Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Trashy Haircut w/ Kippy & Foley
Episode Date: November 27, 2023Are You Garbage is back with Kippy and Foley for a family episode to answer your garbage questions from Patreon. Its a fun one! Thanks for watching AYG Comedy Podcast. Love youse guys. Come to a live ...show! NEW TOUR DATES: https://areyougarbage.com/ Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/hfoleycomedy/ Live Shows: https://areyougarbage.com/ PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Adam & Eve: https://www.adamandeve.com/ Promo Code: Garbage Aura Frames: https://auraframes.com/garbage Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans?
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Gang comes to the boys in an RU garbage live show.
Take it to remove and quick and all tickets are available at RUGARBAGE.com.
Welcome to another exciting edition of RUGARBAGE.
The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash.
Now here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.
Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's new favorite podcast.
This is our You Garbage.
So at the little show we sit there with your favorite comedians and we find that they're good to be classy.
Yeah.
They're just a big old piece of trash.
I'm your host H. Foley coming at you on a beautiful day.
We're out back here at
Toadies in a new edition. The holiday season is in full swing. It's upon us. Yes, sir. And she's upstairs making her famous
fire alarm eggnog.
You know why they call it fire alarm eggnog? Why? Because you get so drunk you pull the fire alarm. Okay. My co-host is coming at you from across the table. That's a win, baby quite literal on that one
He is the CEO of our you garbage. He's international business man with ties to East German television
He told me when he gave me the gig. What are you wearing a bunker give it up for KJ?
Kevin James Ryan everybody what up gang? Thanks for tuning in as always please make sure you rate if you subscribe on iTunes
We got a full video available.
Yeah, we do.
As you know, those numbers are,
Root-a-Roop, cooking, cooking.
And obviously the greatest website of all time.
One of the greatest websites of all time,
you go over there, you go to www.patrion.com.
Yes, sure you do.
And you can get a bajillion hours of banish content.
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And also, you get over to www.arugormage.com and you get tickets to all the
gosh darn live shows. There you go. Scoop him up gang. Few ticks left for that Philly show. Grab him.
Philly show. We got going quick. We got a theater show in DC. Get tickets to that. That was
rescheduled. See you down there in December. It's going to be a fricking. You. And have a nice quick
shout out to our producer Rick Shorten air air the magic man makes us all look good works
The ones to choose the three's in a four is he crosses the teeth and he thoughts the eyes
Give it up for T-bone McScruffins Toby McMullen everybody what up boys? What up T-bone?
Not the man nice Chris spare out there keeping it fresh having a real nice time
Can I say something you're gonna get upset about probably?
Your abozo to get them set about probably. Welcome to the show. You're a bozo.
I don't know how to put this.
God, that means it's bad.
It's not bad.
It's not good.
I'm just, as a friend, you're crossing over into lady haircut.
I would let them know.
You're slightly crossing over into lady haircut.
You got a little bit of an antrish vibe.
You got a lady haircut, all right?
This is what we're doing.
This is what we're starting out.
I just thought of it.
Do you own mirrors?
Yeah, you're all around insults like that.
It's crazy.
I'm aware of what I look like physically,
but when it comes, I mean, I'm follically,
you have a good head of hair.
And I know how to take care of it.
Listen, man, if you want to walk around with antrish head,
go ahead. I'm just telling you, she's boofing you want to walk around with the antrish head, go ahead.
I'm just telling you, she's boofing you up a little bit in the back.
You look like you look like a single ant in the 80s who's trying to get it back together
and latch on to something.
The job's going good.
If you started walking in here and sneakers and putting heels on, I wouldn't be surprised.
You got real on the go.
Cut.
I'm just saying. Sure. Let it go out a little
bit. And when you go in there, tell him not to give you that angle. He'll give you
about the answer, the manager. All right. Okay, man. There are no can stone wall from
depot over there. Who I genuinely think is upset. I'm trying to look out for you. Listen,
I am in no way. I am in no place to throw cast,
to throw smoke at someone.
Not even about that, you look at my friend.
If you had a booger or a bad breath, I would tell you.
You got lady cut.
Yeah, well, maybe do it not on the fucking air.
Right off the ramp.
This is what we do.
What are you talking about?
That's crazy.
That's a crazy way to start the show.
What do you want to talk about the stock market?
I don't even even aware that is.
I think they're close today.
Man tensions are high here.
I'm chatting, Tony, I didn't know everybody's taking
it, you're gonna freak out.
Which even makes you a more lady cut.
I really lost the skin.
I'm not getting any ass tonight, I can tell you that.
See, he was sleeping on the couch.
He was like, you two got some of that fire alarm
egg knock already. Going at it.
Hey, you want to be the holidays if we weren't fighting.
No, boys.
Merry Christmas, pal. We're in the season.
Happy Easter, too.
No.
Oh, God.
And what was that thing on your finger?
I got to be honest, I was playing with knives earlier.
Man.
I have two knives, pocket knives.
One, I was always a big knife guy.
I collected pocket knives at an early age.
I don't know why, I just thought they were cool.
You're a weird little kid. I as a weird little kid. Barely seven, eight years old. Everybody loved the pocket knives at an early age. I don't know why, I just thought they were cool.
You're a weird little kid.
I as a weird little kid, barely seven, eight years old.
Everybody loved the pocket knife with the horse.
Who didn't?
You know Swiss army ones?
I felt like a real man and-
Never had the tweezers, they always went quick.
They lost the tweezers.
And the toothpick too.
That was gross.
I never, never kept.
Swiss army knives to me were for dorks.
That was nerd stuff.
Yeah. You need a real quick
Somebody in the Boy Scouts had one of those now wasn't it wasn't my cup of tea you need to always thought that was weird what the Boy Scouts
Yeah
They're a little bit of hot water. They were doing that thing everybody's expected for fucking 50 years
Yeah, which is crazy
My buddies are like yeah, we're going away for the boy scouts. Right. Yeah. No, I had one buddy in the boy scouts. We made fun of them.
I mean, like relentlessly, right? Nine is this is the 90s. You're fucking tan in the boy
scouts. You're catching some heat. I mean, that was play basketball, dude. I know.
Yeah, those outfits were so corny to me. If they just were pants, it looks sweet.
I'd rather they should have dressed them up like soldiers.
It would have looked cool.
I think that was kind of where they were going for that.
It was like very military-esque.
You know, not with a pair of knee knockers on.
I don't know.
Showing the game.
Those high socks.
Hey buddy, get a pair of ankle socks.
It's the goddamn 90s.
Some camos and shit. Everybody would have signed up then.
Sure. If you were rolling around like seal team six out there.
Paraslacks, I would have been it, but then like they had like the shoulder stuff going
in like the tassels. It's like, hey, bitch, I'm 10. What are you doing? Let's let's talk
about trying to get your hands on some eaters. That should be a bad, let me get the heater badge.
I'm eating. That should be a bad.
Let me get the heater badge.
Uh, I think you score booze at the grocery store.
I know.
See what's but.
No, I agree.
A buddy had it.
