Another Below Deck Podcast - If The Glove Doesn't Fit, Don't Go To Dublin | Below Deck Med S8 E16

Episode Date: September 17, 2024

Dylan and Pat are back to break down OJ Simpson and how he's kind of like Nathan but not, eggs on things, a proposal for the ages and more from Bravo's Below Deck Med. Ad Free and Uncensored at Patreon.com/AnotherPodcastNetworkYoutube at https://www.youtube.com/@anotherbelowdeckpodcast_Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/badtvpodcast/Facebook Group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/anotherbelowdeckpodcastGo to MagicMind.com/BelowDeck and Use code BADTVGo to BodySmartFitness.com and mention the show in your application. Use code BADTV in the Tropical Smoothie AppGo to Ro.co/BELOWDECK 

A dream is a wish your heart made That dream comes true on a Disney Cruise Step aboard and discover where memories meet adventure Where favorite Disney characters meet fun for everyone Where the most magical, fantastical things can happen If you just believe Believe in the dream that you wish will come true Disney Cruise Line, where magic meets the sea

Well Aisha puts Gail to bed in Nathan's bed, who is the one who the glove doesn't fit on. I mean, imagine putting Nicole Brown Simpson's head back on and then giving her back to OJ. Yeah, he hurt her. Doesn't make any sense. Hi there. Hello and welcome to another Brands Make New episode of another Below Deck Podcast. It's the penultimate episode. Wanted to give everybody a heads up. YouTube will be this episode will be on YouTube, our interview with Alex and Kyle. That was fun. A lot of people that have listened to the audio version of it. Yeah. They love it. We got really into winter house and

kind of how the below deck world works. Gary King, Barbie Barbie, lots of fun stuff. But yeah, my computer was on the fritz because for the second time in a yeah, my computer was on the fritz because for the second time in a row, my dear Dot, my Turkish fan, chewed a hole in the corner of my screen. You can't... it's just what a nightmare. I had to go to Best Buy. You know Best Buy. Yeah. It's my least favorite place in the world. Yeah, it's sad in there. You know, I drove to Best Buy. I was trying to return something, a screen that was not working. And I get this woman just and we're gonna just show it's working there or a

patron working there. Okay. She we go to the return thing. She doesn't even look at me. She's so pissed off that she has to work. And we get back. She is chopping it up with everybody back there. She's she Well, no one's in Best Buy. She's a bunch of workers just walking around talking to each other. They're all trying to fuck each other. They're all planning on how they're going to get to TGIF and slam away at each other. Right. And after the

second or third person she was talking to, I just had to interrupt and said, I have to go, you know? And sure, oh, I'm a Karen in that moment. This woman is doing, she's being very rude to me. I'm a paying customer at Best Buy, this mom and pop shop. I hope they all, every single one, close down. Nobody should be in those undignified blue polos. I mean, it's just it's not a force for good that store Well, you gotta you gotta have a brick-and-mortar place where you can buy a washer and dryer, you know

I used to go there to buy CDs. Now I go there to buy Ranges. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, so enough About that we have the panel to an episodeable adept to get into mm-hmm Lots of thoughts before we do can I do some housekeeping yeah Dylan And I were on a podcast called fixing famous hosted by Krista Rosa He's a reality TV producer and his co-host Dominic Dylan, and I killed it the concept is we try we kill it Oh, yeah, he said he loved our episode. Okay. The concept is Dylan and I came in there and we try and fix Tara Reed's career. The

pterodactyl. That's right, pterodice. And well, you know, we made a lot of hay out of that, some laughs, so go over support another podcast. Yeah, I think, you know, among the darkest moments in our nation's history, I mean, obviously you have slavery and others, but I think that the treatment of Tara Reid is, it might be on the podium. Yeah, man. Because... That's right up there when they didn't renew flavor of love for season four, you know? Right. So I think we've got slavery, um,

privacy, I taken JFK out and then it's a three a three b with Terry, the non renewal of flavor. And for those of you that are trying to find the review section of, of your wherever you're listening to this to attack us for making light of slavery. No, no, no, I said it was number one. Right, yeah. Yeah. You know, okay, so Katie Ledecky will beat the silver medalist by, I mean, 30 seconds sometimes.

She's way better than silver medal. Slavery's way sadder than what happened to Tara Reid on account of all of the bad stuff. I think most of us can agree to that. So anyways, great episode. Andy's getting married. Ellie is chasing Robin Williams across a frogger-like gaunt little flumber and we're losing our minds. So how many knots do you give a dill?

