Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Down by the Docks w/ Adam Rowe
Episode Date: April 3, 2023Are You Garbage presents the hilarious stand up comedian and podcast host Adam Rowe. Thanks for watching Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast. Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Foll...ow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/hfoleycomedy/ Live Shows: https://linktr.ee/AreYouGarbage PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://www.bonfire.com/store/are-you-garbage/ Ladder Life: https://www.LadderLife.com/GARBAGE Go Factor: https://go.factor75.com/Garbage130 Promo Code: Garbage130 Adam & Eve: https://www.adamandeve.com/ Promo Code: Garbage True Classic: https://www.trueclassictees.com Code: Garbage Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans?
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Quick tour update gang the state trashy tour is a cook and we're adding shows and we're coming
to a city near you bring the squad out and come see us. We're hitting New Haven, Connecticut,
Burlington, Vermont, new second shows added in both those cities. What? Then we're going to Tampa
Florida, second show added there. There you go. And Dania Beach, Florida, Raleigh, North Carolina,
Louisville, Cleveland, get your tickies now. You snooze you lose. See you out there. Welcome to
another exciting edition of Are You Garbage? The show where you find out if your favorite comedians
are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now here are your hosts Kevin Ryan and H Foley.
Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's new favorite podcast. This is
R U Garbage. Oh yeah. It's that little show we sit down with your favorite comedians and we find
it after you're to be classy. Yeah. After just a big old piece of trash. I'm your host H Foley
coming at you on a beautiful day out back here in the new edition. Tony's spending that cut still.
I know. Saw this morning she had dollar bills all over her back. I don't know what she was doing
upstairs in the bedroom but it wasn't PG. I can tell you that. My co-host is coming at you from
right next to me. He is the CEO of Are You Garbage. He is an international businessman. He's got the
guys on Wall Street Nervous and the guys on Main Street all rooting for him. Give it up for KJ.
Kevin James Ryan. What's up everybody. Thanks for tuning in. As always please make sure you
rate, view, subscribe on iTunes full video available on YouTube as you know those numbers are
cooking. Then obviously I have to say to this room the greatest gosh darn website of all time.
www.patreon.com gang check it out. It's the best website in the world. Yeah it is. And have a nice
quick shout out to our producer extraordinaire. The magic man makes us all look good. Works to
ones, works to twos, to threes and fours. He crosses the T's and he dots the I's. Now you get a
little peek at him with the Toby cam. Give it up for T-Bone McScroffins. Toby McBone everybody.
What up dude. What up T-Bone. Oh man the exchange rate on this guy we got near. We got some top
dollars garbage from across the bond dude. Shout out the lids. Let's go. Heavy hitter in the building
ladies and gentlemen. Kids holding up the western front all by themselves. Fucking cleaning up in
the european theater. Gang we couldn't be more excited to have our incredibly and I mean incredibly
special guest back with us again today. If you haven't caught his episode do yourself a favor
and go check it out. He is a very funny very successful stand-up comedian and podcaster.
He just released not one but two stand-up specials this year alone about to kick off a new tour and
of course he is the host of have a word. Give it up for Adam Roller. There he is on it to be in the
new guy. Looking sharp kid. What's up bud. Wearing out money well. I'm so jealous of everyone's
ability in this room particularly yours to just without missing a beat. Flawlessly broadcasts
like a monologue that you've improvised. He loves them. It's absolutely fucking insane. He's the best
in the biz. Best in the biz. I'm drunk. I got about 10 minutes in me. I'll be sleeping in a minute.
You can get him one of them white claws. Keep him awake. Brother congratulations man. Thanks for
having us Bach. Fuckin cook. Yeah dude. Yeah it's things are going well over. You decide and
I like to pop over here every now and then. Sounds like you're coming from another dimension.
Over here cleaning space money.
The one thing I do love about you I guess it's I guess it's the English thing is you look you look
you're very well put together sharp. Yeah you think so. Yeah where's that shirt. Where's that jacket
from. So this is from a shop in Liverpool called to Zootie. So they're like a chain of they said
like designer shit but like if you go in at the right time it's one of those places where they
sell designer stuff and if you go in when it first gets released like this will be like 400 pounds
but then like three weeks later no one's bought it but it's this was like 80% off. All right I'll
give you that. Like it's really good. So you're still a dirtbag. Like I'm quite liberal with
me money but I'd rather buy five things so I'll wait until it comes down a little bit you know
what I mean. I thought you meant if you're sneaking at the right time when the guy's grabbing his
lunch. Walk out with a five finger discount. That's awesome. Has there been any because we're
obviously you know bad with money. Has there been any stupid purchases anything you regret.
You were doing well when you came over the first time. Now you guys are really blown it out.
So the last time I was here as we were sort of discussing before was a bit of a shit trip for
me and I had a bad time over here break up with a girl and stuff and when I went back I thought I
was handling everything really well and when I looked back on it I was having a very glamorous
mental breakdown. That's the best kind of hair baby. So I got myself like a city like in Liverpool
we've got the most sort of sort after area is the docks like the Albert dock in Liverpool.
OK. I got myself like what a shit hole by the docks.
No body oil tankers. It's a nice looking dog. It's not just
like like it look it's red. It's not gray. It's it's it's pretty. It looks good.
Fucking Google it. Like it's it's it pulling up one day we'll have one day we'll have enough
money to live by the refinery. That sounds nice. When my number comes in I'm moving right to the
train tracks. You got a power plant view everything. Oh fuck.
Don't you know you just meet a guy and you're like you're my kind of guy.
I love it. So you were living over there. So I was I was living in a suburb and I just went
fuck this. I'm going to go and live in the city centre. Sure. On the docks. Flex. High rise
apartment. Three bedrooms. I live on my own. I've got a bedroom that's exclusively for sneakers.
Like it's just it's wall to wall trainers. And I did that and then I bought a car. So I
and you message me when I got it. I bought a Range Rover for law. Yeah. And it's fucking great.
Automatic and that's like standard in the UK. Sure. And it was just it's a few months when I
look back and go I I committed myself to two years in an apartment that tripled my rent.
I should have probably just bought a house. Sure. Put a little bit away. Yeah.
Wayne got drunk or something. He saved yourself a couple of a couple of quid.
So they're buying cruise ships. Fuck it. All right. That's what I'm talking about.
But like actual like just buying stuff. I'm quite bad for that. Yeah. If I see something
I'll just just get it on it. I'll just like we're completely. Yeah. Yeah. Why did that
was when I didn't have a I would have like 80 bucks in my account. I would go spend 50 at the
bar. Like I'm just bad with money. I'm just horrible with it. So it's funny. It was always
it always worked itself out. Yeah. I didn't pay my student loans. I didn't pay my fucking credit
card bills. My my cable would get shut off. It worked itself out. Yeah. So me and my best friend
is he's our Toby. He's our producer on the podcast names Carl. He's a when he got into
university neither of us went to university. Yeah. He got a student loan. Mine hadn't come
through yet. So I didn't get mine. So he had a student loan that he had absolutely no need for.
So between me and him we spent every penny of it going out seven nights a week for like six months.
