Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Indoor Hot Tub w/ Kippy & Foley
Episode Date: June 29, 2023Are You Garbage is back with Kippy and Foley for a family episode to answer your garbage questions from Patreon. Its a fun one! Thanks for watching AYG Comedy Podcast. Love youse guys. Come to a live ...show! NEW TOUR DATES: https://areyougarbage.com/ Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/hfoleycomedy/ Live Shows: https://areyougarbage.com/ PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Indochino: https://www.Indochino.com Promo Code: GARBAGE Express VPN: https://www.expressvpn.com/Garbage Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans?
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Huge tour announcement calling on all the army of garbage. We just added a bunch of dates to the state
Dredge door for the fall and for the winter stand up comedy show plus we play a little a wide-jee with the crowd
Great way to introduce to people to the show come out and see the boys. Yeah gang. All tickets are available at our website
Are you garbage dot com? We're coming to Phoenix Denver Salt Lake City
Los Angeles, San Diego, Washington DC, Pittsburgh, Buffalo, Toronto, Pontiac, Michigan, Chicago,
Minneapolis, Madison, Milwaukee, Sacramento, San Francisco, San Jose, and then we're ending it in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, maybe get those tickets. Let's party.
Yeah, welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Gabbitch?
The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash.
Now here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H Foley.
Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's new favorite podcast. This is R U Gurbich.
Heyy! So I will show you sit there with your favorite comedians and we find that after you're to be classy.
Or just a big old piece of trash trash. I'm your host
Nate trolley coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out
back here with Tuddy's in the new edition. She was just
stocking up the garage strids with freeze pops. Okay. Tell
me I'll click I work at best by. Hey shout out to the
geek squad. A couple of zingers coming my way.
She can be a cruel lady when she wants to be.
Sure.
My co-host is coming at you from across the table.
This is a family episode, just to Boseos,
the homies, and the boys.
That's what we do.
Just the way we like it sometimes.
Give it up for KJ, Kevin James Ryan, everybody.
What up gang, thanks for tuning in.
As always, please make sure you rate,
view, subscribe, and I tune in.
It's full video available
New to imagine those numbers are
Root-root cooking and obviously the greatest website of all time
WWE that patreon dot com slash are you garbage gang you sign up over there. We're almost at 10,000 patrons
Baby keeping me in ozempic. Oh, it's goddamn fucking homeyville over there baby 10 dollar homies all around
Check it out getting you the shit
Ton of bonus content the indie videos up there. Oh my goodness an happen a nice quick shout out to our producer
Extraordinary speaking of the indie video to brains behind the operation. He's the magic man
Makes us all look good looks real good and one of them racing suits to I'll tell you that give it up for T-bone McScruffins
Toby McBollon everybody what up boys? Hey pal. I'm going straight one piece from here on
I told you that it's the only article of clothing that looks good on me. I think I
wouldn't make funny as much. I'd treat you in a little more respect if you were walking around
cool guy in with that thing. I get it. That's like I'm light on fire and you'll be okay.
Just fall through the table. Oh dude you have a lot of fun fireworks, those things.
Yeah.
Dude, and also shout out to the new guy Luke
with the angles all over that indie video.
Sure, crushing it.
Sure, sure, good kid, like Luke, good kid,
but not cool like you, I'll tell you that right now,
and that jumper, you could just wear those, you know that, right?
No, he can, no one can just, first of all,
through about fucking 300 degrees in him, things, no one can just wear those, you know that, right? No, he can, no one can just, first of all, through about fucking 300 degrees in him,
things, no one can just wear them, all right?
No, but just the regular ones,
like the ones like if you were working at a garage.
Like a Michael Myers?
Yeah, sure.
That, I don't even Michael Myers.
Yeah, no, I didn't, great.
He's kinda out.
He's talking about creeping out the girls at the party.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Hey, will your serial killer friends stop staring at me?
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Why does he keep wanna go hang out at the lake? What's this guy's to you? Ha, ha, ha, you're, well, you're serial killer friends. I'm staring at me.
Why does he keep on to go hang out at the lake? What's the sky?
The you he won't shut up about the train tracks.
I don't know.
Let's go.
Hey, we get it.
She was your babysitter.
All right, get over it.
You don't like it.
No more.
Hey, Blair, which zip it?
Well, you.
John trying to get laid over.
Why don't you go do a lap or something?
Sky talking about his mommy issues
I'll Halloween
She's dead man get over it.
Have a Clark bar dude. It's all good.
I got a I got something I want to get into.
I was just down there with the family this weekend.
Oh yeah, down there with the boys hanging out.
Brother did a nice barbecue.
He did huh?
Nice. Got that sweet spot down barbecue. He did huh? Nice.
Got that sweet spot down there.
He's got his Tony soprano backyard.
It's fantastic.
Got the pool, the hard scape that instant at.
Is it a coincidence that both of our brothers
are better than us?
Ha ha ha.
Yeah, that's why we met up.
Okay.
To plot their demands.
To take them down from these.
That's why I got a little piece.
He thought it was just what a hamburger.
What are we doing?
Couple of dogs for the boys.
If I could move in with Dennis,
if they had a little brother.
Of course.
Sure.
What?
What kind of fantasy camp are you in?
I would love that.
No, not even with undoges, the successful guy.
No, my brother.
If I could move in with them in the fam,
I'd be okay with that.
How about we room up there? That wouldn't end well. No, my brother, if I could move in with them and the fam, I'd be okay with that. How old room up there?
That wouldn't end well.
No, of course not.
We already tried that.
In the early 2000s.
Yeah, I tried it and you didn't pay rent.
No, it was nice.
It's good.
The burbs are nice.
Big fan of the burbs.
That's like it all.
The olders slow down,
couple of heaters out back, whatever.
Had all the kids over a bunch of my,
this is what I wanted to talk about.
I've realized, obviously, I have to do in the show
and then spend so much time with my family.
Like, this has made me reevaluate how I look at
my upbringing and my family.
How trash are you exactly worth?
And are.
Yes.
And that's my family.
Yes, exactly.
Just, you know, even if they're, you know.
It doesn't go away.
No.
It was just the 80s and the 90s.
It was like this fog that you couldn't really see through.
Cause you didn't really know what other people were doing.
And there was no internet back there.
Yeah.
Shout out to Al Gore.
Yeah.
So we're there.
We're all hanging out right.
Pops or everything's hanging.
It's good.
And good coolers what do you
got yeties doing yeties down there nice got the fridge got the with the fridge
outside outside fridge wait what do you mean I don't know how I still explain
really you don't you don't gotta go on you didn't need any backup information on
that now okay you don't have to walk down to things and go into the garage and get one. It's right there.
Out of fridge outside.
Really?
Dough pit of brim.
Real?
Had a brim.
He opened it.
There's course lights falling out.
I got the treasure chest for alcohol.
And garrr.
Get off me high noons.
Uh, yeah.
So we're there hanging out.
You know, it's a, it's a whole thing.
And so what one of my cousin shows up, he was just at a soccer game.
He's drunk.
He was coaching.
He's at a, he's at a game, right?
This is like, now everybody starts coming together.
Can I say this?
I don't mean to interject.
Sure.
That's the show.
Um, say something.
Uh, all I can speak from is the, the greater Phil Delphius suburban area.
Because that's all I really know
But that was nine different exits
Yarmie suburbs
Hey, damn him, Fanny mate
Man, I've been speaking to which I was in a review with Rod Stewart. He's got something going on
That guy is a treasure trove of fucking just awesomeness. Yeah.
