Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - Jake Paul Calls McGregor's Wife a 4

Episode Date: December 15, 2020

This week Andrew, Akaash, AlexxMedia, Mark and Dov discuss Jake Paul's new beef, Jake Paul's racist knockout, why Lebron needs to stop whining, why Jay-Z isn't cool, Logan Paul's fight potential, and ...much more. INDULGE! Want an extra episode a week? Join the Flagrant Army www.Patreon.com/FLAGRANT2 Flagrant 2 is a comedy podcast that delivers unfiltered, unapologetic, and unruly hot takes directly to your dome piece. In an era dictated by political correctness, hosts Andrew Schulz and Akaash Singh, along with AlexxMedia and Mark Gagnon, could care less about sensitivities. If it’s funny and flagrant it flies. If you are sensitive this podcast is not for you. But if you miss the days of comedians actually being funny instead of preaching to a choir then welcome to The Flagrancy.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 What's up everybody, welcome to Flagrant 2 It's your boy Shultz, Akash Singh in the building, Alex Media, Mark Gagnon We even got the truffle himself, Dov Maman Let's begin, right before we started this episode I saw Jake Paul post something on Instagram He was speaking to Conor McGregor I saw Jake Paul post something on Instagram. He was speaking to Conor McGregor. And Conor McGregor is a little disrespectful.
Starting point is 00:00:34 Like he's disrespectful with fighters. You know what I mean? That's his thing. That is his thing, I guess. The fuck you suit, right? Didn't he have a suit that said fuck you? That's right. In the pinstripes. It said fuck you.
Starting point is 00:00:41 And Jake Paul has this. Is this the Irish cut? Conor McGregor, I know you're probably beating up old dudes in a bar right now. pinstripes and said, fuck you. And Jake Paul has this this this. I know you're probably beating up old dudes in a bar right now, or maybe you're jacking off because you're sick of fucking your wife. I mean, she's a four-count. You could do a lot better. Wow. Whoa. Bro.
Starting point is 00:01:02 Saying his wife is a four? Whoa. That's wild, bro. That's OD. He crossed the line with that one. That's wild. All right, here's why it's wild.
Starting point is 00:01:14 Jake. You say why it's wild, then I'll say why it's not wild. Go ahead. Okay. So Jake has probably, Jake could probably beat up most people, right? And especially now after the Nate Robinson fight, it's been obvious.
Starting point is 00:01:30 Most people are like, all right, that guy could probably beat me up if we were to fight. Right? But, he can't beat up Conor. He might be able to outbox Conor, but he's not going to be able to beat up Conor.
Starting point is 00:01:42 Like, Conor would fuck his ass up in a regular fight. This is a boxing match, right? Yeah, he's not going to be able to beat up Conor. Conor would fuck his ass up in a regular fight. This is a boxing match, right? He's asking him to, but I'm saying in the street, like in the street after what he did to Nate Robinson, most dudes are not checking Jake Paul. The average person is like, I don't want that smoke.
Starting point is 00:01:58 That's too much. I've seen him sleep a dude. I don't want that. Conor will fuck him up in real life. You call someone's wife a four Yeah The mother of your kids Still with her Yo
Starting point is 00:02:11 You gotta fuck him up You have to You have to fuck somebody up That's wild dog And he's offering you Fifty million dollars To fuck him up Yeah
Starting point is 00:02:22 He's saying Fuck me up And you get paid $50 million. You get to avenge the disrespect that was done to your wife and the mother of your kids and you get $50 million? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:33 You want to get permanent damage when you fight Dustin Poirier? You could get permanent damage. That's a bad motherfucker, Dustin Poirier. For way less money or $50 million a chance that's a bad motherfucker doesn't pour you for way less money or 50 million dollars to beat up some snot nose fuck from the disney channel come on is this a no-brainer bro he gotta take it that is the offer for real for real yeah and he put in the thing the contract and i
Starting point is 00:02:59 guess like proof of funds or some shit i don't know It's like a swipe over. First of all, well done, Jake. Brilliant move. Brilliant move. Son. I don't know if that. Yo. Bill Gates, your wife's a bitch. Real talk. 300 mil. Here's the thing with Bill Gates, though.
Starting point is 00:03:19 Bill Gates' reputation is not based on fucking people up. It's not even close to based on. You could say that. That's why I picked him. 100%. But Conor does it for a living. Why would you not take that fight if you're Conor?
Starting point is 00:03:36 Yeah, I think Conor would outbox Jake too. That's the thing. I think he would too. He's got a boxing background, right? It's, I believe, karate and kickboxing. Okay, fair. But still, it's like... I do remember kickboxing okay fair but still it's different i remember you saying when he boxed floyd his head movement was like spectacular his head movement was elite uh he is a quality fighter he's much shorter than jake and weighs much less than jake but at the same time we're talking about like a professional fighter like jake just started fighting yeah i don't know man
Starting point is 00:04:05 like i i just can't believe it that's a wild thing to say bro can i tell you why it's not that wild okay now you can tell me why it's not do you remember what connor said about khabib's wife yeah do you remember the exact words he said he was showing a picture of khabib's wife and she was completely covered for their wedding and he goes your wife's a towel mate and then you said she's not not a towel which was a great line because we all felt that way at the moment. I don't think that that is close to as disrespectful. Like if you called my wife a towel because she was dressed like a towel, I wouldn't feel as disrespected because underneath the towel, she's a beautiful woman that you love more than anything. If anything, that's disrespect to your religion.
Starting point is 00:04:49 And God's going beautiful woman that you love more than anything right if anything that's disrespect to your religion yeah yeah that's it yeah and god's gonna handle that now you cross pollinating my god and my wife you get fucked up but here's the thing you're not disrespecting a wife you're disrespecting god what god told your wife to wear yeah god gonna handle that god also made Connor's wife, right? So, you know, looking according to how Jake says, that's also on God. That's crazy disrespectful. God got your back about the towel comment. Connor tries to go to heaven, and if Muslims are right, God's going to be like, what was that towel shit handled? Yeah, okay.
Starting point is 00:05:20 You know what I mean? Fair enough. You soaking wet now, motherfucker. You don't need a towel in hell. You sweating your ass off wet now motherfucker you know what's crazy about these challenges now is that who said you could talk give the truffle his take so this is my take so with with ufc fighters and boxers they always have like promoters that get to like you know you make a challenge but the promoter creates the fight but because the paul brothers jake and lo, come from the digital world, they know the numbers that they can get. So they can make these challenges and say, like, I'm challenging you plus $50 million guaranteed on the table proof of funds like he's doing.
Starting point is 00:05:56 And he knows that he can get that money raised because of the world that they live in. That's a cool extra little skill you get. It's going to completely change. that's that's a cool extra little skill you get to completely change what's interesting is is going to change fight sports but the genius of dana white is that he kind of and it's kind of i guess what's fucked up but it's also the genius like he has all these guys under contract and they will have to fight for that contract in amount and it works because he fights them a lot so they get to fight way more than the average person would. But he can control that gate way better than the average promoter can. You know, like the promoters for boxing no longer have control of their fighters.
Starting point is 00:06:31 I think Canelo actually broke his contract. You remember he signed that crazy contract? And I think he recently just got out of it. Oh, shit. I think. Don't quote me. I just can't believe that. That's wild.
Starting point is 00:06:41 You got to see that, man. Yo. Like, you got to see that, man. Bruh. Oh, you got gotta call your wife a four you do we know with mma fighters it's the same as like with boxers like they're enforced no no like their hands are considered weapons so if a boxer hits a regular civilian that's like a felony or some short that That's interesting. I wonder if that is the case. Because Connor should just see him on the street for that. Yeah, but you don't get 50 million for that.
Starting point is 00:07:11 So? That's actually more honorable. It's not. It is. Making 50 mil defending your wife? That shit is honorable. What if Connor comes back and just says, yo, let's go on the octagon?
Starting point is 00:07:24 Connor got to fuck his girl. Conor got to fuck Jake Paul's girl. Jake Paul is that girl. That's how you honor your wife. His wife taking a video of it like, world star. She's rocking out. I mean, Conor could say come in the ring, but then Conor looks pussy. He looks pussy.
Starting point is 00:07:43 I think Conor looks pussy because the idea is that Jake Paul isn't an actual person in fight sports. He's not an actual professional fighter, and Connor is. Connor was so cocky about his boxing, he boxed the greatest boxer ever. Now this Disney star is saying, I will fuck you up in a boxing ring, and if you're not for 50 million dollars guaranteed and if you're not willing to take that 50 million you're crazy yeah his fight purse for uh floyd was 30 or that's the uh that was the guarantee was the guarantee he walked away with 130 million some people say the guarantee was 30 yeah i'm just saying they all knew they were gonna make
Starting point is 00:08:23 100 off that but i'm just saying yeah how knew they were gonna make 100 off that but i'm just saying yeah how do you not take that now if i'm connor what how i played is this i go i ignore and let him build the fight keep getting more disrespectful keep getting more wild the same way floyd did to connor connor been calling out floyd forever right floyd never said nothing until he got to a fever pitch and then it was like all right let's go boy no i'll whoop your ass i'm not gonna whoop your ass for no money let you build this but i would honestly let him fight one more time get another impressive knockout i think he needs one more if he fights again and it's a reasonably famous person and he sleeps him like he slept nate robb who gonna fight him again imagine he fought antonio brown and he slept him imagine he fights
Starting point is 00:09:05 to and he slept him imagine he fights rob gronkowski and he sleeps him i'm not saying that's necessarily gonna happen but imagine if that did happen yeah it'd be yeah inexcusable you got to do something first of all his his stock yeah through the roof through the roof yeah and connor gotta see that man just knocking out NFL players, calling people's wives a four. What is he thinking when he's doing this? Is he thinking this is a payday? Because you could fight other people, Jake. Nah, he wants to play.
Starting point is 00:09:35 They're super smart of him. Yeah, they want to fucking play. You say something that now Conor's going to look pussy if you don't take the fight? Nah, nah. That's the smartest play. Is it because that's the biggest payday is Conor? I'm saying, why Conor? Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:47 It's a huge payday. Biggest payday in sports. There's no boxer. First of all, he can't fight a real boxer because real boxers are going to bust his ass. And real boxers don't have personalities now that Floyd is gone. Yeah. Yeah, they're struggling big time. So it's like there's nobody he can fight as a boxer, right?
Starting point is 00:10:01 Fair. And MMA fighters are superstars right now i mean the biggest ones and connor is a fucking superstar yeah i think connor's still the biggest gate yeah you know all right fair enough that's the move then i think stylebender would bring in more stylebender would demoralize jake paul no i know that I just mean like it would be a more exciting card to see. Because then you could bring the race aspect into it. The pre-fight hype will be fun. Pre-fight hype.
Starting point is 00:10:31 It's going to be a trick to do the race thing with Jake because like he's so influenced by black culture. Yeah. Like Logan looks more like traditional white boy. Yeah. But like Jake is trying to rap. You know what I mean? I think he probably got a grill on in some of his pictures like he clearly is like not against black people and anyway besides when he's
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Starting point is 00:12:47 Son, no, I don't. I don't know her. I don't know. He just said Apple commercial. It was a popular commercial. Anyway, she accused our boy, SLB, Shia LaBeouf, as he calls him. I mean, not our boy. He was my boy back in the day.
Starting point is 00:13:02 Back in the day, all right. But now he's out here Wilding out Sam Witwicky Motherfucking Transformers Yo Yeah he killed that Transformers Back in the day
Starting point is 00:13:10 Yeah Back in the day He was the guy Put some respect On my man bro So what happened What happened So La Bouffe
Starting point is 00:13:17 Was out there Just fucking She said he was Abusive toward her I think there was Something like What type of abuse Here because
Starting point is 00:13:24 Oh my god Nah This is important Because now like... What type of abuse here? Because... Oh, my God. No, this is important because now there's different types of abuse. You can be emotionally... Aboof. Aboof. There's different types of Aboof. There's different types of Aboof.
