Andrew Schulz's Flagrant with Akaash Singh - Tyson Fury Vs Francis Ngannou, Kai Cenat Goes To Prison, & Hasan Minhaj Fights Back

Episode Date: November 1, 2023

Yerrrrrr it's ANDREW'S 40th BIRTHDAY and we had to get a boys ep out to reflect on that and talk about some hot topics like Hasan Minhaj, last week's big boxing match, Kai Cenat, Andrew's birthday din...ner and much much more. Happy Halloween, Happy Birthday and INDULGE. 0:00 Intro 0:36 Vala bombing HARD 1:23 Happy Birthday Andrew you old fart 3:41 Hangovers are light work 4:13 Matthew Perry conspiracy theories 9:07 Skinny Akaash not having fun 15:21 Andrew's paparazzi dinner exit 19:17 Reflecting on being 40 + 39 felt harder 30:07 Ice Spice in the Halloween Costume 32:02 FREE Hasan Minhaj 42:30 Hypotheticals + teaching BJ + faking nuts + All Due Respect 52:07 Dov needs a wife 53:56 Being afraid of Black & Dagestani D 1:00:43 Congress woman got got + Charla hosting Daily Show 1:04:10 Why is Andrew playing dress-up? 1:06:36 Ngannou v Fury - Francis’ IQ is insane 1:22:24 Akaash is coming through with the picks 1:23:27 Kisha Chavis’ legendary OnlyFans promo 1:25:32 Kai Cenat’s is leading livestreaming content 1:28:46 DeSantis lifts + Maher’s & Dutch politics 1:36:46 Amouranth’s pum pum beer + Yogurt pipeline + Mark’s mum love milkfat 1:42:11 Andrew’s mum’s heavies are AMERICAN 1:42:51 Free Dwight Howard + Ma$e is FUNNY 1:44:53 Burning Man Dwight + swapping spliffs with Superman

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Okay, Al, would you rather 50 black guys or 75 Asian dudes have been with a girl? You have to choose between two of them. It's easy. What is it? They're Asian. Okay, now we have to adjust the numbers. This is where it gets really fun. 25 black guys.
Starting point is 00:00:15 Whatever the other thing is. Change it up even more. Seven black guys. How about which blacks were buried? Francis Ngannou. Son, a thousand anything. Alright. One Francis Ngannou, 50 Asian dudes.
Starting point is 00:00:31 50 Asian dudes. Hey guys, before we started recording, we were all trying to make fun of Alex's burlap outfit. And Schultz's videographer, Vala, had an absolutely legendary bomb. And this is where our episode begins. Do it one more time. Do it one more time.
Starting point is 00:00:50 You want to know what I said? It's like, if you brought one more sack, we could have done a sack race. But don't, don't have that. But he did act out with it too. That's what, that's what he did. Do the act out. Okay, we're going to start from the beginning. Oh, that's an interesting outfit. Al, what are we going to say about that? That's what you need. That's what you need. Two to act out. OK, we're going to start from the beginning. Oh, that's an interesting outfit.
Starting point is 00:01:07 Al, what are we going to say about that? That's crazy. If you brought one more sack, we could have done a sack race. How is that not funny? How is that not funny? It turned out to be the most funny. What's up, everybody? Welcome to Flagrant.
Starting point is 00:01:25 Your boy celebrated his 40th birthday yesterday. It's Uncle Schultz now. Oh, man. And I got to say thank you so much to all of you guys, my wife, Tanya, for organizing an absolutely awesome birthday. That was incredible, man. I really mean it. Thank you, guys. For real, that was so much fun. I really mean it. Thank you guys. For real,
Starting point is 00:01:51 that was so much fun. I think that I'll be gay for a moment. I think that sometimes, yeah, to some extent. But I think sometimes birthdays can be tough because it creates the opportunity for disappointment. When people aren't there for you for a dinner or something in regular life, you're like, oh yeah, everybody's got things to do. They're busy. They got friends. They got family. But then on your birthday, if they don't show up, and again, this is stupid because people are busy, but you can convince yourself.
Starting point is 00:02:14 There's that little devil. It's like, oh, I guess I wasn't important to them or something like that. And- You feel taken for granted. You feel whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's like not even taken for, it's just like, i wish that you know our relationship was was stronger or something like that and um and it was just i mean yeah that's the surprise party was so cool and then like the after party was so cool and like
Starting point is 00:02:35 i never want to put forced pressure on anybody i never want people to think like oh you gotta be there for me you have to be nice to me. I like earning my attention, if you will. That's what we do on stage. I just felt so filled up with love and it was awesome. I just really am grateful for you guys, man. That was a great way to spend my birthday. It was really cool. I love you, man.
Starting point is 00:02:58 I love you, too. After we're here, then you do force that whatever fucking stick shit that is. Oh, dude, the mendoir. You were filling him up. That was awesome. You got a good hit on that. Bro, that shit sent me home.
Starting point is 00:03:12 That shit sent me home. I felt like shit after that one. Tanya hit one, and she hit the stanky leg. Bro, we had to hold her up. No. We had to hold her up. She came in with too much confidence. Yeah, that tobacco came from Palestine.
Starting point is 00:03:31 Middle Eastern tobacco. It's different, bro. It knows who it's in. Targeted. Yeah, it was just such a great, it was so great, man. I really am really grateful. And how do you feel this morning? Man, I felt like shit, but then I started to recover.
Starting point is 00:03:44 I'm getting good at getting hung over. Oh, shit. I think I'm beating it now. The perks of alcoholism nobody talks about. You get better at dealing with the hangover. Is that it? I think so, bro. I think so. Because the hangover I had a few days ago, I was fucked for the whole day. This one, I was only
Starting point is 00:04:00 fucked for like half of it. So if I keep on drinking, I might not be hungover. I think that's what a lot of these motherfuckers do. These cowards quit before they could fully beat the hangover. You're just breaking through the other side. That's what I do. I drank too much, got in the hot tub, chilled out. You know what I mean? Where's your hot tub?
Starting point is 00:04:18 Just in my house, in the little hot tub. Fell asleep a little bit, woke up. Wow. Yo, you. With everything happening in the Middle Yo, you, with everything happening in the Middle East right now, with everything happening. Your birthday? And my birthday. What are you even talking about? What are you referencing?
Starting point is 00:04:33 You're not my friend. You're not my friend. Yeah, that's not a very friendly comment at all. He couldn't be referencing friends. There's a black guy here. Yeah, exactly. That's a good-ass point. They would never. They would never drown what that's a season two that happens to every character
Starting point is 00:04:51 wait a minute wait are you referencing matthew perry's death who's that oh thank god guys thank god it's just a coincidence what he was talking about oh my god i guess you didn't know that That's why you made that really off-color joke. What are you talking about? Yeah, Matthew Perry, who's an actor from the famous show Friends, has passed away. Tragically. Tragically. He died in a hot tub, just like what you were talking about, but clearly not exactly.
Starting point is 00:05:16 Because you don't even watch TV. You don't even know that show. Never heard of it. So you weren't trying to make some edgy joke, you edge lord. You called me a lord. This is a great title. I like that. What did happen with Matthew Perry, man? This is so tragic. It's sad, yo.
Starting point is 00:05:31 I'm a big Friends fan. We know this. I'm sad about this. This guy died in a hot tub. Struggled with drugs his whole life. We don't know what happened. We're still trying to figure it out. But Mark is full-blown conspiracy theory on this. A lot of people have been talking. I don't think this is true.
Starting point is 00:05:45 This is crazy. Have you seen his most recent Instagram post? Oh, no. Don't tell me it's something with a hot tub. It's something with a hot tub. There's no way there's something with a hot tub shifting. It just seems strange to me. It's him in a hot tub.
Starting point is 00:05:58 And then the caption just says... I don't know what happened. All respect to him and his family, but it also is weird. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Oh, so warm water swirling around makes you feel good. I'm Matt, man. What? Him in a hot tub.
Starting point is 00:06:12 I'm just saying, bro. It's a huge hot tub, by the way. He's got a nice tub. Overlooking LA. Who's taking that picture? George Soros, probably. Oh, my God. Is that him in the corner?
Starting point is 00:06:24 Yeah. Oh, okay. I thought it was just Oh with the beats on yeah Okay. So what do we think happened here? Oh somebody killed him. Yeah. Do you think you think it was a murder? Yeah, why? Look at the evidence. That's all the evidence we need, right? Look at the evidence Guys, we shouldn't be joking around about this I'm not laughing at his death I'm laughing at this
Starting point is 00:06:47 Look at the evidence Come on, man I'm very sad about that Can I ask an honest question? Because I think the outfit is very creative and cool Okay This is an honest question Get your act out ready
Starting point is 00:06:58 It's not Get it ready Alex, I have no act out I just want to let you know Okay So I'm already prepared To you know. Yeah. Okay? So I'm already prepared to just stop at the bomb. Okay.
Starting point is 00:07:09 Okay? I'm not going to act it out. Okay? I just need to understand if this is like a paid thing. You don't have a relationship with the- I do have a relationship with the- Okay. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:23 And then is this part of Halloween? Because it is Halloween. We're filming this on Halloween. Yeah. Let's say I'm Scarecrow. Okay. There we go. You could pass with Scarecrow if I do some shit on right now.
Starting point is 00:07:35 Yeah. Uh-oh. Run it back. Run it back. Run it back. Hold on. Hold on. Oh, Zachary.
Starting point is 00:07:42 I helped you out. I helped you out. What are you doing there? Are you doing like a Zachary? I helped you out right there. Zachary. I helped you out. I helped you out. What are you doing there? Are you doing like a Zachary? I helped you out right there. Zachary? I helped you out. Oh, man.
Starting point is 00:07:51 Fuck you guys. Honestly, that was a good joke. Like, what the fuck? I don't even know if you guys are pulling a prank on me. We're not pulling a prank. We're trying. Why is nobody making fun of Alex's outfit? That's what I need to know. Why are you guys sitting here on the couch?
Starting point is 00:08:10 It's very out there, but it's also kind of flopped. What did I say the first thing I said? That's what I'm saying. So it's like it's hard to make fun of. He bombed so bad it got on our heads. Yeah. Let's get out of our heads. We have to get out of our heads.
Starting point is 00:08:19 He bombed so bad. We have to get out of our heads. Stop affecting us. Because if we go at it, you have to go perfect or else. Yeah. I don't want to be. No, you've got to go perfect or else it's going to be... What would you say if... What if Akash showed up dressed like a
Starting point is 00:08:32 human trafficked... Damn. Act it out. Help me. No, no, no. Don't act it out. Take me back to my family. Take me back to my family in Eastern Europe. Never mind.
Starting point is 00:08:46 Is that? No? Okay. What if Akash came dressed up as that? What would we say? As this? Yeah. That could be my outfit, for real.
Starting point is 00:08:55 That could be my Halloween outfit. Basmati rice. Indian, bag of rice, there you go. That's what I'm doing. I mean, his hips did look like that for a while. Yeah. Like a bag of rice for a minute. Honestly, yeah, we were talking about this before the pod, how miserable you are.
Starting point is 00:09:10 And I need you to just be honest with the people. Are you more miserable now that you're skinny? No, I'm not. It's just not fun. Can you just be honest? I'm being honest. It's not fun trying to be skinny, but being fat sucks more. You can't even stay awake.
Starting point is 00:09:21 That's because I have a cold. Good luck. So there's no negative side effects to diet. Oh, dude, we had a fantastic dinner last night at a place I've wanted to eat at for a long time. Oh, fantastic. Shouts, and then they were just passing delicious plate after delicious plate. Shouts to him.
Starting point is 00:09:40 And every time... Shouts to Emilio. I didn't know if I could say it or not. I said shouts, and I was like, wait, am I talking about... Who ordered the paparazzi? Son, don't talk paparazzi. That was crazy. Who ordered the paparazzi, son?
Starting point is 00:09:52 That was crazy. Somebody did that shit. You ordered the paparazzi. Yo, mad paparazzi waiting outside. You just pop it out here, man. Son, there wasn't even a card in the camera. It was just flash going off. Son, we go outside the restaurant.
Starting point is 00:10:06 We leave. There's mad paparazzi there. I see Charlemagne. I'm thinking they just want pictures of Charlemagne. Charlemagne also brought a congresswoman. They both left, though. So I'm like, oh, I think... What a flex.
Starting point is 00:10:20 Charlemagne goes to my wife, hey, it's going to be me plus three. My wife is like, yeah, that's fine. Andrew's 40th birthday is probably some people that are close to us or whatever. And he just shows up with a fucking congressman. That's a fuck. She walked in and asked me,
Starting point is 00:10:36 she was like, is it cool if I join? I was like, I don't know. You don't need our permission. But then after Charlemagne gets in the car, paparazzi still hanging out. And then Andrew walks out, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash, flash. I thought y'all did this. I was trying to look at the paparazzi and see if it was our friends.
Starting point is 00:10:55 No. Did you hear what Miles said before Miles was killed? What did he say? Because I walked out, and we were the first ones out, and the guys were there. And I was like, Miles was like, dude, there's paparazzi. I was like, what? Are you being serious?
Starting point is 00:11:05 How many? He's like, four. And then he looks, and he goes, oh, fuck. Miles was like, dude, there's paparazzi here. I was like, what? Are you being serious? How many? He's like, four. And then he looks and he goes, oh, fuck. Like three and a half. Turn around. Did you make an off-color joke about a small person? There's a dwarf paparazzo. I forgot I said that. Miles, you can't make off-color jokes like that, man.
Starting point is 00:11:20 Did we see that guy's photos? No, it was all just crotch shots. He got clear shots of me, but not the rest of us. That was not a midget paparazzi. That was a little midget paparazzi.
Starting point is 00:11:32 Oh, I miss the midget. I love midgets. They're just so pleasant to see, man. They make you happy, don't they? They're the best. I hate that we haven't found
Starting point is 00:11:42 a good thing to say about this outfit. I was going to say something, but I was like, fuck, if I bomb again. Just do it. Just do it and act it out. You got it. I was like, you can put the midget in your outfit and toss him. And then do it.
Starting point is 00:11:55 Now do it. Now do it. Come on. Toss it. Toss something. Toss something. Just toss something. Just do it. Come on. Bala, toss it. Toss something. Toss something. Just toss something. Just do it.
