Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Bullet Hole Sticker w/ Kippy & Foley

Episode Date: October 27, 2022

Are You Garbage is back with a Kippy and Foley for a family episode to answer your garbage questions from Patreon. Its a fun one! FINAL RUN! Buy the Are You Garbage Card Game: https://areyougarbage.b...igcartel.com/ Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/hfoleycomedy/ Live Shows: https://linktr.ee/AreYouGarbage PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://www.bonfire.com/store/are-you-garbage/ Beard Club: https://www.beardclub.com/ayg Promo Code: AYG True Classic: https://www.trueclassictees.com Promo Code: Garbage Established Titles: https://www.establishedtitles.com/garbage Promo Code: Garbage Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Got a news flash for you bozos the card game is back on sale. Oh my god The original edition of the card game some of our favorite questions right here Got about 50 or so of them sold a bunch of them Put them on the shelf for a little while now We're doing one final run of the original series one last job, baby It's a good good time to get hammered with your friends and find out at the people that you know That you love her garbage so do yourself a favor the link is in the description Pick up a pack today because they're gonna go quick. Oh, yeah, and that ain't it tubby. We got road dates, baby
Starting point is 00:00:32 We got two shows in atlanta coming up in november Then we're going to charlie north caroline if you're in the area get those tickets for that We got two and filly that are sold out. We got one left in providence road island those tickets are moving We got one left in boss and that is for sure going to sell out get those tickets We want to party see you there see you there gang this episode is brought to you by established titles Call yourself a lord or a lady by going over there and buying one square foot Dedicated scottish woodlands and it's a great way to preserve them Yeah guys with every order established titles plants a tree and works with global charities to support global restoration efforts
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Starting point is 00:01:33 Uh, you can use the name on your credit card playing tickets, whatever you want or just use it to land uh hot a hot date or something You know what I mean score with chicks Uh, the first 200 people purchasing a title pack using our link will effectively be Next to our plots. Oh nice with a few minutes of walking. We can build our own garbage kingdom, baby to the moon That's pretty sweet It makes an amazing last minute gift to sabotage is actually running an early black friday sale Plus if you use the code garbage you get an additional 10 percent off Go to us to average idols dot com slash garbage to get your gifts now and help support the show do it
Starting point is 00:02:04 Welcome to another exciting edition of Are you garbage the show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals? or absolute trash Now here are your hosts kevin ryan and h foley Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast. This is r u garbage Little show we sit down with your favorite comedians and we find that after you're supposed to be classy After just a big old piece of trash trash. I'm your host h foley coming at you on a beautiful day We're down here at antutti's basement. Just saw her coming out of the shower. Okay. Oh yikes
Starting point is 00:02:45 Like the conjuring. Okay. My co is just coming at you from across the table That one's got to go back in the oven for a little bit, huh? What are you talking about? God damn it I was gonna have another one, but I went with that done a little physical humor. I haven't heard it But you should have won with the other one. Plus it is all the wing Maybe the kids liked it. Anyway, my judgmental co-host is sitting across the table. He's the CEO Postero You didn't laugh it's your fault. He's the CEO of r u garbage. He's international businessman
Starting point is 00:03:16 He's also my best pal in the whole wide world and I love him. Give it up for kj Kevin james ryan. Hey gang. Thanks for tuning in As always please make sure you rate review subscribe over there on itunes You got full video available over there on youtube and those numbers are treat her up. It's cooking over there Let's get that 100k come on that listen. I know the amount of people that listen audio wise I get those reports about once a quarter. So listen Hop over there on the use tubes. Even if you listen to the audio right now pull out your phone Get us over a hundred thousand and what that goddamn plack of all my p. Diddy play and I get the the the hesitation
Starting point is 00:03:52 I don't like signing up for stuff. I don't like subscribing and then they got your email They got your info that they're knocking on your daughter asking you for money The folies don't like that stuff, but those youtube people are good people You subscribe you get the you get the episode when it comes out. You know what's going on You don't got to go look for it's a good time. Come on. I want that silver Yeah, uh, then obviously uh, the greatest goddamn website of all time. Oh, yeah Yeah, that's the one check it the fuck out, baby. We are cooking with gas over there I just looked today
Starting point is 00:04:25 There's over 90 episodes of a bonus a y g there's over 90 episodes of hard feelings Which by the way is the fan favorite the runaway the runaway star of the pack. You got the videos We got videos. We got us down the shore. We got us golfing. We got the golf tournament We got both the cribs of my childhood home the cribs of your childhood home Uh, the camping trip in get the whole fucking nine y'all go check it out We hit the goal. We're doing storage wars. We're still gonna get down to disney We're gonna have that coming up don't miss out gang. It's a good time and speaking of good times How about a nice quick shout out to our producer extraordinaire?
Starting point is 00:04:58 The magic man makes us all look good works to ones and twos he crosses the t's and he dots the eyes Give it up for t-bone McMuffin Toby McMullin everybody. What's up dudes? What's up, brother? What up t-bone boys? Talk to me down air at skankfest. Yeah, I got a tip from one friend of the show. Mr. Sean Patton Sean Patton Good good good shit that guy love that guy the best on the halloween tip When he was growing up when he was trick-or-treating they would eat the candy between each house
Starting point is 00:05:28 So so the bag looked like when he showed up. There was no bag Whoa Oh my god, they would come home empty-handed. Holy shit That's insane. Isn't that crazy dude? That's wild. How sick would you be? I Couldn't do that. This is so this is my question. Okay. I could never wrap my head around that No, because I'd want to have the uh, I'd be like, um, not the hobbits who the people that lived in the mountains The dwarves. Yeah, I'd be like, I want to hoard it. I don't have it all there
Starting point is 00:06:02 I put everything out. I put the kick after the kick cats. I put the Reese's cup with the Reese's cup Then we start negotiating. I I remember I did that one time Right I had all my candy and I I left it in a paper bet like a you know I took it out of the pillowcase and I put it all in like a big like shopping bag. You know what I mean? Uh, it was my score Man of my beagle rusty ate all of it. They say dogs are supposed to eat chocolate
Starting point is 00:06:25 This guy ate about 10,000 crunch bars 47,000 snickers. Oh man. Yeah, we had a he was shitting out wrappers for a month We had a visual hand that tore through like three fam of each land The fuck is that one of the Australian ham dogs? You've seen them. They're like golden color Good-looking dogs look kind of look like Hansi, but with a pink nose A pink okay, like a like a lighter nose any who he went through like my dog's american by the way I don't know what the fuck you're talking about You're fucking your dog from down under can kick rocks. I don't care what color his nose is
