Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - FLAGRANT FREESTYLE FRIDAY

Episode Date: March 29, 2019

This week, Andrew, Akaash, and Kaz discuss being happy in New York City, China having a fake population count, Ted Bundy getting all the bitches, Freestyling', NFL rule changes, Gronk retiring, and more. INDULGE!!! Listen to the full episode: www.Patreon.com/Flagrant2

All right. You want to freestyle? Yo, you know Akash is nice at freestyling. We used to freestyle outside the Selka like a group of commas. Son, let's go. Son, Akash is nice, man. Like, he would body everyone. Go, go.

No, here's the thing. I have like four. What is this here's the thing? Just do it. I have like four whack ones. Boom, boom. And then like the fifth will be like, yo, he hit that shit. Yo, did y'all hear me just fucking beatbox?

It's just destroyed. It's just right now, son. Fuck out of here, bro. He said boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom Baby, I like it like that. I like it like that. I like it like that. Okay, ready?

I'm going to do a chorus, and then I'm going to lead it right into you, and you're going to bust a freestyle. That's too much pressure, dog. It's mad pressure. No, no, son. It's mad pressure. You're Indian, bro. Y'all bill for this. All 100 million of you.

It really ain't that many Indiansians so that's a lie fam so should we talk about sports oh boy yo nobody more fun than us like you have to admit everybody listening right now like you're at work this is so much fun just just acknowledge the amount of fun that you got look up from your stupid fucking cubicle. Yeah. And look how miserable your coworkers look. They're so miserable. They're so miserable because they're not listening to this right now. And you know what we're going to do?

We're going to have a freestyle about it. Boom, boom, boom. Boom, boom, boom. Boom, boom, boom. Come on, our guys. Give us some bars. All right, bro. Oh, it's on.

It's lit. Ready? Give me a word so I don't overthink it. Truffle. All right. Yeah. That's a hard one, though. All right.

Yo. Yeah. Yo, hit a beat. Hit a beat. Hit a beat. Oh, you want a beat? All right, I got it. Maybe.

Stop, stop, stop. That's crazy. Don't worry about a beat. Don't worry about a beat. Because mine should be a little bit crazy. Don't worry about a beat. It's a little out there. Don't worry about a beat.

My beat's autistic. Oh, boy. All right. All right. It's a little out there. Don't worry about it, B. My B's autistic. Oh, boy. All right. All right. You know what I mean? All right. Oh, shit. Is this clean?

I ain't gonna do it. Bad song day. Blood on your face. Big disgrace. Whipping your stomach all over the place. Yeah, it face. Big disgrace. Whipping your something all over the place. Yeah, it is.

That was a good movie. Was it? Yeah, it was pretty good. Nah, I'm not so happy with that shit. Boring as fuck. Star was born as trash. Whoa, bro.

You have no heart, son. You know what was good? Black Klansman. Black Klansman was good, but Star was born and that was good. Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo. Get out of this freestyle, son.

I know he's trying to not freestyle. No, no, no. We'll get back to it, but that's a trash movie. All right. But don't listen. All right. Let was good. Trash. Yo, yo, yo, yo. Get out of this freestyle, son. I know he's trying to not freestyle. No, no, no. We'll get back to it, but that's a trash move. All right. But don't listen. All right. Let's go.

You go. Truffle, right? All right. All right. Woo! You know something that rhymes with truffle already? Because I've been trying to think since I suggested it. I've still been thinking.

That's why. All right. Let's do a different word. Ready? All right. Baptize. I'd be picking hard ones. Okay. What about just like...

Yo, I bless you get baptized. Fucking this girl ass wise. My shit's expensive like truffles, so I'm getting chips like ruffles. I ain't really thinking too much. I'm just spitting. Let's go, dawg. We just chilling. We in the fucking, we in the fucking lacking.

I got nothing to say. I got out. Yo, but the first four bars was hot. I'm telling you, I'm out. The first four bars was hot, bro. I'm telling you, I'm out. The first four bars was hot. I'm telling you, I'm out. Oh, shit. You a rapper, son.

