Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Family Dinner w/ Kippy & Foley
Episode Date: December 14, 2023Are You Garbage is back with Kippy and Foley for a family episode to answer your garbage questions from Patreon. Its a fun one! Thanks for watching AYG Comedy Podcast. Love youse guys. Come to a live ...show! NEW TOUR DATES: https://areyougarbage.com/ Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/hfoleycomedy/ Live Shows: https://areyougarbage.com/ PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Pretty Litter: https://www.prettylitter.com/garbage Sheath: https://www.sheathunderwear.com/ Promo Code: Garbage Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans?
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Attention attention, New York City!
Oh baby!
May 9th we're doing the Town Hall Theater in New York City for the AYG live show.
Biggest show we've ever done!
Stand up comedy plus we play a little AYG with the crowd.
Grab the squad, come out and see us.
Yeah gang, all tickets are available at rUgorbage.com.
Get them now, they're gonna go fast. We have a lot of the seed here.
Welcome to another exciting edition of...
Are You Gobbage?
The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash.
Now here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.
Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's new favorite podcast.
This is Are you garbage.
I get that little show we sit down with your favorite comedians and we find that if they grew up to be classy
Yeah, they're just a big old piece of trash trash trash. I'm your host H. Folly coming at you on a festive day
We're out back here in Tuddy's in the new edition Christmas season is full swing. Uh-huh
My co-host is coming at you from your dress for Halloween. What the heck are we doing here?
You know what I looked in your eyes and you weren't getting it toady just like
My coos is coming at you from across the tables what we call a family episode here in the community
Just the boys the bozos and the homies just to what we like it. Give it up for Kippy, Kevin, James, outlaw Ryan.
Hey, what's up?
Thanks for tuning in, gang.
Please make sure you rate, review, subscribe on iTunes, full video available, and
YouTube as you know, those numbers are true.
Real cooking.
Cooking.
And obviously the greatest website of all time, I didn't like that.
W-W-W-W.
Now Patreon.com slash R U garbage gang, game go over there you get all your stuff you need
We're on a fritz over here
Somebody pull me out blowing me up you got the full some prison blues on your mind over there cowboy
How about a nice quick shout out to a pretty fraternity into a pie
Why you dress like a pumpkin?
It's just polo
I believe Tim Dylan has the same one as well
Okay, I'm the Tim Dylan you my friend are no Tim deal. Yeah, not
Man, he's been killing me lately. Hey, it's good
Good how about a nice quick shout out to our producer X Jordan Addy old magic man
Works the ones to choose the threes and the fours he crosses the tease and he dots the eyes
Kippy maybe dressed up part, but he's the fastest gun in the East,
giving up for Kibo and McScruffins, Toby McMullan everybody.
What up, dude?
What up, T-Boot?
Really trying to work that denim on, big man.
I mean, yeah.
Test it well in the focus groups.
Who, Patty?
What's he wearing?
Go ahead, give me, he bounced me three bits, go.
Hey, that patty Foley,
really living her best life out there.
Sure.
Woo, tripping the lights fantastic.
Traveling, staying extra days.
Okay, Jersey and Traveling.
It's down in Texas.
It's down in Delaware.
She was down in Texas.
Oh yeah.
She's doing spots at the motor show.
Hahaha.
Kicks making moves, I tell you.
Do you know Joe Roos?
Hahaha. Do you know my fat son?
I would want to see it's
I got a little something I want to get into later on
It'll a little more hard feelings ask but you know
I like that we can roll our sleeves up and get into it. I was out to dinner with my fam
A whole lot of 13 of us. Mm-hmm. You got me
You got my wife you got my my mom my sister brother-in-law their kids brother sister-in-law their kids
That is a lot of chicken tenders and butter noodles. Oh you ain't lying
Shout out to it by the way. What's that the chicken tender? Oh, man
I'm always too treat no to nuggets or anything the fries
Sure, but whatever the kids get I'm dabbling it you pick it up this check kit now 13 people what are you nuts?
I'm upside down in a house and the burbs pick it up check
um I get me in the four little ones I could have I could have
uh who's drinking only Shirley temples I get to fucking five five Shirley
Dumples and eliminate every time? I get to fucking five Shirley temples in eliminate every time.
Did I get him? Yeah.
Really?
Shirley Tams and a little one don't like him, she gets eliminated.
How many they allowed to have?
Just one.
It depends how many...
It depends if they're driving.
I think I got big wheels outside.
Did you got a meeting tomorrow?
In those instances, the parents are relaxed.
We're all at the one end.
We're having...
It's kind of,
and they're old enough to just order on their own.
That's nice.
No shit.
I don't know.
Wow.
It's also I think at that point, it's like,
We got one.
I think it's like the wheels are off.
My, all the adults are drinking.
So it's like, hey, finally, you guys talk to each other.
We're down here.
We got one.
And that first one has, I don't gonna tell you guys,
that went down quick.
I was never a fucking ST man myself.
Whatever you got to say to.
Takes.
And I had no government.
You didn't like a Roy Rogers with a little cherry juice in there?
I don't know what that is.
It's a Shirley Temple, but with cola.
No, I was going to Roy Rogers.
Coat, screaming.
Yeah, two strolls, so I can get it down quicker.
What is that?
So I can mainline this thing.
That grenadine's no joke.
Have you heard of a dirty Shirley?
All right, what's a school of one?
Is it just vodka in there, probably?
Yeah, sir.
So, right, okay, we're having a few cocktails,
meaning the adults, right?
I'm at the end of the table.
Head of the table?
No, no one's at the head, I'm at the end.
Okay.
Right, I'm on the flank as you would call it.
All right.
I'm the last guy in. I'm quarter back in a little bit because that's where the head, I'm at the end. Okay. Right, I'm on the flank as you would call it. All right.
Right, I'm the last guy in.
I'm quarter back in a little bit
because that's where the waiters come into.
You know what I mean for kind of everybody.
I've assumed head of the table status.
Yeah.
I've, I've, me and my brother all flip flop on it.
Oh yeah.
You take it, you take it, you know.
Still not picking up the check though.
What?
You gotta pick up the check if you're at the end of the table.
Not at my house. No. I asked for a high chair. you know, still not picking up the check though. What? You got to pick up the check if you're at the end of the table.
Not at my house.
No.
I asked for a high chair.
Keep things even.
Keep it, keep it on an even keel.
Get a boost through seat.
Oh, it's going on.
They put a chair on the infamy.
It's like, you want to fit in the booth man.
I asked for it.
I'm in boost though.
That's going to work.
I have, I haven't run across a booth that I couldn't get in in a while.
They're not comfortable.
You're part of the booth.
I mean, there's a waffle house that would like to speak differently.
I push it out.
If it's locked in, I wouldn't fucking, what is this?
I'm fucking panic room.
I'm gonna say we'll give on this.
We use this grace. I'm fucking say we'll give on this, will you? He's his grace.
Yeah, fucking Salt Chaker in your belly button.
Um, so waiter, newer, it seems newer,
little flustered, definitely not the man
for a 13 person taste.
Sure.
And I get, or, you know,
come in together all at once.
Yeah, bang.
