Athletico Mince - Ep. 116 - Woodland Lute Ordeal

Episode Date: September 16, 2021

A turkey stew, Geordie Heat, smoke, Steve and Casper sing, medal woe, and Martin visits the Beardsleys. Become a member at https://plus.acast.com/s/athleticomince. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello ladies and gentlemen and welcome to Athletic Olmints. I hope you're who the bag drois well stopped and you're staircase plump and de-gritted. Imagine if you can, that you are receiving a relaxing back massage at your local High Street Wellness Centre. Sitar music is playing in the background and the smell of exotic essential oils is drifting around the room. You can feel the stress and tightness leaving your body. You close your eyes and imagine you are lounging on a sandy beach in Mauritius. Suddenly the door of the room bursts open. It is the owner of the spa, a squat-retuned

plop of a man wearing only football shorts and cowboy boots. Oh, you have to get out here quick! The cops are on the way for a raid for Muni Lodgen. You don't want to get dragged down with what? It is of course my co-host Mr Andrew Dawson. Oh Mr. Griffitha, he's a massage trickster. Oh Mr. Londry, his life so tall tree oh mr. hand oil face like a gargoyle oh mr. puddles heading for prison curtains so that's a little money laundering operation. No comment. No comment. It's an allegation and that's all.

Okay. How were you today, Andrew? I'm alright. I've got a slight problem in as much as at some point during the night me dog hearing it on me toolbox. Don't know what I meant about that. How did you know was it just a visually apparent? I did you smell it? It was visually apparent. I went in the kitchen this morning, yeah. Yeah, the toolbox is there on the floor.

Well, it had either leaked urine from inside the toolbox or the dog had pissed on it, so I don't know. I wasn't storing any urine in the toolbox as far as I remember. I was gonna say, I wondered if you had any urine capsules in there. I can't think that I had, So I'm pinning on the dog. So I don't know, what do I do from that? Was there anyone else in the house? There wasn't there was just myself.

Just yourself. Or it's either the dog or a ghost. Yeah, maybe the dog. Can imagine your handiwork from your so-called toolbox is a bit shabby Andrew. Maybe the dog's trying to discourage you, you know what I mean? your handy work from your so-called toolbox is a bit shabby Andrew, maybe the dogs trying to discourage you, you know what I mean? I was repairing me oven door, you know oven door, like it's got like a sheet of glass on the inside to protect the outer glass, that's come loose

and I couldn't get it back in, I was trying to repair that. This is really interesting, isn't it? I always assumed you've just had an open fire, you know, with bits of junk that you burn in it. But there you go, you've got an oven. Yeah, well, kind of, it's not really working anymore because the glass has dropped out, but... Well, when you turn it on... It's full, does it stink?

Yeah. Yeah, nice, Andy, nice. Chh, how are you trying? Have you ever tried one of those oven bombs where you just put the cleaning bombing and just leave it in it, just cause pff, it cleans the whole of the inside of your oven. In like four bombs.

Yeah, I mean, I'll deploy any kind of domestic bomb. For heavy business. You can bomb months and insects, can't you? You can put in bombing. You can bomb fleas and things like that. Yeah, and you can also bomb the inside of your oven. Yeah. So two residential bombs, perfectly legal, very enjoyable. Yeah. So the wife's question is Andy. Hi Andy, she says, as always, Hi Mrs Mortimer. Yeah. When you are waddling around B&M bargains looking for a 64 pack of thin bog roll do you ever stop at the long life ready meal selection and

salivate onto the floor for a couple of hours? Not a couple of hours no no. Why do we do that? No I mean I just make me. I'll just get like a beef curry. I'll sum it like that and just proceed to the check out. So, I'm all first. Yes, there'll be a little bit of salivate. And obviously, who doesn't? Okay. Thank you. Andrew, do you change your underpants every month?

No, I did. Or just wait until they crumble and flake off into your tracksuit bottoms. I don't want to answer any questions about um, you're on these, but look below the weirdest act of it. Okay. So I respect that. Andrew, is it true that your famous macom stew has only two ingredients,

70% water, 30% turquoise mint. Is that sure? That's the way. 30% seems high. I'm gonna say yes, I'll wear that with pride. Yes, it is. It's lovely, do you let all the water evaporate? I'll keep it quite thin.

I'll keep it thin. It's more of a soup than a stew. Yeah. Is that the end of the questions? Yeah, that's the end of the question. You've been joining them, no? I've got one question for you. For me, kids, just one solid question.

