Anything Better? - Luxury Four Seat Fishing Rafts

Episode Date: September 24, 2022

Is there Anything Better than Bill & Paul talking about being vindicated, fishing in comfort, and Charlie Murphy. Beard Club: Grow your best beard today and take 20% off your first order when you... go to BeardClub.com/BETTER and use code better Thuma: Go to Thuma.co/BETTER to receive a twenty-five dollar credit towards your purchase of The Bed plus free shipping in the continental U.S. Helix: Helix is offering up to 200 dollars off all mattress orders AND two free pillows for our listeners. Go to HelixSleep.com/BETTER Better Help: When you want to be a better problem solver, therapy can get you there. Visit BetterHelp.com/ANYTHINGBETTER today to get 10% off your first month.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 here we go what's up everybody and welcome back to another episode of your favorite podcast it's the anything better podcast with your hosts bill bur Burr, Paul Berzy, and our producer, Andrew Themlis, out there in Beverly Hills. And today, you guys are listening to episode number 69. Who do we got, guys? 69 numbers. All right, number 69, you have Jared Allen. Nice 2000 player. 2004 to 2015, 187 game, 136 sacks paul six interceptions 19 fumble recover was five
Starting point is 00:00:51 time provost selection for first time all-time tied for nfl record with four career safeties and then in baseball you got the 2004 redx champion Bronson Arroyo, 2006 All-Star, 2010 Gold Glove winner. He played from 2000 to 2014 and came back briefly in 2017. So the man has an MLB pension. And I think that's it. I don't know if there's anybody else here. John Runyon.
Starting point is 00:01:24 John Runyon. John Runyon. There you go. There's another guy. Runyon was an animal, yeah. Yeah. And you guys know what happens with 69 when you reverse the number. When you turn it over, it's 69 again. Sorry.
Starting point is 00:01:38 I thought it was 96. Mark Sklereth. That's that guy on ESPN. Yeah. Oh, Andrew Desjardins the jardins as they say out here is uh hockey willie young 66 to 75 woody peoples here's some old school names here's some old school names Chester Pitts, Mike
Starting point is 00:02:06 Lewis, not a lot of names in this book Jordan Mercer currently active for the Pirates oh here's one for you Paul 1960-1968 with a cop haircut Cheryl Hedrick alright I think we're done here
Starting point is 00:02:22 um what are the most famous three-name athletes you could remember? Three names. I'm trying to think. As you said, as you said. What do you mean? Like Louis Gossett Jr.? Mario Van Peebles?
Starting point is 00:02:41 Van Peebles is his last name. That's not three syllables? Oh, van people so i wasn't mario van peoples like mario peoples it's mario van peoples uh dominic rogers cromarty he was a good defensive back for the cardinals and the giants uh oh oh there's. Oh, there's a running back. There was a running back. Oh, Jason Pierre-Paul. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. Nice. Oh, that's the winner so far.
Starting point is 00:03:14 I saw a highlight of Will Chamberlain blocking his skyhook twice in a row. Same play. Wow. And people said you can't, you know, for a long time people were like, why doesn't somebody else develop that shot? You can't defend against it, which is true unless you look at that highlight
Starting point is 00:03:35 and it's Will Chamberlain. But it's also Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. So I don't think, I'm willing to say in his career he never took back-to-back sky hooks on the same trip down the court. And somebody blocked both of them other than that one time with Will. No, that's that's amazing, dude. Dude, that's Will Chamberlain never gets talked about. Rarely, I should say. Rest his soul.
Starting point is 00:03:58 Will Chamberlain rarely gets talked about as greatest center ever. I think he does. I always hear Russell and Kareem always in the argument first. Yeah, now so, but when I was a kid. Okay, yeah, yeah. You know, things go by. You know how you guys are. You're like, oh, the Beatles stink, right?
Starting point is 00:04:24 I mean, after a while, it's just like, hey, the guy scored 100 points in a game, but they only won one championship. I mean, Steve Kerr has more rings than this fucking guy. I mean, it's just one half. Richard Pryor, black guys do this, white guys do that. I mean, it's just what happens. It is a time thing. That's very very
Starting point is 00:04:45 true yeah he did not stand the test of time well and there's been a couple of guys who kind of fucking you know you know sports writer guys that shit on him saying about you know i don't know i don't know i mean how do you shit on a guy who scores 100 points i don't give a fuck if he is ball hogging yeah no i i think the knock the knock on wilt was those uh those black and white pictures of like white guys up to his dick like look like you go to a kindergarten game and you start fucking with kids he would literally do this no what got him was bill russell yeah so bill russell was getting the rings and he had the stats. It was kind of like early Peyton Manning, Tom Brady, where Peyton Manning had these gaudy stats and Brady was getting the rings.
Starting point is 00:05:34 But then Peyton crucially came back and got that second ring with a different team when he could have gone to the stacked 49ers and gotten a layup. But instead, he went to the Broncos and earned it like a man. That's why nobody fucks with him now, I feel. Speaking of Peyton Manning, they were showing – I've never watched the Manning cast, but apparently there's a TV show where Eli and Peyton watch Monday Night Football.
Starting point is 00:06:02 They call the game, and they have guests on. So this week, they had Saquon on after the giants win. They had Shannon sharp and then they're watching the game and fucking another coaching move. That was kind of a blunder by the Broncos is they had 40 seconds left and he's going like this. Peyton's going Eli, Eli, doesn't he got it? And Eli's going, yeah, dude, they're not even said he goes, Sutton does.
Starting point is 00:06:25 He was talking about the receiver. He goes, yeah, dude, Sutton's not settled. And? And Eli's going, yeah, dude, they're not even said. He goes, Sutton does. He was talking about the receiver. He goes, yeah, dude, Sutton's not settled. And Peyton's just going like this. Dude, dude. And they just started like, Peyton's going like this. And then they called it at 20 seconds. And then Shannon Sharp was the guest. And he goes, did they just burn 20 seconds and then call a timeout?
Starting point is 00:06:41 And like Peyton was doing it. And then Peyton just goes, as soon as it happened, he just goes. It was like, you could tell he was like, I was just growing up watching a football game over the Mannings. It's like, I like those guys, but it's just,
Starting point is 00:06:55 everybody knows so much. I just feel like I can't say anything when I'm over there. That's so hard. She comes walking in with like an ice pack on his lower back he's out that week for the Saints and you're just kind of sitting there Peyton you gonna introduce me to your friend there his mother's like don't bother your father
Starting point is 00:07:15 his knees are killing him this is Billy Burry lives down the street oh yeah you play ball well yeah I mean I'm in the street but not like you guys i throw it around a little bit no it was cool though man to see peyton going like no no dude dude it was like you could just tell the guy is just so like in tune how cool would it be sitting next to him at a game and he was breaking and he was like, yeah, dude, here's what's going on.
