Aunty Donna Podcast - Podcast Ep 237 - The Best Of The Aunty Donna Club Part 1 - Funny Mums and Dads 2
Episode Date: January 12, 2021For the next few weeks we're putting up our favourite episodes from auntydonnaclub.com! auntydonna.com/shows haventyoudonewell.com  Join The Aunty Donna Club: https://www.patreon.com/auntydonnaSee o...mnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Hello and welcome to the Antidona podcast.
Summer edition.
These are...
Are you laughing for real?
Summer edition.
Where does he come up with it?
I was a fake laugh. I couldn't tell.
This is the three best Patreon podcasts from last year for us from the
Antidona Club. If you don't, you can remember go to
antidonodonodon.com.4-
Why the fuck am I talking about?
Patreon.com.4-
Antidona. This is a podcast we did last year called Funny Mons and Dads.
Funny Mons and Dads.
Part 2 that we did for the Patreon. We hope you enjoy it and we'll be back with another
best of next week and we'll wake up soon.
Enjoy it.
You listen to the funny doughnut podcast. The greatest fucking podcast in the world.
Bro, I'm make it tacky sometimes
And yes, we hope you enjoy them
The fucking podcast
Boys
Thank you so much for coming to my birthday
Oh, why is that?
It's a pleasure mate
I wouldn't have missed you 50
The only 50, I thought I was coming to a 60
Oh, get out of my way
Get out of my way
You're quite... You've always been the funny one of the group.
That kind of stuff right there kills me, slays me.
It's why I keep it.
No, I'm like, yeah.
I'm sorry, I just got it.
I just got it.
I knew it was, I had got it. I just got it. I knew it was I had the you know
I had the rhythms of a joke, but I didn't click to yet. Well, I thought what I genuinely thought
America thought you were actually yeah, I thought you might have been 45 because you stay so fit and I know you
played sport. I know you do still play recreational sports, winning stand. And I'll just stand by the way. The real football.
Not this way.
Yeah, what do we call it?
Soccer.
Yeah, right here's a football.
Sorry, but go on.
Get stuffed.
Get out of here, mate.
I am really excited to celebrate your birthday.
Thanks, mate.
We got the pizza oven ready to go.
I've put the dance floor out under the patio,
help the back. Oh great. Who's this? Who's this? It's just come. Oh hello there, how are you?
Sorry, I can't remember the name of my husband from the last podcast, but he does
send these apologies. He's working off short. Very good. months. So, very good.
Oh, that's very funny.
They get paid well.
They get paid very well.
You know, we're paying, we're gonna pay off the third house
by the end of the year.
So, and that's the thing, he'll do the offshore for six months
and then he'll be back.
We'll pay off the third house
and we've only got seven houses left to pay off.
Did you end up building on the block in Turkey?
You built, you know. We haven end up building on the block in Torque? You built your...
No, no.
We haven't built on the Torque block just yet,
but we did just convert, you know,
the house in the center of town, near the rail station.
Yes, yes, yes.
We did just convert that quarter acre
into 53 town houses.
That's amazing.
That's a little bit of a tight square.
I think it's gonna work.
I've got 1,200 blocks at the moment on the go.
I've got 600 of which out and along on the beach.
I've got one in Turkey, one in Driesdale.
I've got 78,000 in Ballarat.
I have blocked up, no more blocks.
I've told the Mrs. I've said we can't be getting any more be getting any more blocks. Oh because yeah it's the same in me on the
weekend Saturday morning the Sunday I'm just mowing lawns on the other
vacant lots. It's exhausting it's so much up here I'll tell you what though we
took a drive out a drive out the other day to see one of the blocks that we've
got up the one up in Turkey. They just put a tap in.
So we just went up just to see,
and Mrs. was like, let's go up,
let's go for a drive and see the block.
I think they just got the tap in.
Just one of those little taps out the front.
Every time they make any slight development on the block,
we make sure that we drive out here.
We make sure that we drive out,
and we have a look at it.
You got it, you got it. It's important that we drive out and we have a look at it. But you've got it.
It's important that we see every single step of the block being developed.
Well, we've got a place going up in Hawthorne and we've got a place in Palm Building and
if I'm going to Coles, get some milk or dry past, go to Hawthorne and dry past.
Yeah, that's east of the city, isn't it?