I could sit and listen to him talk for days.
Hey, we bought that.
That was nice.
He's a dirty football player too, by the way.
Shout out to my cousin, Kevin.
He came in and cleats up on him.
Thought it was a fucking friendly.
Anyway.
Yeah.
The soccer will across field hockey, youth leagues
that they got down there. Have really it's on steroids load. It's private this
Club that I mean over by my mom they have these serious soccer on a fucking baseball field Yeah, and now it's like they got bleachers. There's an owner's box. It's like what the fuck are we doing?
Yeah, I'm not like the fucking Raiders and fucking 75 I did I've ever been a little kid and seeing that mean like what the fuck are we doing? Yeah, I'm not that like the fucking Raiders and fucking 75
I did I've ever been a little kid and seeing that being like what the fuck is up?
I'm gonna catch a partner shadow. I'm like what is up with his team?
You can't get your own spot
Shit was he get a co-sider or something?
She was brutal talk about staying at your brother's place
You know bad it is for your knees to go from astroturf to fucking dirt in two steps.
I remember being a kid watching that being like, what in the fuck this ain't for this is
right?
I can't remember what the fuck the deal was.
This is like the longest yard dude.
The Raiders played, I guess it would have been at, uh, at the ease.
No.
No.
Oh yeah, I guess it was at the oak.
I guess I was fucking to when this was I was thinking candlestick
no is that same Francisco yeah that's what I was thinking oh cool same for this go I don't know I don't know um
but so they anyway they got a big operation down here yeah it's a thing and the you know uh so
they come in and one of the one of the little kids uh
So they come in and one of the one of the little kids
Got enough got a fist fight really got a fist fight with two or three other kids ran up on them
What during the game? I think it was after I was after the game I think it was oh shit. Yeah, and he fucking piece them up to sweet. He comes from good stock
This is he's a soccer place is soccer. I soccer kids going
after each other after the game. You have to have they usually flop. No, but this is this is what I'm
realizing. They're all floppers. No, it's they know the first the first group. It's Philly dirtbag
and then soccer player. So at the end of the day, you're still ready to throw some fist
that comes. Got you. This kid's six. young, little kid, little kid comes in and piece, apparently
piece these two tree kids up.
Really?
Two sweet.
Yeah.
Jumped them by the cars.
Apparently, and he's got good genes this kid comes from a big guy.
So fucking, you know, hit him with the fucking, you know, the, the, the old fucking one, two,
so we can't really anybody see any, uh, any, uh, any, his dad saw.
Yeah.
If fucking got some into any, any, any, any, any, any, any, any, any, any, uh,
what ramifications?
I can't really explain it on the lamb in another school dish.
That's what I'm saying.
There you go.
No, no, no, no.
And then the kids, the kids, because then you get real prissy about that shit.
No, it's the kids, the kids parents
can't, they like, they, they were
in the wrong for sure.
Okay.
The kids, you know, but I think
he's a bigger kid so they were
like, let's try to get him or
whatever and, hmm.
They didn't, you know,
so the, well, it's southward
of boys.
The other kids parents were like,
I, hey, sorry about that.
I think, I don't have a,
see that's nice.
Hey, sorry, my kids try to jump
yours, but that's nice. When, sorry, my kids try to jump yours.
But that's nice.
When the-
They say we go get a hot dog.
When the parents start acting like idiots, then it's a pants.
That's not completely disqualified from my family either.
Really?
Yeah.
Why are you not to get into-
You don't have to get into two-dried things,
but we're moving-
Talking about the kids.
But they came in and-
My cousin told the story is a guy, you know so and so gotten a fight and
It was like that scene from good fellows that he popped his cherry all the uncles were like, yeah, you fuck them up
I'm like
We are so fucking dirt back
Normally you'd be like, hey don't violence this in the answer don't't hit them They were like you fucking got on dude what happened?
Give me give me a sipy cup of course like and a medium rare burger
I was gonna have you steak rare now. I was sitting there. I'm like this kid. This is crazy
But then I started thinking like that's how we were raised
It was like you know probably kept your mouth shut
I'm fucking tuning you up
Straighten you out, but it's just like I was like, Holy shit.
You're softy over here. Oh, you popped your cherry.
They were like carrying around. He was the bell of the ball.
After they found out he fucking, you know, sure, he gave someone the two piece.
It's like Jesus Christ. Shout out to it, baby.
Couple of kids lay next to an old Corvette.
Christ shout out to it baby couple of kids lay next to an old Corvette
Here I just gun I
New I was in trouble at that point, but I couldn't look away
He's gonna check what him
Hey, this is Karen by the way
Yeah, it was just a really big look into this psyche of my family. And I was just like, damn, and it made me feel nice.
Because that's who we all at.
You're going to see you got put store bought potato salad.
No, we have it.
We have it.
We have an ex of violence.
We have an elementary school fight club going on.
If you want to get your nephews in.
How was the grub?
Grub was good.
Who's working at Grub? He did grill because it is summer. It is grilling season
Yeah, now he did he's got the the blackstone the big the big John big boy. Yeah, he's got a great fucking
You have a grittle to a flat top on that thing. I think it's a whole flat top really
Yeah, so everything was done on the flat top I think really yeah, that's what they're doing these days
It's like my dream. I know you're a smash burger kid
Oh, and the breakfast you can whip up on those things man. Yeah, I'm making almost the size of your head
I used to love watching them at college our cafeteria that a huge laptop and you could watch and you real lady killer
You want to go see you make big eggs I mean you've never seen
Hashem so crispy I tell you if we get to early you can watch a flip to burgers
no man between that and your engineering for that they uh don't like you
shout out the theta guy no they would do they had a big flat top and there was a
first time I saw them all like spread out and fold it up real nice
Pretty cool sure. Yeah, yeah, but I have to say this
Summertime grilling that flat top shit get come on. It's all about the open flame. I don't just I mean sure
I guess if you want to that's not grilling that's grittling
That's like you're working at some greasy spoon on my highway. I mean this fucking guy.
You need like a trigger or something like that.
Or a grill.
You need both.
Sure, you need both.
Hey, I think he's got a grill.
I just think for this.
He has to.
Yeah, of course.
I think the size of it, I mean there was 40 people there.
Okay.
So it's like that grittle, it's a big thing.
He's got orders coming in.
That's yeah, he's fucking jammed up.
Talk about it in the weeds.
The rush.
86 to cheese dogs
Really not no cheese dogs
You don't see them that much anymore
Now unless mom was you're at the nieces house. Did she still get them?
She knows she knows the weight of my heart the Oscar Meyer the original on some potato roll if I'm coming down
Yeah, yeah, you don't really see them on the grill.
No, that's a microwave.
That's a, you're eating those by yourself, I think.
However, they don't grill right.
There is a company, it turns chemically,
chemically.
There's an operation out of,
I wanna say Wisconsin.
Can you give me a Google on this?
Usingers.
Usingers.
I wanna say it's Wisconsin.
Okay, and what about it?
They do, they ship all over the country, I think.
And my old man.
According to my research.
My old man had them send them a little something one summer.
And one of the things they sent with these cheese hot dogs,
like real good cheese hot dogs.
Man.
You singers famous sausage, didn't?
Yeah.
Milwaukee Wisconsin.
Milwaukee Wisconsin.
You are a fucking pork byproducts of on.
That's crazy.
You just nailed that.
Have you ever been to Milwaukee?
No.
You just know this.
Yeah.
That fucking eyeing up that box.
