Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Kayce Smith: Barstool Belle
Episode Date: December 3, 2020Kippy and Foley are back with a classic episode with Kayce Smith from Barstool. The boys put Kayce to the test as they get into trashy first cars, beer pong, keg stands, tattoos, and Texas. its a HOT ...one! Bonus Episodes: www.Patreon.com/AreYouGarbage Get a Shirt: www.PodcastMerch.com Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/foleygrams Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans?
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Welcome to another exciting edition of are you garbage the show where you find
out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash now
here are your hosts Kevin Ryan and H Foley hey everybody out there and
welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast this is are you garbage is the
show we sit down with your favorite comedians and find out they grew up
classy or if they're absolute trash I'm your host H Foley coming at you on a
beautiful day down here and to these basement for the holidays it smells like
I see hot and that's the way we like it my co-host is coming at you from right
next to me he is the CEO the chairman of the board he's on the lease here at AYG
give it up for my best pal kippy Kevin James Ryan everybody hey what's up
everybody thanks for tuning in as always please make sure you rate review
subscribe on iTunes full video available on YouTube check it out those
numbers are true to roof thanks to T bone over there also patreon.com slash are
you garbage you guys sign up for bonus content videos bonus episodes every week
also we're gonna be doing a live stream at the end of every month where we ask
you questions you ask us questions it's gonna be a fucking who get involved yes
sir I love you buddy okay shout out to our producer extraordinaire the
Chicago kid the fucking magic man we know him by T bone around here Toby
McMullin hey he does not like the new nickname made a few words over there in
the DJ booth I like it but gang we cannot and I mean cannot got a hot one we
got a hot one we got a little fucking star power in his dump not the bozos you
usually see on the show yeah not the animals we drag in off the street that's
right our guest today is an incredibly successful sports broadcaster reporter
and host of multiple podcasts okay she has worked as a sideline reporter for
Fox Sports she's worked at ESPN the SEC Network ESPNU of course Sirius XM she is
a graduate of Texas A&M University and of course one of the co-host of the
pro football football show with Deion Sanders and one of the stars over there
at Bar Stool Sports but the big question but he's mine today is she
garbage I don't know I saw a Louis Vuitton bag walk through the door and you
called it a coach and I called it a coach bag so I'm pretty fucking impressed
I'll tell you that right now give it up for Casey Smith everybody come on thank
you for inviting me to the basement thanks for coming on down close the door
on your way in just for legal purposes we're on the first floor she is not
technically in a basement thank you for having me so when you when you run
through everywhere I've worked it sounds like I might be a successful person
successful person come on thank you thank you but now I'm at Bar Stool Sports so
you can just erase all the rest no way what are you all class in my book
do you say you're garbage you're not so I say I'm not garbage but it's usually
because I think my parents aren't garbage okay but I think as an adult I
might be a little bit slipped into some garbage well if you talk about my
college years now so I guess it really depends on how you guys weigh this I'm
very interested to see how we weigh this well we found out you know people that
come from like you know decent families good families you know maybe wealthy
families or so it once they start make it once the kids start making their own
decisions that's where it really shows that you know they don't really follow
the family trends you know what I mean they tend to be pretty garbage yeah I
like to believe that I've gone back towards the good trend of my parents
I'm gonna let you guys decide that I hear you guys are the absolute totem pole
of whose garbage we are the authority on trash an owner on a waste management
company we are well I've talked to both of you about about leftovers yeah we
was the big thing that I mean that kind of took that was when it kind of you
know KFC your buddy also from barstool good friend of ours shout out the KFC
he kind of we the leftovers debate took fucking took the internet by storm for
a couple of days which is crazy it's people latch on to that shit so easily
like we do a radio show every day on series sex and together and so we'll be
talking about important things in the world not one call we talk about if you
should take leftovers a billion calls sure and I mean it hit and I got to hear
how both of you feel if you're on my side yeah definitely take leftovers nuts
and me and KFC are on the same side because he texted me goes dude you got
to go into the radio show we're talking about leftovers and I don't know to me
it's also I'm never in a position where there is leftovers this is tired ground
we've gone over this a lunch but I'm never in a position where there is
leftovers and I don't see how you are either this is what this is what I don't
understand no him I know I just want to make sure yes I'm calling him back for
sure that's a that's a major theme I purposely a major theme why this is a
pro-fat shaming show I will not be doing that I make sure that we overorder a
little bit at the restaurant especially I got to do my girlfriend I know she's
not gonna finish it of course not and that's the best is finishing her half
at home when we're watching a movie or something like that you don't even let
her finish it she wanted to she wanted to eat the leftovers when you guys got
home would it be never does man never does she might say hey I'm gonna take
this home and eat it but she never does see I actually eat it when I get home
or the next day now it does depend on what it is I'm not taking bar food home
I don't know sure you're not gonna do like chicken tenders and mozzarella
sticks or something I'm not why because it's not good when it's reheat thank
never reheat a monster I love a cold mozzarella stick you know what I've
had some cold mozzarella today too but I I'm more think of take-home stuff it's
like steak and mashed potatoes sure gets like that always tastes good the next
day yeah you can't be heating up chicken tenders hey well I mean yeah I
you saw my reaction bridge that gap it's okay fatty don't worry I'm not gonna
eat a cold mozzarella stick he's like what I start crying how drunk am I
come on what are we doing fucking drunk with some cold nachos turn the lights
off cold it's about to get weird oh yeah we are in a basement legally the
fourth floor all right so give us the backstory now Texas A&M I'm just gonna
say that's no that's no slouch of an organization well thank you that's a
pretty good school I appreciate it you have to be in the top 10% of your class
to get in there which you were not I am I went to a private high school
Catholic I was a big Catholic school there was like 300 of us graduating
which in Texas is you know pretty big private school but I have to tell you we
wore the full Catholic schoolgirl uniforms like you know it was plaid
skirts knee socks the whole thing so I went to private school my entire life
because like I've said my parents are very classy suburbs of Dallas you said
yeah Arlington Texas so that's where the Cowboys Stadium is right between
Dallas and Fort Worth I grew up in an Episcopalian school Baptist Church
Catholic high school so my parents really wanted to fuck me up they weren't
like no we were we went to a Baptist church because my dad played guitar at
the Baptist Church but I wanted to play basketball so I played AAU and my head
coach was the varsity coach at the private high school I went to okay follow
that yeah you get recruited to go there uh no I wasn't very good but I most of
my AAU was good right yeah I was like the last the last person on the roster I
was good enough to make the team if I got to play we threw a party so you were
going to private school no matter what no matter what because the district that
we lived in in Arlington it was right on the edge of his school that my parents
like yeah and then I just stayed so yeah so again mark I'm mark this down I
