Athletico Mince - Boiled Parsnips 21: Sunderland Funeral Buffet

Episode Date: July 29, 2022

A bit that might not have worked, unidents, Dom, Mr Sting’s graffiti, Adrian’s birthday, and pain relief. (Rec: 19/9/21) Become a member at https://plus.acast.com/s/athleticomince. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello and welcome to Athetical Passnips. I hope you are all unflustered, relaxed and at peace with any errors from your past. I awoke this morning to a grating sound coming from me boiler in the basement. On investigating it was clear that the cold water pump was malfunctioning and an emergency plumber was required. At Joseph Company called All SsGoal with the catchy slogan, we're number one in the number two business. They promised me that their operative, Flush Gordon, would be there within the hour. Sure enough, about 40 minutes later, a Grev Van pulled up outside my door and Flush Gordon accompanied me to the basement. and pulled up outside my door and flushed Gordon, a company meet-to-the-basement.

I was dumbstruck by the smell of cack coming from his overalls and his lack of anything that could be described as a neck. He kicks the boiler with the toe of his cowboy boat then declared, Your boiler's too early for you, the whole system needs replacing and I reckon you need a new roof and all. I'll do it for 10 grand cash. Just keep opening it if it packs up, that'll be 500 quid. It was of course my co-host Mr Andrew Dawson. Oh Mr Plummer, smells worse in summer He charges by the minute, he's a waddling half-wit

Oh Mr. Heating, your boiler will take a beating His tools came out of a cracker, Face like a pensioner's neck. Yes, that's Mr Andrew Dawson, alright, I'm thinking. That is made out of a tea. Thank you very much, you did. Yeah, feel very honoured by that. Oh, I owe you an apology, Andrew, kind of just say first off. I did a podcast called Off the Menu with James Eirkaster and at some point they asked me, do you know anyone called Andrew? I can't freaking think of anyone. Yet, of course, the truth is one of the only human beings I ever speak to these days is you and you're an Andrew. So I apologise to that.

Apologic, except, I haven't listened to the podcast in question because it goes on for over an hour, so I would, but a few people did point out that and I wasn't too offended, they assumed you had your reasons, I don't want to know what they are but let's just put it behind us and carry on. I was at a funeral either day which obviously is a sad thing but it was also a joyous occasion as well afterwards, lots of laughs and all that kind of thing. The fella who we were celebrating and mourning was a fun of the podcast, so we'd appreciate it being mentioned. I want you to try and guess the buffet if you can. See how many items can seccute lovely, you can guess from a

Sunderland funeral buffet, Bob. Can I just ask was it a social club or a pub or a hotel? It was in a social club in Mill poor bar hotel or a social club and Mill failed. I don't know if you know that area of Sunland Okay sausage roll. Yes Chris. Yes Little bit more risky, but I think the might be pork pie as well in segments. Yes A tiny plate of salad.

Yes. Yes, yes, tiny. Right at the end. I wonder if the... Was that eggs? Was the boiled or boiled eggs? No, I'm afraid that your run of consecutive guesses was coming on the end. It was triangular sandwiches, chicken, tuna. There was spring rolls. You would never have got spring rolls with you. That's very exotic, isn't it?

End of the things that I can't quite remember, but there you go. You had a good go and you got quite a few rights, so well done. I enjoyed it, actually. I enjoyed it very much. I shall try and do some similar for you at my next Buffet attendance. I've got some questions from the wife and if you don't mind. Oh, that's good. Thank you. Yes. Hi, Andy, she says, is it true that in your fungolo, you are never more than one meter away from a soiled underpants or a bottle of blue drink?

One meter, did you say? One meter, yeah. One meter? I've got to say, yeah, to be fair, yeah. Yeah, it makes me quite far, isn't it? Yeah, it's a small fungalow, yeah. You know how I thought one? Andrew says the wife.

When you do your weekly rodding of your toilet, do you alert just your neighbours or do you also get the army involved? Tee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee- Just the nervous, just the nervous. Just the nervous. Yeah. Thank you for indulging me in that, Andrew. That's the end of the question. I've got a couple of names for you. If you'd like to choose one. Good one, then. You can be, obviously you can be honky tonk if you want.

