anything goes with emma chamberlain - failure

Episode Date: February 20, 2020

Emma opens up about changing the format of her podcast, how to deal with a perceived failure, not giving up, and ways to learn and grow from it. Plus, she talks about her decision to not go to college, the backlash she faced, and how it’s changed her life compared to other people her age. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hi guys, welcome to the first episode of Anything Goes. I keep wanting to say stupid genius. I keep like sitting down and I'm like, welcome back to stupid genius. And it kind of actually makes me a little bit sad that I'm never going to say that again. But I'm very excited because this is the first episode. And it's kind of scary, but it's very exciting.

I think I'm a little bit scared to start a new podcast because it's kind of, you kind of feel like you failed the first time when something doesn't work and you have to reroute. It's very easy to be like, oh, well, I fucking failed. So why would I want to do it again? Like why would I want to try again? Because although the podcast,

a lot of people really liked the podcast. Some people hated it, some people loved it, as everything works in life, I felt like I failed because I stopped enjoying doing it. And it was a concept I was super excited about. It was something I worked really hard on and yet like, I lost passion for it in less than a year. And that sucks ass because it's hard not to think that you shouldn't, like you shouldn't

do it anymore or whatever, but I don't care. I got back on the horse and I was like, I don't care. I'm gonna try again. And so we're back with anything goes. We're actually we're not back because this is the first episode. We're here with anything goes. And if you kinda wanna know how this podcast is gonna be structured, I will share.

So basically what we're gonna do is every episode, we're gonna have an overarching topic. And then we're going to talk about it. So whether I have advice on it, stories about it, whatever commentary or thoughts I have on said topic, I will share. And then at the end, I'll answer questions about the topic and just whatever questions you guys have. Because I love answering questions from people.

Like I, I don't know what it is, maybe I'm just a narcissist or something, I don't think I am, because I feel like I'm too aware of when other people are a narcissist, so I don't think I am one. That's a topic for another day, but I like, I love answering questions that people have about things,

like it's my favorite thing to do. Maybe it's just because I like to hear my own voice. I don't know. But that's how this podcast is going to work. It's going to be very open-ended, very chill. But I have a pet peeve about people who explain things for longer than needed when they could just do the thing that they're going to do instead. Does that make sense? And so then they just are talking like, oh, this is what I'm gonna do. When they could just be doing it

and everybody would catch on. So basically I'm gonna stop doing that and we're just gonna get into our first episode. And our first topic, I'm gonna get comfortable. Our first topic today is failure because I think it's a very important topic to discuss. And I'm very hard on myself. Because I think it's a very important topic to discuss and I'm very hard on myself. I'm very hard on myself for everything that I do and so I've felt the feeling of failure

bazillions of times in my life as everybody has but I think that I feel failure even when it's not necessary or like warranted if that's the right word So I want to get into it. First, I want to talk about my podcast a little bit and like, how that happened, like, why we're here, why I wanted to reroute, whatever. Not that anyone really cares, but I feel like it's kind of a valuable lesson. There's a valuable lesson to be taken from that process. So basically, I started my podcast last year around April-ish and I was super excited. I wanted to

make a podcast that had structure that was like, had a purpose that was educational. Like, I wanted it to be useful in a sense because I feel like a lot of the stuff I do is not really useful. And that's necessarily it's not like you go home learning a new fact. And I feel like a lot of the stuff I do is not really useful necessarily. It's not like you go home learning a new fact. And I was like, I want to do something where I feel like people are going to go home and they're going to have learned something unless they're already at home. Then they were at home and they learned something. Like I wanted somebody to have something tangible to walk away from the podcast with.

So that's why I structured the podcast around a science question. So I'm learning, they're learning, it's a win-win. But after time went on, I just felt like I started to feel like I wasn't even interested in the stuff I was talking about. And what I really wanted to be talking about was my fucking thoughts. And so I felt so uninspired. And I remember I'd be driving to record my podcast and I'd get so anxious because I'd be like, how can I like, I love the format of podcasting, but I don't really like love doing this exact thing.