Starting point is 00:07:48 You're just like, oh, dude, why aren't you playing right now? It's fucking incredible. He'd be a great coach, dude. He'd be a great coach. Yeah, he would. I think he'd be great. I like him now in retirement, but I don't like any of those Colts. I don't like any of those fucking Colts. The fucking whining and
Starting point is 00:08:04 bitch moaning and complaining they used to do against the fucking Patriots. I'll never forgive that franchise ever. Fuck all of them. Not really. I'm not really saying fuck Peyton Manning. I'm just saying the fucking whining. I get it. And the tapes and the investigations.
Starting point is 00:08:20 And the jealousy, Bill. The jealousy. I know. And then you turn around and they do. And they were doing some of the worst shit ever. They got caught cheating so many fucking times. But for some reason, you know what it is, Paul? It's the middle of the country, Paul.
Starting point is 00:08:35 And they just put them pants on one leg at a time. And nobody gives a fuck. You can literally fuck a pig in the middle of a fucking highway in the middle of the country and the fucking the liberal media is that it's not going to pick it up unless you have on a maga hat and you're gonna be sitting there eating an ice cream and they'd figure out something that you did wrong they just don't give a fuck uh when you really think about what the san antonio spurs did they might as well have done that in portugal like you want to talk about it's just like it didn't happen in a big media market nobody cares dude the level of boss hog cheating ass
Starting point is 00:09:24 game and shit horse shit that the indianapolis Colts did while they were calling us out for doing the same fucking thing that they were doing. But it was the middle of the country, Paul! Yeah. They got them family values out there, Paul! You know what that reminds me of? You know what that reminds me of? That Milwaukee Bucks championship where Giannis Antetokounmpo had 50 points in that closing game, that game seven, where he just went off. That was one of the most undeniable NBA championship game performances. Not a sexy city, Paul.
Starting point is 00:09:58 Yeah, it's true. that untold on donahue and every mother thing that i was saying i felt was going on in the 2000s right through to right now that i am watching assisted reality yeah the way they let certain players go to some teams and not other they got the whole thing worked out not literally who's gonna win but who's gonna give us the most ratings and the most fucking money in our pocket they're getting the fucking calls i mean that happens to a certain extent with star players and everything but i'm just saying what was going on when they fucking acted like he was the only guy fixing games i immediately the first thing i said was like how long can i be shaving points paul and you're on the team with me before you're like bill what's going on with you two games yes it's a fucking joke and here's the other thing when
Starting point is 00:10:51 there are three officials for an nba game the other two guys they see a habit going on dude come on come on and i i really believe stern rest his soul was filthy if me you and Andrew Themlis were doing an NBA game and you were Donaghy one of us at halftime would be like dude Bill is there something we should Paul I'm not shaving points without letting you in on it you're my boy
Starting point is 00:11:18 exactly we're all going to steak and shake after this buddy Bill can I get a little scratch from this What's going on That's fucking great Paul this is what we do We'll fix one game a month
Starting point is 00:11:34 They're not going to notice As long as we're on the up and up One game a month We get fucking paid We'll just have Thameless puts it in Thameless goes to Vegas We just get him a linen fucking paid yeah they're not paying us enough we'll just have themilus puts it in all right that most goes to vegas you know we just get him a linen a linen outfit you know matching top so
Starting point is 00:11:52 he looks like a fucking whale yeah we'll go in and we'll take care we'll take care of one dude fuck these guys man they're all making fucking this guy's on the bench paul they're making fucking more money we'll have seen a lifetime come on yeah yeah that's wild dude dude it's utah versus the pelicans nobody's watching this dude that yeah dude that's that yeah he's not the only one that's amazing oh dude when we go out to the west coast we're up in portland if they're bad that year the whole east coast the midwest they're asleep paul they're not even watching the fucking game oh dude that was said that was fucking sick can i tell you this paul what about before espn well then you didn't even see those fucking
Starting point is 00:12:35 highlights oh god yeah dude that documentary of the player that his bookie friend goes dude just don't win the guy that was supposed to be the number one pick in the NBA draft and he ruined his career because the FBI found out. They go, yeah, dude, you could win. Just don't win by eight. Or you know what I mean? Most easily fixed to manipulate. My buddy just told me, New York guy. He goes, there's a book that came out about the New York Knicks in 1989 about them throwing games because they owed money to drug dealers.
Starting point is 00:13:07 What? Exactly. What? They just act. Everybody acts like it's not happening. It's like with Fox News and CNN. They'll go after a comedian in a minute. They're not going to go after big pharmaceutical.
Starting point is 00:13:22 They're not going to go after the fucking guys that turned our food supply into poison. They're not going after that. They're not going to go after big pharmaceutical. They're not going to go after the fucking guys that turned our food supply into poison. They're not going after that. They're not going to bite the hand that feeds. So the NBA is the hand that feeds. So they're going to do the rogue fucking guy. Daniel Stern was this visionary that built the league and da-da-da-da-da
Starting point is 00:13:40 and all of that shit. David. David. Whatever his fucking name is.iel stern was the actor in home alone i know he was you're right uh should have let me go with that because then people could do the you would be the you would be the worst guy like that with daniel stern glasses on i mean david stern glasses on yo andrew i just pictured if bill got caught like and the fbi was and bill's like all right dude i'm gonna fucking just keep me out of the fucking jail i'm gonna sing you just start even getting the other guy's names wrong yeah if i couldn't rat out on people if i wanted to i can't remember
Starting point is 00:14:15 their names the fbi guy would be confused you go wait who and then you would just you know mickey jordan he plays for for the Chicago Blackhawks. One of those fucking Chicago teams. I can't remember. I'm done with the NBA, Paul. I know. I watch it because the athletes are so good. But I'm done with this whole stupid fucking trying to pay attention.
Starting point is 00:14:44 Oh, my God. Are the Lakers going to pass the Celtics? This is the thing, Paul. so good but i'm done with this whole stupid fucking trying to pay attention oh my god are the lakers gonna pass the celtics this is the thing paul if you're writing this script of course the lakers get 18 before the celtics do because the celtics held the record for the longest that's more interesting and then it's like oh the celtics gonna fuck the better and you watch they'll let us load up again like that bullshit big three thing that they let us do yeah there's no business like show business like no business i know but you know what i that's why the nfl season is here and you just go there you have your beers and you get fucking hammered andrew speaking of of that, Paul, was there a better weekend?
Starting point is 00:15:27 I don't think I ever ate so many Tums and had heartburn. That time we went to LSU, Alabama on Saturday, spent a whole Sunday in New Orleans acting like we still had gigs and then waited until the Monday night Saints versus Eagles. That was amazing. That was one of my fondest memories of going to a game with you. And another one of my fondest memories going to a game with you is when we sat in the car in front of that house because the residential people let you.
Starting point is 00:15:55 It was LSU. Yeah, and me and you sat there. And I think it was Michelob Lights. Was it Michelob Lights? And we just got hammered on Michelob Lights. No, we also had we had we had uh we had something hard too we had the mickelob lights that's the first beer i ever got hammered on and that's the only city i know where they still sell it because that stupid mickelob
Starting point is 00:16:14 ultra so we're drinking mickelob mickey lights in front of somebody's house right there in baton rouge oh and everybody just lets you park on their lawn and in front. And then when it's time to go, you walk. Me and Bill are drinking these. Me and Bill are drinking these Michelob lights. But, Bill, speaking of getting drunk. Remember that old-timer? The old-time Southern guy?