Starting point is 00:13:33 That's what he does. It's Shia Aboof. It's an Aboof of religion. No, but is it emotional abuse? Let's talk about emotional, but what's emotional abuse? You know what I mean? When your girl's upset
Starting point is 00:13:44 that you're never home all the time, is that emotional abuse to me? Am I emotionally abused? Is it like when you're working on a Netflix special and you got to be gone a lot? Is that what it is? Oh, also, shout out to that. Make sure y'all watch that on Thursday and add it to your watch list if you haven't heard just yet. If you're a brand new listener to the Flagrant 2 podcast, make sure you do that so we can
Starting point is 00:14:02 break some goddamn records. Out this bitch. Out this bitch out this bitch now back to this shia speaking of bitches men who hit women yeah good say so apparently he was abusive we gotta physically abusive physically no they accuse of all three so it was well shit yeah you're gonna do the other ones you don't start it physical you don't go no honestly emotionally it was great but every time give me a people's elbow every thursday that's not how it works i'm just saying what is i need
Starting point is 00:14:37 to know exactly what's going on here because because it's not only fk twigs nata's saying see ya yeah but see i just jumped it, and she only claims emotional abuse. Now you're going to claim that after he made that video pop. He made a video pop? Remember when he made that music video pop? That was about six years ago. I'm just saying. Now when you're not making your music videos pop, all of a sudden, it's emotional abuse, right?
Starting point is 00:15:04 Come on, yo. Oh, don't tell me that's why I see you always covering her face. No! This guy's crazy. Oh, my God, the Transform Her. Yo, they got Shia LaBeouf out here transforming them, bro. Oh, my God. No!
Starting point is 00:15:20 Ain't it crazy? Shia LaBeouf and then Chris Brown had a song called what? Oh, my God, bro. I used to do a joke about that. Yo, Transformers, that's the fucking Kardashian curse. ain't it crazy Shia LaBeouf and then Chris Brown had a song called what oh my god bro I used to do a joke about that yo Transformers
Starting point is 00:15:28 that's the fucking Kardashian curse right there anything with Transformers that's a problem damn son so really so singer Sia reveals
Starting point is 00:15:35 that she was in an abusive relationship with Shia LaBeouf after FKA Twigs came out and said the same thing what was the Twigs one I've read this in
Starting point is 00:15:46 then i forgot something it was like in a car he like physically abused her in a car did you look this up at all dove because you're looking like you're searching your memory banks and i would actually rather you just look at the google uh let's see what that part well there was one scene where like he he you know he is very much like a method actor and she said that he said like you la fuck this yeah there was this one abuse scene there's one abuse scene where he gets in the character and said he's never killed something so he like starts shooting at stray dogs on the road with her in the car yeah something like that no one wants to see any dogs get killed but actual's what I don't know. They're actual real dogs, though? Yeah, real dogs. Yeah, dog. They weren't fucking robots. Fucking animal.
Starting point is 00:16:27 Megatron. That's wild. This guy's a fucking animal, bro. Yo. Who shoots an innocent dog? I don't get it. Yo, fuck Shia LaBeouf. Yo, fuck Shia LaBeouf, bro.
Starting point is 00:16:40 Yo. Honestly, Mark Wahlberg is way better in Transformers, dude. That's true. I was so happy Not to see LaBouf In a Transformers I can't believe it dude
Starting point is 00:16:49 This is disgusting Any others? Shooting at stray dogs Is crazy Yeah this guy's really Going through it How do you know They're strays?
Starting point is 00:16:58 Yeah they could've been Someone's dog Yeah That's runaway dogs Right You can't shoot At stray humans We should call
Starting point is 00:17:03 Homeless people that Should we call should we call those people strays yeah that's just feral steve that's all that is he's a rescue that's all but they're not rescued oops anyway what else we got going on that's just that was just too crazy i don't know the whole details obviously you got to hear both sides you know what i mean we need to hear what shy i gotta say about all this but that motherfucker is a wild ass boy bro that's crazy dog that's you know what the problem with being crazy is like leaning into the crazy guy because i don't think he was this early in his career he was doing disney movies even stevens bro
Starting point is 00:17:43 literally like a is that a movie he was in that was the disney show he was on think he was this early in his career. He was doing Disney movies. He was even Stevens, bro. Literally like a, is that a movie he was in? That was the Disney show. He was on even, he was normal, right? As a kid, he was like a normal kid, right? The problem with leaning into crazy guy is the good thing is you can do anything and people go, oh, he's an artist. You know what I mean? Like Johnny Depp can just be a fucking weirdo and people are like, oh, I know.
Starting point is 00:18:01 It's so Johnny Depp. And I think oftentimes people who have like a lot of social anxiety lean into this I'm a weirdo character because it allows them to get away with all these socially awkward moments, right? The problem with leaning into weirdo guy is when you get accused of some wild shit, mad believable. Everybody believes him.
Starting point is 00:18:20 No question. He also, he came out with a movie about his, about his childhood, where he played his own dad. Honey Badger? Honey Boy. Honey Bun. Honey Boy. Honey Boy. Honey Boy.
Starting point is 00:18:31 And his dad was, like, also really abusive, like, took all of his money, kept him in, like, a fucking motel while he's filming a Disney show. Like, he went through a shitty childhood. And then the whole point of the movie is like he's he's there. He's therapy in his way out of it. And then you see these interviews and you're like, oh, man, I really grew up. And then you read this article. It's like, yo, this guy's been crazier than ever.
Starting point is 00:18:53 I don't know. I hate you. Roll your eyes. But I will say, I think on the average, a Disney Channel kid has a worse life than like an average American kid. No, no way. No. Why? First of all,
Starting point is 00:19:05 if you're on TV and you're a kid, you never experience like being uncomfortable with girls. If you were a famous kid, you never go through do girls like me? Do they not?
Starting point is 00:19:15 Blah, blah, blah. Like you're going to be popular with chicks the second that show comes out through your 20s. I remember when I was in college,
Starting point is 00:19:22 there was a motherfucker. What was that kid's name? Johnny Tsunami. Johnny Tsunami. Y' What was that kid's name? Johnny Tsunami. Johnny Tsunami. Y'all went to college for Johnny Tsunami? Bitches was talking about Johnny Tsunami. Who the fuck Johnny Tsunami, bro? These bitches was talking about Johnny Tsunami.
Starting point is 00:19:36 Oh, my God. I saw Johnny Tsunami at the frat party last night. Johnny Tsunami was there. Johnny Tsunami. Johnny Tsunami. You was hating, son. Bro, I was not hating. I'm just saying.
Starting point is 00:19:48 No, Johnny Tsunami. I'm not hating, bro. Whatever. I was here to talk about Johnny Tsunami this, Johnny Tsunami that. What about Andrew Monsoon? That's it. Come on. You really surf, too.
Starting point is 00:20:00 That must have pissed you off. Yeah, motherfucker is a fake surfer. He's just Hawaiian looking. Yeah. How did he get the name, though? Say what? How did he get the name? Because he had bitches on that whack.
Starting point is 00:20:09 No, the movie that he did for Disney Channel was called Johnny Tsunami. His name is Brandon, I think. But he just... Bro, I don't know, but these girls was going for it. You can really tell Andrew's priorities in life. Because I was like, yo, these digital stars, they lose their money, they get sexually abused. And he's like, yeah, but they fuck. Yeah, they get bitches, yo.
Starting point is 00:20:27 They don't get rejected. So Akash's whole personality is built off of not getting that pussy in high school? You don't think that he would have been a way better guy
Starting point is 00:20:34 if he was on the Johnny... Mudslide? I'm just saying, people underestimate one you don't have any financial problems with your family his dad took all his money
Starting point is 00:20:51 that's your dad he blew that shit on it's your dad blew that shit on alcohol and drugs or whatever we don't know what he blew it on bro we don't know that
Starting point is 00:20:58 he didn't blow enough of it where you were homeless you had a home you had a motel yeah it was a roof yeah you weren't straight you weren home. You had a motel. It was a roof. Yeah, you weren't stray. You weren't stray, bro. And also motel, you're an actor. You're staying in hotels all the
Starting point is 00:21:10 time. Cry, baby. I wish you could show people the apartment where you grew up. My shit was fire. I mean, it's fucking crazy. Fire. If I told you who lived in that building, you'd be like, get the fuck out of here. But also, they lived there after your point. We was there first.
Starting point is 00:21:25 There was a basketball court in the middle of the place. Yep, we had a basketball court. But say where it was. But say what the story of this place was. This was my parents' place. He doesn't even move. Lob him up. I thought the video paused for me.
Starting point is 00:21:42 I don't give a shit about that, yo. Yo, but say what it was. It was my parents' old business that made so much money they moved to a better location and then instead of selling this,
Starting point is 00:21:52 we were like, let's just live in it. Exactly. Tell your parents to work harder. Like, you know what I mean? Like, my parents care about me
Starting point is 00:21:59 and they want us to have food and a basketball court. You had a better childhood than Shia LaBeouf. I don't know. We don't know that. Some of us was working for a posse at a basketball court. You had a better childhood than Shia LaBeouf. I don't know. We don't know that. Some of us was working
Starting point is 00:22:07 for Pussy at a young age. Okay? They called him the Honey Badger. What is the name of it? The Honey Boy. The Honey Boy. Pussy was thinking of him.
Starting point is 00:22:16 Honey Badger is so funny. The free safety for the Arizona Cardinals. The free safety, bro. All I'm trying to say is, you know what I mean i gotta get an apartment bro it was so fire you've been to his he's been his yeah yeah yeah that shit is so fired up well then they cut it in half but to then to you could then live in andrew's like post-college apartment
Starting point is 00:22:37 and then when you go see his parents apartment into three apartments yo you had to walk through the the lion the witch in the wardrobe to go through it and you had to walk through the the lion the witch in the wardrobe to go through it and you had to go through a closet and then you could then end up in his parents place and we're like andrew we are 25 years old now son this is what happens when you deserve everything You know what I'm saying? Tell your parents to work hard, bro. My shit was no different than a motel. It was no different than a motel, okay? It was what it was. My parents worked hard, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:23:14 They put everything they ever gained in their entire lives into a business selling dance lessons. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Salsa, swing. No, nobody's disrespected. Nobody inherited any money. Well, maybe a little forpected. Nobody inherited any money. Well, maybe a little for the down payment of the place. You know what I'm saying?
Starting point is 00:23:31 You know what I'm saying? It was salsa. It was merengue. It was tango. Hard work, yo. Hard work. It was hard work. I never disrespect your parents, but I'm saying you had a pretty good childhood relative to Shia LaBeouf.
Starting point is 00:23:40 Son. Just because you had to work a little bit. You know how you didn't have to work for pussy? Tell a girl your address. There ain't no more working for pussy. Hey, you know what? You kind of right. You know what I'm talking about.
Starting point is 00:23:51 My address is sick. You see the artwork? Just take 10 steps from there. But you don't know how convenient the hotel location was that Shia LaBeouf was in. Also, the guy was- Whatever it was. Holiday Inn. We singing Chingy?
Starting point is 00:24:06 What are we doing out here, bro? But point is, you don't know what his life was like. He's just playing victim, bro. Come on now. He's just victiming it up. That guy could have way better life than me. The guy's making tons of money making Disney movies all the time. My parents were selling merengues.
Starting point is 00:24:21 The only gays you could sell. I'm just saying. on guys come on guys come on everybody else is playing out being a victim that's say what i think he's being a victim that being said my life was better than him i mean if we getting competitive Mr. Labouf My life was definitely better My parents were definitely better You said that with the same level Of like certainty That you earlier said He had a better childhood
Starting point is 00:24:52 Than all of us Same level of confidence As if you never switched positions Son My man didn't have to do No homework son Think about when you're a kid When you're a kid
Starting point is 00:25:02 You don't know about bills You don't know about responsibilities You just know about homework. You don't got to do no homework. That's a better childhood. None. You know how stressful that shit was? You didn't do your homework.
Starting point is 00:25:13 You're on your way to school trying to do it on a subway. Person next to you bumping your elbow while you're trying to fill out your fucking, you know, algebras. You know? That shit is stressful. He didn't have none of that stress. No, none of it. The guy's life was way better than mine, even though it wasn't. His mom was better than his because he didn't fully appreciate how his was better than mine.
Starting point is 00:25:34 Bro, your idea of what a kid wants in his life is just like a fucking 90s movie of what a kid envisions. He's a blank check. Yeah, I know. Literally, that's what I was thinking of. Blank check. Exactly. And with that blank check, what did he do? Homework? Go-k do homework go-karts
Starting point is 00:25:47 go-karts oh you're right the guy could probably do go-karts all the time you know what he couldn't do with that blank check what's that buy your apartment
Starting point is 00:25:53 that's a fact that's a fact that's a fact you couldn't you gotta get richer so you could afford that place you know what the
Starting point is 00:26:02 sad shit is I was thinking I was like man maybe I is? I was thinking, I was like, man, maybe I should just buy my parents shit. Don't do that to them. I was like, maybe I'll buy my parents shit, just let them live in it. You know what I mean? And have tons of money.