Bob, Bob, they say, do you think you'll ever be able to control yourself when you've got a fish on the end of your line or will you always just jump about like a duff funny. I think the time will come when I will relax a bit more, you know, but you don't know how many hours have gone into try and get a fish. So it's always, you know, it's very exciting. It's an exciting thing. I know, but can you not, you know, learn to control yourself a little bit it'll help I'm not a fishing expert but it'll help in terms of you know reeling it in

You're not a fishing expert. You know I got some not Well, I apologize if it's irritating your children Yeah, the question yeah, no, that suspect it is a bit irritating, but we can only show what happens can't we? Well, you know. That suspecter is a bit irritating, but we can only show what happens, can't we? Well, you say that, but, anywhere. I've got an exciting episode of Jordi Hane-Dro. What'd you think of that? I'd love to hear it. Okay, here we go.

I hope you enjoy it, darling. All right. Jordi heats, crime on the time. Alright. Jody Heats. Crime on the time. Hot Jody Knights. Jody Streets. Fuller Crime. Jody Heats.

Interior Jody He Heat HQ. Dirt time. The phone rings and it's answered by DS Denise Welsh. Hello, you threw this Jordi Heat, fighting crime on the time all nice and cany-like. How can I help you out of the day? Oh man, not new again! A pardon, sir. Nothing, I was just saying, my roots are in pain, there's nothing you have business.

No problem, sir. Now, can I take your name, please? It's me, Mr. Sting, from the massive house of one, our massive estate, with the three massive garages. Oh, hello, Mr. Sting. How can we help you the day pet? I need a to report a burglarization at the massive house.

Someone's been in and stolen all the balls off me snooker table. I haven't been out in the house so they must have done it what I was busy eating me golden gramps. Oh dear, is there someone there who can help you look for them? No! True, he's out in a powerful spot car, buying sunbags cause there was a flood on the telly. And I don't know what to do on my own like so.

You need to send all your best coppers straight away and take some fingerprints, settle the police Gordon. If you don't mind I might have to throw it if you don't I might have to throw me massive going out of the window and then I'll right okay try and keep cam Mr. Sting have you looked for the

balls or can't because of the stolen what have I been made from gold man okay calm down are you near the because I've been stolen. What have I been made from? Gold man! Okay calm down. Are you near the snooker table now Mr. Sting? I'm sitting on it so I can't call the chair that away as well. All right how big is the table? I don't know for a new or massive I'll tell you that. Massive, I'll tell you that! All right, can you have a look in one of the holes for what? What for? I've never used it before!

They've got like nuts on them, I've picked up a catch and flowers and tableworms and that! Just do it nice and slowly. Give it a go, don't rush it. Okay! I can see them, even a go-one! Mae'n gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweith The bodies will be off where I'm the county by now. Okay, Mr. Sting. Now, I think it's best to leave you to get on now. Hold on, Mrs. So, what are you doing up to work?

You'll have to run in me super car. It's got massive wheels and engine makes sparks if I put it in the super thrust. Try that to sound exciting. I'll focus on this. Okay. Okay then Mr. Sting, pick us up at Jordy, heat HQ, about 530. Shall I bring my loot? No, that's all right, Pat.

Okay, see you later and make sure you don't come on your own. Cut to remote woodland clearing. Denise is sat on an old tree stump. You sure you do come on your own? Cut to remote woodland clearing. Denise is sat on an old tree stump. Strang is playing as loot. I thought you said you wouldn't bring your loot? No I never. You said bring it, but I said I wouldn't.

And it was a cave your chap shot. Or I'll leave you here in the forest. What is full of werewolves and that sort of shit. Here's me song. She was a strong new maiden with walnuts in her. She never had the hiccups. Oh, got sad, beached by a bear. She wore a golden necklace and had a pizzeria sack.

And no, it was bent in crooked. She had warts all down her back. Oh please Mr Sting stop it I can't stand the sound of that fucking loot it makes me spank here I don't know which more of it I can take. Oh there you you are getting right there my nerves that's it I'm going to abandon you to the werewolves and all the other sorts of shits. No, please don't leave me here with all the sorts of shits. What not about here, please, Mr Sting.

Don't be mad, mead up. Perhaps you shall call those youses, bastards at Johnny Hate. Good luck with that, like, they never helped me. I don't allow you. Suddenly the sound of the Johnnyy Heat Mo'pad is heard revving into the clearing. It skids to a halt and off steps, DI, Steve Bruce.