A buddy was in it.
Like, I got, I always understood the early.
You went to the Cub Scout, like the early,
yeah, you're 7, 8, 9, 10.
I get that.
That's, you know, fun activities.
I'm totally with that.
It teaches some stuff cool, whatever.
I don't think you can judge anybody for any activity
they did while they were children.
Of course, that is what it is.
It was once you got, like, if you were...
I played soccer.
Oh, yeah, that's what it's the world's most popular sport
you're talking about.
And I had a perm when I did it.
If you're driving to your Cub Scout meetings,
that's a tough look.
If you're a physical, like if you got a driver's license
and you're not trying to get laid,
you're going to fucking learn how to start a fire or whatever,
once they boy scouts, T-bone, can you get a look
as a boy scouts, Cub scouts,
what, Eagle scouts?
That's.
They sound like snipers.
That's pretty sweet.
Eagle scout, they sound like virgins. What do you. Yeah, he goes scout they sound like Virgins
What do you talk about the cookies either? Yeah, it's the birds they got the cooks. Well, I think that's what it was very
Girl Scouty to me. I was team Girl Scout. No, who was every spring they rolled out those shortbreads
Mm-hmm. Good. I do it. Oh, I love those things
That was my full ray in a shortbread cookies.
And they weren't that bad.
They were pretty good.
They were all good.
Oh, all their cookies are good.
But the shortbread would be the, you know, the most basic.
The most basic.
Yeah. But, uh, I was playing two knives.
I was playing with knives today.
This morning, this morning, what were you doing?
The stabby thing?
No, it's just kind of showing off for a bunch of boy scouts.
It's what a real man does. I was, uh, I don't Nah, it's just kinda, you know. Showing off for a bunch of boy scouts, huh? It's like, this is what a real man does.
I was, I don't know, I was just fucking around with knives.
All right.
I would like to be a pocket knife guy.
Okay.
I just, I'm not.
Pocket knife with a holder on the belt.
No, you gotta be.
So just a pocket knife in your pocket.
And I don't know about that.
I know.
That's concealed weapon.
In New York, it's weird weapon. New York gets weird too.
New York has real weird.
There was always the, every dirt bag knows the palm.
Was that, did you guys know that?
The palm.
The palm.
It's smaller than my palm.
Yeah.
But I'm not like, that's not it.
That's not a thing, is it?
I don't know.
I don't know if that's an actual.
I don't know if it would hold up in court.
It's smaller than my, but I remember as a young kid,
I'm like, it's everybody's palm.
What do you want to do with this pocket knife?
Not for protection.
I wanna be a guy.
Cause you can't get those things out quick.
No.
You're jammed up.
I wanna be a guy that carries a lot of tweezers.
Fuck.
I think like when you have one,
you're a cool guy like four times a year.
Anybody got a pocket knife?
And what you wanna open packages for people?
Yes, I don't know.
All right. Yeah, I'm not proud
But I cut myself and then I duct tape it that didn't work and I duct tape it again that didn't work
How about we you bleeding? It's gonna as I've started moving in now that we've recording it's slowly starting to bleed again
Let me see that little thing good. I'm not saying I got bit by a sharp
But it's I'm not worried about the cut. I'm worried about the blood getting all over stuff put some super glue on it
My friend Toby McMullen told me that we're friends now. Are we?
Well sweet heart
Brods got a little attitude here digging yourself deeper big guy
I don't know why he's taking so personal offense to it rather a nice time. We're not
I'm having a punter. I have a good time fucking throwing his marriages me with your ductile over there You know, I'm about to be a pocket knife guy moving forward next time you guys see me out there in the streets
I'll be a a fucking PK boy. I'd like to get in some type of bet way of where you I get you have to get full lady cut
Like frosted tips and stuff like that feathered bangs feathered bangs. My shit looks tight
Dude my flow is sick. I don't know what you're talking about all right
All right. All right.
Sure.
But, I mean, I think you could use a cut too big guy.
I'm aware, I can use a little trim,
trying to figure out what I want to do with it.
I'd start with a cut.
I think I just want to let it grow.
I kind of have it in the position
where it needs to be to let it grow.
All the specifications are there. The length
of the side, the length of the top and the length of the back. So as it grows in, it'll
it'll all grow the right way. Sure. It's been pruned. Let's say that. Okay. Yeah. I've
been pruned. Sounds like it sounds like a fancy way. Is it even too lazy to get a haircut
between you and me? But hey, pr Wei, well, you're about my noodle.
No, it's also you're at the hair length where you look at cocktail from time to time.
I enjoy a cocktail.
Specifically, after a couple of shows, we'll go out, we'll get some cocktails.
Yeah, nice drinks.
That's when you get frazzled.
It's not that drinks, it's the fucking doobage.
That's when I go off the rails and then as your hair is longer
You grab it and you do I mean I'm making points
Hold on hold on go over. It looks like you got electrocuted. You look like fucking dog from back to the future dude
Yeah, now I agree with an idiot. Yeah
Yeah, but I think I'm gonna let it grow. Okay. Yeah, like how like I don't know
I know it let it grow. Okay. Yeah. Like how like. I don't know.
You know, it depends how quickly the weight keeps coming off,
because in the end I see myself with,
I love this, I love the ear this.
I see myself with longer hair and a nice beard.
Okay, so you want like actually long hair.
Like like, like you're gonna have,
like T-bones like down past my neck but it
wouldn't be it wouldn't be as curly it wouldn't be as thick okay and have it nice
and trimmed I was getting there but I was just getting too fat so fat obviously
that's what I'm saying if okay I'm trying to time it all out so you know okay
yeah I just I don't know if I try to time it off for like the next
50 pounds you know 50 pounds another 50 pounds off like long hair were you like talk behind
your ears yeah I was I was at that point last summer I could talk I was talking about my ears
yeah talk of my not that that wasn't long that wasn't like a long haircut haircut that was just like
That wasn't long that wasn't like a long haircut haircut. That was just like
What that was still?
Bull cut-esque no, it's bull cut. I had it going in the back. What do you talk? I could put it in a ponytail
It was that wasn't a long haircut haircut though
You know what I mean that wasn't like you we didn't like have it down here everything still went It was still a long hair that went bad. It's gonna go back. I'm gonna put it back.
I'm gonna put it.
I'm slicking back.
It's how I do it.
All right.
You don't like it.
I just can't see it.
I can't see it.
That's right.
You don't want the vision.
Maybe.
But that's what I'm trying to do is I'm trying to vision
down the road.
Okay.
As I make my preparations.
Okay.
Yeah.
All right.
Hey, to each the road.
I'm happy to. Thank you. I can't wait to see the stages of it.
Somebody commented I somebody DMed or something or a picture of you of the many iterations of H. Foley
There has been in this podcast. The shaved head the beard the shave phase the mustache. Sure. There was times when Earl
Like I guess later into the pandemic once with once toties once we were in the basement
mm-hmm you were going you'd come in bold one day long here the next day I've
spent in place yeah I can keep the fucking keep the tax man off your back I don't
know full I didn't fully hear that guy's gonna must keep the conversation moving in
the right direction but I like to do that I I do that. Okay. I do it, uh, it's more of a spiritual thing with me.