So he he's got like two because eventually he went back to university and got more student loans
and he's got two student loan debts. Wait, they gave you the money and you weren't you weren't
rolling the school and you guys just kept the cash. They gave him the student loan and then
like a week or two in he was like I don't want to do this course. So I'm just going to fucking
leave. You've got the debt but they don't take the money off you. Yeah. That's all right.
Yeah. Right. So then around the beers after the 20 years ends up costing you like $18,000
an interest payment all to get fucked up for six months. Good six months.
Splitting it with his boy. That's all right. Right there. You get an A in friendship my friend.
I'll tell you that right now. That's fucking so love that. I actually so I ended up owing him
hundreds and hundreds of pounds because he wasn't just giving me it. He was like right well we'll
go tonight and I'll give you another hundred out of this. Sure. I when my mum so like we were
talking before we started last time I was on here there's a line that I get tweeted a lot from this
set of course. It's one of the funniest episodes. The ale took her because my mum was an alcoholic
and that took her when she died. I got left like 2000 pounds because she was and when I got it
that's when I paid car back and he he was like I'm I'd rather you give me it in 10 years. I can't
take your mom's last $2000. He's like I don't want this money. Give me any other money but this
money and I made him that money's haunted man. You can't fucking you'll get bad juju on you.
You spend that money. That's bad. I use my alcoholic mum's inheritance to pay off an alcohol
that's a little bit dead at the top. The upside down in a fish and chips.
Oh man that is fucking so funny. That's great. What what have you done since you've been here.
Have you soaked in any of the sites and he brought you see a Broadway show you hit any
landmarks. What are you doing by show. I'm a big musical theater guide. Really.
Appearance. Yeah. I went to see Hamilton a few years ago and just like this is collect
it. So I went to see parade the other night. I don't even know what it is. It's really good.
It's like a resurgence of an old one that's okay. And Ben Platt the lead. So he was the guy
at the original. And he's gone on to do a lot of stuff in like movies and stuff.
And it was like it's hard to get a ticket at the minute. There was like one ticket left
a single and luckily I'm on my own out here. So I was like I'll just take that.
I went to see that. I went to see a hockey game when see the Rangers against the Penguins.
MSG. Wow. Really good game. And I've just eight of good places. I went to cats late last night
and got the pastrami. I went over to Brooklyn got to Sweetchick got some chicken and waffles.
I went around to Freedman's had a steak eggs and fries at 9 30 a.m. because I texted to me
girlfriend. I was like hey I'm having this. She was like isn't it half nine. I was like
it's what they do. It's what they do. Americans are not. I don't know what to tell you.
Hey babe. I don't make the rules. You know what I'm saying.
That's all right. Did you fly over here up front. I did fly over here from but I'm flying back in
the back. Wait. Hold on a second. Wait. That's a dirtbag. We got it. It was cheaper to upgrade on
the way out. So it was like 350 pounds to upgrade on the way out. And I was like that's worth it.
On the way back it was like four and a half grand. Oh yeah. It's fucking wide. It's just not.
I can't. I can't justify that on my own. It's funny though.
It's gonna be the saddest trip home. It's gonna be fucking hung over 13 pounds heavier and sweaty.
Trying to explain to the flight attendant. I was up front all the way over there.
You remember me. You remember. Do you know what it is on the way out. I flew it like noon.
So no one needed a bed. And that's why there was so much like cheaper to upgrade on the way back.
I'm flying at night. Everyone wants to sleep on the plane. Sure. Okay. That makes sense. I'll
give you that. That's the price difference. I'll give you that. Yeah. What I'll do is I'll just
cause even I've got premium economy. Okay. So you still get all your drinks and some decent food
as decent as airplane food can make. Sure. So I will just get hammered so that I can sleep sat
off. Sure. Sure. Well you get drunk at the airport and then on the plane. And then carry on on the
plane. Take you back and on the plane. Until I just cannot see and then I'll just I'll sleep.
Sometimes they slow your role on the planes though. I noticed like they give you they give
you a drink when you get on. But then you got to wait till you get up to the cruising altitude
before they they reload you. Yeah. Usually by then I run out of steam. Yeah. Just buy some cans in
the airport and take them on with you in your hand luggage. I think that's illegal.
That's for sure against FAA regulations. I don't know what yous are doing over there.
Yeah. But like it is against the rules. But what they do is they go say you can't drink your own
alcohol on the plane and you just go oh well I'll make this my last one. It's already open.
Like what are you actually going to do? You're a smooth talker though. I would have panicked.
I'd be waiting for the air marshal to fucking tie me up. I get like a battle of Jamison.
I'm quite happy to always argue with people in like customer service roles because really.
Yeah. Because a lot of the time they don't know why they're enforcing a rule.
So I was in a hotel in London. Jesus. A couple of weeks ago and the whole
dog. The hotel's got like a really good hotel bar and like a restaurant to it.
Love a hotel bar. Shut up. Nice hotel bars. But it's what it's the type where people would
go to that bar even if they're not residents of the hotel. Right. It's called the Hoxton.
It's in Shoreditch. Okay. So I woke up like really hung over from we went to country to
country music festival and the country music festival in London. It went with my girlfriend
and her friend and her friends. Country music like American country music. Yeah. Yeah. No kids.
So Zach Brown man with the headland. They were great. And the next one I woke up really hung
over. So I put me shorts on and a T shirt. But I'm in the hotel. So I didn't want to put I didn't
have like my sliders or flip flops with me. So I just went down barefoot. I was like it's
and I'm on this customer service agent side and I got to the bar and I went could I just have a
two pints of Coke please. And then the guy who's like the major deal whatever comes over and goes
I can't save you with no shoes on. And I was like why. And he goes because you can't be in
the restaurant with no shoes on. And I was like but I'm already like I won't come back with no shoes
on. I learned my lesson. Just give me my Coke. I can't save you. I was like well I'm not leaving
without two Coke. Jesus. Because what you're going to do is you're going to make me walk
where I'm going to walk anyway if you give me the Cokes right upstairs and get shoes to come back
and all the Cokes and walk back with me. Why. Why are we fucking doing this. You told me the rule
that I didn't fucking know. And why would I know it. I'm just in a hotel. I'm hungover. I'm probably
still drunk. Get me two Cokes and I'll be out of your way and you'll be out of mine. Sounds like you
were for sure still drunk by the way. Did he give you the Coke. It was a big day. It was a big fucking
day. Okay. Did he give you the Cokes. He did you. Of course he did. Because he. He knew. He doesn't
want a barefoot guy in his bar. And he knew the only way to stop that happening was to give me
the Cokes. His policy has to go out the window. You're a homeless dude.
Got a homeless guy in here singing Zach Brown lyrics.
Oh man. All right. Damn. God. All right. Well I'm glad to hear things are going well.
That's good stuff. It is amazing that you guys did a show in an arena
and then your barefoot scream. I know. That's crazy.
I just there's been like this whole flip. I think COVID sort of accelerates it as well.