Starting point is 00:26:17 So they can just do whatever they want for the rest of their life. That's sweet. Yeah, that's a good idea. Yeah, but that shit is mad expensive yeah I was gonna say a Florida condo and then you take it
Starting point is 00:26:29 I was like get a reverse mortgage mom figure your shit out you know you be thinking you could pay off your parents shit and then you
Starting point is 00:26:35 you look at the finances and you're like how about you just give me the phone bill and I'll take care of it bro you know what's crazy though they paid theirs off dude
Starting point is 00:26:41 you know it is what it is guys suck it Shia there it, Shia. There it is, Shia. You can't pay off a motel, you fucking... We can say it about a guy who hits women. That's what we should call guys who hit women.
Starting point is 00:26:55 Yo. That's facts. I'm not going to say it. You're not going to. You got a Netflix special. Until after Thursday. Then your boy is going to release one in all capitals. Come 2021, your boy's back.
Starting point is 00:27:09 Some merengues, Fonda? We got to call them merengues from now on. Dude. Okay, I'm just saying, we can't start feeling bad for these child stars. They didn't have no homework, and they had craft services. Also go-karts, but think about craft services. what was the most important shit no no no what was the most important shit no no think now i'm getting on your level right now what was the most important shit at lunch what was the most important shit at lunch you're really trying to appeal to a former
Starting point is 00:27:38 that's what i'm saying at lunch you come through what was your snacks at lunch what was your snacks desserts what type of dessert you snacks? Desserts. What type of dessert? Gushers. You had gushers. Cosmic brownies. You have brownies. You have pudding. I ain't got no pudding. You don't have any pudding?
Starting point is 00:27:51 Cosmic brownies, my shit. Yep. What is that? Cosmic brownies. Cosmic brownies? Cosmic brownies with a little like- Any little Debbie snack cake. That white bitch is all right with me.
Starting point is 00:27:58 That white bitch is all right with me too, bitch. Oh, the Swiss rolls, bro? Come on now. A honey bun or two? Is that the movie he was in A honey bun That's the Jameel Hibbert dessert Shout out to J-Hib
Starting point is 00:28:08 J-Hib could not walk By this one bodega Or any bodega For that matter Without going in And getting a goddamn honey bun He's addicted to that shit Point is
Starting point is 00:28:16 At craft services We didn't have to do that We had maybe one snack That we could go to school with And then we would try to Flip and flop And try to hustle Try to you know Do what we could do To get a and then we would try to flip and flop and try to hustle, try to do what we could do
Starting point is 00:28:26 to get a good snack for lunch. Shit. I remember a motherfucker came with an apple once. Idiot. Trying to trade an apple for some snack. From Sour Belts for an apple? Come on, bro. Come on, bro. Paper bag
Starting point is 00:28:41 Sour Belts? This fucking merengue walking around with an apple you know what i mean all i'm saying is that was a huge source of anxiety for a child you had to hustle you had to hustle and you were judged yeah you know what i mean so he never had to go through that he had craft services for anybody who's never been on a movie you probably could have filled up your walk-in closet with a lot of dessert though let me see if i had a walk-in closet i did i had my own walk-in closet and i'd be walking in that
Starting point is 00:29:16 shit bro i'll be honest with you you need to walk in yo this is how much walking you could lay in that bitch hey bro jameel smashed a friend of mine on that walk-in closet once. You turned it into a room. You turned it into a room. That's what we do over here, baby. My parents loved me. It's that simple. One thing Shia never mentions is how fun it is to live in a motel.
Starting point is 00:29:37 Tell us why. You never seen Suite Life of Zack and Cody? No, I haven't. Well, you get to roll around on the bellhop carts for fun. Now they don't have bellhop carts for motels, Mark. I've never been in a motel. I know you haven't. My parents love me. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:29:49 Hey, Shia, you sound like a real bitch right now, honestly. Poor ass Shia. For real, dude. It's just shocking to me that we could feel bad for it. Can we name any other problems as a kid? Name a problem as a kid. Your parents fighting. Was his mom around?
Starting point is 00:30:03 Nope. No. Problem solved. That's problem as a kid. Your parents fighting. Was his mom around? Nope. No. Problem solved. That's a good ass point. Problem solved. That's a good ass point you got there. Think about it. Going to bed at any hour you want. You have a bedtime as a kid, do you not? I did.
Starting point is 00:30:18 That shit was a little restrictive, to be honest. It was restrictive. I felt confined by my bedtime. Okay. Do you think I had a bedtime? 9.30, confined by my bedtime. Okay. Do you think Shia had a bedtime? Hey, 930, that motherfucker getting ready for Leno. You know what? You are damn right about that. He might stay up for Conan. He might stay up.
Starting point is 00:30:32 Something I hate is I got TV privileges turned off at a certain time. Was that at birth? Yeah. Because Mark hasn't seen any movies in his entire life. Yeah. That's a wild thing. Before. Yeah, but i've watched all
Starting point is 00:30:45 even stevens so you don't even know who shia labouf is outside of even stevens well he knows tv he does know tv what time was tv off i was like 10 o'clock 10 o'clock that's reasonable hours shia labouf got to make tv shia labouf got to make tv and he got to be literally he was probably up until 12 o'clock sometimes. Mm-hmm. As a kid. Midnight. He saw midnight.
Starting point is 00:31:08 He saw midnight. No kids saw midnight. No kids bullied him, right? He had security. He had security. Oh, wow. He had security. No bullies.
Starting point is 00:31:18 No bullies. Also, he's a child star. So that means he's only around other child stars. You think they picked the ugly ass little kids to be child stars you back the bitches right now yeah yeah okay let's go actually no other shit there was there was that one kid from even stevens beans remember that kid okay no he was retarded yo that little kid was retarded straight up that's why he called him beans i thought that was right look up beans even steven he was his child actor on even stevens that was Look up Beans Even Stevens Tell me he ain't retarded Tell me he ain't retarded
Starting point is 00:31:46 Look me in my eyes tell me he ain't retarded And they called him Beans that was wildly offensive Yeah he might be a little bit Yeah he's vaccine injured for sure But he Oh we gotta get that vaccine by the way He was a weird looking kid And then he grew up and now he just still looks
Starting point is 00:32:02 Just like him but weird Go to that top right one Where his bald on the top And then he grew up and now he just still looks fucking... Just like him, but weird. Weird. It looks like the Grinch. Yeah, yo. Go to that top right one where he's bald on the top. So that's to your point. Do they ever have ugly child actors? The answer is yes. Hey, yo.
Starting point is 00:32:12 Yes. Yeah, that's a wild boy right there. My man got extra chromosomes for sure. Beans from Even Stevens works as a Santa's helper at the mall. That's disrespectful when they like... That's fucked up. You can't have a regular job after being a child actor. You got no education, son.
Starting point is 00:32:28 You fucking, you gave it all up, bro. You fucked your whole argument with that one. You took the queen's gambit and you lost that bitch. Yo, does that bitch ever end up winning in that shit? I didn't watch a single episode. God damn. I watched the first one. I want to get back in the kitchen.
Starting point is 00:32:43 That's funny. I tried to convince me that shit was good. I didn't know. You didn't know that's what we do. We start and shit. Like, yo, there's fire. You let someone else finish it. If it's hot, you go and get it. That's how we work. I didn't watch a single episode. Fuck that. Yeah, I watched the one
Starting point is 00:32:57 and I was like, alright. Watch the notes up there, B, because you see the notes and they read the notes. Oh, yeah. I put it where it's at oh you can't see it? 100% even though you zoomed out? okay good I'll be writing crazy shit up there
Starting point is 00:33:11 Patreon level notes alright guys let's take a break real quick let me tell you something I have not been sleeping great lately why? I don't know maybe I'm a little stressed because I gave my best friend... Sorry, do that again. All right, guys, let's take a break real quick. Yes, I'm gonna be honest with you. I have not been sleeping great recently. Had a little bit of insomnia. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because I gave my best friends corona before they were shooting a Netflix special.
Starting point is 00:33:40 I don't know. Somehow, I've just been exceedingly stressed out, and I haven't gotten great sleep, but that's about to change. Why? Because I'm going to download the Calm app. One of the most powerful, healthy things you can do is improve your sleep's why we're excited we have partnered with Calm. It is an app that is designed to help you calm down, get better stress, ease your anxiety levels. If you don't trust us, trust LeBron. He'd be talking about it too. Calm has a whole library of programs designed for healthy sleep. It has soundscapes, guided meditations, over a hundred sleep stories
Starting point is 00:34:21 narrated by soothing voices like Stephen Fry, Kelly Rowland, Laura Dern, all actors, famous people that'll help you sleep. 85 million people around the world are already using Calm. You should be one of them. So go to Calm.com slash flagrant and get this. You will get 40% off of a Calm premium subscription. That's a fantastic discount.
Starting point is 00:34:40 From me, I'm telling you right now, you know I'm about saving money. That's an amazing discount so go to calm c-a-l-m dot c-o-m slash flagrant and you will get 40 off your subscription assholes just do it get yourself a better night sleep with calm now let's get back to the show yo okay ready so uh mike pence yeah um he merengue'd up to the podium Think about it He was running gay But like me run gay
Starting point is 00:35:10 Is how you actually spell merengue Oh shit I know it's crazy Yo they be trying to get that Latin vote however they can 100 I haven't seen this yet Let me see these hips sway It's embarrassing dog
Starting point is 00:35:21 I mean it is truly You can't say you're straight and run like that Let me see these hips sway. This is embarrassing, dog. I mean, it is truly... You can't say you're straight and run like that. You own being gay? He's clapping like a monkey with cymbals. This shit is hilarious. That is a shoe sale run, bro. But you don't think that's gay?
Starting point is 00:35:38 I don't think that's gay. Nah, son, that is a cheerleader, bro. Why is that gay? My man was moving, bro. You don't think he was moving for an old man? It takes me three to four steps. Joe Biden had a way cooler run. Why is that gay? How would you run? My man was moving, bro. You don't think he was moving for an old man? It takes me three to four steps. Joe Biden had a way cooler run. Joe Biden's run? And he broke his whole foot.
Starting point is 00:35:50 My man is in a cast right now. Yeah, worth it, though, because he did that shit like a man. Yeah. He looked like he was back to life. Like, I thought they had a body double, and they just swapped it out right before he hit the stage. Like, that shit was impressive. I'm just saying, you don't think that's a good run for an old man? How many steps does it take you to get into your rhythm with running i'm 37 it takes me
Starting point is 00:36:08 a good two three steps for my feet straight son he's in a whole lot of rhythm here so yeah that's rhythm what's a song playing in the background yo y'all are hating he started with i think boys are playing in the background oh shit y'all are really hating bro who's my man in the back trying to walk straight yo go to my man in the back that just smashed him out. Watch it again. The dude in the back is walking like he don't want people to know he just fucked Mike Pence. Watch, watch. Right here, getting out the front.
Starting point is 00:36:31 Yeah, yeah. Well, let me get to something. I got to get there immediately. No, but you know who did the fucking, though? Who? That guy. That guy. That guy at the top.
Starting point is 00:36:39 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Pence takes a dick for sure, dude. Yeah, but this is a cheerleader run, yo. It's halftime is over. Yeah. Team is going to rally, and they're going to lead the way. Yeah, but this is a cheerleader run, yo. It's halftime's over. Yeah. Team is going to rally, and they're going to lead the way. Yeah, yeah. Y'all hate.
Starting point is 00:36:48 Pence was in charge of the music at the fucking Trump shows, huh? Oh, shit. Yeah. The YMCA? Yeah, all that shit. That's all Pence. Oh, shit. Dude, how did YMCA become so gay?
Starting point is 00:37:00 I mean, I think it was gay. No, but like- The song was because it was gay, but he said, how did the YMCA become a gay place? Yeah, it was Young Men's Christian Association. Christian is in the name. Because it's mad repressed.
Starting point is 00:37:11 Mike Pence is mad Christian. It's mad repressed gay people. So the repressed gays would go to the YMCA and just get stroked. Just blow each other, dog. That's the only place you could do it safely. I think it was also just the biggest one. So it was like a national chain of gyms that people could be naked and chilling in.