Like you're reading the back of a fucking cereal box
when you're eating, doing a maze.
Have a poor snout.
Oh, delicious.
So yeah, we should bring that back.
What?
The cheese dog should be more prevalent
in the adult grilling genre.
How about that?
Does that make sense?
This summer we could do it.
We could turn it around.
Yeah, you act like we could try to start a slow clap.
You know what?
I'm going home this weekend.
Cheese dogs on the grill.
That's it.
I don't even have to have one.
But you're going to I might take a take a game.
Take a walk around.
Yeah.
Okay, can I say something might be controversial?
Go ahead, T-Bot.
Cheese dog.
Cheese in the dog.
Fantastic.
But any sort of melted cheese on the hot dog.
That great.
Yeah, except I'm well documented on this program.
The Texas Tommy from high school.
Sure.
Was was unbelievable.
I listen. I don't know Sure, was unbelievable. I listen.
But I don't know if you did them.
I love a deli slot the Crab Shingo.
I love a deli slice piece of fucking white American cheese
on a diesel.
Underneath it?
Now they like, believe like cut it
and like you break it in half and put it,
it's not all the time, it's not my go-to,
but it's fucking, it's all right, a little dab will do you.
Not a hot dog talk on this show,
I'll tell you that.
We're too fat fucking idiots. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Speaking of which patty did get some uh, some little sausages. I want to say uh, the event that some place down here uh,
East Norton man.
Woo we.
I don't even need the coffee.
It's like snap wake up.
Here that snap from across the river.
God damn.
It's like a tree breaking.
Uh, yeah, but all the hot dog hot dog talk aside.
Yes. We got a God don't have business to do here
So goddamn broadcast the program. Yeah garbage you get into baby
It's a family episode when you sign up for patreon. We will answer your garbage question on the air and like we've said one two three
Million times. That's the greatest website of all time. We got more content on that goddamn website than you will believe
True blow your fucking hair back when you get on it
not your compression socks
All right, let's see here. This is from my wife's boyfriend. Is it garbage?
You get a rental car as a gift my mom always wanted to convertible so one year my dad rented one for her birthday
Man talk about
Oh fucking yeah, it have to really gingerly approach that. Now listen, there's something outside for you,
but it's going back Monday
and you gotta make sure the tank filled up.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
Then we gotta cover the tolls.
Which by the way, I like that flex
that you do on the road with the rental car.
You pay the thing up front
where you don't gotta fill the tank up.
That's,
cause fuck them. Yeah, but you're pre- fill the tank up. That's cuz fuck them.
Yeah, but you're paying your prepay in the gas.
That's it's in their best interest.
But the problem is I'm a forgetful friend.
You always forget, dude, you always forget.
Then you're worried about it.
Is it gonna be a little bit under?
That's why I'm buying peace of mind.
I'm just buying fuck.
And then when I do realize I'm like, oh, we gotta get to the airport in the morning
and we're like, you know, we're scraping the we're running on fumes
Sure, I'll go throw five six bucks in there just to get me there and then you're returning really jammer
Yeah, hey buddy, you must have the thotus thing in neutral coming out of the garage
Good luck figuring that but that's tough too because I think as a gift if you have a rental car
I I mean a convertible that's just such a generic thing and we won't think of you like I rented you at
1955 Chevy T-top what like something exotic and like a classic car, but just you just go and get like a
Sebring vibes sure that's what I'm saying they don't you know they don't have May box and shit you can rent
They're those apps that have all that's crazy. Yeah, I don't think that's it. I don't think this guy was doing that
Yeah, no, and it's also you have to have Destination and I was just something with cigarette burns in it. They were here when I got them for sure
I think you should have this shouldn't be the gift take it in will ride around town
It should be I'm taking it in your favorite dinner and then you walk out and you're like hop in a convert
Oh, that's nice. You got to go. It can't just be cruiser around.
Now get to the grocery store.
I feel that.
Feel that.
Feel that wind in your hair and grab some cheese dogs
for the bull.
Yeah.
Happy birthday.
You ready to watch me drive.
Hey, hey, you said you wanted to go to Home Depot.
So here you go.
You're not an authorized driver.
You gotta be in a business.
It's pretty trashy.
The, the, the fascination with the convertible
itself, I think I think I was the last time you were in one. I was in one head of hair like that.
You should be you should be whipping work that he told you should take the windshield to the
I was in one in in Hawaii when we were over there.
Actually, what am I talking about?
I did a pretty trashy thing.
I remember the BMW convertible was whipping around
the mad thing over there.
Could not fit in this car.
It was a fucking project every time.
And once I got in there, I was in there. There was no popping out for anything. Dude, it was fucking brutal. You have to take the steering wheel off like
it's a race car. Dude, it sucked. But when you're, but that's a little bit different. You're
on the H3 out there fucking heading over to the fucking other side of the island the winds whipping through your air. I get it. But there is an over.
I don't know.
It's sure. It's yeah.
No, I like that great.
No, wait, you're also crammed in one. You're not comfy. You're not fucking sitting pretty.
Also too, when the hoed, when the things not down,
you feel like you're driving around in a baseball hat.
Yeah, it feels like a cigarette boat when you're in here.
Yeah, it's so good.
It's like a tent, dude.
Yeah, it's a low hanging.
Yeah, and the back windshield is not glass.
It's like plastic.
What do people make in the temps that you're life?
Well, you worried about a fucking sharpshooter?
Fucking taking you out?
Yeah, I mean I don't know I'd wall I didn't know you did that. That's crazy. That's really that's like fucking
It was like soundcloud wrappers shit rent in a cool car to look cool and I'm filming video
I used to get a drone a bit of the bird on the hood
What's up y'all I'm stuck
You know how we live in camp, but talk about that Indochino baby Indochino wedding season is upon us you ain't lying
I got I got one next week weddings can be fun, but they could also be
Expensive expensive you got the gift you got the hotel, you got the hotel stay, you got the babysitter,
but you got to pick a little something up for the wedding.
You know what I mean?
A good time there.
Sure.
You get a little pricey.
Now I'm talking about T-bone.
Indochina will give you the perfect look at an awesome price.
Customize every detail of your suit shirt, thinner jacket, and more.
For an outfit you'll love to wear over and over and over again. Yeah gang. Uh,
if you're a bigger, bigger guy like us, a, a, you can't buy off the, buying off the rack,
you'll, you look like you're, you belong in a, in a goddamn cedar box. Jam,
tough. You look like you belong in the obituaries. It's a bad look. But they, they tailor it for,
for your, your big shoulders. If you got a big belly, if you got to set a man boobs,
whatever it is, they take care of you. Indochino tuxedo starting at just five hundred and seven nine dollars instead of good
I know instead of running a fucking mediocre suit that a little for three hundred
I know you can customize your own talks perfectly fit your body and style to really up your wardrobe game
Check out endocinos custom fitted shirts and casual where you can be killing a game all over the place
There you go, so it's easy to stay on trend and in style RSVP It's a great thing to do. I'm going to go to the window. I'm going to go to the window. I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window.
I'm going to go to the window. I'm going to go to the window. I'm going to go to the window. I'm going to go to the window. I'm going to go to the window. n o dot com promo code garbage indochino dot com code garbage do it gang get closer mass out there kids
kebab talk about express v p p u you mean someone who's got your god damn back
in this data this data world talk about closing the blinds when you're doing
your business you know what i mean gang netflix has tens of thousands of shows
mm-hmm but depending on your location sure can you get them can you this can
you that this is blacked out? This is blacked out?
