you made a really good point about unwrapped
uh unwrapped uh the spotify at the end of the year all the shit you listen to you want to share that
i mean this is like a tweet that people have been passing around but basically like spotify unwrapped
is like how they make your data how you how you they make it cool for people to use your data.
Everybody's sharing the fact
that Spotify
mined their data all year
and listened to every single thing
and watched and observed every single
thing they did on the platform.
They packaged it in a way that was cool enough
where we want to share it.
This is all the information I gave this company
so they could use to find more people like me. Every platform needs to do it. Yeah. Like, this is all the information I gave this company. Yeah.
So they could use to find more people like me.
Every platform needs to do it unwrapped.
Yeah.
Because then it makes it like, oh, yeah,
we all know that you're taking our data,
but at least make it fun for us.
Yeah.
You know what one of my favorite fucking apps on my phone is?
This is a feature on the Photos app.
You know, it just gives you a picture from your past. Oh day yeah just memories it is so cool it's also how good it is scary it's scary though
when like a girl come up on that shit you know what i mean like old old work old work be popping
up sometimes bro and you know you don't want to delete all of them yeah that's just a reminder
that's a reminder that's just memories being like hey just so you know just
so you know yo you used to do this down yeah but no it's a uh it's just a really cool thing like
tap in and then you scroll through and you just you're just hit with these literal memories but
you're hit with these like moments of your life that were great they're great enough where you
wanted a picture of them you want to keep it and like we're dudes, so we're not taking a million fucking pictures.
So the things that pop up are usually awesome times.
With a girl, it could be the same picture of her doing her fucking makeup in the mirror
or something like that.
Like memory stinks.
But with us, it's literally, oh shit, that one time where we were in Mexico City or oh
shit, that one time we were surfing fucking Africa or whatever.
The search is so good or like the photos are so good that you can search pictures in your actual photo
album and it'll bring them up. Do you know that?
Say this again? Like if you go to your photo album
right now and you go to pictures, you can
hit the little search thing at the top and you can type in
like, there's specific words that are blocked, but if you
type in like bra or like bikini,
it'll bring up all
the pics that they think are that.
It's extremely funny how you went there
first.
That's what we look at. Go to your phone right now search that shit it'll be like every screenshot you ever took every pic you ever got and it all just pops up my screenshots are fire y'all can't
screenshot yeah i want to see a tiktok unwrap for you andrew i will definitely show you that
that's exactly what i'm laughing at i will definitely show you that tiktok unwrap
that's not on me yo tiktok brought them bitches on my phone i didn't want to see them bitches
and then what they do is this is what you like it's like how do you know i don't like
something else yeah you don't show me nothing else it's pretty good this is some of what i
like this is some of what i like i don't like it you think i like it oh no i like it you force me
to like you force me i'm full i'm the
victim yeah you're the alec baldwin of this i'm the alec baldwin bro a hundred percent i swipe up
you put these crazy bitches on my fucking phone and what are they doing i don't know yeah you do
they also do the one where they're walking, but they're not walking. That shit is sexy as fuck.
That's fire.
Yeah, that's actually sick.
That was fire, dog.
That was fire.
I don't know what the fuck they're talking about.
I didn't know this one.
I didn't know that one.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
That was fire.
The rock where the girls are talking about sucking cocks.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And they do it to the rock's rap song.
Yeah.
You never seen this one?
No.
Y'all know TikTok losers. Yeah, you guys are losers. What are you looking at, Facebook? Old losers? Yeah. Facebook, yeah. And they do it to The Rock's rap song? Yeah. You've never seen this one? No. Y'all not on TikTok, losers.
Yeah, you guys are losers.
What are you looking at, Facebook?
Old losers?
Yeah.
Facebook?
Yeah.
For real, y'all are old losers.
Yeah, E-Bomb's world, bro.
You guys are on E-Bomb.
I'll put fucking TikTok on right now.
Yeah, we're over 18.
I'm like the girls you look at on TikTok.
Look at that.
Yeah, how long?
How long to swipe until you get a little ting, huh?
That was the first swipe. Yeah. No, no, that wasn't actually yeah no no okay here we go how long till you get an actual one that's right
we probably gotta be careful with this because the music little uh nurse
and they throw the shoes in the air and then it turns into their new outfit
oh yeah one swipe took one swipe Shut up
Oh this one's fine
Are we allowed to
I don't know
It's in the background
It'll be fine
Alright we sure
Talk over it too
This guy's funny
Do you guys know this guy
Meals by Coog
He's an Italian dude
No
How does he sound
No
He's like an
American Italian
Oh
Yes That guy's fucking funny dude How does he sound? He's like an American attack.
Yes.
That guy's fucking funny, dude.
I just got locked in a fucking TikTok game, bro.
Chill, bro.
That was crazy.
Sorry, dude.
I got locked in a fucking wormhole, man.
Okay.
What else we got?
Can we do feelings, facts please we've been
doing way too many facts this episode yeah it's a lot of facts it's just been non-stop facts all
right so we're just gonna just rifle through just rifle you don't know anything about these stories
i don't know and you're just gonna be reacting based off feeling and really no facts at all
let's go all right so jesse smollett's attorney uh is trying to get the trial acquitted. Free Jussie, son.
Real talk, free Jussie.
He's the victim, yo.
Hell yeah.
Yeah, he's the victim.
People hate this guy.
He's right.
It's a crime how much people hate this guy.
That's a hate crime.
That's a hate crime.
Yeah.
Yeah, I think we need to free this motherfucker.
And why do you want to free him?
Say again?
Why do you want to free him?
Just seemed like the opposite of what I should say.
He's just a guy trying to go to Subway, support brown business.
You know what I mean?
That's why you love him. I love mean? That's why you love him.
I love him.
That's why you love him.
He supports brown business.
Yeah.
That's a guy that spoke his truth.
Gave jobs to two Haitian dudes
in Syria.
Yeah,
he employed Haitians.
Oh,
Nigerian.
Haitians would have gone through
with it.
It would have been the show.
Yeah,
they would have been.
Haitians would have killed him.
Murder.
You're right about that.
But they said that,
what,
they're trying to get
the case thrown out?