Starting point is 00:07:01 It's a goddamn american. My dog's got a black nose. All right. I can eat in vegemite surfin all day Jesus his tail in the wrong direction this fucking guy He went to like three families worth of Easter baskets and nothing happened to him I thought if a dog touched a piece of chocolate, he would die That's the the will to live I guess So this is my question to you too. If you had to eat the candy from each house How many houses do you think you could make it six? I would give up I'm not a big candy guy. I never
Starting point is 00:07:34 Man that's uh Half the eastern seaboard. You'd make it to north carolina I Hey, tom hanks um I would just be real sick I would be real sick. You are most days anyway I would be real sick at the end of the night because that really slows you down damn man. That's wild
Starting point is 00:07:57 It's a genius move by the parents really tightens up the whole operation. Yeah, you run for 20 30 minutes. All right Oh, wait his parents made him do that. You don't get a bag You can eat the candy. Oh, jeez. That's like a game show That is like a chinese game show. That's like a social services game show right there holy cow Take what you can carry that's wild Man Sean patten is a badass though. I love that. Sean patten tell you that right now. I can see that. Um
Starting point is 00:08:30 Yeah, I'd I would want to have it all Go home. You dump it out. You throw something on maybe an elvira or a monsters or something like that You throw you dump everything out. You organize everything. You start trading too. You start to swap it out. That's when it starts negotiating Yeah, that's I don't like whatever that's when patty starts wetting her beaks on the mini snickers That's what she used that. That was that was her vig. She'd come in and take her taste There's always the mini snickers. You like operating for free around here, don't you? Maybe snickers and Reese's peanut butter cups were always hot commodities at the foley house She does have a refined palate. So she does the snickers was the what was the mom's candy bar
Starting point is 00:09:08 Kids didn't really mess you do mess with snickers. I just started. Yeah, you didn't I didn't really mess with snickers I remember my brother did that was like broccoli when he was european It's like what the fuck how much how mature are you dude? Yeah, yeah, no kidding crunch for sure Reese anything with peanut butter But why don't you start getting into weird new giddy bean old peanuts or something? Yeah, it's like trail mix. No, thank you But now I love them. Snickers is the best candy bar ever Great. I would somehow come back to that every three episodes Speaking of food Believe it or not. I have a I have a question for you. Um, if this is trash or not. So we were away
Starting point is 00:09:47 Uh, we had uh, someone watching the spot watching the kitty cat. We had a cat sitter. Okay, when were you away? We were just away last weekend. Oh, it's right. Okay. Yeah, sorry. Sorry. I didn't realize she was away. She was away Yeah, we were both away so, um We had the cat sitter Same person that we've used, you know for for maybe like a year or whatever any who Um, we didn't get a chance to get to the grocery store. So she bought a couple of things. Oh boy She bought some waffles and she bought some, uh, you know those prager's
Starting point is 00:10:20 Um, dr. Prager's, uh, veggie patties. No, but some of them frozen veggie frozen veggie patties Is it trash? Yes. If you eat the food, the gas Yes, 100 she also left body wash that I've been using. It smells fantastic and a dildo Strawberry lube you're using on yourself. Shout out to adam and eve put a little on your toes Is that trashy? Yeah, dude for sure for sure for sure I used to have to Airbnb my spot out. As you know, I've mentioned that a handful of times And people would be like at checkout. I'd be like, hey, you know When you check out just leave the key and they would like message you like nice like hey, thanks for checking out
Starting point is 00:11:06 But that's a big thing of staying in an Airbnb in new york It's like you're gonna make a couple bills at home. People are traveling. It's so expensive. There's a half of lasagna Yeah, so they're like, there's you know a fucking half a big zedian there if you need it I'd be like, uh, what are you fucking you think we're gonna eat some food that's been stranger made in my apartment I'm already torching the bed. So it's she's not a stranger So I'm assuming you ate it with this line of defense. Oh, yeah, what do you mean? Would you eat? I ate the uh To choose that choose the healthier option here because you're paying yourself into a corner. No, I ate the veggie patty. Yeah In between two waffles
Starting point is 00:11:39 I was at a bread toby has an appetizer for my breakfast No, I had a waffle, of course you did Come on, man. I was letting eggos in there. You find eggos in the freezer. You make a move. She's also You're surrounded by enablers. She must uh, she she must be She she's she's good with food. She got the the good maple syrup from trader joes Who's buying a fucking bottle of maple syrup for staying for a weekend? Huh? Because she wanted to take care of herself That's what you worked out well for me
Starting point is 00:12:12 That maple syrup's expensive Good stuff. Uh, this next way in will be interesante All right, let's get down to it. This is a family episode guys Oh, yeah As you know when you sign up for the patreon you can get your question read on a year And we're gonna do that right here with the kipperino kicking it off. Let's go baby Oh, baby, we got some geeters with the heaters of questions this time and uh, I wanted to start off with this one because we were just uh, you know
Starting point is 00:12:40 We've been traveling around a lot this one's from and I never thought about this This is from spencer twenty dollar bozer here shot in a fucking top race out there Look at that. Is it garbage if the majority of your vacations you go to are at the casino hotels because they give you the best deals Do they? Yeah, because they want you I think this question's asked under the assumption. You're not gambling You're just going to stay at the hotel. Sure, which I feel would be the trashiest So casino hotels they give the lowest rates because I guess under the assumption is you're there They're hating you over to have for the breakfast. You're fucking you lose the money at the tables
Starting point is 00:13:12 Sure, I want to keep they want you it's easier to get yet the tables once you're in the door Is this vegas we're talking about? I don't know. He doesn't he doesn't say where else is gambling legal like that Where else can you see those almost and I would argue in every country or in every state there's casinos Sure casinos that in philadelphia. There's casinos in Jersey if you're do if it's not like a warm destination or like near a beach or something Yeah, that's a tough look. Yeah. Yeah, I mean if you're going like, you know, if you're staying at the fucking casino outside disney world That is a bad. I'll even give you that but if you're The happiest place on earth you're you're at an indian casino
Starting point is 00:13:50 If you live in michigan and it's summertime and you take your family away and you go to a casino in philly and just stay there And do the pool and all that stuff that's that's trashy That's that's trash. Yeah, if it's near the beach, I'll give you something. I'll give you a little leeway on that Sure, I understand that too. But yeah, but also I mean I don't know staying to walk through a casino with like, you know pool noodles and stuff to get to the beach is a tough look They don't make you got a zigzag through those goddamn things Oh man, you got a blown up raft for like you got your boogie board and you're walking past the craps table It's like a maze trying to get out of there
Starting point is 00:14:32 It's going off the kids are having seizures too fucking much, man Yeah, man, that's no bueno. Yeah, that's no good. Um, this one's vacation as well It's just from drew pee weiner shout out to him Uh, homie of the ten bones variety says there you go never had a question read before Are you garbage if your parents took you and your two sisters to a nudist colony as kids? That Has to be illegal though. It gets real weird with those nudist colonies. They're not as fun Not everybody's hard and shit like that. Is that what you expect? Yeah, what do you mean?
