Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Natasha Leggero!

Episode Date: November 21, 2022

Kippy and Foley are with the hilarious Natasha Leggero! It's a fun one. Thanks for listening. Love youse guys. Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Follow Foley: https://www.insta...gram.com/hfoleycomedy/ Live Shows: https://linktr.ee/AreYouGarbage PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://www.bonfire.com/store/are-you-garbage/ Aura Frames: https://auraframes.com/garbage Manscaped: https://www.manscaped.com Promo Code: Garbage Established Titles: https://www.establishedtitles.com/garbage True Classic: https://www.trueclassictees.com Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Stop the show gang. Let's talk about that middle-class famous store, baby. Oh, baby coming up to the fourth quarter on that Down to the finish on only a few times to see us Gang, it's a good time come on out and see the live show to mix the stand-up comedy Plus we played a little a yg with the crowd It's a great way to introduce new people to the show so bring this squad with ya We got some tickets left for the second show in Providence, Rhode Island in December And we got some a few tickets left for our second show in Boston in December get those tickets Let's party gang this episode is brought to you by our good friends at established titles
Starting point is 00:00:32 Isn't it your purchase as little as one square? Keep going baby Your purchase as little as one square foot of land and you yourself can call yourself a lord or a lady Uh-huh. I'm a lord during the week a lady on the weekends. That's all it takes. Yeah, baby Guys title packs give you at least one square foot of dedicated land on a private estate in Edleston, Scotland And an official certificate of the Crest our accents are all over the map today It makes an amazing last-minute gift and baby wearing gifts given seasons So get one for the boys for the girls for the lords. Yeah, yeah
Starting point is 00:01:15 Titles is running a Black Friday sale right now plus if you use the code garbage you get an additional 10% off Go to establish titles dot com slash garbage Don't talk when I'm in the ad read establish titles dot com slash garbage and get your gifts now and help support the channel Do it establish titles dot com slash garbage do it. Yeah, welcome to another exciting edition of are you? Garbage the show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or Absolute trash now here are your hosts Kevin Ryan and H Foley Hey Everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast. This is our you garbage
Starting point is 00:01:57 Mm-hmm So a little show we sit down with your favorite comedians and we find out they're good to be classy They're just a big old piece of trash. I'm your hostage Foley coming at you on a beautiful day We're down here at Anthony's basement. She just picked up the Thanksgiving turkey Okay off the local drug dealer Lisa here I gotta tell you by the size of the birds pretty good year this year for the boys. Okay, so shout out the ice pick We appreciate it. My Carlos is coming at you from right next to me unamused this week. What are you gonna? Do keep the streak going he is the CEO of our you garbage. She is an international businessman
Starting point is 00:02:29 He's the Prince of Park Avenue, but always the king of the boardwalk, baby. Give it up for Kevin James Ryan Hey gang, thanks for tuning in as always Please make sure you rate view subscribe on itunes full video available on YouTube as you know those numbers are The greatest website of all time The patreon.com so I show you garbage check at the fuck out gang Oh, love that money and have a nice quick shout out to our producer extraordinaire the magic man makes us all look good He works the ones and twos he crosses the T's and he dots the eyes give it up for T-Bone McMuffin Toby McMullin everybody Yo pinkies out when you're sipping your bebs boys
Starting point is 00:03:06 Yes Sharp dress lady, that's what I'm talking about gang We couldn't be more excited to have her incredibly and I mean incredibly special guest here with us today for the first time She's a very funny very successful stand-up comedian actor podcaster and now author and you might have seen her in but not limited to Do yourselves a favorite gang get comfortable because she's an earner. She's got a rap sheet on her. We got it's always sunny in Philadelphia You got Reno 9-1-1. You got the Sarah Silverman program Aqua Teen Hunger Force till death pretend time free agents Community arrested the veli Meryl Streep
Starting point is 00:03:47 But none of them are hits. So just stop comedy bang bang Neighbors inside Amy Schumer. Let's be cops. No, there's a modern family Too many credits like it's all good show then we got Ellen. We got Kimmel Belly tonight show this is not happening Chelsea lately 69 episodes of that Yes, it was my god, you got James Corden WTF Seth Meyers the Daily Show Joe Rogan co-bear Conan You got Brickleberry drug history Superstore Bojack Horseman American Dad Dice teachers alone together Credits and no one people don't know who I am. They're like, oh, she seems familiar Nuts, what are you talking about? You also got hoops. You got another period 33 episodes of that
Starting point is 00:04:40 You got monster. Hi the movie got Craig Kilborn. You got Carson daily world dumbest 27 episodes of that last comic standing You got 11 on the piece for that Why am I she has her own comedy special special presents She has multiple stand-up specials out including live at bimbos and the honeymoon stand-up special And of course you can hear every week on Netflix and you can hear every week on the amazing podcast the endless honeymoon And also she is here and let's honeymoon podcast brand new book Deserves my children. The world deserves my children. Yes. Well, ladies and gentlemen the one the only Natasha Everybody does
Starting point is 00:05:25 That's not all my credits There's a couple of ER's in there I forgot to mention No, because I looked it up once and I had more than like most Actresses who are like very famous, but that's not a good sign No, what are you talking about a bunch of bit parts sure But I mean it's a lot if you're in a show that goes for five seasons Everything gets canceled then you don't have as many you have way more credits. Okay. Yes. Congratulations on the book Thank you, gang do yourself a favor go out and pick it up. Yes, absolutely amazing
Starting point is 00:05:57 We're so happy to have you here. Give us the backstory give us the origin story of Natasha Legerro of my book or of my of me of you the origin story of the origin story where you from where'd you go up? Give us the whole deal Okay, well, I have to say I'm from Rockford, Illinois. Okay, and I Single mom, okay, three kids. Okay, had a brother who kind of traumatized our life. He was a bad kid Okay, so that kind of overcame a lot of our thing
Starting point is 00:06:30 I was like the mom because my mom was working all the time my dad was Italian he kind of was abusive towards my mom So he left and then she kind of raised us all herself your mom Italian too. She is not she's Swedish Okay, and she was a receptionist at a locksmith's office and I was kind of like the babysitter and then when I was 12 she always had me in swim lessons and then she like put me in a theater class cuz swimming was full and then Just take this girl, please
Starting point is 00:07:04 She needed a place she needed like she didn't have a nanny or babysitter daycare daycare So then the cheerleaders were all fooled up. So you won the football team and I did go to Catholic school So I was in this Catholic school uniform at the theater school I you know at the wise theater school and they just happened to have also a theater in Rockford That was a regional theater and then they had remembered me from the class when they needed a kid So like six months later They called st. James elementary and we're like was there a girl they were they were trying to find me And so they found me and then I started to become a part of this theater regional theater. That's that's pretty sweet
Starting point is 00:07:40 I didn't get paid like regional theater is like part equity. So it was like heart down on there down on their luck actors from Chicago And part like delusional townspeople And then me and I was like the kid in like every show no Randy you can't play any I'm sorry Come on, man So I got to kind of escape this life and become a part of the theater which became like Very dear to me Like I remember when I was like on hiatus or there wasn't a show and I had to like not leave school on Wednesdays for matinees I would like you know start humbly like like um
Starting point is 00:08:18 I would just get like hyperventilating and like I just wanted to go back to the theater like I was just like it was like my home You never got paid at all for anything. No, I think that's the idea with regional theater is like the equity people get paid It wasn't like that. That's still pretty cool though. It was cool It was it was definitely a great education and it you know set the path for me for my whole life And sure I am extremely grateful for my mom to my mother for doing that and I hope to do the same thing for my child There you go It's put him in enough things to see what what sticks what they like passionate about yeah, and what they're good at and you know I'm like extremely fortunate that that happened to me because then for the you know starting at 12
Starting point is 00:08:58 I was like I'm gonna be an actress. I'm gonna be an actress. So then I went to Do I keep going? Yes. Oh my god, please. Okay. Well, do you want to know more about my home life? I mean, yeah, how much my mom's house cost Do you have the number on matter of fact we bought it? For like $60,000 and I think now it's worth the $90,000 in Rockford, Illinois. It's a very small bungalow That was an unbelievable read of what the show is. Yeah But I mean I'm about to pull it up on Zillow. I thought you're gonna say 600 grand 30 grand 50 years
