Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - Hunter Biden NEEDS Andrew Tate

Episode Date: July 12, 2022

00:00 - Hunter Biden needs Andrew Tate 21:16 - TMZ article on Andrew 28:21 - Elon Musk, Therapy and Akaash's mom 35:01 - Joe Rogan Therapized Andrew 37:57 - Andrew Tate is the most influential Andrew ...41:36 - Sri Lankans storm the capital 46:12 - Doja Cat DM Etiquette 54:45 - Minions movie, Drake and power of memes 01:16:39 - Brad Pitt's Face Blindness 01:17:50 - Twerking Senator 01:19:07 - Avalanche in Kyrgyzstan + is ice, water? 01:24:48 - Airdropping Meat on airplane 01:27:45 - European Fashion is BAD 01:31:28 - Would you drink Beyonce's Hot Sauce? 01:36:47 - Andrew discovers seasoning

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Yo, do y'all know who Andrew Tate is? I've heard of this guy. Hey, do you guys have any idea? Have you ever heard of this individual, Andrew Tate? Do you guys know who he is? Has he come up on your feed at all? You know, and now that you mention it. He has?
Starting point is 00:00:15 Quite a bit. What does that say about us? We hate bitches or what, bro? My feed is inundated. We're all laughing because I was joking around before about how this has never happened before in internet history. I literally believe sincerely
Starting point is 00:00:31 and I mean this. You thought that I was being hyperbolic. I don't. I'm not. I don't. Never before has this happened in history. A guy that lives in Romania and does what he does there, which is own casinos, apparently has slaves? That's the craziest thing.
Starting point is 00:00:48 Slaves. You can't just say people have slaves. That's the allegation. Female sex slaves? That makes it better. I don't know what it is. I don't know the rules of Romania. My point is,
Starting point is 00:01:00 he is showing up on my feed non-stop. Non-stop, dude. I'm not clicking on it. It's just next video is him in that accent, which I don't know what the fuck country that is. Y'all be trying to figure that shit out, too. God damn it, bro. It's non-stop, yo.
Starting point is 00:01:13 Y'all are so cap. You cook about every single video. After a while. What crazy shit this guy going to say to a woman's face right now? This is kind of impressive. I'm just saying, has this ever happened before? Has one person, has one person. Can I name one? Go, go. Joe Rogan.
Starting point is 00:01:30 Maybe. Maybe Joe Rogan. Joe Rogan has the biggest podcast on the planet. Yeah, I know. That's my fist. He still shows up on the feed less. Yeah. And the entire media is attacking him on a daily basis. Nobody's done what Andrew Taylor's done.
Starting point is 00:01:47 Honestly? I'll be honest. He's not being crazy though. Who else has done this? Name a person. Y'all be laughing at boldness just to laugh at boldness? But we can't be a little bold on this podcast? Make some proclamations? Everybody has done this. Who? Kim K.
Starting point is 00:02:03 When she broke the internet. You had TikTok? she's not doing that on a daily basis bro on a daily basis no I actually think his point is unknown people Haram Kanye
Starting point is 00:02:15 he was doing it almost I think his point is unknown people unknown Kanye Kim K that's it Kim K is a celebrity
Starting point is 00:02:23 that has a whole media apparatus dedicated to her being famous. This guy. Was a decent kickboxer. Pretty good, I guess. I don't know. Maybe really good. I don't know. But we don't fuck with kickboxing like that.
Starting point is 00:02:33 He was born here, though. And he's British American. Why do we know this? Yeah. Why does he have this accent? But I was trying to say before, and you got shit on it, but I think that he needs to be Hunter Biden's life coach. And I mean that. And I mean that.
Starting point is 00:02:47 You guys think I'm joking about this. I do. I need a justification. I'm going to make one up as we go. But listen, Hunter Biden hates his dad. Right. Hates his dad. Who handles people with daddy issues better?
Starting point is 00:03:01 Andrew. Andrew motherfucking T. That's pretty good, yo. I just did it in the moment. That's pretty good, yo. I got to give you credit. I'm like, hey, buy the special, motherfucking T. That's pretty good. I just did it in the moment. That's pretty good. Buy the special, motherfuckers. Buy the special. Real talk.
Starting point is 00:03:13 How do you know he hates his dad? Why do you think he hates his dad? Hunter Biden? Yeah. There's no way you don't. Bro, he's videotaping himself doing incriminating things. The only reason you would do that, the only reason is you hope that somebody would find it and then it would ruin your dad's life.
Starting point is 00:03:28 If you're a white guy doing crack, you're only doing it to piss your father off. You hate your dad. I don't even know how you get access to crack as a white guy. He's trying to numb the pain because his dad is sick. You're not playing air guitar with your leg? That's not air, though. You're playing your leg.
Starting point is 00:03:44 That's leg guitar. That's what Hunter Biden's doing right now, dude. He's somewhere in a Motel 6 just strumming away on his thigh as some crack whore weighs the crack. It's a lot of crack. I may be doing a lot of crack. It was short. She was short. Who was short?
Starting point is 00:03:59 Shorty was short, right? Yeah, exactly. Come on, bro. You've watched all the videos? Of whom? Of Hunter Biden. Come on, bro. Fuck. Come on. You've watched all the videos? Of whom? Of Hunter Biden. No, Andrew Tate. Yes.
Starting point is 00:04:08 Because Hunter Biden don't got the media. Listen. Yeah, yeah. Listen. Hunter Biden has literally Valid point. Coming.
Starting point is 00:04:15 Fox News, News One, all the other truth platforms. Mark. Right? Mark. Right? 4chan. All of them
Starting point is 00:04:24 are nonstop all day Trying to push out information About Hunter Biden I don't see close to as many videos As I see of Andrew Tate On a regular motherfucking basis Am I about to bust out My YouTube shorts right now
Starting point is 00:04:35 Am I about to test this right now Here's what's crazy I've been seeing him on TikTok TikTok Wow Do you know what I'm saying He everywhere yo He unstoppable
Starting point is 00:04:44 Instagram YouTube shorts TikTok, Instagram, YouTube shorts You're wearing your YouTube shorts right now on TikTok. TikTok. Wow. Do you know what I'm saying? He everywhere, yo. He unstoppable. TikTok, Instagram, YouTube shorts. You're wearing your YouTube shorts right now. What are you talking about? You got your YouTube shorts on right now.
Starting point is 00:04:57 Oh, fuck you. All I'm trying to say is Hunter Biden got the serious daddy issues. He's trying, he resents his father for caring so much about politics and not about the family at all. It's something.
Starting point is 00:05:08 Okay? Yeah. Alright. I think we can all get on board. You're not getting on board, son of a bitch pancakes. What? Pancakes? Yeah. I just need to add something. I need to add one more thing. With Andrew Tate, it's not just popping up on your thing.
Starting point is 00:05:23 Because he asked all of us and we all agreed you're just being pussy right now. It's coming up a lot. You ever get in a fight with your girl and then just Tate it up for an hour? No. You don't do that? Cobra Tate.
Starting point is 00:05:38 You gotta swipe on some Tate. That's it. Cobra Tate. That's his whole thing. I think that was him as a kickboxer. His thing was Cobra. I don't know how I know that,
Starting point is 00:05:49 but I know that. You don't know these things, bro. Y'all know about the man. It's okay. No, he's undeniably funny. You can't even act like a guy not funny. He's funny.
Starting point is 00:05:57 Yeah, he's funny. He's funny, bro. Put a girl's body count on her forehead. Solve all the problems in the world. He said that to a woman. He goes, her forehead solve all the problems in the world. He said that to a woman. He goes, you could solve all the problems in the world
Starting point is 00:06:09 if you put a woman's body count on her forehead. Oh my god, man. Come on now, son. Now, how does that help anything? I don't know, but Hunter Biden needs that. Hunter Biden needs that. Because he's breaking up the nuclear family. Yeah, that's fire.
Starting point is 00:06:27 But what is this? What am I playing now? Oh, that's a ukulele. Yeah! A ukulele. Nice. Look at that. Oh, my gosh.
Starting point is 00:06:36 You're laughing beach into that, bro. Come on. I don't know what a ukulele is. You've never heard of a ukulele? A uke? A uke. You've never seen a fat Hawaiian play a uke? You've never played a uke?
Starting point is 00:06:48 Oh, that's that. I thought that was the banjo. Where over the rainbow I did hear a ukulele. We put Barack Obama and the other black people They no live on the island I didn't know you spoke pidgin. What?
Starting point is 00:07:02 You speak pidgin. Come on, brother. Nice. Come on, brother. Shoot, brother What? You speak pigeon. Come on, brother. Nice. Come on, bro. Shoot, brother. Of course I speak the pigeon, brother. How's it? How is it?
Starting point is 00:07:11 How's it? Where the fat bitches with no ass at? Where the big, small women with no ass ass look like a trier? Talk story. Talk story. They gonna fuck you up. Just not gonna let me at Walmart. Remember that girl that did the,
Starting point is 00:07:27 she did security at Walmart? A dude was trying to steal? Body slammed. She was a hero. What did she do? She body slammed the motherfucker trying to steal. Oh, damn. And then Dana White invited her
Starting point is 00:07:37 to the fucking UFC press conference. Yeah, for real. Genius move. Guys, this Sunday is the day. Infamous. We gotta break some fucking records, guys. Okay? Spread the word.
Starting point is 00:07:48 So many of you already posted about it. So many of you have already told your friends, told your family. We changed the game this Sunday. It is up to you guys. TheAndrewSchultz.com, okay? You go order that special right now. We are all watching it Sunday, 9 p.m. Eastern Standard Time. We're going live afterwards here.
Starting point is 00:08:06 You can get that and fashion merch and everything all available at dandrushultz.com. Also, crazy thing happened. One of the biggest gambling platforms on the planet, BetOnline, and us are partnered, and they're doing something absolutely crazy. Not only are they flying out the 10 people to watch it with us live, they're also going to put a $15 bet in every single person who orders the specials account if they open it up, account and bet online. That means you go buy the special for $15. You get that $15 bet in your account. It doesn't matter if you already have an account or if you're going to open one. This is the infamous stimulus coming into your motherfucking pockets. And if I'm you,
Starting point is 00:08:47 I'm putting that shit on a crazy parlay and trying to win a million fucking dollars. You could actually make money off of this special. That is crazy. And if you do, make sure you tag my ass and I want a piece of it, motherfucker.
Starting point is 00:09:01 Okay? I appreciate y'all so much for supporting me in all seriousness. This Sunday, it goes down. We see if we can make a little history. Spread the word.'all so much for supporting me in all seriousness this sunday it goes down we see if we can make a little history spread the word thank you so much for your support peace anyway hunter biden got the serious daddy issues okay crazy daddy issues doing the crack doing the coke doing hookers and prostitutes and filming it all knowing full well he could destroy his father's legacy and ruin any chance at being in politics. Maybe he wants his father to get out of politics so he can have his life back.
Starting point is 00:09:29 Imagine growing up under that microscope. You can't do anything. Or you can do everything and get away with it. You just got to be a little subtle about it. Like, Hunter could be doing all the crack he wants right now. If he didn't fucking tape himself, none of us would ever know. His whole life, cracked up. None of us would know. That's facts. Best whole life, cracked up. None of us would know.
Starting point is 00:09:47 That's facts. Best crack. Purest crack. Eh, none of us would know. Instead, he's filming himself putting it out. He filmed himself weighing the crack. Who are you even sending that to? This is incriminating evidence. And he started on the front phasing, too. You didn't even have to start on the front phasing. You could deny. That's not my voice.
Starting point is 00:10:03 They're doing voiceover or whatever that thing is. What is it called? CGI. Not CGI. Deep fake. You see this one? What's this one? Hunter Biden slip sliding naked. There's no way. This is fantastic. You got a thang on him? He got a little thang. I'm telling you. His shmeet is actually
Starting point is 00:10:18 decent. Let me see that shmeet. Let me see that shmeet. This guy is hilarious. The more videos I'm seeing of this guy, Shmang. Let me see that. Shmang. Woohoo. This guy is hilarious. The more videos I'm seeing of this guy, I'm like, I kind of want to hang with him. Yeah, he's a fun time, dude. Yeah, dude. He might be the white Andrew Tate. This guy's living his best life.
Starting point is 00:10:35 We're all just watching it. Yo. He looks good for a crackhead. Still got his teeth. Playing with his little thang-a-lang. Yeah. That thang, my boy. This guy's awesome.
Starting point is 00:10:50 Yeah. He's just playing. He's stretching out that thang. Yeah, yeah. He getting it on medium soft. He getting it ready. He getting it ready. He getting it ready.
Starting point is 00:10:57 He got the cold water. He got to get the camera ready, you know? No, no, no. I feel that. I respect that 100%. He might be a patron. Honestly, I want him to submit
Starting point is 00:11:04 a patron to Questiony. Let me see. Do we have any videos of him smashing anything? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, there's one of them. Yeah. Wait, for real? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:12 He's beating box? Yeah, the camera angle's all fucked up, though. Yeah. So this is an interesting one. This is allegedly a woman. And you got these ready, huh? Who's tied up with a bag over her head doing some bondage stuff. He's also putting out a sandwich and maybe a croissant.
Starting point is 00:11:28 He got her in that portnoy right there. He might have a chocolate croissant also. Okay. But maybe this is like a... That's a good time. She's trying to get over a carb addiction or something like that. This is like, we're going to put it as close to you as possible so that you can learn how to control yourself.
Starting point is 00:11:44 Or it's a fetish. I think he could be helping this girl. I think there's no proof at all that he's doing some sort of sadomasochistic ritual. I think that that girl had a serious, like she might have body dysmorphia or something like that. Now this is a little bit more incriminating. This one is him with... Two girls that drink Monster. But he's just hanging.
Starting point is 00:12:06 He's just hanging out. He looks great. He looks amazing. This is great. I like this guy. Yo, you know what we got to give a little bit of respect to? What's that? The British royal family.
Starting point is 00:12:16 I know this is hard for you. Yeah, it is. You too. And me. More me than you. Because my people went through way more. Also, this is the shmeet one right here okay wait
Starting point is 00:12:27 hold on hold on what's that thing next to him that's a woman he's a thing Andrew Tate over here chill bro
Starting point is 00:12:36 yeah Haram dude but he's just kind of like getting it he's just stroking meat wait are y'all an over stroker wait don't put him on the why are we y'all why are we y'all an overstroker? Wait, don't put him on the line.
Starting point is 00:12:47 Why are we y'all? Why are we y'all? Hunter's not a very white, white guy. Let's be honest. But he just... You know, he's just overhead with it. What, you don't ever hit it with the overhand? I mean, yo.
Starting point is 00:12:59 Hunter could be a rapper, dog. Yo, he's fucking and he pulls out the Glock. That's fire, dog. So he's fully naked and he pulls out the Glock, bro. It's unbelievable. That's fire, dog. So he's fully naked. He's about to hit it from the back. Do some ASMR with this. Oh, yeah. Come on.
