Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Sean Donnelly: Irish Trash
Episode Date: February 1, 2021Kippy and Foley are joined by returning guest, and old pal, Sean Donnelly! The boys answer listener questions and talk, boozing, trash food, and trash cars. Its a fun one! Bonus Episodes: https://ww...w.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage https://stereo.com/kevinryan T-Shirts: https://www.PodcastMerch.com Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/foleygrams/ Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans? You're Trash.
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Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage?
The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash.
Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.
Put your fucking seatbelts on, we're putting it in first gear.
Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast.
This is Are You Garbage? God damn it!
It's a show where we sit down with your favorite comedians and find out if they go classy or if they're absolute trash.
I'm your host H. Foley coming at you on a beautiful day.
Down here, Chili Day and Tooties Basement.
She's out bowling, which I've learned is code for stealing Amazon packages.
So, might be a couple of new neck pillows or cutting boards floating around the studio.
I like it.
Thank you buddy.
My co-host is coming at you from right next to me.
The most positive thing I think he's ever said to me.
He said he liked it.
This guy, I'm all warm and fuzzy.
He's the fucking CEO of Are You Garbage.
He keeps us one step ahead of the federal investigative units.
Kevin James Ryan everybody.
Go in his name!
Make sure Donnelly's not wearing a wire.
You know what I mean?
What's up everybody?
Thanks for tuning in.
As always, please make sure you rate, review, subscribe on iTunes Top 200.
That ain't too shabby.
Full HD video available on YouTube.
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And also patreon.com.
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You get bonus episodes.
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shitting on each other, airing some grievances.
A little bit behind the curtain.
And then, for the top tier members, we play AYG with you guys every month in a live stream.
You ask us questions.
We have two questions.
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Kind of.
We give away hoodies.
Do you send those hoodies?
None have been sent yet, but they will be sent.
Goodness.
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That's Are You Garbage, guys.
Sign up today, gang.
We love you.
And a nice shout out to our producer extraordinaire, T-Bone.
He is the magic man.
He makes it all.
It makes us all look pretty on here.
The Pride of Chicago comedy scene.
We call him T-Bone, but his mama named him Toby McMullen.
Hey, what up, boys?
Got a hot one.
We got a hot one.
T-Bone got a new mic stand over there.
Spending a little cash on T-Bone.
New mic stand, new mic.
Saving money from Shitty Jokes.
And gang, we could not be more excited to have an incredibly special guest here with
us today.
It's a fucking family up.
So we're reading your questions right here on the air.
We could not be more happy to have our friend here with us today.
If you haven't seen this episode, go back and check it the fuck out.
I think it was our first original.
One of our first.
One of our first.
I think so.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
Our backs were to the camera.
We didn't have T-Bone back then.
We didn't have T-Bone money back then.
You know what I mean?
We still don't have T-Bone money for the S-T-Bone.
T-Bone doesn't have T-Bone money.
He's still waiting on his hoodie.
He had Sirloin money.
You sure do.
Gang, he's the host of Celebrate on Sirius XM.
Do me a favor.
Give me a nice big round of applause for our good pal.
A member of the family here.
Sean Donnelly, everybody.
Yes.
Fading the way into nothing over there.
Stealing Amazon packages.
I talk about Trish.
Holy shit.
How much do you want to arrest?
I want to citizens arrest those people when I see that happen.
I don't mind it though.
Those are my favorite videos.
The Ring Doorbell videos where they catch dirtbags stealing the packages.
You like them getting away with it?
No.
Or you like them being caught?
Yeah.
The one lady that broke her leg.
That was great.
And this fat guy comes out.
He's wearing like a fucking...
That's why you liked it.
You go, Betty.
Even better.
The guy who made the contraption.
You ever see the guy who makes the contraption and they steal the contraption.
And then the alarm goes off and the glitter sticks all over him.
It's like bait car.
Yeah.
It's like bait car but for Amazon packages.
It's pretty good.
I wish it was acid in there.
It was fucking subtle.
It's in the face.
Yeah.
Anybody steal Amazon packages?
I don't mind because Amazon replays don't even bad an eye at it.
So you're not stealing.
They replace it right away.
I'm not condoning this.
It sounds like you're participating in it.
But I'm also saying at the end of the day.
It sounds like you're participating in it.
I've had packages stolen or whatever.
It's a thing.
Hey, my package ever showed up and they go, all right.
There's a new one on the way.
Yeah.
How do you get it?
But then you realize when you...
When you get to the level of Amazon, you're like, oh, it's...
Bezos can afford it is what I'm saying.
They can definitely afford it.
And what you're getting is like garbage half the time anyway.
Dude, it's a Crop Shoot.
You can just end up with like a vibrator or a faceload.
You don't fucking know what you're getting.
You have no idea.
Either way.
I'll take either.
Good times.
Good times.
That's a party, right?
Yeah.
You get both of them in two weeks.
Get some truly Celsius and those two things and you got all the fucking date.
Buddy, thank you so much for coming in and sitting with us.
We're going to get to a few Patreon questions here.
I'm so excited.
Some fan questions.
It's great.
Let them pick our brains a little bit.
You look great, by the way.
Thank you very much.
We talked about this.
You're losing weight.
You look fantastic.
Thank you.
You guys look angelic as well.
You look amazing.
Thank you.
I love you too.
I love you guys.
There's something going on with the cameras or the jacket where people think that I'm
losing weight.
So I'm getting some compliments.
Which I didn't want to...
It's not true, by the way.
I didn't want to stop them.
But I have...
Within the past two weeks, I've seen you eat a salad.
So that might have...
I've had a couple of salads.
You know what I think does it for you also?
Is your haircut.
Your haircut looks amazing.
Yeah.
That's a great look for your hair.
Thank you.
So I think that makes your face slim down.
Finally, he's trying to fuck you.
I'm trying to fuck you.
I want to fuck you in your Jenna Jackson Rhythm Nation jacket that you have on.
I can't be hiding.
I just hold his tits.
Can you just go with this for me?
Four, three, two, one.
Bam.
Bam.
Bam.
Bam.
Bam.
Bam.
Bam.
Bam.
Bam.
Bam.
You pay bills, Frank, huh?
You pay your bills?
Shut up,
man.
Also for a big guy, I don't know if it's selection when you get to the store or not, but the
colors you choose are out of this.
That first round of ads for the stereo app, it was just me by myself.
I had this thing on, I was all jacked up.
I'm like, this Thursday night, make sure you start up, run, run.
You're peacocking in that tree.
I don't do, listen I'm significantly smaller than you.
I'm a chubbier guy.
I wear all black or earth tones.
This guy comes in with like neon green, neon yellow, baby blue.
I like to show it off.
That's the other way to go.
You lean into it.
You lean into it and you're getting people to wear the big, the big, boisterous stuff
and then it takes away from the chubbiness for people.
They don't know what's going on.
But only certain people can get away with it.
What's going on?
Because you have to own it while you're doing it and you're owning the shirt while you're
wearing it.
That's right.
I fucking own it.
Fucking owning it here.
Oh, he leases it.
He's got to have it back.
Nothing's back in two months.
Why do you think I keep it at the studio?
It's property of AYG.
That jacket's got its own room here.
We got a hot one.
Two other shows are wearing this.
But no, you look fantastic.