You missed your call. I had four like that where I stumble around. I got chips like ruffles. Whoa. I wouldn't have came up with that. Damn. That's it. Yeah.

Okay. Oh, shit. Damn, Kaz. Kaz, you just saved me. We were freestyling. And I was about to have to freestyle. You got to hit one, too, though, Kaz, for the culture. You got to redeem yourself with that mega head.

Hey, guys. What's up? Hey, Kaz is here. He doesn't know he's fired yet. So this is a good moment for Kaz. You all right, Kaz? What's up? Everything okay in your life?

Kaz, what's good, man? See how he just dropped the energy way down? Like, we're having so much fun and motherfucking K-Man. Clap. Go on, Kaz. You got to spit it freestyle. You got to hit a freestyle. I hit a round.

Alex pussied out. No, Alex not done. Everybody going to have to freestyle. Okay, you guys got to give me a word oh good word flagrant from Eden okay flagrant that's a hard one flagrant nah we got to keep going give me another one flag Okay. Go. Okay. Flag it.

Flag it. Flag it. Okay. All right. Okay. Okay. Ready? Oh, boy.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay I'm thinking right now is how do I not say that word? That's the only thing going through my head. Okay, okay, okay, okay. Bob Saget. The word's a flag, right? Yeah, I know, but you gotta find words that rhyme with it. Yeah, it's called rap. So.

Okay. Okay, ready? Okay. All right, all right. You got to find words that rhyme with it. Yeah, it's called rap. So. Okay. Okay. Ready? Okay. All right. All right.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Ready? Ready. I stand proud for the flag.

You're just speaking spoken word. I told you to rap. Oh, how do I do that? You need a beat or something. Alex, hit a beat. Okay. Oh, shit. No, no, no. Have that shit in the background.

Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! I just... Hey! Hey! I just... Uh. Uh.

Uh. Uh. Okay. What happened? No, we good. Hold on, hold on. Okay, okay. Ready? Yeah, we good, we good. Okay, okay. Sure we good? Yeah, yeah, we good, we good. Okay, because I didn't like that expression you just made. I thought the whole shit was lost. The whole shit almost was lost.

Okay. Alright, let's go. Ready? almost was lost. Okay. All right, let's go. Ready? Uh, okay. Schultzy. Snowcoon. Snowcoon Schultzy in the building. Ready? Stand proud for the flag.

Don't got nothing else. Okay. I was surprised I just stayed the first line on beat. What the fuck? Hold on, hold on, hold on. How did we get here? Hold on, hold on, hold on. Hey, guys, you missed a lot, fam.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can't walk into the story like, what y'all talking about? You just got to get on board. I just did it. So, okay, I don't think I could do it with a beat. I think that's too complicated. I remember when I was auditioning for Wild N' Out. I did the same thing.

I said. I said, acapella that shit. I said, well, I did the same thing. I said do it with a beat. I think that's too complicated. I remember when I was auditioning for Wild N' Out. I did the same thing. I said. I said, acapella that shit. I said, well, I did the same thing. I said, give me a word. And the bar is so low for not black people. They were like. Oh. They were like, freestyle if you want.

You don't have to. I was like, I'll try. Give me a word. And they were like, oh. Oh, shit. We asked for a look. Shit. Oh, that's how you got it.

Yo. Because if I would not look at you and expect that you'd be able to freestyle. Oh, I killed the wild out one. And you just impressed the shit out of me, son. They gave me Candle, and my shit was much better than it was there. Oh, Candle's easy. Candle was something. No, no, no, no.

He gave me Tennessee. And then I said something. I made it into, like, I slanted it into Candle. I said something about Mr. Wendell. I said something like, I'm not from Tennessee. But I know Mr. Wendell. I something like i'm not tennessee but i know i like to drink hennessy enemies enemy he's every tupac line okay tennessee candles good candle um grab my dick like a handle i said something about fire like a candle or whatever and oh fire like a

candle and then yeah all right flag i really can only think of one word that rhymes with it so i'm Something about fire like a candle or whatever. Oh, fire like a candle. And then, yeah. All right. Flag. I really can only think of one word that rhymes with it. There's mad words that rhyme with flag. Oh, flag. Bag, sag, swag. Now that you say that, it's more obvious. But before, okay.

