Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Krystyna Hutchinson: Lottery Garbage

Episode Date: April 23, 2020

Comedian & podcaster Krystyna Hutchinson is put to the test. Krystyna shares her love for scratch off lottery ticket, Wawa, and all things garbage. We did not see this coming.  You know Krystyna Hutchinson from Guys We F****d Podcast and touring the country performing stand up comedy. 

Welcome to another exciting edition of are you garbage the show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash now here are your hosts Kevin Ryan and H Foley hey everybody out there welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast this is are you garbage I am your host H Foley coming at you from beautiful Astoria Queens where the bodies are stacking high folks not gonna lie to you a little dicey in the neighborhood this time of the year my co-host coming to you from an undisclosed location somewhere in the southern realm of New Jersey ladies and gentlemen Kevin James

Ryan hey what's up King of the Boardwalk down here baby got it all to myself Ferris wheel all day long funnel cake Boulevard sitting pretty down there yeah just doing loops on the on the roller coasters you know I'm happy to be here guys thanks so much for tuning in as as always please make sure you rate review subscribe on iTunes full video available on YouTube Spotify all that good stuff we appreciate the support so far thank you kippy and gang we got a very special guest today we got a get we got a celebrity in the building the originator of podcasting in New York I'll say it's kids a trendsetter guys we

fuck podcast she's also a best-selling author and she's a brand new project out right now that you can check out called Dwell ladies and gentlemen you know where you love her Christina Hutchinson everybody hello what an intro thank you thanks so much buddy I know my pleasure we appreciate having you here and you got your little buddy Kevin next to you a little puppy doggy yeah well Kevin Kevin says hi yeah I just wanted to bring the dog out so I can talk baby talk and annoy Kevin because my my Kevin hates tonight the odd look at that little belly it says I'm in a three-person zoom and I'm not even the cutest Kevin that is

that is a tough fucking break right there oh man if that's not you know reminiscent of childhood I don't know what is word where does the name Kevin come from because sometimes that could be a garbage trait why people name their dogs and what they name their dogs right so holy I just noticed he shit in the corner that's good classic Kevin we'll get that later don't worry about that I've obsessed with dogs that have human names I think it's really funny and I wanted I've wanted a dog for a long time and Kevin was always a potential name his middle name is McAllister and it's last in his Hutchinson so I didn't realize

that somebody pointed out we have the same initials but yeah I think Kevin McAllister from home alone gotcha fair enough it's a good one yeah and when I talk to him it just feels like somebody else is in the room so that's crazy lady stuff I like yeah too funny well thank you so much for doing the show we know a little bit about each other as far as like you kind of I think grew up near where Kevin and I are from yeah yeah I'm from box yeah box so yeah not too far from Doylestown I know D town quite well so you go to a central Bucks high school I went to Council Rock oh I went to North Penn all right fair enough

here football our football team was a but you know they were good I guess but they were mean I don't know was Council Rock or CV West or something when I was in high school they were both garbage back then man those kids I remember one of them one of the ones up by you I don't even know I just remember I'm like those guys look like farmers like they would like show up in like jeans and and flannels and shit like when that wasn't in style I'm like these guys look like construction workers they're gonna fuck us up yeah it's my school district was huge we had 1100 people in a graduating class so it was it had it

had chunks of farmer kids chunks of like really rich kids and giant mansion houses and then the pores I live in like a little two bedroom condo with my mom so I never let anybody know that until I graduated I thought you went to and this is inside baseball so we apologize people from the Delaware Valley area but I always thought you grew up in Hatborough wasn't wasn't there a hat borough connection yeah I was near Hatborough Hatborough was a neighboring town yeah I think that girl was Penn Dale and they went to our high school I think half or I went to North Penn but I I went to high school at North Penn and

