Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - Just The Tip ft. Trevor Wallace

Episode Date: November 12, 2019

This week Andrew, Akaash, Kaz, and special guest Trevor Wallace discuss: the end of tipping, the worst thing about NYC, Dion Waiters having too many edibles, Drake getting booed at a concert, making i...t on social media, KSI vs Logan Paul II, and much more. INDULGE!!! Want an additional episode every week? Become a Patron! www.Patreon.com/Flagrant2

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Starting point is 00:00:00 What's up everybody Welcome to another episode of Flagrant 2 No easy buckets My name is Andrew Schultz I'm here with Akash Singh Real Life Kaz Alex Media Eden
Starting point is 00:00:14 On the ones and twos This episode is brought to you by MatchMyDrip.com I already like the name of that website MatchMyDrip.com Y'all gotta go name of that website. Matchmydrip.com. Y'all got to go check it out. Go to the website right now. Check it out.
Starting point is 00:00:28 They're a company. They make t-shirts for sneaker heads, for all the hype beast kicks out there, the sneaker enthusiasts. They basically make these t-shirts that are matching all these sneakers that you probably have or the sneakers that you want to have. Yeezys, Off-White, Jordan, Nike. If you have any drip, you need the tees to match. You go to matchmydrip.com, okay, or it's at underscore matchmydrip on Instagram.
Starting point is 00:00:55 And the promo code is flagrant, obviously, and you get 25% off your whole order. Check out Alex. Alex got one of the shirts on right now. Yeah, it's hot. Look at that beauty and diversity right there. Oh, I like it. Be diverse with your sneakers. Like that shit.
Starting point is 00:01:12 You got all the... Oh, really? All right. Damn, Al. They asked me what sneakers I have and they made them. Oh, and they're making custom shit too. Ooh, okay. Well, look, yo, so all the shirts are custom, or they have some that are actual.
Starting point is 00:01:26 I'm sure they have ones that are pre-made. Yo, all I'm saying is go to matchmydrip.com. These guys are asshole army of vets, so keep it tight. Support the army. Support the cause. You know, they connected with Al, so Al connected him with Flager Media Group. Shouts to Jameel, and we made some business happen.
Starting point is 00:01:44 It's beautiful when that shit stays in-house like that. So I love it. I love it. I love it. Yo, let's start the show, man. Real quick, if you're tuning into this show right now because you saw our guest, we have a great guest this week, Trevor Wallace. That interview is after this section of the show. And you know what I'll probably do is I'll probably tell you when that will start when we know.
Starting point is 00:02:06 We're recording this one right now, so I don't know how long this is. But why don't you tune the fuck in for this as well. Trevor's a great guy, really understands new media. He's killing it out there. And I wanted to sit down with him. And we did that at the end of this episode. But right now we're going to get this flagrancy started. Akash Singh, right off of a
Starting point is 00:02:25 a hot headlining weekend how you feeling my friend so dope man so dope san diego sold out yeah this was my first time selling out like one of the club clubs like not something i booked on my own or something i went back home for yeah and a real club out the door yeah room in uh in san diego man and it was cool because assumed, and it was still mainly assholes, but there's more and more people that are like, oh, I saw you from your YouTube. And then you can tell them about the podcast because they're like, what's that sign everybody's throwing up? And it was cool to just have people coming out from, like,
Starting point is 00:02:56 one older black dude was like, let me ask you a question. And he was kind of aggressive. I was like, what's up? And he was like, you talking about R. Kelly? Just like, and that was fun. And then Tempe, Tempe I booked pretty late, so I didn't, on a Sunday, I didn't think that many people would come out. Tempe is like a suburb of Phoenix, Arizona, anybody who's listening, but they got a great
Starting point is 00:03:15 comedy club, the Tempe Improv. Great comedy club. It's the best I've been treated at a comedy club ever, probably. But then a good number of people came out that were super fun last night. Just everybody came out. Sorry to miss the Trevor interview. It's all good. But yo, so fun, man.
Starting point is 00:03:30 Thank you to everybody who came out. Just like a cool thing to see a building coming together. It's dope, man. It's good to see you, man. Congratulations. You were anti-social earlier this year. Now look at you.
Starting point is 00:03:39 I know, I know. It took a lot of work. It took a full intervention, but we out of here. The fire has been lit. You're running with it. I like seeing it happen. What else you got coming up, Akash?
Starting point is 00:03:47 Where can they see you? You heard about them sellouts, so get them tickets early. This Thursday, tickets are still available for Hartford, Connecticut at the Funny Bone. That's this Thursday. After that, let me look it up. I am in Mumbai the 20th and 21st at the Habitat Comedy Club. Then in the new year, I am at Hilarities in Cleveland on January 9th. The Stress Factory in New Brunswick.
Starting point is 00:04:09 Thank you for that. Yo, I've heard about this. Hilarities in Cleveland. We did that, Al. That is such a fun room. Really? It's a really good room. Yeah, and it's massive.
Starting point is 00:04:22 I mean, I don't know, what, 400? Foreign changes. Maybe foreign changes. Come through, assholes. It's what, 400? Four and change it. Maybe four and change it. Come through, assholes. It's a big room. They gave me one of their nights. It's supposed to be like their off night, just like see what you can do. So assholes, come through.
Starting point is 00:04:31 Let's murder this shit. Yo, pull up, man. Nice. So yeah, there then, Stress Factory on January 14th in New Brunswick. Love the Stress Factory, man. Shouts out to Philly. And the next day, Philly, hometown of my wifey, come through, you monsters. January 15th.
Starting point is 00:04:47 Which club are you doing at? Helium Comedy Club. That's good, man. Good shit. Go check all that out. I got to give a shout out to the History Hyenas podcast. Give it up. Yanni Papi, Chrissy D.
Starting point is 00:04:57 And they had a live show at Gramercy Theater in New York. So they sold out the Gramercy Theater in New York. That's a really big accomplishment you know um it's just really cool to see what they're building and uh you know I love it I love it when good guys when good things happen to good guys man so keep on supporting us they're good dudes man I love them and um so yeah and Kaz what do you got going on man what else happening oh shit I'm doing something really cool with Pepsi tomorrow and the New York Jets. I can't divulge it all the way, but you'll see it at the end of the week.
Starting point is 00:05:29 It's really tight. Just did a great interview with the New York Post and Big Apple Buckets with Jamal Crawford today, which is really awesome. Still not on a team. Still not on a team. We talked about that a lot, which is really cool. But he was a great talk. Obviously, December 13th, Ducey palooza brooklyn new york tickets are flying we haven't even announced the fucking headliners yet but when we do
Starting point is 00:05:49 we're trying to we're trying to sell that place out man if we sell out barclays man come through sell out barclays that's so wild please bro like i'm trump we're we're gonna we're gonna make that we're gonna make history what would be the number to sell out barclays i think it's uh 17 000 i think around there it's in there but be the number to sell out Barclays? I think it's 17,000, I think, around there. Wow, man. If y'all sell out Barclays without having anybody perform, that is the greatest hustle in the history of the world. But we got people performing.
Starting point is 00:06:13 We got some big names coming. I'm still trying to figure this shit out, man. They think Creflo Dollar is hustling, man. Let me tell you, Ducey Palooza is the greatest hustle because you go and you actually enjoy it. Yeah, that's the difference between a good time. What the fuck am I enjoying this so much? That's the difference between this and Creflo Dollar.
Starting point is 00:06:29 You ever watch Creflo Dollar? Creflo make you feel like you're going to get rich, bro. There's a reason why he got a plane, bro. He makes you feel guilty. Who? Creflo? Yeah. Does he?
Starting point is 00:06:38 I was never moved by Creflo. Nah, him and what you call him? I don't know why I'm acting like I've seen him. What's the guy with the big teeth that smiles all the time? Why did I even say that? Steve Harvey. Steve Harvey. No, not Steve Harvey. Oh, shit. I'm acting like I've seen him. What's the guy with the big teeth that smiles all the time? Why did I even say that? Steve Harvey. The white dude, the white Kerfloe. What's his name? Oh, Joel Osteen.
Starting point is 00:06:52 Joel Osteen makes you feel away, bro. Joel Osteen makes you go, hey, maybe they didn't need shelter. They live in Houston, they can swim. Just give yourself to Christ. I'm like dude Yo man Joel also knows what he's doing He's a hustler man
Starting point is 00:07:07 Shout out to Joel bro Shout out to Joel You know what I mean I mean maybe God Maybe that's what Why do we act like God Don't like money Maybe God likes money bro
Starting point is 00:07:15 Maybe we got it wrong God wants you to thrive dog Yeah God God don't want you to be broke What God would want you to be broke Oh God Be good with the money Do good with the money
Starting point is 00:07:22 Help some people out Yeah I don't see why not I don't see why not why would god want you to struggle i think if you're hoarding i think if you're a billionaire and like yo we gotta stop this billionaire hate if you're paying your your your fucking billionaire hate yo i hate billionaire hate listen i'm not saying i don't want to be a billionaire i'd love to be one that's the thing Everybody hate a billionaire Until they become one Like this goofy bitch
Starting point is 00:07:45 Elizabeth Warren Is all like She's so fucking goofy yo And this dumbass She's doing this whole Listen Whatever Let's just get into it
Starting point is 00:07:55 So she's doing this whole like Billionaire's gotta go I think so Yeah it's a flakethought You think so? This bitch gotta go This might be This bitch gotta go
Starting point is 00:08:02 This bitch gotta go She looks like an old boxer, bro. She looks like a journeyman boxer. Get a picture up of this chick, yo. She's been punching the head far too many times to run for president. If you look at her face in this picture, tell me she don't look like she's been boxing. Look at that face right there. Yo, you know who she kind of looks like?
Starting point is 00:08:18 She kind of has a lot of Teddy Atlas in her face. She kind of looks like the great- She's Teddy Atlas? She's got a little Teddy Atlas in her face. Don't she look like, what was that movie uh mickey ward she looked like mickey ward dog remember the fighter who in the wrestler but he made him no no no that's mickey roark mickey ward fought your work looks like shit look at oh my god that's elizabeth warren that's hilarious it's the same person to me she looked like tweety birth grandma speaking of billionaires so real
Starting point is 00:08:44 quick so here you have this chick right Tweety birth grandma Speaking of billionaires So real quick So here you have This chick right here Is talking about All this billionaires Billionaires are the problem You know how much money This bitch made last year
Starting point is 00:08:51 $900,000 So she's a millionaire Right She got a shit on billionaires Because that's the only way To make herself relatable To the poor motherfuckers In the world
Starting point is 00:09:03 You not You are way closer to billionaire than you are to poor person. Stop talking about the working class. Stop talking about all this shit. This is the shit that just fucking riles me up. There's no rule that you can't pay more
Starting point is 00:09:17 in taxes. If you go, hey, US government, I know it's only 30%, but here's 50% because I believe in it. Yeah. Is she doing that? No. Bill Gates does that.
Starting point is 00:09:28 That's why I fuck with Bill Gates. Bill Gates don't do that. Don't believe Bill Gates. Bill Gates became a billionaire. He became a billionaire from making something actually fucking useful to the world. He made Word docs and Excel sheets and shit. I can fuck with that. But if you're a billionaire off of like-
Starting point is 00:09:43 You know how they say 1% of America has 50% of the wealth or whatever? Who cares about the actual numbers? I bet if you compare the amount of tax that each pays, the 1% pays less in actual tax dollars than everybody else. Can I tell you something? Because they find a way around every tax law. Of course they do. And here's the thing I'm trying to understand, right?
Starting point is 00:10:01 Of course they do. And here's the thing I'm trying to understand, right? The 1% of everything is always the best. For example, like 1% of people that are good at basketball play it in the NBA. Does that mean we should get rid of the NBA? Or they should give back half their careers to shittier players? Do you know what I'm saying? I see the point you're trying to make. 1% of musicians
Starting point is 00:10:26 are the ones that get a Grammy or make real money. The other 99.9% We're 1% of the entertainment business. Real talk, we're 1% of the entertainment business. But furthermore, the 1% model is how every business functions. 1%
Starting point is 00:10:43 of sword fighters are still alive. Maybe that's a bad example, but 1% of sword fighters are still alive. Maybe that's a bad example, but 1% of magicians are making money. The rest of them are on a fucking carnival cruise, right? I hear you. So like what? Why are we doing this? We hate the 1% shit, but we know that's how it functions in every other thing.
Starting point is 00:10:57 Stats can make you believe anything. That's the reason why I hate stats. Stats can make you literally believe anything. Yeah, numbers lie is a lie. Numbers always fucking lie. Numbers be lying like a motherfucker. Numbers lie more than any cheating ass bitch in the world.
Starting point is 00:11:09 That's facts. That's facts. Right, so there's something like- Numbers like a Kardashian, yo. You can't trust them for nothing.
Starting point is 00:11:14 But that's what they do. They get you to believe. Motherfuckers just say shit and then you believe it because it sounds right. Do you know what I'm saying? Like, I don't know if we even spoke about this, but about how like they about how they made up that fucking lie that a man's G-spot is in his asshole.
Starting point is 00:11:31 Do you know that? Yeah, that is a lie. That's fake. That's an absolute fucking lie. That's gays made that up and women. So they could fuck your asshole and put their fingers in it. They thought that shit was cute. Son, I asked a doctor.
Starting point is 00:11:42 I was like, yo, and that's an awkward question to ask a doctor. A male G-spot in your butthole. I was like, yo, is it true to male G-spots in your asshole? Nah, that's just your colon. They're just pushing it. Son, it's not even your colon. It's your prostate. And you do have liquid come out,
Starting point is 00:12:00 but it's your prostate juice. It's not cum. It's prostate juice So there's no sperm in it So there's dudes out here Getting their asses fingered Trying to front like They just wanted to get
Starting point is 00:12:10 Their ass fingered Yes They just wanted an excuse I get it But stop But they say The male G-spot's in the asshole No it's not
Starting point is 00:12:18 No it's not That's fucked up A woman can't tell The difference between What's cum and what's colon What's prostate Prostate juice Prostate puss.
Starting point is 00:12:25 I mean, I think the extraction methods are pretty different. I would hope so. I mean, shit. How you gonna take? Stop taking fingers in your ass for mythology. Stop hating 1%. I only want a finger in my ass one time in my life, and that's going to see
Starting point is 00:12:41 the motherfucking doctor. What's the fucking name? The proctologist. The proctologist there you go son patrice and i had the best joke about that shit he was like he goes man we don't see the doctor man i would rather my prostate be hanging out my ass than actually go to the doctor matter of fact my prostate would be hanging out my ass for two weeks i call my boy like yo yeah i just got a duct tape up there should i do something about this before I actually go to the doctor? It's so true. Bros, bro.
Starting point is 00:13:08 All I'm trying to say is that that shit got me riled up, man, about this. I guess there's only one way to punch. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Like, there's only one way to punch is up. And when you're that close, like, when you're a millionaire and you're a billionaire, like, there really ain't that much of a difference in lifestyle.
Starting point is 00:13:22 How much extra shit can you buy? How many more cars do you need? Exactly. You got the car. How big a house do you need? And then she, I just, it's just,
Starting point is 00:13:28 you know what it is? I mean, fraudulence drives me fucking crazy. Yeah. And I think that's what people, I think that's why people overlook a lot of shit about Trump because they're like, at least he's not fucking lying to my face like I'm an idiot.
Starting point is 00:13:47 Yeah. Right? Or he's lying so blatantly that it's like- Yeah, I was about to say, that's a lie. That's hilarious. It's more of that. That's kind of where I... Not I fuck with Trump, but I'm just like- Because he doesn't lie about his shittiness.
Starting point is 00:14:01 For example- There's a small part of me that's going to miss him when he's not president no more, just because of the antics. Yeah. And just knowing that he just lies so much, and he's just so fucking... He, like, you ever think of the motherfucker when it's like, yo, this is the guy with the nuclear codes, right? If this motherfucker really had them shits, he'd be tweeting about that shit all the fucking
Starting point is 00:14:21 time. But he doesn't, because he doesn't have that thing in him that most people have where it's like, oh my God, you can't say that. You can't say that. He just fucking says it. You know what I think
Starting point is 00:14:29 it is about Trump? At least his goofy bitch-lism with Warren ain't got the fucking nuclear code probably bombing Mark Cuban and all the rest of the billionaires
Starting point is 00:14:35 in America. You know what I think it is? We don't want to feel deceived. Yeah. Even if Trump lies, we know who Trump is. We know. He's such an overt, ridiculous liar. Yeah. Even if Trump lies, we know who Trump is. We know. He's such an overt, ridiculous liar.
Starting point is 00:14:46 Yeah. Warren talking all this shit about everybody else, and you make $900,000 a year, and you're 116th Native American, and you're hustling that to get scholarships. Like, you're just like me. Yeah. Don't pretend you're some shit. Like, don't try to deceive me. Trump is like, it's almost like a special ed kid lying or something.
Starting point is 00:15:04 You're like, what the hell is a special aid kid line or something. This is cute. But what is he, okay, put it, I don't want this to seem like a defend Trump thing. What I'm trying to defend is like, I'm trying to explain why people are drawn to him opposed to these other figures. We don't like people that
Starting point is 00:15:20 front like they're better than they are. Correct. Right? Like, one of the reasons this show is great is because we don't come in here with moral standards. Oh, we'll never disappoint you. That's the best thing about Flavor 2. We'll talk our shit. You'll never read something
Starting point is 00:15:36 in the blog like, damn, that doesn't sound like my Andrew Ock. I was like, oh no, we're all pieces of shit. What are they really going to say about us in the blog? They said something racist on the show. Shocking. Find the episode where we didn't. That's the news story.
Starting point is 00:15:50 Put that on the New York Times. Yo, one episode they didn't make fun of Chinese. So the thing about, because I was watching this. Did you see Donald Trump Jr. on The View? Yeah. I heard, I listened to it. He got a book. He got a book. He got a book,
Starting point is 00:16:06 but there was like this big, like this big old thing. And one thing I realized about Trump and now about Trump Jr. And it's way more obvious in Trump Jr. than it is Trump because he's not as good at it. Right? But this is what Trump knows
Starting point is 00:16:20 that never was seen before in politicians. He knows they're all scumbags. They're the biggest scumbags of the world. They're all sociopaths. No, no, no. You could be a sociopath and not hurt people. Every one of them is a sociopath that hurts people. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:40 That has personally affected the lives of millions of people. Yeah. Right? So he knows that. So when any of them talk shit, he's chomping at the bit. He's like, I've been giving you money under the table for 40 years. What are you going to say? You're going to say I'm crazy.
Starting point is 00:16:59 You're going to say I'm corrupt. Like when they said, you don't think when they said the Ukraine shit about him him he was like oh word joe you want to play this game well you got your son making 80 grand a year a month working for this this this ukrainian company he don't even speak russian or ukrainian he don't understand anything about what you want to talk about me in ukraine so so his whole strategy is you talk shit about me i'm not even going to defend me i'm going to show how you ain't shit you don't need to defend show how you ain't shit. You don't need to defend yourself if you ain't shit. It's like when your girl goes, why'd you like that picture?
Starting point is 00:17:34 And you be like, yeah, but remember when you liked fucking The Rock's picture? Why you got to like The Rock? That sounds personal. Do you know what I'm saying? We all been there. We all been there. Trust me, I've been there. But do you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:17:43 Yeah. He got dirt on everybody. Like the president of the United States. The junior is on The View, and these girls are going at him, and he just goes, we're really going to talk about civility? He goes, Joy Behar, you wore blackface. Whoopi, you defended. He goes, whoopi, you defended Roman Polanski. You said, it wasn't rape rape about a 15-year-old girl that was raped. Now, I would love to hear that clip. Yeah. That being said, it wasn't rape rape about a 15-year-old girl that was raped. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:05 Now, I would love to hear that clip. Yeah. That being said, what they gonna say? What they melt? He said this live on the show. Live!
Starting point is 00:18:14 Oh, I gotta watch this. Son, it's wild! It's not as good as you think it'd be because they're all talking over each other like everybody's so eager to go at him.
Starting point is 00:18:22 Son. He handles that shit pretty well though to be honest with you. Real talk, look how many people that are there talk Look how many people there are there Look how many people there are in this room We barely talk to each other
Starting point is 00:18:28 You put six girls in the same room The difference It's women That's what I'm saying They don't understand You could never have No They literally have a bell there
Starting point is 00:18:37 To stop them from talking You were Ding ding ding Yeah yeah yeah It's not brunch I should have tried that at home So That's the ba-ba-ba.
Starting point is 00:18:45 That's where I got it from. They got to treat them like cats. Dinner's ready. It's just something so refreshing about being ain't shit. Oh, yeah. Openly ain't shit. Openly ain't shit. I wanted to buy the domain, I ain't shit dot com.
Starting point is 00:19:03 That's me, yo. You ain't never going to see me pretending I'm't shit dot com That's me yo You ain't never gonna see me Pretending I'm a good person Bro I just And I think that's what We finally reached Like a fever pitch with Is as like the PC
Starting point is 00:19:12 Woke shit got crazy And hit mainstream culture Cause there have always been Like woke people This has always existed This is not new Always will be And there always will be
Starting point is 00:19:21 But they were a little bit more Of like a fringe group Right And then once it became Mainstream We were a little bit more of like a fringe group, right? And then once it became mainstream, we were like- You know what it was? Hold on. You think- Wait, you think you're really going to go on TV and act like you ain't shit like me?
Starting point is 00:19:35 The audacity of you. And then Trump comes over. He's like, yo, them Mexicans be raping. And then people at home be like, some probably rape. You know what I'm saying? Motherfucker. Like, you start justifying. You be like, probably rape you know what I'm saying motherfucker like you start justifying you be like Hector raped
Starting point is 00:19:49 remember Hector remember Hector in high school that motherfucker was raping you know what I mean I said that in the Arizona show I was like
Starting point is 00:19:56 I saw some people from Oregon so I was like oh you guys are the white people who actually like Mexicans and then I was like in Arizona's defense you don't really
Starting point is 00:20:04 got a deal like Mexicans. And then I was like, in Arizona's defense, you don't really got to deal with Mexicans. They got a different perspective and they be dealing with them out there in Arizona. In Arizona. They be building walls. Yeah. And I was like, maybe Mexicans is just that annoying. You don't know, you in Oregon.
