Athletico Mince - Ep. 75 - Living With A Bananarama
Episode Date: February 1, 2019Mark visits Peter, Roy sends in a stick, Adrian goes to a meat festival, and there's visits from Barry and the Guru... Become a member at https://plus.acast.com/s/athleticomince. Hosted on Acast. Se...e acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Honk honk.
See, did you do that Andy?
That sounds like a little popping horn.
Yeah, well I was meant to bring me popping horn.
It's the horn that I have at the bottom of my stairs and when the kids tease ready,
I'll launch or whatever. I go, ha ha ha ha, do you know they know they've got to come downstairs
and I thought you'd have a gong, were you being a millionaire?
No, it's much quicker, much more insistent there.
So I thought I'd have it and it would be more like a crusevans kind of vibe then, you
know it would be more wacky, my cap.
I'm lucky radio, ha ha ha, but I'm brought it so.
So you're just going to do, huh?
Okay.
If I remember, I'll go, huh, what's going to trigger it?
What do you think about any higher to send the proceedings?
I'll fill with, huh, huh.
Now I was at Vic's sixth-youth birth there.
This down the center of the social media.
Oh, that affair.
Was it?
Yeah.
Adedance. Yeah. Adedance. Oh, you saw me dancing to do. That's. Was it? Oh yeah. Add a dance.
Yeah.
Oh, you saw me dance?
That's a free one, yeah.
Dancing the free catch your train.
I've still got it, Andy.
What?
The ability to dance.
Well, that's not really much of a bossed.
I want really going for it.
You know, it's called Fellas Dance and in it,
we're having a nice time.
Yeah.
Add a couple of sausage rolls as well.
It's a good old fashioned dough,
you know, like in a village hall.
How, how, how was the spread?
Was it quite big?
It was, it was two, it was tiny portions
of fish and chips in like a little coal.
Oh, nice.
You know, almost like a fish nugget.
Fish bite, yeah.
Yeah, with it, I've said three chips in each little coal.
Right. There's a ball of, ball of, ball of,
well, you have as many as you,
you weren't only one visit.
I was a couple hundred, was there?
Could have well have been couple hundred.
And then sausage, big plate, sausage rolls.
Nice big ball of mushy peas.
Good, that it?
Yeah.
And now I've probably had six pints of IPA.
Did you have to tell bad is it for a big knife?
So I've got the toilet a lot.
Next day, yeah.
Next day. Yeah, John Hunt freeze was there. I'll just just do it. John Hunt night? So I've got the toilet a lot. Next day, yeah. Next day.
Yeah, John Hunt Freeze was there.
I'll just just do it.
John Hunt Freeze was there.
Yeah, Stephen Mulherne.
You know, all the celebs came.
When there's free food, they off-create.
You're basically just got like one of their massive
grabber claws picked up the showbiz center
and took it down there wherever this is.
Down the deal, yeah.
Where the deal was it?
Yeah, dealing with Kent.
John and him, Andrew, because you all can't have one. Who would then say, comical spoke like With Dale, was it? Yeah, Dealing Kent. Do you want a name, Andrew?
Because you all can't have one.
Oh, there's a comical spoke like that, wasn't it?
No, it's a bit direct name, oh, and a bit Emo Philips.
Yeah, but would you like a name?
What's the choice?
Alton Powers, yeah.
60s British spy type character,
but only accepts missions in theme parks.
Alton Powers. Yeah. Thank you. On the New Yorker.
Randy Muknab, yeah? XAS, SAS, but now in private security, but only
accepts missions in sex results. That's Randy Muknab. Thank you.
Mason Born, right?
Oh dear God.
90s American secret agent,
but only accepts missions involving restoration
of stonework on recent European churches
because he's Mason.
I'm just gonna be a Ronnie Hot Dog,
so that's all right, will you?
Tell us up to you, I made enough.
Did you make much of a effort?
I only made quite enough of it there.
I've got three for you.
Got it.
So Michael Heiden's sake.
No, I like it instantly.
There's no bio, it's just a name.
Sweet sweet Eleanor.
Yeah.
No, not sure.
Oh, bad, look on your first there
under you, New England Eleanor in the past, didn't you?
I didn't, you know.
Yeah, you did.
I didn't, I hoped to know one.
I hope there's a smoke one out. Oh, what, your bothered one. know, I didn't, you know. Yeah, you did. I didn't, I hoped to know one. I hope there's a smoke one out.