Yeah, yeah. Because they're saying that the But they said that, what, they're trying to get the case thrown out? Yeah, yeah.
Because they're saying that the judge lunged at the attorney.
How?
By walking down off the stand.
They're saying that there was an act of intimidation.
What kind of walk?
Was she doing a TikTok walk looking like a little snack?
Yeah, but she wasn't actually walking.
She was just moving all sexy.
Yeah.
Come on, yo.
Come on, yo.
What?
These bitches never been lunged at.
You know what I mean? You can't even lun been lunged at. You know what I mean?
You can't even lunge at a bitch.
You know what I mean?
It's not like he did nothing to her.
He just probably did that shit.
He's just like, what?
That's a fucking pump fake, dude.
You never been lunged at?
It could have just been a TikTok, man.
It could have been a fucking TikTok dance.
This shit look like a...
That's a lunge, too.
That's it.
Get over yourself, bitch.
That's what I would say.
Damn, dude.
Yeah.
Damn. Yeah. Free Jussie That's it. Get over yourself, bitch. That's what I would say. Damn, dude. Yeah. Damn.
Yeah.
Free Jussie though, but get over yourself, lawyer ass bitch.
All right.
Ghislaine Maxwell.
Okay.
Pilots said that mad people were on the plane.
Innocent.
Hold on.
Hold on.
The real story about Ghislaine Maxwell, and this isn't verified, but we're going to say
it anyway, is that Casamigo himself, George Clooney, took it down.
Yeah. Well, she went down on him. Sucked him off. Yeah. S, let's say it. It's the Casamigo himself, George Clooney. Tuck it down. Yeah, well,
she went down on him.
Sucked him off.
Yeah.
Sucked him off.
In a bathroom.
In a bathroom.
Sucked him off.
Allegedly.
You're sucked on
George Clooney's cock.
She's the one alleging.
You know what I'm saying?
While George Clooney's wife
was busy trying to save the world.
Yeah, yeah.
She's a saint.
I love her.
Why is she snitching for?
What?
Why is she snitching?
She's the one who said that she did that? she was bragging dude you wouldn't brag you suck
george clooney's dick i know i would come on suck suck bro she was out there suck suck yeah you know
what i mean come on dick suck sweet sweet cocksuck just a sweet cocksuck bro one time for the king
you know what i mean son he's a hero dog
think who she would have been victimizing if you weren't getting his dick sucked she was
fine back in the day bro let me see a picture about it huge tits pretty face talk class
literal class talk about it you know what i mean like you would get your dick sucked there by in
a bathroom by her too you absolutely. There's not even a question.
Yeah, show Shorty right there.
Nah, nah, nah, nah.
Shit.
I mean, we got better, bro.
Show her more class.
This is not class.
What are you talking about?
Class.
I like more class.
Like, when she has clothes on and she's at, like, a ball.
Glenn Maxwell classy.
Yeah.
Yeah, I'll search classy.
I'm sure the sex vendor will have classy pictures.
Yeah, not Maxwell the artist. Fucking retard yeah yeah you didn't even know there wasn't maxwell the artist
young ass boy me no him you don't think he knows who maxwell is no what's that song you guys always
sing do do do do do shy oh come on no whatever yeah bro doesn't he sing shit too or did maxwell
poke his eye out or something no you're He didn't get a fetty walk.
Yeah.
No, there's one guy that stabbed his eye, too.
Yeah, but that wasn't Maxwell.
Who was that?
I don't know who it was.
God damn.
He was on Mushrooms and shit like that, right?
Yeah.
Music's old child?
Oh, yeah.
Music's old child.
Yeah, yeah.
He's kind of a Maxwell, eh?
These people, bro.
These people, I'm telling you, dude.
These people.
They, they. These people. They's people you, dude. These people. These people.
These people.
But with Ghislaine, right?
Can the first question just be how do you pronounce her stupid fucking name, dumb bitch?
Just tell us how to pronounce your name.
Ghislaine.
Ghislaine.
Yeah.
Okay, Ghislaine.
Class.
Ghislaine.
When she was just giving that throat to George Clooney, right?
Can we really blame George Clo clooney no dude i'm
telling you while she was sucking his dick she could have been victimizing some young woman
mad young girls that whole time oh she could have been out choosing her next target target was him
luckily of age man wow this guy's a hero dude low-key that guy is a hero fucking no that's a great point
you're making right there dude george clooney hey he saved these hoes bro you think she swallowed
him up yeah you gotta she loves kids she probably of course that was her favorite part everything
was brutal until that sperm came out finally and try to put some in get pregnant she probably gave
it to emcee she was like i got you the youngest thing possible. He's like, what?
All right.
The YouTuber moved the dislike button.
People are tight.
Yeah, I don't like that neither.
Why?
Honestly, I'm just going to say what Shifty posted on Instagram.
Say it.
Shifty said he can't tell if a video is worth watching
like a tutorial based on there no not being any like button oh that's true but i'm sure there
should be a ratio of like to views and now we'll pay attention to that right like it may might not
be as good but like for example if the tutorial was really good it'd have a high view count with
a highlight count if it's got 10 000 likes you're like all right that's probably good right but if it's got a million views and like
30 likes you're like something's off yeah it seems like they're trying to mitigate like people
getting ratio ratio so like you post a video that like is good but it's about like some like
typically a liberal take and then it'll get like 10,000 upvotes but then it'll be like 100,000
downvotes so the ratio is crazy even though your fans actually liked it i think it's what they're trying to mitigate so why don't they just reduce the value of a dislike
in the algorithm but keep it there so people can see i mean maybe they've already done that but
the video itself you'll look at and be like wow public opinion must really hate this video on
what's being said because the ratio is so crazy also it'd be weird if there's like 100 likes and
99 dislikes and then you press dislike and it's like 99.25 no no not you're saying like the weight in the algorithm
yeah weight in the algorithm not the actual but you're still gonna look at the shit
that was one of the dumbest things i've ever seen said in my entire life
holy shit yeah we're gonna make the likes pesos but you're still gonna look at the
shit no matter what dummy dude no no but you're still gonna look at the shit no matter what me dude
Conspiracy corner the most disliked video ever is produced by
youtube rewind 2018 i heard but also has a ton of likes why everybody hate it because like
youtubers like creators are kind of like uh i guess you could say purists in a way and they're
really like youtube like making a corny video with like celebrities that aren't actually youtubers exactly i think that's really what it is like
there are youtube celebrities and then there are celebrities that use youtube like will smith was
big into it etc and like having that yearly wrap-up feature all these celebrities because
you know it looks really cool for the brand etc probably made these youtube purists go yeah we're
the ones that build this shit.
