Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - MISS MURDER AMERICA - Flagrant 2 Patreon

Episode Date: April 19, 2019

This week on Patreon, Andrew, Akaash, and Kaz discuss: Dame vs Russ, AW & BW, being able to cheat if you're famous, sloppy head, Melo not having a home, sexy killers, and much more. INDULGE!!! Catch the full episode! www.Patreon.com/Flagrant2

Yo we should start doing Time BW Before Weinstein And AW after Weinstein That's how all relationships Be measured right now Me and my girl Got together

One BW We got together In 2014 BW BW and AW Time starts over Jesus Christ Andrew were you ever Embarrassed 2014 B-Dub. B-Dub and A-Dub, bro. Nah, time starts over. Jesus Christ.

Andrew, were you ever embarrassed with any girl that you brought home? A lot of them. A lot of them. That's why we were getting extra drinks until 5 in the morning. I didn't even want to introduce them to my mom when she was drunk. God. Oh my God. Yo, but would you proudly bring home like a baddie and let your mom look at him oh hell yeah hell yeah because you gotta let your mom know what you're doing every mom wants their kid to be a hoe like they act like they don't like their son

mom every mom wants their son because like mom's low-key brag about it like moms will be like moms when the other like parent friends are around Like moms will be like Moms when the other Like parent friends are around And they'll be like So is Andrew dating? And then he'll be like Oh is it? This guy's just

Bringing home everything This guy's Wow These women Parents will never Straight up call you a hoe They'll have like Little cute names for it

That my son Oh my son's such a heartbreaker Heartbreaker Yeah yeah yeah That's just But yo that's why we fuck boys cause our moms want it

like if you're not getting no pussy it's disappointing to your mom real talk it is disappointing I'm not gonna hold you like if I had a child

and like he wasn't getting no pussy I'd be like damn like I'd be trying to help him like you don't wanna take my car

you don't wanna spray his cologne I used to take the Toyota Sienna I remember I fucked some German his cologne I used to take The Toyota Sienna I remember I fucked Some German chick By the west side highway On a Toyota Sienna

My mom used to Drive a Benz Minivan fuck Is probably alright Nah minivan shit Was alright Parked illegally Shit

You got like You got mad room You gotta park illegally So you can be quick And it's not your fault Facts You know what I mean Like

You just You just be like Alright let's get out of here because the parking i could come in come on let me bust this out real quick like i got control i'm 23 years old it's like come on now we out you see there's pros and cons to fucking in the car though because like that it makes the exit i'm not gonna lie way less awkward like jack from titanic made fucking in a car cool because he did that shit so now it's romantic it's like if you love titanic you can't make an argument to fucking the car is back to the future almost ruined it for everybody what happened back in the future that girl almost at michael j fox's mom almost gets raped in the back of the car they don't say they don't say

it's right but by by aw standards after Weinstein. That's an AW rape. That ain't a BW rape. That ain't B-dubs, right? That's just kicking game. You know what I mean? Back in 1988, BW. That was just flirting. That's a BW rape. That's how you know it's rape. A B-dub rape?

Oh, that's just... A B-dub rape is rape rape. AW rape is like... AW rape, we need to know the context. We need to know the context, but B-Dub rape is rape rape. A-W rape is like, A-W rape, we need to know the context. We need to know the context, but B-Dub rape? Gotta hear both sides,

like Jesus says. Gotta hear both sides. Yeah, A-W rapes, we gotta hear both sides, but B-W rape? He did that shit. If you get convicted of rape, B-W.

Oh, come on. Anything like 2001 B-W, it's like, oh no, that's rape. B-W rape, you got gravel scars. B-W rape., oh, no. BW Ray, you got gravel scars. BW Ray. BW Ray.

Clothing is ripped and shit. You know what I mean? There's fucking tracks in the lawn. There's back. There's like scratches on the back. There's like fucking the nails are gone because they're dragging from the floor and shit. Oh, God, no. Please, God.

People are yelling people just like ignoring you getting dragged down into the into a forest or some shit oh fuck bro bw rape was something serious yeah aw rape is like that's different it's just different it's a different variety it's a variety rape it is it's like you know what it is louis ck was aw rape like yeah that's the thing it's like you ever have like. He's off on himself. Ready, Bacardi. You ever have like Bacardi rum? Just regular rum?

Yes. And then there's like 151. Yes. Like 151 is AW rape. You take a shot at it, you're like. Oh, shit. That's a VW rape. That's BW.

Sorry, that's BW rape. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bacardi 151 is BW. You feel that on the way in. That's a pistol. Sorry, that's BW rape. Yeah, yeah, yeah. McCartney was in 121 at BW. You feel that on the way in. That's abyssal. Oh, God. But regular McCartney, you just feel that the next day. You're like, damn, I shouldn't have done that.