17. Okay, I have a fun game for the audience, the barnacles. Feel free to play along. The primary, I think his name is Stacy, he looks like Ralphie from A Christmas Story. Every time that sassy gay makes a sexual reference to just a random comment, drink. That movie is so weird to me.

Are you kidding me? I love that movie. So bizarre. You think so? In what way? You know, I think if I get older, I can put my finger on this, but there are certain things that just, there are certain like cultural subtextual languages that just don't translate as you get further down the road. I understand.

You know, I see Moonstruck and all I see is something that, I mean quite literally makes no sense. It's like a movie's dog shit. It was like, it was scribed by somebody in a soft room somewhere. I mean, Nick Cage is talking about killing himself over bread and then the next scene they're making out and calling each other wolves or something. I'm like, what is going on? Yeah, they got nominated for Oscars. But a Christmas story. I mean, the gut, the dad's got the lamp with the what is the lamp with the lamp? Okay, what is that? So that still

exists today. That's the old guy the leg? What is that? So that still exists today. That's the old guy that has always wanted something that he would have liked when he was younger and now he can buy it. But why the, that's such a, is that not a fucking bizarre thing to want? It probably could have been something more interesting, but I think in the right-

Like a car or a motorcycle or a gun. A Corvette. But in the 50s they didn't have Corvettes. They had lamps that were sexy legs of women. I mean, just a crazy movie to me. But anyways, we're not here to talk about any of that stuff. Okay, a couple other thoughts here I have to read. Get in the comments. Let us know if you like Moonstruck.

Let us know if you think Christmas story is weird. All right, so this was a random note that I had here. But Ian, the Boson. Yes, so this was a random note that I had here, but Ian, the Boson. Yes, the gatekeeper of multiple universes. That's right, he lives in another dimension and doesn't see things that we see here on earth. Right. He exists in another reality. Well, anyway, he's like Matt McConaughey, you know how Matt McConaughey fell into the in interstellar yeah that's the simulacrum or whatever the yeah yeah and the libraries I I really do and I'm not joking about this I really do believe that Ian is in a place like that oh yes

yes you know and he has a daughter somewhere from another time that he's trying to get in touch with yes yes yes he's trying to get in touch with. Yes, yes, yes. He's trying to tell her, don't watch this show. It's bad for you. Don't watch it. Well, I have thoughts on Ian Dillon. Okay, so he's gotten a lot of hate online because he's horrible at his job and he's messed up a little bit, but when you think about it, he really hasn't been on the show this season and why has he not been on this show? Because Bozen's on this show as we've come accustomed to are drunk womanizing pigs and that's normally how we are the way that we view their their their journey on this show yes he's been very boring and that's

his major crime yes hmm that was my one thought anyway hey can I tell you I think it was a good thought? Yeah You know you kind of you're damned if you do you're damned if you don't if you don't chase girls around and try and have Sex with multiple sea rats and drink your face off to the point where we think you have a problem Yeah, you're boring television, and then you can't get another season It's when it gets up when the face gets all red like that and you've like called the woman a bitch You're like eating spaghetti. I was of the can, you might have a drinking

problem. Well, you know, anyway, I thought it was a decent episode. But as per the usual case, we're winding the season down. There's not much, not much meat on this bone, but we'll do the best we can recapping it. Zero knots. Zero knots of course. So last charter everybody. Last charter. The drunk bubbly rebound we begin with from Gale. One moment weeping, one moment it just it kind of like I don't want to Dr. Drew Pinsky this because... You can't stand him. Well it's not that I can't stand him you know I don't I don't really have a lot of thoughts about Dr. Drew. I mean, I know that that show that he was on killed a lot of people. Yeah, I think the count is still going.

I'm not saying that Dr. Drew is responsible for that, but well, paying a drug addict one hundred thousand dollars to be exploited on a television show. Yeah, not something I do. Right. I mean, and again, I know't know if it wasn't Dr. Drew. It was just the, you know, I mean, whatever. It was executive producer.

Right. Yeah, exactly. And we're not doing anything slanderous or defamatory or libelous or anything. We're just saying that we disagree with the sentiment of paying drug addicts a bunch of money to exploit them. I mean, eight people that were on that reality show are dead.