Starting point is 00:16:35 The LSU fan turns around to the Alabama section. He goes, around the hole and down the bowl. Roll, Todd, roll. Yes, I do remember that. You lost it. And we started throwing a football with them. But, Bill, we got something really funny that I saw that I sent to Andrew. And I said, Andrew, me and Bill got to play this on anything better.
Starting point is 00:16:58 This is a grandmother drinking at the Cincinnati Bengals game. And that's all I'll say. I love it. Let's see. I still think that guy using a hot dog as a straw was brilliant. That was one of the most disgusting things I've ever seen. It is. It's something you should have done in private but i understand it the the
Starting point is 00:17:27 the hot dog juice with the drink though that's that's where i get sick i mean come on paul yeah yeah you're doing this you're fucking drinking you're eating the hot dog goes good together ah nah i need the beer and then that feeling and then the hot dog. I can't have the juices together. Hey, what can I tell you? I'm more of an animal than you are. You got to speak in an animal. I mean, when I saw that, all I wanted to hear was real man of genius. I get it, though.
Starting point is 00:18:00 It was. Oh, dude, speaking of baseball, Aaron Judge has 57 now. Oh, watch this. Here we go. Oh, God, watch out for the kid. Dude, that's all beer, too. The second one is when she just goes... You know what's funny?
Starting point is 00:18:35 You know it's still cold. You see, the guy actually looked. He saw it. He saw it coming out. I'll be honest with you, dude. She held it together pretty good. She's dressed for it. She knew what she was doing.
Starting point is 00:18:53 All right, let's stop watching this. This is gross. I give her credit, dude. She hung in there. She just... The second one... She's been drinking like that since kenny anderson was their quarterback you have any concerts she's seen at that place i mean that's her that's her
Starting point is 00:19:15 go-to shit right there yeah she's had that steep for a long time yeah she had a guy next to paul brown the guy the guy next to her just goes it just went right back i loved it i mean what do you do nah i'll be honest with you that would that didn't even gross me out that seemed like water coming out of her it wasn't even like i've seen way worse ones at football i remember a long time ago we were fucking drinking in the woods you know fucking kids being idiot and there was a buddy of, like he could shotgun a beer faster than anybody else. He just was insane. He just went, he was like, he just goes, it's coming back up.
Starting point is 00:19:56 The beer was in the can in him and on the ground and about fucking 2.5 seconds. We were fucking dying laughing. Dude, I, uh, I told you my stepfather told me this thing that they did in the Navy. And I almost got really, really hurt from doing it. But he goes, yeah, it's a gallon of water. He goes, I used to do it with milk and nobody could ever do it. But it's a gallon of water in a half hour without throwing up or puking. You'll die.
Starting point is 00:20:21 And I, dude, my buddy, yeah, did you fucking. So I was at a p did you fucking so i was at a pizzeria i worked at a pizzeria and the two owners were there and i'm talking about it and i go yeah dude i started shaking i had to make myself throw up like i timed it perfectly blah blah and the guy goes fuck you versi dude i'll fucking do that and no are you you fuck he goes i'll bet you a hundred dollars and i go i go no dude you can't do it i go you'll get he goes this fucking guy he goes you fucking get it and then he goes next door and he comes with a gallon of milk and i go i mean a gallon of water and i go all right this guy's name was johnny and he goes i go johnny don't don't do it man i was like it's not cool and he just goes you fuck he's laughing
Starting point is 00:20:58 at me and he fucking takes the money out he goes you literally they're laughing making fun of me so he takes it slugs one right he just goes fucking guys an idiot right thanks to he gets to like a quarter of it and he just goes all right all right he's just he took another one and he he threw it down and now the gallon is halfway done and he did it way too quick within like eight minutes, six minutes. He had it down. He just goes, he goes, you're an asshole. And he lunges towards the bathroom and his hand went out. And when we called him a water fountain, his hands went out like this. And it just upstream.
Starting point is 00:21:38 He's lucky. He's lucky. Yeah. No woman died doing that on a radio contest. Cause they didn't understand what they were doing. I mean, I of it either like some you you drink too much water like it somehow breaks down the lining of your cells or something like that which i don't know what that does but it's not good for you and she died trying to win like a playstation for a kid oh my god yeah no dude but it is watching somebody the the funniest thing about throwing up is the two seconds before they do for me.
Starting point is 00:22:08 It's just it's the it's it's it starts swallowing. Start. That's a good one, too. And they go, have you ever heard of sounds? I like you. Like, I i'm not gonna lie to you like what sounds what do you mean well you know i've heard like family members and my wife when they're really sick i feel bad for them but the noises they make in the bathroom they make me laugh like when you said somebody's just going like you know you're like you you know you got nothing left and you just start going like like doing that shit it's echoing in there it just
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Starting point is 00:32:57 Well, I've always been so hammered. I can't remember where. I had one on a class trip. I had one when they were given a sightseeing tour and I was laying in the fucking grass on this bluff. Down on the Cape. What do you mean? What do you mean? A bluff.
Starting point is 00:33:18 I don't know what you call it. It was like long grass that was leading down the side of a cliff towards the ocean and me my buddy who drove drank so much during the day it was like the middle of the day and we were just completely passed out and i started to come around because i was getting sick and i heard this little boy say mom why is that man laying down there why is that man sleeping down and i got up and i just went oh fucking yacked and just how old were you uh like 20 21 i was i mean i was a man to that kid but i was a kid i was stupid why is that man then i also remember we got a flat and i was hammered and i put the jack i didn't have it under the frame and his floorboards and went through the bottom of his car
Starting point is 00:34:12 it was a mess of a day uh i put the wrong i put the jack on the car in the wrong place and bent the frame once because i didn't know what the fuck I was doing and I didn't want to tell anybody. You didn't bent the frame. You bent something attached or something. Yeah, you can't bend the frame. You're supposed to put it on the frame. Yeah, the thing in the middle. You know, like I was too far towards the middle of the car
Starting point is 00:34:38 and I just started to see a bend and the guy's like, oh, you need help. Dude, you want to talk about now? The exhaust pipe? The cop was like, dude, I can't really help you, help dude you want to talk about the exhaust pipe the cop was like dude i can't really help you but you're gonna have to get like he like was kind of like telling me what to do it was brutal man yeah i didn't i did i was fucking hammered and then it was also it was a piece of shit car so it came with those one of those jacks that was like this big and then he had like that old timey crank yeah the thing was thing was I wasn't hammered. That's the, I wasn't, I still do it right now.
Starting point is 00:35:10 If I had a flat right now and I was on my own completely sober, it would be, I'd get it done, but it would be a, it would be a real long process as sad as it is to say, dude, I can't change my own oil as sad as that is to say, wouldn't know how to do it. I'll be honest with you. I don't think I've ever looked under the hood of my car because you just get them serviced now. Once a year they go in. So like I would have to do I would have to get the manual out to make sure.