How do I make myself love it? Like, can I? So I would go in and I'd try, and I would try to talk about things that were more interesting to me, and I did like that more, but I still wasn't in love with my podcast. I wasn't really even that proud of it,

because I didn't feel like it was something that I was in love with. And that's something that I've struggled with with all of the stuff I've put out is truly feeling like I love what I'm putting out there. Like, really being proud of it. And I did not feel like that with stupid genius at a certain point.

In the beginning, totally, but towards the end, no. And it started to really upset me because I was feeling like I was failing. I was like, I'm a fucking failure. I can't even do a podcast and like it. Like, it seems so simple. Why can't I just go in, record it, enjoy the process, and then go home and shut up and not think about it. But it was upsetting me because I felt like it wasn't, I felt like I failed at it.

Anyway, long story short, this new podcast is just going to be me repeating myself for an hour straight. So we should actually rename it to Emma repeating herself for an hour straight podcast. I will be sending this to my team for further review. But anyway, I took it all into consideration and I was like, I'm gonna take a break from podcasting. I took a break, I took a few months off and I ended up deciding I still loved doing podcasts

and I love listening to podcasts. So I'm not gonna quit, okay So I'm not going to quit. Okay, I'm going to, I'm just going to reroute. There's no need to give up when something doesn't work. It's all about if you like it, you just have to, it's okay to readjusting and kind of rethinking is not failure. It's like, but I really didn't want to believe that. I was like, if I reroute this whole podcast, I failed. But that is not true. And now here we are, and I feel really good,

and I don't feel like a failure, and I'm excited. And I'm glad that I didn't let my feeling of being super... just negative about the fact that the first round didn't go my feeling of being super just negative about the fact that the first round didn't go as I planned. Like I didn't let that affect me to the point where I just was like, I don't even wanna do a podcast at all because there was a point there where I felt like that.

But I decided to keep going. And now here we are. This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace is more than a website builder. It's an all-in-one place to make an online space that's entirely your own. Their all-in-one platform allows you to customize everything from the fonts and color scheme to your domain name. All you have to do is choose from one of their beautifully design templates as a starting off point. Then, at whatever you need to show off your ideas to get your side hustle on, you've got all the tools you need to sell products,

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thinking about what the future holds. I know I'm not the only one going through a lot of what ifs. Like what if I get into a fender bender or what if my home gets broken into, but state farm can help you with some of those big what ifs. They're available to answer your questions day or night. You can reach them 24-7 file a claim on the state farm mobile app or simply call your agent to ask what's on your mind. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Call or go to statefarm.com for a quote today. Failure, okay, so like, obviously,

when you fail a test at school, that's shitty. I mean, I could go on about that all day. It's like, if you fail a test at school, I wish that now that I'm not in school anymore, I wish that I could tell myself when I was a child that you could fail every fucking test that you take for the rest of your life. But as long as you're doing your best and you're, like, and you're just trying as long as you're trying.

Even if you, there's, there's a solution. There's like a way to get to your end goal, no matter what. Like even if you failed every single test, you could find a way to get a college education if that's what you wanted and you could find a way to get a job. And there's, you could find a way to do this and you could find a way to get a job. And you could find a way to do this and you could find a way to do that. It's like the little mundane little failures in day to day life. Never, they don't matter in the bigger picture.

But when I was in school, I used to literally sleep four hours a night and would cry myself to sleep every night, so afraid that I was gonna fail one test. Because mainly it would crush my ego. And I think that's the biggest thing about failures that it's an ego crush. And that's stupid.

