Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - PATREON: Hard Feelings - Foleyville
Episode Date: October 4, 2022Here is an episode of Hard Feelings w/ Kippy & Foley from the Are You Garbage Patreon Page. Join the Patreon for weekly Hard Feelings and bonus episodes of Are You Garbage. Thanks for watching. Love y...ouse guys. PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage Live Shows: https://linktr.ee/AreYouGarbage
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Let's go. Come on.
Oh, so.
Fatty.
Fatty.
Fatty.
Fatty.
Fatty.
Fatty.
Fatty.
Fatty.
Fatty.
Fatty.
Fatty.
Fatty.
What's cooking?
Dang.
Welcome back to the hard mother fucking feelings.
I'm your host H Foley this week fucking taking the reins.
I'm driving the bus.
I'm making all the stops.
I'm going to blow him crazy down for all for everybody listening and or watching.
He was just going through Instagram to find out who won followed him and he ain't happy
about it.
Okay.
Next stop.
Psychoville.
And the fair is free.
How about that?
Kevin James Ryan sitting across the table from me.
What's up?
Kippy.
Hey gang.
Thanks for tuning in.
Motherfucking homie.
Fresh haircut.
You're looking spiffy.
You're looking sharp.
I mean you see me about 14 times after the fresh cut.
You got it yesterday.
Any other day before?
I bought it now.
I got it two days ago.
We've been together every single day since I've gotten a haircut.
I like your hair shorter.
There's older pictures going around with you and you look real 80s.
Okay.
It looks like you got a two pay.
Okay.
Looks weird.
All right.
Camera what the photo was but I like it like this.
I like it cut.
Yeah.
Like it's thin.
I tend to keep it shorter.
It's just when we get jammed up on a road and in the back and you miss those.
There's you know if I miss it by two weeks it's a tough.
At this point now long would be bad right.
Like if your hair was as long as mine.
Real bad.
Also hold on.
I got a lot of things to get to.
Keyboard teacher.
Give it up for Tebow McMuffin Toby McMullen ladies and gentlemen.
What's up dudes.
Fire away.
Baldi.
Pretty good.
Kids got my number today folks.
What do you got?
You got beef.
You were eyeball me before we hit the fun button.
I got a lot of stuff.
All right.
But this haircut business just raised this that I'd forgotten about.
I go to this place over there on 57th street to get my haircut outside of my neighborhood
because I've said multiple times I live in a predominately Dominican neighborhood and
they don't cut white people's hair normally.
I know that.
Pet go.
Go ahead.
They give it.
They give you like you know cool guy Dominican haircuts and I don't you know I'm not I can't
be walking out there with a fucking ginger strap and stuff all lined up with my points
cooking.
Chocolate.
Chocolate.
I can't walk out like that.
You got the Puerto Rican flag shape in the back of your head.
So I got to go to like regular regular a tat your neck real quick.
I got to go to like regular guy haircut.
You know not cool guy haircut.
I need regular white guy middle aged white guy.
I need a barber shop.
You know you need a barber shop around midtown.
That's where I go.
I used to work right around there.
So I would go to work and I found this place.
So what's your guy's name in there.
Russ.
I don't have a guy.
I jump around.
Well the state also to the staff after the quarantine flexible.
They're taking anybody.
Yeah.
They used to be one of those things you walk in there's like fucking 80 chairs like a
lot of time they were fucking burning and turning a lot actually got recognized last
time I was there.
This guy was cutting me up.
And the guy behind me goes he was done his cut and he comes he's a huge fan.
I got thanks.
The guy cut my hair was not impressed.
So I got the main guy.
You know there's a main guy sure guys change two or three times over the past three or
four years.
Right.
I always an owner.
I don't know if it's growing up our main guy was Alex shut up to Mr. Rudd Telly.
We used to that's I think we were just talking about this.
My family was Charlie's you go to Charlie's get your hair cut and then Charlie's spell
that Charlie Charlie as an element or there's an R in there.
He's a he's a dirt ball.