Bang, Sid and butt, we're also like,
and he was kind of doing, he's like,
hey, we can get the kid stuff in now, get them situate, kids stuff in now Get them situation guys can chill drop it. It was good. I think he was just you know, it wasn't a
In his defense you got it you got you got that's it that's a two-man job
Especially getting the order and getting everybody situated sure
And a manager did kind of come over and help flex he had run it. It was he did a good job, but it was a little
He was a little just forgetting stuff and, you know,
he's like, dude, at one point, which we don't care.
Like, we're not a fucking, we don't make no noise.
How do you forget when 12 of the 13 people
all ordered the same things?
There was a lot of burgers going around.
It's just checking bombs, as far as they I could see.
So, I mean, we're all blue, you know,
blue collar working class, people,
everybody's weighted tables in my family, everybody,
you know, something, so no one, and it's also like, hey, this one we're just chillin working class. People, everybody's weighted tables in my family. Everybody, you know, something.
So no one, and it's also like,
hey, this is all we're just chilling, drinking.
Like, you know, we're not like,
we don't have a show to get to.
We're like, uh, we're catching dinner in a show.
And we're like, hey, the show starts at 8,
like, we're chilling for three at whatever.
Like, there's no rush, we're chilling.
So the guy is just a little wonky.
And like, you know, he'd leave and we all be like,
ah, what the hell is that all of it?
You know, it's just, you know,
he's just making it weird the whole time.
So, he kept forgetting drinks and I get that because he'd come
and he would be with my family.
He better fucking, hey, I don't keep the chicken
more solid, give me the fucking,
give me the fucking Bud Light.
Put the silver one on the back burner.
Just keep the fucking man, that's coming.
So we're drinking beers and I'm pretty heavy into the business.
Well, this is where we he keeps forgetting them. So he'd be like, he'd be like anything else.
We're like, Oh, that one IPA or that. Oh, and he go over. Yeah. And it's just, you know,
no one's holding it against them. He's in the way. You run and dry at certain points.
Oh, I now once I realize the slowness of it, I get ahead of it. You're doing two, not
two, but like if I'm halfway done and someone elseess of it, I get ahead of it. You're doing two? Not two, but like, if I'm halfway done,
and someone else is getting one, I'll be like,
throw a bottle on that, though.
Sure.
So it gets down to the end, and I order,
we're like wrapped up at this point, and I go,
can I get just one more bottle and he goes,
and my brother goes, yeah, I'll do a,
he was doing an IPA or something, Corona or something. So he's like, yeah, so
Five minutes goes by we're talking, you know, whatever. He comes back
Check dropped with the check and goes
If there's nothing else, you know, here's the check and I go I'm just still waiting on that
Bud Light, uh-huh and
He goes I brought it and I'm like I
Yeah, I've got to think you did and he goes I can assure you sir
Oh, I brought your Bud Light and now I'm like you just threw down. I'm like well where is it? I'm like I don't
through that I'm like well where is it I'm like I don't nine year old the other tables I've got a cherry in at the plate I'm like it's really temple I'm like I
didn't you know I'm like I didn't get it I didn't I don't have it at that point
you just say I will can I have another one I so then he goes I can I was taking
a back I think is that I can assure you you were drunk I was trying to pretty
fuck that's it and also I might add it I don't know I was drunk. I was pretty fucked up. Yeah Also, I might have I don't know. I
Serious. No, no, I don't think I don't think so but the cans are a bottle of draft
I'm gonna place you going to just giving you cans at the table
What the hell kind of gin-jewying you you get a aluminum bottles
Things put him out of socks game. It's going on here. Wait. Are they are they drafts drafts? Oh
You're drinking butt like drafts.
They were galing, damn.
God damn what?
It's brutal.
No, there is kind of have that in the bottle.
Draft.
I'm a can man myself, but at dinner, I class it up a little bit.
Um, dude, to me, there's only certain things you can drink in a bottle.
At a day, it's got to be a elevated beer or a corona.
So you can't be drinking it.
I think a straight Budweiser always looks good on any table.
I agree. Wait, why corona?
It's a little festive.
What do you mean?
It's a little dicarona, never draft.
Bottle.
Yeah, but yeah, corona is made out of a bottle.
That's why it's like that.
With the question, but I was saying why is it,
why does corona cross the acceptable?
Because that's a bottle beer.
You don't pour that into a glass.
I'd be with you on that.
I don't know if that would look alright.
I think, I think an American.
The lime classes things up.
Let's not get into the classroom.
So, Corona is fine in a bottle is what I'm saying.
All right.
But if you had a nice Italian joint, you can't have a corona.
You could have a nice bottle of wine on a menu.
All right.
I'm not bringing my own.
All right.
Right?
No.
Okay.
So he goes, an Italian place with a Corona tables whack.
Dibble, then why are they,
I don't think you're serving Corona.
You got a peroni, oh, okay, I'll give you that.
Yeah.
I would say an Italian restaurant is in serving caramans.
Fell enough, probably a peroni.
Yeah, probably a peroni.
Gentlemen.
Which looks all right on the table.
What about Heineken?
Heineken, heineken.
Heineken, heineken.
But yeah, Heineken, I think Heineken got a thing.
With a glass, at the bottle and the glasses there.
Especially this time of year.
Sure. Oh, a Pilsner glass for the,
a Frosted Pilsner glass when I Heineken.
Good night.
Around the holidays.
Woo, woo, woo.
I'll give you the Christmas spirit.
They always give me heart,
I have them linked to Harper and indigestion
and throwing up because every,
that's every beer they've ever made.
Every time you go, they only, that's the only beer they served at the
after hours clubs in Philly so you go from two you drink and whatever and then
you get there and I was I shouldn't have been there you know I'm like bubble
it up already and I try to try to hammer down it's like it's like going down like
rocks yeah so he goes I can assure you, sir. I brought it.
Damn, what the fuck? What's at the attitude? I know. Why not just go?
It's a monster check, too. Oh, big check. And he goes, he goes, I don't,
Hey, my mom's not paying. She didn't slave to about to get her
about an adult son's drunk takes for me to get this attitude. But it was also
one of those things where like everybody kind of turned away, because it was like,
oh, it was weird enough that he put it.
Yeah, they always do.
There are only two words in the service industry that would give you the confidence to say
to say something like that.
That's automatic retuity.
Yeah.
It's true.
Party of 13.
That's an auto-gratting percent, brother.
Yeah, it's true.
I'm dragging it in, I'm getting paid.
And it's already done. And that means he didn't get deviled. The family was like that. That's true. I'm dragging it in, I'm getting paid. It's already done.
And that means he didn't get to vibe.
The fan who was gonna add a little extra.
Yeah, we were on Bud lights and chicken fingers.
I don't know what to tell you, kid.
13 people, 885 bucks.
You drew the short straw, man.
That additional gratuity line's getting redacted.
What a black stamp.
That's what it makes it. Yeah, sir. two of the lines getting redacted. What a black stamp. Who make it there?
So I, I'm like, that's weird and everybody's like,
oh, it got like 10s.
And the manager's, and I go,
if you want me to add one, I can.
And I was like, nah, no need.
But you didn't, now I'm like, you didn't bring it.
You know what I mean?
Like, you just think you know your beer intake enough.
Shh, I would assume so.
In my head, this whole conversation is happening
while you're holding two beers.
That's it.
You're a liar, sir.
I got to in his feet like a gorilla.
Also, we got to a bar after that,
and I sculled the first one.
I'm like, maybe I did drink that beer.
Geez.
I'm like, I looked at how quick I deleted that one.
I was like, either way.