can only see this can go now this is the the least garbage thing I'm about to
tell you okay get it out of the way I grew up playing the harp wow right there
that is me yep that's an actual photo of me yeah I started playing in
kindergarten I don't think I've ever I don't think there's any I've never had
my parents have one at their house yes your parents got a little bit
gay you got some disposable income but I will say my parents will I know they're
gonna listen to this sorry mom and dad for all the stories but again I work at
fucking Barstool so you already know them anyways yeah they sorry Ron sorry
Marty I know I know they're they're great so we the school that I went to
like and I we were upper middle class the school I went to was like wealthy
wealthy you were like I was like the poor kid you know I got a Honda Civic when
I turned 16 thought it was the coolest thing ever my best friend got a Porsche
like so that you know so my parents mom and dad I'm telling the truth I promise
so I'm the civics all right though yeah 16 year old was it a stick or an
automatic it was automatic I can't drive okay I can't drive a stick it's
classy Cassie the Civic she had a nice little spoiler oh very nice what color
was it silver yo I've named every car I've ever had and that is so garbage so
garbage you're naming your car like people with Mercedes aren't naming it
you know your name in your city car to make it cute and lovable no one's
hopping in their fucking beam or be like all right Ted let's go
but I was also trying to rebel a little bit against my Catholic school
just situation I hung a red bandana from the rear view mirror because I thought
that I was the biggest Lil Wayne fan on the planet shout out to Lil Wayne yeah
so yeah but only when I got away from my parents you know where they couldn't
necessarily hear what I was the same I would turn it down on my block a little
just because I'm a respectable guy you know what I mean but you got some
footloose music in your neighbor I can't be bumping I mean we're gonna we
grew up at a cul-de-sac you know I mean it's one man in one man out everybody
knows it's me I would just turn it up a little bit louder as I get on the highway
but I am I have a younger sister she my only sibling she's three years I'm a
much better person than me okay she works in non-profit she works for an
orphanage that kids that have been in really bad situations and I tell dick
jokes on the radio you can tell you the favorite child yeah um what wait I want
to go back to the car real quick okay did you do anything to like trick it out
did you put like a head unit in it or speakers or anything or just kind of
stock as is got it put the bandana on fake rims no fake rims spinning hub caps
no no no so you can't I don't think you can roll up to a Catholic
I don't think that's a 20s rockin yeah I don't think that they allow that they'd
be like this like bumping many men or so father Mahoney what's up many men yeah I
think that the fathers and the sisters would have had a problem with that but
no what's the deal with this Smith girl break dancing and shit yeah yeah and of
course the Catholic school it's like you know everybody's like doing drugs and
stuff in the bathroom I was I was too good for that I was kind of prudish
growing up so that was so that was a that was my my child and now I another
thing I did grow up going to a country club and we would bring home chicken
fingers and reheat them so I do want you to know that that's we were talking
that's the duality of man taking chicken fingers home from your private
country Jesus Christ they made a mean finger though the pool the chicken
fingers I mean come on my brother belongs to one and we go like when I go
back home in the summer whatever but go all the kids of what we're going over to
the pool and dude that they come out in that red and white little fucking
basket taking me back my my our favorite dessert my dad's was the other's white
powdered donuts the you know that yeah I don't know I can't no not at all I was
like are you judging me right now you judging my dad's favorite dessert I'm
on board with it of course they would restock them at the country club for my
sister and I because they knew how much we loved it was at the sleeve of the
many oh the sleeve there was like what like five in there yeah I don't I don't
really know which way I am right now I can't I can't I'm on the fence too well
I mean playing the harp though has to be the harps pretty good okay so we're
gonna do now is we're gonna ask you a series of questions oh boy determine
whether in fact you are garbage or not we're gonna go back to the beginning we're
gonna do this one by the numbers all right we're going back to the beginning
okay we're gonna start off now you said upper middle class outside of Dallas
we're gonna see mm-hmm what was the name of the street that you grew up on
Washington Drive pretty classy damn damn Washington heard of them that's
pretty good I live around Washington yeah was it a cul-de-sac a loop or was it
just a street it was a regular street but my backyard was the sixth
t-box of the country club so Washington Drive had a lot of golf course
property was it the country club that you were a member yes so it was one of
those neighborhoods that's a that's a neighborhood and a country club well you
could be a part of the country you didn't immediately get into it so it's not
like a gated community where you know is open open streets if you wanted to be a
member of the country club you could also be what is your dad do can I ask you
that yeah of course he's a mortgage banker night in a little bit of gage so
my when I was born my mom worked for the bank in New York then she was a stay-at-
home mom with my sister and I then she got her master's degree at TCU in art and
then now she does a bunch of charity work damn you come from fucking good Kennedy
compared to him compared to him what no the queen of fucking English
she does she she worked for for an older folks home she did some PR she did go
back to work when we were both in high school because she was like probably
just sick of us and she's like I needed probably help 2008 was hard on the
family she's on and off has worked in PR and now she's the coronavirus is kind
of kept her at home but got you you know she did get her master's degree so I
mean that's pretty good that's pretty good that's nice around the holiday
yeah beautiful beautiful growing up I assume it was a single family home you
had a garage we did have a garage in that garage it's a big big big no way
this question I know in a fucking yes I know and I bet you it was stock to the
hills did you have a garage did you have a refrigerator in that garage fuck yeah
yeah what was in that fridge a lot of soda a lot of Dr. Pepper is that big in
Texas or is that was that you guys just a doctor I think it's both okay my dad
is my dad's a huge soda dessert candy guy and he's I mean that thing was
stocked full of Dr. Pepper I love it I don't think I had a coke until like I
went to school like I it was Dr. Pepper and Sprite because we had Akash thing
who's from Dallas comedian comedian buddy of ours we mentioned Mr. Pibbs to him
and he almost why it's what's the deal with that what Dr. Pepper's I don't text
his company no I don't know I think Mr. Pibbs is just super read I don't think
Mr. Pibbs is gross I mean that's like shit I could get on the street of New
York he's Dr. Pepper he's a man went to fucking med school this ain't no fucking
Mr. Pibbles and Dr. Pibbs is like the knockoff version of Dr. Pepper why is
Dr. Pepper so big in Dallas I actually don't know that answer I probably should
know that answer it is it's it's not big in the south it was coax it's more pepsi
Southern yeah yeah but I think Dr. Pepper it might be a Texas company but it's
definitely a Southern company because I talk about it up here and people tell me
I'm garbage for that fucking Dr. Pepper have that at the holidays KFC Kevin
Clancy he mocks Dr. Pepper on the rest trash and some of his take your trash
yeah buddy that's true fucking ice-cold Dr. Pepper just hit so good it is it was
like a treat for us mind we wouldn't have it but if we were somewhere and like
you know and like my brother ordered a Dr. Pepper if you need a Dr. Pepper you
can come down to Ron Smith's garage I love that a guy who makes some money is
into sweets candy Dr. Pepper oh yeah sounds like my kind of guy oh yeah
Ron Smith is a special one what was the name of the grocery store that your