It used to be the customer is always right. And in the past decade, no, you're everybody's. Yeah,
you're wrong. It's completely flipped to the the workers always like because everyone's getting paid
fuck all to do these jobs. Yeah. Like people feel sorry for these people, which is absolutely
the right way to be sure. And in the majority of things, if someone's being a dick for no reason,
you should be on the side of the server who's on like three, four, five, six, seven, eight pounds an
hour. Of course. Because it's not fair. But when they're just deciding to take their day out on me
because it's eight o'clock in the morning and he's in work and he can see that I had a better night
than he did fucking. That's pretty bulletproof. I like how you put yourself on the side of the
working man. Yeah. But then you're like, I walk into a restaurant with no pants.
It's like, come on.
You can just say that like I'm so miserable now that like because handovers are like, I think
there's like a it's like Newton's cradle. Like the way she looked the better you were having
a sure. Yes. Yeah. And I look like shit. So he knew that last night I had had a good time.
And I think he was jealous of it. And I think that's why he wants to. This guy must be a billionaire.
Look how bad he looks. This guy must be worth a lot of money.
What the fuck's Newton's cradle, by the way? Newton's cradle is the, um, the dangling metal
balls. And if you click it for every action, there's a reaction. Is that what that's called?
Yeah. I always just thought it was a thing on my uncle's desk. I wasn't like that was the name
of it. Do you have a thing on my uncle's desk too?
I love fucking with those things. All right. All right. Let's, uh, let's settle here a little
bit. Um, guys, uh, as you know, when you sign up for Patreon, we will answer your Patreon
Patreon question on your garbage question. It's just the best way to do it. Uh, Patreon gets
first crack at it and we got some heat. It's tough to try to tailor it to, I'm not that well versed
in, uh, you know, in British culture, because we, we have a lot of American dirtbags, but I'm
curious to see, curious to see the crossover here. Um, this is from RWM. Is there currently any tape
on any remote controls in your house? No, but there is like missing bucks that I just, I've
just got like exposed batteries. That's, that's not good. That's, this is going to sound dumb.
Are your batteries the same as ours? No, that's fucking huge. You want, like my, my TV at the
most, the size of this table. I don't know. Their plugs are real weird. What the hell's
going on with those? No, fuck that. You think ours are? No plugs in America are fucking terrible.
They don't stay in the fucking wall. Oh yeah. Like the ones in the UK stay in the fucking wall.
But yours are monstrous. Yeah, but they stay in the fucking wall.
They only do have one purpose and that's to stay in the wall. I always feel like I'm about to juice
up Frankenstein with these things. I use a hairdryer because like if I just let this dry, it's just
fuck it. Go ahead of hair. Yeah, yeah. Keep the quaff. So I have to, I have to use it for the quiff.
Like the quiff. Okay. Yeah. Do you bring your hairdryer with you or use the one in the hotel?
I use, I always bring the one with me because if you, I don't know whether you've experienced
some hotel hairdryers, but I have, it's like having an asthmatic child breathe on you.
You smell that hair to somebody else's burning hair. It's grim. But yes, like I've been drying
me hair in the hotel over here and I've had to like plug it back in like three or four times
because it's just coming out the fucking wall. Yeah. Plugs are built to keep the thing that you're
using in the fucking wall and your plugs don't keep anything in the fucking wall. All right.
All right. I think, isn't it because they were like, there wasn't air travel. They're like,
oh, you're never going to like, they made it differently knowingly, I think. They were like,
oh, well, Europe has these and they were like, oh, well, you're not going to be taking your
toaster to Europe. Like what's whatever. Just who gives a fuck. I think that's what it was.
Mainland Europe has different ones again. What? Yeah. My wife's German. She had that.
It's different than everything on the same. It's very close looking though, isn't it?
It's closer than the states. Closer than the states. Yeah. I don't care which one we use.
It should all be on the same page. We should all be all driving on the same side of the road.
We should all be using, I guess, the metric system, right? That's the smartest one. The smarter one,
I believe. Yeah. And all use the same plugs. What's going on? We can't change it now. Why not?
It'd be fucking, do we have to replace all these goddamn cables in here?
We'll be fine to be another 50 grand. You're nuts. Are the batteries different?
They're the same. Exactly the same. Really? You're going to be fine over there. Do you have
double A's and triple A's and all that stuff? Yeah. Use the same thing. Yeah. Say, there you go.
We come together on something. And they got chocolate and everything. Really? Oh, yeah.
I think I know about British chocolate. What are you fucking nuts? Our chocolate's better
than the American chocolate. I don't disagree with that. I don't agree with it, but I don't
disagree with it. I like a Cadbury. Yeah. Oh, Cadbury's. Cadbury's are right. And if you ever go
to Ireland, there's a rig, like it costs you a lot for like a small bar, but they got the original
recipe Cadbury's, where it's like really expensive and it's even better. Oh, man. But Cadbury is the
best. Guess who's going to Ireland this weekend? Big man's got to get his handles on the pure stuff.
I do like a Tuberloan. You like a Tuberloan? Yeah. There are Swiss, no? But then a bit like
or German. It's hard for me to decide to buy one because I know it's just a challenge for me,
Joe. Like sure. Very hard. Yeah. The triangle's weird. Yeah. I'm about it though. Yeah. Do love
a Cadbury. Do you have the Cadbury cream eggs over there too? I don't like the cream eggs. It gives
me like a weird feeling at the back of my throat. Huh? I thought that was something they pushed on
the Americans. No, that they're not the riffraff have it. They're quite common, especially around
Easter. Sure. Yeah, they're all right. Yeah. Common ones are good too. And a couple of years ago,
they did like full-sized Easter eggs full with the cream. Oh, that's too much. Yeah. That's all
right. Yeah. Yikes. Kim, let's talk about ladder. What? Talk about leaving bozos holding the bag.
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factor, factor. Let's talk about knocking down two, three, four of those. No, one at a time.
But they're that good. They're that delicious. They're fantastic. Throw them in the microwave.
They're ready in two minutes. Oh, absolutely delicious. I know you bozos like to put them
on a skillet and do it nice. I do because I'm a goddamn gentleman. Yeah. I signed on the factor.
Sorry to cut you off. No. I signed on the factor way before they were a sponsor. It's just kismet.
I told us about them because it's brotherly. No, this was all me. Really? You used something
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They keep you a little trim. They take the decision making out for you. You know what I mean?
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episode. Of course. Love you. Love yous. Okay. This one's from you down with Vick. Same. We're in
the remote world. How many remotes do you need to turn the TV on at your house? Do you have them
programmed as one or are you jumping all over the place? No. So I've got, I primarily use the
TV in the bedroom now. Okay. And it's one, but it does fucking everything. It's got Netflix. It's
got Apple TV. It's got Amazon. And they've all got their own buttons on the remote. And will you
lay in bed? Are you sitting bed and watch TV? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Talking flat screen, right?
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Only bought it maybe like three or four months ago. And then I've got a very similar
thing in the living room. But that TV is a couple of years older. So I have my Xbox plugged into that
and the Xbox does a lot of the apps. Gotcha. That's the bypass. Were you eating the bedroom?