Starting point is 00:13:11 He's your new king. Yeah. Come on, bro. Yo, do we even need Chet Hanks anymore? No. How does this affect his legacy, you think? Real talk. You think this affects Chet's legacy?
Starting point is 00:13:22 If he has a Jamaican accent, I don't even think we ever listen to Chet again. Chet got his life together. Chet got his Andrew Tate on. I think this is the real white boy summer. Hunter Biden started true white boy summer. 100%, bro. Shouts to Hunter Biden. Anyway, Andrew Tate can get your life around if you want, turn you into a cam boy.
Starting point is 00:13:39 Do they have cam boys? I don't know. Is that just Twitch streamers? Yeah. Is that what that is? Might just be Twitch streamers. But that what that is? Might just be Twitch streamers. But that's actually
Starting point is 00:13:46 a good business. Now, can we have Andrew Tate on the podcast? That's the question. I mean, he is funny. He is funny. Do we have to see how this sex slavery
Starting point is 00:13:58 trial goes? That's probably a good idea. I forgot. Son, if you're funny enough to make me forget a sex slavery trial, I gotta give you credit
Starting point is 00:14:05 on humor at least. You know what I mean? Hey. He's been charged with something. It's an accusation. I think he got raided or something like that. Oh, wow. I don't know how I know these things.
Starting point is 00:14:15 I don't know how I know. Wow. I don't know how I know. You know what I mean? I mean, why? Actually, I found out from you, to be honest. I told you this? Yes.
Starting point is 00:14:23 But because he had 75 bitches living with him. Yeah, bro. Yeah. He had 75 bitches. Yeah. 75 cam girls. Slots. Doing whatever I want.
Starting point is 00:14:34 I want a robot. Hey, who gets the money from those cam girls? I get the money. Those girls get like 25%. Bitch. Wait, why? Why are you only giving them 25%? Well, because a man needs 75 so i could
Starting point is 00:14:46 work on my judo other things his actual response to that was uh yeah the selling my product i'm not gonna let him sell my product without giving me a cut i was like damn andrew day's going in no that's funny man listen no it's a joke it's funny to fuck up i feel a lot he cracks me the fuck up if it's a joke, it's funny. If it's a joke, it's funny. If it's a joke, it's funny. If it's a joke, it's funny. I feel a lot. He cracks me the fuck up. If it's a joke, it's funny. If it's serious,
Starting point is 00:15:09 it's kind of concerning. If you take him seriously, a little bit is on you. And as long as he don't insult his own race of women, which I don't even know what they are, I'm fine with the guy. I need to know
Starting point is 00:15:16 where the fuck he's from. I need to know what that accent is. He's half black. He's half black. Yeah. He's British American, born in the US,
Starting point is 00:15:24 grew up in London, something Romania. That's it. That's where he was doing his fighting, his kickboxing. He had a bar, though, that was kind of fire. He said, bitch. That's it. He had a bar that was kind of fire. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:41 No, no. No, no. He had a boy who was kind of fired. He's like, he likes Romania because it is, the corruption is available to everyone. Oh, that's fire. Something like this. I'm paraphrasing, but it's like, if you live in the West, the corruption is only available to the billionaires. They can get away with stuff.
Starting point is 00:15:59 They can pay the lawyers. They can pay out the government. They can do all those influence. But like in Romania, I can pay off a policeman and he won't give me a ticket. I can pay off this person. I can get things done with bribes. I love that it's corrupt and that corruption is available to everyone. Now, what is everyone?
Starting point is 00:16:11 Like there are people who don't have the money to actually be corrupt. But the fact that it's available to more, it's an interesting look on corruption. No, I really do kind of look at him like a stand-up. Like I don't take this all seriously,
Starting point is 00:16:20 but these are interesting points of view at the very least. That's an interesting point of view on corruption. And it makes me laugh too. That's what you were saying as running for president. You're like, tax fraud, everyone can do it. Everybody can do tax fraud.
Starting point is 00:16:29 Hey! Hey! Bitches for everyone. Wait, really? Everyone gets a cam girl. Bitch. What? Really?
Starting point is 00:16:37 Yeah, I think everybody should get a cam girl. Don't you? Have a little cam girl in your house? Wait, in your house? You have to keep them? Yeah, you get a nice little cam girl room. She goes in your house. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:47 Do you need some food, bitch? She's speaking to you? Calling you a bitch? No, I'm speaking to her. You're not taking care of her. She's taking care of you. Dude, Al is entertaining. It's the craziest fucking.
Starting point is 00:17:01 I was just thinking earlier today, every time Al used to bring up. That's right. I was bringing her food. Yeah. Oh, do you need you to bring yourself some food, bitch? Yeah, there we go. Black and white as you take.
Starting point is 00:17:12 Never in history has this happened. Never. Never. This guy is so stupid. If he runs for president, he winning, bro. He's winning, bro. He's winning if he runs for president.
Starting point is 00:17:23 He's the most famous Romanian any of y'all ever heard of in your life that's not true Dracula he's Transylvanian where the fuck you think that is you dumb retards no Transylvania is it's own thing inside Romania
Starting point is 00:17:35 yeah but it operates on it's own nah he's stupid I guarantee Transylvania is inside Romania it's under it's own jurisdiction castle Dracula brand castles in Romania. He didn't say anything about that. He didn't say anything about that. Don't get us suing.
Starting point is 00:17:57 Let's accept this as true for this argument. Who been in your news feed more, Andrew Tate or Dracula, you dork? I haven't seen Dracula one time. Dracula's been mad silent. To be fair, I— Dracula got nobody on TikTok. Yeah, Dracula got no bitches, bro. Can I be honest with you right now?
Starting point is 00:18:10 I think the most famous bloodsucker in Romania is definitely Andrew Tate. If I'm being honest with you— Thank you! If there's one person that sustains himself off of the lives of innocent people, I think it might be Andrew Tate. I signed up for his newsletter. Really? And his course? Hustler is you.
Starting point is 00:18:33 For real, I have. I don't know why they go up. Andrew Tate, can you help me? Can you help me with my pants, please? You need Andrew Taylor, bro. Fuck Andrew Tate. He's back, big buddy You need Andrew Taylor, bro. Fuck Andrew Taylor. There we go. He's back, big buddy. He's back,
Starting point is 00:18:48 buddy. No, for real. Andrew Tate, we need you. We need you to fix America. We need you to fix Hunter Biden. What else do we need him to fix? Is there anything else? That's basically it. I think he can fix a lot of the world's problems. Islam can use it. They don't understand what's haram and what's not, clearly. He's the guy that's telling you. And Andrew Tate got that of the world's problems. Islam can use a help. They don't understand what haram was.
Starting point is 00:19:05 Not clearly. He's the guy that- And Andrew Tate got that? He seems to know haram. Is this what it felt like when Islam was taking over? Fun? The crusades. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:19:15 Like when a new religion was coming around. Is this what it was like? It's like, oh, damn. I'm seeing these crosses everywhere. Is that cross shit lit? Do you know what I mean? I'm trying to understand. Are we going through a cultural revolution of Tate-ism?
Starting point is 00:19:26 Last person to do this like this? Jesus. Popping up in all your feeds. Mohamed. Popping up. Mohamed. Mohamed was probably the last. He's the prophet.
Starting point is 00:19:35 Andrew Tate is the prophet. He might be the newest version of a religion. And a religion of keep your bitch in line. It's just your phone. There's probably some people listening to this that have no idea. The more I argue with my wife, the more the videos pop up. You know how you're talking about toasters
Starting point is 00:19:52 and all of a sudden you get the ad on Instagram for a toaster? That's what I have with Andrew Tate. Me and my wife are arguing and then these Tates pop up and I'm looking at my wife like, You got no idea what's coming. She got no idea. It, it's over for her. Once I start to tell her, body count your head.
Starting point is 00:20:10 You know what I'm saying? Body count your head. Have you played any of his videos in front of him? To my wife? Yeah. Do I ever play videos on no volume? When I walk into a room, have I ever played a video without full volume? When she hears you shitting and listening to that.
Starting point is 00:20:24 She cowers in fear. When a real man is in town, when that alpha is in town, it really feels like a wolf cry. Yeah, that's the wrong answer, though. The real answer is who cares what a woman thinks? That's your motherfucking choice, son! You're finally
Starting point is 00:20:40 Indian, bro. You finally shed all that British shit. That's some real ass Indian shit. I'm getting Muslim finally. I'm converting. Yo, finally. Yes. Also, happy 7-Eleven day, bro.
Starting point is 00:20:52 Oh, hey, thanks, dog. Yo, I got you. I got you. Bring back Apu. Uh-huh. Yo, is it? Oh, that's right. It's 7-Eleven.
Starting point is 00:20:57 Yeah. Shit. We got to go get a Slurpee. Yeah, I guess we do. Let me fix my fucking expensive watch. Oh, alpha move right there. This shit fix my fucking expensive watch. Alpha move right there. This shit don't work. Look.
Starting point is 00:21:11 Okay. But in all seriousness, I'll probably have to sell this if you guys don't buy the special. So if you guys can go buy it. Not according to TMZ. Not according to TMZ. These motherfuckers is capped. That's something I learned this week about articles.
Starting point is 00:21:27 They don't be reaching out for comment. They right at the bottom reached out for comment. I'm not hearing from none of these motherfuckers. Yeah, what does that mean? They just said it out loud? Yeah. Yo, Andrew, what you think? Open the window.
Starting point is 00:21:40 Andrew, do you have a comment? Nothing. And then they fucking run that article. They'll call an agency's receptionist. Hey, does Andrew... I'm like, what? Okay, we did it. And we know my agency does nothing for me.
Starting point is 00:21:50 Useless. They're useless. So, of course, they're not going to hit me back with this. Except you, TJ. You're the fucking man. Get out of the woods. TJ been in the shire since the motherfucking tour stopped. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:01 Really? Oh, yeah. Where's the shire? I don't know. But every time I go on Instagram, that motherfucker in the woods listening to Andrew Tate jerking dicks. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:22:10 I didn't know that. Yo, y'all never go out on a nice little camping trip with some Tate. Y'all never went on a camping trip with some Tate. It's getting all weird now, bro. I'm just saying,
Starting point is 00:22:21 you go on a camping trip and then you see how animals interact with one another, you're like, that's the shit. That's fucking primal life, bro. I'm just saying, you go to the cave, and then you see how animals interact with one another. You're like, that's the shit. Yeah. That's fucking primal life, bro. Mother nature.
Starting point is 00:22:29 Mother nature. Father nature, really. Hey, hey, hey. Does the male lion go out and hunt? Who hunts? I think the female lion. Yeah. The bitches.
Starting point is 00:22:37 Okay. The lion bitches go out and get the food. Yeah. And then I come eat the food. My bitches get for me Yeah Do you know what happens to a lying bitch If she fucks too many people? What?
Starting point is 00:22:56 They discard of her body Whoa Is that a real thing? No I don't think so Didn't think I was gonna get much pushback It wasn't properly prepared i'm pretty sure male lions got a fight to fuck the female is that right i mean most animals yeah thank god we don't
Starting point is 00:23:13 gotta still do that thank god bro bro you gotta narrate andrew day's gotta narrate an actual like a full national geographic oh yes documentary oh i think this is i think he's about to. Oh, wow. Hyena. What's that thing hanging out of his dick? Did you see that fucking water? No, he's packing, bro. He might have just been peeing, I think. Oh, it was a little piss stream?
Starting point is 00:23:36 Yeah. The hyena by himself. Wow, dude. Oh, zebras don't give a fuck, bro. Right? That's a good point. That's a crazy kind of horse. Zebra a little thick, though. Ze, zebras don't give a fuck, bro. Right? That's a good point. That's a crazy kind of horse. Zebra a little thick, though.
Starting point is 00:23:48 Yeah. Zebra a little thick. Yeah, they got crazy thumbtacks. But have you thought it, was it all curious to you guys that nobody has a pet zebra or nobody rides that? Yeah, that's a good point, actually. There's a reason. Wait, why?
Starting point is 00:24:02 Can't domesticate them. Why not? Can't domesticate a zebra. Why? Why? I mean, you can domesticate them. Why not? Can't domesticate a zebra. Why? I mean, you can domesticate them. What animal? You're acting like that's the only animal you can't domesticate. No, there's other animals you can't domesticate.
Starting point is 00:24:12 You can't domesticate a white shark or a thresher shark or a whale shark. Really? I feel like you can domesticate a whale shark. What about an elk? Can't domesticate them. Yeah. So I feel like there's a lot of animals. You can domesticate reindeer, but you can't domesticate a zebra.
Starting point is 00:24:27 Say again? Reindeer are big. No, no, no. They're big. Not that little. I saw a little ass one in New York. I pet them motherfuckers. Yeah, bro.
Starting point is 00:24:34 Same. Probably a baby one. That might have been a baby. They grow pretty big. You know the difference between babies and full grown things? No. And Romans didn't know that either. Listen, this is serious and I need you guys to take it serious.
Starting point is 00:24:49 Zebras are undomesticatable. You can't do it. You can't do it. I think you say that like it's unique. That's a lot of animals. A lion. It looks just like very domesticatable. You hop on the back of a horse, and it's your bitch.
Starting point is 00:25:02 But then this horse, you cannot do it. That's not shocking. And a mule. You can do that with a donkey. Say again? Those are domesticatable donkeys. Of course. I don't even think
Starting point is 00:25:11 they're out there. A bull. They're not even wild. They don't even exist out there. I don't think they're wild. I think they only come domesticated. Is a donkey a horse and then a mule cross?
Starting point is 00:25:26 That's a good ass point, bro. Or a mule is a horse and then a mule cross? That's a good point, bro. Or a mule is a horse and another animal. A mule is maybe a horse and a donkey. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, guys, we're going to take a break for a second because I got to help you out with your skin. Okay, fellas, here's the reality. We don't give a fuck about our skin. And why?
Starting point is 00:25:38 Because we think it's an intimidating thing to do. We think it's too much work. We look at our wives, look at our girlfriends. They're taking up 14 shelves with all these different lotions. They're nighttime routine. They got all these masks and everything all over their face. We look at our wives, look at our girlfriends. They're taking up 14 shelves with all these different lotions. They're nighttime routine. They got all these masks and everything all over their face. We don't know what the fuck is going on. We're like, I don't need to be part of that.
Starting point is 00:25:51 Well, that's not the case. Geology has made it simple. They have figured out your daily routine. Now, I know what you're thinking. They're going, well, how do they know my skin? Well, you take a test so they figure out what your skin is. And then you have your geology creams curated for your skin. Think about that. 30-second test, for the record. 30-second test. Oh, yeah, it's 30 seconds.
Starting point is 00:26:11 It's a 30-second test. It's nothing, and then you have your exact cream set up for you to work for you so you can look good. It's not that difficult. In the night, in the morning, they got some under eye cream if you're trying to look real cute. They've simplified the whole process because they know that we like it simple. And ladies, if you're listening right now and you want to get your man on something so he stops looking absolutely repulsive, geology is the one. And here's the reality. Geology is offering you an exclusive 70% off. But you don't just get their award-winning, best-selling eye cream.