We're getting all the views.
We're doing all this work.
We don't have these crazy fucking production companies.
We're doing ourselves.
Like, make it around us.
I can understand how they feel, way.
Yeah, I can too.
Like, how you would do that shit with the fancy movies?
Yeah.
You know?
I don't like it.
Go.
Why?
Because our numbers on Flagrant have this unbelievably high proportion of up likes and down likes uh analyze like i'm just saying this selfishly but like when you look at
trying to sell someone that some of the takes that you guys make on things are so wild
but you still see how in favor of those views people are especially when we're talking to
advertisers and we're like look people like it it's kind of like one of these things like bring back the dislike it really is a view to say oh people are ready
for some hot takes on this or some crazier content yeah we gotta sling more dick pills you still have
the analytics to show advertisers though yeah but it's it's nice to see it instantly it's it's quick
i i do it for like watching movie trailers quickly when it's honest it's it's like what
shifty said it's a real lead-in into the video
so one of the guys that posted the very first video ever on youtube which is posted like what
was it 13 no like 15 16 years ago a long time ago it's just this video called me at the zoo
it's like one of the first like creators and like one of the first employees at youtube
yeah he posted in the description basically saying that the dislike thing is bullshit
so he was like calling the removal of dislikes a good thing for creators cannot be done without
conflict by someone holding the title of youtube's creator liaison we know this because there exists
not a single youtube creator who thinks that removing dislikes is a good idea for youtube
or for creators so what do you do to stop the ratio these hordes of people that are just trying
to fuck up a video because they don't like the views of that person or like that person same shit happened to seth rogan essentially yes what
do you do to stop that i mean these are smart motherfuckers right dealing with these sophisticated
algorithms you can't find some way to like notice if something's being ratioed like come on i can't
i can't fathom that there's no way to crunch all that data and immediately know that this is a
targeted attack especially if these people are clicking on the video,
disliking it immediately, and then just clicking right out.
There's got to be a way.
Based off of their other watch patterns, they'll be like, oh.
Why don't they just give the creator the option?
Same way like Instagram.
You can turn on your like count if you want.
That's a good idea.
You can also turn off public likes and dislikes, I think.
I think YouTube lets you do that.
Oh, you can?
I'm pretty sure.
Oh.
Yeah.
They let you turn it off.
But I think the thought is like, if they're just trying to mitigate for people just ratioing,
and I think this is the best solution they came up with.
Yeah, it's a shitty solution.
Yeah.
And it looks pussy.
It looks like they're trying to protect people from criticism.
And brands and shit that actually give them big money, I'm assuming.
Oh. Because I think there'll be brands that'll do like some woke ad and then they're just gonna get ripped and then they're like why are we even using this platform if we're just gonna get publicly
ridiculed all right well tell those brands to take off the fucking like dislike yeah you do that
i'm pretty sure you can do that someone should double check but i think you can do that okay
next tristan thompson got another baby with another woman.
What a fucking idiot this guy is. He is one of the all-time fucking losers in the history of the world.
It's unbelievable, dude.
Just a fucking loser through and through in every way possible.
So this is his third baby mama.
Yes.
Cheating on his girl every time.
And then he basically sent a message to the girl, which he denies sending,
but it's his contact info in the fucking screenshot,
basically saying when she got pregnant,
hey, I'll give you $75,000.
That's all you're going to get from me.
I'm going to retire next year.
And he knows the fucking child support laws well enough
that he's like, since I'm unemployed,
you'll just get whatever percentage of unemployment.
You're not going to get any money.
I'm not going to be in the kid's life.
I'm not going to be in your child's life,
so you should just get the abortion.
Fam, cough up $500,000. You're such a fucking loser.
If you really don't want that kid,
cough up a million, you're still saving money on a kid.
Son, think about the fucking 60,
what was his contract?
60 million, the one that he got before,
he's had others since.
When they gave that to call her daddy bitch,
we all lost our minds.
For him, that's like a normal NBA salary.
He has got fuck you money for generations, and I'm sure his other kids are well taken care of. When they gave that to call her daddy, bitch, we all lost our minds. For him, that's like a normal NBA salary.
He has got fuck you money for generations.
And I'm sure his other kids are well taken care of.
They're Kardashian kids. He tried to lowball this bitch, too.
And he tried to lowball this bitch.
You're a fucking scumbag, dude.
Yeah.
Just a loser through and through.
I fuck it.
What a loser, dude.
Yeah.
You already wiped Khloe.
You know, I thought you couldn't get more pathetic than that, dog.
God damn.
Is that too far?
I went too far with that one? Keep going. I like remember when all the girls were like i like chloe i want to be like her that shit done vanished huh i haven't heard a bitch
want to be like chloe in about a decade yeah god when was the last time i got was faithful to her
she used to be the ugly fun one and then she got so much surgery. Super insecure. Always get cheated
on one. Yeah.
But Deion Sanders should bring
Tristan to speak to his players.
Oh yeah.
This will happen to you.
That's what you do. Holy shit.
Fucking loser. God what a loser.
That just sucks
in every way. I feel like there's a bunch of hot girls pregnant
I feel like it's not loser they're not hot dude
who's the hot girl
which one the hot ones
no he got the ugly one Alex just said it
don't put this all on me
she's post surgery
yeah the ugly Kardashian bitch ugly
who are you at the fuck
Caitlyn or Khloe
old Khloe
you just said Khloe
that's who he's with
that's the mother of his kid.
Right?
Like, that's not loser shit.
It's a Kardashian.
Yeah, stop cheating on this bitch.
Impregnating other women.
Why are you copying Please for Tristan?
