Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Reggie Conquest: Philly Trash
Episode Date: March 21, 2021Kippy and Foley are back with old pal Reggie Conquest! Reggie talks about going to prom with his sister - its a fun one! Thanks for listening. Tell a friend! Live Shows: https://linktr.ee/AYGLiveS...hows https://kushydreams.com PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage https://Stereo.com/kevinryan Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/foleygrams/ Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans?
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Welcome to another exciting edition of are you garbage the show where you find
out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash now
here are your hosts Kevin Ryan and H Foley hey everybody out there and
welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast this is are you garbage it's a
show we sit down with your favorite comedians who find out the group to be
classy or to just a big old piece of trash I'm your hostage totally coming at
you on a rainy afternoon post-St. Patrick's Day down here at Antutti's
basement I don't know what she got into last night but there is a police horse
in the living room oh god all right wow dicey as getting a bowl of cereal just
wanting I could tell you that they're never gonna stop matter he writes these
by himself folks I hear him when you do okay I wouldn't have approved that one
my co-host is coming at you from right next to me he has made some shady moves
over the last couple of days he's changed vehicles flying his girlfriend out
of the country there's been some wife my girlfriend staying huh gang he's my
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that's zany's Nashville folks gang speaking of breakout hits of the season
we could not be more excited to have our incredibly special guest here with us
today he's one of our oldest and dearest friends we started in Philly
together we've lived together we fucking slugged it out here in New York City
for years I always said he's the most naturally funny naturally talented one
out of the group problem is pretty much an idiot but it doesn't turn the lights
on any because the kids a fucking star he's doing absolutely fantastic he had a
huge part on insecure last season and everybody freaked out everybody loved
he's got a lot of big things coming up do me a favor give me a nice big round of
applause for our good friend Mr. Reggie. Yeah I was waiting for the talk like I
was like we get a little long in the intro I'm so used to getting yelled at
like from all the podcasts we used to do. We're the listener we had we used to
have a podcast of three of us along with Andrew Chavone and Tom Cassie was a
Center City College podcast two years two years we had about three listeners
still is pretty good. I remember we got it on iTunes and Reggie goes damn we're
on iTunes I'm telling you. They used to be like being a world star like world
star back in the day it felt like you made it. Being on iTunes I was like oh
shit. He's like Kev we're really on iTunes I'm like anybody can get on iTunes. You're
getting your ass beaten a parking lot. I made it. Oh man buddy thank you for coming in.
Thank you for having me man. We know most of it but what is the what is the
straight through origin story of Reggie Conquest. I started in Philly. I thought he was going to fuck this.
Walked in downstairs and I took the elevator up. I texted Kippy he said he said the fourth
floor and now we're here. Started at the Laf House now we're here. You're from West Philly right.
West Philly West Oakland area and yeah I started comedy in Philly. I used to go to the Raven
Lounge with you guys. Yeah. When you were born and shit like that when you were you want to start
Oh like back there. My dad brother sister mom and dad met dad was a bus driver at the time
and yeah we they made me. I don't know how to do myself. I'm sorry. How far you want me to go.
I knew this was going to happen. Everybody like that. Okay. Yeah I know I know. So yeah
it started in West Philly and I started comedy. I got five sisters and I got a one brother.
I don't I don't know. I don't know how far I love you. Oh it's so funny. Five sisters. Five sisters.
Is that on your dad's side or your mom's side or is it dad's side. Dad was getting busy. Right.
Huh. You're you're the only child between your mom and your dad. Yeah. Right. And your brother is
my brother is my mom's son. Not your not your dad. No my brother. My dad got all girls and me.
That's funny. He's like tall like your dad your brother. He's like a big dude like
I'm my dad's taller than me. Your dad's a bad look. I know he's crazy. Look you do that. His
Facebook picture haunts my dream for the folks out there. He's a retired Philadelphia police
officer. And I would not have wanted to done anything wrong. Dude I would. Yeah that would have
been a bad look. He's got some dudes up. He's still got it too. He's got the gray beard. I'm like
damn I hope he reminds me of Roy Jones Jr. a little bit. He's just like yeah like Scott fucking
he's got. I hope I get that like when I'm 60 you're not going to have it. You don't have it now.
You're not going to get it. I think I age into that though. Like he looks cool.
You're going to grow in. He looks cool at your age. Yeah you don't grow into being smooth.
You're not going to be able to pull off a pair of Stacy Adams the way he does. Yeah I know that's
the only thing I haven't got from him like that. He rocks like that style. That sweat. Yeah I dress
like a like a delivery. He dressed like an Uber driver. Yeah like I can't pull it off.
I really hope I age into that though. Odd buddy I think I don't think you're you're
just going to be this older. You're going to be 66 wearing fucking hoodies and shit.
Oh that's the worst. Old dudes trying to dress young is a tough look. I thought about that. How
trashy are like retirement homes going to look at in like 40 years when it's all. Everybody's in
woo wearing shit. Everybody got on Yeezy's. Sitting around in a Weezer t-shirt some 90 year old. Yeah
like my dad my dad looked cool as shit and even in his old pictures he had kids he had a house he
always was stocky and I'm just like I'm stocky up top of here. I'm good. There's an old picture of
you for when you first start. I think when you first started doing comedy you had that like
the tan blazer on. I think you look like you're wearing shoulder pads. You look like you're about
to start at linebacker and you're at the club. That's how I thought I had the dress when I first
started. Like said like said the entertainer like that's who I wanted to.
I thought I had to dress up to do stand up. If you look back at a lot of those pictures I'm guilty
of it too. What we thought we were supposed to look like as comedians. Yeah. Was atrocious. I think
I before my first show I think I Google what's a comedian. Ever the one with me in the suit and
the sweater. My hands were sticking out. I don't think I don't think anybody sitting here looks
good in the suit now. I with a decent cut. There's one cut from H&M that I look okay in.
I look horrible. You look like you belong in a casket. Yeah. I look bad in a suit. I look bad.
After two seconds the shirts. I look like a fat kid at the end of a wedding. Literally.
I should have a fucking cake on my face running around. I look like a Uber black driver.
Sorry I'm late. Come on. Hop in. Come on. Let's go. Like yeah. I look bad.
That's why I'm all about the non-tucking shirt with the suit. Yeah. That's up too. But that's
shit. That's like a fat kid wearing a shirt in a pool. Everybody knows what you're doing.
Just tuck your shirt in and keep it fucking moving. You're not. Everybody knows you're
fat. Especially your weddings when it comes down to take the jacket off. I can't. Just
dress shirt. My shirt. I can't not tuck my shirt in. Like my shirt has to be out at Rose Wedding.