You can be stretch heartbeat. Who as a man who can stretch out his heartbeat to six per minute through self hypnosis That could be useful for you. We are heart condition I haven't got time to ask how your health is, but I'll continue or you can be Richard shit list Anyone who wrongs him he says I'll put him on me shit list He has no shit list and he himself is a massive shit So So he can be rich. Is he dicky shit list? Dickey shit list, you can call him that if you want. Yeah. Thank you very much.

And you will be going on me shit list. Would you like to call me a massive shit at this juncture? You have none of that for a while? Oh, Andrew, yes. You are such a massive shit. Thank you very much. I cannot tell you. And now I've had to go with something, Andrew. Andrew, yes, you are such a massive shit really. Thank you very much. I cannot tell you. And now I've had a goal with something, Andrew,

which is touching goal. We'll see how it goes down. Do you want to do it earlier? Do you want to leave it till the end? I think we should do it early. Going early. Like we actually believe in it, yeah? I think that's a good idea,

because this is a past nips episode. It's for the hardcore listeners and bay There are many other many where so yeah, and that might be a bit more forgiving. So yeah, okay So the lovely lads in finnety rocket plastics got me a tapped phone call between Mason mount and Jack Grelish Which is quite a scoop. I think you'll agree And in fact actually I should give most a thank him, to be honest with you. I'll just do that. Do-do-do-do-do- I just wanted to thank you for the greelish phone call, Wav. No problems, Sinificato. It was a simple reverse turtle hack into their

mind frame all hidden under the cloak of a digital headscarf known as a clammy fig. All right, so you're busy at the moment, moose. Reasonably, I'm busy taking down the mind frame with spec savers. Oh yeah, why are you doing that? Oh no particular reason. Look I've got to go sub-bub with of the forest. I've got a macaroni cheese in the microwave and it's just ping-a-thed. Go boldly my leash. Okay see you most thanks again. Right I'll look I'll just play the phone call. All yeah alright so I think Jack's Jack's the one of the first speaks all right maize Jackie yeah would you up to be do what have you

got this do you want to do basin I haven't got it no you didn't send that part so you're on your own all right Jackie in it I'm just playing a bit of red dead redemption on my PS5. Our love that game it's busting, what horse are you riding baby? The brown and white ones very pretty, but frisky, very pretty though. I'm on a white horse in it, white horse, it's very powerful and rapid but you know it's nice and dull so isn't it? Oh that's a great choice of horse, Babby. Listen I was just wondering what you were doing on your day off tomorrow. Oh ain't no plans yet really in it your fancy doing some at the gather. That's he's gone to your the only

matter. Yeah that's terrible isn't it? Yeah that would be great Babby. Do you fancy going into the town center? We could hang around Maccadise or funny about on the lips in the multi-story. Santa, pick him in. So how you thought it would sit there and sit there? Is he so much fit? How come now?

He's what? Has he been so much fit? How come now? No. It's different, you know, but can't at the same. Do you know what's a mean, baby? Do you mean like I Geody again? Do you mean like I'll I should have sent you this to do it Andy? Well, you mean he's like Cockney any

No, do you mean like oh? God you love to be Geody. Do you mean like I'll come up fish fingers or the same as birds eye but not the same as well? Yes that's right baby they're very subtle taste variations between the two brands but it's kind of the same thing have you made any friends at city in it do you now feel fowden? Yeah the one with the herb at haircut, innit? Yeah well I asked him if he wanted to go and get some tattoos the other day but he said he was too busy helping Kevin De Bruin paint his front door. Too bad innit, did you get a tattoo? Yeah what did you get done? A speed honking to Patrick! Sounds mega, so no new friends then.

To be honest, Bebe, there are a bit of a bunch of piss-takers. Always having to go at me air-style. They call me things like the Magic Mushroom Pork Chop, which are down to understand, because if it looks like any cut of meat, it's definitely a rack of lamb Jackie Collins and maid Marion which is deaf because you know I never go into forests because of the numerous trip hazards. Life can be cruel in it bro. Listen you want to join my WhatsApp group?

Yeah busting do I ever babs who's in it? Me obf me ma'am in and it Callum from the go kart place and my girlfriend, Hayley. Well, she's not my girlfriend. Yes, send us in, in what? Hi, to the England-led 7-9 for me. Not really. Go on, tell me, are you best friend?

Michael Douglas. What was that? I don't get it? You know, cause you keep falling down, like the movie. I don't know, yeah, that's fair enough. Hey, I'll see you in the morning then, Bobby. Yeah, now worries, innit? That was it.

