Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - Hypothetical B!tches

Episode Date: April 23, 2019

This week Andrew, Akaash, and Kaz discuss calling girlfriends bitches, the playoffs are better without Lebron, getting a 'shut the fuck up' ring, nerds have it great, Dame giving Russ that work, Sunday for the folks, and much more. INDULGE!!!

What's up everybody and welcome to another episode of flagrant to no easy buckets analysis by assholes water cooler commentary for your sports needs this episode has been brought to you by manscaped okay it's a huge shout out to the army for taking advantage of the flagrant promotion with manscaped we're great responses. You guys see the value with these guys and their products, man. So the army is undeniably fuerte, undeniably strong, okay? If you haven't purchased anything yet, it's all good. We know you're going to get there. I got a good feeling. And when you're ready, you're going to start at manscaped.com. You save 20% off anything purchased and you get free shipping anytime for you or anyone else as long as you use the offer code flagrant. You go to manscaped.com because there's no reason you should be shaving your body and your balls with the same razor that you're shaving your face. Just think about it. shaving your face. Just think about it. I want you to sit

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doing the extra work over there to bring these brands in. We're very excited about it. Now, I think it's time to start the show. It's time to start the show. It's time to start the show. I'm here with Akash Singh. I'm here with real life Kaz, Kaz, or whatever his fucking name is this week. That's what happens.

When you get a show, you lean into your identity. You know what I mean? When you work with other people, it's like, let me get a show you lean into your identity you know what i mean like when you work with other people it's like let me get a name everyone can pronounce and then once you got your own shit it's like no this is soon you got some clicks it's gonna be a lot easier cause and effect oh god but i just kind of let it rock for too long. Yo, do your thing, bro. Do your thing. Doesn't matter, bro. Do your thing. Shout out to you guys.

It's all about branding, B. Cooking that shit up. I know you're doing a branding well. Shout out to Edit, man. Shout out to Alex. Cause and effect don't sound bad, though. But cause and effect sounds a little bit better. It does.

But cause sounds terrible as a name. But you're elongating the odds. I don't cause. I don't say that. How do you say it? Cause. Cause and effect. Cause, yeah.

I actually like cause and effect. Oh, yeah. I actually like Kaz and effect. Oh, it doesn't have the same to it. Did you just click? I told you this guy's getting more and more African every single week. Bring Stylebender on here once all of a sudden. This guy's dressing all black. Dude, it's going down. I usually wear all black, though.

No, you don't. Yeah, you do. I kind of fucking watch me out of bones even bringing in that gun of gold recently dude this is i love the gold at home i just wore my easter gold today all right fair enough anyway um look a lot of shit a lot of shit to discuss i before we get into uh sports because i mean this is my favorite time of the year. I love NBA playoffs. It's the best time of the year, without a doubt. But we have someone who, for the first time in their life, is watching Game of Thrones, right?

That's Kaz. Kaz. Yes. Kaz doesn't sound right. Kaz, I'm telling you. It's not Kaz. What is it? You're putting the W in there.

It's like an H. Kaz. Kaz. Yeah. Kaz. That's it. Kaz. Kaz. That's not Kaz. What is it? You're putting the W in there. It's like a H. Cause. Cause. Yeah. Cause. That's it. Cause. Cause. Cause.

Cause. Cause. Cause. You said cause. I don't call you a cause. I'd rather call you Kazim, bro. I'm going to call you Kazim. Fuck all this noise.

Kazim in effect. My mama called me Kazim. Kazim. That works. That shit sound like an instrument. You play the kazoo, not play the Kazim. So, okay. So, so, cat.

Cause. I like Dawes. Why Dawes? Dawson's Creek. But you see the vowel rules, right? It's the vowel rules. He be saying his vowel rules. There are vowel rules, right?

Yo, I swear to God, bro. I hate this motherfucker. I swear to God, bro. I hate this motherfucker. You know what I mean? What? It's your fault. It's not even NBC money to change your name.

What? I never changed my name. That's like you've been somewhere, bro. I never changed my name. You come from two educated people. I'm the one who's first generation college. I got to be explaining these stupid grammatical rules like it's something I'm flexing on you. I never changed my name.

Anybody who's known me from before college- I want somebody to email us. ... have called me Kaz. You can ask Chanel. You know Chanel. Chanel's been calling me Kaz forever. I just thought that was her accent. I ain't never heard that bitch call you nothing.

Why's she got to be a bitch for a room? Because that's a woman. That's the term of endearment I have for women as a feminist. I told Akash, I was like, yo, I might kind of like a girl a little bit. He was like, let me see this bitch on Instagram. I said, I just said...

I just said I kind of like her, yo. I just said I kind of like a girl. Guys, I just... But he's getting his bitches out early. He's got to. He's got to get them out early for us to burn. Then he's going to be all, you know, respectable Akash.

Also, listen, I respect women too much to give him all those syllables. That's fake. What do you mean? What do you mean by that? It's like when someone's like, oh, I respect women too much to give them all those syllables. That's fake. You know what I mean? What do you mean by that? It's like everyone, someone's like, oh, he's an African-American. Can we call your girl a bitch? No.

Fuck out of here. She's my wifey. She ain't your wifey. You just met this bitch. The fuck? So we can't call your girl a bitch. As soon as that's your girl, it's a wrap. I'm the most respectful.

You met Chanel Madtime. You met Chanel Madtime. You called her a bitch. Chanel as that's your girl um it's a wrap there's no i'm therant, we would call your girl a bitch. That's flagrant three. That's insane. That's Malice in the Palace. You guys got the history before, though. I'm not calling your girl a bitch. I'm just saying. No, you're not. If we were in palace, this is regular. One game objection. Right now, we kind of keep it in tight.

This is a one game objection. We're like right here with tightness. But if we were like all the way tight. Absolutely. Your girl would absolutely be. Oh, you told me a couple bitches, bro. I see your pull-up. I think it's your bitch. But if we were like all the way tight absolutely your girl We didn't know if it was your girlfriend could be some bitch calling Listen we don't know okay. We could a hypothetical bitch. It could be some bitch and no other bitch is calling me. Listen, we don't know, okay?

It could be your mom calling. It could be someone else. I would never call your mom a bitch. I would never call your mom a bitch. I'm not calling you girl bitch. I'm saying hypothetically some little bitch

could be calling you during this fucking episode. Yeah. I don't care about no bitch. The only bitches off the table for bitches is moms and girls. Right.

Okay. What if, hypothetically speaking, what if, hypothetically speaking, there's a lot of Indian bitches out there, right? Correct. I hear no lies. I'm just saying. There's about a half billion of these bitches. Half a billion Indian bitches. Half a billion Indian bitches running around.

Half a billion Indian bitches, right? There's two exceptions. That's it. There's two exceptions. So there's a little bit of room in the asshole. The asshole is not completely closed. It's not completely closed. If you went up to this on the asshole and you blew into it, it would make that little sound like the hoo.

Yeah, it would make a little hoo. That's when it's really open. If it's really open, yeah, yeah, yeah. If it's a little bit, it's just like a little Snapple bottle. They're like hoo. You know what I mean? Hoo, hoo, hoo, ooh, ooh, ooh. It's going to make no sound when I blow my ass off.

I'm the most respectful to girlfriends. It would sound like a crying ass bitch. Alex, I respect your girl. Is this true? Never. And that's a white girl. I'm nice to Alex's girl, and she's a white femme. I don't even think they're people.

You see her bringing everybody down, son? I bring my own life. I bring my own life. I don't even think they're people anymore. Yo, you see him bringing everybody down, son? Akash is taking all the time. Yo, this is Akash. Akash pulled a grenade and keep his thumb on it like, if I die, then we die. We all go and get out of here. I'll burn the whole house down. Fuck all this.

Fuck me. Yo, yo, yo. Alex, look. He looked right at you and said, oh, you're a bitch. Oh, you're a white girl, bitch. Yeah, what's so funny, Alex? What's so funny?

She is a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch. She's a bitch! Yeah, what's so funny, Alex? What's so funny? She is a bitch, all right? Oh, gosh, pussy! Oh, gosh, pussy, now! What's up? Oh, shit, son!

Hey, hey, hey, hey. Check his laptop. Chill, chill, chill. Chill, chill, chill. The whole fucking ship is sinking. The ship is sinking. All right? Where's the cello?

Where's the violin? The Titanic is going down. Okay? Jesus. All right, I've got it. I've got it. Alex just called his girl a bitch. I've called my own my mama a bitch.

Okay? I'm just saying about my girl. Call your girl a bitch. Not call my girl a bitch. Call your girl a bitch. No, I'll do it in context. I'm not going to do it because you told me to. That's a rule I just made up.

All right, fine. All right, fine. So let's make a context. All right. All right, what if? What if? You have a bad argument and you guys take a break? Oh, she getting all the bitches.

If we break up. During the break? No, no, no. You're just like, yo, let's take a break. She getting them from me. She still ain't getting them from y'all until we broke it. No. No.

If you guys take a break, the is in play if you come into here one day man sad we're talking to you about it i'm like this bitch broke my friend's heart. I'm dancing. This heart-breaking ass bitch. This heart-breaking ass bitch. Hey! Hey! The fuck?

Yo, I thought he was about to knock himself out. I can't knock any of y'all out, so I'm going to knock me out. What y'all going to knock me out Here's the rule Sports podcast right Me and my girl on a break The bitch is at the scorer's table Ready to check in And if we break up

You get that motherfucker on the floor I'm saying if y'all decide to take a break Right If y'all decide to take a break I think First of all I'ma stay with it I'ma say it right there I'ma sit with it Just so we don't take the break So I can first of all, I'm gonna stay with it

Just that we don't take the break so I can hear your caller But if you come in and you tell us you're on a break right and you're going through it like there's a time where you Need a hug for me. You're like broken break is different cuz they might get back together Let me say this if you're on a break, can you fuck other bitches? Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. That's too far. That's too far. That's too far. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. You're already thinking about other bitches.

We talking about main bitches right now. We're still hypothetically talking about main bitches. Hypothetically main bitches. About saying bitch. That's it. All right, let's go. Now I know what Kaz dresses like. He dresses like he's on a death row poster.

Technically, we were on a death row poster. Yo, we were on that poster. You ready for it. Okay, so this is what I'm saying. If you come to me, you guys are on a break, right? Technically we were on the double book Yo we were on the double book You ready for it Okay So This is what I'm saying If you come to me You guys are on a break

Right But you come to me You're like Yo Schultz I need to talk to you for a second You start fucking welling up a little bit I give you man hug You know what I mean

Dap up Yo my man I got you Everything good What's going on Nah shit is so stressful My home is broken Right man

Like she took the dog She took half I can't even see the dog You know what I mean She changed the locks Right I'm feeling this a little bit She changed the fucking locks I'm in this home is broken right i mean like she took the dog she took i can't even see the dog you know i mean she changed the locks right feeling this a little bit she changed the fucking box and then she she she cursed out your best friends oh do you know she she's furious she's not letting nobody talk to you she took your your underwear and disorganized it a lot i'll be folding my shit proper Listen You ain't calling her a bitch

Cause she disorganized the underwear Disorganized underwear You gotta make this a little more extreme She put your exercise shirts With your regular shirts So you don't even know Which one you can get So you don't know

Which one you can get So when you try and go to the gym And work out right And you're fucking distraught And you're hanging out Right Yeah Is it allowed

No I'm not saying Calling her Calling her a bitch I'm not calling her a. I'm not saying calling her a bitch. I'm not calling her a bitch. I'm just saying during that break. During that break. No. When we break up, if we break up, you get it all. Why do you need the energy?

Why do you need the energy? I respect it, but you're not keeping the same energy, bro. I call the rest of these women bitches. You're not keeping the same energy, bro. I respect it. Fine. I respect it. But the energy is so disproportionate right energy, bro. I call the rest of these women bitches. I respect it. Fine. But the energy is so misproportionate right now, bro. Family, girls, energy not the same.

I can say anything I want about my family. You can't. Anybody wants to take a break from my boy, gotta be a bitch. You gotta be a bitch. At least a little bit of a bitch. You gotta be a bitch. So it's like we could bit of a bitch You gotta be You gotta be a bitch So it's like

We could not call it And not for nothing It makes me feel better About our friendship Also Also Real talk If you guys get together

Back again After Let that be a lesson For her bitch ass Not to Not to be a bitch In the first place And then she wouldn't be here

That's all I'm saying Hypothetically speaking We would We would obviously never call. We ain't taking no breaks or whatever. You're right. We dying together. We might kill each other.

We dying together. Hold on one second. That means that's what we do. Tell death do us part. That's marriage value. Did you get married? We finna. Are we about to?

What is we finna? We finna. No. Holy shit, bro. I hope that's how she accepts your proposal. Word up. You said that to her too? Will you marry me?

We finna. We finna get married. We finna get married. Yo, I'm not going to lie. I feel you lie I feel you I feel you I'd be upset at you If I was her

I'd probably be like This bitch This bitch ass dude Right here Not gonna marry me She probably saying that Somewhere Oh gosh

Hey look Yo why don't you Just put the ring on And throw it down That's gonna happen You got to How you gonna do it What are you a weatherman

I'm saving The hurricane's coming I don't want to put Too much out to do it? What are you, a weatherman? I'm saving up. I'm saving up. The hurricane's coming. I don't want to put too much out and then people tell her what's going to happen, but I'm saving up. You're saving up? Oh, really? You're saving up? You're saving up?

Patreon.com slash Flickering2. Make sure you're saving up. Real talk. I respect it. Yeah, we can use more subs. Get some more subs. I told her I'm getting a shut the fuck up size ring. A big enough ring that any time she starts yelling, I can be like, hey.