My shirt was out. Yeah. I showed up with that flow shirt. It's like where's your suit jacket.
Dude he showed up like he was going into a fucking studio 56 or something.
Trying to pull off his dad's look. Yeah I am. I am. My dad can pull it off. No jacket. Jacket.
Because he yeah. Yeah. He's cool and in shape. You look like you work at a resort.
Speaking of Monroe's wedding. Remember that dude that was in the fucking Nike sweatsuit.
Dude that dude had no. There was like fucking 25 comics just sitting there crushing him.
Dude he had a matching Nike sweatsuit on and people were like posting up on him and shit.
I would imagine you've worn some some suspect clothing items to friends weddings and stuff.
I'm all black t-shirt. Like if I can wear a black t-shirt to everything I would.
What is the blazer. The old blazer look. No I'm with you. That's the t-shirt blazer.
Oh man. Magnum PI. Yeah. Miami Vice style. That's all they did was just wear t-shirt.
It's not. I get it. I've definitely tried to pull it off but you need the right jacket.
Otherwise you just look like a fat kid in a t-shirt with a suit jacket. You know what I mean.
It's a tough look. Dude I bought a suit recently. What do I have to wear a suit to.
I don't know. I had to wear a suit to something to a wedding. My cousin's wedding dude.
Fuck it. I ordered it. Fuck you. Got my measure. When you got to order your suit.
Dude I still look like shit. It was like three o'clock. It was midnight.
Just a mess. You got your tie undone in the car. That's an instant.
The last thing the last two weddings I went to it's been shirt and nice pair of shoes.
Oh dude that's trash. I got my pants. Let her know what she's missing out on.
I look so bad. I can't stand the formal. I just look bad. You got to have someone do it.
Like you can find a look that's cheap and relative and you look good and you feel comfortable in.
It's tough to do but you can do it. I don't know.
It's kind of like the guy from the men's wear. You're going to like the way you look. I guarantee it.
All of you look like valets when you put a suit on. I can look okay at best.
Full body suit was prom. That was the last time I think I wore it.
Well you know he's trashy because he go to the full body suit.
That was the last time. Full body suit. That was the last time I wore it.
It's a suit. Full body. That's it. All white.
It was long though. It was long. It was all white.
Three quarter length. That's a big black. The white three quarter length.
So trashy with the with the with the gold vest.
And the Hummer limo outside waiting. My dad had his new. We had a new.
My dad got his new. He had a new Ford Explorer 2009 pull up in that. Yes.
Did your dad drive you. No I drove. Nice. I was thinking about that the other day.
I drove to my prom too. I remember being such a big deal.
Like we got the car clean and all this stuff. You use the family car.
Yeah. The dog was in the back.
Wait you didn't you didn't rent a car like you didn't get a new car.
No. Rent a car for the prom. Yeah. That's what you're supposed to do.
I got a fucking Nissan Maximus sitting in the driveway.
No. Nuts. You took the took the shit out the car.
Cleaning up. It went to prom and a Nissan Max.
Yeah. Why is that garbage. You're supposed to rent a car.
You said you got your dad. No. No. But it was brand new.
Yeah. I'll give you this. You can't. You can't be taking like the like the gym bag out of the
back seat to put your fucking three of a prom date. Just move my dad's racquetball stuff.
Cigarette butts. You got to move. There's an empty bag of McDonald's in the back.
I think that's a white prom thing though. Like you guys don't do the.
We did limo. We always did like a big like you did limo.
He was driving it. Kippy you good.
Wait. So everybody got in the back. Yeah. It would be like a couple of my friends got DUIs
that night too. They all drove themselves as well. That seems like super old school driving
yourself to prom. That's yeah. I think that is that is that was like in the movies in like the
80s and like hey dad can I borrow the car like that kind of thing. The air is dead. Yeah. You got
to you got to fuck it. But dude also it dropped when we our age it was very like hip hop was like
those call you had to be in a nice car. Absolutely. So it was like you pull up and like a fucking
navigator prom was so packed. I had all apps. I had all apps go to prom. The block was everybody
was there. I came down to so fresh and so clean. Oh wait. You came down to a theme song. Oh my God.
Yes. Oh my God. Where in your house. I'm upstairs. You get dressed or whatever. Everybody's downstairs
with pictures and stuff like that. Getting married. This is even graduation. You're fucking
snow white. No this is every black person I know comes down to music. So you wait at
you wait at the top of the steps and they play your music and you come down the steps and then
people take pictures of you and then and then you go pick up the girl. Same thing. She's got music.
They got to start three days ahead of time. It's good. I never heard of it. Wait. So y'all didn't
come down to music. You don't want to come down. No we rented a limo and we would all this is bananas
dude. We would all meet at someone's house. My mom dropped us off on the way to the grocery store.
We would all meet at someone's house. Whoever had like a big nice house. Nice house. Yeah. Whoever
had the biggest nicest house that person wants to go to somebody's nice house on a special day
for pictures. It's not a special day. It's no it's promise serious. That when you got all
left and you're going to be doing it again next year. What did the senior prom three times.
I definitely had all of us somehow graduated a long time. I was a D student going on prom.
I feel like with the theme song dude. Have you got all left at least fly below the radar.
Another one bites the dust. My answer should hand me money.
Thanks. They're slipping you money too. They give you money. You get you get a little book.
It's great. It's a little book like the book the sign. Oh no that's the yearbook. I'm getting
it mixed up. But they give you they give you they give you prom money. Y'all don't. Yeah.
First of all they you get money though. I don't give you money. Not for prom. No. Maybe like
here's 20 bucks. In case you go to Burger King with 20 bucks. I had like 300 dollars.
300 bucks. And brand new. Reggie's Reggie's in the fucking auditorium making it rain.
Auditorium. Oh it was yours. Wait y'all's wasn't y'all. Y'all had your prime in the auditorium. No
no ours was at the Constitution Center in Philly. It was like oh yeah yeah same same yeah. I was
about to say auditorium. I was in the cafe. Jesus.
No. Our semiformal was was in the cafeteria. What the fuck is the semifinal.
Paulie's fucking slow dancing with a six next to a folded up lunch table.
Paulie's prom had a bowl of punch at it. Marie McFly was playing. Everybody's dancing.
Paulie's getting down on a Salisbury sink. Paulie's back at the refrigerator.
Everybody's on speed.
What. Dude you gotta you gotta come down. You never know what you're gonna get with Reggie.
Oh I love it. No I didn't know I didn't know prom money wasn't that wasn't a thing. No.