I should have been raped. A little regret the next day. Oh, my God. Oh, man. We the gold story. You know how you fuck others? Oh my god! Oh man! We the gold star! Ain't nobody fucking with us! Ain't nobody fucking with us! That is a hilarious way

That's a hilarious way to look at it and the difference is you feel it on the way in and now it's just you feel regretful the next day Just a little rape hangover Just a little You're the next day You're like I shouldn't have done that

Left a bad taste in my mouth It takes a while For it to kick in Like Did I have How many shots did I have I was mixing What

The fuck Oh man Fuck man That was some bars Y'all got for the Patreon Oh man Holy Holy shnikes good stuff anyway don't rape yeah don't rape nobody i'll be out here raping y'all that shit is whack bwaw don't matter it don't matter any w but the the best pussy is giving pussy not taking pussy to

now paid for there you go i can't rape if you pay yo real talk if you single today just get hookers you should be looking at it as the best oh if you got money if you paid rape if you pay Yo real talk If you single today Just hook her She should be looking at it Oh if you got money If you paid Yeah If you paid That's the one good thing about being

Even if you don't save up Like all the money You would waste on hoes at bars Yeah You put that toward A little prostitute piggy bank You know what I mean Prostitute piggy bank

Prostitute piggy A prostitute piggy bank Is so funny Yeah I mean Just put it in your Capital one savings account A prostitute piggy. A prostitute piggy bank is so funny. Yeah, I mean, just put it in your Capital One Savings account. You bet you allocate funds. That's your pussy piggy bank. It's interest.

You know, you want to know some crazy shit? I was in Germany, right? And I went to one of these whore houses because I just wanted to experience it as a white man does. Right. You know how we love these. You do love experiences. White people love experiences. What are these folks doing? A culture.

So I'm walking around experiencing, surveying the goods, and I'm asking how much it was. And it was very cheap for like, you know, blowjobs. And we're talking about like $20, $40, 40 euros, whatever like that. Right. So incredibly cheap. does we're talking about like 20 40 dollars yeah 40 euros whatever like that right so incredibly cheap and i think in a weird way and hear me out i think by legalizing prostitution it makes men value a woman's company outside of sex more i don't need to hear you out that makes perfect sense right absolutely perfect sense you guys get it you guys get it but i'm saying maybe somebody

who's listening even a girl right now who's listening right who might object and i guess what i'm trying to say is once we've commodified the sex thing which in our heads is already commodified we know it's just get it out the system right and if i know 20 30 40 hours i just get an amazing blow job and then just get that out the way now the girl that i'm looking to spend time with do you respect more i'm not doing it for the more? I'm not doing it for the blowjob. I'm not doing it for the sex. A lot of times we'll sacrifice personality and we'll like deal with shit that isn't that good so that we can get the sex.

But when we have easy access to that sex for a very reasonable price, I'm only choosing to spend time with a girl because I love her personality or I'm really into it. So prostitution helps women get better relationships for sure 100 they should be the most supportive of it definitely one way to look at it you know like especially like a lot of people that have control over their sexual urges and know yeah so like you know differentiate okay this is a hoe

you know i mean she's here to do a job yes and even if at the very at the smallest level yes if you look at it as like an occupation right like most people don't love what they do honestly if you got a man and it's a job it's a job if you got a man and he fucks a prostitute he loves your company yeah that's what that's all i'm saying he's just there for you even if he cheats yes he with you because he loves you you're not just an object to him you're just not a pussy you're way less you're Because he loves you. You're not just an object to him. You're just not a pussy. You're way less. You're way less. He actually found the object.

Yeah. That thing is the object. Yeah. You are the personality, the soul, the person he's with. The three-dimensional thing that he loves.

Yo, real talk, if your man fucks a prostitute, he loves you. But if you're thinking in AW terms, though, like, even the prostitutes are people, too.

Children. You're wiling right now. You're wiling right now. in AW terms though like even the prostitutes are people too children you're wiling right now you're wiling right now yo these buckets aren't people dude are you kidding me holy shit this is before

prostitutes are people this is BPAP over here this is BPAP bro fuck out of here yo you made that acronym mad quick I was calculating

before I said it holy shit that was quick bro BPAP that was amazing was amazing yeah nah the um but shout out to prostitutes man they do the job bro y'all really doing it and you made a good point which is like we feel bad for prostitutes like can you imagine doing that all day and it's like yeah i can imagine fucking all day i can do that i cannot cannot imagine working in a fucking steel mill all day or working at a- Building bridges, repairing bridges.

Repairing bridges all day. Washing windows in a skyscraper and shit like that. Or being a therapist and listening to some fucking white chick's problems all day. That is harmful. It's like, do you want to do that or Do you want to suck 12 to 18 dicks a day Oh And make Way more money

Tax free Also eat what you hunt Right So like If you get really good At your job This is quick work For sure

Flagrant media Needs a prostitution division I think I think we're going to do this We need to do this This is a good idea Because think about this Right

You're getting paid for the nut Most times Right So You basically suck As much as You're good at sucking dick Yeah You basically suck as much as you're good at sucking dick. Yeah. You suck as much dick as you are good at sucking dick, right?

It's capitalism, right? So check this out. Let's say you can find a way to make a dude nut within 10 sucks. Yeah. Okay. Wow. No, some girls are amazing. You can find a way to make a dude nut within 10 sucks, right?