Yo, all right. So that should be like our new goal. Oh, shit. We get 10,000. Let me tell you something. 10,000. No, no. We already got something.

We need something between that. Between 5,000 and 10,000. Real quick. Akash just had a brilliant idea. Yeah. This was fucking genius. So you said that you're going to get a ring that's shut the fuck up size, meaning it's so big that when she starts nagging, you can look at her and be like, hey, look at that ring.

Shut the fuck up. Right? And I can say, I can be like, hey, bitch. Do you know how fucking genius that shit is? That is genius. Because he knows he's never going to be able to afford that ring. So he just gets to keep on putting it off and off and off and off and off. Girl, you don't even know the size of this ring.

You know how many carats this ring? They have to chop all the legs off the kids who pick it up't even know the size of this ring. You know how many carrots this ring? They had to chop all the legs off the kids who picked it up. It's the size of a ground jack. It's like, I got it. Flakerts is the biggest podcast on earth. You could really afford it. It was like, nah, but you know what? We got a billion subscribers, I got it.

Well, you know what I'm just saying. You know what I'm going to do? Shut the fuck up, Sazer. I'm getting you that diamond the English stole from our people. The Hope Diamond. Was that one? The Hope people. The Hope Diamond. Was that one? The Hope Diamond. The Hope Diamond.

She's going to be hoping. She's going to be doing a lot of hoping. She ain't going to be doing a lot of wearing. There's going to be a lot of hoping. I'll tell the Patreon

what I'm about to do. How about that? You tell the Patreon when you're about to? I'll tell the Patreon what I'm about to do. That should be a subscriber goal.

I'll put it at the back of the episode where I know she ain't going to get to it. You know what I mean? But am I going to be allowed to be there when you propose? Because I know she don't going to get to it. You know what I mean? But am I going to be allowed to be there when you propose? Because I know she don't like me.

I'm about to say, did you ever take the time to game for this? How would I have you know? Why not? What you going to be there for? You didn't see how well behaved I was at your horrible decisions?

Hell no. You ain't coming nowhere near the proposal. Bro, come on. You cannot make Nothing about you You're right Everything got to be about you

The second you get down On one knee I'm just going to yell With a loudspeaker Gay You ain't coming No fucking proposal It's going to be

If I get you at the wedding I better be at the wedding son I better be at the wedding I ain't never been To an Indian wedding Shut the fuck up I'm not going to buy you A ring to shut the fuck up At the wedding, son. I better be at the wedding. I ain't never been to an Indian wedding. Shut the fuck up. I'm not going to say nothing at the wedding. I promise.

I'm not. I'm not at all. I'm not going to say shit. Andrew's speech at the wedding, son. My shit going slap. That's got to be on the fucking Patreon. That shit going slap, son. Andrew's speech at Akasha's wedding

has to be a Patreon exclusive. Oh, I'm making a speech? Huh? Oh, he got a speech. He got a speech. He has to. He has to. His best friend is Jameel.

Jameel ain't letting him speak at the wedding. Your mom will not let that slide. Son, I gotta speak at the wedding. Your mom will not let that slide. Your mom will not let that slide. Son, I got to speak at the wedding. How you not going to let me speak at the wedding? How you not got me speaking at the wedding? I'm a rolling on elephant. I'm going to just be on the top of the elephant,

and I'm going to give my whole speech. How we both going to have elephants? I think they got more than one. We got that kind of budget? We got dual elephant budget? Son, you buying her this big-ass rock, you could get elephant. I'm buying the rock so I can save money on the wedding. The wedding is for her.

He is. Don't do nothing to not save money on the wedding. Her mom pays for the wedding, not you. Yeah, I was about to say, like, don't her parents pay for the wedding? The wifey's family pays for it. Nah, nah, nah. They don't? Not these days.

Really? Yeah, these days you split. Diot? Man, these bitches change, bro. That's what I'm saying. Like, I thought that was the deal. Like, you ball out on the ring. These bitches, not mine. Get the fuck out of here. It's these bitches, not. You ball out on the ring. These bitches not mine.

Get the fuck out of here. Because these bitches not yours. Duh. These bitches is tripping, bro. God damn. Tripping, bro. All I'm trying to say is this. That wedding speech, when I pull up, son, I'm going to pull up on an elephant.

Give a wedding speech right quick. Give a 30-second wedding speech. All right. Auditions. You ready? Cold read. Let's go. Ready, ready.

Dearly beloved. You don't start a wedding speech with dearly beloved. I'm going to watch it in our wedding already Cold read, let's go. Ready, ready? Dearly beloved. You don't start a wedding speaking of dearly beloved. I'm in your one shit in the wedding already. That's all. Okay, okay, okay. The preacher does that shit.

All right, we've all come here to celebrate the union of two gays. Akash, what's your girl's name? Get the fuck out of here. You ain't making no fucking speech. Get out the fucking studio. Who the fuck wanna make a speech? Get the fuck out of here you ain't making no fucking speech get out the fucking studio i don't fucking want to make a speech get the fuck out of here

we've come here to celebrate the union of akash and lakshmi now lakshmi if you didn't laugh i would have thought that's her name she says akash's girl to me. I don't have a pass girl name either, so it's all right. Even, it works.

It works. Okay, okay. And none of your fucking heathens will find out. Let me tell you

how my speeches are going to go, Akash. Right. First of all, I'm going to say, you know how speeches are usually

supposed to go, right? You trash the dude and then you big up the girl. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's how you're supposed to do it. That is how you're supposed to do it. Because we don't give a fuck. Exactly. No, I know. If she give a fuck, I don't give a fuck. they... That's how you're supposed to do it, though. That is how you're supposed to do it. Because we don't give a fuck.

Exactly. No, I know. If she give a fuck, I don't give a fuck. Yo, but Alex, do I do things the conventional way ever? You better make a conventional speech. You ain't making no speech. Yo, let me tell you something. Let me tell you about...

You coming here wilding on my girl, you ain't got to answer me at the wedding. You can have a bunch of Punjabi crazy Indians drag you out there fucking... No, I'm not wildulling on your girl. My speech is just going to be about love. I'm going to tell you about- What you know about love? I'm going to tell you. You writing about comedy?

I'm going to tell you about love. You writing about stand-up? Can I tell you about love? I'm going to say, listen. I seen you in it. I knew. You know what ain't shit? I was so nice to Andrew's girl.

Just obnoxiously nice. Is this the one you just liked or this old girl? No, no, no, no, no. No. You're tight, right? You're tight right now. I'm tight. You're tight.

What? You're tight. You're trying to balance the equation and shit. Yeah. Can I just give you my speech? No. You might like it.

You might like it. All right, all right, all right. I'm not going to like it, but go. I'm going to let you get your joke out. Let me tell you something. Let me get my joke out, right?

Okay. Let me get my joke. You know what I'm saying? Jesus, right? Fucking A Let me just get my joke. You know what I'm saying? Jesus, right? Fucking A, man. So, listen. Give me a full water right here. Throw it to this motherfucker.

A full water right there. This is my run. That's yours. That's yours. You can take mine too. This is how much I know that you're going to love my speech. Okay. Okay.

First of all, I just want to say thank you to both families for having such a beautiful gathering of love akash and mrs akash or miss akash she's mrs now oh it's mrs i thought it's when you honestly don't know that's white rules it's it's when you get married she becomes mrs okay mr and mrs sing it's a beautiful union That you guys have Have created Right A union built on love Built on Stop Alex

I'm just looking at you Built on love Built on Built on Built on hardship Built on unity Built on family Built on culture

Okay You guys have had Amazing times you guys have had tough times but you've managed to pull through you've managed to work on yourselves you've managed to grow you know i mean you've managed to here we go take my best friend in the whole world and move him to new jersey so i don't see him. You managed to take one of the people I care most about in the whole world and make it so I never get to hang out with him during the week unless we have the same

spot at a comedy club. You turned one of my best friends into a text buddy. You know what I mean? So to that I say, good luck. Because you've taken everything from me. Hey, real talk, don't make her happier than me. That's good. That's good.

She would love that. That sounds sweet. She took some happiness from you. I won, motherfucker. I won. What if that's all it is, a submission? You won. There's nothing I can do.

You won. You did it. I lost. The greatest gift you can get by a cautious girl is your unhappiness. By far. I'm going to come to the wedding wearing white. Oh, you're not allowed to wear white? Oh, my bad.

I guess you didn't know. I thought you were allowed to wear white. That's why I'm wearing white. Honestly, I was just laughing. That's the rule. You're not supposed to wear white. In white weddings, it's like only the bride wears white to symbolize virginity, all that kind of stuff.

Purity. Purity. Say what? Virginity is a stretch. You said only in white weddings. Black weddings do that too. Yeah. Black weddings do that too.

Black people get married. I knew it. Wow. I knew it. I knew it. Why are you throwing up on me? Now there's lines. Now there's lines.

Here it comes. Now there's lines. Here it comes. We spent half hour crossing every boundary we could and the laptop's still at home. There it is. That ain't tight, right? You asshole.

Y'all ain't gonna drag me into this. I'm gonna drag the whole fucking ship down. Act like I'm not. I'll catch the iceberg. I got this needle brown, bro. Fuck that shit. Brown, bro. I'm just motherfucking it. Hey, bro. Who's the fucking Denzel movie where he snitched on everybody?

That's me. Nino Brown, bro. No, American Gangster. Oh, American Gangster. American Gangster. American Gangster, yeah. All y'all in trouble. Fuck out of here.

What a great introduction. You know what's funny? She do be letting me say bitch about her because she grew up in Philly. But it's you. But only me. You can't let... Yeah, it's only me. Okay.

When have I ever called my girl bitch sometimes, too? That's my rule. She's being a bitch. Sometimes she'd be cute. I'd be like, bitch, you better stop it. And she gets it. But I don't think white women... Alex, you have a girl that you get it?

I guess I always say it the friendly... The cute way? Alex's girl don't speak English. This guy says whatever he wants around his girl. And she's like, Que lo que? wants around his girl. And she's like, No, she's like, Skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip, Oh man This is so problematic After Jordan Yo we doing it today guys We really are I can't say no

That's the last Nike check I've ever get Son Oh yeah how was your Thing with the kids That was fun as fuck bro That was mad fun I like this Jordan brand shit

That's your side bitch To flagrant to main bitch Yeah bro I don't like it Well listen They're just Well you only see the side bitch Every once in a while

This is home baby What was it It's a high school basketball tournament. Nah, it's their All-American game. So they have the McDonald's All-American. There's three big high school All-American games throughout the years. The McDonald's All-American game, Jordan Brand Classic, and the Nike Hoop Summit, which is like USA versus the world and shit.

Right. And then this was the Jordan Brand one. And it was dope, man. They had some of the best kids around the country. Right. What is it You don't stop fucking other people's shit Who's fucking

I'm gonna fuck I did this I was called play by play Bro like You were called play by play Yeah I was doing play by play commentary You did it for the dudes And the bitches

Yeah for both Yo Them little bitches Can play basketball or what Hey Hey It was nice bro I was like yo The first thing I was thinking about While I was watching, I was like, yo, they will all bust Andrew's ass. Fuck on it, bro.

Fuck on it, bro. I guarantee, there was at least four girls there. I was like, nah, they give Andrew the work. Son. Absolutely. I'm Jon Snow at ease, hoes. I don't know what that means, but that shit was poetic. I can be so mean to that shit with terrible things.

Motherfucking Targaryen out here, dude Torment that motherfucker funny. Yeah, that's you that motherfucker. I am torment Yo black Twitter went crazy. I knew that was going to use that forever. Big white bitches. Wait. Big white bitches. Say no more. That's why this bitch lonely the whole show is not enough black people. Otherwise, she'd be the baddest bitch in the seven kingdoms.

If y'all got no black kingdom, she'd come get a king. That bitch show up in Harlem. She's set. She want to think about Jamie for another day her life make her a little Obama bro real talk isn't it funny

the one dude is ginger they're kinda like white people with color right it's like the one the gender dude are they gingers

I would look at gingers as like the extra white people like they're like they're on the opposite spectrum like they gotta get back to like regular white and then like

just ginger white oh okay okay okay and then albino's is like way past that okay, okay, okay. And then albinos is, like, way past that. Okay. I think. Okay. It's like Dragon Ball Z is, like, the yellow hair. Yeah, exactly.

Wait, what? Like, so the Super Saiyans, right? Like, they have, like, the regular black hair. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then when it goes Super Saiyan, it'd be, like, gold. Y'all let me know when we want to have conversations with dudes who fuck girls. Y'all let me know when we want to get back to that.

All right? Y'all just let me know. It's going to be a minute. Oh, sorry. Sorry. We go. We go. It is.

I felt like I just swept all the bitch talk under the table for the rest of the day. I thought anime was on the table. I thought we could just talk about it. There would be no mention of any bitches.

No, I was just saying in Dragon Ball Z, the stronger you stronger you get, like, as a saying, like, the hair gets longer and changes colors and shit. So that's how I felt, like, about, like, white people. Like, you know, if you're albino, it's just like. So they're the strongest. Ginger's the strongest white people. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You're not wrong. That's what the Vikings and shit look like. Okay. That's a good one. That's a good one. I got to say, there's one thing about Game of Thrones. I don't feel bad at all about, how do I phrase this? Fuck nerds.

This is why I fuck nerds. This is why I fuck nerds because our whole life, they've made us feel like we should pity them and feel bad for them. And every movie is about, oh my Lord, these poor nerds. Life must be so hard. Social outcasts, right? These last two weeks, I've been tingling with excitement about Game of Thrones. And this is how nerds have lived their entire fucking nerdy lives. I've never been this happy in my whole life.