I was thinking before we came in, we're all Irishmen.
Yes.
Here to a degree.
Yeah.
And I was curious, do you guys have any, are you starting to have any of the shanty Irish
afflictions that usually come?
Like, do you, does anybody have gout?
You have, you're starting to get eczema or something.
Over the past six months, I've over quarantined, I've developed eczema.
Yeah, that's real.
Like, and just some old Irish guy.
Yeah.
I have bad skin now.
Dial soap.
Are you whittling while you're eating that?
Eating that onion?
Just looking at your eczema while just carving a ship out of soap.
Out of a potato.
Fast and skilled Kennedy.
We got the White House.
Things will never be the same.
Yeah.
You have eczema now?
Yeah.
I developed it over, yeah.
How does, is that, they know how it happened or no?
I don't know.
Because I'm wondering.
He's Irish trash.
Yes.
What do you mean?
I mean, dude, I'm just talking enough to be in a dirt ball, I don't know.
It's genetic garbage.
Yeah.
The, no, I haven't got gout yet, but I was convinced.
Yeah.
Because we looked like, this show could be called three guys with gout.
Like, honestly, it really could.
Are you gout?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Brought to you by Flonix.
So you think you can gout?
Brought to you by Musenax.
No, no gout yet.
But I just have, you know what's getting from me?
The old Irish man, ear hair slash nose hair thing that I have to watch.
But that's not an affliction, I guess.
But it kind of is.
If you let it go, it's not good.
It's bad.
I think if you let it go, it becomes like that hardcore coarseness.
Makes my fucking.
It's the kind of thing that, you ever have the ear hair and then you scratch it in your
head.
It sounds like a DJ in your ear.
You ever had that?
What?
You never had that when you rubbed the ear hair on your ear and it sounds like, wait,
wait, wait.
No, I'm not from the Shire.
Yeah.
I had like long ear hair.
I had to get a, I had to get one of those ear hair things and I had to like take it out
of my nose and take it out of my ear.
All right.
Well, this brings out, I mean, this is a perfect segue into the first question from Patreon.
Guys, you know, when you sign up for Patreon, we will automatically answer your question.
We'll also answer some from the Facebook group.
Those are the two main ways people are sending us message emails.
Those are the two best ways to do it.
Join the Patreon.
Definitely get it read.
And we also pull Facebook group.
This is from Anthony.
Anthony.
Have you ever used a car key to clean the wax out of your ears?
What the fuck?
Or anything else?
I've gotten in there with a paper clip a couple of times.
I've used a pen cap.
Yeah.
Car key never.
Cause I think there's so much crap on car keys.
You're just, you're just adding to the wax.
I've used car keys to clean my sinuses out.
You're like, I use car keys as a CPAP machine.
I've used it to clean my nails.
I've used car keys to clean my nails.
But it has to be a silver one.
I don't do that.
How could you stick a key in your ear and get anything?
That's what I want to know.
How bad is your wax build?
No, I think you'd like, it's not that bad.
So you like kind of just circle around.
I don't know.
I mean, I'm not a fucking, I'm not an ENT.
I've never been a big ear wax guy to be honest.
I don't really get it that bad.
I get it when the headphones give it to everybody.
So I wear my headphones, then I'll have a ton of it right after I wear my headphones.
And I'll use even Q-tips, which is such a racking.
What they're saying is, don't, now Q-tip,
he's came out and said, don't put these in your ears.
It's like, dude, you fucking sold us on it for 30 years,
and you take the supply away.
That's like McDonald's saying, don't eat Big Macs.
That's the same thing.
So get the fuck out of here.
Which they're not.
But no one has said that.
But car keys, no.
Have you?
No.
No way.
But what you've used, PENCAB I've used for my nails and my ears.
Sure.
But car key, I don't see, I've never,
I've probably, I've used it to open boxes, a car key.
That's not trashy, I guess.
Yeah, yeah.
I've used it to open boxes.
Shut that up a couple times.
I fucked myself with it.
I use, I gotta use a Q-tip after the shower.
That's part of my shower routine.
Same here.
On the same way.
Which is growing, by the way, which is annoying.
The shower routine as you get older, it gets more and more.
We've said this, I think, on hard feelings or on the Patreon.
I don't think it's an age thing.
I think it's a size thing for you.
There's a lot going on.
There's a lot of wear and tear on that body.
Maybe.
I probably have more stuff.
What do you, what do you, what'd you add to it?
Can you give us the list?
Uh, well, I got my-
I don't know if we want this list, by the way.
This is gonna be a fucking nasty list.
Shut my car keys in my pee hole.
I have the foot scrubber thing in the shower.
That's the first thing.
Oh, really?
I just scrubbed my feet.
I get out, towel dry, duty years.
I have to get, I got this,
shout out to fucking Goldbond.
Goldbond has shit in the, in the spray can now.
Really?
Yes.
Spray on Goldbond.
I had, I had a mishap.
It's like Banksy over here.
Dude, I'm in there fucking tagging this shit out of myself.
I had a mishap with Goldbond once.
I didn't realize you're not supposed to put
medicated Goldbond on your, in your, on your balls.
And it burned?
Is it like an Icy hot white thing?
Yeah, it's kind of, I always put it on.
That's the whole point.
He said medicated.
I put medicated.
Yeah, Goldbond is medicated.
No, no.
Then it's, then it's something, I put it too much or something.
And I was walking around all day.
I had to go home.
I was like, I was, I think I was like working somewhere.
And I had to leave in the middle.
I got to go home for personal reasons.
I said it was personal reasons.
I got to get out of here.
I must have put too much.
I think I just, I was like making cutlets down there.
You know what I'm saying?
Like I was, I was like powdering it with my hand.
And I think I just took way too much.
Because you had so much.
He was like Lebron before the playoffs.
It was like, it was like the most painful Zeppeli ever.
Couple of deep fried Oreos there.
Couple of funnel cakes down that bad boy.
Are you, are you a Goldbond guy?
Do you powder right now?
I was up until that point.
I, no, I don't powder right now, but I go through phases.
So I'll bring back powder.
But I do, I go all Johnson's and Johnson's baby.
I go old school.
Wait, so right now you get out of the shower.
There's no powder.
I dry.
Cause yeah, really.
I use a blow dryer.
You know what I use it more powder?
That's a size thing.
Maybe.
I just want, I've always done it.
I just like to make sure everything's dry.
He uses a blow dryer and a team of eight.
I'm pretty sure.
Two of the neighbors come over.
They're a NASCAR pit crew.
There's a pandemic.
You need a part-time job.
Just go for it.
The, no, I use, you know what I do it?
It's probably, and tell me if it's the worst for you.
The summertime is when it's, it's, it's peak.
That's summertime.
I have it, I have the bad, the, the in-between.
I'll, I'll be on my phone too long or something.
You get the sweaty there.
The sweaty rash in the middle.
And I can't stand it.
I'll put powder on that.
You need anti-chafing stick.
That's what I got.
Is that what it is?
Yep.
You should put it right in between your thighs or in any crevice that you don't want to get done.
I think it's official all female listeners have tuned out at this point.
You gotta put your stick in between your teeth.
Honey, I'll be in there in a second.
I gotta put my cream on.
But no, car keys, I feel like it's hardcore.
That's like a new level of...