Prom money. An intro song was never a thing. Okay so let me where'd you go after prom. Like
did you do something the day after? The day after. The night after we would typically go to like a
house party or something. I think we might have went down the shore the one night. Like we went down
to went down to a buddy's room. Where'd you guys go Aruba? What the fuck is going on. I had hard
drugs getting out of my system. I needed some fucking rest. I ain't going anywhere. No we so we
went to IHOP first. Got kicked out. This is real shit. We went to IHOP in our prom shift.
After prom. Yeah. Go to IHOP. You fucking dork you didn't go to a party and get fucked up.
We went to a strip club. This is this is this is night on Broadway and Philly is very rinky
dink. You took your dates there. No our dates left and we went to a strip club and I had 300
dollars. Gotta spend it. Why didn't you go out with your date afterwards and hook up with her.
Well as a I went to a couple proms. I went to two I went to three proms. I went to one with my
sister. You what. Wait you went to a prom with your sister as a date. Yeah as a date and she was
a she was a she was in 12th. I was in 10th and then my then when I went I went with that's banana
dude that's fucking but do you went to the same school. Huh. You guys go to the same high school.
Yeah but I was like in like 10th grade. So you would have been in the school with her.
Yeah I was in the school with her but I was in like 10th grade. So I went to her.
You went to the prom with your sister. Yeah. Is that normal. What's going on. That's not
normal. That is normal. No it's not. Where in Utah. That's not normal. My sister is my friend.
I can go to the prom with my sister. You know you can't. I'm sorry. People do that all the time.
No. I guarantee you they do not. Did you both get your own entrance song or do they play too.
I don't think my sister is my game. You guys came out the fucking DX song.
My sister's prom was totally different from mine. My shit was turned up.
Yeah you ended up in IHOP with no broads. Sounds real turnt up.
So I went to one where I went all where I wore all black. She had a red dress on my sister.
And then I went. Buddy you can't be bragging about an all black dude when you went to prom with your
sister. It was the Met Gala. I'm opposed. I'm opposed to pictures of but I got the I got
the picture with all black. Buddy you went to the prom with your sister.
That was her prom. That wasn't mine. It wasn't mine. It wasn't my prom. She brought me to her
prom. Let me ask you this. You should have put your foot down itself. I'm not going to promise you.
It was fun. It was good. We had a good time. Why did she take her little bro.
Got my little worm wet. Got my little noodle suck. I didn't want to say it.
I thought of it four minutes ago. I was waiting for one of you to say it.
Try to elevate ourselves. I'm not trying to do that low brow comedy.
It took every fiber of my being. Not to say that. I was just shooting on the mic.
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Now back to the show.
Trying to shit on me. That's crazy. But the why did your sister take you with
Is that a black guy? Is that white? That's that's I think that's normal. I think it's not. No,
it's not. Nobody I've ever known. Listeners right in. Nobody I've ever known race, creed,
color doesn't matter. Went to a prom with their sister or brother. Okay, that's I know a couple
people to have. But she took me unless there was something wrong with one of them. They think
you were slow or something. No one's gonna ask Reggie. I'll take him. So I don't know. I don't
I don't know why. I don't know. I can't remember why I went. Maybe she didn't have a day or he
canceled on her or whatever. That's what it was. Somebody canceled on that makes sense. So that
that's normal. That's sweet. You stepped up and yeah. So I took I was in tip. Don't give him this.
If some dirt bag stood her up. Yeah. So yeah, he stood her up or she couldn't have a date or
something. But I went to her prom and then my senior year. No, this is fucking she's just a bitch.
Nobody wanted to fuck her. Right. He's a guy tagged me in wrong. I'm sorry.
Hello. So that was her prom and then my senior year. I took a date and then I graduated.
Can you breeze over that real quick? Was it your brother? No. No, it was it was a girl. I was dating
at the time. I took her and then I graduated and then the girl I was dating. Another girl I was
dating that was in 11th grade. That was a senior. I came back and went to her bro. That's that's
relatively normal in part two. Yeah. Coming back. I went through all. Do you remember the songs,
your intro songs? Hold on. Did you get an intro song when you took the girl when you went back?
Like when you were out of high school or is that just a one time thing? That was a one time thing.
Yeah. Because that I mean senior. Yeah, that was my you can't you can't have an entrance to a fucking
prom that you don't even go to my senior prom. Well, I had all these and I was graduating. I had
intro music. Everybody was there. All these giving me money. Now when I came back and took her,
it was her song. So yeah, you just laid low. I just laid low. Reggie was working at the high
school at the time. Lady bull. I see is Monday. I can't believe you guys don't never heard of that.
What? Taking a sibling on a no, never. Other than that situation. Yeah. I mean, that's like
something from a movie. Oh, I think that was on friends or something like that. I feel like
everybody didn't somebody stand up. Yeah, then Ross tried to jump in for like I know what the
fuck happens in France. Blackish. I had a serious conversation about friends. I'm like, what?
The King of Queens. Maybe I would have got it. I was that right in on King of Queens. Arthur went
to the prom. Oh, yeah. Shout out to King of Queens. Yeah, definitely does that little hour at night.
I get we're just King of Queens. I watch it every time. It's like white Martin.
It's like my white Martin. They tried to call a Seinfeld that like, no,
King of Queens is it for me? All right, we got to get to some questions here. I'll just recap
because you were incapable of doing it. So you were born and raised in West Philadelphia.
You're right. I don't know what the hell to say either.
Yeah, now we're here. I mean, there's an interesting backstory that your dad was married. He had an
affair. No, he was never married. Why are you here? You fucking dark.
He said it in the beginning. It's because he said he had an affair.
You got real fucking real Maury on it. I almost punched you.
He had an affair. What?
If you just said cheated, I'm like, all right, fine.
You said it in the beginning. I did not say a fair.
Did he step down or something? You're projecting.
I guarantee he said something about him and Sheila. I'm gonna die.
An affair. Jesus Christ. So he was an adulterer. Correct?
He was a womanizer. Correct? What? Oh God. I need a minute.
Oh, my head hurts.
Affair.
Oh God, I can't see straight.
Wow. All right. Dude, that just killed me. Dude, your reaction to him.
Affair really pissed me off.
He pissed me off. I'm sorry.
You don't talk like that.
Oh, okay.
Side piece cheated. I'm like, yeah, fair adultery to what?
I'm sorry.
So you've been in New York for three years?
I blacked out for a second. I thought I was going to pass out.
Okay. All right. Been in New York for what nine years?
Eight, seven, eight, nine. How long you been here?