Oh, what, your bothered one?
Yeah.
What you start?
No, I want one.
You want the Nell and the.
I want the Nell and the.
That you think that could be a capture.
I'm thinking this Mary, I want Nell and the,
I want the Nell and the,
I want the next to this chasing shit.
So, um, all right.
Yeah.
You could be the UK Federation for Probe Tube eradication.
Oh, fuck the Probe Tube, Shite. And the Algoth, I like the first fellow though, what was he called?
Sir Michael Heidensick.
Sir Michael Heidensick.
So Andrew, have you got one of your deaf quizzes?
I've got one of my quizzes, one of my one-off, right?
Now I would have had my horn, right?
So because this one Andrew is called hardwood
Oink Boeing
Laminate
Oink
Carpet
Boeing carb oink tile right do you want to hear that again? You're right yeah
I would
Hardwood oink Boeing Laminate
Oink Carpet
Boeing Oink tile right Hardwood, oink, boring, laminate, up, oink, carpet, up, boring, up, oink, tile, right?
That's the title of this episode.
That's the title of the episode.
It's the title of the quiz.
Right, we're talking about a 200 square foot room, right?
10, 10 or whatever, yeah.
200 square foot average quality of each product, right?
And fully installed, right?
And we're choosing between tile, hardwood, laminate, carpet,
including liver, and fully installed that median point for each product.
Average price tile, average hardwood, average laminate, average carpet.
I want you to grade them from least to most expensive carpet,
laminate, hardwood tile.
While you're thinking laminate's cheapest.
Okay.
Fucking carpet, second cheapest.
Okay.
Then I'm gonna go hardwood with tile, most expensive.
Not a bad effort, I mean. then I'm gonna go hardwood tile most expensive.
Not a bad effort at all. Ah!
Do you know, just like last week,
just one little disc, in discretion.
Tile is the most expensive.
1,100 pound fully installed, yeah.
Right.
Next is hardwood, very close.
1,062 pounds right fully
installed but sadly next to the slammer net at 5 6 8 carpet at 4 9 9 that's you
disappointed I am disappointed you know what that is that's these these bastards
that run these carpet places that'll do you haul out for 500 quid,
bringing the numbers down for everyone else.
What are you going to say, like, for a...
Is that what you're meant?
Sounds like it's me.
No.
But cheap, cheap, cheap, shitty carpets that like, you know, landlords are putting in.
No, because I'm taking, honestly, there's laminates available now.
What was the differential between the bot 2 again.
499 for carpet.
And 5, 6, 8 for laminate.
There you go.
So Andrew, you have just played hard wood, oink, boing, laminate, oink, carpet, boing, oink,
tile.
Well done.
You didn't do too badly at all.
Thanks Bob
What's behind the door? Yes, oh no, yes, oh no, you thought it'd come but it's back what's behind the door? I don't know
I don't know
Three things behind the door, but yeah, imaginary Not the store here, that's the imaginary one.
Would you go in and look at these things behind the door. First one, human pyramid, but everyone in the human pyramid is wearing a mask of Jimmy Carregus' face.
No.
Jimmy Carregus.
I'm terrible at Scouse.
Jimmy Carregus. I'm terrible at scouts. Cheyenne! D-mi-khan! Cheyenne! This chicken!
This chicken dip is sort of that a no.
Right.
A massive hovering tennis ball.
Mmm.
And there's no way of working out how it's hovering.
Right.
Would you go in and look at that?
No.
It goes bit, bit, bit.
Oh, so thanks for telling us, it's you.
So you left that behind. I just thought I'd add it in as an added incentive in case
He said no first. Well, I know I don't want to see it. No, you're too late with bit bit bit
Like a bill
He's shit first and he's putting up a floating shelf on the wall using his hat as a spirit level. It's like
fucking at an angle. Let's see. Yeah, it's be kind. You just say it's an angle. No, no, no, no, no, no
I'll see a little and I'm not just being contrary because you don't like the feature. I don't like the feature at all
It's kind of big back next week. Yeah, I bet
All right
I'm still mainly sat at home, you know, in a kind of state of flux, like, you know, not knowing if I'm part of New York, that's where you're not here, or not like, you know.