I'm still trying to figure this out though because something happened, well, not recently, but something within the past four years happened to me for the first time that was the biggest feeling of failure I've ever felt, but it's weird because people don't talk about this type of situation as being a failure. And that's when a relationship or a friendship doesn't work out. Like, let's say you have a break-up, or you and a friend don't work out, like it just doesn't work out. You're stopping friends, whatever.

and don't work out, like it just doesn't work out. You're stopping friends, whatever. When a relationship like that comes to an end, I would argue that that's actually one of the biggest feelings of failure. Like, because that's happened to me so many times within the past, let's say four years here. It's crazy how you can do nothing wrong. I think this more actually, this more is actually for like dating, like if you're dating

somebody and you break up. Like it's crazy how even if you did nothing wrong and you and that person just weren't meant to be together, it still feels like such a failure and such a kick in the ass to your ego because you're like, oh my god, I was planning my future with this person, whether it's to be together. It still feels like such a failure and such a kick in the ass to your ego because you're like, oh my God, I was planning my future with this person, whether it's your friend who you wanted to be your bridesmaid or your significant other

who you wanted to marry, right? And have a family with whatever. And when that fails, you're like, oh my God. Now I'm back to being single, I failed. Like you feel like a relationship with somebody else not working out is a failure. I hate, I just had this realization the other day because I go through this all the time.

I'm friends with some people that I'm not, that I am, like whatever, it's like that's part of being a teen girl. And so it's hard not to feel like like I've just always beat myself up about it being like, this is my fault. I'm a shitty person, even if I did nothing wrong and I was the best friend. Like I did something wrong. I'm not somebody that people want to be friends with or I'm not somebody that people want

to date. I'm like, I'm, you know, shitty to be around. You know, I must be so not self-aware that that's why these relationships failed and I've blamed it all myself and thought of the relationship ending as being a failure. That is not the case And I just realized this literally this week. I'm not even kidding you. I realize this this week It is not unless you did something terribly wrong, even then, it's still not a failure because either you weren't supposed to have that person in your

life, number one, which is probably the case. Or number two, now you've learned that treating somebody the way you treated them, if you say treated them badly because we have to hit both sides here. Now you're not going to probably do it again because you learned your lesson and you now know that that's not how you treat a person. And you're hopefully gonna learn from the feeling that you're feeling now a failure and you're gonna do better next time.

That's not a failure, although you're feeling it, it's not. And on the other hand, if it didn't work, it's probably the other fucking person and you didn't want them in your life anyways. But in the moment, it's so hard not to blame yourself. And that's been something that has affected my self-esteem. So hardcore is even if I am like, you know what, this person is not healthy to have in my life, I'm going to remove them from my life.

Even if it's been my decision, it's still a huge, it's fucked up myself as seen, because then I am like sitting at home by myself that night, and I'm like, you know, am I ever gonna have, it like is any, am I ever gonna have a healthy relationship with anybody? Like that's broad, okay? Like am I ever gonna have a healthy relationship with anybody? Like, that's broad, okay?

Like, am I ever gonna have that? You will. Actually, I don't know. I mean, I, I don't know. I still in one, like I still, I know I will for me personally and for all of you. It's easier to speak about you guys though. I know you guys will.

Me, I'm not so sure, but that's the problem is that that's how you feel about yourself. It's a lot easier when you're looking in at somebody else's life. You can say that, but when it's your own, it's a lot harder. So, moral the story is, I think we all need to fucking chill about failing. Like, we all need to really, really try to see the positive side of all of these little daily failures

because I know for me they add up and then it's like this weight on my back. And I'm still trying to learn how to not let that get to me. But I think the key is is that once you waited out a few months and you see why that failure was a positive thing, it was just so dumb. Every fucking life coach has probably said that before. But then you can kind of see why it happened and then it all makes sense.

Whenever something shitties happening, I always just tell myself, I'm like, in a few months, I'm going to know why this happened to me. I'm gonna see why this happened. I'm going to see why and happened to me. I'm gonna see why this happened. I'm going to see why, and it always happens. Let me try to think of a good example of that. Okay, I have a great example. This is not really failure as much, but it's more just like an unfortunate event

that ended up leading to something that was so much better. So I was supposed to go to New York this weekend because my friends were in New York and I was like really fucking lonely and I was like I want to go to New York just to like hang out with my friends. Okay and I was trying to book my flights on JetBlue Whatever and I spent an hour trying to book these flights and it wasn't working

Every single time I use like three different credit cards, I was like refreshing the page, using a new browser. Like I was doing everything I could and it would stay at this like loading screen. Once I would press like confirm and it would not work. It would just not work and I've never had anything like that happen to you before.