Starting point is 00:20:20 Son, it's this shit that we always do. It's like this, like New York and California people like low key let me tell you why I'm the hypocrite I don't care about global warming right
Starting point is 00:20:32 because it ain't gonna affect me like all this like the sea's gonna override and everything it's like where where that gonna happen that not gonna happen to me
Starting point is 00:20:42 right it doesn't so it doesn't really pertain to my life that much. Right. But I can admit I ain't shit. Right. I can say on a podcast to hundreds of thousands of people, I don't care about the-
Starting point is 00:20:54 Own who you are. Fucking Eskimos. Own who you are. I've never seen one Eskimo. Why should I care? Son, why should- You know how racist they are? They probably think you're a fucking bear, bro.
Starting point is 00:21:04 They don't know. The grizzly is coming. They have like 10 words for snow and bear and shit. Son, they're wearing you as a fur, bro. Fuck Eskimos, bro. Here's my one question about taxing billionaires. Is the solution for the country, let me give this money to the government. They're going to use it well.
Starting point is 00:21:27 Son. Like, that's your big fucking answer? Real talk? Just give more money to you? You couldn't be right. You couldn't be more right. You couldn't be more right.
Starting point is 00:21:33 You couldn't be more right. This the answer, huh? Son. The least efficient, most bureaucratic organization in the entire country. Yeah. Let's give them all the money
Starting point is 00:21:41 and see what happens. The motherfuckers that run the MTA. We already in debt. You run the MTA. How already in debt. You run the MTA. How does traffic on a train? Doug. It's just one. It's just one lane.
Starting point is 00:21:53 How you got traffic when it goes one way? I ain't got too many cars. I don't know why I just put on this shit. I'm going crazy. I'm not even going to speak on the logistics of it. Here's what I know, though. I moved to New York 10 years ago. It was $82 a month for a subway pass.
Starting point is 00:22:07 Now it's like $115. Service has gotten worse. Costs have gone up like 30%, 40%. So if service gets worse and you're charging me more money, why would I trust you with more money? But they got those cute little Apple Pay things now. I'm not going to lie. The Apple Pay kind of lit.
Starting point is 00:22:23 Apple Pay kind of lit. But I will say this. An incredible point about the astonishing increase in price in the last fucking 10 years. And they're going broke still. They're still going broke. Let me ask you this. If we were on a fucking chairlift skiing, right, and the chairlift people said, hold on, there's a little traffic on the chairlift. Right? You'd be like, what you mean there's a little traffic on the chairlift. Right?
Starting point is 00:22:45 You'd be like, what you mean is traffic? It's just one thing. It just goes up and it comes down. It can't be traffic because it just goes up and it comes down. Right? Like that would be the answer, right? You cannot physically have traffic because it's just one. Whenever I see traffic, it's when four lanes turn into two.
Starting point is 00:23:04 Yeah, but you always have There's more people The What's it called Ski lift or whatever Ski lift Who doesn't know how to get off The fucking thing
Starting point is 00:23:12 Yeah And then they have to stop it Because that motherfucker Falls right at the spot And they're smart And they stop the whole shit Yeah They don't let the whole shit go
Starting point is 00:23:19 And then it backs up And then we got 14 lifts About to go And then more accidents happen Yeah so that's what Trade traffic is That's what they should do. Stop the whole shit.
Starting point is 00:23:26 So what, did they just stop the train? Did they just close the door and be like, yo, you can't swipe it? Remember when we were young and we had the little train tracks and you had the little cars set up on the train tracks? There was traffic there? You ain't never, you never in your life were playing with your train tracks and you were like, mom! Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:23:44 It's too much traffic how simple you can make sound without making any sense at all what i'm saying is you have to be next level retarded to make traffic on yo when the guy on the mic goes there's a little traffic ahead how how is there traffic ahead let me guess how many trains is ahead one because that's how many could fit it makes me go fucking crazy how many like how could there be traffic guys look look ready look there's there's two there's one track and there's only yeah let's do a visual ready there's one track, and there's only, yeah, let's do a visual. Ready?
Starting point is 00:24:26 There's one track, right? Here's one train. There's traffic ahead. You telling me we got that? You telling me we got one on top of the other? Is that what managed to happen? Did we manage at Union Square to get two four trains on top of each other? Because otherwise it's impossible to have traffic.
Starting point is 00:24:46 It's not possible. When they say it, I go crazy. When they say it, I lose my fucking mind. When they say they want to knock on the door, I go prove it. Prove it. Show me a picture of the traffic. I want to see a picture
Starting point is 00:25:02 of a bunch of guys in the front of the traffic like all the train drivers. Come on, let's go. Beep, beep. Come on. Son, this is how you know there's no traffic. They ain't got horns on the train. Because the people who made the train, that's emergency.
Starting point is 00:25:17 I'm talking about beep, beep. They don't got beep, beep. They ain't got no beep, beep. Let me tell you why they ain't got no beep, beep. Because the people who made trains knew there wasn't going to be no fucking traffic. Right? They probably asked him, like, yo, should we put a BB? He goes, how could there be traffic?
Starting point is 00:25:32 It's one fucking lane. And then these retards managed to find a way to make traffic. Make traffic authority. That's what MTA stands for. That's what it stands for. Make traffic authority. Oh, my God. How you manage to make traffic.
Starting point is 00:25:52 Yo. It's like if a movie started late at the movie theater. Just press play. Just pause. Pause. What time the movie starts? It's our eight? Hey, guess what you do at eight?
Starting point is 00:26:01 Play. I'm sorry. The movie's running a little late. Take your finger and press play. And then it's on time. Yo, you had a lot of flavor. It takes just a minute to go, son. What the fuck?
Starting point is 00:26:14 And if we let this goofy bitch Elizabeth Warren run the fucking MTA. If this bitch out here running the MTA. Just imagine. Just imagine what's going to happen. Yo, you know what blew my mind? I was supposed to do Brilliant Idiots one time. I got stuck on the train for 50 minutes in the middle of the track between 18th Street and 23rd Street. That's five blocks.
Starting point is 00:26:37 The idea, somebody got hit by a train, so they stopped everything. Okay, fine. You can't take us to the next stop and let everybody off the train. You got to hold us there for 50 minutes. Yo. And trapped. You can't walk
Starting point is 00:26:49 in between subway cars. I was about to say, were you in between the stops? This diabetic had to piss in a fucking milk jug because he couldn't even go into the middle of the pee. And he brought up
Starting point is 00:26:59 that he was diabetic too when it had nothing to do with peeing. Yeah, I think they got to pee a lot if they're diabetic. Really? What? I think so, yeah. I thought they just can't eat syrup. That's what I thought. I thought it was do with peeing. He just wanted to pee on you. Yeah, I think they gotta pee a lot if they diabetic. Really? What? I think so, yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:06 I thought they just can't eat syrup. That's what I thought. Alex, you're the- I thought it was just- I forgot. Alex, you're our female doctor. Nah, you a fucking doctor, Alex. You diabetic?
Starting point is 00:27:12 You know about this shit. No, he's a doctor. He's a nurse. I'm a female doctor. He's a female doctor. Yeah, yeah. You're a nurse. Also known as a.
Starting point is 00:27:20 You're a big nurse. Son, so they stop the fucking trains, right? Yeah. When somebody jumps in the track. How many people need to jump in a train track The big murse. Son, so they stop the fucking trains, right? When somebody jumps in the track. How many people need to jump in a train track before we just put a little something? It's not even a lot. London got a little something. Son, they don't let you go in.
Starting point is 00:27:34 No. Right? They don't let you go in. So, look at, ready? Look at, ready? Literally, all it is, it's literally only this. It's not even that crazy. Screen.
Starting point is 00:27:47 Yeah. It's a screen door. It's a screen door. Just put it across the whole tracks. Then we don't have any excuse to be late. You're severely underestimating the ingenuity of crackheads. Son, crackheads want to live so they can do more crack. When they ever tried to die.
Starting point is 00:28:02 Honestly, I don't really care if crackheads get it. I'm talking about human beings. If a crackhead had to go, that's fine. Yo, these people, the fucking boss. If a few crackheads got to die. No, no, no. We got to talk about this. How dare you, as a New Yorker, jump in front of a subway to kill yourself?
Starting point is 00:28:20 Yeah, that's a little selfish. That is the most selfish fucking way. All these buildings you could jump out of And nobody would fucking care And their day wouldn't be ruined But the fact that you Want to take your life And then ruin my fucking day Oh my god
Starting point is 00:28:33 Like maybe you should die Because these types of people That are that selfish They don't need to be around At least do it at night When the trains come Like every ten minutes and shit You know when you could do it?
Starting point is 00:28:44 During rush hour? How about this The last train That's going to Williamsburg to L Before that shit shut down for Saturday At least do it at night when the trains come like every 10 minutes and shit. You know when you could do it? During rush hour? How about this? The last train that's going to Williamsburg to L before that shit shut down for Saturday, Sunday. Kill yourself on that one. We got to have certain times where you could go. But this idea, like literally think of the type of person that jumps in front of the train track. They got peak hours, off peak, and suicide hours.
Starting point is 00:29:03 We need suicide hours. We need suicide hours. Off peak, suicide hours. It's not like you don't see all of us, right? You don't see all of us? I'm down for a suicide hamsterdam. I'm all right with that shit. What's a suicide hamsterdam? You're a hamsterdam on the wire.
Starting point is 00:29:13 Oh, for the wire. Yeah, suicide hamsterdam. Y'all just do the shit in a way that's controlled, and you don't get in anybody else's way. Get up out of here. It's all good. I don't know how y'all still do the train. I've bought every possible way guys still do the train. I've bought every
Starting point is 00:29:26 possible way not to take the train. I have a bike, electrical scooter, a car. I mean, days like today, though. Because you had the parking privilege. You got the parking privilege, one. You asked the question. I answered it. I'm supposed to shut up. I still got a bicycle and an electric
Starting point is 00:29:41 scooter. I'm not getting on the train. I haven't got on the train. Tell them how Alex does the train. I haven't got on the train. We can't ride an electric scooter for years. Tell him how Alex parked. This is what Alex does to park. This is the most hilarious shit ever. He puts a black power fist in his windshield like that. And then I walk out with 20 tickets.
Starting point is 00:29:54 And then he just walks out. That's it. More tickets? Yes. This is a black car. Call that shit. He literally just gets beaten as soon as he gets out of the car nightclubs all of a sudden hit him in the back of the head don't make no sense you're black so we need to
Starting point is 00:30:13 when was the last time you saw a white cop damn it is going extinct what y'all see white cops do i word all the time you kidding me that's how you know kids getting money yo Jersey Sunday got black people there seems like you see motherfuckers wearing green they got one of them sombrero like Rangers nature right you on the highway fam you're not in nature. Why they got them whole shits with the little... There's not a black person in my neighborhood, bro. There isn't?
Starting point is 00:30:50 You made it, son. I love it. Damn, bro. I love it. One day I'm going to get there. Kid, move over. But now I'm going to deal with these black people. I've done enough of you unwords for one lifetime, goddammit.
Starting point is 00:31:06 I will see y'all back in Harlem. When I see a new black couple moving into the building, I'll be side-eyed. Yo, don't you fuck this up for me. Son, son. I've done the same thing. I've done the same thing, yo. I'll be like, oh, yeah, I guess 20% is rank control.
Starting point is 00:31:24 I'll be like, oh, yeah, I guess 20% is rank control. I'm like, I want to be the only one. Oh, man. Y'all don't know the privilege. The privilege of walking around. I don't know if that's the black people on the block. I saw some black folks walking across, walking their dog in front of my porch the other day. God, I turned so conservative for like five seconds. I'm like,
Starting point is 00:31:47 who are these new niggas? I'm like, I'm supposed to know this type of shit. You knock on a white guy's door like, what is happening to the neighborhood? God damn. You know they did that when I moved in. They're like, yo, who is this? But now you're trusted. They're still doing that shit. They're still doing that shit to me, God damn it.
Starting point is 00:32:04 Ken's got a new neighbor every month. He can't figure out why. Everybody in your neighborhood is slowly moving out. You realize every black person that moves in is because a white person moved out and they saw you, right? When did they build a chicken shack here? Kaz is de-gentrified. I love it. I just went to my place. Not a single-gentrified. I love it. I didn't even
Starting point is 00:32:25 come to my place. Not a single black person around there. It's beautiful. There's going to be a Kennedy fried chicken in your neighborhood in no time, bro.
Starting point is 00:32:31 Oh, dude, that's it. He's starting to sell back what's at the Home Depot. I came over there and they started thinking he's going to start mowing everybody's lawn and shit.
Starting point is 00:32:39 Were they handing you cards and shit where they're like, we would like your services over here too? No, no, no, no bullshit. Oh, no. Wow, dude.
Starting point is 00:32:48 I saw more cats than black people. You saw more cats than black people? Yeah, lots of cats. Lots of cats in the neighborhood. You have a catty neighborhood? Yeah, like they just let their cats just roam free. They're owned and shit, but they just go back home at the end of the night. What?
Starting point is 00:33:00 Yeah. Very pet friendly. That is a white thing to let your animals roam. Yeah, they just roam. They know where to go. That's why we're the only ones that get Lyme disease. They look at me like I'm not supposed to be there. Black people don't get Lyme disease.
Starting point is 00:33:12 No. Except that one guy from- Because they don't fuck with nature, really. Yeah, one guy from the real world. What the fuck are you going to the forest for? Hiking? What is hiking? Hiking, this is what hiking is.
Starting point is 00:33:21 It's getting as far away from minorities as you can. Just go to the beach. That's one version of it. Swimming, hiking. You got to go to the beach and get in the water. You can't just hang out on the sand. Any ING sport is getting away from y'all. That's us.
Starting point is 00:33:38 Skiing, snowboarding, hiking, swimming, kayaking. We took skateboarding from y'all, though. Y'all really are doing that, and it's bothering me. And it's fucking bothering me. All the best skateboarders are black now. I'm like, when the fuck did this happen? I know. And nobody says a word about that shit.
Starting point is 00:33:53 Sorry, we had to take that shit. No peeps. Shout out to Lil Wayne. Shout out to Lil Weezy. Weezy did really. The biggest fake skateboarder in the world. He is. You always see him in his skate park, but just after he finished.
Starting point is 00:34:03 This is terrible. He'd be out of breath a little He really took that shit Fucking seriously You heard about this Dion Waiters shit? Listen Dion Waiters
Starting point is 00:34:14 I've been taking gummies Oh my way I have gummies for you guys Really? Oh shit Yes from Radix This weed company They had a specific thing for you
Starting point is 00:34:23 Right now? No no no Not right now. I'm about to tell a tale. Oh, I'm getting laid. No, no. I just bought CBD in San Diego. Gummies.
Starting point is 00:34:31 Aura. Really? Really? Son. Son. Yo. Son. That shit's still right there. Son Son Yo Son Son That shit is slacking bro
Starting point is 00:34:50 Later on the episode With Trevor We broke down the Chicken wing And how we like Made a new chicken wing Like you know how we call Asians chicken wings
Starting point is 00:34:59 Right An Asian chick Is a chicken wing And the reason we call her that Is because there was This Asian chick That we Airbnb'd at. And she just said, she was describing food in there.
Starting point is 00:35:09 She was like, there's sushi, there's chicken wing. And we're like, dude, that's what Asian women are called now. We were watching this Asian rapper, right? Yeah. There's a big line outside with all these bodied Asian chicks. Like with bodies. Was it like K-pop shit? No, it was rap.
Starting point is 00:35:23 Korean rap. Korean rap. But close, yeah. But it was all Asian chicks with some body It was like K-pop shit? No it was rap Korean rap But close yeah But it was all Asian chicks With some body in LA And we were like Damn there's some Thick and wings Out here
Starting point is 00:35:31 Thick and wings You got some Thick and wings They thick and wings So that's the new one You know what happened I've no shit Thought about at least
Starting point is 00:35:40 Six times this weekend And said In a room by myself Honey my dad Oh yeah Son that right there about at least six times this weekend and said in a room by myself Hanimastad oh yeah that right there that right there bro anytime you walk
Starting point is 00:35:52 in a Japanese restaurant and they do that whole shit you know where the whole place talks you know what I'm talking yeah what is that you know what they say
Starting point is 00:35:58 any of y'all know what they say no call Wheezy she knows what exactly what they say whatever I literally I just be like Hanimastad I go right back out Call Wheezy. She knows exactly what they say. Whatever.
Starting point is 00:36:07 I literally, I just go, I go right back out there. I go, I thought they were just saying hello. They just going hello. They throw hello at the end to throw you off. Hello. Hello.
Starting point is 00:36:19 Is it that? Isn't that arigato? And then like thank you? No, that's goodbye. Arigato is thank you, but there's something you say when they walk in. What is it? Arigatou gozaimasu. Arigatou gozaimasu.
Starting point is 00:36:33 Arigatou gozaimasu. Arigatou gozaimasu. They were just like, you're. I mean, that is their you're. That is their you're. That's their you're, son. Arigatou gozaimasu. Oh, my God. They have funny Asians create a you're. They reallyur, son. Oh, my God. That's why the Asians created yur.
Starting point is 00:36:48 They really did, bro. They're not even playing around. I'm glad you'll be appropriating. Oh, man. We going off. We really are. I missed you guys. I missed you guys.
Starting point is 00:37:06 I missed you guys. So, Dion Waiters, gummies. Okay. Dion Waiters, gummies. Real quick, by the way, thank you guys for selling out the town hall shows. Very excited for that. Yes, sir. Boston.
Starting point is 00:37:15 Oh, that's dope. Already. We got this going. Boston, Thursday. Second show has a few more tickets left. Connecticut. No, sorry. Boston, Saturday has a few more tickets left for the second show.
Starting point is 00:37:24 First show sold out. And Connecticut, a few more tickets left. That's show First show sold out And Connecticut Few more tickets left That's almost sold out as well So get on that real quick We added Edmonton And New Orleans And we got Seattle Early show sold out
Starting point is 00:37:33 Neptune Theater We have a late show Few more tickets left for that Go get that Theandrewshows.com For the rest of the tickets Now we get to talk about this shit Dion Waiters
Starting point is 00:37:40 Took the edible Passed out All been there before Didn't snitch Didn't snitch Teammate gave. All been there before. Didn't snitch. Didn't snitch. Teammate gave him the edible. Didn't snitch. Real motherfucker, bro.
Starting point is 00:37:49 Oh, wow. Real motherfucker. Suspended without pay. Ten games. Still didn't snitch. Ten games. Think about that. Ten games.
Starting point is 00:37:56 Real one. How much money has he probably lost? Oh, my God. Each game check's got to be at least, what, like 40 racks? Something like that? That's crazy. That's a good chunk of change he's missing out on. That's worse than being fined when they suspend you without pay.
Starting point is 00:38:10 No game checks. How much was his contract? I think this is a smart move. I think he got paid. I think he got paid. He got paid. So I think this is a good, like, now you just built up credibility with the rest of the league. Oh, for sure.
Starting point is 00:38:18 Every player in the league is like, I fucks with that guy. He could be on my team when he's, even after, he's kind of washed now, but even when he's like, washed, washed. 52 million? 47 million guaranteed. 52 million? Yo, we forget Waiters a few years ago was balling. Oh yeah. Yeah. For like half a year. Half a year was balling.
Starting point is 00:38:37 When he left Cleveland and went to Miami he did his thing. Yeah. Contract years. Those contract years are great. He is a contract year killer. Some guys are like that. All the time you get paid, Julius Randall, on top of his thing. Yeah. Contract years. Those contract years are great. He is a contract year killer. Some guys are like that. All the time you get paid, Julius Randle, on top of the list. Gang. Oh, speaking of, shit, I forgot to promote.
Starting point is 00:38:51 Champ Sports this Friday. I'll be there with my girl, Vic, interviewing Julius Randle for Slam and Champ Sports. You going to tell him that? Oh, we'll have some things to talk about. A contract year killer? You going to call him that? I mean, shit, he bowled down his contract year. We'll talk about it
Starting point is 00:39:05 Can we talk about Can we talk about the Knicks Oh my god I guess we have to You guys are so happy When you beat the Mavs Oh no no Fuck that
Starting point is 00:39:12 Everything's gone down Yeah it's done Have you seen what happened It's done You didn't see yesterday No Oh my gosh I had a great
Starting point is 00:39:20 I had a great day With my family I had my family Sunday fun day It was fantastic I was like alright Let's all go home and watch the Knicks. They're playing the Cavs. They just beat a good Mavericks team.
Starting point is 00:39:30 You know what I mean? Good game. They should handle the Cavs. The Knicks were 2-7. I think after they beat the Mavericks. We lost to Cleveland. No, that was their second win. We got worked by Cleveland.
Starting point is 00:39:39 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:40 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:40 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:40 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:41 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:42 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:42 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:43 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.. Yeah. I'm a good game. I'm a good game These are not bad, man. I'm going to eat it. Okay. It's Cleveland. It's a home game. But the fucking organization, they're talking about, James Dolan right now is talking about bringing Masai Ujiri, who's the president of the Raptors, to the Knicks.
Starting point is 00:39:57 Ken's finally not a believer. No, no, no. Can we just talk about this for one second? Dolan's thinking about bringing Masai Ujiri to the Knicks. I am 100% convinced that James Dolan hates black people. Because why would you ruin this many black people's lives? Specifically the black president. Specifically.
Starting point is 00:40:18 The black coach. The black GM. He's ruining jazz music with his band. Anything black he can get his hands on, he is ruining. You know what team that James Dolan owns that seems to be doing okay? The Rangers. The Rangers. That white hockey sport seems to be doing okay, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:40:31 But when them blacks are playing a sport, all of a sudden it's the worst management, it's the worst GM, it's the worst everything. The fact that they're thinking about firing Tisdale. Dude, honestly, this is Kardashian levels of fucking over black men that James Dolan is in. Right?
Starting point is 00:40:48 Because his Fisdale head coach is about to get replaced as if anybody could do anything else with this fucking team that we have. What the fuck? What the day? Son, you need Iron Man. You need Captain America. You need a lot of organizational shit to make the Knicks work right now. The fact that Steve Mills and who's the other bum that's running it? Scott Perry.
Starting point is 00:41:08 Steve Mills and Scott Perry. Those fucking Franks and Beans. I'm not mad at Scott Perry. Steve Mills is the one who's the fucking. They're both Franks and fucking Beans idiots. Steve Mills is the fucking. Doesn't matter. But Franks and Beans, those guys are talking about firing Fizdale.
Starting point is 00:41:22 Guys. Bro, here's my thing. The thing. What do you want Fizdale to do? Bro, here's my thing. The thing, you know me. What do you want Fizdale to do? This is black on black crime. I think this is akin to what's happening in Chicago. I think it's akin to what's happening all around the world. Like, this is like Rwanda-esque black on black.