I mean, I don't know, it might have worked. I don't know. I'm probably too close to it, do you know what I mean? I'm glad that I wasn't involved though. Yeah, I think. I mean, I'm grateful for that. Yeah, but... I picked a bad name with Mason now.

I'm not idea. I just think maybe the past nip was going to just leave a comment under the episode on the Patreon page and just say, yes or no, according to whether they thought it worked or not. Would you like to play East or West? Yes, yes please. Okay, here we go. Welcome onto East or West. I'm joined by Bob Mortimer today.

Bob. East. Or West. Ooh, I have a think. Take your time. East or West? I am not at east. Can I ask you what your thinking was behind that decision?

I didn't think it was west. You just almost a gut reaction, if you like. Almost a gut reaction, yeah, just from my experience over the years. Right, you know. Would you like the opportunity to change your answer? No, don't do that to me. East. Are you sure? Yes.

Bob, I'm sorry, it was West. It was West. It was the dress code at the East East India Club in St. James's Square London against a West Highland Turia. So... Right. Okay, yeah. You might saw that.

I thought you might saw that. I said it on that. I thought it was obvious, but there we go. Again, you've lost, but thanks for joining in so much. No, thanks for having us. Please, first as Restpob. Should we have a look at some Unidence that have been sent in by the person that was Bob who can assess them and award Unidence to this if appropriate.

Okay. I've got one here from Tim who says possibly Unident, recently witnessed a seagull get hit by a double deck of bus. Oh, that's the shim, taking pity me and Marley my dog walked over to move the pole, but out of the road and into a gutter like resting place. So my surprise, it got up and looked around, then flow off, is that a unident? Well for me Andy, recently witnessed a seagull get hit by a double decker bus, that's fine, that's enough for me what for this unit dent you think for me yeah is it something you're familiar

with seagulls written double-decker buses I've never seen it up and I may seagulls don't get hit by vehicles quite often I think they'll say them lying dead in the road but I wouldn't give that a unit dent. No, no, not at all. The fact that it got up and flow away. Don't come to give a fuck. Come to give a fuck, Bob. Oh, well, if it's if it's not unanimous, then that's it's not given. Sorry, sorry Tim. Here's another one from Kate. He says, I run a cake business and I'll always split my supermarket shopping into anything I can claim as cake related, brackets, milk, oil, and anything that isn't,

brackets, tuna, mouthwash, then peer for the two lots of shopping separately. I say what's happening here, there's a business purchase and a personal purchase happened side by side. Which says I've done this several times a week for the last 10 years, for the first time ever. Both lots of completely different items came to the same total of £7.20. Is this a unit dent? The young lad at the checkout

didn't seem that interested. Well, the young lad at the checkout is definitely wrong, because it's certainly interesting. Fascinating even. I'd certainly grant it status of facident fascinating incident. Fascinating. Well what are you thinking? I mean I'm gonna give it as a unit then I mean the fact that she's doing two sets of shopping at the same time in itself is unusual so that bolsters its qualifications as a unit then and then for them both to come seven- nine, 20, but yeah. Now I think it's probably very common in the business world, Andy, to do two shops.

Oh, I don't exist in the business world, Bob. I don't know about these things. I can only talk about what I know. Well, your ignorance is no reason to hand out unit and select right and send to. All right, well, we'll just not give it. Okay, anything else? There's one more.

I'm going to bother. I will. It's some con of Matthews. I recently went to Stanford for the deer for the first time and visited the Stanford Chey shop. That's where you were, isn't it? That's where I was, yeah. In the shop I heard someone discussing pollen bob's trip there in the fishing show. That's not really relevant. Turn turn around and it was my neighbor. Oh, it is relevant He'd never been a stumphid before either and it's an hours drive for both of us

I looked in his basket and he bought four of the same five cheeses as me. Is this a unit? Well, I think it's got to be on it I think it's got to be on it. I think it is Traveling and I was then finding yourself in the set's trapped with a name Yeah, and he's never been there before and then you buy in the same chasers I mean if even which been two of the same five chasers, I would have given it. Yeah, that's rock solid unit dent for me that one It's given then. Well, that's nice ones got through Granted. Granted. Yeah. I'm not going to look too and have a wish out on the dumb pod.