Starting point is 00:09:35 It didn't go it didn't go up much But it's you know Rockford is the second biggest city of Illinois. It's the home of cheap trick Okay, which you know, but as I grew up I had jobs in addition to the theater. I worked mode lawns Hell yeah, okay, I edged them, you know I'm a dirtbag. Yeah, I Had paper routes. I actually got in trouble once because I had like a few paper routes I had like the Rockford Registrar star, which is like the legit paper But then I had those like other ones that were free that people would yell at me for giving them
Starting point is 00:10:09 And I remember one winter I was like standing on a corner waiting for my mom to pick me up And I was just like dropping the because people were yelling at me So I would like given the paper and a woman would come out and be like And so I was sitting on a corner what standing on a corner And I was just kind of dropping the papers for my little sack in front of me and then kicking them into the into the Respect that Looking up like no like it's not happening
Starting point is 00:10:38 Some old person called the city on me And then I got in trouble. So I had a lot of jobs and What age did you start working? Probably 12. Well, I was contributing to the household. No, no, no, no pocket money It was money for me to like buy my Benetton, you know stuff and a spree and whatever I wanted sure a couple of bangles tapes I was more into the Smiths Did you have a Morrissey poster in your room? No in my room was the clash. I was very into like punk rock
Starting point is 00:11:14 Okay, I had the clash. I remember I had a du caucus I Know you got a Margaret Thatcher poster in your room You know, I just remember I was very passionate about being a Democrat for some reason Dan Quayle with his eyes scratched out. Oh I remember my mom said too, she took it out. She's like, we do not want to advertise, you know, what you are. Yeah, that's classy That's very middle America. It's like, you know, keep it shut. Exactly. But later in life I remember my husband put a Bernie Sanders sign outside of our
Starting point is 00:12:00 Our house in LA and I was like get that out of here Stop it. So But let me just say to my whole persona my whole MO in life is Reinvention so I don't know if this like but butts up against What you're sure you're thinking so where you are now to where you came from. I'm saying just because you're from Garbage doesn't mean of course not so you we have people that started out not not trashy and then became garbage We have people that started out garbage and then like you said reinvented themselves. That's bad started out classy became garbage I don't wish that on anyone. It's also like money doesn't matter in the scale. Okay, I mean, it's not money
Starting point is 00:12:44 It's it's it's it's deeper than that. Okay, so I went to high school was in the theater the whole time Thought I would get into Juilliard based on my headshot. It didn't happen Definitely delusional took it out of Sears Olin Mills headshot I was like ready for I was so confident and then that didn't happen Then I auditioned for DePaul in Chicago and they were like we think you're better suited for our technical theater program to which was like That was like very You know that was really hard for me to handle wanting to be a roadie Well, I think that what happened was they probably were like we're full
Starting point is 00:13:20 So why don't you come into the tech sure I took it very personally of course you have to and then I have a Vandetta Yeah, so then I finally got into ISU on a scholarship Theater program and I went there for two years and then finally one day I opened up backstage West and it said like auditions Happening for Stella Adler conservatory in New York City But in Chicago was the audition so I went to this guy's hotel room. It was very odd how things This guy's hotel room and he admitted me I didn't even have to touch him Try it out for the actor studio at an auto body shop Yikes, so I did that and I got in and then I finally got to go to New York. That's awesome
Starting point is 00:14:04 And then you know, I stayed here for like four years and couldn't get an agent. It was really rough But I did go to Stella Adler conservatory. I finished my Community or not community college, but I it was hard for me because I was transferring credits from ISU to Hunter College to Brooklyn College Like I was just trying to go to city universities because it was cheap I think I think Hunter was like 1200 a year. It was so cheap and are you doing this all on your own? Are you paying for all this yourself? Yeah, that was my mom's thing She was like you have to go to college, but she didn't pay for it But yeah, that's your problem. You figured out that was her one hope for me because she was like two credits short when she married
Starting point is 00:14:39 My dad, so that so I was like this is really important to her I'll do it and by the way all those young kids out there who don't want to go to college It's like I learned so much at college and I took all these classes that I would have never taken like I remember I took a woman's study class and I learned all about Edith Wharton and like that is what Helped me, you know how plant the seed for another period, which is like the thing I'm proudest that I did sure the show that I created for three seasons on Comedy Central, of course So yeah, I think that College is really good
Starting point is 00:15:08 So I went there and I finally got my degree and couldn't get an agent now No stand-up yet. No stand-up I was like fuck this fuck New York go into LA if they won't have me in New York. I'll go to LA I got an agent and then I remember I was in audition classes or I was auditioning in New York and or in LA Because I finally got an agent there and then I remember thinking like all the actors were so annoying and like so vain In the in the waiting rooms They were all so competitive and then all of a sudden I would go to an improv audition and I was like who are these people Funny and cool wacky vain and you know
Starting point is 00:15:49 Like I was like, oh, I want to be in this group of people So then I took like every class I could find that had anything to do with comedy If it was if it had anything to do with comedy and like was like 60 miles from my house I like took it like so I I would just took Improv second city Groundlings stand-up comedy. I just did every single thing and you know And then I finally did stand up for the first time and it just ended up working out Correct. Well also what I liked about it though because you know
Starting point is 00:16:22 I my degree from Hunter is in theater criticism and I was you know, I was good at it and I got like, you know, some I got like some awards for it So people were like really that was the first time people were like, oh, you're really good at this writing thing because public school and Rockford Everyone was like, you're not an artist. You're not a writer. It was like very negative Okay, and so I felt really confident and then I really felt like my critical facilities were really kind of You know worked in in in this, you know, going to the theater in New York and like writing reviews So then I feel like when I got to LA I was like very critical And so when I saw someone do stand-up that I knew I was like, oh, I can just like stand up on stage
Starting point is 00:17:02 And make fun of how stupid everyone in LA People don't know anything and I was working at the whiskey bar and you see these girls come in who were like actresses And so I was just able to react to it all in like a way that was You know when I saw the girl do it on stage. I was like, oh, I think I could do that It was just this girl I knew a Melanie Vessie who went to Stella Adler and I didn't know about any comedians or you know I didn't know who Sarah Silverman was or any of these like hilarious comedians So I feel like I was so lucky that I just was kind of naive
Starting point is 00:17:34 Yeah, and then I just kind of went for it when it when it happened and you know, that was like 25 years So you got a degree from Hunter College Yes, and then you finished the program at Stella Adler conservatory. That was a two-year acting conservatory And then I'm just like impossible to get into by the way. It's very reputable. Is it okay? I don't know. People weren't that good at it, but you know Everybody kind of sucked if I'm being honest with you. Well, it might be reputable. Hey, whatever you say, Pinhead I've never been shot down for picking someone up. I know. No, no, but let me just tell you I was in the con- no, it was it was very reputable and we learned all about Stella Adler
Starting point is 00:18:09 And we had the same teachers that taught the NYU students all the rich kids So like we had all the same teachers, but we were in like this different kind of program kind of for like the losers But one of those programs But yes, I'm so anyway, I'm babbling I mean you asked me to tell you So you did Stella Adler first then went to Hunter College then went to Hunter College So you're here for six years five years five years, and then you know what happened. What happened 9-11? really Well, and I was living I was living in Harlem
Starting point is 00:18:42 Well, I was in LA at the time But I was I was living in Harlem, and I had subletted my place because I was still like trying to find how out like join the LA who's gonna respond to me and Yeah, and then I was like, oh 9-11 like let's Step to the coast we're out of here. Yeah, it's at the Valley. Huh. All right Pretty classy journey there. Sure. Oh, she's a real like bootstrapper I think you're really gotta like a ball energy you go you do it you figure it out You tell people to go fuck themselves you get on stage the whole night