I grew up grew up born in Doha's town but like had my formative years in Virginia and then moved to where did I move to Lansdale so that's kind of you know so that's why you went to North Penn because you live in Lansdale mm-hmm all right so I was literally next door in Bluebell yeah oh shit yeah so I was a Hicken oh yeah did you want to live up Catholic if we had a little scratch but then happen well that's good I'm new Monco Montgomery County Community College buddy I took a couple of classes and I'm on the honor roll yes why did you take classes there too no but

fully as a cafeteria named after all that the East Wing but no like what you're saying is yeah all those towns out there they got like more rural as they got away from the city but you like kids from Soderton were the ones that I was like what are these guys made a fucking corn what they were like hillbillies well it was like you got further out so it was more and more rural like so like chunks of that were not developed at all and chunks were like yeah we raise livestock at times throughout the half girl is the is a meat that a meat farm yeah there's a lot of meat up in

that way which is always a weird thing that way a lot of smell of slaughtered animals by the most factories bring upbringing so I love this we're all in the same circle so I'm saying right off the bat hutch you got to be garbage I got a I got a wallah tattoo stop the show good night garbage baby that is that is PA trash if I've ever seen it a fucking wallah tattoo that's a first how do you feel about Rita's water ice oh what are they did a wallah get a hoagie it a wallah hoagie's a water ice forget about it you can't not be from Philly and not be garbage I don't know anybody doesn't have I was just a Philly trash is

my favorite type of person it really is I love it I love all of my uncles they're all like plumber they're all construction workers and one like I have my brother who like thinks he's not garbage but I'm like dude you it's like he went to he went to private school but I'm like dude come on you're fucking trash you're throwing for you can't he went to private pool and you didn't yeah yes and that weird he went to a pen charter which is like a really nice school I don't know I could have yeah I think I don't know it was really I didn't know anybody went to public I grew up going to public school he did he had he

jumped around a little bit whatever yeah I just all my friends I had I was like I don't want to leave my fucking friends and go make new friends that's a weird thing that's a garbage move to I always thought that was strange when two siblings didn't go to the same school yeah it's usually behavioral reasons so I got kicked out or called yeah or something you know what it that's why one's a comedian and one's a what does he do what is he's a business owner like yeah he's like yeah he does he does well for himself oh that's good yeah private school education pays off you know what I mean yeah I'll just say

maybe regretting your my counselor rocks out fucking don't diploma I got Christina did you have brothers and sisters going up or was it just you and your mom I have an older brother he's a me and my parents my parents they split up for three years but they other than that they're still together they're one of the few really awesome yeah split up and got back together that's fucking crazy what did they get divorced that is fucking crazy I love that they never got officially divorced they separated when I was 10 or 11 and that's why I moved from Chesapeake Virginia because my dad's in the Navy so

we were stationed stationed there and I moved with my mom to Pennsylvania because that's where I was born to went back there and then my dad would send my mom books of poetry which was very unlink him and I was like he's trying real hard and then they got back together and they're doing great and did he move up to he obviously moved up to Philly with you guys exactly yeah he moved back up to Philly and now they live in Ocean City New Jersey so they're that's I'm like I'm fine I was just in Ocean City the other day I'm in Wildwood right now my mom joined my mom joined a Facebook group about whether or not they should

open the boardwalks or close them in Ocean City specifically and she calls me every day with like the current drama like she's like get these outsiders out of here we don't want them here boardwalks should be for permanent residents I'm like all right mom yeah I know so yeah so for the listener there's these like small shore towns in Jersey that everybody from all Philly trash it's I don't you don't even have to have money you don't even have to have money like you can anybody it's like anybody can buy a house anywhere from plumbers to doctors like you don't need that much you can buy these you can buy a

shore house in these little towns so they're all second homeowners and now so when the corona hit that's what I did I'm like I'm getting the fuck out of New York like I've been down here for three weeks just hanging out but everybody that lives here hates the shit out of us like I like reverse my car in so they can't see my my Pennsylvania license plate and stuff and they don't want any outsiders here yeah cuz there's like there's maybe 12 permanent residents in Ocean City I mean that's exaggerate but like it's not a lot my parents are one of those permanent residents and she's pissed but I'm like mom if this was your

second home you'd be there so you know they wanted so the locals want to keep the boardwalks closed but the people that are that are second homes that are down there and stuck down there they're like fuck it we got the kids get fucking Gilliam's water peer fucking open so we can hit shotgun falls exactly the locals want to keep the beaches open just for the locals yeah dude it's a guy yeah it's okay you can't she's like well they should just ask to see our paperwork I'm like mom that's not she wants to set up customs at the fucking at the bridge at that's so funny oh my god that's good stuff all right well let's give it some

questions here so just so I have a picture and I know what I'm dealing with as far as like high school is concerned you grew up in North Penn School district in southeastern Pennsylvania correct all right all right just so I have an idea and your brother didn't really grow up with it because he was eight years older you when you were when you were born he was eight yeah okay all right just I'm going I mean we're but you're we're cuffing the same cloth you're bucks County trash I got you thank for it hell yeah I got you fucking peg for it I love it I love it cuz I remember I mean we were garbage in