To get something out too.
That's crazy.
I don't know.
I don't, I don't, I mean, yeah, our listeners are fucking savages, dude.
You know?
I mean, they're listening to, they're listening to Art U Garbage.
They're not fucking, they're not Kennedys.
So if he's asking, do you do that, does that mean that he does that?
Yeah, for sure.
Yeah, I would think.
Yeah, yeah.
This is from Kishan.
Have you ever taken a leak while brushing your teeth?
Oh, yeah.
Yes, absolutely.
I can't.
It's too much moving.
Oh, I think you just kind of go at a slower rate.
So you're kind of like...
That's like rubbing your head and packing your stomach.
I can't do it.
I'm not...
That's why I'm not a good drummer.
I can't keep two tempos.
Do you have to keep one hand on the pee pee while you're peeing?
I have to.
What do you mean?
Like, do you have to keep one hand on your wee wee to keep it pointed in the right direction?
Or will it hang down and pee?
Otherwise, then I have to...
You got a small dick?
What's the deal?
Yeah, I think we've gone over that.
I got the Irish Curve.
Yeah.
No, but I'm just saying, but you have to look to...
Yeah, you have to make sure you're fucking...
Because I can see if you had the whole one hand and that you couldn't do.
No, I'm not like peeling back fucking fat flaps or anything like that.
Like, it fucking...
But yeah, I just can't...
I see like just now, this starts moving.
Like, I can't do two different tempos.
You're doing a little pee.
So I'm like fucking, you know...
I think I'm doing it, but it's a half-assed brush.
I'm not doing a full brush when I'm peeing.
Yeah.
And I've probably only done it a couple of times.
I'm not doing it on like...
Do you brush your teeth in the shower?
No, I've never done that.
Yeah, it's trash.
I've been peeing in the shower lately.
Oh, that was the next question.
Do you pee in the shower?
Yeah.
No, I never hit for the RU garbage cycle and peed in the shower while brushing your teeth in the shower.
That's, I mean...
Wow.
I pee in the shower all the time.
That's just...
Then you're just an assassin at that point.
It's a pretty warm feeling.
It's probably the closest thing to doing heroin you could probably get.
It's just...
It feels you fork.
Peeing in a warm shower while a shower's coming down over top of you.
Are people not peeing in the shower?
That's crazy to me.
I'm not.
I don't pee in the shower.
You don't probably love it.
I've heard about the ringworm thing.
I don't pee in the shower.
Ringworm.
You get ringworm.
I've been peeing in the shower every day for 34 years and I don't have a ringworm.
What kind of fucking Irish tail have you been being told at night?
Why don't you be peeing in the shower?
I was on a ship once and they told me about ringworm and the sea monster.
That's what wrestlers get.
Don't get that from peeing.
You can get that from stepping on pee.
Maybe it's not your own pee, but maybe it's...
Maybe that's the thing.
You can't get it from your own pee.
Well, you've got to knock the other pee out with your pee so you don't get ringworm.
But why do you think if you go to their college dorms, they wear flip flops into the shower?
Because that's like 50 guys using the shower.
But then what's the difference then?
Well, like if it's like you, if you're in your...
How many dudes you get rolling through there?
A team of 80.
A couple of guys coming in.
I think you're fine.
I've never had it.
Oh, okay.
I've just never done it.
I never did it.
Give it a whirl.
Go home tonight.
Give it a whirl.
I've had ringworm.
It's all pipes.
It's all pipes.
I think I just feel the shower would be gross after I get it or something.
I'm not dainty at all, but for some reason I don't do that.
Great feeling.
Let it go, dude.
Is it great?
Yeah.
I'll do it in the tub.
I don't care.
Do you feel like you're just going against the asylum norm?
You feel like you're on heroin.
Like the warm water is rushing over your back and pee is coming out of you.
It's great.
You either got really bad heroin or you pee really good.
I've drugged off in the shower.
One or the other because they ain't the same.
I guess I could pee in the shower.
You either got some bad, some bad H.
I've drugged off in the shower.
Definitely.
Oh, I did that this morning.
Did you?
Yeah.
I love what worked, dude.
Sign me up.
I'm like a stone mason.
Yeah.
You have in your own apartment now.
Are you all over the place with that?
What do you mean?
There's like the honeymoon in there.
Oh, no.
Well, no.
No, because it's COVID.
It's very hard.
No.
They say where you're jerking off.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
I'm all over.
Ever since I got blinds too.
That was...
Once I got blinds, it was a fucking free-for-all.
Way to like get my blinds, you son of a bitch.
That's how trash I am.
I didn't have blinds.
My landlords were like, we're going to get you blinds.
They bought blinds for the house and they were like...
A Donnelly guy ain't playing ball.
I'm like, I'm literally jerking off my living room like huddled down on the couch so nobody
is too low.
I'm basically doing the stop drop and roll but for jerking off.
He's under the couch cushions.
I've been there and you're just praying no one can see you.
If I can't see them, they can't see me, right?
Meanwhile, someone's on the roof just like, oh, look at this fucking...
That sounds like a felony now.
They'll come and get you.
Not if you're in your house.
You don't think?
If you live across from a school, maybe.
Yeah, yeah.
Exactly.
What do you think we moved there for?
Vacation with Jeffrey Epstein, maybe.
All right.
This is...
Wait, we're just on the same fucking...
Peeing in the shower.
Peeing in the shower.
Great question.
Love it.
Yeah.
This is pretty funny.
That's not the first time that question came up on the show, right?
I think it might be.
Wow.
That's interesting.
We've discussed it in the shower.
I don't think so, to be honest with you.
I mean, maybe in quick passing.
I know we've discussed not really wiping and hopping in the shower when you're done pooping.
I've done that.
Yeah, sometime.
You feel like you're cheating the system on that one.
Yeah.
You feel like you're making deals because you're like, save all that toilet paper or those
wipes.
This is from the Savage Cabbage.
Anybody in your family pronounce the word Italian as Italian?
Yes.
No, no.
Because Long Island, I don't do that.
No?
No, I think it's Italian.
Yeah.
I've always heard Italian.
Italian.
Yeah.
Italy.
Italy.
They'll say Italy.
Italy.
Is that just an accent thing, though?
I think it's just a derphalbilly thing.
Italy.
Yeah.
But then Chicago is Italian, right?
They say Italian in Chicago.
Only if you've got something bad to say about them.
Somebody owes you some money.
If one's late on the V, it'll be an Italian.
This Italian fucked my girlfriend.
It's never in a proper way.
No, you've got beef with Big ZD.
You're saying Italian is so good.
Big ZD.
Big ZD is the trashiest of all the Italian dishes.
I like to go on record.
Big ZD is the one that broke out from the rest of the Italian.
Big ZD will have every, even an Irish VFW haul gets together.
We'll have Big ZD.
Big ZD is the go-to.
Yeah.
Let's go rap.
Let's get lasagna.
That's like, we were saying growing up,
I think it was in the, let's get lasagna.
Let's just fake it as lasagna bullshit.
Trying to face yourself.
But you're right, though.
Just have lasagna.
Yeah, get your shit together with you.
What the fuck?
Yeah.
Fucking paying for this.
And anytime someone gives you, like, a ZD,
it's always like, they got to tell you how simple it is to make it.