I think seven. You and I have both been here. The three of us have been here for seven years.
You came up six months. I've been saying nine years.
I moved here in 2013. Yeah, so did we. We moved here on the same day.
Oh, okay. So in 2013, it's 2021. I've been saying nine years.
It'll be seven years in. No, it'll be eight years.
Because I'm seven years in. Oh, no, we came up in January.
That's what I'm saying. We came up before. Yeah, it came up six months.
Six months. Okay. That's a year.
All right. I apologize. I was trying to get some, I was trying to get them to have some sort of,
you know, backstory. We're fine.
Yeah. Yeah, I've been here seven years now.
You know, minus the pandemic, I ran back to Philly where it was safe.
Well, you were in LA for the first half of it. Yeah, I was in LA for the first half.
Sad as shit. I remember he called me and I was like, yes.
Wait, what? I was just saying, I started out in LA before the pandemic.
I was out in LA and then the pandemic happened. I was like, all right, I'm out of here.
Good shit. I don't want to be here. You went out there for work.
Yeah. It was a pressure situation.
Everything started shutting down. I'm like, I'm going to die in LA.
Oh, I was so happy to come back. Oh, man. I was scared as shit in LA, that airline.
Airport. Yes. Oh, and that was like in the beginning of it.
When everybody was just freaking out. I didn't even like people looking at me.
Well, when did you fly back from LA? Probably in March.
Oh, you did also, right? Oh, man. That was like the beginning. That was an
element. I wasn't there before. Getting that death tube.
So scared. We didn't know which way it was coming.
Either we had gloves on, masks on, fucking sunglasses.
We didn't know where it was going to get you.
Brutal. So yeah, I've been here. Me and Foley were roommates.
Oh, which by the way, for the, I don't know, I think we might have touched on this at some point.
He has, you went out, it's one of the funniest stories. You went out and bought all the food.
And then what was it? The Eggo waffles or the Texas toast or something?
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Waffles. Waffles. Yeah.
Red, you went out and bought a big thing. Eggo waffles and this maniac
opens up the box from the back. So in the freezer, it optically looks like the box is still sealed.
But for the whole week, he's been stealing waffles out of the back of the box.
And he flips it. So I remember. It's like a trap door.
We call that the back of the truck technique.
Dude. In the bins. I get all my food, you know, him and cotton.
It was cotton. It was cotton. And then a friend of ours whose, whose parents had the lease.
It was a one bedroom, by the way. There was nine motherfuckers living there.
We kind of muscled our way in there, took the place over,
fucking baked potatoes out of the microwave. Cotton's cabbage. Remember?
Dude, he literally, we had nothing. He seasoned that with salt and toothpaste and it was fucking
phenomenal. It was like, literally, there was nothing in it.
I remember answering like, is there butter in this? He's like, no, I'm like, is there egg?
Is there cheese? He's like, no. He just made some of the best cabbage ever.
But yeah, Foley Foley would eat a lot of my shit that I didn't really.
Hold on. For the record, you went to the store once and you got stuff for like a winter.
But I just remember you like two weeks later being like, all that was left was the waffles.
You're like, here we go. I'm going to have waffles every meal.
Pick the bag. There was one empty one left in a bag.
One waffle left in a clear bag. Probably fucking frostbitten shit.
I was so mad. I left the door open.
Oh man. That was, that place had a, I lost weight there because the pickings were so slim.
You know, it's bad. Usually, the roommate there would keep all his food in his room.
Yeah. Cause he knew if he put it in that liver room, it was over.
Oh man. It was like a grocery store in Belarus. It's like, it's fucking empty shells.
Little creatine powder. Oh my God.
Trying to find something in there late at night. Starvin was difficult.
Oh man. And that little, that little full town out there and your room,
you can hear everything in Foley's room, whatever he's watching, listening to.
I'm like, oh, Foley's home.
Ah, that was good times. All right. Let's get into some RU garbage questions.
Yeah. So you were in LA, you were here, and now you're, now you're living in Foley.
Back in, back in Foley. Right now. Okay.
That sucks.
Let's go over some stuff.
Let's do some of the basics.
Yeah. Let's do some of the basics from Jump Street.
What was the name of the street that you grew up on?
Felton.
Felton Street?
Felton Avenue.
Felton Street, yeah.
Felton Street.
Felton Street?
Felton.
We used to go get dimes down there in high school.
That was like Felton Street.
Felton Street, yeah. 322 North Felton Street.
Sounds like the nice part.
Okay.
Shit. All right.
What was the supermarket that Sheila would go to growing up?
Save a lot.
Save a lot.
Yeah.
I don't think I've ever been to one.
Well, there's a reason for that.
You don't live on Felton Street.
Or as we called it, Dimebag Alley.
Yeah. Save a lot.
It was a little market on the corner.
It was a little Asian market.
I forgot the name of it,
but we used to go in there and steal shit all the time.
Reggie's a big crook, by the way.
He's always, he's got sticky fingers.
Well, I stopped now.
I don't do it anymore.
Did Sheila ever...
Every time you walked into a 7-Eleven with Reggie,
came up with 15 things in your pocket.
I used to always warn you against it.
There's other comics that do it.
In the airport.
In the airport.
A lot of people steal from the airport, yeah.
I think I stole a pillow or two from the airport.
A neck pillow.
You never stole a neck pillow?
It's so easy to take one and just keep walking.
Reggie's like, I stole a sunglass hunt
on my way back from LA.
I've definitely taken a pillow from the airport.
Holy shit.
Just walk right by casually.
Keep it on.
You're getting on a flight with a massage chair.
Sir, you're gonna have to check that.
Right in the middle of the aisle.
Yeah, people do steal from the airport, but yeah.
I know. And I always said,
is that that's not something you want to get pinched for?
Then you got to deal with that.
No, but I always, when I did steal,
my old stealing spree, I took small stuff.
Candy bars, you know.
You ever got caught?
Not since I've been living in New York.
Yeah.
Yeah, so I always had a plan if I got caught.
You know what it is?
I always have the money, but it's something about just-
Oh, not always.
Well, yeah.
That made me think of a story.
One time we were at the 7-Eleven in the West Village.
It was real late at night.
Reggie was in there.
He had no money.
He was just keying the joke.
He was just circling.
And he happened to catch one of the cashiers.
They were changing out the donuts.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Remember?
And she was throwing them out.
Yeah.
Right in front, and she wouldn't give them a donut.
Yeah.
And he was in there pleading with her.
Uh-huh.
He was so mad.
I remember that 7-Eleven, when they're not paying attention,
I'm walking right out.