Either way, you just go,
oh, do you want, I can grab another one for whatever.
Like, yeah, as a server.
He threw me, he's like, when I were in a debate,
and I'm, it's not fair, because I'm drunk.
No, no.
And so, are please put your shirt back on.
So I'm like, all right. And then, all, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I dove on the grenade and was polite and you know, just move forward. He then goes. So then the manager is next to him and here's this.
And the manager said the other table, like, open a bottle of wine or something.
And the manager goes for refined people.
The manager goes, check your right pocket dickhead.
He goes, I'll buy a beer if you need one.
And I went, you'll, what?
I go, what? For now Now now I'm offended financially. I'm offended as an alcoholic
Let me run up by your mom. Yeah, I can buy you a beer if you need one. I go who I can buy you a beer
I go I can now I can buy now. I'm like now. I'm doing that thing up on our credit. I can buy a beer
You know what I mean like mom
Let me hold 20 you pull a purse up on the table tell me
Dead Paul I can afford a beer if you spread it over these
See this is discovered cards sir. Hey, when do you guys submit these damn American Express?
I got to move a couple things around
Yeah, and I go no no, that's okay, and he goes now it's a sit now all the other tables are like it's a and I'm like no, man
It's okay. I go he said two time. I'll buy a beer
If you want me to buy you a beer I'll buy you a beer
I go even if you are the manager and you're trying to smooth just say,
I'll let me grab you a beer. Don't say you'll buy me one.
Because now you've introduced money and do it like I can't afford a beer.
And don't tell me I can't afford something because I'll buy ten of them.
Yeah, I was fucking flabbergasted.
Huh.
It should be on the house.
I'll get you one on the house.
I'll grab you a beer.
Yeah, I'll not even that job grab you a beer. I got you.
Oh, yeah.
Or just go get it and just put it there.
There you go.
It's a fucking bug like draft.
What do we talk about?
Two nickels?
Yeah.
Me a break.
I know them.
I know them lines are dirty, too.
I was thoroughly embarrassed.
Whoa.
Yeah.
I can assure you I brought your beer.
Also, if you need me to buy you one, I will.
Will you wear that gene jacket?
Where's my finest black D-shirt?
Did this come across mom's radar?
Yeah, everybody.
Dude, it's a whole back, we're in like a back garden of this plague, you know, the outdoor seating.
And do you know anything about the finances?
Was it, was the gratuity at it?
All right.
Yeah, 13, yeah, that's added.
Okay.
Uh-huh.
All right. But that's as far as you know.
As far as I know, yeah.
And I think I even-
Did she take any offense to it or?
I mean, everybody was just like,
that was crazy fucking awkward.
Like that, like that could have been of every one of those-
That's not gonna affect her though.
She's still good and she's gonna do the right thing always.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I think we even juiced them again on top of it.
God damn it.
Yeah. I mean, even did well. We just copped a fucking dude at the end sure. Yeah
Oh, I you know, and I understand it's just fucking get me to beer and let's move on
Why calls it scene? You know what that means you look like a bozo. Oh, yeah, dude man not good. No
No, this guy's gonna think I can buy a beer do you remember when the check was dropped where it was put in front of me?
Really? Yeah, and I went see that's interesting. Yeah, he thinks I'm paying for it
Yet he's still gonna fucking stiff me on a beer. I mean, I'm guessing 13 people that's probably
It's well over 500 creepin towards a G. I think it was like seven eight hunch
Yeah, and he can't
get it puts it in front of you, huh? So he had the respect thinking you were paying,
which he was wrong. His guy's been wrong all night. How can I trust him? He thinks I got
eight hunch for dinner. Holy shit. And then I still not buy in these not no just as a because you know
I'm a dirt ball and you don't slap the hand that feed you so if I'm if I'm even if the guy's a dick
Not saying that you were
But it's here it's in you, 80 I can assure you
I'm not
If I was a dickhead with blood.
But if I'm putting the check, even with the 18, with the gratuity added, I'm still
expecting a little juice.
So I'm not going to fuck that up just yet.
Unless I've ruined the meal, which I've done plenty of times when I was working.
Sure.
Just fucked it up.
Just forgot everything.
But if I'm handing it to you,
now if the check was already dropped in front of you,
in front of mommy,
and you pipe up,
then it's like,
well, I got it.
What it was ordered prior to this?
Yeah, but still,
it's like he dropped the check,
and I'm like, oh, give me a beer.
Dropping the check in front of you and then giving you attitude is crazy.
Yeah, that's how you deal with a guy like that guy got nothing.
This guy's playing by his own fucking rules man.
But it is what it is.
And you know, just thoroughly embarrassed at the whatever.
To toss your hair or anything when you drop the check. Bull night fucking rubbed on my ear. You don't need no one
I don't want you pissing the bed late. I'm gonna surely temple on buddy
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And I don't want to let anybody down. I don't know if it's just that I'm getting older if it's the ozempies or what it is
I'm switching to heroin
Let's calories switched
I can't do IPA's anymore. I know yeah, I'm I've been off them for heroin less calories switched
I can't do IPAs anymore. I know, yeah, I've been off them for a year.
I can't unless it's gotta be 33 degrees.
It's gotta be screaming.
Screaming cold.
I don't like the way they make me feel the next day.
I'm like, mum, first of all, they fuck me up.
Like with Bud lights or what Bud bud heavies or PBRs,
like I can ride that dragon.
I can manage them the whole time.
IPA is the exponential growth around like seven or eight
where like each one is another three.
You know what I mean?
Like it's compounded annually or fucking daily on you.
Yeah, I like a golden ale.
I was drinking Kona golden ale.
Ooh, nice. Sancten, bro. Yeah, I like a, I like a golden ale. I was drinking Kona golden ale. Ooh, nice.
Hang 10, bro.
Yeah, dude.
All right.
Yeah, tubular.
But all that aside, we got a goddamn family episode game.
Yeah.
You guys know when you join a patron,
you can, uh, we'll answer your garbage question.
Only airship is the best way to do it.
Patreon gets the first crack at it.
Shout out to the homies.
Mm-hmm.
Uh, all right.
This one's just funny.
This is from Garfield, Lasagna everywhere.
I had while pulling your putt.
Where a hat like if you that's your two not ready for that.
I feel I've ever had a hat on.
You're masturbated huh.
That seems to you're either.
If I'm all charged up and I like go into my room and lay down and go to work
But you don't take your hat off you got to have your hat. That's we that's comes off in the middle of it
That's like having your shoes on what you never done that with my shoes on yeah, I
Don't think so. Hey, that's like shaving you go in you just get it done. No, he's a nice lady like to candle he sets the mood.
Huh, you gotta give me nine bucks.
Shoes for sure.
I don't think.
And hat I would say maybe.
I feel like I like I can somehow visualize me in the middle
and like I take my hat on.
It's easier.
I got a war helmet on.
Can I trouble you for the Waffock Code?
I'll be back in a minute, partner.
You watch my horse.
Yeah, no, that's crazy.
It's a casual experience for me.
Yeah, no, no shoes.
No shoes. No shirt and no service. Really? no, no shoes. No shoes.
No shirt and no service.
Really?
Yeah, no shoes, no hat.
Huh.
What did I know of?
You never just had to get it atty and just go on and
done your business?
But where?
I don't have shoes on in my house.
Yeah, hat on.
