Another Below Deck Podcast - A Michelin Star Talking To | Below Deck S9 E11

Episode Date: August 13, 2024

Dylan and Patrick are back to break down the needless details of caviar, the difference between knives, sea rat love, a weird talking to and more from Bravo's Below Deck Med. Ad Free and Uncensored at Patreon.com/AnotherPodcastNetworkYoutube at https://www.youtube.com/@anotherbelowdeckpodcast_Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/badtvpodcast/Facebook Group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/anotherbelowdeckpodcastGo to MagicMind.com/BelowDeck and Use code BADTVGo to BodySmartFitness.com and mention the show in your application. Use code BADTV in the Tropical Smoothie App 

She's fallen under this category of we already know that you're useless, so you're unfirable. There are no expectations. Which seems stupid to me. There have to be expectations. Yeah. I mean, we've had, we had Kiko who, you know, he wasn't that bad. He just knew how to make one Brazilian fish stew and just kept serving that. And then, you know, the death knell was serving Domino Brownies

to black people, which is inappropriate. Hi, hello there, everybody listening. And hi, hello there. This is another Below Deck podcast. I'm Dylan and that's Pat. Permission to come aboard. Granted. What's up, dude? Not much. Yeah. We've got an episode of Below Deck to recap this episode of this podcast brought to you by Magic Mountain Tropical Smithy Kepfer. Oh, and also- BodySmart. That's right. Oh my gosh. Three ad episode, everybody. We'll do our best to make them funny. If you want to listen to them, they'll be great. They'll be super humorous. But if you don't want to listen to them, go to patreon.com slash another podcast network where we are also breaking down

ABC's The Bachelor. What a magnificent journey it's been for Jen, for Blaze, for Goose, for all involved. I'm enjoying it. Yeah, it's good. And you get to enjoy it too. Dylan, you mentioned the patreon.com slash another podcast network for five bucks. Yeah, donate a little more.

So what's up, dude? Did you like the episode? It's my favorite episode of the season. Yeah. And you know why. What makes great TV, Dylan? Villains. Horrible people. I'm not going to say all the charter guests were horrible people. There was really just a couple. The others were lovely, but it only takes two in the batch to make it rotten.

Right, right, right. Yeah. I mean, if you're making some kind of bitches brew and you add just a drop of arsenic or a drop of cyanide, it'll kill everybody. You know, I don't think the Jonestown punch was all bad. You know, it just had a couple of things in it that wiped out the whole cult. Imagine me and the guy to live though. And he drank it. He's like, Hey, I'm not feeling anything. Hey, Larry, I wonder if seeing Larry and the rest of the Jonestown cult parish, if he was disillusioned by the teachings or if he was like, or if he was like, I learned a lot and I'm dead. Great. Well, you know, we're trying to pass through the firmament into a more pure world. So into a more pure world. So I got to say they were awful, revolting, disgusting, one or two specifically.

But Sandy's conversation with them was- Oh, the kindergartener teacher moment about kindness? I mean, we've seen worse people on this show or at least equal and we haven't had any like crisscross applesauce everybody sit down. I want to talk about ethics with you guys. I mean, that was crazy. Let me say this. Yeah. Well, it was uncomfortable. It was in fact, amazing. I think it might have been unnecessary. And dare I say unprofessional. Yeah, I loved it though. But

Sandy, keep in mind, they were rude and short with the help. One of them didn't take a shit on the floor and point to it and say, one of you eat it, right? Because that would have garnered them getting to talk into like this. I'm glad we agree on that because I was like, whoa, that that little talk was absolutely inappropriate. Yeah. Yeah, it was great TV though. Great TV. Well, to be fair, Bailey died.

So, you know, she was in probably in a moment. Let's cut her a break. How many votes? Oh, well, I'm not done yet. I need to attack these people. Okay, first off, I'm gonna pronounce some names wrong. I think it's Nasla, whatever. It sounds like you got it. Nasly. It sounds like you got it ahead. Okay, first off, I'm going to pronounce some names wrong. I think it's Nasla, whatever. It sounds like you got it right.

It sounds like you got it right. Okay. You're on a yacht. Relax. That's a microaggression. And you know that and everybody knows that. Okay, fair enough. Yeah.