This is not blacked out.
In 2023, we're not in our blockbuster anymore gang.
It shows a move is available only in your city
and who needs that?
Through yourself a favor, express VPN,
let you do just whatever you want to do
with a hundred different server locations,
you can access thousands of new shows. Yeah, for sure. I never really thought it was important and then they gave us,
they gave us a hook up. I got it. And it's not even for like, I don't want the government
to know what I'm doing, which is good. They shouldn't know what you're doing, what you're
perusing. It's also it blocks stuff of selling your data or these advertisers who's getting
what? Buying this, selling that. Nah, not what ExpressVPN.
They got your back, still trapped, baby.
It's compatible on all your devices, so you can watch all your favorite shows on your
phone, laptop, tablet, smart TV, surf, turf, whatever you want, baby.
With BlazingFestBee, you can stream with zero buffering and ExpressVPN, even encrypt your
data, so you can browse the web securely, baby.
That's what it's all about.
So be smart, stop paying full price for streaming service
and only getting access to a fraction of the content,
get your money's worth at expressvpn.com slash garbage.
Don't forget to use our link at expressvpn.com slash garbage
to get an extra three months free of expressvpn.
Who don't need something free expressvpn?
There you go.
Expressvpn.com slash garbage getting do it. Now back to the goshdard show. Back to the show. I don't need something free ExpressVPN? There you go. ExpressVPN.com.susgarb is getting do it.
Now back to the gosh, the one show.
Back to the show.
I didn't tell you that.
I don't think so.
Yeah, it was the same.
It wasn't even that much more than whatever the other one was.
Which I don't know what that means, but still.
Sure.
Whenever I've been in a convertible, I always feel like,
oh, this flips were just smushed.
Well, technically, no, the wind she, like,
Yes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I put also like, how often are cars flipping?
It's not like you've been in five cars that have flipped.
I drive like the wind, baby.
No, you are the worst driver in the world.
That has to have been a question.
Have you or anyone in your family
been inverted in their car?
Sure, man.
I remember one time when I was on 95.
And did you ever just like see something?
I'm like, I've driven a lot.
And this car was maybe 15 feet in the air,
hanging in a tree.
And the guys like, I'm all right.
I'm like, what the fuck are you doing?
How did that happen?
What?
He was in the car? Yeah, it's like it was like stop you know what?
Did you ever see like you like?
Like Jack has to like jump in the tree like you don't they don't get all the way down because like all the branches support
This dude is just to the wheels are spinning. Yeah, I'm like
Well, did you hit a kick kicker or something? What's going on here? That one cars are on fire. How does that happen?
They fucking they they explode. It's like are you grilling in the car?
There's a couple of spots on the Jersey Turnpike where yeah, dude it looks like it looks like burning man
Was there do clean it the fuck up. We it's not good
Somebody get that mr. Clean thing out there. You can see the flesh on the side of the room, dude
I don't need to drive by that shit
That's crazy. I just all it that used to do a really good job on a Jersey turn bike.
Now it's all jammed up.
And a lot of construction, there's a lot of shit like that.
Get a crew out there.
I don't want to fucking drive by that shit
and think about that poor son of a bitch.
I'm stuck in my car.
Yeah, dude, you just like that.
Well, I can't get out of my car.
Can you get out of my convertible?
Is it a parallel parking, your parallel is parking?
Yeah, it sucked.
And I felt like a, I felt like a fucking, like a Star Wars toy
inside the X-wing.
Like my legs were just completely straight like that.
Dude, it sucked.
Right down here on the floor, having to move it all the way down,
get it in there, plus with the valet at the hotel, I'm it all the way down get it in there
Plus with the valet at the hotel I'm taking like 10 minutes to get in the car
Fucking embarrassed I told you that your girl must have been slipping out of her seat, right? I'll honk like you
BEEP BEEP put it in put it in park
God put it in Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Jesus Shit there's under my leg the shift there's under my leg. I will say the Porsche pretty classy
I think the trashiest convertible of all time is the meada. I
Don't know yeah, it took a lot of heat when it came out
I remember when those things dropped for about two weeks. They were cool and then everybody turned on them
I don't think I mean it's yeah for about two weeks people thought they were cool and then everybody turned on them. I don't think it's like I need this.
Yeah, for about two weeks, people thought they were cool.
And then I don't know.
A lot of art teachers started buying them.
Stuff like that.
How lucky to see what we can get a Miata for.
New one?
I don't dare not make it on new.
Yeah.
What?
This is this guy.
Just.
Wait, I think I think I have 2023 at Mazda Mianna's.
Really?
No way.
Yes.
But just sticker on it.
No way.
What do they look like?
They kind of look like porches.
Mazda Mianna.
No kidding.
They must have brought them back.
They haven't been going full tilt since the 90s starting at
$28,000 or zero point. I present APR. They kind of do look like portions. Let me say he's
not wrong. No, I'm hearing lion folks. It's much better than the old ones. I'll tell you
that much. We'll get a pickup there. Let me see. Let me take a little peek at him. Try
and button. Try him. Yeah, but I feel like everybody they modeled around this car was
real short in real life. All the angles are like for real.
Yeah, that's not a big guy car.
I wouldn't say it looks like a Porsche.
It looks like one of those BMWs.
Yeah, a little bit.
I'm saying it don't look like a meana that you know.
It don't look like it's small.
Yeah, it don't look like the...
That's for unsuccessful dentists to drive around in, I think.
For divorced unsuccessful dentists.
The mid-range practice.
Yes.
Imagine rolling.
Maybe a tattoo to the house.
Yeah.
Or he works at another dentist office.
Yeah, he does not.
He's not his own spot.
Yeah, this is Dr. Sohn so he's new.
Yeah, he was working out in Hershey for a little while.
It's where he's doing his open mics, where he could have,
he could have deep.
Uh, yeah, that's not a, that's not a real wow call.
You can't pull up into me, yada.
No.
You'll catch some fucking shit for sure.
Uh, all right, let's see here.
This one's from James, $10 long Island trayish here.
Are you garbage if towards the end of your parents' marriage, your dad took over your twin
bread, your twin bed and you had to sleep on the floor?
They, oh my god, that is a tough look. I was like our buddy Brendan Sago. That's very sag-o-low-esque
Yeah, shout out to B-sags. I mean at some point he had a move into the den. What?
Dad took his room
Economically why make it worse on everybody listen. It's not working out. Let's keep it in the family
We're not fighting whatever It worse on everybody. Listen, it's not working out. Let's keep it in the family.
We're not fighting, whatever.
I guess, I don't know.
We only have a two bedroom.
Hey, the old man's gonna be staying with you.
It's probably the best time of his life.
I think you, as a dad, I think you gotta get the couch, no?
Sure.
I'm kinda put up a little curtain, be like,
this is my house, this is my room, over here.
One side, junior, me and your mom or beef and
Yes
Something kick your kid out on a goddamn floor. He's got school in the morning
The fuck
She's trying to get late. He's trying to fucking you know, he's bringing it to Shakespeare
He's trying to get the second base with a broad and fucking he's got no confidence. He's sleeping on a floor
Yeah, it's pretty trashy, man. I'm so glad that didn't happen with me.
I'm so glad it was a easy out.
And a little like the cash.
Sure.
Well, not really.
We went to he went to a motel.
Sure.
But wasn't like.
Yeah, it was not.
I mean, we didn't like Tony Soprano.
I'm going to be at the wall door for where the fuck you want to blossom.