I'm 35 years old and I haven't experienced this happiness. They experience it every fucking week with some other nerd shit. Super Saiyan. That's how I feel about Avengers. So we've been feeling bad for him this whole time. Fuck girls. I haven't thought about pussy once. The one time I thought about pussy was when Arya Stark tried to put that creepy pussy on Gendry. And we were disgusted about it.

Speak for yourself. We said it on West of Rose We were like A girl has no age You know that's what She said to dude Dude was like

How old are you A girl has no age Let me see your needle Anyway Check out West of Rose By the way our cops was on this last set we have fun man I don't want to be recording oh dude it was wild we I was like but cats we got to get you I think when it's done we got to get cat I'm fucking with it I mean what's what was a battle of Winterfell that's next oh yeah

whatever I want me on man man. I'm with it. You talk about best time of the year, NBA playoffs. You can fuck about the draft. That's coming. And Game of Thrones and Avengers all this week. Ugh, dog. Ugh, crazy week. I've been walking around with my dick hard about the Avengers, bro.

Like, all week. All week. Alex just left your ass, bro. I don't care. Y'all are nerding out about Hair color and all that kind of shit It wasn't just I do not care It wasn't just the way you said it It was the way you gazed at nothing

Honestly Cause there's a thing right Cause tomorrow they're having a screening For it like If you're like Invited to a Disney's Having like a screening One in New York

One in Atlanta No So I'm sitting here like Just still thinking I'll tell you why you're not invited Do you wanna go? Hell yeah I'm sitting here like just still thinking. I'll tell you why you're not invited. Do you want to go? Hell yeah, I want to go.

I got you. You're going? I got you. You're dead ass? Yeah, I'll bring you to it. Bro, I love you so much. Yeah. The fuck? I'm Andrew Schultz, bro.

Hell yeah. Did y'all forget who I was? God damn it. I forgot you were fucking famous. Thank you so much. No, fuck you. We were talking about Dallas and shit to watch it out there in Nashville,

wherever the fuck we're going. We're going to Austin. When? This weekend? I would like the two blacks to fight it out. I know. I'll fight your boy. I'll fight your boy. I'll fight you for it I mean

Hey Imagine when he just Took a gun out And shot the other one Like the fucking ass This went from Avengers to Inglourious Basterds

What's that movie Django This got Django real fast I'm not comfortable Looking at Andrew as Leonardo DiCaprio. Oh my god. Just like Django, this is not real.

I do not have tickets. But anyway, that's what I was gazing at. I was waiting for an important text or DM Who is it? Charlemagne has a screening? No. You know Zilla, right? He does have a screening, but Disney's having a screening? Because he does screenings for it. You know Zilla, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He does have a screening, but Disney's having a screening.

So he's trying to organize some shit. Yeah. No, that is a hot ticket. I don't even think they should screen it. Who gives a fuck what the vloggers have to say? Just put it out. That's what I thought. I didn't think they were having screenings, because they didn't have them for Infinity War.

They did. Nah, it was just like, boom, here's the movie. So why do you think they're screening this? I don't know. But it's two days before the movie drops, so was just like, boom, here's the movie. So why do you think they're screening this? I don't know. But it's two days before the movie drops, so it's like, who gives a fuck? Create hype, more hype, probably. But is it possible to have more hype? There's no way to make it more hype.

I'm worried it's not going to live up to the hype because it's so much. Maybe, but why do you think Akash Theri would do this screener? I think it's just probably forced a habit. I don't think they're smart enough to realize this movie is a max of them. But they did it for the last one. Yeah, they didn't do it for Infinity War. Yeah, they just put the bitch out Do you think

And maybe this is Do you think that They feel like Game of Thrones has soaked up some See Didn't think of that Didn't think of that Great point

Great theory I believe it I believe it And you need to put out the commercials With the you know Five stars From yada yada yada And the da da da da da, da, da.

Like, not only is this going to make a shit ton of money because they know, I feel like they need to get, like, the critical buzz, too. Just get the combo going. Yeah, I feel like, because, like, you know,

this year, like, Black Panther won Oscars and shit. And, like, now, like, superhero movies, when they get, like, that Oscar buzz, too. So, like, they're not, I don't think they're concerned

with making money. I think they want people to say, like, oh, this is a great movie, too. They know they're going to make that. They did a manicure. Your nail's mad shiny. I actually did, yeah. Yo. You put on say, oh, this is a great movie, too. Manicure your nails, man. Shiny.

You put on the polish? Yeah, I got the polish, too. I did my toes, too. Oh, all right. You did your toes? Yeah. What the fuck? They look like dragonglass. They actually look really nice. They actually look really nice right now, yo. Yo, take out your fucking toes, man. Yo, they actually look really nice right now.

Dude, bust out a toe. Really nice is relative really nice, I think. Take out that shit. Oh, man. Yo, they actually look really nice right now. Dude, bust out a toe. Really nice is relative. Really nice, I think. Take out that shit. Oh, man. Bro. Yeah, let's look at your foot. Let me see. Let me see. Let me see. That's crazy, dog. It's still disgusting. Dude, is it gold? That shit is a hoof, bro. You got a color on your toes. Nah, just

clear nail polish. So that's just what color your toes are. God damn, man. Bro, that is disgusting. How is it disgusting? I can't look at it. That shit makes me want to throw up, dog. Your foot. That shit makes me want to throw up, dog. That shit makes me want to get up. Dude, his foot is completely flat. I've never seen anything like this. It is zero arch whatsoever. Oh, my God.

I have an arch. Alex, relax, bro. No, he's like zooming in. Dude, hold on. Put your foot down. Put your toes down. Put it down like this? Yeah, like that. So, look at Ed, and this motherfucker tough, dog. You don't know the whores he's seen in mexico you got a cartel for it fam i bet the cartel was gonna chop that shit off they'd be like you know what you keep it just pay us back whenever this is not you know this is an upgrade for me it's good

this is good it's all one shade down here this is is nice. I'm not used to this. Yo, people are going to puke with this. Ow. Bro, no arch. He had a bad soup. Whatsoever, bro. No arch. Where was the arch? Nothing.

Oh, gosh. I'm a big dude, bro. Huh? Big guys don't really have arches like that. So it collapses? No, it doesn't collapse. It's just flat-footed a little bit. You think?

I'm flat-footed. I have a little arch. I was always a two-foot jumper, too, so I never needed the arch like that. The spring. Yeah. All right, fine. Jump with the quads. Now that we're thoroughly disgusted.

Shall we get into some deportitos? Ah, yes. There's a lot. Let's pay a bill before we get into it. Oh, yeah. That's a good idea. Perfect time to transition. Get a little baby bladder?

A little baby bladder or no? I'll force one out. You might as well. Force one out. That's what she said. Perfect time to transition. Get a little baby bladder? A little baby bladder or no? I'll force one out. You might as well. Force one out. That's what she said. What? Oh. Guys, this episode of Flagrant 2, and it's been wildly flagrant,

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Try it for free. Blue Chew, the better, cheaper, faster choice. Let's talk about these playoffs. Let's talk about... So much to talk about. I mean, it is sexy. So much to talk about. I'll say it.

The playoffs are better without LeBron. Yo. Yeah. Playoffs are better without LeBron. And here's the reason why. I understand people are going to go, oh, the ratings are down 23%. Of course, because casual fans are not as engaged

because they don't have their casual fan icon, which is the most popular player in the league, LeBron James. I get it. But the quality of play is better, and I'll tell you why it's better, especially in the Eastern Conference. Especially. Especially in the Eastern Conference because every team thinks they got a chance now. Because they do.

When LeBron was in it, there wasn't a chance. The ability of LeBron going to the Eastern Conference Finals is gone. Is gone. So now every team is scrapping. The Nets are scrapping. Right? Every team is scrapping because they're like, oh, shit. It can go down.

We can make it to the fucking. And then once you're in the finals, it's like. It's anybody's ballgame. King is gone. Throne is open. They did that. I don't know what I said, but I tried to say some shit. They did that?

They did that, that, that, that. I think it's better without LeBron. I mean that sincerely. We get to focus on different relationships and different dynamics, one of which, which has been wildly entertaining, has been Dame Rush. Yeah. This Dame Rush. It's been a great slingshot effect. I'm sorry.

As far as before we get into Dame Rush, the slingshot effect of not having LeBron, yeah, the rating's going to suffer a little bit, but now you're creating all these new megastars. They're already stars like basketball nerds, but this is the first time the general public is really seeing Giannis and how good he is. Really seeing how much of a problem Dame Lillard is. Because LeBron takes so much focus. He takes so much of my focus. I'm in between a casual fan and y'all. So I watch

but I'm not like a junkie. I'm paying attention to LeBron. LeBron is gone. Dame and Russ. What's going on? What's happening in Philly? What's happening in Boston? What's happening in Milwaukee? It's the best thing that happens to the NBA because one, if LeBron gets back to the playoffs next year, it's going to be another ratings bonanza. And, two, the league's in great hands when he's gone.

You know what I mean? It's not like when Jordan left. Exactly. When Jordan left, there was nobody. Right? Now you have these other guys that you promoted. It worked out perfectly. It really worked out 100% perfectly.

And if we can't move to Dame and Russ, I would love to. Yeah, let's do it. Let's do it. This has been, first of all, Dame is a bully. Dame has been bullying Russ, bro. He's been bullying Russ. It has been, because Dame is playing D on Russ. Russ is not playing D on Dame.

He's switching. He's switching. Because Russ has, to Russ's credit, he has a lot more things to worry about as far as getting the team involved and getting rebounds and all that stuff. That's just his game. That's how they play. But Dame is taking the challenge of like, oh, I'm going to stop you and I'm going to drop buckets on you.

And he's not locking him up per se, though. This last game, I think in the second half, Russ was 1 for 7 or 0 for 7 in the second half. Yeah, he didn't shoot that great. He did not shoot that great. And there are guys on you know okc that need to hit shots right and paul george is hurt too but he's without a doubt paul george is hurt there are things that are going down but as far as one-on-one play dame is bullying russ he has a look on him when westbrook is guarding him that you only see from

these super greats where it's just like you are food. I don't give a fuck how many MVPs Russ might activate something in Dame with all that shit talk. That little clip that I said Dame is better than Kyrie and Twitter was hating. Still trying to hate a little bit.

I'm going to get to that too in a little bit. Before the playoffs started, one or two people sent me the GIF of Russ, the video of Russ saying to Dame, I've been busting that ass for years. For years. I think Dame caught wind of that,

heard all the two sweeps in a row shit, 10 straight playoff losses, and was like, something switched. He was like, fuck that. You ever been to a place

where you're just like, yo, fuck all of that? Yeah. I think that's where Dame is. There's no real joy after a win. It's just, we're still going. I'm not done. This is business. And the reason why, I think that's where Dame is. There's no real joy after a win. It's just we're still going. I'm not done.

This is business. And the reason why I think with the Blazers and the Thunder is that I don't think the Thunder play best when Russell Westbrook is playing his best. They play best when Paul George is the dude. Yeah. The Blazers play best when Dame Lillard is doing exactly what he's doing right now. Right. That's just going nuts, pulling from wherever,

getting to the rim, then CJ McCollum gets going, now they got this post-presence with Ennis Cantor, and all these other guys. Barkley's been going hard, saying like, yo, they're going to the finals. And I'm not one to say he sounds crazy saying it, because they match up

really well against the Warriors. I think they're going to get the Thunder out of here. Oh, they ain't going to the finals. I think they're going to the finals. You think the Spurs or the Nuggets are taking them down because that's their second round matchup? The second round matchup. Oh, you meant Western Conference finals. Western Conference finals. Barkley said they're going to the finals. I said I don't think it's crazy.

I can see them in Western Conference finals. But Golden State's beating them. There's no way. It's not even a question. But go on. That's just what I was going to say. Their second round matchup is not. It's going to be the Nuggets or the Spurs. That's not that crazy. Second round is also going to be Rockets-Warriors.

So there's a chance they beat each other up. You can't just breeze through Pop, though. He'll figure out a way. He'll figure out a way to make it a series. He'll clip off some games. And, dude, we're sleeping on San Antonio like they don't have really good pieces. Who the fuck is Derek White? I'm not even talking about the no-name guys that we're finding out about. I'm talking about the core.

They still have DeRozan All-Star. Marcus Aldridge. Aldridge All-Star. And they have a very capable playoff quality player in Rudy Gay. You cannot teach 6'9". Patty Mills also. For sure, for sure. But I'm just talking about the guys who are hovering around elite.

You cannot teach 6'9 and can shoot. Without a doubt, Rudy Gay can get you a decent shot at the end of the game. No matter what. Rudy Gay can get you a decent shot at the end of the game. No matter what. Somebody put out, somebody had like a poll of like your favorite non-All-Star very good players. Rudy Gay. And Rudy Gay is up there.

He's in like the same vein of like a J.R. Smith. Better. Depending on who you look at. Rudy's going to give you 20-point games in the playoffs. Exactly. You know what I mean? There's always a spot for somebody on a playoff team that could get you 20 at a moment's notice. Paul Millsap. Paul Millsap.

Playoff Paul Millsap. Takes the fucking season off and then wins you a playoff game per series by himself. Yeah. And I don't know if Rudy's as good, but Rudy, he can break out a game. And on top of that, he's not asked to do much. He's never asked to do too much. Just come and give me 20 minutes. Just come and get us some buckets, yo.