I'm just picturein' like a guy with a trucker hat and a truck
with a bench sheet in front of a lake for some reason.
Yeah. Sunglasses on for sure.
Really?
Oh, that guy, are you?
No, me.
Oh, yikes.
Guys, please, face the loose.
I don't know.
That's just, it seems real, like you're trying to hide who it seems like criminal to me.
What?
With the hat?
Get to the skies.
Hold down low.
Get a fake beard on.
Yeah, I don't get, I don't like it.
It's a little too not relaxed.
Huh, all right.
Definitely garbage.
I mean, yes, for sure, I have weird.
I mean, the first thing I do when I get home
is I take my hat off if I'm wearing a hat.
I'm not sitting on the couch wearing a hat.
I wear it inside, forget that it's all wearing it
and sometimes.
Yeah, I mean, sometimes, but like as a rule of thumb,
I can be like, watch and hat are coming off when I get into a domicile
I'll wear my fillies hat sometimes when I watch if I watch fillies games at my house if you're masturbating door in a fillies game
No, you got have you seen Bryce Harper? Yeah, good point. Oh, God if you are wearing a hat
I feel like you got a flip it to the back. Yeah
You're still owning over the top
Have you ever had an intercourse with a hat on that's when you flip it to the back. I don't think so
Yeah, beanie
Beanie outdoors in the winter
Jesus, where are you Alaska? What the fuck who's doing that?
Outdoor in the. God love you.
It's too cold for me.
No.
Highly do indoor games.
That's our certain time of the year.
I like a dome.
You're nuts.
You kidding me?
How do you like dealing with the wind?
That's like, that's like we're white after labor day. Uh-uh
Ah the patio gets closed early at the fucking head foley's you're nuts. Yeah, Jesus Christ
I have enough trouble to do if it's fucking perfect conditions. I need the habitable zone
On that same tip. This is some Kyle everywhere a beanie over a baseball hat. That was a look for a while.
Crazy.
I why did for sure?
Junior high, skating days was remember the Beanie with the brim came out. That was a fucking game.
Oh, the Tom Penny.
The Tom Penny.
Why was it that?
Uh, Tom Penny.
He's a pro skater who rocked the Beanie real visor.
Yeah, they were.
Oh, the radar hat?
Yeah. Yeah. I tried wanted to
Make that work for me. It would took a very certain guy. You had to be slender, I feel something
I was like too bitch. It just didn't work as radar or Riley so I was referring to from mass
You wore one of those or big lots of dreads if you had a bunch of dreads in there
Uh-huh, yeah, maybe pull it off one of those or big lots of dreads. If you have lots of dreads in there. Uh huh. Yeah.
May pull it off.
But I liked it.
I was on paper.
That looked cool.
Cause you can like casually go to the back
to side with it.
I mean, they were dirt.
You were not a classy guy rocking one of those.
Uh huh.
You were as a kid where it was like,
you definitely have single parent type.
They get a cigarette tucked in there.
Yeah.
I would do that too in a beanie.
Really?
So you can see in a beanie working.
Man. For sure. That is. There in a beanie. Really? Sagan a beanie, working. Man, for sure.
That is.
There was a long time when I was working with my family's construction company.
There was a long time when I was sagan the year was like on, on back.
Sagan the year is all right.
I still do it like around here, like whatever.
Sagan the, Sagan the beanie or a Sagan the visor turned backwards.
Just doing that. What? One guy ever pulled that off. Noor turn backwards. Just doing that.
What?
That one guy ever pulled that off.
No one's ever.
Crazy guy killer.
I also, I want to say too,
that there was a thing with the pack of sigs
in the beanie flap for a while.
Do you remember that?
I could have just been my buddy's brother did that.
No, I can see that in like a world,
like a Vietnam guy with his sigs up there. Sure, it was kind of similar to that. No, I can see that in like a world like a Vietnam guy with this thing's up there. Sure, which kind of similar to that.
I can do that a gas station. Where you from back in the world,
McMullen, you're going to make fun of me for this.
But for about four months, I was doing the pack of heaters rolled up on my sleep.
I mean, yeah, you, that doesn't shock.
Pulp fixing had just come out and I was in high school.
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
Soft pack.
I, you know, I relatively get it.
I, it makes sense.
It's a cool look.
Short sleep.
Hot cool dudes pull it off.
No, not me.
I'm the dudes that do pull it off are hot.
Oh, yeah.
You were not a hot cool dude.
Yeah. You were a good looking. I'm sure at that time. Who's the hot. Oh, yeah, you are not a hot cool dude. Yeah, good looking.
I'm sure at that time.
Who's the kid you elbowed?
The good looking kid?
Uh-huh.
I don't know.
Austin Butler.
He could pull that off.
Sure.
I think it also takes a specific t-shirt to look cool and do.
Would you do not have?
No.
I tried that one time.
I was in my room.
I rolled it up.
I looked.
I went, who do I think I am?
Yeah, to get out.
Just your fight.
I'm gonna fight if you do that.
Yeah, or have a hot rod.
Yeah, I have a switch blade.
And like a chick with big bumblebee hair.
Uh huh, the big body.
The big sheriff chasing you around,
because he knew you were no good.
You're from the wrong side of the tracks,
but you're doing all right.
He turned it around.
Yeah, that was, I mean, beanies in, I mean, that,
they got like cool. When we escaped like seventh, for me, that was, I mean, beanies in, I mean, that, they got like cool.
When we escaped like seventh, for me, it was like six,
seventh, eighth grade into high school,
like having a cool skate beanie or something,
and then those visors dropped, that was a fucking.
They were not cool when I was a kid.
They were not.
They were, dude, and well, I remember, it's like a younger kid.
It was, they were like nerdy.
We called them stockin' hats.
Yeah.
Put your stockin' hat on.
It's freezing outside.
It was the last thing you wanted.
They were brutal.
Fuck your hair up.
Because they changed.
And I did the...
Well, they went from the old school, like flip up,
which were dorky to the beanie.
The actual beanie without the flip up.
The Fisherman's.
Is what I guess.
Where it started.
No, the Fisherman was...
Or like what Mickey wore in Rocky.
It didn't go below the years. That's when they stats that was that that's the better of beanie
Without question they got to be shorter
And it's like smaller and tighter we wore monsters. Oh, man. They were so they would look like I was wearing like a gourd on my head
They were a specific kind of fabric, though
They weren't the cool kind of fabric and a ball or something on the top and itchy
kind of fabric, they weren't the cool kind of fabric and a ball or something on the top. And itchy.
If you got a little bit of snow in there and it melted, rubbing it with a little bit of
your oven mitts on.
Man, jam you up.
That's a tough look.
Yes.
Very.
Um, were you guys plastic bags over the shoes winter guys?
Yeah.
Rubber bands?
Yeah, never worked.
I feel like they would always get wet, but yeah, that was huge for a very long time just the most embarrassing feeling. Yeah, but we weren't that
Well, yeah, he's fishing you didn't do that when you're playing in the snow. No, you fucking snow boots
Put your snow boots on and bibs. We had bibs. What are bibs overalls? Yeah, like no
No, we'd overalls on to like snow pants with the clip snow pants. They were cool. Yeah, I know they weren't cool
No, no, I think they became could those became cool again
But the coolest thing I've though I got them and they want to see like eighth grade on sale at
Like some snowboard skate shop was called the g-spot actually my mom hated taking me to that place and I didn't know why
Still don't
places a myth.