I'm falling in club up, it is now and then late, but the tenter put me on all then, and I get transferred to ticket office or
catering department, you know. I think the most very glitch like you know in the system I am a'r yw'n gweithio. Mae'r yw'n gweithio. Mae'r yw'n gweithio.
Mae'r yw'n gweithio.
Mae'r yw'n gweithio.
Mae'r yw'n gweithio.
Mae'r yw'n gweithio.
Mae'r yw'n gweithio.
Mae'r yw'n gweithio.
Mae'r yw'n gweithio.
Mae'r yw'n gweithio.
Mae'r yw'n gweithio. Mae'r yot i'n mynd i'r cyllor. Aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, aegs, a and rabbit husbandry. So, she had come around and showed me some pictures of his rabbits
from unusual angles, you know, they get the interesting light and he would check the
insulation in me laughing. I thought that sounded excellent. No, you had none Sunday, right? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no showed average speed of 57 miles per hour, fuel consumption of 43 MPG, pretty good for
a 2.0L petrol. Oh, how interesting. Did you have a little less
brake on the journey? Or did you just plow straight so?
And a brief stop outside Carlisle, I'll play to Barbera prepared me a flasky Campbell celery soup, a couple of bread buns in a brown
paper bag.
I like the sound of that bag back.
Yeah, a nice bag indeed.
A lot of it was in and out of it, very sharpish.
It's all like the feeling of brown paper, it gives me the shivers.
Well, yeah, that is a cause.
I know a brown paper bag mate.
Was it that you know a soft peat,
or a nice and like crinkly,
wrinkly, rustly,
little, rustily sort of peat, eh?
It's on me, passage of seat,
if you'd like to come and take a look, Peat, eh?
I've got the interested doubt.
It was definitely crinkly in appearance.
I don't remember any rusts,
so when I removed the bread buns.
Oh, well, come on in,
let's go and take a look I must say
to already a memorable day. So I'm popping puffer puffer jacket on I went to the
curbside next to Maxka and we stay to the window at thep a bag on the plate you see in your... Well, it's definitely, uh, wrinkly and crinkly, Mark.
Would you agree? Oh, without a doubt, yes. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I'm a bit worried about reducing the ambient temperature in the vehicle if I open the door to be honest.
I do not know what you mean, I'll tell you what, you walk in the door and now grab it,
they quicken and you shut the door, really quick in the door, you know, I get busted.
So my door opens the door and I quickly grab the paper bag and started to push it in my hands.
Yeah, can you hear it, Mark? I figured it was making a rustle.
It's hard to tell, to be honest, Peter. That puffer puffer jacket is making a rustle-y sound
just as you manipulate the bag. Maybe that's the rustle we're hearing.
Oh, do you? So, well, I don't know, give it a go, pay earmark.
I can't pay to, I hit the touch of them like I previously said.
So, I'll take off the puffer puffer jacket, you know, and I'll hand it to Mark,
who puts it on and which I thought was a bit cheap, you know, you know, I didn't say no.
I'll give it back a good old c crush between our fingers and show enough we can hear a lovely
crisp, wutty little russet.
Oh fantastic lovely old fashioned sound that isn't it?
Really nice.
At this point the wife's done the yard on the same road. Shut the fuck up with that poxie fucking paper bag you little shit of a man!
And you, she shoved the bag out with me hands on her jacket.
Oh, hello Mark. How do you know for little C.U.? Why don't you go inside? Peter's just about to go some special Sunday eggs.
Wow, I love your tight-shaped mac. What's it made of zinc?
No, they disappear with me. I was together, how you gonna run out?
I'll pick up the bag and give it a cheeky, little, wrinkly, crinkly, or so, you know.
Well, I'm not sure like it is, Mark's wife, Bavu might want the paper back like so.
I fully know when I put it on the back seat, ju-thinkies.
So, a bit later, I thought, I eat a volcano formation and that sits on three
five eggs and up two porches down your front line of the volcano and then gonna top the letter if you do not make it.
Hey Peter, you think you're getting back on the pitch? No, I'm not Mac.
Ah, it's just that with that haircut,
I thought you'd be trying to get into the Aldani and football squad.
Ha, fuck on, ha, Mac!
That is a good old, fuck and kicking, that clown is bollocks.
I give him them piece of fuck and shit, I'r gydol yn ffordd yn cydyn yn cylwbodol. Mae'r gydyn yn pysio ffordd yn sydd y cydyn yn ffordd yn sydd y cydyn yn ffordd yn sydd ysgwyd.