Starting point is 00:12:09 Yeah. God. Damn, bro. This one, the second one was a little better than the first one. Yeah, it was a little better. What's your outfit? You haven't dressed your awesome outfit. Come on, take a guess. Take a wild guess. I knew the first one. You said it was a little better. What's your outfit? You haven't dressed your awesome outfit. Come on, take a guess. Take a wild
Starting point is 00:12:26 guess. I knew the first one. You said it was three things. I knew Billy Madison. This is Billy Madison. That's great. What else though? Well, you'll see, man. I have multiple, I have outfit changes during this episode. You think he has all three of them on right now? I thought this could be three things. He hasn't had real food in 72
Starting point is 00:12:42 hours. The cognitive function is very low right now He was around chicken parmesan's last night It was salivating He was angry I remember seeing you go up to get your wife And you were so upset Because there was food on the table you couldn't eat
Starting point is 00:12:53 It's like seeing a married dude at a strip club What is happening right now What was the thing you wanted the most Oh that pasta looked crazy And the dessert. I had a bite of the chocolate cake and a bite of the cheesecake. I saw you take the bite. Your hand was trembling as you put the fork into the cake. The cheesecake,
Starting point is 00:13:11 I was so happy. I was like, this is life. Yeah, that cheesecake was... What are the rest of us doing? What if we do for just this episode, anytime we make a joke, Val is behind us and he has to act it out to the best of his ability. What if that is just part of the episode?
Starting point is 00:13:26 If he's willing, I love that. If you're willing to do it, when we make a good joke, and it's up to you to decide if the joke is good. You guys gotta laugh. I'm heartbroken right now. I don't know if you realize this, Val, but it's funnier when we don't laugh. Yeah, that's true.
Starting point is 00:13:42 I'll take that. I'm so like... We're gaslighting him. I'm in shambles right now that I bombed two times in a row. He's got the ledger in the back. He's got the ledger. It's on the blockchain.
Starting point is 00:13:58 Jesus. He is savage. We got three bombs in a row. Oh my god. Tour announcement. Australia, my God. Tour announcement. Australia, we're coming. Okay? Perth, we added that second show.
Starting point is 00:14:10 Still some tickets available for that. Sydney, we added a second show. Added more seats for that. So grab those while they last. And Brisbane, we added more seats. Thank you so much for selling out these shows. This has been absolutely amazing. And then we're coming back to America. The first three cities are up right now for the Life Tour in
Starting point is 00:14:29 America. Okay, we got Chicago, Boston, and Washington, D.C. We've added second shows in each of those three cities. Go get those tickets right now, dandrashultz.com. Thank you guys so much for the support. I cannot wait for you guys to see this hour. Peace. Also, guys, December 1st and 2nd is sold out in Portland, so we're adding another show. Get your tickets at outcasting.com for that. December 8th, New Orleans. December 17th, 18th, and 19th, Glasgow. We added a
Starting point is 00:14:55 show in London. Glasgow, y'all ain't really buying no tickets. I'm not gonna lie about it. Would love if you did, because I don't want to hate Scotland more than I already do. And this is big. January 6th, 8th, and 9th, I'm coming to see other parts of Europe. I'm going to Oslo, Amsterdam, and Eindhoven.
Starting point is 00:15:12 I don't even know what that is. That sounds like an oven mitt of some kind. But I'm going to be there. Get your tickets at akashsingh.com. Let's sell these hoes out. Anyway, last night was fucking awesome. Thank you guys so much. Have we got decorations in here that are beautiful? Can you address the paparazzi that was real? Bro, you're there now. Paparazzi
Starting point is 00:15:28 hanging out for you. There's no way, dude. Do you remember how he reacted when he came outside? It was almost adorable. He was like, there's no way. He's like a little kid. He put his hands in his pockets. He's like, get the fuck out. Who hired you guys? Who hired you guys? My feeling on the paparazzi is like, so I had like a dude that was famous, lived below me when I was growing up.
Starting point is 00:15:51 I don't want to say his name, but whatever. And there was never paparazzi. And I'm talking about like famous, famous. Yeah, he was like A-list. A-list, famous, famous, still to this day. Never paparazzi. And I'm like, and there was no doorman or nothing on the building. Like they could be right there if they wanted it, never there. So when I saw that,
Starting point is 00:16:10 I was like, oh, this is all by design. Like PR companies are doing, you probably heard about right. So once I saw that, I was like, okay. And now there are certain people I think the paparazzi do attach themselves to. And those are like people who are famous for the sake of being famous. Does that make sense? Like they have that escape velocity with their fame, you know? And,
Starting point is 00:16:30 uh, but I think everyone else just hires the paparazzi around when they have to like drop a movie or an album or something to get some images out there. That's why I saw it. And I was like, I'm not one of those people. Like if you like my comedy, you watch my comedy,
Starting point is 00:16:43 you know who I am, but I'm not like a, where did Andrew Schultz eat dinner tonight? Do you know what I mean? You should have attacked one of them. Bro, that would have been the funniest thing. That would have been good. That's funny.
Starting point is 00:17:01 I literally, I couldn't, I was like, which person is doing this? What a fucking prank. Because the funniest thing would be if one of you guys planned it and then i like took it serious started doing interviews and i was like oh guys come on it's my birthday guys can i have a moment with my wife please like please like want to respect our privacy like having that footage of me taking paparazzi serious as if they should be there for me would be a great prank. Yo, I'm fucking punching one. Yeah. Just send them across my street. What's the point at which it gets annoying?
Starting point is 00:17:31 Put them in a sack and throw them. Now we're talking. Get it! Get it! Fuck you, bro. Fuck all of y'all for laughing at that. No, that was a good joke. Dude. That joke was awesome.
Starting point is 00:17:46 Dude, we just need one more and we can have a sack. Oh! Oh, he did it! Oh, he really went there. That's how it's done, dude. That's how it's done. Oh, that's it! Yeah, you know how fucked you is? You used the word sack twice.
Starting point is 00:18:01 I'm telling you. Get out of the room! Oh, my God. Okay. The best thing happened right after the word sack twice. I'm telling you. Get out of the room. Oh, my God. Okay. The best thing happened right after the paparazzi. Okay, go, go, go. And then one rat took a strike on all of us. The chain reaction of our wives freaking out was so funny.
Starting point is 00:18:17 I know. Dub got on all fours, and he was just scurrying around. And people were terrified, dude dude people were absolutely terrified we're like come on come on get up here do it do it go the act out the act oh my god the dove dove looking for the cheese Oh, man. Oh, my God. That's crazy. He's back, bro. He's back.
Starting point is 00:18:50 Vindicated, bro. I'm back, baby. That red joke is going to get clipped up, and Twitter's going to say, Andrew Schultz just perfectly summed up how the people... You're going viral. You're going viral, baby.
Starting point is 00:19:04 Oh, yeah. Those are some of the birthday decorations Miles got you. Thank you. Just a tombstone. Thank you so much. I'll do my best to not eat this during the podcast. Move it away because you know you're going to eat this. Have you reflected on 40 yet?
Starting point is 00:19:17 Have you taken it in and been like, yo, I'm 40? 39 was way harder. Really? Yeah, 39 was way harder. I remember distinctly feeling that. What did you feel about 39 uh i was uh 39 all the emotions for 40 i felt at 39 and then 40 i think a lot of times there's anxiety for dudes with their age when it comes to like the things that they've achieved in
Starting point is 00:19:37 their life not even just work or just you know like marriage you know family these types of things like where am i on this course that I've plotted for myself? And, um, I feel, I feel really proud. Like I feel happy. I've, I've friends, I have a wife, you know, it was my fucking dream girl. And, um, you know, my family's healthy ish. And, um, so I'm like really proud of where I am in life. So I didn't feel like that anxiety about getting older. But at 39, I was like, oh, I'm no longer young. Does that make sense? Like 38 was the last, I don't know, it's hard to describe.
Starting point is 00:20:16 38 was the last time I could feel young-ish. Okay. 39 feels like 40's coming. At 38, nobody's going, hey, 40's coming. I do feel 40's coming at 39 right now. I feel like, yo like 40 is coming. At 38, nobody's going, hey, 40 is coming. I do feel 40 is coming at 39 right now. I feel like, yo, 40 is coming. You got to start. I never felt super young at 35, 36, but I was like, 40 is coming now.
Starting point is 00:20:34 You're an adult. Yeah. But you've already processed that, so 40 will be fine. Yeah. I remember 30 hit me and then 31 hit me. And I was like, holy shit, this number just keeps going up. Yeah. If you're lucky, it just keeps getting higher. and this and then i was like well that's just life now so it's just gonna keep so i think i will say this though that shit goes by fast bro that shit goes
Starting point is 00:20:56 by fast and there's there's like a socrates quote that i'm gonna butcher, but like it's something about you're playing the game and there's way less time left than you think. So enjoy it. And and it's it is true. Like if I think about how fast 40 years went by. What a fucking. Yeah. Unbelievable. Like.
Starting point is 00:21:23 20 years ago, half of my life ago, feels like last year. Dude, college feels very recent. Living together in that apartment. That was a month ago. Yeah. Yeah, and that was what, 10 years, something like that? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:36 College feels like it wasn't that long ago. For us colleges, 20 years ago, we were freshmen. Yeah. It's crazy. So enjoy it. Soak it up. And that's why our parents are always like oh my god you grow up so fast and i'm even seeing it with my nieces like they're growing up
Starting point is 00:21:50 and so that's i completely get now why when we have kids we're going to do the same thing that the kid gets annoyed with and they're like shut up i'm not growing up and you're like no you you're growing up so fast you have no idea i cherish this i'm gonna miss this you cannot life you can only live it forward. You can only understand it backwards. And my dad always says that thing, youth, why is it wasted on the young? And I don't think that we waste it. I genuinely am very proud of the way that I've, I guess, conducted myself in life. The things that I always wanted and cherished, I have.
Starting point is 00:22:21 Lots of great friends, building businesses, making money together, you know, creating security for ourselves, family, that kind of stuff. So that I feel very good about, but it is lightning fast, this life. Yeah. And I feel like it just gets faster and faster. You know, it's like, what is it? A centrifugal force, centripetal force, like the further out you go, the faster you're going to keep up. That's life. Yeah. Like the further away you're going from day one, the faster it fucking feels.
Starting point is 00:22:52 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Unbelievable. Well, man, you are. I texted you this, but I thought I was going to miss this episode. But you are. I want to say because you don't get often to be gay without being called gay. And this is like your 40th birthday. You are an inspiration to me.
Starting point is 00:23:05 And then there's a part of me that's always like, man, I want to beat Schultz to something. Let me do something first. And I thought about, I was like, I've learned so much from watching you be first at everything. You really inspire me beyond just like the work ethic and all the stuff you've done for me with the pod. Just watching you get more famous every day and become a better person every day. I don't know if you understand how fucking rare that is. And I love you.
Starting point is 00:23:27 And I'm so proud of you. And I'm so inspired. You're my brother. I just want to say that publicly. I don't know if people get how rare you are as like someone who's trying to be a better person while getting more and more successful. Yeah. That's thank you, man.
Starting point is 00:23:40 I mean, of course, man. And that's the, that's, that would be the goal. Yeah. I mean, that's why that would be the goal. Yeah. I mean, that's why it was so awesome having everybody there yesterday. It was just looking around this group of people that I genuinely care about and want everybody to succeed. That's like, what a great gift. I mean, I said it yesterday, but it's like, yeah, I don't know. I don't know if the quality of your life is judged
Starting point is 00:24:06 by like how many people would do things for you. I think it's like how many people you would do things for, because that's, that's like a really deep connection that you have with those people, those people you want to protect, you want to care for, you want to, you know, see flourish. Right. And, um, I was looking around this room and I was like really excited by everybody there. And, and it was, really excited by everybody there. And it was, I mean, everybody from Charlemagne was so instrumental in like everything that I've been able to do. And obviously you building this with you and then seeing Mark, you going out to create Camp and all this other success and stand up and just crushing it. And then Alex, obviously with WTF. And I'm just looking around all these different people.
Starting point is 00:24:44 And it was just like even my friends from like high school and college. And it was like, wow, this is pretty awesome. This is really awesome. So I think that's what that, it was easier to like hit 40, knowing that I have this room full of people that I'm like building things with. Yeah. Building with your friends is crazy, dude. I was telling them last week, weren't even reflecting, but I was just like, oh, you know what's wild? Andrew and I started this podcast in his parents' apartment on his laptop. He don't even use a computer anymore. That's how long ago.
Starting point is 00:25:11 So it's just very cool. This is an opportunity to look back and be like, wow, man, this is a fucking... We did some very cool things. Yeah, and just awesome what you guys did for me, making that day really special. Of course. Yeah, never forget that. That was so cool. And I hope we continue to do that for everybody.
Starting point is 00:25:27 I know we throw birthdays for everybody here. And I think it's important because on that day, they should know that people care about them. It's very easy to feel like very easy to feel like maybe people don't if nobody shows up for you that day. And all the rest of the days are just
Starting point is 00:25:43 kind of pleasantries. But yeah, it was cool. Very that day. And all the rest of the days are just kind of pleasantries. But yeah, it was cool. Very cool day. And we're back, baby! We are back. Sick outfit change? Yeah. Oh yeah, I had to get my outfit changed. Is this Spongebob? I'm Spongebob Squarepants. Okay.
Starting point is 00:25:59 What did I just tell you? You were pissed off about my favorite cartoon. Yeah, but did you know that your favorite cartoon is built on a lie? Okay. What is the lie? He doesn't have pants, bro. Okay. Yeah, he does. He doesn't have one. He doesn't have pants.
Starting point is 00:26:15 Where? He has pants. They're shorts. They're shorts. Spongebob square shorts. And you know what? Those are just Andrew Lentz pants right there. Why do you think I'm Spongebob Square shorts. And you know what? All the shorts are square. No, no, no. Those are just Andrew Lent pants right there. Exactly. Why do you think I'm Spongebob Square pants? Finally.
Starting point is 00:26:31 That makes sense. He's been riding me this whole time. And they are rectangular in a lot of ways. All right. Fair enough. Fuck it. So you might be right, bro. You're not wearing the costume properly.