I tried on two different computers. I could not figure it out. The whole website was crashed. I was like, what the fuck? So I ended up just being like, you know what? I guess I'm not going to go then, because I literally can't book my flight and they're getting really expensive and I'd have to leave in like two days. I guess I'm just not going to go because if I try to book tomorrow, all the flights

are going to be up by three hundred. I'm just not going to do it. So I was like, fuck this. I'm not doing it. So I ended up staying home and I was like, I'm going to be so fucking bored and lonely. I ended up being invited to an event that, you know, and I'm not doing it. So I ended up staying home and I was like, I'm gonna be so fucking bored and lonely. I ended up being invited to an event that, you know, and I'm pretty anti-social, I don't really go out, don't really go to events,

don't really do anything. But I decided to go to this event. And I ended up meeting a lot of like fucking really cool people that I wouldn't have met. And like very valuable experiences. Like I had very, I met like a lot of really cool people that I really would like to be friends with even, which is rare for me, cause I don't really,

I tend to live a very isolated life and sometimes I prefer like that. But I ended up meeting really fucking cool people. And if, and I was really upset when JetBlue wasn't working and I couldn't book my flights, I was very upset. I was like, I'm gonna be bored now. All my friends are in New York.

I'm obsessed with New York. Now I'm gonna be home alone. But see what ended up happening. I ended up going to this event that ended up, you know, allowing me to meet really cool people that I wouldn't admit otherwise. And that's fucking special. Because seeing how like that led to that, it kind of just pruded, it was like a metaphor for

me of like, okay, you got to kind of just trust a little bit. You know what I mean? Like when you fail or when something doesn't work, you just have to trust and wait. And if you wait and if you're patient, it will make sense. With this, it's just referring to most things. So that was really a lot. I don't know. That was kind of depressing.

So now I'm going to try to think about something. Not depressing, but it's like, okay, Emma, can we fucking like, let's clean it up. Let's have some fun. I need to have some fun. This episode is brought to you by the all new 2024 Chevy Tracks pack lightly. It's okay if you didn't. In the all new 2024 Chevy Tracks,

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but it only becomes an issue when you neglect yourself in the process. Spending all of our time giving can make us feel burnt out and resentful, which is why it's so important to have a space where you can talk through problems, reframe thoughts, and prioritize your well-being, like therapy. Therapy can give you the tools to create more balance in your life so you can keep supporting others without abandoning yourself. Therapy can help you when you're struggling with a specific problem. Therapists can help you develop tools that make getting through challenges easier, but also therapists are there to just generally help your well-being and help you develop tools that help you get through day-to-day

life in general. It's not just for people who are going through a major trauma. It's something that can be useful for anyone. If you're thinking about starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online, designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. Just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and switch therapist anytime for no additional charge. To get started, visit betterhelp.com slash anything today to get 10% off your first month. That's better, help.com slash anything. Let me think about what I've been up to. So I took a break from podcasting for two, three

months, two, three months. And I haven't really been doing anything. And it's kind of an issue, and I'll explain. And maybe I can even read, maybe you guys can even give me advice. Like literally you can tweet the, you can tweet the Twitter at AG podcast, okay? Just let me know. I have this issue I want to vent about. This is in the same vein as failure because I kind of feel like I'm a failure of a human being because of this. I promise not every episode will be depressing but I want why not start it out a little bit

emo and a little bit goth, okay? Because there was not a lot of that on super genius so we're really going to start this out a little emo. We can always go up from here though. We can always get a little bit more heartwarming, and it will. Although I think I said some heartwarming stuff. Anyways, so I have this issue,

and I hope that some of you guys can relate. So, because I didn't go to college, very good, oh my God, controversial topic alert. Fuck, maybe we'll talk about that one episode. Actually, that's a great topic for this episode. Great, okay, we'll talk about that next. Anyways, because I didn't go to college, I like skipped a step of life, right?