mother went to or your dad went to when you were growing up Kroger I think that
sounds harsh but I think that's pretty average real it's a classy one yeah but
it's not like H.E.B. H.E.B. is what's a I've never even heard of that always kids
checking the boxes I'm trying that right now Kroger Dr. Pepper I'm trying to think
of what Kroger would be compared to up here like it's not a whole foods it's
the kind of like the next step down yeah you know New York's talk New York's
very good you got to get into suburbs to really get a good look it's like
Wegmans oh Wegmans is the fucking top of the line Kroger is like Wegmans okay a
lot of limousines parked there you know they call it in Dallas the $30,000
millionaires and their limo is going to Kroger it's a little bit smaller of a
Wegmans type so H.E.B. is the big one down there that one's like all the meat
in the world but that's that's a true like everything's bigger in Texas but we
were we were a Kroger family Kroger you walk in you got the bakery there you got
the fresh flowers yep somebody making sushi yep yeah but not all but not all
the time sure not all the time you know sometimes it was had been sitting there
all day but we would still get it it was there the tuna is a little bit brown yeah
yeah I love I love supermarket tuna I don't know why I think you like a lot
but yeah Kroger it does sound harsh it's not as harsh as it sounds okay all
right I like it coming up class so I really yeah what Kroger Dr. Pepper
garage fridge Washington Lane come on I didn't know that a refrigerator in your
garage was classy well it's I mean it's a must it is actually we've gone over
this a couple times it is the epitome it's like it is trash thinking right it's
because a lot of times it's rarely ever you guys actually might have that was
doing all right really when usually it's a hand usually it's a hand me down oh it
was the old refrigerator yeah it was my dad's bachelor refrigerator yeah that's
the track mentality of going well this is big and expensive I can't throw this
out plug it in in the garage oh yeah it was a it was the color of that notepad it
was like but yes it was it was the bachelor refrigerator but we still we
do have a newer one there now okay but as long as it's stocked with sodas
caprisons beers and stuff like that that's when you know it's it that's
garbage but it's also classy does that make sense absolutely I always had his
beer in there well actually I got caught with a 30 pack of keystone light in
high school which is absolute garbage that's all that's all we could afford you
know without asking our parents because my parents were not on board with buying
me beer my dad found it in the in my car and instead of telling me that he did
it he just put it in the fridge knowing fully well that I would know he did not
buy fucking keystone light so then I was grounded after that but that was his way
of telling me it's like I'm gonna put this in the fridge and when you go grab
your Dr. Pepper you're gonna see there's probably still keystone in there to
this day no no chance he drank that that's how trashy my who I was in college
or high school maybe and like drinking I'm from an Irish Catholic fucking family
a dirtbag so drinking was like you know they kind of just turn their head at 16
a little bit but I remember I put like a 30 pack or like I had some leftover beers
from the night before they were in the garage fridge and they were Milwaukee's
best and Natty Light and I came home like two days later I was sitting there
drinking Natty Light and I'm like what you bitch I'm like what and he had never
heard of it you know it's like you know he goes this stuff's pretty good and I'm
like you're a peeing I'm like what I'm like to dead we didn't even want to drink
that like that's all we could get our hands on and from then on he drank Natty
Light he just changed to drink Natty Light that's trash that is trash my uncle
got heavy in the keystone for some reason whenever we went to his house you'd
offer you one of those it'd be about maybe 55 60 degrees not even cold you're
trying to suck down a keystone and fucking keep conversation those cheap
beers got to be really cold if you want to or just or beer pong that's the
college but I mean get a 30 pack for like 999 you know Texas is cheap what
were the Smith family vacations like oh boy okay so every summer we went to a
place called South Padre Island which is at the bottom of Texas's beaches in
Texas are shitty sure super shitty gotcha this one is between Texas and
Mexico so it's the nicest one you're gonna get it's still not that nice but we
would go every summer when I was younger my grandma would come and we would say
for like a month my dad would go back and forth to work then we got older got
a little bit more expensive we'd go for a week one year we went to Maui and my
sister and I hated it because we couldn't boogie board we wanted to boogie board
now we were talking about track oh yeah so we can't do no body surfing I was in
seventh grade and she was in fourth grade so we were still in the we don't give a
shit how expensive yeah I don't care how nice the sunset is I want a fucking book
I want to fucking boogie board I want my dad to drag our tent down to the sand and
I want to sit in the sun all day so then we went back to South Padre for the
remaining time of me being in high school that was our big our big vacation
every year it's pretty classy though but I mean if you look up South Padre Island
you how old were you when you got your passport I was a senior in high school
where'd you go that's pretty good to Cozumel for my senior trip yeah I had
never been out of the country until then okay my parents didn't want to take me
out the country they knew I was happy in South Padre Island you know boogie
board and I like it I just picture her like standing at the terminal to get on
the plane with her boogie board I mean like you miss you're gonna have to check
this you know we would have to have the thing on the top of the car you know what
are those things called the bubble yeah no the the thing that like the trunk or
they were like kangaroo it was an animal wasn't it it was a kangaroo or
something yes we my dad would strap that on top of the car for our boogie
load up the Wolverine what are you doing you got a couple of bucks you're
doing the bubble on the hood oh yeah we were we had to have the boogie boards
we had to have the lawn chairs we'd have the whole thing and every year we
would pack that well I would not my dad would pack that shit up and we would go
to South Padre Island the bubbles the bubbles in the bike rack on the back
seeing a family on vacation that one bike wheels just spinning real slow you're
waiting for it to fall off and fucking kill you yeah we had the bubble at one
point on a fucking Plymouth Voyager with wood panel and I remember it was in
the you're living there dude it grew up in the I mean we kept it in behind the
house like outside and filled up with water it was like a pond I'm like mom
what are we I was like seven being like yo putz clean this the fuck that's
crime for a business yeah tadpoles and shit yeah no mr. Smith would hang it
above the cars in the garage so we really stored it classy it doesn't look
classy when you're riding down that is if you got a good garage storage like the
stuff like that smells like wood in there a little bit he's got a little
little tool tool bench that's what I was like super organized still super
organized it's still a fucking garage how many car garage are we talking about
you and you could fit two cars yes yes shout out to mr. Smith that's a
fucking proper way to do it and he had a tube but could only fit the one that's
my most family but my dad my mom such a shit driver the tennis ball tennis ball
come on yeah I look back it was defined by taking the chicken fingers home
from the country like she is left and right she can walk in both worlds I
don't know what's going on I was driving to driving to school listening to Lil
Wayne with a red bandana and I was going to play the harp sometimes you know I
mean I'm an enigma over here were there any water sports vehicles owned by the
family no no jet skis nope but my next-door neighbors did so we would just
use theirs you would use theirs with them or you would borrow with them okay they
had a lake house you know about an hour out so any anytime spent on the river
and he any river house not until I got to college
oh yeah I floated the river a lot in college better than putting a cooler in