Shit, I'd be getting divorced too if I could do that
Like him go state the plaza for an indefinite time get hookers in there
Still and Paulie Walnut's coming by yeah, what the fuck and some chicks
You know
Yeah, eating those big tober loans
Always comes back to you. I just watched the episode force for chocolate
I let's I get my own tober loans in a hotel room. You ain't got to tell me not I just watched the episode
All right, let's see this is from David 10 dollar mozo is it garbage will apply
Sun spray sunscreen in the house before going out. It's funny. I didn't think so but in Indy
Papped at it
Yeah, well you guys all were going outside and I was like oh fuck and then I did it and then I almost broke my neck
I know man you do it on the wrong you doing on a cheap wood floor. You're going down. Yeah
Hey, that's a fucking that's like quicksand for that. Somebody doesn't know yeah, and then they make a pivot on it
Yeah, I'll tell you what that stuff works pretty good
Sure and you know but you can't remember it was either you or new guy Luke They make a pivot on it. Yeah, I'll tell you what, that stuff works pretty good. Sure.
But you can't remember, it was either you or a new guy, Luke,
one of you just was like,
I was like, get my neck and you were fucking right up on it.
You gotta step back with that and spray nice.
That was me and let me ask you something.
Did your neck burn?
No, but I had Luke redo it.
I don't wanna have spots all over me.
Like you rub it in. You rub it in. You don't rub it in. Yes, you do. Why am I rubbing it in when it's got the spray?
I'll rub to make sure it's evenly done. It is evenly done. You do it nice with the spray.
No, that's how you miss thing. I'm telling you. Okay. I'm telling you. Check the instructions. It's probably doesn't say rub it in.
Well, I all I did was spray and I didn't get burned once out there. I robbed that a nice collar once.
Huh?
I robbed that I didn't get burnt once.
Well, and it recommends, which is something I've never done my entire life until this
trip was you're supposed to apply it in the shade and wait like 15 minutes.
Yeah, that's not.
Who's doing that?
No.
Yeah, you're jammed up, not sitting under the fucking tree for 15 minutes.
That's the same bullshit as don't need a half hour before you go into the water
Which can I say this you've never been in a pool? Huh, which means you've never been in a pool
There hasn't been a half hours and you've eaten oh, we got it. I don't think you did. I know when you don't get a joke
And I see you doing the math in your head
This might be more hard feelings, but say you know, we're going down a shore.
Sure, right?
We're going down the shore.
Hold on, don't take it off.
I apologize, but there is a big down the shore.
Most houses have a no sunscreen in a house rule for that reason.
Oh, it's a garage.
Though you do that.
You do that shit at Denise's house down there in North, why would you lose it?
Fucking bounced.
That guy, I can't allow back.
No kid. Yeah, maybe a couple passive aggressive monkeys. Tows down here in North Wildwood. Shall we lose it? Fucking bounced. That guy, I can't allow back.
No kid.
Yeah, maybe a couple passive aggressive monks.
I'm gonna tell it's slippery on his floor
and you know the fucking mums the word.
She's fucking digging at you.
But anyway, we're going down there.
We're going down the wildwood.
Yes.
In the middle of the summer.
There's been, unless I'm crazy,
it seems like there's something really going on in the ocean lately.
There's been a lot of-
Don't fucking start this and then you're never going to go in the ocean.
Don't be that guy.
I mean, dude, the poor fucking Russian guy and fucking Egypt, that was crazy.
In Egypt.
The fuck I, what's that got to do with North-Waw, what a kid?
The kid that jumped off the cruise ship.
And then there was a video,
like, you're jumping off the cruise ship anytime soon?
There was a video, then there was the kayaker
and Hawaii where a tiger shark just came right up to it
and trying to take a bite out of them.
And then for some reason I saw a video yesterday
there was all these dolphins trying to beach themselves
like a whole fucking bunch of them.
Some of us probably grilled some cheese dogs.
What a mess out.
Ha ha ha, he's cooking.
Yeah.
He's fucking beaching them.
It seems there's something.
Ah, yeah, I guess.
I mean, you named Egypt, the guy who jumped off a bull.
I think that's...
And Hawaii.
I think that shows that it's all over.
That would be like me if I was like, it was like a volcano went off 100 years ago.
Like if you just look at all the bad things that are happening constantly, they're always bad.
How many people went in the water and didn't get bit this week. I don't know.
Couple Hunter Mellie. I don't know. For sure. Seems a little sketch, a little fishy.
All right, I got a line on proper spray suntan usage. Hit me, you gotta rub it in. One way to ensure staying protected is spray close
to the skin, to ensure accurate coverage
with the spray sunscreen.
I highly recommend holding the nozzle to your skin
and spraying thoroughly.
Boom, I was helping you out.
I was able to do the skin.
Yeah, fucking burn in turn, baby.
Freeze it up.
I like that stuff.
Yeah, but you can't do that shit in the house.
That is a no fly because it's just in the air
It's on the ground. It's on the table. It's on the chair. Sure. You're you're walking through it the dogs looking at it gets on the lunch meat
Yeah, although it does kind of taste good in a weird way. Yeah, like lip gloss and it highly recommends you apply it outdoors to avoid inhaling any of the particles
Yeah, that's have to fun the head the
hailing any of the particles. Yeah, that's half the fun.
The, the, the, uh,
accelerants are whatever they use.
That's not good for you.
It's weird because they slow your brain down.
Take my chance.
Oh,
a room.
Oh,
a a a
a
a a
a a
a a a
a a a
a a a
a a
a a a
a a
a a a
a a a
a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a You shouldn't be drinking in a hospital at all let alone I don't care what kind of brain somebody had a baby
Celebrating somebody's on the way out. We want to have a well well
Post okay, this made it seem like he's killing time
He didn't give an event like hey was you know my pop-up was on his way out and we all shotgun to be here before you fucking
Before you fucking entered sandman, you know what I mean?
I was picturing a white styrofoam coffee cup. Yeah, I was picturing like chill the nurses coming, you know what I mean?
Jesus. What does that say about us, dude?
Yeah, that's pretty trash. Yeah, that's
That ain't great that and
Do you always hear stories of like someone sneaking a stripper in or a hooker for like their
Somebody just our uncle on the way out or something like that somebody just did that which I don't
No, I'm not thinking about that. I don't want some fucking skank in there. Why not? I want fucking father so and so
Let me know that I'm gonna that day. I'm not gonna get jammed up like up there
Let me know you better bring your sunscreen cuz you're going to help.
Now keep that real close to the skin fat boy.
Why you're burning for eternity?
You wanna wanna reapply?
Yeah, I want everybody in there.
The month senior nuns, the whole nine yards, give me something.
I'm not thinking about getting my noodle wet.
They're like a bad accountant.
Like I can't clean all this up.
What are you crazy?
It came to me
You should have at least filed that's half the problem. Jesus
Yeah, fuck that I'm not thinking about that shit. How do you know sitting there with a chubby? No
Me like I got a priest fucking eyeing you up. All right, you change the fucking snap one off
No, you be all shriveled up. You don't know I
Know how fear I works in me
What I know how I know when I'm afraid I'm not but you've never truly been afraid for your life
Sure I have
Now you're afraid you left a stove on or you know you called somebody by accident
Either way.
Get a 48 minute voicemail from here.
I don't want some chick from fucking the lilac in there.
I think.
I want the old fish up there.
I think you're looking at this, that's why.
I think you're looking at this very narrow minded.