That's east of the city, isn't it?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
very. Yeah, lovely spot there. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, very multicolored. But anyway,
well my boy, my oldest boy, he just moved to Fitzroy. I don't know about that. I said,
surely he could have moved in Southville, the area. Fitzroy in the inner north. I don't know,
but very different. Now, you used to be working class. It used to be working class.
So is it quite nice now, is it?
I've got a friend I'm gonna make from work
who's parents owned a place in Fitzroy,
a grand parents,
or parents owned a place in Fitzroy.
Yeah, right.
And they sold it, moved out the air-ping,
and they're kicking themselves now.
So you would be, you know, $40 million, you know?
Yeah, really now, yeah.
You know, they would have bought it for $12,000.
Yeah, yeah, in the 30s.
Yeah.
Now it's worth $48 billion.
Well, I think I bought that place.
I bought that place two years ago.
You did?
You did?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, right, okay.
Yeah, I just, you know, I just put
all everything against it.
Yeah.
Well, look, come in.
Well, happy birthday.
Happy birthday. Thank you, come in. I don't know if you want it. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I'll come in. Happy birthday. Happy birthday. Thank you
I don't know if you want it. I brought a a a try of footy francs
So these are hot dogs with skin on them. Beautiful. They've been boiled. Yeah, I boiled them up some you can see of pierced
So they've sorted it on the skin on the skins. I can see the piercing on the skin and
Tomato sauce. So I can put that out for you. Whatever you're up to. Put it out next to the cabana.
So, Lisa, Lisa's brought, got a, got some, uh,
got a pasta base she did.
Oh, how you, oh, hello, Lisa.
Thank you for the pasta base.
Oh, great.
Put the pasta base.
Yeah, pasta and pasta bacon, I've done scallops.
Oh, you got scallop potatoes?
Yeah, scallop potatoes.
Put it out.
Cheese sauce. We've got, uh, we've done the catering, we've got
cabbana, we've got twiggy sticks. Did you just get this from
Coles? Did you just get the... They do it up for you mate.
They do it up on a platter. Yeah, you go to Coles.
You go to Coles, you go to do it up for you. They do it up for you.
Yeah, they do it up for you. Yeah, they do it all and
it's got the plastic tray with the little pockets in it.
They just fill it up. My question you, go and name your pick-up matter olives.
Sorry, what were you saying?
You're gonna go, you go, you go get the olives yourself,
you go get the gaminning yourself right,
and you get the biscuits.
No, no, mate, no, no, no, no, they do it up for you.
Right, so you go.
What do you mean?
What do you mean?
They got a little pamphlet out there out the front.
You go, you pick up the pamphlet,
they got a couple of options there.
You wanna have a look at the party platters option.
That's right. And I'm gonna do it up for you. They look at the party platters option. That's right.
And under the party.
They do the whole thing up for you.
It's unbelievable.
Comes with the lid.
Right, you put the lid on.
Yeah, you put the lid safe.
I was thinking that the first thing I thought
when you said that, I said, I thought,
well all right, well that's good that they do it up for you.
But I'm driving the car.
Yeah, it's gonna go all over the shop.
It's gonna be tipping, it's gonna be spilling.
Not with the lid mate.
They do the lid for you, they do the whole. and I'll tell you what, it's like a pick
and mix. You do worry because coming in the speed
humps, coming down here because the kids on the drag racing. Yeah, there's that many speed
humps. The first time you're over, I was like the cabana's in the back seat. It's going
to go everywhere, not with the lid mate. Yeah, they do it up for you. It's unbelievable
the stuff they do. They do it up for you. Yeah, it's full just full technology like they just got it all worked out
It's a bit like we were at the at work the other day. It was one of the girls birthdays and
One of the other girls obviously was in charge and usually we make something up or we do the lunch for the birthday
Yeah, and she just went to Subway got a whole platter and they sort of cut up the sand
They do it all for you now. Why bother? Why do you bother? It's taste all the hassle out of it Yeah, and she just went to Subway got a whole platter and they sort of cut up the sand
Just for you now why bother why bother? It's taste all that hassle out of it
Well, then when the actually doesn't cost you much more when you actually think about how much all the ingredients cost
Yeah, and the more you buy the more you save with these places. Yeah, so so that's why we've got that's why we've got
56 trays of cabbara out there.