I mean, the death rate is higher than the cast of Glee. Yeah, or poltergeist. And Glee had a poltergeist. So Gail is doing the baby voice. And the baby voice always scares me a little bit. The baby voice is, it's always why are we doing baby voice? Yeah, to me, you know, because babies are very specific thing. They're babies. That's true Or we're referring to where she was being held by Kermit. Yes the bubbly rebound Yeah, you know, I gotta tell you del as far as nights go the the ending in this this night was pretty anticlimactic You know, we have the alcohol induced emotional collapse. That was gale. We have eating cold pizza i do agree with uh carry there

i like my hawaiian pizza right out of the fridge you don't need to heat that up can i tell you my wife is constantly amazed i love cold food oh yes i'll eat cold everything spaghetti cold nice chinese ice cold oh yeah yeah but you gotta put that up and put the rice in the microwave You got a really anime you have to revive the rice. Yes, but everything else I'm with you on that Yeah, pizza and let me say really quickly. I you know, I didn't read the game I didn't put the Boas on or the medallions or anything and try to get bitches but I Will say that I think calling a woman disgusting is going past the point of negging successful

making which is what it's not it's not it's not anything close to a backhanded compliment no he's just openly calling her disgusting and I would also say to Joe he tries to grab for her slice of cold pizza mmm be careful and it's not just with women it's with anybody drunk I have a piece in my hand do not grab this you'll get your fucking hand shoot off. I agree with you. Yeah, don't eat my wife's food either Won't hear the fucking end of it Well, anyway Seeing this night unfold it made made me think that I'm in a goddamn movie Groundhog Day Yeah, well Asia puts gail to bed in

Nathan's bed who is The one in Nathan's bed, who is the one who the glove doesn't fit on. I mean, imagine putting Nicole Brown Simpson's head back on and then giving her back to OJ. Yeah, he heard her. Doesn't make any sense. Are you talking about Nicole Brown Simpson? Talking about both of them. I believe the comparison was very apt, El. One got their head severed off with a trowel. The other one learned that there might be other travel plans. Right. Both hurtful.

I mean, extremely hurtful. What was OJ's name? Orinthal Simpson. Yeah, I mean, I can't believe Orinthal got so upset that night. I think he planned it. Yeah, he brought gloves. Oh, let me not forget my gloves. Oh, let me put them on. What do you think he was going over there for? We got to get into Blake too. Blake? Who's Blake? Robert Blake. Oh, Robert Blake. Because I think he might not have done it. Oh, no, he did it. Oh, yeah, he did it. Well, he went on Dr. Phil and was like, I didn't do it. So I was pretty convincing. Hmm. And for any of the listeners around the world, where Dylan and I record this podcast, you could if you had a feel that yeah, if you get arm on it, you could throw a rock

and hit where he killed that. Yeah, if Aaron Rogers was on ayahuasca, he could probably pick up a skipping rock and hit where he killed that guy. Yeah if Aaron Rodgers was on Iowaski could probably pick up a skipping rock and hit Vitellos. Vitellos, yes. All right so um Gale doesn't want lightning to next day. Oh next morning. Joe wakes up and what do you know it? He thinks Carrie's sound. Mmm I think he was saying that she's just a friend right? Which is I mean everybody friends out everybody can see that that's a lie and that he's going to attempt to bang her in one short evening Gail does not want lightning to strike twice now. I look this up because I was unfamiliar with the term I always thought that and how could you be unfamiliar with that?

Well, I thought lightning strike meant that something good happened. Like, oh, like lightnings can't strike twice, but it is not in that it is lightning strike. It's an event that happens out of the blue, which that makes it could be good or bad. Yeah, that's right. I always thought the connotation was good. Oh yeah. Okay. You know, um, because you definitely dumped his ass. So that wouldn't have been fitting there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know,, you know in Craig County, Virginia is a there's a tree that got struck twice by lightning and It's a haunted field

it's not haunted by any ghosts or anything, but there's a Bull there that survived one of the strikes. He's pissed. I bet. He's mean as hell. So I think he's dead now. But just a complete dick. I mean, when we were kids, we would hop over the barbed wire and try to go take magical bark from the black tree. And this thing would rear its head and charge us down. And it wouldn't get anywhere close because he's so slow

compared to us quick kids. But like, why are you so angry? down. He wouldn't get anywhere close because he's so slow compared to us quick kids but like why so angry? Did the bolt of lightning strike its face and scarred? I think he was just near it. Oh. And speaking of lightning, one more rural animal lightning story. My father had a mule named lightning, the meanest creature I've ever encountered in my entire life. Heard that. Just the meanest bastard hated that thing. All right let's get back to the show. We cut to an interior meeting here, Dill. Yeah. Asha is thrilled that the beads are working. Yeah I got some thoughts on Kermit. Yeah. I like her. It's interesting to see a different part of

her personality where she is starting to hate the Balkan biscuit I hate I have never seen Kermit really lash out and despise someone as much as she she is here I think that like okay, so Ellie is quite an enigma for us because we've spoken to her She's she was lovely when we talked to her on television, she is, I mean she's Al Pacino. I think Ellie in this environment is, she's just not cut out for these environments.