Go back to Riverside or whatever filthy, yucky, normie region you're from because you are low rent trash. Yeah. And I'd love to have you on the podcast to hear your side. We would love to have every single one of these people on the show individually, maybe two. I mean, you know, not too many. It'll be a mess. But, you know, when we're talking about cutlery and caviar service, let's drop the act and let's all just be honest that you're on a heavily discounted one day charter. Okay. So, um, stop. You know, I think sometimes want to be people want to give a portrayal of what they think

Leonardo DiCaprio would behave like when he started his yacht. And the truth is Leo probably behaves himself because he knows someone will take a picture, a video and send it to TMZ. So Leo's on his best behavior. He does not fuck with the staff about the correct knife. Tanner Iskra No. I mean, he takes 23 year olds into the main suite and he duct tapes headphones to his head and listens to death metal while he plows away at them, which is just, you know, listen, what people do behind closed doors, it's not our business. Well, okay. So these people are idiots. I saw right through it. I see through classless morons trying to look like they're rich a mile away. It's so transparent because you're always critiquing. I couldn't stand these people. And Dylan, you pointed out, I have to get

ahold of one of these Sea Rats. And we can't have Bravo PR on the phone with us when we do it, because I have to ask them, are you guys, is there a different way that you're looking at service knowing that it's not $60,000 a day? It's probably $2,500 a person and they're still treating you like a piece of crap. Does that affect how you serve them? Yeah. We'll see. Maybe, you know, we're trying to be good with Bravo, so I don't know if still treating you like a piece of crap. Does that affect how you serve them? Yeah, we'll see. Maybe, you know, we're trying to be good with Bravo. So I don't know if we can ever speak to a Sea Rat ever again without Bravo there, but we'll see. Okay. All in all, it's $60,000 a day taste on a $2,500 a day budget. Go fuck yourself. 100 knots.

Really? Yeah. Yeah. By the way, halfway through the episode, Kermit started saying what I was thinking in my head. I'm like, Kermit, you go there, girl. Yeah. Yeah. Asia had a marvelous episode. I'm, I'm, you know, falling in love more and more with Asia and with Sandy with every episode. They're just, Asia is such a fucking rock star, especially this episode. Like to know where the line is to go, Oh, you know what, actually, no, you're not going to do that. Okay. Bitch. That was one of those moments where I think as Kermit staring down, Naysa's, Naila's whatever, nauseating. I'm going to call her nausea. Okay. Nausea. Nausea. All right.

She's like a Greek god of sickness. Of annoyingness. Yeah. Okay. I think Kermit was staring her down the eyes and as she was saying, I've been doing this for 20 years, it was, hey loser, we all know that you pay $2,500 to be here. Don't you dare try this on. Don't mother of pearl me.

Okay. 100 knots. 91 pots. So let's get into it. We left off with Brie, not just not being good at laundry, but kind of in this like Dragon Ball Z time capsule that room is. I mean, she's losing her mind. She's losing her mind. She's losing her mind.

Nope. Dale, you know who else has lost his mind? Ian. Ian. He says, regarding as they prep the boat, you know, for the charter guests coming on, he's going to try and avoid any more hiccups. Like the ones in the previous charters, hiccup would be leaving a dirty glass on one of the tables overnight.

It's not being in another dimension and not seeing people. Yeah, no, and we got to cut it. That's labeled as a fuck up. Right. We got to cut him some slack though, because he is, you know, he's been tapped by they, you know, the fifth dimensional beings who, you know, the same people that led, who was in 2001 space Odyssey, who was the main guy? Oh God, I don't know.

Let us know in the comments, The same people that led him to that room where he turned into a baby are the people who have tapped Ian to hold together the realms to what end I'm not sure. But with that responsibility, we've got to cut Ian some slack because I'm sure that's very distracting. I bet it is. Yeah. I mean, I mean, yeah, you'd be right to bet that it is. So I just, I see him in the cosmos with ropes of energy, just tied to all of his limbs. And he's just doing everything he can to not completely collapse the universe. And he's got to worry about fucking lines and shit. I mean I have a

lot of sympathy for him. That's what happened to his hair probably too. That's why he wears a hat. Yeah exactly. So, Gail doesn't have tender experience. Life is about little wins. Very cute that she's so excited about this. They pick up provisions including the balloon wreath for the fire and ice party. Yeah, probably about $300. I got one for my daughter for her fourth birthday. It was Frozen, Elsa and Nana. Yeah, $300. Those things cost a lot of money.

That movie really had quite an impact, huh? You know, I've seen it 20 times from beginning to end. I bet you like it. Very overrated film. Oh, really? I don't like it, and I don't actually like the messaging of it either. What is the messaging of it? Well, it's bonding over sisters, but one of them gets really mad because she doesn't want her sister to marry a guy because

she thinks he's a loser. Turns out he is. So she was right. But as a result, she almost hurts the entire town, freezes the entire town. And then rather than fix it, just wanders off out into the cold and lives in a frozen castle. Oh, got it, got it, got it. So it's a tale of kind of like short-sighted vengeance, that kind of thing. Yeah. Well, it's probably better than Grease. I don't think so. Except, you know, a lot of people don't talk about Grease

still, the last third of that film really falls off. Oh, yeah. And then you have, of course, have the last two songs, but it makes up for it. Yeah. I mean, I love that film so much. They, um, it's just such a special movie. Um, everybody's 40 except for the Puerto Rican dance queen who is 60. And, um, you know, Olivia Newton, John is just smoking by the end of it.