Starting point is 00:15:07 The guy wasn't even hard. What am I looking at a soft queen over here? Chop it up Gary. I'd rather see a hard one than a soft one soft ones are weird. Look at they're looking at you. Yeah, um That's First of all, they're never say it's never I mean this is like old trope. You hacks up But it's never the people you want to be at the nudist. It's not sexual either. It's never like sexy never got Like people playing volleyball. You're halfway there. What are you doing? She's got clothes. I'll take a move something As a kid though
Starting point is 00:15:37 I mean, I would have been walking around with a little stinger the whole time I don't know. Check it out. Boop. Yeah What again, they're not as a lot. I need a good I need a good As a child as a little kid when you're a 12 year old kid if you see boobs, it doesn't matter Why could that could be on a dog? It doesn't matter. Oh, I don't like the nipples on a dog I've I've had very staunch on no nips on any dog. I saw one that was pierced the other um All I know is that I still wouldn't do it for I I think even at 12 or 13 I'd be more like
Starting point is 00:16:13 Gross dad. It's just more like mechanical or something. There's good naked and bad naked Those kids definitely grew up to sell nitrous in a parking lot at some point. Yeah, there's they followed around fish or something Yeah, I wonder what the parents do I don't know the nudist colony on vacation. I probably a couple CEOs Yeah, just able to take us to nudist colonies for the weekend I don't know. I've seen a couple of those on hbo Unlike the not tax. Yeah, something like that man. They're like out in the woods and shit. Yeah, I think it can't be in midtown What are you talking about standing in line at a japotle family walk through the casino like that, uh, yeah, no, that's uh,
Starting point is 00:16:54 That's that's gotta be illegal. I think right that can't be that sounds like hold on. You think the kids were naked too Either way, I don't think I don't think you can put your children in an environment That's like you can't put your children in an environment where there's a bunch of naked If the kids are naked, that's real fucked up. Yeah, I don't think some old creepy dude You gotta write in mr. Weiner write in please. Yeah, god damn it Uh That's I mean, there was there was a while in new york. There's one not too far from here where comics were doing shows
Starting point is 00:17:23 It's in like new, you know upstate-ish somewhere probably two hours away and comics were doing shows all the time Did you have to be naked as a comic? No, no, no, no the comics were clothed But I remember like people like I'm gonna do the it was like a gig you would get every like couple of months or somebody You know, I'm doing the naked gig. I'm doing the naked gig. Hmm. I remember being I was just like what the Fucking insane to me. Mm-hmm. No, thank you. The kids are naked. That's fucked. I keep my clothes on door and hanky-panky Yeah, nobody wants to see me people are eating. I'll be fucking puking everywhere. Um Yeah, I did see that naked roast at the festival
Starting point is 00:17:58 Which is a site to be seen It's uh who wild Who is I didn't know what was happening. I'm like, what's going on in this room? They're like the naked roast I was like up here in there and then after like eight seconds. I was like, what am I doing? Is I regret this? There's a famous porn star there though. Evan stone a dude. Yeah, nice. Yeah, lady
Starting point is 00:18:22 Yeah, Evan stone. Remember Evan stone. He was big in like the early tooth that he stone I remember Evan Peters. Wasn't there an Evan Peters? That's an actor now A spider man. I remember the guy that used to hook up with uh, Nina Hartley all the time. That's going way back down He had like uh, like brown hair that was kind of slick back. He was like muscular. He was in uh He was in boogie nights. He was the one banging Nina Hartley when william h macy walked in He said, you mind closing the door buddy? I remember him. That's that's what you're talking about Heard that Jason Ellis has got a hammer on him. Yeah, he does. There you go. It's pretty good Stuck around for a couple of the other guys. Not so great
Starting point is 00:19:02 A lot of uncuts running around too. I thought I thought I was in I thought I was in Denmark Is this Vegas or Europe? What's happening here? Somebody get the cigar cutters that Where's the turtleneck in Nevada? I know Jesus Christ. Hot you much. Hey, buddy crack a window on that thing I Windows broke on that. What's going on? Um, all right, this one's from ariana. Is it garbage to have more than one empty pack of smokes in your car? Yeah But usually that's where they go to go in the back. See I don't smoke in the car anymore
Starting point is 00:19:39 No smoking in the jeep. Okay, since I got the new one you have you yet at all not one Not one little puff puff. No a little Can you believe that window? I don't know. I genuinely don't believe that That's why I'm that's why I'm following up until you break and tell me the truth 100% I haven't which I just just when you said I thought about it damn I could do that that long and not break on that haven't smoked don't let patty smoke in there Don't let anybody smoke in there if I want a heater I pull over and I've noticed this From driving with you so much. I started to adapt the
Starting point is 00:20:14 To pull it over. I break it up a lot more than I did I used to white knuckle it all the way through didn't matter how long it was somebody's got a pee I'd be bitching now hour and a half in pull over stretch the legs have a heater get back in the car and keep going I think if you were still smoking in the car, you wouldn't pull over though 100% Yeah, you would fucking steamroll those tough break But yeah, the latitude had fucking It was like a stakeout. Yeah, it was bad packs of heaters back. Um, I keep all I still in my car have
Starting point is 00:20:49 Easily 12 empty packs of fucking mar mar bezies in there still empty just like in the glove in the center console Really, that's where they go that in parking tickets. You should see the you don't clean that card that much, do you? You don't you don't put a lot of loving to it. No, I do you do. Yeah, I don't use it that much So that's the thing, huh? So it's like the only like actual dirt or not dirt whatever the only actual like Is like if we drive somewhere and like We have like, you know It's like a coffee cup a bottle of water and like something that like and a you know
Starting point is 00:21:20 If you guys are going on a long trip like when you when you when you two went to the wedding before you went before you drove up to Upstate new york, did you go and get the car washed and the car cleaned out and all that stuff? No, really? Oh, I always get the car hooked up before a nice trip Always clean it out get it fresh in yours every day. This is the difference. You're putting a lot of wear and Stuff in your car Mine's mine sits. You just said he had packs of heaters and tickets everywhere in the club in the center console. I said Okay. Yeah, I never open because there's nothing in I don't It's like I literally get in the car. I put in drive. We drive. I put in a park and then I leave it for
Starting point is 00:21:58 Weeks at a time. I don't even know where the fuck it is. Hmm I started to take pictures because I forget where it is Shit, well, it's like it's you know, I just take the parking ticket I got to check to see how many fucking dings I got on that too. Very good on that. That's a bad day I saw them putting fucking boots on the car in the neighborhood yesterday. It's a real bad day, man Check that out. You got the you gotta do is put your license and I tell you everything you got you pay it right there I'm aware bud. I'm aware. But you know you live and you learn I like to walk on the wild side Come get me pussies. That's another thing too of the new the new car
Starting point is 00:22:33 Not one ticket yet Clean as a whistle. Well, you have a parking spot true. So that'll do it I mean before Before you parked illegally for six years I've still rolled the dice a couple of times. Yeah, get a murder out there. Mm-hmm. Kevin. How about that true classic, baby? True Classic I got one on right now to my sweatshirt. It feels good. It feels loose in the right spots It feels cozy in the right spots. I get regular t-shirts. I got to go in there. I got to do the fact. I
Starting point is 00:23:03 Stretching it out true classics and slide rights on man. They got the nice crew neck the sleeves feel good covers the belly It feels fantastic gang big guys. I'm telling you right now Do yourself a favor pick up a couple of them true classics Yeah, guys, uh, true classics is the one-stop shop for casual crew next poll is an active wear I've said this is all I've been wearing. I wear a lot of black tees. I got about 30 or 40 of them at the crib I've always been a true classics man. I saw it on instagram originally. I clicked it It's fancy. You feel like a you feel like an old college athlete You know what I mean? You look a little swalled t-bone even said one time
Starting point is 00:23:37 He goes that's the best cutting t-shirt I've ever seen on a man in his life. I look good No big deal All their gears top notch quality with great prices try their polos knit workout shirt all All you fat fucks out there. This is their copy. Not mine. They have long body options sized up to Excuse me 3xl for the big man. There you go. Don't drop the ball upgrade your wardrobe with true classics get 25 I can't believe they call everybody that much get 25% off true classics.com with I know my kind of guys with Code garbage free shipping included on purges is over $100 that's 25% off at true classics.com with code garbage strengthen your core wardrobe with
Starting point is 00:24:12 True classics today. Kevin's talking about that beard club. Oh Love that beard club. You gotta keep the beard looking lush. You gotta keep it looking thick. You gotta keep it looking soft Sometimes it gets real scraggly. It gets like wire. You look like a bozo if you get on a beer club Keep it nice. Keep it smooth. Keep it trim. Keep it beautiful, baby with the beard club Yeah, guys, as you know, I'm a bit of a chubster myself a heavy bike boys. I call it that might be merc come merge coming off Shut the heavy bike boys. Uh, I like that Uh You gotta you got a double chin. You gotta look you got the jowls working. It really tightens it up
Starting point is 00:24:48 It makes you look all right, especially if you're balding in the front You pull a little here a little distracted little smoke and mirrors as I say Uh, beard club is here to help as the leaders, uh, as the leader in beard first men's growth and grooming The beard club delivers quality hardware and consumables that'll give you a better thicker fuller looking beard Uh, head to beardclub.com slash ayg take the beard quiz use code ayg at checkout They'll recommend the best beard kit for you no matter what type of beard you have the beard club is the perfect Has the perfect kit to fit your needs Go grow your bet
Starting point is 00:25:21 Mouthful grow your best beard today take 20% off your first order when you go to beard club.com slash ayg and use code ayg That's beard club.com slash ayg code ayg for 20% off your first order beard club over 2 million beards serve Um All right, let's see here. Where are we? Uh, speaking of cause this was connor Is it garbage to hold your socks outside the car on the highway to freshen them up? Oh, I don't even know How that happens can you do that while driving you can take your socks off? I can't Dude, I need the bed. I need a corner. It's a whole project. That's crazy. How bad are your socks and where are you going?