Bluebell but we used to I used to look at like North Penn and like those schools that were out further like like yeah he's fucking trashy farmer kill like methactin oh my god I don't even know what that is but it sounds bad yeah a lot breeding out there my mom and I used to baby my mom used to babysit she's to do all these odd jobs when she was separated from my dad she was clean houses and babysit and we babysat this family lived in Bluebell and they lived in the oh my god their house was gorgeous there was neighborhood that was like giant houses and so I for me Bluebell was always really fancy yeah but here's

the thing well you haven't you haven't been through the Foley residents I'll pay you that much it ain't that fancy there was a part of our see it's the same thing you would you had said a couple minutes ago that like it's for some reason our area that whole entire area down there is such a mix of like blue collar neighborhoods that were there from like the 50s like the original neighborhoods that were built in there and then you have these neighborhoods that got put up in the 80s and the 90s that like have all the McMansions and stuff like that and then there's even another fucking tier like the guy that

owns US healthcare used to live like right in Bluebell he had like mansions and if you start going out towards like where a Germantown Academy is oh it's like it's like real actual wealth so it's like all fucking mixed in and it's so weird we're we're in the the lower tier yeah it's fun to be in the poor part of your town yeah I'm not bad though I was a I was a specific one in the sense that like my dad got some money at like I mean we grew up they grew up poor but like he got some money in the 90s and build a McMansion and then we couldn't afford it like three years later so so we were still in it but it was just like

there wasn't money like we have like an unfinished shed and like you know it was I would have to cut the grass which was fine but like it would just be like you know like lawn companies cutting everybody else's grass it was so it was just like all like South American guys and then me like on it's come over you have no furniture just a refrigerator box you know you're still trying to keep it up acting fancy with a polo shirt on yes the furniture is on my way when we first got down to Philly we had it we moved into like a townhouse community oh yeah right and like it was great like when I look back on it now it was awesome

but for some reason all the kids like that I was friends with we all had that stigma that we were living in in a townhouse community and like the other kids all at houses yeah my one buddy got a lot of man he used to say every couple of months that his family was moving out it was like a dog at the SPCA it was like a dog at the SPC and he's kept saying I know they're like kids at the adoption age like today's gonna be the day we're moving out man I remember one time we rode bikes to like one of the McMansion neighborhoods and he was showing us a house saying like I think that's the one my mom bought

living there tonight man that's heartbreaking that's a deep wound that trying to get out baby like a Bruce Springsteen song nah he's townhouse people throw and throw like if that same amount of space was in New York to be like millions of dollars houses are really they have a they have they build a task development by Montgomery Mall and it was just like divorce dads and stuff and we used to make fun of the kids who live in townhouses but it was a lot of property it was a big home sure but because it was connected to other homes we're like you're poor I know the I know the exact townhouse community you're

talking about yeah yeah I know exactly what you're talking about well when my parents got to my parents got divorced we moved like my dad moved we moved out of like the you know that McMansion or whatever and into like not even like in a proper apartment like over by the Chamonix mall which was like shitty mall apartments in the suburbs man there was only like nine of them apartments in the suburbs are tough luck as a guy we he opened the door and I was like what is this I'm like take me back to mom's house no go back there tell her you're sorry I don't know get some roses get whatever the fuck you gotta do but

we're out of here yeah right some fucking but yeah that's funny man cheese what does your dad do in the Navy just as the side he was a chief he was a officer he's an E8 which is like I guess the highest rank you can get without a college degree he was drafted when he was 18 a week before he got his college acceptance letter and so if that had been reversed he wouldn't have had to served yeah he stated and what did he actually do in the Navy do you know he repaired he worked on the aircraft carriers repaired jet planes and okay he was stationed he went to China a lot he went to Japan and worked on the US

bases there the US Navy bases and so he was a non yeah yeah he didn't he wasn't like front lines or anything he was a mechanic but then he became chief I don't really know what you do I don't know a lot of people it's funny like I didn't really ask my dad like what specifically that's good though you know my coincidentally why I'm asking my dad retired Chief Petty Officer United States Navy oh shit in 26 years served in NAMM and the last place he was stationed was willow Grove airbase oh my dad my dad was in willow Grove when I was born it was tell me dad wait wait what's your idea this what's your dad