It's easy.
You just make their noodles, dump it, and show them around.
Yeah, I know.
It sucks, lady.
That's why I didn't fucking make it myself, you dumb bro.
That's also why they don't make the lasagna,
because they're like, I'm not, it's too much.
It's too much.
I can't dance delay.
Last time, I put a little fucking time and effort into it.
It's so true.
It's so easy.
How easy is it?
How easy is it?
Every single fucking time.
The only times I've had, like, an ant explaining to me how good it is,
how easy it is to make ZD.
It's like, yo, buttered noodles or hit the bricks.
Okay?
I'm not wasting my time.
Yeah, you boiled noodles, put some cheese and sauce through it in the oven,
watched Oprah fuck the mailman, and pulled it out.
We get it.
All right, this is, yeah, that was Italian.
This is for Shawna.
You're a bit of a, you know, bit of a drinker.
Have been.
He likes the cocktail.
That's for the listener.
That's how me and Donnelly are fucking.
Donnelly's like one of my go-to drinking guys.
He looks very Hemingway right now, too, by the way.
You got the watch.
Yeah.
That's my go-to.
I'm going to write a novel after this.
Very Florida keys vibe right now.
Oh, thank you.
You just got that.
You have, like, kind of like Boat Captain going to a tristinine.
Yeah, just that.
He's got his good double pocket shirt on.
This is, like, this is, I have a show tonight.
This is the shirt I'm wearing.
This is, like, nice for me.
This is actually nice.
I got a christina night.
Yes, we are drinking pals.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
One of the greatest, we drink one of the greatest bars
I've ever been to in my life.
Yeah, it's on, it's, there's, there's, like, a romance behind it.
We get there, and, like, they don't close,
like, they'll let us stay, and it's just fucking,
Shawna, anytime, anytime you try to leave,
at any time, you know, like, are you going?
You're like, hey, Shawna, I'm leaving.
He goes, you're leaving?
Why?
It could be, like, fucking noon the next day.
You're, like, covered in blood.
I'm like, I gotta get a whop.
You're leaving?
Why?
Some people get very scared when I do.
I do.
I do.
It's anxiety, really.
And sometimes it gets, you know, it gets a little...
I like to leave early.
Gang, real quick, let's talk about the brand new live show
happening over there on the Stereo app of RU Garbage.
You're going to be taking your questions live on the air.
Yeah, guys, you get to join the conversation on the Stereo app.
It's going to be me and the big man chopping it up.
You guys get to jump in with your questions.
We'll go over them live on the air on the Stereo app,
and we're going to be doing this every Thursday
for the next couple of weeks.
Get involved.
It's going to be a good time.
It's easy.
Just go to the link in the description of this episode.
The link is Stereo.com slash Kevin Ryan or Stereo.com
slash H Foley.
And when you click that link and sign up for the Stereo app,
me and a big man get to wet our beaks a little bit.
Everybody wins.
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Now back to the show.
You don't like...
You're the worst hang.
You used to be such a good hang.
You stink anymore.
I used to be.
I'm surprised.
I mean, like back in the day when we were like,
drink like at the land in the village and stuff,
you were a good hang.
You'd be drinking and telling jokes.
And dude, now you're like,
why is that guy looking at me?
Why is that bartender not serving me?
What's down these deal?
I got to get out of here.
I got your car.
I got the thing.
I got the bag.
You, but you do, you leave.
You do leave early now.
I do.
You do that.
Because I think I had a couple of late nights with you.
And then...
I'm 45.
I'm 42.
Yeah.
And also we're not even doing it right now.
So that's when we do it.
We go all out.
Yeah.
We did a, we did a patty's outdoor thing.
And we got a little bit toasty.
And then got even more toasty after.
Yeah.
Exactly.
How do we do?
Fantastic.
I've always, my parents have always been that family.
We've always left early.
Yeah.
So it's innocent.
Gotta get home.
You're all fucking dorks.
That's what I mean.
Not only are partying over here.
You hear this bullshit?
The foliage leave right before the check gets dropped.
They just did last call, Terry.
Get your bag.
Terry, Mike's looking at dessert menu.
Let's go.
Stretching the arms while you're pushing the check over.
All right.
It's been a cold night.
Listen, we had a great time with you guys.
Thanks so much.
I so hope that plays on camera.
That was fantastic.
That was great.
We had a good time with you guys.
No.
Not that.
Not never at dinner.
Just like by like parties.
I don't know.
I don't know.
We got the anxiety.
What do you mean by that?
Relax.
Have a drink.
But you used to hang out later.
You were saying earlier in the comedy.
Well, we were doing a lot of shows.
In the village we were doing a lot of shows at the lantern and stuff and we'd have like
an eight, a ten and a midnight and then like you know, after the ten you start boozing,
drinking.
Right.
We were hanging.
I was outside smoking.
Everything's hanging.
Now he's like, I'm good.
Dude, we'll literally get in the car.
But you have the look and demeanor of a person and how much I like you.
I want you to hang out longer.
Right.
Do you know what I'm saying?
I want you to hang out with a guy who does hang out until five in the morning.
Yeah.
Right.
Doesn't he?
Yes.
Anxiety is too bad.
It's too much.
It's too much.
The next time you're hanging out at five.
Have you ever gotten like, when me, when me, like making you feel weird about leaving,
did you get mad at me from doing that?
Like back when you.
Not mad.
Just gives me anxiety.
Everything gives you anxiety, dude.
You're giving me anxiety.
And for me to stay late, let's be honest, I need to procure some accessories.
All right.
Let's put it that way.
I'm not good.
Just drinking.
I get tired.
I get drunk.
Oh, okay.
I see what you're saying.
Okay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You need to, you need to pick me up.
Sure.
Yes.
I got you.
You sent them are like, you know, they're about to raid the place.
You sit there.
You're like, nah, just a cranberry juice for me.
Like fucking killing everybody.
Fucking informant.
He's like, he's ratting on everybody.
If only cleans his ear with car keys on the night out, he starts hearing real fast.
His business.
His ears get some business plans.
You get out of there like you're wearing a wire.
I know.
I don't like it.
Abracadabra.
He jumps over the bar.
Yeah, dude.
Fucking take a Xanax.
Relax.
Will you?
A couple of guys trying to hang out over here.
Have a snake bite.
William.
I'm telling the story.
I'm just reading.
Kevin are just drinking.
I would follow it comes over.
So what do you hear about that shipment coming in?
Save it in my chest.
Will you?
The boss saying thing.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
The boss saying thing to you.
Can you still get me those tickets?
What are you talking about Folly?
Oh, man.
Holy shit.
Good times, huh?
But this is, so that all stem from this is from Ryan.
Have you ever used something to stare a drink that wasn't a spoon or a straw?
Oh, yeah.
When you're like drinking with your buddies at a house or something.
Butter knife.
Probably a pen.
A pen.
Sure.
Like in the dorm room or something.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Do you ever have someone make you one?
Stare it with their finger then give it to you?
What?
Yeah.
That's a lot of my family parties.
I was like, this is good, right?
I'm like, yeah, sure.
Let's do it.
I don't give a fuck.
Now that your nail's floating in there.
Yeah.
It's whiskey ain't it?
It'll kill whatever's in there.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's alcohol.
Yeah.
Sure.