Starting point is 00:26:41 Yeah. What is going on, son? The pants didn't go down far enough, so I had to put the head by the dick. You made him a glory hole. That's crazy, bro. Who brought that up? Oh, yo. So we're hanging out.
Starting point is 00:26:58 So what's happened after I left, bro? After you left, shit got lit. I ain't gonna lie. God damn. Shit got lit. We're at Champion Pizza. Shout out to Champion Pizza. And Foda is, Foda out of nowhere.
Starting point is 00:27:16 I don't even know why he said this. He goes, oh yeah, did y'all hear about the story where the dad got head from his daughter in a glory hole? Which, banger, opening line, though. Yeah, and everybody's like, no, we didn't hear about that story. Why don't you explain it? And then where is it? It's in Germany or something like that? It's in Amsterdam.
Starting point is 00:27:39 Dad goes to this glory hole spot, like, what is it, father, like daughter or whatever. The daughter is at the glory hole spot. Allegedly, she's blowing dudes in a glory hole spot like, what is it, father like daughter or whatever. The daughter is at the glory hole spot. Allegedly, she's blowing dudes in a glory hole. Dad gets blown, pulls up over the curtain. Yeah. Daughter. This went viral on Twitter recently. This can't be real.
Starting point is 00:27:58 That's what people are saying. I choose not to believe it because it's insane, but apparently it's real. Dub, if it was a cousin, would it be cool? Oh, yeah. They rehashed this whole thing last night. You know. You know.
Starting point is 00:28:11 They rehashed this whole thing. Wait, what do you mean? What happened? They brought up his sisters. What about them? No. What about them? What about them?
Starting point is 00:28:19 His whole story fell apart. His whole story fell apart. And Vala was so hurt by it. Don't believe it. Don't believe it. No, no, no. Don't believe it. No, no, no. Don't believe it. They made that shit up.
Starting point is 00:28:26 Mark and Dove had a powwow behind the scenes. It'd be like, yo, can you clear that up for me? No, no, no, no, no. Is that true? Dove came to the table like, guys, I was lying. You know, I was just making the whole thing up. But then Mark's wife was like, no, you weren't. That was weird.
Starting point is 00:28:41 That was weird. And she was like, wait, what are you talking about? I remember this. weren't that was weird that was weird she was like wait what are you talking about i remember this so dove said oh he's just lying about mark and his sisters and the you know whatever you tried to back off of that funny thing you said about mark's family and then vala looks at obviously goes wait it's not real and it hurt me so bad that i'm i'm doubling back down it is real it really happened it did i knew it a version of it. I'm just trying to soften the... I want to get back to where we were before. Also, the cousin
Starting point is 00:29:08 thing, your girl defended me. No. That is true. She's weird with that. That made me look at her a little bit. Your girl said that she would smash out a cousin. She said that it wasn't weird that his cousin was giving
Starting point is 00:29:24 double lap dance. She said that wasn't weird weird that his cousin was giving Dub a lap dance. She said that wasn't weird. In Toronto, when your cousin was giving you a lap dance. And you were popcorn on her. You were doing that. Show her the sponge, Bob. You were hitting her with the sponge. You had that sponge bobbing.
Starting point is 00:29:42 I'm ready. Sponge was bobbing, bro. You remember. You remember. But yeah, she said that wasn't weird. And I'm like, ah, babe, come on, bro. I don't know. Yeah, that's fucking weird.
Starting point is 00:29:55 She also said Dove's lie about me wasn't weird. You remember that? Yeah, but that, she's European. But it's not a lie. Nah, but she's European. They walk around topless. So for her to say this. Being naked with your family is fine.
Starting point is 00:30:06 Because I'm European. Be careful crossing your legs, bro. Why? The camera is getting a view. Is it coming out? Is the package coming out? Am I fluffed? Hold on.
Starting point is 00:30:14 I'm going to fluff. You're giving him the ice spice right there. You're giving him the ice spice. Does ice spice have a fat ass or not? Yes. Whoa, whoa, whoa. I mean, with all due respect, I don't know. It's not the craziest ass I've ever seen.
Starting point is 00:30:28 Nah, chill out, bro. Nah, I feel like people are inflating her ass. Nah, nah, nah. Oh, it's inflated. But it's real. That's why it's so impressive. Okay, so there we go. No, she has a beautiful body.
Starting point is 00:30:41 She's a very pretty girl. Don't get me wrong. But people are like, yo, the ass, the ass, the ass. We have seen larger asses. Is this fair? We have, but they're usually augmented. So we haven't really seen bodies like this that are just born. So we talk about asses, Al's using SAT words.
Starting point is 00:30:54 Ain't that crazy? Oh, I was just saying. Ain't that crazy? He's a connoisseur. Yeah. He's a connoisseur. He's an aficionado. I like it.
Starting point is 00:31:01 I can dissect this one. Okay, so. Nah, she looked crazy hot in that Betty Boop outfit. Adorable. Boop. Yeah. Ad can dissect this one. Okay, so. Nah, she looked crazy hot in that Betty Boop outfit. Adorable. Boop. Yeah. Adorable. Adorable.
Starting point is 00:31:07 Also, without the hair, without her typical, what is it called? The raggedy Ann. Yeah, without the raggedy Ann. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yo, I just now realized she had. I mean, it looks so much better, right? She looks so much better. She's stunning.
Starting point is 00:31:21 Look how stunning that is. Beautiful she is. Crazy. I did not even realize that. But the hair's iconic, though. The hair's iconic. I get it 100%. Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 00:31:29 No, she killed it, though. Respect. Shout out to Eyes. Al, with all due respect, is there anything else you'd like to share? No, absolutely not. With all due respect. I can't even respect anymore.
Starting point is 00:31:38 Wait, why? I guess. It's that much? Is that crazy? No, I'm just saying. The performance is great. Back. Yeah, yeah, yeah. saying the performance is great. Back... Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:45 The music performance is great. Al tweeted, has that Betty Boop red dress gone viral yet? Twitter Al is a wild boy. What time? What time? What time is it?
Starting point is 00:31:54 It was late? Oh, damn. That's bad. I got to delete that one. I got to delete that one. Al gets on Twitter late at night. He gets wild.
Starting point is 00:32:02 We got to talk about Hasan Minhaj. Yeah, we we do free his son like we've been saying yeah we have this whole time we were saying that was a lying ass bitch in the new yorker yeah absolutely how dare she absolutely how dare she tell the exact truth and then him go on camera and say yeah you were right, but you were wrong. Now, I will say this. I was right about the high school girl. Remember I said the high school girl was racist?
Starting point is 00:32:32 You were right about that. Because I said he was too cute to be rejected. So it had to be racism. I knew what I was saying about that one. But the other two ones, yeah, he did lie about it. Yeah, yeah. Right? I mean, if a white powder falls on my daughter i don't
Starting point is 00:32:46 think if it's a prank i'm gonna be like we don't need to check this out we don't need to go to the hospital she got it's a prank yeah i think you're gonna be like hey there's white powder on my daughter let's go to the fucking hospital just to make sure she's not dying yeah let's call a doctor i'm indian i probably know some doctors let's just see what's going on i just think the same thing exists for the you know from the last conversation we said where it's like if you're lying to make it funnier, it's great. Do it. Do it. And if you are lying to be some sort of hero or to increase victimization, then it's corny.
Starting point is 00:33:14 Yeah. And I don't think he said anything in the video that disputed that. Yeah. Outside of the girl situation, which I knew she was a fucking racist bitch this whole time. I knew that. That's married to this whole time. I knew that. That's married to a brown guy. That's what she's guilty. That's what these white people do.
Starting point is 00:33:30 They're guilty, bro. They marry what they hate. They're like, I need to make their lives miserable. They hate us so they make us. That's it, bro. Think about it. If you're a woman, you hated brown men. What's the number one way to drive one fucking crazy?
Starting point is 00:33:46 Marry that brown motherfucker. You're going to be miserable. You really want me to get driven crazy? Let him marry a brown girl. That's true. You know what I mean? But they're selfish. These white women are selfish.
Starting point is 00:33:56 They want to inflict the pain. That's true. They don't want to give all that joy to a brown woman to drive a brown man crazy. They're like, no, that's for me. So, yeah, free Hassan from that white bitch. Free Hassan, bro. But I gotta say, he's fucking fantastic. Did you guys watch the video?
Starting point is 00:34:13 He's fantastic. Even though the whole time he's just saying exactly what everybody criticized him for, he's going, yeah, I did lie to increase victimization, which is the criticism. He's not saying, oh, I didn't lie to make it funner. He's like, did lie to increase victimization, which is the criticism. He's not saying, I didn't lie to make it funner. He's like, I lied to increase victimization.
Starting point is 00:34:28 And the whole time I'm watching it and going, I know you're agreeing with the criticism, but you're saying it in a way that vindicates you. And I agree with you. This guy's good. That's how I felt after. For real, Hamas need to hire him. Do you know what i mean like for profit or the idf but one of them need to get on this motherfucker for real both sides i mean incredible yeah he's very charming he's charming yeah white
Starting point is 00:34:56 bitch devil how dare how does white devil play him like that how dare she and how she blaming on her family when you knew it was her? That's fucked up. Maybe she loved him so much she was like, I can't make this brown guy miserable. Oh. I got to find the next one. It was true love. It might have been true love.
Starting point is 00:35:15 Holy shit. That's beautiful. But yeah, I think that's really the issue. And you got to get these jokes, man. You got to get these jokes. If you do some goofy shit like that, you're going to get these jokes. But it was very well done. I'm not going to lie. It was handled very well. He's a smart guy. It was handled
Starting point is 00:35:29 very, very well. The kid's good. The kid's good. I think he went a little easy on the white girl, though. She should have got it worse. What would you have done? I would have doxxed her. What?
Starting point is 00:35:44 Do you know what that means? Yup. What does it mean? It's when you send a white powder. No, that's not Doxin. That's not Doxin. That's not anthrax. That's Doxin, I thought. When you send a white powder to somebody and you open it, you know how you open envelopes over your kid's head?
Starting point is 00:36:00 You know how when you're going through mail, you put your kid right underneath it and then you open it up? Yeah. That's what I thought it is. Especially when I'm getting death threats. That's why I want a daughter. Exactly. I just want her to open it for me. Yeah, when I get a piece of mail from a no-return address, I just get my child, and then I open it up upside down over them, just in case, because you never know.
Starting point is 00:36:18 Do you know what I mean? Yeah, you can't have it land on me. Yeah. And then you got this white bitch. This white bitch, dude. You know what I mean? This white bitch. How dare she? That's the you got this white bitch. This white bitch, dude. You know what I mean? This white bitch. How dare she?
Starting point is 00:36:27 That's the issue with this white bitch. Take down Hassan Minhaj. Yeah. Guys, that's his name. Why are we even laughing at that? That's how you pronounce his name. For emphasis on it in a way I didn't expect. Minhaj.
Starting point is 00:36:38 Yeah. That sounds correct. I'm pronouncing it correct. Mm-hmm. Hassan. Hassan. Minhaj. What's going on? I don't know, Al. He's in a loop. He'm pronouncing it correct. Hassan, Hassan, Minhaj. What's going on?
Starting point is 00:36:47 I don't know, Al. He's in a loop. He's in a feedback loop. I think I am. I think I am. So free Hassan. Free Hassan. Lock up the white bitch.
Starting point is 00:36:57 And then third of all, we need to get this guy hired for some sort. You know who needs him bad right now? Ukraine, bro. Because all the energies in the Middle East, nobody's giving a fuck about Ukraine anymore. They need a great propagandist that can sell you anything. And I don't know if there's anybody better than Hassan. Man, Haas right now. He could be president.
Starting point is 00:37:17 Bruh? He could be president. You really want to take down Trump? Take down Trump. Holy shit. Oh, that would be fire. That would be kind of awesome, actually. Holy shit.
Starting point is 00:37:27 Yeah. Born in very racist Davis, California. A lot of racism in Northern California. No Indians. A lot of racism. I need to see that acceptance speech from him. When he gets up there and he's like, four score and seven years. Our forefathers.
Starting point is 00:37:44 All right, guys. We're going to take a break for a second. Before I talk about this next sponsor, I want to tell a quick story. I got to meet a dude named Saad Chowdhury. And he'd been a fan for a while, big fan of the flagrancy and the stand-up. And I was in London when I met him after the show at Royal Albert Hall. And when we were talking, I didn't know that he was going to be one of the sponsors of the show. But he told me when he was listening to the pod earlier on, he was developing his career.
Starting point is 00:38:08 He was making these video games. He's like, one day I want to be able to sponsor flagrant. That would be so incredible. And his career started to rise and our show started to get more popularity. And we had this cool conversation, the bowels of Royal Albert hall. Um, or he's like, I can't believe we're going to sponsor it. I'm like oh what is it and basically he created the number one pool uh game in the world i mean i have over
Starting point is 00:38:30 1 billion downloads 10 million people playing it every single day i mean it's it's really amazing it's called eight ball pool anyway i thought it was really cool that asshole army member uh had built a business and um and now we're actually getting to work together, which is pretty fucking awesome. So I want you guys to all go check out his game. They've got real multiplayer, weekly events,
Starting point is 00:38:56 tournaments happening all the time. And in fact, what we're doing is we're working on setting up an exclusive flagrant collab. So we'll have more details
Starting point is 00:39:02 dropping soon. But for now, I want you to download 8 Ball Pool on your phone. You can download for free, okay? You can even scan this QR code and you start playing it to practice. You get to level five
Starting point is 00:39:13 to be involved because the number one flagrant player is in for two tickets to one of my shows. Flights and accommodation paid for. They got it. So shouts aside, aside man congratulations on all your
Starting point is 00:39:27 success keep on building we're gonna keep on building and uh really cool to be working together so make sure you don't miss this okay we're all in major announcement cooking up with eight ball pool very soon and um yeah uh i'm i'm stoked for you my bro very stoked for you dude continue success and it's fun too I suck at regular pool. I could play this. I'm so bad at regular pool. I could play this. I'm actually shocked you're bad at pool.
Starting point is 00:39:50 So bad. You have good coordination. I know. You would think. And you would think I would know the angles, but no, I just don't. I'll hit like two or three amazing shots and then miss eight in a row. Huh. Don't make any sense.