Son, he's trying to cheat.
It's a Kardashian, bro.
Hey, hey, hey.
He's pro-abortion, this Catholic.
This guy was offered $75,000 for an abortion.
You support him.
It's a Kardashian, bro.
Hey, hey, hey. Jesus will talk to you at the gates, Mark.
Or whatever you fucking said earlier I tried to call back to.
Yeah, whatever I tried to call back to.
You know that shit.
Fuck, dude.
This is a tricky one.
What's tricky?
It's tricky because he fucked up by not paying more.
And I'm surprised he didn't come back with more.
He could have offered her an amount and she would have gotten that abortion.
Yes.
Everybody got an amount.
Yes.
So, and if she's smart, she knows he's a fucking idiot and it's going to fuck her again.
Like, get the money, get pregnant again, and then run it back again.
He's so stupid, he'll do it.
Yeah.
But to say that he's not a fucking idiot, he's a fucking idiot. He's a fucking idiot and a loser.
You get anybody pregnant, you don't want to get pregnant.
I hope you don't run into that.
Yeah, a loser.
You call it crazy.
He's a fucking idiot, just not a loser.
I don't know if he's a loser.
I think you're a loser if you're just trying to pay bitches to get abortions.
That's some scumbag shit, dog.
And when you lowball them.
He's a scumbag.
That's what I mean.
Whatever, bro.
75 grand, that's it.
Fucking synonyms.
You know what I'm saying?
Think about what he spent 75 grand on. A fucking necklace, probably. You know what i mean whatever brand that's it synonyms you know i'm saying like think about what he spent 75 grand on a fucking necklace probably you know what i mean like crazy like
trips guaranteed 75 grand there's tons of bullshit that he probably sent 75 grand he's gonna have
this kid with him locked to him guaranteed for the next 18 years of his life he's gonna spend
over a million dollars reading this uh raising his kid so he's a fucking idiot and he's a loser
you remember when he had this fucking i don't know if you remember this.
He had some like high and mighty speech.
I remember nothing about him.
He,
this is a headline for two days.
A coach,
they asked him if some coach inspired him.
He said,
if I ever need a coach to inspire me,
I'll retire from the league.
The day I need a coach to inspire me to play hard,
I'll retire.
So that coach can inspire you to play hard,
but a fucking kid can inspire you to retire
and not be in his life?
Oh, no, that's not why the kid is doing it.
He just noses up.
He's just trying to fucking, I know, hold her hostage,
but you're a scumbag, dude.
It's a scumbag amount of money.
It's a scumbag message.
It's scummy to keep cheating on Chloe.
If you marry to her, stop impregnating other women.
At least pull out.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yo, Ed, can you...
Sorry, sorry.
The least you can do. Chloe, we're talking about. The least you can do right though the least you can do don't get them pregnant ain't nobody even saying don't cheat just don't get them pregnant like that's where you're a
fucking idiot yeah pull out dmx's wife says some shit like i could handle the other women but when
he got like five girls pregnant i couldn't do it i had to be out oh man i saw that documentary on him oh how was that
rough probably sad huh yeah it was rough dude rest in peace yeah it's good though you should
check it out if you he's this uh he's a wild figure man engaging figure a loser son he's a
scumbag well i chose the wrong synonym okay i chose the wrong
six nine ten nine dollars married to dated kardashian all right next what's next he's cute
i just couldn't imagine seeing this guy on the street being like wow what a loser that guy is
i'm like you might be a scumbag might be funny a scumbag i try to be nicer about it
scumbag is awful to be i'd rather be a loser than a scumbag i try to be nicer about it scumbag is awful to be i'd rather be a loser
than a scumbag a piece of scum i don't know i mean i get the point yeah i would be too but i
don't know if he's a loser you are splitting hairs who's a winner bro yeah who's a winner
to you yeah is he a winner yeah i mean maybe i mean in life in life yeah he's a christian he's one of them christians
tom brady's a winner that guy's a winner tom brady's a winner yeah tristan thompson is tom
brady to you nah i just said he's tom brady cheat on his girl just because you don't just
because you don't love this girl after the kid oh yeah that guy's a winner had the kid took care
of the kid you know that's consistent yeah didn't send some fucking slimy text message winners are 60 million dollar contract next
all right madison cawthorne a uh representative from north carolina called women earthen vessels
in a impassioned speech about abortion yo miles said some funny ass shit bro yeah he said he said
madison cawthorne is in a wheelchair yeah and he said uh he's a earthen vessel
but yeah it was funnier when he said
sorry miles i didn't give you a good read there dog i tried to give you some credit
you need a delivery bro i know dude know, dude. I need that Miles delivery, bro.
Anyway, yeah, you know, aren't they?
I don't know.
What does it mean?
Somebody explain to me what's bad about this.
What does an earthen vessel mean?
I don't know what it means.
I got to break down the term.
Yeah, what does that mean?
How is Tristan Thompson not offensive to you,
and this is fucking offensive to you?
What is an earthen vessel? Explain what's offensive, Mark, you liberal cuck. And this is fucking offensive to you. What is an earthen vessel?
I never said it was offensive.
You liberal cuck.
I didn't say it was offensive.
What's an earthen vessel?
I think people are saying that.
I'll get his full statement.
Basically, he said,
Cawthorn's next argument sparked even more outrage.
Precious works of our creator formed and set apart
meet death before they breathe life, he said.
Eternal souls woven into earthen vessels,
sanctified by almighty God and entombed with the miracle of life,
are denied their birth.
Son, that shit was beautiful.
Yeah.
That shit was profound.
That shit was Game of Thrones, bro.
What was that old man from Game of Thrones?
R.R. Martin.
Yeah.
That was like George R.R. Martin.
R.R. Martin.
That shit.
Hell yeah.
That was some real next level fantasy shit, bro. That was like George R.R. Martin. Hell yeah. That was some real next level
fantasy shit, bro.
That was some Tolkien.
That's Tolkien.
It's funny because he kind of like
Bram. Real talk.
He's the brand of this shit.
I don't understand what an
earthen vessel is just yet. Do I have to look that up?
Because if I open my phone, I'm going to open TikTok.