an inner tube and fucking jumping in college at a river though that's pretty
well yeah so it was about an hour or so away and there's a school called Texas
state people only go there to fucking party like you they can't get into Texas
they can't get into a and m that's where they're going but they have a river that
flows through the campus and they have like three hour floats six hour floats
nine hour floats you go you have tubes that are coolers with speakers on them
damn so then you strap yourselves to each other and you just get fucking
obliterated and that's your weekend dude what pair of let's that kid go to a
school that has a river running right I would call my parents and I'd say hey
we're gonna go to San Marcos this weekend my mom be like oh Jesus Christ
I hope you don't die like action Park South that's fucking yeah no we did we
never did it as kids now we did go to a water park called Schlitter bond which
is yeah yeah oh it's yeah yes it had the original park used river water oh as
the as thing and then my parents go over like you know we should probably get
some chlorine in the mix so what the fuck yeah I don't water yeah I don't it's
it's super cold logs down the river it was cold as shit I'll tell you that but
then we got older I mean I grew up around six flags over Texas and wet and
wild so we had season passes that's what it was it was six flags was Texas right
six flags all right I'll tell you that season passes that growing up I had a
funnel cake every time I went so much so that my first aim screen name was funnel
cakes four five six that's bad yeah that's bad you miss that you're too old
for this I don't even know what she's talking about my head to be polite yeah
screen names were instant messenger yeah it was a well yeah and then it was
used to be you had to log on to AOL and then they just separated the instant
messenger when that hit I mean it was fucking good night away messages all
day long son what is that you were using that in college to hook up with each
other weren't you guys back and forth yes yeah yeah I mean yeah exactly it was
like fucking you know you have it on your phone no no it was so you're at the
bar all night you're all drunk you want to hook up you have to go back to your
room get on the computer and see who's up I don't know I mean I don't know if it
was mainly like a booty it was more like that's how you created a connection with
something like okay he added me on aim or whatever and you talk hey what are you
doing tonight that kind of thing that you said in a way message that's kind of
vague about a guy or girl that you like like if you only suck my ass or something
imagine if we had away messages now I know it was like it was always like
song lyrics that were like it was song lyrics that would try to talk to the
person you were trying to hook up with or something you know by the time I got
to college aim was done I when I had AOL instant messenger I was like 7th
and 8th grade so it was like and then obviously throughout high school but you
would put the most emo shit on your away message like if you were sad a boy
broke your heart you just fired off Avril Lavigne you fired off Ashley Simpson
whatever you could yeah and then and then you started texting I mean yes am I
more than you bargained for I was at a fucking frat party doing keg
stains after a football game I don't know what you dorks were doing tell you
right now I probably had are you more than you bargained for with like every
other uppercase letter different colors and I just might as well put hey
Craig why the fuck don't you like pay attention oh my god that was big and
when I got up to fall out boy another big one was the lyrics to Grey's Anatomy
what was that what was the what I've never seen an episode either by that
do I know you I'm pulling things out of him no existed Toby do you remember that
it was like I was more than a friend or something I think it was the theme
song to Grey's Anatomy oh no it was I've never seen I was just told it was
Grey's Anatomy lost more than I lost it I had a I'll keep you my dirty little
secret a lot on my way I wasn't even fucking in high school what was your
first the first concert you ever went to backstreet boys standard that was the
first one that I went to on my own volition I don't know what my parents
took me to when I was younger but I went to the black and blue tour for black
for that was that was that they were hot I mean they still are mine was Jack
Wagner you probably want to know Jack Wagner is sounds like a bad he was a
soap opera star in the 80s and Mike my cousin loved them what it was he was on
general hospital in the 80s but what was he doing at a concert he was also a
singer he launched now he was the music career he was on Melrose Place for a
while if you have to describe his music career by he was on Melrose Place for a
while he was not a singer yeah just flat out not but my cousin wanted to go so
they drug me because my mom couldn't find anybody to watch me man it was me and
all my high school girl cousins when I was like 10 years old oh damn pretty
good show not bad I don't believe you at all not even for a little yeah I mean
how many people were it wasn't at a stadium and I was at like the Valley
Forge Convention Center something like that and I remember it was it was the
first time I cried in front of anybody like as I thought I was getting older I
was 10 years old and my cousin was obsessed with this guy so my mom they
were chasing his van through the parking lot and I started freaking out because
they were driving too fast because they wanted to find out what hotel he was
staying at wait you were changed what your mom was involved in chasing down a
soap opera star at the Valley Forge Convention Center they were trying to
catch up to his van so they knew what your family is trash I could see if it
was like Springsteen or the Backstreet Boys you're chasing some guy who's going
to a fucking holiday in I ruined the night because I started screaming
crying cuz I didn't want to get us killed playing it real cool fully what were
they gonna do with you if they caught up to him bring it I mean I don't know what
they were gonna do I'd like to know hey back here's a bag of pretzels why I go
bang this fucking guy from Melbourne hey kid wait in the lobby will you
here's a Shirley Temple mom's gonna go make a deal I'm sitting by the ice
machine with earmuffs on like the scene in Forrest Gump your mama sure does
care about your concert boy damn fat boy your mama sure can drive I'll tell you
that's too funny all right I got one that's kind of now a little bit or at
all I think we might have touched about it when we called on the show okay brush
your teeth in the shower absolutely not really no all right why do you brush
your teeth in the shower I mean I do it because I'm disgusting there you think
most people do it for time management it's only two minutes it's two minutes
and why my thing is if you're brushing your teeth you can't be doing anything
else that's not necessarily get another set of hands in there you do have a
next I use an electric toothbrush I don't want to be shocked you know what
you got on a carry a hot pink one okay how often do you change the head on that
thing well it's brand new so but not when I had the quip before because it was a
barstool sponsor I change it like every three to four months damn but that was
only because they said they would say you know what you get that free murder
they fucking gouge you on those now that I have a sonic air and I have to take
care of it myself that that'll probably don't like 25 bucks for two of them yeah
how often are you supposed to change them I don't know my girlfriend's just
stepped in and gotten involved yeah she just recently went and changed them
because yeah she looked at mine I had like the toothpaste I came home and
there was just a new toothbrush I was like okay yeah no taken at least she's
taking care of you guys I know for sure you know let's talk the Texas A&M years
where you said that's where it's gonna get a little dice that does get a little
dice lay it on us what do we need to know sorority no no so it's no I worked
for the football team okay so I was a I wanted to be a sports broadcaster since
I was a kid okay crazy what you wanted to do I'm always back by that that's so
cool oh thank you so I you know the in Home Alone 2 how Kevin McAllister
carries around the talk boy you know yeah I had one of those and I would just