Starting point is 00:26:08 I just gotta have a softball game or something like that. But then you would assume you're going home So you got to be doing something pretty musky Work boots golf fucking softball then go into like a nice restaurant, I guess Unless you're just putting on dirty socks in the morning. That's what I think is happening. Sounds like it. Yeah Yeah, I can't do the dirty socks Believe I could do dirty underwear all day. I'm doing that right now actually doing dirty undies. Yeah Yeah, if you let them if you wear underwear one day, we've been traveling so much enough time to do goddamn launch 100% You wear dirty underwear. You wear underwear one day. You let that sit out for two or three days
Starting point is 00:26:50 That's fresh Everything dries out more than two or three days for me personally. I need about I need about Five days. You want to give it a week? Yeah, I need a I need close to a week to age Yeah, no to read that age age sounds like it's cheese or something. Well, the only well No, that's what you're making down here, buddy. This is to re I hate to tell you there Berteli. No, this is to to reinvigorate. I would say sure but the only problem is The then the shelf life on them isn't as good. You get halfway through the day and then oh, then you start then you start feeling it Yeah, yeah, it's a come off right now. If you want to you guys want to take a look
Starting point is 00:27:25 You know what I do in the hotel sometimes I'll lay them over the air conditioner Let me see your whole room smells like ass. All right. There you go. That's good. That's what you want Let them get freshened up a little bit. Yeah, and also too. You know what those The air conditioners that are that are underneath the window in the in a hotel that that blow up What are they called? They're not the window units, but the vents right there. Yeah, man You put your leg up on that after you get out of the shower Calm down the middle east with that day. That's coming right off the course The boy that's not coming from like up on the roof or anything that's coming from I love that
Starting point is 00:28:00 Because I use the hair big window unit. I use the hair dryer most of the time when I get out of the shower I just like the feeling I want everything dry and fresh down there because I know what it's gonna list You know, I hit it with that and then I hit it with the gold bond spray Which I had to figure out because I wasn't using it right I was going in there on full automatic and I would have it upside down and it would just Just the aerosol would come out and then by the end it would be full, but it wouldn't work. You got to pump it Shake it up pump it shake it up pump it. You are one of the great minds of our time. I thank you. Thank you What is a lot of routine? I was just paying free on a spraying free on on his nuts for six months
Starting point is 00:28:36 Till he found out he was doing it wrong. I can't be good for the kids. I'll pay it out Yeah, get out of here with a layer of clear coat So much goddamn lacquer on these things Put a little ether on it Little pledge in the butthole Let me say Um, man, you are something else this guy Um
Starting point is 00:29:00 Let's see here. Bye. Bye. Bye. Hey buddy. Hi. How about I be bad up? This one's gonna get me jammed up just even in the reading of the question Uh, ten dollar freakazoid. I'm with that. Uh, this is from bald 22 year old retired linebacker. Oh, that was the guy in I was shitting on him. That's what I said. He looked like I said he looked very tired linebacker. He was bald at 22 Uh, detroit got to detroit Uh, he's ferned out ferned out. He's out there in a front row in detroit. Uh, oh, yeah What is the proper way to pronounce? I'm jammed up already. This is pretty bad. I'm not gonna hold on a second. Hold on a second. Toby get the dump button ready
Starting point is 00:29:43 It's Worcestershire sauce. Oh, okay What'd you think I was I thought it was gonna be some word that would have sounded something racist walking you right into a dark alley Worcestershire Is that the what's the Worcestershire Worcestershire sauce? I've always known it as Worcestershire sauce Worcestershire Yeah, I don't think shires Worcestershire sauce I think that's too Staccato, is that what it is picado picate?
Starting point is 00:30:16 staccato staccato Worcestershire Worcestershire sauce Worcestershire Worcestershire sauce That I mean it's Worcestershire. Hey, I gotta get it I'm not listening to some fucking computer It's the first thing that comes up if you do how to pronounce Sorry, what Worcestershire sauce Worcestershire Worcestershire
Starting point is 00:30:40 I don't know if this broad knows what she's talking about. Yes. What's it's google's doing it. They don't know That's all they google don't want us to look like idiots. No Worcestershire Okay Yeah, it's great and bloody merry Worcestershire sauce That's how the brits say it No, thank you. Let me check my schedule beat it. What are you guys at? What are you guys in queue right now? It's Worcestershire. What's queue line?