Starting point is 00:26:43 You get a whole five-piece custom skincare routine. That's a $50 value for 15 bucks. Think about that. The eye cream alone retails for 45. So this is a hell of a deal. Go to geology.com, G-E-O-L-O-G-I-E.com. Take a quick 30-second diagnostic quiz to get your personalized skincare number and use the promo code flagrant to get your personalized trial set for 70% off. Let's get back to the show. I need to tell you about the best underwear in the business. Plain and simple.
Starting point is 00:27:09 It's Culprits. I don't even know if you can get down here and see. I got them on, okay? That's all you need to know. Your boy loves the Culprits. I've literally put these underwear on, and I haven't worn another pair of underwear, another brand of underwear since.
Starting point is 00:27:23 They are the best underwear in the game, plain and simple. I defy you to find a better pair of underwear, another brand of underwear since. They are the best underwear in the game, plain and simple. I defy you to find a better pair of underwear. Honestly, I'm telling you this right now. The fact that we even offer a discount is crazy because they're going to be the best underwear you ever put on in your life. Why should that even need to be discounted? But this is what we do. We take care of you. And if you go to culpritunderwear.com right now, use the code FLANGER, you're going to get 25% off, which is ludicrous. Now, if some of you are dorks and you care about the environment or what fabric, micromodal, all this other nonsense, yeah, it's got all that. Literally, it's the best thing for the environment. It's the best thing for micromodal, whatever that means. I didn't even bother listening to it because I could care less when it comes to underwear. All I care about is, does it make my package feel comfortable
Starting point is 00:28:08 and look amazing? Yes, it does. CulpritUnderwear.com, okay? Code is flagrant. Get the 25% off and enjoy your fucking life. Let's get back to the show. Why is your boy Elon trying to duck out of this Twitter thing? First of all, did I not call this? Yeah, I think we all said this, right? Wow. You just took your whole shit. Did I not put the stamp down on Twitter and now everybody's taking my joke? Wait, what was the
Starting point is 00:28:35 stamp? Before he pulled out, I said Twitter's about to be the only deal that, no, I said Twitter's about to be the only thing Musk pulls out of because he just had the twins with the whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now everybody taking my shit, bro. The joke, not the story, the prediction. I don't know, guys.
Starting point is 00:28:54 What do you want from me, bro? What do you want right now? No, no. Yeah, the joke. Just the joke. But I didn't actually think that he was about to pull out. I thought that he would go through with it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:04 For the most part, I thought this wasn't real from the beginning. There to pull out. I thought that he would go through with it. Yeah. But now he doesn't. For the most part, I thought this wasn't real from the beginning. There was a moment. What about for not the most? Like, what about the small part? There was a moment where I thought. Yeah, what did you. The small part.
Starting point is 00:29:13 Yeah, well, wait. Tell us about the small part. What that was for you. When they actually agreed to $44 billion, I was like, oh, am I wrong? But I'm not wrong. I should have more faith in myself. And then what happened emotionally after that for you? What was that like?
Starting point is 00:29:23 Wow. So, he just got into therapy. Just? I go back to third grade, my boy. I'm an OG of these therapies. Therapy just started working. But what was that like emotionally for you? What was that like? And how does that relate to your relationship with your parents?
Starting point is 00:29:38 Yes. You know what? Yo, all therapy is, yo, your parents fucked you up. That's all therapy is. It's not your fault. Yeah. Okay, so how does that relate to that? Oof, you know what? I'm not used to ever being wrong because my mom always tells me I'm right.
Starting point is 00:29:51 So it was very devastating. I didn't mean it, but I pulled it out. I mean, I got there. Is that true? Yeah. Well, my mom thinks I'm perfect for sure. Yeah. But I'm-
Starting point is 00:30:01 She's telling me this as cat, like- Really? Thank God. That's a lot of pressure. What did Thank God. That's a lot of pressure. What did she say? That's a lot of pressure. She said he's not perfect. I wish my mom treated me
Starting point is 00:30:08 the way Andrew's mom treats him. So you feel pressure to be perfect because your mom... Yeah, bro. She thinks I'm perfect all the time. Wow.
Starting point is 00:30:21 I'll tell her. If I told her I smoke weed this Rogan episode, she'd be like, yeah, but it wasn't like real. And I'd be like, has she seen you, bro? What do you mean?
Starting point is 00:30:30 Damn, man. You mean I'm not attractive? Because I think a lot of you could get fucked, I think. Wait a minute. God damn, Al. That was like a really insulting sentence. No, but I thought perfect for...
Starting point is 00:30:40 I didn't care for you to expand on it. There we go. No, no, no. But even though you didn't become a doctor or engineer, she still thinks you're perfect. It don't matter. Really? What if she saw you weighing crack? What if she saw you weighing crack on the internet?
Starting point is 00:30:55 Be honest. She would be like, who are you doing that for? What if she saw you naked going down a slide? What would she say then? She'd be like, damn, dude, I thought you had a bigger dick than that. Calls you dude. Yeah. Yeah, she saw it like that. She's like,, damn, dude, I thought you had a bigger dick than that. Called you dude. Yeah. Yeah, she saw it like that.
Starting point is 00:31:07 She's like, you would think with my breasts, you know, you would just think. Yo, you didn't suck enough milk out them times, bro. I think not, dude. When do you stop sucking? What age? I don't know, to be honest. Really? 18, probably.
Starting point is 00:31:19 Months? 18 months. I was making a little wisecrack. Oh. Oh, oh, oh. A little wisecrack. My bad. I was a late sucker wisecrack. Oh. A little wisecrack. My bad. I was a late sucker.
Starting point is 00:31:26 My mom told me. Really? I don't blame you, dog. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What did you got to do? Wait, for real? How late? I was like six.
Starting point is 00:31:35 I was like six. But you had teeth, dog. Say again? You had full teeth. Oh, I'd let her know. If there was none left, I'd take a nibble. Slap the back like Franzia? Hell yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:44 I'd be like, hey, do what you got to do, ma. I don't know how you get more milk in. I believe this, too. For real. I would tell her, I'm like, mom, you better do some push-ups or something. You know what I mean? You better work chest this week
Starting point is 00:31:55 because this tap is dry. You know what I mean, mom? My mom watches this shit. What's up, mom? Yo, she got to be a guest. We got to get her on. Say again? We got to get her on.
Starting point is 00:32:03 No, we are going to get her on. I told you this. No. We got it. I got locked in. I have the date and I have absolutely everything. It's gonna go. What date? I can't say. Secret. Yeah, it's a secret. Okay.
Starting point is 00:32:17 It is a secret. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sure. That's it. What do you want to talk about? What do you guys want to talk about, you sick fucks? You want to talk about a What are you going to interview about? What do you guys want to talk about, you sick fucks? You want to talk about a 70-woman... I'm going to shoot about you shooting my mom at our wedding. What did I do? Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:35 I didn't say that. You hit her with a heavy one, Tommy. I didn't say it. That was knee-jerk reaction. I can't do anything. If I see them, it comes out of me. It's not like I want to. Same, dude.
Starting point is 00:32:44 It's like a burp. You can say it around my mom. Knee-j comes out of me. It's not like I want to. Same. You can say it around my mom. Knee jerk, bro. Say what? Knee jerk. It's a knee jerk, you know? It's just a different type of jerk. That's all it is.
Starting point is 00:32:56 Do you see me making sex jokes? Give it to them now. He does make sex jokes, man. Sex jokes? They feel less disrespectful than yours. Why? Because I get a chance to say it to your mom. Why would that make mine more disrespectful?
Starting point is 00:33:06 It's the same amount of disrespect. The more disrespectful you are, the more justifiable it is when I see your mom and I go, eh. You can do the whole thing.
Starting point is 00:33:14 It's fine. It's 100% okay. You don't look fine. Hey, hey, do this again. I had a dream about your mom last night. Yo.
Starting point is 00:33:23 Yo. It wasn't bad. It wasn't bad.. Yo! Yo! It wasn't bad. It wasn't bad. It wasn't bad. On 7-11 day, don't do this. Don't do this. Juneteenth for Indians, be cool, bro. You still got it, girl.
Starting point is 00:33:35 No, listen. Yo. Listen. This guy's crazy. Listen, listen. I was wearing a pinky ring. What's going on, bro? What's happening?
Starting point is 00:33:44 Okay. No, it wasn't a bad dream it wasn't anything sexual or anything I just happened to have a dream okay it was her it was
Starting point is 00:33:56 it was fucking it was like a like a alright Charlie Murphy get it out okay it was a scooter Charlie Murphy yeah it was it out. It was a scooter.
Starting point is 00:34:05 Charlie Murphy? Yeah, it was me. It was Eddie. Yeah, it was a crazy thing. Wow. A scooter? Just give him a second. It was a scooter, dude.
Starting point is 00:34:18 It was a scooter. Okay. Like a Vespa? No. Oh. Like a Razor? Like a Razor scooter. That's it like a razor? Yeah, like a razor. Like a razor scooter. That's it.
Starting point is 00:34:28 I was just doing tricks on a ramp. What do you think that means? How does that affect your relationship with your parents, do you think? I think my parents let me go to rollerblading camp once, and I got a concussion there, and I wish that maybe they didn't allow me to do that. Yeah, is that their fault you got a concussion? Yeah, they didn't care about my safety enough. It's kind of wild to let your kid do extreme sports as a young'un, don't you think? That's when you're most resilient.
Starting point is 00:34:50 You hit your head, you bounce back. Do you bounce back? I don't know that you do. I think it might be like permanent damage. I think you're the most susceptible when you're young, actually. Yeah, but then it also could make you into a great comic. You know, hit your head a few times as a kid. Rogan literally thinks that I'm like impulsive because I've had concussions.
Starting point is 00:35:05 Yeah. That makes sense. I got told I had three concussions. He's like, oh, that's probably why you're like a... Damn, Rogan therapied you, bro. Damn, Rogan hit you with this probably because of your childhood. Fuck, bro.
Starting point is 00:35:16 Childhood is crazy, man. Maybe we should take, you know how like, like Elon's doing this thing where he's like, I don't need to take care of my kids until they're adults and then I'll play more of a role. Right? That's crazy. Maybe we should only take care of my kids until they're adults and then I'll play more of a role right that's crazy maybe we should only
Starting point is 00:35:27 take care of the kids for those first six years and then pass it off and then you just like at what point if they get diddled does it not make them trans
Starting point is 00:35:36 no no I'm not saying that by the special sorry that was a joke we're gay we're gay thank god you cleaned it up Thank God you cleaned it up.
Starting point is 00:35:46 Thank God you cleaned it up. At what point does it not turn them into the alphabet if they get touched? Because, like, if I get touched now, I'm not going to be an alphabet. You don't know. Debatable. You don't know that. It also depends who touches you. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:35:58 What do you mean? I bet you get touched into being an alphabet. You know how fucking good you got to be to turn an adult? Who's better at giving blowjobs probably than dudes? Yeah, but like a good blowjob is not going to make you go, oh, I want all men. It's just, it's like, I want Ralph one more time, bro. Yeah. Pussy mouth.
Starting point is 00:36:18 Yeah. Ralph got that fire, bro. Pussy mouth Ralph, bro. You don't know Ralph. Pussy mouth Ralph, bro. Go for it. Pussy mouth Ralph. Pussy mouth Ralph, bro. Go, go. Pussy mouth Ralph. Pussy mouth Ralph.
Starting point is 00:36:27 You don't just run it up with every dude, but Ralph, you're like, all right. Also, guys, Big Dizzy Energy Tour is still going strong. We got a lot of momentum. Saw it at the last, I don't know how many weekends. Let's keep that shit going. This weekend in Minneapolis, Acme Comedy Club. It's supposed to be one of the best comedy clubs in the city.
Starting point is 00:36:42 I know it's the summer in Minneapolis, but stop acting like you got a lot of shit to do. Come to the shows. Let's have some fucking laughs. Let's hang out after this weekend, Thursday through Sunday, July 14th through 16th. Also, San Diego, I'm telling you these shows will sell out. July 28th through 30th, American Comedy Company, one of my favorite clubs in the city. I promise you these shows will sell out, so you need to buy tickets because some of them are already getting close. August 5th and 6th, I'm going to be in Atlantic City, New Jersey. I'm coming back to the city that gave us all COVID. Let's do it one more time. And I'm telling you what, one of these days, I think I'm going to bring the RU Garbage Boys and I'm going to honor
Starting point is 00:37:17 the other half of my bet. Pay $5,000, put it on black, one spin. Let's see what the fuck happens. August 11th through 13th, I'm also hitting Tempe at the Tempe Improv. September 9th and 10th, Orlando, Florida. Mark will probably be there because his fucking anti-vax ass lives there. So, all those dates and more at akashsingh.com. Now, let's get back to the show. Let's do on-air therapy. I think that's what we're missing.
Starting point is 00:37:38 That would be fun. That'd be awesome, right? Yeah. All right, I'll start it. Let's do it. Yeah. You ready to come? My therapist, I already have a therapist, by the way.
Starting point is 00:37:46 Okay. His first name's Andrew. Okay, I got you. Ready? Here we go. Fuck! Hey, girl. Scoreboard.
Starting point is 00:37:55 That was scoreboard right there. That was really good. Yeah. Did I say on the pod yet that somebody thought I was him on the street? I told you guys that, right? I told you guys this. No? On the call.
Starting point is 00:38:04 This is an algorithm in real life bro they thought that i was him somebody came up to me and they're with their girl and they're like oh shit that's my favorite comedian they're like what's up andrew tate and i'm like what i go different andrew bro and he goes i mean shawls oh fuck my bad i'm like this is this guy is the greatest guy in. I was like, at that moment, I realized that he was the most influential human in the history of the internet. Maybe the most influential Andrew.
Starting point is 00:38:31 Fuck you. Wow. Fuck you. You're cool. I didn't do anything. No, he might be the most influential Andrew, honestly.
Starting point is 00:38:39 And it fucking breaks me to say it. It breaks me like one of his bitches. He didn't say it, dude. It really does. It really does. Do we need him on? I think we might have to. Oh, we have to.
Starting point is 00:38:50 I mean, he's so funny. He's funny. It's just a stand-up. Come on. You just have some laughs. Yeah. Should we have him, like, teach Shifty how to get, oh, no. That's not valuable.
Starting point is 00:39:00 Is there anybody single here? Miles, should we? Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, life coaching with Miles would be the best. But Miles already has so many bitches. Yeah, but are they broken? Yeah, that's right. You have girls that are like
Starting point is 00:39:13 interesting thoughts and ideas. Do I have to hear for that? Dove. No, Dove does not need anything. No, he doesn't. No, no, no, no. He wants a woman that he respects and will walk all over him. I mean, they do that already.
Starting point is 00:39:28 Are you simping? None of them walk over me. You're going to simp when you have a Jewish wife. Bro, it's not even... He simps now. No, he doesn't simp now. No, he doesn't simp now. He doesn't simp now.