I don't want it either, but I'm saying I can see a world
where if I'm like, hey, I'm on my way out, it's been a while.
Yeah. I'm a clean of bipes'm on my way out. It's been a while.
Yeah, I'm a clean of pipes, you know what I mean?
At least what?
Showed the heaven with my head on straight.
Not acting like a fool, as soon as I get there.
That's what I'm saying, you know what I mean?
Hitin' on every broad and wide.
Maryland, how you doin'?
I got here comes Gippy.
Like a rabbit dog
St. Peter's
All right, this one's from Xavier is it garbage if the barbecue place in your town replace the old funeral home
I don't think I could eat there man. I'm not like a big I guess I kind of am a a big heebie, jeebies guy, but that's just weird to me.
I can't do it.
The ribs are to die for.
Yeah.
And then also like, do you think they got the same
smoker, the same broiler, whatever?
Oh, that they cooked the people in?
I don't know.
Those things get hot though.
It's the same gas.
Take about that.
It's about that seared.
There's no way they're gutting the whole thing.
Those things're heavy.
There is a I couldn't I couldn't.
I've talked to you guys about it.
It would have to.
I couldn't.
Yeah, no, absolutely.
There's there's an old Chinese place in China, my hometown.
That was like then it was like it was like a like a sit down Chinese spot,
which I've always said are the best
Rolling in there on a Friday night. Oh man real classy place real nice close down
They're turning into like some kind of elementary school
Get the fuck out of here one of those like charter type things
Something like that yeah, but like yeah, those like
And
The funeral home Into a barbecue joint But like yeah, those like And Whatever the
Funeral home into a barbecue joint. That's nuts. I don't even like go into something that used to be a law law
No, what I mean no, I don't like that or something used to be a bank or something
I'm like I this was a Wendy's and now it's a bank that like that was used about one by Astor place
There was clearly a Wendy's and now it's a Chase bank. Yeah.
I'm in there salivating, trying to get my check clear.
No, I don't like it.
I don't like it.
They tried to turn a Burger King into a dry cleaners.
That didn't work.
I guess the drive thru's there though.
That's probably pretty good.
Who does drive thru dry cleaning?
Ars had it growing up.
Really?
Yeah.
Pass it through the window.
Wouldn't everything get wrinkled, getting it through the window?
I think they would open up your back door.
Like if it was hanging on the back, like hanging on the hook,
you pull up to a window and it was like a sliding glass door.
Really?
Maybe there's only this one, I don't know.
Wait a minute, wait a minute, hold on.
It wasn't like a drive-through window.
It was a whole thing.
Cause that's pretty cool.
Yeah, it was a sliding glass door.
And they would just open your back door and put it on the hook. Yeah, or like take it off the hook. They
open up the door. You're there. They fucking pull it off. They go, okay, what do you got
three suits? Okay, whatever, whatever. Here's your ticket. You're gone. That's all right.
Pick it up. I open up the back door, hang it up there, have a nice day zip zaps who that's all right
Is that not a thing?
I've never heard of anything like that in my life really and we're big dry cleaning shout out the Earl's
He was at the cutting edge of it. Wow. Did you hear that?
And you're sitting there in silence after hearing his god damn it. That's fucking real good
But then my sister worked as the biggest pain in the ass is getting it on that hook and the back seat.
Sure.
Jamie up.
That's like one of those CIA sky hook drops.
Really scooped the guy off the ground.
Yeah, like they didn't batman begin.
Yup.
I keep getting those tick tocks or Instagram videos
of the train, the delivery system,
the mailman on the train, do you ever see that?
And like remote towns or whatever,
like they don't stop the train,
but there's a mailman on the train
who delivers to each town.
And there's like a big pole that they got a hook
the outgoing mail.
Like they all, the town gathers their mail
and puts it in like one of those like canvas bags.
It's like locked and it's hanging on a thing
and a guy comes up with a hook, scoops it,
and leaves the same, like leaves one.
He's got a hook to bag ofops it, and leaves the same, like leaves one, he's got a, he's got a hook to bag
of the incoming mail and grab the outgoing mail.
Really?
And I am all about it.
Cause I like the videos.
It is, it is mail delivery at its highest form.
I like the videos of the boats coming by the dock
and they have some green horn jump off right on the dock.
Grab the man who's got to get back on it.
Sometimes he don't make it, that's pretty fun.
Yeah, that's a good time. You gotta give. You know, let me show him. Yeah.
No, that's about my big fan of that too. Yeah, man. That's that's got to be exhilarating. That's got to be scared. We see the guys getting on the
On the ships and like the ant ant Arctic where they're like on ice and the ship comes by and they, and
they, and they get on and off real quick. I don't think so. But as a kid who grew up on
boats in, you know, like fucking contumboats or small crab boats or fishing boats in
wildwood and like the polka nose. Yeah, I'm talking about oil tankers in an
Arctic. I, yeah, I understand. You can't lose the dude guy who's never been on a boat before.
Not you catching sunnies.
I know.
I'm relating to the story that you just told.
Go ahead, you squash buckler.
Tell us the tales of this story.
No, as a young kid, that was the coolest thing.
You felt like you were a re-one of those guys
when you're pulling up to the dock
and you're like, I get to jump off or grab the thing.
Like, can you do that? Can you jump and you're like, I'm going to get to jump off or grab the thing.
Like, can you do that?
Can you jump off and do like the lasso around the around the, I mean, you don't, lasso.
Wait, if you're jump off, you don't have to throw it.
You just jump off with it and fucking tie it up.
Yeah, fucking.
My knots aren't good, but I'll get it on there.
And then someone had to come take, you know, redouble knot it.
I was, I was putting a winger knot on it.
Taking on the pump.
Working the forehead bandit. Yeah
But that was exhilarating as a kid. I'm like, all right
I'm gonna and I never like when I got to do it where they'd be like Kevin
It's like the fucking whole world so in your show like you're gonna sink if you don't fucking get up there and get the bumper out
You know what I mean? Oh?
My dumbass almost got hit by a propeller one time
bumper out you know what I mean? Oh my dumbass almost got hit by a propeller one time.
Oh, we weren't talking but we were, we were,
they were slowing down for the kids to jump off.
I must have been like 11 and my dumbass jumped straight
off the front of the boat and got instantly
rode over by the boat.
Jesus Christ.
Really?
Yeah dude.
It was all good.
Life jackets scooped me around the side.
Jellad.
I kissed me anxiety. We were in
We were in like I wouldn't get into it was completely turned off
Yeah, cuz you're no fun if that propeller catches you you're monkey me
I hit the surface like my bad dude my buddies dad was like holy shit. Yeah
And like wall-pull pack the prop felt the prop fell off our boat, like the fucking
hand, like the bobby pin hinge or whatever, like broke or something.
So then we're fucking, we're, we're rudderless.
We got nothing.
But luckily it happened at the dock.
I think they might have been fixing or changing it or something and it happened at the
dock.
We went down there and got it.
I mean, we did, that was our job the whole weekend.
That was like, we felt like deep sea divers.
That was like, forget fishing, forget all.
That kids of honor.
Forget a wave runner, forget up.
Start Kevin Ryan.
Forget a bonfire, dude.
We were fucking, I don't like that knife in my mouth.
I was going down ready to see an octopus.
I was, it was it, man.
Fighting a giant squid.