Well, you also pointed out Dylan, nothing says female empowerment. Like change. Right. Just conform to the demands and the aesthetic wishes of Danny Zuko. Therein you will find fulfillment, self-love and happiness. Let's talk about Magic Mind. Magic Mind is a magical company. It is a mental performance shot that will send you to the stars. How many languages are you at?

Six. So we've gone from 19 to six. I haven't been taking my Magic Mind. I drank all my shipment and also our nanny has been drinking it too. She just gave her her resignation in yesterday. Yeah. And we've lost a lot of home care to Magic Mind, but that's a good thing. Right. These positions aren't permanent. They are stepping stones. The spectrum though, from going from a nanny to an astronaut is pretty big though. Yeah. I'm proud of it. It's absolutely marvelous. But Magic Mind can get you there. Do you want to be an astronaut? You'll be one. Do you want to be a God? You'll be one. Do you want to be a God? You'll be one. Go to magicmind.com slash below deck, enter in below deck 20 to get 20% off a first

time order or 48% off a first time subscription. This stuff really, really is magical. It would help the show a lot and help you a lot if you went to magicmind.com slash below deck use promo code below deck 20. Okay, so guests arrive, guests arrive, they are already quite pissed about the whole tender thing. And as they hop aboard, they proclaim I hope they have mother of Pearl spoons. This is one of these things that, you know, I mean, you can just tell from a mile away that they don't know what the fuck they're talking about,

because if you go to a Michelin star restaurant, the likes of which they want replicated on this boat with one chef. The canals will be made with silver spoons in the back of house. So we really don't need to do this whole fucking thing. Yeah. But will balloon reefs be there as well? Yeah. You know, because nothing says Michelin experience like a balloon reef, you know, would delight a nine year old. You know, I heard that the French Laundry has like five of them in there. Yeah, 11 Madison Park and French Laundry, you know, you get up and you move throughout the restaurant. And as you do, the balloon wreaths are kind of color themed to the vibe or ethos of the next setting. Last time I was there, two of them were carrots.

Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know what that was about. Well, so maybe they're right. Mike Dunks, they set up a basketball hoop because he's an ex basketball player. I hope that he requested that because it's not even a racial thing. It's a work thing. It's like giving a... So somebody's a retired lawyer

and you put like one of those big leather-bound books in front of it. Like, I don't do this anymore. You remember my birthday that my wife threw it for me when we went to the nice place where we dined. There was a bunch of microphones around us, right? Yeah. You remember that.

It's like, why have you put a basketball hoop up? I think it was requested. I hope. So the couches are an eyesore. The guests asked the Sea Rats to move the couches for a picture. They make it seem, or they made it seem in the previews, that it was this, I want them gone until we're gone,

or at least that's what I picked up on. Getting them out of the way for a picture, I didn't think was that ridiculous. were gone, or at least that's what I picked up on. Getting them out of the way for a picture, I didn't think was that ridiculous, but we really start to get into the deep waters of scumbag behavior when you point to an espresso martini that is 10 feet away from you and you tell someone to go get it for you

without a please, a thank you, really just a point. I couldn't do that. No, I couldn't do it. Could not do it. I don't care if I was a billionaire. I could not do that. I could not do it.

I mean, what on planet earth? Overcompensate. It's just crazy, man. Yeah. I used to notice this when I worked at that recording studio. It would always be rich people call it new money. It's just, it would be a new artist that got signed to a label. They were always the ones bossing me around, sending me out on 10 different runs to go get different types of things. It was like, wow. And then I could never figure it out.

Do you think this is what Led Zeppelin behaved like? And they probably did. Don't get me wrong. Far worse. I mean, they shoved salmon on people's orifices, I think. It was a shark. Bull sharks. Yeah.