And I kind of skipped straight to working, okay? And in theory, that's kind of great. It is great. I'm very grateful that this is what, the cards were for me. And I enjoy working and that's great. But I never got to have that college experience where you're super social.

Maybe you're in a sorority. I would have never fucking done that, just knowing my personality wouldn't have worked. But going to parties, going to different types of college events, being in class every day, I skipped that step. And because of that, from the time I was 17 and I moved out to now, I've been so isolated, okay?

Like, I literally see nobody. I rarely ever leave my house. I'm home all the time. When I'm home, I'm like not doing anything. Like I'm in bed. But then when I'm like, you know, but I'm spending most of my day like working on stuff that's like whatever.

Whether that's making videos, podcasts, you know, doing a shoot, like whatever that may mean that day, that's what I'm doing during the day. And then by the time that I get home, I'm tired. And then I exercise usually at some point during the day or I'll say like I need to release some endorphins. It's like my only, it's like my drug, it's like my healthy drug, right?

That's great. But then by the time I get home, I don't really wanna see anyone because I'm so tired and like drained from talking to people all day. And then I, and then I don't wanna cook, so then I'm not being productive because I don't wanna cook. And then like, I don't wanna to cook, so then I'm not being productive because I don't want to cook.

And then I don't want to do anything like hobby-wise, because I'm so mentally exhausted that all I want to do is lay in bed and watch TikToks. So I feel like I don't have any hobbies, which then in turn makes me a little bit less interesting of a human being. I feel like I don't have as much to talk about during a conversation with somebody because I don't do anything. Does that make sense? And it really bothers me,

but I do do a lot of stuff. And I'm tired, but I don't do anything that's like a hobby. And so like, like I don't have any hobbies. I don't like do any, like I don't like know how to skateboard, I don't know how to draw. don't like do any, like, I don't like, know how to skateboard, I don't know how to draw.

I mean, I, like, I buy things sometimes, like I bought a skateboard once and was skateboarding on for a little bit and then I got like board of that because I thought I was gonna hurt myself. So whatever. Oh my God, guys, it's my cat calling. Leave that in. Like, I don't have the energy to kind of get any hobbies,

but I think my lack of hobbies makes me a little bit, maybe a little bit more sad than I would be otherwise. So what I'm trying to figure out is, what the fuck? Like how do you, I feel like I'm trying to figure out is, what the fuck, like how do you, I feel like I'm cornered, because I'm like, I wanna like do more things with my life that are fulfilling, yet I'm so exhausted by the end of my day

that I don't have any, I don't have the capacity to do those things. So I'm gonna try to figure out that balance. I'll let you know if I figured out, I bet a lot of you guys have that problem as well. I have been trying to cook a little bit, but I mean, that's not a hobby. When I'm cooking, it's not a hobby.

When I'm cooking, it's like, I'm warming up a tortilla and then I'm putting beans and cheese, vegan cheese, and salsa and vegetables and then I'm eating, and salsa, and vegetables, and then I'm eating it, and it's delicious, but it's not really cooking, because I didn't do anything. I just slapped pre-existing things together. I did also make myself vegan mac and cheese the other day.

I ate the entire pot of it, and it was so good, but I actually think my stomach is still hurting and I literally ate it like four days ago. And it was vegan, like it's not even dairy. I think it was just the volume just destroyed me. So anyway, that's my area of failure, but now we'll talk about, that's like how I feel like my day to day life,

I'm like trying to figure that out, but I'm not gonna give up. Maybe I'll paint tonight. It could happen. I bought a lot of painting supplies off Amazon, like these really cool, like very opaque watercolors, which doesn't make sense cause watercolors are usually clear, but these are like really thick and like satisfying to use.

So I might use those tonight, might fuck around, we'll do what happens. And then I also bought these pens that are called Poskip pens, and they're like paint pens, and they're really fun to draw with. So maybe I'll make some art, and maybe I'll become a fucking artist like my father. It all runs in the family.

My dad also serves, so maybe I'll have him teach me to serve one day, because honestly, that would really help me, number one, find a boyfriend, and number two, it would be fun. I think I would enjoy it it because I love the ocean. So I'll keep you updated on that, how I end up doing with my hobbies and trying to find some. But now let's talk about me not going to college.