Watch out, boss! He's got a loot! All right, Mr Sting, don't do anything stupid. I want you to slowly, very slowly, put the loot down on the floor and don't you dare strum it or you'll refer it. Oh God not you how did you even find me you normally useless. Never mind that just put the loot on the ground and step away from it. Sting does as he's told and leans dejectedly against his supra care. Oh thank god you came boss, I don't think I could have taken much more. I'm just doing my job pet. How did you find

me by the way? I will PC Shelby bought a load of tracking devices off the dark web and I've had them installed in their every office's hat when I saw that you were in the forest Yn gweithio'r ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch Why won't anybody listen to me? Look, music! He's very upset, isn't he? All I'm trying to do is make people happy. I was chooding up a barred from me. Here, come on, Mr. Sting. You're deaf, dear Beth. I'm in no rush. Why don't you plers a few tunes before we get off? Really? Do you mean it? Yeah, not just kidding. What's on? No, we'd look here a few few tunes, come on off you go. Alright, here you go.

He was a noble copper, a comagetie with hair, his slacks beneath his belly, he had a terrible load to bear, his lassie was so pretty, with a book on her boot, and at some say in the forest they listened to me on me loot. Close up of Denise and Bruce's fingernails digging into the bark of the tree stump. Oh! Jody, what then heates?

Music So that was a long e, sorry about that. And the... Oh, that was alright. That was very long, but it was very high quality at the time. Music Would you like to play a... Can you smell smoke?

Yeah, go on then, I like that. It's difficult. Oh, give it a go. Here we go. Welcome along to Can You Smell Smoke. To this contestant is Bob Mortimer. Welcome along Bob. Hi, thanks for having me. Bob? Not yet. I haven't said it yet. Bob? Bob? Not yet. I haven't said it yet. Bob? Yes. Can you smell smoke?

No. I can't smell smoke. You're saying no. You're saying no. You can't smell smoke. You're saying no. You're saying no, you can't smell smoke. I can't smell smoke now. Okay. Would you like to change your answer? No, I can't smell smoke. You're sticking with... Yep.

You're sticking with no. Yep. You can't smell smoke. Okay. Bob. Yep, you're sticking with no, yep, you can't smell smoke, okay Bob We've ran out of time can you come back next time? And we can finish it off then wasn't the smoke on up we've ran out of time. Sorry, I can't take it any further I'm really sorry that's it for this episode of can you smell smoke, but thanks for joining in hopefully we'll you again, we'll see you again next time. Thank you for that Andy, I'll be straight in, is that?

Well, rules are rules. I've got a little song that was sent to me. I think it came, I think it might have come from Infinity Rocket Plastics, you know, the Hacking Organization, yes, because I don't know where it's come from, let me just find it. It's Steve McLaren song. I'm supposed to go on it for Infinity Rocket Plastics.

Okay. It's just singing a song with Casper, so's only sure. I'll try to sing that. Is there any music accompaniment or just... No, I don't... It's just cum as a wav and audio voice only wav so maybe the music's on a separate track. Okay, let's hear it. Casper, you're a special friend and I will love you till the very end. Casper, you're my hero, you are Hoffman to my deniero. Don't you ever leave me, if you did, I would bleed freely, you're my one love, you're my turtle doll. I want love your maternal love. Stephen, I should tell you that I just spewed up in the vestibule. And yesterday in the front room, I dropped a tall don your favorite shoes.

Oh Casper, you're such a character, full of wise cracks and laughter You're a book full of custard You're a fillet steak served with mustard You are my one and only and I am never lonely Stephen, I should tell you there's a dead rat in the swimming pool and if you look behind the TV there's another one partially eaten. Oh that's alright Casper we can have a fun game cleaning them up and then we'll go to the fair and buy a candy floss mountain and that's where the recording where it's from. It just stops, does it?

Oh, fantastic. Lovely stuff. Beautiful. I did the great North Run yesterday. You did? Oh, did you, Andy? I did. I did.