Starting point is 00:41:36 I know what's happening in the Knicks organization. Real talk. Real talk. What's happening? It was so fucking weak, bro. 2-2 or who-two, I don't know. Hotel Madison Square Garden is not the place to bank. Okay?
Starting point is 00:41:49 It was such a weak fucking move, bro. Like, the whole fucking, they had the press conference right after the game. Like, yo, we're sorry. Like, we thought we were going to compete a little more. Like, the dude's a dead man walking now. Fizzdale. James Dolan hates black people. He hates black people. He hates black people.
Starting point is 00:42:06 He was trying to ruin everything black. Think about it. I'm going to try and convince people that Fizdale's a bad coach. He got Oakley banned from the Garden. Oakley banned from the Garden. Isaiah Thomas seen as a sexual predator now. Isaiah Thomas seen as himself. What else?
Starting point is 00:42:20 Mello can't get a job. Mello can't get a job. He hired an Asian. He was like, all right, let's see what this works. I talked to Jamal Crawford. I was like, yo, if the Knicks call you right now, you answer the phone? He's like, yeah, answer the phone. He's like, I'd love to come play for New York.
Starting point is 00:42:31 Really? Yeah. Quote, unquote. That'll go out tomorrow. Well, today, you guys. But I'm like, I don't know why you would, but like, you're just. He just wants a contract. He just loves ball.
Starting point is 00:42:39 He loves hooping, bro. That's a motherfucker. I think he can ball until he's 45 years old. James Dolan hates black people. He hates everything black, and he's trying to destroy everything black from the inside out. That is a fact. He will destroy jazz music with his band. He will destroy basketball.
Starting point is 00:42:58 He will destroy front office management. Do you think that two black guys that are running the Knicks right now are going to get another job in the front office? Oh, my God. Do you think? You think Scott right now are going to get another job in the front office? Oh, my God. Do you think? You think Scott Perry or Steve Mills can get another job in basketball after this abomination? Of course not. And you know what? They could be competent guys.
Starting point is 00:43:12 Here's my thing. But James Dolan will not let them win because he hates black people. James Dolan hates black people. Scott Perry's had success. Steve Mills is the one I'm like, you've been there for 20 years, dude. Bro, he hates black people. How are you still employed? Black people. The two black people
Starting point is 00:43:28 he hired both have white names, Scott and Perry. Both Steve and Mills. Steve, Scott, and David. Dude, come on, bro. Steve, Scott, and David? Sounds like a boy band. Oh, man. The problem is obviously Dolan, and I think the cat's out of the bag.
Starting point is 00:43:47 I think we know what's going on. He is a deeply racist man who hates black people and hates black success and hates black empowerment, and he's doing everything he can to suppress that. And I think, if I'm being honest with you, I think it's far worse than the guy who owned the Clippers. What was the guy who owned the Clippers? Sterling. Sterling just didn't want his wife around one black guy that had fucking AIDS. That's not even that crazy.
Starting point is 00:44:11 You know what I mean? A billion dollars. Like, come on. There's just one fucking black guy with HIV? That's a reasonable thing to say to your fucking wife, okay? And to be fair, he didn't say he didn't want him to be around him. He said, just don't take pictures with him. He can do whatever.
Starting point is 00:44:22 He was like, you can fuck him. You can hang out with him, whatever. Just don't take pictures with them. It makes me look bad. Don't take the picture. I don't want my friends thinking I got AIDS. You know what I mean? Whatever it is. When it comes, nobody has destroyed black lives like this man, James Dolan. I've seen his band live. I've
Starting point is 00:44:37 seen his band live. I'll give you that too. They made us go to this thing when I was on a TV show that was owned by his network. A TV show that he promoted by his network, right? A TV show that he promoted because it was about hockey. Interesting. You know what else MSG owns? Do you remember that channel Fuse?
Starting point is 00:44:54 Yeah. You ever seen a good black show on Fuse? A good hip-hop show on Fuse? They just take whatever from Complex. That's it. Oh, shit. That's what I did. Oh, shit. Well, Complex also got Flagrant fit of the week now.
Starting point is 00:45:05 Ah, that's right. Let's go ahead and Complex the gift and get the smoke both ways. I know you're listening. I know producers over there you're listening to this right now because you listen to it every week.
Starting point is 00:45:14 You're welcome for these gifts that we give you. But we are out here supporting creativity. Okay? Unlike James Dolan which is trying to squash Black Dreams.
Starting point is 00:45:22 What is that? They're biting. Of course they're biting. We don't support that shit. But we know they're biting. So is fucking First Take. Didn't they ask us to come to fucking Complex Fest or whatever the shit? They did.
Starting point is 00:45:34 They reached out. They reached out. Yo, emphasis on the con. Something. Dude, they're podcasting. Hey, let us convince you we're cool. I got no problem with complex, man, but that was, come on, son. You got to pay homage.
Starting point is 00:45:51 James Dolan, shockingly racist man. Is it shocking? Not that shocking. I mean. Not that shocking. Thou doth protest too much, bro. How the hell do you think you'll pull a guy like Masai Ujiri? Masai Ujiri. Masai Ujiri.
Starting point is 00:46:06 Masai. He's Nigerian. Masai's not a Nigerian name. There's one of them. How do you not know his name? Masai's not a Nigerian name. He is. You should know Masai's name, yo.
Starting point is 00:46:16 Whatever. You know what I mean. How the fuck do you think you could- You just let down your people, son. Son, you really did, bro. You let down our people. Because I mispronounced the- Fuck you, Alex.
Starting point is 00:46:24 I'm 10% Nigerian. Are you not Puerto Rican today, Alex? You're 10% Niger did, bro. You let down our people. Because I mispronounced the word. Fuck you, Alex. I'm 10% Nigerian. Oh, you're not Puerto Rican today, Alex? You're 10% Nigerian, bro. You're not Puerto Rican now? Come on, yo. I claim it, son. Real talk. Son, he like the Elizabeth Warren in Nigerian.
Starting point is 00:46:35 Real talk, bro. You might be. I found out I'm Nigerian. Yeah? I am. I'm 90% Nigerian. For real. I just 90% Nigerian. For real. I just did a 23andMe.
Starting point is 00:46:48 James Dolan got a 23andMe test you can take to find out how black you are. That's why Andy Schoen didn't make it past the first season. That's why. They pulled the plug. He tried chess. He was like, hold on. Wait a minute. What's this Eurobob motherfucker doing on our network?
Starting point is 00:47:05 We only kill careers over here. Yo, real talk, Mello might be a good basketball player. Mello might actually be a good black... Yeah, you're right. Let me stop. Y'all really think... That's a ridiculous thing. You watch...
Starting point is 00:47:16 What's the dude on the Lakers? Contell... Contavious Caldwell Pope. Contavious Caldwell Pope. Yes. And Mello can't get a look? Jared Dudley can't get off the bench? Because Contavious Caldwell Pope. Yes. And Melo can't get a look? Son. Jared Dudley can't get off the bench?
Starting point is 00:47:26 Because Contavious Caldwell Pope will shut the fuck up if somebody says something to him. Exactly. He'll play his role. Melo's done nothing but shut the fuck up for the past year. Son, no. All he does is do videos of Chris Brickley and just be like, yo, somebody please sign me. I'll do anything. He's too thirsty.
Starting point is 00:47:41 He's really thirsty. Now he's too thirsty? He uses equity up, yo. He's done. I don't believe you. I don't He's done. I don't believe you. I don't know, bro. I don't believe you. What is he really going to offer your team?
Starting point is 00:47:48 There's a point at which you're not good enough. Not really, though. Buckets, bro. Not really, though. Buckets. There's motherfuckers in here that cannot go and get you a bucket. Not really. And whatever the fuck you say about this dude, he can still do that.
Starting point is 00:47:59 Not really, though. Oh, gosh. You know what I mean? He should go drive a fucking subway. Even Chris Paul looks fucking good right now. He's in a Thunder. Yo, what team is he on? On the Thunder How much did we forget about Chris Paul?
Starting point is 00:48:09 I forgot he was in the league Dog, and they were like winning games They look actually like not terrible They look better than the Rockets Do they really? Yeah Yo, did you see that video of him blowing the guy? What?
Starting point is 00:48:18 Nah, I'm just joking Oh wait, they're not better than the Rockets But still Yo, how are the Clippers 6-3? That's four more games I thought they was going to win. My fault. Yo, the Clippers 6-3. Oh, because Kawhi taking rest.
Starting point is 00:48:30 Yeah, rest. Everybody's 6-3. Look at the fucking stack this goddamn conference is. Look at my Lakers, bro. That's my team, bro. Yo, look at my Lakers, bro. The Lake Show, that's my team. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:48:40 I think the Nuggets are going to make it to the finals. I don't know if I'm an idiot for that, but I think... Nah, I fucks with the Nuggets. That's what I think is doing it. I don't know, bro. I heard they don't look quite as good right now, but that was my pick early on. I'm not gonna lie. Nuggets is a word that I don't even feel comfortable saying. Nuggets, bro? Too many N and G's. It's a lot of N
Starting point is 00:48:58 and G in that one, bro. N and G's and S's in there, bro. Nuggets? Yo. I respect that. I respect that. Nugget. Nugget? I don't even know. Nugget sounds like you that. Nougat? It's a nougat? Nougat sounds like you combine in two. Right? No, nougat is like the shit inside the Snickers. Even Snickers don't sound right.
Starting point is 00:49:17 This whole thing is a game to get you to say the N-word, bro. I was watching this Nuggets game. I started eating some nougat. You ever have a Snickers? When you get that second N-word, I got uncomfortable. You got to lean into that K when you say Snickers. Snickers. Oh, let me get a Snickers? Yo, when you get that second N word, I got uncomfortable. You got to lean into that K when you say Snickers. Snickers. Oh, let me get a Snickers. Or like underwear.
Starting point is 00:49:31 Snickers. Snickers. Underwear is terrifying, bro. I can't even say it. The underwear in England. Yeah, what they call it in England. Yeah. Knickers?
Starting point is 00:49:38 I call them Knickers. Yeah. I pronounce a K in that motherfucker. Knickers. Knickers. Knickers. You know that thing when they make shit for bars and shit? It's called a swigger.
Starting point is 00:49:48 Oh, yeah. I don't know that one. Wow. You really wanted to say that. That's right. It's called a what? A swigger. Oh, no.
Starting point is 00:49:54 That's too close, bro. That's too close, bro. Could you say that one? Swiggers? Yeah. Swigger don't bother me. Swigger. Listen.
Starting point is 00:50:04 Swagger. That's fine. That is true. That is true. Swagger is fine. Swiggers never Yeah. Swigger don't bother me. Swigger. Swagger, that's fine. That is true. Swagger is fine. Swiggers never bother me. Dagger? I'm actually more comfortable around swiggers. Like those guys. Swiggers?
Starting point is 00:50:16 Yeah, swiggers make me comfortable. I mean, you guys are cool too, but you know. What is a swigger? The thing in the bar, right? That's what it is Oh Yeah I thought it's like a Swedish
Starting point is 00:50:29 No Swedish dude with brown hair? That's what they were calling ASAP in jail And Alex Oh god Son, ASAP going back to Sweden, son Bro
Starting point is 00:50:42 Because he got to For what? Not to do a show. No, he's not doing a show out there. I respect it. Fuck that, Steve. I really like the balls on this, bro. If I'm him, I'll tell him.
Starting point is 00:50:52 When he goes over there, I'll tell him to eat all my dicks. You can't go back. He's got to tell him to eat his dicks. We're not doing a show there. We're not supporting that. Yeah, fuck all that. And people go, it's not all the Swedish people. We know it's not all the Swedish people.
Starting point is 00:51:02 Obviously, it's not the Swedish people. We fuck with Swedish people. But your government conspired to keep him in prison. So when a government conspires to keep a guy in prison against false pretense, you can't feel safe there. You know what I mean? Even if they paid you how much? Was it $12 million? He can't need that, yo.
Starting point is 00:51:18 He can't need that bag that much. Sweden, son. Sweden. Whatever. Same shit. Yo, man. Yo. To Sweden Not all white countries
Starting point is 00:51:28 Are the same bro God What's the difference Between Sweden and Switzerland Right now 3000 miles Chocolate Chocolate
Starting point is 00:51:35 Good answer The army knives Good answer Army knives Meatballs Yeah yeah yeah Well wienerschnitzel Meatballs is Sweden Army knives is Switzerland Switzerland they well wienerschnitzel meatballs are Sweden
Starting point is 00:51:45 army knives are Switzerland Switzerland they speak a bunch of different languages yeah Roger Federer is Swiss he speaks like seven languages they make them watches Switzerland is Switzerland's
Starting point is 00:51:55 oh you're right about it that's well said if you really want to be white avidly it's so funny Switzerland's white got a line in my fucking Act with that
Starting point is 00:52:06 We might have to cut that You gotta cut it Damn But go on go on We could bleep I thought you were hating I was like why you ain't laughing That's great
Starting point is 00:52:12 Cause I'm like Yeah I know I know But Fuck Drake got booed Son Talk about that
Starting point is 00:52:19 First of all This guy Drake When he's getting booed I don't know if you guys Are watching this Tyler Creators. Camp Flogknog. Camp Flogknog. It's a festival that he does every year.
Starting point is 00:52:30 Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's Wolfgang backwards? Wolfgang backwards, yeah. Oh, I thought it was Wang Golf. No, it's Golf Wang. Golf Wang. Golf Wang. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:37 Oh, I thought it's like, I just imagine you're playing golf with your dick. Maybe. I don't know. It's Wolfgang? Yeah. Oh, okay. Anyway, so Tyler's got a massive great following It's really brilliant what he's been able to do
Starting point is 00:52:49 And curated this amazing audience And he asked Drake to, I guess, perform at this festival that he throws And then they fucking booed Drake And because he wasn't Frank Ocean Right Can I read his tweets today? Okay, let's see. Tyler, the creator.
Starting point is 00:53:07 Tyler, the creator's tweets. He said, quote, I thought bringing one of the biggest artists on the fucking planet to a musical festival was fire, but flip side, a little tone deaf,
Starting point is 00:53:16 knowing that specific crowd it drew. Some created a narrative in their head and acted out like assholes when it didn't come true, and I don't fuck with that. This nigga did feel No Ways. Song is beautiful. Also, mostly everyone was having a great time.
Starting point is 00:53:30 Those shits in the front area were the ones being mad rude, which I can see why, but nah, fuck that. Y'all misrepresented me and flogged to my guests and made us look so entitled and trash. That shit was like mob mentality and cancel culture in real life, and I think that shit is fucking trash. Nigga did Feel No Ways That song was beautiful Most guys don't do album cuts
Starting point is 00:53:49 Thank you Aubrey Like I love that song And thought that would never happen And he really did that for me And I appreciate it because he did not have to come at all See our worlds come together was so great in theory But hey man shit happens All jokes aside low-key funny ha ha ha
Starting point is 00:54:02 Aside from that hope everyone had a good time again No rest no bullshit, man. A lot of people enjoyed it. Thanks again. Again, thank you, Drake. I'm fucking pissed. Hotline Bloom was next, and that's my fucking shit. I'm going to play that in the shower right now.
Starting point is 00:54:14 Okay, last tweet. I was in the front, and I hear Tyler. And I look to my left, and this girl, red-faced, puffy, waterfall of tears, looked into my soul and said, trembling with anger, what the fuck is this shit nigga I turned away so quick
Starting point is 00:54:28 she was pissed bro and that was it that shit was not cool dog and he ended it with a K so I had a theory about this I've never been to a Tyler show
Starting point is 00:54:39 great show puts on a great show is is his audience predominantly male yeah it's a nice little mix Tyler brings out I would suspect Great show. Puts on a great show. Is his audience predominantly male? Yeah. It's a nice little mix.
Starting point is 00:54:52 I would suspect that his audience is predominantly male. I would suspect that, and there's nothing wrong with that at all. Yeah. But I would suspect his audience is predominantly male. And the thing about Drake is- He brings out the bitches. Yeah. Oh, outside bringing out the bitches. It's not about him bringing them out.
Starting point is 00:55:07 It's he performs to them. So imagine it's 90% dudes, right? And like skateboardery, kind of like hipstery dudes. And Drake is singing love songs to you and you're like, all right, man. All right, get out of here with that shit. Now, that premise holds true until you realize who they actually wanted to perform, which was the gay guy who was going to sing those love songs about you to you.
Starting point is 00:55:41 They wanted Frank Ocean. They booed Drake for Frank Ocean. Can we acknowledge Frank Ocean As one of the most overrated artists In the history of music Can we talk about it Get the hype I mean he's good
Starting point is 00:55:50 But like How What is he so good at Can I read one more thing The most brilliant marketing He could have possibly done Is just go the fuck away That's how you know that
Starting point is 00:55:57 Tyler's fans are super hypeys Because they like the shit They can't get Yeah They treat Frank Ocean Like a Jordan release Let me read one more fan account. Off-white.
Starting point is 00:56:07 He's Virgil of music. Yes. Virgil Records. That's what they should call themselves. Virgil Records, Megastore, opening up in Times Square. Now, this is from somebody who attended it, and he said, and this is making arounds on Reddit. Okay, it wasn't as simple as spoiled crowd boo-drape because they were expecting Frank,
Starting point is 00:56:22 like it was partially that, but that shit went down because so much confusion was set up to fail. Here's what happened. The entire festival is at this set and it's fucking packed. Tyler comes out five minutes late and says, thank you for coming, yada, yada, yada. Can I bring out some friends? Crowd gets hyped and A$AP Rocky comes out, plays two songs and leaves. Tyler comes back out, says, can I bring out another friend? Crowd gets hyped.
Starting point is 00:56:41 Lil Uzi Vert comes out, plays two songs and dips. Tyler does it again. This time Drake comes out. Drake plays plays a song says tyler wanted me for one or two songs but can i play some more if you want plays like five songs and people are hype but he keeps alluding like almost he keeps like alluding to almost being done so people don't know if he was the final person or what he then says he has two more songs and people are like cool there's still like a half hour that means more performances he finishes the two songs and people are like cool there's still like a half hour that means more performances he finished the two songs and says do you guys uh want more and everybody was like uh maybe like no one knew what was happening and so apparently he didn't like the
Starting point is 00:57:14 response so he just walked off and then nothing literally stood there for 15 minutes not knowing it was over or what the fuck was happening finally the lights go on and the words thanks for coming comes on the big screen i wasn't at the front so maybe I didn't hear the boos, but people were trying to get down to the songs from what I saw and while the people around me at least were disappointed if Drake was the finale, so to speak, they would have been fine and enjoyed the set if they had made it clear no one else was coming.
Starting point is 00:57:37 Yeah, I saw the video. I didn't watch it. It's, some people were there, some people weren't. I thought that he handled it so graciously and this is why he's been on the top of the game for 10 years is like he literally just goes to them he sees the booze he goes listen i'm here for y'all if y'all want me to be here right and i'm down to perform for y'all if y'all want it do you want me to keep going and then there's some rise and there's some booze he goes all right y'all thank you so much i love y'all
Starting point is 00:58:03 y'all have a good night like in that moment and we've all had that moment on stage as comics where we just go into fuck you mode and just start tearing the fucking crowd apart and digging in to have that humility yeah son that's why he's been on top of the game and someone asked him about he's like you got to welcome the humbling moments that was a humbling moment you he's the biggest rapper in the world has been for the last 10 years a motherfucker got booed like that is it made me feel so good why because like he's so successful he's so fucking successful and this guy who's made almost like a billion dollars making whatever the fuck he was still found a crowd of people who didn't fuck with him so if there's any like thing to take from that it's like yo if he hasn't already and this is from someone who's not a fan if he hasn't already
Starting point is 00:58:48 he's going to be in that goat conversation oh yeah right next to the artist of the decade like nobody's been bringing him in the 20s but it's gonna be like they're not they're gonna look at jay-z like whatever man jay-z's a better businessman drake's a better rapper drake's a better day like it's gonna be a real debate too you're not going to have a lot of grounds to disagree. Oh, yeah, because he's got... The thing that Drake has that Jay-Z never really had was those hit songs. Juice.
Starting point is 00:59:13 Juice. Juice for sure. Juice and Canadians. That is very true. But Drake got those hit songs, man. Like, Hove was always like... Hove never had bangers like that. He never had hits like that.
Starting point is 00:59:30 He had a handful. He had Hard Knock knock life he had fucking and even big people wasn't like huge like how I'm bling was huge fucking God's I heard big pimple huge like the big pin was poppy songs trust me I understand what you say about like big song but we talking about about massive Z100, top 40, number one, you beating out Taylor Swift, Madonna, those type of shit. I understand what he's saying. Those type of shit. He's crossed over to mainstream music in general,
Starting point is 00:59:55 not just hip hop. Yeah, Big Kibbutz is big to us, but Jay-Z don't got a bigger song than God's Plan. Jay-Z don't got a bigger song than fucking Hotline Play. Jay-Z don't got one dance. He don't got no dances. He ain't got one dance, bro. Jay-Z don't got a bigger song than fucking Hotline Play. Jay-Z don't got one dance. He don't got no dances. He ain't got one dance, bro. He don't got like... Jay-Z kind of trash. You right.
Starting point is 01:00:10 Alright, don't say all that. We ain't gonna say all that shit, bro. But now, I guess it's... No. You almost had me there. Almost had me. Stir up the pot, baby. Stir up the pot. baby. Stir up the pot.
Starting point is 01:00:25 I definitely do foresee a world where people don't even look at Jay-Z as a rapper, like on some Charles Barkley shit. Kids are just like, oh, that's just the funny guy on TNT. It's like, no, Charles Barkley was the shit when he played ball. The shit. Charles the man, bro. Charles the motherfucking man. This is the beginning of the end for Drake people have always loved him this is the first
Starting point is 01:00:53 time I've ever seen the people not love him but these are the types of people don't know like this this crowd his, like Tyler's crowd, I imagine reflects Tyler and his life, which is a little bit outcasted. They're like the, Tyler's like the black insane clown posse. And his fans are like
Starting point is 01:01:15 that version as well. Like, we didn't fit into the stereotype of our race. Yeah. Do you know what I'm talking about? I get what you're saying. Juggalos, they're black juggalos. Yeah, they're like black misfits
Starting point is 01:01:25 And also the white kids they feel a little weird and they also skateboard and they're all like hey, we're all outsiders But then again you all hang out with each other so you're not outsiders you have your own group But you want to fit like they're leader built this entire fan base off of being like the anti Drake Yeah, but their leader who's Tyler? Invited Drake out so they should automatically like the person that their leader is telling you, hey, I'm inviting to my concert. So the fact that the people are going against their leader and booing Drake, that means Drake is starting to lose fan faith.