Oh God.
Okay.
Spiritual.
Sure.
It's when I feel it, you know what I mean?
A lot of times when we go back to the island,
when we go to Hawaii, you know,
I, that's a very cathartic experience for me.
I like to buzz it all off, shave it off.
I'm never shaving again.
I'm never making, never.
Never am I making that mistake again.
Yeah, it's not a great look.
Oh, anybody, really?
Unless you got a good jaw.
Yeah.
But not most people don't have great jaw.
No.
Everybody's got a little something.
I wish I was doing it my whole.
I wish I was doing it as a kid.
I remember I would, I would phone
to the peer pressure of Patty.
You're not shaving.
Damn.
You're not a shabin' or going to church. You're both in there shaving your mustache.
I dare you.
Now they use something back in the day. I don't know what the what what what they were using.
Nair was big. I remember my aunt Kathy white-off hair. My aunt Kathy using Nair dude. That had to fucking take years off of our lives.
Dude that had to fucking take years off of our lives sure sitting in there in a fucking small little house in the middle of the summer with no AC and just this chemical smell there was another thing like a train fell over there was a big big fucking
They got jammed up didn't they?
Is that no good? Yeah, yeah, did your wiping fucking hair follicles off your body crazy?
The one I think it was called Epi stop and spray
Was that it yeah it was epi stop and spray hold on Epi stop and spray
Epititis hair removal dude, and it was early two thousands
Same shit you put it on wipe it away early twos. Uh, same shit, you put it on, wipe it away. Early 2000s, they remember like the infomercials,
but it wasn't like a full infomercial.
It was like an infomercial commercial.
You know what I mean?
It was like a little longer than a regular,
it would run in a regular commercial block,
but it would be a little longer.
It wasn't like a 30 second spot.
No, I remember those broads from Prostatic.
They fucking moved merch.
I don't know that that is either.
You don't remember that to acne stuff?
Prostatic. Prostatic. know that that is either. You don't remember that to acne stuff? Prostatic.
Prostatic.
It was an acne medication.
All you kids were taking it.
You was a proactive.
Yeah, proactive.
It's a pro static.
Sounds like a DJ.
He's close up.
You take proactive?
Oh yeah, it ruins your hand towels.
Bleach is the shit.
I turn those women into billionaires.
Billionaires.
Billionaires.
They launched another thing, which I think
Juan's a pyramid scheme.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, shout out to them.
That's all like you sell to people type that kind of.
There you go.
Real cut-go-y vibes.
Yeah.
But that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that It worked they're like actually work. I think so. Yeah. Um, was it a wash or pill?
It was like a three step washing process. Yeah, like different stuff you put on, but the
bulls really know all these your skin would become addicted to the proactive. So then
the second you stopped doing it was just straight into face. Yeah, yeah, it was shot after
an ember. I'd say what they were doing. Yeah, give me a little taste. Give me a little
taste to what fucking of what Poon Tang feels like. Keep these nerds coming back. Sure.
What did you, did you have bad acne as a kid?
Oh, yeah.
You did.
Yeah, I'm my back too.
Oh, that kid was weird.
Look at you're taking steroids in junior high.
Ooh, what the fuck?
Oh, man.
Man.
Fucking crater face.
We had one friend that had it pretty bad.
And this is before all this stuff.
I think maybe you could get that as a prescription in like my error
Or they had some other stuff that you could get as a prescription because he got a crap didn't work
That's why it was like proactive was I felt like that was that the first thing that start like really worked for kids
You know what I mean and helped him out, but he would just rock them
Because his doctor told him, if you fuck with
him, you'll get scarring. And dude, he would roll in with fucking snow caps. I did. Go eat
over there. Like throw up my sl. Yeah. Uh, kick rocks.
Kid, let's talk about Adam and Eve.
Put something in your butt gang.
Woo, we ain't talking about your stockings gang.
Uh-uh.
Talking, it's Christmas time.
Do yourself a favor.
Get a little weird for the holidays.
Hey.
Get over to Adam and Eve.
Grab something, pick it up, stick it in,
stick it out, do whatever you want to do.
You could do it to partner or by yourself.
Whatever you choose or a group, whatever you want.
We don't know.
We're talking.
We don't have to spare a joke or any.
I mean, it's a good thing.
I mean, the best thing about it, I got the discreet ship in, you know what I mean?
Nobody knows.
No one knows.
Not like Santa rolling in with the sack and stuff like that and fucking do those hanging
out.
That's how you get GM Doc.
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It sits right on the nightstand on the counter.
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Ooh, who's got money for credenza?
Not me.
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Listen, if you're nuts, if you think every person in my family is getting an order of frames is all easy.
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Denise already has one.
I'm getting her one down to put down there in Wildwood so she can stay on top of the kiddies.
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fucking Apple stop and spread. I think it was the first time I actually, you
would see like, they would show a one day with the bikini areas, they call it as the
medical term, I believe, is the bikini area.
And they would show like, oh, don't get razor bumps, use Apple stop and spray.
That's all you need it.
And it was like, I remember like, I always pictured it was like a like a skin so salt like the like the bug spray. Oh that's skin so
It was like a similar spray bottle to that like a white bottle in that shape
And I used to slap it with that skin so soft. Oh
What the hell
Spanking it with bug spray
Couple citronella candles I'm trying to get in the mood here Dix away spanking it with bug spray. That's not a bug spray. I don't play the couple sit your Nellie candles
I'm trying to get in the mood here. That stuff was like it's not books. Please no, it's not it's skin so soft
I used it as bug spray because they found out that you could it's so hard
Hey, nothing soft about that. I used it as bugburg. Yes, because they found out that it kept bugs away.
But that just could have been some lady from Avan
that went to some lady's house.
That's good, Mark.
And it was like, you know what, it's good on Bugs, too.
Because it didn't smell great.
It wasn't great as a moisturizer.
But it did keep, I don't know,
that's what we were told to kept them as skeetos away.
Which I feel like back in the day,
we're doing a lot more mosquitoes around than there are now.
Here we go.
That's such an age-foli line.
There was.
Okay.
We just don't go outside.
Yeah, I mean, you're not right.
I'm active. I'm outside.
I hike, hunt, fish.
All right.
We've reached the line portion of the show.
I'm outside.
We'll go back to Foleyville gang.
Not nearly as much as you were a kid.
Why can't you just accept those facts?
Fine. Thank you. What the fuck? Why do you why do you you dig your feet in on these things that are just made up? I'll tell you why he's got to know what all box in front of him
See if there's more mosquito less mosquitoes now than there wasn't a night
This is one of those things you're right about but your thought process is wrong. I guarantee you. I'm right
Do they think they have a skater count, dude? Yeah, they know.
Do they want to census every four years?
Yeah, of course they know how many mosquitoes there are.
They just sprayed for something a few months ago.