Something like that, which seems physically impossible to me, let alone sexual and animal abuse. So that's quite a quite an ad lib we filled out there with that. It was on page 117 in Hammer of the Golds. Yeah, really? We had that was a lot of fodder for a third this third grader. Yeah, and who wrote Hammer of the Gods? I don't know. Is it some Rolling Stone journalist or something? Probably hit job definitely. Hey, hey, hey, you're

in the circle of trust. Okay. Don't tell anybody about the fish for shoving up people. It's ridiculous. Where's your tact? So, and we'd love to have any of these people on, as we said, but again, we should remind you, you are on a discount day trip. Don't be. You're not in there will be blood. Okay? You're not a fucking Rockefeller. So stop doing this. The guests spend some time in the water. Ellie goes out to give a vodka soda to somebody. And you want to take this? Well, I kind of forget, but it was like one of those things like, hey, let's, let's all put it in an order together as opposed to-

Well, even worse. I mean, it graduated to that, but she brings the vodka soda out to one woman who's asked for a vodka soda. The other woman says, where's mine? Ellie says, oh, well, she, I only got an order for one. And she says, I thought you were going to surprise me. I'm sorry. I don't know. Maybe the Balkan biscuit can read mine. What is going on with you people? How could you possibly think that that's even remotely logical? A couple of these charter guests strike me as extreme narcissists. And so they will be hearing this. I just know that about them. Please, please come on and defend this behavior.

Oh yeah. Please. We will not edit it. We will play it just as the interview. Please contact us. Yeah, hit us up on Instagram. Or if any of you savvy barnacles want to do this, this will just make good podcasts. If you can find Naysha or Marhisha, I think that's how you say her name, find them, tell them we were talking shit about them and we'd love to have them on and we will have them on. Gosh. Chuck and Erica? Simple Chuck. I'm still friends with Erica Rose. We had the same OBGYN who passed away. We bonded over that. He was a good guy. Very wise. So the primary wants a culinary masterpiece that rivals Michelin star cuisine. So we're getting ready for that evening. The dry ice is there, the caviar is there, the whole nine yards. They almost popped the fire and ice wreath, which would

have been an absolute disaster because you can't have a East Egg or West Egg Gatsby kind of party without this reef. Reef. Oh yeah. But while the guests sample the caviar, they ask for the chef. Oh yes. By the way, having caviar, nothing says class like caviar. Yeah. It's just this like, what, what Sky Mall magazine are you guys using for this fucking va- It's like, it's just fucking crazy. Also, what would you like to know? It's fish fucking eggs. Yeah. And they go great on a cracker. Anything else you'd like to know?

Well, Asia calls Jono up and you know, this is really the only fumble of Asia's entire performance this evening. Otherwise she was flawless. She phones him up. She goes, hey, they'd like to talk to you about, she just said they'd like to talk to you. Hey, send up a flair, tell them they want to talk about the caviar. Give them a second to go. You know what I mean? Because otherwise he just, he's coming up to a firing squad. Luckily for them... I don't think she knew he was coming up to a firing squad. Well, luckily for them, they... And it's the same thing with the butter fish knife thing. They don't want to really inquire about anything. They just want to exercise control and dissatisfaction over the help. So this woman has no questions because she has no

knowledge of caviar. She just says, this tastes like shit, get out of my face. A dirty wash cloth, to be exact. And so he, he let her know that it's beluga caviar, which I don't know if a lot of people know this. I only knew this because we worked for our former employer We put it a sampling of it in one of our boxes So I had to learn a little bit about beluga caviar was actually against the law To propagate or whatever for about 20 years because that type of fish was going extinct So it's pretty hard to get up until like 2017 so it's it's kind of in demand Yeah, so doesn't that make you like it better?

You fucking wannabes. Right. And it's also kind of an acquired taste. And it's also just a spiritually unwell thing to consume. I mean, it's just bizarre. It's just like, I mean, listen, we're the masters of the universe. We get to harvest whatever we want from animals, but it's just how I cut you open and pull out all the eggs. 400 of your little babies. Yeah, it's just nuts. Yeah. And just to put a final point on Dylan's point, calling something that is expensive piss does

not elevate you. No, no, no, no, it doesn't. So classless. So she loses another dress. But before we get there. I have it doesn't. So classless. She's loses another dress. But before we get there, I have thoughts on this. Yes. Okay. So the way that she kind of works out how she should not be punished on this is she's

going to beat it with a technicality, which is even though it's a mess up, it was done prior to her given the ultimatum. She Bob Shapiro is the whole thing. Okay. I experienced this. So on one of our past APS shows a long time ago, I had a next door neighbor in this shitty apartment I lived next to named Rob. Rob wanted to kill me. I had Rob put in jail twice for trying to kill me. So I tell the landlord, hey, Rob's trying to kill me and he's been arrested twice for it. I sent the police reports. I want this guy out of here. So they send him a letter that says, Rob, if you do anything bad to Pat, you're

out of here. You're getting evicted, right? So come to come to find out. He put nails in my goddamn tire. I let them know. And they said, when did you find him? And I said, yesterday, they said, that's before we sent the letter. Right, John, a technicality. Right. Right. Yeah. I mean, listen, the justice system is a very flawed system. You know, like we've talked about before, the man that killed three to four women by betting them and then staging a robbery wherein he would save himself and nobody else and then take all their money. Even if you can't nail the guy with forensic evidence, he did it.