Starting point is 00:37:26 Oh, and gay guys are always gay at the gym. That's where they spend a lot of time. If you're going to get stroked out, I think it would probably be at a gym. And then the most popular gym is the one people know, oh, if I'm in a new town, I'm going to get a stroke. You think that's how gay people got in shape? They were just fucking there so much? They were like, I might be here. I might as well.
Starting point is 00:37:42 You guys want to lift a weight or two? Honestly, dude. they're like come on i'm here honestly dude ah and it's also so it's a gym also commonly associated with providing temporary housing to men see how i'll try to act like he's reading that he knows that shit we know where you dormed at in college come on man it's like a homeless shelter? How'd you pay tuition? Yeah, I guess so. Something. Well, they used to back in the day.
Starting point is 00:38:09 They don't anymore. Uh-huh. Yeah. All right. All right. Beyonce's clothing brand, Ivy Park, gets backlash after posting an ad featuring these two models who are Russian but present to be black. I cannot wait. I cannot wait. I cannot wait.
Starting point is 00:38:27 So these are white models that try to act like they're black. Yeah. I believe them. You believe what? Yo, they look black. Slow down. Them's some black ass girls, yo. I believe them.
Starting point is 00:38:40 Wait, but just click, click so we can get a little closer. Find the blackest ass picture of this girl. Because that one in the top middle does not look black. That's just Wheezy right there, bro. Tell me that ain't Wheezy. Wheezy's white. Yeah, yeah. Wheezy is half white.
Starting point is 00:38:53 Wheezy doing the same shit. She presents black. Oh, shit, bro. But these, they're just Russian. So they got no black whatsoever. They got no clean. Honestly, I think there's a reach to think that she's black. I don't see her as black at all.
Starting point is 00:39:04 That shit to the right right there, that looks a little bit black. Nah, you keep going. There's some black ass pictures out. It's not scrolling to the right ones. We'll go to the next girl. Stassi Baby is the best friend of Kylie. She's got like, well, that's the next one I saw listed. That look like black Miley Cyrus.
Starting point is 00:39:18 A little thicker. This is the other one. That's Stassi Baby. Okay, but that girl's not trying to be black. But go to the Ivy Park ad for that. Because that's the thing. She's thick as fuck. Be friends with Kylie, 10 million followers.
Starting point is 00:39:32 But she looks like she'd be heavy a bit. Not like in a... Al can't even focus anymore. Yeah, Al, you good? Al Dick keeps slamming against the bottom of the table in front of him. Someone knocking on the door um nah she's a little thick john little thick piece of work but go back to them fake black chicks go to the ivy park ad please al and then just no but they took
Starting point is 00:40:01 they took the picture down so i think that's the issue is like one like they look like they're kind of biting this whole black culture but also that beyonce of all people would feature them in one of her ads right black is king like it's that i think it's compounding it was some random brand that cast these chicks and be like whatever them some black ass girls yo this is actually the ivy park picture oh yeah they are definitely friends now here's the problem that's weenie and mandy she keep losing weight yeah they do be posing like that they wear the same shit they pose the same so here's here's the problem that's whorehive right there i know whorehive when i see whorehive what's up what's the problem i'm waiting i just gotta it out. Let him get it all out. It's out. He likes it.
Starting point is 00:40:45 It's out. He likes it. The problem is Beyonce doesn't okay everything with Ivy Park. I doubt she's even involved in the slightest. She has other people that do the work for her, and she attaches her brand to it. So those people down the line are hiring these models these no-name russian models and then beyonce gotta find out she hired fake black chicks if anything she probably
Starting point is 00:41:13 looked at the final pictures for approval she's not there and honestly if anything there's no way there's zero chance she's in casting looking at names yes i agree with you if anything no way yeah i i think the only thing she looked at is what the clothes look like because here's the thing is this the ad like on the ivy park website or is this like yeah is this their main banner is this just like oh yeah some random shit some random one that they use for social or is it in some random h&m store or whatever the fuck right i just think like she's so far removed and that's the dangerous thing when you say something is yours. Anything that happens within it,
Starting point is 00:41:48 you're going to get the smoke. So now you got to hope. Now she literally got to have a conversation with some of the people there and be like, don't hire no white people. Make sure everybody's black. That's the only way
Starting point is 00:42:00 we can be sure the smoke is not there. Yeah, when a person is the brand, they are ultimately responsible for all the brand's transgressions, regardless of if they're involved or not. If it's Tommy Hilfiger that does some fuck shit, you go, oh yeah, some intern at Tommy, sorry, as a company we apologize. When it's just a single person
Starting point is 00:42:16 facing the public, you gotta be like... And a public figure, because Tommy Hilfiger's a guy, but you don't know him. I don't know what he looks like. Yeah, of course. Beyonce is a public figure. And if you're opinionated, even worse. See, but the weird thing about Ivy Park is that they don't just show black women.
Starting point is 00:42:32 They show all types of women on the site. That's actually a good point. People decided they're presenting as black. They decided it was appropriation, but I don't think they tried to present as anything. They got Asian chicks that are trying to look black no i'm just saying what are you saying out any race can be an ivy park model exactly i know
Starting point is 00:42:53 my bad but no you know i hear i hear what you're saying but those girls didn't look like they were trying to be russian and they were wearing iv Park. They kind of looked as if they were presenting as black chicks. It wasn't blackface, but it was like... Kardashian type shit. Even more, don't you think? Tan skin, tight braids. Yeah, and the one girl that had the frizzy... I don't know what that's called.
Starting point is 00:43:18 Crimp. It was like crimped, whatever. Is that it? Is that what it's called? It is called that. Why do you know so much about women's hair? I grew up with three girls, bro. I grew up in a house full of girls guys you also love black girls though oh yeah that'd be loving them black chicks bro duh dove oh can we talk about it what his first son oh you like that one
Starting point is 00:43:38 yeah andrew knows my first yeah i know yeah that's amber bro wow it blew my mind what oh dove has always fucked way hotter girls not even just that she's hot but it's like oh i that girl is everywhere yeah she's a lovely person this guy i honestly it don't make any sense you look like a jewish josh acardo and you're just getting just you went real specific with that. Just for you, Dove. Literally just for me. Nobody else could know Shouts is Josh. Just for you. But Dove has been batting out of his league.
Starting point is 00:44:12 Is that the word? Yeah. Outkicking his coverage. Outkicking his coverage the entire time I've known him. It is unbelievable. You would not believe how hot the girls at Dove fucks are. To the point where I've had on multiple occasions asked if he pays to hot the girls that dove fucks are to the point where i've had on multiple occasions asked if he pays to fuck them out of my life i've been like how is it possible we're talking about
Starting point is 00:44:34 like 10 10s and dove is a very charming guy he's a very funny guy yeah right but he looks like he could be selling bread in morocco right Morocco. But still pulling while selling bread. Exactly. Unbelievable. No, I don't see that second part. I see the bread. Unbelievable. I'm baffled by it. It blew my mind. Have you seen it happen?
Starting point is 00:44:59 No. I want to. There's also ones in the sports world. Andrew, do they know about the one in the sports world? Who's the one in the sports world? He wants to show off. I just want to show off if you're going to have me in here. This is a sports podcast. All your fans want you to talk sports.
Starting point is 00:45:15 Okay. Remember. Bring up conflict within the audience. You get both. I think they like both, obviously. But remember Miss Alabama? No. Remember the girl that was featured during the BCS Bowl?
Starting point is 00:45:29 And the announcer was like, Oh, yeah, Brent Musburger. It was the Alabama National Championship. And he was being mad creepy about this hot girl in the audience. It was some football player's girl. Catherine Webb and AJ McCarron. Yeah. They're happily married with kids.
Starting point is 00:45:43 Look at that. She is. I mean, that is. Who was the boy before yeah and he was like look at that she is i mean that who was the who was the the boy before that wow you know you'd be getting these girls she came up before they come up good luck chuck believe me like after me they really go places you don't glow up after you get done man what are you doing bro you gotta adapt if if if you're charming and you see that they think you're charming go with that if they're annoyed by you keep talking their ear off until they just give up and they're like all right fine i'll give you that chance and never feel like you're getting
Starting point is 00:46:17 turned down so it is unbelievable i've seen him go through hell he was just like yeah if they hate you you just keep talking to them no no no they'll love you bro it is I'm not questioning I don't I believe you
Starting point is 00:46:29 I'm just like my mind is not understanding how that works there's a way you can can never get turned down there's a way school the audience buddy because this is fascinating
Starting point is 00:46:40 I'm just saying it's like a non-douchey pickup artist it's like a non-douchey pickup artist where it's like you go with a con make them think like they just met like oh if not oh he's a nice guy he's my friend i can always dial it back to there and then i'm like all right if i gotta i gotta play a longer game in this but they'll come around by the way what i'm what way, what Andrew knows is I'll get them the first night or six months later,
Starting point is 00:47:08 but six months later, they'll fall in love with me like they never had a love like that before. But you have to describe the 49% gay thing. Oh. Also, with these girls, if they say no, you would leave them alone, right? Leave them alone, but they come back. You know how to leave them alone. What are you doing? Bro, you got to help him.
Starting point is 00:47:24 I'm trying to give you comfort. And the worst case you doing? Bro, he's trying to help you. He's trying to give you coverage. And the worst case scenario is I tee up Andrew, or I used to. I'm out the cane, bro. Don't get me. What you doing? Used to. Used to.
Starting point is 00:47:33 Jesus Christ. I was the classic opener. No, the 49%? Okay, so part of Dove's game is pretending to be gay. Not pretending. I just understand them. Okay, what does that mean? It's unbelievable.
Starting point is 00:47:46 What the fuck does that mean? It's unbelievable, bro. It's unbelievable. This is fascinating, dog. It's unbelievable. I want to spend time on this. Go, go, go. They don't know if he's gay or not
Starting point is 00:47:54 until they're sucking his dick. They're sucking his dick and he's like complimenting the tracks in their hair. Like, oh girl, you're killing him with that hair. I like your barrettes. Those extensions are crazy. Is that crimp? So they have to understand the background.
Starting point is 00:48:07 It's like as many friends like Andrew I had, I grew up in a house. Well, my parents are fashion designers. So I knew the fashion game. I have two sisters, year older, year younger. So I learned everything on that. Let me interrupt real quick. We're going to get back to it.
Starting point is 00:48:19 Another thing that he does, like, you know how like Mark is filled with like useless knowledge about like um like science this yeah so like mark dove is is the same but about girls but since mark never fucked he didn't know what you know about girl shit so dove has all that like he'll walk up to a girl and he'll like smell her and he'll be like oh is that uh that fucking truffle can take down any perfume there's about 12 to 15 perfumes in the library and most girls 80 i would say 80 of girls probably use one of 10 to 15 perfumes and i could call these things out and whatever reason it's just like that becomes an opener opener so i just so
Starting point is 00:49:03 it's unbelievable so it's like you've never seen it happen and he'll find one little thing like a girl will be like yeah i'm actually from santorini he'll be like bernie batzi and it's like how do you know bernie batzi like he'll know one useless thing about everything in the world useless and he'll be able to like oh yeah of course and there's a little french restaurant by the way with the little crostinis oh my favorite place with the crostinis. The best crostini in the game. No wisdom.
Starting point is 00:49:28 Just pure facts that start the process. Start the conversation. The process. The process. He starts to wear on you after a while, but they don't know. Son. You know what I'm saying? The person he said he wanted to like, oh, I was trying to fuck her for so long.
Starting point is 00:49:43 I was just like, you're out. Shut the fuck up. Oh, no, no, no. That's her for so long i was just like you're out shut the fuck up oh no no no that's saying the names of just like these people you're looking at dove you're like stop feeding me bullshit like you have any chance with this girl it's unbelievably real and then you see who he actually fucks and you're like it's unbelievable it's unbelievable it's unbelievable what dove does with girls you do it comedy it's like you just know something about every fucking culture it just blows people's mind exactly i should have been focused on fucking perfume shit just learn a
Starting point is 00:50:11 few of those real talk dude so he'll do all these little things on all these little he'll know like nail color like he'll be like a specific color if it's like a super dark you and i will go with the girl we'll be like like oh i like that you super dark purple. You and I will go with the girl. We'll be like, oh, I like that. You got some red, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And Dove will go like this. He'll be like. It's ox blood.