I can't remember what it was.
I mean, I don't know how you do stuff like this.
He's right.
I knew he was going, it was one of those things he's right about.
It's crazy.
Of course.
Of course.
Less skaters.
Yeah.
If there's one thing I've learned in this show is there was a tie. I there was a time when you were wrong about everything
I remember you just pivoted and you're right about so much shit now. It's crazy. I read
Like books
Less mosquitoes now than there was
Yes, but this is according to PBS Wisconsin.
So I don't know.
I could just be.
That's public program.
That could just be in Wisconsin.
That could be due to all the fault.
You don't know that.
Check in Pennsylvania.
I don't live in Pennsylvania.
A guarantee there's less mosquitoes in Pennsylvania.
I don't see him when I'm down there.
I never see him in the city. Never see a mosquito.
And the only time I think we got bit by mosquitoes
was when we were somewhere.
Was it down in Florida or something like that?
I'm the Florida, forget about it.
From 1979 to 2022,
71% of the places,
whatever annual or whatever,
studied, experienced an increase.
I'm right.
No, experienced an increase in annual mosquito days
from five, about 16 days on average.
That's a rig, that's rig, that's a rig test.
We got the PBS Minnesota.
What do you mean?
That's who we're going with.
It's just from climate central.
That sounds made up.
Yeah. What else did they,
they probably got a ghost kitchen in there.
This is what Kippies write dot it work.
No, that's the first thing that comes up.
It seems like there's less.
No, increased temperatures and more frequent flooding events
caused mosquito populations to flourish
and provide conditions that could enable a non-native species
such as the Asian tiger mosquito to be more as that one.
Oh man, that's a mean-looking guy doing karate on you.
Yikes.
And I like that.
Yeah.
But I don't know.
What do you think, T-bone?
I got, you know, a lot of people are saying a lot of things about these mosquitoes, man.
Yeah.
Some are saying there's more, some are saying less.
Huh.
No, it's more.
Everything I'm seeing is more.
Damn, I should-
The mosquito population is a different- Should have walked away way from the table should I ended the show right there?
This is a different source mosquito populations have increased as much as tenfold
How can we don't see him that much?
When I'm when I'm down in paddies. I don't see mosquitoes. I see lightning bugs and I see a lot more lady bugs
Yeah, but you also have a protective layer of marble light around you
Yeah, it's true. Very true. The iron nose. Yeah, you have a Bernie atmosphere that they can't that they cannot penetrate
Oh the ozone you need over at the Foley House
seal this thing up
But I don't think skin so soft originally was a bug spray. Because I never the name never made sense to me.
Yeah, it was skin so it was supposed to be a moisturizer,
but I think they used it or I'm telling you,
one of these broads was sick of getting,
sick of striking out and not selling nothing.
They know it's also good for skaters.
For skaters.
And that was when everybody was playing Little League,
everybody had soccer games and football games
Were you an all family? Oh, yeah, yeah, I never I would I would rather I would rather I would rather fight the mosquitoes
Than have that stuff. You're crazy. That worked like a charm rub yourself in peanut butter
It's the one you smelled like shit. It was sticky. I love that smells like summer to me, baby
I hate it. I fucking hated it
Never I like we were also never a big suntan lotion. We were never a big
preventative
Product family suntan we dealt after we were in aloe. We were a fucking
Cat Camma. What is it Camma mealti? No
Campo,
Faneak.
What the fuck?
Hey, what?
No,
what was the Kalamine lotion?
Oh, yeah,
you said all the time.
Heavy and Kalamine lotion.
That was dry on.
Oh, man, heavy and fucking.
We were,
we were always dealing with problems.
We never got out in front of them.
Of course,
of course,
never sunscreen,
a lot of sun tan lotion, a lot of that
tropicana coconut stuff in the black bottle, the brown bottle, that smells like
hop rods, that stuff. I can rumble. Yeah, it was all right.
Man, Jackie, Master Manno or something like that, her maraschino was
cherries was the lifeguard at the at our community pool of town line.
And man, she would drown herself in that shit.
Oh, first time I saw a woman in the bikini.
Yeah.
There was this girl that worked the there to eat my choco taco that worked the sunglasses
on Uguin at her.
The snack bar at the at the my buddies swim club that he belonged to.
We went her name was Kendall.
First time I ever heard that name.
Man, she must have been,
think she was 18.
We were probably 13 or 12 or something.
That's it.
She might as well be 38.
Buddy, I ordered about 80 orders of chicken fingers that day.
Get some eyes on Kendall, you know what I mean?
I remember me like, that's a little water over.
That's a woman.
Yeah, dude.
So I'm being mom swimming in my shirt.
That's a tough place for a fact.
I didn't have to die with all your skin so soft on.
Oh, yeah, it was tough.
Calamine lotion. That was all right. Calamine lotion.
I died. That was for boys and I being stuff.
Yeah, skin irritations. Yeah.
Campofanique was a, it was an antiseptic.
They also have Campofanique, Campofanique cold sore medicine.
But back in the day, it was, it had a, it was like iodine.
It came with a dropper, but it wasn't a dropper.
It was just a little piece of plastic that went into it
and you would just rub it on there.
I do have a regular remember.
That seemed like civil war stuff to me.
Like you were getting ready to amputate an arm myself.
I don't know if I had dine worked.
I know, I had dine works.
Did it?
Benadine works.
I had dine the ground stuff.
That's iodine, isn't it?
It's benadine, it's a little bit different.
Cause I remember Patty was in on the ground floor of that
cause she worked at a professional facility that had doctors office. She used to come home
with like the surgical ones of those. Well, the ones they what they what they wipe when
they give you the like an eye that's Bennett. I always said it was I now. Oh, it's not
eye dines a little bit redder. I think the eye dines is a precursor to Benadine. You got
anything on that? All I got an eye dine is it's a chemical element. It's symbol one in atomic number 53,
the heaviest of the stable halogens.
I don't know any of that, me.
Is that a stable halogen?
Oh, yeah, the stable is, apparently.
Excellent.
It's good stuff.
Iodine medical use.
Okay, you both of you idiot tackin' away.
I don't know what I'm talking about.
Iodine is used to treat and prevent iodine deficiency.
What the fuck? And it's an antiseptic, yeah. Yeah. I'm telling you that's what it started.
And to look up benadine. That's the hot shit right now.
Everybody uses that.
They use that in my, uh, in my, my hoof videos that I like to watch now.
Oh, the cows. Oh, man, hit me. Give me some skin on that. Those are all right.
Oh, I've looked into it. I don't understand
About doing that about dip and do it. That is a career. Yeah, all right, so for the list of there's these things of
Yeah, like something a cow a cow or a horse usually can't like usually lives. That's like cows Yeah, they have a some sort of
Infection in their hoof that it's cracked and it gets in there gets dirty or a rock or something gets in it It causes a lot of damage and and the the I don't know blacksmith or whatever they are
It's not a blacksmith. Yeah, who blacksmith don't they aren't they the guy that who's people?