And let's say you're shitty and it takes you 100 sucks. That girl could suck 10 dicks with the same amount of sucks it'd take you to suck one. Is she a bigger whore? She's actually sucking less dick, technically. She sucked 10 times the amount, but for 10 times less time. So who is sucking more dick? It's actually the equal amount Of dick sucks You measure by

Not amount of sucks you measure by amount of dicks Right but I think we should flip that And we should measure by amount of sucks So like is a guy's body count Going to be the same like if I have sex with my girl Every day am I Killing it harder than a guy who has sex with a different girl Five times a week Well that's different because that than a guy who has sex with a different girl five times a week?

Well, that's different because that's acquisition of pussy and that's a different thing. Okay, okay. But fucking valid point and I lost you as soon as you said acquisitional. It was over my head.

I'm back onto your head, ready? I'm back with you right here, ready? How good you are in bed is definitely not defined by how many girls you fuck. It's about the amount of time you've put in. Like, there are girls

that we've all been with. Well, maybe've put in like there are girls that we've all been with um well maybe not you yeah but there's girls that we've all been with i wouldn't mean that as a jab but like they're like they had maybe one or two boyfriends but like schooled them in the game of fucking and they're nice in bed and then there's these girls that are hoes we can't fuck at all they're trash experience it's like sports it's like dude you could be about coaching it's about It's about great coaches It's about experiences I know people

You want to be Raymond Bell And Dirk Nowitzki One team Who put in hours of time In the court Hours of time in the court Right But if the level of competition

You're playing with Is making you better You're only going to get so good But if you're fucking Steph Curry And your dad's Del Curry And you get all the Fucking great training And you can fucking Shoot around with pros And be a ball boy For the Horn, if you're fucking Steph Curry and your dad's Del Curry and you get all the fucking great training

and you can fucking shoot around with pros and be a ball boy for the Hornets and you're around the NBA environment your whole life, of course you're gonna

have a better shot at being a pro player and being the greatest shooter ever and all this other shit. Same for sucking dick. If you're around somebody who has

taught you the finer details of how to suck a good dick, just like Steph Curry was around, the finer details of how to shoot a basketball, some become like Steph Curry was around, the finer details of how to shoot a basketball, some become all-time greats,

others just become really okay. You are fucking onto something here, and let me confirm it. I was hanging out with Weezy last night. She came out to my show. Weezy. And a couple of her friends. And she made a good point about sucking dick afterwards.

She was like, I've learned everything about sucking dick from my ho friends and my gay friends. If your girl does not have any ho friends or gay friends, guaranteed she can't suck no dick. The gay dudes know how to do it. And there's no

holds barred with them. The ho girls know how to do shit too and they put that game on. Now if your girl only has like little preppy prissy friends, guaranteed all of them are trash. She's like, the pretty bitches that think that all you got to do is be pretty to get through the door?

They right. No. I mean, you get to get through the door. You still got to get through the door. You also got to get out. It depends how much coaching I want to do. Depends how much coaching I want to do. Son, this is what we need to figure out

And we need to ask the women that are listening to the podcast Because I sincerely want to know from you I want to know if you want us To be dead serious honest About Your abilities sexually And should we school you In the things that we want

Because a lot of girls will say they want it But then when we start telling them That they're not as good as head they might be or the things that they need to do they get really affected personally but what i say is why don't you let us tell you what will make us happy so that that's out of the way i think the easy one is this is what i like yes but sometimes it's like you say that and they don't really. Can I keep it real? Please. It's because I don't want that honesty.

Yeah, me neither, man. I don't want that honesty, bro. Like, when you're a woman, so I was being brutally honest with you. Yeah, yeah. That shit is, you got to have some nuts to take some of that shit, especially when it comes to sex. Because, like, okay, right? Sometimes I'd be wanting to ask a girl if she came but i'd

be like i don't want to know if you did it but you know here's the thing if you're fucking a girl if you're fucking a girl good yeah you know when she came yeah you know like you know when you give her the good one yeah yeah but i like confirmation do you really want to know do you really want to know how it compares to like your past experiences the ain't Catholic school, so I don't want the honest system. I want that real motherfucking talk. I want this shit. I want confirmed. Confirmed kill.

Just look at me and go, confirmed kill. Mission accomplished. That's it. You remember? You know when you play one of them video games, you got to do this many things on a board? That's me. I need that. Check them shits out.

We got it? All right, we got it. All right, we good. Moving on. For sure. And you got to tell your girl that that i'll tell my girl that yeah let me know like and she does like she lets me know i see it and she says it and i'm like yes all right we're good so how do i word this how do i word i want you to put your finger in my ass wow and we got that clip?

We got that clip. Typing it out. Give me that 151. Yo, what's up? This is Akash. That was a preview of our Patreon episode. If you want the full thing, go to www.patreon.com

slash flagrant2. Join the illest community on earth unless you're a social justice warrior. Then you're just going to ruin the fun.