It's a great story.
You could never find it.
No, yeah, fucking keep going a little further.
A little further.
What about this?
I never knew.
I mean, you started going to like sixth grade, maybe.
It was a big and not big was a
standalone house that they these fucking reefer heads turned into a
Skate shop, but shout out to it was called the G spot
It was on root one and Fairless Hills right by the Oxford Valley mall purple store to just said the G spot
I had no clue. I remember my mom being like I don't like taking it into this place
And I'm like I want ever you know. But I got a pair of snow pants that looked like,
not look, but like, we're gene cut, you know what I mean?
And they were thin.
They were thin.
Then like, they do, they were like, light gray.
Fuck, you put a bell on them and stuff.
And I was like, man, this is the epitome.
If those were cool, do you remember Gators?
Like the, waiters.
No, Gators. I think that Waiters. No, Gators.
I think that's how they were called Gators.
It was when you skied in jeans,
they were like,
they were like windbreaker material.
They'd go from your ankle to your knees
to keep you dry.
Pretty sure it was Gators.
I think I know what you're talking about.
They were like just for the ankle,
like up to like the,
the, yeah,
remember dude,
to rock them, older kids would rock them like, fuck, that's cool.
I mean, it couldn't pull it off.
Nothing's cooler than Mittens that convert into the fingerless gloves.
Oh, I remember on those drop two.
Mittens, dude, get out of here.
That convert into the fingerless gloves.
No, he got the flopped a turkey neck hanging down.
You can smoke six and pick pockets.
That they got cool, that was snowboarders again.
Snowboarders did that because it was mitten
so you could buckle.
But mitten's got cool for snowboarders around some time.
Because it was like anti-skip.
It was like, you know, ironic that they were cool.
And then once they had those that flipped out,
catch heaters, you could do your fucking,
do your bindings and stuff.
It was all right.
Hey, that meant, I was a freaky freezers man.
What?
You remember freaky freezers? Don I was a freaky freezers man. You remember freaky for another planet.
Do you remember freaky freezers?
There were gloves that had like a little like design on them and it only came out
when it was like an ice cream that ended in a class X lawsuit.
Oh shit.
Freaky freezers.
I had these.
I had this exact one, the robot.
Yeah.
Whoa.
I don't think you're the only you only could see the thing when it got cold man. They tasted a certain way
Hold on I know what you're talking about and they got a little wet the foam underneath
Yeah, cuz you have to like bite to like pull them I would bite the pole the Hoff man
Plus you get a little little little rock salt on there delicious
Salted taste Woo. Shut up. Close to get a little little rock salt on there. Delicious.
Salt the days though.
Eating your gloves.
Damn, that's a fucking blast from the past.
They were huge.
We had a trash bag.
They didn't get a pair of second hand
from my cousin, my mom would never buy them.
They were probably my brothers,
or even somebody got,
we had a black trash bag that smelled.
I could smell it to this day.
Filled with the winter stuff in the front closet. So it to this day, filled with the winter stalls
in the front closet. So it was the hats, the neck warmer, a scarf, a whatever. And it
would be in there, man. And that first you'd be digging, looking for the other one of
those free freezers and you can never find, there's a hole in the one. Yeah. That was
a good time. I didn't know they were branded like that. The robot freaky freezer. That's
what I had huge back in the day in the 80s
They were fucking huge. They didn't have them you're gonna get a pair of them dude
Damn all right this one's from my boy Pat friend of the show. There you go. He texted me this which I never thought
Do you say mirror or mirror as in check the rear view mirror check the review mirror
Mirror mirror. Yeah mirror rear view mirror review Check the review mirror. Mirror. Mirror.
Yeah, mirror.
Rear view mirror.
But look at the mirror.
It's just weird.
Is there a mirror?
I think I just say mirror.
And here you are.
For the mirror.
The thing you look at to look at yourself in,
is a mirror.
The thing to check behind is a review mirror.
Mirror.
Yeah.
No second are in there.
Mirror.
No. Just mirror. Rear view mirror. in there mirror. No, just me.
A rear view mirror. Review mirror. It's weird. Sounds real hillbilly.
Mirror mirror.
Review mirror. Reveal mirror. Mirror. I don't know.
I think mine's like M-E-E-R-E-R. Yeah, mirror. Yeah. Like a mirror cat.
E.R. Yeah, mirror. Yeah, like a mere cat.
Miracad manner shout out to that show.
I had the same thing. This is from eight Evan Aprins, $10 homie.
How do you pronounce wheelbarrow?
Wheelbarrow or barrel? It's barrel for me. I think we've touched on this. Sure we have have. It's a barrel. It's a barrel on wheels.
Yes. Well, what's a barrel? There's nothing. Like barrel outside of wheel, wheel barrel.
A barrel is a thing. A barrel is probably like an old world container or something. Yeah,
container. I know I fetch me my barrel. I had no idea it was a wheelbarrow.
What do you got on that T-bone? A two-wheeled handcart used especially by street vendors. British.
That's the barrel.
Uh-oh.
And that.
Also known as a luggage trolley.
A luggage trolley.
We beat this Korean.
And those brits are goofy bananas.
They really are.
So I got good with Dennis get a real dictionary.
Someone commented on this TV episode like 30 seconds in when he said he was born in London. We both went, hello, and like I mean, I'm like, it's such a knee
jerk reaction to scream. The second you hear it.
A wheelbarrow wheel. Yeah, that's, um, I say wheelbarrow.
Wheelbarrow. Yeah. Yeah, wheelbarrow. I've also, I've, it's, um, I say wheelbarrow. Wheelbarrow, yeah, wheelbarrow.
I've also, I've, it's because of the show and obviously now like talking for
a living and so much that I've come, I've just accepted and you have to
of just like the words I say are wrong.
I'm fine with.
Does that make sense?
I'm very okay.
I'm like, yeah, that's just wheelbarrow.
Everybody knows what I'm saying.
Like, like, library, it's library. It's, I'm never going. I'm like, yeah, that's just wheelbarrow. Everybody knows what I'm saying. Like, like, library.
It's library.
I'm never gonna say library.
Is that even, or?
They should take your MXLite.
Yeah, I don't say that.
They can, because it's,
I say it again?
Library.
Yeah.
Library.
I'm like a new flavor, a white cloth.
Library.
People who pronounce library,
library have never been in one.
Yeah, I didn't, I say that library. Yeah, noouts library. Library have never been in one. Yeah.
And I say that library.
Yeah, no, I'm not.
I, that's going to shame me.
I just said I'm finally owning this and I'm owning it.
Man, I didn't know that.
Uh-huh.
I say others like, uh.
Jesus, you're running this operation.
That's a little unnerving.
I should have had a bug light shed. I just realized maybe that's that guy's way of unnerving. I should have done it in Bud Lightshad.
I just realized maybe that's that guy's way of flagging me.
Maybe he thought I was too drunk.
I was like, uh, yeah, bring it to him.
Maybe they had a board meeting.
Yeah, that you old sauce.
Whatever it is.
Yeah, damn, but I'm owning it.
I say a bunch of stuff weird and I'm fine with it.
They just love a bottle of beer with water.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hop up.
I'm sorry, fat.
All right, this one's from Matthew.
Is it garbage to drink a fountain soda
when the ice is already melted?
Eeeh.
Change, it's not great.