Yeah.
Because the price of 56 trays was the savings, the price of 50.
Now, I only wanted one.
I only wanted one, but the savings.
Yeah.
Well, you can have it tomorrow if you're lunch.
I've got cabbara for the rest of my fucking life.
Listen, before I go in, I've got here, I just wanted to quickly say,
I know we all brought something.
I've made your favorite, I've made you a jelly slice.
No, you didn't make me a jelly slice.
But I just want to say, we don't have to put it out if you don't want.
I can give it straight to you.
I'd be a hibber to...
The guilt would drive me crazy, because I know.
No, the biggest travesty to this world would be keeping your jelly
size from the rest of the people at this point. Just make sure you get yourself a couple of
slices before you put it in. I'll make sure I put a couple in the freezer.
Now come in, come in. I can run down to Costco. I've got a Costco membership, which I've
got an annual Costco membership. Oh, that's great, really. So you see my photos on that
and you know, that's got all my accreditation, so.
Yeah, you buy and everything big?
Well, that's the thing, and so for moments like
exactly this, I can go down to Costco,
private parking, you go upstairs,
and I can get wholesale size, everything.
Incredible.
You get the brands, so.
It's an American company.
Does it have the brand names?
It does have the brands here. You can hand get branding, get off branding, get whatever you're after.
So, for a villain like this, you know, you get a big, the biggest fucking pizza you've ever seen.
Oh, fuck, a big pizza.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And, you know, Slab a Coke, you know, chicken wings, all that kind of stuff.
Pepsi, do they have lunch?
I don't know.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure they've got Pepsi.
Yeah, yeah.
It sounds a little bit weird for me
Personally, I just you know I've got my calls down and the Woolworths and
It's the same it's just big it's big. Oh sounds a bit American, you know, and they you know, I don't know about that
I prefer British comedy
No, we're talking about supermarkets, grocery stores.
Yeah, but I prefer, you know, if you get a, like I don't know about the Americans, everything's so big.
Me and the partner went to New York a few years ago and we went together.
You know, we just landed and it was, the plates were so big.
Just big plates of food.
I think I said this last time I was with you guys, but I went to a pizza place,
we were in America on a holiday.
Oh, we did, yes.
And I said, I went out, I said,
I'll get the pizza, you know, pepperoni pizza,
and I'll get a meatloat, yeah,
and they were just pepperoni on it,
and that's it, nothing else.
It's really good.
Where's the Aussie?
Where's the Hawaiian?
Yeah, yeah.
And they don't do that.
And we're all of the first Korean.
Was the slice just like seven meters long? Yeah, I is it and they don't do that? And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice.
And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice. And we're all in the ice. and you fold it up, you need a small cap for a chose, so that's all I need.
Now come in, come in, I've got the bar set up, you can get a couple cocktails on the menu.
You got Malibu.
Yeah, we got Malibu.
Yeah, we got Malibu.
I got my nephew, he's bartending the event, paying him $20 for the night.
He's eight years old. Come in, come in, he will make you up a cosmopolitan,
Malibu if you want to, Malibu.
You know, it's funny you say that,
it's good to do that because he's having, you know,
he's, what else is he doing?
He's sitting at home, bloody pulling his dick.
Pulling his dick, pulling his dick is what he's doing.
Oh, he's out here, you know,
running a bit of that age now.
He's going to be the cash learning,
twelfth and a people. Yeah, you know, looking's a bit of an age now. He's only been a cash learning, two off-and-a-people.
Yeah, yeah.
You know.
Look at him, he's wearing a little suit.
He's got a little bow tie.
I think they know, but they think you don't know,
do you, my youngest,
he's just started having the two hour showers,
and it's like, I know, what you're doing in there.
And we're in a drought.
I know, we're in a bloody drought.
I know, here we are having his two hour showers.
That's what I say.
I say, oh, we're in a drought.
That's what I say.
Oh, the other day.
Yeah.
The other day I was using the family computer and I found pornography on it.
And I just said to my husband, I said, is it even worth it?
Do we need to sit him down?
And he wanted to do the whole kitten caboodle and I thought thought you know what let's just leave this one. Well if you had
the talk you have an other talk. Well we're Catholic so we never have the talk.
Right. Of course. Just wait until that one of them is pregnant. Yes.