Starting point is 00:35:39 That, you know, whatever dipstick I was pulling out, you know, obviously you would see oil, but I would still be like, I don't trust this. Dude, if I tried changing my own oil, I'd look like one of those ducks after a fucking Exxon oil spill. Like I would be fucking, I would just be completely. Well, the thing is, there's no way to get underneath the cars anymore. The cars like sit on the ground and then you open it up and just every it's just it looks like la where it's just just like i don't know what half this is there's all kinds of computer chips i'm afraid of them on my old truck i could do it no problem i can literally
Starting point is 00:36:17 i open the hood of my truck and i look down and i can still see the driveway like looking down into the thing the only thing about my F-100, the reason why I don't do it is because there was like a design flaw where the oil pan sits there and where you untwist it, the frame is right underneath it. So if it hits it, it goes all over the place. Like I've watched them at Jiffy Lube do it. They have like this giant spout that comes out and then they have like this big drain and then they take like a uh a hole they got a hose off the frame to get rid of all the oil that spills all over it's just how they designed it but i used to the thing about changing your tire was you needed uh you needed a good jack
Starting point is 00:36:56 and you needed a breaker bar that was the thing just to get those things off i remember a long time ago doing a stand-up gig this other piece of shit pickup truck that i had i got a flat on the driver's side on like fucking the highway and that's like how you die at night and i got out i had that thing fucking changed in about 10 minutes because i already had my spare tire i had it in the bed because i didn't want it underneath the truck because that little housing thing was shitty metal and it would rust out after the bolt would rust on it was like i'm not gonna be sitting here trying to get this fucking thing on the side of the road so i had i and i like and i had a professional jack like a real one not you know i mean like a fucking real one
Starting point is 00:37:41 professional jack cars up i mean i had a real one not that because the bullshit one that i had like literally was like you know part of it was like under the hood you open your hood and unbolt it and take this little fucking tree stand out i got that one that went up like that then when you turn it it came down nice and slow i got one of those and i had this big breaker bar for the uh to get the bolts off and that and the big thing was you just loosened them while the tire was still on the ground then you jacked it up and went the rest of the way off on got them back on lower it down and then fucking crank them and jump back in your truck before some drunk driver hit you yeah jesus
Starting point is 00:38:22 dude your your f your f-150s just a mean looking beaut it's a fucking 100 yeah they didn't have the 150 yet but then yeah it's a fucking the front of it is fucking beautiful man i was looking at some cars i'm waiting it's great grandsons coming in january i told you i ordered a f-250 a 2023 oh. Oh, you ordered it? Yeah. Oh, shit. I didn't know you pulled the trigger. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:50 Oh, shit. It's so stupid. No, man. No, it's not. You know what? It's going to be great, and it's going to, because I'm not going to work the way I've been working, Paul. I miss my kids too much, and I'm just, I don't give a shit.
Starting point is 00:39:07 I just don't i and i i know that if i just you know don't work as much but i still do quality quality is what people hopefully keeps people coming to your shows but like yeah i want to uh yeah like i have a lot of shit that i have not done for 30 fucking years look at this shit dude i love football more than anybody and i haven't been able to watch any games so i don't i mean what what's the point of doing that no it's all yeah just keep going to the next level the next level the next level i've made enough fucking money i got two beautiful kids and a great wife got a beautiful house the fuck am i doing what are you doing yeah no dude i'm looking at a i was looking at a boat me and the watergate hotel paul what am i doing here i mean who doing? Yeah, no, dude, I'm looking at a, I was looking at a boat. Me and Lucas are looking at a boat. I'm in the Watergate Hotel, Paul.
Starting point is 00:39:45 What am I doing here? I mean, who am I? No, dude, me and Lucas are looking at a boat. We're going to buy a fishing, but like a, like a, like a little fishing boat that you go out on, on like the, on the reservoirs and the lakes and shit. Well, what do you mean, dude? It's fucking awesome. I'll send you a picture.
Starting point is 00:40:01 I'm saying that's fucking great. Oh, oh, I thought you were like, no, I'm going to judge you. judge you and buy my second pickup truck it can barely change a light bulb but you want to laugh stacy goes paul what are you doing she saw google search you ready for this i put luxury like luxury four-seat fishing rafts or or like boats and and nobody's ever put luxury you're either going out on a joy ride trying to bang your side piece on a boat or you're going fishing she goes paul there's no luxury she goes you just get one you go fishing it's a four-seater and i go no no you could get like leather it's comfortable if you sit down and she's just like yeah but the money you might as well get a fucking big boat i'm like no no we're gonna
Starting point is 00:40:49 get a small fishing boat i want it to be comfortable but then i yeah it's it's i mean there's not many luxury raps yeah wait you're gonna take it out on one of those lakes up there huh uh reservoir reservoir lake i'm getting all the fishing permits and stuff like that dude i gotta be honest man we went fishing on vacation it was so fucking cool man i cut we cut it up they gave i got four fillets from this fluke and then we fought i cooked it that night they so what they do is i gotta you have to have so when you go fishing and you get a charter boat i got a charter boat and they were like oh oh, with other people. I go, no, no, we're not.
Starting point is 00:41:26 It's going to be us on a boat. I fucking got a captain and it's just us. Right. So we go out and in order, in order. No, because, you know, you could do it like, oh, I'm fishing private. I'm fishing private. Not this commercial shit. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:38 It's seven o'clock in the morning. It's going to be me and the people that I fucking love. And that's it. So he goes, listen, he goes, the fish you catch, go back in if it's not a keeper. And he goes i fucking love and that's it so he goes listen he goes the fish you catch go back in if it's not a keeper and he goes a keeper 17 inches or longer and i got one i got a fluke that was 17 and a half and he goes oh this is a keeper and he fucking dude i actually got a bit out of it because he threw the thing in a fucking cooler because we still had half the day and while i'm casting out this thing's fucking flopping around in there it's just like i'm like when does this stop it was like it's
Starting point is 00:42:10 like fucking billy bats in the back of the but that's what's good yeah it's hilarious that's what's good about it though i open it you respect the fact that you're taking a life and then you're going to want to use the whole thing if you actually kill the thing that you're eating well i said to him i go listen man like he goes i go you're going to want to use the whole thing. If you actually kill the thing that you're eating. Well, I said to him, I go, listen, man, like he goes, I go, you're going to cut it up. And he goes, it would be funny if you did, but I'm gonna, so we're done. And we only get one keeper. We caught 13 fish out of the 13 fish. Only one was 17 inches or longer.
Starting point is 00:42:44 So dude, they, they, they sideways cut the head off. They open the middle. They do the whole thing. What was really fucked up, dude, it was all clean head off. They open the middle. They do the whole thing. What was really fucked up, dude, it was all clean white fish when he took it out. He put it in a Ziploc bag. Then he just takes what's left of the carcass. And without even thinking, dude, he just, like, throws it in. And, like, all these birds came. Dude, it was really, like, I felt fucking bad for the end of that thing's life.