Yeah, but rarely. Really? Like if I'm watching depends what mood I mean, sometimes if like,
I like like the NFL. So if I'm on the show really late in the UK. So if I'm up like late after the
show, I'll watch that in bed with like some food I've brought back after the show. Sure. But like
if I'm having like my dinner, then sitting there cutting a steak. I don't hate that with the NFL
because my girls from Hawaii and when we go over there, they're real early in the morning. Yeah.
Which isn't too bad either. There's something different. It's nice. But late night NFL. That's
all right. But the bars are usually closed down by then, right? You have to watch it at the house.
No, our bars, especially in Liverpool. So people don't know this. Liverpool as far as I'm concerned.
And obviously I am biased is the best city in the UK. New York is a lot more similar to Liverpool
than it is to London. Okay. And you can get a drink in Liverpool 24 hours a day at a bar.
That's pretty cool. Like the there might be like an hour or two where you can't
where like it shuts at 7am. But then by 9am, everywhere else is back over breakfast and stuff.
Everything shut down on 11. No, no, no, no, no. Like if I was going on a big night out with my
friends, we probably wouldn't be in a bar till 11. No shit. We probably pre drink until 10.
Do the bars over there get a good crowd for the football games and all that stuff?
You mean for like American football? Yeah. Not for the Super Bowl yet. You have to like buy tickets
for the Super Bowl. Like every bar to be like, we're showing the Super Bowl and you'll buy tickets
in advance because people want to go and see it and they make a night of it. Sure. For a big
Liverpool game, that's probably crazy. It's fucking insane. It's nuts. You're a Liverpool,
you're a Liverpool fan, right? Die hard. Yeah. I see you post pictures at the games. I'm like,
I want to get, if I want, I want to go, I want to go to a game, a Liverpool game with you.
Now is the time I'll take. Oh yeah, I'll take you. Seems like a fucking clue. One of those stadiums hold
ours. So Liverpool's at the minute is 56,000 and before the start of next season, it will have
been increased to 61 because they're, they're adding 5,000 new seats. So maybe everything about
football in the UK is the songs. Are they passing out sheet music? How are you guys learning these
songs too? You just learn it. Like if there's a new one, yeah, like the, so our main like home
fans, so there's obviously four stands. You've got the main stand, which is quite quiet. There's a
lot of tourists there. You've got the stand opposite that, which is the Kenny Dalglish stand.
He's one of our greatest ever players to stand named after him. Again, there's less tourists there,
but it's a similar sort of vibe. The, the Anfield Road end is where the away fans sit and there's
a lot of like arguing there, but the main sort of die hard fans is called the cop. That's our
main stand. And if there's a new song, the cop will just sing it like 20 times in the first,
like two or three games that it becomes a song. And by the end of it, you just know it. Yeah.
Like the core fan groups who know the song immediately. And also the internet's helping
that now because like the most recent song that came out last year is they're all like
parodies of like famous songs. So there's a, there's a Beatles song called I feel fine.
My baby's good to me, you know, she buys me diamond rings, you know, she said, so
I'm in love with her and I feel fine. I got you. So the, the manager, the voice on
did the whole thing started from the beginning. The song and dance man. He said he liked the theater.
Didn't just hit the chorus. You got like him with a verse in there. This guy's showing off.
Our manager, Yegan Klopp, his song is a parody of that. Okay. So it's Yegan said to me, you know,
we'll win the Premier League. You know, he said, so I'm in love with him and I feel fine.
I'm so glad that Yegan is a red. I'm so glad he delivered what he said.
Yegan said to me, you know, I just picture three guys somewhere crippled,
fucking drunk, trying to figure out those words to line them up. So I will show you it. I won't
get it up now because obviously we're recording, but as soon as we finish, I will show you that
is how that song started. So there is maybe eight drunk Liverpool liens in a pub in Ben Fika.
What rhymes was when
But they're just hammered just fucking.
Fucking great. See that part is so fun. It's such a shame that soccer is so goddamn boring.
Yeah, take that from this kid. Um, obviously not now you're a high profile guy, but as a younger
man, did you ever mix it up at the games? No, I nearly got into a fight
against Leeds, but it was because of a comment one of my friends made. So Leeds and Liverpool,
they don't hate each other. They also don't like each other. And we were leaving the stadium and to
get to where our coach was to get home. You had to walk maybe like 15, 20 minutes. And while we're
on that walk, we're getting towards our coaches. One of my friends went Leeds is a shit hole. I'm
never coming back. And then behind us, there was maybe like 30, 40 Leeds fans who heard it. Yikes.
And we just got really, really lucky. We were unlucky and lucky at the same time. I think you
told us about this. That's right. Okay. Yeah. So they, um, they were looking for a fight with
fans who wanted a fight. Sure. We just, we were essentially, we were in the guards of strip.
Like we, we just accidentally walked right along the tight road. Yeah. We got out the way and
there you go. Gentlemen.
Take us back to the docks now.
With my many remote controls.
And my huge batteries. All right. This one's from Billy. $10 new homie. Never have one read.
Is it garbage to save your beer can so you can recycle them to buy more beer?
I, do you guys, what's your recycling situation over there? Because I know the Germans save all
their bottles and go return them for the deposit. Oh, we don't do that. You don't do that. We just
like, so we get two different colors. They just chuck them at Leeds fans. This place is a shit
hole. I'm out of here. They have to be forward to do any damage. We freeze them and show them and
throw them at the other team. Yeah. There's two different colored bins, ones for general waste,
ones for recycling. We don't get any money to recycle. What about like the homeless people?
They don't come around again. They don't recycle them. They go in the regular trash.
Hey, you're on your own buddy. He's quick. So there's no program where if you return the bottles
or cans, you get money. No, very few anyway. Like there's a guy who delivers like soda on a van
street to street and he gives you like 20 pence back. If you pretend that they're big bottle,
a big glass bottle. Damn, you still have that over there? Yeah. Oh, that's probably good soda.
Oh, it's fucking great. It's the best. What's the brand? Is it just a Coke or whatever? Is it?
Oh, no, no, no. Like it's like some local. I think it's called Daile, D-A-Y-L-A. That's the name
of the company. Okay. And like the cream soda is bright green, like toxic looking shit. Yeah.
Dandelion and Bear Dock and Iron Brew and Orange Aid and Chedi Aid and it's great.
That's what I'm talking about. That's all right. Iron Brew is fucking amazing.
Yeah. Yeah. It tastes like bubble gum, dude. Yeah. Good for a hangover as well.
Really good for a hangover. I don't think I've ever even had it. I've only been to England once
for two days. I was drunk for most of it. It's a pretty good time. Iron Brew comes from Scotland.
Gotcha. Oh, that's right. You spent time in Scotland. So Coca-Cola is the number one
soft drink in every country in the world. They're not fucking forget about it. That it's sold in
apart from Scotland where it is beaten by Iron Brew. Keep it old school. We've got to get some
for the set. I got to test some of this stuff. Yeah, that sounds all right. Can you get it here?
You could probably get it here in some sort of specialty store. Yeah. Yeah. It pops up every
night again. If you want Homeland Security crawling up your ass, you kidding me? Try Coca-Cola over
here, young man. End up on a no fly list. Yeah. Hold for a little cream soda. I'm all about it.