Mae'r gydyn yn ffordd yn cydyn yn ffordd yn cydyn yn ffordd.
Mae'r gydyn yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd. Mae'r gydyn yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordddodd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn ffordd yn fford Nw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n yw'n from these ain't Mac And a buff burst out laughing again so
I know, no what's been going on between Mac and me
Why I shunned you, you know
Hey, I brought my favourite rabbit down with me
Ungene
I'll go fetch him from the car
He got a lalk's head and suddenly
We're even screaming and
Wearing in the world
But it also got cars on his road his rabbit flat a pancake like you know from being one
other.
And Gaina and Gaina my beautiful and Gaina how did you get out?
I'm sure the back door was shut you should have been safe when the blanket how could this
have happened? Well
Oh my bother, I think you and I probably both knew that something like that. I forgot to close the
Gado and I put the paper bag in there, but I kept me mouth shut like I've got to get back to Barbara
Why did I come here to see you? I'll never forgive myself
And then the wife looks at me and says...
I bet my last four-gun pound that some would take you with you, you creepy shit.
And then some de-eggs would have fucking embalescent.
The porches were barely bloody at all, let alone very fucking bloody.
And the omelet was as tough as a carpet fit, fucking leapads. Now fuck off out of my
sight. Oh, what a last thing Max got off in your puffer puffer jacket so he had better creep off
somewhere warm. You total fucking funny. So yeah, she goes back in Yausen.
I immediately noticed that the brown paper bag is on the road near ungainery mans like
Thor must have come up with ungainery.
So if I am bobbing the land wetlay in a nation farm, I'm on good old stair, the washing a'r marnau, gyd oes dew i'r washingo i'r o'r o'r o'r o'r o'r o'r o'r o'r o'r o'r a'r marnau ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n ni'n Shit my room the puffer puffer Matt Loretton's got it
Don't
One Peter be a Lee the only one Peter be
Whoa Peter there. Oh God Peter Peter Peter Peter? Whoa, Peter there.
Oh, God, Peter, Peter, Peter, Peter, Peter.
I was not, I think, I'd tell you what was encouraging.
Is why I know she won't be very nice to him,
but she'd talk until we meet, she saw.
What's kind of talking?
Yeah, well, he's gonna be okay.
Spousal of abuse. I've been watching the Tally much, Andrew.
Er, this and that.
This and that.
Me daughter keeps telling us I need to watch the good place on Netflix.
Have you seen that?
No.
I think it's on, like, it's fourth series now.
Is it like American family?
It's American, it's kind of sitting the afterlife.
Oh, fuck that.
Shite.
I mean, bless her. I love it a bit.
But it's been on it. It's been on it. It's been on it for two months and it's fucking awful.
Have you ever said Bundy? I'm on episode one of Ted Bundy. You like it. It's a little bit
Ted Bundy for beginners, I think. It is a bit yeah. If you're not for dummies. Yeah, if you
know the story, there's not much new. There's not. Did you say abducted in play and sight?
Oh yeah, I did, Andy.
How did you manage?
I had to put it off for half an hour.
It's exactly half an hour.
But I did go back, Andy.
Did you, is it worth stealing yourself?
Because, you know, you've seen how spectacularly bizarre the story is.
And I know the point you turned off too much.
Yeah.
But it gets worse.
No, sorry, it doesn't get worse, it gets more bizarre.
Right.
Should I steal myself a minute?
I think it should be because that awful half hour, that little bit on the half hour,
that's it, there's nothing else.
There's nothing in the bottom of that.
No, I know the bit you mean, but it's an extraordinary tale in it about manipulation.
It's quite hard to
imagine how people can be so fucking global, stupid, extraordinary.
It's the 70s, right? Well, I also think that you can almost smell the religion in the
story, can't you? The deeply religious, emeritus sort. Yeah, I've watched a good one on all four under the Walter presents called
Jewel on Veil, right? But corrupt French mayor, so that's got to be alright, and I enjoyed that.
Does he wear a sort of tricon hat?
No, but he's got a decent tash on him.
I see.
Very geometric one, I think people will enjoy.