It's like the thing at the barber shop, the barber side.
Oh, yeah.
Did you guys, growing up, did you guys in your like little bar set up in your family home,
wherever that was?
We didn't have one.
Whenever it came out.
Yeah.
Because we used to put the bar on top of the washer and dryer.
They were just putting the bar and you were putting two liters in a fucking bottle of
pop off on the washer and dryer.
Stop calling it a bar.
It was a bottle of Mericino cherries.
There was some cut up limes.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, I know exactly.
You would put the bullshit tablecloth over it.
Exactly.
Try to make it nice, a bowl.
Exactly.
A bowl with ice in it.
Yeah, we've talked about this.
My parents always lancer's wine, which was always like this red bottle.
Do you remember this red bottle of wine?
I think it was like cheap wine, but they loved it.
If it's coming from your family, it was for sure cheap wine.
No one's pegging you as I go.
Let me get a Saviano.
No.
Sutter home or nothing.
Are you saying my parents weren't some on Yays?
Do our parents, because I have that, your mom drinks, you know.
Nesey wine.
Yeah.
That's what my whole family calls it.
Nesey wine.
What's Nesey wine?
Like fruit wine?
It's cavet Pinot Grigio.
It's like, you know, a nickel for a fucking 55 gallon jug.
Holy shit.
So do you think they really...
Is that boxed?
Sorry, is that boxed?
We got a little bit of games.
It does.
You can get it in the box.
Yeah.
At the manufacturer's request.
Don't act like you can't get a box of it.
You can't get it.
What does your mom drink?
Coors, lights?
Just the...
I don't know if I mentioned this last time.
I think I did, actually.
The Budweiser Midgees, the little...
Oh, we call them ponies.
Yeah.
Love a pony.
Yeah.
You get some rolling rock ponies, a bucket of ponies, and a nice sports bar.
Good night.
Oh.
That's a shot.
Fucking just ice cold.
They're great.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Wacking ponies.
No, but I was going to say, do you think our...
Like, do they really like that one?
Like you're saying, like, my parents loved it.
Did they really love it or did they just get used to it because it was so cheap?
I think they liked it.
I remember they liked it, but they liked it because that's what they're used to drinking
because it's cheap.
Like, like, yeah.
So I think it's like a...
So that's what their tastes are, you know, are based on?
It's a chicken or an egg.
Yeah, exactly.
It's like, yeah, this isn't bad.
We can afford it.
Yeah, it's a taste of it.
Because there's a lot of that.
To this day, my mom puts...
We're all so Irish yaks from fucking Long Island.
My mom puts ice in her wine.
She puts ice in it.
And red wine.
And white wine.
I don't think it matters.
I don't think it matters.
And so people think that's like blasphemous for wine.
You can't do that to wine.
But on the island, I'm sure...
On the island, it's on the menu.
Yeah.
It's 50 cents extra.
It's fucking delicacy.
It's on the menu.
On the island, it's on the menu.
Rocco, use the good ice tonight.
Well, you come on.
Give me the good ice tonight.
Not the cube stuff.
Way in between.
Wine with crushed ice is having a wine slurpee.
Oh, wow.
That brings up this.
This is for Michael.
Would your family put cases or 12 packs of beers and soda outside on the porch during,
like Thanksgiving or Christmas?
Not in a cooler.
Just outside because it was cold out.
Yes.
On the back.
100%.
Oh, my dad had vintage celsers also.
Celsers and coax and everything.
Everything just outside.
Or in the garage on the side.
Yeah.
Vintage like old?
Vintage the brand.
That's a trashy celser brand.
I'm really surprised.
Probably a 12 pack of 35 cents.
I'm really surprised you were just name dropping vintage.
I'm stunning.
I thought that's what you meant.
I'm like, there's no way.
I got all my money in vintage celser.
Our cellar was filled with old-timey celser.
1983 vintage celser.
They were all in those canisters that the clowns had.
They spray each other with.
That's what you know.
With the gun.
A bunch of racist celsers.
Oh, man.
This is from Gary.
Do all your bathroom towels match?
No, of course not.
What?
No, you mean when I was growing up and now.
I don't think that's ever happened.
Oh, growing up, yeah.
We had one set of show towels that you couldn't touch.
You touched those towels.
But I mean like.
No, I think you mean overall.
If you got out of the shower and your mom got out of the shower,
did those two towels match?
No.
Some of them did.
Yeah, but not all of them.
They weren't all of the same.
We're not throwing out towels.
What are we fucking assholes?
Well, that's kind of the point.
That's the idea.
It's like, yeah, they're fucking three bucks.
You can throw them out.
Yeah.
We also had a beach towel that had fricking.
It looked like pantyhose stretched apart.
You can see through it at times.
You can see through it.
And we still have it.
They wouldn't throw it away.
We never, we never.
I would use it like a fucking idiot.
I know.
I do.
We're the same way.
But here's the thing.
Those towels.
I like a towel when it's all worn down.
No, but then it gets.
Because you never had a new one.
They get a new one.
Then talk to me.
Okay.
This is what he does.
He justifies his dirt ball.
I know he's right.
It's worn in.
If you have a new one, it's too soft.
If the new one is too like slippery.
Too soft, Sean.
Too slippery.
Can a beer be too cold?
Yeah, it doesn't get the water off you.
It doesn't get the water off you.
Yeah, that's not washed.
I'm not saying like take it right off the shelf.
You need a little bit of grit on that.
It takes a little while.
It's not just one wash.
It takes a few washes.
Okay.
No.
Okay.
It takes like two football seasons.
No.
Get out of here.
You're nuts.
But I'll say this.
Like I said, it gets to a point that it doesn't pick up any of the water because it's basically
a giant, loose leaf piece of paper.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're just moving it around.
You're just moving it around.
Yeah, exactly.
I love it.
Might as well use paper towels.
Like paper towels probably had more absorbability than that one towel, that peach towel towel.
My roommate, my roommate flip, growing in college or whatever, like he would like not have a towel
or whatever.
And he would, sometimes he would dry off using paper towels.
I'm like, dude, take a t-shirt or something.
He would just be like, what the, I'm like, dude, that was fucking three bucks.
I just bought that roll of paper towel.
You'd use like 80 of them.
No, dude.
You're not saving anything.
Like just buy yourself a towel and save way more money.
I remember looking at him like an animal.
I'm like, dude, I'll use a dirty t-shirt or a sock or something.
I'm like, this is savagery.
That's trash.
I've used the t-shirt to dry off.
Oh yeah.
I didn't forget I hadn't.
Of course.
I forgot I didn't have a towel.
For a year.
I'll do that now.
Let me sidebar here.
How do you feel, and I know this isn't good for the pipes.
How do you feel about wiping with a paper towel?
I'll do it.
Yeah.
I have no, it's weird.
I have no problem doing it if I have to.
You don't prefer it.
No, I don't prefer it.
I would say I prefer it.
You prefer it.
Prefer it.
More grip.
That's a man's man right there.
On the job site, is that what you prefer it?
Oh, you more.
I might ask what a hand towel.
You know what it is?
It keeps more distance between you and the material.
You get a little more.
You get in there a little more with that.
You get a little more grip.
You get some more.
I love you when it's a good grip sometimes.
I've even done it.
You ever do it when you're in a pinch?