Starting point is 01:01:59 Ten years is a long time. I know he's been on top for a long time. Everybody got to go down. This is the beginning of that. Everybody got time. But just like that, now he's got something to prove. I think he's been on top for a long time. Everybody got time. Everybody got to go down. This is the beginning of that. Everybody got time. But just like that, now he's got something to prove. I think he's too smart, bro. I think the guy's too smart.
Starting point is 01:02:08 I think it's similar to what happened with Jay-Z after Ether, where the push thing, I think Drake recovered quicker, but there's still a little weird thing, but it'll eventually go away. It's a chink in the armor. It definitely is a chink in the armor, because I can't even listen to if you're reading this, it's too late anymore. And I love that project.
Starting point is 01:02:24 That was my favorite Drake project at one point, but now I just hear What's the name Quentin Quentin? What's the Quentin Miller? Quinn Miller I just hear the fucking reference tracks every time I put on a song my damn He really ruined that album for me. I'm me grew now dude. Isn't it so weird that you can say chink in the armor? It's a normal term. You can say chink in the arm. You can't say chink in the armchair, right? That would be super racist.
Starting point is 01:02:52 You can say chink in the armor, but not chink in the armchair. And there is- Can you imagine if you made that slip up on a TV broadcast? On national TV? Say what? What'd they say? Oh, was it the Jeremy Lin thing? Yeah, so they said that about Jeremy Lin, that there's a ch the armor i don't know they said armor though but imagine if you were like
Starting point is 01:03:08 there's you just it's just one of those chinks in the armor are we hiding chinks in the armor like it would be a crazy thing to say it just shows you like what that type of thing shows you right it exposes the absurdity of of like language and meaning that we put into language right they're literally just sounds that we make out of our mouth and we add all the meaning to them like the n-word thing where we couldn't even say words that were around the n-word why it's just sounds they're literally just sounds and people will fight someone out of a wall outside of walmart because you say that sound to them why give someone that much power over you feels good that popeye's video though of the guy getting fucked up that shit was hilarious
Starting point is 01:03:58 yeah but they did that to take his chicken sandwich i had nothing to do with the n-word but that's what it's not but they. He never even called him N-word. No, yes, he did. No, he didn't. They made that up. Son, you see, it's a video. He goes, have a nice day, guys.
Starting point is 01:04:10 And they're like, they're like, yo, he called us N-word. Take his chicken sandwich. Can I talk about that chicken sandwich? Yeah. What? Yo.
Starting point is 01:04:19 It's not as good as it was the first time? Bro, the new shit stepped on, B. Really? The new shit has stepped on. It's mids? Yo, like, I don't know what they did with the first time. Bro, the new shit stepped on, B. Really? The new shit has stepped on. It's mids? Yo, like, I don't know what they did with the OG formula.
Starting point is 01:04:28 The OG formula had some cracks wriggled in it or something. I think there was something wrong with the old one. You think something was wrong with the old one? It was a mistake. No, no, no. I think they put something in it that shouldn't have been. That's why they pulled it quick before they got caught. Before people started testing it.
Starting point is 01:04:42 Really? I can see that. I think so. I can see that. And what do you think they put on that just made black people go crazy? Extra chicken. MSG. I'm thinking MSG.
Starting point is 01:04:55 Extra chicken. What's MSG? Watermelon seeds. MSG is like a type of salt. Let me tell you one thing. That shit is really bad. It tastes amazing. It tastes amazing, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:05:06 But it's horrible for you. Yeah. And that's why James Dolan named it MSG. Because it feels good while it kills you. The Knicks don't even feel good. No. Think about the Knicks name, the Knickerbockers. He has the N-word built into it.
Starting point is 01:05:26 He's a racist man. This is, he's a truly racist man who hates black people, bro. He named his team the Knickerbockers so he could say the N-word freely around them. Yes, the team was named way before him, but it doesn't matter. He bought that team. Get around Knicks. Oh, my gosh. Yes, the team was named way before him, but it doesn't matter. Gather round, Knicks. Gather round, Knicks. Oh, my gosh.
Starting point is 01:05:51 Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. And that's why he wants them to lose all the time, so he can always hear, man, they moved the hell out of them, Knicks. Yo! I'm pretty sure he had a few slip-ups. They beat them, Knicks. Like, they stole some, which they probably did. He's like, where's those Knicks? I mean, Kn few slip ups Beat them Knicks Like they stole some Which they probably did He's like where's those Knicks I mean Knicks Knicks Knicks
Starting point is 01:06:08 He's like where's those Knicks Every year I hope James Dolan Racist man Just give him that Racist man Just give him that Sterling bro Aren't you trying to do the garden one day son
Starting point is 01:06:21 Say what Aren't you trying to play the garden one day We gonna delete all this I'm about to say I just got proof of press passes do the garden one day. Say what? Or you try to play the garden one day. We gonna delete all this? Don't. I'm about to say, I just got proof of press passes now. No, we gonna,
Starting point is 01:06:30 we gonna, we gonna work this out. We gonna work this out. We still need to fucking, somebody to put the old episodes on Patreon only. Man, we gonna figure that out. Look,
Starting point is 01:06:38 right after this racist ass Dolan gets out of office, we need to get Dolan out of office, bro. That's what it is. That's how much I care about my Knicks. You guys got to figure out scandals. If I got any Cowboy fans that want to get a Me Too for Jerry Jones,
Starting point is 01:06:51 you got a girl that you're willing to serve up? At least Jerry Jones is like, he keeps you all in the conversation. Listen, I'm not going to say. Y'all is probably worse. Yeah, y'all's is probably worse, but it also sucks to just always have hope and then lose it. But they're both just, you got to get them out of there. It's terrible.
Starting point is 01:07:07 It's terrible. Dude, who plays the lottery more than black people? Spanish folk. Spanish. This is true. People of color love the lottery. Get them numbers. Right?
Starting point is 01:07:17 They play my numbers. Do Indians play a lot of them? If it's only when it gets like massive. Stop it. They sell it. Like the what the? They sell it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:07:24 That ain't wrong. Not wrong at it. They sell it. Like the what though? They sell it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That ain't wrong. Not wrong at all. They got it right there. I wonder if we get margins on the lotto tickets. I've been wanting that. They be holding that shit up to the light like, is this? Trying to find the right one. The stores that win, they get a cut.
Starting point is 01:07:38 Yeah, you get a piece. Yeah. Oh, word. And they own all the stores. They got it. That's how we hustle yo Yeah Yo MVP convo
Starting point is 01:07:47 Lamar Jackson Lamar Jackson I still got Russell Wilson Bro But Lamar's looking Impresivo Bro
Starting point is 01:07:55 Impresivo I tweeted this yesterday If NFL players Have Heisman moments Yesterday was This fucking Heisman moment That little spinny I didn't see that
Starting point is 01:08:04 Can somebody pull that up? I was traveling. Bro. I tell the show on the night. It was Vic-esque. Son. Vic-esque, bro. Started running downhill like Vic.
Starting point is 01:08:13 Remember when Vic would really put on the jets and it seemed like his legs were catching up to his body like a cartoon. You would watch it in slow motion and it's still moving mad fast. Just murdering it. Motherfucking murdering it. And we should never, ever, ever. The better he gets at passing too, it's going to get unfair. Oh, perfect passer rating today, by the way.
Starting point is 01:08:34 Last game. Perfect passer rating. Here it goes. Right here. Boom. Fake option. Excuse me. Excuse me.
Starting point is 01:08:42 Whoop. Excuse me. Whoop. And we gone. Son, and Excuse me. Whoop. Excuse me. Whoop. And we gone. And we gone. Step. Spin. Gone.
Starting point is 01:08:51 Gone. No one's touching him. Untouched. That's just like game day. Jesus Christ. Out of here. Sorry. And this is a guy who hates to run.
Starting point is 01:08:59 He said, I would rather just sit in a pocket and throw. But if he could do that shit, come on. Fuck on, dude. But honestly, those are the types of plays where if he gets blasted by a linebacker or a safety when he does that. Oh, he will one day. Everybody will be calling him an idiot for it. He will one day. But he's the best show in football right now.
Starting point is 01:09:16 That's why Steve Young said this. About any mobile quarterback, you have to learn to do most of your damage from the pocket. And I think that's part of it is you're concerned about this guy getting hurt. And that's always my concern with him, man. As someone who loves watching him play, I don't want him to get hurt. I need him to do this sparingly. Take your shots when they're really necessary. But he actually can throw.
Starting point is 01:09:40 He seems like he's getting better at pocket passing and wants to. Like Dak got better at pocket passing. Dude, what was that video with Dak? I was watching limited audio in the green room, and there's something like there's a way when you're scrambling to the left, you open up your hips a certain way and you can throw it better. So he was literally just doing that hip shift to prepare for if I'm on the run. And then I didn't see any good real memes about it.
Starting point is 01:10:04 I thought there would be one. I tweeted the best one. That's a very New York one. That's about to be the next dance on TikTok. Bro. Oh, yeah. The shit he's doing. They got remixed that shit.
Starting point is 01:10:14 Overnight. You got it on my timeline, Eden? I just tweeted it out, like, a few moments ago. But what was it? Here it is. There it is. See, I was, like, opening up his hip. Put up that volume, though.
Starting point is 01:10:25 Can you play that? Yeah, yeah, no. Don't play it. Don't play it. It's when Blackie goes suave, I'm in. Suave. Suave. Suave.
Starting point is 01:10:32 Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave.
Starting point is 01:10:33 Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave.
Starting point is 01:10:34 Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave.
Starting point is 01:10:34 Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave.
Starting point is 01:10:34 Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave.
Starting point is 01:10:35 Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave.
Starting point is 01:10:35 Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. Suave. I'm like, can I do that? I'm like, am I supposed to trust you for that? What? Try to do it. You think I can do that?
Starting point is 01:10:46 Hold on. Let's see. Let's see. Let's see. You just got to throw that. You just got to throw that. Hey. You just got to hit that.
Starting point is 01:10:57 You got to get the wing. Kaz is only moving his upper body. Your hips ain't. Let me give you some space, Kaz. Okay, get that shit. Hey. Hey. Hey. Sorry. Your hips ain't Let me give you some space, Kaz Okay, get that shit Kaz gonna do that too hard And dick slap Somebody's gonna photoshop
Starting point is 01:11:14 These dick slaps Oh, gosh I don't mind That actually felt really good Thank you Oh, boy Oh, boy Elvis Crespo, bro What else. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Elvis Crespo, bro.
Starting point is 01:11:27 What else we got, boys? We got a long episode because we got the interview as well. So we're going to wrap this one up. We could talk about poor Gordon Haywood. We could talk about KSI, Logan Paul. LSU, Bama was a great game. We could talk about Hermione dating herself. This bitch a loser in the books and real life.
Starting point is 01:11:42 We can talk about Hermione dating herself. This bitch a loser in the books and real life. That's funny. That's funny. Hey, bitch, nobody like you ever, huh? She said, she's like, I'm not single. I'm self-partnered. You know what's so sad about that is that she's admitting that she doesn't want to be lonely.
Starting point is 01:12:09 So she made up like a fake best friend or something like that. Like self-partner. Just say you alone. Say no one want to deal with your yapping about the environment. Is this the bitch that care about the environment? Most bitches care about the environment. Is this the Swedish bitch? She does look a little like her. This is Hermione Granger, yo.
Starting point is 01:12:23 Ain't that the environment, though? She does look a little like her. She is Hermione Granger, yo. Ain't that the environment, though? She does look a little like her. She ain't, uh, Twilight bitch? That's not the Twilight bitch. No, this is the girl from Harry Potter that cares about the environment from Sweden. You might be right. I don't know, though. I don't know.
Starting point is 01:12:35 I'm pretty sure she's English. She's so cute right there. I'm partnering this dick up here. You know what I'm saying? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean over here? Shit. Back in the day before you had a girlfriend, of course.
Starting point is 01:12:51 Yeah, you're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. What do you say, man? I wish I would have had that a few weeks ago. I wish I would have had that. He remembered, bro.
Starting point is 01:13:01 That's why I was laughing. That's how you know I was getting flagged around here. I totally forgot. Who's got a miney out here, bro. He hit that. That's why I was laughing. That's how you know I was getting flagrant out here. I totally forgot. Get a mindy out here, bro. I know he remembered because he hit the no, I'm just kidding right away. Oh, God. I just did. No, I'm just kidding.
Starting point is 01:13:13 No, I forgot about my girlfriend when I said that. Oh, God. And then Alex reminded me. Son, that's how much he loves Harry Potter. Son, he throw it all away. You know what? I'm reading the books. I'm just slacking.
Starting point is 01:13:23 My girl told me about Harry Potter So that's on her That's on you Okay That's on you You made me cheat You made me cheat Now come get this quidditch bitch Watch you ride my broom
Starting point is 01:13:37 There we go Oh that's so great bro Yo When I heard that Yo isn't it funny that I thought it was Loki kind of fly What That self partnership Why Why is it fly Cause I can just run with that That's so great, bro. Yo, when I heard that, I thought it was low-key kind of fly. What? That self-partnership.
Starting point is 01:13:46 Why? Why? Why is it fly? Because I can just run with that. Yo, you know what's mad funny about? You know, black women have been doing this for decades, though. I got it, man. His name is Jesus.
Starting point is 01:13:57 It's the same thing. It's just there's what we got to tell bitches. My son is my Valentine-ass bitch. The fucking worst yo Like come on man Yo that's funny though You wanna tell girls Tell girls that you're self partnered
Starting point is 01:14:12 So you can't be in a relationship Cause I'm self partnered right now Self partnered Oh Gang I guess a little bit Yo you know what's funny though About witches
Starting point is 01:14:20 Is that like It's like you know how they be riding on the brooms and shit right it's like even with all
Starting point is 01:14:31 your magical powers you still gotta clean you know I'm saying like like these bitches can hocus pocus and a cauldron and a cauldron
Starting point is 01:14:41 you can clean it clean it bitch that's all you are Get out of here With your hocus pocus Why don't you Hocus pocus the bed Okay
Starting point is 01:14:49 Why don't you Get the fucking Dustpan out Let's go Fix up this house Yeah Jesus Christ Anyway
Starting point is 01:14:59 Guys It's been wild We got an interview Coming up right now With our guy Trevor Wallace very yeah we'll do it after
Starting point is 01:15:09 but very funny kid making his way in new media I'm very proud of him and I want to you know give him this platform
Starting point is 01:15:19 to showcase his stuff you guys might have seen some of his viral videos out there in the world and I'm sure you'll get used to him he also got a podcast called Stiff Socks he's got a podcast with our boy stuff you guys might have seen some of his viral videos out there in the world and um we also got a podcast called stiff socks we've got a podcast with our boy michael blaustein we talk about that um in the interview as well enjoy and um you already know keep it tight as
Starting point is 01:15:38 always it's been flagrant too p what's up everybody now um my illustrious podcast hosts are not in town, even though you've probably listened to them for about an hour with me today. Akash is in Tempe currently because we're recording this on Sunday, and Kaz is probably doing anything else. That's Kaz's level of dedication to this podcast. He's doing anything. He treats us worse than his feet. You got to see a picture of those feet no you really don't you really don't have to see but but we have a special guest here i'm very excited to have on the podcast i've been watching your
Starting point is 01:16:14 your rise and grind now for uh for a while you popped up on my radar um i think just by dming me you you yeah yeah you were doing oxnard liberty live out there and i was like before that yeah even for that yeah yeah this is trevor wallace everybody you probably have seen 100 have seen some of the youtube videos tons of these viral youtube videos um the first one i saw that really i think i texted you about it it was the dads oh yeah yeah i was fucking dying man but you do these characters where you're mocking these you're mocking you're mocking these figures right yeah your stereotypes pretty much as a personality of somebody yeah and you really get into character and now you got other guys kind of doing it with you and yeah yeah kind of just expanding found this like little
Starting point is 01:17:00 group of people that just like riff similarly and i mean we don't write any of the shows just turn the camera on film for 45 minutes condense it's like five minutes in yeah but what i mean i've never been a big like here's a script can you hit that line like it feels just so like static and not funny to me so we just fuck around getting that's the hard part about acting right is like making so many auditions yeah i mean they send me out on legit shit and i eat shit for it you know i had an audition for silicon valley ate so much shit for it yeah you know and it's because you're looking at it like man i could write this funnier right i would say this in this moment and you're
Starting point is 01:17:33 like is that a is that like a question mark is that a comma and then you're like saying it and then you're just looking like in a mirror it just doesn't feel right it doesn't feel like a human you're like yeah you're like i'm trying to i don't know no i get it completely it's so much easier to say shit that like comes to you organically right exactly that's and that's why some look i don't have a lot of respect for actors at all but like there are certain things like we had jeremy piven on on the podcast and jeremy piven said he didn't uh ad lib or improv a single line really from entourage and while that's crazy to me i was heartbroken because i thought that he wrote everything yeah the character was just so i don't know it's just so amazing but he's like no every word was in the script and then i was like okay as an actor that's
Starting point is 01:18:15 pretty impressive because you made it seem right you know so you but it's like he's just bringing words to life you know shout out to the writers you know i was like where are the writers getting hoes off this is it just jeremy definitely not i don't think i don't think writers get hoes and real talk they should because they're the most powerful people that's what i'm saying if you're a really good writer all they gotta do is write in uh blonde 38 year old looks like a jessica oh then the girl comes in and jessica she auditions oh wow boom he's gonna get any roles right pivins out here just reading lines saying shit and fucking yeah but but they're like we were saying it's hard to read a line it is it's hard to read a line and make it funny like it's the antithesis of everything that we learn in stand-up yeah like
Starting point is 01:18:54 stand-up oh i should say that your background is stand-up yeah started standing first yeah started stand-up first then you started working for um russell simmons yeah all that digital all that digital and i think that's when you reached out to me and you were offering to help me out with my instagram yeah and it was it was great and uh just like literally everybody who's ever worked with me they like reached out and they're like hey you can do this better and you were teaching me how to i was just trying to reach up to the next level and be like how do i get in with somebody that's exactly that's what Mark did. That's what Alex did.
Starting point is 01:19:26 You know, I'm sure, Ed, and I don't know how you got here. You hit up Alex. Oh, fuck, this guy got here. Fuck, who the fuck are you? He's like, oh, no, I sleep on the floor below. Oh, word, yeah. But you did what so many people don't do, right? So many people are like, hey, can I open up for you on the road?
Starting point is 01:19:42 What value does that add for you? Zero value. Right, exactly. You immediately came in with value, and I saw that you understood new media, and I was trying to get an understanding of new media at the time, and I'm not shocked at all to see what's happening, man. It's really exploded for you. Thank you, man.
Starting point is 01:19:58 It's been crazy. So you catch this niche, right? And what do you even call it? Shit. I feel like i just play the stereotypes that people know really well it's like because it's usually a trait of somebody yes because it's a lot of times for me comedy is it'll be like hometown hero yeah the other one the hometown bro uh like the guy who never leaves home yeah the hometown guy yeah so like for that
Starting point is 01:20:17 one i just went down my facebook i don't fuck with facebook really it's yeah it's a weird place it feels like just like a shitty applebee's so like I go through it and I just like, because what happened, that character some dude messes me from my hometown. He used to be the quarterback, like stud, long hair like fucking, he looked like a... Is long hair a good quality? What was that QB, Sonny?
Starting point is 01:20:38 Oh bro, I mean as a high school quarterback, it doesn't even matter bro. You fucking hand off the ball and you got good hair, you're getting ass, you know? He DM'd me one day, he's like, yo I got a three year old if you ever need it for a video. And It doesn't even matter, bro. Dude, he's a stud. Long hair. You fucking hand off the ball and you got good hair, you're getting ass, you know? He DM'd me one day. He's like, yo, I got a three-year-old if you ever need it for a video. And I was just like, bro, offering up a three-year-old to be in a video. And I was just like, what?
Starting point is 01:20:53 Dude, he throws passes, bro. That's what he does. He's still quarterbacking. Yeah, exactly. He's just lobbing off that baby, fucking hot routing him. So I just heard that. And I was like, what the fuck is wrong With people from my hometown Right
Starting point is 01:21:05 Then I started going through Facebook And started writing that Where are you from originally Camarillo, California Camarillo You know Oxnard Levity Live Club Yeah Camarillo's the outlets
Starting point is 01:21:12 Yeah yeah You know the outlets I went to UCSB Look at this Yeah you did Santa Barbara What is this Shellfish Company
Starting point is 01:21:18 Come on baby Camarillo That's born and raised I know Camarillo Keep going So you see him You think he's a loser Because he offers up his child to you.
Starting point is 01:21:25 I was just like, what the fuck is wrong with people? And then you decide to make fun of him. You're a fucking sociopath. Yo, yeah, I have to. This poor guy is trying to get a free babysitter. Yeah, oh, I didn't even think about that. Dude, that's all it was. I bet this douchebag will watch my kid for four hours.
Starting point is 01:21:38 You got tickets to the fucking lifted truck convention down the street. You got to go to Spearmint. Yeah, exactly. There is a Spearmint Rhino right in our town. Santa Barbara, bro. Fucking shout him out. Wait, you guys got one in Camarillo too? It's in Oxnard.
Starting point is 01:21:50 It's like 10 minutes away. The Spearmint. Oh, they have one in Spearmint. Is there a lot of Spearmint Rhinos? Yeah, yeah. It's a chain. Chain. Wow.
Starting point is 01:21:56 Chain, yeah. Oh, there was one called PJ's. That was the one that was the local one. PJ's. It was in Oxnard. Okay, so you decide to just kind of like roast this one guy. Now, is he familiar? You're making fun of him?
Starting point is 01:22:08 Probably, but I also think he's one of those guys that's like, hey, you see this? Yo, Trevor Wallace talking shit about me right now. Yeah, he's hyped about it. He's like dapping up a three-year-old who just doesn't know what that is. Three-year-old's just like, bro, what? We made it. Give me some titty milk, all right?
Starting point is 01:22:21 Yeah, so I mean, I just take traits. I was just like, shit I see around and just really just go with that you know because right i think some of the videos that people do like wigs and this stuff it's like it's too overproduced i just want something that people can be like oh that's so much like mark that's so much like this shit you know it's just right relatability and truth and that's really comedy and right i mean yeah but it wasn't accidental for you and this is why i i want to have you on because i try to i try to give as much exposure to new media guys as I can. Guys who I think really understand new media.