name Terry Foley Terry Foley does anybody know my dad sorry the only does he owe any you guys money what was your hippie dad doing during the war hippie huh smoking grass and hanging out probably my dad used to get perms too I just saw a picture my dad used to get perms my dad I mean my I don't know if men did my dad did for sure he loved it like the big fucking he had a big thing I don't know an afro I think he used to do a lot of narcotics back in the day nice between you and the lamppost I want to get one now I want to get a perm now and I had a perm when I was a kid because all my I had a perm I was a little fat

nine-year-old kid playing soccer and I had this huge I had like Jackie Moon I had this I had this killer dude chemically curled with a perm I got my mom chemically curled my hair with a perm because all my older cousins they all were tall and they all had curly hair and the reason that I did it this is a garbage I am hopefully my father so it's not you know the worst thing that can happen to somebody it's too funny yeah just recently like so yeah wait what happened I missed it I got it my mom was adopted when so I got a 23 meet kids for my parents one Christmas and then I did it I had a girl message me

saying she was my half sister and I asked my mom about it and that's when I found out I was a sperm donor baby yeah dad's not my biological father but you know I wish I was related to him he was very handsome man and good built and good you know but you know but my brother always the male man's baby my whole life because I don't look like anybody I'm like yo DJ you weren't wrong did he know he had no idea oh man he's got to feel like shit dude same thing happened to same thing happened to my mom some of somebody she did I told them I was the first of all that 23 and me stuff all that stuff I think it's

garbage well it can only tell you bad news it's like leave it it's never like holy shit you got a million dollars waiting for you so you're susceptible to your parents like your parents go on have fun yeah yeah everybody just does it just to be trying to be bougie and shit like that but my my brother my mom gave each other one for Christmas like two years ago and I was like I don't do it bad idea next thing you know six months later my mom's getting an email hey I think we're I think you're my half sister find out find out maybe my grandfather isn't really my grandfather and that my grandma was fucking stepping

out on the town nice I get an email once a month from 23 me it's like you have between 9 and 12 new DNA relatives because a bunch of them were sperm donor babies but one of them was actually raised by the man who donated the sperm but every yeah every every month or so I'll get brand new half brothers and half sisters that's crazy I have so what I don't think I have no desire to do that my mom I'm from a huge family my mom's one of nine well so I have 32 first cousins on the one side this guy's garbage enough yeah so it's like I'm like I have I have cousins that I know that I'm like that I don't need to I

don't talk to so yeah I don't need to add any more people to that yeah I don't have I thought I had a very small family but now I have now all right let's get into the game here you're giving a lot away but I love it Kippy you want to lead off with some questions I got one because we talked about it where you brought it up briefly when was it last time you're at a water park hmm oh I love water park so trashy but so fun Gillian Gillian's right on the boardwalk in Ocean City baby yes that's right the last time I was at a water park was probably about a year ago the mall that's not that long ago to be honest

with you oh yeah I wish it was less I love water I fucking love water park actually I think the last water park we went to is at Six Flags oh that's a tough one dude a Six Flags water park is a tough water park it was a day of thunderstorms and so no one was out and so we kind of had the water park to ourselves it's really nice I thought it's the best water park they're fun but they oh man they can be a bit trashy from time to time amusement parks are trashy and garbage but if you catch like great if you get you can get in great adventure on an off day and there's nobody in there it's totally fucking

worth it yep rollercoasters are fucking kick-ass yeah go with someone in a wheelchair or go on Memorial Day not wait in a line it's true Kip I this has to be throwing up did you ever spend time hanging out in the parking lot of a 7-11 or a gas station oh my god yeah yeah yeah I still hang out in parking lots of wawa did you drive to school we want what did you drive to school did you drive the North Penn yep senior year I did smoking cigarettes I didn't touch cigarettes or weed until after I graduated high school did you play sports huh did you play sports in high school in middle school high school I was a

theater nerd okay I want a nerd that scores you some points aristocratic that's a good that adds a couple that deducts a couple of garbage points for sure definitely that takes a couple points off theater very sophisticated I like it let's let's take it back I want to know a little bit about the holidays at your house number one did you have colored light did you celebrate Christmas or Hanukkah Christmas did you have colored lights on the tree no we're not that trashy great white lights all the way or you're fucking garbage oh man color lights are a tough fucking look man yeah and the