You know, I've been running for a few months and I've been, you know, working up me stamina. I didn't tell anybody about it. I kept it quiet because I didn't want to see I was doing it and then bottle out. But I did it. I'll well done you. Thank you. I got around two hours 40, which isn't a fast time

I already think, but I got around. That's the main thing. But it got a bit way it afterwards because everyone gets a medal finishing the race. Yeah. And there's a really long queue to get your medal afterwards. So I was standing in the queue for about a a really long queue to get your metal afterwards. So I was standing in the queue for about a god-buff an hour. Finally get to the front and the fellow

with the metal says, soon you, oh it's carbon in it. Fucking Jeremy Cobb, I want it under the metal's at the great North Run. Jesus Christ. I mean I was exhausted anyway but this was just, you know, he says, soon you're there laddie in your lycra thinking that your MC hammer or such like I was I was in lycra. I was in lime grain lycra. No if you want to paint that mental picture for yourself there He says a pathetic He says a clock to attend Marlmark if I'd have shot you it would have been an active mercy.

It was charming. I mean, it did be best. It wasn't fast, I got round, or? I said, can I have me medal, please Jeremy. He says, no, not till you've asked me my best run. Go on, ask me. I says, all right, what's your best run Jeremy? Nineteen!

BUSH! Nineteen, what? Well, I don't know. This is what, what's that? This, this, this, miles, what speed? Time? What, what's your main 19? This is 19!

Now move along! This is how I, I don't want me medal! I've done the run! I want, I've been killed for half an hour, I want me medal. He says they're not gone. That's this is a box of them. In front of you there. He says there is a front on the race. This is ridiculous. I mean, I've ran 13 and a half miles. I just want me medal. And he puts his palm out stretched, right in me face. And he says talk to the head because they face ain't listening. I just went on Bob. I just want you never got your medal. I

never got me medal. It's not worth it, do you know what I mean? It's just the medal. I did the race and I've got the achievement in the personal satisfaction. It's just the medal. It doesn't matter. I'd probably get one off e-beer. I shouldn't have to put up with shit like that. It's harassment. Oh well you're taking it really well. I'm just admirable. Yeah well me legs are reacking so you know I've got to open. Yeah. I've been listening to the Martin from Holmes Under the Amishow on the radio you know. Yes. Recorded in anything decent and quite a good episode this week. Oh yeah. You know it's the show where he goes to celebrity homes, takes a look inside famous football

people usually. It was Peter Beadsley this week and they. How wonderful. Yes I thought I would tape it and I'll play it for you and you yeah. Here we go. Okay. Ma ma ma ma ma ma matting. Ooh.

Ma ma ma ma ma matting. Ma ma ma matting. Ma ma ma ma ma ma ma 10 Ooh. Ma ma ma ma ma ma ma 10 Ma ma ma ma ma 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 Hello everybody and welcome you are to my show. Now you find me outside the house of Mr Peter Beardsley, ex-Newcastle in England, footballing,

and straight away I can see that the door knocker is in the form of two lovely boiled eggs, little bit unusual, but do you know what? I like it baby, I like it, I like it baby, let's see if anybody's in. Peter, answer the door will ya, these porches are very, very fuckin' runny and I'm not moving for no one. Er, who else is going up? Er, alright mate, how can I help you? Hello Peter, my name's Martin from Arms Under The Yumber, on the BBC,

and I've come to have a look around your beautiful home. Yeah, sorry mate, I don't know anything about that, and my wife only let's be watched for this, except that it shows you on your own. How is it Peter? It's a block called Martin of the town. He wants some noise around our house like, what does he look like? A bit like a head chug, you know that works on his back legs like.

That's Martin, from home, son the Fuchanama! Let's you be right now, you're Jersey afwit! Do come in Martin, and of course, met yourself at home. Thank you! Now I can immediately smell a deep and overpowering stench of eggs. It's not unpleasant actually, reminds me of that morning. I walk up round the back of the little chef in red in bring him in a pita is that a voice? You'll fall in the way.

Bring him in a pita! Hello Mrs Beasley. I see it's your exact good smell. Hello Mrs Beasley, absolutely your exact good smell. Oh, hello there, yes that's nice Martin. I do like a plate of poachies in the hocha morning. Would you like Peter to fetch you some poachies or would you prefer a fried or even a fork and boiler? No, I'm alright thanks. So this must be the living room. It's very dark.