And it's like the school paper towels?
Oh, the hard ones.
The hard brown ones?
Those things are shoeboxes.
They're brutal.
Yeah, I've wiped with those.
And that's brutal.
That's like playing basketball and dress shoes.
It's like you're sliding all over me.
Fully wipes with paper towels and he dries with a shop vac.
Yeah.
Shout out to a good shop vac.
I always wanted to have like, we've posted pictures of it.
They posted pictures in the Facebook group where it's that one unit.
It's like a sink, a toilet, and a shower all in one thing.
I always wanted like the Jetsons version.
Like we just would go through a little conveyor belt.
And everything just happens at once?
Yeah, you come all out.
Yeah.
Sounds like a real go-getter.
Can I stand there and someone performs on my body and comes in for me?
Hey, can somebody get this poop out of my butt please?
He's like, Fully's like, I went to the circus the other day.
They're just hosing down this elephant.
This guy's got a mate in the shade.
I used to love taking a shower with the hose.
Well, I don't mind that.
After like, one thing I'll say is, I don't know if this is even trashy or not, the beach
showers are great.
Oh, we talk about it all the time.
The outdoor shower?
That's a great sensation too, because you're in the hot weather and the cold water.
It's fantastic.
It feels good.
Big outdoor shower guy.
When I landscaped in the summer, we would be around poison.
I'd be so much that we'd always have a thing of palm olive or something.
There's one of those soaps that if you washed off with it, it killed the grease.
Really?
Yeah.
So when you got out of there, we immediately would like take showers in the people's backyard
just, you know, with our shorts on or whatever.
Yeah.
And take a shower with fucking dishwashing soap.
Ride back feeling clean as a whistle.
Like you're Jules Winfield in Pulp Fiction.
Gentlemen, you both in the county?
Exactly.
All right, this is actually from the Facebook group.
This is from Manny.
Do you or does anyone in your family have an old couch on your front porch or outside
anywhere?
Back porch, garage?
But not to Duke boys.
Well, my front porch or lawn on your side?
Front porch, you're saying?
Front porch, like, you know.
Oh, as the seating?
As the seating.
No, no, no.
That's some real, that seems like a down home, south kind of thing.
When you don't care about the property value.
Yeah.
Well, we would do it, growing up, garage.
It was like we would.
Sure.
Oh, we got a garage in the garage.
You got a couch in the garage.
Oh, but not.
It was like an old couch that you like moved down.
You're like, oh, the kids will sit on this in the garage.
Exactly.
I think we did that at one point.
Yeah.
Well, I think I told you this.
I don't know if I said this last time.
But then it got to the point where my dad's friend, Bob Lolley,
stored his boat in our garage and it didn't fit.
It stuck out of the garage.
Did I tell you guys that?
I don't even know.
I think so.
Yeah.
So wait, you had the ass of a, you had the front of a boat sticking out of your thing
all winter.
For like 20 years.
The Donnellys must be doing pretty well.
Yeah, that's probably what they thought.
That's nuts.
They got a boat.
They got a Caprice classic and a boat in their garage.
At least they don't have a couch on the front of the boat.
Yeah, right.
Well, I think that is like, because I think you might have mentioned this too,
but I have like relatives that would keep Christmas lights all year round.
And we never understood that.
That's trash.
In the backyard, you know, now it's kind of okay to have Christmas lights.
In the backyard.
Oh, if you're entertaining.
If you're entertaining.
Yeah.
But if you turn them on, that's fine.
But if you just got them up and you're not turning them on, that's trashy.
And I'm not even talking about the, I'm talking about the colorful bowls.
Like sand and all that stuff.
Yeah, you're not mistaken.
These things for just entertaining.
Yeah.
Yeah.
This isn't a luau.
This is like, this should be December.
These things only show themselves.
It's no one's engagement party.
Exactly.
Exactly.
It's not a lumineers video.
Hey.
Hey.
Ho.
Ho.
Dude, that's a fucking great joke.
A lumineers vid.
Who?
Donnelly's hot today, folks.
Killin'.
All right.
This is from Augustine.
This is also a drinky one.
How do you drink your beer at home or in a restaurant?
Like if you're in a restaurant and they serve you, it's in a bottle and they serve you a
glass, do you pour into the glass?
No.
No.
I don't.
No, I drink it in the bottle.
Yeah.
I prefer the bottle.
You?
I think, oh, sometimes, sorry, but sometimes it depends on the beer.
Like unless it's like again, or something that where it's, you know.
We need it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So no, otherwise it's a.
You order like a Budweiser and they bring you a glass.
Out of the bottle.
Out of the bottle.
I'm gonna be a real dirt ball because I thought you meant like how fast?
Because I usually, when I get the first one, I put it down.
Doesn't stand a chance.
Because I want to get into the zone.
Oh, is that what it is?
Oh, yeah.
I chugged my first one.
He's going home by nine.
He has to fix it.
Oh, man.
He's gonna fucking cliff note.
What are my first beers?
I'm saying like a lot.
Hey guys, so I'll see you.
Let me get another beer before I go.
He's boofin' whiskey.
I like a nice drift.
Yeah, but I'm saying you're getting the bottom.
No.
You had to be.
I'm getting the bottom.
I'm getting the bottom.
I'm getting the bottom.
They're servin' it with a glass.
If it's an IPA important in a glass, if it's like a Budweiser, Corona or something light,
I'm keepin' it in the bottle.
Long as it's nice and cold.
Yeah.
It's got to be cold.
That's another thing.
Frosted glass you can't beat.
No, of course.
But at a restaurant, that's not what you get in a day.
Frosted glass in your own home.
You ever have those?
Yeah, yeah.
I do a Guinness.
I do the Guinness cans.
I only do Guinness cans.
The nitro cans are what they have.
The thing in it, yeah.
The bottles stink.
And I do, and I put my-
You are a real Irish.
Yeah, yeah.
My glass in the freezer.
And then I have a cold Guinness.
Would you drink anything else out of that glass?
Yeah, yeah.
I don't.
I don't.
Yeah.
The chocolate milk.
Dude, I love it.
Pullin' out of a frosted glass with some milk.
Oh, it's fantastic.
Oh, I got-
I went on a Zoom date with a girl, like, I don't know, a few months ago, whatever it was.
With Braggen.
Yeah, right?
Yeah.
Talk about Lothario.
But-
And I did Oreos and milk in that glass.
In that pint glass.
And she said, oh, oh, a white guy drinking milk.
It's too gross.
And I'm like, all right, this was fun.
I'll see you.
I'll see you later.
And I was like, what are you talking about?
I don't get the-
She thought, like, the idea of, like, the wholesomeness of the milk.
And then I was like-
I was like-
Like, it was almost like, like, little house in the prairie or something.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Like, drinking milk is like a weird, old-timey thing.
And I was like, yeah, you out of your fucking mind.
Hit the brick, sweetheart.
This is a milk household, okay?
I don't know about that, but I also, I mean, I don't know about milk.
I'm no romance legend.
But, like, that's some milk and Oreos on a date.
What are you doing?
You're making me an effort here, aren't you?
What's going to work out anyway?
Let's bounce.
I'm just here for the Oreos.
I'm just here for the human contact for 10 minutes.
You started out with a glass of red wine.
Suzy, so I saw it going south.