reason I wanted to ask this is because one of our listeners gutters lost he sends in a lot of questions he wanted to know did you have eggnog around the holidays yes I've actually never tried eggnog but my family is obsessed with eggnog and whiskey so that's that's trashy but it's awesome you Kevin you never had eggnog right nobody fucked it no we used to do these things called nutty Irishman it was like a Kahlua vodka and Bailey's maybe no I remember a time in the 80s when when my family thought Kahlua was like the fucking fountain of youth fruit of the fruit of the gods dude that was like diamonds and

pearls to people in the fucking in the mid-aizy oh my god they got a bottle of Kahlua yeah fucking trash yeah eggnog's garbage but it's awesome and I'll tell you who doesn't make a who doesn't make a bad one if you stop over to that wall around the holidays walla chocolate milk I started smoking weed I would go to wobble and either get a chocolate milk or one of those milkshakes they have for those machines yeah they were fucking saw walla it's just a great establishment shout out to Mr. and Mrs. walla down there yeah yeah when that milkshake machine when you know the

one where you pull it out of the freezer and you put it in and it makes it man that fucking blew my mind man all right I got one growing up did your mom used to use like cool with containers as Tupperware or like any other container as Tupperware no she actually didn't classy that's that's good pointed but no she did not there was one or two times where I opened up the butter thinking it was buttered it was like gravy or something I'm like what the fuck surprise motherfucker yeah what about Hawaiian pizzas that's something that you would eat oh my god yes from pizza from pizza hut yeah

come on that's good shit right there oh pizza up a thing hey I didn't say anything about the buffet pizza buffet fucking forget about it that is a class all the way that shit was awesome all those buffets back in the 80s have you already member of your family ever been a member of a studio audience I have yeah recently or back in the day the beans I got I felt very special but I found it anybody could get that to TRL I went to TRL all right yeah that I mean that's a get back in the day that's so cool the only pass you get is double dare that's the only pass I can give you no TRL is pretty close no TRL is not trapped to

TRL follow your older TRL cool dude TRL was fucking I mean that that was the biggest show in the world at the time that's yeah that's great what's that punk's name that ran it Carson daily oh yeah oh man that's too funny okay does anybody in your family play scratch off lottery tickets I do you ever win anything big I have won so many times so my favorite scratch off the only kind I get is the crossword puzzle scratch off and they come in variables of $3 $2 $5 $10 and 20 I love that I love one of the other things I love about while was they have a lot of lottery ticket machines but yeah I won a hundred bucks a couple

times like I yeah and the scratch off crossword puzzles really make you feel like you're about to win and they're so addicted they're so addicted once you once you hit a dollar I'll stop at the the place right near New York comedy club on 24th Street get the dollar ones if I win a free get a dollar I'm back over there and I haven't gotten a birthday card since I was nine years old that didn't have a couple of fucking scratch offs in it yeah you want it you want to hear something real trash sometimes there's a couple times where it justie don she's the one who got me hooked on these scratch off crossword puzzles back

in the day we still like pop an Adderall just furiously scratch these crossword puzzles one and then there's a deli right by me and we would keep winning so we will buy the amount of tickets for the amount of money that we won oh my god it was so much fun I wish I could say I didn't enjoy myself but I really did it's so trashy I mean we get on we get on on Christmas like we get like big packs of them oh yeah my family is a corner my family would have tournaments on Christmas because my dad had one of those big like man-caped basements and one of the top prizes was a tree that had like clips on it and my mom like put all these

a lot like hundreds of lotto tickets every year you guys remember did you guys go through the phase there was a phase of my family where I'm like people's anniversary they would get money trees they would get like a bouquet of flowers that was made out of bills yeah yeah one time we did that for instead of the lotto ticket tree we did a monkey can't even make no sense to me yeah that would be like 100 in there like money does grow on trees would you have any try colored popcorn in your house growing up never but I was obsessed with popcorn man and I ate it pretty much every day I ate a bag of microwave popcorn every day