I liked homecoming, you know the Julia, Julie Roberts, are Julia Roberts, I don't know. I think people enjoy. I liked homecoming. You know the Julia Julia Roberts. Julia Roberts. I don't know
I don't know. The word of it. That's it's no it's a 10-part on Amazon. Mm-hmm. It looks beautiful. Good story. Julia Roberts, she's beautiful. She's beautiful and she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. Oh, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I I want to set up a Julia Roberts. You're our knowledge, beautiful.
What's your own columns?
Your college is beautiful in the 80s.
It's just beautiful in the 80s.
I dynasty.
90s, banana rammerals, that 80s, beautiful.
The 80s, banana rammer,
because they started, stopped wearing like,
denim's, that started tartness,
that was a little bit nice, dresses, the nut.
Could you imagine living with a banana rammer, like?
Not all of them, no.
Maybe it's just got a little bit of a...
I did sit at a banana rammer'm a what you mean? You know
This three banana rams in it is yeah, but what about what about was the far of them?
No, the three of them three of them won't left them to the one coming so it's been four. Yeah, I brought the just
No, but you just want to live without
Banana Rama up in our armor. Yeah
Just one of them like current would, would you keep them, would you keep them, the basement
like, oh, I'd be nice to them.
All right, and that, and I've eaten them, gotten that, let me add that once a day.
Just one of them though, one at a time, because then start to collaborate if you let them
all out in the yard together.
Oh, start going, crash back and all up.
I'm planning on that.
I crash back and all up.
I'm going to be over the world.
Fuck us.
F**k, but now I'm a rapper.
More trouble in the world.
I'm, I tell you what, I you what I'm fucking happy with Mary oh shit Roy's not I did you say no he's not here he's
posted me a USB stick shit so I'll plug it into me laptop and we'll play it and we'll see what's
on there that's nice of a minute because I'm because you see it's nice but he obviously couldn't be asked
to come in. Here we go.
What are we doing?
What are we doing?
I'm a military leader.
The war is my day.
I'm going to destroy you wherever it is my game.
I'm a time in energy.
It's about like this because the of a balance is getting on me tips
It's not going to be a game, it's just a board game
It's actually a simulation of a military campaign
Football's finished its fair to say
Table top B strategy is the only way
Whooo whew whew whew whew whew whew whew whew whew
I've got an infinite O'an, it's fully equipped.
The endless tanzas getting shot at this shit.
I took my swine on loan, it's such a half whip.
He only plays warhammer on his living room carpet.
Take off from his guy's running, the lizard man cap,
whilst scatting plays going,
annoying like the twat.
Primially he can swivel, he'll only go,
is the tear-bone techie, and you will wherever I hold.
Warhammer. Warhammer. You will never I will. Whoever. Whoever.
Whoever.
Whoever.
Ain't that one bad, what's that?
So he's getting into like a sport.
Is it like, can I reckon he thinks of it like as a battle match?
Yeah, a military match, kind of.
Woo, woo, woo, woo.
He pretty dresses like an American general, or he's playing or something like that. Yeah, I bet he does march, kind of sandwich. Woo, woo, woo, man. He pretty dresses like an American general
and he's playing us a lot like that.
Yeah, I bet he does it in his on days.
He will, yeah.
In his on days with the cutler plums
and the car on top down there.
Yeah, purple.
Now, yellow.
Yellow, yeah.
Yeah.
So, Andrew, early this week,
I wore up on the Alexander Palace again.
Oh, I... Do you know what I was actually doing? Do you know me rare gone?
Oh, yeah.
You mean you're rare gone? I got a job for brought that either.
I forgot that, I was on there.
Ah!
Was that...
The, um... It won't kill anyone, everyone seems to be immune to it, so I was getting...
I wasn't going to get it serviced.
Right.
And I happened to pass a lot of the restaurant.
I saw where I saw the agent before, and I lost a
bunting and signage up, advertising that today was a meat festival day.
Yeah, it's what the meat festival everywhere.
So it didn't take a genius to guess the agents that was would be inside.
Yeah. So I popped in.
It's about eight, only about what, 11 o'clock in the morning, but you're enough.
There he was.
There's only enough for me to sat on his own at a table, talking to the waiter again, 8 o'clock in the morning but you're enough. There he was. There he was.
Sat on his own at a table, talking to the waiter again,
going through the menu I suspected.
So I slipped into the next move and had a good old listen.
Okay.
So I heard you and starts off.
So what's this meat festival about, lad?
At an all-de-event, we'll serve nothing but meat and meat-pious produce.