Hmm, because this is a huge, like this was one of the other big times I've felt like a piece of shit before, but not fairly. I didn't need to feel like a piece of shit before, but not fairly. I didn't need to feel like a piece of shit. Let's dig in. So let's throw it back to 2017. I start my YouTube channel and started it in the beginning of summer.

By the time I went back to school, I had about 100,000 on YouTube, which was kind of crazy. And I didn't really know what that meant for me. And it was junior year and I'm going to school, doing my thing. And I got really depressed because it was too much work to do not even too much work, but I mean, it was too much work because I was taking all APs and honors.

While also having already having YouTube, kind of in a sense as a job at that point, where I was making my own money. So I was kind of supporting myself, but still living with my parents. And so it was like this weird balance. And I was like, okay, I need a drop all my hard classes. So I dropped all of my hard classes,

which was a huge blow to my ego. That felt like a failure within itself, because I was like somebody who had, you know, had been such a hard worker at school to drop all of their AP and honors classes because they were overwhelmed. I felt like a huge failure. And it was such, it hurt me so bad, especially the area I grew up in. I'm like a few miles away from Stanford, the college. And it's like super fucking rigorous.

Everybody's like, you know, oh, well, you and it's like super fucking rigorous. Everybody's like, you know, oh, well, you don't have a 5.0. Well, good luck going to college. Oh, you know, your parents didn't put you into this tutoring program. Sucks to be stupid. Like, that's exactly the vibes of my school. I felt like, and so, you know, dropping all my AP and honors classes. Oh my god, I beat

myself up over that, which is so stupid because my mental health was struggling so bad. And yet I was like mad at myself for dropping classes that were, you know, creating four hours of homework per night. Mind you, I had five of those classes. Doesn't add up, hello. And so, and I'm beating myself up for taking easier classes when I was literally on the verge of fucking death, it felt like. And I was mad at myself. I was like, you're such a piece of shit,

you're such a loser, you're never gonna make any money. You're gonna, you're like, you know, you're never gonna be able to support yourself, you're never gonna be able to do this or that. And like, that's how I felt. And yet, it was like at the point where like, you know, you're never gonna be able to support yourself. You're never gonna be able to do this or that. And like, that's how I felt. And yet, it was like at the point where like, if I didn't drop those classes, I was going to literally need to go to the hospital

because I was losing my fucking marbles. Anyways, so, and mind you, I'm also doing YouTube at the same time as my only escape in hobby. Slash away from me to make money because I was relying on my parents before that. So then, you know, it got to a point where my mental health was so bad, I was like, I need to leave school.

I can't do this anymore. I couldn't always figure it out. I can, you know, if I wanna go to school, there's lots of options for me to go to school down the line. This is not the end of my schooling, if it doesn't want, it's open. It's open. Like, am I gonna be able to go to Stanford down the line. This is not the end of my schooling, if it's open. It's open. Like, am I gonna be able to go to Stanford

if I leave school right now? Now, did I wanna go to Stanford in the first place? Fuck now. So who cares? I just, you know, at the end of the day, for me, it was about, you know, being happy longterm. I realized that and I was like, if I leave right now,

you know, it does close a few doors, but my quality of life is gonna improve a lot. So let's do this shit. So I took the test, it's called the Chesapeake and I graduated early and as a junior. So then I was out of school. And I was like, if I ever wanna go back to, I mean, I would never go back to high school because I technically got whatever. But let's say I wanted to go to college, you know, down the line, I could potentially test into go, I don't know,

I don't remember how that whole shit works, but like I could go to college eventually if I wanted to. So that door wasn't closed. I was like, I just need to get my shit together a little bit. And that was that. So, and I was planning on maybe doing online school, but that obviously didn't happen. Sorry guys, sorry to fucking disappoint. So now let's talk about the response I got when I left school.