Starting point is 00:31:10 The queue the queue to get in That's where we get that from When it's queued up your netflix queue Sure, you had that queued up. I think is a little different But the they say that the line in the uk like you're in line Where's the key? It's at the queue the queue k or sorry q q u e I uh So when netflix was was was handed out cds or dvds
Starting point is 00:31:38 What? I missed all that I wasn't fucking with netflix when they had the when they were sending the There's no way patty was letting things get mailed to the house like that. Yeah, and not until it was streaming Yeah, not until it was streaming that we get on board But I remember my cousins and everybody saying yeah, I have it in my queue on netflix That means when it's available. They're gonna send me a copy Sure, that's the same thing
Starting point is 00:32:00 Yeah, that's one application of the word. Toby google how uh garth brooks says wish to shire sauce America. Yeah, I want an american barbecue See how jelly roll pronounces it god damn it. Let's go. I'm not listening to this broad. It's pronounced honey mustard I believe you're talking about a one sauce my man Yeah, I'm not listening to her Oh man Get out of here with that. Yeah wish to sure wish to sure sauce wish to sure wish to sure I'm I've never I wanted to like it too. I've never I'm not I could never confidently say that you don't like it really
Starting point is 00:32:42 Great, I don't know it's in a lot of things that you like you like cocktail sauce. No, you don't no interesting You like ketchup Not huge fan, but yeah, I mean I'll die dabble you like barbecue sauce. Sure. It's in that. Okay. Yeah Sure, what else do you like? I don't like you. They put a little You've got to be filled with it because I hate you. You know what it's in what manhattan's Yeah, this I don't know what you're talking about That and IPA's uh
Starting point is 00:33:12 Not an IPA man. Um, yeah, we are Toby cut that Uh, this is from Julia ten dollar homie long time bozo finally have my garbage question ever done coke on christmas Christmas day or christmas eve. I would say I christmas day, I feel would be the sadder Christmas eve, there's some party to it, right christmas eve as we're all getting together We're joining up families cousins friends ever your whatever that would however you define family That circle's coming together and you're having some cocktails. You're getting pretty crazy and at certain ages
Starting point is 00:33:52 I'm sure a bag gets broken. You're with the cousins haven't seen in a long time. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you got anything I still got some upstairs if it's later on when maybe some of the older folks have gone the bad I mean, you can't be doing bumps with fucking grandma. I know. Yeah By the the the meatballs are out the sweetest meatballs are still out like that I just imagined christmas days of dude puppet lines. It's good. Oh, man. I gotta get that tree up Anybody got an extension gourd? Oh man Poor kids. Yeah, you should be doing if you got kids. I'm talking about like college. Yes, of course 20s whatever your 30s 40s. Yeah, come on 47
Starting point is 00:34:31 You'll be 47 this christmas Uh Yeah, that's a real tough look. I feel you know Although I have in my you know, uh early 20s days. We would go party on christmas day Christmas day night with the boys with the boys. Yeah, because my mom would go to my my step dad's family's house My brother would go to his girl. You're talking college. Yeah 20s when you had that month off to do absolutely nothing Come on. That was all right. Pick up. Everybody's got fresh gear on at the pub. You're hanging Maybe a little bit of cash on you. Yeah, I gotta my ink. Kate. This is for sure what happened. I go to my ink. Kate. Uh
Starting point is 00:35:14 In the city we'd hit ankates. It would just be me. So then I would fucking, you know I would get there and go, I'm gonna get mobile out of here because I got to get back to the fucking hood You know to meet up with the boys. I'd hop out of there and call fucking pad off And when there's no guilt of like that's christmas. I guess but when they're going, all right, you're going somewhere I'm out. Well, it's like every my whole family had dispersed so I would go to my aunt's house Because my you know, and I didn't want to whatever so I would go there see my aunts my uncles my grandparents So I did all my my responsibilities were all checked And then they start wrapping it up because it's all older heads. I go, I'll see you
Starting point is 00:35:49 You were just making sure you hit up every house to get an envelope. Yeah, get greased up a bit Shout out to aunt carol. Shout out to fucking aunt patty. Shout out to aunt kate. They take care of the kid Shout out to uncle Joe nada used to come in heavy bike with the envelopes and kate hunter and every time I see her She got no kids break you off real quick. Who'd sweet was great. Um, so I hit pad up yo Let's go spend that christmas cash, you know what I mean? Everybody's flush So we'd go to fucking the pub man. You're just like sitting there and like new amber carbion can't tell me nothing Who shoot the cuffs when you walk Chrissy? It was more of like express At that time we were fueling ourselves a little bit thin sweaters with like the nice
Starting point is 00:36:31 With like a shirt on with a button up under it or something a nice pair of khakis New pair of jeans with a sticker on the side It's a large large large still says 38 32 on it or whatever again I was always bad. You show up to christmas dinner. I'm like your cousin. You got a tag on it. Fuck We're at 38 29 is like a porker I think Becky own has that you're you're an upside to you're an improper fraction or whatever it is 38 30s
Starting point is 00:37:07 That's where I was I was looking for 36 30s over in europe and like they they can't comprehend that a guy would be that proportion You know what I mean That's a lean group over there um Yeah, you can't but we would party and it was like sad we go there and like Spend it how we would spend like a saturday night watching the fucking eagle. You know something, you know watching a Yeah, I wouldn't say that sad your young guy But you would look around and like this is oh when you look around at the other people that are there you get sad
Starting point is 00:37:37 That's like why you never eat in a mcdonald's because you look around and you see other people that are sad Or why you never make eye contact with anybody when you're in a walmart Walmart target those places are great until you get to the checkout and you look at other people and you're like, oh my god Do I look like that and yes, you do look like that. It's a tough look um No, but you just go like oh, I should be that's when it really hits you you're like, oh, I should be home with My family and loved ones not the guy in a car hard check it's smoking cigs at the bar calling claiming claiming claiming steak on the pool table now
Starting point is 00:38:11 Yeah, but they already you said they were all out your brother was with his girlfriend and I don't I mean it's midnight My mom, you know, I mean people are home again. It's not like they but it's not like they went to colorado for the month I don't know. I think that's okay. And I'm a big guilt guy. You know that I love the guilt I know but I'm telling you as the guy who was there. It's it's it's a sobering Moment of you're like I'd rather spend the time At the place I can spend the time at all. It's not like a special. It's not like they're having a Christmas party You know, like I got to get there. It's you know, you're eating fucking wings and Doing fucking Yeager bombs or whatever. I'm sure you made it back there at some point hit the fridge
Starting point is 00:38:46 See what you had left in the envelopes And I tell you what that break between Christmas even if you were working I had to work a couple of years Wasn't that big always did yeah, it was still all right a month off just chilling I would have to yeah, it was a lot. It was a lot of time It was like always like December 15th to January 17th or something Broncos There was a couple of schools that had like tri semesters trimesters. That was big Delaware had that and I'd be like that fucking Delaware didn't have it did they yeah, I think so they had some went there. They had something weird like that I think it was Delaware Drexel did maybe it was Drexel. No, I don't think Delaware did
Starting point is 00:39:24 I could be wrong though. Maybe Drexel was something real stupid, right? It was like a trimester So they would go like they never had like a full break. They got like a week off in the For Christmas and then like three weeks off for the summer. I wouldn't have went there Yeah, that would have been a deal. They also didn't like you either That's not same. Hey, I would have never graduated from there probably very true Yeah, I checked out was the first thing I checked out. When's the winter break start? What's the deal sure and check out the cafeteria? And the birds see what's cooking on campus