It's just, Ellie is objectively, and she's a big listener, a big fan, but she's objectively awful on the show to Asia and to other people. Well, you know, I think... I don't want to say awful, just weird. Here's what I'll say about the Balkan Biscuit and where this kind of ends up at the tail end of the episode with Kermit having to give it an employee review with four hours left

in the season. Right. Like there's really no reason for this. I mean, I think it was pretty, yeah, there is no reason but Asia was just she'd had she had she pissed so it wasn't that just recently the Balkan biscuit had started power tripping it was I think a lot of as a former podcaster that we work for a lot of twos adding up to a ten right that's five twos that's five twos right but they're all twos you know shame so what is it fool me once shame

on you for me twice hey never shame oh my god you don't get fooled again yeah it's right fool me three times. Shame on you. You're picking on a vulnerable person. I can't remember what Australian comedian did that, but it's such a funny bit. But yeah, imagine if you were fooled five times. I mean, it's snap. So, um, she compliments Ellie's decorations. Well, she pets her like, oh, well, first off, she complements cheese. Yes. She gives her a pat on the head like a golden retriever that you just potty trained. Hey, good job.

And then of course, yes, we do the Balkan biscuits. She gets praised for her decorating skills. You should have seen what she could do with those dead people's clothes and that duct tape. But then she comes around with the right hook and says, you got slow arms though Slow arms fucking ice-cold slow fucking arms that aren't working fast enough And this will send Ellie into one of her I mean we can TM this at this point

I mean, it's just one of her trademark spirals and we head down and You know I I think and we head down and You know, I think through the magic of editing we cut to Ellie who is flabbergasted at Asia's treatment of her but not through the magic of editing Ellie's treatment of wood is something that we have to discuss She doesn't respect wood. Yeah and Asia sees her

poor attempt to clean the wood and or no attempt at all to clean the wood and beckons her down the hallway. Upon seeing Ellie bouncing around shadow boxing in the crew mess. Now Ellie is shadow boxing in the crew mess. Because her words she needs to conserve her energy. Which shadow boxing in the crew mess because, her words, she needs to conserve her energy. Which shadow boxing is just a warm up, but it does require certain energy. The Balkan Biscuit also makes an admission here that she's pretty much given up. Yeah, once you don't give a fuck, this is the type of work that you're going to be putting

out there. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Well, the gays arrive and Asia turns into a a pogo stick of excitement. You know, she's just, she's so excited to see them and they were, they were really fun and sweet. Well, you want to know why they're especially excited though, Dylan, as they point out. They've been on the boat before they're repeat customers but not on this boat. They were on that boat that Previously been used to hunt Shamu and fucking flipper

That's right. They're on that Japanese fishing Yeah, I cannot believe they tried to pass the season off of pillow deck was Lee on that boat No, that was hot captain Hot captain he he should have had his agent at ICM say, you're not putting this captain on that boat. You're not doing it. There is whale blubber that has crystallized and hardened on the hull of the ship. There's literally no solution on planet earth that can get this stuff off. It smells of death and I'm not going to have my client on that boat.

Yeah. But Bravo's a tough negotiator. Absolutely. Hey, by the way, I do want to ask our listeners out there, if we have any Japanese listeners, do you guys really eat dolphins? Don't do that. You fucking idiot. God damn it. I think they do though. No, they don't. Well, I watched this documentary called the Cove where they trap all the dolphins. Yeah, and they say they use the dolphin meat Can I tell you something you can't eat something that can do a backflip on command no Chickens can do it but completely accidentally as Werner Herzog said you have to look into their dead black eyes and you will sense a stupidity the likes of which does not exist anywhere else on

Planet Earth he hates chickens hates chickens Well, maybe not hate perhaps he's just in awe an amazement a detached amazement He said they're prone to hypnosis because they're so stupid and he did it in a film. I Want to be a chicken? Yeah, me too it and he did it in a film. I want to be a chicken. Yeah, me too. Some days I just you know, you get to three o'clock and you go, God damn it. I wish I was just in a coop somewhere. Packing it fucking ticks on my body. Then the McDonald's Corporation shows up and starts ushering you into a fucking

bus. Come on. There you go. You have a lot of mayonnaise slathered on you pretty soon. Oh wow. What's that? Yeah, you have no notion of what that condiment is when you're a chicken. Too stupid. I don't know how you watch the cove. It's so.