Fresh ice.
Yeah, but I mean,
fresh ice.
It is, it kind of gets,
like it kind of scratches the itch,
but it just doesn't. It's just cut with that much more water
Now if it's like been sitting in the cup holder in the car, mm-hmm. Oh, and you take usually kind of warm that first wave of ice
Really takes a punishment to they're the first guys on the beach. Oh, by the time the second wave when you go
You got you got to do fresh ice. Oh, yeah, of course got to yeah
Yeah, that's crazy. It also depends on the ice.
Sometimes you get that soft ice that kind of goes quick.
If you get some hard, nice, good ice, it ruins it.
It ruins it.
I know.
I just picture a McDonald's cup and like it kind of separates
the water and the cold.
Ah.
It has that light film.
Uh huh.
It's like pond water.
I know. But I'll fucking, I'll still drink it. I don't give I don't give two shit
I'm always fresh ice
I'm I've lately. We've been ordering a second cup of ice
Whoa, yeah, and we'll give me a give me the example. Hey, you're at a bar or dinner
Anywhere hey, sir. What can I get you?
Can I do a my tie with a cup of ice on the side?
Whoa.
Yeah.
And then what are you doing?
Just using my ties as a thing.
Sure, and then you're just pouring that in there?
Yeah.
And then pouring, pouring, taking the cup and pouring it
into the container with ice and then drinking out of that
and then filling it up as, as need be.
That's pretty, that's pretty hoitty, be. I like a lot of ice. That's pretty hoidy toyty.
Like a lot of ice.
Huh.
Just doing I'm doing my business when I'm crossing the river.
Sure.
I gotta get fucked up.
I've said before about one of my brothers all time dirt bag moves was to order a double
crown on the rocks.
No double crown.
Yeah, double crown on the rocks.
Take a couple of sweat like sip it for, you know,
five minutes or whatever, so you're like getting a couple shots
of, you know, couple and then go, hey, can you,
he'd go to the bartender, can you splash a little coke in this?
So then, so for the price of one, you get a,
you get a couple straight, rips off the crown,
then you get a crown and coke.
I remember being like, he's like, yeah,
they don't charge, he's like, you get a, you get a couple of fucking wax off it and then you're walking around with
a free mixed drink. Yeah. We figured out like that. That's all right. No bartenders gonna
give you shit. Yeah, you get a little splash of diet in there. There you go. Especially
if you're fucking whacking them all. Once you get that fucking and you just paid for it,
you just paid for a double crown. So you're cool.
Yeah.
Because a crown on a rocks is more expensive than a crown of coke, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, significantly.
But I'm saying like you, he probably take like four swigs.
And also, I think it was a way to not to get to, you know,
and then he would do like another one of those.
Maybe that's what I'll start.
I remember a guy called on and was like,
what do you, you can't, you're just like double dip and drinks here.
We figured out a bar in Chicago.
Charge the same thing for a shot of Jameson as a Jameson neat,
which is a healthier poor.
Talk about Black Friday.
That was a deal for the ages.
Well, famously, we, I mean, when we were real,
when we were doing shows at Niagara bar, all time great New York City bar.
Seven today, seventh and a lot of shows in that back room.
It's kind of like where punk rock started in New York too.
It was a famous venue called seven A or seven and a or something.
Have like a historical New York City plaque in there of like all these like the fucking Ramones and should have played there.
But they would give you they had a they had a buy one get one system.
Remember that?
Yeah.
From five to seven,
if I think we,
we I think we stopped it.
Yeah.
Cause it was from five to seven.
So if you would buy a beer,
they would give you a free token for a beer, right?
So we would buy a bunch of beers during,
and they were cheaper.
They were cheaper.
They were like $3 instead of $5. So we'd buy a bunch and get the tokens and then wait for them to wait till
after happy hours. That was when I love affair with goose island started out. The blackouts in that
place. Man, good night. Goose Island IPAs screaming. Doing points though. Yeah. No chalices over
there. And then they finally caught on there.
Like you can't.
We'd so we'd saved it.
We'd have like a stack of chips.
Till they were five dollar beers.
And then rolling, we're walking up to the bar all in.
Yeah.
Roll.
Rollin' after eight bang bang bang.
We take them home, come back with them the next night.
Yeah.
They were like, how long will it be?
Like how many of these do you guys have?
We're like, I'm gonna zip it.
Well, because we'd get some for run in the show too. I might have gotten to the bag at one point too. They were like how many of these do you guys have? I'm like, I'm gonna zip it, will you?
Because we'd get some for run in the show too.
I might have gotten to the bag at one point too.
There was a bag of them.
Oh, a little too close to them.
Yeah, the bear was killed and then streets did.
Those were tough times.
But it is what it is.
Great part though.
Great part of going to get hammered.
Also, you know the walls of that?
On a cold night.
Yeah, they're famous artists. They're famous. I think it's a famous Japanese artist. He was just in there get hammered. Also you know the walls of that? On a cold night. Yeah, the famous artist.
The famous, I think it's a famous Japanese artist.
He was just in there one night drunk and like it was empty.
And he just, they let him draw over the walls.
And now they are like, these walls are worth like
$5 million or something like that.
They're behind Plexiglas now.
It's just like this famous Japanese artist doodles.
It's pretty crazy.
You can't get me on a goose island.
I got the chip.
Jamie me up.
I'm back there bombing. Yeah, I'm man. I don't think I ever did well a goose island. I got the chip. Jamie me up. I'm back there bombing.
Oh man, I don't think I ever did well in that place.
That place, we a bomb box.
I ate shit back there.
Oh man, every time.
How is it?
You were there one night, right?
Oh yeah.
Hanging out?
Yeah.
Good times.
Damn.
Really thought we were doing it.
Getting drunk in New York City in the winter.
They're ain't nothing better.
Stumbling out, don't need to, you should have a jacket,
but you're so drunk when you're catching a heater,
you're all right.
Fresh and jubble, but it's like a cup of coffee.
I get a step outside, get my bearings.
I got a drive out of here.
Check my tokens.
Make sure I'm flush with it, I just couple around.
Otherwise I got a dip out.
All right, this one's from Jacob.
Hey, Boso's $10 homie here.
Never have one red.
What kind of license plate frame are you rocking?
I, do you have one?
No, but I had the option to have one, but I didn't use it.
Gets the place where we got dealership.
Yeah, yeah, no, I'm not doing that.
I'm rocking a car, one of one that I have to take.
Holy shit. Yeah, it's just where I got, I mean, that on your new car. Yeah, yeah, no, I'm not doing that. I'm rocking a car. Vano one that I have to take holy shit
It's just where I got I mean that on your new car. Yeah, you lose I know I just have yeah
Holy shit alert dude such a nerd every time I see it. I'm like man. You're a dork. I even debated
They they put like they're trashy they put the sticker on the back of the car now, like from the decal.
From where you got it from.
Berge's auto group.
Yeah, I was gonna try to wipe that off.
I don't know how they feel about that.
Uh huh.
But then I realized if, when I'm done this lease,
I can take,
Oh boy, here we go.
I can take that to like, it's, I have a Jeep.
I could go to a four dealership and trade it in over there
So they would change the decal anyway sure right sure
I don't know I just got an offer to get to they want me in a new key of forte
2023 whoa, yeah, I see the reason I got jammed up in the first place the bullshit car you got
Yeah, this one they can still easier
So don't break your windows
We actually give them the keys
Yeah, that's a tough look man. Oh, did you hear what I heard unless it's like, you know
US Navy or something like that or like the college is something real classy like chain link that's
I'm gonna low rider you got to have chain link. That's all right.