They always in there fighting with somebody.
At that place is a scene.
Yeah.
I would go to the register.
I'd look.
I'd go, all right.
I tried.
Yeah.
I was bummed that Mickey these clothes.
I used to hit that place all the time.
That place was always too dirty for me.
Oh.
What?
That was never one.
I wanted to be low-brow.
No, what is it, please?
Put the cashiers and stuff.
Oh, yeah.
They always did have hot cashiers in there.
They were dudes.
Yeah.
I think they were always gay dudes,
is what he was referring to.
Yeah.
OK.
That place was a scene in there.
It was.
During the day, it was normal.
It was nice.
Who's going to that McDonald's?
Yeah, I'm not going to go on a date.
Don't fuck.
I think they opened at midnight.
I was working at the Bear Burger around the street,
so I did.
Every time I see Paulie in the village,
I'm like, he's getting in some shit.
When we were roommates, we'd just be walking.
Paulie, we don't know.
No, I'm out here.
It's like 3 in the morning.
All right, man.
I'm going home.
I'll catch up to you.
It's an hour away.
The train comes every half an hour.
The one night, he gave me cash from his waiting tables job.
He had like fucking 300 bucks on him.
Or he had like 300 and let's say 60 bucks.
So he takes 60 bucks and keeps it in his pocket.
He goes, Kippy, hold this 300 under no circumstances.
Do you give me this 300 bucks?
I go, all right, man.
And I'm not even joking.
12 minutes later, he goes, give me the fucking money, dude.
He's like, I'm fucking serious.
I need it right now.
Give me the fucking money.
I'm like, OK, this was fun.
That was at Niagara.
Yeah, I get those IPAs in me.
Ooh, man.
Oh, Niagara, I remember that.
Man, we used to get fucked up in there.
I got kicked out of there.
It was like $1 for 40 beers for like two years or something.
Wait, what was that other one across the street from Atlanta
that I got kicked out of?
Grizzly Pear?
No, 206.
206, oh, that one.
You were in the bathroom with some girl, that woman.
During the show.
It banned me from it.
Well, dude, first of all, the fucking,
the bathroom was smaller than an airplane bathroom.
It was in the showroom.
And Reggie had his biggest, is in there with a girl that
was bigger.
They were fucking stuck.
They had to get an engineer to get them out of there.
Your friend, your friend's in the bathroom.
That's what the fucking, that owner was saying.
Put that little latch on the door.
Yeah, it was like a hook block.
You can open it halfway and see it.
You can open it halfway and see it.
She was like, hey, you never come back.
You're done.
You never walked in here.
I was like, all right, bitch.
Never bought anything in this dump anyway.
Oh, man.
Oh, OK.
Let's center ourselves a bit here.
Let's get focused here.
All right.
I have some, I have some random questions I'd like to know.
Do you like any of the following smells?
Fresh asphalt.
What is it?
Fresh asphalt.
Reggie's immune to RU garbage.
I can't tell if he's a genius or an idiot.
He's deflected every one of our questions.
I haven't looked at anything.
He doesn't understand one question.
I feel like I'm talking to Mr. Bean over here.
Fucking Peter Sellers.
All right.
What's the next one?
Have you ever gone to prom with your sister?
Garbage.
That's garbage?
It's not classy.
What'd you get on your SATs?
Oh.
What?
What didn't I?
Barbecue sauce.
Did you?
I literally did that.
Dude, I did A, B, A, C, and then you go back to it and it's just a stretch.
Abacadabra all the way down.
What?
Yeah.
That's literally all I did.
I literally remember like the last portion of it just being like,
fuck this.
Man, my friend was trying to race us so you could be finished.
I tried to leave early to like, no, you can't.
You at least have to stay here 20 minutes.
Act like you're taking the test.
You're still running.
Oh, my fucking head hurts, dude.
I got a cab outside, lady.
I got to pick up my prom out, big bitch.
I got to do my choreography for my intro.
What SAT?
You guys remember that?
Yeah.
1140.
870.
This is the scientist over here.
Do you remember yours, Toby?
Dude, like 980.
Mine was probably like a seven-something.
Don't you get like 800 points for signing your name?
Probably.
That's what they say.
Is that real?
No, I don't think so.
Yeah, I don't think it's real.
If it is, I fucked that up.
H. Schmoley.
Growing up, would you drink milk with dinner?
Absolutely not.
Yeah.
Really?
Absolutely not.
I think that's a white thing.
That is.
Yeah.
Did you have that?
That's so white.
When would you have milk?
With cereal.
That's it?
Look how mad it got.
They got more mad than the adulterer.
With cereal, you fucking idiot!
I had a big glass today before I came.
Yeah, because you're a fucking lunatic.
With milk, I can't even drink milk anymore.
I'm done.
Why?
My body just doesn't take it well.
Your tummy.
My tummy, I'd start shitting.
It sounds like that's the milk.
You try like oat milk or something?
I'm on oat milk.
That's all I drink now.
That's pretty classy.
That is pretty classy.
He's, you're definitely,
you've done a lot of improvements to yourself.
Oh, yeah.
Last couple years.
You lost a lot of weight.
You're very focused on your career.
Well, you know, I would say your class,
like, do you think you're garbage?
I have my garbage moments.
We just talked about how he stole from 7-Eleven
every time he's in there.
I mean, yeah.
I haven't been to a 7-Eleven in a while,
but I definitely have my garbage.
But I'll go back and steal if I need to.
Please, but you're definitely working on it.
Yeah, oh yeah.
The thing is, yeah, of course, you're very,
you're influenced by, like, you'll see something
that you didn't know, like,
like somebody do something and you go,
oh, I'll do that.
Like, for a while, you were like drinking red wine
or whatever, you know what I mean?
You do, yeah.
He sees somebody do something and he goes,
oh, I'll do that.
Like, yeah.
And it's like a classy thing.
That's classy, that's classy.
Yeah, I mean, it's no 2% milk, but...
What's this avocado toast everyone's talking about?
Oh, I'm on it.
See?
Yeah.
Yeah, he's finished it and he's like,
oh, I'm going to do that.
I try, I do try more different, like, way more...
Oh, man, do you remember the first time
we took you, when you came to get sushi?
As there was, like, 11 of them.
Oh, yeah, at that bar.
It was like a conveyor belt, right?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, and at that time, I was not...
Dude, this was like, dude, this was, like,
fucking 2014 rich.
You got to make a split decision on those things, though.
It's coming quick.
What the fuck?
I know you put your back.
We left and got chicken fingers.
I was so mad, yeah, they all was like,
let's get sushi.