Starting point is 00:39:55 Oh established titles. Good lord. Ah, yes, Lord Jean Jack Good lady. You'll soon be in a war with lord dirty underwear I can tell you that gang do yourself a favor get over to established titles You can buy yourself just one square foot of scottish woodlands. Mm-hmm and be called a lord or a lady Yes, that's pretty sweet. It's pretty sweet. We got plots Me and a big man got on there and T bones got one too. That's T bones right there So the first 200 people purchasing a title pack using our link will effectively be next to our plots within a few minutes of walking, baby We can build our own garbage kingdom or our own army. We're coming charles. We're coming for you, baby
Starting point is 00:40:36 Sir William chit chicken tenders. Let's go guys. It makes a great last minute gift. It's easy peasy You go sign up officially change your name to lord a lady. You can use that name on a credit card playing tickets That's pretty sweet. Use it to land some ass Close some deals. You know what I'm saying Established titles is actually running an early black friday sale Plus if you use the code garbage to get you get an additional 10 off go to establish titles.com slash garbage You get your gifts now and help support the channel. Let's be neighbors do it. Let's go Um, all right, this one's from Abe. Uh, you ever give a little kid relative a toy without the batteries to use it
Starting point is 00:41:13 That's that's You're losing uncle the year or aunt of the year award right there now You gotta come correct to make sure they can use it immediately. Yeah, I'm a nerd with that stuff Yeah, I've gone so far as I've put it together and give it to them Sure, that makes sense play with it a little bit before I give it to yeah, but that kind of takes I think they like the excitement of like the box and whatever. Yeah giving them like a completed thing is like kind of fucking whack You know what I mean? It wasn't a lego and it was one gift. I remember specifically
Starting point is 00:41:45 It was when the Avengers came out They had the queen jet and they had a an iron man that flew alongside of it Then I got him a bunch of other stuff too, but that I opened and put that together and that was like played with it as a tub a little bit That was sitting on top of the big pile of toys. Okay. My mom used to do cool stuff like that She'd set one or two things up So it was all the presents lined up in packages and then like one or two things like you know, like showpiece Sure. Yeah, like a macy's window
Starting point is 00:42:16 She did all right Yeah, I don't know if we did that really We also had to go back and uh When we were when we were done opening everything up and playing with all the toys We had we had to like put everything up. We had to like organize everything and put everything neat in front of the Christmas tree. So when people came over Do a little face throwing. Yeah, show them the basketball net or whatever. Yeah That's real classy. I could throw it in your loved one's face was how good your Christmas was
Starting point is 00:42:46 That's that's what kind of fucking dirtbags you are He got the nerve ball Show you show you show you less fortunate cousins all your nice toys. We were the less fortunate cuz They went over and kick him in and kicked our stuff Uh has their name on it there's some last year Oh, that was the worst getting jealous of what other people got for Christmas. Um I remember this. Yeah, I never I remember this girl coming in. She stayed at the number of presents she had She's like, I got 27 presents
Starting point is 00:43:21 I remember where she lived and I'm like this ain't Were they from the dollar store or something? You count the batteries You get a 12 pack of crayons this thing why this ain't adding up Um, if I got crayons that would have been a problem I think I probably got like an art set of some remember those like Like classic art set you would open up and like the pastel colors were there. There was colored pencils. Yeah I'm sure I'd ruin that in about 15 minutes. Never lasted. No ruin it
Starting point is 00:43:51 Ruin it dogs eating like paint. Yeah, there wasn't a toy that I didn't break I remember one of my cousin's girlfriends Gave me and my brother I got the From smoking the bandit and he got the duke's a hazard car And it was like this But they were bigger and like full of detail like it was probably at the time 56 the hood opened all that stuff remember the size card dude me like metal too, right? Yeah, dude me and my brother
Starting point is 00:44:20 We got them She was watching was babysitting us. They were in the room watching like a movie or something like that Me and my brother went in the living room and just started Smashing them together and literally disintegrated them Man, she came in balling her eyes out. Yeah, my mom came home. We fucking got lit up I don't mean Christmas lights either Took a beating for that one. Hey you with the old fucking left left right. She goes out and buys you this and you destroy it Hey with the mickey whore body body body head
Starting point is 00:44:52 Whoo Dicky told me that and the big man came downstairs started laying heat From the top ropes with the elbow drop. You flashed a gun on us Any you pussies want to get sweet? She just showed you some nickel Started putting the car back together like we worked at pet boys Um, all right. Let's see here. This is from john Have you or anyone you know never had bullet hole stickers on your car?
Starting point is 00:45:24 No, that's trash That's trash. I gotta say You did not my stepdad did sure and we thought it was The coolest thing in the world. I mean, yeah when you're 10 it is called You know 42 whatever uh No, man, I remember like Really thinking that was when those dropped those magnets
Starting point is 00:45:47 They were mag and I was like, this is the fun. We are the coolest family in the world. You missed the whole Uh, you were too young for the windshield. They had they would have something on the windshield But they dudes had banners on the windshield. Yeah, no, they have that go over they had that when you were a kid Yeah, I remember we were on the lacrosse bus One time and we were coming back from a lacrosse game and this dude pulled up in like a geo tracker Some like 25 year old 20 year old dickhead. Fuck it. Yeah and on the windshield. It said your girl's next Dude, we started where what's the self-awareness level of like we started that in your drive Dude, we started pelting that thing with lacrosse balls and fucking
Starting point is 00:46:30 We were hanging out the windows screaming you loser That's fucking crazy. Oh man. That's wild Your girl's next. I told you we saw one. I think I said it's a guy who's definitely getting cheated on by the way Yeah, I saw a guy that he had his said just run Jeremy Which I was like, that's odd. He said just like big up a fucking male porn star Like that's what you're driving or that's like what you're at your your fucking knock around car. Yeah, it's crazy Yeah, it's a bozo. It's wild
Starting point is 00:47:04 But the bullet holes are a little bit different my stuff that was big into that stuff of like he's like I'll put this on Dave's car Dave will think his car got shot. You know what I mean? Like it was like those like there was like weird That exploding panic just like weird shit They like they you like I think you spent a lot of time at Spencer's gifts that felt like you know what I mean Now those candles on the other hand I've seen a couple of ants almost give themselves emphysema trying to blow those things out Those were a good time the trick candles, but you knew the second that's this fucking supposed to goddamn 4th of July on those cakes You knew right away. Yeah
Starting point is 00:47:38 All right for a couple of weeks. I think in around 86 87. That was a good time. I don't know That yeah, not my cup of tea now. No, huh? Just hacking along all over the fucking cake. I'm about to eat but we've learned a lot since the pandemic Sure, okay fucking rocks Uh, this one's from nick as it garbs to decorate your front lawn for Thanksgiving i.e. an inflatable turkey I don't hate it I'm big on that stuff, but Thanksgiving that's not a decoration holiday Hmm inside you got the centerpiece you could do like a fucking whatever, you know
Starting point is 00:48:16 You can do like stuff on the tables and the counter or whatever. Let me ask you this That's shoot away because we always would start with the Halloween Okay, you start with the Halloween decorations in the beginning of October Maybe a couple weeks before Halloween sure Then we would lightly transition into the Thanksgiving decorations, which you take away the jack-o-lanterns You take away the thing maybe leave a pumpkin or a gourd or something like that too But we always had the corn stock On the stock was big huge always had the corn stock on the mailbox
Starting point is 00:48:49 Sure. Well, that's more that's more seasonal. You're okay with that. Yeah, that's season. You're celebrating fall At that point. You know what I mean? I mean it was for the bounty But that I mean it gave your problem is the the cartoonish Thanksgiving rusted go rustic all day go like a fucking a gourd Sure one of those call it a thing of squash The fucking hand turkey for the kids all day long, which I gotta say I don't like those gourds, man They look sick. They're too
Starting point is 00:49:19 Too phallic for me. Go to the dermatologist. Get those warts lands. Well, you buddy. Jesus Christ It's a mandosol on that thing or something take that away. Yikes. Give me a nice pumpkin Get a fucking script of Valtrex and stat maybe a z-pack The hell are these gourds hanging out at, huh? Razorbird, I swear Fucking gourd with monkey pox I'll give you that. Yeah, it's like what I mean. That's not like a You know, whatever drives around and what looks at the fucking