With where he do with the little woods. Well especially yesterday on the podcast yet again. It's Mr. Bob-Bub-Bub-Bub-B for mentioning it. Yeah, yeah, anyway, I'll be watching it. I've got one question in there. Have you ever caught a duck before we stank and then I destroyed a film? No, we never caught a duck. I've never caught a duck before. I've never caught a duck before.

I've never caught a duck before. I've never caught a duck before. I've never caught a duck before. I've never caught a duck before. I've never caught a duck before. I've never caught a duck before. I've never caught a duck before. I've never caught a duck before.

I've never caught a duck before. I've never caught a duck before. I've never caught a duck before. I've never caught a duck before. I've never caught a duck before. I've never caught a duck before. I've've got one question about that have you ever caught a duck what was steak and then I destroyed the film no we never caught a duck just for a share all right could I come on the show one time no thank you the dumbest okay I'll just go on the river back across the other side and

just walk the log no it's all right Even though I'm there. Nope, no thanks, Tom. I'll drive myself there. Now expenses required. Just 10 seconds on the screen, that's all I want. Yeah, we've finished filming them now, Tom. Maybe I could sit in a tree, so we'll load it. Well, it's honest, it's okay. Oh, I'm moving on.

I've got to do a little advert at this port. I'll load them by. This podcast is brought here in association with Cushydend. The best favourite record there is Cushydend. There we go. What else do we go to? Bob Bob, have you got a favourite month of the year? I like the month that we're in now September. Yeah, what's it? Yeah, you get a bit of surprise sunshine, you know, and it's not too hot, not too cold, I like it a lot. You're actually favourite, is it?

Yeah, I reckon. I ain't got one. I'm on the fence when it comes to favourite mumps on the bovard. Okay. I like them all equally. Are you ever having a silk scarf? Oh. I've had some silk socks once I remember, but no I've never had a silk scarf. No, I mean either. I was just fricking a getting one and I saw the one and if you could

recommend them. I can't but give it a go though, don't go back. I'm not sure if I can get one more, I can take a bath and don't like it. Um, yes, yes, if it all we go time for, all right, on the dump food. It's been a enjoyable, thanks very much for joining me, blah blah blah. Thanks for having us dumb. Pffft.

Pffft. Jody heats. Crime on the time. Hot Jody nights. Jody streets full of crime. Jody heats. interior jordie heat incident room di bruce is talking to pc welch at a desk I hope you haven't forgotten about our little private training session this morning

Denise, you of course not inspector I can't wait, I've got a sausage, and a flusker bovral all nice and warm in me hot bag. I'd sound smash and Denise, I've bought a couple of almond magnums for afters, I can't wait to see you later. The phone rings, and is answered by a PC Denise Welsh. Hello, you have throat a jordy heat, fighting crime on the time, how can I help you? Somebody or something has done graffiti on me, Bann. Where I keep me out of packers. Okay, slow down, pet.

First of all, tell me your name and your address. What does that even matter for? I didn't do graffiti. More likely it was an assort of bagsy. If it was, if it was then you'd never catch it because it strict me anonymous, you know like that, man. Listen, I need your name and address so we can complete a crime sheet.

But, ignore it. It's least distinct from the massive house where the massive drive and the massive garage is. Oh, hello, Mr. String. So, when did this happen? Well it wasn't there last night when I fed the alpacas! Alright, oh yeah what do you actually feed them? Corkenut, mangoes, berry berry cuss cuss and trodys special mix!

Oh yeah, I was in the special mix, carn cobs, back bacon and wafers and beans. Everywhere what's I can't do with catching the graffiti bastard produces you lot. Okay, less of the attitude please Mr Sting. Oh sorry about that. Now can you describe the graffiti to me? Well it's like something a child would do if the child was insured like, because its man was infected by the spirit of Bongo or Fog and clown. I do sound a bit like that, Banksy bloke, don't it? You'll need to send a squad car around Pronwo to...