Starting point is 00:50:33 Yeah. It's Linkin Park. Don't cook your mouth like that. There's literally Linkin Park After Dark by OPI. And you'll be like, that little fact. Yeah, it's a name. For the girls listening, they'll be like, yep, that's an actual real color. Are we getting in the wide what dumb looks like?
Starting point is 00:50:50 Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. I look like you. I know, but you're cute. You're a pussy. But you're cute. You could have. You had to put the effort in.
Starting point is 00:51:02 You had to learn. I need to learn about sports. I know, like a fucking. I i look like him and i have my game if i had his eyes forget it forget it done but it's you gotta see that you also another thing is um no shame we'll talk to anybody any girl doesn't matter the situation no shame and also like when he approaches them it's kind of like funny it's, they don't even know they're really being approached. Yeah. Because you don't see it coming.
Starting point is 00:51:27 That's why I never feel like I'm getting turned down and they don't see it coming. Yeah. Oh. I say, thank you, gay. Yes. It's okay. But how do you transition out of gay? It's okay.
Starting point is 00:51:37 Because they slowly realize, I don't need to tell them. They will slowly realize, oh shit, he's not gay. He's not a Brad Chad, like, bro-y guy. He knows everything I like. Did I just fall in love? Like, I'm telling you. So what is a girl's biggest, like, fear, if you will? And I'm not talking about real fear, like, their life.
Starting point is 00:51:59 But, like, what is their biggest, like, obstacle when meeting a person, right? Like, they'll get murdered or something? Well, I think that's, like, the real crazy ones. But if it's an average guy it's like he's gonna try to fuck me and i just don't want to be bothered oh yeah he wants something from me yeah and i think dove presents in such a mysterious way because he's so non-threatening he's funny he can talk about anything but like the girl doesn't pick up on that he's trying to fuck me vibe so there's no threat and she actually kind of like i don't know it's all what's it called what is it uh you have your arm you have your defenses down your shields are all down so then
Starting point is 00:52:31 she actually starts talking that's a guard down the guard is down if you were like a super good-looking dude you'd probably do worse the girls I'm a super good-looking dude languages in my I got languages in my arsenal I got a whole arsenal That's what makes a dude gorgeous Yo what's the best part Best looking part about you Tall, dark, handsome
Starting point is 00:52:50 Languages If you close your eyes I'm beautiful You're like what? Just listen to me This is interesting So Dove didn't know He was okay looking
Starting point is 00:52:58 Until Right now He doesn't believe it Until 20 seconds ago He doesn't believe it But he didn't know He was mom dog doting Oh 100% He didn't know he was okay looking until dating apps and i remember those things i remember once dating apps came out and it was just a meat market i remember him like telling
Starting point is 00:53:17 he came to me we're having sushi we're having he take me to this place at sushi in la and of course it's like on th Thursdays between like six and eight, you get like 50% off, right? So we're there at like 5.59 and he's fucking truffling with the waiter like, ah, I know it's not six, but can we order now? He's just trying to get over it. What perfume is that? And she's like in like some like Asian accent, obviously probably Japanese.
Starting point is 00:53:38 Like she's trying to go, oh, the system doesn't allow you to do it. And he's like, ah, but just tell the chef. And he's like, it's a minute. Just wait 60 seconds, fast talking him so so we're there and uh he starts i was like how's everything going you don't have a girl yet or he said i'm getting crushed by this fucking dating app shit i go i think he talks about like the stock market yeah we're getting a bath on we're selling we're selling all right they go i, what do you mean? I shorted Tinder. I fucked up.
Starting point is 00:54:07 Got on Bumble. Put all my eggs in the Bumble basket. What do you mean you're getting crushed? He goes, yeah, it's just a fucking meat market out there, right?
Starting point is 00:54:13 And they don't get the, what is it? What do you call it? They don't get the shtick. I can't do a thing. I go, what do you mean? Well, it's just a picture and my stats aren't great.
Starting point is 00:54:22 You know what I mean? How do you show you're gay on Tinder? What do I do? How do i do with the thing what's a guy to do on tinder i mean you need me to suck a dick on my profile what's going on so and it is a fascinating thing to happen where like dating apps kind of fucked guys with game yes that weren't quote-unquote traditionally uh handsome like a fucking the brad chad types or the brad chad types girls are 100 getting guys with worse personalities now because of dating apps oh yes because you're just swiping on they complain about it and the thing is you know how it used to be like you'd go to a bar and then girls said oh it's just a
Starting point is 00:55:00 girl's night tonight we're not really talking to guys like now it's for real that they're doing it like now it's because they have 50 guys that they're literally each matching. On the way, by the way, on the way to your engagement party, Andrew puts us on a sprinter bus. Thank you, but it was nice. In the backseat in the third row.
Starting point is 00:55:17 He complained. Thank you, it was nice. Send me my car. Do you know the apartment that I grew up in, bro? Do you know what I grew up in? You expect to get the same car as the fucking groom and bride? Are you going to the hotel like, they got the honeymoon suite? I got the two queens.
Starting point is 00:55:35 My entitlement issues are waggled, by the way. The way that he worked, I could see his fucking brain working. We get to the engagement party, right? There's the tables, right? The tables have like a seating thing right now like i don't put any thought into this seating thing i'm just like i just want some people to know like you know sit next to each other and i want to make sure there are any singles that they're around right dove starts like truffle sniffing for the what the name placements are and he sees he's like at the table that me and emma are at a little down and uh i point and i go yeah yeah you're over are and he sees he's like at the table that me and em are at a little down and uh i point
Starting point is 00:56:06 and i go yeah yeah you're over there and he goes uh and he goes oh okay things are going according to plan tonight like yes i'm like snarky like he was literally gonna be upset he was gonna be upset if he wasn't at the fucking table hundred percent because the other girl didn't have a date either so you both had to sit next to each other way to set up so that girl was in the back third row in the little bus on the way over there and i one girl tells the other girl like oh what are you doing tomorrow night i don't know i'll go on a date let me check hinge literally didn't even know who she was going to talk to just to plan that night so what i'm saying is back in the day guys that would go up to girls andrew was also one
Starting point is 00:56:45 of these guys before like that was we won we did it because we were brave it benefited us bravery was beneficial back in the day and then the dating app shit it definitely rewards cowards does it swing back though so now women are this generation's having these like sort of lackluster dates where like i'm hooking up these hot guys but it's just like meaningless i feel nothing and then it swings back do you know what i to that point you know what i heard a girl say one of my my girlfriend's friends said this recently i was like uh she said she was going on a date and i was like how'd you meet the person and then she said this in like a surprise tone she was like uh he actually like came up to me in person yeah like like like that was novel yeah right and she was like yeah i
Starting point is 00:57:26 thought it was like really hot he just like walked up to me and he just like started talking to me and then like asked me out and said like to go on a date to them that's foreign but the chutzpah if you will still resonates man cables are turning it's still fucking resonating come back your shot learn your perfumes. Anyway. I mean, after COVID, do you guys think about what it's going to be like in the world? Is it going to be dated? I think it's going to be the roaring 20s. The great Gatsby people are going to be...
Starting point is 00:57:55 They're going to be going for it. They're going for it. Really? Florida. Think about that. Someone's going to say, have a rule or be tense about one thing. I'm going to look them in the face and be like, COVID. Have you ever been badly rejected by a girl?
Starting point is 00:58:10 Like she just like was just like really. Yeah, but I live in L.A. and there's some horrible people in L.A. No, no. The worst thing, the thing that offends me the most. Not to my face. People don't offend me to my face. He's never going to admit this. Flakes.
Starting point is 00:58:23 He's never going to admit this. I'll tell you the worst rejection. I'll admit. I will admit. They're horrible people. They're horrible. They're vicious. If you don't fuck me, you're a horrible human.
Starting point is 00:58:39 Kyle, you're a family. Oh my God. No, no. The worst is not to your face. Who raised you? Your father? You ever met someone they didn't like you yeah i know some idiots that was a fucking absolutely flaking has increased out of tenfold oh yeah would you guys agree canceled on right getting canceled so to my face no but we
Starting point is 00:58:56 don't agree we're all married yeah over here so you were getting flaked on and you've never experienced this you couldn't believe it and also you weren't closing the deal and you were really upset financially because the date would cost a certain amount of money i calculated it it would put it all in numbers this really is a stock market it's the truffle bro the truffle this is a stock market bro that's crazy so what i wonder are your standards super high like do you have a pretty high average? Absurd. But clearly, it works.
Starting point is 00:59:28 What's the ugliest girl in terms of ratings that you've ever taken down? Like a four? Like a Miss McGregor? Honestly, you know what I think it is? I don't go under a seven. I think because he is gay, partly. 49%. The girls need to be so beautiful that like you know how like
Starting point is 00:59:45 yes oh that they look like guys or something not that they look like androgynous just like when you get to a shirt the pressure to turn him on
Starting point is 00:59:53 is so high yes like a nice jawline I'm not getting turned on for anything because most of me is gay so the straight part of me needs a much
Starting point is 01:00:00 oh like a straight guy sees like a girl with big titties that's super ugly and goes I can work with that she's got big titties but right but if you got 49 you say 49 but they need to understand what that means you know what i mean they say 49 percent he's saltbated real quick real quick okay so i think like you can get to a point of good looking right
Starting point is 01:00:33 like there are guys that are like let's say these like male models that look almost like effeminate but you can look at them you can be like you are an attractive human being yeah i don't want to fuck you you're some dude but at the same time i'm not gonna lie and say you're not a beautiful looking person i love cobra kai that's 49 i'll tell eat i'll tell a guy gorgeous but i don't want that so gorgeous but i can say it because i think once you go to 51 you're you're gay like there's no i don't think, 51 and 99, you just like guys. I could say, like, that guy is a good-looking dude. I want that guy's eyes and abs, but I don't want to be with them sexually. My girl brought up a point the other day that she asked you, she said, why can't you be 50-50? No, because it goes over the line.
Starting point is 01:01:19 It goes over the number. No. That's bisexual. There's no such thing as that for guys. There's no such thing. Yo, is that true about uh what star lord's character yeah marvel decided chris pratt's character was gay that's his punishment for that is so funny that's foul that shit is he's already fucking aliens you will make him fuck more shit son then his girl green son and you know what chris isn't it yeah in the thing gamora yeah gamora's green what, they said he's bisexual?
Starting point is 01:01:46 So now I guess his character's gonna come out as bisexual? And you know they're doing that shit on purpose, bro? You think they negotiated with him? You gotta make more? They're like, yo, your character's gay. And he's like, best I can do is buy. We'll go, we'll split it with you. We'll split the difference.
Starting point is 01:02:01 And that was because he said some shit, right? Or the church he goes to. The church he goes to. Yo, honestly, that's what this is. It might be his idea. Is it a PR move where he goes, I'm not gay. Or I'm not anti-gay. I'm so not anti-gay.
Starting point is 01:02:15 I'm going to be a gay character. I'm going to deal with all these homophobic rumors for as long as I exist in Hollywood as a Christian. If I play the gay character, I won't go all the way gay, like you're saying, I'll go half Cs. If I play that, I can't be called homophobic
Starting point is 01:02:32 because I leaned into it. That's a brilliant PR move by him. Here's the thing. Who is in co-starring with him in the newest Guardians of the Galaxy? I don't know. Do you know? One sexy motherfucker.
Starting point is 01:02:43 What happens at the end of Avengers Endgame Thor Chris Chris Hemsworth Is in that ship With him remember And there's that whole scene It's really funny
Starting point is 01:02:53 About I'm the captain Oh yeah Of course you are They're actually really funny together And they were Sexual attention before And now there's It's real
Starting point is 01:02:59 Now it's fucking real dude Man that's gonna be so Oh yeah Dude if you're bi You're definitely getting Sm smoked out by Thor. 100%. He's got literally... You go like this and your dick is going to fly into it.
Starting point is 01:03:11 He's got literally a hammer. That's his whole weapon. I would go 51% for Chris Hemsworth. Would you go 51% for Chris Hemsworth? No, but in Thor, when he took off that shirt... Who would you go 51% for? It's like an auction. Can I get 50, 50, 50, 51, 51?
Starting point is 01:03:24 Just know it. I will tell all the guys who I get 50, 50, 50, 51, 51. I will tell all the guys who are good looking, that's a good looking guy. Saying someone's good looking, you don't have to be gay. That's literally math. All I know, seeing four guys look at me right now, the second I name a name, don't you guys do something on this guy at the same time?