Starting point is 00:39:37 He doesn't simp now. Thank you. You don't simp now. But with your Jewish wife, you will 100% simp. And she will absolutely obliterate you. But that's okay, though. Exactly. It cultural i am absolutely okay to come back to the home you think there's there's a female entertainer there's a probably a female entertainer she shot fucking tori lane i don't think she shot anybody. Yes, she did. No, she does a lot. Is simping, though,
Starting point is 00:40:05 if she's running shit when she gets home? Yes. If you even have to ask what simping is, you're a fucking simp, bro. Yeah. The crazy thing is
Starting point is 00:40:12 most women probably don't know Andrew Tate exists. That's not true. They're probably not getting the updates all on their Instagram and stuff and on their YouTube shorts. Oh, you think that their
Starting point is 00:40:20 algorithm is different? Yeah, they probably have a female Andrew Tate telling them dating tricks and how to handle their dicks. Oh, God. And how to handle their dicks. Oh, God. Like the dick-sucking chicks. What is it called? Women.
Starting point is 00:40:34 That was fucking sexist. Alex Tate. That was really fucking sexist. No, the fucking Caller Daddy. Oh, okay. Right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, in a way, that could be female Andrew Tate in the early days. Like, OG Caller Daddy. Didn't okay. Right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, in a way, that could be female intraday in the early days.
Starting point is 00:40:46 Like, OG Call Her Daddy. Didn't they change the name to that podcast? Wasn't it like How to Be Lonely When You're 40? Is that the... British.
Starting point is 00:40:55 You have to do it British. Wait, what is it? If you do it British, then you're fine. Dude, any girl that pays attention to that podcast will be single
Starting point is 00:41:02 at 40, 100%. Well, they pivoted. They pivoted. Early days. It's crazy%. Well, they pivoted. They pivoted. Early days. It's crazy? Nah, they pivoted. Just go gobble up all the dicks in the city
Starting point is 00:41:09 and you don't think, dude, we're putting the numbers on your forehead. You don't realize what's happening. The numbers are going on the forehead. You're not going to be
Starting point is 00:41:16 able to hide it anymore. Like a tattoo? It's not a tattoo, obviously, because it has to change. But it will be a visor that they wear and they will have
Starting point is 00:41:23 like a number that will go across it. Why do you have to have a number on your forehead? Because I'm a bitch. That's why this fucking guy. I don't get it. You don't get it, dude.
Starting point is 00:41:33 Okay, can we be serious? There's a lot of stuff happening in the world right now. All right, ask me something. Why are Sri Lankans swimming in the pool? I thought they was drinking it. Did you see them?
Starting point is 00:41:42 Didn't they look... For real. Why are Sri Lankans going for a dip? Can someone explain that? They stormed the presidential building, them? Didn't they look like that? For real. Why is Sri Lanka going for a dip? Can someone explain that? They stormed the presidential building, right? Yeah, they stormed the capital. Hey, fight that good fight, Sri Lanka. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:52 I fucks with Sri Lankans. Yeah, me too. But yeah, this is the scene right now. They're inside the Sri Lankan president's house. They're swimming in the pool. They're in his bed. Hanging out. Good for them.
Starting point is 00:42:03 And fuck the president. Oh, gosh. You understand what's happening over there? Because I have no idea. I read a little bit. Let's see how much I actually remember. Well, you don't remember? Just fill in the gaps. Yeah, you're right.
Starting point is 00:42:14 Government's been corrupt for a while. The prime minister that they also ousted, he only stepped in like six months ago. But there's been a lot of corruption, a lot of mismanagement of money for like a long time. And people just had enough. And they said, we're storming this motherfucker's house. We're swimming in his pool. We're hanging out on his bed. Good for them.
Starting point is 00:42:28 You gotta do something. That was a cool protest. A protest that ends in a pool party? That's awesome. Yeah. All in good fun. And they got the guy to resign. But you January 6th motherfuckers couldn't get done.
Starting point is 00:42:39 Facts, though. Yeah, how does Sri Lanka's body all the January 6th people? That's crazy. They won, bruh. They were just hanging out. They weren't stealing nothing. They weren't hurting nobody. It's just, hey, let me take a little dip in a pool.
Starting point is 00:42:48 And if a country's broke and they're living like this, people are going to get fed up at some point. They apparently have like a couple million in their national reserve. And they got, what, 22 million people? That's not enough. You need billions. Could we buy Sri Lanka, you think? If we were to pool all of our money together? You made this real white, dog.
Starting point is 00:43:04 You can't just go buying humans. We could bail them out. So we can give them a loan. Okay. And then we would then become de facto presidents of Sri Lanka. Oh, like do one of the economic hitman things. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly that.
Starting point is 00:43:16 I think we could save the country. I'm down to save the country. I don't think there's anything wrong with that at all. Great. I think this is good. I think that we should do it. Mm-hmm. That's it. Yeah. They need $6 billion, apparently, just to
Starting point is 00:43:32 get through the next six months. Got that. Got the money for that? I'm good on that. Not a real charity, though. Don't send me no bullshit. No. I think there's other things that we gotta save before it's round. Why doesn't India come through and help them out? India has actually come through. They're our neighbors. Yeah, and they actually have helped. But they said, like, we can't just rely on India. They need the IMF to actually step up.
Starting point is 00:43:47 And the IMF is like, y'all been so corrupt. We need to actually make sure you're going to use this money correctly if we give it to you. Or at least one economist who I think worked for the IMF or something. Again, gaps. But that's what I understand. My understanding was, like, China basically gave them a bunch of, like, loans that they built they built like docks or whatever with. Yeah, the Belt and Road Initiative. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:06 And they basically defaulted on the loans. And I don't know, maybe that had to do with COVID or maybe it had to do with like. Apparently COVID hurt tourism a lot, which is a big source of income. So then that also was another thing. Yeah. So now they come in to collect that bread. But I don't know, man.
Starting point is 00:44:24 They just got to invest in crypto. I don't know why man. They just gotta invest in crypto. I don't know why they didn't do that. Are you still in? Are you still, like, buying in? Yeah. Really?
Starting point is 00:44:30 Yeah. I'm waiting for it to go lower because I bought in already. What's funny? My mom says I'm never wrong.
Starting point is 00:44:40 What's funny? I mean, you're not wrong. You're not wrong. It is going lower. Yeah. As it goes lower, every time it goes lower,
Starting point is 00:44:46 I put more in. To a new low. And what happens when it hits zero? Then I'm fucked. So you want it to go low until zero. Hit a dollar.
Starting point is 00:44:55 Yo, hit a dollar, I'm going to go fucking bananas. Yeah, but then you can buy all the... I'm going to be out here like one of them fucking Winklevosses. Yeah, you can buy
Starting point is 00:45:03 all the Bitcoin then. Yeah. If it hits zero, it's done, right? Some coin hit zero and then came back. So I guess theoretically, no, but we'd all probably kill ourselves if it hit zero. So what are you going to do? I mean, zero is crazy. Zero means there's not a single person on the planet that wants it.
Starting point is 00:45:20 Yeah. Yeah. And there's no place you can storm. There's no place to go you know i mean like there's not like there's not a president's house there's not a guy that my wife's gonna storm a couple divorce attorneys offices i'll tell you that has she been giving you any shit seeing like the value go down no i've actually said we should keep buying and she's like all right that's crazy we just can't only do that we got to diversify which is completely
Starting point is 00:45:43 rational yeah that's smart yeah that's smart yeah okay how can't only do that. We got to diversify, which is completely rational. Yeah, that's smart. That's smart. Yeah. When she found out how much, she was like, what? And I was like, yeah, what are you going to do? Wait, what?
Starting point is 00:45:53 When she found out how much money I had in crypto, she was like, what? And I was like, yeah, hey, we out here. Let's see what happens. Yeah. The trick is you just got to lie.
Starting point is 00:46:01 Just be like, I invested a thousand bucks a few years ago and look what we got now. She's like, what? That's amazing. That's it. So it's just a much better relative perspective.
Starting point is 00:46:09 It's been a much better way to do it. All right. What else we got? Okay. We want to talk DM etiquette. Doja Cat DMs this kid, Will, from Stranger Things saying, yo, set me up with your boy, the punk kid from Stranger Things. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:22 He posts it on the internet and posts the whole screenshot. He's like, wow, this is so funny. Doja Cat is trying to smash dude. Yeah. She gets pissed off and is like, yo, this kid's a snake.
Starting point is 00:46:33 Leaked my DMs. Because she got a man probably. Oh. So she was doing foul shit. That's what I assume. Oh, I thought it's because she caught a lot of heat that she's dating white boys. That's, on black Twitter, that's what I assume. Oh, I thought it's because she caught a lot of heat that she's dating white boys.
Starting point is 00:46:47 That's, I'm black. I'm black. Twitter, that's what I saw. That could be it. Yeah. Oh. Either way, this is embarrassing. Why are you friends with a 17-year-old?
Starting point is 00:46:58 That's the embarrassing thing to me. Going through a 17-year-old to get the older dude. Why? I mean, yeah, just DM. Also, like, call your agent. Your agent is going to be able to connect you to him. Yeah. Like, you wanted to get the older dude why I mean yeah just DM also like call your agent your agent is gonna be able to connect you to him like you wanted to DM
Starting point is 00:47:08 the Stranger Things kid you wanted to talk to the Stranger Things kid like you're watching a show there's nothing wrong with that that's fine but why didn't she just DM herself
Starting point is 00:47:17 why should she be a mad pussy did she say that dude doesn't have Instagram or something like that I think that's his thing but then he did she just couldn't find it she goes can you tell Joseph to hit me up no way does he have a girlfriend lol slide in his DM sign Instagram or something like that? But then he did. She just couldn't find it. She goes,
Starting point is 00:47:25 can you tell Joseph to hit me up? No way. Does he have a girlfriend? LOL. Slide in his DMs. Son. I don't know his IG or Twitter.
Starting point is 00:47:31 He doesn't have a DM to slide in. Why are you having a conversation with a guy who calls you ma'am? You know what I mean? Like, this is a 17-year-old kid. Hold on. He said ma'am?
Starting point is 00:47:40 Yeah, right here, ma'am. Get out of here, bro. And she mad at him? This is embarrassing for you. It might be the ma'am, yo. Yeah. If he kept the ma'am in Get out of here, bro. And she mad at him? This is embarrassing for you. It might be the ma'am, yo. He kept the ma'am in the post? That's crazy.
Starting point is 00:47:50 Yeah. But also, it's corny of him. Why'd you leak that? He's 17. He don't know no better. You should never leak DMs. Never leak private shit. I don't care if it's nudes or a private conversation.
Starting point is 00:48:00 You don't know what somebody's more embarrassing about. We put all this value on nudes, but some people might be way more comfortable with their nudes being out there than a private conversation. Sure. So, yeah, he should go to jail. He should be shot in his fucking head. Whatever happens to Mia Khalifa should happen to him, 100%. He's 17.
Starting point is 00:48:17 It's different rules. He's a minor. Put him in juvie. Okay. Social media juvie. Have him out there fighting, slipping on semen. Yeah, slipping on semen. You know what I mean? Have him out there fighting, slipping on semen. Yeah, slipping on semen. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:48:25 Have them out there fighting, slipping on semen, bro. Okay, alright. Like, that's some real shit. You don't know what Rikers is like. Yeah. Yeah, you never run time, Akash. You do some time. You out there, dude wants to fight you. You in the showers, semen everywhere, slipping on it.
Starting point is 00:48:42 That's something you never experience. That's what they don't tell you You fall on semen Now you're sitting in semen Now you're sitting in semen Semen seeping up your butt cheeks And butthole Yeah
Starting point is 00:48:50 Now you're pregnant Now your kid's gay Think about that That's how it happens You never done time bro Yes bro If you did time You would know
Starting point is 00:49:02 Okay Yes What'd you do? Say again What'd you do what'd you do what'd you do i snuffed somebody that got you in rikers no when i was in rikers oh okay i snuffed somebody yeah slipped licked the floor clean yo it is what it is bro i said to myself i was like i ain't slipping on no semen for this guy wanted to fight with me. He's like, yo, we might slip on semen. I'm like,
Starting point is 00:49:27 I ain't slipping on no semen. Slurped it up. Yup. Had all the grip. Had all the grip. Did you win the fight, at least? Say what? Did you win the fight? I was cramping because I was so full. You can't exercise after you eat so quickly, bro.
Starting point is 00:49:43 You can't exercise. You eat that much calories, you can't exercise After you eat so quickly Bro You eat that much calories You can't exercise right there Yeah You know what I mean I probably ate about A good two billion kids Jeez I was eating two billion
Starting point is 00:49:54 And those are tough kids too Those are criminals kids Yeah I did Facts bro Motherfuckers was going crazy Gang fights in my tummy You know what I mean Different sets bro
Starting point is 00:50:03 They was throwing up Different sets bro That's crazy did you get impregnated say again did you get impregnated I told you I got pregnant I got scooped bro
Starting point is 00:50:11 I got an abortion I got an abortion bro really yeah I got an abortion dude and that's why I'm so pro females choice and man's choice
Starting point is 00:50:21 say what and male's choice to get an abortion pro pregnant person's choice I was pro pregnant person's choice yeah abortion? And male's choice To get into a smorgasbord Pro-pregnant person's choice I was pro-pregnant person's choice Yeah Yo abortion is nothing To joke around about
Starting point is 00:50:29 Al Yeah serious Al For real dude Yeah I gave myself it How you do that? Say again? How you do that?
Starting point is 00:50:36 How did I give myself an abortion? Yeah And there's only one way You can do it Yeah Yeah What is it? Wire hanger?
Starting point is 00:50:41 No dude That's gross That's crazy dude Obviously not It's disgusting No I was playing basketball And I just hit a shot And my boy jumped And I jumped to do that yeah what is it wire hanger no dude that's gross crazy dude obviously disgusting no when i was playing basketball and i just hit a shot my boy jumped and i jumped to do that like uh yeah yeah like high five thing yeah oh wow that seems pretty easy to be honest with you it's very easy but has anyone ever done that you've never lost a child has anyone ever done that in sports in real life
Starting point is 00:50:58 say what like the chest bump in sports like i've never seen that happen in real life ever like you're playing basketball with your boy and you make a shot and you like chest bump in sports? I've never seen that happen in real life ever. Like you're playing basketball with your boy and you make a shot. And you chest bump in the air? Mark, you watch soccer, bro. You don't watch real sports. That's my point. If you watch a real sport, you would see that coming off. Has it ever happened in basketball ever?
Starting point is 00:51:14 Yes, bro. All the time. A chest bump where your nose is touched? No. That shit is sus as hell. Why your nose got a touch? That's the weirdest celebration in sports. Because that's the only way you can make it less weird.
Starting point is 00:51:23 That's the weirdest celebration in sports. You go and you put your titties on some other dude and you jump in the air. I don't celebration in sports. Because that's the only way you can make it less weird. That's the weirdest celebration in sports. You go and you put your titties on some other dude and you jump in the air. I don't believe in it. And I've also never seen it. It never happens in football. It never happens in basketball. It doesn't happen in soccer. No, it doesn't happen in soccer.