Starting point is 00:43:06 But we went home, and I got four big fillets of this fluke.ke for anybody that doesn't know flounder and fluke are the same thing it's basically different season so in the summer they call it fluke and when you get one in the winter they call it flounder but they're basically they lay on the bottom and both of their eyes are on the same side and dude it's really a delicious fish so then i put lemon salt pepper a little bit of capers flipped it over dude three minutes and fucking everybody took a bite and was like holy shit so i'm in dude i'm in i'll tell you this whoever said booze and boats don't mix never drank on a boat yeah yeah but i do booze and boating completely mixed that's the problem yes cars and booze cars and booze it's like drinking and driving is not fun drinking and boating is a fucking blast. Yeah, you could get busted for both. Oh, no, yeah, you shouldn't do it.
Starting point is 00:44:07 I'm just joking because it doesn't mix. It's like, oh, yeah, it does. It absolutely does. And that's why you have to make this statement because it's like. Oh, dude, what's his? Do you ever see what's his name? What's his name? It's just so stupid and over the top.
Starting point is 00:44:21 Jeff Bezos has like a 200 million dollar yacht that literally looks like a cruise ship but when you look at it it's like a luxurious hotel it's like it's like too much dude it's like it's just it's it's i mean it's ridiculous but uh what do you do with that being nice for an afternoon that's a crazy waste of money 200 million dollars on a fucking boat it's you know i guess it's relative all relative if you have 200 billion right you know it's like no it isn't i i couldn't you could could you buy if you had 200 billion dollars could you spend 200 million on a boat for yourself no no if i wouldn't pay more than yeah i mean i would no i would buy like a
Starting point is 00:45:08 fucking 20 foot yacht like a 20 foot yacht for like 400 grand something like that and that's just a fun thing to go off go fishing and stuff but like you know i mean that guy's got spaceships dude it's like oh shit look at that fucking helicopter, man. Look at that. Oh, that's the fucking Air Force. Is that Air Force One? I don't know. Did you see it? Just went right by the.
Starting point is 00:45:31 Oh, you see. Where are you? You in D.C.? Probably trying to go find out where Joe Biden wandered off to. Guys, we got a code. He's gone again. He's gone. gone dude i've been doing this bit talking about how trump's gonna come back and we're just and then they're gonna bring joe biden back and we're just it's just gonna be this standoff of our fucking idiot is better than your fucking idiot
Starting point is 00:45:57 i mean paul we are turned around when biden turned around to shake hands with nobody there dude i don't give a fuck if you like him i was one of the funniest he just goes he said this he went like this dude he just turned around and put his hand out and there was literally nobody there and he just goes it's like dude the left and the right have to admit that they're picking the wrong person right now and we have to get back to somebody who has their faculties and that somebody that isn't a complete lunatic talking to the dumbest people in the fucking world i said how about a 36 year how about a 37 year old fucking good looking gq magazine motherfucker coming out of a limo and shit you know look tight look tight hair i don't give a fuck about his image paul how about some guy that can run the country? No, I know, but none of these guys look the part either.
Starting point is 00:46:46 Can we look the fucking part? You're just always going to be that guy with a new hoodie and a fucking Yankee hat and Air Force Ones. That's what you want out of a president. No. Actually, I almost said I don't have a president. I want a guy who looks like he could go hang out with Jay-Z. Yeah, dude, that's my thing. I just want somebody
Starting point is 00:47:05 competent and i want somebody that's gonna bring people like together but i don't know that you can do that anymore with fox news and cnn how they go after each person whoever's yeah they'll get demonized they're gonna get demonized but of course when i said i wanted them to look the part of course i meant competent i don't want some good looking guy that's a fucking moron i want a guy but but but nobody has looked the part like i mean like the last good looking guy who's president was jfk i mean come on definite definite best and look one of the youngest good looking it looked like yeah like as much as i don't like that guy and what's his name? Like that guy, the guy who put the black face on and all that stuff,
Starting point is 00:47:47 the Justin Trudeau in Canada, as much as like, at least the guy looks, the guy looks like a young, like a youthful. He's looking racist. He's like, yeah, I'm not a fan. I'm not a fan of that guy. he's like yeah i'm not a fan i'm not a fan of that guy but this this is the last thing i don't get why the democratic party is not going where we are not with these lunatic left people trying to tell you what you can and can't say and end your career and i don't know why the conservative party isn't saying we're not with these mouth breathing fucking racists morons okay like what i need paul i need sanity yeah and i don't give a
Starting point is 00:48:36 fuck what color tie it's wearing that's what i want this next one the fact that we're going to bring this back it's like you might as well have vince mcmahon running the fucking thing they should have like theme music and it's joe biden starting to make a speech they should just start playing trump's theme music and he comes storming down i mean oh shit yeah yeah i agree donald trump says that guy with the high voice, whatever the fuck that guy is. Yeah, no, I agree with you. I agree. No, because neither one of them is an accurate portrayal of what I see when I'm actually going around the country traveling.
Starting point is 00:49:18 And the people that I meet, they're not like trying to cancel you because of things you say. And they're not like trying to cancel you because of things you say. And then that racist fucking morons. They're just people like, hey, man, I was a guy and I got a couple of kids. You know, things are going good. They're just fucking normal people. Yes. That's what I I've got that to where the stuff we're seeing is the smaller percentage and the greater percentage. Three channels, Paul. No more Internet.
Starting point is 00:49:50 Right. You just go back to fucking you make it small again everybody being able to throw in their fucking comment and then like you watch these people on the internet and the stuff that they say in these chat rooms is just to start arguments and everybody just gets like all fucking mad like i can't remember last time i left a comment on anything um no why would because you're fucking normal you make i leave a comment no it's not because people know who i am paul i'm not i mean i would be right in there fucking pissing people off would you i would you be i i mean how do you resist i mean i understand trolls it's too much fun uh dude when colin quinn used to do that shit like hey say what you want about led zeppelin but you know they really needed a few more hits and people like what are you talking about like their whole album oh that's that's different yeah yeah that's like a fun look
Starting point is 00:50:37 but there are people that troll like evil you know there are people that are like he did it in a smart funny way you know you would never like you know it used to never that are like, he did it in a smart, funny way. You know, you would never like, you know, it used to never fucking happen. I'm not saying the world was better, but like,
Starting point is 00:50:51 at least you didn't have to listen to it. It's like, I, I, I don't know what the fuck's going on. There's some sort of fucking movie coming out where there's a mermaid and there's a, uh, whoever's doing the voice is not white.