Yeah.
You got a Charlie's Charlie.
Charlie.
I would tell you that I grew up with a Charlie like proper.
He was called Charlie at six seven eight nine ten eight Charlie Kelly and they go where's
he tended bar now.
No no no good good smart kid athlete fucking stellar baseball player proper like through
college whatever OK and the one teacher was like going through roll call the first year
like junior high or whatever and he was like he was like Charlie Kelly and it was like
tell me what you want to be called or whatever.
I was like Charlie Kelly and he was like yeah it's Charlie and the guy was like 30 and I
can't call it.
I can't call an eighth grader Charlie like I don't he's like you got to be.
Over sixty yeah we know him young man but we were at Charlie's we were a Charlie's
organization and then Jim Charlie's brother defective defected and opened up his own shop
in my hometown with Jim and then well it was it was just local was Holland Barber.
That's where we went.
It was right there was right down next to the wall walk where you fucking grab a Sambo
on the way out.
So that's where we went but the main guy at this one has changed so the past two times
my first time with him was last time right with the main guy when I got recognized.
Follies cut in your hair.
That's pretty good.
It's a deep cut.
Shut up.
Shut up for the hosting Cleveland.
So we get so I get so it's that it's that guy right I was like maybe six weeks so I pushed
it too long right.
You know running around this goddamn country of ours and the guy I sit down and I was a
little wonky.
My don't grow in.
I got like like I said I multiple times I have like a baby doll's hair.
It's really thin.
It's not great.
It's like cutting the grass at your grandmother's house.
A lot of things you got to go around.
Sure.
It's a lot going.
It doesn't grow great.
Like even the side like where they're most of it's weeds where they spray me down with
the red X or whatever.
Well you got dandy line on your head dog shit.
He sits down and I'm stepping dog shit when you walk through Gimpy's yeah we got any more
you can squeeze out of this.
Okay.
Good.
So I sit down he starts doing like you know he's like not happy with what he's looking
at.
Right.
He's like like the back because I'm all it's I'm all wacky and he's like dude you're bald
man.
Now when he goes he goes where'd you get your haircut last I went here and he did it you
fucking did it because I'm like you he goes who did it and I had a family fucking you
did and he's like now he feels like an asshole and now I feel like an asshole I gotta quit
drink everyone's looking at him it's a fucking scene dude like I'm like he's like I must have
been a long time ago I'm like yeah yeah he's like you waited to come back like yeah fucking
I'm like hey fucking Edward shaky and let's fucking go zip me up will you get me the fuck
out of here cutting you with a weed whacker.
I feel the past few days that was that was an aside the past few days you have been in
Foleyville ask a bit okay and yesterday my wife got to see that proper first hand in
an all time Foleyville ask we recorded a podcast yesterday with Francis Ellis yeah and Julio
got a lot they too hot good looking guys they are kids they're really they are like the summer
us they're way better looking way more money they're really doing it those two cool guys
you can see you're happy about this story already I got my hand on the trigger go ahead do you
know where I'm going the what I was talking where do you think I was talking about two
different things we were talking about nine different things right we could but I don't I
think your perception of Nadine is wrong I could I'm just gonna say sure I thought she was mad
at you because you were kind of being very short the thing with the phone and the and the looking
for dinner I don't know I would you trying to say I was on her radar I got a she said something
to me what did she say what's wrong with him really dude see bone this is the conversation I
don't know about this also I was also this could be thick news Debo and I was there it's not and
I was also frustrated not for a short because the situation you were in another world you were mad
at you were I wasn't no I wasn't mad you were focused on something else and you guys were dealing
with dinner I was just slow in the conversation I was just oh you were having your own content dude
we're down there and he's like he's sitting there he's smoking a cig and me and Nadine are like
oh where do you want to go you know I was like I talked to Francis he's like yeah nowhere around
here there's no real great restaurant around here or whatever and uh what are you doing
I'm getting my water I'll have you know so about the fucking below this story wide open
so we're sitting then I'm like where do you want to go spotlight but me and Nadine are talking
right we're having a proper conversation about where we're going to go to dinner and there's
three of us in like a fucking triangle you know it just the two of you going to dinner
just the two of us going to dinner I was invited dude you were on another planet at this moment