Oh, dude, I was frequency shit too
Like trying to open my eyes in a lake Kevin Ryan in four feet under the lake
People are just standing next to me
Searching with their feet. Wow, that was big too. Searching with your feet not a lake what in a lake? Yeah, never
I mean, yeah, I don't my pinkies aren't touching that muck
Sure, I don't even like the beach with the sand. You don't like anything fun a lake drugs in a room
Yeah, I'm saying it's not ideal, but it happens drugs in a room it happens
You gotta get it key toes when you're out there having a good time
No, I couldn't agree with Foleymore, dude good. Yeah,, I'm not saying like, I wasn't like, reveling in it, but it happens.
Man, my cousins lived out.
I think I might have been rocks too, at the shore.
My cousin lived out at Serene Lake's, California,
which was a beautiful lake.
But would you say it's Serene?
It was very Serene, near Lake Tahoe.
And we were out there swimming one time
and you swam through like a patch of like late grass.
Oh, yeah, it's not great.
Dude, it was like Medusa was fucking coming at you
from the depths.
Yeah, no way no.
You just really gotta go.
I just gotta get through this.
Cause you start panicking, you start panicking more
than more stuff dodges you.
You just gotta go.
I'm just trudging through this.
Talk that freak me out.
First time I went to a Costco was out there too biggest muffins I ever seen in my life
There was big four packs of muffins they give you a Costco. No never was never a Costco guy
We were a Sam's Club earth for a safe dang short term, but I mean I might have been there two or three times sure
That was like that was like getting into fucking
The White House for us
We like how to call my stepdad who had the thing old take. Yeah, yeah, it was petty petty petty
Used her use false credentials for I think a couple of years at Costco and Sam's clubs
Everybody asked my name's Colleen. Oh, la coma is stars
Don't they start love muffins big sombrero
He pointed in the way of the the refried beans please
Speaking of this is a from Amanda what's the trashiest class trip you fell has ever been on mine was fourth grade
We went to Wegmans. What the fuck?
Which for the grocery store?
And you're not aware Wegmans is a fancy grocery store though.
Yeah, kids get in here.
I got a big order.
Yeah, to some teacher was lazy.
Yeah.
Do any hard work in her summer house?
That's, I mean, that's a, I mean, what do you do?
Maybe I guess you got to go for like,
you got to be learning, the thing was,
they were always learning about something.
You know what I mean?
You go to the-
I wasn't the AP classes, I could tell you that.
No, I think that was taking a tour of the loading dock.
Learning to be a single man in his mid 30s.
Yeah, it's fucking selling weed out of the deli.
And this is where I rip heaters on my break.
You can when your kids got a light.
Yeah, I remember my boy worked for a long time in the meat department at an, at an
acme.
Okay.
Quality quality operation.
Quality operation.
It was before he found his career,
whatever, and he was working there,
and he was like, dude, it made it,
it seemed real nice,
because he's like, we go every day,
meet the apartment, and a crock pot there.
So he goes, we go in,
and if I was working like an eight, nine hour shift,
or whatever.
I'm listening.
Beginning of the shift to crank up the crop pot,
whatever they had, you know, whatever was laying around.
Sure.
Uh, this filet got stepped on or whatever.
Shot that up.
Fucking throw it in.
Come three, four, five hours later.
They're all back there just fucking up.
Going to town.
And I was like, I genuinely envy you.
That is amazing.
All-time work, make work better mood.
Sure.
Little work side hustle.
Uh-huh.
That's huge.
That and our, uh, that and who the,
I think it was Big Brie from Jersey,
our boy Big Brie from Jersey.
Yep, sure.
I would have seen another time's microwave
on the work truck.
On the work truck. You knew whatever you want your work
He's a you know, he works construction so he's out there on a roads and shit like that
Nuke it up. I was like, I see now one or two other times very smart. You know, there's some guy in some office
Shogun office job in the middle of Ohio with a big green egg on the roof dude smoking me
Oh, yeah, yeah, the cubicle. Sure.
I'm gonna take a phone call. Be right back.
Anytime working at a restaurant that did like a good family meal was always fucking awesome.
And it was also awesome every once in a while. Like if it was slow and it was a little bit
later in the shift and like a Thursday night, the boys in the kitchen would throw something
together. Sure. Something off the menu.
I have the Geno Z's I work out in Chicago.
Every now and again they bust out some Minuto
that would knock your socks off to you.
Yeah, that's all right.
What's Minuto?
It's like a Mexican.
Popularity's banned.
Yes, that's Ricky Martin, wasn't he a Minuto?
I think he was, right?
That was him.
Ricky Martin was a Minuto, yeah.
I remember these
five dude Giuseppies I worked at Giuseppies as a boss boy and we would get two
slices of pizza or a salad and a bowl with spaghetti or something
spaghetti that was what you know wasn't my cup of tea I was more of a spaghetti yeah
but it was just not love pizza place spaghetti you don't say yeah I know you
very well documented.
You perfectly authentic in the sauce.
It's just the same sauce from the pizza.
So that's a little zest to it.
Yeah, no, just wasn't as good.
Yeah, it's fine.
It was fine.
I'm not shitty.
It's not really a spaghetti guy.
No, I gotta be loyal to my feet.
I'm working.
You're not a pasta guy.
I am for sure.
Are you?
Yeah, but just like generic
Pasta, I don't know just yeah a couple fucking sleazy's out the door in a while cherry Pepsi what the fuck are we talking about here?
Okay, I'm a fucking fat 10-year-old all right
Signs as pizza dude. Yeah, give me the fuck. I'm not saying I'm sure you're very well. Yes. I'm sure there's pasta
It's good. I'm fucking slice man throwin through okay
So you skipped the salad porky. Yeah, never once did I get it? I was like get the fuck out of the real salad
Yikes, I used to make them they were like the house out like hey, we need three house salads for whatever and I was my job
And I'm like dude, I don't you I spurgon one all of you. Yes, but it was that what you fucking two shoe string fucking pieces of
Carrot or whatever Bergen one all of you that's what it was that we do fucking two shoestring fucking pieces of character whatever
Man those two slices of pizza. I still think it like they were the five after a hard shift You sit down all these fucking all these fucking these brawls are counting their tip money cranking heaters in the back
How you couldn't tell me shit too big triangle slices
fucking good little bit of a rag on a maybe some Parmesan
seat on a bus pan fucking put me out dude it was great
some of my best slices in the world were there perfect they've
been sitting around for a little while they throw them about
to my two you live quite the life Kippy, I'll tell you that. You're like a regular J Peterman. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha $10, hey, me, is the garbage have a hot tub on the ground floor of your split level home on the carpeted floor?
Whoa.
I've seen this one other time.
How much coke you're moving a week?
Yeah.
And we talking key.
Yeah, you gotta be moving some heavy weight.
Well, there's, this is, I've seen this one time before.
Living room.
Ground floor.
This was basement. It was one of those like the house was built on a hill so the whole Ground floor. This was basement.
It was one of those, like, the house was built on a hill,
so the whole back of the house was exposed.
You know what I mean?
Okay.
You could walk out the basement.
But this guy, I'm imagining, it's like an in-ground pool.
It's not on the floor.
It's in the floor.
No, this is...
That's what this guy's talking about.
No, this is a hot tub on the ground floor.
So it's a hot tub on the first floor of the house.
Okay, this is my thing.
Not in the floor, if it's in the floor,
I think that's a little classier.
Hot tubs don't belong inside.
No, jacuzzi's do.
Hot tubs belong outside.
Jacuzzi's.
Yeah.
What's the difference?
A hot tub stays full.