It's been four times. That's right. We need common sense. That's what we need. Yeah. Common sense. Listen, you are not going to fall into the throes of any blood lust or anything

if you are on Tropic Time. You're just not. You're absolutely not. You're going to be way too blissful, way too full, and way too happy. Dale, let me admit something. I could hang out with Marheesha and Nasla Anazia on the beach.

As long as I'm drinking a tropical cafe smoothie, I'm having the best time of my life. If you have a watermelon mint mojito in your hand. They're my best friends. Hey, I love you guys. You know what? I'd go a step further. I'd say, you know, let's time travel a little bit. You're in the trenches of world war one. And do I have a musket with one of those knives on the

end of it? You have a musket. It's it's jammed. It's it's the barrel is soaked in mud and blood. So it doesn't work. It doesn't work. And, and there's a stampede coming. If you have a watermelon bit bohita, I mean, I just hold it up and just say, Hey, why don't we just call it a day? Yeah. And the thing is, we're on topic time now. They would send some kind of ambassador over the mound to go, well, listen, let's try it. And if he took one sip, you know, Franz Ferdinand be gone, the whole thing would have gotten sorted out. Tropical Smoothie Cafe will bring world peace one day. And you can have just a little taste of it

by going to one of the 1,400 plus locations or use the app. Use promo code BADTV with said app. Be happy. Be guava. Be mango, be on Tropic Time now. And then according to Sandy, be kind. So the dress is in Ellie's bag. It is not washed and she's protected by the technicality. She's got to be up there with some of the worst sea rats we've ever had. I mean, I would say it's usually in the chef department. Hold on. We've had worse, but they've been fired. She's fallen under this category of we already know that you're useless, so you're unfirable. There are no expectations. Yep. Yep. Yep.

Yep. Yep. Yep. Which seems stupid to me. There have to be expectations. Yeah. I mean, we've had, we had Kiko who, you know, he wasn't that bad. He just knew how to make one Brazilian fish stew and just kept serving that.

And then, you know, the, the death knell was serving Domino brownies to black people, which is inappropriate. And Hannah told him to do that because she was on pills. But yeah, cheese is one of the worst we've ever seen. So anyways, the caveat, well, Ellie equally wrong goes, I could take this upstairs and get her fired, but she's Bambi, so we can't do that. I don't know that you could, Ellie, because remember, Sandy hates both of you. So I don't know that that would work the way that you think it's going to work. So the dinner dinner is served. It's. Oh, I'll let you get into it. I just want to say Kermit does something here and Sandy's

done it, which is the plate goes down in front of the paying guests. They take two bites out of it. They stand over them, lording over, you can see their shadow and they go, how's the food? Be like, get out of here. What are you still doing here? You put the plate down, right?

There's old Patty being mean now. Now I'm one of those charter guests. I'm a wannabe. Well, it's the same thing they do with the French laundry. They drop the bread and they just watch. When my mom worked at a restaurant, she couldn't afford to send me anywhere. So I just go to work with her all day at King's Corner Restaurant in Leamingston, Massachusetts. And so one day I made the mistake, the food gets put down in front of these two blue hairs, right?

They're sitting there gobbling it up, whatever swill they're gobbling it up. And I just sit cross-legged just watching them eat. And they turn to me and tell a six-year-old at some point, hey, get lost. Scared the hell out of me. We're trying to eat our chicken pot pie without our dentures. Get the fuck out of here. This is an undignified experience. We don't want you watching. They could have been nicer about it. Yeah, absolutely. But they're very close to the ground. So we'll give them a little slack. So seared sea bass and crab couscous. That's weird. Crab couscous sounds weird to me.

But- Me too. Yeah. But in a wild turn of events, they liked the food. I thought the plating was amateur and I thought that they were absolutely going to get crucified for sending this out to these high, high class exquisite pallet clients, but they actually gobbled it all up like the shit pumps they are.

We then get to- Oh, can I do a meanwhile? Yeah, sure. Meanwhile, Joe and the Balkan Biscuit, they kind of run into each other and they start to flirt a bit. And then Joe tells us like, Hey, a few days ago, I thought I lost the Balkan biscuit. And but I think there's a chance to rekindle that magic and have meaningless, forgettable, see rat sex.