talk about football into it all the time as a kid and then in eighth grade I said
you know they said in 15 years where are you gonna be and I said I would be an
ESPN sports broadcaster and I'd be married with kids I don't want fucking kids
and I don't want to get married so I failed that one but I was at ESPN at
that point so at some point I knew what I was doing but I wanted to go to A&M
because my dad went there I didn't even apply anywhere else like we went to
home games my entire life about putting it all on red yeah like I was like this
is what I'm doing so I went in the only way I could get into the sports world
because I wasn't good enough to play D-won sports was to go into like the
athletic training program but I also was not an athletic trainer like they
weren't letting me so they were like well you can fill Gatorade bottles if you
want I was like okay so you did that on the sidelines for Texas A&M I did for my
process it was amazing so my freshman year I did that and then through that I
met people in the athletic department that gave me a job doing like video
producing and your graphics on the big screen and by the time I graduated I was
doing like tailgate reports and I thought it was the coolest fucking thing ever
that's awesome but I mean it was like at that point I thought it was like the
end all be all for me but I I went to A&M solely because I loved it so much I
didn't really have a plan of how to become a sports broadcaster just kind of
fell in my lap and people along the way were like she's a fuck up like my
sophomore year I think I got so drunk I like passed out in the the office of the
production and and my boss at the time was like we're gonna give you one more
shot and then like years later she was like holy shit like you really yeah I
just got drunk took that one more shot yeah yeah yeah but no A&M Greek life is
not big at all so going into a sorority fraternity is not that big of a deal I'm
impressed working the Gatorade because I played Division 3 football and that
impressed the shit out of me the Gatorade setup we had was awesome I can't
imagine what you had at Texas A&M's popping a lot of oil money down there
yeah a lot of oil money I'm surprised it took you 38 minutes to bring up that you
played D3 football because of that without even sports related guests he
sneaks it in in the first three minutes which came up organically what it did
which school widen your university I have no idea where that is fair enough
thank you we're gonna cut that out and neither did he to be honest with you
sounds great though it was a good time I love the fact to that you thought you
know to see some people succeed in the field it's like you thought I when you
were doing the tailgate you know remotes or whatever this is the end all be all
and you were so happy to do it that's how you really wanted to do well same
thing with us I remember like being like you're gonna pay me a hundred bucks to
drive three hours to do comedy and you're gonna give me chicken fingers like
fucking hell yeah I want to do that you know it's the when people like quit when
they're having to do that it's like you didn't actually really want to do that
so yeah so that uh that was it was it was a grind but I mean I am basically when
I went to school I started to rebel against everything that my parents had
wanted me not to do so started sleeping around drinking a whole bunch and I just
I mean I was just blacked out for like three years sure that's college though I'm
now and that doesn't make you out yeah everybody do you still go back there for
like for like homecoming and shit like that no I do have I own a house there so
I do but college station is is super cheap I mean it's outside of Houston but
it's I the house that I lived in right after college because when I was working
for ESPN I was based out of college station okay like I flew all over the
country for games ice so I was like why not just stay here my boyfriend at the
time was there so I just I woke up one day in the house I was living in one of
my guy friends owned it I was like I fucking hate these decorations and I was
like I'm just gonna buy this house from you and so I bought it redid it and so I
still own it now but I never go back to do what the dude that was living there
told to beat it yeah we did it for six years and then I moved to Boston and he
didn't want to move with me and I was like well then good riddance wait that
was the guy that owned the house no that was a that was a guy friend that I buy
the house from but I rented out now but I never go back to him I don't usually go
back to Texas like the only time I go back is for Christmas gotcha not good
over Thanksgiving no but if not you would have went no so normally we're on
the road for college football so I don't ever go home for Thanksgiving and
normally we're working I don't Thanksgiving to me is not that big of a
deal okay yeah but no but I when I I told Kevin and John that I would not
tell you guys his story because I know what this is gonna do to my garbage
drinking ship it tweet the dates so well in one of those blackout years of A&M I
went to a Lil Wayne concert actually get ready to cut and print this Marty and
Ron takes it go grab a smoker you should go watch our nutcracker
ballet go check out the garage yeah go tune that harp will you so I think
it actually wasn't just Lil Wayne I think it was like all of the young money
young money cash money baby this is this was like one of the first concerts
that I went to that was outside in college what year is this I'm sorry 2008
probably 2008 Carter 3 has just dropped little ways my favorite rapper you want
to get married right now I was listening to the hot boys like behind my
parents back whenever like Lil Wayne became a thing so we went to this
concert and it because it was outside you know we smoked joints and I thought
it was like the coolest thing ever so I'd never been able to smoke in public
sure you can't you can't do that little Wayne concerts like water talk about
fast and loose with the fucking public intoxication I mean just and I think I
was one and my group of friends I was there's like I think 15 of us I was one
of two white kids that went and I'm blonde hair blue-eyed you know just trying
to fit in definitely not fitting in at all standing out like a sore thumb got
the band-aid on her face I mean I was I was doing everything I think I was
wearing like Wayne's face across my chest and everything but I got so high and I
was so happy I was like you know what we need to do we need to go back to
College Station and we need to get tattoos and I told my friends in the
car I said listen don't talk me out of this like I'm high I'm drunk do not
have a little Wayne tattoo almost almost so your mom ran in you know how to
play to hop yeah you dance ballet your whole life I so I went I went to the
tattoo parlor and I mean I was adamant to my friends like do not fucking stop
me from doing this I want this and I am not kidding you from my bra strap down
to like right where my jeans would be I had young money in cursive stenciled
down my rib cage ready to go ready to go I'm laying on the table holy shit I'm
laying on the table and like I said I was so happy and so high I was just like
this is the best decision I've ever made in my entire life and I'm laying there
and the tattoo artist just and again it's College Station Texas like they
don't give a shit they're only tattooing drunk college kids and I saw him
kind of turn to one of my girlfriends and turn back and I was like no one
fucking stop me and she just was like I'm sorry you're gonna hate me you can't
fucking get this tattoo you can't do it and I was no I'm getting this tattoo
and she's like Casey if you still want it tomorrow we won't wash off the
stencil we can come back and he was like I will do it tomorrow morning I woke up
the next day and bought her breakfast but I kept the stencil fuck yeah for a
little while but I mean I was so dead set on it and it was gigantic I mean all
the way down and so when I as soon as I told that story at bars were like yeah
you're fucking trash I also had my tongue pierced at the time too so I don't
who's that friend that doesn't help still friends with her yeah I am I am her
name is Blair it's pretty good shout out to Blair yeah no big ups I hate Blair you
know what so does everybody at Barstow in fact speaking of tattoos in Barstow
that would that you could be a completely different person if you got that
tattoo it would yes it would have been butterfly effect I mean just all the way