Starting point is 00:40:01 Yeah. You're like so coordinated. I think I'm in my head a little bit. Yeah. That's like really surprising. We were even talking about you with, we were playing Padel and why you're good at it. I mean, like you still have to get the tennis rust off. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:40:15 But like you're just naturally coordinated. Yeah. More than it looks like. I wouldn't, yeah. I wouldn't say you're like freakishly athletic. Yeah. But your coordination. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:40:24 Like you can pick up dance moves really well. Like. Just being at practice in a bar by yourself. Ping pong. You athletic. Yeah. But your coordination, like you can pick up dance moves really well. You just be in a practice in a bar by yourself. Ping pong. You know, yeah, absolutely. No, no, I know you're fucking busting balls,
Starting point is 00:40:32 but I mean that sincerely. So pool seems like... Seems like it would be and it drives me crazy. I think it's too much time to think. I need something that's a little bit more reflexive. I can't really think.
Starting point is 00:40:41 Just get it. You're getting in your head about the shot. Oh, do I have the angle right? Am I hitting too hard, too soft? Am I going to leave it in the pocket? Whereas ping pong, you don't have time to react. It's very quick.
Starting point is 00:40:51 All reaction. You don't have time to think. Okay. All right. That makes sense. I can get on board with that. All right, guys. We're going to take a break for a second.
Starting point is 00:40:57 Listen, it's time to learn another language. Okay? Open up the world to yourself. It was the best thing I ever did. I did it the old fashion way. I had to go to another country and just live there and not be able to speak for a year and slowly figure it out. Then work in restaurants for years after that. What I want you to do is learn the language in the most easy, effective way. And Babbel has got your back, okay? I'm telling you, Babbel is the perfect language learning tool. Instead of paying hundreds of dollars for a private tutor or fooling yourself with the
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Starting point is 00:41:53 And they teach you the grammar. They teach you accent, pronunciation. It might not be as perfect as living there, but it's the best thing you can do, especially grammar if you're learning a new language. It's hard. Yeah, so basically if you want to learn another language, shit, learn to learn three, learn them all. Babbel has got your back and we have a special, okay. Limited time deal for our listeners to get you started right now. You get 55% off your Babbel subscription, but only for our listeners at babbel.com slash flagrant. Get 55% off at babbel.com slash flagrant. That is spelled B-A-B-B-E-L.com.
Starting point is 00:42:26 Rules and restrictions may apply. Thanks for helping my handy, Babbel. All right, Mark. We went out last night. And we engaged in some nice, fun hypotheticals with the boys. Yeah. Okay? Colm, Foda, Joey Avery.
Starting point is 00:42:43 Joey Avery. Miles was there. Miles McCreary. Okay. Now, there were some interesting questions asked, posed by Colm and yourself. Where should we start? So one that me and Colm have debated for a very long time. Yes.
Starting point is 00:42:57 For hours, actually. Is would you rather get with a girl, 28 years old, you're going to get with her. You might marry this woman that's had zero bodies or 100 bodies. I think we know how I answer that question. I think that's quite logical, Al. Yeah. So initially, I'm leaning towards zero because hundreds a lot. Hundreds a lot.
Starting point is 00:43:21 Hundreds a lot. She's 28 years old. Pounded. But never had sex, though. She's 20 years old. Pounded. But never had sex, though. She didn't know what she was doing. I'm assuming religion is involved somehow. You got a teacher. Here's the thing.
Starting point is 00:43:31 It don't take that long to learn. That's what I was trying to tell them. I've been fucking the same way since like the third time I fucked. I don't think I got any better. Probably not fucking good. On his back. On my back. On my back. You love on his back. On my back.
Starting point is 00:43:46 You love on your back. I've transitioned to becoming lazy. That's not lazy. That's cool. That's all cool. Come on, bro. Yeah, literally. Come on, bro.
Starting point is 00:44:00 Come on, bro. Y'all can't look me in the eyes while I pop comp. I'm looking you in the eyes right now. comp. I'm looking at you right in the eyes right now. No, I'm saying like you can learn sex quick and ain't that crazy. So this idea like, oh, my God, the girl doesn't know how to fuck. You could teach him how to fuck within five sessions. It's not paddle. Yeah, but we're our age.
Starting point is 00:44:19 You know what I mean? It's not hard. We're built to be good at this shit. Wait, but are we also 20 in this hypothetical or we're our age right now? Whatever you want. Because I'm too old to be teaching some bitch shit. You teach people how to set up studios. You can't teach a girl how to top?
Starting point is 00:44:37 And now you can teach her exactly what you like. Yo, isn't teaching a girl how to suck dick a little gay? Yeah, just like squeeze and really suck the head of it. Like, you acting it out yourself. Spit, spit, spit. It's like a little gay, right? Like, how do you know this so well?
Starting point is 00:44:58 That's a good point, actually. But then what's the alternative? You don't teach them? You got to be like, you know, try, I don't know, watch some shit. You got to show it a video. For y'all that's experienced, if we talked, it would be gay. It would be like, how do y'all know this? And I'd be like, well, I Wikipedia'd it.
Starting point is 00:45:14 Have you watched that Orono? Haven't you watched that Orono before? Yeah, sure. Yeah, I guess that's a... But that's also gay because then you're like, damn, this guy's getting his dick sucked so good. I had a different mission than taking notes at the time, though. Yeah. You're just staring at this guy's dick getting sucked so awesome. But you're taking notes from her perspective.
Starting point is 00:45:27 And that's gay. I guess it might be a tad bit. Yeah. So I guess you just have to say nothing and just tolerate it. No, you can't do that. So how do you make it, like, secretly get it in her brain? While she's sleeping, maybe? Don't nut.
Starting point is 00:45:39 What? Have them fail. Oh, really? You have to have them fail. Unfortunately. No participation trophies. No participation trophies. Back in the day, I did that one.
Starting point is 00:45:50 That shit worked. That will work. Try, bud. Yes. It's dead ass. Never in their life have they experienced a situation where they couldn't get a guy to come. Usually. I mean, it is groundbreaking for a woman to go through that.
Starting point is 00:46:04 So when they don't, they're like, I need to get better at this. I need to know how you ended it, to be honest. How did you end it, though? What did you say? No, I was like, it's just not really doing it. You're on X Factor. That's a no for me, though.
Starting point is 00:46:21 Randy Johnson, what's a motherfucker's name? Randy Jackson. And what happened next, though? Shorty came back with a venture. Gave her a few videos. Got a ticket to Hollywood. Hell yeah, baby. The Golden Buzzer.
Starting point is 00:46:34 No, it's crazy. It really works. Nah, it does work. I know. My boy dated this girl for a year because he didn't know the first time they tried to fuck. She liked him for a year. Like, her whole psyche was destroyed. She's a beautiful girl. Used to getting whatever guy she wants. She liked him for a year. Her whole psyche was destroyed. She's a beautiful girl. Used to getting whatever guy she
Starting point is 00:46:47 wants. She can't even make the guy come. She's like, I need to get this guy to come so I can feel good about myself. Who was your boy? Oh. Yeah. Just believe me.
Starting point is 00:47:03 That makes so much sense. I think he had a problem nutting, to be honest. Why don't they make that as a supplement? Say it? Well, they give you a supplement that makes you not nut. It's a donut pill. 100%. And then any girl that you hook up with will like you forever.
Starting point is 00:47:14 Yeah, no, there was a number condom, I had that shit, and I fucked, I told you this story. Yeah, yeah. Where the material's on the inside, but I opened up the Jimmy and I didn't know which was in or out because it's dark. So I rolled the shit on the wrong way. And you can only just get it a little bit, right? So then I had to take my fingers and flip it.
Starting point is 00:47:34 So now I got the number shit all over my fingers. And I started touching her pussy. Now this girl's numb. I'm fucking numb. It's just two dolls fucking. Your fingers are numb? Everything's numb. She can't feel shit. I can't feel shit. Nobody enjoying this. It's just two dolls fucking. Your fingers are numb? Everything's numb. She can't feel shit. I can't feel shit.
Starting point is 00:47:46 Nobody enjoying this. It was dark. We both fake nutted. We were like, uh-huh. You couldn't see anything. You have a fake nut? Oh, yeah. You spit on their back or you got it in the condom? Oh, really?
Starting point is 00:48:01 I hit her with one of these. Johnny Rocket? Yo, that's crazy. Nah, really? I hit one of these. Johnny Rocket? Yo, that's crap. But I have fake nutted, though. Sometimes you got to because if you feel the dick getting soft, it's better to fake nut than go soft in a girl.
Starting point is 00:48:18 That's too embarrassing. Y'all don't even know what that is. Sometimes I was just tired. Yeah. I'm tired. You can't just call it off you can't just like you know eighth round nah they their fucking psyche is gonna be broken but you've done that to a girl yeah if i wanted to break a fucking psyche that's what i actually like i want to preserve it did you give her a hug after like after you
Starting point is 00:48:41 told her to call it off like do you feel bad no bad? No, this is Al, dude. I can see him being like... Most guys would be like, yo, this shit happens. I'd be like, this never happened. I don't know what the fuck's going on. Did you take the wheels? I don't want to come quick, matter of fact. Did you start jerking off in front of her? Like, hold on, I got this.
Starting point is 00:48:56 I got it. That's the worst. If you're like, yo, just let me take care of this. Has it happened to you, Doug? Yeah. You ever get soft on a girl? With a condom on? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:04 Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah. So I fake nutted. You did? You ever get soft on a girl? With a condom on? Yeah. Yeah, exactly. So I fake nutted. You did? Let's see your fake nut. You first. Nah, I asked you first. Come on.
Starting point is 00:49:15 That's how you do it. I went like this. I went like this when I fake nutted. I like push out. She's on top, obviously. I push up and I went, Ha! It's kind of like that. It's karate.
Starting point is 00:49:30 You got to do a karate move. Yo, hit it, hit it. Let me see the face. You got to do a couple of body jerks. That's good, that's good. That was nice, dude. Pretty good, pretty good, pretty good. Yeah, you got to go. Yo, that's fire.
Starting point is 00:49:44 That was convincing. That was fire. I thought you just came right back. Son, that's fire. That was convincing. That was fire. I thought you just came right back. Son, that was fire. I thought he got turned on by me. The silence was where it's at, dude. That was good. Oh, the silence, yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:56 You put the audible sound on the third side. Didn't they believe it? A little stutter in the knees. And then you got to fall down to the side. Oh, shit. Like, you got to curse a little bit. You got to aim. Oh, shit.
Starting point is 00:50:07 Fuck. Oh, fuck. And turn your back to them so you can take the condom on really quick and tie it up. Run to the bathroom. Run to the bathroom. Oh, fuck. Oh, shit. We teach it to people at home, man.
Starting point is 00:50:19 Yeah, that's how you fake nut. Yeah, they need that. All right? They need that. They really do. They need to do it. Because sometimes these girls got gaping boxes. Yup.
Starting point is 00:50:26 What? What? Oh my God. Sometimes there ain't enough friction, bro. Y'all wouldn't know, man. Y'all really wouldn't know. I wouldn't. I don't get why you can't just level with them.
Starting point is 00:50:42 With all due respect, I'm assuming both of your wives don't have gaping boxes. With all due respect. With all due respect. That's super respectful. I had no issue with that. With all due respect, they don't have it.
Starting point is 00:50:58 That's wild. They don't have that. What do you want me to say? The opposite. You think they got... No, don't say that. Don't say the opposite. I'm not going to say the opposite. I know they don't got some fucking planters down there.
Starting point is 00:51:11 You're not going to put a ficus? You know what I mean? We married good girls. With all due respect, I think the same of your wife. You know it. I'll never disrespect your wife or Al's future wife
Starting point is 00:51:26 like that. Al's future wife, definitely. I'm completely respected. They don't got boxes like some of these. These girls' doves be nothing inside of? Bro, what? Why is he inside of his hallway? He be fucking girls
Starting point is 00:51:42 with vaulted ceilings. They're woman and bitches. Yo, son. You have sex with girls that are looser in their vaginas? Not ideally, no. But does that happen? But it's happened. There's surprises sometimes, but no.
Starting point is 00:51:56 And what does it feel like? Just fucking a timberland? You just go in there and it's like interstellar. There's just this void. Just nothing on the other side of the wall Dub, you need to find a wife, bro Help! You need to find a wife
Starting point is 00:52:11 He wants it, bro Because he's getting close to that age where if you're still single People don't think you're gay Oh, shit He is an interesting point Guys get to a certain age If you're still single But he gets enough pussy where I don't think that that's going to be questioned conversation yeah but never married you don't
Starting point is 00:52:28 even have like divorce two times maybe get divorced that could be good like that like just getting one divorce could be good for you yeah but no no just going on some lovely dates any uh i'm tired of the charade that he wants somebody long term. He does. He's lying to himself. He's lying to himself. You never saw me in love. I saw him in love. Oh, God. I'm so tired of this fucking 23-year-old love story.
Starting point is 00:52:53 I know. Oh, when I was 17, I was so in love, and I haven't been able to recreate it with anyone. Well, let me tell you. I'm going to tell you that story when I'm 60, if I don't find that again. This is a path, guys. But she wasn't Jewish,
Starting point is 00:53:04 so you wouldn't have been able to be with her. She's the non-Jew that the family would have accepted. Wow. You sound like Al Bundy for sex. My high school years. Yeah, the high school. Threw four touchdowns in one game. Damn, bro.
Starting point is 00:53:20 No, no, I've been in love a few times. Would you rather 100 bodies or zero bodies? The number, it's like if you threw a number like 40 or something like that, now you get into the ballpark. 100 is crazy. That's why it's a good hypothetical. She's 32, imagine, in this hypothetical.
Starting point is 00:53:35 And now change the number. It's 100 still? Son, he just said no to 32. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. No matter how old you are. 32 is a lovely age. I'll say that I would pick 100 bodies no no something's up it's zero I'm going on respect
Starting point is 00:53:52 yeah right you have to pick another number you answer this one would you rather um 50 black guys or or 50 black guys or 75
Starting point is 00:54:10 Asian dudes have been with a girl. You have to choose between two of them. It's easy. What is it? The ages. We have to adjust the numbers. This is where it gets really funny.