to the point where I had to go to st. John's hot or John Hopkins hospital for like 12 hours once when I was in college to get all these tests because my testings were so fucked up oh my god they ate too much microwave popcorn Jesus shit yeah that's not good holy shit that's no try color no try color okay have you ever gone to a Caribbean island and come back with cornrows in your hair with braids no no no I see we fully zest I'm shocked most of the female listeners just because obviously the longer hair but and they all say no but it back in the day every I feel like every girl that went to Jamaica came back yeah for

like a couple weeks one side of their head and cornrows in it yeah that I would have been above that when I was in high school I didn't go on a vacation until my first ever vacation I've ever been on because when I was a kid we always just went to visit a relative so that was it wasn't really we never went on a proper vacation my first ever vacation was five years ago so just go to a place and just to go yeah yeah yeah wow did you get cornrows in your hair then oh man all right do any of the male members of your family uncles cousins father have a ponytail no okay no my brother grew his hair long once but

that's good and to donate it oh there you go yeah I guess you had a ponytail for a brief amount of time but that was for the purpose that's that yeah that's anti garbage that's yeah that's a wholesome move right there also do any of them wear Cowboy boots no it's a big one no no but we do go to NASCAR races I love that you don't think that was something that we wanted to know I should have fucking live with that yeah oh man that's tough my stepdad big cowboy boot guy big NASCAR guy yeah I'll tell you what it's garbage but I'm doing I see that infield where they've got all the fucking trucks off they are set up

I was like a good time man you know the Richmond Virginia track is the shortest I know too much about NASCAR brother repair cars I know how to fix cars and shit but the NASCAR track is only three quarters of a mile so it's the shortest track in the NASCAR races and there's a lot of crashes so it's a very it's actually very entertaining yeah did you ever all this did you ever go up good did you ever go to Flemington there used to be a racetrack in Flemington New Jersey oh no that we would go to my stepdad you this is how trashy I am my stepdad used to race cars actually that sounds really trashy we used to go we

used to go to Flemington New Jersey no it started out as dirt track and then it you know whatever they paved it I guess they got enough gathered a couple of bucks and paved it and then we would go like Fridays or and he would race and he would crash every time and then oh shit then like a month fixing the car it was yeah I mean it was so trashy so trashy dude your mom married Ricky Bobby yeah that's tough man all right miss Hutchinson yeah have you ever collected any of the following num chucks no Chinese star no what about beanie babies cold so my parents had a collectible toy store they graduated from selling

things at a flea market table to having a store after my dad retired he had to like took him a while to figure out a job that he liked and and while we had the collectible toy store when the beanie baby craze was was everywhere my mom would make me go into stores to buy all she would give me hundreds of dollars and I would have to buy all the beanie babies because they were they weren't letting people to resell them because they're worth more than you were buying them for at the store and I remember when the McDonald's had many beanie babies in their happy meals I was probably about six or seven my parents would go to the

McDonald's drive through get 20 happy meals just for the toys so I would eat McDonald's for straight up six months oh my god that is a new level I didn't think I thought you were garbage this is a whole I mean did you ever go to the month this is inside baseball game but you ever go to the the Montgomeryville Mart no or the Montgomeryville there was a flea market up by the Montgomeryville mall well luckily by the time I moved back to Pennsylvania they were past that that was the end of the collectible toys phase wow dude man 20 happy you would think as a kid that would be like a dream come true for you now what are you

talking about like reheat like cold McDonald's doesn't fly no no oh they would take it home and like put it in the refrigerator and then like dish them out like that yeah wow holy shit they call child services on you now if you did something like that uh-huh uh-huh wow that's fucking crazy all right another one growing up did you ever make tang or country time lemonade my grandmother who had suffered a stroke cuz she just ate spaghetti and butter all day hey she's hey bitch I love me some butter noodles don't don't get it twisted butter noodles all I want to know some white trash shit we used to have butter noodles all

the time but also peanut butter and butter sandwiches but not even real butter country crock oh man that big that big tan thing a country yeah that's pretty good where I grew up I was born in Wilkesbury Pennsylvania and up there it was always the thing that when you made a sandwich like you made like a ham and cheese sandwich that was but you buttered the bread it was always butter but you didn't like like a like a it wasn't grilled though cuz I know no trees you brought cold I'm saying you would just make that make my skin crawl dude that's gross it was so good I'm telling you it's unbelievable did you