Starting point is 00:19:13 I forgot the best part the reason I was able to get to LA because I didn't have much money I was waitress saying living in Harlem and then Chase Manhattan Bank, which I couldn't say in the books. They're like you can't say Chase Manhattan Bank We don't give a fuck Come get it. I this is one of I guess the privileges of being a white person is they just sent me an email or a There wasn't even email them. They sent me a letter saying like congratulations You just got $5,000 in overdraft protection And so like my account at Chase Bank all of a sudden had like this 5,000
Starting point is 00:19:51 I could write checks up to $5,000 of what you don't have more than what I had in yeah So I was like immediately like I found like a rent a wreck in LA like a car rental company that would take checks You overdrafted you pay your whole future on overdraft in your account five grand your trash Didn't exactly send you $5,000 no, that's the way you were living Respect it. Yeah, that's the show. Yeah, so I was able to write all these checks To get All these bad checks. Yeah, they weren't bad though. I mean I eventually weren't good They were not good and let's not forget. I probably paid $15,000
Starting point is 00:20:35 To pay all that back sure because there was a time in LA when I first got there I would I had a post office box. I would just check my mail I would open the post office box open it and anything that was a bill. I would just throw in the car I still do that. Oh, yeah, I put it back in the mailbox. I'm like Shit certified Otherwise, I didn't say you have to serve me. That's not a town all weekend You have to serve me if you want that Victoria's Secret $200 by the way, and this was so so many stupid decisions Like it's all bad purchases. You would buy like one thing for $180 and it would just stay with you for 10 years
Starting point is 00:21:11 I'm just getting out of that. Yeah. I'm sorry. Yeah. Well, you're you're in your 30s. That's what your 30s are about I mean, I did it when I was 18, but still Can't let's talk about aura. Oh Maybe or a frame. Let's talk about aura frames gang if you're like me and the bald guy Hey got pictures everywhere. You got him an Instagram. He got him a Facebook You got some wedding photographer won't call you back because you didn't make the deposit or she dumped you or ever It goes either way wouldn't it be nice to have all those pictures in one place? That's where I put my nudes Real tasteful stuff though
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Starting point is 00:23:58 That's 25% off at true classic comm slash garbage Santa won't be the only one slaying. Thanks to true class signal Let's go back. Okay. Let's go back to Illinois for a minute So you guys had a single family home your mom had you guys had one bathroom two bedrooms, okay kids Two floors one floor, although they did put the my brother in the basement. Okay finish basement That's a no Let the mold really sink in Well, no that that house was on wait, there was an attic we redid eventually but not when I was there, okay Does anybody still live there now my mother she dog
Starting point is 00:24:43 So without giving away the the name of the street. Was it a street a road and Avenue Avenue? Was it Avenue? It wasn't a nice part of town, too It was like in a very historic kind of all houses It was a nice place to grow up and what was the name of the grocery store that you went to as a kid Not only did I go to it. I worked at it was called Highlander Gone now sounds pretty prestigious the Highlander and and cheap trick Rick Nielsen would come in and I would be working And I would I was so starstruck by him whoever I was waiting on if I saw him like figuring out which one You know who had the shortest line. I would just start giving people their stuff
Starting point is 00:25:21 Take this let us get the fuck out of my face and a few times. I got him I don't know what I thought These are two cents off shut up lady get out of here Okay, and he's growing up We had a caucus. Well, we had a caucus panel and then we also had a How do you tell someone's garbage from their dogs? Well, if you have lizard snakes Hamsters and we we had a What are they the brown one not a golden retriever Labrador Labrador, okay bad
Starting point is 00:25:58 You're so classy the thought of people owning birds. Yeah, you're like a loose bird family. It's a little different. No birds No, you ever bring animals from the inside like like rehab a squirrel or anything like that No, okay, my mom was actually I think she was aspiring like to have like a speed classy Because you carry yourself with a lot of class you do. Thank you. Absolutely. I think yeah, I think it's all dirty under those fingernails We'll get into it She just actually a little dirty under those gels. I like it High school mascot. Oh my god. This is rough E-rab, huh?
Starting point is 00:26:37 It was like a rapper. I Know it was like East it stood for it because I went to East High School and it stood stood for East red and black Uh-huh, okay, but it wasn't an animal or was it a guy I think it was look like a Native American face or something with a mask on it was not a good thing Fair enough What was the family vacation like growing up? You didn't really do vacations. No vacation. Any weekend or anything Disney World We went to Epcot Center once when my mom had this boyfriend that drove us there drove you from Illinois from Illinois
Starting point is 00:27:13 What kind of car was that? Maxima diesel. Whoa Nissan. Yeah, max. Maybe diesels. I just remember this Diesel yeah, and like pulling over on the shoulder to take a nap with the full car I think this is why I'm like I want to be on a permanent vacation now. It makes sense. Yeah Did people have vacations every every all the time? I don't remember anyone. I knew really we went down to show we went down to the show We have the Jersey Shore, so we would go a little bit different. We're outside of Philly. It was a little bit I never went to Disney World. Okay. Yeah, never. Yeah, my mom went with her girlfriends once when I was like that's a red party
Starting point is 00:27:55 Somebody blue Mickey Get a lap dance from Snoopy any sports as a kid My brothers were in soccer. I was in swimming and diving and I have a I have a whole photo album full of yellow ribbons, which is fourth place They put we're bragging will you they put me in because I was really good I could do butterfly because like a lot of people could do all the sport You know Midwestern is a very broad-shouldered. I'm not like a typical swimmer's body So they would put me in the I am which is individual medley
Starting point is 00:28:28 which is rest stroke back stroke freestyle and then finishing it off with the butterfly and I just remember doing like when I'm doing the butterfly just like a whole like the stadium just of silence Just waiting for me to be done because everyone was already done But I still got like a yellow ribbon and a point for the team for finishing Okay, and I'm glad I mean I'm glad I got to be such a good swimmer, you know fourth place. All right Too shabby a lot of people though. I'll hang out with them and they don't know how to swim My husband doesn't know the strokes. He doesn't know back stroke. He doesn't know breast stroke
Starting point is 00:29:09 So it's like I know the stroke. So like I'm actually above him now And I've swam with people and they're like wow you really know how to do all this, but I can't really compete with it Uh-huh, but I mean I could do all the strokes. You can yeah, okay. I swam as a later fella Yes, I can I can do I do butterfly do breaststroke do backstroke the whole nine yards. What's your favorite one? If I could do it really good at would be butterfly, that's the coolest one. Yeah, I mean that's the That's all right anybody could swim freestyle. You know if a shark's chasing you you get moving Any bands you playing any bands as a kid no you play any instruments now and I'm learning piano What was your first concert
Starting point is 00:29:54 Liberace Really or air supply I don't remember Can't leave with Liberace and then say or air supply my mom took me either Mozart or insane clown posse I can't remember. I just remember I have three memories I remember Kenny Rogers air supply and Liberace at the Rockford Metro Center like being like way too little to be at a concert Hmm, but like just seeing it, you know what I mean like my mom must have been on a date and not Had a babysitter or something Liberace, I remember him and I honestly I
Starting point is 00:30:29 Remember him like it. I was thinking he was phoning it in really Must have been the late show It was just like a lot of like What was he doing crowd work? What's this is good enough for you Rockford? Didn't even like to cut the candles. What's up Toledo? Oh, yeah, there was a piano with Yeah, and then air supply I remember there was like a laser show and then age we talk in here It must have been like Five to eight. I don't know. It was like yeah, man. Shout out the air supply though. Oh, I don't love
Starting point is 00:31:07 As a kid what would be like a treat night out to go to dinner would that ever happen? Would they take you like the ground round or like red lobster anything like that? Would you guys do anything like that? There was an Italian restaurant called Lino's that I really like sounds nice And it was it was like kind of like the classic. It wasn't a chain, but it's like what all the chains are copying Gotcha. Yeah, I bet you they put out a plate of pasta. Oh my god I was so good and I just went back because my dad died and I took my that's okay. I hate saying it's everyone's like But it'll be weird if I didn't How was the view of Parmesan?