Starting point is 00:51:02 And I guess the mermaid's white. And there's like white people who actually are taking the time to give a fuck it's live action yeah oh it's live action so she's in it yeah yeah oh so she's in it and they're upset why because this fictitious thing isn't like what what in the fuck yeah i don't know you know what i mean that's like i don't know it's like i'm into sports but i'm not going to literally sit there and play fantasy football that's like the fantasy football level of being like a racist i feel that that and then they're going to sit there and act like that's most white people that they actually give a shit about a mermaid movie i think that's
Starting point is 00:51:46 another thing too what rather than presenting those people as lunatic fringe people they present them as the average everyday person walking down the street right it's like the average everyday person walking down the streets like me you don't even know the fucking movie's coming out yeah no that's i i don't think i think it's a smaller percentage but since they make the loudest noise the media runs with it you know they don't even make the loudest noise they amplify it so it is it's like paul when something you do a show in front of a thousand people 999 have a good time one person has a rough time they don't like it and then they fucking interview them and then that's they become like what the show is. Well, yeah, there was something that was said.
Starting point is 00:52:25 I'm not going to say the company's name, but all this company was really upset about something that happened. So they had like a storm out and hundreds of employees stormed out. And then you found out that it was like two dozen employees, like just that like showed up. They weren't even in the building. It was like, it wasn't re it was like, but the media, the camera pans out on 24 people.
Starting point is 00:52:48 But it's the thing. Regular people are doing the same thing. They're doing that with their YouTube pages. That's right. Bad thing. It's a bad thing. Like somebody brought this up. It was a great point in my podcast going,
Starting point is 00:52:59 where the fuck is liberal Hollywood with Jackson, Mississippi right now? Do we need to change our name to Ukraine for you to figure this out? The best thing the left could do right now is help out all those people in Jackson, Mississippi and treat them like fellow Americans rather than looking down their noses at them because they don't feel that they vote the same way. It's stupid. You know, we'll hear about the same way that people on the right when hollywood catches on fire they shouldn't be like laughing going good you fucking hollywood devil media running sons of bitches like we got to stop doing that man we're killing ourselves two sides two extreme sides um
Starting point is 00:53:39 r.i.p to the queen lord knows we going to hear about it for another fucking three months, but RIP to the queen. Because I learned some stuff about Queen Elizabeth, and she seems like a cool chick. She had some really cool quotes. Rest her soul. Somebody was playing this clip of Irish. Oh, what is his name?
Starting point is 00:54:02 I just forget his name. Was playing this clip at an Irish soccer game. They were singing that she's in a box now. Jesus. Well, they haven't exactly been nice to them. Right, right. Dude, did you see Prince Charles or King? I'm sorry now, King Charles. Did you see him, that video of him with the workers?
Starting point is 00:54:22 I lost money, dude. I was convinced they were going to skip over him dude he went like this he fucking dude he came out and he fucking treated a servant like a fucking servant dude they were like oh my god dude he came out and he literally was like he looked at his dude the way he did it was like oh shit yeah that's a. It's acting like a fucking king from fucking hundreds of years ago. Fucking. That how the king has to act. No.
Starting point is 00:54:52 Exactly. That's a fucking asshole move. How about if you know what it is, Paul, at the end of the day, if you had to put money on the fight, who wins? Right. Yeah. the end of the day if you had to put money on the fight who wins right yeah you want to hear one of the most profound things i ever heard yeah with no meat on the bone the late great charlie murphy it was something that went down and he had to like take it i said you're not gonna do you know no he did something about it. Then he got in trouble.
Starting point is 00:55:26 This one, he was younger. And he goes, you know what I learned on that day or something like that? I said, what? He said, bitches run the world. So the world is run by bitches. Meaning most of those guys that are making us all miserable and all of that couldn't fight their way out of a fucking wet paper bag. They never had to. But they have all this money and power
Starting point is 00:55:48 so they got all these people to fight their fights for them. And then Charlie Murphy is looking at himself where he could have fucked any of them up but he doesn't have their juice. So then a guy like him, he was a fucking warrior, man.
Starting point is 00:56:03 I saw him one time with the fucking Tempe improv, get into it with this guy where they were just talking about martial arts and whose style was better, and Charlie was just going like, I'm telling you, man, my style's, I've fought against guys like you. You're not going to get me. The kid was like, all right, let's go. And they were just fucking twisting each other. And Charlie was looking over at me, smiling, just handling the dude.
Starting point is 00:56:24 And, like, Charlie at that point was, you know, late 40s, and this kid was, over at me smiling just handling the dude and like charlie at that point was you know like late 40s and this kid was like in his 20s he was still all you know full of piss and vinegar he had no problem with them what's that's awesome yeah man i uh that's awesome i've lost a lot of friends and with that that you know and all the friends that i think of that guy i think about him in this stuff that he said a lot a lot i really miss that guy man um that was one of the coolest things ever man i i ran into someone one time that also knew him you know it was just like yeah i i i knew charlie he was oh yeah char Charlie loved you. I knew Charlie really well. It made me feel good that he had positive things to say about me, man, because that fucking guy, Jesus Christ.
Starting point is 00:57:13 He had a smile, man. He had a – The fucking stories he had, you know, those true – those Charlie Murphy true Hollywood stories, dude, he had me crying laughing. I can't say the names. It's his story. I wasn't there, but he was talking about how he was at a party one time and there was the current boxing champion there of some weight class. And he was drunk and he was trying, he was telling everybody there that he could throw four punches in under a second
Starting point is 00:57:45 this close to your ribcage, and he wouldn't hit you. And he kept hitting guys because he was drunk. And they'd be like, oh, and they'd fucking go down. And then he would go, you moved, you moved, right? And they weren't moving, they were just hammered. So I was going like, why were people doing that? And he was going like, I don't know. The way he told the story
Starting point is 00:58:12 it was just basically a bunch of goofy white guys who wanted to get in good with this guy so they were literally to a boxing champion were going like this and he put his head in there and the last one cracked their ribs and these guys were folding oh and then he would just be like oh you move man you and he couldn't tell if he was fucking with them or whatever but he said he was in the kitchen because he didn't want he goes like he goes i don't be near that motherfucker he was drunk he's crazy he goes that's the champ i don't want to be near him so charlie had like a respect for him but he also saw the show and the story so he was like standing in the doorway peeking in watching these white guys in their fucking, you know, button down shirts like me getting folded over.
Starting point is 00:58:50 Oh, man, that's great. You know, he had that one. He had an O.J. story. Dude, he had some fucking stories of like. It was such a specific era. The people when he would tell those stories of who was there. He would tell stories and it would be like, you know, it was like me, Eddie. The second lead on Knight Rider and fucking the guy from Hardcastle McCormick.
Starting point is 00:59:20 It was just like I was like, what do you guys all get? That was a big show, man. That guy had a big show. That's great. There would just be this shit that they were doing and there was like no cell phone cameras or anything
Starting point is 00:59:39 and it was such a small puddle too, dude, as far as who was famous. So if you got too, dude, as far as who was famous. So if you got there, dude, the fucking money was nuts, was fucking nuts. Well, now I feel like it's bursted into like a billion slices of pie and there's only a few that are getting like, you know, like the big thing. Like there was a guy, like back in the day, a performer could make like, you know, like the big thing, like there was a guy like back in the day, a performer could make like, you know. Moon wouldn't make Bezos level money, but he would go out and buy that fucking yacht and go broke. Buy a $200 million yacht and have all his boys on it and shit.