Starting point is 00:54:23 You have 300 Asians. Like in Sparta? We have to adjust the numbers. This is where it gets really funny. 300 Asians. Like in Sparta. What's the conversion rate? What's the number? 25 black guys. Jamaican and Nigerian. Whatever the other thing is. Is that?
Starting point is 00:54:41 You just picked like, come on, son. So 25 or 100 white guys. 100 whites. You just picked like Come on, son So, so 25 or 100 white guys 100 whites Wow Change it up even more Change it up even more Change it up even more
Starting point is 00:54:53 Seven black guys But like big No, but which blacks? Because you were buried Francis, you got it Son A thousand anything Son
Starting point is 00:55:02 You crazy? Son That's like going up after Chappelle. I'm good. Fuck that shit. All right. Come on. One Francis Ngannou. Okay.
Starting point is 00:55:15 That I could maybe do. 50 Asian dudes. 50? So now y'all see why white people feel that way. Wait, why? Because you feel that way. Yeah, but y'all not Asian. But we still afraid of black dick.
Starting point is 00:55:37 We don't want black dick mucking about our women. Destroying everything. Ruining the neighborhood. Nah, but I'm God who is crazy. I'm saying. That's crazy. That's a scary man.
Starting point is 00:55:48 And he soft spoken while he fucking grew up. Yeah, I know, too. You heard him say that. That lullaby voice. Give it a moment. Give it a moment. The whole thing will get you. A lovable origin story.
Starting point is 00:56:01 Oh, no. You can't even hate on him. Yeah. So isn't that crazy? How do other ethnicities fit into the hierarchy? Okay. Okay. Ready?
Starting point is 00:56:10 This is actually a good one. 45 Mexican dudes. Okay. Okay. All at once. They're hard workers. They're hard workers. They're going to put in work.
Starting point is 00:56:19 They're going to eat pussy crazy. Yeah. Yeah. 45 Mexican dudes. All in the same van, pulling up. That's it, right? They call your girl Home Depot. That's chilling outside.
Starting point is 00:56:32 Everybody calls your girl Home Depot. That's what everybody calls your girl now. Home Depot. Yo, y'all do some of these. Why is it always my girl? Hey, what's going on here? Or.
Starting point is 00:56:46 Or. Come on. Or. Or. 15 Dagestanis in an airport. 15 angry airport Dagestanis. They think your girl's Jewish. No. 15 Dagestanis in. They think your girl's Jewish. 15 Dagestanis in an airport thinking your girl's Jewish.
Starting point is 00:57:10 I'm going to go with the Mexicans. You have to, right? I have to. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You think Dagestanis are good lovers, though? I mean, I think they'll have top positions. I think they can definitely get top positions whenever they want. And no stash.
Starting point is 00:57:24 They probably eat box crazy. Oh, they are mucking. Yeah, they can definitely get top positions wherever they want. And no stash. They probably eat box crazy. Oh, they are mucking. They are going for it. Built for munching. And are they circumcised Russians? Have to be. Right? Must be.
Starting point is 00:57:33 Oh, wow. Yeah, have to be. It's cold over there, bro. They need it. Muzzy. Wow. I'm just saying, bro. That was crazy.
Starting point is 00:57:41 That fucking airport shit was terrifying. Yeah, that was wild. Did you see the video of that? Yeah. That was wild. I liked that the captain was like,, that was wild. Did you see the video of that? Yeah. That was wild. I liked that the captain was like, please don't open the door. And I was like, who's going to open the door? The captain was telling them not to open it?
Starting point is 00:57:51 Yeah, he was like, please don't open the door under any circumstances. I was like, yeah, dude, it's the purge outside. It literally looked like that. Yeah. Yeah, it was wild. I mean, there could have been a Dagestani on the plane be like, I'm pulling this slide. Sleeper cell? Oh.
Starting point is 00:58:04 He was inside the whole time? Why would he be in Tel Aviv? If you guys don't know what we're talking about, there was this plane that flew, I guess, from Tel Aviv and it had to stop to get refueled, I think, in Dagestan. Apparently, the Dagestanians heard about it and they rushed to the airport. Chimp empire style.
Starting point is 00:58:20 This shit was crazy. Are you letting us see that? I think because they're white. The TSA was like, I ain't fucking with these motherfuckers. This shit was crazy. Are you allowed to see that? Are you allowed to do that? I think because they're white. I think because they're white. Yeah. Right. But they were there. And the TSA was like, I ain't fucking with these motherfuckers. Those guys are Dagestani, too. Yeah, but they know, bro.
Starting point is 00:58:31 That's how crazy it is. They knew it, bro. It was absolutely nuts. Remember UFC 294? Seven of them fought? Seven victories. Bro. Oh, wow.
Starting point is 00:58:41 Yeah, yeah. But they were in the homeland. They got charged up for their powers. But do we know what happened to the Jews from the plane? I heard no one was injured. Really? I just don't know if an actual plane from Tel Aviv landed. Special forces squad people came to...
Starting point is 00:58:55 And why did they land there? Yeah, they didn't think that through, it seems. And how did they know? There's a lot of things going on here that are peculiar. Yeah, who's following flight patterns? That seems suspect. Right? Let's get into the conspiracy. Twist that stash, Mark. What do you think?
Starting point is 00:59:13 Talk to me, Mark. What do you think? Let's get that light going. Maybe that's Dagestan. Maybe there's not that much going on. And there's one WhatsApp group chat. And they're just watching flight patterns? And they're just watching anything that comes in. There's nothing else to watch. Eating bananas with their feet and watching flight patterns. Wrestling bears, eating bananas.
Starting point is 00:59:30 What else do they do over there? The only videos I see from Dagestan is them swimming in the cold water and then wrestling a bear. So it's not crazy. So if they hear a Jew's coming to town. Yeah, and they're going there to refuel. Bro. So what is the headline? You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:59:42 Oh. Oh. What is the headline? I'm not going to? Oh. Oh. What is the headline? I'm not going to say it. I'm not going to say it, dude. I'm not crazy in this time. I think what Mark is trying to imply that they were gassing up the Jews in Dagestan. Whoa, dude.
Starting point is 00:59:58 I think that's what he's trying to imply. You're too far, bro. I'm just saying it seems like that's what you were trying to imply. I think they heard it and they tried to pile on. Oh. That was a miscommunication from the say. I think they heard it and they tried to pile on. Oh. That was a miscommunication from the newspaper, I think. Oh, my Lord. I'm not positive exactly what happened.
Starting point is 01:00:10 Well, that should not happen. You should stop doing that. I agree. They should stop doing that immediately. I think we could push back against that. I think we have unilateral support. Yeah. Unilateral.
Starting point is 01:00:19 Nice. Did I use that word right? I think so. I'm 40, bro. I'm 40. I got vocabulary. You know I think so. I'm 40, bro. I'm 40. I got vocabulary, you know what I mean? I'm 40, bro. I'm Uncle Schultz, man.
Starting point is 01:00:32 I'm Uncle Schultz. I'm 40, bro. Yo, people, this is what 40 is. This is 40, bro. This is what y'all got to look forward to. If you're lucky, this is what you get. Remember when you told the Congresswoman where we were going later that night? Oh, yeah. The Congresswoman came to were going later that night? Oh, yeah. Where?
Starting point is 01:00:45 The Congresswoman came to the dinner. Yeah. And I told her, I was like, yeah, if you guys want to come later, we're going to go to room 40. And she was like, what's that? I was like, room for these nuts. What's up with that chicken parm? Y'all want to share some of that chicken parm? Bro, absolute haymaker landed.
Starting point is 01:01:03 A member of the government, bro. It is what it is. I told her she got to get Bill Maher with that. Yeah. She's going off on that whole side of the table ticket. Oh, they would die. Charlotte was laughing. The second I said room 40, Charlotte just go.
Starting point is 01:01:15 He was falling apart. Bro, it's so funny that he just can't get it down. Like every time he attempts it, it's so funny. It is the best. It is the best. And he has so much fun with it, too. Yeah,. It is the best. It is the best. And he has so much fun with it, too. Yeah. Yeah, we're just children
Starting point is 01:01:28 at the end of the day. Shout out to Charlotte. He's on, what is it, Daily Show? Daily Show. Yo, Charlotte's on Daily Show this week. Make sure you check out Charlotte Mayne on Daily Show
Starting point is 01:01:35 this week, man. The fucking legend is doing it. So go check that out. All right, guys, we're going to take a break for a second. You already know what time it is. You see the lights. It's Bluetooth time.
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Starting point is 01:02:14 Yeah, train cars. Train cars with the most train cars in it, okay? She's going to be chasing that dick for the rest of your life, but you start it at the top. Don't build your way up. Start at the top and then slowly fall off. That is the game, and I wish you all success with it. You know what? You're going to get your first month free with Blue Chew. BlueChew.com. Use the promo code flagrants. All you got to do is spend $5 on shipping. $5 on shipping, and you get the first
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Starting point is 01:04:09 Now let's get back to the show. We are back. What else we got? What else we got? What is this? Oh, this is my costume. I have another costume. What is it?
Starting point is 01:04:19 Obviously, I'm a gardener. This is for gardening. What is that for? That's a hoe, right? This is... Well, this is a... It's a gardener. This is for gardening. What is that for? That's a hoe, right? This is, well, this is a, it's a smaller hoe. It's a little hoe. A little hoe. This is a little hoe.
Starting point is 01:04:32 A little hoe. Yeah, it's a little major hoe. And then this right here is a shovel. It's a hand shovel. And this is, you scratch the earth, and then this is, you shovel it up. That's how you garden. Nice. A little chickadee dickadee. Why's how you go hard. Nice. A little chickity dickity.
Starting point is 01:04:47 Why do you need three costumes? Yeah. I don't know. It's just Halloween. I'm celebrating. Being festive. Okay. I'm a festive guy.
Starting point is 01:04:55 Do they have anything to do with each other? I don't even know what you're talking about, dude. Mark, I have no clue what you're talking about. I don't even know what you're trying to suggest.
Starting point is 01:05:03 There would be a link between all three of them. Me neither, dude. I'll be honest. I'm trying to figure it out talking about. I don't even know what you're trying to suggest. There would be a link between all three of them. Me neither. Don't be honest. I'm trying to figure it out right now. Can I take a guess? I mean, you can guess. Okay, I got it.
Starting point is 01:05:10 I got it. Okay, go. Gardner. Gardner's deal with roses. Roses have thorns. Okay. Thorn. Sponge Bob.
Starting point is 01:05:21 Bob Thorn. Billy Bob Thorn. Billy Bob Thornton. Billy Bob Thornton. Whoa. Billy Bob Thorn. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa Thorne. Billy Bob Thorne. Billy Bob Thorne. Billy Bob Thorne. Whoa. Billy Bob Thorne. Whoa. Is that what you are?
Starting point is 01:05:30 Whoa. No, but that's one of those things where it's like you added meaning afterwards, and that meaning is fire. But no, that's not what it is, dude. I don't even know what you're talking about. That's what it was, bro. That was fire. I don't know why. What are you talking about? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:05:40 That's what I'm assuming. I'm assuming there's a game with this. You think that the three costumes mean something together? Yes. I don't even know why you would go there with that. Probably reading way too much into this. Maybe he was just doing a little gardening. Exactly.
Starting point is 01:05:56 Between the break. You garden? Yeah, maybe. I think in the future I'd like to garden. What's on your gloves? What the hell happened, bro? Well, you know, gardening's a contact sport, dude. Dress like O garden? What's on your gloves? What the hell happened, bro? Well, you know, gardening's a contact sport. Dress like OJ?
Starting point is 01:06:09 I think that might be the situation right here. No, no, it gets a little wild out there. Oh, wow. Yeah. You need protection for your hands, especially when you're gardening. Respect. Anyway, I don't know why you guys don't do more costumes. You should take advantage of it, you know? I mean, yeah. You got it.
Starting point is 01:06:25 I'm like the before. He's after. We got one! Act it out, Bala! You guys are couples costumes. Okay. Listen, what do we got? Do we got some feelings?
Starting point is 01:06:34 No facts? No, no, no, no, no. We got Francis Ngannou and Tyson Fury. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Unbelievable. Shockingly an amazing fight. Amazing fight.
Starting point is 01:06:42 High-level boxing. Shout-out to Francis. Unbelievable. I mean Francis What this guy did Let's go honest assessment of the scoring What did you think it was Just honest assessment I said in the group chat I thought it was 5-5
Starting point is 01:06:57 And then with the knockdown I had it 6-4 Tyson And then with the knockdown I had him winning by one point. Okay. Sorry. Who winning by one point? Tyson winning by one point.
Starting point is 01:07:10 He won 6-4, and then he's a 10-8 because of the knockdown. Yeah. So I had him winning by one point. But I would have been mad at it the other way. I think that's kind of how I had it. So it's like, I think I had Tyson winning. But because Francis was coming from such a deficit, the fact that he closed that gap is the victory. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:07:30 I don't know if the decision is awful when you really think about it because people were a little bit – there wasn't unanimous support for one decision. There are people that thought Tyson won narrowly, and there are people that thought Francis won narrowly, and that's exactly what the scorecard showed. Yeah. Right? The judge who had it so far apart. That was kind of and that's exactly what the scorecard showed, right? But- The judge who had it like- That was kind of crazy. There was one that had it far, right?
Starting point is 01:07:49 Yeah. For Tyson, right? What the fuck was he watching? It was like 96, 93 or something like that. Yeah, 97, 93, some crazy show. Yeah, there's no way. How's that even possible with a 10? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:07:57 I don't even know. But Francis, I think the most impressive thing with Francis was the IQ. Like his boxing IQ was insane. Yeah. thing with Francis was the IQ. His boxing IQ was insane. He knew what Tyson was doing, and he had a plan of attack to mitigate it. And then after he did it, he was countering it. So that knockdown that he got, Tyson has his great foot movement, great head movement, strong jab, but his main attack is a one-two. He does a lot of pump fakes to get you off your rhythm, and then he sets you up, and then one-two.