That's good stuff. All right. Let's see this one's from Tommy. It just says,
yo, how long do you keep the film on the TV screen? If you buy a TV, it comes with the
like the thin plastic or a phone. Before I even turn it on. Really? Yeah. That's the best feeling
in the world. It obscures the view. Like you're buying a brand new TV because you want it like
sure. The top end 4k, 8k. Yeah. I'm not putting a fucking film over this. Like what?
You keep it on your phone too? No. I was just describing the film that I was talking about.
Okay. No. I also take it off. I don't think I take it off before I turn it on. I don't know though.
I love that feeling. Oh, I love the feeling as well. Oh, it's up there with that.
Will you save the box to an expensive electronic like a TV or a computer or a phone?
For a little while. I don't know why, but I keep the phone one. Yeah, we all do. I have three of
them at my house. I don't know why I'm doing it. Do you have an iPhone? Yeah. The iPhone box is very
nice. It doesn't feel like a regular cardboard. It has that like slow open and closed. So you go,
this is expensive. I could hold on to this for a little bit. Yeah. I don't know why I'm keeping
them, but I've got like three or four of them. Yeah. It's dirtbag mentality. I've got boxes for
phones I don't have anymore. Yeah, exactly. You don't have the actual phone. It's a good box.
Oh, that's all right. Okay. What's a what a what network provider do you have over there? Who's
your say E E E. Yeah. So Kevin Bacon is like the guy on the obvets for you. That's where his
career is gone. He probably cleans up good money over there. We're a mint mobile family over here.
Yeah. Ryan Reynolds shout out to him. How do you feel about him buying the team?
I desperate to get him on to our podcast because that team is like an hour from us.
No shit. I'm constantly hitting his PR up like you're an hour away. Come and talk about this
with us. He just got caked up. He sold his owns part of mint mobile, which is a prepaid sponsor
of ours prepaid cell service. And was it just sold for like a billion dollars or something.
He owns like 25%. He owns the gin the gin brand. Yes. Aviator is it? Yep. Yeah. And
like rexms like they're like four tiers down. Yeah. Like there's a tier system with the football
in the case you got the Premier League, then the championship, then league one, then league two.
And I think they're in league two. And they are like that if they climb, which they will,
they're gonna they're gonna be everyone's second team and everyone will have a rexm jersey and
everyone will like when you type in what league if autofills is rexm in. There was a there was a
Netflix. I don't know what's on Netflix. It was on I think welcome to rexm or something. Yeah.
Welcome to rexm was on. And I think FX or something because it's always Rob McElhaney has a
deal with FX that he was just like, Oh, here's this TV show like all Americans are like,
now that'll be my team type thing. Smart kids are making money. Kids are making money.
All right, let's see here. This is from Keaton first time posting.
Are you garbage if you wash all your sheets, towels and clothes together in one load or do
you separate them? I just separate them by what I'm doing after they're wet. Do you know what I
mean? So I've got a machine that washes and dries. Gotcha. It's like a two in one. Sure. So like any
t-shirts or shirts, I can't wash you can't tumble dry them because then they'll shrink.
Sure. But like socks, underwear, and like sheets and jeans. Let it all roll. I'll let that. So you
wash your jeans and your sheets together. Yeah, really? As long as the sheets aren't like white,
right? And then they go in a white one. You wash them in cold water or hot water?
30 degrees, 40 degrees. That's hot. Yeah, right? Yeah, if he's talking Celsius. Yeah, I am. Wait,
now, the way you're supposed to do it, I thought was, towels and sheets are okay,
but you got to do them in hot water. You're washing your jeans in hot water?
Kids got a tight fit over there. I'm letting them know. I am built really strange. I wear 32
waist jeans and then like double XL tops. There you go. I'm built like a golf ball on a tee.
Yeah. Dude, if I wash my. Hey, barrel chested. If I wash my pants in hot water, that's it.
There now rags because I'll never squeeze in those.
Do you guys mind if we just take a two minute break? Can I go to the toilet?
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Now back to the show. Back to the show. Okay. Let's see here. This is one I ever thought of.
This is from Jack. What was the speed limit on the street you grew up with? You grew up on?
Whoa. That's fucking weird. The faster it is, the trashier the neighborhood.
Okay. So it will have been 30 miles an hour. 30 miles an hour?
That's respectable. Yeah, because I guess mine was 25. 25 would be residential.
I grew up, yeah, but I grew up on a cul-de-sac on a estate.
Like not an estate. A estate over here is like... It's different.
Wow. Like it's like a... I thought you were flexing for a second.
The exact opposite. It was a rough neighborhood with like terraced houses and
like I lived that sort of halfway down a cul-de-sac.
Okay. 30 miles an hour, that's good.
Yeah. I don't know people.
I grew up 55. That's tough, man.
Crossing a four-lane highway. Trying to get a chocolate milk.
That's a fucking brilliant question. Yeah, I never thought of that.
There was one time after my parents got divorced, my dad moved to a house like
temporary, like rented a house and it was on a main road, like proper fucking dudes flying down
the street main road. And I remember my mom be like, don't go in that goddamn yard when you're
over there, you're dead. Had to fucking sit out, look at the window. I was like, son, dude.
Deer crosses the road, somebody peels off. I think it's worth saying people didn't obey the limit
where I go. Like, artificially, it was Tainty. In reality, it was whatever the driver was comfortable
with. Of course, all night, day, whatever.
My dad used to freak out because our street, there's a, there's a highway
atop of our neighborhood. And during the day when people go to work, they would cut through
and cut through the neighborhood. They're cutting through the neighborhood,
doing like 50 down the street to be up there and losing this fucking mind.
We had a lot of like motorbike gangs as well. Really? Not like, not like Harley Davidson,
like I'm so unlike a lot of kids. Yeah, kids would get like a Kawasaki and
sure they'd be like just up and down. Yeah, with balaclavas on and yeah.
Yeah, it's trashy. Yeah, sounds like a nice neighborhood.
That's good. Well, you are you a speeder now? You got the nice car? You got the range?
Are you keep it tight? Are you letting loose? I let loose when I know that I can.
The highways, like you sort of get used to where the cameras are. And if I know I've got
like 10 miles, then I'll just... That's right. The cameras can give you a speeding ticket over
there, right? That's the only way you really get it. The police are very, really just there.
Nobody's pouring it over? The cameras, yeah. Really? Like you, if a policeman sees you,
yeah, but they're just not very off and on the most ways. And if there is, you would slow down, but
yeah. So you'll just randomly get it. You could get a ticket in the mail saying here's a speeding
ticket. Yeah, but you know because you know where they are. Yeah, I got jammed. I was in Switzerland
with my wife and we got, I mean, I got like fucking 15 speeding tickets. It was like thousands of
dollars too. I've got nine points. I don't know how the license system is. We have a similar point.
Yeah, it's 12 and you banned and you get three for the like for speeding. You have nine? Yeah.
You're right there, baby. Yeah. You should stop speeding.
I had to go yell at customer service people at a hotel lobby bar.
How long did they ban you for? Six months first and then it'd be a year if you got done again.