Starting point is 01:03:41 You think it's like Nickelodeon? You think you're going to get slimed or some shit? We also jerked off. The orange bl You're going to get slimed or some shit? We all search for it all the time. The orange blimp is going to dump the thing on me? No, but Chris is a gorgeous man. Yeah, you have such high standards for women. I'm trying to see who's your guy standard. Yeah, do you have high standards for guys?
Starting point is 01:03:58 Or do you like, you'll just take any old thing? I'm sure some women that are trying to have sex with you are wondering who you think the hottest guy is. So like if you were to like casually chat him up, what would you say? I think Chris Hemsworth is a piece. Piece, right? Sober piece. Grab him by his ponytail.
Starting point is 01:04:10 That just worked, bro. That just worked. Yeah, that was good. You did it. But you're not going to be with Chris Hemsworth. Never. Never. I want his abs, his eyes, the flowy hair like Mark's.
Starting point is 01:04:19 Nope. Yes. He's dead inside of you. Never. It's an easy. That's why the whole 49% thing is super easy i could always give then girls like that like i could talk to a girl be like oh that who like the girl's friend and they're talking about a guy oh let me see your guy oh that guy's pretty
Starting point is 01:04:37 made up a thing that guy's pretty cute yeah and then it just allows him to relate to girls because he's not good looking enough to get them just off looks. By the way, also... Yo, that's disrespectful. I want to see if he gets that. I want to see if he gets that. But also, another one of my moves, I'm like... Why are you throwing shade? I have a lot of gay friends.
Starting point is 01:04:56 Have gay friends. That also helps you with girls. Oh, do the gay friends try to throw it at you, though? No, no, no. Once they know they're fun and they're flirting, I love them. I love my gays. And they will help you. Do they ever go at you?
Starting point is 01:05:09 Do they try to grab Schmeckle? No, no, no. Schmeckle? Schmeckle after Schmeckle? You've never had them come after Schmecks? Nope. Never once. I felt mad good the other day.
Starting point is 01:05:17 Like, you know when you're wearing some fly shit, and dude's like, oh, that's ill, whatever. Dove commented on my outfit, and that's different when you get a comment from me. Yeah, when you get a gay, like a 49% gay. Nah, he was like, yo, that's a really nice outfit. I'm like, alright, I look good. Which outfit was it? I don't even know. It was with the gold, but I think, don't you New Yorkers love when we comment on your
Starting point is 01:05:35 Jordans and your, like, he was wearing, like, a hat and leather. You said the whole outfit. Like, the whole outfit with the cat. He said the whole outfit, sir. He said, don't take that back, sir. You said the whole outfit. Oh, now you want the whole outfit with the cat. He said the whole outfit, sir. Don't take that back, sir. You said the whole outfit. Oh, now you want the whole outfit. Al wants all 49%.
Starting point is 01:05:52 He wants all 49%. I want my stroke. Ego stroke. You said the whole outfit. No, Al is the flyest dresser. Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. Forget that. I want that. Al is my favorite dresser in the studio, for sure. Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. Forget that. I want that.
Starting point is 01:06:05 Al is my favorite dresser in the studio, for sure. That's disrespectful, bro. Sorry. That's disrespectful. Sorry. I liked it. I mean, that's disrespectful, bro. I love you, though.
Starting point is 01:06:17 Nah, Al does dress well. I mean, I dress better than Al, but Al does dress well. But my suit game is better than all yours. That's all I care about. Everything else, I go basics. My suits are good. You did that LA all black shit. I hate that shit.
Starting point is 01:06:30 It's slimming. I'll try to get back at you for taking away his compliment. Because they took the New York shit. Now you're stupid ass all black. Stupid fucking stupid LA shit. I'm wearing your slides. Fucking losers. I got Crocs at home.
Starting point is 01:06:40 They took the New York shit. That used to be our shit. What, wearing all black? Yeah. We still do. Yeah, but now it's an outfit for them the black i just did it because it was slimming like every my colleagues would stop wearing white t-shirts you could see the lines like all right it was getting thick yeah i'm better that was getting thick bro he's really pulling bro i remember him getting fat and being like there's no way he's still
Starting point is 01:07:05 like an orbit of a planet you just get stuck in that shit spinning around all right fellas what else we got a vaccine y'all taking it we don't need it we don't need it bro let him work out the kinks it's just like waiting for the next iphone you know what i mean yeah yeah what do you think i say that only because somebody reached out uh to me in the dinks. She's like waiting for the next iPhone. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you think about that? Let's just not say that. Only because somebody reached out to me in the DMs and he was like, his uncle got COVID. Yeah, he sent me that. And then about like two months later, his uncle got COVID again and actually passed away.
Starting point is 01:07:34 So let's not spread that rumor that you can't get it twice. All right, guys. Let's pay some bills real quick. And you know how we're going to pay bills? By helping you save money on yours. That's right. Most of you got student loans and they're crushing. And you probably not. Most of you got student loans and they're crushing. So what we're going to do is save you some money by telling you
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Starting point is 01:08:28 one easy-to-make monthly payment. Maybe just get a better rate. Earnest makes it easy, and if you go to Earnest.com slash flagrant, you get a $100 cash bonus when you refinance your student loan with Earnest.com. Again, earnest.com slash flagrant get a hundred dollar bonus guys you're welcome let's get back to the show all right but seriously what else we got man we just went all through all that fire we got some more fire we got some more fire for that anus oh do you want to talk vaccine oh actually yeah we were talking real quick this is gonna sell chris pratt yeah go back to that i think what he's gonna do is be like hey i'm bisexual we don't need to show it in the movie because I don't want to portray him differently
Starting point is 01:09:06 as the character the character just happens to be bisexual he's in love with Gamora he just happens to be bisexual so you don't have to write no gay shit in his thing he just plays the character normally and be like why would I change the way I act just because I'm bisexual it has no impact on who I am
Starting point is 01:09:22 it's like Spongebob now he woke cause I didn't change the character I see everybody as equal because I'm bisexual. It has no impact on who I am. It's like SpongeBob. Now he, yeah, yeah. Interesting. Now he woke. Now he's woke. Because I didn't change the character. I see everybody as equal. Ah, they Dumbledore'd him.
Starting point is 01:09:32 Dumbledore the boy. Dumbledore was gay? Yeah, for now. Really? That was J.K. Rowling's whole shit. She was just calling everyone gay and stuff. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:09:40 In like a good way. How do you figure Dumbledore's gay? What'd he do to his gay? She just said he was gay after the books were written. But what'd he do to his gay? I mean, dress? after the books were written but what do you do to his gay I mean dress yeah he wore dress all time he's a wizard mad sparkly his beard was really well kept
Starting point is 01:09:52 Harry Potter was a wizard he wore slacks yeah no he wasn't he was a wizard apprentice he wasn't a full wizard yet at the end he ain't wearing no motherfucking gown he's wearing pants from express when he was at the end with his kids, that's different. Wizard ass man. Because he was at the motherfucking nine and three quarters, son. You can't
Starting point is 01:10:09 go to nine and three quarters dressed in your wizard outfit. They gonna know. You're a muggle. What other? Muggle? You're a muggle. Muggle, muggle. Yeah. What does your gay dar say about Dumbledore? She said he was gay. No, what does your gay dar say? What do you say? In real life, nah. He's not gay. Now, the dude from Lord She said he was gay. No, what did your gay dog say?
Starting point is 01:10:25 What did you say? In real life, no. He's not gay. Now, the dude from Lord of the Rings is gay. Which one? In real life. Sir Ian McKellen. Sir Ian McKellen. That's actual.
Starting point is 01:10:34 You have Sir in your name, yeah. Hold up, hold up. Wait, Star Trek? That's what they call gay people in England. Magneto is gay in real life. Nah, B. Patrick Stewart is gay, yo. Nah, he's not gay.
Starting point is 01:10:44 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fuck out of here. Fuck out of here, yo. Fuck out of here. This guy is crazy. Hold on, hold on. He's gay. I don't understand. Is Magneto is gay or Gandhi's gay?
Starting point is 01:10:56 Which one of them are gay, bro? No, I mean, I need to know this for real. Magneto, in real life, Sir Ian McKellen, is gay. And that dude's mad old. He's been gay for a long ass time. Openly gay since 1988. Nah, B. Uh-oh, Al.
Starting point is 01:11:14 Why does this sound like a local restaurant? Openly gay since 88. Yo, more like Gandalf the gay. Oh, man. Nah, for real though, he's gay? Why would nobody make a big deal about that? gay. Oh, man. For real, though? He's gay? Why would nobody make a big deal about that?
Starting point is 01:11:29 I think he's been gay for so long. Because the whole Lord of the Rings is gay as fuck. Why? Them little boys were gay for each other, Sam and Frodo.
Starting point is 01:11:34 Yeah, they were gay for hours. Hey, come on. Cut that out, bro. Sam got married at the end, dog. To what? Sam got married to get into the blonde joint. Y'all are real disrespectful, dude.
Starting point is 01:11:43 You talking about Orlando Bloom, that blonde fucking archer? That motherfucker right. Y'all are real disrespectful, dude. You talking about Orlando Bloom, that blonde fucking archer? That motherfucker right there is a cute motherfucker right there. 51% bro. 51% right there. Can I say something? Can I say something?
Starting point is 01:11:54 That's an elf. And elven people do not count as human beings. You can smash male or female elves. Wait, is that true? Yeah. Yes. I didn't know what the official ruling on that was. That's the official ruling. That makes is that true? Yeah. Yes. I didn't know
Starting point is 01:12:06 what the official ruling on that was. That's the official ruling. That makes you feel a lot better. That's the official ruling, yo, for real. That motherfucker
Starting point is 01:12:11 with his little bow. Shoot me, Cupid. I see you, Orlando. You know what I'm saying? I'll show you something that could bloom. Nah, but for real, though, congratulations to you and Katy Perry on your marriage. And I hope everything works out.
Starting point is 01:12:31 Oh, fuck. But if it don't. All right, guys, let's take a break real quick so I can tell you about Whoop. I've been talking about it for a little while now. Right before I got Corona, I put on the Whoop. And I have been using it every day. It is a personalized fitness wearable, you put it on 24-7, and it tells you everything these other little
Starting point is 01:12:51 fucking fitness trackers tell you about, plus times a thousand, every day when you get up, Whoop gives you a recovery score that tells you how well you slept, and how much that helped you recover from your strain the previous day, it also measures how hard your body worked the previous day. Guys, there's no other fitness wearable doing this. I have been using it, and I know I have insomnia, but thanks to Whoop, I know I need to download one of these Calm apps and get my ass to sleep because I am not recovering well. Alex, you might not be sleeping well either.
Starting point is 01:13:21 You've been working on a little project. This Whoop, it's great, but it's been making me feel bad because i see how much little sleep i've been getting and i see how much little exercise i've been doing so yes but it's december 15th december 17th premiere and then december 18th thanks to whoop you back in the gym and you back getting some sleep you know you got to thank for that who Whoop. That is true. Whoop. There it is, motherfucker. So thanks to Flagrant, you can get 15% off. That's right. 15% off. Thanks to me.
Starting point is 01:13:50 I save you money. That's what I do. You're welcome. Go to whoop.com, W-H-O-O-P, and enter code flagrant at checkout, and you will get 15% off your order. I sleep better, recover faster, train smarter, optimize your performance. That's what we're about on this podcast, optimizing your life
Starting point is 01:14:07 with Whoop. Now let's get back to the show. Alright, what else we got, man? Do you want to just answer if we're getting a vaccine? None of y'all get it? I'm not getting a vaccine. I'm waiting, yo. I'm cured. I'm cured. I'ma wait. I'm cured. So that's not a no. You're cured. That's not a no. You're cured. Are
Starting point is 01:14:23 you getting it? I'ma wait. But what does that mean? After you wait, are you're cured are you getting it i'm gonna wait but what does that mean after you wait are you gonna get it what does i'ma wait me yeah i'ma get the what stupid answer was that the best non-answer hey let me ask you a question you could say the same thing right um how could we waste three seconds on the podcast yo he froze again. Buffering. I'm awake. No, in all seriousness, come on.