I wasn't eating sushi like that.
Yeah, he was all like, yeah, dude.
And then he took one bite and his face,
dude, he turned into a baby.
His face was like, I've had enough of these Japanese nuggets.
And me and you went to get chicken fingers.
We went to get chicken fingers,
because I don't fuck with sushi.
I do remember that.
He registered now,
friend of a fucking McDonald's.
Eating fucking 16.
We went to a diner right there in the street
and got chicken fingers and fries.
Everybody's eating sushi.
But yeah, at that time, I did not fuck with sushi.
But he was so gu...
I think it was your idea.
It was like 15 of us wanted to get sushi.
He took one bite and was like, I don't like this.
Yeah, do you now.
Now you like it, though.
I'll fuck it up, man.
I love it, man.
Like tuna and salmon and all that kind of stuff.
Yeah, I still don't fuck with crab.
I love crab.
I like crab better than lobster.
You mean that you're talking about the California rolls,
the imitation crab?
The crab period.
I don't fuck with that.
You don't like crab?
No, man.
Why?
I don't know.
I just don't like the taste.
What about lobster?
Lobster didn't mean...
Shrimp?
No.
Shrimp I can eat now.
I used to couldn't eat shrimp.
Because of the texture.
I just...
I don't know why.
Couldn't catch them.
Yo, everybody...
Slipping a little bit.
My family loves crab.
I'm like, mom...
Crab's fantastic.
Fantastic.
Maybe one of my favorite things.
I've never heard anybody that doesn't like crab
unless they have a shellfish allergy.
I used to lie and say I had a shellfish allergy.
I say that, and I'm like, I'm allergic to mayo
or whatever I don't like.
Yeah.
I'm like, yeah, don't put tomatoes on my sandwich.
I'm allergic.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I used to say that for years,
but I just never liked it.
Wait a minute.
Say it anywhere, not even in a restaurant.
I'm allergic to crab.
But we're not kids.
Sir, this is the dental office.
Uh-oh.
All right.
We touched on a little bit.
Do you currently have a suit that fits you?
Like a full body suit, as you would call it.
I don't own a suit.
You don't own a suit?
No, you guys own a suit?
I own a couple, yeah.
You?
I mean, I bought it a couple of months ago.
There's no way it fits.
Yeah, if I have to go...
If I had to wear a suit, I gotta go buy it the next day.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I gotta give them.
Yeah.
You got a suit told you?
I always get hemmed up with those.
Yeah, damn.
Do you have any pairs of dress shoes do you own?
One.
Are they the ones I gave you like five years ago?
Dude, I used to give him all my old shit.
And that was like, it was a badge.
If you were taking my hand me down this five years ago,
you were a badge.
Oh, we were taking them.
Everybody was taking them.
Yeah, I remember Nicole Foley gave me this black jacket.
He gave me one.
It was $4,000.
That's like my burning jacket.
Yeah.
Whatever happened to that?
I don't...
Well, it was $300 suit stitched together.
Yeah.
I got a picture of it in it where I'm wearing like,
it's like a photo and that was this jacket.
I got used to wearing it a little bit.
Yeah.
This smooth black jacket.
Yeah, it was sweet.
It was about $400.
My brother got it at Barney's.
Maybe like 2002.
It couldn't fit him and he still was like,
where's my jacket?
You can't fit it.
That's sentimental values, my brothers.
Well, you sold it for $8.
So it couldn't have been that sentimental.
No, I gave it to him.
Or I think it was a trade off for the waffles.
I don't know.
We used to wear each other's clothes all the time.
When I lost the weight,
when I first lost like a bunch of weight,
everybody was still fat.
And you guys, it was like a yard sale, dude.
It was like a beginning of coming to America.
I didn't wear my kippy robes.
Every time I showed up to a show,
someone was into my jacket, my pants, my shoes.
Anytime someone had a job interview,
I had to like outfit the wish it.
I think I got a pair of slacks at the house.
Dude, we were a hot mess.
Oh my God.
We were a hot mess for a couple of years.
Your whole crew was just all seven of you
were one successful comedian.
Yeah.
It was every do we had to fucking team up.
And like everybody, it was hand me downs.
Yeah.
We were grown men.
Yeah.
It'd be like, yo, I got a job interview.
What size shoe are you or whatever?
I need a dress shirt.
Oh, man.
Full circle, man.
Full circle.
And look at this now.
All right.
Have you ever hit one of the punching bag machines at a bar?
Absolutely.
Those shits are fun.
That's trash.
Have you ever eat cocktail fruit at the bar
just out of the thing?
Cocktail.
Oh, like a lime orange.
Oranges or whatever.
Yeah, yeah.
The oranges are always good at the bar for some reason.
You bite it off and then drop the pill back in the drink.
Anyone in your family ever been interviewed
on the local news?
No, no, no.
Well, I feel like somebody would.
Being on the local news used to be the shit, though.
Yeah, dude.
Yeah, you would have to like, you would tell people.
Like, hey, turn it to 6 o'clock news.
I'm going to be on.
Yeah, and then you see us in the back dancing.
Have you ever been a member of a studio audience?
I was with you.
Yeah.
That just came up.
They were, they were Dave and Monroe or Dave and Derek
were playing that on the show.
Oh, yeah.
What'd you see?
The Meredith Vieira show when Yamanica was on.
We met Lance Bass.
We did.
Yeah.
We were hyped to meet Lance Bass.
Oh, dude.
I literally saw him and Yamanica's like.
All wearing each other's clothes.
That's back when I was trying to wear button-ups, too.
Like, I was trying to wear, get into that one.
You had one red plaid shirt.
I'll never forget.
Every Instagram picture you're wearing.
I'll never forget when you were like trying to, like,
better yourself.
I was.
I was.
It was the summer.
We were standing out in front of the lantern
and you had gone out and bought a new short sleeve button-down.
There's a pic.
It's in my Facebook photos.
It is.
It is.
Yeah.
And you, dude, you had gotten like a haircut.
And you pulled, you got out of a cab for some reason.
I don't know what this was.
You just took your new shirt for a ride.
But you, you got out of a cab across the street
and I could tell by the way you got out
that you knew you were about to get destroyed.
You had no confidence.
I think that was all Monroe influence too.
Like I would try to do the sneakers like there.
Yeah.
You're just a button-up shirt.
Try to keep clean.
And then y'all would just destroy me.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We're over there wearing fucking potato sacks.
It's like fucking Day of the Dead.
That's why I still don't have confidence in the button-up.
I'm like, I'm looking at it.
I'm not even in real comics.
I'm like, oh.