Dark brown setting. Dark wood sideboard. Broodie posters are various policemen. Some of them hold in eggs. And the curtains are shut tight. Ah yeah, the wife does not like any reflection getting on the TV screen. Mae'n gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r

gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r ffordd o'r bwllwch i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i'r cyfodd i' Well, if that's okay by you, love, I would love to have a good stare and to the kitchen window, just shout if you need anything. Hi, do you come and sit with me on the surf and acting? I'll pop a newspaper on the cushion so your jeans don't get any mooky slack on them. I'll tell you what, I'll go through to the kitchen with Peter and have a nose about. You'll finish your porch eggs. I see you've got eight on the plate which is certainly unusual but do you know what

I like it? Ok Martin, I'll come through and join you in a hukh a minute. Well, what a lovely kitchen Peter, nice few of the recycling bins and the carnifers through the window and it's all very sleek and modern with white cabinets and a super modern laminate floor must be a great place to cook in for your wife. It'll be honestly very rarely comes in here unless you've got a shop on with me either while you're cooking like, oh is that right?

It's that the dumb thing these days. And what do you cook? When you're cooking, things that need to be cooked. Well, I'm a big fan of chicken wraps like, oh William of Orange, tell me about these wraps. Well, I like a pit of pit of pit to be a nice and soft and stretchy and I like a chick and you really love me, you love me, you love me with brown stripes on it you know so it looks like it's outdoor cooked so do you cook the chicken under grill here?

No, I got it from the shops and eat them on the bench opposite the shop to on the law world next to the bus step bar Right right or right or ho ho so what do you cook in here then? Ex mainly porch scramble side on it depends what the life one she loves her legs like that's a Rodeo's will die and I'm not sure that I like it. Does she ever eat anything else? I mean, eggs can bind you up a bit. If you don't care, well, do you know what to mean, Harry? All right, she has an occasional bubble

in the summer, right? I'm fried as butter. Yes, she eats just eggs. She's a very eggy lust. Well, hello again, Martin. Is he born in you? He boss me terribly. No, not at all. He tells me you're a very Egy Lass. I don't think I like that. At all, at all. What, you, but you don't like it in Egy lifestyle. No, I don't think I do. How fucking dare you? Well said your chipmunk in a fucking overcoat. Anyone who

isn't fully on fucking rod with a life of eggs is not welcome in this house. Go on, get out before I fucking home, before I put your fucking home under the hammer. Oh come on, let's not be silly bogus, I've got to sure to do. I'll give you a sure, I'll wrap my hacky fucking bandages around your head and then pull me a daff fucking face until your mind wanders off to paint the plan out, what I'm getting out. Well, that wasn't unusual experience, been threatened by a woman, Ozanegadet. At first I thought it was most unpleasant but you know what at the end of the day I think I quite liked it see you next week when I'll be

visiting Santa Cazala's laughter in Pariam sounds like a lullathon see ya ma ma ma ma ma 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 wonderful stuff you get some pleasure from that M-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m- What is that? I haven't. I mean, that was it. I haven't noticed that. I'm a bit of a skater to the country these days, Andy. Are you mainly into that? They've gone crime watch, daily 10 a.m. now. Is that what you do? So just crime and just our own misery is on at 10 and then 11, 15 warms under the armour.

But do you like homes under the hammer when Tommy Walch from ground force makes an occasional appearance? Oh, God, it's very occasional, isn't it? Yeah, but that's the beauty of it because it brings an air of menace to proceedings. I think what he's on. Yeah, I do know what you mean. Yeah, he feels like he could just like smash down a dividing wall or something just for a reason. No, he does that. He does that a bit of jeopardy, don't he? What will Tommy do? Yeah, because he's on the a bit and bit on the edge

Can I just them can I just say oh far I can spit Bob. Yeah, go on then Not bad what was that about 25? 25 24 I think really good. Yeah, thanks. No, well done. I think working on it I think it's really good. Yeah, thanks. No, well done. I think working on it. I think it's really good. Yeah, thanks.

No, well done. I think working on it. Just before we go, I'm thinking of an animal's backside. Can you guess what it is? It's the squirrel, but the red squirrel, the northern red squirrel. Really, really poor effort there. I'm sorry. I can give you a clue if you want to have another go.

Go on then. Yeah. It's got feathers right but it doesn't fly Chicken duck It's a duck yeah, but you said chicken first. Sorry, my ducks don't fly this fucker doesn't Right that's it for a bus. Thanks for indulging us. Thank you back. Bye bye, see you next time. It's fall and you can get anything you need with Uber Eats. Well, almost, almost anything. So no, you can't get a maple tree on Uber Eats, but maple syrup and maple lattes? Yes, we can deliver that. Uber Eats.

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