A year? Yeah. Damn. Brits hold a grudge. Yeah. I just had to do a safe drive. I got a ticket up
state, New York speed. I was flying. I was doing like 90 and a 65 or 50. I think it was 55.
I got jammed up and they made me, it was a small town and they made me do a
safe driving course. Oh, I've done one of those. It was fucking online timed six and a half hours.
So you had to sit there for like an hour and then like it fucking sucked. So I did that online,
one of those and I fell asleep. Yeah. But it's done like on Zoom. So like. Oh, really? Mine was
just like an automated course. So I woke up. You're in the car. I had been kicked out of the meeting
and I logged back in and I went, well, and he goes, did you fall asleep? And I went,
yeah. And he goes, you're not allowed to do that on the course. And I was like,
okay, he goes, we'll call that a yellow card. Oh, there you go. He said, if you do it again,
you're out. Yeah. I was near get banned. There you go. Damn. That's all right. It's like 8 a.m.
And I was hungover because it was on a show that I... It's also like you're not dry. It's better
off doing it there than behind the wheel. You know what I mean? Tell me some fucking slack.
Also, it's just such a fucking stupid course. They're just like asking you,
it's like you're doing like grade one driving. It's like, if a sign says 40,
how fast are you allowed to go? And you're like, 40 miles an hour. They're like, correct.
Oh, good job. Depends on what the cameras are at.
All right. This one's from Boston, George. $20 shareholder. Shout out to them. Are you garbage
if you've been manually brushing your teeth with a broken electronic toothbrush for over a month?
That's not good. They're not good either. They're smaller. What's your toothbrush situation?
Same batteries. Two hands to hold it up.
I just use a regular. A regular guy too. Because I know I would be this guy.
I've been that guy. I just won't replace it. And they're not as good as the... Without the
shaking and moving, those things... It's not as good as a regular one. They're brutal.
And the fucking heads get so old and so disguised. I remember I took it to my buddy,
Bad South, and I left it there. He's like, did you leave your toothbrush in the bathroom?
I'm like, oh, fuck. Yeah, I did. And he sent me a picture. He's like, you need to throw this thing
out. Like this is... You should not be putting that in your mouth. It's... Yeah.
These are new batteries. Well, it was also back in the day when it was like,
it was expensive. Now they're like, you know, the cheaper disposable ones. But then you had to get
the heads and the heads, you could only get it certain places and shit like that.
Change it like that. Fucking yeah.
Are razor blades expensive over there too? You can get like five, like Gillette Mach 3s for like
10 pounds. Remember when they were like so expensive?
They were crazy expensive for a while. People started stealing them.
Yeah. But then those companies like Harry's and shit, like all those companies that did
like the dollar a month or the change, all that shit kind of fucking.
It was a while. The Mach 3. Now I remember Mach 3 was fucking huge.
Everybody had those. They're the ones I use. But I'll use them twice and then I throw it away
and I use the next one. It says you can use them. You can use this for like three months.
It's like, no, you fucking can't. Kids looking at the docks.
Have you ever used someone else's razor? I've used like a girlfriend's razor.
Because like I hate this that I've got right now. The neck thing. Like to come here today,
knowing there's cameras on, I was like, I should probably shave this, but I just didn't go and
get the thing. Like if I'm going on like a date night with me misses or if I'm going out with
the guys for the pint, like I know we're going to be taking a group photo. Just tighten it up a
little bit. Just if we're away from home in a hotel in London, and I just love that fucking
way to fuck off. If she's brought a razor and I haven't got one, I'll just clean it up. Yeah.
Yeah. That's all right. The lady ones are nice. But use that somebody else's razor as much of a
disgusting dirt bag that I am always skied me out. I've I've I didn't know what I was younger.
Your dad's maybe. I was using my brother's like regularly. And one point he's like,
he like walked in. I was shaving with him. What the fuck are you doing? He's like,
if you've been, how long have you been doing? I don't know, like two years. Fucking dirt bag.
I remember like he would use it. I wonder what goes through blades every two weeks.
He would use it and then I would just use it like right. It would still be like wet. I'd be like,
this doesn't feel right. But I didn't know, man. I was young. Do you use razors like that down?
Or do you trim? I've I used I mean, I've done now I'm a man scaped man, if you're asking
depending on me to depending on the you are still like a social worker down there.
Show me where he touched you. I use man scaped. But then I use man scaped on like the
the Mons pubis and like on the what the bit above your cock, below your stomach. Okay. The Mons
pubis. Isn't that a lake on the moon? Didn't Magellan get hung up there one time? Holy shit.
That is the boner with that section. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So I use man scaped there and then around
me bowls and stuff. But then sometimes I'll take the Mac because like I get the occasional hair on
me cock. Oh, yeah. On the shaft. Yeah. Just occasional. Like it's not like it doesn't
look like fucking Wolverine, but like it's just like, it's just like it's like a cigar as well.
It's having cocks got eyelashes. It's just every now and then it's just like,
you should pluck that. Oh, that's gonna hurt, dude. I'm not plucking anything out of there.
I'm not plucking me cock. That's a screamer. I'm not plucking me cock. That's the greatest
sentence ever said. I'm not plucking me cock. I don't care what those tweezers that are.
Yeah. Did your, did your guys' dad teach you how to shave or you had to figure it out? Shave your
pubes. What you're going to want to do is pluck me cock. No. No one taught me anything ever.
They were just like, Mike, no one talked to me. They just said, go. I, at one point I was using
a blading cream on my ball sack. I was, I was nicking myself up pretty bad. I think my dad did,
but he shaved it. Those guys shaved every day. They shaved different. Like I got to be real.
It didn't, it didn't translate well. He showed you how to deal with a Bowie knife.
Yeah. This is a man's shaves. Tell me how I shave. Yeah. Did your dad teach you how to shave?
Any life lessons from your parents instilled on you? Did you have the birds and the bees talk?
So my mom tried to have that with me and I told her to go away because my mom and dad had split
up. They broke up and my dad was always around, but there was like a three or four month period
where we didn't see much of him because him and my mom's relationship had become so difficult.
And then it was fine after that. But in that period, I remember I was in the bath. I mean,
mom coming in and was like, I just, you know, there's things your dad should be to, and I just
went into it and I just went, just don't. Yeah, just get the fuck out of here. Save it. Save it.
I'm in the bath. Yeah, I just jerked off. I know what's going on. I got it. It's funny.
Have you ever been caught by your parents, uh, masturbating?
No, one time I did. So we had this thing in the UK for a while called lads mags.
Okay. They were like soft porn. So it wasn't like, um,
hustler. It wasn't like the short thing. More playboy. Yes. Hopless or something.
Yeah. Well, there was one dinner or something like that.
Going for a walk in the park. It's a guy picking her up. There was one called zoo and one called
nuts magazine and I would get both of them every week. And then what I done with them,
I used to keep them under the bottom drawer of my bedside table. I know that move very well.
Of course. And one, one time I came home from school and my mom and dad had done like a spring
cleaning of the whole house and they'd like move things around in my room. So they'd obviously
picked it up and there was just nothing there. And then I was playing table tennis with me.