Starting point is 01:08:27 Sometimes they'll come in with the hook. Francis was waiting for the one-two, and then trying to counter with that big hook. Landed it, dropped him. And an interesting thing happened. Francis realized that Tyson couldn't hurt him. He could walk through anything Tyson could throw. Keep in mind, this is who I think is the greatest heavyweight of all time. I've said on this podcast, Tyson Fury is the greatest heavyweight of all time. I've said it on this podcast.
Starting point is 01:08:46 Tyson Fury is the greatest heavyweight of all time. So Francis went up against the greatest heavyweight of all time and almost beat him. And if there's a rematch, if Francis knows he can't get hurt, he was walking
Starting point is 01:09:02 through punches, walking through elbows. Yeah, that elbow was crazy. Go like this, go like this. You got a little boogie. Damn, bro. I tried to tell you before the break. Can you just look at your phone? Oh, gosh.
Starting point is 01:09:12 You got it. Done. There. So it's like he's throwing serious shit, and Francis is walking through it. And then Tyson knows he cannot walk through Francis' shit. Yeah. He got got. And once that dynamic happens in a fight,
Starting point is 01:09:25 now it's up to Tyson to really outbox him. You gotta move back, you gotta stick that jab, and you gotta score points. You know you can't knock him down. That's what I thought he did, he just scored points. But think about that. He's going in there going, I'm gonna teach this guy a lesson, I'm gonna spark him. He literally says when he starts the first round, he goes, welcome to class. And then when Francis knocks him down, he goes, what happened, professor? I mean, amazing. And there was a moment, I think, where Francis starts to realize, oh, shit, this isn't as hard as I thought it was going to be.
Starting point is 01:09:53 I'm going to be all right. Now, to be fair, Tyson came in sloppy. It looks like he barely even had a camp. He had no strategy whatsoever. I don't even think he took the thing seriously. No. No, it's not worth making the, what's it called, creating the caveat for him, of course. And also, you're getting paid so much money from Saudi Arabia.
Starting point is 01:10:12 They're probably overpaying so much to hold the fight there. You show up in shape. You show up ready, and you put on a fucking show. If I'm Saudi Arabia, I mean, you had this amazing fight, but I'm also like, hey, dude, I don't care if you don't respect your opponent. I'm paying you crazy. You respect the pay I'm giving you.
Starting point is 01:10:32 You respect the payday. Because you're not just doing a pay-per-view. They're overpaying, so the fight is there. So it's like... The amount of money they must have paid. You know they flew all those celebrities out there. I don't think a single celebrity paid to be... They had all these champions waiting in the hallway
Starting point is 01:10:49 just to give a dap to Tyson on his way to the ring. Did you see that? No, I didn't notice that. The amount of people was insane. It was like Mike Tyson. You know how Vander Holyfield can't afford his own ticket out of Dubai? They're like Tyson, Conor McGregor,
Starting point is 01:11:03 Cristiano Ronaldo. Yeah. Everybody. Just those three. Oscar de la Hoya, Larry Holmes. I don't think we've seen that since Mike Tyson. Whereas every fighter came out. Marco Antonio.
Starting point is 01:11:14 They had every champion in the last 40 years there. From all these different weight divisions. It was unbelievable. I mean, they must have lost in crazy money doing it. But imagine what did they really win? Yeah. Like now we're looking at this as a destination. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:29 Even the show that they put on. Like, I don't give a fuck for music before sporting events. But I'm looking. I'm like, this is a hell of a fucking show. Like these people are out here. I think the perception of Saudi Arabia from the West is sand, oil. Yeah. Black cube.
Starting point is 01:11:46 That's it. Now, I think through the whatever, sports washing and these other things they're doing, I think, and then they're building these nice hotels and stuff. I think we're starting to go, oh, is this another version of Dubai? Is this another version of the Emirates? Oh, wow. And they got enough money to fly every single person out there. Oh, they got some bougie shit going on here and entertainment that I'd be into. Sports washing Oh, wow. And they got enough money to fly every single person out there. Oh, they got some bougie shit going
Starting point is 01:12:05 on here and entertainment that I'd be into. Sports washing works, yo. Nobody's giving them credit for a brilliant idea, really. Great marketing. Every state in America want a sports team. That's true. They're trying to wash their state. I always thought Kansas City was just like booming Metroplex
Starting point is 01:12:21 because I grew up watching football. Then I go there. I'm like, it's a country ass town. But the football team, they sports watched it into me thinking. That's what North Korea needs, bro. They need. Chernobyl. Yes. Chernobyl needs a football team or something.
Starting point is 01:12:33 Bro. You can just rebrand. Chernobyl isotopes, bro. Imagine, dude. Yeah, but it's awesome. So, yeah. So it was just, I mean, the winner in this fight is, like, I think they need to fight again. And Tyson needs to prove that he wasn't prepared for it.
Starting point is 01:12:46 And he needs to dominate him. Because it's a little bit of a knock on his legacy. I was going to ask you, do you still think he's the greatest heavyweight of all time? I think he's the greatest of all time. But it is a knock on his legacy. And what I would rather do is give Francis credit for his greatness than take away Tyson's. Because if I go, he was never that good, that's an insult to Francis. I'd rather go, this is the greatest guy, and it just so happens this Francis Ngannou guy
Starting point is 01:13:09 that absolutely dominated the UFC is so fucking talented that he could dominate in boxing too. You know what I mean? Like if we cut the- Impressive though, your first boxing- It was the same, it was the same. Your first boxing matches against the greatest boxer in history. Yeah, I imagine. And you potentially outbox him.
Starting point is 01:13:28 You knock him down once, but it's not like he's just going and throwing haymakers. He made Tyson afraid to throw. Tyson's the greatest boxer of all time. He's not just a guy like Deontay Wilder who's got the nuclear fucking punch. He sits you down, it's over. He will outbox anybody. And you were right in front of him, and he was afraid to throw.
Starting point is 01:13:49 Now, in fairness to Francis, wasn't he a boxer before UFC? I mean, like, in the way that you learn boxing as one of the disciplines before you get into MMA. He had a little background in it. He has the background that I have. It's like LeBron played football in high school. Yeah. And then you just go become a basketball player.
Starting point is 01:14:05 Right. And to that end, I don't know how you can, and I love both of them, but I don't know how you can not take some credit away from Tyson. Because if Tom Brady, the greatest football player of all time, played LeBron one-on-one and lost 11-9, I'd be like, yeah, I'm judging LeBron a little bit. Like, that shouldn't happen. I don't care how good Tom Brady is at basketball. I'm judging you
Starting point is 01:14:25 100 100 and i think that we try to justify it by going oh tom wasn't taking it that seriously lebron went to yeah sorry sorry lebron wasn't taking it that seriously where in this circumstance i'm like this ain't this boxing it ain't basketball like you got to take this you're getting punched in the head you got to fuck out yeah so it's like i know you were taking it seriously because you got dropped. Yeah. Yeah, I guess in my brain, the prep you didn't take seriously. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So that's where you come in sloppy.
Starting point is 01:14:51 Sure, but at the same time, it's like you've been preparing since you were five years old. Like Tyson doing 12 rounds, he can do with no training camp. He's been boxing so long. Yeah, you definitely give credit to Francis for sure.
Starting point is 01:15:02 I just think you also have to. To me, it's like I can't not look at – I can't look at Tyson as the greatest right now. If they run him back and then he admits no problem, then it's like, all right, fine, this is all forgotten. But right now, I'm looking at Francis, super impressed. But I am also looking at Tyson like, eh, really? Greatest heavyweight of all time? That's what my friend who knows boxing always says. But I'm looking at it as a guy who doesn't watch a ton of me. I'm like, I don't know, man.
Starting point is 01:15:25 That seems crazy. I mean, there's only one person that I think could potentially beat him that has a chance, and it's Lennox Lewis, because you need someone with the size. I mean, Tyson's 5'9". Mike Tyson at 5'10". Sorry, Tyson is 6'9". Mike Tyson at 5'10". He can't.
Starting point is 01:15:43 The arms won't even reach. It just can't. The arms won't even reach. He just can't. It's too much. 6'9", can move, jab, throw punches, balance amazing. What do you think of Francis doing other boxing matches? I mean, go for the money. You have to, right? What I want is the UFC to re-sign him and then give him the bag.
Starting point is 01:16:00 Kind of need to. And then just be like, and I want him, no, no, and give him the bag. Give him, the problem is they're not going to give him the bag and the freedom because then they'll have to do that with all the other fighters. But I want him to go back and get the bag and because then the UFC has the baddest man on the planet.
Starting point is 01:16:15 The baddest man on the planet we know right now is named Francis Ngannou. And that's no knock on Jon Jones, but Jon Jones just tore his pec, he's out of the fight. I'm also looking at this like, if I'm Jon Jones, but Jon Jones just tore his pec, he's out of the fight. I'm also looking at this like if I'm Jon Jones, I don't wanna fight Stipe. If I wanna go down as the baddest man ever, which that's what everybody thought Jon Jones was before this fight, I gotta fight that Francis Ngannou dude.
Starting point is 01:16:38 And let me tell you something, if Francis Ngannou can maintain distance between 6'9 Tyson Fury and himself. I don't care who anybody else is. You are not taking it lightly coming in for a shot on Francis. Will Jon Jones out wrestle him? Sure, his discipline is better. But did you see the way that Francis was throwing Tyson Fury around the ring in the clench? Tyson never felt that in his life. Every boxing match, Tyson never.
Starting point is 01:17:12 He looked a little surprised. He was like, what the fuck? Anytime they clinch him, usually what Tyson can do in a clinch, he's so big and so strong, he can just be imposing and lay on the guy. And put a lot of, fucking Francis was yanking him up, throwing him around, doing whatever he wanted. Yeah. And shout out to Francis conditioning. Oh, phenomenal.
Starting point is 01:17:29 I thought he was winded earlier. Phenomenal. Yo, he was still fighting. Came back. Yeah, I thought by like the fifth round, I was like, okay, I think Tyson got it now. He's going to win every round. And then it was like the eighth round where Francis was like just going. And I was like, wow, this I did not expect.
Starting point is 01:17:42 Yeah. What about Deontay Wilder, Francis? I think it'd be an amazing fight. Everybody would watch it. Francis injects interest and excitement into the heavyweight division. Tyson had dominated so much that people stopped caring. And now every fighter, Anthony Joshua vs. Francis Ngannou would be huge. I would love to see that.
Starting point is 01:18:01 Do you think that matchup would be more equal in a way, like Deontay and Francis just because of power? Yeah, but here's the thing. If Francis boxes as well, here's the thing. If Tyson couldn't hurt Francis, Deontay is going to test that chip. That's where I'm like, while those knockouts are so savage, I'm like, that's hard to watch. And Tyson landed. That's my point. Tyson is a better boxer, but Deontay might be a harder opponent.
Starting point is 01:18:28 That's the thing, and you're 100% right there. Because Tyson did land, Francis could walk through it. And that's a problem. I don't think you can walk through Deontay. I don't think there's a human on this planet that can walk through Deontay. So Tyson might be a better fight for Francis. Right. Anthony Joshua has a lot of pop. Maybe that's a better fight for Francis. Right. Anthony Joshua has a lot of pop.
Starting point is 01:18:46 Maybe that's a tougher fight. But this specific one, where it was a guy whose power wasn't so dominant that he can't walk through it, and his power is really effective, it might have been the perfect one. But he's still in jet. He has one more massive boxing fight, if you want.
Starting point is 01:19:01 He has two more. He has a rematch with Tyson whenever you want, and we're all buying that in a fucking heartbeat. If I'm him, I actually wait for that. I go, fuck the... I tell Tyson to say, fuck the Usyk fight. Hold off on the Usyk fight. Let's do another fight for your belt.
Starting point is 01:19:18 Yeah. That's the fight I want to see. That is the fight I want to see. I want to see that rematch. That's what we all want to see. I would love to see him to see. I want to see that rematch. Yeah. Because that's what we all want to see. I would love to see him fight Joshua, too. Joshua. Deontay Wilder, I think, would be the biggest money fight
Starting point is 01:19:30 because... I worry for Francis. Power versus power. It's power, and they're going to land, and Deontay's going to throw. God damn. And it's going to be mayhem.
Starting point is 01:19:41 It's going to be absolute mayhem. Yeah. But yeah, like heavyweight boxing, to be this excitedhem. But yeah, heavyweight boxing, to be this excited. If those two went against each other, who are you putting your money on? Francis or Deontay? I'd say Wilder. Just based off of, in terms of winning,
Starting point is 01:19:54 probably Deontay. I think, yeah. After what I saw from Francis, I think I'd go Francis. Dude, it's hard. He was boxing. He was boxing, and he was defending, and he saw the things coming. Also, Tyson is way more difficult to prepare for than Deontay Deontay. You're watching one hand the whole fight Tyson you gotta watch everything movement faints the whole thing So with a guy whose IQ is as impressive as Francis's maybe he'll develop a game plan where he can
Starting point is 01:20:20 You know handle that power and also that's the thing with Francis. It's like he's felt, I'm not saying MMA guys, MMA punchers punch as hard as boxers. Clearly, they don't. But he's had four-ounce gloves hit him in the face as hard as possible. Guys who have boxing backgrounds, like Stipe, I think, was a Golden Gloves, he's boxed. And he walked through it. Once you walk through four ounces, you put them pillows on your hands. It's crazy.
Starting point is 01:20:49 I thought the fight was going to have four ounce gloves. That's what they initially were saying. And when that didn't happen, I was like, well, this isn't even going to be fun. But if there's four ounce gloves, Francis wins that fight in the third round. It's over. Hits him in the side of the head with four ounce gloves, it's over. Tyson's out. Oh, God. Hits him in the side of the head with four ounce gloves, it's over.
Starting point is 01:21:05 Tyson's out. Most shocking result any of us ever saw. And to be honest, I think he won the fight. When that happened, I think we're all like, oh, he won. Whatever happened.