I think that seems doable for him. Yeah. And somebody could argue, I'm sure you're listening or going, you may be driving off the road going, well, why, Pat, how could it could be memorable? No, no, no, there's no way. The way you, if you interview enough Sea Rats like Dylan and I have, and you hear them reflect back on their past hookups, you'd have the same feeling as us. Most of the time they want to erase Sea Rat hookups from their memory entirely. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, we've talked to so many Sea Rats and we've heard them all

say the same thing. They all say, you know, that one for men in black, I wish those actually existed. That's true. And also this flirtation is transpiring over garbage. Yeah. How are we getting hot and heavy over garbage? I think there's some kind of like pulling out or something that like, what's going on? That's a funny thought. You know what? You know where workplace never happens? The sewers,

the sewage factory. No, no, no. Cause it's all men who hate. No, I mean, listen, who's to say, I don't know the disposition of anybody working at a sewage plant. Hey, did you hook up with Tina, the new office gal? Yeah, she smelled like shit. Well, you, you did too, to be fair. So yeah, that should cancel. You know, in high school, they took us on a field trip to a sewage. I think it was trying to teach us about like, you know, being more green and how all the recycling of water. And I remember, I literally saw that turbine of sewage going through And I saw a carrot in poop.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did it pass through a human or do you think that it was just like thrown? It was all poop and I could see the various other things that were in it that hadn't been processed through the body. I was like, that's definitely a piece of a carrot. Well, what Cease and I do, my darling Cease and I do, if any carrots have gone bad, we just chuck them in the toilet because it makes it fit through the pipe. Perfect, you know, it kind of, it just makes sense to us. So that's probably what happened. These people are talking about debutant balls

while Joe and Ellie are flirting. The one lady, Swamp Rap. Nazia. Yeah, with a goose fan says her mother used to make her watch VHS tapes about etiquette, which is creepy. That is so fucking strange to me. But she complains that these fucking idiots put out a butter knife with no bread service while fanning herself. And she's speaking on- Well, I'm sorry. We're not at the Olive Garden, dear.

When you're here, you're family. And thank you for letting us know. I got to be better with the names, but somebody let me know that that is in fact the mantra of Olive Garden. When you're here, you're family. You're also sad. You know, before the birth of our- Oh, you're being poisoned. Before the birth of our daughter, Ellie, we went to Olive Garden as our last meal before

we went and checked into the hospital so we could give birth to Ellie. We went to Olive Garden as our last meal before we went and checked into the hospital so we give birth to Ellie. And in my mind, I was thinking, if we get in a car accident right now, the news will report sad couple going to the hospital for their firstborn died tragically after eating at Olive Garden. I don't know that that would be the headline, but there would be a debate about whether or not to put that in the report. Like, you know, they, they, this is a tragedy, they all perished, but do we need to kind of add insult to injury and say that they were hopped up on Italian wedding soup and yoga mats before they perished? You know, what even he is in that chicken Alfredo. bats before they perished. You know, what even he is in that chicken Alfredo.

God knows. Yeah. So she is wondering about telling the service. And she has a certain bashful glee about the whole thing. She's really excited to tell Asia that she fucked up. And she does. And Asia returns fire. She says, um, actually it's a fish knife because the, uh, it's a protein. It's more delicate than, uh, you know, your steak, your pork, your chicken. I said, that's what that's for.

And the lady is incensed because again, similar to the caviar thing, she didn't want to have a conversation about this. She just wanted to embarrass Asia. Trey Lockerbie That's right. Something else must have been getting under Nasia's skin earlier in the day to kind of feel like you got to put this forth. I'm feeling like she had an axe to grind. Trey Lockerbie Yeah, Nasia has got to get into a life or death situation, you know, similar to Larry David tumbling in the waves of Zuma Beach. Your life has to flash before your eyes in order to change the kind of nauseous character that is taking over your life.

It's not beneficial to really anybody. Yeah. And by the way, Dale, after this little bumping of heads here, she proceeds to do what most morons do when they've been put in their place. She doubles down and gets angry. Talk about doubling down. She says out loud, loudly, yeah, well, your caviar service sucked. And listen, it did. He's right. You're a gremlin. You know, I think what's the old adage? Gremlins can be right twice a day. Is that it? But yeah, I mean, you're right. Your bones bend in different ways, but you're

right. The caviar Service did kind of suck. Now, let me say this though, Dill. Now we have laid off the other charter guests because they haven't been as vocal and as annoying as Nazia. Some of the other charter guests were just really nice. But the annoying charter guests have spouses. You got to speak up spouses. Okay? My wife gets at me all the time. If I say something annoying, stupid or rude, I get a fucking jab right in my chest. Yeah. Because spousal relationships, monogamous love, you're supposed to make each other better. That's right.