No, they they would make the shoe. Yeah blacksmith is on his iron work
Okay, I thought the blacksmith would make if he made the horseshoe you would put it on you put it on the horse
You got time to do that. He's making horseshoes's all day you go with third party a fairer a fairer those get those sharp
ass knives they're like the curved blades and they trim away they find it they clean it
and then they yeah they get down there then and then they they put a little pad on it and
wrap it up and they showed a nice little cow walking away that's so sad that's how good
is that feel can walk in poor little guys they, then they hook them up. They pull out like
a, like a drywall screw. Yeah. They care of them. Yeah. Have you ever seen like completely
unclipped like horse hooves or cat that like, like, cool, uh, yeah, like, like, like,
those wild like, Marriotchi shoes? That's where those things are nuts. They come up with
like, the cobras on the ends. Those guys are flexing. What are you an Italian waiter?
Get at it.
Yeah, I don't like that.
How do you drive in those?
Sorry.
Fucking three.
I didn't like that when when when that stuff hit really hard.
Those the longer shoe.
Sure.
That was your guys shit.
A little bit that That came back.
I couldn't afford, I wasn't, I wasn't dressing smart casual back then.
I never had anywhere to go to wear them.
I'd maybe get like an old pair from my brother,
if I had to go to a wedding or a funeral.
You weren't dressing urban chic.
No, no.
Yeah.
But I did those things sucked.
Uh-huh.
I hated those shoes. I always just took a pair of my brothers
So they were always a little too big to begin with
I was when they when they then they got longer when they fell out of fashion they fell hard
So I'd be wearing them the next summer
To something like what I remember one time was somewhere. I thought I was cool. I had like you know
My pair of express boot cut jeans on
that were like, you know, a little wider at the bottom.
I had some design on the jean.
I had a button up on white t-shirt under it.
You could probably see whatever the,
whatever flippers on.
Whatever the design was.
And I had the, they were long in the front,
but then boxed.
You know what I mean?
I hated the boxed.
The straight toes.
Yeah.
The squared off toe.
I hated that.
Look like a Marine's haircut.
Man, I ain't on M-Bam, M-Bam boys.
And-
Like run away, Elf.
My brother's buddy, Nikki.
Shout out to Nikki, pull me aside.
He goes, lose the square toes.
I was like, do I thought I-
Look at that, Legos on my feet.
I thought I was so cool.
He goes, lose the square toes.
Hey, Frank and Mary, get a pair of sketchers with you.
I dress, man.
That was a tough time.
I was in my early 20s.
It was cool to get dressed up, the button ups.
You went to like a cool bar.
I couldn't afford anything, and I was just always behind.
Always, always, always.
Always behind.
Man, now you're at the forefront of fashion.
Hey.
Clean hooves anyway.
Ha, ha, ha.
Oh, God.
All right, let's quit screwing around here.
All right, it's a family episode.
You know it, baby. as the homies and the Bose
Those know when you sign up for the old patreon there get a question read on here by Kippy and the fat man
Mm-hmm you a lion
All right, let's get into it. This is I just once from Travis shut out. I'll never had one red
Is it garbage? I've used dance dance revolution arcade game as your primary
source of exercise. I hate it. That shit. Couldn't do it. It's so jealous. They would get
cooking on it through so much shade at it. People work. That's what they were doing for
the night. Yeah. They were going out. I can picture a T-bone being good at it. Dance dance
revolution. Yeah. Horrible. Really? No coordination. How'd you do with like guitar hero in rock band?
I hated that shit. I hate it. That's it. Hit me the boy could track. I was melting faces. I'd whammy all that shit. That probably was popular
I'm from what from 47 now that became popular. I was early
15 years ago. I was probably 21
Okay, so you're I was in college. Yeah, I was like 18 to, 15 years ago. I was probably 21. Okay, so you're?
I was in college.
Yeah, it was like 18 to, yeah, probably 19.
So I knew people in their proper 30s
that like went and got that guitar.
What was that PlayStation?
That's right.
It was all of them.
Okay, went and got, and then got the rock band thing.
And then you'd walk in, you'd walk in as's somebody's house to buy weed or something you'd see or
Studio's weird drum kit sitting in the corner. I could fucking I was on the skins
Kid I was the dark going well I can play real guitar. So this is the new
Yeah, that's right, but can you play real guitar? Yeah, you should be able to know way. Yeah, yeah
I did not I got I got some chords in a pentatonic scale
Okay, but now I've I've I've been team oh, what are we doing dude? I fell on my wrist skating too much now
I can't hold it for more than 30 seconds my wrist hurts
First you are you're out
Step back there look pretty will you?
Yeah, I
Guitar hero is big. Also,
real dirt bag move. Shout out to my, uh, my friend of mine who
are renamed nameless, but re-name, re-name, will remain nameless.
We are riding around in my Chevy Luminum, my 95, 96, we
Luminum, I believe we're in college, okay? Rock band. So guitar
hero came out, that was just the guitar guitar and then there was rumblings of oh
They're gonna do it. They're coming out with the drum set. You know what the fuck that's crazy
so that dropped and
I was riding my boys Pat
Phil X and a couple other guys and I was going to have a car in the city. So I was trying to get a
Big screen TV or something right?
Which I remember we bought
the floor model and I was so in backers they were really beating them up over like 10 bucks for
the floor model so it didn't come with a box so we had a shove it in the back seat of my car
like already set up with like to stand on it and shit oh man tough look And my one buddy, he took rock band,
took the price tag off, covered it with like a DVD of like,
you know, I don't know, fucking one tree hill or something.
Sure.
Slap that on, it was traded.
That's your 29.99, took it up to the cash register.
And I'm like, and they bring it up and the guys like
2999 this isn't right this these are like five hundred ninety eight dollars
and my buddy's like okay I'll put it back and then just went to another cash register
and the guy went 2999 man that's real cheap he's like I don't know dude just
not gonna walk with it I'm like damn veterans day sale but I would I would have
fallen right at the, okay, yeah,
I'm sorry, I wanted to try it again.
He got right up on that horse, clean all his hopes.
So he got the kill.
Took him right out, baby.
And then you got a big screen TV and rock, baby.
Big screen TV, rock, bounce, set it up at the fucking house.
Look out.
And also at that same time, they had stadium couch seating.
They found a couch, they found another couch on the streets
on who's throwing out and they put it on cinder blocks behind the first couch nice man that
was the fucking thunder dome that place that's pretty sweet uh-huh but yeah never got into what
is it called dance dance revolution now well I respect the moves that all Scott Pilgrim did it
okay when he was on it when he was on it is it's just for a date with the, with the, with the, with his lady.
Uh-huh.
It also became one of those.
I mean, you're like comment on coming on a guy like that was like your buddy that you went to school with the fucking movie character.
It's in the movie.
I sure.
It's a good film.
Haven't seen it.
Really?
What about that?
Things that I'm into that.
You've seen it.
It's awesome.
Awesome.
Sure. Torre de Forrest. I'm into that? You've seen it. It's awesome. Awesome. Sure.
Tour de force.