Well, you know I'm a doc. Big doc guy. Yeah, and that was one of the early ones It was really done. It was right around the same time as blackfish. Did you see long your legs? Yeah, not yet That's not a doc. That's a horror movie. Are you gonna watch it? Is it on streaming? Yeah, it's on stream I'll watch it tonight. Well, you really well I'm supposed to see boys to men and Paula Abdul at the bowl But I asked the wife to put those tickets on stub hub. I don't want to go. Yeah the bowl but I asked the wife to put those tickets on stub hub I don't want to go yeah cuz you're pretty gay but you're not that gay yeah and I've also

already seen both those performers right very underwhelming what does Paul Abdul do does she just come out and fall face first on this day just her yeah and she's a professional yeah she come comes out and does her six hits just by herself oh she has two backup dancers there's no band or anything like that She's a professional. Yeah, she come comes out and does her six hits just by herself. Oh She has two backup dancers. There's no band or anything like that I really scaled down production and I think she just hammers the check. Yeah, that's why event spaces love Paula, you know Not a lot of equipment. We're just press and play having two people go and dance like idiots behind her and play the hits, Paula. But the HP and then a boys man comes out and a poor is

everyone. But it's death. But it's Paul. So Ellie and Carrie are making and we'll get back to the show. Ellie and Carrie are mixing espresso martinis and we get to some Sea Rat's head skill stuff. Oh, yeah And I want to quickly give a big thank you to baby barnacles Sean. Sean Bergens work is paramount and dedicated This is a reason to go follow our Facebook page another below deck podcast. I'll tell you the barnacles over there. They're having so much fun

Yeah, and I think that he placed Ian's predicament in the correct space. While not being able to see the effective dimensions of this world is sad, you do have to factor in the great privilege and honor being bestowed responsibility of holding universes together. That's right. You know, yeah, the Adams don't just tap anybody to do that. Alright, let me break down the the Sea Rat sad story here. Okay, so yeah, and you mentioned that this kind of bounced off of because Carrie and the Balkan Biscuit were kind of going at it. So Carrie, this is the Sea Rat sad story. Carrie worked on a boat, the owner's wife got sick, Carrie changed her bedpans, who gives a shit zero points. Now, here's how

you level up to a point. Right. Same story. One day the sick wife walked in on you, you know, Carrie and that got husband at hers. Yeah. And he was pounding away at her from behind. Okay. She has a fucking heart attack. She dies on the spot. The implication is that Carrie killed her and that's the sad

story. One point. How do you get to two? Ooh, No, no, no, no. She doesn't die. Okay, but she is almost dying and then the husband and Carrie look down at her like, well, go get a rock. Oh, that turned on.

How do you get to a five? We got to take a quick break to talk about. Bro, buddy. Pat, have you heard about Ozempic? I have, Dillon. I think I want to use it. I do too. You know, just how lovely would it

be to have a quick, efficient, easy way to help you with weight loss? Dylan, I ate a bagel this morning. I can feel my face just got fatter in the last four hours. Yep, and you want to be able to eat your favorite foods. And sometimes you just can't. Today's episode is bought to you by Roe. If you've heard of Ozempic or Wegovi, you've probably heard three things. They're effective, but they're

expensive and they're hard to get. You know, we talked about it. I think, should we talk about Calabasas in West Virginia the way that we did? Probably not. Let's not do that. But it's hard in West Virginia the way that we did? Probably not. Let's not do that. But it's hard to get your hands on this stuff. On Ozempic. A competitor. Right, exactly.

So why use them? Why use them? If you can't find Ozempic or WeGoV, let Ro help. Through Ro, you can access prescription compound GLP-1s with the same weight loss ingredient as a brand name GLP- as a fraction at a fraction of the cost. Rho members have support throughout the entire process. If you're eligible for medication, patients have access to their provider on demand for

any questions. If you're prescribed your medication ships directly to you in one to four days. Go to ro.co. slash below deck. deck membership start at just $99 for your first month medication costs are separate. That's ro.co slash below deck go to row.co slash safety for black box warning and full safety information Compounded medication is not required to and does not receive FDA reviewer approval rx only Mm-hmm. All right, let's get back to it. All right. Where we at? Okay so I think the boat

D-Docs. Okay so this is where the drinking game starts. Actually we already started a while ago. All right so the guy that looks like Ralphie from Christmas Story. He's got a really filthy mouth on him. As the boat pulls out he says, oh wow they pulled out clean. I believe that's a reference to pulling your junk thing out. This is the danger of, I'm grateful that the kid from Christmas story grown up and in a mesh tank top is telling us about the dangers of this. Because you watch porn. And this is, listen.