That's it. Whatever you get. If you get hot, you'll stay in for 30 minutes. That's it. And get it going. But like, DeRozan's the guy. Derek White, exactly whoever the fuck Derek White is. I never heard of this motherfucker all of a sudden.

Two 30-point games? Is it two? That's it. I think he had two. I think he had 36 in game four. He had the one big breakout where everybody's like, who the fuck is this kid? So if you get that from the role players,

I mean, that's one thing people always say, right, is like playoff games are often won by role players because the stars on each team mitigate each other. Nobody has better role players in any other team in the league than the Spurs, and that's been their history. And they by far have the best coach. They lost a good point guard at the beginning of the year. What's his name?

They lost Deontay Murray. Oh, yeah. They lost him. And I think Lonnie Walker. How do you say his name? Is it Dejounte or Deontay? I don't know. I usually assume with black people that Jay is silent, so it's Deontay.

Yo, I love Michael Ordon, bro. Michael Ordon. You know, I like Uwan Howard. You like Uwan Howard Uwan Howard Uwan Howard is Man Bro I was listening to

A song about Michael Axson The other day bro And that fucking That song was amazing dude Nah yeah I think I think I think

I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think

I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think

I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think

I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think

I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think

I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think games at all. But yeah, on top of that, they got Greg Popovich. All right, let's bump back into the conversation.

Yeah. So, ump, jump, anyway. Ump, pack. I thought you said unpack.

I thought you said bump back in. No, no. Got it. So, okay, back to where we were. We have an interesting series.

I think it's pretty apparent that the Rockets get out of here. They're sweeping. Unscaved. Yeah. I think it's pretty apparent that the Rockets get out of here unscathed. I think that Golden State gets out of here unscathed. Gentleman sweep. Gentleman sweep. I think that OKC is done next game. I think it's a gentleman sweep as well.

Yeah. And I think it could be interesting between Denver and— Oh, that's interesting. It's 2-1 right now. It's 2-1. It's 2-1. And I think Denver has a very sneaky—not even sneaky good. They have a very good home court advantage.

So I think they take one of the next two games. So it either goes 6 or 7 with the Spurs and the Nuggets. The Spurs, like we said before, they're a team with great role players. So you're never just going to knock them out. If they're on the ropes, they'll usually come back. So six games or seven games is where I got it with Denver and San Antonio. Who do you think is taking it? I think the Spurs might take it.

That's what I'm saying. I'm like, dog, I don't bet against Pop, bro. If you already got two on you, in the best of three. The coaching make a big difference in the playoffs, and they got both. Ask yourself how many coaches, like in the best of three. Experiencing coaching make a big difference in the playoffs, and they got both. Like ask yourself how many coaches you take in the best of three in the entire NBA. Yeah. Not many over pop. No.

Especially in the first round. So, I mean, who knows? And if you see them, and if they match up against Portland or OKC. That'd be a good series, too. That'd be a very good series. I'd like to see that. I think Portland can make it to the conference finals, I think, I don't think they beat the Warriors but I think they give them trouble. I think they match up

really good with the Warriors. Just cause, you know. What about the Rockets? If the Rockets can take the Warriors. I think the Rockets are only. Do we think that's possible? You know Dame wants that Steph matchup. Dame wants it. Dame wants it right now, dog. He wants it so bad. I hope this is his dirt year for that dirt 2011

year where it's just like, whatever, man. I'm the best player. I was going to say, if Dave Lillard goes through the murderer's row of point guards, like you take out Westbrook, you take out fucking Pop or whatever, or Jamal Murray, and you take out either Curry or Harden at the playoffs, and then you go to the finals, I don't want to hear him being underrated ever again. Like, just admit we're sleepy and he plays in Portland and we fall asleep before we get to watch him.

There's nothing underrated about that dude. He's been a beast like this for a long time. In real talk, if you're a casual fan, I'm going to watch the Warriors on the West Coast time or the Blazers. I'm watching the Warriors. That's why we don't realize how good Dame is. And even then, a lot of people just end up watching the Lakers. That's all the same the Warriors. That's why we don't realize how good Dame is. You're right. And even then, a lot of people just end up watching the Lakers.

That's all the same time zone. Even though they suck, people will watch them. Okay, let's check out Eastern Conference. Yeah, let's check that out, man. Because I think the Rockets, I think both four fives got very lucky with their matchups in both conferences. Rockets, Jazz. The Jazz are a weak five.

And I think Celtics, Pacers, without Oladipo. People keep telling me, Kaz posted this dumb shit about Kyrie's winning percent in the playoffs. They're playing the Pacers without Oladipo. They haven't had Oladipo for most of half the season. They still managed to beat them. The second half of the season,

they dropped from a 2-3 seed to a 5. It was only separated by a few games. Look at those 2-3 seeds. Sure. In the playoffs, though, it's closing time. You need a a winner i don't know who's kairi cooking up real hard right now who's the playoff uh the point guard for the the page beats the fuck out of me but but but you gotta understand i know people say like oh well lebron won a lot of those games yo kairi won a lot of those games too especially game seven in the finals like the championship series

yeah lebron got the block. Kyrie's the one who hit the shot, and he had like 40 that game too. So it wasn't just steamrolling into the playoffs. Nobody questions Kyrie's ability. Nobody questions how many points that he can score in a game on a given night. I would never question his offensive ability. What we question is how effective he is being the leader of a team. Seems to be pretty effective.

We'll see. I think they go up against Milwaukee, and I think that Kyrie is going to go up against Milwaukee against a very tough point guard. Excuse me. I've got these hiccups. What the fuck is his name? Eric Bledsoe.

You know what could happen? Eric Bledsoe and Holmoy comes back, the rookie of the year a couple years ago. Very steady dude. Virginia. I forgot his fucking name. He won Rookie of the Year. He wasn't that big fucking... Please look him up. I forgot his name. He plays for the Bucs.

And he's coming back from injury? From injury. I think it was his toe or some shit. Malcolm Brogdon. Very, very good point guard. Average is like 16 a game. Very solid. Brogdon. Very, very good point guard. Average is like 16 a game. Very solid. Brogdon plays like a two. Both. He's a combo guy. He's great in Markham up defensively. You know what's interesting though?

Real quick about Kyrie going up against an Eric Bledsoe. Eric Bledsoe is a very strong, undeniable, he's a dog. Unbelievably strong and athletic point guard. Now, I don't think that anybody can stay in front of Kyrie.

But I think you can wear Kyrie down on the other side as well. Yes. And if Kyrie is going to match up with Eric, he's going to be chasing Eric around. And I think they should run Kyrie's ass and pick and roll all fucking day. Post him up every once in a while. Just bully him. I'm sure you can. I think that's how you wear down Kyrie.

I think you cannot stop him offensively. You just try to contain, but the way that you do it is you go at him because he is not a good defender, one. And two, he will get tired and his body will break down. He is not a solidly built NBA player. We know he's capable of injury, and you have a team in Milwaukee that has several guys that you can attack,

put on attack mode on a pick-and-roll switch, right? Obviously, Giannis, right? But Chris Middleton, have him chasing Chris Middleton for the closeouts. Nobody wants to close out every single play. And Kyrie is one of those lazy type of defenders where he's just going to half-ass close out with his hand out. Chris Middleton's another guy. He could win you a playoff game by himself.

Knockdown. Knockdown. Absolutely. So I am really curious about this series, and I don't think that the Boston Celtics make it out alive. I don't either. I'm not sold that Milwaukee wins. I am not completely sold on Milwaukee yet. I just think they don't have any experience.

This round or? After when they beat Boston. I'm not positive they beat Boston. No, they're winning against Detroit. But one thing that could be interesting, Kyrie, I think, could have problems with Bledsoe because Bledsoe is just kind of a dog. He could cook him. He could. Yeah.

But you know who cooked Bledsoe last year? Terry Rozier. That's very true. Scary Terry. Is it possible? Is it possible? Terry Rozier is just a better matchup for Bledsoe? Yeah.

And then how does that sit with Kyrie if they win the series because Terry Rozier comes and cooks Bledsoe? Yeah. So maybe he will get cooked. I mean, there's no way Terry Rozier is more effective offensively than Kyrie. I just felt like Bledsoe would be a stressful person to play against. I would assume so. I mean, if Terry just bullied him.

One thing we're not paying into account, and I do think the Bucs take the second round. I also think that this Boston Celtics team matches up best with Milwaukee because Giannis is probably the best player available in the entire Eastern Conference. And they got three wings that will make life not hard for Giannis, but he's going to have to make it work. Gordon Hayward's been hooping again. Has he?

He had 20 points last night, and he played pretty well in the series. So you have Hayward. You got Jalen Brown. Jalen Brown and Jason Tatum. And I'm not against putting Horford on Giannis every once in a while. Those are four guys that Giannis is going to—he guards all five positions. Those are four guys that could get buckets on you and is going to make you work hard. And Jonas has an incredible motor.

He's a freak of nature as far as athletically, but there's nobody else left in the Eastern Conference that's going to give him that much trouble on defense. I think Toronto because of Kawhi. Yeah, Kawhi, but he's just one guy is what I'm saying. They have Pascal too. Pascal Siakam is also really good. This is interesting. Teams in the East, this is something that we're finding out, and I think it lends itself to the past culture, probably lends itself,

but teams in the East are preparing for Giannis. They got to. Now, Giannis is just a more athletic version of lebron but the reason why you draft a guy like pascal siakam is because you're like okay i need some who could bang and defend lebron the reason why you have right i mean i mean pascal siakam has played like a very very poor man's yannis this season. He had fucking, he dropped 30 or something this past week. He's hooping. Same type of game, same range-y long.

You know what I mean? He can hit a little jump shot, but he gets to the cup and he finishes over everybody. Like, he's very good defensively. He's scrappy. He's a perfect compliment for Kawhi Leonard. I didn't anticipate him coming to the season being this good this fast. It's going to be tough.

The road to the finals is not. Yeah. Yeah. It's all interesting. And I'm not sure that Philly. I'm not sure Brooklyn doesn't come back and take another game. Interesting. I think Philly is.

Embiid's knee scares me. Why? Or his leg. Because he's not healthy. If you watch him, dog, he looks like Patrick Ewing. He's only like 23 years old. He's like a big Kyrie. You can't trust his knees.

You can't trust his legs at all, man. And he's talking a lot of shit. Jared Dudley, you can tell he's got to give him one. The next game is do or die. If they don't get into something or he has a big old target on his leg, I'm not saying go after his leg. Nobody wants to see anybody hurt. But the dude just fucking pretty much laughed at your face about elbow in your center i think even if they take a game though sixers win right six is winning six

or seven they stole game five and that or four i'm saying i'm saying they'll take it but like it's not gonna be not gonna be easy second round raptors beat raptors beat the i think so i think and then raptors make it to the finals that was my pick to make it to the finals. Yeah, I think Raptors end up beating Milwaukee. Well, okay. Raptors beat Milwaukee if Kyle Lowry plays decently. If Kyle Lowry plays like how Kyle Lowry plays in the playoffs, which is goes, goes, gets pussy, then I think Milwaukee makes out. But I think the whole thing hinges on Lowry.

If Lowry can be somewhat effective, you don't have to be I don't need 30 points from you. 16 and 8. You drop 16 and 8 on decent shooting, you guys make it to the finals. Listen, we're in the

finals and it's Golden State and Toronto. That was my pick. I don't know if Golden State... I said Golden State wouldn't win it just because. I think that's a decent matchup, though. I think Pascal and Kawhi can give those wings problems.

The thing is, this is like, we go back to... Now, I know we don't know, and I know that you have Kevin Durant and it throws a whole wrench in the system, but you can't stop but go back to the Spurs-Golden State game one before Kawhi goes down. Yeah. He's dominating.

They were dominating them. On 20. And he was just destroying everything. And it's like, what the fuck? And you can tell Kawhi's had that, like, lasered, like, yo, I want that back. Run it back. We got to run that back. Run that back.

Who you got with me? I think Marc Gasol helps them a lot. I think Seahawks. Huge. Huge. He's a huge get for them. Listen, think about Marc Gasol on the block with. Boak it now.

Oh, that's food. It's not cousins. First of all, that's food for them. But if they play small ball, if Golden State plays small ball and Draymond, 6'7", Draymond, is on the block with a legit center. Legit all-star center. Legit all-star center, meaning like moves. He can get to the back.

He can shoot over you. Best thing he can do is get foul trouble on Draymond, and then what happens? If Draymond's in foul trouble, then what? It's a way more interesting series than the average viewer believes it will be. Of course. It is a competitive series. I think you obviously give the edge to Golden State, but there are

factors at play here that get me very excited. Yeah. Very excited. I think Toronto sneaks a game early. Maybe not game one, but I think game two. Toronto sneaks a game in. Toronto not game one, but I think game two. Toronto sneaks a game in. Toronto could win the whole fucking thing, man.

I know everybody says I hate on Toronto last year. I didn't believe. I believe this year. Lowry scares me. I hope. I love him. He walks just like little Duval. I got a soft spot for him in my heart.

He got a Duval body. But I think they could do it, man. I'm a big Kawhi believer, maybe to a fault. I picked him to be MVP last year. He played zero games. I love Kawhi. I think Kawhi's an amazing player. I think when he's on, there's nobody in the East better than him.

I think Giannis has played the best in the Eastern Conference, but when Kawhi is on, nobody can touch him offensively or defensively. That being said, the Warriors still got Kevin Durant, though. He's the great fucking equalizer. When Steph don't got it going, the Warriors still got Kevin Durant, though. He's the great fucking equalizer. When Steph don't got it going, when Klay's a little off, if Dre's in foul trouble, they still got that seven-footer that they give it to and can do

anything. And the way he's fucking feeling himself this postseason with the, I'm Kevin Durant, you know who the fuck, you know who I am type of shit. I haven't watched any Warriors games because it's a waste of my time. Let me ask you this. I got two Warriors questions, though, that since y'all watch more, you can answer. But do you want to pay a bill first?