Starting point is 00:51:35 That's not how they celebrate. They slide on their knees like men. You want to see me? The ground's full of semen, bro. Is that what they do? They're like about to suck dick. They're so excited. They run.
Starting point is 00:51:44 They slide on their knees and they just hope that there's a dick. They'll slide on their belly sometimes. Just pull an Andrew Schultz in a Rikers prison semen, bro. Is that what they... They're like about to suck dick. They're so excited. They run, they slide on their knees, and they just hope that there's a dick right there. They'll slide on their belly sometimes, just pulling Andrew Schultz into Rikers prison. Yeah, exactly. I was never on my belly, bro. How do you lick? Say what?
Starting point is 00:51:52 Hands on your knees? I did handstand, and then I went down, dude. Okay, I have a hypothetical for you, all right? Okay, give me your hypothetical. You're pregnant. Okay. You're driving in Texas. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:03 You get pulled over in the hov lane i love this one this is yo yo this is amazing says hey you're supposed to have other people in the hov lane why are you driving with just one person she goes i'm pregnant i'm pregnant from now on in the hov lane and you can't say shit because you don't know what gender i am oh shit i think in those states they know what gender you are. You know what I mean? That's the point, but I'm saying in the states in the states that want to make abortion illegal,
Starting point is 00:52:31 you should be able to drive with a baby in your belly in the age of 100%. You decide when life starts. There's more than one life in there. Change the fucking rule if you don't like it, bro. Absolutely. Yes or no? Yo, new tax dependence. Soon as you're pregnant, that's a tax dependent. That's my child. He, bro. Absolutely. Yes or no? Yo, new tax dependents. As soon as you're pregnant, that's a tax dependent.
Starting point is 00:52:46 That's my child. He's alive. Done. What else can you do? When does child support start? Yo. Oh, that's a good question. When does child support start?
Starting point is 00:52:58 When the kid's born, right? That's how it is now. Oh, whoa, whoa. Why on the earth would it start when the kid is born? Yeah. Life begins.
Starting point is 00:53:05 That was a good point. At contraception. That's not what I'm saying. Good point. What if you want to get a discount at a movie? What about that? Or like at Denny's or something. You want to get the kid's menu.
Starting point is 00:53:17 You should be allowed to do that if you're pregnant. Yes! If the kid is eating that food, is it not? Mm-hmm. Kid's going to see the movie and around about where, or at least hear it. O-M-G. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:28 They should have to pay for two. Yeah. If you're pregnant, you should have to pay for you and the kid that's in that movie. Required. Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 00:53:36 Mm-hmm. If you're going to see the Minions movie, double it up. Actually, you don't have to if they sit in your lap and technically the baby is in the belly,
Starting point is 00:53:43 so it's on your lap, you don't have to do it. And there's usually an age in which they're free. Like usually under three. Kids under three eat free. Oh, yeah. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:53:48 So you're going to be all right. What about airplane? What about it? Pregnant ladies on the airplane. No, because if they can sit on your lap, it's just one seat. Yeah. Most of the rules are figured out. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:57 It's just this other one right now. Should they charge fat people for two seats on an airplane? Yes. I think they should charge fat people for more than that. I'm listening. Why would it be more than two seats? There's? Yes. I think they should charge fat people for more than that. I'm listening. Why would it be more than two seats? There's like a,
Starting point is 00:54:08 there's a view thing. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Sometimes a smell thing. Yeah, I've experienced. Oh, wow. But does it go to the person that they're sitting next to?
Starting point is 00:54:17 Like a voucher or something? Yo. If you're willing to sit next to that person, you get a voucher. Like a Wolfgang Puck Express or something? Like they hook it up?
Starting point is 00:54:25 Nah, because she'll steal that shit this thing, bitch. You need free tickets. I thought it was a dude. You made it a woman. I respect that. Bitch is genderless, you know what I mean? Yeah, that's fair. It's a genderless bitch.
Starting point is 00:54:35 Yeah, it's a genderless bitch. It's a gender-fluid bitch. Yeah. But you guys should get a free flight. I had to put up with this for three hours. Now you should get a first-class upgrade on the next flight. That's very reasonable. Yeah, I think that's fair.
Starting point is 00:54:45 By the way, did you see the Minions movie? No, I did not. Why not? You didn't dress up in a tuxedo? No. You don't believe in it? No. Do you think it's the greatest movie role out of all time?
Starting point is 00:54:53 Yeah. Never been done before ever in history? Yeah. It's never happened in the history of the internet. It's on blue. They're geniuses. The way they did it, they're absolute geniuses. The Minions or?
Starting point is 00:55:03 Also the Minions. No. Just this idea, like you understand that all these kids watched the movie when they were children. Now they are, what are they, Gen Zs they're called? Mm-hmm. Now they're, these Gen Zs are, you know, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20s, early 20s. How do you get those same people that really enjoyed Minions, and Minions had a profound effect on their childhood, to tap into the movie again? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:26 You don't have to teach them about the product again. And they definitely don't want to watch a child movie, like a movie only for kids. So, like, tapping into Yeet and creating this, like, marketing plan, like, with the memes and other stuff, it was just genius. It's like you basically get them to feel the nostalgia while also feeling the relevance. And a really cool thing has happened. Hip and nostalgic. Pardon? Hip and nostalgic.
Starting point is 00:55:49 Hip and nostalgic. Now you crossed that. And a cool thing is happening. It's like with some of these marketing, like Minions figured this out. There's something I've realized when social media came around. It's not just quality of content,
Starting point is 00:56:00 but because younger generations get social currency by sharing things, the thing that they share has to then make them cool as well. Like everything is content to these kids. So for example, going to Minions and just saying, hey, I went to the Minion movie, isn't as cool as dressing up in an all black suit and going to it, bringing it. Yes. Bringing bananas there and eating it. Right. So it's like, I think what the people that did the marketing for this movie realize is the kids need to feel in on the joke. They're not just sharing like a nice piece of standup because they're like, this is really funny.
Starting point is 00:56:36 Yeah. They have to almost like something ironically. I think that's where a lot of things grow. It's like, it starts as irony. We're actually kind of making fun of this thing We don't really like it And then all of a sudden I like it
Starting point is 00:56:49 Here's this white rapper kid that wears a turban It's kind of ironic to like him And then all of a sudden, oh shit, the music is kind of fire And then it's become a movement And now you're down to be part of the movement Because you started it Weirdly, the kids need to be making fun of the thing that they like.
Starting point is 00:57:06 Yeah. It's a weird time to be a content creator too. But is it risky for the movie franchise? Because now you turn this movie into like a joke and so it becomes like Sharknado or some shit like that. That's interesting. But I don't think if it's,
Starting point is 00:57:19 especially because they already have hits in the can. So now you're coming out with another one. New kids probably are going to look at that like, like a five-year-old is going to be like, oh, that's not for us. Possibly. That's, you know, whatever. Or they'll just like it regardless.
Starting point is 00:57:31 I think that a five-year-old being like, yeah, it's not for me. It's not hip enough. It's not hip enough. Five-year-olds are the most hip. It's an interesting time to be a content creator because you got to get five-year-olds who are very hip and with it.
Starting point is 00:57:46 I just feel like it depends at this point on the movie. So if the movie itself is good, all those kids that went there ironically will be like, actually, it was kind of fire. You got them in the door. Now it's up to you to deliver. If you don't deliver, that's a one-time lick, and you're right.
Starting point is 00:58:02 It's one and done. Try to recreate it. People are like, I don't need to come back. But if you get them in the door and they actually enjoyed the experience and liked the characters and thought the story was really cool, and you'll be able to look at, not watch time, but you'll be able to look at the word of mouth and how many tickets are sold, et cetera, and see if people actually like it and be like, okay, we got something. Let's keep running it up. And you know what makes a lot more sense than the argument I made earlier?
Starting point is 00:58:23 Kids don't care. They're going to like it regardless. You just got to get the 15-year-olds in. When you say kids, you mean children. Yeah, three, four, five. They don't care. They don't know what's... But now I think movie franchises or movie production houses are going to keep doing this type of thing.
Starting point is 00:58:37 Oh, and then it will just become... And now it's going to be like cheesy. Well, also the people getting the jobs for the marketing grew up with the internet. Whereas before, because those kids are 25 now, 26, 27. Before, we didn't really grow up in the internet so we're just kind of guessing yeah now these kids are like nah this is how you do it i grew up with this yeah we were talking about just the special and i was and i was asking uh the guys i was asking shubh and i was asking shifty and i was just like what what what are the things within your generation that have become popular off of like merit off of like the actual quality.
Starting point is 00:59:07 Like obviously sports, you're popular if you score a lot of points because there's a metric that shows how good you are, right? But like, what are the pieces of content that are just purely, oh, this is brilliant. I have to give it up for this thing. And it was very hard for them to come up with ideas. And I suggested euphoria and they're like, ah, yeah, Euphoria. Like, people, it's just kind of ubiquitous. Like, this is a great show, and we like this show. But most of the things that they were saying were popular were kind of like jokes on top of jokes that had to do with memes. Right.
Starting point is 00:59:38 Right? So it was like a constant sarcasm or like a meta approach to comedy. constant sarcasm or like a meta approach to comedy. And it's very interesting because when creating content, do you want to create the thing that's made fun of so that people spread it? But like, how do you tell which one came first? I feel like one perpetuates the other. Yeah. So I guess that's the question I was just posing was, are you playing into how kids share things and then creating the thing that is made fun of and then it's shared or are you organically trying to make something good and they're like this is ridiculous and then they share it yeah i mean i guess both happens all the time i think they both do happen the thing is how do you gain that system you know i think when we were coming up it's and i could be completely
Starting point is 01:00:18 fucking wrong could be the exact same thing but it feels a little bit more like, hey, if you make the really good thing, then people will see it. Yeah, or just cool wasn't, it's cool because we're all kind of laughing at it, then it becomes cool because we're all kind of doing it. It was just cool. But we did have ironic things that happened before, and there's one that I'll point out. I wonder if it was impactful for you guys. There was a time where MTV did a VJ competition. Yeah, I remember that. There was
Starting point is 01:00:47 the guy that they wanted who ended up working with MTV. Yeah. I don't know for a fact that they wanted, I assume his name is Dave and he ended up working for the company being a VJ and then went on and- It was good, smooth. There was another guy who was a crackhead named Jesse and he was literally like a heroin addict with a wild voice, wild hair. I think he was even fucking homeless, like some kind of like East Village kid, like whatever. And Jesse was so,
Starting point is 01:01:14 he could barely read the teleprompter. The other guy was like, remember he was like polished and he had the whole thing down. Repeat the line. The guy, but people, we thought, we're like, wouldn't it be funny if the guy that should never win, they're leaving it up to us. Wouldn't it be funny if the guy should never win?
Starting point is 01:01:29 And we had this Minions-esque moment where we were like, let's create satire here. Let's be ironic. We're going to ironically like the guy who's not good at his job. He is kind of authentically unique in himself, but he's not. And that movement, there was no internet. Think about that. We're like making phone calls to make this happen. Imagine that with internet. There's memes about him. You have
Starting point is 01:01:52 the polished guy who should get the job and the guy who should never be paid to talk in front of the camera. And the never be paid to talk in front of the camera guy wins. I remember him winning. I don't remember anything about him, but I also don't remember everybody being like, oh, this guy, let's just laugh at him. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:02:05 But the difference between this and a Minions is you didn't eventually be like, you know what, Jesse's great, dude. He's so good. I love this guy. I don't know that that happened. You could tell me. Oh, no, I don't think,
Starting point is 01:02:14 I don't think he ended up having like a big career after it. But, and then that was the kind of fucked up thing. It was like immediately after, it was just like, okay, we're done with that cool adventure. It's like Free Britney. It's like Free Britney was like kind of ironic. There are some people who actually cared, but most people didn't really even look into her psychology. It's like, oh, this is a cool thing to be a part of.
Starting point is 01:02:33 And it's almost like ironic. Yeah, Free Britney, we had fun with it. We made, I wore a fucking Free Britney shirt on some pod. I forget what it was. I forget. Maybe it was, maybe it was on stage. I don't know. But it was like, we're teasing this thing. I just hope that the younger generation still has room to appreciate real quality content. And I asked them, like, what's the musician that people like? And they were like, Drake. And I was like, okay, this is quality music that they can, but they're not sharing it close to as much as they are that this guy that they can like ironically. Drake might have been the gateway into this thing, though, because Drake, we all laughed at the fact that he was corny, but the music was undeniable. No, the corniness creates the room for the ironic support. All the memes where he's like dancing and looking kind of- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:03:20 He's Degrassi. He's wheelchair Jimmy, whatever. Yeah. Yeah. So it's almost like that needs to play a part in it. Yeah. Well, I remember the baseline of it, and I'm not discounting what you're saying. I'm saying I think it's the gateway.
Starting point is 01:03:30 Because in addition, a lot of people were like, you call him corny if you want to, but the music fucking slaps. That was the pushback I would get as somebody who just didn't really like him from the beginning. You can act like the music don't slap. It slaps. Music fucks. So that's where that was there. And then the memes and shit. Like when he was dancing in the fucking, used to call me on my't slap. It slaps. Music fucks. So that's where that was there. And then the memes and shit. Like when he was dancing in the fucking, used to call me on my cell phone, hotline ring.
Starting point is 01:03:49 He was already fucking huge at that point. Yeah. But then it became its own like bang, bang, bang. What is that meme where it's like this? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know.
Starting point is 01:03:58 But I don't know what begets what because like the reason why those memes are working is because we all know it. It's basically just like a digital inside joke. Everyone's like, oh, we've seen this meme. I know this guy. He has a funny face here that he doesn't like something, and he has a face that he likes something. That's the thing. Yeah, you know, there's a line in The Office. My wife loves The Office.
Starting point is 01:04:15 Great show, but she loves it, so it's on a lot. And there's a line where, like, Michael Scott's like the goofy guy that nobody likes, and he goes, I love inside jokes. I'd love to be a part of one someday. that nobody likes and he goes, I love inside jokes. I'd love to be a part of one someday. And it's a funny line, but also that is essentially
Starting point is 01:04:26 what you just said is like, yo, how happy are we when we're all a part of the inside joke? And then we just share it and share it and share it and then eventually
Starting point is 01:04:32 it's going to catch everybody and if it's quality, you'll be like, yo, this is actually dope though. And then you become a fan fan. Yeah. I think Drake realized that early on and he like leaned into it
Starting point is 01:04:42 like for people to meme him yeah he did stuff yeah yeah and at first it used to bother ability i think that's because remember when he first came out people were saying oh it looked like he has down syndrome this kid is like super emo yeah like canadian rapper yeah somehow he just looks like a sharp a sharp sharp yeah well he is some like he leaned into it and now people don't necessarily make a sharp A. Sharp A. Sharp A. Yeah, yeah. Well, yeah. He leaned into it and now people don't necessarily
Starting point is 01:05:08 make fun of his actual character. It's just like, K will just make fun of when he actually wants us to make fun of him. Yeah, so now everybody's in on the joke.
Starting point is 01:05:15 When I do the I'm too sexy song or whatever, it's like, ah, this is easy to mean. Yeah, he has a great sense of humor about himself, it seems.