Like I can fight, yeah.
Chain link.
Something subtle, unless it goes with the car.
Like if you have like some sort of low rider or something,
you know, you can do something of that ilk.
But-
That's the only time you can do that.
Yeah.
The chain link barrier is absolute trash.
I might get a chain link barrier now that we talk about it.
Class it up a little bit, let him know from the streets.
Yeah, I may look pretty.
It used to be for Corvana.
Yeah, that's a tough look, dude.
Yeah, they're not classy ever.
If you throw in Yosemite Sam or any type of, uh,
loony tunes character.
Anything loony tunes, now and anything, is, is a tough look.
For a minute, it wasn't though.
I like a road runner mud flap on a, on a 18 wheeler.
Mud flaps are fun.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Mud flaps are all right.
Yeah, all right.
You know, yeah, Yosemite with a double barrel or whatever. That's all right.
Um, like mud flaps have gone on a style. They still have those on big rigs. Yeah, they do.
Mm-hmm. Okay. Huh. Get a pair for you.
Ha, ha, ha.
Do you ever get jammed up on your bike? What do you mean when you were a kid with mud flaps?
The, well, they, they have them them I see the delivery guys they have like
Oh so the rain doesn't fly up. Yeah I didn't know that when I was a little fat kid
and fucking eighth grade zipping around on my bike show up. Show up to my buddy
sounds like he should my bed. Yeah. You know what I mean? You got the line up
from the ass crack all the way up to your neck. Oh look. Going to a little hang
out by the playground with some chicks.
Holy shit, it's pins!
Just hanging out on the outside of the circle.
Okay, what's on it?
Not what they did, but he kept behind him.
Stayed in the face in on the merry-go-round the whole time.
On the merry-go-round.
The merry-go-round.
Yeah.
You know what merry-go-round is?
She'll hurt.
The thing that spins around.
I know what eighth grader was going to do that.
We used to hang out there. At the merry-go the park at the like the public park. I'm thinking like you're
thinking of what an actual man around it with up and down horses fully fully softly. That's merry go
around. You're talking about the twisty turn. The metal thing. Yeah. Yeah. I saw a video where they hooked and shane up to that and attached it to a truck. Yeah. They got hurt.
Those heads come off.
They don't see that.
They don't think.
That thing was dangerous.
Went out the fucking hook and it up to a thing.
It had the, I don't know what the, the term for it is, but like the metal that had like
the little, like rivets on it.
Yeah, she metal.
Yeah.
I would get 9,000 degrees burning in the back.
I remember I went to a Holland Elementary
and there was this stainless steel slide.
Man, I'm talking, it should have been caution tape around it.
We'd go out there and fucking, you know, early late August
or early due fucking sizzling.
It was so long, dude, the behavior way down,
trying to jump off the middle
The hell man.
His shirt goes up.
They could skin on that.
It was also, I mean like it is, you know, it was all just mental.
Just, I remember I was in like fourth grade when they put finally but plastic in and that's like dude.
We've already, you know, you're coming with like blisters and stuff on your hands.
Yeah, they did that at Shady Grove Elementary
The year that I was I think in fifth grade
Oh bad jungle gym swing set like that good Kelly
Like it was metal from Pearl Harbor
That they reused brutal so I bullet holes in it and shit like that
Mm-hmm, and they came in. I don't know where they got this money
But this thing was state of the art. It was metal and it had the plastic
Covering around it. Oh, yeah
Had the little little crow's nest where you can go up there with the
Steering wheel or whatever a lot of madda thick-tacto thing you could like flip around and play yeah
They put the the railroad wouldn't things around it to tie it off and then mulch in the middle. We couldn't tell us nothing.
Those had big in the 90s for us. They were always like yellow and blue.
That's when I was like, oh, that's just somebody. I just got to move the taxes just went up in the tail
to pay for that. Real nice. Um damn. Yeah. I remember getting so fucking hurt on those things though.
Jamby up. though fucking bees nest everywhere
Good night catch a was Nest or you pull out a little like a little cap on the end peek in there
I can four wasp it now looking at you with guns
Yikes go back into class you got fucking wood chips in your shoes and shit fucking suck
Smellin like a fucking smell like a rat's nest
like a fucking smell like a rat's nest. That fresh mulch was tough.
Yeah.
Get that on you.
Kick and smell like a dead cat.
Uh, all right, this one's from Josh.
Is it garbage if your local convenience stores sell single batteries, both AA and AAA?
They got to be open in the pack on that.
You get AA loses?
That's what do you need one battery for?
One battery?
Expensive, man.
But what's running off one battery?
Need one.
One more.
That's what I'm asking.
You get one from the remote or one from somewhere else?
You just need one.
That's a very New York bodega thing.
Sure.
Of like, you can buy the Lucy, you can buy a single stamp.
They don't, they're doing whatever they will.
They're opening up packages, they're, you know You know here take one potato trip. They don't care
Handful of skittles
Yeah, piece of gum
Yeah, they really don't care
I remember that first time I learned I could buy one stamp. I thought I thought I thought I was like a drug deal
My roommate was like yeah, just go into that corner. So they'll say you stamp I was like one in my head. I'm committing a federal
How many stamps do you use in your life?
Two to three
Enough maybe ten in my whole life maybe ten probably maybe 20
What were you mailing my self letters and stuff like that risque
Life lived in Germany for a while. So I would send stuff like that. risque photos. My wife lived in Germany for a while,
so I would send stuff like that.
Would you, would you write like letters?
We have, yeah.
Really?
You put a little spritz of colon on there.
Put some honey muskets off.
Put some lipstick on the end.
Give it a smile.
Oh my god, this is the package.
The spelling errors, those letters were littered with, dude.
You would love letters.
That's what I mean, you really paid me
to record her on this one.
Welcome to the show.
But you would send actual letters.
I have.
I wouldn't, you know.
Not with a package.
Not, okay, I'm talking just a letter.
Maybe once.
Maybe once.
Man, if we get our hands on that.
I think I just found it not too long ago,
or a picture of it or something, or she found it or something.
What color was the envelope?
Did you go pink?
I used to steal the stationery from my day job.
I used to hit it at the house.
From the law.
She thought she was getting sued.
I never opened them plausible deniability.
Yeah, said absurd.
Nobody signed for that.
I was scared.
Oh man, that's a tough look.
You're opening it up your love letter with doom
and make it served.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
I never understood that.
Remember when they tried to teach you
how to write like a business letter
where it was like the address of who it was sent to?
And then it was like almost like a CCC type thing,
carol or whatever.
There was like a name and an address
and a name and an address under the name.
It was also getting a copy.
Oh man, they tried to teach me that nice.
We're in jail.
What are you talking about?
I don't know, I'm never taken like, you know,
in some class, had a write like a formal letter in high school.
And I didn't get it at all.
You don't say.
No, I didn't understand how to do that.
Dear parole board.
I knew, I knew to start a paragraph
that you pushed in a little bit.
Okay, that's not that, that, that, okay.
They don't do that no more, do they? No, yeah, no, you do. I think, yeah, yeah, for sure. If you're in a little bit. Okay, that's not that, that, that, that, that, they don't do that no more, do they?