Ah, fuckin' dear long!
Oh, you God, yes, last then.
So you mean what you're saying is, no veg whatsoever to ruin the party.
You've hit the nil right on its foot and head there.
Are you beautiful, hard-line, meaty, genius?
I could happily grab you in me arms and give you a full-on, sweaty kiss.
You'll hear a single finger on me, sir, and I'll f**k and rip your lungs out your bag of f**k.
Fair f**king-
Fair f**king no Northwood. Hold on.
What about chips?
Oh chips, are not a vegetable, sir.
They are 52% beef dripping.
52% beef drinking, or power me up you, fucker.
What about vinegar, is that allowed?
We have a new or fucking idea of what vinegar is.
So we'll leave the customer's discretion.
I'll pass, thanks it's got the whiff of a fruit, our are berry about it.
Buries of fuck pellets, so it'd be better off in the sneaks shit.
Here, fucking here, so run me through the starters, you slag fuck.
Here we go, boiled neck, end of lamb, with deep-fried henskiddies, and a pig's blood-fuck
and cool-as.
Oh, do, fuck off, will ya.
Oh, you fuck off.
What a fucking combo.
That's got me popping tods.
You could dine on that and power a tractor with the aftertod.
Yes, it's a very large bunch of foxer.
We also have grilled poor marrow with crispy pork sprinkles served on a bed of
get this pork, fork and belly.
Oh, fork, fork, fork.
Have I imagined the angel steers?
But now I am to test them.
I'll take them, fork and bone, marrow.
Now give me the man's
your fucker.
Hold on fucking tight, cause this is gonna send you, I'll await a planet fuck.
It's a four beast roast.
Oh fucker.
Oh you fucker.
Listen, it's a mole stuffed in our rabbit, it's stuffed in our pig's head, it's a moll stuffed in our rabbit, It's stuffed into a pig's head,
It's been rammed right inside a fucking seal.
Oh, while it you dirty bastard, I'll take it.
It's slow, fuck, I'm roasted in my...
Fuck bang that's a bowl for the nigh-dart finish.
You beautiful, beautiful vendor of the fat.
Thank you, would you like a fucking drink?
Could you siphon off some of the sea-pitch from the pork belly?
Fork yes, will I be all you fork and once, sir?
Oh, do you have any shin or jar-born for me, sent, Bernard?
No, so fork and sorry about that.
Fork, I do have a bar and so a joint from Afro-Dongi, if that's any good.
Fogging perfect. Now get a fart on, I've got the pre-meat sweats and me knickers are taking
the brunt. Fogging will. Oh, and I've went the
way. Yeah. And I've got to be honest, the stenching
that place and the eye at the nodder, I stenching that place and the adding order I ran out with somebody
who went on the track.
Too much for you.
It's on it too much for me, yeah.
You got your limits in the North.
Well, I've got our limits when it comes to me and the...
Oh, that's right.
I got the wrong.
The girl is near you.
Open your heart to me.
Baby, I hold the lock and you hold the key.
Oh man, just fucking calm down, eh?
A lot of people have turned over new leaf in January and made some changes in their life.
Have you made any changes, Robert?
Yeah, I'm trying to eat less chocolate and cheese, go, bro.
Hmm, maybe you could think more about your appearance.
Some of the negative energy you receive from those closest to you
is probably because of the way you present yourself.
Right, interesting.
I think that you want to be treated as an adult
but you dress like someone who spends his days looking on the internet at the army soldiers.
but you dress like someone who spends his days looking on the internet at army soldiers.
Right, I might, yeah, hear what you say go, Ro. There's also very good wigs on the market these days, Ro,
but if you don't mind, forking out a little bit, no fence.
Oh, well, yeah, I could consider that a small thing.
Oh, good, good, fucking wood.
And his developments with your water works.
Really, are you still experiencing unwanted night jets?
Yes, night jetting is a curse.
Yes, a curse.
Perhaps sleeping in a plastic boiler suit
with some kind of built urine expression of funnel
might be a good idea, possibly?
I know, a man who does them are going to be mat rates and that.
Oh, I'll get, well, I'll get in touch.
Go, real, yeah.
I'm interested, yeah.
I'm really relieved, thank you. And an internet code in touch. Go roll, yeah, I'm interested. Thank you.
And an internet code.
Okay.
That's it from me.