down in the Lazy River or something yeah I had the T-Mobile sidekick you know
I had the sidekick so trash I wanted it because Lil Wayne said call me when
you want bitch call me on my sidekick I was like I gotta get a fucking sidekick
for that exact reason yeah for sure and my buddies my buddies would all go look
at Kevin call me when you want call me on my sidekick and you get real mad I
don't know maybe you didn't I was an angry Texan I'd flip it around well I
had the slide my push down I had the one straight up I had like the second
one no that was the original and then the sleeker one that came out was the
slide the slide kick as we called it in the streets
I gotta check out this little Wayne's music gentlemen's all about yeah yeah the
kids seem to love them yeah cool modi you can check out more of a Steve
Miller band I got my what was your general hospital
center I got a big Jack Wagner tattoo your mom's all tatted up a little band I
actually got my got my tongue pierced because of Lil Wayne because of like me
like a lollipop I know trash I'm telling you super trash yeah I turned out fine
though I was working free SPN for a while so now when we talk about tattoos
all the time so actually right when I leave this studio with you two fine
fellas three fine fellas I'm going back to the bar still headquarters because
we are getting tattoos from an amateur tattoo artist tonight what what why I
don't know that's awesome so no that's trash is well I'm not gonna get a big
one I'm gonna get a little tiny smiley face but have you heard of the show we
do called lowering the bar yes yeah so Vibes is giving tattoos tonight oh my
god it's the worst idea ever John Fidelberg bought a tattoo gun on Amazon
I love that you're fucking that guy plays it fast yes so he he's my best friend
on the planet I fucking hate him he bought it for a hundred dollars off of
Amazon I like how he low ball until he went for the cheap one he said it was
the most expensive one which I just gotta make sure that's clean and stuff
like that so we do have a tattoo artist coming to make sure we don't kill each
other yeah he's not gonna touch us but and John is apparently getting a
cartoon on him they and all these people are getting big tattoos I think I don't
just want a little tiny smiley face but they were trying to convince me to get
the actual young money tattoo tonight I will not do it I will not do it are you
getting the smiley face I haven't you guys why don't you guys decide not on my
face I mean you guys I'm gonna make it as small as possible inside your lip see
I would say that normally too but I don't want an amateur doing that that
feels true but those go away I have the word shit tattooed on my body yeah and
ribs are great on the side cuz you cover it with a bra or whatever swimsuit
will cover it or you can show it off if you want it's the best place to do it
and why are you wearing bikinis I wouldn't have hired you if I knew you were
inked up like a fucking bacon you know that's a sin we want a classy
operation me and my buddies used to run a show called shithole and okay and my
buddy Kevin was like I'm gonna be the first one to get the tattoo and I got
hammered and my roommate did stick and poke tattoos so I did it just to fuck
yeah it was bad never gonna get a tattoo from a roommate that doesn't like you
I mean I'm we're doing it just at barcels headquarters which is disgusting
in the first place so but I mean that is super trashy that is but they wanted me
to get young money and I just I refuse you can get like a you can get like a
like a tiny like why I can't even do that I mean I feel like if I do that it's
like reversing like I'll go backwards I was 13 I would love to know sidekick
comes back out super long nails again I would love to know you yeah but just for
a little bit like I think for like a week because I couldn't do anything and I
play the harp you have to have short nails the young money this is crazy I
know I think you might be like the proper coin flip 5050 garbage glass I feel
like that I mean honestly I was hoping for that because if you were guys like
oh no you're totally garbage like my parents lied to me my entire life we did
dance in the nutcracker every single year I'm gonna start trying to make me
myself class here after my young money tattoo was it was it the nutcracker
yeah but that's your mom like the hip hop version it was it was the Dallas Fort
words the whole way the captain screwed remix of the nutcracker although that
kind of sounds pretty hot I actually dance for the the real ballet company
Dallas Fort Worth and my ballet instructors were from Russia they
dance in the Bolshoi Ballet so I danced in the nutcracker growing up every
Christmas is at the Bass Hall in Fort Worth you're like an undercover cop I
know who's in too deep I don't know who I don't know who I am they're gonna get
make me get a young money cash money tattoo you know and so many of these
stories were like buried deep deep within because when I was working in
network TV you can't say anything they're like yo we're gonna tattoo
his other face we need contact tomorrow yeah and we let Fidelberg know that the
most expensive tattoo gun on Amazon is 700 bucks
he's not even close for the Amazon deal of the day guarantee you he was so fucked up
he doesn't remember buying he is honestly like so I've been to his
family's house at one of their houses in Massachusetts I have no clue how he
turned out the way that's at least you can kind of see with me there's some
sure you know you still yeah a little bit of it left with my parents that's
nature versus nurture right there yeah all right I got I got two for now okay
right currently if we were go we were gonna go over to your apartment right
now and we asked for some water what would you give us would it be out of the
sink would it be a Brita a bottle what are we doing I would give you a bottle
of water because we are sponsored by body armor at Barstow sports so I keep
that stocked okay yeah that's pretty good cold cold pretty organized it has to
be okay I'm a little bit OCD when it comes to that nice I have a very tad
bit of obsessive compulsive disorder when you eat dinner to eat dinner at home at
a kitchen table or do you eat for on the couch in front of the TV depends on how
depressed I am at the time nice but I have a little breakfast bar that
sometimes I sit at but most of the time most of time I sit on my couch but I
have one of those like it's not a TV tray oh they are trash I did have a TV
tray growing up wait as kids TV well we would eat at the kitchen table unless my
parent you know we had babysitters over or if it was just my dad my mom was out
of town we had the TV trays those things TV oh yeah still food from the last
meal the meals where you have to like rip the plastic off the TV TV
dinners yeah oh yeah oh really yeah when my dad when my mom was out of town my
dad was living it up living it up breakfast for dinner and shit like that oh
yeah oh yeah whatever hot and we love the hot dogs with the cheese in the middle
the Oscar I was just talking about that that's Oscar Meyer cheese dog is the
epitome of delicious I had one in the last year and they still hold up
there fuck oh I've had a second episode of family ties yeah still okay two of
them in the microwave for the button in my mom's house is easy minute good night
see we I like to boil growing up which is pretty gross boiled I grilling them to
me I didn't like the charred sides I was like fuck that I now as an adult I like
things grilled but I wanted to boil those babies what do you think is the
trashiest way to cook a hot dog we've discussed that on the podcast I think
microwave right okay yeah you have to like wrap it up in a paper towel and I
know what I would just put them on paper plates yeah paper plate no no he
cooks them in the toaster oven like a psycho what the only way to cook a hot
dog you got a toaster oven and you got a spiralized it'll change your life I
don't even know how to do that I've had toaster ovens my whole entire life that
own a toaster oven you know there's one at Barstle though so I could try yeah
that's it but I'm just saying I've eaten 10,000 Oscar Meyer cheese dogs in my
life and I've made them next to the toaster oven never once has across my
mind to put it in how do you spiralize a fucking hot dog you take a you take a
knife any knife will work whatever you got and you just you just cut at an
angle not not so deep that you split it but just you just and you spin the dog