Starting point is 01:22:50 Because we're going to be the people that are basically controlling this industry as regular Hollywood kind of falls apart. I had some general meetings with some networks out here. They don't get it. The shit they got coming for 2020. I was like, what? What were you talking to them about it was just like every network is like they're bringing back all these old shows and it's like like why do you think they're doing that because those hit back in the day and they're like you guys remember this show right it's like yeah two reasons one
Starting point is 01:23:18 it hit back in the day but two the only people that still watch TV. Are the people who used to watch that shit. Damn. So they're making TV for older people because the TV demo has gotten older because old people don't know how to work YouTube. But when have reboots ever worked? No, they slap. Roseanne slapped. And so she went wild. Until she took that. What did she take? Ambien or some shit and started wilding out on Twitter?
Starting point is 01:23:40 I don't think she took anything. That's just who she was. She just woke up. Yeah, yeah. She woke up. She just said the girl looked like Planet of the Apes. And I'll be honest with you, she didn't not. She didn't not.
Starting point is 01:23:52 Yo, I retweeted that shit. That might have been the reason fucking people saw it. Bro, she didn't not, Al. Did she not? That's cool. That's an edit point right there. If it was anybody but Roseanne, people would have gotten away with it. I don't think she looks like a monkey.
Starting point is 01:24:05 I just want to point that out. We don't have to lose our careers off of this. Thank you. But back to what we were saying. So it seemed to me that this was not like an accident with you. That like you were working at ADD for a while. Yeah, yeah. And then did you witness Russ do anything wild over there?
Starting point is 01:24:23 Russell was, He's so weird Cause he's very like a yogi You know On his Instagram He would like post All these like motivational quotes And then he'd walk in What the fuck y'all doing
Starting point is 01:24:31 I'm just like bro What about the peace Love and positivity shit Where's the whole Praying hands and robes That's how Asians get down bro I mean Like
Starting point is 01:24:39 That yoga shit is for white people bro Cause Asians stay Murdering each other Right like Have y'all ever gone to an Asian place that's calm? Go to Chinatown. Are they zen? No.
Starting point is 01:24:48 They're just screaming, right? Fish flying out of buckets and shit. It's nothing yoga at all. India's crazy. Is India not crazy? I think white people are the only ones that find peace and calmness in it. Yes. I don't know.
Starting point is 01:25:03 Bro, I've done it. Because Russell used to own a hot yoga studio and he gave us free passes. I went a few times. Was that a grooming crowd? Bro, it was hidden. It was weird. It was dark. I didn't know what was going on. Did you see him going after hoes or what? They're not as... But it's like a
Starting point is 01:25:17 yoga flex. He would be touching the back of his heels while having a conversation like a bridge. Oh yeah, what you doing after this? Just looking like an upside down you or something but i mean russell the funniest part about russell is like he's still russell simmons like yeah people understand like how powerful he was back in the day so like to see him become all zen and all that shit and then like he in office like i was he was intimidated you know he i was an intern but who the fuck is this white boy and i just have to be like, I post your memes, sir.
Starting point is 01:25:46 And he's like, man, what the fuck is that? But he's powerful. And God damn, it was cool to just work with somebody like that. I think he's in like Bali right now. I think he did. Yeah, he got out. He got out. Charge his head and he's like, Dubai.
Starting point is 01:25:59 And then just. Where can I go where rape is legal? Allegedly, guys. Allegedly. You guys didn't hear the asterisk on that? There was an asterisk next to that. I don't know what the fuck Russ is doing. He did go to some weird ass place.
Starting point is 01:26:14 Thailand? It was Bali, right? I think it was Bali. Bali's in Indonesia? I think so. I believe. Anyway, so. I believe, bro.
Starting point is 01:26:23 I believe. He just dipped and was like, new life. And then, yeah. You got $100 million in the bank. Probably got $100 million in cash. Yeah, I mean, who knows what the fuck he's doing. He got away with it. Yeah, I mean, is that the move?
Starting point is 01:26:34 You just dip. Yeah. You just third world country it up. Dude, that's it. Roman Polanski, bro. And he got to go to France. Jesus. How crazy is that?
Starting point is 01:26:43 That, like, he went to France and America was like, hey, we need him back because he was like raping girls. Right. And France was like, well, how old were they? And then we were like 15. They were like, eh. And then they just depended on the Marylanders. What is 15, eh?
Starting point is 01:27:02 Metric system. What the fuck? Dog years, you know. Have a year, take a year, daylight saving, whatever. Jet lag. You live here. Jet lag. Anyway, man.
Starting point is 01:27:17 So here you are in this space. You're understanding actual new media. Yeah. And you're doing what I think some smart people do, which is like try to help somebody with a bigger platform than yourself. Yeah. You do that at ADD, right? You do that. You try to come to me, right?
Starting point is 01:27:35 And then eventually you make this jump to do it yourself. What I want to know is when did that happen and what made you you realize okay i'm gonna start helping me instead of other people yeah uh one of the guys i work with kev on stage you guys if you guys know him the motherfucker hilarious he's like my mentor and everything yeah it's like i saw him doing it and i remember do a show with uh tony baker uh him tony bacon to hear more tour together but he also has a show, yeah, Righteous and Ratchet with Doughboy.
Starting point is 01:28:06 With Doughboy, yeah, I know that, yeah, I caught his on that. Right, right, Doughboy wilding out,
Starting point is 01:28:10 yeah, he was on that. Love all those guys. Yeah, all those guys are so funny, so what's cool about ADD is it kind of launched a career of so many people,
Starting point is 01:28:16 and then once it went under, you know, the talent shined, and everybody had a platform from that, essentially, but I was working there, I remember my first video
Starting point is 01:28:23 that hit a million was like in 2017, I was fucking geek i was like bro like where the hell is the video where's the mimosas you know no because i was still working a day job looks like we raped it get 10 million we'll talk um'm like alright Yeah I had that And I was like I was just like I like showed Kev
Starting point is 01:28:47 And he's like fuck it Ah well I'm gonna get back to work And then you know It was just day to day stuff What was the video? It was mocking like The Zoomies employees That was like the early early on
Starting point is 01:28:55 The first character I really did That did well And then like a year ago Last September I just felt it I was like man I'm getting these views I'm starting to get money from videos
Starting point is 01:29:04 I'm saving up money You know like I booked When I really realized it I was like man I'm getting these views I'm starting to get money From videos I'm saving up money You know like I booked When I really realized it Is like kind of when I don't know who it was It was just like bro Just book your own one nighters
Starting point is 01:29:12 You know do a door deal Book your own one nighters Do local shit You got a big market In San Diego So I did my first like Headlining gig in San Diego And I was like oh
Starting point is 01:29:20 I can pay rent off that shit Yeah And I was like bro If I do one one nighter a month I'm set right Yeah So I kind of talked to Kevin on stage about it and he's like look if i didn't have kids or a wife i would have dipped months ago right yeah so if i was talking to him you know he's i mean he's smart he doesn't waste any money or any of that shit so once he was like oh i would have dipped i was like word i'm out so pretty much yeah i uh i had enough money saved up for like
Starting point is 01:29:43 a couple months rent If shit hit the fan Or whatever And then Right after that I got a manager Like a month later And then I got an agent
Starting point is 01:29:51 And like it's just like Things just like Pop pop pop It's just time Have they done anything for you They gave me a bunch of like Gigs Just college gigs
Starting point is 01:29:57 Oh the agent Yeah the agents Yeah yeah yeah Managers are useless bro I mean my managers The cool part about my manager Is he came from CAA as an agent in the touring world.
Starting point is 01:30:06 So he's like a hybrid. So he just got me a bunch of shit in the beginning. Oh, if they're bringing you money, it's fine. Right. But most of them, I just don't think managers, you need them anymore. Because you can DM anybody you need. Yeah, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:30:20 Who can a manager introduce you to that you can't introduce yourself to? Or your agent can't? Right. Yeah, yeah, introduce you to that you can't introduce yourself to? Or your agent can't? Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, who do you need to talk to? It's true. Yeah, I don't know. But, I mean, I was just so new to everything.
Starting point is 01:30:33 They're like, you need this, you need that. And then, I mean, that whole industry world is so weird. And, I mean, I don't know how much, I mean, I'm sure you've been, you've seen the ways of all this shit. Sure. You're like, had that, didn't have that. And, you know, where you're at now is like, you just need you.'re you are the show you are andrew schultz like that's yeah that's what the club is booking you and then you're in a unique situation too because a lot of like the the guys who come up from social they don't have stand-up chops right and they have to learn it
Starting point is 01:30:57 start yeah yeah they have to learn it afterwards yeah and some can like do it because they're just super talented like uh that Joel McHale guy. Apparently, he just learned stand-up. Really? And I think he probably had some, I don't want to say he had writers, but I don't know. Usually guys who don't do it and then do an hour usually maybe have a little help. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But a lot of these guys don't have a skill to monetize.
Starting point is 01:31:25 Right. You know? And then they're like, their agent will be like, we need to put you on a live show. And they're like, all right, what do I do?
Starting point is 01:31:30 You got an hour to fuck around. Yeah. And bro, an hour is an insane amount of time. I mean, even getting 10 minutes. It's a long time listening to two people talk.
Starting point is 01:31:39 Yeah. I mean, fuck, right now, people are like, man, shut up, Trevor.
Starting point is 01:31:42 We're not cops, you know? But yeah, no, it's crazy. I remember the first time, like, man, shut up, Trevor. God damn, where's our cops, you know? But, yeah, no, it's crazy. I remember the first time, like, early on I had 10 minutes. Some guy was like, yeah, do 15 tonight. And I was like, what? You could light me at 8, though, right? Bro, I remember when I was starting stand-up, I had this little,
Starting point is 01:31:59 it was a little audio recorder, and it looked kind of like a thick pencil. And I would get off stage and i would look at the time yeah and i remember hitting eight minutes and 56 seconds and you're like i'm gonna call it nine yeah you're like messaging everybody getting a half hour you know netflix 15 you know i could stretch five but i mean even just building a tight 10 because i because i was doing stand-up the Bay Area, San Jose. I had, you know, what I call 10 minutes out there. I moved to L.A. with that Bay Area 10.
Starting point is 01:32:30 I came down here and I was like, oh, I got zero minutes, bro. This shit is trash. So to give like a social media guy, you know, an hour, it's fucking nuts. Yeah. Just to, I mean, you say your catchphrases and then, you know, after 10 minutes, people in the audience are like, ah. Yeah. Well, that's why you're in a good situation, because you actually do stand-up. Yeah, and it's great converting, because a comment I get a lot from people is they'll come out and be like,
Starting point is 01:32:57 honestly, bro, I didn't know what the fuck to expect at your show, but we just bought tickets because we support you and we're fans of you. You could have just took a shit on stage for an hour. So that's something that I hit you up when I saw you starting to pop with these other YouTube videos. And I was like, you got it. Insert the stand-up. Stand-up, yeah, yeah, yeah. Even if it's not what they like, even if the videos don't do as well, because it will remind them that you do stand-up well. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:33:23 The people that are interested. Yeah. You might have a video get $3 million, right? And you might have a stand-up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The people that are interested. Yeah. You know, you might have a video get three million, right? And you might have a stand-up video get 300,000. But at least those 300,000 people are like, oh shit, he's really good at stand-up. They saw it, yeah. They're going to come out. Because I'm super self-conscious
Starting point is 01:33:34 about what clips I post about stand-up. Yes. So, I mean, because essentially you're burning material. You're going to be like, hey, this is what I want people to, because when they Google, you know, Trevor Wallace stand-up, that's what's going to pop up before a show or whatever. Yeah. But you need to do it. do it because there's so many people out there that just don't know that you do stand up exactly and that there's layers to it yeah there's
Starting point is 01:33:53 layers to it you know it's like you got to find out oh that's the dude who did that video oh that's his name that's his instagram oh what's the swipe up oh he's in connecticut for like there's so many layers to it but if you pop on a stand-up clip it's there you know it's the first layer and it's on the channel that they already subscribe to exactly because that's what happened with me that's what changed everything with me is like I had all these people to listen to idiots and I didn't know that they didn't know that I did stand-up really like I assumed yeah that once you assume it's like the words and you can tell started calling me a stand-up again really in the last couple years I used to be a podcaster really and i love that because i love doing this but my identity was always hey i'm you know what it is it's like you know like dominicans
Starting point is 01:34:37 they like don't think they're black but like you looking at them like are you yeah you know what i mean like you're kind of black you know what i mean? You're kind of black, you know what I mean? But that's what it was. It was like I saw myself in some way, but my audience didn't. And I needed to show them who I was. And the second I showed them, I started selling out the shows. But had I never put out the videos to those people who knew I did stand-up and they never saw it.
Starting point is 01:35:01 Yeah, but you like do stand-up. That was the only thing I did. But they didn't know. And why would they know? It's like even right now like when i when we go out and we do the tour right i have an hour tour of my material my jokes just the full force flagrancy it's it's crazy but so many people have seen this the the crowd work moments that happen randomly in a show yeah a lot of people come to the shows going yo the whole show is going to be crowd work because they see what you give them exactly are who they give them assume that exactly so it's like important that's why i hit you early i was like keep putting a stand up
Starting point is 01:35:36 in because let both of those grow exactly you know because it is forever different like i know in probably college markets you're gonna you're murder. Are you doing college gigs? Yeah, I've been doing colleges. They're great. And I mean, just getting the full taste of like, because a lot of times you don't have an opener and it's a student and they're like reading off a note card. They're like, influencer, Trevor Wallace. And then the crowd's like, what the fuck?
Starting point is 01:35:59 Is she okay? Yo, say this. This saved me at college shows with the horrible introductions. You say, I don't care really what you say. Just say my name last. Yes. The worst thing is, tonight we got Trevor Wallace. You've seen him on ADD and YouTube and he's an influencer and he has Facebook and Instagram
Starting point is 01:36:17 and TikTok and social media. And you're like. And yeah. And I'm like, what's my cue? Yeah. And the audience doesn't know when And I'm like, what's my cue? Yeah. And the audience doesn't know when to clap because they clapped at your name. No. And now the claps have dissipated.
Starting point is 01:36:30 They're far from the mic. They're scared as timid. I'm like, just give me the mic. Go fucking bring myself up. Like, this next guy. And then just. You don't take anyone on the road? Starting to a little bit.
Starting point is 01:36:39 What about Blau? Blau, yeah, yeah. We're going to do some. We got some shows coming up. So you and Blau do a podcast. Yeah. Stiff Socks, baby. Stiff Socks.
Starting point is 01:36:49 And I have no clue what this fucking podcast is about. I just see the Instagram clips, which I find very funny. And Blaustein, we've spoken about him on the show before. Yeah, the clip. Yeah, did we send you that? No, I got to see it. The clip. So my podcast co-host, you guys pulled that prank on him where you told nobody to laugh in the audience.
Starting point is 01:37:06 Yo, this is so. Did we talk about this on this? Yeah, we did. We did. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So we got to get you that clip. That's what I heard about it. I need that clip so bad.
Starting point is 01:37:12 Blaustein is like an old school, like, you know, he came up with us in standup in New York and he moved to LA to be an actor and shit. And now he's doing podcasts like the rest of us, which is what he should be doing. But yeah, why doesn't he just open for you on the road, man? Is there an ego thing with that? No, we've done shows together. And he's great because he gets the crowd fucking hot. Yeah, dude, he's going to rip, dude.
Starting point is 01:37:33 Oh, yeah. No, it's great. So, yeah, no, it's just our schedules and shit conflicting a little bit. And we want to take the podcast on somewhat of a tour or do a stand-up and then the podcast. But we're trying to figure out that world. So what is the podcast? We just pretty much riff. It's just like up top, we just riff about whatever's going on.
Starting point is 01:37:51 So why does he have a laptop on his lap? I never understood. No matter what you're talking about, it's got nothing to do with that fucking laptop. Oh, the laptop and the glasses is just purely to flex. The glasses? I wear some glasses every once in a while just to bust them out. Get that little intelligente. Oh, like he's some glasses every once in a while just to bust them out. Get that little intelligente.
Starting point is 01:38:07 Oh, he's wearing glasses. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ah, okay. Oh, yeah, what'd you think? I don't know, like you had fancy glasses on the table.
Starting point is 01:38:13 Oh, bro, I mean, the fancy glasses, you know? Yeah, Pepsi cans. But no, he, we'll have people
Starting point is 01:38:19 write in questions and for advice. Right. So it's like, up front, we just riff a little bit and then it's more fan interaction
Starting point is 01:38:24 towards the end where people, we do advice and then we have this one that's called, it's like upfront we just riff a little bit and then it's more fan interaction towards hand where people we do a advice and then we have this one that's called it's like anonymous shit where people just write in something they want to get off their chest right and some dude was like yo I fucking went on a drug deal and let's just say one person didn't come back and I'm like did this motherfucker just confess murder on my podcast and it's like well we're not gonna say name, but shout out to this guy. You know, so it's cool to, it's a lot of just riff. And that's kind of what we found. We toyed with like the different ideas that are beforehand.
Starting point is 01:38:52 But like essentially people just like the riff, you know. Right. And people will say shit like, I love falling asleep to your podcast. Like, is that a compliment? Yeah. Do we need to be louder? Like, what the fuck? So it's like.
Starting point is 01:39:03 I liked what you guys were doing earlier. I'm surprised you guys went away from it, but you would do an activity. Yeah, it was just too much time. We'd do an activity. We'd kind of vlog style it, chop it up, and then we'd talk about it. I thought it was great. It is time consuming. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:39:17 But, yeah, you would eat like a weird ice cream burrito or do some other shit. Yeah, it's just so weird. And we would vlog it, and then we would post that in the YouTube episode. But we found a lot of people would listen on the Apple or Spotify. So you're like, we shot all this fucking shit. I edited this all night. And then you guys just listened to the audio. And they're like, yeah.
Starting point is 01:39:36 So it was a really good idea at first. And I think if we ever get back to that or we start traveling with the podcast, we want to incorporate that a little bit just because it was fun. I mean, like going to a different city and and being experienced with something like i mean you do that too every time you travel somewhere you know you get that footage of it but yeah um you know dropping in that's i mean how much but how much work is that shit it's a lot of work yeah so it's a lot of luckily you got a team around you me and michael's me and michael so yeah you guys are the team well eventually you'll be in the position to like
Starting point is 01:40:04 hire guys and bring them on and yeah we just got a guy for social media so we're just like thank fucking god you did yeah okay good beforehand we're just putting out an hour every week be like all right well hopefully people listen you know yeah no you gotta push yeah i mean but you understand that oh yeah yeah you know so it's like uh just balancing that between my videos and the podcast and stand up and all that world but that's really the three priorities really it's um somebody is gonna be somebody's gonna figure this out and i wanted to talk to you about this because i thought you might have some perspective on it but someone's gonna figure this fucking thing out and they're gonna make so much goddamn money and uh i'm gonna be pissed off if it isn't
Starting point is 01:40:39 me but uh nobody's figured out really what the live podcast show is. Yeah, I don't know what. Nobody knows. It's okay. And we'll talk about it now and try to figure it out. But everybody tries a live podcast and it's not fun. We think it's fun because we're in the same room. But for the people listening.
Starting point is 01:41:09 The only people that I've seen do it fun were, and it was horrible decisions i thought was fun and al was just in dc at their show and he said it was fucking incredible i mean a great show yeah but they've structured it they've gamified it and i haven't seen the live show but just from like the imagery that that uh i'm getting girls gotta eat yeah okay yeah they have a live show but the problem with the podcast is like when you do a live show right when you and i are doing stand-up we're trying to entertain every few seconds right yeah yeah podcast nobody listens to a podcast staring straight at a picture of near you for shit to land right and there's not the pressure of an audience next to us right now so are you yeah but but it's secondary listening right so when you listen to a podcast you're doing your laundry you're driving your car
Starting point is 01:41:54 you're working out the gym you're doing work at work you know the office something like that you're doing something right so it's just there and when the funny thing happens you're like oh my god that's hilarious and when it's not funny Or when it's interesting That's cool Because you're doing work Right When you get into The live podcast setting
Starting point is 01:42:10 And motherfuckers Just talking You're like Well I need to do Some laundry In the crowd I'm shooting off emails Like I usually do
Starting point is 01:42:17 It's soothing Why do I gotta look at you Yeah me and my girl Fucked to this So we got a problem with that I feel like going to sleep I didn't even think about that. It's like, do you play to the crowd or do you riff normally and pretend they're not there?
Starting point is 01:42:28 So that's the tricky thing where the medium is fighting itself, right? Right. I believe that the live podcast show needs structure and games. And usually, comedians, we hate games because we're like, I don't need games. Yeah. I can create the entertainment out of nothing yeah you don't listen to me talk fuck you all right or i'm so good at just talking yeah that i'll make it fun for you listening there right right right but what we do is we we think of bits and we structure these bits and we like workshop them forever and whittle down a 10-minute idea to three minutes of just bang, bang, bang.
Starting point is 01:43:10 We can't do that in the live podcast format. I don't think we should do it in the live podcast format because then it's not replicatable. Then we're essentially doing stand-up just with a few other people. Right. You all got bits you're running or somebody cried bench or something. Oh, I got a bit from fucking 2013 about that. Then you're running bits and your co-host is looking at you like, is this motherfucker running bits right now?
Starting point is 01:43:26 You're just doing team stand-up. Exactly. Right? Exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that is one way of doing it. I'm sure some people do it that way and that would work. What were you saying?
Starting point is 01:43:33 No, no. I was just going to interject in terms of horrible. And I also went to 85 South. Yes. Oh, yeah? And so I feel 85 South, it's too much crowd engagement. So that's, I love those guys. These guys are Are they riffed
Starting point is 01:43:46 This is the new Kingsville comedy They post their clips And they do millions of views And their whole thing is riffing But There might be a situation Where
Starting point is 01:43:53 Their fans seem to love it Right I feel Horrible has a good balance Of fan engagement And then their own shit Where it's just them talking You are engaged with them Their only problem
Starting point is 01:44:02 That I saw at the show Was Horrible decision, that is. A horrible decision is that they have to... Whenever there's a new segment, they need to control the crowd. So if they have a high-energy segment and then they want to just talk,
Starting point is 01:44:16 the crowd is still... The energy is going. So now they start talking and shit like that. They have to... It's a tricky thing, but I swear to God, what is the one thing that's horrible about stand-up? It's lifespan. Right?