No, he's saying eternal souls are put into earthen vessels sanctified by almighty god blah blah blah all this like flowery language people are saying bro you're talking about women you're talking
about like my body like you're saying all these children put into earthen vessels killed denied
their life like you're talking about me real talk like i don't know i'm i'm i'm starting the actual
thing is it's a clay pot no no no what's earth
go go go go go i'm starting to get tired with the abortion shit okay i didn't know that's where i
was going to be honest with you i'm starting to get tired with that shit okay no you should be
able to get your abortions or whatever i don't fucking care i'm just getting exhausted by like
yo let's figure this shit out already like don't we got the rules if the rule is they could get
the abortions conservative stop it with that shit't we got the rules? If the rule is they can get the abortions, conservatives, stop it with that shit.
Yeah, bro, take your L and move on.
And if the rule is this is the month
that you can't get abortions afterwards,
liberals, that's the month.
Stop stretching that shit out.
What if you only have a month
that you're allowed to get abortions, like February?
Why would you pick Black History Month, Doc?
Why would you pick?
Actually, that is a good point because I think statistically Black women
have abortions at a higher rate.
That's how you want to play it?
Oh, you think?
You think that?
You think that?
Or you know it for a fact?
No, Kanye West called it Black Genocide.
That's what he said.
That was a good spin.
So you just put it in one month and then if you want to get an abortion, you get it in Kanye West called it black genocide. Whoa. Yeah, that's what he said. He did. That's a good spin. That was good.
That's what I'm saying.
So you just put it in one month, and then if you want to get an abortion, you get it in that month.
It's legal for one month out of the year.
I'm starting to believe Jesus is great.
It takes nine months to have a kid.
Yeah, what if you get pregnant in March?
Yeah, you got to be strategic.
Be like, yeah, I'll let you, anyone hit it raw in January.
No nut November.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah.
So no one's nutting for that month anyways.
That doesn't count.
That shit is moving to March. I'll tell you that. Oh, March? March no one's nutting for that month anyways. That doesn't count. That shit is moving to March.
I'll tell you that.
Oh, March?
March and April.
Because, yo, come on.
You get pregnant in March, you're having a baby in what, January?
Yeah.
February, you done missed it.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I'm just exhausted with them going back and forth.
Like, what's the amount of months?
Four and a half?
Is that cool?
Like three months?
I don't know what the fuck it is when you can scoop these little bastards out but whatever the number that whatever the number that we decide
that's what it is that's what the fuck it's gonna be and i'm tired of it i'm being dead serious
though let's just figure out that fucking time that's's what it is. And then stop talking about it.
I'm so glad you're not a lawmaker.
Yeah, nah, what's the time, though?
You tell him the time.
I'd be so happy.
You tell him the time.
I want to hear you.
I think four months reasonably.
How much before they start getting fat?
I think about five months they start getting fat.
It depends.
Before that.
That's crazy.
It depends.
Because fat bitches don't get fat.
That's on them.
They can get abortions as long as you don't notice they're pregnant
they can get abortions anytime they want definitely pass on them fat ass genetics
definitely but not for real if you could start seeing that belly and shit
ah come on bro that's a life that's a life doc once you once you make my make my girl unfuckable. That is too much.
You think you could fix all the laws in America?
Easily.
Name one law.
Give me one controversial law and fix it right now.
Show up to the president in 2032.
I've said this many times.
Some people are contesting assisted suicide.
Some people say it should be legal to kill yourself with a cyanide pill.
Do it yourself, pussy.
You know what I'm saying?
These motherfuckers are like, oh oh danny can you pull the plug
i understand you cripple for the neck down roll your ass off the bed grab the plug
yank that shit out yourself like do you want out this world or not fam
okay that being said nobody listens to flagrant two better kill them so don't be fucking around
100 you're not getting assisted you're not doing nothing we need y'all unless they get the down
votes down vote that's fucked up that's foul and racist and you're racist don't be racist and don't
down vote okay but i'm just saying no listener flagrant 2 is allowed to commit suicide we're
not about that shit this asshole army you going through going through some shit. You holler at us. We fucking got you.
Okay.
Now.
If you.
Are pregnant.
That's kind of suey.
That's kind of a suicide.
Wait.
Why?
Because the baby's not.
Just a baby.
It's part of you.
You're killing part of you.
Let's call it suicide.
Oh.
But you're allowed to have a suicide.
You're assisting the suicide. You're allowed to assist suicide. When it suicide oh but you're allowed to have a citizen suicide you're assisting
the suicide you're allowed to assist suicide when it comes to when it comes to abortion abortion
sister suicide done okay problem solved give me another one all right universal health care do
you think everyone should have free access to health care it wouldn't even be universal it
would just be america i hate that so everyone in america be allowed to have health care it's not
like aliens come here to get health care right it's not from the universe it's just america anyway you believe in american
health care say what health care for everyone in america how do we yeah i believe in it how do we
fix y'all gotta pay for it okay right don't we gotta pay for shit yeah yeah all right so pay
a little money you don't want to pay a little money you go get fixed that is true we gotta
pay for water your car is broken what you gotta do you gotta pay for that shit yeah that's a good
point what if it just comes out of your taxes?
Say what?
It just comes out of your taxes. That's you paying.
Okay, so you're fine with that.
Hell yeah.
But why are we in the situation where we can't decide where our money is supposed to go?
Make that shit affordable.
That'd be better.
It'd need to be more affordable.
But like, I'll pay myself.
You don't got to take the money out of the taxes.
I'm an adult.
Damn.
I'm an adult, Mr. Government.
Fixed it.
I've already fixed. Give'm an adult, Mr. Government. Fixed it. I've already fixed.
Give me another one.
Okay.
Should illegal aliens have access to U.S. tax dollars through the form of health care
and public schools?
What's a legal alien?
A legal alien?
Yeah, what's a legal alien?
What's a legal alien?
Someone has a green card.
So they're technically not a resident, but they have residence tax.
Why do you call them aliens?
Just because the card is green?
They're aliens?