It's Joe Swash with me today, you go, Ro.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Go, Ro!
Oh, there he is.
So I can see just the very edge of his ass.
Yeah.
Go, Ro, Ro.
Well, thank you, go, Ro.
Thank you, the go, Ro. He's retreat, thank you, Goal. Thank you.
The Goal is retreating through him, you know.
You're great.
And there we go.
What's that?
There he goes, he's just a vapor.
He's just a piece of gas, doesn't he?
He's told me I'm going to take him.
What, he says I've got, he says I've got a dress
a bit better.
But, my, I don't, maybe consider a wig.
And he's talking about some special suit
I could get to for night jetting.
Yeah, I'm involved in that. I don't want to see anymore.
Hi, y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y- style. So I wanted to get myself well ahead of the winter weather curve so I had some workman round to the Gafferoonie this week to install a wood burner in my walkthrough lounge
kitchen diner. It has a heat output efficiency rating over 90%. That's getting pretty close
to the percentage of deals I close within the first 80 hours, first 48 hours of a negotiation initiation.
I burn a mixture of beach, chest and oak and ash wood.
If I was a wood, I would be a Japanese cherry, looks beautiful, smells heavenly and is
as tough as a senior negotiator from Purple Bricks.
That's a bit of a business joke.
Had the Audi Voleted by the Polish gang at the Garden Centre Car Park, yeah, just one look
at me and the new I wanted the executive hand wash with gold level buff and polish. I
sat in the car sipping on a locally sourced camper, chew chew, as the forens crawled around
its body
walk, bodywork. I couldn't help but think about the incredible success I've made
of my UK life and what an inspirational aspiration example I was setting to
these migratos. But your laugh at that may not with me.
In some ways, I am a migrant, you know, because as you probably remember, my soul is in India,
but my physical self is UK-based.
Got my new platinum debit card through from the bank this week, 5K instant credit if required.
I doubt it. An access to some incredible benefits, free
compituchu on production of the card of Petisserie Valerie. Non-priority access
to the BT lounge at Gatwick, 10% of Hatsun and Brellis. 10% of Hatsun and Brellis
at Fenix, it's an incredible tool. Anyway, my lunch break at the Momo,
having a protein smoothie and a chickpea
and hairy mint leaf on sour bread.
I won't let you down.
I'll just take you up, up, up, up,
up into the business sky,
making love to a golden eagle.
Ciao and have a beller on the house.
Barry there.
Barry one more and I still wouldn't go for a pint with him.
You wouldn't?
No. No. It would be intolerable.
Well, you're probably right.
Do you reckon any Linux is still walking?
That's probably.
Is she what? Still walking on Brock Glass. I doubt it because I mean it's very
92 in the souls of a fate must be on fucking ribbons by now you'd think wouldn't
you mind you there's people that can do that kind of thing they can walk along
Brock Glass and Hot Cores and that sort of thing. I think one of them might explain why she's
only put out one of her original songs the last 15 years you can't do both yeah you can't walk and broaden glass and write songs yeah and
that's why which is a I am on desert island discs I saw that I thought that was
some kind of um your internet wind up yes I am on the website on Sunday okay
that's something and it shows like the Lord of fucking Harry 70s rock are you
worrying that if I if I know now could have put Roy's song in, could not.
He could have.
He could have.
I've got to get off now, Andrew.
Yeah, I've got enough as well.
I've got a meeting about a movie.
Of you?
Yeah.
All right.
It's not that important.
I just wanted to mention one other thing.
What's that?
Have you seen the movie Beverly Lynn Loff?
No.
Oh, Loff Lynn.
No. It's a good item, must see.
On the Netflix, is it?
On the Netflix.
All right.
I mean, warning, it's fucking nuts, right?
But your laugh, and you might even cry,
we'll beautifully put together movies.
Good.
So check it out.
It's called Beverly Lynn Loff.
Like a fancy oven of Beverly Naxx, after a Vodan Alina.
Yeah, fancy of Beverly.
Yeah, I might go.
Beverly's a bubbly and saucy though aren't they?
Are you sure?
Bubble perm.
Yeah, I could get in your nose.
Alright, that's enough there.
See you around sometime.
Ha ha ha ha ha!
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Alcohol and other everyday essentials. Order Uber Eats now.
For alcohol you must be legal drinking age. Please enjoy responsibly.
Product availability varies by region. See out for details.