Starting point is 01:21:13 He doesn't have to win to win. Oh, yeah. And that's the beauty of, I think MMA has injected that into us, where it's just like, sometimes you can win through losing
Starting point is 01:21:21 or tying. You know, it's... Prince is just an insane human also. What a fucking story. I mean, unbelievable. This is kind of a sad thought, but I was like, man, are there other Francis's
Starting point is 01:21:31 that just couldn't make it here? Couldn't make it to the thing? Like, you are the GOAT. There are these... And we like to think most of them make it through, but maybe not, because Francis overcame
Starting point is 01:21:41 everything to get here, and he might be the greatest fighter period of all time. Maybe. Bro. I don't know fighting, but if you can box like that, do UFC like that get here and he might be the greatest fighter, period, of all time. Maybe. Bro. I don't know fighting, but if you can box like that, do UFC like that, like, he might be the greatest fighter ever, period. Yeah. So there's probably other Francis, just
Starting point is 01:21:54 we never saw. They're working on a movie right now. They must, right? I mean. Fuck a movie. I want a video game, bro. I want to play his life on Xbox. Like, literally, you start as a kid, fucking do the mining shit. Get on a boat make to america fight a little bit the last of us and this is my family he's last of us but real life i think with francis as long as it's not a hypothetical but him fucking
Starting point is 01:22:13 that's the only thing i don't i really like francis you're like yo you have to fuck francis bro i get it i get it that's it all right So listen, while we talk about some sports, it's time to get them prize picks and them Akash locks. I actually heard the Akash locks came through. Yo, I won last week. And then this week I did it. This is what's cool about prize picks. I did a six leg pick. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:22:37 During the second half. You can do second half picks. So I did six legs while I was live streaming the Cowboy game. And I only got four of them. Still made money. Price picks still paid me, even though two missed, which nobody else would do that. Normally, you pick mad shit, you lose. And that's it.
Starting point is 01:22:52 That's it. You're done. I'm going to hit you with some NBA picks right now. Okay, let me hear it. They got Yusuf Nurkic. He plays for Phoenix. Seven and a half rebounds. I got him doing more.
Starting point is 01:23:00 Okay. I think he can get more rebounds than that. And then Donovan Mitchell, five rebounds against the Knicks. Because it's the Knicks, I think there's going to be a lot of missed shots. I'm going to go more there also. So I'm doing more and more on this one. Let me know how it works out for you. Prize picks.
Starting point is 01:23:14 Also use the promo code SHULTS. You'll get your initial deposit matched up to $100. That's right. If you put in $100, you get $100 for free. So you might as well just do it. Respect. Shout out prize picks, man. All right.
Starting point is 01:23:24 Let's do some feels zone facts, Mark. Okay. What's the prize pick on a former NBA player, Joe Smith? Bro, legendary promo for OnlyFans. Yeah. Legendary. So I think his wife has been a porn star and she
Starting point is 01:23:39 goes, you know, my husband found out that I have an OnlyFans and he's upset and then he's in the background getting all upset. But it is a great way to, excuse me, promote her OnlyFans. I'm so fucking gullible. You fell for it. Yeah, I did. Did you look it up? Nah, I didn't. But she said she used to do porn and she
Starting point is 01:23:56 hasn't since they've been married. It really just looks like they're having money issues and she's like, yeah, I gotta do what I gotta do. Yeah, how much did he make in the NBA? That's how I wanted to see his career. That's the crazy thing. I think he made good money. This is the most disrespectful thing about this article I'm reading.
Starting point is 01:24:10 Literally, the opening line, Joe Smith, comma, who made $61 million during his time in the NBA was limited. In the 90s, bro. In the 90s and early 2000s, $61 million in today's dollars is like $200 million probably. Yeah, but if you live in that life, you could go through that. You gotta have a gambling addiction. Yeah, I mean, you gotta try to spend $200 million probably. Yeah, but if you live in that life, you could go through that. You got to have a gambling addiction. Yeah, I mean, like you got to try to spend $61 million. You could do it, but it takes work.
Starting point is 01:24:31 Like gambling or like vacations, like spending $61 million and having no assets left is fucking hard to do without gambling. And again, $61 million then is like probably like $200 million now. Even if you buy a car, even if it's half the value, you still get half back. You know what I mean? You have 31 million. Exactly. If you bought 61 million cars, you have $31 million. Maybe he's a Bitcoin speculator.
Starting point is 01:24:53 Have you looked into that? Have you seen his portfolio? No, I'm just looking at his Bitcoin speculation. Are you guys in the same group chat? You might have like a little WhatsApp. I'm thinking about starting OnlyFans, actually. Get my titties out there. I mean, it is crazy, though.
Starting point is 01:25:01 on an OnlyFans, actually. Yeah, my titties out there. I mean, it is crazy, though. But, like, if he didn't know, there's no way that this guy's going years without knowing what his wife is doing, right? No, they know it's all fucking put together 100%. Yeah, at first, my thought was, I didn't watch the video,
Starting point is 01:25:15 but I was like, oh, there's no, yeah, this is crazy, his wife, blah, blah, blah. And then I was like, oh, they probably are in on this together. Because it's just, like, him reacting in the background and you putting that online. It's just like, I don't know. It all seems too. Great promo. I want to see how well it's doing. Matter of fact, we should check
Starting point is 01:25:30 in on it. All right, what else we got? What do you think about this Kai Sinet jail stream? Have you seen clips from it? So I've never watched like a stream live, but I don't know. I'm probably like most people. I've watched tons of clips from it. Like, it's amazing. Like, God bless the people that are clipping out these streams. Yeah. Because they of clips from it. It's amazing. God bless the people that are clipping out these streams.
Starting point is 01:25:45 Because they have to watch it. And they have to watch it and edit it down to the fun shit for us to enjoy. And I think Kai has been really transformative with the streaming, where he creates games out of it. And I've seen certain people travel and certain people do these things, and then everybody kind of repeats the same thing. It's like, I'm going to go to Japan. It's like, okay like okay well now i'll go to japan and then everybody goes to japan and then blah blah blah and it's like no real nothing really unique but like at least this scenario he's creating is truly unique within the streaming space he's creating a game out of it yes and uh this guy Yes. And he's reaping the rewards. It's a really smart way of going about content.
Starting point is 01:26:28 But freak out, man. Hold your head, bro. Hold it down, bro. So what's the deal? Is this a set or did they rent out an old jail? I think they got an old prison. Oh, that's what it is? It looks like an old prison or they got a movie set that was used. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 01:26:41 that was used. You know what I mean? I'm sure LA has a prison set that is built in the exact same structures or whatever, like a prison to shoot all their shows. Where was Oz shot? Where was Shawshank shot? But it's great.
Starting point is 01:26:57 And then injecting all of the different famous people as well into it. Bro, he makes prison look way too fun though. That's the problem. That's kind of what prison is, bro. I think that's what it is. Dude, I talked to a guy on my pod a week ago that said, if I could get laid in prison, I'd be there for the rest of my life.
Starting point is 01:27:16 Quote, verbatim. He's like, everything's awesome. You hang with your boys. Low security. It's just like playing cards all day. It's like the only thing is female contact. It's the only thing you miss. There's just like playing cards all day. It's like the only thing is female contact. It's the only thing you miss. There's no responsibility. Completely
Starting point is 01:27:28 remove the anxiety of personal accountability. I think if you gave them female contact, things would be way more relaxed. Maybe. A lot less violence in the prison. You gotta milk them. Maybe just milk them. Yeah. You like line them up. You line them up. Assembly line. Exactly. AI, I'm down for that usage
Starting point is 01:27:44 of AI. Just fucking hand jobs for prisoners. Just drain them up. But then what do you do with all of it? Like all the samples. That's actually a good point because you don't want to put it back out there in the world because then you're just making more felons. So, yeah, what do you do with it? Protein shakes or something? I guess you could.
Starting point is 01:28:03 I guess you could put it back on a diet. Maybe you can feed it to pigs or something like that. Don't they eat like weird stuff? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I bet you put it in the soil. You can grow a motherfucking beanstalk. You know the porns where it's like crazy loads of cum and shit like that? You know, repurpose it.
Starting point is 01:28:17 Oh, use it as like a prop cum. It could be prop cum. Or an OnlyFans thing. Yeah, yeah. That actually would be kind of funny. I like it, man. I like it. What's the feedback been with it? Positive? Have there been haters?
Starting point is 01:28:31 I mean, always. Some people saying this is, you know, the Stanford prison experiments, they're like, this could go that way, whatever, this glorifies negative stereotypes, blah, blah, blah, but the guy's making content. He's not trying to change the world. Yeah. Yeah, that's an unfair expectation. Yeah. Yeah, you see an unfair expectation. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:28:45 Yeah. Yeah, you see DeSantis get dragged for wearing lifts? Bro, this picture is so funny. DeSantis 2024. Yeah, I was just going to say. Can I say something, Al? What were you wearing yesterday? Because you were 6'4 yesterday.
Starting point is 01:28:58 No, same. Just this. Stop it, bro. I was just standing up straight because I had a tight shirt on, so I can't slouch. I usually slouch. Al? But if I have a tight shirt on, I stand up straight. You were 6'4". Swear to God, it was these same exact shoes.
Starting point is 01:29:10 You must have had something in them as well. No, I swear to God. Al, you were 6'4". I was just standing up straight. No. Like, that's it. Damn, bro. Damn.
Starting point is 01:29:18 Damn, bro. That was a little crazy, bro. I feel like I'm tapping into something right now. That's it. If I stand up straight, it gives me something right now. That's it. If I stand up straight, it gives me an extra inch. I don't think... Come on. He's just trying to get the Texas... No, there's another one that's more incriminating.
Starting point is 01:29:33 Where they draw it out? It's a different... He's sitting down... That one. It's a little dark, though. That's the only thing. It's a little sketchy, bro. Yeah, you need it to be lighter, but it is bad.
Starting point is 01:29:50 Uh-uh. It's a little sketchy. There's a diagram right here. Let that man live, bro. Is that false advertising? What do you think? I mean... Have you seen him walk?
Starting point is 01:29:58 They're politicians. He walks onto the Bill Maher show, and it's very interesting. No. It's a little wobbly. Let me see. All right, I'm going to pull it up. I mean, he was a fighter pilot, right? I think that's what he did.
Starting point is 01:30:10 No, I think he did Guantanamo stuff. I would look into seeing that. I thought he was a fighter pilot. Lost my vote. It can get rough for me. Hold on. Because if he's a fighter pilot, he's short. Why? They're all short?
Starting point is 01:30:23 You have to be to fit in the cockpit. It's a small thing. Oh, so you calling Tom Cruise short, bro? Yo, son. Don't disrespect my God. Just say it. You said it. Peace be upon him. Peace be upon Maverick, bro. All due respect.
Starting point is 01:30:39 This is a little suspect, dude. Can we get a... I didn't see nothing weird with that dude. Can we get a... I didn't see nothing weird with that one. Can we get the hue or the brightness? Yeah, I don't know why it got so dark all of a sudden, bro. Come on, man. We got to fix that. They're not holding strong in that hairline, bro.
Starting point is 01:30:58 That hairline hasn't budged. Did he pivot right? I think he's more central. My long, distant view or whatever,, I think he's more central. My long, like distant view or whatever. It seemed like he always hated religion, but liberals thought he was only talking about white religions. And they were like,
Starting point is 01:31:14 yeah, that's our guy. And then he was like, no, all religions. I don't like Islam either. Then liberals were like, well,
Starting point is 01:31:19 fuck you. You're a hate monger. You're not who I thought you were. And then I asked a liberal about that. And he was like, well, I just don't think you should punch it down, which I thought was And then I asked a liberal about that and he was like, well, I just don't think you should punch it down, which I thought was the most racist
Starting point is 01:31:27 thing you could possibly say. Which is like, well, the Muslims are beneath us. You can't hit them. I thought back in the day he used to be like far left. He was like super liberal. Back in the day that was like, I smoke weed and it should be legalized. Being gay is okay. That should be legalized. They should get married.
Starting point is 01:31:44 And Christianity is dumb. That was like, you're a liberal. And now being left has shifted more into the gender politics. And I think that he's rejecting gender politics and then like wokeism. So like you can't make offensive jokes or we have to be really sensitive about everything. And I think that shift he's pushed back on. There's like a, it's really funny when we were in the netherlands i think we spoke about this on the pod but like the netherlands they don't have any like uh religion
Starting point is 01:32:13 doesn't play any role in the laws that they create right we spoke about this right yeah and um and because of that they can choose the lesser of two evils, right? Like they can decide both of these things are wrong, but we'll choose this lesser wrong thing. For example, making prostitution legal because that stops human sex trafficking. So like this will be wrong, but it's less wrong than this other thing. And then we'll create laws around it. And they're really struggling right now when it comes to woke shit and gender identity politics. They were the most progressive. They were like, back in the day, there's this massive gay parade that the whole city comes out for, the whole town, everybody celebrates it. Because in their very literal mind, they're just going,
Starting point is 01:32:58 well, yeah, if you're gay and you like someone else, that's not hurting anybody. There's no net negative on society. Yeah, it's legal. Let's make it legal. That's not hurting anybody. There's no net negative on society. Like, yeah, it's legal. Let's make it legal. That's fine. And there's no God telling me that this is wrong. So I'm just going off of the Carfax. And the Carfax is, this doesn't hurt anybody. Everything's fine. And now they're grappling with 70 different genders.
Starting point is 01:33:17 And they're like, but this doesn't make sense. So they've went from the most progressive to seemingly conservative about certain issues. But they were never progressive. They were just mathematical. Just practical. Yes. You know what I mean? It was just- Pure logic.
Starting point is 01:33:37 It was pure logic and they didn't have a religious influence on the laws. So I think they're having a little identity crisis. Cuz they're like, wait, I thought we were the progressives and we're so forward thinking and we're the most profound and advanced culture in Europe. And now we're getting
Starting point is 01:33:51 to look at it as bigots because we don't believe in 70 different genders. It's kind of interesting how gender politics can expose what the real motivation for your laws is. And theirs was never let's accept everybody.
Starting point is 01:34:08 Theirs were like, this makes logical sense. Yeah. I still like that better. I think, and I think that's probably where most people are with it, if I'm being honest. Like, I think most of us are like, yeah, if you're not hurting anybody else. Yeah, do your thing. Do your thing. And as long as it's logical. it makes complete sense that some people are
Starting point is 01:34:27 attracted to the same sex like that's not a thing to me but when i've taught my whole life there's only two genders and now three okay cool when you get to i think there's like 108 is the most recent list i looked at it's like well now i'm not i'm a little confused yeah it still ain't hurting nobody do you think if you want to be an octopus, be an octopus. Yes, until you get into the reassignment surgery when they're younger, and that's where things start to kind of spiral. Like putting them on puberty blockers or hormone blockers. And I think that's where people can potentially get hurt. And I think that's where if you're a very literal state like the Netherlands, you're going, OK, I think this could potentially hurt somebody. So we have to legislate around it.