I'm not saying it's bad.
Nice little cameo from that Chris Evans.
Oh, yeah.
Not like cup of tea.
My.
Captain America's the cup of date Chris Evans.
Guys, natural pleasure.
Okay.
Yeah, no, not my cup of tea.
You know this about me.
It's a good movie.
I never said anything bad about it
I just said it's not I'm on the road. I'll put it on in a Saturday afternoon. We'll watch you the guy now
I got you would get shorty. I'll get you with this get shorty. I've seen parts of get shorty. Yes, I have you also
Shout out to law. Oh fucking no. Oh, you guys keep the kids coming back. I guess show you some dance moves in there
Keep the kids coming back. I guess show you some dance moves in there.
You want to see a boy do the electric slide down the Wawa Iced Tea aisle hit me.
No, but that was that was order needs to go an extra mail. Perfect.
That was it. They were all kind of the same vibe.
Same understanding of like it's now a physical.
The video game is a physical.
There's a physical manifestation to the video game.
That that kids back into the arcade though.
So I like that.
They also, the thing that changed about that.
The big in Japan. That was starting to share.
Everybody's like, okay, same thing with guitar here.
It was like, it was like, this is fun.
I'm doing the dance. I'm one, two.
You're getting some exercise.
Well, then they hack it, and they're like,
you just hold onto that backfuck.
It was very like, you know, same thing with like guitar here,
where they've hacked it to be like, they're amazing at it. So it's either like, you suck, same thing with like a tar here, where they've hacked it to be like,
they're amazing at it.
So it's either like, you suck at it or you're the,
but there was no real middle ground.
It was either became like an expert.
This might be a controversial.
Or just be like your mom doing it.
This might be a controversial statement too,
but I always thought the Wii could kick rocks.
Hate it, that shit.
I agree, it never, it was cool. Also, the first time that you're
like, this is a such a unique thing to video. They already was hitting each other with those
remotes. Sure. With a bowling, I got to be honest. And I was playing it with like my 10
and eight year old necks. Yeah. They were all smoked. Yeah. They were all dicks about
it too. But dude, when we we bowling if you had like five guys
There was nothing really going on Tuesday night in the summer again. We were in college
Like I was nothing to do not go to the bar get like 230 racks and just a fucking bowl all night
Achimachi boys. I'm throwing rock tonight lady killers. That was a good time, man
God wearing bowling shoes
man. Got wearing bowling shoes. Slippin' on the carpet.
There was also too, I remember the first time Phil X told me that you just had to do this.
You know what I mean? Like you could play tennis and just do this.
Oh, not that true. You got to really wind it up as far as I'm concerned.
No. So dude, I was running into the walls and stuff and he was just fucking sitin' there
like that. What the fuck dude?
Keep it going back. I was like, I was trying to do me. It's like save it between my legs and stuff.
Yeah, like it had me running, baby.
Great question. Yeah. All right, let's see here. This one's from Justin $10 hoogie here. There you go.
Are you garbage if you crumble up a pop tart and put it in a bowl of ad milk and eat it like cereal? No. That's ice cream too.
That's a maze hot one ice cream. Chop it up, throw it over top ice cream or on the bottom.
You put it in the microwave for a few seconds and then
slap some ice cream on top of it.
Incredible.
That's a look that.
Yeah. I mean, that's more of a dessert, but that's the crumbled up.
That is cereal is fucking all right.
It's great. You can't get that. You can get the idea of ice cream on top of a warm pop tart and a
restaurant.
I mean, it's not a pop tart.
It's some sort of cookie or brownie or something.
Only problem is you would need more than one double bag of pop tart to get a bowl.
And then you're like that's heavy.
Sure, it has to be bite sugar.
Sure, it has to be a smaller portion.
Yeah, small bowl.
Pop tart ice cream sandwich would be incredible.
Great.
You know who does those?
Great, I've done it.
Really?
Yeah.
I've done everything you could do with a pop tart.
You make sure.
You make them and then put them back in the freezer
and they harden.
Yeah, it's pretty good.
Yeah, it's good.
I've seen it done.
Yeah, my only gripe, I say it all the time,
10% more filling.
Well, they didn't have the doubles, didn't they?
What?
I'm almost positive.
I didn't know that.
I could be wrong.
Or the XX, I feel like there was again, XX.
Great, you're thinking of Oryu.
No, I'm not.
Really?
That's just...
I'm just saying you don't think the people
and product development have thought,
I could be totally wrong.
It's, I feel like the the smores one had way more filling
Maybe didn't love those
That was they never really got there either. That was new age shit
The chocolate ones are the best the double stuff
Popup does not exist but there is a petition on change. Or there would go
There's only 118 signatures. I think we can bump
that up. Guys, yeah. I mean, if we could use
our platform to make better the
planet, positive change. It's just
it's it's not a you're not they're not
even that far away. I'm sure it has
something to do with, you know, then
you got to put then the calories go
up and then all that kind of stuff
because you have to publish all that
stuff when you have a big national
brand like that. sure, but I mean like a
Little squirt just a tiny. He need I don't disagree. I don't disagree
10% more of the the frosting 10% more of the thing
I think about the frosty was a little thin
Sometimes you get a bad one where they stopped a little too short
You're like feel like I'm eating fucking British cookies.
They make this on a Friday.
It's like, this is a quitting time.
Let's go.
This feels like one of those things that like when you look
at the corporate numbers on it,
it's like that increase costs them $1.2 billion.
Yeah, I can just tell you.
Well, they would make it up.
They would charge 10 cents at whatever it is.
They can all set the cost.
They already got the filling to a T-bone.
And those things ain't cheap anymore.
If you bought a pack of pop dodge in the last couple of years
I was heavy bike. I know it's during the pandemic really. Oh, yeah crazy
Seven eight bucks. I got myself some ego waffles the other night
All right, I used to eat them just plain. I come home from school. No one was home. We know to throw it in it throw to it in there
Oh, and there was so buttery. It was the best. I felt like I was being healthy doing from being honest
They said breakfast is the most important part of the day. Why not have a choice? That's what I'm saying
I was a scam what no shit that breakfast everything's a scam. Can't remember who it was it was like doctor Kellogg quicker
Oats are Kellogg quick or oats or Kellogg
Yeah, somebody yeah, they fucking just you know, it is a real important Greece the right couple of people
It's back in that day when everything was
Yeah, three guys could change everything Greece it. Yeah, Greece and wheels that you
Catch you the speakers or something like that. This one's just funny. Give me up.
This is from Long Dung Silver.
Is it garbage if a member of your family
was dishonorably discharged from the military?
Dot that dot.
He was set up by swear.
That's good.
I did know someone who was dishonorably discharged.
Really?
Yeah, family friend.
Yikes.
And I remember that's a real details.
Did I?
Do I have them?
Yeah.
Uh, yeah, it was something along the line of drugs. Ha ha ha ha ha so and so was dishonorably discharge. I'm like, what's that my mom?