Starting point is 00:31:40 But I told my husband I was like you have to try this pasta it's so amazing so we get there and then of course Moshe He doesn't eat pork and he's just like talking to the waiter and he's like so there's no meat in the sauce They're like no, no, it's because I remember it was just a red sauce and they're like no, no And they're like well there is um There is bone broth in the sauce and he's like should I ask him what kind of bone broth it is? He's like maybe it's chicken and I was like no, it's obviously pork and a red sauce What do you mean? So then so then he eats they're like non, you know, like they're special one for annoying people And he's like I don't think that place was that good
Starting point is 00:32:17 Bread they do garlic bread there. Oh for sure Yoki with the bone broth red sauce Drink milk with dinner growing up. No. No, what was your local pizza place? What was the name of that? I mean, I guess that was Lino. You get pizza from there, too. Nothing like a pizza Italian restaurant together Where would you run a movie from? Local video where's the blockbuster or west coast at the town? It was something local that I don't remember. I'm sorry. This is like this is like therapy. How are the grades high school? A lot of C's a lot of C's a lot of D's in conduct
Starting point is 00:32:57 Okay, good it. Uh, well, I went to a creative performing arts program in middle school. So I was you know, I was good in Theater How about the SATs probably took the ACT? I took ACT's. How do you know that? Because what is okay? Yeah, I took the ACT's. I don't know if I should tell this story. No, that's what we want basically because I was really good in like English and You know all the arts I took fiber arts It's like, um, you know like making baskets and stuff There was a lot of like handiwork for the girls you were getting C's
Starting point is 00:33:34 Well, I was getting good grades in that but like I'm saying math science history. That stuff was really bad. She was good with macaroni and glue Basket weaving You finger painted this So the ACT's I remember walking in and I saw this girl who I knew was smart and I just sat next to her And then for the science part I just cheated. I respect that that's not trash class. I cheated science and math What do you think you're gonna come and arrest you you could tell that would you yet? Uh, I got good enough to get into college Okay, there you go. You know because I was trying to get out of rockford. There you go. I like it
Starting point is 00:34:17 Um What was christmas like you guys do lights on the house? No lights on the house, but christmas was like, you know, my dad's family has seven kids and all of those And all of those people have like two families and like all the cousins and the drunk italian That's the italian side Then every my dad must have got christmas in the in the custody thing because like that was christmas was like my dad Christmas night, you know, like so we would go there and it was fun. Would you do the seven fishes? What's that whether you you seven fishes you guys didn't do that? No, okay. They might not have known about that. All right
Starting point is 00:34:51 I'm in west italians at the end of the night A lot of a lot of drunk people arguing about did you fuck my wife or you know, like that kind of fighting sounds like my family party people driving home drunk and uh Real christmas tree real christ might so my this was a thing with my mom She always thought my dad's family was kind of trash and so then they had like a flocked christmas tree What's that? It's white flocks, you know, like white italians love a white christmas tree I've been saying it since I've never met anybody that actually had one italians love except for henry hill and my dad or my mom
Starting point is 00:35:24 It's the gaudiest thing in the world and my mom about new money. They don't do that now. Really. Do they do that christmas tree? No flair I don't see it in la like that is not a thing in la. Yeah, of course and my mom would always have a real one Nice classy. That's classy. Okay. It's clays. Do you stockings too? We did stockings. Yeah So then christmas morning was with my mom love nice Anybody ever been on the local news in the family? Me only me really for good reasons. Well, my brother who's the bad one for the paper scandal Uh
Starting point is 00:35:56 No, no, I mean no when we were growing up. Yeah No, no, but I will say my brother seems to know the law like people who get in trouble with sounds like my kind of guy That's 82 78 right there. Can't touch me like he has a corset A 413 Like actually he spent the pandemic In with it. He got his uh in what's it called when you can't travel probation or um He was a parole because he was getting gas. He tells me the story. He's like, yeah, I'm in the gas station I go in and get myself something to drink and I see this guy without a mask and I'm like, hey brother
Starting point is 00:36:30 Why don't you put on a mask? And and then I'm pumping my gas and the guy comes up to me and he's within 11 feet of me So that I pumped into the face. I'm like he didn't even punch you in the face. He's like, no So he just kind of knew the law that like you're encroaching my personal space. I'm allowed to feel threatened step back Exactly, but it didn't work because he then he got his you know, he's sure he got jammed up exactly So I like this guy though. Yeah, he's all right. I like this Sounds like whole kogan too. Yeah, but he is not the we're not like him, you know Like none of my fam like all the siblings are different. I feel like okay. Gotcha
Starting point is 00:37:04 What was the bike situation growing up? What were you riding? I was riding a pink 10 speed Huffy 10 speeds back in the day were Huffy's about as good as it gets. Remember it went like that. Oh the hand. Oh man. When those dropped that was crazy Yeah, you might as well be a professional and by the way, I biked everywhere. I loved biking no helmet And I would bike to my job. I would bike to my friend's house I would bike around the neighborhood loved it. Could you ride to 10 speed without your hands on the on the bar?
Starting point is 00:37:33 Oh my god, I remember doing it thinking like I'm so cool Yeah, that is cool going down a hill without my hands and I remember my friend telling me like yeah I saw you coming down that hill without your hand something You probably heard a little buzz going around rockford in the 80s and 90s. There was nothing That is so funny that you know that I because by the way, I haven't thought of that since I thought of it When I was going down that hill, so thank you for that and and I loved a bike now, so Um, how old were you when you got your passport? uh
Starting point is 00:38:04 21 no, no, wait. I went to England. Yes when I was at ISU at Illinois State University I was like, I've got to get the fuck out of here. So I did like an exchange program in England. Okay, okay Well, you the you weren't the first one in your family to travel abroad. Were you you were and my parents both never traveled abroad Okay. Wow. All right. Hmm. How many points does that get me? It's negative three. Yeah I'm the same way. I didn't get my I didn't get my passport until last year. Yeah last year. I'm 46 I'm 46 Yeah, Henry. I went to Delaware too. You just hit you with a honey yo, hun
Starting point is 00:38:40 Kip, how about our good friends over there at manscaped? Huh, it's the holidays gang. Do yourselves a favor. Don't forget about the jingle balls down there You know what I'm saying? You got to keep them fresh. Keep the berry dingers. This is what things get this is what things happen You're at a party office party. You want to make sure the nuts are fresh and that you're ready for some action egg Knocks going around you under the mistletoe next thing you know, she's reaching through your pubes are longer than your piece Yeah, get trimmed up down there. So at least they told me guys manscape performance package 4.0 has got it All baby the lawn mower 4.0 body trimmer. We got the weed wacker nose and ear hair trimmer Get that you're at a certain age. You got to keep that shit clean. That's no good
Starting point is 00:39:23 It's got the skin safe technology protect you to protect your holes, baby So you know what to do plus it's waterproof. I'd throw it in a shower clean the ears for god sakes Uh guys, you got 20 off and free shipping with code garbage at manscape.com That's 20 off and free shipping with code garbage at manscape.com Be thankful this holiday season for the best gift from best gift of all from manscape your balls will thank you Kip, let's talk about established titles again Tell you what till the stable boy to get my steed I have to ride over to my land over there in the scottish woodlands
Starting point is 00:39:58 gang as you know Established titles you pick up just one square foot of scottish woodland land and you yourself can call yourself a lord or a Ney-ey-no Uh-huh You guys you get a certificate that has a plot number so you can see the location of your land and baby The hook is let's be neighbors the first 200 people purchasing the title pack using our link will effectively be next to our plots Within a few minutes of walking Let's start an army of garbage and take over those goddamn scott's over there. It's a good time. It's a good gift
Starting point is 00:40:30 Yeah, uh, you can officially change your name to lord or lady put on a credit card playing tickets add some class to your dating profile Uh, it makes a great gift and it's not a gag gift. It's a good time. It's fun. It's cool. It's sketchy Established titles is running a black friday sale. Plus if you use the code garbage You'll get an additional 10 off go to Establishados.com slash garbage to get your gifts now and help support the channel Do it Did you go anywhere? Go to france. Oh, did you love it? Oh, forget about it Oh, it's the best and then shout out to it. You can't get better food
Starting point is 00:41:00 Sister you ain't lying and it's so close to so many other places. You got to go back and go to like we're gonna go back Okay, good. We're gonna go back. Uh, what was your uh, were you cabbage patch doll? Yes, yes for sure. How many did you have? One just one. Okay Well, wait a minute rain on her parade I actually might have had the imitation one. There you go. All right. I feel like I'm I'm purposely answering everything to be Sad, but I'm really no that's good. You would be more you would be trashy if you had oh, we collected them We had six of them. Yeah, that's trash. Having one's normal. Okay. Good. Okay. Good. Keep in one of the boxes Is it a collector's item or something?