So first let's talk about how my Catholic all-girl school responded. They told me that from what I can remember, I can't remember it perfectly, but they're basically saying along the lines of like, you know, basically telling me I was making huge mistake and that, you know, I was closing a bunch of doors and that I was like, they're basically trying to tell me

I was gonna become a loser. And this is all just my opinion. That's how I felt, don't I get sued. This, that was kind of how I felt that they were, that's what I felt like they were implying. In my opinion, in my opinion, in my opinion, in my opinion, in my opinion, once you say in my opinion, you will not get sued. And that is what I've learned. So anyway, so that's how I felt from them.

From my family. I think it was a little bit mixed. Some people were just kind of like, how's that gonna work? My parents were very much on board. It won't get into my family too much, but there was some bumps in that road as well. And just with people not understanding,

like people just automatically assume that if you don't go to college and if you don't follow the exact steps that were supposed to follow, that you're then a failure. And I started to believe that about myself too. I started to think, oh shit, like, you know, the first few months after I left, I was like, oh my God. I don't regret this at all. Like, this was exactly what I needed to do, but like, I feel like everybody around me looks at me and thinks that I'm like a failure. And like, I don't know, I felt like such

shit about myself because everybody was judging me and a lot of people were saying that You know, I was a loser and shit people from my hometown and stuff But here's what I've realized about that something that I learned from that and this is broad This doesn't necessarily I'm not telling you to you know graduate early from school or whatever I'm not saying not to go to college. I'm not saying college is bad. I think college is actually really great. Just wasn't for me.

And that's fucking fine. And I'm not gonna apologize for it either. I spent so much time apologizing. Being like, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I know I didn't go to college. I'm sorry. No, I'm not fucking sorry anymore. That's okay.

Because why, you know, like, that wasn't my path. And at the end of the day, like, you know, if you can find a way to make money and support yourself on your own, and you don't need necessarily a college education for that specific path that you're taking, you do not need necessarily a college education for that specific path that you're taking. You do not need to apologize for that. As long as you're working hard at whatever you're doing and you're doing everything in your

power to make yourself as successful in whatever you're doing as you can be. Then that's not a failure and that's nothing to apologize for. As long as you're being smart and as long as you're being responsible, that's a success in my eyes. And that's great. Like, I don't see an issue. I'm kind of now I'm like, oh, mad. I'm like, fuck all the people that we're giving me shit about not going to college, because that's just like so not anybody else's place either. Like, judging somebody else for not going to college,

judging somebody else for not taking that obvious path or whatever, it's just like, it's just such a dated mentality and I understand because a lot of people, a lot of jobs you do need to go to college. I'm sorry, I wouldn't want somebody, when I had a fucking kidney biopsy in eighth grade, yeah, I wouldn't want some random motherfucker

taking a chunk out of my kidney. I'm really glad that that man went to college. Thank you, 100%. I'm very, I mean, or even like there's an... Or even like, you know, my teachers, when I had teachers all throughout my life, I'm so glad that they went to college because they were able to... They were taught exactly how to... And they wouldn't have necessarily learned that on their own. There's no way to learn that at all, you know what I mean? And I can bet you that when my math teacher went into college to learn about math, they

forgot about every degree in every type of triangle. Actually, that's kind of easy to memorize, but anyways, they had shit to learn too. So I can see, I understand that. That's a great tool and an amazing resource and a necessary resource in a lot of, in a lot of ways. But on the other hand, sometimes it's not. And that's okay. And nobody should be an asshole about it.

And for that matter, nobody should be an asshole about anything. I realize there's so much like, I had this realization one day too. Kind of recently, I've had a lot of realizations recently, where it's like, why are people not mining their own business? I am so, I just really do my best. I get it. Sometimes people do shit that's so annoying or people do shit that you don't agree with. And that's totally fine. I'll be the first one to vent about that to my friends and family when people are doing things that I don't necessarily agree

with. But like, why does it have to leave that bubble of friends and family when you don't agree with something? Like, it's just, I really have never been able to understand it. I feel like I'm letting out every feeling I've ever had and every feeling I've ever wanted to express on the internet all of a sudden right now. I will probably simmer down by the third episode, but for now, I'm on X Games mode. Now we're here. It's going to be interesting for me to listen back to this later. Who knows? It's going to make me feel I'm probably going to cut out the whole fucking thing.