Starting point is 01:05:22 I didn't know about the beginning, but it seems like he's willing to take a joke, and he makes fun of himself, and he's very loose with it, which is incredibly likable when it's someone that famous. Because most famous people, I don't want to say most, but the famous people that we see that seem incredibly sensitive
Starting point is 01:05:36 to being teased or being positioned in a weird way. When you see somebody that's that famous, that successful, that's laughing at themselves, you're like, oh, wow, are you a real person? Yeah. Now, what were you saying? Yeah, I guess the place where it gets hung up is I feel like if the brand or the person is too self-aware and they are perpetuating overhandedly the memes. You know what I mean? I feel like Drake does a good job of doing it subtly, whereas he'll be like whereas he'll like i'll do a song and then people will just pick it up organically because
Starting point is 01:06:07 that's what people do so like it can come across thirsty if you're like too in on it yeah exactly or if like he's the one that's like hey guys we're doing a new challenge we're doing the my song challenge it's like oh it's not funny because you're telling me the inside joke well real quick on this i'm not teasing you yeah yeah you're too in on it yeah even if you aren't shut the fuck up yeah let them be the ones that do it because then they're gonna get all the credit if you're the one pushing your own dance kiki challenge if shiggy doesn't push it and drink shit for that too yeah oh wait wait like a little bit because it felt forced it was like oh he's really trying to get a TikTok song to blow.
Starting point is 01:06:45 And like we were kind of knocking it at first. That Kiki challenge? Yeah, I think so. I think most people were like. Oh, I thought Shiggy. Yeah, I thought Shiggy started it and it blew up. And then I saw fucking Sierra doing it. I was like, this is wild.
Starting point is 01:06:55 Yeah, but like the fact that he has like the steps to the dance in the song. The Toosie Slide. No, the Toosie Slide. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm thinking of that one. I think he thought Toosie Slide. I mean, this is so crazy. And that one he got pushback for. I think that's his one. I think he thought 2C Slide, and this is so crazy. And that one he got pushback for.
Starting point is 01:07:06 I think that's his point, actually. I think we made fun of him. We're like, you want the TikTok dance. But ironically, the one that blows up is the one where Shiggy, shouts to Shiggy, just does a hilarious video in his fucking sandals outside of his house in Queens, and it becomes like a dance track, right?
Starting point is 01:07:21 And that is the pureness. That is authenticity. And then Drake leaned in and did a video with Shiggy and blah, blah, yeah. And that is the pureness. That is authenticity. And then Drake leaned in and did a video with Shiggy and blah, blah, blah. Like, he let it become a thing, then he was in on it, and then he's more likable.
Starting point is 01:07:32 But that's, I guess, what's so impressive about the Minions movie is that it isn't authentic. Right. It isn't pure, but it is done so well that even the people
Starting point is 01:07:42 that recognize they're being marketed to are allowing themselves to be marketed to and playing into the marketing. And it doesn't hurt the fact that they outlawed it and people are getting arrested for it, because now it looks bad. So was that, because that's how I found out about it,
Starting point is 01:07:58 is the kids wearing the suits to the premiere. Was that a planted thing, or was that just something that happened organically? I don't know how it's done. Who knows? Because I think if that happened organically, that's how I found out about it and that's how I was like, oh, this movie seems fun. Even as a 38-year-old man, I'm like, this seems fun. Might as well see this movie. What is that shit that was by where we lived?
Starting point is 01:08:13 Our old place in East Village where they dress up. Rocky Horror Picture Show. It's fun to be on the inside. It's the inside joke. You're wearing the outfits. You're dressed up. But it's fun to be mischievous. If Minions is posted on their Instagram like, hey guys, we're all dressing up in suits going to the movies. That's why it's not mischievous.
Starting point is 01:08:29 If Minions really want to throw gas on it, hey guys, please do us a favor. Don't wear the suits and move the ears because it's causing a lot of problems. People are very concerned and blah, blah, blah. Yeah. Out of here. But that's how they do it. So like they link with Cole Bennett,
Starting point is 01:08:46 the music video producer. Yes. And they're like, yeah, do a song with Yeet and like we'll give you rights to it, but we're not going to promote it at all. And so you just meme it the way that you're going to do it
Starting point is 01:08:54 to your audience the way they're going to like it. But we, I haven't seen anything from them saying that they acknowledge it. There's no post like on their IG. Have you seen the music video? This is the most interesting part of it.
Starting point is 01:09:04 It's, there's not a single shot in the music video? This is the most interesting part of it. There's not a single shot in the music video that isn't in the movie. It's just re-edited parts of the movie. And I'm sure that was a part of the deal. You can do the lyrical lemonade thing in the braces
Starting point is 01:09:17 when the minion smiles at the very beginning, but you can't add anything else. There's one thing that they added. They added pictures of Yeet as a minion into the Polaroid pictures or whatever. There's one thing that they added. They added pictures of Yeet as a minion into like the Polaroid pictures or whatever. But that's what movie soundtracks It's very subtle.
Starting point is 01:09:29 Music videos used to be they would just have mostly video and then snippets of the movie. Like the fucking Diddy one for Godzilla. It had like
Starting point is 01:09:37 Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it was like kind of in the movie setting but it wasn't. It's mainly Diddy performing and then a little cut to the movie. This is the opposite.
Starting point is 01:09:44 It flips it. Barely any of Yeet, just regular Yeet and the rest is just minions. Yeah, it's just interesting. I'm curious what happens. I'm curious like what type of art
Starting point is 01:09:53 comes out of this generation and like how they develop a balance between like irony and quality. It needs to be quality for you to be in on it. I think that's one of the things that, and I don't know too much about in on it. I think that's one of the things that, and I don't know too much about Yeet, but I think that's one of the things that sets him apart, is that even
Starting point is 01:10:10 though there was irony in finding him, the music had quality where you enjoyed listening to it. It's like this random perfect combination. It's ironic to like the white kid from fucking Seattle that wears a turban. That's kind of like that does rap music.
Starting point is 01:10:26 That's ironic. And then you listen to it, you're like, hold on now. Right? Like, how do you create that? How do you curate that? How do you use that type of marketing as like somebody coming up that I don't know? Yeah, I don't know. I just think it has to be very subtle and like hands off in a way.
Starting point is 01:10:42 Yeah, you can't force them. They have to create it themselves. They have to, and then how do you inspire that without having like, what are they called? Plants or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, you could do plants. Like I wouldn't call like necessarily
Starting point is 01:10:55 Colbent's collab like a plant, but like, you know, like an affiliate marketing thing. But then like they let happen and they recognize people that are talented, that are making stuff, that is moving culture. Yeah. But then they just say, do it the way you want to do it. To me, I'm like, that's the future of marketing.
Starting point is 01:11:08 That if brands want to be smart about it, they just let creators do whatever they want to do with the things that they want them to push. But tapping into the creators that already have a stranglehold on a group or culture. Yeah, but if Cole Bennett's like, hey guys, come out to watch the show. Whack. Do it the way you're going to do it. Bro, that's what I mean. Anytime we know, brands that we're working with, right? It's just like, if you let us do it honestly, it will be way more impactful. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:36 Beyonce gets—I can't even imagine how many millions from Pepsi to do a Super Bowl ad. Then they pay for the ad itself. Then they pay for the airtime. Imagine they just threw Beyonce half of that total money, and're like do whatever you want make it yours a whole different i think it hits harder i think it saves them money i think it makes the creator more money i think in every way would be more effective it's so funny it's like once once brands or corporations figure out how to do this model and i think maybe we touched on this earlier, but the model will only last for a couple years.
Starting point is 01:12:11 Once it becomes obvious that every Pixar movie is tapping into the cool musician and having them make the... Literally, Hollywood is a race to be second. So right now, there is a cartoon coming out, and they're like, we need a song with Future. We need a song with Blah Blah Blah. Yeah, McCarty's gonna do a thing.
Starting point is 01:12:27 Yeah. Literally, Playboy Carty. How do we get Playboy Carty to be in the new Dracula movie? He'll do the thing. And it's like, and then, like you said earlier, we'll notice that we're being marketed to and then we'll reject the marketing. Is a good, subtle example of it
Starting point is 01:12:44 Jack being in White Man Can't Jump, where it's like, hey, you're going to be in this movie. You're probably a good actor. You're probably good at ball. And it's not super, like, you do whatever marketing you want to do. You don't have to try. Just your name being in it is the equivalent of throwing eat a bag to do. So now we can be way, way less. We don't have to be obnoxious at all.
Starting point is 01:13:03 We don't have to be in your face at all. And you're still getting all your fans. It's becoming a part of the like, what's the cultural conversation? Yeah, the zeitgeist. Yeah. Jack Harlow doing Tyler Hero as a song. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 01:13:16 Tyler Hero is a very good basketball player, but is there like a certain irony to like him being like the sort of swaggy white kid? Maybe. And like his jersey sells numbers. Yeah. No, there's something to that. I think there's something to that.
Starting point is 01:13:32 I don't know if that was orchestrated. I imagine with the White Man Can't Jump movie that production was going, we've got the old heads that grew up with this movie. Yeah. It don't matter who we put in it. Yeah. I'm showing up.
Starting point is 01:13:49 It'd be hard for me to not go watch White Man Can't Jump. You put Woody and Wesley in it, I'm in. I mean, forget it. That's... A scene, I'm in.
Starting point is 01:13:55 I'm going nuts. Exactly. But what can we put in to tap into the youth who were the age of the kids that saw White Man Can't Jump
Starting point is 01:14:06 when it first came out. So how do we, like we know we're going to get the young kids from Minions because parents are like, okay, it's a cartoon movie. I don't have to listen to my kid for two hours.
Starting point is 01:14:14 I'll take him. How do we get the teenagers in the 20s? Tap into culture. I feel like reverse engineering it and it's like, we know we got the old heads. How do we get the youth?
Starting point is 01:14:25 Yeah. And I think Jack we get the youth? Yeah. And I think Jack is definitely the play. Yeah. Yeah. You want to have some feelings, no facts? All right, guys,
Starting point is 01:14:30 we're going to take a break for a second because look, we're all adults here. And I know some of us choose to use nicotine to relax, focus, or just unwind after a long day.
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Starting point is 01:16:50 Seems great. I don't know him at all. But, like... I love how he diagnosed himself with, I don't give a fuck about strangers. It's not that you're blind. It's just like, I don't remember you. You're one of the most famous people on the planet.
Starting point is 01:17:08 You remember me, bro. People talk to me, I need to have a medical diagnosis for why I don't know who you are. And think of how many people you meet if you're Brad Pitt. Every fucking person on the street wants to say hi to you. I got to remember your face? People get offended if you don't remember their face. It's like, bro, you're Brad Pitt. You're meeting 10,000 people a day.
Starting point is 01:17:24 Who the fuck is you? And probably important people being like, hey, I're Brad Pitt. You're meeting 10,000 people a day. Who the fuck is you? And probably important people being like, hey, I'm an investor in your company. You remember me? And he's like, fuck. So many faces. So this is, it's brilliant, dude. What's the name of the shit? Asian disease? What is it? Face blindness.
Starting point is 01:17:40 I got that. Only for white people. Only for white people. Only for white people. Okay, what else? Yeah, right? Okay. There is a senator that is running, and she posted a twerking video that got people very upset. Oh, isn't she already an elected official? I believe.
Starting point is 01:18:00 I think she's like a state. State senator. Senator for like Rhode Island or something. I believe so. God bless. You got my vote. Yeah. This is going to encourage people to vote.
Starting point is 01:18:10 You want young people to vote? There you go. I mean, as is mid. Oh, my. If you're comparing it to other senators, okay. But the ass is not crazy. I mean, that's pretty fucking crazy, though. That's just talent, bro.
Starting point is 01:18:21 Yeah. That's just talent. Like, it's a talented skill. How do you think I got all that semen off the floor? Really? Is that how you did it? How the fuck do you think I did that? That's how you stopped slipping on semen?
Starting point is 01:18:31 That's how I stopped slipping on semen. You was twerking at the same time, too? Fine. That's a natural, just a balance. You need to do that. Are you voting for her or no? Say again? Are you voting for her?
Starting point is 01:18:39 I do vote in Rhode Island. Okay. And I will be voting for her. You're going to go to Rhode Island just to vote? I support black women. Oh, wow. And I support black-owned businesses. Okay. And I will be voting for her. You're going to go to Rhode Island just to vote? I support black women. Oh, wow. And I support black-owned businesses. Okay. Respect. Wait, what does
Starting point is 01:18:52 she have to do with a black-owned business? Get all that cake. You got a bakery. Thank you. I have absolutely nothing. Okay, what else we got? Okay. Oh, this Avalanche video
Starting point is 01:19:08 is just fucking insane, first off. Did you see this? This shit was insane. So this is a dude. But why does it stop? I need to see what happens next if you end up living. So I actually don't know where this is. I mean, how do you think he posted the video, Doug? They could have found a camera, homie, on the body.
Starting point is 01:19:23 No, so they all lived. It's under snow. it's probably water damaged. Everybody lived. Snow. Hey, water, snow. What? This is a fun little hang-up. What?
Starting point is 01:19:34 I'm actually curious to see where this goes. Hold on. Finish the thought real quick. It's not water damage. It's snow. It's snow. Okay. I'm neutral still, but I could be swayed.
Starting point is 01:19:42 What happens to snow as it melts? Why would it melt? You don't think snow just naturally melts? But why would it melt in this environment? You're looking at a glacier. You talking about the rest of the ground that's not covered in snow? Well, it's about to be. And you don't think it's above 33 degrees in the ground?
Starting point is 01:19:57 You think the snow is just going to stay frozen? I don't think enough will melt to ruin the camera, no. That's why we have the footage, dumbass. No, we have the footage because he lived, you fucking retard. How'd he live? I'd just like to know that. He tucked behind the rocks. This is in Kyrgyzstan. And then it gets completely covered by snow.
Starting point is 01:20:12 Let's just watch it, okay? Watch. He's so stupid. He swam to the top after it all melted and he survived. That's what happened. No, that is true. So he's kind of filming. He's like, damn, this avalanche is kind of crazy. It's getting pretty close.
Starting point is 01:20:27 Everyone else is in the shelter at this point. My man is backing up. He's zooming out. He keeps on moving. This avalanche keeps on coming close. He's like, yo, this shit's going to go viral. Wait a minute.
Starting point is 01:20:43 Wait a minute. it's coming right Hold on About Yeah, at this point are you not a little bit Running? Oh Okay Oh
Starting point is 01:20:55 Crazy Now, do you have anything to say? Yeah, he got out Fucking retard Yeah, he got out After it melted Do we know for a fact that he got out yes
Starting point is 01:21:05 yes and he waited for it to melt yes and he swam to the top yes that's what happened Dove what happened he's behind the rocks
Starting point is 01:21:14 he said it was like being in a blizzard and he got out like a rainstorm yeah no is that what he said or is this you paraphrasing
Starting point is 01:21:21 I saw he didn't have to swim up I saw what does that mean I? I saw. He didn't have to swim up. I saw. What does that mean, I saw? I saw. You guys are amazing. I saw. You guys are absolutely amazing.