Starting point is 00:41:39 No, um At any point did any of your family cars have a beaded seat cover? No, no, no, no, okay You ever see a taping of double dare No, what is that? It's the nicolodeon show. No, no, I remember. Um, you can't do that on television. Sure Oh, man, that was a great show And then my mom got uh one of those because I was really into yo mtv wraps and 120 minutes And then tipper gore came out remember and she was like don't let your kids watch mtv
Starting point is 00:42:09 So my mom got a lock for for cable So she would la or maybe for certain channels. So she had a like a padlock So we couldn't watch mtv anymore. So I had to watch like nicot night. How's the padlock work on the quaker teen I don't know. It was like it was like a little thing. She had the People come over and do damn yikes runs a tight ship. Fuck tipper gore, right? What was the last time you had a hot pocket? We didn't really do that. Okay. No, we ate more like lipped and rice and soup, you know that thing We made a lot of that
Starting point is 00:42:42 That's good. Do we ever ignore noodles? Yeah, we did that. They were pretty good. You were all right Were you a mayonnaise family? You have mail in the house back in the day? Yeah, sure Was it helman's or was it miracle? No miracle whip, honey. Good. Okay. I think my mom was like actually like Purposefully trying to do everything that you think is like the opposite of everything you think is trash Sure. Well, that's a lot of a lot of people that are expected that are you know From that error or whatever try to not be trash. I was like, there's no way we're doing I'm going to work extra hard to have exactly like we had to look on the back of cereal boxes And we can only have things that were the fourth ingredient was sugar. Oh, wow
Starting point is 00:43:17 Really? What was your favorite cereal growing up? Well, I loved fruity pebbles, but I couldn't eat that Sure. So I think I ate like, you know, frosted mini-weights or something Frosted mini-weights are all right, especially if you leave a couple on top where they're crunchy But everything else is soggy underneath real nice bad Did you guys keep your butter on the counter and the refrigerator? Okay. Is that is that a trashy thing? Well, you did just say refrigerator. Yeah So I want to catch you on that
Starting point is 00:43:43 By the way, let me just tell you I have a friend who went to harvard and he said to me once he's like Do you know you say both with an l? Both Jimmy both. Are you both use common? How do you say it? He's like both both. How do you say it? Both see I say it wrong. I say both both like a bolt of fabric, but both Yeah, I get that though. I say does anybody I say library sometimes. What no that is not even compare What do you call the what do you call the stuff that you put on top of your pancakes? Syrup syrup. What do you call it syrup syrup?
Starting point is 00:44:19 That is a hey, we're judging you here Came in here flipped it on me anybody anybody in the family have a claim to have seen a ufo No Wait, I'm starting to think I'm not as much garbage as I thought you're doing all right. So far You're doing all right. Total line total line any lifeguards or magicians in your family No On the pronunciation tip, how do you pronounce the product that crayola makes? Oh my god, my husband and I get in this fight all the time because he gets so mad at me
Starting point is 00:44:49 He's like they are not called crayons. Yeah, they are crayons. That's what I say and he said I said, what are they called? He's like crayons crayons crayola crayons. I say crowns, which is I sorry, don't judge me. What the fuck is this? I say crayons and he's like I don't want my daughter saying crayons It's not crayons. It's crayons. It's crayons. That's where he draws the line. I like it That's awesome. But isn't it some of that regional it is it is it is Do you have a go-to karaoke song? I can't really I like um Well, it came to me, you know later, but I like any country song is good any loretta lin song any
Starting point is 00:45:26 You know old school country old school country. It's easy to sing classy Um, have you ever bought something worn it and returned it to the store? Oh for sure and shoplifted Okay She's really just Also killed a guy rino one time just to watch him die Uh
Starting point is 00:45:48 Does your family make anything homemade like do you guys pickle anything or anything like that? No No, no, no, I'm just thinking like now. I have friends at isu who were like parents were farmers They were there was our dear jerky and stuff. So I know where you're going with this. Yeah, we did not do that Did you have a sweet 16? No, no, okay. Uh, when you started uh making uh, when you started doing well, okay Making a little bit you've been touring for you've been touring for a while. This is like 30 years old though I stopped my waitressing job
Starting point is 00:46:20 Okay. Yeah, no, I know. Okay. So like first first time we're like I have more money than I need to spend this month We're fully aware you've been killing it for a while. So when you start when you started, uh making good money. Was there a silly? Purchase a dumb purchase a dumb purchase jet ski always wanted vacation a hot tub Anything like that or if you've always been pretty smart with your finances You know, I like experiences. Okay I think there was a few times There was a few times I would be on the road and I would pick a hotel that was more than I was making You're a nice hotel kind of gal
Starting point is 00:47:00 You like that you like a finer thing in life. I feel yes, you do. All right. So I was like, you know what? I'm performing people are loving it. I don't care if I spend my whole check on this hotel That's my kind of action. That's what we're talking about. Stay at the ritz in Omaha Well, it was more like the hotel st. Sicilian austin I don't even know what that is, but it sounds nice. Well, I was staying there and then I was like, okay This is an absurd amount of money to spend a night I got to go check into somewhere else and I checked into somewhere else and I was like, I can't stay here after that I was like, fuck it. So but you know, you don't do things like that when you don't have money, of course, of course
Starting point is 00:47:38 Uh, all right, big purchase. What kind of car are you whipping in? What do I drive? I don't like cars Okay, but I do I drive a black mini convertible Okay, um because the mini is very practical You can all of a sudden have parking where other people can't have parking And it's safe because I have a car seat in the back and uh, I just think it looks cool It's the only cool-looking american car in my opinion and it's cheap. Yeah, it's not even I do like it myself Is that the family car? No, my husband has a tesla. Unfortunately. Okay. All right. Unfortunately. Why I don't like the tesla You don't like the tesla. No, it's like, uh, it's it's even just have you guys driven a one you guys don't drive here
Starting point is 00:48:21 No, I I take a look at the back of one in an uber. I don't it's that's too small for me I'm too fat feels like plant feels like a toy But what's annoying about is like just to open the glove compartment. You have to go into like three different places on a computer That's not my that's not for me kick rocks. Give me a four Taurus all day. Yeah I'm a jeep Cherokee man. That's all I roll. Do you wash your fruit? Yes, you do You got it right pretty good. Not necessarily What kind of air freshener do you have in the car? No, come on. Nothing. No, I hate air fresheners
Starting point is 00:48:52 My husband will put one in the car and I'm like, we don't do that. What's it? We don't do that You keep the car pretty clean. I like that. No, you don't keep it. Well, I have a kid That's not fair. There's like, you know molding Cheerios and all that kind of stuff. Um, when you get you get the car washed Will you take the car to get it washed? No, no, you just let it rock, huh? Okay, I mean, I have an assistant who'll help me once a week. There you go once in a while. That's pretty clean That's all right
Starting point is 00:49:20 But you know, I don't get the car washed and no air freshener and don't make eye contact with me either We don't do that. No, I just I had like a helper, you know Of course stuff I have to do with my family. I need help. Of course Um, listen, this is something we revel in you've worked your ass off. You deserve everything that you have We want to hear about that. We love that. We love that. Um, Say you get take out right you in the fam your home. Oh for sure. You get take out. Yes You get it in the house. It's in the bags in the content. Do you put it on a plate or do you eat it out of the container? I can't stand all the styrofoam and it's really I will always try to present it and like