Cuz you can't even get a job in McDonald's once that happens. Is that true? I don't know. I know I know it's frowned upon
I know I see you're not here for resumes not moving to the top of the stack. I don't know much about it
I would have never told anybody out of this of the stack. I don't know much about it.
I would have never told anybody. I was just, yeah, I got discharged.
What?
Yeah, I guess that was.
Sure, but it duffled back up pills.
Now, where you guys keep the drugs, yeah?
I guess probably back in the day before anything was
computerized.
I would just say it wasn't in the military.
If I had been- Well, the family knows I'm saying the family
Then all rats started running their mouths. It got back to you back to you when you get oh your ears stuff with echoes
Well, you get discharged. I mean if you join the military for four years and then six months later you're back
I'm saying I'm saying you just like now I'm the
I'm a hero that I was kicking too much ass. What do you mean?
I wanted to keep it fair.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Do you have lethal weapon running around?
Yeah, I don't know.
That feels like one of those things that you don't realize the ramifications for it when
it's happening.
It's like, just start.
I don't care.
Getting written up at a restaurant job or whatever.
Sure.
I was always like, okay, that means nothing to me
Yeah, then they when they bring you back in again, they got you they really do. Yeah, so I did I do
I was always told never to never sign anything. Oh, what a manager would write you sign and nothing
But then they would just fire you whatever
Fuck I care
I I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. No thanks. Body. Okay. When's Linda's start.
And fucking Jimmy Hoffa pin on.
Hell no, we won't go.
Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, they jammed me up with that shit.
They started getting wise.
I feel like at restaurants with that, especially corporate ones.
Because they'd be like, Doc, you all like doc, you gotta document everything.
Yeah, because they would give, like, you know,
some dirt ball, like 15 warnings.
And then they started like, all right.
Because then either, yeah,
they didn't have anything on them.
So they started writing it up and making you sign it.
I got, they popped me right as I started working
at Fairburn her for no reason.
I think I was like five minutes late.
Never a reason, that's a reason. I was no reason ever. I think I was like three days late.
I didn't think it'd just have one on me. Keep me keep me keep me playing ball. Fucking noses running.
You think you think there's a huge conspiracy? He keep you in line. I thought that's what it was.
Sure. Hot shot coming in. Hot shot. Don't in Remember you begged you I remember you getting that job to who'd I beg?
You had a friend the guy that got you the job. Yeah, that was you begged
Distorted reality shot up the Tommy. Yeah, yeah, he got it. He was a comic. Yeah, yeah. I remember you were like,
hey, God, I remember that was like, I was, I was, I was news and went into my fucking letters
back home. I was big fan might land the job at Bearburger. Things are looking up for the team.
Jammed up. Uh-huh. I remember the bird took me at the dinner after they hired me.
What? The Bearburger? When's that? When's that employee discount kick it?
I want to pay a burger. What's that?
What's that employee discount kick in?
How you that now?
I got up from the table just walked over to my other table with that.
Yeah, we're good.
We can order.
It takes 20% of the top of this.
Same team.
Yeah.
You had me in there for a free meal too.
Did you come in and have a meal with me?
Yeah.
No, with me, maybe sit there for a free meal too. Did you come in and have a meal with me? Yeah, no, with me, you made me sit there alone
like you were working.
Hey, though, which I'm looking back,
I never understood.
Do you remember that?
No.
Come in, come in, we'll have lunch or something like,
okay, I show up and yeah, I got a few more tables,
I gotta take care of.
And I was just sat there and had a burger
with like an asshole by myself.
Good, though.
I'd tip either.
If I can serve a stunk.
I once took a date to a different location of the restaurant I worked at so I could use
my employee to skill up.
Did she know?
She did not.
Yeah.
I'm a doctor.
I had to have a real discrete conversation by the Benzer Room with my server. And your restaurant job on your days off is any tough.
Yeah, I just, I just did a real trashy embarrassing thing.
I was recently back to your law off
thinking a couple of coffee.
Oh man, I'm going to see what's in the fridge.
I just fired up the old door dash, get a couple free fries.
I hated that place. They hated me too.
I was good until I hated it.
No, I was good there until it wasn't good and it got bad.
It's always the way it went.
It got bad. So quick. So quick.
It was always the moment where you were like,
you know what, this is all right.
I really like it here.
It's cool.
The next day it would start going downhill.
General manager got fired.
Oh, they're changing this.
They're changing that.
They're cutting back hours.
So everyone's gonna be running around like an idiot.
They would fucking always fuck it up.
Yeah, man, fuck.
Yeah.
But I was in Macy's and the girl,
man, it's one of the, it's like a dad joke thing.
She's like, how do you want to open up Macy's credit card?
Well, I was checking out.
I was like, no thanks.
I'm like, I forget exactly how I got in.
I'm like, I told her I'm like, I used to work at me.
I'm like, showing her, I know.
I'm like, I used to work at Macy's.
I fold those panties wrong, by the way.
You should be in your own your head.
That was very, uh, I still sniff all the bras before you put them up on.
What were you moving over there?
Were you moving doing that?
I was a men's Habadashir.
I worked in like casual men's.
Yeah, I worked in the, I worked in the Levi's section, killed that.
It was Levi's Nike.
My straight domicile was Levi's Nike.
And like it's just some other kind of random stuff.
Sweatpants, t-shirts, that kind of thing.
I didn't have, I had to,
You were an expert in sweatpants.
I didn't get a bone or an
Had to hide your chubby
I remember there's never as a kid in junior high a couple years ahead of me You like to push down and go over the ways under the waistband
I'm man. I remember when I found out you could go under the waistband. That was a life
Saver walking around with a loaded gun. Now you guys go ahead of me. I remember being in school under a desk.
Just like not me under the, but I added desk, you know, legs and groin area hidden by a
desk.
Thank God.
Just be like, please, looking at like six minutes left before the bell rings, thinking
about my grandma or something, trying to fucking talk this guy off a ledge.
Hey, where is's it man?
Now you go ahead on me you lunch.
Oh god.
Oh man.
Alright.
For best, best, best, best term I ever heard for a, a random erection was a nerve. A no excuse random boner.
Kids got a nerve.
Here I am sitting in class catching I catch a nerve.
That's not right, ain't it?
Nairt sounds like something bad from the game show. I'm gonna get you to the game show.
I'm gonna get you to the game show.
I'm gonna get you to the game show.
I'm gonna get you to the game show.
I'm gonna get you to the game show.
I'm gonna get you to the game show.
I'm gonna get you to the game show.
I'm gonna get you to the game show.
I'm gonna get you to the game show.
I'm gonna get you to the game show.
I'm gonna get you to the game show. I'm gonna the give me the acronym again. No excuse random boner
Kids got a nerve going there and I'm sitting in the history class
Man, that's all right. I think that was gonna hit me that hard nervous We're having a good time over here in this gosh darn person.
I'm sure you came out of nowhere, your honor.
I got a note for my doctor.
It happened at any moment.
Oh, yeah.
That was always, that always, I was a royal predicament and that there was what happened.
Yeah, Jamie.
You really had to.