Starting point is 01:21:32 Is that a theory or a fact? That's a theory. If you're this guy, what do you do? Try to outrun that? Yeah. Bro, I'm going into it. It's like a tsunami. You have to take the boat into it.
Starting point is 01:21:47 Okay. And that stops it. But a tsunami is different because that's... A tsunami is... That's also the worst tsunami advice. I'm pretty sure. Say again? I don't think that is good advice.
Starting point is 01:21:57 If you feel a tsunami is coming, you try to beat the... When it breaks. You got to take your boat. Your boat's about to get fucked up. You got to take it into the wave. Exactly. Into the tidal wave. No, dead ass. That's what they do. Really? Sort of got in my life. I'm not making that up. you gotta take your boat your boat's about to get fucked up you gotta take it into the wave exactly into the tidal wave
Starting point is 01:22:06 no dead ass that's what they do really it's what I got in my life I'm not making that up I'm not trying to be joking around because your boat's gonna get destroyed
Starting point is 01:22:13 if you leave it there and if your whole life is your boat they basically take the boats deep out into the sea because you have some time you know if a tsunami's coming there's like a warning because the earthquake happens
Starting point is 01:22:21 in the middle of the ocean or whatever the tide pulls in crazy oh that's the other thing that's the crazy shit with tsunamis because the earthquake happens in the middle of the ocean or whatever. The tide pulls in crazy. Oh, that's the other thing. That's the crazy shit with tsunamis. When the tide pulls in, the boats are just on the fucking sand. Oh, shit. Isn't that wild?
Starting point is 01:22:33 Yeah, I did not know that. So you're fucked. But then you got some warning even in the city, right? Like, everybody got to evacuate, get the fuck out of here ASAP. That's why I fucked up when you see them motherfuckers on the island resort. Yeah. It's like, did nobody say? Yeah, no heads up ASAP. That's why I fucked up when you see them motherfuckers on the island resort. Yeah. It's like, did nobody say? Yeah, no heads up or nothing.
Starting point is 01:22:48 That's crazy. But anyway, so this one, what were we trying to argue about? How do you get away? If you're this guy, you're filming an avalanche. I probably would have done what he did, bro.
Starting point is 01:22:57 I didn't think there was a chance that shit was going to come that close. Right, it seems so far away. Like, no shot. Yeah. With the tsunami, though, is it bad that I feel like if you know it's coming
Starting point is 01:23:05 you can kind of ride it out Patrice that's a Patrice that's a great video like I saw that tsunami and I was like it looked like I could have lived through that
Starting point is 01:23:13 right a little it seemed like it seemed like you just raised your pants it's a high one it's a high one but if you have a
Starting point is 01:23:21 like a vest or a boat or some shit yeah I think it's more like like cars hitting you and you getting pinned under something. Same with a tornado, I guess. That's what kills you in a tornado. Yeah, you getting thrown into a house. Yeah, you just have a fucking washing machine hit your head or some shit.
Starting point is 01:23:37 Or a washing machine. Yeah, exactly. Like the wind, if it was just wind. That'd be awesome. Kind of fun. Be awesome. You just jump in and out of it yeah have you ever seen a tornado in life yeah actually i have really yeah not one of them big shits but a little guy
Starting point is 01:23:53 a little twister where'd you see him long island okay i don't think that's a tornado i did i saw one in long island bro like a water spout yeah water spout okay yeah where it's over the water and it looks like a tornado? Yeah, because it almost pulls up some water until it's gone to the night. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shit's crazy. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:24:08 Yeah. That's kind of one of my dreams. I want to see one from far. I want to be a storm chaser. Have you seen the movie Twister? No. What? Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:24:15 This Bill Paxton, Helen Hunt? This poor kid. Rest in peace, R.I.P. Oh, Bill Paxton's in it? The fucking hell. Now I'm definitely going to watch it. I know it is. Bill Paxton and Helen Hunt.
Starting point is 01:24:24 Bill Paxton and G, dude. He's in fucking Titanic. They have a whole all-star cast in Twister? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Guess who else is in there? One of the original, like the people
Starting point is 01:24:32 that are excavating Titanic. Philip Seymour Hoffman is in the film. Well, now I have to see it. Is it in theaters? I'm definitely going to go out and watch it now. That was a big budget
Starting point is 01:24:40 Hollywood film. Also, by the way, for the avalanche, there was only a thin layer that ended up covering him. Got you. Anyway, next. Okay.
Starting point is 01:24:49 This guy gets on an airplane, airdrops his penis to multiple people on the airplane, and then allegedly gets arrested. This is the TikTok. Yo, pause. I heard the video he was getting nicked. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's a video of him getting hit. Oh, really? Oh, I video he was getting necked. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 01:25:06 Yeah, it's a video of him getting head. Oh, really? I thought it was just a dick pic. Okay, first of all, a couple things with this. Which is very different. Yeah. He's like, I have to see this talent. Some of y'all's iPhones are just called iPhone.
Starting point is 01:25:19 Like, some of y'all didn't name your iPhones. Mine is just iPhone. It's just iPhone. So you might be thinking you're sending it to your boys because they just got iPhone, and then you're sending it to your boys because they just got iPhone and then you're sending it to other people. On an AirDrop?
Starting point is 01:25:28 Yeah. You can't just text your homie? Nah, it's AirDrop, bro. So you ever send a hand... You know service on a fucking plane to send a video of a dick suck?
Starting point is 01:25:36 I message, yo. Pay for the Wi-Fi. The Wi-Fi ain't strong enough to send a full video, fam. So I streamed full-ass video on my plane a couple days ago. Yeah, but that Indian should have shot on a full video, fam. I streamed full-ass video on my plane a couple days ago. Yeah, but that Indian shit
Starting point is 01:25:45 is shot on a fucking beeper. You could stream anything on that. You watch Bollywood movies. Of course you could do that. We save money when we know how. That's it. But why are you sending a video
Starting point is 01:25:55 where you're getting your whole dick sucked to your friend? Because the boys like to see it. Have you ever done that? Yo, fuck yeah, bro. Have you done this? If you have fuck yeah, bro. Hell yeah. Have you done this? If you have a girl giving crazy talent,
Starting point is 01:26:07 somebody ought to see this. It's got to apply to us because we're one-women people. Imagine if you just had me. No one's ever sent me a dick suck video. I'm going to be honest with you. You want me to send you my dick? I mean, bring it up.
Starting point is 01:26:18 Get it up on the screen. Air drop it. This is actually kind of serious. I've sent one to you on a plane before. No, you have not. And the fact that you serious. I've sent one to you on a plane before. No, you have not. And the fact that you haven't received it makes me very concerned who did. Wait, whose dick were you sucking?
Starting point is 01:26:35 Now it's some guy like, yo, this comedian's slipping on semen over here. Oh, fuck. Oh, that's good. That's good. No, I don't. So here's my question about this. This right here is illegal.
Starting point is 01:26:52 You can go to jail. You get arrested, right? Yeah, I think it's the dick suck instead of the, maybe just the penis. I don't know, but a dick suck, that could be like a revenge porn or whatever the fuck. Oh, you're 100% right about the revenge porn. He can maybe get,
Starting point is 01:27:03 he can get arrested for the revenge porn, but not inconveniencing these people that he's airdropped to. I don't know. And here's why I'm asking. Because on Twitter, people retweet videos of motherfuckers sucking dicks. They were retweeting the Hunter Biden shit. All this shit pops up on your feed. Yeah. Right?
Starting point is 01:27:22 So now you're forcing dick sucks into people's feeds. Yeah. Right? So now, you're forcing dick sucks into people's feeds. Yeah. Right? 100%. Is that that different than forcing dick sucks onto their phone? A forced dick suck
Starting point is 01:27:34 is a forced dick suck. I think you're right. My eyeballs can't take that shit back. I think you're right. Can we see what he got charged with? Because like, what did he do?
Starting point is 01:27:42 Oh my God, son. Dude, just pull him up, son. You gotta go one way or the other. Just don't fight it. I gotta start wearing shorts, bro. I gotta start wearing shorts. You are. You are. That's something I realized when I went to Italy. Something that just will not catch on in America.
Starting point is 01:27:58 I don't care what the fuck it is, it will never catch on. Tight jean shorts. Oh yeah, where they cut off right here? They cut off right above the knee and their skin tight. Italians love that. I don't get it. Son, it's like... I didn't thought that was a real thing until this moment. I swear to God. Ferrari shoes, cut-off jean shorts. Ferrari
Starting point is 01:28:14 shoes also mad weird. Also, with the ankle sock and the front. Like, for real, bro? Get the low cut? This is the most fashionable country on the planet. This is all of them in Europe. They do it. Yeah. It's so mind-boggling because so much fashion is transferable, right? There's so many things
Starting point is 01:28:27 that are kind of like fun, interesting, our shit to them, them to us. It happens all the time. You go there, you see chicks wearing old metal band t-shirts
Starting point is 01:28:34 and shit, it's a vibe. Yeah. There's something about Americans where we will not, we will wear a cut-off jean short. Yeah, I'll wear it.
Starting point is 01:28:43 Some white boys will do the shit where it's all tasseled and everything like that. I'll wear shorts cut-off jean short. Yeah, I'll wear it. Some white boys will do the shit where it's all tasseled and everything like that. I'll wear a jorts, yeah. Florida. Florida. Florida.
Starting point is 01:28:48 We will not do the tight on purpose with the hem. Yep. Yeah. The hem is crazy. The hem. The hem is crazier. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:28:57 Yeah, you got the little strings hanging out tight. All right. It's like, okay. Too tight. That's the worst part about liking soccer. Why?
Starting point is 01:29:03 Is that you like these players and you like these you're like and you see the way they dress and then you see them dressing on the way to the bus
Starting point is 01:29:09 and you're like what are you doing super A yo it's insane because like every NBA player is swagged out no matter what
Starting point is 01:29:15 super swag but then you look at the soccer players and they're just dressed like average Europeans some of these NBA players be dressing like
Starting point is 01:29:20 fucking idiots bro they be doing a lot what do you mean I hate her like the ones that are going for it. The ones that's trying. Like the Russell Westbrooks.
Starting point is 01:29:27 They'd be trading like the Met Gala. Wearing these gooky ass Cocoa Puffs or whatever. Get out of here. Let them have a little fun, bro. I don't know. You got six turnovers, fam. I don't need you thinking
Starting point is 01:29:35 about your outfit. Like if you ball and dress however the fuck you want. Steph Curry can wear whatever the fuck he wants. And he don't even dress that crazy. They should have a dress like a wardrobe budget
Starting point is 01:29:43 depending on your last game. Oh, that's a great move. You can only dress up to like how many points you get. You know how many more wins teams would have if they did that?
Starting point is 01:29:50 I'll pay for all your clothes based on your performance. If you had no stats or like you played trash, you just have to wear like a regular outfit like all white or some shit. Not even all white.
Starting point is 01:30:00 White can be fashionable. That's facts. What do they got to wear? They got to have like a uniform. Yeah, just a regular thing. Sweatsuit. That's it. Sweatsuit got to wear? They got to have a uniform. Yeah, just a regular thing. Sweatsuit. That's it.
Starting point is 01:30:06 Sweatsuit. Keep it simple, bro. Mismatching sweatsuit. Ooh, that's far. Gray sweatpants, black hoodie. Whoa. Yo, you got to show up to the game just in your shorts and jersey. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:30:19 Why does nobody do that? That's a funny move. That's a funny move. That dress up as Klay Thompson? That was great. Oh, that guy was amazing. Bam for life and so worth it. And he's dressed as Klay Thompson full uniform and he's like,
Starting point is 01:30:27 where do I park? And all the parking attendants are like, oh yeah, Klay Thompson right over there. This is the most fire shit. This was playoffs, right? Yes. So he was warming up. He's on the court warming up. Can you think about the fear in the heart of the guy rebounding for him as he missed
Starting point is 01:30:43 like six threes in a row for a playoff game. Like he put all the money on Boston. He's calling all the yo, Clay's off tonight. Motherfucker is winded. We just doing layup drills. And he looks weird too. He looks fat. He looks drunk. Release looks off. I don't know what's up.
Starting point is 01:30:59 He got COVID. He got full COVID. He got it, bro. They just put all the money on Boston. Oh, man. Yeah. Okay. And then, you know what you got to do if you're a rival team of Golden State, the Lakers, whoever, you got to get the guy season tickets for life. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:31:13 So he can still be at the game. Yeah, yeah. 100%. Send him courtside in the uniform. Yes. Just talking shit to Clay. That'd be perfect. Right next to the Warriors bench.
Starting point is 01:31:22 Have him stand up, call for the ball and shit like that. Yeah, sub in randomly. Who cares? Like, just be crazy. Okay, last question. Yes. right next to the Warriors bench have him stand up call for the ball and shit like that sub in randomly who cares like just be crazy okay last question yes are y'all drinking Beyonce's piss
Starting point is 01:31:30 yeah no no no no you just said you already said yes you said yes yeah you already said yes you're locked in are you in a relationship
Starting point is 01:31:36 with her I thought you said my wife I thought you said Beyonce okay my bad if it's to be her girl her man or girl whatever she wants me to be
Starting point is 01:31:45 You simping? Simping for Beyonce? I'll be Beyonce's girl I'll be a kept woman for Beyonce 500 million? I'll do that I'll say yes with no question You say yes with no money?
Starting point is 01:32:02 Assuming we're all single Would we drink a hot cup of Beyonce's piss? This is coming from Kevin Gates, by the way, just for context. Full cup? Oh, shouts to Kevin Gates. That guy's so goddamn entertaining. Jesus. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:32:14 I'd prefer it chilled. Yeah, like a Repo? Like a Reposada? Yeah, on the rocks? I would go, oh, no, if I can have it on the rocks, dude. Yeah, oh, no, it's light. And a splash or like a whole full cup? What are we talking about?
Starting point is 01:32:26 Can you mix it with anything? Is it weird I want to start drinking? Like I literally got a feeling. I was like, we should have a drink. Splash of cranberry juice, maybe some Red Bull. No, you can't mix it with anything. You can't. Yeah, don't mix.
Starting point is 01:32:37 Don't mix. Yo, I heard urine can have like healing things. I said that to my wife when I pissed all over her ass. And she got a jellyfish bite. Think about that. It heals for jellyfishes. Yeah, when I dumped a hot piss on her ass
Starting point is 01:32:50 to save her from a jellyfish, which still has a fucking scar from it. You didn't pee enough. You don't heal soon. That's on you, bro. Is that normal?
Starting point is 01:33:00 Jellyfish stings? Like, they last that long? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Really? I'd just be saying that shit, though. I'm gonna be honest with you. Fuck you, bro. Really? I'd just be saying that shit though. I'm going to be honest with you. Fuck you, bro.
Starting point is 01:33:08 But I think that's on you. Why don't you do more to pee or something? So if I peed more, it would have burned her less? Well, I don't know. Yeah, maybe pee or- I think you just got to keep peeing on her. Some other substances. I don't want to make this, guys. I don't want to make this about my wife and me saving her and how I'm a hero.