Starting point is 01:44:28 You tell a joke, that joke is no longer funny to your crowd. Yeah. Right? And you feel it. And you feel it when you tell the same joke to the same crowd or the same people who have seen it before. Yeah. It's one of actually the great things about like the type of content you're putting out on YouTube is I can watch the dad thing multiple times. Yeah. It has a longer shelf life than a joke yeah but a joke usually because it's
Starting point is 01:44:50 it's more uh relatable and engaging than a uh joke usually has one big switch you have 10 to 15 to 20 punch lines in this tiny little video where the joke is this same length, only set up, set up, set up, set up, punch. You know where the punch is coming. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. Right? So what I'm trying to think about, and maybe we could just brainstorm right here, but if we could create live podcasts and actually create the show, right,
Starting point is 01:45:18 that's where we become rock stars because we have a replicatable format which we can be funny and entertaining in without losing material yeah it's almost like you'd want to be like down in front of like a double-sided mirror like you don't know they're there but they're on a fucking giant audience behind and we're just doing this right here but there's a there's a that might even be it or and then they're just over there laughing their ass off and we have because i mean if you hear laughter that's gonna fuck with your mentality you You're going to be like, oh, that's. You're going to lean into it. Yeah, you're going to try to tag.
Starting point is 01:45:45 That's funny. And be like, yeah, y'all ever been in Connecticut? And they're like, who are you talking to, you know? So, if you get, because that's, I mean. But that's voyeuristic, right? Now they're watching and we don't know we're being watched, but we are. Yeah. But I think so many of these people come out to the show just because they want to be in the room with us.
Starting point is 01:46:01 Yeah, that's true. You listen to someone for, you know, six hours a week, it's like, oh, you're in my town? I got to see you, bro. I got to dap you up. I got to do whatever. Yeah, exactly. What Horrible Decisions did when I hosted their show, it was really interesting.
Starting point is 01:46:14 I went up and I hosted, and they asked me to play this game called Biggest Whore in the Room or something. Biggest Hoe in the Room. And what happens is everybody stands up. It's already interesting. Everybody stands up, and then I say slutty things that get increasingly slutty.
Starting point is 01:46:29 And if you haven't done it, you sit down. Oh, like I've never or whatever. Yes. Never have I ever. Never have I ever. It's the same shit. Right? But dude, it's hilarious.
Starting point is 01:46:38 Oh, probably murders. And this is why it's great. I was thinking this is why it's great. It presents situations where our natural comedic abilities get to come into play yeah so instead of us having to create a premise and execute it and then punch it and then tag it yeah the funny is here here yeah we're responding bro i mean it's the same thing when like somebody yells something out at dumb at a show people how do you deal with hecklers like it's not hard to deal with because the people that yell out deaf
Starting point is 01:47:02 usually aren't the most intelligent yeah they're they're going to be the dummies. They throw something out, right? And it's just so wild and dumb and you're just quick on your feet. Boom. You're great on your feet. So how do we create the right throw outs? Right. That's the structure we need to figure out.
Starting point is 01:47:16 How do we create the right interactions from the audience, not the wrong ones? Because when we go crowd participation or ask questions, then everybody starts talking to each other. It's too disorganized. People are yelling out random shit. But within the games, and there could be multiple, within the games, we could create those moments where our comedic sensibilities will be really flexed. What is that? When we know what that is, we're on tour nonstop. And people come back like the fucking Backstreet boys they go to all three shows yeah bruce springsteen they go to all
Starting point is 01:47:50 four that will happen and it's a new show every time when you do it because you're not running you don't know what they're gonna say exactly yeah so they dropped that on 85 they put that on spotify and apple and all this just just like it's a normal show yeah but they're just riffing in the moment right which is great and that's awesome that you can do it. But it also leaves a situation where like, all right, well, what if that riff isn't going? What if the audience isn't feeling like... Right.
Starting point is 01:48:12 I feel like there's a way to give a little more structure to it and then control, you know, the variables. Yeah. I mean, they got to figure it out. But yeah, I think you were saying, like once somebody finds that perfect, like set up the one, two, three. I mean, yeah, it's great.
Starting point is 01:48:26 Not everybody's going to be able to do that. Right. You know, like, if I got to send some podcasts on the road where they're not even comedians and they're not, like, those guys are genius at riffing. They're really genius. Oh, their shows are, like, it's hard to see a crowd, like, go that fucking nuts. Like, over some, like, alt guy in Echo Park who's telling, like, quick one-liners off a haiku poem. And people are like, oh, nice, nice, nice. So to see the crowd love the level they got is like they got it.
Starting point is 01:48:51 I mean, DC and Carlos, those motherfuckers got it. They got it. So funny. So what about the people that don't? There are people that got big followings that don't got it. They're like history podcasts. You getting standing O's talking about fucking shit that already happened? Yep.
Starting point is 01:49:04 You remember the Civil War? No no it's fucking not alive yet how are we yeah standing oh bro so that's the thing we got to figure out like like david dobrik right if he wanted to go on tour he'd sell out bro he could sneeze in the crowd would fucking just die but what if we gave him structure yeah what if we're like here's your, and here's how we're going to do these things and create your show. Here's this structure. Here's this platform. Go on the road. We'll just take a cut for building it out.
Starting point is 01:49:32 Oh, I see what you're saying. See what I'm saying? You're like the showrunner of a podcast. I'm Barnum Bailey, dog. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what I'm saying? I'm not playing. You're running a place.
Starting point is 01:49:41 PT Barnum? What's Barnum Bailey? That's not the circus? I think it is. Whatever. I don't know what it was. I thought it was a producer or something. One of them shits.
Starting point is 01:49:51 But the point is, I don't know. There's something that we're all leaving. We're all leaving it out. Yeah. We're leaving meat on the bone. Yeah. I think that's really what it is. Think about most people listen to podcasts.
Starting point is 01:50:01 Most podcasts cannot tour because they don't know what the fuck to do. No. And once we figure out a way for them to tour why is there tv anymore that shit is wild you know i mean even like uh you know sean evans found a way to do hot ones live he did yeah he does he did hot ones live he's done a few times he just did it with the baby at a complex con son the crab fishermen got a live show. Yeah, I mean it's- I figure that is an easy show to execute live.
Starting point is 01:50:30 What's that? The hot ones. Yeah. Because it's just like question, answer, and you just waiting to see their reaction with the hot shit. Yeah. It's like an easy- It's interesting because it's not like a funny show. It depends on who's on it.
Starting point is 01:50:41 So it doesn't have the expectation. Right. But the hotness of the wing creates the tension Oh, yeah willing to like but stay glued I like watching that show on like a phone or a laptop because you feel it's close the cameras on you But like imagine being the fucking nosebleeds being like Is that the hot way? What's awesome?
Starting point is 01:50:59 Turn into my fucking grandma. What show this? Hot what? Wings? Who's flying here? There is a certain point Where like distance matters Yeah Like with live shows Like 100% I've never seen a
Starting point is 01:51:15 A show at the garden As stand up Right But I imagine I have You have Yeah Thoughts
Starting point is 01:51:22 I saw Kevin Hart Luckily I had Good seats So I was close I saw Kevin Hart. Luckily, I had good seats, so I was close. Oh, okay. That doesn't count. Yeah, I know. But I'm pretty sure if you're far, you're just looking at the Jumbo Trunk. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:51:33 And it's so like, there's no closeness about it. Because even when you go to a concert, if you're far, you're looking at the Jumbo Trunk. When I was in Buffalo, Metallica was performing across the street from the comedy club. God damn, it're so white. Super white. And I went all in. I love Buffalo. Yeah, it's a great city.
Starting point is 01:51:49 And that's the city for Metallica. Like, the whitest of whites are coming out. It was founded Buffalo Wings and Metallica fans. That's the two things I know them for. So, I'm on the floor because the guy that was opening for them is a comic. Okay. And he asked if he could do a little guest spot on my show. So, he brings me on.
Starting point is 01:52:10 Metallica is a comic? No, no, no. Yeah, yeah. Bro, who's fucking doing that gig? Big Jay Oakerson? No, Jim Brewer. Oh, yeah. Jim Brewer.
Starting point is 01:52:19 And then there's another guy that I'm forgetting his name. I feel bad right now. But he was opening for them as well. Wow. And Jim has tons of heavy metal songs. Not songs, but bits and shit like that. So people know him. The heavy metal people know him.
Starting point is 01:52:33 Point is, I'm on the floor, and while it was super cool to get into it, it's so vast. It doesn't feel like a concert. You know what I mean? When you're at a fucking concert where you're like squished in with people. Yeah. That feels like you're in the middle of something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That feels like you're part of it.
Starting point is 01:52:51 And I wonder if that same thing happens with stand-up. You're like, you're in a fucking booth with a glass thing. You've got shrimp cocktail in the back. There's no crowd control. Like back in the day, one of my mom's favorite comics was Amy Schumer. All right. She, think how you feel. You know, her son does stand up, but she's like, I want to see Schumer.
Starting point is 01:53:11 All right. And Mark Norman opened and he crushed. And so I'm, but this was at the forum. Shout out to Mark, man. Yeah. This was at the forum. No, Mark crushed. He like, yeah.
Starting point is 01:53:23 But this was at the forum and I'm in the way back fucking seats. Your mom brought you to see Amy Schumer? She wanted to go. I bought her tickets for her birthday. Okay. Yeah, this was in like maybe 2014, 2015. So you purchased Amy Schumer tickets? You know, I purchased Mark Norman tickets.
Starting point is 01:53:39 That's what's up. And Amy dropped in and did an hour with her name on the tour and the ticket. But I went for Mark Norman, you know. I bought Mark Norman tickets, so yeah, man. I mean, look, I went in there as a comic being like, yeah, let me see what you got. It's like, she doesn't give a fuck what I got. She got millions of dollars that night. Yes, facts.
Starting point is 01:53:56 But there's no crowd control in an arena. Like, there's people just eating a hot dog. A guy drops a hot dog. Now it hits the back of my neck. You think, like, in a club, somebody would be like, what the fuck's going on over here? Stop. But out there, it's just so much noise when a joke hits. You don't know what the fuck's happening.
Starting point is 01:54:13 You think a joke lands, but it could be some dude just got his ass beat in the corner. That's what they're laughing at. There's no connectivity, which is nice, but the clubs out here, I did a few spots in town, and it's like the club's like 80 people to 100 people max it's like it's in there it's packed you if you're funny you're funny if if a joke doesn't hit at a new york club you feel it new york comedy club 24th street location did you perform at that one uh i did broadway and i did stand in new york so no okay you didn't need to brag New York Comedy Club
Starting point is 01:54:48 24th Street location small little black box room 80, 100 people fit there I mean like 100 ram packed probably it's my favorite room
Starting point is 01:54:57 in the city hands down yeah because you have so much control of the room right nobody feels confident in that room you get in these bigger rooms they start to like because you have so much control of the room.
Starting point is 01:55:05 Right. Nobody feels confident in that room. You get in these bigger rooms, they start to be in the back of the crowd, and all of a sudden they feel a little confident to say something or whisper or talk to their friend, etc. This room, you could see everybody in their fucking eyes, and they're all around you. And because of that, that tension is built up,
Starting point is 01:55:22 and everybody's super invested. They're in it. They're fucking in it, dude. Yeah. I like that. Yeah, man. It's my favorite room. This week was interesting with the New York Comedy Festival.
Starting point is 01:55:32 Did you do shows for it? Yeah. So my show was a part of, I did, there we go. Fucking this asshole. I did two shows at Gramercy. So that was fucking great, man. But I just did spots around town That weren't a part of the festival Thanks for inviting me bro
Starting point is 01:55:46 I appreciate that dude I live a block away dude I really appreciate you man What an asshole man Man I was posting about it What an asshole dog Shit I don't see those posts
Starting point is 01:55:55 I was opening for Amy Schumer That's what it was Oh that's what it is Is she down to the Gramercy now? Yeah Things ain't going that well From the forum to the Gramercy dog? Yeah. Things ain't going that well? From the Forum to the Gramercy talk?
Starting point is 01:56:07 Yeah, but, nah, I did those shows, but from what I was hearing from other New York people, they're like, oh man, all these writers are in town,
Starting point is 01:56:13 this type shit, so, I mean, I don't know how it was on your end, but I think all the shows got impacted by just a bunch of outside people
Starting point is 01:56:18 for the festival, right? What do you mean? Because you're like, it was interesting this week with the festival. Oh, I thought crowds sucked this week
Starting point is 01:56:24 because all the casuals come out oh i see casual fans yeah yeah so like a casual comedy fan like they just don't understand what what they're thinking is like you know in like montreal there's like jazz fests so all of a sudden people who've never listened to jazz their entire life are like we should go check out some jazz yeah got you and since it's new york comedy festival there are people like, we should see some comedy this weekend. Go to a festival. Yeah. So every club was sold out.
Starting point is 01:56:49 Got you. And now you have these people who don't truly understand comedy. So when you're saying, you know, me, like I like to push, right? I like to say fucked up shit. And I got to deal with these fucking cowards groaning. Really? Oh, dude. And you can just feel that it's not like that New York comedy audience that loves comedy, you know?
Starting point is 01:57:03 And it gets it. Right. Like it gets what we're doing here. Like, if you've got a comic club on a random Tuesday night at 11.30 p.m., like, you're like, just bring it. Exactly. Give it a raw. So you felt that with people being like, oh.
Starting point is 01:57:14 Oh, yeah. And then I get upset because I find them to be cowards. Yeah. And I just start calling them cowards. I go, you're all cowards. One of the funniest clips I just saw was Tim Dillon going off on a New on a new york audience you see that yeah you fucking all side just laying it to him it was like a mini philly rant from bill burr it was oh my god it's just like a one minute clip just shitting on him dude it is it is yeah he's yeah check out that clip i think tim posted on
Starting point is 01:57:37 his instagram but it's really funny the minute of him just going in on new york audience it was probably it was so true man it's just like it man. It's just like the things that they'll fucking groan. Groaning is the most pussy thing. Do you know what I mean? Also, what value does that add? No, I need to know when in life you groan. Have you groaned by yourself at home? Maybe a heavy sigh.
Starting point is 01:58:01 If they take too long at Starbucks, I might be like, No, no. It's an exaggerated diss motherfucker right here. I groan Starbucks. I might be like, No, no. But it's an exaggerated diss motherfucker right here. I groaned today on the taxi ride. Oh, yeah. Because I gave the guy the address, and he's like, should I just drop you over there?
Starting point is 01:58:11 And I'm like, is that the fucking address that I gave you? Dude, Uber drivers love doing that shit. Why do you suggest them where the fuck to drop me? I've never been here. Dude, I'm clearly wearing a flannel. It's 40 degrees out. I'm freezing.
Starting point is 01:58:20 I got in this so I could go from door to door. And he's trying to avoid the whole bull traffic, you know, the bull statue shit over there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I wish Akash was here because I only tipped him 30 cents and I was paranoid to do that. Like my white kill. Did you like round up if it was like, you know, $9.70 so you made it 10 or you were just like, it's 10 bucks, here's an extra 30? I gave him the change. Okay.
Starting point is 01:58:43 I got a quarter and a nickel. Okay, gotcha yeah if you just psychopath yeah if you round up you're good but if you're just like here's 30 cents bitch it's like bro kill me at that point just tell the sniper on the top of the fucking tower you took a yellow or i took a yellow bro okay i'm like oh i never said uber they have like dollar amounts yo it's oh yeah so you know Uber goes like, what would you like to tip? I'd like to skip. That's what I'm going to do.
Starting point is 01:59:09 That's what I'm going to do right now. The dude did this today. I have all my suitcase because I'm going to the airport. And he opens the trunk. And he gets out. All the bags are in. But he gets out. He's like, you good?
Starting point is 01:59:18 You need anything? I'm like, I know how to load a trunk here. Just pop the shit. Oh, yeah, yeah. But they try to be a little bit cabbish. That's why I did Al on the road. Whenever Al picks up the camera bag, I'm like, you got it? You got it?
Starting point is 01:59:29 You got it. When your friend is moving, you're like, yo, you need help or you good? Or you good means I'm not going to help you. I'm suggesting how you should feel. Oh, yeah, exactly. But you good, right? You good. You good, right?
Starting point is 01:59:41 Yeah, man. Yeah, that's the thing about the uh the the driver like star system is it is gender bias because a woman will never help you with your bags like a woman uber driver have you ever no sometimes i'll wait just to see you're such a dick dude is that when you let out a side that's an appropriate time let me tell you that's when the groan comes out. Let me tell you, I'll wait, right? I'll come from the airport, and I'll go. I'll see the Uber driver's a girl, right? And I'll go to the back, to the trunk, and I'll just stand there, right?
Starting point is 02:00:15 She goes out the window. It's unlocked. You're like, oh. No, no, no. This is what she did. This was brilliant. And I'm waiting. I'm like, I'm going to make this bitch get out this fucking Uber and earn her fifth star,
Starting point is 02:00:23 right? She waits for a second, right? And then all of a sudden, the trunk just goes, boom, boom. And she pops the trunk but doesn't get out. Right. So she's basically saying, you're going to put your own fucking luggage in the back seat. But I'm cool with that. I get it.
Starting point is 02:00:36 Or are you like, I need hands on. See, I'm more like, who have you become, son? I want the whole service, bro. Who have you become, son? I got to pay her more? Like, I got to pay her more, son? I want the whole service, bro. Who have you become, son? I got to pay her more? Like, I got to pay her more? Why? I need the whole service.
Starting point is 02:00:49 You're not even paying her more. You're saying for her to earn the fifth star? She got to earn the fifth, bro. Hey, she got to earn that fifth, bro. This is why tipping is out of hand now. Yeah, well, I see that. It's out of hand now because we just tipped for no fucking reason. I'm more likely to give Somebody like three stars
Starting point is 02:01:05 If they got the windows Down with no AC Use the AC Fuck the planet Why am I gonna be In the back Yeah yeah yeah You ain't got a phone charger
Starting point is 02:01:12 Nothing You got an android up front I'm like make Accommodate I like the chargers I'm in on the chargers I am always low on battery So like
Starting point is 02:01:20 If you got a charger Back there five stars You total the car while I'm in it But I got 98% battery Five stars I don't give a shit I'm very it, but I got 98% battery, five stars. I don't give a shit, you know? I'm very easy to work with. Yeah, you got to have the chargers.
Starting point is 02:01:29 Water, I don't really care about that much. It's weird. I don't even take the waters, bro. They're always the tiny little ones, too. Yeah. They're jamming the crevice of a seat. They're all warm. I'm like, I'm good.
Starting point is 02:01:38 I don't need hydration like that. Yeah, don't fuck with the waters, really. But you got to open that trunk, bro. Yeah. You got to get out. Yeah. Get out the car what do you what would you end up giving a rating say again what rating did you give her i'm be honest with you she's swimming in the fucking ocean right now with the fish i didn't rate her bro
Starting point is 02:01:55 oh yeah i didn't rate her yeah because you know what right after the rating comes the tip oh yeah so if you skip the rating right because i'm like the guilt to the tip where they're I don't like the guilt of the tip, where they're like, how much should you? And they're bold. It's like what you were saying. It's like $1, $5, $25 Visa gift card. It's like, bro. Downstairs at Gregory's Coffee, the suggested tip starts at $20, then goes up to 25%. What happened to 18?
Starting point is 02:02:21 What happened to nothing? Do your job. What happened to do your fucking job? That's your job. To make the coffee. You don't make it nicer. I'm not getting extra milk. What the fuck are you doing for a tip?
Starting point is 02:02:33 You're getting paid to serve coffee. Why the fuck? Why the fuck do I have to tip you to do your job? But the funniest part is they try to make you feel bad. But the no tip button is always off like a little loner, like a kid eating his lunch by himself. It's like 15, 20, 25. Then the corner's like, or you could do no tip. It's like little puppy dogs staring at you.
Starting point is 02:02:51 It's quivering. Yeah, exactly. It's shaking. There's teardrops. It's got a sign. You could do no tip, but then I got to tell my ma and pa that I don't have a tip money. You eating porridge right now? Why the tip button?
Starting point is 02:03:03 We got to really look at this tip thing. I know I keep coming back to it, but it's too much. No, it is a lot. It's everything is tip. Right, exactly. I told you, if they don't do any work, especially coffee, if I get cold brew and all they're doing is just pouring it out of the thing, nah, no tip.
Starting point is 02:03:17 You're not doing anything. You're doing nothing. Gravity. It's gravity. You just push the button and the water comes down. Nah, but I'm talking about cold brew. It's already prepared the night before. It's gravity. You just push the button and the water comes down. Nah, but I'm talking about cold brew. It's already prepared the night before. It's cold already.
Starting point is 02:03:29 So all they're doing is just pouring it right out of the container. Oh, you're from the little thermos shit. Even with the fucking lattes, I didn't ask for the art. I think that's so stupid. It's like painting shit in my foam and then I got to pay you for this painting I don't even fucking want. I don't want a leaf. I don't want none of that shit. It's infuriating to me.
Starting point is 02:03:47 And then they look at you with their little, they want the approval from you for their art. You spit on it. Did you like? Did you like? Bro, what I love doing. Get that fucking leaf out of here. Is this autumn?
Starting point is 02:03:57 I don't give a shit if it's fall in fucking Times Square. Real talk, I like putting the sugar on top of it without even looking at it. I don't do sugar anymore, but back when I would do sugar, I'd maintain eye contact with them. I'd be like, hey, thanks so much without even looking at their artwork. And I'd pour the sugar on the top and then start mixing and then look back down. No, so you ruined it. It was the Star of David.
Starting point is 02:04:18 What the fuck? I noticed the Jewish holidays were coming up and I noticed the nose on you. Anti-Semite! I'm screaming racial shit. Nah, that's so funny. That's how I know I'm in New York. You look at art.
Starting point is 02:04:29 It's a black power fist. That's what you got to do. Put your fucking, what is it, your wokeness in your foam. Yeah, bro. That's how I know I'm in New York. They give you nice art, and you're like, the fuck is this shit? It's a fucking groan on top of the coffee right there. Don't put nothing on my foam.
Starting point is 02:04:43 What are other things that they expect tips at? Just about everything. Yo, can I be honest with you? Let's talk about this. And I know, and shout out to my guy, because I got a great hairstylist. He likes to be called a hairstylist. And he hooks it up.