Starting point is 00:49:57 Like I'm like I made it That's nice. I think it's important because the styrofoam is depressing And and also I try to order from places that don't like overdo the styrofoam, you know, it's hard But some of the more Hipper places will have like those little boxes Yeah Get a whole food if we were to come to your house and ask for a glass of water, how would we receive it? Uh, you would get it probably in like a cute, you know, maybe like a
Starting point is 00:50:24 I have these little um, Moroccan glass, you know, like a any bottles at the house bottles of water I would not give you a plot up. No, I don't have plastic like the one we gave you No, and my by the way, my dad is so funny He's italian and his whole thing was like spring water when he would come visit us He's like I need to I need to go buy spring water and I'm like what was spring water And he's like in columbian coffee. We have to get columbian coffee But his whole thing was spring water and I was like no dad the water here is filtered and he didn't trust it He only wanted to go get water from the grocery store
Starting point is 00:50:56 In plastic he would get like a 24 pack of like plastic bottles and me and my husband are like something you can trust Is awful and not to mention he'd like fill the refrigerator with sausage and cheese and motion would like open The fridge and just be like the italians are in town That's uh, do you do sparkling water or just regular? I do like sparkling at the restaurant sparkling or still sparkling at the restaurant La Croix in the house And if you came to my house, I probably first offer you a la Croix and I would say which of these six flavors do you want? What's your go-to drops the six flaves on you lime is good Okay, now just back to the water thing so we get it in a nice way questions like you know all you know what i'm gonna say
Starting point is 00:51:37 You know don't make me say it. We would the lime We would get it in a nice moroccan glass, but what is it actually coming from is it coming from the the faucet? It's coming from the refrigerator that has a filtration system And what's that refrigerator is a viking? Sub-z. What are you rocking? Um, I don't get too into like that kind of stuff. I'm I just got whatever you know, is it silver or is it silver? Of course it is Open this is not a pulper. Okay, open that. Where's this? Where's the freezer on the bottom? Yeah. Yeah, it is. Yep
Starting point is 00:52:07 But i'm not one of those people who has like, you know, it's like wallpapered refrigerator Those are real. I got you. I got you. Is that classy? That's kind of seems tacky I'm trashy, but it's classy to me. It's stupid to pay $10,000 for a refrigerator. I like that. That's a classy answer Do you have a pool at the house? I do Nice above ground Do they even have those in LA? I don't know. I've never been invited. Um, okay
Starting point is 00:52:39 Is it salt water fresh water? It's a mix Does it have the beach entry or the steps? Um, well, it was it's from the the house the pool was put in the house in the 70s So I but what's cool about it is it had a diving board Which I did get rid of because I have kids and I was like, I don't want to be the house that has like a fatality Sure, but the pool does go to like eight feet, which is holy shit. Not very common. That's awesome So you can dive into the pool. Yeah. Just the deep end sure
Starting point is 00:53:11 But then the the shallow end you step in I think yeah, okay. Is there a jacuzzi attached to is there a hot tub? Any waterfalls? There's like a little bit of a fall. Yeah, I redid it and Make it as as cool as I could. That's awesome. I was going to the bathroom. You got his and her sinks No, just one sink. Well, I I restored my house. So it was like an old fifties bathroom So I tried to kind of keep what was there a little bit of that vibe They didn't really do that then anything heated is the floor heated. No, no, no, no, that would be nice though
Starting point is 00:53:41 I do appreciate shower and a tub or a tub in the shower in the same thing. Yes. It's the same thing one one Yeah, no, no, there's a there's a shower and then also a tub rainfall No, it's an old shower. Okay. What's this tub? Is the tub have the life tub is like from the 40s So it's like is it those got the claws on it? No, it's like a built-in, you know those pink bathrooms that everybody had They don't have those in new york. No, we did my last apartment had a pink bathroom Okay, it's like those pink bathrooms from the 40s. It has that so I kind of kept it all but then like restored it Very cool. Well, because I love houses. I love I love old things very much So I try to keep whenever I move to a house. I'm like, what can I keep?
Starting point is 00:54:22 You know that is beautiful and I'm not like a let's let's Knock this knock it out and start over. Yeah. Okay. All right. How many pillows are on the bed? Eight eight pillows Duvet cover. Here's the thing. I'm over it. I think I just like this past two months I'm like, I don't like duvets like I because like I have to put it on, you know, and I'm just like so this is not tenable and so then I looked at parachute and they actually have Blankets that are like a duvet and you can just put that in the washer So I'm in the process of changing over because I think maybe we've evolved past that
Starting point is 00:54:59 Did you grow up with a duvet? No, no, and it's horrifying. I only found out about We didn't grow up with comforts. We had blankets. Yeah, I think it's british or no, remember bedspreads Like I was a big bedspread. Wow. I haven't heard that word in 25 years The best is in is an unduveyed down comforter that like a white one That's the nice and cool between the legs. Those are the best Hey, that's that's what that's what I thought but then a friend stayed over and they were complaining There wasn't like a duvet cover, but he was like a rich kid. So he was like, where's my duvet cover? And I thought it was okay to just put a full sheet on top of the duvet because I see hotels do that sometimes
Starting point is 00:55:34 Yes, they do we need to have some kind of like solution That's why I'm like the parachutes expensive, but I'm like, what is the solution to me not having to like Spend 25 minutes trying to find the And they get they get scrunched down at the bottom of the duvet. It's a whole nightmare. It is a nice feeling King mat king bed california king You got a tv in the room I do
Starting point is 00:55:58 Does that give me but oh I got more points because I don't have a tv in my living room Really because I don't want to have tv in there because I want it to be more of like a place for people to talk and hang out That's a classy response. Um What do you fall asleep with the tv on no You got sleep with a fan on you No, how many pillows do you use when you actually sleep? Um barely one really I like to sleep either flat or on like my oldest pillow that
Starting point is 00:56:23 Has like feathers. It's like very very flat and you sleep on your back On your side, okay That's real prison shit right there. Jesus christ don't come within 11 feet of me But have you noticed like sometimes if I sleep at a hotel with like a real puffy pillow My neck the next day my neck the hotel pillows kill me. Yeah They're beat up. They've been getting beat up people fucking you know a lot of strangers Really start thinking about how gross hotels are. I have to stop. We had a wild year of touring Forget it. I if I think about it. I'm like I can't go in there. People are probably like picking their toenails, right?
Starting point is 00:56:57 And like doing anything. Yeah, that's what we're doing Yeah, I blow my nose. I blow my nose in the sheets I mean, it's bad and then there's no air flow at all. They just turn the air conditioning on. There's no window Very scary. Have you ever stayed in an air b&b? Of course every all the time Okay, and I would I would venture to argue that that is not a good question because there's a lot of really beautiful air b&b I agree. I just wasn't sure your stance on them. Oh, I loved them especially during covid and also they have windows that open And I'm like kind of a fresh air free. We got thrown out of one in the hollywood hills. Yes What did you guys do smoking on the property?