Right. You're not supposed to cower and fear because you've tried to speak up too many times about your wife or your husband throwing wine at waiters because it's too dry or too oaky, which is something that I'd imagine these people would do at the Olive Garden. So let's head to the steak course. But before we get there, let's take a little break to talk about BodySmart. This episode is brought to you by BodySmart. One-on-one coaching is just a common sense company. Totally common sense. I don't know why this is the first time I've ever heard of something like this. And, Dill, you know, I stay up really late at night and I watch all these ads. There's always someone trying to pitch you on how you can lose weight, right?

And it's all these, you eat all these cookies and you'll lose weight. But this, this is actually common sense. This will really get it done for you. Dr. Justin Marchegiani, Ph.D. You know, it's, it's, it's something that, okay, so, so body smart is personalized coaching. Okay. Okay, so BodySmart is personalized coaching, okay? If you're having difficulty losing weight, working out, being your best self, BodySmart will be there to keep the motivation going. Imagine running next to David Goggins telling you that you're a lump of coal or something

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last weight loss program you'll ever need as you're guided by your dedicated one-on-one coach to make healthy changes that last. Lose 30 to 60 pounds in under six months with no pills or gimmicks, just science-based habits and skills that will leave you feeling in control, energized, and in the best shape of your life. And the good thing about this is you do a six month thing with them, and then you have that rubric for the rest of your life. You've learned a lot. You know how to do it. You've changed your behavior. Visit bodiesmartfitness.com. Mention this show in your application to get 20% off your coaching program. That's bodiesmartfitness.com. Okay, so wrapping up the episode here. Again, there are a couple page of notes. How the hell do I have

that? Oh, yeah, I got a lot of notes too. That's why. All right. So Dill, Gail and Nate snuggle at this point and she has one request for the Sea Rat. Don't turn out to be a dick. Yeah, that's a tall order there, Gail. Yeah, he says I won't hurt you. Yeah, we'll see. Second course. Tomahawk served with a smattering of beat reduction. Everyone likes it, even the little terrier, Nasia. But she can't let on. It's a little tough, she says, because the night is now

ruined for her. She's lost in some kind of insane gauntlet she's in, and now her night is over. Sandy comes out. She tries to bizarrely saddle up to her. I think that she wants to tell her what happened. Okay. So you're talking about when Sandy and Kermit talk in the bar. Another- No, I'm talking about when Sandy comes out to check on everybody.

Oh yes. I kind of feel that too. Sorry. Yeah. Yeah. But we go upstairs, the women are not happy with the service. They're essentially going to war with the women of this vessel. It's really bizarre. It's internalized misogyny of the ruling elite. And that you texted me that before we got going and you spotted it from a mile away. They sent up Joe to distract them and it works flawlessly despite the women seeing exactly what the trick was. The main primary heads to bed but wants a snack. Only got sandwiches though.

Well, the problem is I don't eat sandwiches. Well, I got some berries. Yeah. Fruit would do good. This woman is, she's on the verge of grabbing the fish knife and driving it into Asia. She's so pissed off. I bet if we talk to these horrible charter guests,

I guarantee they'll tell us there was stuff going on behind the scenes that got under their skin. I don't think so. I don't think so at all. You think they've just, they're coming on here with this horrible attitude? I think they're just shit pumped people and we'd love to have you on. I want to have you on. I got to know what's behind all this. So we get to the next day, breakfast is served. Ian is a management genius.

While he's holding realms together, he has kind of accidentally formed a team that is self-sufficient. Brilliant. Captain Sandy heads up to go tell the guests. Well, if one thing happens first, this is what starts this. So in the morning, Kermit is going down the stairs as I believe Mahisha is walking up the stairs. She said, good morning. And

Marissa says, can we eat now? And so she tells Sandy that she was kind of rude to her about that. Well, and we should also say that, you know, karma sometimes has a long tail and sometimes it strikes instantaneously. That's why there are YouTube rabbit holes that you can fall down for 19 to 65 hours called instant karma. And that's exactly what the primary gets the night before after she throws a fit about the sandwiches, she eats shit on the stairs. And then that's the, you know, we get into physics and, you know, interstellar and all

this stuff, but right there just shows you that God does exist. Yeah. Or karma. Right. Universal forces, the days of this world struck her down. So the guests head out to, well, let's talk about this Sandy conversation. This was the best part of the episode. I cannot believe she did this. I'm telling you, there's something behind this where the crew and Sandy feels like she made a case that someone paid a million dollars for a charter and they were treating her help like her crew like shit.