it was really bad I don't think I really was to be honest with you the way the conversation
I thought we I thought you and I were having a kind I didn't realize that's I'm saying how
much of another planet you were on we were not having a conversation I thought I think you were
just checked out of the conversation that buddy no there was no cut to okay so go ahead uh we're
sitting there um and this is outrageous continue you seem to be having a lot of fun with it by the
way so we're sitting there and he goes uh I go we're me and Nadine are talking about where you
want to go to dinner we're like oh we can go wherever you know do you want to stay here do
you want to drive to Williamsburg whatever we were going to do you know pasta tacos whatever
and he you started talking about private school and taxes you go that's the thing with then you
got to pay the taxes and you got to roll in private school that is I was continuing the
conversation we were having with uh yeah he was no longer there that was I I even preface it with
like you know it's funny to think about yeah like even if you have the money to afford a place like
that no you didn't no you didn't I'm pretty sure I did okay you didn't okay um and then you also did
that I go what are you talking I was like what I had a really it because you were out there
uh-huh you are not happy with this that's not happy I just did that yeah I just uh I think you're
wrong okay fair enough all right well then then you started talking about people at a club out of
nowhere again when we were still talking about dinner and now you're off taxes you're off private
schools okay we started I go what are you talking about go yeah whatever we go back to talking about
what restaurant or where we're gonna go eat and you're like dad they came up to meet the club and
this and that you were also you then you were in another place okay um okay I don't know what you
want me to say I don't know I thought we could have a little fun with it that's all keep going um
well so let's see what this let's see what this ends I think that was I started with you and I
were on the same team and you were the bad guy in that situation okay because you were short with
the phone giving it to her because this was in the middle of you of you being literally in left
field so that's so that's what so I was the reason you were being short I wasn't sure when you were
like I don't want to look it up on the phone and then she asked me for my phone and you're like here
use mine she said I think we both thought your phone was dead what no her phone was dead okay
I don't think you're misremembering it I'm pretty sure her and I walked away like that guy's a bozo
sure because I'll give you that's the conversation we had in the car really
she goes what was he talking about I go I literally I go that's full that's throwing me
under the bus because you did know what I was talking about we were having a conversation upstairs
with Ellis seven minutes before that with other parties involved sure but it would have made
sense what was he talking about I would I would respond oh we were talking to Francis
yeah okay but that's not how okay sure of course obviously you didn't do that sold me out I mean
we I was having we were having fun with it you seem to be taking offense to it but I'm like offense
is the right word I would say I just remember you're defensive I remember I just remember it
differently and I would say the guy was having three different conversations with himself in a
conversation does it his memory might not be as crystal clear as you proceed I thought I was
talking to my friend the other two people in the conversation didn't know what you were talking
about and you were talking about three different things what does bird have to say nothing you're
an idiot but the bullshit you're an idiot you're a bozo I was just saying I think you've been in
Foleyville a lot that's what that's how this conversation started yeah and I used yesterday's
example of you it was like you know beautiful mind ask of like it seemed like there was a lot going
on up here I'm moving fast these days I'll give you that happening in reality that's what I want to
say the wheels were spit we're cooking up here I feel like I'm at the top of my game right now
and everywhere else in the real world wasn't really clicked it huh that's what I would that's my
assessment all right I could be wrong you're both rats tell you that right now I thought I thought
her and I were on the same team what do you mean team that in that I've explained this three times
to you yeah dude that was a half a second you know we it was very curt
curt say he was curt he was curt he would have been like what's the
did you end up going to do what I've known about the taxes and or the private school and or the
people at the club and or the third thing if you buy a nice piece of property out there in Brooklyn
you still got to fucking figure out with the maintenance fees and all this stuff it's it's a
racket out there to be honest with you where'd you end up going to dinner though