and then when it cooks it kind of expands a little bit so the you get the
inside crispy and the outside crispy it's unbelievable total game changer it's
the only way to go that seems like a waste of time I'll be in the microwave yeah
I'll be done in a minute easy minute that's it that's how you make a snack
of me all right and then I got one more if you could well if you're going out
you're gonna buy a chocolate bar what kind of chocolate bar are you buying are
you going high-end you going low what is it I like dark chocolate like as dark as
you can possibly get like 90 90 I like the whole foods brands like I don't
really necessarily have a brand I'm for sure going to buy I'm not a huge candy
person okay so don't take after the old man I see no no my like when so we used
to pretend like we were gonna give things up for went we weren't Catholic I
don't know what I don't but my dad would always give up soda and candy and I'd
have to give up like cheese hot dogs and shit just any dark chocolate really but
like I don't have a specific is Whole Foods your primary supermarket now Trader
Joe's Trader Joe I like it again she's right there in the middle it's kind of
trashy but it's awesome too like Justin's peanut butter cups the dark
delicious but Trader Joe's has like the little miniature ones that come in the
tub Trader Joe's I said they kill it on all fronts because they have shit they
have pre-made stuff that's not really pre-made but they do the thinking for you
right exactly what are you when they're marketing we went to the one at
Columbus Circle fucking right before Thanksgiving all hooked up and it's
cheap it's nuts it's so fucking cheap but you go to like a Dagestino's in the
city you're paying $10 for a bunch of cereal they get you cut it's like 14 bucks
for pasta that way yeah no coming and going no Trader Joe's is my go-to I
will actually go out of my way to go to a Trader Joe's even you know if I could
just go to like a local store for something I'm like no I'm going to
Trader Joe's okay all right let me ask you this do you sleep now with a fan
directly on you yes you do what kind of fan one of those but it's across the
room though that's not okay it's not on your face no no no so it's directly
across from it's one of those big box fans now not over the winter fan no not a
box the big silver ones the circular silver ones like the stand-up ones no
it's not a Dyson or anything no no it's down on the ground but it's like the big
one I really have one of those so the only reason I have one of those is
because so I live in a co-op and the guy who owns my apartment last year you
remember when there was the blackout and like everything went to shit sure my
air conditioning went out and he lives in France and so instead of having like
somebody come fix my air conditioning was like well there's a blackout people
are backed out here's this fucking fan and I was like are you serious I went
stayed with one of my friends but then I realized that it actually puts out a
nice amount of air fans not too shabby not too shabby so I have it across my
bedroom but I only do that during the summer and the winter I just sleep with
the window open who are you you are a mystery trashy fan lives in a co-op owned
by a guy who lives in France I don't know I don't know what to do with that 24
hour doorman to get a pool rooftop the whole thing you got to do it but I will
say the fan looks nice though it's not a shitty one uh-huh it's like one that you
know if it's the one I'm thinking of it's like something they use for like
high school productions to like make the snow go or something like that it's a
regular fan but it has like a little a little hinge on it did it like sit on the
floor yeah but it's big and it's like silver yeah but it's metal I used to
have one made by Atlantic Breeze I mean that's what it was I don't know what
brand it is I didn't bring that with me though that that was that was gifted by
my owner of my my apartment but yeah it was kind of a piece of shit moved I
mean it was like 70 or it was like a like last July it was really really
fucking hot for a while that was right when it happened and he just was like
no I'm not gonna fix it for a little bit but I do have I do have a fan though
so huh what about the pillow situation how many pillows are you rocking when you
sleep on my bed I have seven pillows okay but I sleep with only four on the
bed okay I have I have two decorative pillow or two you know that the front
cover pillows I don't know what they're called was and then a decorative pillow I
take those off at night before I go to bed what's the sleeping positioning with
the pillows how many behind your head two behind my head and then I like to
like maybe hug one if I'm sleeping by myself or what about one one between your
legs no I like to do the the comforter between my legs yeah yeah so just kind of
you know twist around I having sheets that are too tight not yeah it's like
give me the fuck yeah never but I I do have
Buffy pillows if that helps at all I don't know if you guys know that's pretty
nice Buffy it's like they're made by like eucalyptus and instead of like cotton
I heard about your Instagram will have it yeah my fucking wife was telling me
yeah I actually I do highly recommend no free ads but they I have my entire bed my
comforter everything is them stunning down comforter yes duvet yes do you make
your bed every day every single morning it's the first thing you're very put
together you're very calculated it's very you go into my apartment and it's a
sign that my depression and anxiety is out of control if my bed is not made and
if my suitcase is not unpacked that is something I have to do like as soon as I
get home I could be gone for two months I have to unpack hmm and then I have to
I mean that's the first thing that I do when I get up and I have a gravity blanket
to because you know the anxiety so I even fold that up nicely on how how heavy
15 pounds but I don't like it on my legs like I said I don't like when my legs
are restricted so I place it all right on my chest unless I have a male friend
over then I'm not sleeping with a genitalia wait gravity blanket does what
makes you feel like you're getting a hug no it's the weighted blanket yeah I like
it on my legs because I get crazy legs at night it's all the anxiety comes out
my legs I slept with it last night I told my wife I said where's the heavy
John I gotta I got the crazy do you share one with her it's hers but she
doesn't always use it you're not both underneath it no no it would just be
one why is that we have the 30 pound we got the heavy we're talking heavy bike
we got the 30 pound and I fold it in half and then I put it on top so it's all
on top of me that's what I need to feel like they're burying me that's the only
way I can get some shut I real real kid over yeah drown me in blanket too much
coffee do you do you still booze now oh yeah when was the last time you did a
keg stand this summer see there we go this summer I mean I mentioned it
earlier and the only reason I keep bringing him up is because you guys
know how trash is John is my best friend so there you go so I do party with him
quite often but we did we did keg stands and mushrooms over the summer one
I'm a huge beer pong fan love a good love a good game of beer pong so I get in
that at any point we used to do keg stands so that the house that I have in
college station all of my friends from college we do a reunion and I have a
pool in the backyard and we would do keg stand like bull riding yeah you know we
would it would empty it out throw it in there and see who could stand on the
keg stand yeah try to ride it try to ride it
underwater kegs danger floating around yeah I'm too busy taking that shit back
trying to get that no okay definitely a keg stand this summer yeah I'm
fantastic at it by the way this is a real this is a real niche one okay you
said beer big beer pong big beer pong three cups left what's your rack are you
going diamond yeah triangle yeah I'm a triangle man trash that's stop light
but bozo's all glass no bozo but it's all you do the triangle and if you have
four left I will do the diamond but I always wait to get to the three yes I
agree also to a new thing that I was playing with like my cousins who are
like younger like significantly younger they're probably like early 20s over the
summer and they do the reverse truck and upside down angle what so the the one
is it's two in the front and one in the back and I'm like do like they're giving