Yes. All right. Let's go. Let's go for it. Let's do that. Let's pull that up. Okay. We're going to pay some real shit right now, bro.

We're not playing around. Okay. Guys, it can be a little frustrating, especially if you're in a hurry or running late, to find yourself at a railway crossing waiting for a train. Okay. Just let me paint this visual for you. Now, the signals are going and the train's not even there yet. So you might feel tempted to cross that street, cross that walk, to just run,

to go for it, sneak across those tracks. Well, listen, don't you ever do that. Trains are often going a lot faster than you expect them to be, Alex. And you know what? If there's anything that Denzel Washington taught us,

they can't stop. There was a whole movie, took like two hours to stop the train. I think the movie was literally called Unstoppable. Do you guys remember that one? Yeah, he's also Pelham 123. That's another train. This guy's the worst.

Even if the engineer hits the brakes right away, it can take a train over a mile to stop. And by that time, what used to be your car is just a crushed hunk of metal. And what used to be you, well, hey, you better not think about that. The point is, you can't know how quickly a train will arrive. The train can't stop even if it sees you the results are disaster so if the signals are on the train is on its way and you just need to remember one thing stop because trains can't this is brought to you by n-h-t-s-a okay the Highway Trans Authority, I think it's called. Traffic Safety.

National Highway Traffic Safety. Man, I really made that shit. National Highway Trans Association. Trans Association. Wait, what? All you trannies on the highway. This is weird. But I really milked that shit.

Did you guys feel that? Did you feel like you were in the car? Did you feel like you were waiting for the train? I felt scared just now. I was like, where? I thought there was like, I thought a joke was coming. Did you guys feel that? Did you feel like you were in the car? Did you feel like you were waiting for the train? I felt scared just now. I thought there was like, I thought a joke was coming. I was like, oh, nah, this shit's serious. We don't take this shit seriously. It's all about trains.

Push that door closed for us, Hector. Thank you, sir. Thank you. All right, two golden steak questions. Go. Number one, I read on ESPN that Draymond Green lost 23 pounds in six weeks to get in shape for the playoff run. Yeah. Do you buy into that, improving his game at all?

No. I don't either. Why don't I? Because it's really hard to lose that many pounds that quickly. Yeah, why are you losing this many pounds? I'm confused. I don't know. That's a lot of weight in six weeks.

Maybe he just gained a lot of weight during the season, and now he's back to regular weight. Is he in a contract here? No, but if he makes all defense, I think he's eligible for a super max. Something like that. He ain't getting no super max. I wouldn't even max him out. I'll be honest with you. He played like dog shit this year.

And they were fine. But do you think he's going to play well in the post? It was just a weird story to me. Why you just get in shape in February or March? Because that's how fucking good the Warriors are. It's like, you know what, I think I'm just going to be in half good shape for 60 games. Don't you think that catches up at some point, though? Yeah.

They're not trying. And it might catch up in the playoffs. It really might. Stan Van Gundy's been, like, really big on that this entire postseason. Yeah? Stan. Stan. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's commentating, too? he's been like really big on that this entire postseason it's like yeah stan stan yeah yeah yeah he was on espn he was talking about like yo like the warriors are so they play so arrogantly

they've just been like getting away with making just fundamentally terrible like defensive mistakes like rotation wise like really like big coach speak and shit like that right and he was saying like he he was another one who's like, I'm not sold on them getting back to the finals. He's like, he thinks the Blazers and the Rockets match up really well with them. Those are the teams that you've got to defend throughout the entire game. You can't just bullshit with them like the Clippers and all that stuff. And you bullshit with the Clippers.

You lost the game at home. So he was like, if they get the arrogance get away with them I think he said something along the lines of like boogie going down like sucks for them but he said it was probably the best thing for that team because like they were just kind of like getting by on talent and not playing like team defense that they usually used to do when they went when they made their finals run so I don't know I don't know I don't I don't necessarily don't agree with it. They've been pretty arrogant. This dude on the ticket hates how arrogant they play,

and he went through and did his own little research. And he went through all the dynasties and looked at the final years they won championships where they should be the fattest. They had like, he went through their whole wins and losses, zero 20-point losses at home for the Bulls, the Lakers in their last year, the Spurs the last year they won a championship, the Warriors. They had some 20-point losses all on the road. The Warriors have had five or six 20-point losses at home this year.

Yikes. Which is like, you just don't give a fuck. And it's hard. Shaq said it too. It's hard to flip a switch. And that's coming from the number one flip a switch motherfucker I've seen in my lifetime. Yeah. He didn't flip a switch until like after the All-Star break.

Yeah. And it caught up to him. He was just flip a switch until after the All-Star break. He would just cruise. Kobe hated him. He would come into the season out of shape and shit. He would just rest. He would just have a toe injury for two months. And mind you, Kobe Bryant's a fucking maniac and training a psycho all season. And everyone's like, oh, this is Shaq's team.

Shaq's the man. And Kobe's like, dude, this guy doesn't even give a fuck. He doesn't give a fuck until March. I'm not saying they're for sure going to lose because they're so overwhelmingly talented you have to pick them. But I'm saying I don't think they're going to win. And I think that's why. I think they're one bad, not even injury, but they could get a little dinged up.

That's been their Achilles heel for the past couple seasons. Like, Steph Curry will get dinged up a little bit. He won't miss a game, but he'll still play, but he'll be kind of going half speed. He can't really guard nobody. You know what I'm saying? That happens to one of their main guys, and literally anybody in the West could take it. Second question I have. Is KD the best player in the league?

If so, do we care? He is. Do we care if he is? Yeah yeah you know who the best player might be i mean it's lebron but outside of lebron i don't even think i'm i don't i think it's steph man i think steph i think steph is a better player they need steph more on that team stuff's definitely the most important player on that team like he's definitely the keys to that car i i really think he is the best player because what he does is so dynamic i'm not as worried about kd hurting me off the dribble yeah i'm not as well i'm not saying he can't do

it but i'm not as worried i think steph is as effective shooting off the dribble or running around screens and as effective going to the basket off the dribble and finishing at the rim it's he puts so much pressure on your defense yeah it is unbelievable what you have to do to deal yeah with stuff like when you looked at the way clippers were playing them they were just denying the three-point line they were like hey we'll give you the lane we'll give you twos we're just denying above outside like we've shifted the whole conventional wisdom of basketball. You know who he kind of reminds me of? Steph, to kind of switch sports a little bit. Steph,

important to the game. Barry Sanders is a close comparison. I was thinking like Drew Brees. He has such a he plays so downhill that once he gets going, everybody just fucking goes crazy. Like KD isn't a huge ball stopper like the way Melo is,

but when he gets it going, like, you kind of got to stop the ball for him. Yeah. But when Steph gets it going and he's taking shots like three seconds to the fucking shot clock and then, like,

everybody else is getting open shots and he's pulling and all that shit, like, there's nothing you can do. KD a much better defender, though. Of course. He offers more on defense and that's undeniable and having a guy with that wingspan closing out changes the trajectory of shots.

It's a different game. Don't get me wrong. But I think what Steph offers outside of his shooting, just the pressure he puts on a defense. Yeah, the whole defense. Makes it so much easier for everybody there. And not just the pressure on the defense. He just changes the pace of the game. much easier for everybody there. And not just the pressure on the defense. He just changes the pace

of the game. The reason why I compare him to Drew Brees is because Drew Brees plays so fast and gets everybody involved. It's not like he just has one go-to guy that he gets it to. And KD being the scorer he is, that's like a go-to guy. He just fills up the bucket.

You know what's crazy about KD? He hasn't ever played without an elite player. Point guard at that. But he had Russ, who's one of the most athletic players in history. Top 10 player in the league. Now he's got Steph and Klay and Draymond. Very lucky.

Very fortunate. Giannis has never had... Giannis is the point guard. Giannis is everything on that team. Everybody else is cool. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. He's had nothing.

And it'll be interesting to see what happens. See if they can land some big free agents. It'll be interesting to see what happens

up there in Milwaukee because who doesn't want to play with a guy like Giannis? Yeah. Giannis has made it clear that he's not going anywhere.

Right. You know what I mean? Like he's not maybe he's not going anywhere but at the same time he's one of those guys that just

doesn't give a fuck about like going to like LA or New York and none of that shit. he's like I'm a basketball player I want to play here it's the best opportunity play ball yeah no yeah I mean we're talking about goats while we're talking about goats what why don't we talk about Kate Smith one of the greatest now I only I only saw the clip on first day today so you gotta like put me on Gabby at the speed. Paco, you break it down because this is your girl. So yeah, this is my girl.

Meaning I did the research. I read the article. So apparently she sang a rendition of God Bless America, was it? God Bless America. That was really beautiful. They played it at all the Flyers games for the NFL and one other sports team. And then Philly just took down her statue because apparently she got some racist lyrics. And some people say it's satire

and some people say who cares or they don't believe that it's satire. So they took down the statue. My first question is, why does this bitch have a statue? She's a singer. It's a fucking hockey team. Why does she get a statue?

She gets a statue at the stadium? That's it, right? No, I think it was just in the city. That's a big bitch. Yeah, she get a statue? She gets a statue at the stadium? That's it, right? No, I think it was just in the city. That's a big bitch. That ain't nothing but a deal. She healthy.

That's a deal before she broke up with her man and found blackness. Is the big woman here? That's the statue, right? That's an ugly statue. Let's see the statue.

I bet her kids took that shit down like this. I am trying to look at this. Oh, bro. Yeah, flyers. It's outside the flyers christ she looks like winston churchill why did you give her a statue in the first place i don't understand oops you okay i got a little hiccups so now they just put it in a burka

now she's converted to islam remember you look like a towel mate that's oh that's what it looks like not look like a towel but that's so stupid it's like we we want we don't want to put any attention to this go back to her statues let's just cover it let's go back to giant blankets okay let's just be honest about this statue. She's an ugly woman. She's very ugly. She looks like my dad. There's an ugly woman statue.

You need an excuse to get rid of it. You can get rid of any old person's statue by just saying they're racist because everyone was racist back in the day, right? Literally, if you don't want a statue up, just Google something they said back in the day. It's not going to be that. Racism was culture back then. Exactly. It's not going to be very progressive. It's convenient. I don't even think it's about the song.

I just think they don't want to sing in Fat Bitch right in front of whatever this park is. Look at the outfit she's wearing. She's not even dressed for an occasion. She's wearing a nightie. She looks like a bralette Christopher Lloyd. Dude! Dude!

Great Scott. Great Scott. It's about your kids, Marty. Great Scott, Philly. Jesus Christ. Dude. Wow, man. That's a husky bitch.

The city of brotherly love. Yeah. So, yeah, I think you just got to get it out of here. I mean, just because the statue sucks yeah who gives a singer a statue like you have michael jackson do we are supposed to read the and highlight the lyrics here michael jackson's statues here's a song that kate smith sang these are the lyrics that's that the title is that's why darkies were born and the first lyric is someone had to pick someone had to pick the corn someone had to slave and be able to sing both of those things that's why darkies

were born oh my god you know what's gonna happen somebody's gonna cut out the clip of you saying this without rhythm that's why the comedian Andrew song. Oh, you're right. Without rhythm. You're just going to be like, that's why the... Comedian Andrew Schultz. I feel like this is like... I really do think it could be satire. Did I do a good job pretending I didn't know the lyrics by heart? But shit is so racist, it's just funny. It could be so racist.

It's blatant, bro. It's like... The song's called That's Why Darkies Were Born. That's why I think it could be satire, because that's the point of satire, is to be so over the top that it's like, obviously a joke. Sing, sing when you're weary. Sing when you're blue.

Sing, sing, that's what you taught all the white folks to do. Sing, that's what you taught all the white folks to do. Sing, that's what you taught all the white folks to do. You taught the white folks how to sing. I taught all the white folks how to sing. Someone had to fight the devil, shout about Gabriel's horn. Someone had to stoke the train that would bring God's children to green pastures. That's why darkies were born. You guys ready for the second song?

There's more songs? Okay, I'm not reading that. Don't read that. Oh, my God. The pickaninnies? What does that mean? Is that a bad word? I heard so boom.

That's a weird I, so boom. Yeah, exactly. So, you know, the picnics, they derive from, you know, that's where white people used to take to go watch lynchings. Like, they would pick food. What? Yeah. So, the picninnies, that's what. There you go. Defense of the regulatory tone for black children. What kind of snacks would you bring to that?

Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ. Great big watermelons roll around. Hold on! So, watermelons are really white people's shit? This is an old beer. Holy shit. No, white people were bringing watermelons are really white people's shit Holy shit No white people are bringing watermelons to the piccaninny Luscious pork chop bushes growing right outside your doorway

In the pic She's singing about heaven Yo alright So heaven is just a bunch of piccaninnies No She's singing about what heaven is like For a young A negro

Like after we get lynched at the picnic Now they got pork chops And watermelons for you That sounds like a great heaven She's trying to say like where you're going afterwards Is actually good She'll be waiting for you in the pickin' Oh there's a pickin' in heaven

Yeah that's what she's singing about Yeah she's segregating heaven And old black Joe is their Santa Claus. Yo, this is wildly racist. How did you get a statue? Yo, son, I've heart that they've even got a Swanee River made of lemonade. Strawberry lemonade! Say it's strawberry lemonade!