Yeah, that's fucked up. That's a little xenophobic's fucked up that's a little xenophobic i think you are a
little xenophobic man so what is it again should illegal aliens be able to go to the hospital here
and and get it for free or like go to public school well no they don't get it for free you
got to charge them they just breaking the law by not paying the taxes yeah but what i say is this
what do you what say you once once you get that
citizenship yeah you gotta pay the piper you gotta pay the piper you're coming for them back taxes
if you put our hero wesley snipes in jail for not paying taxes well then we're putting you in jail
too javier because because why the fuck does wesley snipes gotta go to jail for not paying taxes
but you don't gotta go to jail for not paying taxes but you don't got to go to jail for not paying taxes
now you don't got to go to jail
but you need to cough up a little something fam
so what if you just make them clean the hospital
after they get healthy you know like when you can't pay a dinner bill
you got to do the dishes
that's a good ass point
that's a good ass point
now what about this one
what if they were paying taxes the whole time oh then what they don't gotta pay shit oh sick yeah that's the first thing he said
i don't know why we went back to that to be how do you know they're not paying the taxes if they're
getting a check they're paying taxes they're illegal aliens though they got no citizenship
they're sorry i don't use your fucking xenophobic they're illegal immigrants yeah they came into
this country without citizenship they don't have it they're not paying taxes i mean honestly immigrants are lit bro like yeah yeah
i got a soft spot for immigrants i mean my mom's immigrant like they're fucking lit yeah also yeah
like also like yeah they get to go to school and all these types of things but they also have to
live like in fear of being kicked back to their fucking country they're not using the same uh amenities that we would use as americans like they don't
want to call the fucking cops if there's a problem they don't want to go to the hospital unless they
have to so it's not like they're actually using it the same way we would use it so they got to
get a discount on that that's smart and they're lit if i think you're lit that is what it is
but not all but not all illegal immigrants there's some that could go back
like which ones in this room we only got one but you're not illegal yeah he's legal
nah some could go back which one specifically do you know them by name
canadians canadians canadian
man it's like what about green card green card counts right no you could What about green card? Green card counts, right?
No, you could get a green card.
That's not illegal.
But if you're Canadian, you're allowed to be here for three months.
And if you're extending past that, you're being an asshole.
Go back.
Go back.
Go back and then come back again.
You know the fucking rules.
You love so much.
Oh, Canada.
Oh, Canada.
Oh, America sucks.
Go back.
And if you're an american living illegally in canada
don't do that yeah why would you do that don't do that cross the border back yo come on cross
the border back run it back you get your next three months and you're good to go like oh hey
play by the rules here you know i'm saying yeah we should be able to use their health care
hell yeah just in general in general i think we are we think we are. We should. Yeah, we are. We should. People take bus trips across the border.
But we should, absolutely.
They get to use our army care.
Oh, shit.
If somebody invaded Canada, you don't think that we go there and fuck their asses up?
We're not about to have some new neighbors up north.
They don't even need an army.
So we got your back.
Anything happens to you, we get to use your health care if anything happens to us.
That's a pretty good goddamn relationship if you ask me.
Okay, solved. Done. i was solving america some people some people say shawls really does save america some people say it's controversial that children transition at a
young age into uh oh here we go they're they're not button yeah they're assigned gender that
affect 12 americans every year so what do you think should children be allowed to transition
at birth how would you solve that birth dog come on to transition at birth? How would you solve that problem?
At birth?
Come on.
Who knows at birth?
No.
Baby can't even talk.
You think he knows?
At what age can you transition?
I'll be honest with you.
My kid's not even allowed to have an accent I don't like.
Okay.
Like if we live in Los Angeles and they have that LA accent, you know, the dudes out there
speak gay.
Gay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You know what?
We do. What accent? What's the accent? That's what speak port gay yeah yeah what are you talking about yeah they say oh yeah it's over in the in the court park like that's how i thought they put o's and shit no that's the gangster mother
yeah get my core yeah i'm gonna get my
no i'm talking about like the white kids Like LA kids
Like yeah
Like we should
Totally hang out
Like if I hear my son
Having that vocal fry
I'm gonna beat his ass
Yeah that's it
So you're definitely
Not gonna be able to transition
When you're 18
Do whatever the fuck
You want with your body
Unless you're my daughter
And then what happens
What?
And then what happens
To your daughter
Keep that pussy clean
Bitch
What's your
Wait little bitch Well when's your daughter Alive to lose clean, bitch. What? Wait a little, bitch.
Well, when's your daughter allowed to lose her virginity?
What the fuck are you doing getting filled up all down sunsets, strips?
You know what I mean?
When is she allowed to lose her virginity?
Say what?
When is she allowed to lose her virginity?
She didn't lose it.
Bitch know what she did.
You know what I mean?
Like, why do we act like she lost it?
She didn't lose it.
Right?
It was right there.
And what happened to her?
And then she let some fucking Persian't lose it right it was right there and what happened and then she let
some fucking persian guy take it from her you know what i mean some shots of sunset slime ball
you know what i mean and that's fucked up you didn't lose it dummy i lost my virginity go get
it back go get it back yeah get it okay so that's my rules but yeah you're not transitioning Out of my fucking house
Until you turn 18
And then do whatever you want
Unless you're my daughter
Okay
Lost my virginity
Lying ass bitch
I dare you
What if your son transitions at 18
And then all of a sudden
He has a vagina
Yeah
Same rules apply
You ain't gonna be taking
That little pussy around town
disrespecting me.
It's a brand new little pussy.
You know what I mean?
Get over here, Todd or Riley or whatever
your fucking new name is.
Hey, what's up with that pussy?
You letting Persians in that pussy
like your slut sister?
You lost your
virginity too? Did you?
So let's reenact this. i'm your son i'm just gonna come
out okay so i'm atm like hey dad i just transitioned i'm actually a girl now all right yeah okay is
that cool what do you mean is it cool you already did it you dumb fuck you don't talk to me is it
cool of course it's cool you gotta be like yo where your dick at bring back that dick i gave
you bring back that fucking dick I gave you.
Where that shit at, yo?
Nah, I transitioned and I have a vagina now.
Okay, that's what's up.
Let me see it.
Let me see it, yo.
Let me see that shit.