We had a table tennis table in the garden and I was playing with them and he goes,
so I found your magazines and I was like, yeah, thought you would have just, uh, throw them away.
Yeah. It's your serve. Shut up.
And he asked me who's been buying them and I was like, I was buying them myself. You can buy
those ones. They will give you them. Oh, were you buying them yourself? Yeah. What were they called
again? Ladsman's. Oh yeah. It's all right. Ladsman's is nice. That sounds refined, gent. Yeah.
Guy's smoking a pipe or something like that. I need to shabby. Like a little soft court. Nice.
Sure. Hey, I don't discriminate. You know what I mean? I like a nice story in a video as well.
I need a good storyline. You can't just go straight into it. No. You can't just click it
and have them just be fucking straight away. No, never. I gotta know why the plumber has his pants
on. You know what I mean? What happened here? Kippy's a good girl. Yeah, he got a wine and dine
me a little bit. He can't just fucking bend me over and go to town. Excuse me, sir. I'm a lady.
All right. This one's from Jonathan. I saw this recently by you on the road. Ever use an ironing
board as a TV tray or table? Yeah. Really? I'll put my laptop on it, put Netflix on the laptop,
and then use it. If I'm in a hotel that shitting doesn't have Netflix on the TV,
like I'll use my laptop as the TV. And absolutely, you get the ironing board out,
you put it near the bed. Yeah. I think that's trashed. I think that's just genius.
Will you eat off the table? Will you eat off, use it as a table to eat?
I don't think I've ever done that. Well, maybe I have stood up drunk.
Also, my favorite move when I'm in a hotel, if they've got a bathtub, is I'll get in the bath
and I'll put the laptop on the toilet seat and watch something while I'm in the bath.
Well, you'll take a bath in a hotel? Yeah. That's pretty wild. That's not the cleanest thing in the
world, especially if I was just in there. That's rough. I got news for you. That's trash. That's
one of the questions we ask. Have you ever taken a bath in a hotel? Not in like a luxury hotel
with a woman and bubbles and everything. You'll just take it. You'll just draw a bath and sit in
the bath. If a hotel's got a bath and it looks clean to the naked eye, I'm getting in.
I don't know, man. Can I say this? Swimming in the Nile. The TV at hotels has really gone downhill.
It's just fucking garbage. I guess they assume you're just watching shit on your phone or your
laptop. But, man, it's a real tough look. You get like two stations. One of them is the fucking
hotel station. Do they do it where you have to jump through the menus and shit? It's like,
it's naughty. You can't just turn it on and go. Yeah. It's like the buttons don't work. It fucking
sucks, man. Yeah. But a lot of hotels are sort of having, like, they're getting sort of makeovers
and stuff and they're getting bigger, better TVs and smart TVs and shit. It's good. So what I mean,
he has got Netflix on the TV. Really? That's pretty good. You have to use your own pass code?
Yeah. Oh, see, I don't like that. But I'll log out before I leave.
It's not your bank account. I'm not leaving off of the next guy.
They know something. I don't like it. Yeah, I couldn't do that. If they should, if they should
just have it. Why can't the hotel just have... You have to have an account in every room.
Oh, yeah. That'd be fucking, it'd be spending $50,000 a month in fucking Netflix.
You don't have to. What are you, a Boy Scout? What are you talking about? You never shared your
but still even two or three. You can't have unlimited 900 rooms. Yeah. High it can't pay for
one fucking subscription for every fucking hotel room they have. Hey, believe me, we're all playing
seven bucks a month. We got 14,000 people using it. That's all right. Played money ball.
This one's just nuts. This is from Molly, $10 homie, never had one read.
As my dad would cut the toes off his tennis shoes to make open-toed sandals,
he left the sole intact, just cut the upper leather part off. Yikes. That's hillbilly
shit, I guess. That's not, I mean... That's crazy. See, that used to be hillbilly shit,
but now he could charge like $300 on Etsy. Yeah, probably now it's like this fucking, you know.
Yeah, that's what that shit is now. The world's changing.
The world is fucking changing, you idiot. Poverty chic is like a thing. Oh, dude,
it's crazy. You see people on them, it's like... Dude, I popped into a thrift store, I was killing
time. They're called an vintage store. It was a fucking, you know... Buffalo Exchange.
It wasn't Buffalo. It's that one in the village on like Four Street or whatever. I've been shot down
at a Buffalo Exchange. You have Buffalo Exchange over there? So it's like, it's like what Kevin's
talking about. It's like nicer, like a nicer thrift store, but you can exchange your stuff.
You can go in there with your old cool stuff. Like higher end stuff, yeah. Yeah. They shot me down
on a pair of sweatpants. Are you trying to buy them or sell them? I'm trying to give them back.
Trying to make a move. What do you need? Trying to get liquid over here. Liquid ate some funds.
I don't think any... Cash out my sweatpants fund. I don't think any phrase is how to
big a glow-up in the past like two decades than the phrase second hand. Oh yeah. Like any in second
hand I was seeing is like, oh that's vintage. Yeah, I know. It's just someone owned it. That's what I'm
saying. I walked into the studio and it was like a jacket. I was like, oh this is a cool jacket. It
was like, I don't know, from the 90s or something? It was like, I don't know, some sort of fucking
leather, well, leatherman or members only or something. I'm like, oh it's cool. It's like fucking
$380. $380? Like fucking get out of here with that shit. Yikes. Not today. Not today. What can
I ask members only now? Get them jackets behind Teebo and make a couple of bucks on him. Yeah,
there's my fucking beard. None of them fit. That was a problem. I was buying these fucking vintage
beard jackets online. They're like, it's a triple XL and then you buy it but it's from the 80s.
So like people weren't that fat back then. A double XL was way different in 88 than it is today.
And apparently I'm like a nine XL in the 80s. This bears jacket's an XL and it's like a child
small dude. I'd be like nine people in the 80s. You know what's funny is I pulled that red one
out of the bag yesterday or a couple of days ago to put it on the rack. And I was like,
God damn, this is what he squeezed it into. No, no, that one came out of the box. I didn't even
attempt. I didn't sleep that night. It's like a toddler. I didn't attempt to put it on. I just
put it back in the box. It came with and shoved it in my closet. My wife's been begging me to get
it out of the fucking house. I can move that for you. A buffalo exchange. Yeah, there you go.
This one's from Ryan. Is it garbage if you smoke weed out of something not meant for it?
Me and my buddy once rolled a joint out of a receipt paper. Yeah, you shouldn't be smoking receipts.
You smoke weed? No, I never did but recently I went to Amsterdam with the podcast boys.
There you go. I had a fucking great time. Really?
Me and Carl both had very different experiences on a similar level. So I just couldn't stop
laughing for hours and he went whiter than I've ever seen anyone go. He had to go to sleep.
Did he? Does he smoke weed a lot? No, neither of us do. So that was a good thing for our podcast
viewers. They were like, the two lads who don't do it are going to do it properly.
Go over your fucking blitz. I've seen the footage. I don't remember all of it,
but I'm trying to explain to people that I don't understand how my hands work.