Say it's strawberry lemonade! Oh, we do love that strawberry lemonade. That's a Brett Ernst joke. That's a Brett Ernst, man. He had a joke about how he used to work at the Cheesecake Factory, and he goes, let me tell you something I learned. Black people love strawberry lemonade. Then he goes, their voice literally gets higher when they see it on the menu.

He goes, they got strawberry lemonade! They got strawberry lemonade! They got strawberry lemonade! It's fucking delicious. Who doesn't love strawberry lemonade? Point it to these psychos that don't drink strawberry lemonade. This bitch is wildly racist. You got to get rid of that. This bitch right here.

So what's her version of God Bless America? Just a regular version? God Bless White America. So like Stand Beside Her, that's her song? No, she had a rendition of it. How's it sound? It's like a perfectly good non-racist version of God Bless America. Why would they use her version?

Because you don't know. Wait, she changed the lyrics to God Bless America? No, it's just like her version. Like Ray Charles' America the Beautiful is amazing, right? Isn't that the one? America the Beautiful? Don't play it because, you know our video might get taken down okay gotcha damn look at her right there bro fuck she's so happy to be racist God damn

Oh my god Look at her scream What is she saying You read the lyrics You know that's what she's yelling Pick it at ease What There's no reason for you to sing that hard

About that She's so pissed. Oh, my God. Look at this one right here. Fucking terrible. Close your mouth, lady. Yeah, fuck that bitch. We call her bitch, right?

Oh, we can call that bitch a bitch. That's two acceptances to my bitch rule. Take that bitch's statue down. And it was outside of the financial. That's crazy. Wow. Philly trying to act like it's not outside of the financial. That's crazy, son. Wow. Philly trying to act like it's not racist

is the funniest shit in the world to me. It is. You know what's hilarious? It is. They do front. Remember the Bill Burr thing about how like

you got a fucking statue of Rocky? You could have a statue. You got a real life champion. Joe Frazier is from here. Rocky's make-believe. It's a make-believe character. You have an actual

great fighter from this city. You're so racist. You can't let him have that, so you put this fucking five-foot Italian statue. Like, Donovan McNabb's not going to get a statue outside of the stadium. Not at all. They're like, nah, this bitch sang some cool songs back in the day. Let's make sure. How is the voice, though?

Oh, gosh. Can somebody get the voice up on the It sounds like old timey music It sounds like Keep playing like five seconds of her God bless her Just play it off your phone And we can like listen to it

Not straight Alex said it's racist Because it don't slap If it slapped We'd be okay with it Solid rule Alex Like that Christmas song About rape

It's not about rape It is The bitch just wants to leave Oh she sung What's it called Maybe it's cold outside The bitch just wants to leave Oh she sung What you call it Maybe it's cold outside She does not want to leave That song is rapey as fuck

No it's not Y'all are wildin yo What do you mean she doesn't want to leave She can't leave I'm gonna be honest with you I know you're right But it's very funny How rapey you sound

When you're like She don't want to leave And we're like Yeah she do And you're like I don't know I don't know These bitches don't want to leave

Nobody Hold on Let me listen to this bitch. Get your own water fountain. Ew. She don't even sing that good.

Yeah. Is that her God Bless America? That's terrible. Like if it was Adele, I'd be like, all right. For a fat bitch, her voice is mad regular, bro. That's what I'm saying. You've got to sing way better than that for being fat. You've got a size four voice.

Yeah, exactly. And she was in shape with that voice? She's not even singing. She's just talking. So a lot of those lyrics we were reading, she was just like yelling about. Yeah, I don't yelling about not even on rhythm i don't know man i just don't listen i don't the whole taking down statues thing alex kind of brought me over to the side but i don't care if you take down a statue but why she have a statue

that's why we need to be more picky about who gets statues right that's a good point you can't just give every motherfucker a statue bitch saying a song you like that just speaks to just how beautifully racist this country i'll give beyonce a statue. Bitch sang a song you like. That just speaks to just how beautifully racist this country was. I'll give Beyonce a statue in modern America and that's it. Bruno Mars got to wait. I'm going to fuck you up. Beyonce deserves a statue. That's it.

Who else? Maybe Jay. A smaller statue than Beyonce. Yeah. He cheated. You know what I mean? That's what he gets. Who else gets a statue?

She ain't got no bigger statue than I do. Yo, that's a good question. Who deserves statues? I lose right now. LeBron in Cleveland definitely deserves a statue. Definitely LeBron gets a statue. Okay. Beyonce, Houston, Jay-Z, Brooklyn.

Who else deserves some statues? Steph Curry in Oakland. Steph Curry, Oakland. Absolutely. Dirk in Dallas. Marshawn Lynch in Oakland. That's all we got. Yo, Dirk?

Got y'all fucking championships. Dirk for sure gets one. Dirk? D-Wade's going to got Yo Dirk Got y'all y'all Fucking championships Dirk for sure gets one Dirk D-Wade's gonna get one in Miami I don't think he deserves one I don't know about D-Wade He deserves it

Drake in Toronto Drake in Toronto Yeah I can see that I don't like Drake Drake deserves one in Toronto So Drake deserves one in Toronto And Dwayne Wade doesn't deserve one in Miami No

He's the most winningest athlete In Miami history He's getting a statue No no He gets one He just doesn't deserve it He got one. He's getting a statue. No, no. He gets one. He just doesn't deserve it. He got one. Dan Marino has a statue.

He can't get one? He definitely doesn't deserve it. Dan Marino has zero chips. I would never give Dan Marino a statue. We're not saying that everyone who has one deserves it. Okay. We're saying that who deserves it? Does Eli get one?

That's a good one. I don't think that he should, man. I lean toward that he shouldn't. And there's a great argument. Derek Jeter. One second, one second I lean toward that he shouldn't. And there's a great argument. Derek Jeter. One second, one second. Jeter. Of course, of course, of course.

But the Eli one is tricky. They can rename Yankee Stadium Jeter Stadium. The Eli one is tricky because he did bring you two fucking championships. Yeah. And he brought them. But when we're looking at himself and his greatness, man, I don't know. I don't think so, bro. He had a lot of help.

And y'all had three rings before that. That's the other thing. Y'all had wins before. That's right. Now, Dwayne Wade brought Miami there first, but then he got two with the help of LeBron, and the first one he got with the help of Tim Donahue, so it was like, whatever. And Shaq. And Shaq.

Tim Donahue and Shaq. Brady gets one, for sure. Brady, Belichick. Belichick should and Shaq. Brady gets one for sure. Brady. Belichick. Belichick should get one. Belichick for sure. He getting a statue for sure. Belichick deserves a statue.

Okay, who else? This is a fun one. Crap, you get a statue where you get a little handjob from an Asian girl. Is the video of his dick out yet? I want to see his dick. I think it leaked. I think it leaked. I'm going to try to take it down.

Google it. Funny word choice. It leaked. It leaked. All right. Okay, who else? Statues. There's got to be some country singer that needs one.

Garth Brooks or some shit. Lil Nas X. He for sure gets one. Who else? Goddamn. Ronaldo. He already got one. Oh, Cristiano Ronaldo. Cristiano Ronaldo already got one.

Yeah, for sure. Messi getting one? You've got to give Messi one. You've got to give Messi one. Ronaldo and you've got to give Messi one. You've got to give Messi a statue. I'm going to be honest. I already feel like we've given enough away.

I mean, this is in different cities. It's not like it's all in one place. Even on Earth, that's a lot of statues. There's a lot of statues. If there's a racist fat bitch, he'd get a statue. Yeah, yeah. Leonardo Messi. I'm saying, starting over.

We're starting over. No more statues left. Kim Jong-, he'd get a statue. Yeah, yeah. Leonardo Messi. I'm saying, starting over. We're starting over. No more statues left. Kim Jong-un. He got a thousand of his own already. Oh, really? Here's the way you solve that. Here's a perfect way to solve the too many statues dilemma. You make holograms.

Make nice little holograms that people would come and visit. You could see them in their youthful self. Like, you make the little Tupac hologram. You make the Biggie holograms and shit. The Michael Jackson hologram. The little Michael Jackson hologram, all that shit. You can interact with it. Put it outside the stadium.

Once you do some racist shit, just turn it off. Just turn the shit off. But, hey, we can't. Yo, that's a quick fix, bro. That's a quick fucking fix, bro. Like, yo, fuck this statue. And then if we ever forgive them it's like you know what turn that

shit back on turn that shit back on y'all I was at a wedding this weekend dead ass ignition remix was playing

dead fucking ass bro what did you react did you dance to it hell yeah I had a funny ass joke there was no kids

allowed at the reception whatever he said that uh he said he wants to start a business where he um edits the R. Kelly songs out of people's wedding videos. So you got a wedding video that's going to last forever. And it got this rapist fucking songs all over it.

So he'll just change them out. He'll switch them out. And then you're good. You can continue watching your video guilt free. I can't believe you think Baby's Cold Outside is about rape. It is about rape. Fam, rape is rape. Shoot or shoot, rape is rape.

So it's like rape ain't slowballing that shit. He already got Shorty in the crib. He can do whatever he want with it. The bitch sang for three stanzas how she wants to go home. She's like, baby, don't stay. She didn't say, I want to go home. She goes, I really can't stay. Baby, it's cold outside.

Now she want to go home. She goes, I really can't stay. Baby, it's cold out. That's you want to suck dick. If you say this shit, I really can't stay, you're just saying, throat me. Throat me now. You would say, I'm leaving. That's I got to go, I'm leaving. So the next line is, I got to get away. No, it's not. No, but for real, though.

I really can't stay. I'm a status to defend Andrew. He's not gonna say this, but I've actually seen the song is from a movie, and in the movie, it's like a playful thing where the girl's like smiling. She's like, I should go, and it's like in Southern California. So it's BW. So the point is, it's BW.

It's definitely BW, but also it's like hot outside. So the whole song's a joke. It's in Cali. It's in LA. Oh, wait, really? I did not know this. Man, I thought you knew this shit and you were just playing. But also it's like hot outside so the song is like a whole the whole song I did not know this shit and you were just playing so was the Martin I didn't I really notice Yeah, look this shit up why would you think I know not the lyrics look up the story behind it Why would you think I know about this? Be researching shit you be knowing random shit be knowing random shit. I don't know about this. You're the king of knowing random shit. Yeah, but I ain't like these white motherfuckers.

Respect, G. Yo, can we go to the lyrics? Damn, nah. You're absolutely wrong. It was in New York City. Yeah. I don't know what the fuck we called it. I thought it was a movie, dog. You just became a rainbow. I got this. I got this. You just became

the right movie. Look it up. Look it up. What's it say? Which movie? It's in some movie. I saw this shit on... Oh.

Okay. Oh, shit. Yo, can you just go to the lyrics so I can read it in different ways? Oh, there's a clip right there. Go to the lyrics.

Real quick, go back up. No, no, no. Don't play it. Go back up. Okay. This is Dean Martin Baby It's Cold Outside Okay

I'll be the guy I'm the guy You're the girl Nah I'm the girl Okay you're the girl You're so gay I'm the girl

Alright ready go Go I really can't stay Oh my god You gotta keep going son Oh shit That was your part I've gotta go away

Ain't my part No you sing You're the parenthesis You sing parenthesis You sing the non parenthesis Alright alright That was me Let me take an L on that

Y'all are fucking crazy For no reason Go I really can't stay Stay bitch I've gotta go away Stay bitch The evening has been

But I've been hoping that you'd drop in Hold on This is your pocket Flavor and Idol That's how it's sung Bro, I was going to sing the rape music Bro, let's go Wait till I get my end on some R. Kelly.

Let's do it. All right? Keep going. Start from the beginning. Let's start from the beginning. Let's do it. All right, we going for it. We running it back.

We running it back. All right, go. I really can't stay. But baby, it's cold outside. I've got to go away. But baby, it's cold outside. This evening has been Been hoping that you

Drop in No You just fucked it up Yeah that's not how it goes at all Yo I can't It's been hoping you drop in Oh let's see Yeah

Been hoping Wait how does it go It's the same cadence It's the same cadence You gotta hold up Alex you got the voice Go go Bitch ass

Go go go go go Wait go, go, go. Wait, he's done. No, you need a little giddy up. No, he's the girl. No, you ain't doing all that. You're doing that one line. Been hoping that you'd, been hoping you'd drop in. So very nice.

I'll hold your hands behind your back and tie them to the bed and then get what I want. I'll hold your hands. My mother and tie them to the bed get what I want a whole other will start to worry first of all how old is this bitch if her mom is wearing it? Maybe it's stat rape. Maybe it's this bitch's fucking Arya Stark out here. Like, yo, can I just go home? Yo, Stark had a body. Okay, stop it. Stop it.

You need to stop it. You're going to look 11. Who, Arya? Yeah. That's so funny. But she's 22, so it's whatever. It's funny. Beautiful, what's your hurry?

Hold on. Where am I? My father will be pacing the floor. My father will be pacing the floor. Listen to the fireplace roar. So really, I'd better scurry. Beautiful, please don't hurry. But maybe just a half drink more.

That's how you know she wants it. Put some rackets on while I pour. The neighbors might think. Baby, it's bad out there. Say what's in his drink? No carbs, babe. Say what's in his drink? No carbs had to be out there.

I wish I knew where I was right now. I wish I knew how I got here. Nah, this is where it gets ravey. When you ask about the drink and I'm just making other shit, like go, go, go, go, go, go, go. So what's it say? I wish I knew how. No, no, no.

Say what? Say what's in this drink. Hey, there's no cabs out there. You can't even get a cab out here these days. I wish I knew how I got here. Hey, your eyes, like starlight, like real talk, eyes are beautiful, man. This is when the roofies are kicking in. To break this spell, I mean.