That makes me uncomfortable.
It don't matter if you're uncomfortable.
I'm uncomfortable right now.
I see my son stay in this room with a whole fat pussy, you know, wearing the fucking Lululemons.
I see them lips
grabbing the seams
and I'm trying to act like
I don't want to look
at my son's pussy.
That's uncomfortable for me.
Please call me your daughter.
And it's a new pussy.
Yeah, new pussy.
That's like,
when you have a baby,
you got to change diapers
and shit.
Yeah.
You probably got bandages
leaking all over the place
and shit.
Kid's a fucking mess.
This kid's a fucking mess okay so
what else oh my god please call me your daughter not yours yeah you're my daughter son
the fuck you want me to call you man like this is how we speak out here this is what happens
when you start speaking with that la shit that's my daughter i'm walking around town you're my
daughter what's up yeah okay you want to get some heels or some shit?
Yeah.
Let's go.
Come on.
We'll get us crunchy.
Yeah.
At my wedding, you think you'll dance with me?
Of course I'm going to dance with you.
As your daughter?
Fuck yeah.
Let's dance.
We're dancing.
What song?
Say what?
What song you doing?
Candy sweet, goodies gold.
Let me see the head to the sea roads.
I want to ride.
I want to ride.
I want to ride.
I want to ride.
What's up? Let's go. I'll bend you over. I would've had it. Oh, that's a true talk.
Let's go.
I'll bend you over.
What?
Hey.
Hey, yo.
You're my dad.
Say, well, hey, listen.
I don't identify as it.
What do you identify as?
I identify as a dude who's about to crack that new thing.
You know what I mean?
Pop open that little tennis ball thing.
You know what I'm saying?
Just a little, you know?
You made me this way i
didn't yeah you did you were gone all the time doing comedy and telling jokes and then i became
a woman now i retired when you were born you fucking liar you fucking lying ass piece of shit
okay believe in everything your mom says let me get her out here yeah she could tell you why you're
this way yeah all right hey baby see look at this why is he why is're this way. Yeah. All right. Hey, baby. See, look at this.
Why is she this way?
Fucking dick is gone.
It's how I felt the last fucking 20 years.
Now, both of us got useless dick.
I never had so much in common with my son, daughter,
or whatever the fuck they are.
Thanks for accepting me.
Okay.
Solved.
Problem.
Done.
One more problem, and then the episode is over
okay uh i mean does anyone else have a problem they want to propose exactly i have a few solve
literally every problem there's a few environmental problems that are striking please go with one of
them so it seems like as the earth is heating up the corporations are not actually being
disincentivized to try to you know stop global warming the earth is not heating up okay but it looks like a lot of data suggesting that
actually is and that by 2050 we'll be underwater no we won't how do you know
because no that's his strongest argument so far i know for a fact we won't be underwater in 2050
well there's a lot of for a fact there's a lot of data that suggests that the ice caps are not.
Well, he knows for a fact, though.
I know for a fact.
I already solved the ice cap shit, fam.
I already solved the ice cap shit.
How?
Oh, yo, you weren't here for this.
Matter of fact, we should bring that up.
Yeah.
We should talk about the elephant in the room.
Yeah, the elephant in the room.
There's a water crisis, meaning there's no more water left, right?
Yeah.
Like Poland Spring and all these motherfuckers bought up all the aqueducts and shit.
Just shock the sky, make it rain.
We good.
We don't even need that, fam.
Them polar ice caps is melting.
What are they made out of?
Water.
Melt that shit into a bucket.
That's it.
Done.
It's over.
Yeah.
And Saudi Arabia or one of these motherfuckers
Is doing that shit
They trying to take a piece
Of an iceberg
Bring it over there right now
So that's solved
Water is fine
But that doesn't
Change the fact
That it's all melting
You're just saying
Yeah melt it
But he's saying
We're gonna use it
And drink it
Yeah
Melty is good
And then we're gonna
Pee it out
And then it's gonna
Still be melted
No it's not
You pee way less
Than you drink
Not me
You pee way less
Than you drink
That's a fact
You also sweat Some of the water out You pee out other things You didn't know like steak juice or mayonnaise
it's an even transfer dog come on bro like get your shit together okay so everything still
melted but what do you mean where does the water go say again where does the water go it goes into the earth
the earth can handle water that's true now he right how does it freeze again you're not
answering the question they don't need to freeze we don't need frozen things
i'm an environmentalist okay but he's right i'm right so you're saying we need to drink the water
before it melts we don't need to do nothing and everything's going to be fine.
I guarantee you that.
We don't need to do nothing.
Hey, hey, hey.
We don't need to do nothing.
Everything will be fine.
I guarantee you that.
Okay.
There's going to be a couple of motherfuckers that, you know, they live in them, you know,
them Asian motherfuckers that live in the houses that got stilts.
Yeah.
That's so arrogant that they do that.
Talk to me about that.
Never seen a wave in your life?
Yeah.
You're going to build it on the ocean?
And we're supposed to feel bad.
We got to stop.
There's land right over there.
I've got to stop drinking cans of shit
because you live on stilts?
No, this can is infinitely recyclable.
How do you know that?
You don't know how long infinity is.
You don't know how long infinity is.
It says on the can of our sponsor.
So how do you dispute that?
What I would say, me personally, is if I knew I could recycle some shit longer than motherfuckers live, I'd be like infinity.
Son, that's a long ass time.
Because we can't check infinity.
That's infinity.
All right, fair enough.
More than I last.
I mean, it's not really a definition, but I hear what you're saying.
Short lifespan ass.
Okay, so everything's melting.
Yeah.
It's going to be melted.
Yeah.
We're all going to be underwater.
We're going to be drinking it.
There's going to be more people. They're going to need more water. Think about this. You take gonna be more people they don't need more water about this you take the water for melts hold on
you take the water for easy you ship it to yourself in fucking nebraska yeah the water
doesn't go back into the ocean when it rains it rains in nebraska now you got more vegetation
in nebraska there's a river in nebraska corn huskers got more corn yeah son it's the most
fertile year they had all of a sudden there's so much more rain It goes back to the ocean
No how?