Starting point is 01:00:20 And there'd be all this wild shit that happened. And now, yeah, I don't know. You can't fucking do it. Maybe that's where you got to go now. You got to out to sea um dude if you get that boat man i'm in yeah no it's fun and the the reservoir here is good but you got to get all kinds of shit now you got to get like a uh it's not just a license and a permit you got to get a water access thing because especially this is um this this uh reservoir is the cleanest. This reservoir supplies New York with a ton of its drinking water. So I got to get all these permits and stuff. But dude, when we do,
Starting point is 01:00:51 it's so beautiful, man. It's around the mountains too, dude. It's beautiful. We'll definitely do it when you come up. You know what's amazing about a guy like Charlie Murphy, rest his soul? There are certain people you feel their presence. Like, I remember I ran into that guy at Stand Up New York, and he was on stage doing a joke. And I said something to him after, just a big smile, and just like what you felt the dude. Like, certain people you fucking feel when they're there, man.
Starting point is 01:01:18 Like, you know, it's amazing. The only other guy that had a vibe like him that I was ever around was Lawrence Taylor. It's amazing. The only other guy that had a vibe like him that I was ever around was Lawrence Taylor. When I did Inside the NFL, I can't describe what his vibe was like. And he was oblivious to it. As far as like he was just being himself. It wasn't like, hey, man, I'm Lawrence Taylor.
Starting point is 01:01:43 I need to turn it on. it wasn't like hey man i'm lawrence taylor i need to turn it on he was just like i saw him like literally just like looking at like his phone or whatever and people were just drawn to him and it's beyond that's lawrence taylor he had like that thing charlie had that where it was like he came in the room you sensed he was in the room. He had that fucking laugh. And then also he was like, he was a fun guy. And he was a fucking like guy's guy. And he was a warrior too. And like, you know, it's just one of those, you can just feel like I'm not fucking with that guy.
Starting point is 01:02:21 I wish I was like that guy. I wish I could handle somebody the way that i mean he was like a fucking um he was hilarious dude and then he was also like really like inquisitive like really you know like how so well you know if he met somebody you know you just like he would he would get into shit that you wouldn't think he would get into. You know what I mean? Which I think is the artist's brain where a lot of people it's kind of like, hey, I'm from here. This is how you do things and you kind of stay in that world. where like i feel like other people that have more of a seeker brain or like an artistic brain all of a sudden like um um i'll tell you somebody who i love who reached out to me
Starting point is 01:03:16 i posted some pictures because i went to that poison motley crew joan jett and Def Leppard. And I got a text from Lunel going, hey, next time you go to some shit like that, let me know. I was like, you like Poison and Mother of the Crew? She's going, oh, that was my shit. And I was just, I never in a million years, I was like, I never in a million years would have guessed that you knew any of that shit.
Starting point is 01:03:44 She goes, no, every rose has its thorn i lost my oh my god i had no idea so i that's for me like going on the road or whatever if i'm hanging out with people i like hanging out with people like that where there's like you know and he was he was like that where it was just like he would he would like know about or be in the shit that you never thought he would. He would be into. And then the other shit that you think you'd be into, he knew all the way down to like bedrock.
Starting point is 01:04:18 Like this, like when he talked about martial arts and he talked about guys, man, he could like. about martial arts and he talked about guys do it man he could like he could do 20 minutes on those martial arts magazines because he used to read them when he was a kid and he used to always laughing at the the guy getting his ass kicked on the cover he'd be cracking up about that and but then like me listening to him reminded me of like he's into these martial artists the way i was into metal bands and i used to read hit parader so those karate magazines were like his hit parader because he was like man i still got those things like i'm somewhere in the house or something like that and um i don't know i like talking about because i don't want that shit to fade because it was you know 20 years ago we did that tour in uh yeah yeah no no this is great the um in delirious when that
Starting point is 01:05:07 woman yelled out you just hear shut up bitch that's that's charlie and that's why eddie laughed so you knew that right oh i didn't know that so during delirious and that's why eddie just laughed and actually during the taping it's on the special a woman yelled something like an instantaneous year shut up bitch and it was charlie and eddie fucking just dropped the mic and started walking around because he was so protective of him and and i was like that's i always thought he was laughing at what the woman said because he said i didn't bet y'all didn't think i could throw my voice he was talking about what charlie was saying. When Charlie, when she said it, listen again. Right after she says it, you hear, shut up, bitch, and it's Charlie.
Starting point is 01:05:52 Well, Charlie told me stories about doing security on his tour. And then when Eddie came back and was in, I think it was in Raw, when he was talking about getting sued and they act like he beat up the whole bar. Yeah. And then years later, I worked with Charlie and was saying, yeah, my brother had to let me go because I got too aggressive. I always wondered, and I can't confirm that if he was talking about that. But he used to say, he said, yeah, man, if we walk down the street and somebody, yo, Eddie, you ain't funny. He goes, I go and fuck him up.
Starting point is 01:06:30 That's so good. He's like, yeah, you're fucking talking about my brother like that. I mean, it was like really like. It was hilarious, dude, like like that guy, I'm telling you, man, like that guy was um he was that guy i'm telling you was a new york legend like if somebody ever did a mural they got you know and all the new york legends you got to put him in there and his funeral dude was incredible it was a he got a new york he got the new york legend um send off that he And it was like, it was an honor to be there. Like I was just sitting there like, like, you know, I've been to, unfortunately,
Starting point is 01:07:11 a lot of funerals. And that was that one was, you know, his funeral was was like, they his friends sent him off. Right. I'll tell you that that's that's amazing and great to hear bill how old was he when he started stand-up he started stand-up after chappelle's show right was he in his 40s when he started late 40s he was like 46 or 47 well that that uh i'm rick james bitch thing. I'm Charlie Murphy. That all fucking blew up. And then I think Don L, Don L saw it and was like,
Starting point is 01:07:54 dude, you should do standup. You and I will do a thing. And then they grabbed me and it was like, he did two shows, two open mics. And we went out on the road, and he was billed as the headliner, and it was really, he would do like 10 minutes, this is the first couple of gigs, he would do 10 minutes, he would host, and then I would go out, and then Donnell would close it. And Charlie was the guy who taught me that you can write an hour if you have to. But he started in June.
Starting point is 01:08:33 By August, he could talk for 50 minutes. It wasn't great. It was his first 50 minutes. But then he learned how to do that. That's incredible, dude. No, he wrote movies for Eddie. I think he wrote... He wrote Norbit, didn't he?
Starting point is 01:08:54 He wrote Norbit. I think he wrote Vampire in Brooklyn. Yeah, and he was talking about one of those movies, I remember. He was writing it. They were out in Hawaii. And he was talking about how his family was out there playing by the pool and everything. And he was just sitting there fucking writing this thing. That was Norbit.