My wife will be like, why don't you try this?
Dude, I wore a gray shirt the other day
and he was like, what are you doing?
Dude, I don't think I'm ever wearing like real pants again.
Yeah, me neither.
These things keep working out.
I'm just sweatpants when I wear them.
I just made some good money on these sweatpants.
I got a great-
Dude, they're the best.
What brand are they?
They didn't, like-
I got them from Dick's.
Supporting good.
I had to clarify.
Supporting good.
Yeah.
Okay.
Have you ever almost fought your dad?
Absolutely not.
Yeah, he can't fucking tune you up.
Yeah, my dad.
I'm still scared of my dad.
I got one for all three of you.
In the last 365 days, have you jumped the turnstile?
I have.
Yeah, you were big on that.
Yeah.
What?
No.
Couldn't fit.
Yeah.
He's got to go through the door anyway.
You know, if you've seen somebody walk through the door,
I don't always jump it.
I'll wait until somebody walks through the door.
I never did it.
I never did it.
Yeah.
Because I think when I was up here,
up here early,
they always jump on that shit.
Schaener got busted for it.
Yeah.
Ryan Schaener.
Schaener would.
He got busted.
He was up here for like two hours.
He was immediately in handcuffs.
He was immediately in handcuffs.
And they took him.
They took him down.
Really?
Oh, if I seen that, I would have been stopped.
But when three, like, since Corona,
I'll look at the person like,
it's Corona.
I'm not paying for this shit.
Not paying to get sick.
That's just open sanitized.
I'll look.
And it's like, they don't even care.
They know.
They understand.
They're just going down and grabbing candy bar up here.
Hey, you might as well buzz that door,
because I ain't swiping.
And, granted, I haven't been down here that much,
but the times I come, I don't pay for shit.
That's funny.
I remember one time Cotton and I were coming back
from somewhere towards Northeast Philly,
because we were taking the bus.
We were, like, editing something with the guys
that we were working with.
And Cotton's bus pass had, like, expired at midnight.
And it was, like, 12.15.
Oh, man.
And it's just a bunch of people going to, like,
third shift, late shift.
And for some reason, this bus driver
was just being a fucking dick.
And Cotton would not move.
And he told me, he's, like, don't you fucking dare
go up there and put money in there.
And we sat there for, like, 20 minutes
and the guy finally just broke.
And he's, like, fucking just pulled out with us.
That happened at a mega bus with me, Cotton, Dave.
I didn't have a ticket, but I wanted to leave when they left.
And we went down and, like, yo, they might not let you on.
You ain't got a ticket.
I had, it was too late.
And the bus driver's collecting tickets.
I snuck behind him and got him.
The bus was full.
And this lady comes, like, I got to get to work in the morning.
I got to come on.
Like, and the bus driver comes on.
He's counting.
He's looking.
And I'm sitting there, like, and his lady is poor ladies out
there, like, crying.
And I got to get to work.
And I'm like, bitch, I got to get to Philly.
Like, I just, I was so scared to be left in New York
because that was, like, one of my first times visiting.
So scary.
So I was like, hey, you guys, ain't nothing I could do.
That megabus.
It wasn't like we were coming up here as human beings.
It's like we were coming up here as, like, you know,
like gladiators or something like that.
You know what I mean?
Like, we were being, like, shipped in and, like,
scallaging through the village.
Shit was the scariest shit coming up from the megabus.
And then trying to get back.
Yeah.
They dropped it over by the fucking river.
That's fucking shady as shit over there.
On, like, fucking 18th Avenue or whatever's out there.
It's fucking icy.
None of the lights.
It's always nighttime over there.
Yeah.
Just one full awful card.
Dude, that, the bathroom on a megabus is tough.
Man, dude.
If you don't know what the megabus is,
it's a bus service that runs up there.
I think it's an, I think it's an international company.
Oh, really?
It's like, if you don't know what American Airlines is.
Oh, yeah.
It's funny to think of a megabus being international.
Canada, I think, for sure.
It definitely goes to Canada.
I caught it.
Did you take the megabus up to JFL?
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
If that's not the most Reggie Conquest thing in the world.
Probably snuck onto that, too.
Yeah, no, no, no.
Uh, I went mid and I caught it at the latest bus,
a 12-hour ride, and just slept through the night.
Woke up, went to Montreal.
It's good, Jason.
Definitely caught that bus to Montreal.
Alrighty, what do we got, Kippy?
Where are we at?
Um, I don't need to.
I'm still, I'm so disoriented.
My head hurts from laughing.
Um, let's do a couple more, and then we'll get out of here.
Uh, growing up, was it bagel bites or pizza rolls?
Pizza rolls all day.
Interesting.
Still?
I still, I still fuck up some pizza rolls.
Squeeze the top.
Squeeze the juice out.
Yeah.
A little cold part in the center of your mouth.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I still fuck up some pizza rolls.
Shabby.
Nah.
Bagel bites all day.
T-Bone, what were you, pizza, pizza rolls or bagel bites?
Bagel bites, baby.
Yeah, like a fucking gentleman.
Totinos.
If we got them, we were never getting,
we were never getting pizza bagels.
If we had pizza bagels, we were making them ourselves,
and we used to make English muffin pizzas
with American cheese.
Dude, there is nothing worse than a homemade pizza bagel.
Oh, man, dude, shit, bro.
They used to put cheese on English muffins in high school.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And, and yeah, it was a, it was a frozen bagel
with a little bit of pasta salt, or ketchup,
and then a slice of American cheese.
And then the American cheese wasn't fully melted,
so it was still in a square, and like, the fuck is this shit?
Yeah.
It's just like, one day we'll get real lunchables.
Pizza rolls all day.
Oh.
Hang on, this has been a big one lately.
Domino's or Pizza Hut?
Pizza Hut.
Really?
Yeah.
Pizza Hut.
For delivery now.
Well, Pizza Hut's, they're done now.
Yeah, they're, they're not a lot of them.
I don't know what's going on with them.
But Pizza Hut.
You're going Domino's now.
Yeah, I went up.
I've never like, but Pizza Hut was, was a shit.
Back in the day.
Yeah, they didn't have the solid bar and stuff you give them.
There was always, yeah, with chocolate pudding on them.
Yeah, it was great.
It was great.
The pizza all day.
Ain't nothing wrong with it.
Have you ever worn Axe body spray?
Yeah.
Dorn the high school football days.
Stinking up the place.
Yeah.
Right after practice.
Did you ever go to a high school football game after you graduated?
Yeah.
That was a thing.
Would you like, kind of, try to flex on the other team a little bit too?