Starting point is 00:57:35 Got me on the ring. Got him on the ring camera smoking weed or smoke cigarettes 3 a.m. Right now out of the smoke Oh, I guess we were like the second house on the hill. It wasn't like we were fucking and you were outside. Yeah in the driveway Yeah, sorry that happened. You guys kicked us out. Did you or anybody in the family participating hands across america? Sounds familiar, but no we absolutely did not okay. Was that like an AIDS thing? Uh, it was something that was the AIDS quilt hands across america was it was for hunger or something like that Yeah, I think so. Uh, what was the last meal you cooked? Hold on and are you making dinner at the house? You guys cook? I make dinner sometimes. My husband does most of the cooking nice. Um
Starting point is 00:58:20 I mean I don't really cook that much. It's okay. Where do you where do you guys food shop now? Um air wand or whatever it's called air wand is I think the most expensive grocery store in america crazy. They have a $26 smoothie And it's called the haley beiber smoothie And it has that paid What's that stuff? It's like asper to asper team. Maybe whatever that fake sugar sweet. Yeah. It's like as blending. So disgusting. Yeah aspartame or whatever Um, but yeah, we order a lot of food. My husband makes a lot of like, uh, you know rice vegetable that kind of like
Starting point is 00:58:56 He's a very healthy cook, but like flavor bombs or like lots of salt lots of seasoning. Okay. I don't hate it It's uh, you know, we try to stay healthy I guess eat as healthy as possible. Do you have any fruit trees in your in your yard? Yeah, she does a lemon tree And a fig tree That's like generational. Well fig tree. Shit. Who the fuck's got a fig tree a lot of people in l. A You guys need to get out of manhattan. Okay. Do you want a railroad? A fig tree How much cash you have on you right now?
Starting point is 00:59:27 Actually, I have that you're gonna hate this answer. What 70 euros That's it, dude. Damn, dude. That's the classiest shit I ever ordered in my life. 24,000 miles away from the closest country to take euro. When's the last time you were in euro? It's yesterday, but wasn't this morning. What's happening? Well, I like I don't know. I just keep seeing it in there and I need to get rid of it eventually, but Holy shit. You got euros on her. I had 20 dollars, but I gave it to the cab driver. She's got the fancy popcorn in there too How how much do you have you look at that? Oh, I do have a 20. You guys can have these euros No, get out of here. You're going back to England. Maybe it'll make you
Starting point is 01:00:07 But I should get rid of that how much not 70 30 wait, they're not euros. They're pounds. Oh, yeah These aren't these aren't I had euros. I gave the euros to my husband feel like they're covered in wax I've never touched them out. You know, it's crazy about pounds is like they have to replace Do you know they're replacing all of this money with charles's face? Yeah, they got to it's long Doesn't that seem like a waste of everyone's life a lot of time? How do you get how do you get everyone's like what happens when I go back? Are they not gonna take this? Nope Liz is out the kids in let's go
Starting point is 01:00:40 But 40 pounds is kind of like 60 dollars 60 bucks. No, is the pound not doing great? Oh, maybe it went down Yeah, it went down the euro and the last time I was in Germany like a month or two ago And it was the dollar was better than the euro and the euro has been doing better than the pound. I believe Hey, Jim Kramer zip it. Let's get to the party. Bye. Bye. Bye. Uh, where did you guys get married? In my yard in your yard under a fig tree Well, I don't really believe like that was that's something I would give as advice to anyone is getting married Like how can you like make it sweet? But like don't people will rip you off
Starting point is 01:01:14 I don't like to get ripped off and I feel like wedding is like a great place for you to get completely like You know and how long goes it that you got married Seven years ago. You were married seven years small wedding Uh, maybe like 200 people or something. We're your yard yard. Maybe 100 and 100 199, I don't We have a big yard. Let's let's ask this. What was uh, what was the biggest gift that you guys got? Well, I did this thing that's kind of trashy, which is a honey fund
Starting point is 01:01:46 So like you told people to not give you a gift. Just give you money towards your vacation. Yeah. Yep Wouldn't you take the girl to rockford? You can't take the rockford out of the girl. Did you do well? Yeah, we got $10,000 to go to Bora Bora 10 g odds, let's go. That's all right. Not too shabby. That's how much it costs to go there, you know Okay, let's say weddings are a big topic a discussion around here around these parts. Are you guys married? I am. Yes He is not Um, were you? Let's say you're going to a wedding, right? I don't do you have like a a niece or a friend of a family? Somebody you're going to a wedding somebody tight not like soup not like, uh, you know
Starting point is 01:02:26 Not a brother or sister or something like but you know relatively close and you do better than that family Okay, what are you putting in the envelope? You're both going you and your husband in us american dollars not this british pound. Yeah, I do 200 Because I feel like 100 is the lowest you can go and if I feel like that's if I think that they need is that 200 American dollars for so 100 for you 100 for your date Um, I would do that for myself too 200 and 200 if if I felt like the people needed it, but a lot of people I don't know people are asking you for money. What do you do?
Starting point is 01:03:04 More than that. No, I'm kidding. Uh, yeah, I'll probably I'll probably do 200 and 200 Two for me two for two for my dame 400. Yeah Straight cash. That's amazing. I mean, maybe maybe I should do more No, but it's also to like that makes sense I who we just had somebody in here talking about that as well of like why am I going to give them money? Oh bobby lee But I was like, why am I going to give Rich people rich people money. It is and I go. Yeah, that makes sense He goes. I don't even go. He doesn't even give a cord that guy
Starting point is 01:03:31 All right, that makes sense. By the way, I knew I knew when bobby bought a car in cash and then like lost the car And then bought the same exact car. He had like two Honda civics. Oh, I didn't know the punch line Yeah, bought bought the same exact car. He didn't know about like insurance or something. He is special with money Ever been to the circus? No, maybe we went. I don't think have you ever left a bad yelp review You know I think I've gotten mad before sure I get it everybody loses the temper from time to time 26 bucks for a smoothie. It's always hotel related. Okay, and it's almost
Starting point is 01:04:12 You know what? I actually I wrote a yelp review recently for this hotel that I love called two bunch palms Which is this very cool special hotel in palm desert, which is Next to palm springs and it has hot springs And it's like so special and all of these people were complaining because All these rich people started going and they're like, I ordered a glass of wine and never came and it's like not that kind of place And I was like lowering the reviews and I had been going there for so many years that I felt like I should I should say like if you're expecting the four season service like pool pool bar It's not this kind of place. So she left a good yelp review
Starting point is 01:04:50 I left a good yelp review But I do remember staying at a hotel that I was like appalled by in new york that had like crusty carpet And I because sometimes I do want to leave the reviews so that people know because I look at reviews sometimes and I'll stay at places You know And so if someone were to tell me that would have been nice But it's so weird because everyone has such a different You know reality of or they have such different backgrounds like what someone thinks is nice So why are you listening to random people? Sure true very true classy answer
Starting point is 01:05:20 And also did you see in her defense? She's smart. She led with the one that she did well And then proceeded to talk about how she dumped on a you know, she don't have business. I respect that What's the luggage situation? Excuse me never check a bag even if I'm going to europe sorry um, I'm I'm about to embark on a tour right now um, and From new york, so I'm in new york and now tomorrow I go to boston and philly dc
Starting point is 01:05:44 And I'm actually going to I've collected a few things and so I asked the hotel if they can ship All the stuff I don't want Whoa, and they said sure no problem where back home back to my house ground shipping because I don't need it That ain't the holiday in I can pay you that no way hosay and they they were like, oh, yeah We can do that. We'll just put it in our mail and we have boxes here And so now I'm just a small black. I don't even know what the brand is It's nothing like fancy, but it's like a roller sure and I just want to I just want to be able to travel lightly That's my whole thing is traveling lightly. What what would it take you for you to check a bag?