Starting point is 01:33:21 I'd rather make this more just about Beyonce's urine. Are we talking about a double shot of Beyonce's piss? Ice, rocks, glass, sip,
Starting point is 01:33:34 casually. With the twisty oranges on it? And a straw. You want garnish. You're not going to go raw. We got to go raw. Yeah, you should make it look nice. Martini glass.
Starting point is 01:33:42 You got to, come on. That'll be some class. Yeah, you fucking up the flavor, bro. You got to get into the flavor of it. It's like a whiskey. I want her dehydrated low-key. You want it aged? I want her dehydrated.
Starting point is 01:33:52 I want that shit coming out like Gatorade, bro. I want that shit orange Gatorade. Shaken, not stirred, right? That's it. And don't, I want her to shake first, then pee. Like, shaken within her body. Oh, that's fire. Yes.
Starting point is 01:34:03 No, that's's now we're having fun now we're having fun yeah yeah do that then you drop a hot piss onto a rock one rock one of the big blocks like yes oh they chipped it inside the bar i don't want it to yeah i don't want to oh yeah like they cut it themselves that morning 100 and i want to hit the rock and be like splattering out cause problems i want the bartender to be cleaning that shit up. Oh, wow. Yeah. You wouldn't do bottled.
Starting point is 01:34:29 You would do a draft. Or I would do like a, like a Poland spring with a sport top. Do you like a sport top? Only if it's Beyonce's piss. That's an exception. Feels more lifelike that way. Yeah. I streamed at your face.
Starting point is 01:34:42 That's why I don't like a sport top. I really don't like a sport top. Cause it reminds you too much of piss. It just feels like you're sucking on this nipple thing. It feels too weird to me. And you also got to squeeze it and squirt it out. I don't believe in a sport top. He had issues when he was a kid.
Starting point is 01:34:54 How cat-like is this guy? That's the same reason I don't like an over-easy egg. Some deep-seated shit right here. An over-easy egg is too cummy to me. Slipping on semen, bro. What is over-easy? You ever eat an over-easy egg? Which one is over-easy egg is too cummy to me. Slipping on semen, bro. What is over-easy? You ever eat an over-easy egg? Which one is over-easy?
Starting point is 01:35:06 That's like when it's super slippery in the middle. Oh, like the pure yolk untouched? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sunny side up? Yeah, exactly, yeah. And it's just, you're slipping on breakfast and shit. You ever do that? I love a loose egg.
Starting point is 01:35:19 Hey, yo. No, you cannot. I'm not done yet. I'm not done yet. I'm not done yet. Be done, though. I pop that shit. Pause, though. I take all the other stuff on the plate, and I'm not done yet. I'm not done yet. I'm not done yet. Be done though. I pop that shit. Pause though.
Starting point is 01:35:25 I take all the other stuff on the plate and I dip it into that. That's wildness. No, that's wildness. That's wildness though. I'll do that. That's fine.
Starting point is 01:35:33 Do that with a burger? Yeah. Oh, I want that shit dripping on my burger. Actually, okay, because egg tastes good with other shit. Like an egg on top
Starting point is 01:35:40 of an avocado toast or whatever. So that's your idea. Egg by itself is wild. That's my point. No, no, no, no. This guy, every day
Starting point is 01:35:48 at the first three years of the podcast used to eat two deviled eggs and what was the fucking thing? Not deviled eggs. Hard-boiled eggs. What is a deviled egg?
Starting point is 01:35:55 I didn't know it was a different stuff. Does anyone know what that is? I don't know what a deviled egg is. It's an egg from a rooster. That's true. I've seen it. You're speaking about semen.
Starting point is 01:36:04 That was a great line-up. But in all seriousness, going back to your issues with liquid. Sport top or over easy? No, the egg. I'm just saying, like, with the egg,
Starting point is 01:36:17 you have an aversion to it because it reminds you of semen. Yes. And I don't know why that's in my head that I know what semen feels like, but every time I eat an egg, I go, this is it.
Starting point is 01:36:25 That's mad gay, bro. What is it? You eat over easy eggs. You eat over easy eggs. That's gayer. Yeah, but you're thinking about semen every time you're eating eggs, bro. Well, now you are also. No, I'm not. Yes, you are. Next time you have an over easy egg, just think of me. Eggs is pure feminine. Yo, my name.
Starting point is 01:36:39 Eggs is the most feminine food. Quickly, I'm going to take the eggs down, bro. Like a single good good. You're like, Papa, that's your spinach. Let's go out. Okay, okay. Here's something. You mentioned that egg tastes great with other things, but not by itself.
Starting point is 01:36:53 Correct. Salt. Yeah. Put it on something. Yes. Unbelievable. Yeah. Incredible. Yes Unbelievable Incredible Makes It extracts all the flavors
Starting point is 01:37:08 Makes the flavors so much better It's the best thing you've ever tried You're like By itself You just described all seasoning It's just All seasoning It's so stupid
Starting point is 01:37:17 All of them Hold on one second White people learn about seasoning White people learn about seasoning Hold on one second I'm not done yet I'm not done yet Lowry's Hold on I'm not done yet. I'm not done yet. Have you heard of Lowry's?
Starting point is 01:37:26 Hold on. I'm not done yet. You take Lowry's? You put it on anything? No, this is actually fascinating. But if you take a spoonful of Lowry's. No one likes Lowry's alone. I was eating saffron just out of the tin.
Starting point is 01:37:35 If my wife made a marinade, puts the chicken in the marinade. Yes. Uh-huh. I tried some of that marinade. Yeah, keep going. It was disgusting. I couldn't eat it. Yes. Uh-huh. I tried some of that marinade. Yeah, keep going. It was disgusting. I couldn't eat it. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:37:49 After letting it sit in the marinade and then cooking the chicken, the chicken had so much flavor. Yeah. It was unbelievable. What? It was unbelievable. Wait, wait.
Starting point is 01:38:01 You drank the marinade after it had the raw chicken in it? No, right before, prior. That's a lie. That's a big-ass lie. You were about to die. He's like, I caught my man lying. You got fucking salamander right now.
Starting point is 01:38:15 You're full of it. Guys, guys, another thing. Okay. Yo, he's going to describe more seasoning. That's all he's doing is, yo, yo, anytime you have spice by itself, no good. Have you been eating it by itself
Starting point is 01:38:27 the whole time? What is that? Have you been doing spice by itself the whole time? This is why British people didn't bring spice
Starting point is 01:38:33 back from India. They went to India? All spice, all seasoning. Okay, butter, right? You take a bite of butter, it is not very good. Yeah, it's super bad.
Starting point is 01:38:41 I've known that butter alone is alright. Were you one of those kids who would just suck on the stick? What? Yeah, that shit is something to suck on. Yo, that is weird. Yeah, it's super bad. I've done that before. Nah, butter alone is alright. Nah, were you one of those kids who would just suck on the stick? What? Yeah, that shit is... Yo, that is weird.
Starting point is 01:38:48 Butter you could eat by itself. Now, butter by itself... Unsalted. Nah. Nah. So, then by itself. One time, someone ate butter in my house and my mom measured all of our teeth
Starting point is 01:38:57 to see who did it. That's a weird story. All of your teeth? Yeah, she took the bite mark out of the butter. She was like, come over here. I gotta see if it was your teeth she took the bite mark out of the bucket she was like come over here I gotta see if it was your teeth
Starting point is 01:39:09 that took the bite or if it was Emily that took the bite that's a true story bro and you got like seven brothers and sisters so it's mad measurements
Starting point is 01:39:19 we did the lineup we did a whole lineup who was it it wasn't me bro you would tell my teeth would take that whole shit out hold on so wait who was it i think it was emily oh my god that is hysterical made you bite another thing how does she measure another stick of butter no no she just kind of
Starting point is 01:39:37 held it up was like yep it fits like when you measure keys but you kind of just like hold them up to each other you know i mean that is crazy. Seems like a very inexact science too. What happened to her? What happened to her for that? She got, they killed her. That's true.
Starting point is 01:39:52 Gunshot to the head, like you said. Son, discipline is important, bro. Yes. Discipline is very important. Okay. Last food thing.
Starting point is 01:40:00 Okay. This is it. I've been hanging out with Blister Peppers, bro. You feel like, I feel like you know a lot about food. I know about food, man. I'm out here in the world. Is this salt? This is why they didn't bring spices from India.
Starting point is 01:40:09 I'm telling you. British people went to India and they were like, yeah, this tikka is not really that good. We don't like it. They're like, well, how are you eating? They're like, spoonfuls. That's what we're doing. Mix it with some water and bring it down. Now, yo, you think salt is crazy. Pepper with shit?
Starting point is 01:40:26 I think pepper with shit? Pepper with shit is berserk, bro. Like, also, like, sometimes my girl will do this fancy shit
Starting point is 01:40:32 where she'll, like, take salt and pepper. Wow. Wow. Yo, you ever fuck with a bay leaf?
Starting point is 01:40:38 Fam. Yo, a bay leaf? Don't get it. He started it with a bay leaf, bro, and just leave it in the sauce.
Starting point is 01:40:46 And there's a crazy thing. You don't even eat it. It's in there? Sometimes you do and that shit tastes horrible. I have. No. I have.
Starting point is 01:40:53 You're not supposed to eat it. I have. You're not supposed to eat it. You've been eating it the whole time? You ate a real one. A real one eats it. I have. I do think Indian shit is like,
Starting point is 01:41:01 you'll not eat it. What do you mean? You eat a bay leaf? Do you ever eat the bay leaf, Shub? We don't know what to eat and not eat. It's in the pot. It's edible. Thank you.
Starting point is 01:41:11 And we've been cooking with bay leaves heller. You don't waste no food, bro. I ate like a fucking, what's that shit called? Nutmeg? Yeah, yeah. I think I ate that once. You're slipping on it? What are you?
Starting point is 01:41:23 No, bro. He ate the Rikers I remember that it was on the floor all over the floor nutmeg yeah nah nah
Starting point is 01:41:30 what about vanilla you fucked with vanilla or what yo here's vanilla's crazy expensive no one talks about that yo but also nobody talks about
Starting point is 01:41:37 vanilla distinctly different flavor from vanilla yeah oh okay this is like a Mandela effect then is it yeah i don't know how that applies but continue one of you just change flavors over time vanilla has
Starting point is 01:41:53 shifted i don't think it's mandela effect though it is it is because as a kid you think oh it's baron stain bears now it's actually baron steam bears you know what i mean the fuck is going on here you know about that effect you don't know what Mandela effect is? No. It's proof that we're living in a different dimension. He's doing too much. There's a multiverse thing. I don't know if you heard this.
Starting point is 01:42:11 We all for a while thought Nelson Mandela was dead. It wasn't a thing. Somehow we all just believed it and he wasn't dead. And then another example is, do you remember that book we read as kids? The Berenstain Bears, we all called it. It's actually the Berenstain Bears. None of us know that. We all just called it Berenstain.
Starting point is 01:42:24 And there's a bunch of things like that. And vanilla used to taste different when you were a kid. And now you taste it and you're like, we all called it. It's actually the Berenstain Bears. None of us know that. We all just called it Berenstain. And there's a bunch of things like that. And vanilla used to taste different when you were a kid, and now you taste it and you're like, that's not vanilla. In all seriousness, are we wrapping this up? Yes. I'll drink Beyonce's pee. You would? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:42:34 I think it would give me healing powers. Here's an honest question. Do you know those purifying straws that they give to people in different countries where they need clean drinking water? Light straws. You have one? Yeah, in my prep kit. God damn it, Dove.
Starting point is 01:42:45 In LA, we had earthquake kits. Earthquakes. Scariest thing that exists on the planet. Earthquakes. Give that to somebody who actually needs it. Yeah, man. Do you think you could drink pure urine out of a life straw and it's just water?
Starting point is 01:42:57 Yeah. That's a great question, actually. Wait a minute. It's just water? Or could you just drink urine out of a straw? Wait. I missed the question. Wait, what were you asking? Were you asking how you have fun on like a weekend or something like that?
Starting point is 01:43:14 Yeah, you get the sport cap, throw some pee in there. You're having a party. No, I'm saying you get a life straw that can now, it purifies all the water. This could solve the water crisis. Real talk. You literally drink out of like a, so they'll give it to someone. What about salt water?
Starting point is 01:43:27 Why it got to be urine? Why don't we just do it with salt water? Because, duh, you could do it with salt water. We're trying to have fun, I thought. My question is,
Starting point is 01:43:33 could you do it, if you, this is what the company CEO should do as proof because I believe in my product so much. I'm going to have my friend pee in this cup, Beyonce maybe, and I'm going to drink it with the Life Strong.
Starting point is 01:43:43 That's a win-win. And it's going to be water. And if it's not water it's even better yeah you could do that as like an actual promotion and I wanna do it
Starting point is 01:43:50 on this show oh that's fucking good we're gonna get a LifeStraw we're all gonna pee in it I'm gonna drink it the answer's no because that LifeStraw removes like
Starting point is 01:44:00 it's an antimicrobial it doesn't remove the salts from pee and all the other shit oh it just removes the microbes the microbes it doesn't remove the salts from pee and all the other shit oh it just removes the microbes the microbes all the stuff
Starting point is 01:44:07 but the salt in pee isn't bad salt is amazing we already discussed this that's the best part we're all salt fans like no one here doesn't like salt
Starting point is 01:44:17 I know it can't change the pH of the water so it's gonna taste like pee so what do they do if they give them to someone in a country where they need water
Starting point is 01:44:24 like what are they what is it good if they give them to someone in a country where they need water? What is it good for? If it's just slightly worse water? How y'all not got water, bro? Think about how much water I have, bro. I turn my faucet on. It's unlimited water. But not even that.
Starting point is 01:44:37 Just dig down. It's underneath, right? Go to the ocean. Figure it out. Not even that. If you go down, eventually you get water right sometimes when do you not
Starting point is 01:44:48 you're on a mountain in the desert you're on a mountain I think in the desert they got that shit bro yeah how do you think cactuses are living now that's not from that
Starting point is 01:44:55 that's from the moisture in the air at night but that's how like if you take salt water and you heat it and then the condensation that goes on like I don't know
Starting point is 01:45:02 it's kind of suck when you try to sit here and shit and then he knows the real reason. I should be cutting the legs out from under you. Why can't I drink pee? Sometimes you need to get the legs cut, bro.
Starting point is 01:45:10 Why can't I drink pee out of a straw? Look, you can. You're going to be judged by society for it. But I don't think that that should stop you from doing something. I'm not going to put it on my iCloud or something crazy. You know what I mean? I'm going to keep it in the tub. That you definitely shouldn't.
Starting point is 01:45:22 All right, guys. Listen. Thank you so much for tuning in Thank you so much For going to get the special Thank you for everybody Who already got it Thank you for the people
Starting point is 01:45:29 That are going to get it I appreciate y'all so much We do We appreciate y'all so much And thank you for listening to the pod We will see you Very soon Peace

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