Starting point is 01:35:11 It also seems like parents are just afraid of like the social contagion. Like, is this something that my kid would want to be interested in? Yeah. Even if they're not. Yeah. I don't know if that fear is founded. I don't know if there is like a social contagion. So they're worried about them doing shit to their genitals when they're young, but they can snip their dick off when they're a baby and they don't care.
Starting point is 01:35:31 They don't get a say in that. Now we're talking. See? Now we're talking. Oh, but I agree with you. Yeah. I think we should stop. Snip, snip.
Starting point is 01:35:38 Snip, snip. I think that that's a, I think there's a very compelling argument for that. And you can get yours restored. There's a, there's fore very compelling argument for that. And you can get yours restored. There's foreskin restoration surgeries. Word? Yep. Can you pick the color? Yep.
Starting point is 01:35:52 Yeah, yeah, yeah. What, you want two-tone? Yeah, he might have a little frost time. You go ice the tips? Yeah, why not? Did you see that episode of How To with John Wilson? No. At the end of one of the episodes, the episode ends with him
Starting point is 01:36:05 talking to a guy who is big on getting your foreskin back and lengthening it. And he sells this product where you can clip it onto your foreskin and it puts weight on it. So it brings it back down. And then the end of that episode is just nuts jump scare to a man
Starting point is 01:36:20 with a device on his penis that is just insane. It's a great, wild episode. You be watching some shit. You can get it right here, bro. Let's go, dude. You can get it back. Restore your penis. If you're about that life, restore it.
Starting point is 01:36:39 You're just joking all of a sudden? Get the skin back. Stop clipping our boys, dude. Come on, get that shit off the screen. Next topic. Stop clipping our boys, dude. Come on. Get that shit off the screen. All right. Famous streamer, and I believe, I think she's just a streamer. I don't know if she has OnlyFans.
Starting point is 01:36:52 She's a streamer that's basically, her name is Amaranth. She's the one that sold the tub water. You remember this? Vaguely. She took a bath and then started selling the bathtub water by the cup and sold out, made millions of dollars selling bathtub water. She just created a beverage, a beer made out of her vaginal
Starting point is 01:37:09 yeast. I'll try it. Okay, that was too quick. You don't even want to see it? I'd like to see what she looks like. I don't know if you know who you signed up for, dude. Well, let me see it. Yeah, try it. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:37:25 Wait, is that cheating? Eating another girl's pussy? Yeah, I tried. Yeah. Yeah. So apparently- Wait, is that cheating? Eating another girl's pussy? Well, that's not what we said. You're drinking another girl's pussy. Well, drinking a beer with the boys. No, you're sharing the girl's pussy with the boys. Because that is her pussy yeast.
Starting point is 01:37:39 Also, wait, is that- Are women supposed to have that? I thought that was a bad thing. Yeah, it's like an infection if you have yeast. I think you have a little. So she has to cook up an infection? Are you supposed to have a little bit, Miles? Yeah, I think you're supposed to have yeast.
Starting point is 01:37:55 Just a regular amount? Yeah, and then when it's infected, that's a yeast infection. But you have it there all the time. But if you have too much yeast, then it's bad. I thought a yeast infection is an infection of yeast. Miles is a pussy expert. How much yeast she got, yo? I don't think a girl should have yeast in her pussy, dude. That's bad. I thought a yeast infection is an infection of yeast. How much yeast she got, yo? I don't think a girl should have
Starting point is 01:38:08 yeast in her pussy, dude. That's disgusting. I think you do. I think they do. I'm about to look it up. But is that cheating? I don't think so. Your vagina naturally contains a balanced mix of yeast, including
Starting point is 01:38:24 candida and bacteria. So why do they want us eating that shit? Right? We don't think so. Your vagina naturally contains a balanced mix of yeast, including candida and bacteria. So why do they want us eating that shit? Right? We don't got no fucking yeast in our dick. It's good for the immune system. I guess. It's good for digestion. Yeah, but put some turmeric in there.
Starting point is 01:38:35 I don't want no fucking yeast and bacteria and whatever else you said, candida. Yeah, but yogurt has that. You eat yogurt. I don't. For that reason? Yeah, that shit is whack. Y'all eat yogurt? Sometimes. Yogurt's good. Yeah, but yogurt has that. You eat yogurt. I don't. For that reason? Yeah, that shit is whack. Y'all eat yogurt? Sometimes.
Starting point is 01:38:49 Yogurt's good. Yogurt's good. I don't do it. Flavor yogurt, fantastic. Also, y'all got to stop eating gogurt, bro. That's how it starts. Yogurt is how it starts. No, I said yogurt.
Starting point is 01:39:00 I said to him, gogurt is such a good thing. I said gogurt. I enjoy gogurt. So you want gogurts with no children? Just do that real quick. Just squeeze a gogurt is sexy. I enjoy gogurt. Gogurts with no children? Just do that real quick. Just squeeze a gogurt in your mouth. How is it gay?
Starting point is 01:39:12 It's not gay. I only eat two at a time. I only eat two gogurts at a time. I just fucking suck them down. Honestly, yogurt in general, bro, that's a big issue. What about a danimal? Danimal's nice. What is that?
Starting point is 01:39:24 Never had a danimal? It's a big issue. That's affecting a lot of... What about a Danimal? Danimal's nice. What is that? Never had a Danimal? It's a delicious yogurt drink. So it's like... No. It's like a yogurt... He really did get out the house. It's like a yogurt, but it's a little more liquidy, and it's in a small, tiny bottle, and it only refills you a little bit.
Starting point is 01:39:36 It's the smallest... That seems so... All I know of is Dan-in and the Kanye and... All these colleges? What are you talking about? Kanye fit this dick in your mouth. and the con you and... What are these colleges? What are you talking about? Can you fit this dick in your mouth? Fuck, dude.
Starting point is 01:39:52 Damn it. Yeah, he's stupid. I almost said what, but you beat me to it. I'm going to give you a go-gurt in your sleep. Don't fall asleep around me. Nah, bro. You better be sucking a go-gurt. I'm telling you, I mean that for real. Yogurt is a real problem with young males.
Starting point is 01:40:06 It's a gateway to gay? It's not gay, but it does feminize you. I think it's really the cause of trans. That's the pipeline? I'm being dead serious, bro. It has a lot of estrogen in it. Is that true? Look up the amount of estrogen
Starting point is 01:40:22 in yogurt. He's like, I'm going think so. Look up the amount of estrogen in yogurt. He's like, I'm going. Do the pass out there. Soy milk and yogurt are excellent foods high in estrogen. Wow. Yeah. I mean, y'all knew it. When you eat it, you don't feel like a man.
Starting point is 01:40:41 That is true. Yogurt is so fucking feminine, bro. That's true. That's why you go do go-ger is less gay. It's turning you into women, bro. What about Greek yogurt? What about it? That's got more protein. I ain't gonna lie,
Starting point is 01:40:53 Greek yogurt is a little bit less estrogen. But that shit that y'all eat is full of estrogen. Even the one that has a little fruit on the bottom? No, that actually cuts away. That shit is fire. It cuts away. That does cut away. If you have fruit on the bottom? No, that actually cuts away. That cuts away. That does cut away. If you have fruit on the bottom,
Starting point is 01:41:09 that takes away most of that. Yeah, a tiny little fang. If you throw some granola in there, you'd be good. Because the granola will soak it up. You gotta add some nuts to it. You gotta put the testosterone. You have to.
Starting point is 01:41:21 Bro, this was the only yogurt my mom bought growing up. For my whole life. You ever...*** me shit? Fat, yeah. I think you might be right, bro. Because I've been drinking this since I was a little kid. Yeah, but she didn't have the 0% milk fat.
Starting point is 01:41:35 We know that for a fact. Wait, what? How are you saying that? How are you saying that, bro? How are you saying it? Is that respectful? No, no, with all due respect. With all due respect.
Starting point is 01:41:47 I almost got fucking pissed off. With all due respect. I almost got fucking livid. There's no way in hell. Yo. Your mom's with all due respect put a total 0% milk fat into the house. But how are you?
Starting point is 01:41:58 I feel like you're saying it in a weird way. No, with all due respect. With all due respect. I just had a bedroom. That was not right. Ain't no way. With all due respect. Ain't no way. I got no problem with that. With all due respect. With all due respect. That was not right. Ain't no way. With all due respect. Ain't no way.
Starting point is 01:42:06 I got no problem with that. With all due respect. I'm just saying, with all due respect. You know what I mean? My mom just became an American citizen with her big, titty, having ass. You saw the comment on your post? No, what is that? The comment goes, the heavies are ours.
Starting point is 01:42:22 That's awesome. That's funny. That's funny you wrote that, Mark. I would never, with all due respect. I would never write that, bro. With all due respect. This is awesome, dude. We need more entrepreneurs, more female entrepreneurs.
Starting point is 01:42:35 And this is a good example of ways you can create products for your audience. We could do something like this. We should. I can't try it, though. That's cheating. I can't deny it. I'm a fucking rider. No, we got to try that.
Starting point is 01:42:48 All right, one more. One more. What y'all think about our boy Dwight Howard? Free him, bro. Free Dwight. He didn't do nothing wrong. Love who you love, dog. Free Dwight.
Starting point is 01:42:58 Yo, did y'all see Mace's reaction? Yes. Shout out to Mace and Cameron, man. So good. I mean, they're just fantastic. Then they're having a time in their lives. I really enjoy it because that's what
Starting point is 01:43:10 I like coming here and doing with y'all, is just coming here and fucking laughing at how ridiculous we all are. And you can see the joy from Cam when Mace starts to go off on a rant. And he's just like, I've known this motherfucker my whole life. This guy is so goddamn funny.
Starting point is 01:43:28 And when he started doing the thing about, listen, we got to be honest here. We say all the time, I don't care what you do in your free time. I don't care what you do when you're by yourself. We do care. Stop lying. Stop lying. We do care. We do care, Doe White.
Starting point is 01:43:46 He called him Doe White. I did not know Mace was that funny, yo. Bro. This is the best thing for Mace. I knew Cam was funny, but I didn't know Mace was this funny. Facts, bro. That shit was hilarious.
Starting point is 01:43:58 He's like, bro. He has bits. He has bits. He goes, they're asking if it's consensual. A surprise is never consensual. Yo, it's like a funny line. That's a dirt stuff. Because that's what the guy is, I guess, saying.
Starting point is 01:44:13 He surprised him. Someone's in the closet, and they pop down and surprise him. And he goes, a surprise is never consensual, Dwight. That's the point of a surprise. Like, bro, just. So he just can't have a guy pop out in a leprechaun costume. It's like, what?
Starting point is 01:44:31 Nah, it's fantastic. Go check it out. Anybody on their team, please hit them up. We would love to have them. We need Mason Cam, bro. We need Mason Cam to come by Flavor. And Dwight for that matter. Can we get Dwight on?
Starting point is 01:44:44 Shout out to Dwight, man. We need a Mason can to come by flavor. And Dwight, for that matter. Can we get Dwight on? Yo, we need Dwight. Shout out to Dwight, man. Superman. Do your fucking thang. Do your thang, Dwight. Do your thang. We saw Dwight at Burning Man. Exactly. And let the record show, he was with women the whole time.
Starting point is 01:44:59 Passion tips, probably. Miserable. Miserable. It was the desert, bro. It was sunny. Yeah, man. Yeah, now we got to have Dwight on. We got to talk about all that shit. You were swapping blunts with him, right? Swapping a spit?
Starting point is 01:45:10 No. You sure? Wait, you shared a blunt with him? Yeah, I think he talked about it on the podcast. Yeah. I remember you talking about it. You was like going, passing it back and forth. No, what?
Starting point is 01:45:20 And he was like, damn, it's a little wet. I'm just going to get smoked out. What are you talking about? I want to say, do whatever you do, because it's your life and it's nobody else's business. That's true. And we shouldn't care. Thank you. But I care that you are swapping.
Starting point is 01:45:34 Bro, he's Superman. Superman passed you a joint. What are you going to do? Superman passed you a joint. What are you going to say? At that point, it was Superman. Now he's the gay guy. He's not. He's not.
Starting point is 01:45:45 He's not. Alligators are still there. We don't know anything. Yo, first of all, there's nothing wrong with being gay, but I want him to double down on that shit. Yeah, I agree. Tell us he was smoking out Chinaman when he was over there in Taiwan. Love it. Love it.
Starting point is 01:45:56 Yeah. We would love that. Just be real. We just- Yo, come- We accept you. Alex is going to let you crack back, chicks. Hey, no.
Starting point is 01:46:04 Come on, yo. No, Alex will. Yo, let him make some espresso out of you. Thatc's going to let you crack back, chicks. Hey, no. Come on, yo. Yo, let him make some espresso out of you. That's his hometown hero. Nah, nah. He's going to flick your beans, baby. He's going to flick your little. But you have your nails painted, bro. Don't matter.
Starting point is 01:46:15 He likes guys like you. That's your hero. You don't want girly shit. Yes, he does. Nah, you can tell. He likes a guy like Al. He likes a guy like Al, bro. I'm telling you.
Starting point is 01:46:22 He want a man's man. Nah, you can tell he's a milkman. He's a milkman, yeah. He wants that mark ass. Nah, he wants like Al, bro. He want a man's man. Nah, you can tell he's a milkman. He's a milkman. Nah, he wants that Mark ass. Nah, he wants an espresso, bro. What about both of y'all? What about a little latte? Oh, he would love that.
Starting point is 01:46:33 I might pop out. Let's go. We got you, Dwight. Anyway, yo, go check out It Is What It Is, man. They're fucking great. Guys, thank you so much for tuning in, watching. Appreciate you, and I appreciate all the birthday wishes. Thank you very much for that.
Starting point is 01:46:50 It means a lot. And we'll see you guys on Patreon Friday. Peace.

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