Hey, I'll take a hat. Look at that. Look at that. Look at that. Look at that. Look at that. Who's wearing a hat inside? Next line.

I ought to say no, no, no. Oh, God. No. I ought to say no, no, no. Oh, God. You might as well move a little closer. No. At least I'm going to say that I tried. Hey. Why are you trying to hurt my pride? That's the line.

That's the off the hook line. Why are you trying to hurt my pride, though? I really can't stay. Oh, baby. Don't hold out. But, baby, it's cold outside. Son, this is a seren sorry. All right.

This is a seren. Whatever his name is it aziz okay ready here it is this is where it gets crazy go my sister will i simply must go look at your phone look at the fucking lyrics i'm looking at the movie it's from okay i simply must go But baby it's cold outside The answer is no No it ain't You're welcome husband

How lucky that you dropped in So nice and warm Like your pussy My sister will be suspicious She can get it too My brother will be there at the door. He can get it. My maiden aunt's mind is vicious.

Gosh, your lips look delicious. But maybe just a cigarette more. Never such a blizzard before. I've got to get home. But baby, you'd freeze out there. Say lend me a coat. It's up to your knees down there you've rarely been grand

I thrill when you touch my hand but don't you see how you gonna do this to me there's bound to be talk tomorrow I would have been nutted if you sucked my dick we're already here longer than we need to be at least there will be plenty implied.

I got pneumonia, bitch. That's a funny line. There'll be plenty implied. If you got pneumonia and died, yeah, you could go outside. You could even get raped or die. So, pick it to pick your poison. That's literally what he said.

That's a hell of a choice. How problematic. Jesus Christ. God damn, guys. Guys, listen, I gotta pee on that note. I gotta take a nice little pee-pee Really can't stay

The movie Oh, Jesus Christ Oh, my God Yo, the movie is called Neptune's Daughter That's what it's called You're still trying to be right You wrong

I'm right, bro It's that you're doing the motherfucking Google Of course you don't have facts out here The movie is called Neptune's Daughter. That's what it's called. You're still trying to be right. You're wrong. I'm right, bro. It's getting to the motherfucking Google. Of course you don't have facts out here. Neptune's Daughter. 1949. That's all came out in 1944. What does that mean?

You're wrong. No, that's the point they put in the movie. What? Yo, read this shit, though. First off, he has a whole, like, five-piece suit on. There's no way it's hot out. Nah, that's the point. It's justpiece suit on. There's no way it's hot out. There's no way it's hot out. Look at him.

That does not look playful at all. Just look at the screenshot. You can pull up the screenshot. Does that look playful to you? She's like, Jesus Christ, please get away. I said all left shit. Oh, my gosh. Yo, she's trying to get away.

Look. You don't even know how to play the... Yo, this's trying to get away. Look. You don't even know how to play the... Yo, this is wild. What does the opinion piece say? Why rewriting baby, it's cold outside. Jesus Christ. Yeah, there's no way we're reading all this. This is very fucking rapey. Yeah.

Whatever, bro. Listen, the point is it's not about rape. Did he clap? Huh? Did he end up clapping? You read the movie. Did he beat? No, I didn't watch. No, I read it it i saw like a thing about it like one of these little three minute videos i was like hey it was one it's from like a pretty liberal thing too it was like hey and i was half wrong in the meeting was him and his wife wrote it together at a party like

telling people it's time to leave just joking but they're him and his wife at a party it's not i'm raping this bitch but what if you're a rapist and you're like, finally, a song for me. That was fine now, but you can't sing that song today. The song was saying about leaving

a motherfucking party and it's not even her leaving. It's about everybody else leaving. My wife ain't got to leave our house. It's not about everybody else. They're fucking around a piano. That's what it said, right?

Oh, I see what you're saying. So they're singing the song together to the crowd to leave they're on the piano together fucking around we're just fucking around the piano but seriously leave God okay that makes sense so this thing it's so it wasn't it wasn't he wrote a song about trying to fuck a bitch that I was definitely half wrong I can see but they put it in the movie and in the movie

apparently it's like LA and it's like a three-minute thing on it I didn't care to do 100% accurate research but that's what I was saying okay it feels like if we wouldn't have gotten that with Landry by far the worst rendition of I've ever heard of that song Mac Miller and the Ariana Grande had a version of it it was kind of fire of fire. I don't care, though. Yeah, but that's not even all you. But I don't care about white people music. That's very true. To be honest, I would rather fuck it up and walk away.

I would feel better about myself if I fucked it up. If I got it right, I'd be like, God damn it. They're getting to me. That was in The Elf, though. That movie was a classic. Baby, it's cold outside. Let's think about this. Andrew can come into this conversation when he gets here.

I was thinking about the three most supportive friends I have in my life are Andrew and then two other white dudes. And I was like, yo, God won't let me have nothing, man. He won't let me hate nobody. I was like, I got to ease up on my white bitch hate. Otherwise, God knows where that's going to go. You know what I mean? God don't let you hate, man. That's why that Chris Rock joke, if you have gays, you're going to have a I mean? God don't let you hate, man That's why if you

That Chris Rock joke If you have gays You're gonna have a gay son God won't let you hate What if God loves you so much He like kills all the white White women in like Your white friend's life

He's like I did this for you He took you to a dark place, man I respect it I respect it But I don't know exactly How you got there

Let me let you talk it out No question God's will, bro Who am I to will, bro. Who am I to question, bro? I'm just like, no, I did this for you, my son. What do you mean? Alex, did you hate any groups of people? Did you hate white women before, and that's why you fucking so many of them now?

Nah. I don't hate any group of people. I grew up in New York. It's really hard to hate anyone. You grew up in motherfucking Far Rockaway. You're the last stop on the train. That ain't New York. Yeah, so I was like. If I can read your city anytime on the train, that shit is not New York.

I was ignorant, ignorant. And then once I left Far Rock then. I was really ignorant to like gay people growing up. Like I didn't like hate gay people. I just had like these preconceived notions about them. That was like really fucked up. You got from your parents who hate gay people? Nah, like from like TV and like rap music. Then you got from your uncle and aunt who hate gay people. I just had like these preconceived notions about them. That was like really fucked up. You got parents who hate gay people? Nah, like from like TV and like rap music.

Then you got like uncle and aunt who hate gay people? Nah. And like immigrants are, you know what I mean? Immigrants is immigrants. They just, I mean, my parents, well, my, like my uncles and parents didn't like, not like gay people. They were just like, oh, you're just. Yes. Yes. you just yes yes

I was hoping we got this oh boy what you gonna do hey guys I'm listen you would think I'll be embarrassed by this

no but I'm pretty proud of it to be honest with you that gift is gonna live forever that's me yeah you did oh you were here last episode

that's a sketch I did for all Def Digital called Supportive Stalker. That's bad. I don't even get how you make this funny. I'm telling this bitch it's cold outside and she's not listening. Stupid bitch, it's cold. You got to watch the skit. The skit's really funny. It's hilarious.

The skit is called Supportive Stalker. It's written by my homie Doughboy. Shouts to Doughboy. I'm trying to do a... You think we could play it on here? I'm sure they wouldn't give a fuck. I mean, Russell got bigger things to worry about than what we're playing on his YouTube. Russell Simmons got bigger fish to fry.

Oh, my God. It's just, I don't know if it's funny just audio, but I guess y'all could watch. It's four and a half minutes. You could at least watch a clip. We could watch. Let's watch the first little clip. You could watch the intro. Supportive Stalker is called.

It's a little awkward for me to watch my own shit. Well, we watched it. Here's the thing. It came up before we were taping last week and we just watched the whole sketch. And how bad is Google?

They don't even know to skip the YouTube ad, dog. It's crazy. And we were just laughing our ass off at the sketch before the... It's a white bitch answering her phone. Hello?

Why don't you want to talk to me? Who is this? Do you like scary movies? Oh, I should? Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, then you're missing all the jokes. What's the point of this? What are we watching?

We're watching a clip of his sketch. I didn't see this. They can't see it We can talk over it No but the audio is going to get Caught up on the video No we're talking over it It's not music

It will They just listen to it That's how it works Cut it off That's what I'm saying Fuck it Cut it off But yeah now we're talking about

You guys record it Just do it on the phone We were talking over it It doesn't matter The code Is it's own track so we'll find it this has happened like with will you put any TV show or any boxing that kind of shit catches it I'm completely fine with it I do think Russell had had bigger things

to worry about but yeah cut this off though check it out supportive stalker that's it all that digital no we'll tweet it out we'll see that I'll tweet it out tomorrow morning we can all watch it once this episode's out it's funny ass it's funny i respect it you've always hated white women though i respect it not always i think i hate hate them extra because i used to think they were cute back in high school when i grew up with them you know i used to be very whitewashed i used to be very like not proud of being indian i think that's why i overcompensate If we're being real about it I'm extremely honest about it

If we're being real about it That's probably why I overcompensate so hard now It's Malcolm bro Yeah it is Eventually you're gonna go To white Mecca And then you're gonna realize

That you know We're all the same And you know Well no I've done that With white dudes I haven't made it To that point With white women

Eventually Yeah yeah yeah Do you know what I mean Wasn't that the Malcolm thing Like Malcolm I was saying That's why you're Taking a shit Right I feel like God Doesn't let you hate that the Malcolm thing? I was saying this while you were taking a shit.

I feel like God doesn't let you hate people. And that's why I was saying my three most supportive friends are you and then Brian, who you know, and then Peter, who you know. Three white dudes. And I was like, God really was just like, hey, this whole hating white dudes thing is over. And I took it to a dark place with white women. Say again? And I took it to a dark place with white women and his God and stuff. So you need some white girlfriends Nah

We good Who's been the most supportive For you in your Entertainment career like executive wise You oh Marcy White lady oh shit Shout out to Marcy Phillips at ABC that's my fucking She's not going to be that supportive after this episode

You know the dopest thing About her I had a this old white girl to Marcy Phillips at ABC. That's my fucking love that girl. She's not going to be that supportive after this episode. You know what's the dopest thing about her? I had a, this old white girl. Yeah. Oh, like, I don't know, 60 something, I don't know. But we had a conversation.

I was like, yeah, I used to really hate white people. And we're just at lunch and she's like, yeah, I get it. But it wasn't like a guilty, it wasn't like a guilty, like, no, we've done a lot of terrible things. She's like,

she wasn't even like, I get it. She's like, okay, cool. And I was like, I don't anymore. She's like, yeah, people grow up. It makes sense. But it wasn't like, she dope. She likes Andrew a lot too. It's get it. She's like, okay, cool. And I was like, I don't anymore. She's like, yeah, people grow up. It makes sense. But it wasn't like, she dope. She dope. She likes Andrew a lot too.

It's good. It's very funny. It's good. She got good taste. Yeah. Yeah, man. Sorry, white people. It's tough for y'all.

I'm sure you'll power through white folks. Tough for y'all now. Through this tough time. I do empathize with white people, man. I empathize, not white like Europeans, but I empathize with white Americans that have no connection to their past. Oh, like poor white Americans, like trailer trash? Or just like wealthy white Americans that just like, there are white Americans that

like my dad's side, we're Irish and German, but like no connection to what it means to be Irish and German. Gotcha. Like I have an idea of Scottish because my mom's born and raised there. But like on my parents' side, it's like- No idea. No idea, right? So the only choice they got

is to be... Sidebar, that video of you and your mom dancing on Instagram. Oh, thank you, guys. Fucking adorable. That thirst trap, Alex called it out.

Fucking adorable. Alex was so jealous, yo. Exactly. It was a thirst trap move, but I was like, even I was like... This guy's a thirst trap god. All he does is post

fucking pull-up pictures. You see him with his dick out? It's been a while. It's been a while. fucking pull-up pictures. You see him with his dick out? It's been a while. It's been a while. Let's be fair to Alex. He's fucking playing with his dick before he gets on a pull-up bar. It's been a while, though.

Let's be fair to Alex. It's been a while. But I respect it, though, because there's different ways. Because dudes can't outwardly thirst trap like Alex can. Right. But the way you thirst trap is by doing little shit like this. Oh, he loves his mother. First of all, it's not a thirst trap. It's a thirst trap is by doing little shit like this. Oh, he loves his mother. It's not a thirst trap.

It's a thirst trap, bro. I was dancing with my mom. Look at the comments. And I had to film it and put it on Instagram. Yes. 100%. It's a thirst trap, though. 100%.

But it's like I had to show the world what a beautiful 71-year-old woman should do. And you know what? Maybe I did it on Easter Sunday when you're with your family and your head is in your phone and you're not taking advantage of that little time you have with your family. And maybe you watched it and maybe you went, you know what? My mom's right over there and I'm not giving any quality time to my mom. Maybe I should just go hang out with my mom. Your mom can't dance.

She got no rhythm. None of your moms do. Oh, personal. Personal. Personal. My mom will smoke your mom on't dance. She got no rhythm. None of your moms do. Oh, personal. Personal. Personal. Personal. My mom will smoke your mom on a dance floor. I don't know about that. My mom will smoke your mom on a dance floor, B.

Three-time U.S. Bomb Dance Champion. All your moms can get bodied. All your moms can get bodied. We can set it up. Anytime. We can set it up. Son, look at this girl with the moves right now. Listen, listen.

First off, all African parents dance at every party from at least 9 p.m. Hold up, hold up. From 9 p.m. to 5 a.m. That's what you're worried about. You're talking all this respect shit. It's Sandra Cameron

watching Mama Schultz on your IG. Nah, she's Schultz. She's just trying to get married. Yo, she's never made men. Nah, nah, you Schultz. I call her, she says her name's Sandra Cameron to people and I correct it.