I don't know. But anyway, like, for example, like, you know, as I was just talking about, like me not going to college, why did that need to be anyone else's business in the first place? Why did it need to be, you know, I don't care if people didn't necessarily agree with it. If they thought that, oh, that's questionable, you know, there's a lot of issue. You could really fail that way. Yeah, that's true. But it is true. I mean, I did take a risk by not going to college for sure. But actually, well, that's up for debate. It depends on the way you look at it. But why did I need to be notified that everybody around me didn't approve?

Like why couldn't that have been kept themselves? Don't you think that people beat themselves up enough on their own? Why do you need to let the person know? Because it's so much easier to vent about it to your close circle of friends and family where that's safe, it'll never get out to anybody. You can talk about whatever you want.

You can vent, you can let loose in this safe environment where it doesn't harm anyone. Hack, fun hack. If somebody does something that bothers me or somebody's doing something, I just call my parents or I'll call my best friends. I have two of them. And I'll just vent about it to them,

knowing that it will never leave that safe bubble. And it'll never harm anyone. And it'll never leave that bubble. And it doesn't hurt anyone. But you still get to vent about it, because you need to vent about it as a human. I'm not saying that sometimes you gotta talk a little bit of shit, I get it, because you need to vent about it as a human. I'm not saying that sometimes you got to talk a little bit of shit. I get it because you need to just get it out and vent so that you can be nice and like

understanding. It's like you have to talk it through almost, right? Because we're human and we analyze others. But doing that within the safe environment of your friends, you don't need to do that with everybody you meet and you don't need to do it to the person who you're thinking about talking about. That is not healthy and it's not necessary unless somebody's genuinely in danger, in danger. But if they're not in danger and they're doing actually fine,

maybe just don't fucking do that. So anyway, I can't tell if I'm a therapist or if I'm a patient of a therapist, or if I am now a new public speaker, motivational speaker, TED Talk enthusiast, or if I am, who am I now on this podcast? I don't know. This is the longest podcast I've ever recorded.

It's 39 minutes and I don't even know what I said the whole time. I have no idea what I said. Who knows? But I'm gonna wrap it up because I feel like now I'm all in my fields. And I don't know if that's what I wanted to do with this podcast necessarily. Like I don't know if I wanted to get all deep up

in this bitch a little bit, but I did. And now we're here. And honestly, I can't take it back now. So I hope you guys enjoyed. I hope that maybe I opened your mind a little bit, but I did. And now we're here. And honestly, I can't take it back now. So I hope you guys enjoyed. I hope that maybe I opened your mind a little bit to something who knows. Like maybe it made you think about something differently, change your perspective.

That's what I would hope. Next episode, let's talk about something fucking fun. Please tweet at the Anything Goes podcast. The Twitter for anything goes is at AG podcast and you can tweet us questions, you can tweet us questions or topics that you want us to talk about. And if you'd rather call us, we have a phone number and the phone number is 5667- 7, 2, 7, 5, 3, 6, 6, 2. You can leave a short voicemail about a question or a topic and maybe we will use it because it's very open-ended. We don't give a fuck on anything goes. Anything goes!

Yeah, leave me some fun topics because I feel like my brain immediately goes to the like Yeah, leave me some fun topics because I feel like my brain immediately goes to the like insert sad music. Let's talk about failure. You know, so I'm trying to, let's try to have fun next episode. All right, I love you guys. Peace out. Have an amazing day. Oh, yeah, subscribe to us on Apple Podcasts.

Spotify radio.com., anywhere you get your podcast, we're there. Subscribe, give us a little rating. Five stars never heard nobody. Stupid genius, I think had 4.5 stars, that hurt my ego. Let's get it to five stars. I'm just kidding, I don't have an ego, just kidding I do. And we're gonna talk about that on anything goes.

Because it's normal and natural and it's something that needs to be discussed. I really need to fucking shut up. Goodbye, love you all.