Yeah, go with the milk.
You got a two-footer in front of you.
I'm crushing an Italian combo.
I have caviar and wine.
And then I see-
I said, I'm going to talk for 10 minutes.
I'm like, let me get a glass of milk.
I'm like, I'm going to talk for 10 minutes.
I'm like, I'm going to talk for 10 minutes.
I'm crushing an Italian combo.
I have caviar and wine.
And then I see-
I said, I'm going to talk for 10 minutes.
I'm like, let me get those Oreos and milk.
Grab the Fritos.
You're going to put these back in the fridge?
All right, let's see here.
This is-
This is from Daniel.
Ever invite someone with you somewhere
because you know they will offer to pay for you too?
No, but I'm always excited when that happens.
No, I've never done it on purpose.
Sure.
I've never done it on purpose.
But I maybe-
Because I would never-
I mean, for the explicit reason.
No.
I mean, yeah, that's what they mean.
That's what they mean.
But no, I've done it where I'm friend.
And then if you have a friend that's like, no, I got you.
Yeah, exactly.
I've had that happen.
I have a lot of friends that I know that if they're there,
they're going to be like, I got like-
Yes.
But you want to hang out with them.
Yeah, because they're getting it.
You know what I mean?
No, but what he's saying is like,
for the only reason they're there
is because they're going to pay for them.
Yeah, I've never done that.
I've never done that.
If I may step in.
Kevin's never had to put himself in that situation
because he has a very strong support system,
especially in his lean years.
All of his buddies had good jobs.
Yeah, when I was coming up with all my friends,
you know, I mean, I would hang out-
You made your living at that.
At what?
Yeah, going out-
You're so jealous.
I'm really jealous.
Dude, this is like the third time
you've run it up in three episodes
even on the paper.
I'm not jealous.
You are so jealous.
You live a certain life of comfort.
That's all.
No.
And I didn't.
How much of a comfort could you live
without your friends?
No, no, no.
So my- out of the-
This is what he's talking about.
That's not trashful.
He's friends all the time.
You can go to a restaurant.
I don't get to do that.
Yeah, yeah.
Because buddies-
Sorry, I have friends and I hang out.
His buddies all got cash.
They all got cash and do well.
Yeah.
So when I started comedy,
all my friends were like starting
in like finance or lawyers or whatever.
So like they all have cash.
So I'd be like-
And like they would always listen
to like our pods or whatever.
So they knew I was broken, whatever.
So they would just, you know-
Offer to pay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Did you get trips out of it?
No, no, no.
Yeah.
I know people that got trips out of that stuff.
Oh, wow.
He's not a goomaj.
I will blow him.
Are you a 19-year-old Russian girl?
Can you put your head between your legs?
We get to Miami Beach watching the Trotters.
But also-
My cousin-
Lapillodury, you mean?
Sorry.
Well, my cousins are-
There's like another social circle.
And I was always the youngest by like 10 years.
So don't put down a card.
So like-
Oh.
Like growing up, I was always the kid.
Yeah.
You know, it's like my brother, my sister.
I have like 15, 20 cousins where I was the youngest.
So they're all like, even if I did have money out to pay-
They wouldn't even let you do it.
Get that fuck out of here.
Yeah.
I had that happen with my cousins too.
The foldies don't open tabs.
We pay as we go.
Yeah, of course.
You gotta run out of the minutes, notice.
No, no, you gotta be ready to jump.
What if there's a hot case?
Yeah.
I gotta go to man just call him.
I'm not jealous.
I was just pointing it out.
Yeah, but you-
Not pointing it out.
You pointed it out multiple times.
And the way you do it.
The way you said it was like, you were like, all right, so-
Yeah, this guy-
Because I-
Yeah, sorry, I have family and friends that love me.
I'm not a weirdo with no friends.
I apologize.
Because it's funny.
It's a connotation of how he said Kevin's-
Kevin's-
Kippy's friends.
Yeah.
But you guys are friends.
So he like-
We're not friends.
We don't hang out.
Well, he doesn't hang out.
What are you talking about?
He's not a good hang.
You guys are friends.
I've hung out with you socially more in the past year than I have with him.
Not at all time.
You guys were-
Yeah, he doesn't-
Yeah, we haven't-
We don't hang.
No, we don't hang.
Well, that's also life stuff.
I don't hang out with anybody either.
I'm just saying-
Pandemic.
But pandemic can also-
Even pre-pandemic.
Pre-pandemic.
Every time we meet up, you're like, where's Folio?
I'm like, oh, he went home.
Yeah, yeah, I do do that.
Yeah, yeah.
I do my work and I go home.
For me, it's just my wife and my child.
This guy's on his fucking high horse.
All right, this is from Jamie-
Oh, before the record, it does-
It did sound like you were jealous of his-
100%.
I'm not an asshole.
I'm well aware of that.
The emotional gymnastics he does.
I don't blame you.
It sounds like a nice little life.
Yeah, it sounds nice.
Well, he also like, what am I going to be like?
No, I'm not going to kill him.
He used to be like, I got no money.
I'm like, I got no money.
I'm like, what are you doing?
I'm going down to Philly.
And then Monday, ah, we were here.
We were there.
Ba-da-bing, ba-da-boom, ba-da-bing.
Yeah.
Yeah, people like to have me around.
I'm sorry, people can't say the same for you.
Little orphan Kippy had some fucking daddy war buck situation going on.
Yeah, man.
What do you want from me?
Meanwhile, I'm fucking in Southeast, sleeping on a couch.
All right.
This is from Chad.
Do you eat like regularly?
Do you eat non-breakfast foods for breakfast?
Hold on.
Hold on.
That's a great fucking question.
That's a good one.
Hold on to the question.
The answer is yes.
Because you're a weirder, weirder food guy.
Yeah.
This happened for years.
Like, I only eat eggs for three years.
That's crazy.
So I would, every day, like at breakfast time, I would have lunch food.
Chicken Parm for breakfast.
Chicken Parm cereal.
I would have sides of beef at 10 in the morning.
I'll take the pork chops and an orange juice, please.
Can you give me a souffle for breakfast?
That's a soup today.
But no, yeah, I absolutely would do that.
Absolutely.
All the time.
Mostly sandwiches, like chicken sandwiches.
Yeah, if you're having a chicken sandwich for the first meal today, there's something.
Like in the morning, in the AM?
I would never eat.
You would push lunch up.
I would push lunch up to like 11.
I would first eat at 11.
And now, with my situation, I'm eating at 12, and I'm eating lunch, and I'll have breakfast
foods at 12, because I make myself eggs.
When you were working a regular job, what was your last regular job?
My last regular job is I worked at an advertising place and at facilities, working at facilities
at an advertising corporate job.
You had to be there at like 9 AM.
9 AM.
So what I would probably do there is either I would eat like shitty breakfast food.
So it'd be like a roll or it'd be like donuts.
But then, a lot of the time, I would wait till lunch and eat lunch.
Sean's so trashy.
Or get lunch at 11.
That's rolls breakfast food.
No, in New York, it is a buttered roll.
I don't do it.
Whenever you're in a deli, I'm like, I'll get a bacon.
I can cheese a guy next to me.
I get a buttered roll.
Buttered roll.
What's this, the 1920s?
What the fuck's going on?