Starting point is 02:04:59 That's a tip. You got it. He hooks it up, bro. My man is nice. He charges. I mean, he works with super famous people. He hooks it up. He's is nice He charges I mean he works with like You know like super famous people He hooks it up
Starting point is 02:05:07 He's an asshole Alex love you But we gotta stop tipping hair folks Right Yeah Like think about it I don't tip him We just do a little side deal
Starting point is 02:05:17 Right But why are we tipping somebody To cut the hair I would just include it in the price I'd be like one shot You set your price Yeah exactly But why do I need to like shouldn't you be trying your best? Right like I'm mind-blown like damn
Starting point is 02:05:33 Give me a fade. Oh His little things they'll do like if they give me the hot towel or the the clean razor on the back I'm like, I'm impressed. I'm like, here's a five. But you're paying for that. Yeah. But I'm more likely to tip for everything. I'm more likely to tip them. It's crazy. Do you tip the guy you buy a car from?
Starting point is 02:05:51 Do you tip the Avis, bitch? No, fuck no. When you get a fucking Tahoe on the road, are you like, yo, thank you so much for telling me to go to slot 639? No. No, right? No. It's why are we tipping for everything?
Starting point is 02:06:02 I don't know. It is interesting. Don't other countries just not tip? They get it. They get it. And you know what? The service is a little worse. For food.
Starting point is 02:06:12 I don't mind tipping for food. Yeah, but there's still shitty ass service and people are like suggested. I went to brunch out here the other day. That motherfucker didn't give a shit about me, bro. Sorry. I went to lunch and I had a T-bone steak there we go baby and I dipped that shit
Starting point is 02:06:27 in Copenhagen long cut you know yeah I only eat steaks with tuna bagel no the guy didn't give a shit he was just like he like dropped like literally
Starting point is 02:06:35 check dropped tossed it could have hit my fucking omelette and the first suggested tip is 25% bro I'm not good at math I'm taking the suggestions
Starting point is 02:06:44 I'm like, sure. Oh, no, no. Round up. No, we're not doing 25. We're not going 25. 20 is my limit. But even 20. Say what?
Starting point is 02:06:53 20 is like, you know how you always have one friend that works in the service industry and they're like, I tip 48%. What do you fucking work here? They're always like, you got to treat a server nicely. People are ridiculous with this. 48% is, you don't have to treat How nicely we have to treat But it's always people
Starting point is 02:07:07 In the service industry That are like Yeah I give them A fucking labradoodle puppy After each meal I've been in the service industry And I know how shitty it is Okay
Starting point is 02:07:16 But why It's just mind boggling to me That it's just getting out of hand No it for real is It's getting out of hand We need to pull it back Don't we need to pull it back It's like
Starting point is 02:07:24 No No because I'm on the road and people listen to this shit. So I love all the servers No, I like listen. I love all the real talk. No you do tip So that's what you gotta chill with is not tipping bro. I had a nightmare about tipping bro Like the people that work in the comedy club. I had a nightmare about tipping bro. What happened you woke up black? Son? I get the black struggle man. I really think I get the black struggle man i really think i'm a black man bro i think i'm a black man because you tipped the driver 30 cents this morning that's because he was brown bro he gets it bro us us black and browns we get this shit though we don't gotta conform to your white shit tipping tipping 49% on a fucking taxi ride. All you did was that.
Starting point is 02:08:06 You did that for work. That's the total work. Hold on. This is that. To drive me to my location, you did that, and then sometimes you did that, and then move your wrist centimeters. I got to tip you 20%. Oh, bro, you don't make this yellow light?
Starting point is 02:08:21 No tip, all right? Son. Are you watching Uber drivers miss a right turn? They look at the app, then look back like nothing happened i'm in the back like i can see where we going there's a map in front of us bro son when the guy said to me is it okay if i drop you off here the balls the balls on you to drop me off at not where I exactly. Do you think I didn't know where I wanted to go? Is that? You think I was lost? Yeah, I'll round up locations.
Starting point is 02:08:48 I was going to 40th Street, but let's go 37, you know? I'm trying to walk up that croissant from yesterday. Yeah, we're not negotiating. This is not the art of the deal. Can you imagine? Drop me off at 40th. He's like, what about 38th? You're like, all right.
Starting point is 02:08:59 Meet me at 39th. 39th? Yeah. Fair enough, yeah. Yeah, we got to figure out the tipping, man. It's getting a little absurd. It's getting a little absurd. We're getting a little absurd. Tip for food.
Starting point is 02:09:07 Tip for food. Drink is not. Do we tip bartenders? Yeah, I do. Dollar per drink. Yeah, dollar per drink is standard. I think I stand it. That makes sense.
Starting point is 02:09:15 Okay, here's the thing. Now drinks are fucking 16 bucks, 17 bucks. You get your bill for drinks is $80. You're going to tip $4 on $80? Oh, shit. I'm thinking like when I'm at the bar, you're just ordering per drink. That's why they get you to put the card down. Because you got to tip based on the bill.
Starting point is 02:09:33 Oh, shit. Right, right, right. Because if it's a one-off and you scrabble some change, they're like, yeah. Maybe $2 tops. Look, I don't mind tipping. These two guys brought my couch Up my fucking stairs Eight floors Jesus Christ
Starting point is 02:09:46 $200 $200 Wait that was the tip Or that's how much They charged to do that I think that was the tip You think Well
Starting point is 02:09:55 It wasn't in It wasn't in the price It wasn't in the price Okay Right But they were like We'll do it for $200 That's the tip
Starting point is 02:10:03 That's outside of it They were just No no They told you They told you But they were like, we'll do it for $200. That's a tip. That's outside of it. No, no. They told you they'll do it for $200. So that's how much they charge for doing it. So you did not tip them. That's the tip. You didn't tip. That's the tip.
Starting point is 02:10:16 I tipped them that. You're a piece of shit. I tipped them that, bro. Nah, that's the tip. They all shout you out. Nah, that's the tip. What about money? That's a lot of tip.
Starting point is 02:10:22 Yo, $200 is great. That's a lot of tip. That's a lot of tip because- a lot of tip That's a lot of tip Because Also a lot of floors Eight floors? That's eight floors They were sweating bro That shit was
Starting point is 02:10:31 Worth every penny You were sitting there Eating a cup of noodles Just being like Yeah that's my son down there I was sitting there with Alex I was like yo you got it? You good?
Starting point is 02:10:38 You good? Y'all got it right? The bags are good? Alright cool you got it He's pushing it with his forehead You good? There's lemonade up here When you get to the top.
Starting point is 02:10:45 But you good? Tell them how many floors were left. I feel like they couldn't do math. I was like, two more, guys. Two more. You're lying to them. You know when you're 20 minutes away? You're like, yo, five minutes away.
Starting point is 02:10:54 You're like, yeah, there's one more floor. Bro, we're on the first floor. Yeah, well. One more building, should I say. One more building. But that's a tip. That wasn't a tip. No, because they're just supposed to bring it. Any labor, yeah. Labor is a tip. wasn't a tip No because they're just Supposed to bring it
Starting point is 02:11:05 Any labor Yeah Labor is a tip Certain things What? No but you asked them Beforehand Do you remember when we were
Starting point is 02:11:11 Going to the museum And the bitch had a fucking A tip jar at the museum Oh yeah that was wild I almost took that jar And fucking emptied it On the ground I almost spiked that
Starting point is 02:11:21 Fucking tip jar What are you doing? Dude you might have Visited me in a past life Cause bitch move here, but I used to work at a frozen yogurt store in high school. Every stoner did. Yeah. And there was a tip jar by the counter, but it was a self-serve one where you make it
Starting point is 02:11:33 and then they weigh it and you pay for it. This guy looks at the tip jar and he goes, why do people tip you? And I was just like, bro, I don't know. I just put it there. Son, what are we doing? What's going on? I don't know. What is happening?
Starting point is 02:11:44 Truly, what is happening what truly what is happening i think you could just put a tip yeah we feel guilty we feel it's the same way like you know what you've been to venice beach right yeah everybody's selling mixtapes and you're like no i don't want and the guy's like 20 dollars like no i'm good he goes okay 15 you're like okay fine it's like a guilt and you just i have never felt that oh i i don't know but i got i know people like that they give in because they didn't grow up with black people they got seven interaction with a black person. That's what they are.
Starting point is 02:12:05 They never listen to. Those people right there you're talking to are from Sweden, and they've never met a black person. And then a black person comes up to them and goes, can I have some money? And they go, here's my, yes. That's all it is. I know exactly.
Starting point is 02:12:17 They got 70s albums that are sitting there they never listen to. It's probably all just ripped from LimeWire. None of it's their actual music. Yeah, they know. But yeah, it's the same. It's like a guilt type thing. So when that giant screen comes up, it's our actual music, you know? Yeah, they know. But, yeah, but it's the same, it's like a guilt type thing. So when that giant screen comes up, it's like, tip 30%?
Starting point is 02:12:29 Yeah. But I drew a fucking Toronto maple leaf on your coffee? Yeah, I'm not doing it. You're just like, mm, okay. But now I don't feel guilty anymore. Now I feel resentment. Right. Now I'm angry.
Starting point is 02:12:40 Yeah. It's gone over. It's on the other side. There's also certain jobs I'd rather tip like or something like if like there's no turbulence on a flight, here's a five big. Yeah. But if you're like you said, pouring some cold brew, it's like, bro, let me do it. Can we actually talk about this?
Starting point is 02:12:56 Do strippers get paid by the club? They got to pay the club to work that night. That's what I remember. Ah, that's right. That's right. That's right. Which is also kind of crazy. I did a little ethnography on that that I do remember.
Starting point is 02:13:05 Okay, then we could tip them. Because I was also about to say, if they're on salary- Oh, wow. Everything is added value? What are we tipping? You got benefits, girl. Yeah, what are we tipping for? That's the point.
Starting point is 02:13:17 I didn't even think about that. Yeah, they've got to pay the club, which is kind of wild to work. Yeah, that's right. It's like they're barbers. You know how a barber has to pay for his chair? Yeah, you rent the chair, you rent the pole. But they're tipping out the DJ, they're paying the club, which is kind of wild to work. Yeah, that's right. It's like they're barbers. You know how like a barber has to pay for his chair, but they're tipping out the, they rent the pole, but they're tipping out the DJ, they're paying the club, they do a whole thing. That's wild. Yeah.
Starting point is 02:13:32 I went out to this steak restaurant last night called Smith and Walensky's. Have you heard of this? It's like a good old-fashioned Luger's, etc. And basically same idea, but in Manhattan. And we were there for an hour and the tip was $40, right?
Starting point is 02:13:50 And I'm assuming he had four other tables like mine, maybe five at that time. It was probably about- Yeah, at that time. Yeah. So we're talking about $200 an hour. He's got to tip out a little bit. Let's say he walks with low end, 50% of his money. Guy's making $100 an hour.
Starting point is 02:14:10 I mean, people that work in that industry and work at a nice restaurant, the tips, like, you are making, and it's all cash. Cash, bro. You ain't got to report any of that. You just stashed out your house. You ain't got to tax any of that shit. It's just, I don't know, do you? You have to report any of that shit?
Starting point is 02:14:24 What? Tips? Here's my thing. A little bit. You have to report any of that shit? What? Tips? Here's my thing. A little bit. You have to report the tips. They'll come for you. But my thing is, working at a cheap restaurant or an expensive restaurant, the action of the waiter doesn't change.
Starting point is 02:14:41 The price of the item changes. Right. And we tip based on the price of the item changes right and we tip based on the price of the item yeah but we should be tipping based on the action of the waiter I'm walking in the kitchen but who's the chef to cook this shit here's 20 bucks this was amazing we don't even tip him no I mean what do they see they don't even they probably don't even know tips exists like oh you're getting cash for my fucking excellence? That's it.
Starting point is 02:15:06 He said medium well. What does that even mean? And I fucking did it and I don't see a dollar? Fam, we're not even tipping the right person. But usually the head chef is probably getting paid more than the manager. Yeah, the head chef's getting real money. Yeah, they're getting real money, yeah. He's making real money.
Starting point is 02:15:18 True. Okay? But he's got to be hot his whole life. He earns every penny. He works. Imagine your whole life 60 hours a week You're fucking standing in front of a stove
Starting point is 02:15:28 God bless those Mexicans I mean the salt bae dude He does that shit for your table Real talk Mexicans Maybe that's why we make you walk here To like get used to the heat You know what I mean
Starting point is 02:15:42 So by the time you're in the kitchen You're like I've been here before It's nothing. We got to get you acclimated to what you're about to do. Dude, imagine they had Mexicans in the bottom of the Titanic putting a coal in. So you know how fast the Titanic would have blasted through that iceberg?
Starting point is 02:16:00 So that iceberg wouldn't stand a chance if you had Javier and Hector down there. Fuck it, let's go full speed ahead, captain. That's the whole movie is five minutes they break through the iceberg. Just straight through. Like a submarine. Goes on to land. Shit, man.
Starting point is 02:16:19 I will say, you know the Salt Bae dude? Yes. His restaurant, he comes out and does this shit. I'll tip for that. That's extra. Oh, it's got to be. His restaurant, he comes out and does this shit. I'll tip for that. That's extra. Oh, it's got to be. I mean, he probably charged for one. Meaning he's doing more than what is provided on the menu.
Starting point is 02:16:30 He's going above and beyond, so we'll tip you. Right, but if you refill my water twice and you want 48%, we're not doing that. Yeah. We're not. Yo, you know what's some real shit? Do you wash your elbows? Wash my elbow? Yeah.
Starting point is 02:16:43 At a restaurant? No. Wait, what? I mean just in general. In real life? I don't know. Not really, right? Wash my elbow? Yeah. At a restaurant? No. Wait, what? I mean just in general. I don't, not. Not really, right? I don't think so. Like my man is doing all this with all the confidence.
Starting point is 02:16:54 But he's doing all this with the confidence that his elbows are clean, son. Sweat rolls down the back arm. He's been like this all day at the park. You know what I mean? He's been hanging out. Rubbing his food in it. Rubbing his food. He's been praying at the mosque. His elbows what I mean? He's been hanging out. Rubbing his food in it. Rubbing his food. He's been praying at the mosque.
Starting point is 02:17:08 His elbow's all over a dirty ass carpet. And then this guy's dropping salt off of his bow and all of us are getting food poisoning. I don't think it's that. Everybody's like, oh my God, it's so cool that he's dropping his salt. I don't like it. Hey, hey, look, you see this? Look, ready, ready?
Starting point is 02:17:22 And release the crane. I want the three yardyard grinder right here. Get your fucking fingers off my salt. Why are your fingers on my fucking salt? Okay? Take your sunglasses off. There's so many things wrong with this guy. There's so many things wrong with this guy.
Starting point is 02:17:38 Why is he making a fuck ton of money? Why are multiple parts of your body touching the salt before it hits my steak? Right? Like, imagine a random person when you're about to eat. You got a pocket. Y'all want any pepper? It's like it's a game of dice. Y'all want any pepper?
Starting point is 02:17:51 Some lint? What else are you going to put? Just like shots of Lukey on the steak? I didn't even think about that. Bro, it's disgusting. There's no way he has Purell in his back pocket to douse off the fingers real quick. And then if he does, now I got to eat Purell. How about you keep your fucking fingers off of my...
Starting point is 02:18:08 Dude, imagine you sat down with your steak and your waiter came over, put his fat fucking fingers in the salt and then spread it all over your steak. That's weird as fuck. I don't know why it's so normal for him. Dude, I would go crazy. Even if you got like a bowl of chicken wings and like picking them out for you. Like, here's this one, here's that one. I'm like,
Starting point is 02:18:25 Skittles man. I don't want, you want 20%. You hold the wing in front of me. So my fingers don't get dirty. Dude. 20%. Is that crazy?
Starting point is 02:18:35 25%. I'm scared to see you at a multimillionaire. He's scared of me. 20. No, no. 20%. This is how it works.
Starting point is 02:18:42 20%. You're me. You sit right there. And I want you to just place the wing in front of my face like that and then rotate it like- Like rotating the pork that they got on the halal trucks? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's shawarma. But just slowly rotate it so that I can bite everything like that, and then I don't want
Starting point is 02:19:02 to say I'm done. I just want to go like that. I want to- It's like a swipe. I want to swipe right with my head. I just want to go like that I want to it's like a swipe I want to swipe I think he's running for president I think that's the only person you and Kim Jong-un
Starting point is 02:19:10 are the only two people that can do that shit in this world fam tell me that that's not worth 25 you wouldn't tip 25% now your fingers don't smell like Frank's Red Hot
Starting point is 02:19:17 for the next three days that honestly oh yeah you get all the money yeah that's 25% they might even get 28% from me for that. They might even get that extra 30 cents that Schultz got in his last pocket.
Starting point is 02:19:30 Hold on, what is that? Well, first of all, this is, no, this is too funny. How much are wings? 10 bucks, right? I'm like 25%. That's 250. Alex is going, I might even drop 280 on you, too. I might even give my firstborn child after that.
Starting point is 02:19:45 He said 30 more cents. I might even. I might go. If they dip it in ranch for me, I'm giving them everything. But just imagine you could do it like a pitcher that doesn't like the suggestion from the catcher. No, no, no. Just keep it going. And if he got the wing.
Starting point is 02:20:03 He said flats only, you idiot. Exactly. Motherfucker went and brought out the leg, the thigh. Come on, bro. I want them flats. How are you pitching that to the waiter that isn't accustomed to it yet? Hey, bro. Could you hold this real quick?
Starting point is 02:20:14 Hey, bro. Come here real quick. Stand behind me real quick. Yeah, yeah. Put your arms around me real quick. Cool. Yo, your arms and my arms. And he's like, what?
Starting point is 02:20:21 And I'm like, just trust me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Turn up that music in the background. What music in the background here sinatra starts playing yeah perfect son that is the restaurant that we got to open where they feed you the chicken they feed you the chicken tenant not chicken wings they feed you the wings eating it right in front of you swipe to the side if you don't like it. If you're done, swipe to the side. And here's the tricky part. They got to help you get the meat in between the bones in a flat.
Starting point is 02:20:51 That's the hard part. Because that one, that's the more hands-on. And you know what they got to do? They got to use their pointer finger to poke the meat back in your direction. You got another waiter holding and another guy. One more comes in. He's a joust guy. He's a joust guy.
Starting point is 02:21:05 He uses one pointer finger, okay, and he pokes the meat and then you just bite it off like a shrimp. So that's perfect. You got enough listeners. Next time you're at a wingspot, there might be somebody be like, yo, you told me to, and then they just get behind you and you're like, perfect. That's it with a bib. That's it. Like the
Starting point is 02:21:21 broil. Tell me that's not worth 28%, 30%. Minimum. I mean, because look, you do that for 10 tables, you make five bucks a bib. That's it. Like the broil. Tell me that's not worth 28%, 30%. Minimum. I mean, because, look, you do that for 10 tables. You make five bucks a table. I mean, that's not great money, but that's all $50. But that's enough to pay for the fucking L train, all right? You good. 50 bucks, bro.
Starting point is 02:21:41 Think about that. 50 bucks. All you got to do is hold chicken wangs bro we it's better than a heart on my latte i'll tell you that much without a doubt bro sometimes we call asians uh asian chicks chicken wangs right because this old asian chick that we airbnb'd said chicken wang uh we were asking for things to eat and she was like she was like she was like, bro, Korean fried chicken is the best thing ever. Son, everything black people do,
Starting point is 02:22:09 Koreans do it better. It is unbelievable. The fried chicken, breakdancing, all the things that you traditionally know as black. I don't know why black people worry about white cultural appropriation when Koreans are really the ones that are killing y'all. So, the it's true, right?
Starting point is 02:22:26 It's small, though. We're not threatened. You're not threatened. Why are people so small? Yeah, but yeah, it's still. More mighty. Yeah. We'll hit you with a groan and fuck your day.
Starting point is 02:22:38 Yeah, I got too much confidence. So this lady was like, she was suggesting food. She was like, oh, there's some Mexican. There's some blah, blah, blah. And there's also a place that sells chicken wang. So we've been saying chicken wang for the last months about this. We're in LA, downtown LA. And there's this Korean rap group that's going up.
Starting point is 02:22:59 And there's this line of chicks going to see the Korean rap group. And these girls had body there was some real thick and wing there was some thick and wings so many levels of that joke and some thick and tenders out front of the line just geeking just be like like, son! I was like, Alex, feed me one of them chicken wings. Gladly. Jesus Christ. Well, that's what you got to do to get that 25% right there. You heard it here live.
Starting point is 02:23:39 Live, in full effect. Yo, Trev, tell us where we can find you. Anything else? Yeah, man, I'm currently going around the country. I got Boston coming up in December. I'm going to be at the House of Comedy in Phoenix in November, the weekend before Thanksgiving. December 19th to 21st is Boston.
Starting point is 02:23:54 And then January, I'm going to be in Rochester out here. So I might have to swing by Buffalo, catch a Metallica concert while I'm out here. Gang! Yeah. Well, yeah, trevorwallacecomedy.com for tour dates. Check the YouTube. Yeah, the YouTube, Trevor Wallace.
Starting point is 02:24:06 Instagram, Trevor Wallace. All that shit. But yeah, I post videos and I got a podcast called Stiff Socks. Check out that with my boy Blaustein. We got to get Blaustein on here when he comes back. All right, guys. We're going to take a break for a second. Pay these bills.
Starting point is 02:24:19 We got something cool right here. Now, college basketball is back. You know that. And all roads are leading to the final four of the NCAA championship in where? Atlanta, baby. That's right. Follow the conference tournament
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Starting point is 02:26:52 That's forthepeople.com, forward slash flagrant, for a free no-obligation consultation. There's only one. Morgan & Morgan, now let's get back to the show. TikTok. Have you used TikTok? Do you use TikTok? Yeah, so I pretty much just upload a lot of my old stuff on there, like Instagram clips that I already put.
Starting point is 02:27:12 And I fucked around, and now that's one of my biggest platforms. I got a mill on there, and I don't know what the fuck to do with this audience. I don't know if that contributes to ticket sales, because motherfuckers on there are like 12. 12 years old. Yeah, so i think i'm for it because if you i mean a lot of people in this world like you and i got this whole like we got so much shit out there already yep if you could just you know throw some shit out there you're i'm not making content for tiktok per se you're just repurposing which is great
Starting point is 02:27:38 because this is already shot edited stuff that i already approved yeah so and i mean there's such shitty content on there already that if there's something well shot and good comedy. People are in it. Yeah, they're like, what is this genius stuff? Yeah. You know, so I was able to grow on there really quick just posting old shit. Right.