A river
But you ship the water to fucking Nebraska
And then it rains and goes to the river
Mark
Where's the river go?
Ask me a hard question
Bro it's all the water's melting
You have to answer this
Ask me an actual hard question
He's stumped
You can't even answer it
Why they blew the levees in New Orleans
To save the rich neighborhoods
And then made sure that they would
Take out the poor neighborhoods Ask me that question yeah that address that okay why don't
we address that fine why don't we talk about why don't we talk about the levees why don't we talk
about how mississippi was affected way more during hurricane katrina right why don't we talk about
that and nobody even talk about mississippi answer the question why don't we talk about that oh maybe
because um maybe because those levies broke did
you notice after the storm you know that it didn't happen during it was after yeah oh that's it what
a coincidence that is and maybe there was a lot of pressure on what are those fancy ass neighborhoods
called i forget which wards they were interested in this shit talking about man god damn she got
way less fun all of a sudden oh no he learned all this
who's change ass motherfucker over here talking about george bush doesn't care about black people
come on no you were doing a map it wasn't george bush it wasn't george bush but it was true i'm
just trying to put y'all on game i'm trying to put y'all on game just open your third eye so
everything's melting and nothing's getting refrozen how are we not gonna be underwater
you still haven't explained it.
Son, we got more land and grass, bro.
Son, how is there going to be more land?
Because it's more rain.
Akash, Akash, Akash, shut up.
Look, listen.
Listen, you don't know anything about the environment, bro.
Let me handle this.
Okay, okay.
Let me get this straight.
Sorry, sorry.
I'm the expert, okay?
You're right.
Go ahead.
So look, basically this is how it works.
Yeah.
expert okay you're right go ahead so look basically this is how it works yeah when you drink water yeah when you drink one liquid death of water yeah how much you think you pee out out of that
uh some how much maybe half no no like you wouldn't pee out one whole liquid death come on
bro i need to use the water to hydrate you You maybe pee out half a liquid, though? I would say you pee out 25%.
Okay.
So.
What happens to the other 75%?
Can we look up how much of your water you pee out?
It's a little bit more than that, but it's cool.
I'll brush you up with you.
All I'm saying is me, you, and I.
Feels no facts.
Feels no facts.
Like, I use probably more than y'all.
I have a lot of things going on.
You don't pee?
No, like, when I drink a liquid death, it takes, for my whole body and shit, I need
75% of that shit.
So you're saying you pee very little.
This motherfucker pee right out.
I don't even know if you drink anything.
I don't hold no water, man.
I thought you just got one fucking water slide in your body.
Yeah, straight line.
That shit is a straight line.
That's what I'm saying.
Real tough.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
I'm doing the math.
They don't check out, but go ahead.
All right, so you drink a liquid death.
You pee out only 25%.
We need water, Mark.
Okay?
The water that was the ice caps melts into bottles.
We put those bottles, we put tops on it. Then we put them in some plant for Liquid Death, Poland Spring, other places.
Okay?
They just chill right there.
Whenever we need to drink something, we drink something.
Pee that shit back out into the ocean.
It's lit.
The ocean goes up lit the ocean goes up
how it goes up mark you peed into it oh yo mark why are there rivers anymore there's no rivers
because there's no water flowing into the river why is there none because it's not hot anymore on
the top of them it's not cold anymore the top of the mountain so them streams are not starting
because you don't have any snowfall and the snowfall is not pouring into the river and making
a river therefore the rivers are not filling up more so we're just going to take the liquid deaths ourselves pour them into
the river ourselves make rapids so but you didn't just admit to the earth heating up yeah you didn't
say it you didn't say i just want to make sure you didn't if the rivers are like if the rivers
are then the ocean is more full no it's not yeah because if the rivers are all empty and all the
snow is melted then the ocean is going to be more no because there's nothing in the rivers to fill
the oceans the oceans are already full the oceans are coming back up the ocean is going to be more. No, because there's nothing in the rivers to fill the oceans.
The oceans are already full.
The oceans are coming back up the rivers.
It's a new one.
It's a new one.
It's a new one.
We're actually going to reverse all the rivers, you fucking retard.
You didn't know that?
We're reversing the rivers.
The rivers flow backwards now. And then they go up the mountain.
Up the mountain.
Up the mountain.
Yeah, Chicago, they reversed the rivers.
They reversed the river.
You didn't know that?
You didn't know that?
Yeah, stupid.
Can you ask a smart question for once in your fucking life?
Just put a Brita filter on the ocean and we good.
That's it.
That seems like a great idea, too.
Yeah.
All right, look, guys, is there anything else that we should talk about?
Is there anything else?
All jokes aside.
All jokes aside, is there anything else that we should address?
Is there anything that has happened obviously obviously yeah i mean we should talk about this is the most
iconic music cover of all time have you been hanging out with white people we should talk
about oh no he did it dude you got a baby dick on your shirt bro that's gross yeah
i'm expecting yeah yo why you got a baby dick on your shirt i'm expecting yeah yo why you
got a baby dick on your shirt yo is that a black baby no that's a but that's a big dick
i'm a fucker hang time and you know shit water looks smaller this is a black baby that's a black
baby water looks bigger or smaller wait in the water the water? Yeah. It looks bigger, I think. I mean, he's drowning.
It's a black baby.
Huh?
Shit.
That's a good point.
Black genocide, bro.
That's what Connie was talking about.
With that said.
Oh, my God.
Guys, I guess there's nothing for us to talk about, man.
No, nothing.
I think we did it all.
I think we did it all.
I mean, there's always Patreon. Maybe if there's something to address, think we did it all i think we did it all i mean uh there's always patreon maybe if maybe if there's something addressed we could
always do it on patreon patreon.com slash flagrant 2 every friday new episode um but yeah listen we
love y'all we appreciate y'all and uh felt different today the episode felt different but
more normal somehow yeah yeah yeah that's good i think miles talked less than that yeah yeah maybe somehow. Yeah. Yeah. That's a good observation.
I think Miles talked less.
Yeah, maybe. That's big.
Maybe. There's something there. Anyway, we love you guys.
We appreciate you guys. Have a great one.
This is Flickr too. Peace.