And then say to the other ones. Like, don't do that. Yeah. Yeah. But we don't
believe in the talk. It's too much effort and awkwardness.
We had to talk the other day with my eldest.
It was important, it was good.
It was good to get on the same level.
We were talking about the birds and the bees
and talking about, you know, like,
I was like, have you fingered anyone?
And he was like, yeah, a couple of chicks.
And I was like, where? And he was like, in the fingered anyone and he was like, yeah, a couple of chicks.
And I was like, where? And he was like in the out in the rotunda. And I was like,
well, as long as you're putting condoms on your fingers, mate, you made a little joke
there for him. I didn't quite get it. Didn't quite get it.
Yeah. So do you think he's going to be walking around putting condoms on his fingers now?
That when we left the conversation, I wasn't sure.
And I just...
Yeah, I reckon that'd be worth chucked,
just get some clarity on that with the kid.
Yeah, because I made the joke, and then he went,
oh, right.
And then he went, and I went,
I went, I went, wait.
Yeah.
Did you understand that was a joke?
He went, oh, go home, work to do.
Yeah, he went off and he's-
Because condoms are not cheap, you know?
So they're not.
No, I wouldn't be.
No, they're not.
No.
Well, we've had, we've done the snip,
so we don't need condoms anymore.
Oh, you've had your tubes tied?
Well, I haven't, but he's had the snip.
Oh, I got the Visekmi as soon as we were done with our fourth.
Yeah, right.
So we had the fourth, I was like, I just want to be able to blow into as much as possible
So
That's what I want to blow in your wife
Blow in at a constant rate And not have to worry about the pills and the economies.
Because it doesn't feel as good I've found.
Well, when you do that, you don't get pregnant if you've had the snip.
Once you've had the snip, and we got the tube start as well just to 100%.
So no tubes, no balls.
First of all, it's like, my all, you go into the doctor's,
it's day surgery and they do it up for you.
They do it all up for you.
They just do it there.
The GP just does it right there.
I have mind-dove now understanding just,
cup, snip snip.
Well, we had three kids,
and then 20 years later had a fourth kid,
then he got the snip.
But they don't know, they're an accident.
They don't know that.
The one that was born 20 years after the other three.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He doesn't know.
He thinks it was on purpose.
Now is that, is that, is that you, Zach or?
No, that's no one, that's just, you know, this,
these characters are a blend of people I know
and just sort of fiction.
So this is not my mother as much
as one would think. Yes.
I've got something Mark. I've got you something for you 50 years.
You got me a present? Yeah. I got you a present back.
Oh my god. Oh this is I'm hanging this up above the bar. Thank you so much. I was gonna say, put it out, put it in the garage
with all the stuff.
So I noticed you got a Elvis old,
old frame picture of Elvis.
I'm gonna frame picture of Elvis,
and I wanted to mention, the DJ is only playing Elvis tonight.
I did wanna say that.
Yeah, I did.
Only Elvis, and one of my friends is dressing up as Elvis.
And it was gonna, do us a dance. I have not asked them to do this. And one of my friends is dressing up as Elvis. Oh, man.
And it was gonna do us a dance.
I have not asked them to do this.
Okay.
Yeah.
Insisted on bringing the Elvis gear and dressing up.
And I thought I didn't want to be rude.
Yeah.
I was like, if that isn't, if you feel that you must,
so that'll be happening.
I noticed he was dressed up.
This seems to be like a man who's quite sad
and this is the moments like these
were going dress up as Elvis for parties.
This is the biggest part of his life.
It is all he has left after his wife left in.
Sort of the boomer equivalent of young men
that dress as Batman or the Joker.
I think you'll find this one for every generation.
There's someone at every wedding dancing like Michael Jackson.
There's, you know, there's,
but hey Mark, can I be honest with you?
I'm having a great time at this party, right?
That's a great party.
You're put on a great shindig.
Thank you.
I've just got a bit of a concern.
I notice your niece who's doing all the walkarounds
with the hot finger foods.
Uh-huh.
You know, I know for those tables, and those pricks over there
are taking all of the sausages and all of the sausage rolls,
and it's not getting to our table.
Now, I'm not blaming you.
I'm blaming them for not thinking about
all the other people at the party,
but they're watching them.
They're getting handfuls and putting it on their plate,
and they're not even eating it.