it trying to talk I don't know like reverse triangle like what is this the
nexus of the universe and the diamond also diamond pure trash you got to go
rhombus on its side bozo that's also like a new money bullshit get out of here
we're playing fucking street rules with one rewreck and you go triangle hit the
fucking brick can you can you finger and blow you can blow a family show we do
girls can blow bounce or obviously swat no we don't you guys talk about you
know that's a sexist thing you know no gold ending you guys are out of your
fucking mind no you could you could only you could only blow though once the ball
was spinning like you can't blow it before you know you got to just just a
tip for a second yeah no we play jail you know jailhouse rules yeah fucking dude
if you're taking a fucking stoplight get out of here Toby you're fired that's
fucking walking papers I'm never gonna look at you this I guarantee you could
beat his ass in beer let's go solo cups yeah oh damn but yes I know good good
game of good game of here go do some cake as long as it's natty light I don't
like to go he's up at the office right now probably drunk as shit waiting for
his tattoo all right we're not supposed to get fucking tattoos while you're drunk
by the way cuz they're bloods they're bloods then yeah well he does a lot of
things that are bad for his body couple more questions here and let you get out
of here okay kippy you want to go yeah I got one you're at your local mall it's
dinnertime you know maybe not New York but you know in you know a proper
suburban mall okay you're at the court court talking food it's dinnertime
where you going is there a chick-fil-a there is there's whatever you want in a
proper you know chick-fil-a love a good chick-fil-a either that or the
Chinese food that gives out the free orange yeah love it love that but I if I
can get chick-fil-a in a situation like that that's I'm gonna do that nine out
of ten do you go to the chick-fil-a in New York ever no if we get it ordered to
the office I'll eat it but it's just not I'm not gonna go out of my way for it
doesn't taste the same as it does in the south I yeah I don't know if they
ordered lunch for you's over there no sometimes oh every once in a while we
do get a lot of free pizza because of Dave obviously like although the one bite
you know a lot of free pizza wait you got to start doing pizzas or something
we got to get some fucking free from some free Zazz coming in that was all I
ever wanted to in the entertainment business work at a place where they
where they got your lunch that is pretty classic it's real class we do have like
a great snack bar for free yeah like bagels and muffins and stuff no like
fucking Cinnabon's and what yeah we got a lot lots of chips and really all the
trash and now you're speaking a big man's line we're talking pizza give me
I don't know you're talking about beer pong red lights or whatever now we're
talking fucking Cinnabon baby yeah European we got it we have all that the
trashy snacks at bar so they're gone as soon as they're put out a bunch of
savages but yeah yeah definitely have you ever operated a t-shirt gun no but
you know what I want but that would be occupational so true she wouldn't be just
doing it with her friends I have shot actual guns yeah really yeah you know
Ron keeps a piece down at the house yeah his so his thing was he was always
like if somebody breaks into my house I can't save my wife and two daughters if
I don't have it I know they got a little nickel on me yeah I have no clue where the
gun in the house is I still to this day do not but my grandfather used to take
us out and shoot on the range I've never done hunting or anything like that but
my grandfather used to take us out so we wouldn't be scared of them so we did
ever come across him now I live on the East Coast and I'm a little bit I feel a
little bit differently about that but yeah you grew up that way I get it no
t-shirt guns I don't know where the fuck I would have shot a t-shirt gun my last
shot I got nothing else anything in your house right now say live laugh love no
no chotchkes no beanbag chair no you have a rumba no roo whiffer Roomba yes
but I don't I don't use it very often because somebody cleans my apartment
gonna ask you got a cleaning you got a cleaning service and his name is Angel
and he's great wow yeah hmm that's pretty good I'm gonna say I'm done and
I'm gonna say you're 100% classy that's what I'm so honored I'm not saying
there's not blemishes but we all we all have a past so you're not running for
Congress or anything like that so the young money tattoo story didn't didn't
push me over you're close I didn't get it you know you have to thank for that
Blair Blair yeah I was she be in the wedding party if you got married no she
would definitely be invited though but I don't want to get married ever okay we
haven't stayed in contact as much I mean we still are friends but you're like
Vietnam buddies yeah you know if we were around each other we would relive the
old times maybe do a cake stand or something definitely probably a drink a
lot of hypnotic we love to honey and hypnotic I like to recant my statement
but that was you're too nice that was in 2009 you say she's trash I'm saying
she's got an angel cleaning service I'm saying I'm saying she did a cake stand
within the calendar year come on but it was on vacation it doesn't matter I was
in Mexico I haven't done a cake stand in a calendar year that's and I'm garbage
what are you 50-50 I'm tired this is our first 50-50 split down the middle trash
class I'll take that I don't I don't think we'll ever see one so sharply down
them do she take you're right you're right I'm going 50-50 I'm sorry chicken
fingers from the country yeah hypnotic I'm sorry I can't I mean I had my
give me my Saratoga water I had my tongue pierced four times in college but I
played weddings with that tongue piercing you know in my tongue on the heart on
it done four times because I kept taking it out for different reasons and I was
like I want it done again hold me one of the reasons I had a boyfriend that was
like and take that out my mom caught me one time another time it was a daring
close-up too quick but I would take the little spacer and put it in and then go
play the harp at weddings and I in like a nice ball gown so I mean I really truly
right well yeah he's a fucking loser doesn't matter doesn't I'll take a
you know I'll take 50 50 I don't think I mean this is crazy it was each it was a
fucking coin flip it was a flip flop I felt like I was playing ping-pong over
here you've lived the life I'll tell you that thank you I appreciate that but like
I said I'm at barcel now so if you guys talk to me in like a year or so I bet
that the trashiness is coming back I had to hide it for her face tattoo post
Malone next time I don't smoke cigarettes but I'll smoke a cigarette she's
Paul or something like that right damn I love it perfect very funny Casey Smith
ladies and gentlemen as only want the folks out there to know other than your
shows and social media yeah I'm on a million shows at bar so you just thank
you so much my social media my parents named me all fucked up too it's Casey
k a y c e I was gonna mention that that's also points to which on which way
Casey's nobody's who suppose Casey like that I've never nobody but I think it's
my last name is Smith they wanted to spice it up Casey Casey Lee Smith leigh
gh too super southern yeah definitely 50 maybe 60 40
trash come on your names Casey Lee and it's all spelled weird what do you want
from me we got to run on the show here I know I mean there's fans we got a we
gotta run but if you say it with a southern accent it's like Casey Lee
get all trashy yeah because you can also say hey Casey Lee
it's a fucking diet soda go get me to dr. Pepper he sold her harp again
god damn it uses her heart to cut cheese no my parents don't have accents it
also it does just sound normal but yeah on social Casey Smith k a y c e Smith
awesome so funny buddy thank you so much so much fun what do you got the
as always please make sure you rate you subscribe on iTunes full video
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all social media thanks a lot will this be up before December 10th oh yeah then
gang please come out and see uncle hank and kippy co-headline soul Joel's
comedy out there in Royersford PA we have our links up in our bios and come
see us we're gonna have a great time yeah we love you we'll see you next week
please peace