...fingerprints and supples to send her lab, and I insisted I come along to the lab. I love the boundaries of me, especially when they're in the countryside. Mae'n gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r

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gweithio gweithio gweithio gweithio You are, do you like it? It's very top-provoking. So, Jordy, what man, it's okay. It's one of Trude's ad projects. You don't need to send no officers. And can I just add, I'm very disappointed with the service I have received. No, I won't be responding to any feedback service. Good bag. The phone hangs up and just then PC Carol Beardsley walks into the squad room and goes over to Denise. Mae'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'r gwybod yn gallu'n gwaithio'r ymwch yn prydceth. Mae'n gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ymwch yn gwaithio'r ym'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r fwy'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r i'r like no carol the training sessions with Denise or sadly Denise has come over

with a headache haven't you pet or I that's right yeah it's a right eggy thunder bastard so I've stepped in if that's all right, forking by you boss! She heads off with DI, Bruce. Have you got any sausage rolls, Carol? Better than that. I've got a 12 pack of scotch eggs and a flask of hot egg nog. Oh, great. A canny wait. Another compelling episode. In it, no. In it, compelling. Speaking of pain and headaches and all that, we, we had a correspondent from passing

up a Tony Boydell who asked if Martelorans could provide his top 10 methods of pain relief. Oh yeah. So I passed that on to Martelorans so then he got back to me with the following wav. And my glaring Saturdays about a top 10 pain relief methods. Number 10, heroin, not a fan personally. Number 9, meditation, again, it's not for me. Number 8, there is no number 8. Number 7, alternating,

cold and heat, compress. Number six, just walk it off. Number five, yoga, Barbara and I regularly done our leotards to help ease some of the strains of aging. Number four, paracetamol. Number three, massage. Number two, just pretend it's not happening. Number one, method of pain relief for my south is a bed of one bottle of scotch whiskey.

Thank you very much, I hope that was helpful. It's very nice of Mark to do that, why not? Laurensson, yeah, very mixed list there. to do that one at Lawrence and yeah very very mixed list there. So Andy I was up near the Ali Pali the other day, get some oil from my ragone you know for its triggering that. So popped into slot as a grab to sit in a booth near the door. Sure enough as always Adrian Lewis turned up and was greeted by the waiter yeah I tell you what happened.

Good afternoon sir, am I correct in understanding that it is sir's birthday today? Oh yes yes you very much are, yes. For a good sir, we have prepared our outstanding birthday service for you today. What sir I'd like to be adorned with the ceremonial crown. Oh yes please yes yes, stick that on me right to where you celebrate a hero and the way it gets some tongues and produces like a crown made from rib you know rib bones and a big pot of bubbling sort of grease. It might be a tad hot around your skull but you'll find that some grease will soak trigger down into your eyes and possibly

even your mouth. Oh, oh, oh, you, fucker, that hurt so good. Let us guide you on another sea of delight in this most special of days. Look, look, cut out the fancy talk and just tell me what I'll be having. So, Vulcan, sorry about that. Continue. For your status, we will charm and delight you with a selection of vampire bat-fet-locks. I've coaxed it all. Of course not, sir. They are very much raw. Oh, I can almost feel them getting lodged in the gold teeth as we speak. For your birthday, man, run crags presents his personal gift to you, his special five rodent penanza, to be enjoyed blindfolded, were strapped into a massive bubby's hage.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, tell me what special about it. It keeps it in the fridge before it cooks it. Oh, God, half. Ah, y'all fuck half. And if I deserter, you'll be getting two scopes of ice cream made from air-pilk and drenched in a secret sauce. Oh, fucking love secrets, me. Tell me more, you're handy to art.

Some people say the sauce tastes a bit like fairy liquid, but that's because it's fucking is. Hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on, fairy liquid isn't meat-based. Well, round crags describes it as a necessary palette cleanser sir. Just then, round crags themselves staggers out from the kitchen. This is the one? Yes, Ron. And sings happy birthday to Adrian. Would you like to hear how it went? I think I would, yeah. Yeah, this is Ron.

I'll be birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! And you know what, and I felt a bit sick after that, and I've gone out of there. That reckon that's about everything we've got for this one. Yeah, that's been a happy with what we've achieved, Bob. Well, you know, we'll let it settle for a while, I'll get back to you on that. Yeah, oh just before we go. Do you reckon PGM don't gonna still get in ready to rumble?

Oh, no. I don't think so. I mean, it was like, it was about 27 years ago, I mean, the just characters played by Alton Deck, you know, they've moved on. Yeah. Or, I don't know, something to think about, supporters, isn't it? Something to think about, and you know, we'll think about that. So, thank you, um, uh, Nippers. Thank you for your support and see you next time. Thanks Pass Nippers, bye bye! you