Yeah.
Man.
Type of jeans, no one a longer shirt, you be all right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, that too tight a pair of jeans.
You needed something in the middle.
Yeah. Something that gets restricted, but not also, He needed something in the middle. Yeah, something to get restricted
But not also, you know, yeah too much friction also good to be a bit
Just get him angry putting on your shirt
That's disgusting carrying your school like a show, but I remind you
All right, let's see here. We got time for a couple more here.
Uh, this one's from Antotie's wet dream.
Uh, are you garbage if your dogs have health insurance, but you don't.
It ain't clay.
I mean, it's classy to have.
Are you guys have pet insurance?
No, that's a thing.
Yeah, we have it.
Really?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You do.
Uh, huh.
You got a policy on them?
Uh, huh.
I think a couple hundred bucks a year. and we've gotten our money back for sure
And then they cover it like almost every life insurance on them too
Whole things in his name. What are you talking about?
Poor little guy. You got his Paul friends all over this thing guys mark for it best. I've needed a full man
I'm um you got insurance she got insurance on them they say if you can do it when they're young
I think I honestly think it was like we did scratch pay when when when when the kitty cat wasn't
feeling good before the pandemic what's that it's like like a pace when you grab a scratch off
on the way to the back. No way if you can deliver time.
No nerve, no nerve, no nerve.
Damn it, two nerves in a row.
So riding on pot of gold, baby.
It was like a credit card for, you know, you get handed a thousand
dollar bill at the, at the vet.
Okay.
And they would, you, you would just start a scratch bay account and they would approve you
for a certain amount that you paid it monthly.
That's why I'm answering it.
Yeah.
Got you.
Interesting.
Wasn't that bad.
It was actually a good tool and it helped us out.
I'm just not fucking coming out of pocket 25.
I could, I was, I could enough. Sure. It's pretty pandemic. I was actually coming out of pocket 25. I could not.
Sure.
It's pre pandemic.
I was jammed up.
Yeah.
I think we did.
I think I honestly think it was like a couple hundred bucks for the year.
And now I just took him for something.
Oh, he swallowed bones.
I took him.
I had to go get a mixed raid.
I think I had to come out of pocket like 220. And then we the bird thinks care of it. She's on it. I ain't bad. She keeps her paper working line. They sent us a check for 195 bucks back 220's nothing 220's not like I 195 back.
It's written out the hunts my vet. I don't know where that shit fucking where where they're coming up with those numbers and they hit you. They come out with two printouts. This is what it looks like if you really want to,
you know, and this is if you just want to keep up appearances.
There's excuse the kids going to public school, alright.
You either go through with the surgery
or here are some sunglasses. I'm not gonna get it. I'm not gonna get it. I'm not gonna get it.
I'm not gonna get it.
I'm not gonna get it.
I'm not gonna get it.
I'm not gonna get it.
I'm not gonna get it.
I'm not gonna get it.
I'm not gonna get it.
I'm not gonna get it.
I'm not gonna get it.
I'm not gonna get it. I'm that's the classiest version of that. No, it's pretty good. Have you ever had anybody try to trade you a winning scratch
here? Can I give you this instead? What do you mean? Instead of cash. Oh, I've done that. Yeah.
You have. Well, like around Christmas and stuff when they're floating.
No, no, no, no, no, no. I'm saying, I owe you five bucks. I have a five dollar scratch off.
Here, take this. It's a winner. There's got to be more of a
That's the way I owe you three bucks for the legwork. Yeah, I need to wet my beak. You are wrong wrong. No, I'm not I'm coming out even right right
Yeah, I forget I'm not even earn interest on my money. Sure if I five bucks doesn't a bank and be 502
I've had people try to give me scratch else before. Sure, gift cards, I've listened. I've operated through a landscape of dirt bags.
I have myself have done the whole store credit.
Hey, you know, well, you can give you this, that,
a gift card, the whole nine yards.
Multiple gift cards, you ever get in that racket?
What do you mean?
That's a slippery slope.
What?
You got $3.51 on one gift card.
Yes.
$2.51 on another gift card. Well,
too. I mean, this is well documented, but I would get paid in those fucking MX my, my,
my, my Christmas bonus would be $50. MX gift cards. They give, they give me like 10 of them.
He didn't know them back then. You couldn't tell this kid shit from fucking December 15th through
January 3rd. That's exactly when I got it. It's a row in your face. I always got it around this
It was like the Chris this part was always like December 15th or 14th. There was nothing to shake a stick at either
They were like I think it was 800 bucks the first year. Yeah, and I think a thousand the next year or 30 years back down to 800
Sky rolled around with fucking like five two hundred dollar amic amics, too
No, they worked out the one year. I think they were all 25s.
I had like 1,400 of them.
And I remember I couldn't make any,
I couldn't make any, play it small ball.
I couldn't, I couldn't make any,
large purchase.
I couldn't buy any, I couldn't buy anybody gifts
until I got that.
So then I'd be there buying, fucking, you know,
video games for my nephews,
running through like a bunch of, you know,
$10 gift cards.
By the way, I just thought of this.
It is the holiday season.
Doop doop.
You know what's coming up?
The Christmas show.
You know what you're getting me?
I have some ideas.
Toby?
I'm gonna skip this year, I think.
No, the walker.
No way. What are you talking about? Although it did almost, I mean, you know, I'm gonna skip this year I think no
No way what are you talking about it almost I mean, you know you stink or even say in that it almost ruined the podcast last year Yeah, the episode mainly me
Yeah, that's coming up that's now. Let's go. I know I got some ideas
Bunch of coal I don't know what I'm getting Let's go I know I got some ideas
Bunch of coal I don't know what I'm getting
For me I have some ideas for you. Okay, you know, yeah
We'll see see how it all pans out. I'll put into cigar box again
I'm gonna get you the biggest most you were getting into cigars you fucking fat prick
I should get you some fucking veneers close those gaps. Oh, that'd be great I said a chopper you got you guys ship in to get me the nearest no you have money. Hey, don't everybody
Can you get them where they look natural running around oh, yeah, you can get them where they look natural
Yeah, yeah, just running around bucy face. Yeah, just get's just for a while. I live so I don't have meth mouth
Yeah, give me some chompers you guys can chip in get some wood ones like George lost
Taste like fine
Well, we got to wrap it up gang. Oh man, this was a fun one. Uh-huh. Love you, both.
Why?
Yeah.
What do you say it like-
You say it with a weird implic-
I love you, both.
Don't do that.
You're always always this weird emotional chess game with you.
Okay.
You know what I do?
Hold on, why would-
Okay, let's- let's hope that-
Why would you say that?
No, we- no, not that-
Because I was teasing Toby about his haircut in the beginning
Sure, but that doesn't imply that you didn't love him. I love you buddy. Yeah, that's like what you say after a fight
So I think which makes me think you've been fighting with us in your head
You better got it a couple of times
I tell you who I do love love you. Yeah, we'll see you next week. Hi
Love, love yous!
Yeah, and we'll see you next week.
Bye!