So I'm like, why can I do that? How is it working? What's happening between here and here
that is making me be able to do that? And then we went to a Chinese restaurant,
you know, like the bus boys collecting all the plates. I was screaming at the top of
my voice, this guy's got the best job on the fucking planet. He could just eat people's
leftover food. He doesn't need to pay for food. It's the hungriest guy in the world.
12 years old. This bubblegubber rolling on his teeth. Did you eat it or did you smoke it?
It was in like a big bag thing. Oh, like the volcano thing. The volcano, yeah.
Wow. You never sounded more like a cop right now, by the way. Smoked snort. Did you eat it?
We used to smoke exclusively and we knew it was bad for you out of a coke can. You take a coke can
and you dent it. Like an aluminum can. I thought that was coke. Are you gonna crack?
Yeah, no, you also smoke crack that way. You're right.
It's not exclusively for dirt bags who smoke weed. He may or may not have been smoking crack.
In high school, we did weed and we knew that it caused... We did weed.
Yeah. Who's the cop now, dork? Where did you score your stuff?
I poked these up against the wall. You got anything sharp that's gonna poke me?
You been drinking tonight, sir? No, we used to do the coke cans and we knew.
I remember the guy who used to get Alzheimer's was like, yeah, if I could, what are you gonna do?
Yeah, we used to... I remember people would say you smoke out of... If you smoked out of like metal,
they said it would give your lungs arthritis or something. I was like, 10. I'm like, who cares?
That and aluminum bowls. I made a lot of aluminum foil bowls of my day.
10ers, yeah. Wrap it around a pencil and then pull it out and then...
Also good for crack. Yeah, that's also crack. I think you're a crackhead.
I am not. You guys know when you're smoking crack.
I live by the docks. What are you talking about?
You ever any beef with any neighbors or anything like that?
No, at my building as... I know you had the issue with the guy with taking your trash cans and shit.
Oh, he moved me bins, which is another home run of a home run. He moved me bins!
But at the new spot, no troubles, right?
No, because we've got like a trash shoot. So like, you don't even see your bins.
It didn't have to be with the bins, anybody.
And it's also like, they're Airbnb in a lot of the rooms because like, they can't fill them.
Tourists and stuff like that coming in. Do you like that? It's gotta be not great.
I don't know what to say. Like, I just... If I'm in my apartment, then I'm in my
apartment. And if I'm out, I'm out. I'm not in the communal area. There's a lot of shit.
Well, you do Airbnbs on the road or you do hotels or what do you do? What do you like?
What do you prefer? Because we flip-flop a little bit over here.
I prioritize hotels just because I trust the system more.
I don't disagree. You know what you're getting? You're paying a corporation, not some fucking guy.
Yeah, it's just, it feels safer. I don't know why. I've asked, depending on sales,
can I get a bus for my tour? I've asked Live Nation,
instead of doing hotels and hiring a car, can we get a tour bus with a bed in it?
You gotta shower somewhere though. They have it on the bus. Oh, really?
Like a proper tour bus. Wait, so in your tour now, they drive you,
you have a driver to the... No, so we would discuss some budget and I was like, I want to get...
This guy's cool. I want a support act on every show.
And I want me videographer at every show. And I'll pay them day rates, obviously, but also
I'm going to ask them to do the driving. I hate doing long drives.
I was like, so the support act will be on this fee, but you're also doing the driving to the shows.
And I was like, but that's three hotels a day. That's why we started doing Airbnbs.
We travel with five of us, between me, Foley, Toby, Luke and our opener.
Plus you get to goof around more when it's an Airbnb.
Yeah, but I just because of that, I was like, is it more cost effective to get a bus than pay
three hotels? They really are. But like, if because the tour is going to hire a car as well,
they're going to hire a car for the tour, out of the budget, and then they're going to pay for
three hotels at that point. It's like, does it get there? It probably will get towards similar
pricing. It's just cool. Let's have a bus. It's fun. Dude, we did it with Bert for two or three days.
It was fucking fantastic. I don't think they showered on the bus though.
You don't always want to get a hotel just to freshen up a little bit.
Right? Were they showering on there? They will be.
There is a shower on there. I don't know if they did. I think well, I know we showered at the venue
the one time when we got there and then we showered. They did have us. They had us a hotel room,
not to sleep in though. So you would just stay on the bus the whole time. You would shower,
do everything in there. That's what I assumed. But maybe you're informing me stuff that needs
to reevaluate. I don't know though. I mean, I would love a fucking AYG tour bus,
putting across America, breaking down. You got to stay on brand, baby. It's a yellow school bus.
All right, let's see. Let's do one or two more here. Then we got to wrap it up there, gang.
This one I never thought about. This is for Matt. Is it garbage to open presents at the
restaurant table when it's someone's birthday? No, that's normal. I think it's kind of normal,
but I could see how it could be portrayed a little trashy. We always did it. I feel like a bigger
as a bigger thing too, though. I mean, if it was just my immediate family, we would do it at the
house. You're supposed to open the presents in front of the person who gave you it. Sure.
So if they're not going to be coming home with you, you've got to do it at the dining table.
Yes, that does make sense. In a bag with a little paper, I think would be all right.
Are you still getting birthday presents? No, multiple. My girlfriend got me a lot of
really great birthday presents. Well, Christmas is what I normally do. I'll have my dad and
my brother over for food. We'll get all each other presents, get me girlfriend quite a bit,
and then the podcast team, we all do Christmas presents as well. So what we do is we film
just before Christmas. We did the Have A Weard Christmas. Sure. Christmas episode. I cooked
dinner for everyone. We didn't do it in the studio. We did it in. So in my building, there's a
there's a communal kitchen or whatever. Yeah. So I just hired that for the night and we filmed in
there. I did dinner for everyone. We all did presents and then we released that at 6 a.m.
Christmas morning. So I was like, if you're alone at Christmas, spend it with us. He's a good
shit this Adam Rowe. Still an Adam. Come in this AYG Christmas. If you're alone, hit me up.
That's all right. All right. We got to wrap it up, gang. Buddy, this has been so fun. I love you,
man. Thank you so much. Congratulations on all your success. Thank you very much. You got the two
specials out. Two specials starting. Anything else you want to focus on? Yeah. Plug away. Plug
the specials. Plug everything. If you're over in the UK, tour starts in October. It's just Adam
Rowe.co.uk. You can get all the shows there. The two specials that I've got now imperious
is my last stand-up tour from last year. It's just a traditional hour to stand up my
sort of stereotypical bit. Juicy is one long story and I have to say for legal reasons,
it's fictional, but I think that's been the most well-received. It's very fictional.
That's been the most well-received bit of work I've ever put out. Awesome. I've had thousands of
like big paragraph messages about it going fuck. So I didn't realize it was going to have that
effect. I knew I was the most proud of that that I'd ever been of anything else. That's sick.
But it's really come across. So if you want to watch anything, go and watch Adam Rowe Juicy.
It's on the Have A Word podcast YouTube channel. Thank you, brother. Love it, man.
Congratulations. We love it. Keep doing what you got for him. Guys, we're also all over the road.
Shows are selling out. We're adding second shows. Get those tickets before they are gone.
Thank you so much. We love yous. Gang, we love you. We'll see you next week. Peace.