No one wants someone's breakfast burrito on your way. Exactly. There's egg on this. You know? Got to be careful. But I'm not into the you know the more aggressive or darker stuff in the highways and byways of PornHub or XNXXX or Spank Bank or e-Porn or any of that stuff but you watch some of these home movies or produced films and you

wonder oh people just pull peens out of butts and put them in mouths and it's like no. The kids call that an ATM. It's swipe the credit card that doesn't happen in the real world because it's fucking disgusting. But I mean what a gift though. Yeah yeah I'm glad they're doing their work. Okay nighttime. All right so Nate and Gail, they embrace in the walkway and she states to him that he's

shown his commitment to her. Oh, I'm sorry. No, Nate lets us know he's shown his commitment to her. You know what doesn't have commitment Dylan, his fucking hair, poor bastard, the reboot of Matlock is going to be around longer than his hair I don't know how you have to go there You know cuz younger good-looking guys you gotta be able to mock him I'm old I'm not good-looking anymore It makes me feel good. That's not true. You're very handsome We go through quiet and that was a fucking bait you just threw You threw a little uh

You just threw, you threw a little, and then your throat farted and laugh. It's just, I'm old. It's deplorable behavior what you're trafficking in. I agree, I wanna be better. We go, so we really go through quite a lot of meanwhile shit this episode

and finally get to Fresh Spring Rolls and Double Whammy Minorities. Yeah, let me break this. Yeah we're in the galley with Jono and he shared that working in the yachting industry as we've seen watching the show you're not around a lot of black people and a lot of gay people right in the industry so that's why it's so important for him not to serve a cookie with a scoop of ice cream on it for dessert because that's what a six-year-old would order at Chili's. But he did it. He did, but not to the gays.

Now, he's a badass. He's done well this season. But these spring rolls look like rotten fingers. You know what? Yeah, they do. I didn't even know what they were. I've been watching a lot of Six Feet Under. You know how in these, what do you call them, mortuaries?

They chop everybody's fingers off for the funeral, but you have to put them in formaldehyde, otherwise they rot and purple and look like Jono's fucking spring prime. It's disgusting. Is that right? Yeah. That's why they hid Grammy's hands. Yeah, they chopped all her fingers off. Gross. Yeah, GR OSS. I okay, you know, I don't think that's feeling the community. But we do really roll out all the stops for the first lunch. We got grilled red snapper, spring rolls, turkey, lettuce wrap, soba, no, no new spa. We're going to move on from it. We're going to move on from it.

Well, seafood with some noodles show up and I believe Ralphie said, uh, would you like crabs? Drink. I don't know why everyone doesn't get the queer spread that Jono rolled up, but I get it. I mean, listen, if there were a bunch of Magic, the Gathering fans, I'd crank it up to 11. These are my people. Understood. Somebody says like Ivermaiason.

What is that? I think that clears up a sexually transmitted disease. Remnants of calm or something? A sexually transmitted disease, I believe. Oh, okay. Yeah, you know, those VDs can be quite spicy. Yeah. You know, do I have syphilis or did I have Thai food last night?

You know, sometimes you just don't know. All right. So Joe is tiptoeing around Gale. Jono heads up to get his plot. It's Ellie is sent down to laundry. And when she arrives in laundry the tension is thick. Carrie tells her that she doesn't want to mess up what Bree has going on and because of Ellie being Ellie it is a

I'm gonna take the gloves off. Okay. Okay I'm gonna take the gloves off and we've taken the gloves off the whole season, but because we know Ellie, it's been a little bit tough and the fans are much harder on her. They absolutely are. I've read those Instagram comments. Yeah, let me say this though. Okay, is what she's doing other than being annoying. Is she hurting the service? She's hurting the environment. She's hurting the work environment. No, she's hurting the work environment because every thing can have the possibility of turning into something with Ellie. Carrie just says, Hey, I just don't want to I'm just trying to not fuck up her flow because she's she's golden retriever. You know, we, you can't trip a golden retriever when you're trying to teach it new tricks. This doesn't need to turn into an assault on Ellie's hierarchical power, which everything seems to be able to turn into that very quickly.

And you don't want to work in an environment like that. I mean, Dylan, watching the show as we have over the last eight years though we've had chefs literally throw things at people and try and... Oh Ellie is nothing compared to some of the people that we've had. That's my point. Yeah. Okay. I mean we had a we had a Soviet spy who hated gays and was serving canned corn to people. Yeah, she didn't even wash the the viscosity off of it. She just plopped it on top of nachos. I mean, we had a dude show up with stolen identity.