Starting point is 01:09:15 They wrote Norbit in Hawaii. Because I'm an Eddie. You know me. I love Eddie. So, yeah, he wrote that. That shit was hilarious, by the way. Well, I remember we were supposed to do the improv. No, we were supposed to do the improv no we were supposed to do hilarities in cleveland and then he dropped out the last second because he had to
Starting point is 01:09:29 go fly to go write that movie and dude like they wrote that movie in like two weeks like they had that thing ready to go and then it was like the next year i think like they shot it or whatever and uh yeah he was in norbert was his idea he was watching there's a youtube video there's a famous youtube video from way back in the day big black woman and there's a uh skinnier black dude he's trying to hit her and she keeps putting her face out and as he goes to swing she'd pull it back and she'd hit him and he fell for it every time she kept sticking it out pulling it back and hitting him and then was dragging him across the street hitting it and and i remember uh i think this was i can't remember this is so long ago if he had seen it first or if i went to show it to him and then and they'd already made norbert
Starting point is 01:10:29 i feel like when i finally showed that to him he said yeah he goes that's that's where i got the idea for that movie he goes i saw that video and i was dying laughing and i sent this to eddie going eddie this is a movie you gotta be got to be this woman and this dude. This guy is scared shitless and his girlfriend beats the fuck out of him. He saw it and just was like... Everybody else saw it and thought it was funny. He saw it and goes, this is a movie
Starting point is 01:10:55 and showed it to Eddie and I guess Eddie was laughing. I feel like I'm really speaking out of school here because I don't remember how... This is my remembrance of it. This was a long time ago, so please don't. No, that makes sense, dude. That makes sense. And I remember hearing that Eddie and his brother Charlie were writing that in Hawaii
Starting point is 01:11:13 because I remember seeing it. And there were some scenes and lines that were so, because when he played the nerdy Norbit and he just would smile, like nobody did that better than him. I mean, it was the best. You know, that's amazing. Well, rest in peace to Charlie. We still love that.
Starting point is 01:11:29 What's that one Eddie did with Steve Martin? He's like, yeah, it was awesome. Oh, my God, dude. Bowfinger. Bowfinger, yeah. Amazing. Bowfinger. Anytime that movie's on, me and my wife just watch it.
Starting point is 01:11:45 My dad loves the scene where he's crying when he has to cross the street. I actually always feel bad for him. Like, I don't want to do that anymore. I mean, who's more talented? It's Eddie and Jamie Foxx. Am I crazy for saying those two are the top two? Oh, no, not at all. Not at all. And then
Starting point is 01:12:05 I think after that, if you're trying to find anybody as talented as them, you have to get out of acting. You have to go to like a musician or I don't know what. Yeah. Like that's not like, you know, guys like that come around, dude. Like one person like that comes around, I feel, guys like that come around dude like one person like that comes around i feel every quarter of a century if you're lucky yeah you know what i mean like um trying to think like i don't know like michael jackson james brown like guys like that they just don't I don't know that's why I like with sports if there's somebody that's like truly great that's why I'm psyched like over the last like 25 years every great baseball
Starting point is 01:12:54 football hockey basketball player I went out and I saw him from Kobe to Ichiro to fucking you know the Dan Marino, you know, and everybody's going to be shit on me for Dan Marino. You don't fucking get – I had no running game and no defense.
Starting point is 01:13:11 That guy threw for 5,000 fucking yards when you could beat the shit out of receivers, QBs, clothesline people, and all kinds of shit. And that guy threw for like 5, fucking yards um and 48 touchdowns when it meant something when like the next closest guy had like 27 or 30 um i'm glad i saw brady i'm really glad i saw brady i really am and i saw brady in his in his prime prime the year that he broke the record i saw him man and i The best thing that happened for his legacy was he won in Tampa too. That shut everybody up. They'll never shut everybody up because there's always going to be haters.
Starting point is 01:13:51 But, like, the greatest thing about that is it's just like, now what are you going to say? You can say he's a system quarterback. Yeah, he can't. He can't do it without Belichick. He just did. He just did. Yep.
Starting point is 01:14:03 Well, listen, I got to go get my little boy from i'm jesus little boy he's getting older uh i've got to go get uh lucas from from practice um dude what a great episode man such a great you're gonna be a grandfather with a boat on a fucking lake are you kidding me you won all you gotta get is one of those grandpa hats. It's the best. Oh, dude, I'm going to be a grandpa on a boat with a cigar. I'll put my dog on a fucking boat. You think I give a fuck? I don't understand. I just don't understand people who won't be their fucking age. Oh, this this it's the Internet, this obsession with trying to look younger than you are. Who gives a fuck? You got to be that age. Now you're this age. than you are who gives a fuck you got to be that age now you're this age yep yeah dude someday i'm 54 years old you when i'm fucking 64 i'm gonna be i wish i was 54 that's how it works yeah fucking
Starting point is 01:14:55 enjoy it enjoy it enjoy it all right um what do you got a plug bill what do you got where do you want the people to go i gotta plug the top of my head is what i gotta do um what do you got to plug, Bill? Where do you want the people to go? I got to plug the top of my head is what I got to do. What do I got? I don't know what I got, Paul. I got a whole bunch of work in front of me. I got them doing Phoenix with you. And I got, I don't know what I have, Paul. I have no idea.
Starting point is 01:15:22 I literally go day to day. I'm doing D.C. and Philly this weekend. I know that. Well, Bill's shows are probably sold. I'm sure the tickets are sold. Go see Bill Burr anywhere you could see him, billburr.com. Check out paulverzi.com. Guys, this Saturday, I am going to be at Soul Joel's Comedy Dome in Pottstown, Pennsylvania. October 7th is sold out in London. But don't you worry, because they added Paulie to October 8th. You sold out an international show. I sold out my first international show.
Starting point is 01:15:57 We added a second October 8th, so you could get those tickets. I'll be at 21 Soho October 8th. And then October 19th, I'll be at the DC Improv. And October 20th, I'll be at the Philadelphia Punchline. Going to see the Giants play the Packers in London, Bill. I'm going to be there. I'm going to be there with my family. I'll come back with a British accent.
Starting point is 01:16:17 You think I give a fuck? What would you do? Hey, do yourself a favor. Get the Indian food over there. I will. Indian food's next level. Somebody said Indian food and fish and chips. They got good fish and chips over there.
Starting point is 01:16:31 That's right. That's right. Throw down a couple beers. Throw down a couple cold ones. Maybe go into the local pub. Couple of pints, Paul. Couple of pints. Couple of pints.
Starting point is 01:16:39 Maybe we'll go into the local pub, watch a soccer game. Who knows? Who knows? Premier League is the shit. Dude, I may become cool with the King. What would you do if you saw a picture of me and fucking King Charles like this? Billy's not that bad.
Starting point is 01:16:56 Billy's not that bad. He's nice to me. Who does that sound like? He's nice to me. He's nice to me. He was always nice to me. Alright, I gotta go too. Alright, brother. Great talking to you. Good luck with your picks. Oh, hey. I'll try to keep up with you, Paul.
Starting point is 01:17:10 So we beat the book again this year. Thank God. And good luck with your Chiefs tonight. Oh, that's right. Son of a bitch. All right. Cool. All right.
Starting point is 01:17:18 Later, guys. All right. See you.

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