No, you, yeah, no, you do.
I think, yeah, yeah, for sure, if you're typing a paper,
yeah, well, it's all now word processing does it all.
Because I've always been very impressed
with you about how to do a business email.
Sure, I've worked in the business, you know,
I've worked at mall firms and stuff, I think.
Right, I didn't think anybody put anything
in the subject line. Yeah, I worked at mall firms and stuff. I didn't think anybody put anything in the subject line.
Yeah, he said it to me very recently.
He goes, people don't use that, do they?
I'm like, everybody?
I thought that was like a faux pas.
That was like saying, you know.
Not that I know of, no.
Like yelling.
What?
Yeah, I thought that was yelling.
It's how paranoid you are.
I mean, like that.
Cyber Monday. Here's something that you freaking. I'm sorry.
Yeah, I didn't get that shit at all.
Yeah, um, I learned it. I guess I learned some of it in business school, but like, you know,
I think the, yeah, I don't know. I mean, it never really like drafted letters. I learned all that
stuff just from like papers and stuff. And then email, like never really like drafted letters. I learned all that stuff just from like papers and stuff and then email like nobody was like sending
Everything was just done via fucking email
You were more email more email etiquette than anything. Yeah, they were still teaching us how to write like a formal business letter
I still don't like I mean like I'll do it like you know
The suits will send us stuff and like people be CC'd and everything and I a lot of times
I just cut all those people out and just I'm like I didn't reply back
I won't reply all oh really yeah I don't need all these people in my business power move I like that this is between me and you yeah
I can get the audience out of here see if you're still a tough guy
See if you're still running your mouth behind closed
Now I do I show everybody see if you still hit me with the all caps. Uh-huh
Well, it's just also too confusing. I don't you know with like you know, you know a show or something
I don't know everybody's name at the venue or the something and then you know
I'm like just give me though. I need all the knows the person I'm talking to that was the same thing with business and in business
You really have to keep it all if that's all like plausible deniability of like,
if you circumvent the email chain and cut people out.
Can you know you're up to something?
They're up to, yeah, so they want to have like,
everybody's stuff is documented.
You might as well be going, pssss.
Pssssss.
Yo, she's a bitch, ain't she?
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
Reply, oh fuck.
Well that, there, I mean, there's also,
there's always, there's a big etiquette of that of like,
you know, per my previous email, means like, like bitch if you ain't see it up there like I already done told you
I don't know how to do any of that stuff. Yeah, per my previous email means like you're fucking up later
Can you do anything you know anything about that stuff buddy? I signed documents with an ex. What are you talking about?
I think I it's as much as we've I've sent Toby three emails. I don't get any emails. That's the way we like it big
I mean, well, what would you email me? I don't know. Yeah. Hey, you know, and hey, buddy
This is another format. Give me an occasion. You can bother me with
Wouldn't my get my hands on that love letter though. Uh, yeah, that's not gonna happen
That's crazy. I make sense. I know love letter uh, it was a more of a bit at the time.
Um, I was more of a poem guy.
That's you.
This is so much worse.
Yeah.
This is, if you think this isn't a way for him to just cram in his poetry,
down into the show, you're dead wrong.
I, nobody asked what you were.
And he pulls out a scroll.
Actually, I was more of a poem.
Book of short stories. Tell me, lower the light, then.
Uh, sunny day and other stories.
Life and times of a fat ass.
Is the death of a fat ass.
Uh, yeah, no, it was more of like a, I was, I, I, I, I,
I, I just found it recently.
It was more of like a conversation we were having via text
at the time.
Was it romantic?
No, it was more like, yeah, I think I was,
she's like, I'm working, she's like,
why don't you set me a letter or something?
I was like, oh, here's your letter or something.
It was like, draw a weiner.
Neat, you.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Stick figures, bang it.
Yes, no, sir.
My boss said, what are you working on? That is the Penske file. I'm not a fan of the thing. I'm not a fan of the thing.
I'm not a fan of the thing.
I'm not a fan of the thing.
I'm not a fan of the thing.
I'm not a fan of the thing.
I'm not a fan of the thing.
I'm not a fan of the thing.
I'm not a fan of the thing.
I'm not a fan of the thing.
I'm not a fan of the thing.
I'm not a fan of the thing. I'm not a fan of the thing. You marry me. No, no pen pals. No letters to speak of really.
I think I'm one of my boys in college had like a serious pen pal all growing up.
We didn't know this.
He always freaked me out.
And then he's like, my buddy's coming to, you know, he's coming, you know, like in college.
Yeah.
Steve's coming for a weekend.
Yeah.
And that was either hit or miss.
He usually miss if you're either best friends of that guy or you ended up watching him
get beat up. Do they always gotten fights because they couldn't handle their shit. Every
single time they either blacked out caused a scene at the pizza place or got their ass kicked
in the basement of a book party. Yeah, every time it dude showed up, I think he was Australian
or something like that. And this guy caused a problem. And I every time is dude showed up. I think he was Australian or something like
that. And this guy caused a problem. And I'm like, I think like Saturday after the first
day, we're like, how do you know this guy? Like that he's like, I he was my pen pal growing
up. I'm like, what? You're fucking pen pal. You're vouching for this guy. Yeah. That's
right. And the letters in the summer. That's not, I think I would love to read.
I don't think he would let me.
My buddy, I think the street term is served a bid.
So I would write him letters.
Oh, that's cool.
And he would write them back, mad hood,
which is crazy to write out fucking hood language.
Like, D-A-T would be that. You know what I mean like how do you spell not I'm saying?
He knew it was always there's always great Facebook was always not still when people with typehood is shit
You have to try to do that. I've never seen bitch ass written in cursive
Fountain pen
I figured you got to do that in the can just the case anybody can
Yeah, when you're in the clink case anybody gets their hands
I really think you're someone else and case somebody gets the hands on it sure
Yeah, they say right love letters sending kites
Whispered sweet nothing.
Hahaha.
I mean, it's a telling your mom how hard it is.
That don't get you.
That's a great clip that I love, but you ever see the talking on the phone?
I would always, I would be putting in, did you kill that motherfucker?
Yeah.
Somewhere, PS, did you kill that motherfucker?
PS, I'm mad as shit, yo.
And then the sentence we, yo sentence we yo written out is crazy
Yo y'all be wow
Yeah, he was he was send us these mad hood letters
It was crazy it was not all written wild like exclamation points and shit like tagged up like big
You know like some things would take up like talking
Palsy's an obligated to write them back
You can't just leave him
Yeah, cuz then he's getting out. I know you didn't write me. I know
But still a good friend served this time paid his death to society now. He's fucking killing it
There you go. He's doing better than some other guys from the team. It's crazy
Dude he got out of jail.
Got a job in like a work release program,
and then my buddy, he got my other buddy at job
who wasn't in jail.
We're like, dude, he had a four-year head start.
He had a four-year head start on this guy.
He's getting you with you.
I'm even doing his ult died.
But we gotta wrap wrap it up gang.
That's the time for today.
Gang.
Love you to death.
Uh-huh.
Probably a couple tickets left for that filly show.
Yeah, filly show.
I don't have my numbers in front of me, but very limited tickets if any.
Get them, Jones.
And we'll see you there.
And we love you and we'll see you next week.
Peace.
And we'll see you there and we love you and we'll see you next week.
Peace.