Dude, maybe it's because I'm reading Robin D'Angelo's 150 page tome, right? There's only, hold on. The bulk of the charter guests are white people on this chart. I don't know. It was weird to me that they'd had this conversation. I don't want to put that on Sandy, but it was strange. I think it had more to do with that. And I know you guys only paid collectively $20,000 for this, which by the way, if you think about it, all right, so we're running over the episode. Having talked to the Sea Rats as I have and behind the scenes, below deck in order to

get people on these boats now, they are not paying for these boats. The tip is what they're paying. So if you see eight people or six people, it was basically about $2,500 for the full day each person. You get to be on TV, you got to go on that nice little tour of the town. You get to be on a yacht. Right. Because wealthy people don't want their shit,

their dirty laundry out. They did it the first three seasons, and they saw what happens to them when they're on TV. So the guests head out to an ancient Greek node. Obviously, we will turn this into a backdrop for Instagram photos and not take in any of the cosmic beauty of it. They speak on fertility and Ellie is validated.

Her and Joe, I think, are going to have children. Ellie needs to calm down. Joe is a scumbag who, maybe he evolves into a father and a responsible male and a productive member of society, but right now he's just addicted to pussy when he gets drunk. And also Joe is a sad example of what happens with guys at some point, if they're lucky, which is one minute, no one wants you. Next moment, you got two women after you, and then you think you're fucking George Clooney. And you're not. Yeah, no. George Clooney's not gay. No.

So it turns out that Bailey died. It was more Leah's dog, but Sandy's away from Leah. I think that's what makes her so sad. I just fucking love Sandy. I don't know what is happening, but she's just amazing. And I don't know, it got me in my feels when she talks about the losses that you experience when you're out at sea. No, you miss a lot of things. But that's losses that you experience when you're out at sea. You miss a lot of things.

But that's the life you chose to lead. That's right. So Jono is getting ready for lunch and the guests have turned their attitudes right the fuck around. Joe shows Nathan a picture of Ellie and him kissing and he wants to vomit in his mouth. She overhears them, or Cheese overhears everybody being quiet and she spirals. And she'll fuck Joe next episode. Not sure why, how, I guess everybody has needs. But dare I say cheese, you're better than that. No, I'm going to take that back. I don't think she is.

So Joe shows already covered that lunches, crispy duck, scallion pancakes. We fancy out here. Jono is crushing it. Absolutely crushing it. It looked so good. It looked like a perfect lunch. I'm gonna give it 92 pots. Wow. Yeah, very high. Gail is stuck between a rock and a hard place because eyebrows wants absolutely nothing to do with Ellie. Where'd you save that piece of gold name? I could use that all season.

What's that? Eyebrows? Yeah. I don't know. I think we've called them eyebrows before, but it should be the only thing that we refer to him by. Small children could play hide and seek in those things. They're so thick.

So it's like a follicle loogie. So Ellie is in love with him. Gail knows he's disgusted by her. What does Gail do? The charter guest depart. Okay, so normally the charter guest departing is just a formality. Yeah. But in this case, it was wonderful because Mahisha takes her time to point out the lovebirds. So once again, if I had done that, my wife would throw an elbow into my chest. Now we get into the tip and what is Sandy's first question? Who are the lovebirds? Way to go, Sandy. Make things uncomfortable. Way to go, Sandy. And the two lovebirds are no one.

No one on this boat are lovebirds. No. Maybe Nathan and Gail, but no. No. They're sea rats. Love is too complicated an emotional stage. Yeah, I don't want love, as it's defined, to be associated with anything that's taking place

on this boat right now. Yep. So what's tip? Well, it was 20 grand. A marvelous one day chip. One day. Chip. Just so if you aggregate that out,

if it was three days, that tip would be 60 grand. Well, it wouldn't be. No. It would be 22 grand. It would have been 20,000. That's right. All right, so next up, this is kind of fun. The Balkan Biscuit is probably realizing it's near the end of the season. She needs to make her mark here with some

kind of date. You know, if you go on a date, the cameras follow you. Right. She asked Joe out on the date. He says yes, reluctantly, and then decides in a moment of clarity while speaking with Nate, I want to fucking do this, I gotta tell her I don't wanna go. Nate says, it's an hour of your time and you said yes already, so don't be a piece of shit. But we end with him probably breaking off the date. So we'll see what happens next week.

We shall see. iTunes, five stars, kind words. Patreon.com slash another podcast network, Body Smart, Magic Mind, Tropical Smoothie, we love you so much, have a great week. We'll see you next week. I'm Dylan saying goodbye. Pat say goodbye. Later, Dylan. See you next time. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Love