They're just hoarding the food.
And I said to Broden, I said, I'm happy to go over there and talk to them.
I'm happy to talk to them, I said, I'll go over there and I'll just say, listen, I don't have to be mad or anything, I just say, listen, you know, the food isn't coming round to us.
And he said that wouldn't be polite, So I went and just screamed at the waiter. And screamed at the waiter to come
and bring us food first instead.
Cause I thought that's more polite
than confronting the people at the other table.
That's all well and good.
When did that conversation happen?
Because I was here when Broden arrived at the party.
Yeah, yeah.
I was all pinned together since that moment.
So not that I'm not, I'm not doubting that what you're saying happened
Yeah, I'm just a little confused on the timeline here
Well, I think because you've been so consumed in all of the talking we're talking about wonderful things like you know
I'm doing it up for you at Woolies or Coles or whatever. Yeah
I
My head I just imagine that we'd walked over and sat down at a table
Well, this is all happening. I in my head. We just imagined that we'd walked over and sat down at a table while this is all happening.
In my head, we're still at the door.
Yeah, I was at the door.
I just assumed then when you said that there was a sort of time jump somewhere in there that we missed.
But sort of we're done with the entrance.
That's what truth.
And then maybe just somewhere when you said, I think around the present, when you said,
hey, I've got you a that was like you know two hours later
Well, that works for me. I'm happy to go with the time. I'm happy to lock in the time jump
Let's time jump again to bar. I've got something very special you got a bit for the bar
You got a bomb it don't really a bit just another little reference because I've got a present bit as well
It's not really good. Let's not build up the bar bit. No my present bit isn't great
on it but let's let's go to the bar. Let's see what's happening. Oh it's up at the bar.
Well here we are at the bar. I'm wearing a nice tunic top top. We've been at the party
for an hour for an hour.
Over an hour.
I like the glitter.
I like the sort of sequining glitter.
Thank you so much.
That's a great class.
Thank you so much.
That's just me class.
I got it in the city.
Is that from a chain that only exists in the city
or is it a chain that still exists where you're from?
It's a, it's a zez.
So you're just the outlet in the city you've bought it from
because you're in the mindset that I'm going to buy
while I'm in the city.
Yeah, so we went to my originally.
Yeah, dropped into David Jones, but I don't care
for the bank, it's such a bank.
David Jones, you know, all the toffee people.
I'll tell you what though, there's David Jones in the city,
the best piccolo in the city. I the city the best piccolo in the city
I have the absolute best piccolo you will ever have
I don't know if you can see it.
The bristas there are top class
One of them was a bloody one of them was Italian and we started talking in dialect for a little bit
Oh, were you Italian?
Yes.
I thought you were Greek.
Oh, same shit.
Same shit just across the river mate.
It's just across the river.
I don't go to the city.
I don't stuff around with it.
It's kind of fun at Park.
Too stressful.
It is, it is very stressful.
We just drive into an outer suburb.
We park at the train station.
We get a train into the city now.
Yeah.
And it works out.
Cheap but it can get a good park.
And it's so easy.
If I have to go in, if I have to go in,
I'm doing that.
Well, we get the train.
They just built the V line out here,
new V line station, just, it's 45 minutes down the road.
We drive to the V line station,
catch the V line in, luxury.
That is a luxury line up the V line. line they've got the seats they've got the toilets
I've never been on a V line. Oh we pack our own breakfast we make a little
egg make a little egg we take that we get on the
line we just head in oh it's beautiful it is
absolutely and you just sitting in oh it's beautiful it is absolutely and
you just sit in there you just sit there and by buddy put your arms up kick your
feet up let them take you in there don't worry about the asshole don't worry
about the park at all you're stressed out I'm going in whole street and and I'm
already 10 you know what I'm driving our bird street on cross well I don't
drive in the city so I just don't't, I'd refuse to drive it.
I'm too scared.
I just, I don't know how to do hook turns,
so in the end, oh, let me, oh, hook turns easy, all right?
Here, hook turns easy.
Let me explain hook turns, yeah, I can't do hook, right?
So essentially, you're turning right
from the left lane, right?
So you go into the left lane, it's very simple.
It's very simple, you don't know about.
So you get left.
Right, you know what, hey, so you get left. Right.
You know what?
Hey, let's get her off.