Starting point is 01:14:52 Why wouldn't you get it? I might get it down the road like six months or something because I heard the antibodies last for a few months. That's what I've heard. Bro, a few months was like... Part of me thinks people like the rules because it gives them comfort and structure. And then as soon as you get it, you no longer have to abide like the rules because it gives them comfort and structure and then as soon as you get it
Starting point is 01:15:05 you no longer have to abide by the rules you're actually bothering me so much you know you pedantic ass motherfucker as soon as you get
Starting point is 01:15:11 corona you got some earthly knowledge hey part of me just had this revelation that people like rules because of structure Dove does that same shit
Starting point is 01:15:19 but it's about lipstick yeah I mean technically the ones that you spin actually get mashed more what you can actually do is get a tie people love the rules so much that as soon as they get corona they're like oh i don't technically have to follow the rules so then that makes the rules dumb so they're like oh no i have to think that the rules still apply to me because i can still get it he said he said you love the
Starting point is 01:15:38 rules he said you love the rules he called both y'all simps. He called y'all cucks. He called y'all fascists. That was a whole lot of nothing he just said. He said nothing. He said nothing. He said nothing, yo. That's the Marxist right there. He just talking about religion right now. That's what he talking about. Oh, shit.
Starting point is 01:15:53 Oh, shit. You don't let him come at your religion? Wait, what did he say? Let me be mad. Let me be mad. What did he say? All those rules that just gives you comfort and structure. Oh, shit.
Starting point is 01:16:03 Oh, shit. But when you give it up, you really don't abide by them oh what's up that motherfucker done flipped it on you hey hear the script he just got flipped i'm in a spin cycle big time that was quick how'd you do that shit? I don't know, bro. Yo, you did that so fast, Al. Son, you don't got no Corona fog in your brain. You on the other hand. Is that a real thing,
Starting point is 01:16:31 Corona fog? I heard. But you heard so much shit. What are you talking about you heard? You just heard every symptom? That's real shit. I wouldn't know.
Starting point is 01:16:38 I wouldn't know. I didn't get corona. Read up. Read up. Read up. I said that shit right in Al's face. He was so serious. Nah, that's real shit. Read up. You said that shit. I don't see Al's face. He was so serious.
Starting point is 01:16:45 Nah, it's real shit. Read up. You guys got corona because you don't believe in God. He didn't protect you. Oh, shit. Unlike me. You got it too.
Starting point is 01:16:53 No, I didn't. And you got it the worst. I tested positive. You got it the worst. I tested positive. I did not get it. You tested positive because you got it
Starting point is 01:16:58 and people don't even know the real symptoms you had. Say the real symptoms. I watched Mario Kart. You watched Mario Kart? He said not to mention the assets. Corona fog. Corona fog.
Starting point is 01:17:08 Corona fog. I didn't watch it. I had a corona fog, bro. That was a real corona fog. Here's what's going on. There's fog in your brain, bro. Oh, gosh. Alex Media, they're so mad at me.
Starting point is 01:17:18 You had corona and you... They are so mad because corona was feasting on them. You had diarrhea? Corona was feasting on them so much bro it was corona was feisty on them his girl snitched on him son i was at home drinking my time his girl told us he had explosive diarrhea i've never had it never happened she goes the multiple times i had to hand some toilet paper in the bathroom because he was finishing
Starting point is 01:17:46 rolls of toilet paper. Wow. He was just bleeding out of his ass. That's not true. She said he took the laptop in there and just started working from the fucking toilet.
Starting point is 01:17:54 No. Never happened, bro. So how do you let Corona fuck your butthole? Bro, how did you let Corona get in your mouth in the first place? Mouth is whatever,
Starting point is 01:18:03 but the Corona entered you from the rear. It got in your mouth. You got rear fucked That shit is whatever. But the Corona entered you from the rear. It got in your mouth. You got rear fucked by the Rona. You got Corona from Akash. You got his germs all in your mouth, bro. That is suspect. That's what we do.
Starting point is 01:18:12 That's what we do, bro. That's love, son. 51. His germs are going up my sphinct. What? Yo, Corona got in your sphinct. No, it wasn't. I would never let Corona get that far down with me.
Starting point is 01:18:22 No, that was to Combi. No. Yes. Wait a minute. Mm-hmm. I had Mexican. I had Mexican that day. sphincter no it wasn't i would never let corona get that far down no that was to combi no yes wait a minute i had mexican i had mexican that day no you didn't have mexican we didn't have mexican the entire time because that lasted four days son like fuck out here what kind of yeah sometimes i like to work from the bathroom what's wrong with that this she said this from the bathroom ones you said this she said what did i say she said that he was he was in there with the diarrhea and then she just heard him go i'm sweating we don't have a fan in our bathroom that shit went out and so now it gets humid and it was after a shower so it's all fogging up the
Starting point is 01:18:56 mirror you let corona do that no it's because it was really hot in the bathroom okay not because of corona no i got pneumonia like a man son son have we told people you got pneumonia yeah yeah your mom's about to freak the fuck out she listens to this she's about to text all of us lies and deflections you had pneumonia this whole time alex fucking with us that motherfucker motherfucker was so in depth with his lies and deflections i love you bob okay what else we got man we all getting vaccinated i'm already vaccinated by the virus the virus vaccinated me but you think people take that answer though like you try to fly and
Starting point is 01:19:36 they're like oh you gotta have a negative test like or they're gonna be like they're doing that in places i have a negative test where's your vaccine i not to, but I have to go get tested before I go to Hawaii. What if they say you have to have the vaccine in order to do shit? Yeah, I'm going to get it. Then you got to get it. Yeah, because I'm not going to start a fucking crusade over something I already have. That is some shit.
Starting point is 01:19:57 With your fucking rules and regulations, ask religion. Start a crusade. That's what you do. Catholics. He said it so mean. Let's go, son. Did Catholicism ever get to India? Nope. Stopped you at the border.
Starting point is 01:20:13 Yeah, because it was so sweaty over there. We'd be all in the bathroom being like, it's so sweaty. You're going to get the toilet paper for your diarrhea ass. Alright, what else we got? We got the big and solid shits and rivers. The Federal Trade Commission
Starting point is 01:20:30 is seeking to a permanent injunction in federal court that could require Facebook to divest assets like Instagram and WhatsApp calling for the company to break it up.
Starting point is 01:20:40 Did you write this or did you copy paste the title? I kind of like pieced it together. Okay. It was like a copy paste. Fair enough. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:20:46 Fair enough. Because the real shit was bad long and I was like, I got to get you. That shit was heady, bro. I got lost midway through that. You said injunction. I said, huh? But yeah, I don't think that's right. So what does that mean?
Starting point is 01:20:56 They're just basically blockbusting or like trust busting Facebook? Yeah. Listen, I'm all about trust busting, but don't be buzzing my business. You know what I mean? We need Instagram right now. Facebook, I'm all about trust busting, but don't be busting my business. You know what I mean? We need Instagram right now. Facebook, you could take. But Instagram, we need to use Instagram. So as long as we can use the gram to get to the people.
Starting point is 01:21:13 No, but I think it's going to be on some like, oh, you got to break it up and then force them to sell it to somebody else. Like the fake shit they do at AT&T? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That fake ass shit. Way to break up AT&T, guys. You did a great job killing AT&T.
Starting point is 01:21:25 It's like this all around. Everything's fine. You just made some other guy richer. You're just handing the money over to someone else. That's stupid. You think maybe it makes the product better? If Instagram completely separates from Facebook? Nah, because I think that they both use each other's data. I think in the data game,
Starting point is 01:21:42 it's just the more data you got, the better. That's my assumption but i don't know if you cross over data between instagram and facebook why wouldn't you i mean must right no they do yeah have to so i think yeah the more data you have the better but like these motherfuckers are gonna find a way around it but is there ever a case where that's okay for the government to break up a company i mean yeah you had to do it i guess back in the day why like um because there were unfair uh working practices not working practice because it was eventually it hurts the consumer yeah it becomes so non-competitive yeah like the barrier to entry
Starting point is 01:22:15 into an industry is so high that it's like i mean the capitalists would say it's anti-capitalistic yeah maybe just basically we have this like monopolistic but they were saying that about walmart 10 years ago and then amazon comes in the game and it's like yo i'm here my dad's saying real quick some people argue that walmart should have been shut down years ago because what will happen is a walmart will come into a small town they'll exist and then literally all the mom and pop shops in that town that sell similar things to walmart will go out of business because walmart will actually specifically undercut all of them with the products. They will lose money on those products that competitors in the market are also selling. So be like, all right, you're exhibiting unfair business practices because the whole idea of capitalism is that these different companies
Starting point is 01:22:57 compete and they lower the price while increasing the quality. That's the idea. But if there is no competition, anti-capitalistic the reason why amazon hasn't been chopped up yet is because it hasn't affected the consumer so it happens when walmart's the only game in town this hasn't happened yet but essentially they could raise prices to as much as they want but they don't they don't which is why it's good and the people don't care but eventually let's say they got to the point where they could if they wanted to then all of a sudden the people be like whoa whoa whoa, whoa, what the fuck? I don't like Walmart that much. As long as the prices are low enough where the people are fine, the government I don't think cares about the average mom and pop shop.
Starting point is 01:23:32 That's my assumption. So that's why Walmart hasn't been broken up or Amazon hasn't been broken up. But Facebook, you don't have to pay to use it. You don't have to pay to use Instagram. You don't have to pay to use WhatsApp. Consumer's not being affected. So why does the company need to be broken up? The mom and pop shops love it because it allows them to target people with the products
Starting point is 01:23:48 that they're selling this is the people don't want this well that's the thing is they're not gonna just they're not gonna get rid of instagram or shit they're just gonna break them up or do whatever they feel like they're different companies like whatsapp is a telecom company instagram is it's like sony makes tvs they make movies like they go separately yeah i think the craziest one is real quick dove just on this point i think that the reason why the government is stepping in is because they feel a lack of control over the company yeah and they're just like oh well maybe if we exhibit some control they'll start to play nice and we're existing in a time where like corporations have more power than the government potentially.
Starting point is 01:24:25 And I think there has been times in history that probably mirror this. I don't know, maybe like the big oil barons and shit like that. Didn't somebody give a loan to the United States government to keep it? Multiple times. Rockefeller, but also Governor Morris, I believe his name. He bankrolled the Revolutionary Army, the Revolutionary War. So this has happened multiple times.
Starting point is 01:24:52 But something will happen where the government will basically just big dick them. But who knows what it is. Now what you were saying, Doug? I was saying like with Facebook and Instagram, you pay them for ads. They take percentages here or there. That model works for the consumer and the business. The thing that's scary is if you ever go to amazon you see how you start like saying oh amazon's always pushing after i search for a product from some mom and pop that has like their own product now they're pushing all these amazon basics
Starting point is 01:25:15 and they'll they have the data to say you know what i'm going to make this a dollar less than the mom and pop so they're using your data against you that's going to be i think the future scary thing we're using it for you in a way because you actually but again no but against if we're going to say like we're all part of the mom and that's where it's egregious bro it's like if you're going to be a marketplace for all of us to sell shit that's dope if you're going to start competing for us on with us on your own marketplace it's like you're just being selfish right now so that's a little too greedy right it's also worth noting with this this is just them calling for it so we don't know we don't know if this goes through.
Starting point is 01:25:46 We don't know what happens. This could just be saber rattling on their part where they're like, yeah, we're on to you. And like you said, if you don't start handing over data, if you don't start doing our bidding, then we might have to come through and fuck it up. It's like when they blow up your car in the mafia movies. It's like they're not trying to kill you. They're sending a message. Yeah. That's my thing.
Starting point is 01:26:04 All right, let's go. Let's do one more, and then we got to get out of here. Well, I know we talked on him. We talked on Jake Paul earlier, but he's calling everybody out. I think he's just calling anybody out that he can make some money. This was the most extreme version, but yeah, I think he called Kanye out just for fun. I think he's just like, I don't think Kanye is really going to fight. But that is his amazing knockout that would get him Connor.
Starting point is 01:26:26 That's the one you were talking about before. Oh, yeah. But nobody would even think Kanye has a chance. I think he needs to fight people that the people believe will beat him. Right. I think he has to be the underdog, in other words. It has to be an athlete. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:26:40 There's no entertainer that I think. No rapper. A hundred percent. This is interesting, though. Maybe we get out of here after this. The Cleveland Indians changing their mascot? Are they changing their name, too? I mean, they're going to be Cleveland, but they're not going to be the Indians anymore.
Starting point is 01:26:52 Ah. And after the next season, and then they're going to involve the fans to help them decide on the future name and branding. The fans are going to choose Indians. The fans love it. Everything but. It won't be one of the, yeah. They'll have probably like four choices or whatever. Right. I fans love it. Everything but. It won't be one of the, they'll have probably
Starting point is 01:27:05 like four choices or whatever. Right. I don't know. Yeah, they'll probably just do maybe a tribe and then change the mascot.