Starting point is 00:49:51 Thanksgiving day decorations. No You know what I mean? Yeah, give me that that's what a parade you go to the fucking Thanksgiving Day parade to see that Which is really more Christmas The Thanksgiving Day parade Santa Claus is the showstopper at that. Yeah, but that's the end of it. Yeah, you're Yeah, but I don't even know what was in the Thanksgiving Day parade. It's all cartoons and fire. Oh, that's right Okay, and I'm thinking I think it's small town. It was just a couple of fire trucks and the Shriners When those boys came in the guys with the hats and their little cars
Starting point is 00:50:21 I always thought they were like Uh Who's married to one of the kennedys or who's a kind of schreiber? isn't that Maria schreiber. Yeah, I thought they were Schwarzenegger's wife. Yeah, I thought it was like their family going on. I didn't know what I'm still not sure to be are they the guys in the little cars with the hats. Yeah, dude The little zippers that used to fly around those things are bad. I don't think I ever saw them in person Anytime they were like this. I would hear it. I don't know who was booking the wilksberry day
Starting point is 00:50:51 Thanksgiving Day parade, but they were on point. We had to try dude. They'd be zipping around Man when those guys hit the streets look out. I would hear Stories of like our parent my parents would go out like the cousins would want like my aunts And they'd all go out like some sort of event or fun rate or something And you would I would hear stories of shrineers were there So I thought it was like a family at first like the follies the jankins. They were like the shrineers were there Toby can you give me a google? I thought it was a family for the longest time. What are the shrineers in the elks? I know what the vfw is the elks is just like a social club. I know what the american legions
Starting point is 00:51:26 I think the shrineers are the same way, but they do a lot of charitable stuff I know there's shriner's hospital and what one's marriage is I don't know shriner sounds shady, bro Shriners International is a fraternity based on fun fellowship and the masonic principles of brotherly love relief and truth I'll slip that one in there to you And the all-knowing glee corp We'll have to sign all your possessions over to zoltan Yeah
Starting point is 00:51:58 Fuck that dude What is it the the masonic the second you start saying masonic i'm out Later the masonic principles of brotherly love relief and truth that sounds like they're tricking each other off And what are the masons and sweet sweet come? What are the masons Is there they do something I thought they were the guys that were hiding there are three masons They're also a fraternal organization that that trace their origins to the local guilds of stone masons. Okay
Starting point is 00:52:32 Yeah, I don't know these guys aren't good either. Quick layers. I'll give you that. Yeah back in the day But that's where they would hide all the symbols. We shouldn't be talking about this Something to knock on the door real quick The bed in black show up Uh-huh. I don't like any of that stuff, man. Any of the masons the fucking secret societies. No, we love it. What are you talking about? It's the guy I mean, I don't like it in the sense that keep doing you just keep me out here You know, I don't want to know anything the Illuminati Nope. No
Starting point is 00:53:08 We should start our own Colt we got to have something you got to have like the cup of Christ or something you got to have something cash Hey, the people want to people want to mess with you. Uh-huh. We've got to get our hands on something We got a pretty big Boba Fett. Yeah. How about some nudes at Toadie or something? No, all hail Toadie You got to get like Hitler's UFO or something What you got to have something something weird like that. Yeah Uh, how do you guys feel about how elaborate halloween decorations have been getting when you were talking about the decoration I was thinking about the halloween lights like the orange christmas lights. It's great. It's great
Starting point is 00:53:40 I'd like I'm okay with that because it is very childish. It's very like haunty Haunted house type stuff. I'm I'm with all that like this one. Look at what they did. I'm with that Thanksgiving. There's no cachet to it. You know what I mean? There's no like Supernatural thing you have santa you have elves you have flying reindeer at christmas halloween. You got spirits witches goons Got what's a goon to a goblin the whole nine yards a deep cut? Uh, you're not going to get that are you old britches? Um Just pulled down my pants as you speak But there's no like
Starting point is 00:54:16 What do you sell? You know, there's no like There's no cartoon aspect. Plus Thanksgiving's taking some heat lately too. I think everybody just shut up and eat their turkey Keep it zipped. Don't be flaunting that stuff. Uh-huh. That's not the best history. If you know what I mean You see what I'm saying, you know what I mean? Keep it zipped. I know and there also Isn't anyone weirder on earth than someone who owns and operates a haunted house Oh, man. I worked with one a long time ago in michigan. I don't know where the fuck I was Hachi mochi he caught you under That's what he did during the day like I guess offseason or whatever. I don't know and he was like, hey, man
Starting point is 00:54:51 What are you doing? I was like during the day you'd like you can't be working on skeletons in july, dude I was bad. It was bad. I don't know. I could be into it. I just watched that Netflix movie with uh, I think it was marlin wanes who was in um, why do you say that weird marlin wanes marlin wanes? Because there's multiple wanes. Wish to shire wanes. Um, He's good. Uh, who was in requiem for a dream. Is that marlin wanes? Yes. Yeah He has a new movie with kelly roland and the little girl from uh, stranger things on netflix about halloween Derrick garish is coming to life cute as a button. It's fantastic Good stuff that has nothing to do with the actual reality of running a fucking bad haunted house
Starting point is 00:55:31 You watched a movie with famous people and you're like, oh, yeah, I could get behind that I like haunted house The fake ones not like I'll do like eastern penitentiary, but I'm not going into a real haunted house. That's the main haunted place Eastern state penitentiary You know many people died in that place I know but they got kids and stuff like that running around so it keeps the energy or maybe they aren't really going around When they're solo, I wouldn't go anywhere near a haunted house like a real haunted house Ever, you know, of course
Starting point is 00:55:59 um, but i'm just saying the reality of running like I don't know. It was uh, it was a tough to watch that was a tough reality to Uh, to see in person. That's all i'm saying. Hmm. Was to like go to like yard sales looking for like Props Was like a spooky carrot top. Wait, you worked for the guy? No, if you listen to the program I was working with the guy. He was a comic and in the office or whatever He ran a haunted house in like iowa or something like you know on like a big barn field I think it was all year round or for like, you know, like august to
Starting point is 00:56:36 November or december that's a good time though man pumpkin picking the hay rides. I didn't mention any of that Well, if he's got your romanticizing this, why don't you listen to what i'm saying? He's painting his addition to be spooky and have the neighborhood kick comes in. It was a fucking sad site I don't want to tell you Tell me more about your movie sysco. Sounds like a setup. Yeah Okay, uh, yeah, you can't decorate fucking that's no bueno. Um, no no bueno Love that Thanksgiving the whole day that Yeah, it's probably my favorite
Starting point is 00:57:10 One of my because it's low expectations. It should be mandatory though that everybody gets the friday off Everybody should have friday off every chef wednesday off too. Let's take a week. Okay, figure it out. You know what I mean I don't mind the wednesday because the wednesday you get done work. You have something to look forward to I know but it kind of has that christmas eve energy I know but you're you're looking at your very specific situation if you have to travel that day it fucking sucks I'll give it at so it's like, all right. Well, hey, we're gonna let you out of three in new york and you got to get to philly That night. It's like, okay You're you're fighting on the subways you're fighting on the fucking trains and you're trying to get an uber
Starting point is 00:57:46 You can't get an uber everything's all fucking jacked up. Meanwhile, your boys are all doing fucking key bumps at patties All right, here you go. Wednesday. So i'm told wednesday. You got to be back at work tuesday That's what thanksgiving. I'd go monday. Shut it down. You go monday. I'd go back monday You got friday saturday sunday. You're licking your wounds Okay, i'm saying That's all i'm saying Um hankering for some stuff and Yummy, uh, you know, it was really cool to see to get to give my wife