That's just, that's it, that's a hook turn, love.
I'll show you.
One day we'll go into the city, I'll show you how to do a hook turn.
Yeah, go on and say today or a Sunday morning at about eight or nine,
and much quieter, and just do a couple.
No, no, no, no, interest.
No, no, no, no, no, no, interest, no, interest.
No, I'd rather have a wine at the David Jones food court
and just get on the train, you know what I mean?
Now, you said before you got a present bit,
I would love to hear it.
Would you like the present, man?
I would love the present bit.
I would love the present and I'd like it presented as a bit.
I feel that the best present would be a great bit.
No, that would be it.
My present to this, to this,
pre-fear old man is the present I'm about to give you.
My present to our dear daughter and the members of the club
is the bit I'm about to do.
It might be very good. It's a too-fold gift.
It's not that good.
It's not that good.
And it's not really a bit.
It's just I thought of a good present for you that I could give you.
We could riff off that.
So, so, Broden obviously gave you that very thoughtful cricket bat.
He knows you like cricket.
It's in the, I hung it up.
In a time jump.
We did it.
I don't know who sells a time jump.
Oh, that's next time. I put it up on the Elvis bitcher. I love that Elvis clock with the
legs moving. I love that. I actually got it up next to the neon sign that says bar open.
Yeah. And so every time I get that coaxing, oh the coaxing I to, there's this place in the plaza. What's new? Oh, what's new?
Yeah, that's attached to the football boots and gadgets.
And pardon?
That's attached to the footy shop.
He's in there.
Right next year, right next to the AFL footy shop,
it's wearing in all my jerseys.
Yeah.
And they go.
You want to say, yeah.
On your garage, it's dusty, it's uncomfortable,
it's an off-putting place to be.
Yeah. I love it.
Thank you so much. That's why I've set up all the plastic chairs.
Yeah.
In the garage, right.
Yeah. I have a good time.
Well, I mean, that's your space, isn't it? That's what I say to my husband.
That's yours. He has a space.
Okay, that's your space.
My space is the kitchen and the laundry, and your space is this recreational area in the garage
Yeah, my son had his my son had his 18th of the day house and I set up the backyard did this as well
Cleaned out the garage swept it up put some plastic chairs in a circle
Party went on you know DJ
Yeah, I went out there halfway through all the kids are sitting in the chairs
Very very sad.
It was the, and they had a great night.
Now, I don't know what you've got in your garage.
Oh, in your garage. I think you're talking about my present.
No, no, no, I'm excited for the present.
Oh, it's good.
But I don't know what you've got in your garage.
I exclusively keep many bar fridges in mine.
Yeah, that's very lucky.
About 15 in there.
I just pile them up and I put,
and I've got a bar fridge in my bar,
yet I insist on having several bar fridges in the garage.
Yeah.
Now, what's your present?
So I actually got you two things.
Now I worry it's not as thoughtful as the cricket bat, but I actually got you two things.
I don't know you as well, so I did labour over this one.
So the two things out, one of them is just a barbecue set of just outrageously oversized
barbecue you tell those other biggest tongs I've ever seen in my life.
Very large tongs and the other gift in but very long.
But very long.
But very long, too long for a sausage.
And the other gift I got you, it's sort of I've wrapped them
up together as one gift, is a large cardboard box
with nine small alcohol flavored chocolates. Oh thank you so
much. Oh you've got banal leaves. Oh you've got collouer. Oh my god. God. Should we have these
chocolates over a couple of now I hesitate to say this with the kiddies around, but I won't the other day about a wet pussy shot.
What's that?
Have you guys heard of a wet wheeze?
That's weird.
That's weird.
You got milk in it?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I don't like milk in me, I'm sorry.
Very refreshing, but it is called a wet pussy.
Now I don't mean to offend, but it's a wet pussy shot.
Very, very tasty.
Jesus, crock.
I'll take my New Zealand malbra 7-ion blong any day over there.
If you don't want that, I can crack out something.
Now I only get this out on very special occasions.
If you're a ball of twisties.
I do have a ball of twisties.
Oh, sick.
There.
I add it in my pocket.
Yum, yum, yum, sick. There, I added my pocket. Yum, yum, yum, yum.
I only get this out on very, very special occasions,
because it is very expensive.
Keep it underneath the sink in the bar.