You don't fill a hot tub
Okay, you fill with Jacuzzi. No, you mean like a Jacuzzi tub
Yeah, but your mom probably has like what used to yeah, yeah, because when I read it all those houses all the brawls
I got those tubs
Jacuzzi's yeah, that's the first time I saw a shower and a bathtub separate
When my aunts and my aunt uncle read their bathroom.
Uh-huh.
Blue me away.
I didn't know where to pee, huh?
No, no.
Don't.
Where do I go?
Whole neighborhood was over there.
Sure.
What do you got, T-Vote?
Can I blow your mind?
Sure.
Okay, hot tub is the name we use to describe a tub filled with hot water for people to
relax on.
Jekuzi is a brand.
Oh, no, I know that.
I didn't know that.
Really?
Yeah.
Jekuzi. It's like Kuzi's next issue. Yeah, Jekuzi is a brand. Yeah, no, I know that. I didn't know that. Really? Yeah. Jacuzzi. It's like who's next issue. Yeah, Jacuzzi is the brand. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
For sure. Shit.
But a hot tub in the house. So you're wrong.
No, not at all. Yeah. Why? Is Jacuzzi only inside?
You said a hot tub was for outside. Jacuzzi was for inside. Here's my this is my rule.
I'm saying I don't think you should just have a hot tub full with water with that lid on it constantly cooking in your house which was what my friend used to have
which was insane. Okay. It sounds like you're it's fog up the windows. Yeah it smells like the
fucking YMCA in there. Sure. That's what I'm saying. You should yeah not to live in. You should
drain anything you're doing in the house should be drained You got to fill back up. Yeah, that's what you should do. There shouldn't be chlorine in your house
Right, can you will you give me that I give you that there shouldn't you shouldn't have a body of water with chemicals
Constantly 102 degrees in your house. That's insane to me. I'll give you that that belongs outdoors. Okay
Jacuzzi yeah, Jacuzzi is a brand name all all all Jacuzzi are hot tub so not all hot tub is Jacuzzi, yeah, Jacuzzi is a brand name. All Jacuzzi are hot tubs and not all hot tubs are Jacuzzi, dude.
There you go.
There you go.
That's pretty good.
Look at this, we're learning today.
Yeah, we really are.
Uh, alright.
Yes, that's trash.
The mold in the carpet alone.
Yeah, the smell.
From the steam, man.
God damn.
That house has a drop ceiling for sure.
Sure. And it is brown, dude. Oh, yeah a couple of water
Water stains on here and also wouldn't you want it outside? I guess the temperature like
You cuz you would want to be cooler. So I guess it's not
It would have to be in some type of bathroom setting this is living
That's what I'm saying my buddy had it in the base. I blew my mind. I was like what do you guys shooting porn in here?
This is fucking nuts. Was it a finished basement? Yeah, was there a there's a computer right next to it was there
Sliding glass door to get outside down there
Yeah, but not right there not near it on the other side
What about a cold plunge indoors in a basement? Of course. It's the way to go. Yeah, I'll
give you that. I'd give you that. Love to have that. That's a little different. No chlorine again.
And no steam. And functional. Very true. Yeah, I don't. A body of water in the house that's just
constantly full. I want to get one for the roof, but I don't know if it'll hold
That'd be a jam up you end up on the fifth floor
I'm angry I live upstairs
Is this your girl
How long he's been together
What are you watching John Wick do hey that pasta from a pizza place?
Alright gentlemen Hey, so you're not pasta from a pizza place. Yeah, all right gentlemen. All right, this one's from Sean
Is it garbage to have a negative balance on cash app my buddy has a negative $300 balance?
How do you get that? I?
Sounds like you got away with something. Yeah, I've been Jean. I think his things process if you have you're using it as a payment
And I'm sure some sort of bank. There's some sort of delay, these dirt bags are figuring out.
Uh huh.
As one who used to do it.
Sure.
You know, I know my way around a banking day.
Sure.
Processing.
There's got to be something that's hooked up to that,
that automatically charge or something.
I used to roll that die.
Oh, it's one of my favorite things.
You want to live a little?
TD bank.
So got the Pinkerton's looking for me for that one
I should be on the three-ten to Yuma Wells Fargo coming after you you can buy stocks on cash app
Really? Yeah, which if you got a cash app portfolio that thing is tankin
And so you're playing the market T-bone got it all in Mountain Dew. I got one-one hundredth of a share of pizza hut.
Uh.
I make it decisions in the boardroom.
And the bedroom.
They're all pushing that the flipped over pizza now.
The, what's it called?
Pizzone?
Need kind of.
Well, it's a calzone-esque type of thing.
Yeah, but it's crispy.
It's like, it's like a slice flipped over.
They're all pushing it. I think Papa John's kicked it off-ass type of it. Yeah, but it's crispy. It's like, it's like a slice flipped over. They're all pushing it.
I think Papa John's kicked it off first, the Papadilla.
Papadilla.
Whoa, I gotta get eyes on it.
Oh, one shack got in there.
He really started making some changes.
Hey, everything, he should be on Shark Tank.
Everything he touches, he's done.
I think he has gold.
Hensy.
I know Charles Barkley has.
What's he doing? I dude, it's kicked off from the way stop that. Yeah. Charles Barkley has what's he doing? Dude's cake stuff from the way stop that yeah Charles Barkley. That's all Shaq money from TNT
What's Charles investing in to those dudes are like great? I know Shaq owns forever 21. I heard I dude Shaq kills it
Shaq has never been on Shark Tank, but he has been in a shark cage on Shark Week.
Ooh.
It's close enough.
I mean, that counts.
That shark was that in.
That shark was shitting in his pants.
I'll tell you that.
Was that in Egypt?
Where was that?
Um, all right, let's do, uh, let's do one more here than we got our rampart up gaming.
This one's from Darrell, $10 Investor.
Is it garbage have people in your family who refer to as big
and little instead of senior and junior,
such as big Terry and little Terry or big Jenny
and little Jim, big Jenny stuff, big Jenny.
Big Jenny will fuck you up.
Yeah, I have, we have big Mike and little Mike.
Big Jenny makes a mean hoogie dip though, I'll tell you that She does something that knocks everybody socks off
Everything's giving and she got a bit of a two tour. Oh, yeah, you're dumb. Yeah, they call on people dickhead
You know, where's a one-piece suit big Jenny. Oh, big Jenny can rock the jumper.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, shot out.
Or some car heart overalls.
Sure.
Yeah, we got big mic, little mic, and big mic.
It's like out of a fucking, big, you know, little mic is a fucking house.
Yeah.
Big mic, little mic is now big mic.
Yeah.
Okay, this is from Chris.
Philly Bozo here, shout out to it.
Is it garbage that jump in the swimming pool instead of taking a shower after a haircut
gets all the hair off you and you get a little exercise in as well?
That's a pro move though.
Because I feel like the shower, if you submerge.
I need full shower after a haircut
I need full shower I need hair wash ears wash the whole nine yards otherwise I'm itching
up and down the block plus you're getting all that goddamn hair in the filter
I think Patty's gonna come yelling at you for that you're fine you've found a frog in
that filter all the time man I used to scare the shit out of you. Open that up to that fucking thing staring at you. It's perps sunglasses on. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Rip it a heater. Yeah.
Oh, my daddy to come get him. This is how when your piss tastes weird, buddy.
You gotta check that. Frogs in a pool, shout out to him. All right, we gotta wrap it up, gang.
Gang, we love you to death and we will see you next week. Peace!
We gotta wrap it up gang gang. We love you to death and we will see you next week. Please