I be like, nah, that's Sandra Schultz. You bought in. I call her Miss Cameron. You bought in. You can I'd be like, no, that's Sandra Schultz. You bought in. I thought I missed Cameron. You bought in. You can call her whatever you want, but that's Sandra Schultz. This is adorable, though. All things considered.

My heart warmed. It's cute. And I do think it's possible people looked at it and thought, you know what? I should get off my phone. It's Easter. I'm with my family. It's also possible. I think he also did it knowing a lot of girls would be like, Hasha, fuck this dude.

He's close to his mom. He can dance and he's white. That doesn't happen very often. These are things that women look at. They're like, oh my God, look at the beautiful relationship. Apparently, y'all know more about this shit than me. I don't know about this stuff. Y'all know more about this shit than me.

I was just having a beautiful moment with my mom, and I thought if I could put this positive energy out there in the world, other people could have beautiful moments with their moms. I hope that happened. If you look at a lot of comments, a lot of DMs, you know, besides the ones saying how- And the footwork's not bad either

on your part. And you can dance, dog. She's carrying you right now, but your footwork's not bad either. No, his parents used to have, when I lived with him, his parents used to have me fill in on dance classes sometimes.

He probably just grew up doing that. You just need people sometimes. Okay, sure. Beautiful. I'm the best dancer on this podcast. Nah, I'll tell you what's up. All right, here we's up What's up There's nothing gay about me being in a dance class

Except that I wanted to dance with dudes I was trying to hold it back Fucking It was just blowing Shit Anyway Yo but this is a good topic though Point is what

What's up Guy Thirst traps Guy thirst traps This Y'all be thirst trapped You know how you thirst trap? Baby pics with mom pics.

Greatness. This is how you thirst trap. That is true. Be great. That's the greatest thirst trap. Okay, but what are the cheap thirst traps? But not everybody's great, so people need to do shit like post. So if you're not great, you need to watch.

Okay? That's fine. You don't got thirst traps. But this is, look, you got to have these moments with your mom, bro. And then share them with other people. And then other people have the moments with your mom. That's what we got to do. Affect the ecosystem in a good way.

Okay, this isn't a thirst trap. But let's talk about actual thirst traps. You want to know how to thirst trap well. If you honestly tell me it's not a thirst trap, I'll believe you. I swear to God. Okay. My dad was the one that filmed it. This is me and my mom and my dad Before we went out to go eat

I said dad hold this I'm going to dance with mom And she didn't even know we were going to dance I cut the initial part of it off But you realize I never get to dance with my mom And my mom's probably secretly wanted me to dance with her For fucking my whole life

This is her greatness Man my heart is just swelling right now. You want to know some real shit, and I didn't include this, but this is the, she wouldn't do it because she's like, I don't have any makeup on.

I don't look pretty. I don't look pretty. Your mom's beautiful. She's beautiful. She is beautiful, man. If I really cared about thirst, that's the part I would put up. Me and my mom,

my dad, me and my dad going, you look beautiful, da, da, da, da, da. But I just wanted like, yo, man, I don't hang out with them. I'm trying to do Sundays with my parents. I'm trying to do every Sunday with my parents. That's great.

And it is cool. That's a hot idea. You know what? We should all do Sundays with our parents. Do Sundays with your parents, bro. Let's do that. Even if it's more for days. Let's make sure.

Let's start it on, make a hashtag, Flagler2. Family Sundays or something like that Barstool has Sundays For the boys Saturdays for the boys Flaygertoo will have Sundays for the moms Sundays for the moms

Or Sundays for the parents Or whatever Hey for real If you have someone Whose mom is 1500 miles away Do it Do it

If you can If you can be around it For me And this is And I don't have like The most incredible Relationship with my mom right but it is nice just being around the family energy i will be honest like little shit that

like little jokes my dad was making yeah my dad is just a straight old pervert now do you know what i mean does not give a fudge just straight sex jokes all day so but this right here it was maybe just trying to relate to you maybe that maybe that's true now i'm front who's the third strap that shit work or what hey we got that hey hey we got that how them likes how them views huh what you know i believe you when you said it was real though because you said you swear to God. I do swear to God. I swear to God

and we did cut the other part and I really thought that it might, there might be some other people with their family on Sunday and I was like, yo man, look at me having fun with my moms.

Y'all can have fun with your people. It's nice. It's a beautiful thing. It's very pure. Very pure. But we should do dance lessons with Sandra. We could have dance,

we could have Sandra teach us all some shit. there's also a point to that because i don't ever put up shit with my mom because i'm like nah i don't want to be phony but like always putting the asshole stuff up is phony you know what i mean you can put up some shit like that every once in a while and maybe affect the ecosystem to use your words that's it it's bigger than you i like to keep certain things to the chest like totally the girlfriend the family the mom girl here and there on the story girlfriend the family the mom girl on the story i see her all the time on the story when you guys go out to eat yeah here and there but you know i'm trying to shit to talk about so you just put the camera on her because that's the only time

she's happy only time she smiles when she's eating with me i'm like all right yeah now she's not allowed to eat again but yeah man it's you gotta do that shit i understand like for me there's a lot of things i don't include in my life yeah and in my like entertainment board there's a lot of my life that's separate you know but i think that we got a unique opportunity to like show some cool shit that makes people want to do some cool shit outside of just like jokes or just content for the parents man yo sundays are for the folks sundays are for the parents, man. Yo, Sundays are for the folks. Sundays are for the folks. Saturdays for the boys.

Sundays for the, shout out to Barstool, they started that shit. Yeah, Saturdays are for the boys. Sundays are for the folks, man. Sundays are for the folks or some shit. We gotta have some.

We'll figure it out. We'll figure it out. Yeah, it'll be good. But yo, dance lessons for real. My mom came in when I was in first grade and taught the class dance lessons.

Really? And the only way I agreed to have her do it is she would teach half ballroom, and then the other half she'd have to teach MC Hammer. So my mom came in. I would hate to monetize your mom, but I think that would be a great Patreon goal. She teaches a ballroom class for all the assholes, and it's free, whatever. I want her to teach MC Hammer teach us how to do that

can she still get that typewriter no she's nice bro I'm telling you that's it they go out dancing three times a week my folks

that's fire man I love it yeah my dad's knee is busted she's just wearing this guy down she's literally just grinding this guy down she's like Tom Thibodeau

yeah but that's her she's wearing wearing out all the players that She's like Tom Thibodeau. Yeah, but that's her. She's wearing out all the players. That's good. Fucking Tom Thibodeau. It's like 48 minutes a game, Derek. That's her humor, though. Like, I empathize. When someone loves something,

like we love jokes, I can always relate to it. So, like, imagine you got a girl hates your fucking jokes. You gonna still get them? Three days a week is joke night. You gonna get these jokes. How the fuck it wears you down? You gonna get these jokes, baby're going to still get them three days a week. It's joke night. You're going to get these jokes. I love it.

How the fuck is it where is you now? You're going to get these jokes, baby. You're getting it, girl. You're getting this work. Oh, hell yeah. Anyway, anything else

you want to cover, guys? The other two things I wrote down, you said something interesting about Patrick Beverly. I thought it was interesting. Which was that? I think it was

if Patrick Beverly had James Harden's game or vice versa, he would be Michael Jordan or something like that. There was something to that effect. Oh, if Patrick Beverly had James Harden's game or vice versa, he would be Michael Jordan or something like that. Oh, yes. I was trolling a little bit. I was trolling a little bit on Twitter. I got busy, but I wanted to do a thread of just absurd.

If you combine these two people, then they're this. So I started out with, what was it? Beverly and Harden yeah if James Harden had Patrick Beverly's heart he'd be Michael Jordan or Michael Jordan is just it was gonna be Michael Jordan is just but then I was gonna get like really absurd with that that was not awful that one was a close enough the thing was imagine the Williams gets all the hard and calls hard and gets the average 40 Michael Jordan was James Harvison okay but I think it would have been a really fun thing to get really all the Harden calls Harden gets the average 40. Michael Jordan was James Harden's best referee. Okay. I get that.

I think it would have been a really fun thing to get really absurd with it. Like Michael Jordan is just Danilo Gallinari but with blah blah blah's footwork. That's what they do on Twitter all the time. Anytime you have a shit game. I saw somebody tweet Russell Westbrook is just Johnny Flynn with anger issues.

After Like, I saw somebody tweet, Russell Westbrook is just Johnny Flynn with anger issues. Some shit. Like, after any bad game, like, you'll just see people just roast him and just be like, yo, LeBron James is just Lamar Odom without the crack or some shit like that. Like, just terrible. I'm not saying I've said it. I'm just saying these are things that I've seen. Well, you know, whatever. I might have lied. Last thing I want to talk about, if you want to get into it just saying these are things that I've seen. Whatever. Well, you know, whatever. I might have lied.

Last thing I want to talk about, if you want to get into it, is Crawford and Khan, the fight. Yeah. I didn't watch the fight. No, no, no, no. I shouldn't. You remember when I used to always troll people saying, I mean, Khan was the greatest fighter ever? Just because he was brown? He was brown.

Yeah, I did that. And the Indian guy, the Mavericks drafted. I did a thread of him, how good he was and stuff like that. That's so fun to do. But I didn't actually watch the fight. I knew he was going to lose. I don't know much, but I knew he was going to lose. Glass chin. Crawford is legit, man.

He's so fucking good. Yeah, man. Boxing's in an interesting place, man. It's like waiting for its next breakout star. Lomachenko just fought recently and he's just incredibly talented and there's a couple very interesting fights out there we're just kind of like waiting for it to happen this DAZN thing is shaking things

up because people don't know exactly where to watch the fights like the content is really tricky right now like the ESPN plus thing is making it hard for people to sign up so it's like how do I get this how do I get the people? What is happening? There's a lot of flux right now, and I think once

the dust settles, we're going to see some big stars pop up. I would love to see Lomachenko fight I don't know if it's possible for Lomachenko to fight Crawford. I don't think it is possible. I think Lomachenko's got to fight maybe like Mikey Garcia or something like that. But anyway, or there's a Floyd Mayweather fighter named Gervonta Davis.

On the money team, you mean? Yeah. Okay. And Gervonta Davis and Lomachenko. I heard of him. I actually see him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's dope.

Yeah, that would be a really cool fight, man. But yeah, boxing is in an interesting place. You know, there's a friend of the show gave me the manager of... Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then we're going to wrap up. You want to hold it? You got me.

So the manager of Lomachenko, he's also the manager of Crawford. I spoke to him. So I'm going to try to get Crawford on the podcast. And that'd be cool. Nice. Yeah, it'll be good stuff. Because he'd be. So I'm going to try to get Crawford on the podcast. And that'd be cool. Nice. Yeah, it'll be good stuff. Because he'd be an interesting guy to talk to.

There's a, yeah, he'd be an interesting guy to talk to, especially after Stylebender, you know, having being on here and just like really getting into like what it is to be a fighter. Yeah. Like for me, I'm just fascinated on what it is to be a fighter and like the. Yeah, be a coon. Is that how you said it?

Yeah, be a coon. Yeah, be a coon. Yeah, be a co biakun. Is that how you say it? Ia biakun. Ia biakun. Ia biakun. But anyway, man. Thank you all so much for listening, man. We got some dates coming up. I know that Alex and I are going to be in Austin for the Moon Tower Comedy Festival. You can go buy tickets.

I think my show is Friday night at like 9, 15 or some shit like that. I'll be doing a bunch of little shows around the festival. But if you just want to buy tickets to the headlining show, just go right ahead and buy that one. Then we're going to be in Dallas and then we're going to be in the weekend after. I'll be in Dallas May 3rd. Akash will be there for the May 3rd show. Then we're going to do

Dallas. Then we've got Nashville. Just go to theandrewstoles.com and get it. Then for the Toronto show, I think there's less than 30 tickets left, man. That's unbelievable, man. So get on that. If you want to be there that night, get on it.

New York going fast. Boston going fast. Chicago going fast. We just added another show for San Francisco. So there'll be a show the 8th and the 9th of June. So go to TheAndrewShows.com. We're coming to a lot of different cities. And we've got another cool announcement coming up in the next couple weeks. But, yeah, go to TheAndrewShows.com. We're coming to a lot of different cities, and we've got another cool announcement coming up in the next couple weeks.

But, yeah, go to TheAndrewShows.com right now. Gobble up those tickets. I'm telling you, man, get them before they're sold out. I see y'all wait, and then I see y'all upset when they sell out. So go get them now. May 27th, D'Ussé Palooza is coming back home to New York City in Brooklyn, the Brooklyn Mirage. We expect about 6,000 people

in that venue it's going to be insane May 27th at the Brooklyn Mirage and Philly May 31st we are hosting the official pre-party

for the Roots Picnic so come through get tickets for that at doomsaypalooza.com the Roots Picnic at Nanny ah god ooh that's so

unfortunately named right now but May 31st that's where we'll be at. But definitely hook up in New York for the Brooklyn Mirage. We're about to announce our headliner for the New York City date, and it's going to be a big one. So make sure you get those tickets now before we announce the guys, and they start selling the fuck out super fast.

Get that shit. Get to it. Caroline, this Friday, this Saturday, 7.30 p.m., you can get tickets on the Caroline that shit. Get to it. Caroline, this Friday, this Saturday, 7.30 p.m. You can get tickets on the Caroline's website, carolines.com

or at my website, akashsingh.com. 7.30 p.m. Two shows come through. Yes, sir. Guys, that's been another episode of Flagrant 2.

Thank y'all so much for listening. Peace. God bless.