Here we go.
Have you ever had Johnny Walker black label?
Oh, you and I have one of them.
Have you got some, you want to do a shot of part of it?
I go over to the ice bucket, get myself out of can and coke, pick it up, just get all
the water off it, get the other hand, open it up, get a bit ice from that.
Oh, well, if you want, if you're going to have it with coke, I'll get the blue label.
No, no, no, no.
If you want it with coke, now the blue label is beautiful.
Oh, is that the better one?
Yeah, that's the joke there was that the black table is only one step above the red table.
Yeah, if the blue label is the most expensive one.
I have the blue label with Coke.
There wasn't a clarity there with my joke
and I do apologize.
No, but now I understand, reds you,
you know, you run on the mill,
blacks you up a little bit, red.
And then you got green.
Green.
Yeah, and then you get, and then there're in order of all the. Now I'm
pretty sure I'm pretty sure it goes this way. Alright, so that joke makes a little more
sense. You've got your red, which is the standard. I've got all of these by the way. I think
the joke just to be clear, I think the joke is any sort of brand,
with it a brand levels of excellence,
rather than the guy we're gonna get a boutique brand.
No, no, no, because the joke was that with Johnny Walker,
you've got Red Label, then the next expensive one is Black Label.
Don't tell us about that around the boys,
and I've got excited about the Essendon bombers. They will read in black
Go the book go the birthday idea
They idea
Johnny Walker would do like an AFL limited edition
You know like it you can get a you know a Sydney swans
If he's not doing it always I
They've got a game of Thrones one. That's great. That's it.
It can get all I saw fire, depending which bird you want to bang.
Oh, no.
I saw that on the news they were talking about.
Violent.
What?
Oh, no, love Game of Thrones.
Tits here.
You got Diggas.
Bums and gaffes.
Diggies and titties and just great show.
Give me love actually.
I'll watch it for the drama.
I'll watch it for the drama. I'll watch it for the drama.
I'll watch it for the drama.
I'll stay for the titties and the bums and the,
and the, oh, I love it.
I love it.
It gets, gets, gets all, all right.
Red label.
Yeah.
Then you got your black label.
Yeah.
Above that next tier is green label.
Yeah.
Then I believe you have.
Don't go. Don't go. Don't get to the greens.
What?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Yeah, try bloody, you know, that's all well
and good until everyone loses their job.
I'm not talking about you Adam Bant's here.
Yeah, I'm not talking about you,
I'm talking about you Johnny Walker's.
Okay.
Then above the green, I believe you have the gold. Jesus Christ. then above the green. I believe you have the gold Jesus
Then above the gold I believe you have the blue and you have blue I've got
Eight bottles of every single one of these right. Well, I have the blue with a bit of coke great
Let me get that for you with the hot dogs. That'll go down and treat. Oh dip it in
Hey boys, it's and treat. Oh, dip it in. Hey boys, it's, and lady, it's, it's,
it's called 30, I'm stuffed, I'm going home.
Oh, hi.
No, don't go.
I've had a lovely time.
Buffy.
It's time for bed.
Thank you for a lovely night.
Oh, you're so welcome.
I've had such a great time at my birthday party,
talking about shit that happened
and the gift bit was great by the way.
I want to say that the highlight for me, both as a listener of the Anti-Donna podcast
and as a character within the Anti-Donna podcast, was the bit where you gave me the gifts
and the bit of the gifts being given.
I don't think it was just a I think it was just a response.
I think the cricket bat,
soon as cricket bat as a gift for hanging on the wall
was referenced, I just thought,
there's more in this, there's more.
By the way, there was another time jump
where we took the bat down,
played a little bit of cricket, and then put it back up.
Well, I'm assuming I showed up at about 738,
and it's now midnight almost.
Which is a late, which is a very late night.
That's a ton, John.
Yeah, I should actually head off as well, I think.
I've only had two glasses of wine, so I'm right to drive.
Right, I, well, hey, here's to another 50.
Here's to another, another 50 more.
Cheers, cheers, cheers.
Right, I was ho-rooing.
I'm just gonna get my little Eski.
I got this from the A-10.
I'm going to get my Eski, put my drinks back in,
and I'll head off.
I love that Eski.
You've been listening to the Antidona podcast.
Thanks for joining us for another rip episode brought to you
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