guys ever eat steak ums oh what I had them within the quarantine I've had that's why I bought them out of cuz I'm down here I'm down in while what so I was at the I was at the acne and I went and as they had steak ums and my girl is my girl my wife she's from Europe so I was trying to explain what they were so I just bought them and it's really like it's paper meat it's paper meat it crumbles in your hand it's so well I didn't realize you're supposed to like chop it up to make like a cheese steak kind of thing my dad didn't do that we just had sheets of meat slices on white bread yeah dude that's the way to do it

just like that was maybe a little maybe a slice of cross her craft single on there a little bit of fucking ketchup and business man that's a cool a jammer in that mix and you got yourself a fucking charit so that brings me to that brings me to my next question were you a juice box or a Capri Sun household growing up bags over I know look at this kippy Capri Suns and then cut the top off and they'd be popsicles in the summer yeah that's a good idea we never got a Capri Sun our highest pay grade was a high C you guys might be too young to remember dude my dad still buys high C's the fruit punch in the orange I was an orange guy

to be honest with you those things are unbelievable they were great man I remember we used to get it in a can they had to use a can over you use that you had to open two things remember that it was like a tomato sauce can like a beer they used to sell them back in the day like that these are by juices like that and then like in a big can like it would be like a foot high and it was probably like you know four inches wide or whatever it was like a huge soup can and you would have to open it and it would go go go go go right out of the fucking can we used to buy it like frozen juice it cans like lemonade or

strawberry yeah that's real I was gonna I was gonna ask the kid the next week's guess that that's so funny they don't make it they had to stop making that stuff the concentrated fruit it's still out there they still make it we just evolved my mom watching that up with a fucking wooden spoon trying yeah that was not something you could do in a pinch that you had if you were thirsty you were gonna die you know what I used to do that my mom used to get so mad at she would go into their freezer to pull one out to make juice and like half of it would be gone because I would go and eat it concentrated slushy it's good

shit yeah fucking awesome that's like that's like coke straight from Columbia that's the fucking good shit yeah wow dude fully so doing this podcast so many I mean you learn a lot about each other you learn a lot and I mean the reasons why you are the size that you are are not I mean that's you're like an onion you're the fattest onion ever frozen concentrated orange juice and when I was a kid there was two places that I wanted to live in fantasy I wanted to live in a country-time lemonade commercial because remember how awesome that place looked the old guys sitting on the porch chilling kids riding their

bikes down the field I wanted to live there and I wanted to live in Hidden Valley oh my god I'm a ranch talk about dude I won't I literally I was at the good during the corona pandemic okay you're in you're taking your life in your hands when you go to the grocery store I was in the grocery store for like 15 minutes where I wouldn't budge because I couldn't find Hidden Valley Ranch because I won't get anything else but Hidden Valley if it ain't Hidden Valley take that shit belly yeah yeah I hear you take it to the bank ever played darts

oh my god yeah I played darts gotta buy a Gio holy shit I peg myself is quite a piece of garbage and I only had one when I was in college oh I had one growing up I have I go I used to go to fat black pussycat all the time to play darts I was like my favorite spot to play darts darts is so fun though couple of beers and throw the fucking darts around a little bit forget about isn't it crazy that they're allowed to have that though in a place where people are drinking yeah absolutely it's it's yeah it makes you wonder you know they really put a lot of trust in people I've even on axe throwing they let you drink there too I

look at that shit and I'm like are you fucking kidding me odor and I got stoned one dance odor and I got stoned once and went to throw axes so I'm like that's fucking that's insane I would never see I see the videos of them like bouncing back and flying at the people yeah which is good because all right I got another one did you I got two that they're and can't set my reference to fully growing up did you we have milk for dinner yeah that's two for two I believe on guest hippie yeah no I don't know that's tough no he thinks that's a real trashy thing I think it's classy so they were classy so I think I think that

knows no economic balance milk for dinner you milk for dinner is trash you you've never been to the fucking you know you've never been to Del Frisco's or the Capitol Grill got a t-bone and a fucking glass of 2% it doesn't happen real oh man milk for dinner that's tough yeah yep holy shit I did not see it going this way by this I honestly I mean like I did not see it going this way at all I love it oh man you leaned into it I love it I fucking love it your mom ever make meatloaf oh yeah nice so that's there you go have you ever owned a jet ski no ever run into jet ski no ever sold jet skis yes I've been on a