He was trying to hijack the boat. If that man was allowed to be on that boat, charter one. A little scubby pulls up to the side of it, ruin goes up, punches Sandy in the face and he says, I'm the captain now. I'm quoting from my favorite film Captain Phillips, the inspiration for this criminal activity that I'm embarking on right now. It would have been a nightmare. Let's get to the evening. The theme is Swedish pop music. Ellie is confused, but let me say it's better than a fucking white party. Or a disco night.

Ellie seems to be quite, as the kids would say, fire at table deck. She's like a bugsy, but more paranoid. Let's get to dinner. Stuffed salmon, avocado ribbon, butternut puree. Stuffed salmon is two words that I just really never want to see anywhere. I'm not I I don't like cooked fish. I don't either. I don't like cooked fish either. As I've pointed out on this podcast, everyone knows

if you're an avid listener, you cook fish in a microwave in a common area of a work environment. I'll have sex with someone you know. I'm gonna like it. You don't have any children. But you have a grandma still kicking around. Oh, fuck. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, sir. What are you doing in Evergrade? Was I can't? You know, I was thinking in my mind that you are breaking into a hospice

facility. I'd go there you want to cook some swordfish in a microwave at an insurance company at two in the afternoon Jimmy Carter's getting fucked. Is that your grandpa. Get ready grampy. They got to have lots of lubricant in places like that. Of course they do. Just catheters and stuff like that.

And I know it's a little dark to talk about Pat raping people on their deathbed, but we're just joking around. Yeah. You know who else is joking around? Ralphie from A Christmas Story. When those salmon rolls or whatever the fuck they were that were on our show. He said he loves it when it hits the back of his throat. And listen, I want to amend my hatred of cooked fish. You know, I'm sure if I went to Eric Repairs joint, you know, I'm sure that, you know, a snapper or a brandzina with some kind

of perfect emulsion and artichoke hearts that have been cured with something would be delicious. Now you'd amend that for fried fish right? Yeah but like why am I eating fried fish when I can have fried chicken? Why would I ever have a fish stick when I can have a chicken tender? Scoundrel from the Queen of Versailles as you know is labeled chicken for poor people. Yeah, you're better than that. Are you no, I'm not For LA standards, I'm poor You know, that's why me and Pat are announcing that we are moving to Charlottesville, Virginia The place where all the tiki torches were but we hear it's nice now The riff-raff really got cleared out of that place

They don't even sell tiki torches anymore. Ah damn. I know. I always wanted an old one. Ah damn. You've always wanted to hold one, huh? Tiki torch, right? You know, it's so funny. We are, a friend was getting married and or engaged and we were setting up the surprise at one of my friend's houses and what the groom wanted was a line of tiki torches that they could walk through to get to the place where he would make me feel like I'm in Honolulu, right and We did a behind-the-scenes video of the setup, you know Just us goofing around and stuff like that and in the video and I had forgot that I did this But I picked up two of the tiki torches during the setup and I said the Jews will not replace us the Jews will not replace Us and so that was a good memory for them Okay, so Joe and Carrie are pals tiki torches during the setup and I said the Jews will not replace us the Jews will not replace us

and so that was a good memory for them. Okay so Joe and Carrie are pals, we're just mates, my eyes are going to go 360 into the back of my head down to my butthole and back when they hook up I mean it just missed me with the bullshit. So Aisha gives a command over the radio and Ellie gives a command of her own It's the clearing of the table not yet, okay Asia is furious at this point and is going to snuff out Ellie's candle You know But the final course we have to get to ribeye and celery puree Of course we have to get to ribeye and celery puree, celeriac puree, celery root puree essentially. It's sloppy plating with a bleeding heart,

but how could that taste bad? Seven pots. So Gale and Nathan, at this point I just do not care. I can't, let us know in the comments if you are invested in Gale and Nathan's love. Yeah. Is there any couple on below deck that we've really cared for? I think Jess and the hot angular guy were they were just so hot that it was it was, you know, that didn't go anywhere. No, no,

no, I think he cheated on her. Yeah, no, the no, the answer's no. No, the answer's no. So let's get to the dance party. Nathan is in a onesie, very cute, but he's kind of just standing in the background over there doing nothing over there, and he talks about his gran. She sounds like a real fucking homophobe, eh?

Mm-hmm. Said he'll be denounced, excommunicated from his last name. Oh, wow. Jesus fucking Christ. Old people really get crotchety. Well, they're from another time, Delia. Yes, they are. Yeah, you know, when she was bouncing around,

they weren't allowed places. Wow, there was only three of them on the planet, and they were weird. Okay, so next day. Next morning. Asia has gone from talking about shoving shit up her ass to talking about shoving shit up her ass while helping Sandy plan her engagement. And that's growth.