Starting point is 02:27:52 Because it might have been an audience that didn't see my Instagram or YouTube before that. Right. So, I mean, are you on there or what do you think? We're dabbling. It's, I think it is a brilliant platform, man. Like, it solved the one problem with Instagram, and that is people don't watch Instagram with their sound on.
Starting point is 02:28:10 The sound. That's the biggest thing I like about TikTok. You go there to watch videos. But listen, too. Yeah. It's not just watch. You are listening to that shit. And that's the thing that Instagram faces is people are on Instagram
Starting point is 02:28:20 just to see what the fuck their friends are doing, you know, on Saturday at noon. But it's also like, here's a video I care a lot about and they're like, I like it. No subtitles? Well, fucking good luck. I might not have my phones in. Also, Instagram, the feed
Starting point is 02:28:35 is drowned out by pictures. Everything on TikTok is content and that is something that is a huge difference, right? You don't post just a picture with you and your dog, a picture of you and your boys, a picture of you on stage. You don't post that on TikTok. Every piece of TikTok content. Video content.
Starting point is 02:28:51 But it is like with the purpose to entertain. Yes. Not to flex. Yes. I'm entertaining. Now, it's sometimes dumb girls just lip syncing to a song or like some idiot model guy who's like, look at my abs. But he's at least trying or she's at least trying to create content out of it yeah but that was the great thing about vine is using the same thing
Starting point is 02:29:08 you go there oh 100 you go there to watch with the with the intent to enjoy content yes versus instagram is periodically somebody tags you and oh you got to check this out okay i'll watch this video right but like tiktok you're like i'm going to be entertained it's so easy to scroll and spend time and time and time hours We spent hours on it. It is interesting. So how did you build up? You just had some videos go. You had like a strategy with it.
Starting point is 02:29:31 I really kind of just saw what people were already posting on there. And you can do some trend stuff. So you can hop on trends. And it's kind of like at midnight, they'll throw out like there's a trend that'll be going on. And then you put your rendition on it. So I'm making something with my take, which is kind of cool. But you were using old stuff though. Both. So I'm making something with my take, which is kind of cool. But you were using old stuff though. Both.
Starting point is 02:29:46 So I uploaded a bunch of old stuff that got a little bit of traction because people are like, oh, I've seen this guy before. That's so-and-so, whatever. So I built like, you know, a couple, maybe like 50K on that. And then I did a couple trend type things.
Starting point is 02:29:56 And then I just kind of like, what's great about it is there's also not a lot of expectations for like really, really good content on there. So if I throw something up there and it's a bomb, like it's trash swipe right through yeah exactly it's not like on instagram somebody's like i want that minute of my life back nobody they just scroll so right you know you can try shit i'll delete it if it's you know whatever but for the most part i i leaned to the
Starting point is 02:30:17 trends i made some random shit that i wrote down in my notes for a video concept that maybe wasn't flushed out or uh i needed too many people for it but um they don't expect high quality you can play seven different characters in that bitch you could be tyler perry in that motherfucking app and nobody's gonna be like is that the same actor yeah so nobody has expectations and then when you give them the tiktok shit and well-produced shit like they just flock to it you know right yeah so uh it's i think exactly what you said people go on there be entertained, and there's not a high standard. So if you're funny as fuck- You can excel.
Starting point is 02:30:49 Very fast. But certain things work, certain things don't work. It's just fascinating. You've got to catch them quick. And that's the music component, right? Exactly. Our first stimulus is auditory. So if I swipe to something, and then the song that comes on is the catchiest part of that song, I'm going to give it a second.
Starting point is 02:31:06 Yeah. Now I'm invested in the content. I love me a good buildup, but in this day and age, I'm like, bro, if I don't hear a producer tag within three seconds, I don't want it. Yeah. So I think it trains you to kind of just be quick with it. But also, I mean, the weirdest part is people still trying to figure out what to do with that audience because people got millions of fans on there. But it's like now. Now what? I've had people come up to you on the street and be like i love your tiktok and i'm like what the fuck yeah i like it's almost i feel disrespected in a
Starting point is 02:31:33 sense yeah but in a sense it's like that's a whole new platform that saw me that might not have seen me before a whole new demo of people exactly yeah so in a sense you know if i mean i was going to try to do this for like upcoming tours i had but but just use that app somehow to be like, what's up? I'm a stand-up comic. These are the dates I'm going to. And then try to make it fit that demo somehow, which I don't know how the fuck I'd do that. Just put Kidz Bop in the background or some shit. Just see if that helps with tickets.
Starting point is 02:32:02 I kind of want to put out, before I announce on any other social media, be like, I'm going to be in New Haven tonight. And how many tickets sell just based off TikTok? That's smart. Just to see if I get 13 sales off just posting on there, does it help? Yeah. Because it's got two features.
Starting point is 02:32:21 You post your video and then you can go live, which I don't know what that does. So maybe you go live and be like, what's up guys, I want to announce my tour date. It's got two features. You post your video and then you can go live, which I don't know what that does. Yeah. So maybe you go live and be like, what's up guys? I want to announce my tour date. So it's 18 and up. You know, I just want to see if that has an influence. Because now I've got this audience and I just don't know what to do with it. Right.
Starting point is 02:32:33 So it's great that I can just dish my content on there. But like, where's the utilization on it? I think that it's a long play. Yeah. I remember when I first started getting into chris rock i was probably 12 years old 11 years old i don't know i was pretty young dude and uh but he groomed me into like what type of stand-up i like and then the type of stand-up i turned into being yeah in a lot of ways right so i think that you look at that tick to TikTok audience not in terms of selling tickets, but in terms of this is the next generation of fans that are going to grow into me.
Starting point is 02:33:11 Yeah, 100%. So it's acquisition, and it's like setting a standard of your type of comedy and your content. And then when they're old enough or they go to school, then they go, oh, my God, I'm on the board for the school events. Yeah, that's how all my colleges came through this year those are the people like yo you know like because they loved you in high school they finally go to college they get a little flex it's just it's awareness at this point right that's what happened with guy code with me right and it was like okay i see how that's going i think my demo has gotten a little bit older now though youtube changes things like you can like broaden it a
Starting point is 02:33:42 weird way like old and young but but yeah i think there's something there to it one concern is someone told me that the chinese government i saw something about that and two things about that that they're using it as a profiling strategy for the parents not the kids huh so like when kids will post like super liberal stuff they're like okay those are democratic parents when the kids will post like super liberal stuff they'll be like okay those are democratic parents when the kids will post like super trump stuff they'll be like oh those are the republican parents i mean and then they use that data to like target them and you know push ads to like those regions etc i mean we're already all exposed like the motherfuckers that put the little dot over their laptop screen i'm like you're not doing shit bro you thought you think you're stopping cia i mean all of our shit's already out there so at this point i mean i heard that too yeah which is insane to me but like out of all the
Starting point is 02:34:28 apps you're gonna use you know i mean that's what facebook was right right facebook was this thing came up social network the whole world got on it and then all of a sudden the whole world was in some way controlled by one guy in california yeah i mean the biggest thing about any social media platform comedy is comedy funny is funny it's just finding out how to apply it to uh like certain shit will pop off on twitter for me that won't pop up on facebook right twitter is more current and then had i posted that video on facebook three weeks later when they're catching wave about it then it hits so you just alter all your shit you know like for every video i post i make sure it starts on my face because i know that people are going to be like wait is that the you know as much as i love is a cinematic shot of the fucking the sun rising with a slow, nobody's got time for that.
Starting point is 02:35:08 So like, there's like little things that like, I don't make content for TikTok, but I might edit something in a specific way. I might be like, okay, I already got this video. Let me chop up the quick shit up front. Yeah. Get the first few beats out and then it can, you know, drag on just because people scroll like this, bro. Just watch a random person scroll.
Starting point is 02:35:25 It's so quick. If you don't catch them like that, you've got to get them quick. Whereas YouTube, it's, okay, I'm going to hang out for a second. But you're great at that. You put that meat of whatever the fuck, dumbest audience member ever. You put that meat part, then the title, then you're in. Instead of
Starting point is 02:35:41 being like, wait until four minutes in. You won't believe it, bro. I'm saying a fucking BuzzFeed article, all right? You won't believe what happens next. You give them that teaser, but you get it. You understand the internet. And so many people will be like, have you seen this guy? You know this guy. So you're ahead of that.
Starting point is 02:35:54 So you get the internet. And if there's a platform out there that everybody's going to, I mean, try some shit. Were you posting stand-up clips on TikTok? We posted a few. Another thing I was concerned about is someone told me that in the user agreement TikTok owns everything
Starting point is 02:36:08 that you give them. Like the IP or something like that. So I'm a little concerned about putting stand-up there because what if I want to use that stand-up in a special or something like that randomly and they're like, eh, eh, eh. Really? That's what someone told me so I don't know. And I doubt that they're going to go out and do like
Starting point is 02:36:23 cease and desist shit. Could you imagine that some 15-year-old would be like, Mr. Schultz, what have you read here? God, that's fucking nuts. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, we all fly through the terms and conditioning. They could literally own all of my future children. I've never read the terms and conditions. No.
Starting point is 02:36:39 Or a contract in general. Just sign here. Oh, contracts. I'd rather get fucked over by a contract than read a contract. 100%. Quarter mil or five minutes of my time? Well, you already know. Real talk.
Starting point is 02:36:52 I get why people get screwed out of everything. Yes, and they use big ass words and all this shit. Going through this legalese, bro. And sometimes they break the page up in half like a Bible and you're just like, yeah, yeah, yeah. And the font just makes me want to go to prison. It's not good. It's just, fuck, yeah it's bad it is bad but hey man i love what you're doing bro i wish you were in new york um i really do wish you were in new york man i wish you were i start coming out here a lot more though you should man yeah i mean i i guess i hope you know i'm sure
Starting point is 02:37:20 you're going to be getting a lot of opportunities and deals and these things in the near future and I hope that you I hope that you keep doing what you're doing you can do them alongside grab the money yeah but do not transfer your shit you don't want to answer a certain reason that's your power that's your leverage don't bring that over to anywhere right you know Spotify asked for it Sirius XM asked for it comedy so don't bring i continue doing this shit and i'll do that stuff with you because i think in the next like maybe five years but even less when the business organizes itself a little bit more when everybody's fully streaming then you make that purchase or actually you get purchased right you know what i mean like you have 10 15 million people and you say, hey, the only place I can be seen now is on Disney Plus.
Starting point is 02:38:10 Subscribe. And then you charge Disney Plus $250 million for everything that you do. Yeah. Instead of charging Comedy Central a million. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like as long as you can eat, as long as everything's good,
Starting point is 02:38:23 now's the time to own everything. Yeah, and also, like, the people follow you for a certain reason, so build up that audience and don't, like, jump ship and be like, well, peace, I'm going in fucking sequel movies. People get so excited, like, you know, at the idea, because, you know, you're a little bit younger. How old are you? 26. So you're 26, so, like, you're at the end of the generation that actually had traditional
Starting point is 02:38:42 media. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, I'm maybe at the end of the generation that didn't traditional media. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, I'm maybe at the end of the generation that didn't. I'm 36. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right? So, like, I got social media in college. So I was like, huh, you grew up with social media, right?
Starting point is 02:38:55 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I should have been around. So it's like I think what's happening now is you see this complete transition in media, but we still go. You see this complete transition in media, but we still go. I see guys in my generation all the time. They validate themselves with these antiquated methods. They're like, I need to do late night. Do you?
Starting point is 02:39:13 I need to have a sitcom. Do you? Yeah. Your videos, my videos, get more views than any sitcom on TV now. It's nuts. So why the fuck would I sacrifice? And it directs the consumer. Yeah, and you have all that connectivity and everything. It's on my channel. That's it. You own it. It's yours. So why the fuck would I sacrifice Yeah. Yeah. And like you have all that connectivity
Starting point is 02:39:26 and everything. It's on my channel. That's it. You own it. It's yours. Your video has a million views. They're like, where do I go for this?
Starting point is 02:39:30 Not wait till it credits. Who is that guy that played this actor? Oh, it's Andrew Stoltz. This is literally like, this video has this many views. Here's subscribe. Now I'm part of this guy's world.
Starting point is 02:39:38 It's like, it's chronic crazy. So just keep that. It's a threat to, you know, all that stuff. And I'm sure they're asking you, right?
Starting point is 02:39:43 Yeah. And so it's just like, don't, don't give that up. No, no, no, no. It's just not worth it. And I'm sure they're asking you, right? Yeah. So it's just like, don't give that up. No, no, no, no. It's just not worth it. And I see guys give it up. Yeah.
Starting point is 02:39:49 I mean, if I get something, I'll hit you up. I'll be like, yo, is this worth the bet? No. It's not. Not for five years. Because I promise you, and this is the way I see media, and this is why I want us all to really connect, is if you were in New York, I would be trying my hardest to have all of us partner up
Starting point is 02:40:08 into this thing and maybe we can do a cross coast but it's different you know we have we have some things cooking we can't exactly talk about yet but we'll get there but like but i would want us all to concrete you like to create this like conglomerate because there's so much media influence that can happen like i've seen the LA YouTuber guys. They did it. They all kind of know each other, hang out with each other, cross-pollinate and build each other up. It's really amazing the influence they have.
Starting point is 02:40:32 We were just talking about the KSI Logan Paul thing. They had a major boxing match, two guys that don't even really box, but they don't box, at the Staples Center. Most heavyweight boxers cannot fill out the Staples Center. The Staples Center is insane. That was even an option. What do you want to do this fight at? I'd be like, I don't know, a park or some shit?
Starting point is 02:40:50 Where Kimbo Slice do it. Yeah, right, exactly. The backyard in Florida, let's do it. But the Staples Center. The Staples Center. So that's the power of new media, right? And as long as we harness that and we own everything, we are the new version of newspapers yeah you know like when
Starting point is 02:41:08 hamilton was tweeting about it like it was a heavyweight ufc fight son they had real ksi son they had real boxers boxing on undercard yeah like it was a full saunders they literally they made their own ufc event and that's based off internet influence. Fuck. So that's it. So it's like, this is the way media operates now. This is the way we've got to control it. And then what's going to happen is once the streaming wars end, you're going to have these different companies, you know, Netflix, Disney, all these types of places, HBO, The Warner, all that kind of stuff.
Starting point is 02:41:38 They're all going to be settled. We're going to know who their audiences are. And then we're going to go, hey hey now that all TV has shifted into streaming there's no real you know issue here everybody's just watching streaming stuff we have our different platforms Apple Plus etc then you get the Howard Stern deal yeah then you get the 500 million then you get the 250 million then you and you're actually in a place where people can watch you go to Comedy Central now, nobody's watching it. But if you go to Apple Plus, everybody already got
Starting point is 02:42:08 Apple Plus. Yeah. You see what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We just gotta wait to see where all the streams end up. Yeah. So it's like, and even doing, like I told my agents, I was like, we're not doing any shows now. We're not doing anything scripted. We'll do a little one-offs on them. I'll do a movie if they give it to me. Yeah. But like
Starting point is 02:42:23 creating something in this environment is worthless because nothing can succeed. Everybody's too fractured. Everybody's in a million different places. Eventually we're going to be, dude, eventually there's going to be one service that packages all the streaming services and we're back at cable. Yeah. Right? Oh, it's going to come full loop for sure. And then once it's full loop, the people with the most personal influence and biggest followings have all the leverage.
Starting point is 02:42:49 Yeah. We make them bid on us. They're not being like, who's got the best jawline? They're like, this motherfucker got 10 mil. The jawline? You know what I'm saying? Who be mocking the Zoomies employees the best? Yeah, you're right.
Starting point is 02:42:59 Whatever we need, boom, right there. So it's like the holdout for that. Take the money on the side. Just don't leave. Yeah. Don't leave any of that right because the real money it really is everybody every streaming platform is just sitting there with guns at each other like who and but you i mean i mean even netflix like when they first started they didn't know they'd be as big as they are i mean they probably had intentions but nobody knows like who's gonna be the next big thing you know what is netflix was the restaurant you know when they're like small towns that have one restaurant?
Starting point is 02:43:27 Yeah. And it's like the food ain't amazing, but it's packed because that's the only fucking restaurant. Yeah. So if you want to eat out, you got to eat there. Right. Now, a few more restaurants done moved in the neighborhood. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right?
Starting point is 02:43:40 So now the level of food got to step up. And I think the next few years are going to decide what that looks like. And we just keep stacking. Keep doing what we're doing. Yeah. Because it's not like we're in a spot where, yeah. We're making money. Everything's good.
Starting point is 02:43:53 You know, you're good. Yeah. Right. You don't need food. You know what I think? Like life is fine. Yeah. And then once all those things are settled and they need the content creators with actual
Starting point is 02:44:04 influence, because we will become the next quote-unquote movie stars. Yeah, I mean... The only reason movie stars get paid money is because they can get people to go watch the movie. Well, we'll be the only people that can get people to go to things. Yeah. There'll be radio DJs because everybody loves them. They wake up every morning.
Starting point is 02:44:20 Or podcast guys, et cetera. And then there'll be the YouTube creators. Yeah. Shit. Three to five years. i'd say so yeah i mean it's it's a weird world but when it's going to settle out in a little yeah like you said three to five years and then it'll be like very clear and then i'll be like oh i should have seen that coming or like yep i predicted that shit and then we can sell the script and shit because now people will know where the fuck to go for content and it's not obscene to be like download these seven apps and find me here and then it's only yeah exactly even
Starting point is 02:44:49 apple tv got all these shows out with the fucking aquaman and it's like ah but do i want to go there like amazon amazon prime like but i go to amazon to buy shit to get the towels eventually it's going to be in one thing and you just just type the name of it. And you go, oh, yeah, that's easy. That's where we. Yeah, yeah. Now we just build. Now we're farming. Exactly.
Starting point is 02:45:10 We're just sowing the seeds. Exactly. Each platform is like a different city. It's like, OK, I got TikTok. I got people in D.C. Instagram. I got people in fucking Arizona. It's just like you're just building up that repertoire.
Starting point is 02:45:19 Yeah. And you're killing it. And you got the youth that's going to grow into it. So it's like you are going to teach them what type of comedy they like. You you're gonna teach them what type of comedy they like you're gonna teach them what type of comedy they're into you know and i think that's why it's so important because you have stand-up chops i mean you opened for me i thought you were fucking great thanks when we were in oxnard it was great and um i think it's important that you start setting a tone especially with like the younger folks like this is what stand-up looks like this is what stand-up looks like this is what my youtube content looks like this is what my twitter stuff looks like this is what stand-up is
Starting point is 02:45:49 for me and then you create that expectation for the show and then they're like oh hell yeah i saw those bits and this is what i'm coming for right it does that way they come out to the show knowing what to expect instead of waiting for you to go you know say something about white claw or say something yeah yeah yeah I got you and it's I'm telling you something has happened with me
Starting point is 02:46:08 it's like I put out a lot of crowd work so they created this expectational crowd work before the crowd work I was just being like flagrant with the jokes so they came out
Starting point is 02:46:14 for the flagrancy do you have to say anything to be like listen don't yell shit out but if you do you might make it on the channel or are people smart enough
Starting point is 02:46:22 to be like we get it I see people like wearing shit sometimes to like they look to be like I think they're just trying to make it on the channel. Or are people smart enough to be like, we get it. I see people like wearing shit sometimes to like, they look to be like, I think they're just trying to make it into a video. And I'll avoid them usually.
Starting point is 02:46:31 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, there was this albino guy in the front row. I had to fucking talk to him, but like, he's not wearing that. You know what I mean? He just,
Starting point is 02:46:37 you know what I mean? He didn't leave the house that day. It happens to be a fucking albino, right? Like, that was nuts. Black Nigerian albino front row it was insane right you get on stage and be like all right dog i didn't even notice him at first
Starting point is 02:46:50 because he looked like a regular white guy yeah but that's something obviously we got to put out but it's something i've been i've been cognizant of which is like you know it's constantly reminding like the flagrancy is what we're doing this is what we're fighting back against this is the type of comedy that's so rare out there in the world that's the type of comedy i love to do and that's what you're going to see when you come out to the tour and then there's going to be these moments obviously that might happen etc and i think you you have to curate that for the stand-up part yeah i feel that for sure because you body all these videos yeah but at the end of the day you're a stand stand-up. Yeah, exactly. Before all of it.
Starting point is 02:47:25 Yeah, yeah, yeah. So like all these- Start with that. Exactly. So all these people gotta know. Right. Even if the team's giving it away. And have some value
Starting point is 02:47:31 because maybe somebody watching my stand-up, because my stand-up is very different from the videos. They're gonna be like, you know, I like his videos, but the stand-up that tastes is like, it's a little bit edgier.
Starting point is 02:47:37 It's not our type. But they know that before going to a show. Now the people at the shows are the people that are like, we saw this clip, this is what we want, do that type stuff.
Starting point is 02:47:44 100%. I think early 2020, I'm gonna shoot something, what you did, and just dice it up. Yes. Do that. And then I don't know if it's weekly or biweekly or whatever, put out a stand-up clip. But definitely get the awareness out there. And if you need any help, we'll help you, man. Yeah.
Starting point is 02:47:56 More than happy to help you guys. 100%. But yeah, dude, it will be, I think you'll find it. I think you'll find it's just going to be next level. Yeah. That's definitely the plan I mean I got bits we even talked about this earlier
Starting point is 02:48:07 it's like you still doing you're like I need to and your bits actually are similar in terms of the way you punch shit
Starting point is 02:48:13 yeah yeah because like I think what really works when you're mocking is that you're like understated about your lines you're not going here is the line
Starting point is 02:48:20 it's almost sometimes throw away you pick what you want it's not like heavy emphasis on it you know yeah so it seems really authentic and like even though you're making fun of a character and i think that you act that way in your stand-up as well like with your lines exactly so i think they will find connectivity yeah if you show it to them yeah i mean yeah i'm starting to find that
Starting point is 02:48:40 too where people are picking out lines from that or even like you just say something you get a laugh and you're like i wasn't okay yeah i guess that's funny you know i'm just talking the way i would talk you know yeah so yeah but that's good shit man i'm so proud of you man it's awesome to see what you're doing thank you just fucking murdering it go check them out everybody again it's uh give them your socials uh just trevor wallace on instagram and fuck me on tiktok trevor wallace uh youtube youtube youtube yeah youtube uh i got a bunch of stuff on there i mean i got some of the videos out there Just type in Trevor Wallace
Starting point is 02:49:07 And then for tickets For any tour It's TrevorWallaceComedy.com Yeah Alright guys Thanks so much for coming on Peace

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