Starting point is 00:58:16 Her first thanksgiving of like she's only ever heard about the how good the meal is and i'm like, oh, it's gonna blow your Fucking oh, wow. What'd she think? Yeah. Yeah, she loves it It's great. That's pretty cool. Yeah, she's like how good is it? I'm like it's Better than you could ever fucking you could ever put your fucking little german brain together. Yeah, it's all right It's all right, but you're saying I can put gravy on everything It's a carriage. It's almost mandatory at my place Um, all right, this one's from chad. Do you think it's acceptable to skip in front of someone in line at a store? So you can purchase your items separately with someone you know that's absolutely unacceptable. Oh, of course
Starting point is 00:58:59 Of course, what? Of course, that's trash. Yeah, if I was in if we if we when I walked into a store together Uh-huh And I was in line and you went to grab something and came back here That's cool. Pay for this. You know here by yeah, yeah grab me that doesn't matter That doesn't know for sure. That's the that's the respectable gentleman gentleman move I while standing behind that Do get a little upset that this guy's beat the system. I realize
Starting point is 00:59:25 I'm it affects me in zero percent Except that this guy's not suffering with me in line. That's a couple thing That but the guy suffered in line somebody that that okay But me that is a unit right there if they came into the store together. They're one person theoretically But I'm you know what I'm saying The guy the head of you waited in line. Yeah, but I I'm not are you talking about a couple couple couple or two friends or whatever Yeah, I view the two friends is different. Really? Yeah I'm not saying I'm right. I'm just saying
Starting point is 00:59:57 If me and you walked into a store and then I went and stood in line the whole time Then you got to the line. You're like, oh, this is crazy long buy this for me with intention to buy two separate things like you're going to go buy your TV And I'm buying a bathing suit We're not going to purchase that together for two individuals making two separate. I wouldn't do with the tv What do you mean? No, I'm saying you're in line buying your tv that I'm like, hey throw these swim trunks on that That's not a big deal. I don't think I'm okay with that. I don't know because I feel like they're two separate purchases
Starting point is 01:00:27 Nah, I'm cool with that now if you were like, of course I'm cool That's if you are you joining me in the line or are you saying here pay for this? I'll meet you out front I think the question is joining you in line. That's yeah, that's what I'm saying No, the set the question is separate purchase, which is egregious. Yeah, I'm going even one step further saying I As a crazy person behind that I still go like fuck this guy beat me because he didn't have to wait in line Do you see what I'm saying? I'm not saying I'm right. Sure. I'm just saying that's how I feel Of going fuck this guy won because I've had to wait for
Starting point is 01:01:02 And obviously you got to To paint the thing. This is a long line. Otherwise you would just wait Right, you know what I mean? So like you're to wait in line. You've been taxed. I've been waiting here for 10 minutes Then this guy just comes in I get this and you're like fuck you you just won that bothers me The way I see it if one person is paying somebody can bring something up. Hey, I forgot this Here you go You know, I agree with you. I get that you're a psycho when you freak out. I would be I would be too But if you were I was looking if you were standing in line
Starting point is 01:01:33 Okay, and I was in front of you And toby walked up and said I forgot this and toby got in line behind me I paid for my stuff and left toby paid for his stuff in his left. That's gonna be a fucking problem Oh, yeah, I would say something. That's what this guy's talking about. I know. Yeah crazy That's unacceptable. He says he feels like he's like I feel like I've seen this a lot I probably wouldn't say anything because I'm a pussy, but there'd probably be some I that's so egregious I would I wouldn't I wouldn't be like, hey, well, you know, I'd be like, well, I would be like that's crazy Like I would at least have you kept some 70 year old vietnam vet with a fucking me fucking jack
Starting point is 01:02:08 I don't fuck with those dudes wearing those hats that I don't understand those dudes with all this stuff Hey, buddy, thank you for your service. Korean war vet vietnam war with those guys will knock you to fuck out Now that's shit, but like Yeah, no, I agree that That is the right thing, but in my psycho brain and go fuck you've You should have to suffer like the rest of us. What if it's a couple? What if a couple's waiting in line in front of you and that's a unit? Yeah, I'm saying he's like you forgot the milk. Ah, fuck I forgot the milk and she ran back up the milk
Starting point is 01:02:38 Of course, that's a unit. I'm saying two people who go in to make separate purchases I'm saying I would get mad if that guy was going to make a separate purchase But since the line so long goes by that let me ask you this I go that's fucked up because I have to sit here and suffer Like a jamoke. Let me ask you this what what kind of bathing suit will you get two piece G string which aren't back by the way Joe they wouldn't even go on away. They went away. They're stronger than ever Yeah, the thong the g string the thong This guy was walking on the pool with their butt hanging out. First song I ever downloaded illegally the thong song. Shout out to Cisco
Starting point is 01:03:15 Sucker Come get me if you want me federal government I owe hollywood about 10 million dollars I don't really steal a whole I don't pirate a whole bunch. Not anymore Even then subscription even then we didn't have a computer that could really handle it I'd have to do it in my buddy's house who had kate like if you didn't have cable modem at the time To download an album took Months I took columbia house for a ride. That was it
Starting point is 01:03:46 Yeah, but I mean they were expecting that. Yeah, shout out to hollywood video I'd rent the dvds and then pop hop him in my dvd burner Yeah guys that had dvd burners. That's correct. I remember some That's christ some kid andrew had one. I was like he might as well been the cia if he had one of those Holy shit. I didn't even understand setting up two vcrs to like People were doing that with like cky and stuff and i'm going. I don't know what the fuck I don't know how my dad figured it out. He told you he taped that stuff off of hbo
Starting point is 01:04:18 Well, that's that was a button that was just like a record on it Which we still didn't we've never my family has never recorded anything off dvd ever But I can wrap my head around there was a record and play button on the Vcr ours didn't work. I thought just the vcr rewinders were wild Man, you were over there ripping and burning body had one that was a was a race car. Sure they did I remember being like, what what do you work for blockbuster? Where did you get your hands on this new age technology? This one is uh from steven is it garbage to go to the exit of a grocery store go through the exit of a grocery store When you first walk in so you don't have to walk all the way around to
Starting point is 01:04:56 To the entrance to get what you need. Fuck all that shit. No not at all. That's bullshit Get out of here with that exit next no, you're I don't understand what you're saying. You walk. Yes, you walk right through Yeah, I remember finding out you could do that with just a little pressure It was when I was working at a grocery store that was you could like really fucking Uh because I think the one I used to go was two separate ones in and out so they wouldn't open You know what I mean? It was like the it was the proper like swing open door not the slide So you had to go through each one Uh, but then they like redid it or something and I remember being like what the fuck
Starting point is 01:05:32 This is I felt like the coolest. I feel like a bouncer. Like I don't have to listen to rules Excuse me. Yeah be bopping scat like you know the like, you know the passcode to get in when I was a kid though walking through the Check out the other way You felt like you were going in to do a bank job if you would go through like an empty one Yeah, you're saying to like cut through. Yeah, I work here. She's like you feel real fucking top The other bozos walk around me. I scoot through aisle four I do like to walk into the main entrance of the grocery store to get the full experience Especially in the burbs. They're real nice
Starting point is 01:06:08 Got the flowers over here to produce over here They're cooking something in the bakery. You see the deli guy in the back. It's a guy's going. Yeah They're deep frying some chicken somewhere. It's all right. Yeah, it's not too shabby. The roto's rolling around Love me a roto, but we gotta wrap it up gang. What a fun time. We love yous appreciate all the goddamn support We'll see you out there on our roads somewhere pick up some tickies Grab some cards pick up some cards. Do yourself a favor because they're going hot, baby Grab the cards for the supplies while the supplies last they are running low. We love you. We'll see you next week. Peace

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