Get a bag of like a fucking gentleman.
I think of a butter roll and a Daily Bugle.
That's a European thing, too.
A pound of sugar and a butter roll.
Yeah, what the fuck's going on?
One of those wheel things.
I need 10 cents worth of shoelaces.
We have to pipe tobacco back there.
We have one of those stick candies with a swirl.
Yeah, let me get a roll and some unfiltered lucky sprints.
I don't get it.
I mean, I get it.
It's technically...
It's not a filly thing?
No.
A coffee and a butter roll.
A butter roll is only a New York thing.
A dirt ball New York thing.
What the fuck?
There's nothing in it.
It's a dinner roll.
It's a jelly, something.
Oh, yeah.
But that was...
I just heard someone do it the other day.
A butter bagel, yeah.
A bagel's a breakfast food.
Yeah, butter bagel.
You're not having a bagel.
You're not...
It's just a lighter roll.
I mean, a lighter bagel is a roll.
No, but a roll is a dinner food.
You go out to dinner, they give you a dinner roll.
They give you rolls.
They give you bread with dinner.
You're not getting a blender's bagel at dinner.
A Kaiser roll in the morning...
A butter Kaiser roll in the morning is a breakfast.
It's not getting there.
Lenders bagels are good.
Yeah.
Shout out to Lenders.
That caught everybody's attention.
That was a showstopper.
We were all in the little like, oh, yes, Lenders.
Would you guys freeze them or would you keep them...
God damn right.
Freeze them.
Freeze them.
Of course.
One time, I went over to my buddy's house.
They were just on the counter.
I'm like, dump those.
Get the ones out of the freezer.
The freezer's stacked.
Yeah.
They feel real weird when they're not frozen.
They're like spongy.
Can be presses in the package.
He goes, we're losing them.
I don't trust them.
I only know them frozen.
Fucking get those things on ice.
Get those things on ice.
As long as mom doesn't hate touch.
You want to get these on the rocks?
Yeah.
Let there's bagels.
Shout out to Lenders.
So good.
Showstopper.
I only got a couple of minutes left.
Wait, what was that question?
Oh, the non-breakfast food.
Yeah.
Thanks for tuning in.
He got Lenders bagels on the brain.
You know, I also, this might be pulling back the curtain a little bit.
I think over the last few weeks, I forgot what the family episodes are about because
I realized I've been jumping and answering.
These are questions that the fans want to ask the guest.
The guest should always be answered first.
Oh, but they also want to ask, if it's all different questions, they want to ask you
too.
True, but I feel like I've now found a read.
I think you're overthinking it.
It's a conversation starter for us to talk about Lenders bagels.
I think you're having some of your bar anxiety right now.
Yeah.
That's exactly what's happening.
Wait, who's asking me what?
I'm sorry I answered a question for Mr. Downey.
I apologize.
I'll tell you right now, me and Kevin did not even think that even once.
The whole entire time.
I love you.
I love you so much.
It helps me to re-angle the show.
Gives me a breath of fresh air.
Yeah, this is an off air topic.
Why are you doing this?
Hey, this has been a great episode.
Let me tell you where I've been staring.
Let me play a real cool.
I completely forgot for a couple of weeks that I'm a goober.
All right.
All right.
All right.
All right.
Go ahead.
Let's see here.
What are we at?
I wish I didn't have to.
It's all right.
I really did.
This is from Dan.
Have you ever put a radio bumper sticker on your car or family's car?
Absolutely.
What radio station?
92.7 WDRA.
It was the alternative station in Long Island.
You lost confidence in that.
Yeah.
What do you mean?
Did I?
Was it on your car or your family's car?
It was on my family's car when my sister was driving it.
So my sister probably put it on, but maybe I did.
Did you think it was cool?
I thought it was so cool.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
You never did it?
You are a Long Island trash.
We were a non-bumper sticker household.
Of course.
It wouldn't be tons of bumpers.
It wasn't like we were covered.
It was a one-off radio.
That seemed totally normal to me.
Radio station bumper stickers on it.
It's your trash.
I'm not saying it.
Okay.
Obviously not now.
And then we never had the things like get off my ass or this.
Or I'll fuck you or something.
Yeah.
Whatever.
It was always just like.
Irish trash and vehicle.
I think it was only radio station ones.
That was all it was.
But not even a lot of them.
Just the one.
It's probably an awesome radio station too.
Great radio station.
Yeah.
90s alternative.
Very famous.
Famous around the country for being an alternative station.
Radio stations used to be.
The local radio station that was cool used to be awesome.
They used to make the summer.
And also, I'm shocked you never did this because a lot of the reasons people did that
is because they saw you with it on there that you could win shit.
Even trashier.
What are you talking about?
I realized that as I was saying.
No, no, no.
You can win a free t-shirt.
On the way out the door you drop some dirt bag logic like that.
That's it.
How am I supposed to win journey tickets you fucking asshole?
I thought I had you.
Oh man.
I totally thought I fucking got you.
I was sitting there like what?
How are you going to win the contest?
If you don't have the sticker.
That was real cute.
That was like a bigger kid holding a little kid's head and he was trying to swing to hit
them.
And we got two free tickets to great adventure to the dirt ball family driving around in
the 84 Caprice.
Shout out to the Donleys with the boat hanging out of the garage.
I told you this.
It got stolen and used in a robbery at a King Cullen supermarket.
The boat?
No, the car.
The car.
They stole the car.
They didn't get very far.
That's the thing I call it.
Ahoy, matey.
To the King Cullen.
Give me your money.
Stock up on Lenders Bagels.
All right.
All right.
Gary, what an episode.
Shawnee, thank you.
You must be sitting here.
Thank you guys.
We definitely have you back as soon as possible.
Yeah.
We love having you here.
We love the family episode.
Such a good time.
Keep the questions coming.
Anything you want the folks out there to know before you split.
Right down the barrel.
Yes, sir.
Right here.
I would say yes.
Please follow me at Shawnee Time on Instagram and Twitter.
That's S-E-A-N-Y-T-I-M-E.
And also I have a podcast called the DYM Podcast.
It's movies and more and it's a lot of fun.
So please subscribe, listen and rate and review and all that jazz is what everybody tells
you in this world.
Yes, sir.
We Bob, thank you very much.
Kip, what do you got for him?
Guys, as always, please make sure you subscribe on iTunes.
Full video available on YouTube.
Subscribe there as well.
And then patreon.com.
You get bonus content.
And it's a good fucking time.
Also, follow me on all social media at Kevin Ryan Comedy.
All right.
Excellent.
At H. Foley on Ice on Twitter and Foley Graham's on Instagram.
And we'll see you next week.
Peace.
That was a blast.
That was a barn burner.
Gang, real quick, let's one more time talk about the old stereo app.
We cannot be more excited to have RU Garbage being a part of this fantastic new way to
interact with you guys.
Yeah, guys.
Quick reminder every Thursday for the next couple of weeks.
We're going to be on the stereo app answering your questions live.
It's easy.
Download the stereo app.
The link is in the description.
It's stereo.com slash Kevin Ryan or stereo.com slash H. Foley.
We get to wet our beaks.
It's going to be a good time and get involved, baby.
And it's 100% free and 100% live.
So check us out and join us every Thursday night.
See you there.
Peace.