Starting point is 01:06:21 not like I'm going somewhere for a month. Okay. Wow That would that would make me like, okay. I have to like bring my big suitcase Very classy answer. Yeah, you fly first class. I assume no No, not always if it's if it's like A modest some more Yeah, I may Um, but I don't think I'm flying first class on any of my tour
Starting point is 01:06:46 Wow, what's the plastic you're using you have an amix card? I do amix business Think so it's silver that business it's platinum. Yeah, I got it. Oh, it's called platinum Be careful with the cameras. Yeah, be careful with the cameras Don't rob you Some people have a gold one. Yeah, plat the silver's better. Oh, it is. Okay. Yeah Capital one card. No Discover card. No diners club. Come on. What's the credit score? Good credit score. Yeah, but it took me a long time Yeah, yeah, I had a tear through it. Yeah, you'll get there. It didn't it didn't take that long
Starting point is 01:07:19 It's kind of funny like all of a sudden you're like, oh wait, I can pay off this and pay off this even if it's like Hey, I have an extra 400 bucks. I can start, you know, yeah Uh, if you make a purchase with your card at uh at a store, will you get cash back if there's an option? Sure, it's always good to have cash. You don't have any you got frank's on you right now Still is rolling around with deutschmarks, but I always want to have you should always have cash, right? Yeah, I mean you'll get cash back from the cashier Oh, my my dad used to have like a lot of cash in a rubber band with 100 on top and all the ones So to my dad, yeah, yeah, are you Italian? No, just a dirtbag
Starting point is 01:07:55 You always keep the heavy bike on the outside Oh, yeah, but my dad did have a money clip. I gotta say he didn't I think sometimes there was a rubber band But usually it was like because his money clip was you know broken or something What kind of laundry detergent do you use? Uh, whatever has the least scent? I hate when garbage bags have sent Barbage bag sent is the trashiest thing It gets on your fingers and stuff. It's like lilac smells like vomit. Yeah, horrible. Yeah, I don't want anything to have a scent Nothing like scent free. Sent free. What kind of deodorant do you use? Uh, I don't need deodorant. You don't use deodorant interesting
Starting point is 01:08:31 I just never I'm part like We're part native american and I heard that native american. Okay. I have heard that. Maybe that's why I don't know Body wash or so or bar? Oh, I'll switch it up. Whatever's like comes to me. Whatever's like You're not using dove or irish spring or anything like that But dove isn't bad. Dove isn't bad at all. Okay, but no, I would probably yeah a body wash But that's yeah, that's actually a shower luffa Do you use perfume at all? No, no perfume. No, really? Okay. I'm a little sensitive towards it. Okay
Starting point is 01:09:09 In the last 365 days, have you said the phrase that's how they get you? No Do you have any fireworks at the house? No We take your shoes off at the house um, I Do most of the time, but I encourage my guests to not or to like that's the classiest response If I go over your house, you make me take your shoes off. I'm never coming back. No, no, no I would never do that to somebody. I always say, oh, don't worry about it. And if they want to I say, of course, but sure Okay, okay, and then you know guys have like socks and their holes in their socks. Yeah. Do you currently own any celebrity cookware?
Starting point is 01:09:43 Wolfgang puck this No, no, how do you feel about the rotisserie chicken? From like a grocery store. Yeah, they're good. Okay. I mean, I would buy it for my daughter Okay, but I would prefer to roast a chicken and um We roast that's the only thing I know how to cook or that's something my friend taught me how to do when I was That's a pretty classy dish. It's so easy. You don't have to do anything A couple of vegetables you put the vegetables you put your olive oil salt pepper rosemary
Starting point is 01:10:14 Put the lemon and garlic inside the thing next day. You make you make a chicken salad Yes, mayonnaise Dijon It's all you really need cut it up. Then the next day put that carcass in and make a soup That's kind of the self-sustaining economy. That's the weekend shabbat Goal, that's all right. Do you have any uh fresh herbs at the house? Men do you have like mint planted or basil planted or anything like that? No, that's a goal. Okay But you'll bring you'll use fresh. Yeah. Yeah if I'm making a chicken. I'll make sure to buy it
Starting point is 01:10:47 Okay, and you know in LA I kind of have don't have a lot of things growing because then it attracts animals Sure, and so smart. Have you ever ordered anything off qvc? Anything? Oh, give me a break No Really? I wasn't sure qvc. I don't know Has anyone in your family ever had any k jewelry? No, every kiss begins with k. Yeah, what are you talking about? I just picked up some items from k jones Some items Just the boxes
Starting point is 01:11:18 Do you have baking soda in your refrigerator? Three boxes. Yeah, I mean, I think we're good here. This is I mean, what do we do? We're making ourselves look like assholes Wait, is that classy? I thought she was gonna hit me that I asked her about qvc. Ever been in a cruise? No Hang on. I'm gonna get her. She's like a goddamn princess. I'm gonna get her. What are you talking about? Have you ever eaten a hard boiled egg in public? No, but is one of the things that uh one of the ways I try to give my daughter protein, so I'll put like um Hard boiled egg. I'll I'll buy them from the store and then slice it up and take out the egg yolk. She doesn't like that That's okay. She's a baby. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, that's all right. Um
Starting point is 01:11:58 You take your shoes off on the plane Sometimes yeah You got me you ever brush your teeth in the shower brush my teeth in the shower. Yeah, sure you do you pee in the shower? Yes, yeah, there we go. We got her. That's not enough. We got her She's got fucking French money on her. What are we talking about? This is crazy. This is I mean, she probably has gold bars in her bag What the fuck are we doing? Yeah, Krueger ain't on her All right, this studio is worth more money because she's in it
Starting point is 01:12:29 The property value's going out dude. I'm probably gonna business loan in You know that Tasha, why can't you say something? Do you ever eat fast food In and out that's it. That's that's the clan. That's clear. She god damn it I've had a seven-layer burrito before from Taco Bell As a goof I lost a bet Once He had chew today. What are you talking about? And you probably ate it with a fork and knife
Starting point is 01:13:00 Mine was only six layer too. I couldn't afford the cheese probably had your assistant cut it up for you Gang's brand new book the world deserves my children. Natasha was gerald everybody. Fantastic. What happens? I'm not garbage You're not you're what are you kidding me? Clancy's person I've ever met Are you kidding me? They should put you on money This is nuts. Yeah, forget about Charles With those sausage fingers get the kid on there. We are Congratulations on the book. This is all about motherhoods is all about your fertility all that kind of your whole journey with this Uh, yeah, so I had a kid, you know, I froze my eggs when I was 38
Starting point is 01:13:34 I had a kid at 43 and uh, I really encourage all the women out there to try to figure out a way to freeze your eggs before you're 38 because then you have two extra decades to Find the right guy and also earn some money and have a career and find yourself and uh, also Uh, I'm going on a tour. She's all over the roads all over. I'm going on a tour and it starts Well, when does this come out? Uh, monday Okay So wait, it's monday. Is monday the 21st monday would be the 21st. Yeah, so tonight. I will be in philadelphia the 21st Really go out and see her. Hold down. Come on. And then I'm going the next day the 22nd to nashville
Starting point is 01:14:15 And then the next day the 23rd to denver and then I will be in chicago on the 28th And then I'm retiring so come out and see me Gang we know most of you know netasha, but if you don't she's an absolute killer. You have to go and see her She's absolutely amazing. Congratulations on the new book. Thank you so much. We can't thank you enough for coming and sitting with us Kippy, what do you got for the folks out there guys? We're over the road We have some tickets left for the second show in boston second show in rhoda island, but they're going quick Get them why they're there come see us gang. We love you very much and we'll see you next week. Peace

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