Now call me crazy, but when she sits with Captain Sandy and asks, as any friend would, hey, I want to help put this together. Do you have any requests? You expect them to say, you know, just however you'd like to do it, I'd like it to be here with this. Sandy, it's almost like she'd, she had quite the list. She's a captain. She's a captain. She's very detail oriented. And when I say Asia shoving shit up her ass, I'm not pulling that out of nowhere.

The clip was of her saying when she was a kid she shoved up. Even she grossed out Sandy back then. Yeah, Sandy. Before they were friends and lived near each other. Exactly. All right, so good spread for breakfast. bacon chocolate protein pancakes good spread not the last breakfast I feel like the last coup de gras the last a.m. Coup de gras will be some kind of shellfish Benedict right

Dylan it's worth pointing out I believe and of course we'll have to get to some of our experts that have been following us following the seasons of below deck Is this the first and only season where someone has not been fired? No one has no fired this season now Captain Glenn on the first season of sailing did not fire someone there was a guy named Parker who was a fucking lunatic Parker who quit Yeah But I believe we've kept the same cast that was such a weird season Parker and Glenn Parker Glenn you

had Georgia Georgia who I think is coming back on the show we'll get to hear more of her acoustic musings oh but then there was the the Bozen and his girlfriend that's right who had been living with Glenn and we're It's just a weird thing going on. Anyways, we're going on journeys today. Nathan and Brie get to adventure Champagne is what Sandy wants including a violinist and flowers We talked about that but we head to the temple and Nathan gets to step. Nope Ian gets to step into his actual role as an entertainer Right yeah, because you don't really need to see anything to entertain

You know you just need to look look up a place on Google, and they just regurgitate Unchecked facts about it. He gives a marvelous tour This was the prototype of for the Acropolis. I don't know if that's true. You know, he's a regular old Marty Short. But he's doing very good. Kind of a lot more meanwhile shit. Ellie thrives in giving orders.

Oh, yeah, the Balkan Biscuit, Bossing Carry Around. Now, this is where we have a new term for our podcast, which I like, and I think it's going to stick. We have a dictator, which is referred to. So let's- Who came up with that? Is that you? That was Carrie.

Carrie came up with it. I'm gonna use it, a dictator. That's what I'm gonna have a bossy person on the boat. You're a dictator. I love that. Yeah, no, Ellie is for sure a dictator. She's talking tape, she's talking air compressors. She is the chief still.

And Asha talks to Kerry about all this. Now, is this dime dropping? It's dime dropping. She's trading in that inappropriate behavior that she claimed that she did not like or wanted to partake in. But here we are. I think it's reasonable dime dropping.

I mean, we've got a dictator up there. Well, think about it just from, there's literally four hours left on the season. Why, Bob? Let's get to dinner. Joe is thinking about whipping his cock out. We are here, we are queer. Yeah, yeah.

We get to a very busy plate of caprese salad with grilled pus. Caprese salad is something that, you're damned if you do, damned if you don't. If you roll out a clean Caprese, which is what Caprese should be, it's Caprese salad. You've slopped mozzarella and tomatoes and basil on a plate. But if you dress it up like this, you just come off like an insane person. I mean, are you putting like some kind of salsa verde and octopus on this plate with this? I mean it's just absolutely crazy. It's criminal. We then... Oh this is clearing tables gate. This is

clearing tables gate. This is the last straw that broke. Oh well you missed a Christmas story moment. Oh what was the Christmas story? Sp Christmas spices always in the back never in the front? Drink drink But yes, John O'Clearing John O'Clearing now the only the thing that really Made me go over the edge and think that Ellie's just not suited for this and that she's too weird and paranoid for this kind Of work is Asia saying she's never done this one time the entire season Ellie is in a manic deck tutorial mode right now so she's saying Jono clearing that's not your responsibility at all you're getting

high on your deck tutorial fumes hmm you know? And so Asia confronts her. This is, this not only is a tough moment between Ellie and Asia, it's a tough moment for Ellie and the audience because they rolled back the tape on Ellie's entire litany of crimes. You know, O.J. just chopped the head off of two people with a trowel. It didn't get caught on tape.

Didn't get caught on tape. And that's why you can't acquit. Jump in the iTunes ratings, reviews, five stars, kind words, join us at patreon.com slash another podcast network. Don't need a little or a little bit more. Follow us everywhere on social media. Check us out on YouTube. We love you guys very much. I'm Dylan saying goodbye. Pat, say goodbye. Later dudes! much I'm Dylan saying goodbye, Pat say goodbye! LATER DUDES! Love