You go there like you, like you're the Hall of Fame.
Ladies and gentlemen, please rise and welcome.
You show up like you're in the Hall of Fame.
Third year senior.
Did you wear your letterman jacket?
Huh?
I wore my jersey to go to the game after you graduated.
Yeah.
Yep.
Thanksgiving game.
I wonder you struck out on Cromya nerd.
What the fuck?
Dude, that's horrible.
Man, dude, that's cringe worthy.
Roll me cattle.
You got to show up.
Look at the young guys.
You'll never be the one.
Young guys.
You're six months older than them.
You show up like you're in the Hall of Fame, like you're in Canton.
Coach, can I talk to you?
It's a new coach.
He's like, get the fuck out of here.
Coach, I think, let me try to inspire the kids today.
You got a walker and sunglasses on.
They didn't let us on the side.
I remember pissed.
What do you mean I can't stand on the side?
You're leaning on the fence.
Trying to get close.
Hitting on the cheerleaders.
We were so mad they didn't let us on the field with the team.
Absolutely.
Oh, God.
Same thing.
Don't make me put the pads on.
Empty threats.
Hey, Rev, let them boys play.
Hey, that's a bad call, Rev.
All right.
That's fucking trash.
All right.
Let's do one or two from Patreon here.
Guys, when you sign up for Patreon,
we will ask your garbage questions.
It's just the best way to do it.
So if you want to get involved,
you can sign up patreon.com.
So I'll show you garbage.
This is for Mark.
Do you or anyone in your media family have a butterfly tattoo?
No.
No, no butterfly tattoos.
OK.
Did they call them tramp stamps?
No, a butterfly can be a tramp stamps here.
Oh, OK, OK.
Like above your ass crap.
Oh, OK, OK.
Yeah, nobody I know has a butterfly.
Because you got a couple of bad ones.
I got one.
Oh, I got two.
Yeah, I got two.
A cross.
What is it?
A cross.
We have that tree, too.
Yeah, tree cross.
That's a tree cross.
Oh, yeah.
Remember, I forgot about that.
I hate this tattoo.
That thing is no bueno.
It's so stupid.
It's a tree cross.
I try to get something religious.
Try so my mom wouldn't freak out.
But I never got it finished.
And she didn't know what it was.
So she's still beating you.
No, Mark, that's a tree cross.
Sheila tuned you up for that one?
Oh, yeah.
She told me up for that.
And my dad.
Because I was at a tattoo party.
And I got it.
Oh, that's right.
Yeah.
Jesus.
Yeah.
He lived a different life than H. Foley.
Tattoo party.
You went to prom and did drugs at whatever.
I wouldn't let somebody stick me with a needle.
I'd do that myself.
What are you going to have?
What are you going to get?
Mass tattoos.
All right, last one.
This is from Chris.
When you replace a toilet paper roll,
do you put the new roll on the dispenser
or just leave it next to the toilet
or on the windowsill or some on the bathtub?
Or do you proper replace it?
Well, our roll, we got the lift up thing.
So you can just slide the toilet paper on.
So you know how it's like a bar, right?
And you lift it up and it goes right on.
I know what he's talking about.
Easy as shit ever.
It's way quicker.
It's a stand by itself.
Yeah, it's a stand.
Like you hit it up, boom.
Toilet paper, boom.
It's not that squeeze.
I don't even know what that is.
It's not that squeeze.
If I got to squeeze with two hands and put it on,
it's not going on.
That's crazy.
The bathroom here goes under.
And it's like just like system.
And like the weight of the toilet paper,
all you do.
Yeah, it's tough.
You're pulling out 45 little ones.
Yeah, it's like.
And I need a, I need a handful.
Just use the first pass.
No, yeah, our toilet paper thing,
you lift that thing up, boom.
Put it on there.
Damn, that's pretty fancy.
I gotta get one of them.
It's way better.
I don't even, I've never even heard of it.
He's a classy kid, man.
He's trying.
I'll give him that.
He's trying.
He also didn't go to prom with his sister.
That's, I can't, I can't let that happen.
I guarantee you people going to the prom with their family.
They're not admitting.
No, dude, that's insane.
If they got stood up.
It's a date.
If they was something.
It's a date.
It stood up.
It's not a date.
It's not a date.
I mean, I don't know what, dude.
It's a date.
Did you hang out with her that night?
Like in like slow dance with her and all that?
No.
I don't remember all that.
I'm not saying anything happened.
No, I didn't slow dance with her.
She had her, she was hanging with her friends or whatever.
I was at a 12th grade prom.
So I didn't really know anybody.
I was in 10th grade.
So what the fuck were you?
Well, sister's a loser.
Okay.
At the end of the day, that's what it is.
She was hanging out with the chess club.
Oh God.
All right.
That's it.
Incredible episode.
Reggie, is there anything you want the folks out there to know?
Do you have coming up or?
Social media, whatever you want.
Social media, regs, conquest.
Some stuff coming out.
Stay tuned.
Cool.
Kid's going to be a big star, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm going to be a big star.
Come on, come on.
Love you guys.
Thank you for having me.
Of course, buddy.
Thank you for coming in.
It's very fun.
Kippy, what do you got for him?
Guys, as always, please make sure you rate,
review, subscribe on iTunes.
Full video available on YouTube.
You can subscribe there as well, then patreon.com.
Get a bonus content, premium content,
all the good stuff.
And then, guys, Nashville and Raleigh, North Carolina,
will be coming down at the end of April the 20th and 21st.
Get your fucking tickets, baby.
Get your tickets, gang.
Tell me you're opening.
Get a group of friends.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, damn, yeah.
I'm trying to show support.
Oh, yeah, good.
Fuck.
Pussy.
My mom lives in North Carolina now.
Tell Sheila to come on out.
Hey, hey, keep it up, man.
That's good for you, man.
Fucking pussy.
Oh, that's good you're getting reps.
Yeah, guys, so get some friends.
If you're listening, you're in the area.
Get some friends.
Come out.
Hang out.
You'll be able to ask us questions.
We're going to be taking your questions.
We'll ask whatever.
It's going to be fun.
It's going to be a good time.
We're going to be playing AYG with you guys.
Yeah.
We love you guys, and we'll see you next week.
Peace.
Peace.
Hang on there, cowboys and cowgirls,
before you go wandering off to the range there.
Want to talk to you real quick?
Just one more time about the fun we're having
on the Stereo app.
They have amazing shows, not just ours.
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it's a good time for us.
We look forward to it.
We'll see you there.
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We get to wet our beaks and we'll see you there.
Peace.