Because you're only thinking of that one word. I know. That's what I'm trying to say. All right. Get it out your head. Stand for the flag. Okay. I stand for the flag. I it out your head. Stand for the flag. Okay. I stand for the flag.

I work to get bags. Chicks reflexes never gag. Because my dick always sags. That's it. I just murdered it. I just murdered it, son. Y'all seen that? That's all right.

Alex, where you at? That's so bad. All right, Al, go. All right, Kaz up. Kaz up. Yo, don't be scared. Why everybody so scared of this? Give me a word, yo.

Eddie can barely speak English. He talks all day. This motherfucker, like, we're just asking us to rhyme words. Okay, Al, go. Right, here's your word. Ready? Eddie speaks English? Huh?

Eddie speaks English? Okay, all right, ready? Here is your word. All right. Use, if you like to use it, you have to use it. Oh, no. Okay? Okay Alright Ready Here's your word Use If you like to use it You have to use it Oh no Okay

If you like to use it You have to use it Okay We're gonna give you A nice easy one Ready Pumpkin Pumpkin

Yeah Pumpkin Blumpkin What rhymes with pumpkin Alright How about Something How about table? Table solid.

Ready? Got it. What? Yeah. Something. What? Come on. Table's easy, bro.

Son, I'm blanket, son. You're just nervous. Just do it. Hey. Hey. Okay. Head moving. Hey. So you Okay. Head moving. Hey.

So you banging on a table. I got rhymes like a stable. I don't know what that means. There we go. Hey. Hey. That shit was trash. Yeah, I know.

Keep it up, Kaz. Kaz. Now you know we got to give Kaz a word. All right. Ready? Okay. Late. Late.

Okay. Yeah. Your word is late. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Late. Okay, yeah, your word is late. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey.

Hey. Hey. Hey. Okay. My name is Kaz. I'm always late. Don't hate. I'm neither fond of mate.

Hey. It's my fate. This shit is the best date. Y'all embarrassing me. Yo, man. Real talk, man. This shit is embarrassing for Black people. Real talk, yo. Yo's my fate. Y'all embarrassing for Black people. Y'all embarrassing for Black people. Real talk, yo.

First off, you gave me such a simple word, bro. That's what you want? A hard word? Expeditious. Expeditious. Motherfucker.

I like expeditious. All right, let's go. Expeditious. I stick my dick in your mouth and it tastes so delicious. Hey! And this is truth,

motherfucker. It's not fictitious. Expeditious. There we go. I'm good. That was all right. That's three words. It was all right.

Y'all were so trash. We'll be honest. Our costumes was the best. Mine was second best and then y'all were both sucked. So, Ed and- I came in cold as fuck, man.

You were ready to go? I don't- I can't breath. Well, that's the fun part. Yeah. That's the fun part. Yeah, yeah. That's why it's funny. Get on the mic, dog. You were ready to go? I can't breath. Well, that's the fun part. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. That's why it's funny. Get on the mic, dog.

We'll give you a word. Make it Spanish and make it easier. Here's your Spanish roast. No, no. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. Okay good English is your second language? No that's a joke Okay Ready? Okay ready?

Border Okay ready? Okay I did a switch in my bad Okay Come on I did switch it. My bad. Okay. Come on. Okay.

Keep going. Keep going. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Bad Bunny. Hey. Okay. Let's go.

Hey. Flying through the walls. You could tell me I'm the border. Gotta get your girl. I'm gonna try to go and hoard her. That's all I got. Keep that bitch in the closet with a flying cat. Stupid bitch.

It's hot out here. Hostage ass bitch. It's hot out here. Yo, what's up? This is Akash. That was a preview of our Patreon episode. It's hot out here.