jet ski once and it was terrifying man are there any three liters of soda in your house growing up as a kid oh my god yes generic brand too and and cereal in the bag oh yeah oh yeah so embarrassed by that like dad we're not poor he's like we kind of are relaxed like that's sometimes some listen let me tell you something as an expert on on this all right sometimes the cereal in the bag some types were better than the regular ones no way no some of them were better I was so embarrassed that we are a household that had bag cereal I don't know where I got this from though but I

was humiliating for whatever stupid ass reason yeah well it's different than what everybody else has that's the thing you know so you're like this isn't what you see in the commercials they're not you know they're not they're not advertising you know chocolate owes or whatever right commercials doesn't have a mascot yeah only the lemur so did but sometimes ever I would go over places like friends house who would do bag cereal and they would put it in like a Tupperware container yes yeah that's that's fucking sitcom shit right there and I'm like who are we fooling here by those Tupperware containers and they

said no it's like they wanted me to be embarrassed yeah that's tough we used to get it wasn't in a bag but it was it was off-brand and we always got it it was like it was an off-brand frosted flicks and that was one it was like special K it was so fucking shitty I love special K dude loved it I remember one time I frosted like we didn't have it I'm like I remember like fighting with my mom and she just took special K and put sugar just sprinkled it on that I was like hey we can do this all day long yeah it's not bad I'd rather have that you know what sucked to we always got you guys ever get kicks cereal my god kicks yes those

things I loved it you like kids golden grams kick come on golden grams was awesome and toast crunch you know you're talking high dollar items here you know what I saw recently that I forgot but I they had French toast crunch do you remember that I was never allowed but yeah I was never allowed to get the cookie crisp but I'm like yeah toast crunch the same shit my mom was the same rule say only three kids got cookie crisp nobody got cookie Chris yeah either your parents hated you or they didn't want to discipline you or they like didn't have time for you yeah yeah cookie Chris lived up to the hype

though when I got into like high school and college I started buying it on my own fucking not too shabby you know you know what was pretty bad too I don't it's I don't know if it's a trashy or you know a fat thing because I was a fat kid was we would make cereal out of 10 egrams what I don't know look at that just it just popped into my head that we would do that I don't think my mom co-signed it I think that was like me and my brother type thing nice when you got to the bottom of that that milk and a couple less Teddy Graham yeah that sounds delicious all right I think I

only got one or two more here did did you have a garage fridge at any point in your life yeah we had a garage fridge and a freezer love a garage fridge man that's oh yeah people are starting to comment and stuff about this they say they're only one one fridge people like I'm like that's I think I never thought about how weird a garage fridge is actually it's great I think you're talking about this all the time I think we were talking about it Korean I think it was Korean didn't have one maybe and we were like yeah it's never like you know whenever buys two fridges it's not like it's like leftover or you found it

somewhere yeah exactly an uncle was getting rid of a fridge and you're like I will put it in here yeah why not yeah that's funny my final question is have you ever gotten your blood pressure taken at a CVS yeah I got news for you kid you're garbage man talk about the nail in the coffin Kevin Kevin get away from that lady she's garbage too by proxy yeah that's right oh my god that was so much fun Christina thank you so much for sitting with us is there anything anything you want the gang to know out there sure I call us podcast called guys we fucked with Korean Fisher it's available on luminary and very very happy

and proud about that one that's we got a lot of fun episodes in the log and I have my own solo podcast called the voices in our heads that's just me available everywhere and I have a short film that just came out called Dwell that I wrote and starring and with a bunch of other comics I'm very proud of it so I saw it it's awesome you're great congratulations very good job thank you my yeah my social media is at Christina hutch it's k-r-y-s-t-y-n-a and that's we can find the links there guys if for some reason you don't follow her which I'm sure if you listen to this you do please check out all of

Christina's project she's absolutely killing it we appreciate you coming in and not and sit with this buddy kippy what do you got for him just again please make sure you rate review subscribe share with a friend as we you know get this puppy off the ground here full video available on YouTube and subscribe and comment there we'll interact with you that whole all that biz and all I'm on social media at Kevin Ryan comedy on all very nice H Foley on ice on Twitter at Foley Graham's on Instagram again Christina thank you so much kippy kippy great great great time with both of you two kids bye Kevin he's seepin yeah he's

very tired see kippy that's a nice little puppy doggy guys thank you so much for listening hot you the best I appreciate you buddy so much fun bye guys see