Starting point is 01:27:11 It's funny. I wonder if they just all go the, I mean, this is not, Europe didn't do this for a reason, but like with all
Starting point is 01:27:18 like the soccer teams in Europe, how they're just like Barcelona Football Club or FC Barcelona or Real Madrid. Washington Football Team. Washington Football Team, right? But I wonder if like there's no way they did it like Barcelona Football Club or FC Barcelona or Real Madrid. Like the Redskins. Washington football team.
Starting point is 01:27:26 Washington football team, right? But I wonder if like there's no way they did it because they're like, we should be woke and we don't want to be offensive with our mascots. But at the same time, it ended up really working out. Yeah. And nobody really cares. They still buy the jerseys, all that kind of shit. Like the mascot means nothing.
Starting point is 01:27:38 I don't know what a Yankee is. Yeah. Do you know what a Yankee is? Nope. Isn't that just a northerner? A northerner? But it probably was something. It had some sort of...
Starting point is 01:27:47 Yeah, the Lakers... It's in LA, but it's Minnesota for all the lakes. Yeah, the Jazz, same shit. Yeah, like the name means nothing. Like, yank it off. Who gives a fuck? I mean, it gives you an excuse to buy another jersey, I guess. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:27:59 And you're just trying to stay out of the fire. I think Washington only changed their name, the Redskins, after there was this big sexual harassment scandal. No, no, no. FedEx said that they were going to remove their sponsorship of the field. Yeah, I also think that. I think it was all in the same time period. You're wrong. FedEx said that they were going to remove their sponsorship of the field.
Starting point is 01:28:20 And the second the money was involved, they were like, oh, fuck. Okay, we're not going to have a field sponsor? Like, that's a big deal. That's revenue loss. But they never came up with another mascot, though, right? They're just the Washington football team. It's kind of lit. Yeah, I remember a dude,
Starting point is 01:28:35 I don't know if we brought this up, but I'm pretty sure LeBron was like, man, that name's whack or something like that. No, he didn't. I can't remember if it was him, but it was someone that was involved with a European soccer team. And literally the European soccer team, it might have been like Liverpool, but it was someone that was involved with a European soccer team. And literally the European soccer team.
Starting point is 01:28:46 It might have been like Liverpool, but it was Liverpool Football Club. Literally the same exact name. So it's like they've been doing it forever. But I just hate like the sponsors get to be the main thing. So it's like you're in airlines, like you're walking around advertising Etihad and Qatar Airways. You don't realize how corny that is until they started putting things on the NBA jerseys. Did you see that?
Starting point is 01:29:06 They're like, do this tiny little logo here and it looks so cheap. You're like, oh, you can't afford to have your own fucking jerseys. The only fire one is Orlando because it says Disney and no one's going to hate on the Disney logo. That's fire.
Starting point is 01:29:17 Okay, what else we got? Anything else? I'm trying to find this video. It's fucking hilarious of this dog that ate a bunch of edibles. Oh, no. Oh, that was so good oh no it's so good it's so funny oh no oh here we go the other thing is that uh that zodiac cipher we're
Starting point is 01:29:31 talking about and she was so smart in the video you'll hear that like she'll mention her doctor saying it just has to pass through so then you're allowed to just say and laugh and say this oh fuck the audio's not working damn it okay. Okay. Next time we go do it, but that dog is slumped. Looked like Nate Robinson. Yeah, okay. Lastly, and then we get out of here. They deciphered, you know the Zodiac Killer? Yes. They did that. I think Jake Gyllenhaal had a movie about it
Starting point is 01:29:58 or something like that, and they still haven't found out who the fuck this guy is. Some nerds figured out one of his ciphers. Like one that hadn't right some nerds figured out one of his ciphers like one that hadn't been able to be figured out for like 50 years or however long ago it happened did it help them track down who he is i don't think they've now the track it down who it is no but it's kind of crazy how these whole ciphers work i literally thought you just flipped a character for a letter right not only do to make it tricky do they flip a character for a letter, right? Not only do, to make it tricky,
Starting point is 01:30:27 do they flip a character for a letter, sometimes they'll have two different letters have the same character, or one character, sorry, one letter have two different characters, right? And not only do they write regular, sometimes they write diagonal, and sometimes they write backwards. Shit is like a crossword puzzle.
Starting point is 01:30:44 Yeah, and it's somehow this fucking guy i guess built it what was the deal he like built a he built some sort of a computer program to hack it oh yeah yeah so it's like this belgian warehouse worker that built a like crypto like it was basically like a cipher solving software yeah that was fire yeah and basically it just like takes the cipher and then gives you all the possible outcomes for what it could be just using a computer and he's got to go through and read all of them and he read a cipher was when black dude's repping a circle i'm trying to pretend i know where the cipher is it's at the note with the fucking magazine letters yeah yes yeah exactly sometimes it's not magazine letters sometimes it's his own characters that he'll do a triangle
Starting point is 01:31:23 for one or like a fucking baseball bat for another or something yeah and it's just the guy made these like really complex ciphers but they fucking uh they figured one out yeah didn't get him closer though everyone's like man they solved the zodiac cipher and then you read it it's like that wasn't me that called into the radio show last week that's all it was some bullshit all right great the annoying thing about that guy is is that the uh zodiac dude is other than the killing people yeah other than the killing obviously but uh is that i think they know who it was yeah they just didn't have enough proof to get him and i think the same thing goes with like jack the ripper have you guys read the stories about this like no like they they kind of had it pinned on one person right jewish dude right always
Starting point is 01:32:08 no but he was a doctor or something like that there was some weird thing so they had it pinned but they didn't have enough proof and i think one guy wouldn't uh wouldn't rat him out or one guy wouldn't say he wasn't there i know there's some like weird story about it but uh bro that that might be white privilege that really might be like considering i'm a ripper just how many like black dudes like get arrested and then like get coerced into a false confession and put in jail for 50 fucking years for some shit they didn't do yeah and then they there's a guy that killed 20 people and they're like oh you think we know who it is and then they just let him go you know i mean like it only happens to serial killers how often do you hear this they're like yeah like there's a pretty good chance you watch a documentary and
Starting point is 01:32:47 they're like all these clues point to this one guy and then they're like yeah let him run like what's the dude robert durst the yeah literally they have the confession of him he's like yeah i did it and then he's still like in trial it's up for like litigation or whatever like it's only the white serial killers they're like yeah we'll give him a break you know i mean he's a swimmer he's a good kid like i don't know so is that this we just see white dudes is too passive or something i don't know i with the fucking fred durst or whatever his name was limp biscuit dude i just assume they got the resources to fight it in trial yeah that's what it is and then
Starting point is 01:33:24 eventually the zodiac killer the zodiac they didn't even know the act the ripper was the act Let this kid do it. I just assume they got the resources to fight it in trial. Yeah, that's what it is. And then eventually you just- The Zodiac Killer? Yeah. The Zodiac- They didn't even know what the motherfucker was. Jack the Ripper's the first serial killer, right? Is that why he's famous? I assume.
Starting point is 01:33:33 That's the only reason I would- I'm like, that's the only reason he'd be famous for this long. Yeah, I never knew why he was that famous. And the most fire name, too. Yeah, Jack the Ripper. Fire, dog. Yeah. Apparently they do that shit i did
Starting point is 01:33:45 this like hollywood like murder mystery tour or whatever when i was out there okay and they said that like in london no no this was in la okay and they were like the the famous like murders that they're trying to solve the police will give like a catchy name and hopes to like build like interest around the story so like black Black Dahlia. Yeah. So it's like the police as well as like the media. Let's call them Black something then we'll catch them.
Starting point is 01:34:09 Yeah, exactly. Legit, bro. Black Dahlia is the one they mentioned. What is Black Dahlia? Son of Sam. Yeah, exactly. All that shit.
Starting point is 01:34:17 So they try to give them like this weird interesting name that people are interested in. It's basically like YouTube clickbait. They're like giving them these show killers clickbait names. They're giving them clickbait names that's not enough john logan yeah so they like give them kitschy names the black dahlia was like this chick that
Starting point is 01:34:35 like got murdered in la like near the hollywood sign and like it was like this ritual murder where like her body was cut in half and like her ovaries were missing or some crazy shit and then it was like this whole weird like ritual thing. When was this? It was like back in like the 60s, 70s. Oh, okay. This is done.
Starting point is 01:34:49 Here's a while ago. LA had a little weird run out there. They had a couple weird ones, dude. They did. The Melendez brothers. Melendez?
Starting point is 01:34:57 What about even Manson? Like what was happening out there? Everybody was doing drugs and being a failed actor. That's just a bad combo. Low key, was it the drugs?
Starting point is 01:35:06 My girl has a theory about that. Like, why all of a sudden you see, like, these serial killers pop up in the 80s, and it's like, these are the people that were doing all these hallucinogenics in the 70s. And, like, the lasting effects of that are, like... Completely believable.
Starting point is 01:35:22 Something like that. I don't know. There has to be some sort of connectivity between all of a sudden americans start experimenting with hallucinogenic drugs and then 10 years later x amount of years later all these serial killers are popping up it's not like serial killing exists outside of here are there's tons of serial killers in england like i don't see any serial killer shows jack jack the ripper they had one in the 1600s sherlock and luther after that. Sherlock and Luther, both BBC shows recently about serial killers. No, but I think the US also got obsessed with it. A lot of these serial killers have to do with the satanic rituals, the occult, witchcraft,
Starting point is 01:35:55 all this. And that was that whole sacrificing. That was St. Manson. Yeah. We're overdue for a good serial killer. Yeah, maybe. Maybe. I haven't seen aue for a good serial killer. Yeah, maybe. Maybe. I haven't seen a news article about any serial killers.
Starting point is 01:36:09 The last one I can remember was the ones in the van in D.C. or whatever. D.C. Sniper. Sniper motherfucker. Yeah, D.C. Sniper. That was a black dude, right? Hopefully people don't die, but we're overdue for a good serial killer. Yeah. Well, if anybody's listening, the time is now.
Starting point is 01:36:26 Anyway, look, we love you guys. We appreciate you guys, Gil. Yeah. Well, if anybody's listening, the time is now. Anyway, look, we love you guys. We appreciate you guys, man. Check out the Netflix special this week, man. We work really fucking hard at it. It comes out Tuesday at midnight. Thank you, my brother. And midnight Pacific Standard Time. So it's really Wednesday.
Starting point is 01:36:40 No, Thursday. Sorry. It comes out Thursday at midnight Pacific Standard Time so that's really Friday morning 3am did you know this? no it comes Wednesday at midnight so the late
Starting point is 01:36:56 late show Wednesday that becomes Thursday Thursday is the 17th it'll be like Thursday at 3am so on Thursday morning I'm pretty sure people will watch it. Or Thursday night. Thursday, as soon as you wake up. Man, that makes me feel so much better.
Starting point is 01:37:09 I didn't say that on Brilliant Idiots, though. So when I say Brilliant Idiots later this week, it is going to be out Thursday. Just know it's going to be out Thursday. Oh, that makes way more sense. Yep. Sense. That's why.
Starting point is 01:37:21 Okay. Smart is stupid as a motherfucker. Yeah, that's me, whatever. He brought the Brilliant Idiot to flagrant the brilliant idiot to flagrant bro it is what it is bro only on brilliant idiots only on a show called brilliant idiots could i fuck up the time that my own special bro i literally was asking i was like yo when's it coming he's like during the day sometime i think it's not during the day it never was during the day oh god that's what they meant by three Golly They were saying three
Starting point is 01:37:46 And I was thinking like Three in the afternoon But I guess they were saying Three in the morning Oh yeah yeah Yamadigatsi Alright Alright guys
Starting point is 01:37:57 We love you The special is much smarter than this I promise Don't Don't worry We're good Go check it Shell States America
Starting point is 01:38:04 Oh and also We will be back Obviously every Friday don't worry we're good go check it show states america oh and also we will be back obviously every friday at patreon.com slash flagrant 2 number one comedy patreon in the world
Starting point is 01:38:12 that's cool you know every single friday we are there with a new episode so we will be there um and if you wanna come fuck with us
Starting point is 01:38:19 come fuck with us man we'd love to have you over there and if not now then I think in the future trust believe we'll see you there thanks again peace

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