Aunty Donna Podcast - Podcast Ep 240 - Wacky Zak n Mak
Episode Date: February 2, 2021We're back! Broden's not here this week so Mark and Zach will have to do without him! auntydonnaclub.com haventyoudonewell.com auntydonna.com  Join The Aunty Donna Club: https://www.patreon.com/aunt...ydonnaSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Get a legends and welcome to another rip episode of the Aunty Donna podcast.
We're back after a few weeks off and wacky second Mac, that's Haken the Reigns.
Remember, you can get access to heaps more parties justodies just like this at AntidonnaClub.com.
Hello and welcome to the Antidonna Podcast.
My name is Zachary Ruayne.
I'm sort of the wacky wanker. That's what
we'd go with, you know, bit kooky, but also a bit pretentious.
It's always been a bit more of a straight man to me, but yeah.
What? I've never seen it as that wacky or crazy. To me, you're always been pretty grounded.
That's ridiculous.
Okay.
It's pretty weird.
It's a bit way, it's subjective.
I mean, I played the straight guy in the cafe,
trendy cafe sketch, the first sketch we ever
sort of officially performed live.
But really, do I play the straight guy?
I'm playing the straight guy right now again
I think it's the irony of that
Again, I think it's you know, it's it's up for interpretation
But for me sure man. I think I'm pretty wacky
I can't think of a moment where you've gone like where you're being like a whack job
No, so I often play the whack jobs,
but I also sometimes play like high status British characters.
That's kind of my go-to.
Okay.
Which is, yeah, pretty straight down the line.
I don't know, but the fact that that high status British character
is maybe in an Australian high school,
is in itself wacky.
I'm not the center point. I'm not the I'm not the way in for
the audience. I don't know. Look again, I'll let maybe for a British audience you would
be, but you know, I think this is something for the critics to decide. No, my opinions
obviously. You've been to Britain. They're not fancy like that anymore. They go, I've been
to, if you ever go to Buckingham Palace.
I go, alaagav, would you like to go down to Landown?
No, that's not what British people are like.
British people are like, my name's Ringo and I play the drums.
That's what one British people are like.
No, that's all of, that's a lot of them.
That's why I'm British, whereas in Ringo Star, the drummer for the Beatles is like that. Wait, Ringo Star, I wasn't talking about Ringo Star, I was just of them, that's why I'm British was in Ringo Star, the drummer for the Beatles is like that.
I can't even get a piano in there.
I was talking about Ringo Star, I was just talking about,
that's like an RP accent.
What I was thinking.
You were going, RP?
Yeah.
Because what you were doing was a Liverpool accent.
No, no, I was just a general.
If any general.
And RP is not the general, estuary is the,
the accent that most British people have ever heard.
No, estuary is a hormone in women.
This is a mess.
This is already a mess.
We haven't even explained why it's going to be a mess.
You haven't even introduced yourself.
That's right, I'm so sorry.
I'm Mark.
I very much played a straight guy in anti-donna the kind of you have
He's my problem with you mark. You don't have a good perception of self. I think I do
You are not the straight guy. I'm the I'm like the grumpy straight man. Every man. I'm very much the audiences in
that kind of thing that's kind of characters that they tend to play.
And very similar to you,
we have that very similar straight man sort of grounded.
And it's-
That's absolutely fair.
And I think the issue we should explain to an audience
that that Broden has gotten an acting opportunity
we're going to-
Into the details.
We don't want to get, we don't want to go into it.
He's very kind.
That's not our thing to announce.
He'll announce that on his Instagram.
Let's just say the Netflix show has been very good to Broden.
And he's gotten an acting opportunity.
He's going to be away for a couple of days.
We needed to record this podcast.
Broden's not here.
So what we have is two anchors without a wacky boat.
Yeah.
Two straight guys without a wacky...
Without someone to rock that boat.
Two andes without a haymish.
Yeah.
Two haymishes without a nandy even.
I don't know.
That's the point of another thing.
It's very, it's the same thing, just in different words.
To what you're saying.
You are making me the straight guy with this bullshit.
I'm not.
I'm making me the straight guy.
I'm the straight guy.
But you're making me the straight guy.
I want to be wacky too.
And when you pull this bullshit,
I have to be the straight guy.
I have to go, that's a big deal.
Zach, you are audience feels,
someone is on their side.
I am the straight guy.
You are the grounded everyday man.
Yeah, I'm like the in.
Yeah, you're the in.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I'm sort of like,
Diane Nugen of the Horseman show.
What?
A Bojack.
So I am the Diane character.
You know, you go, this is a pretty wacky world.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I see myself in Diane.
Yes.
You might be seeing yourself in Todd Sanchez.
I see myself in sort of who would you say is kind of like the straight grounded every man.
Diane.
Diane.
Yeah, I would say that I'm very much the Diane then.
But then she emerged, you know, that's the thing I love about Bojack more than any other
show.
It explores horse, horse people.
Yeah.
That's its biggest theme.
And it's the Mad Extructure very much takes the protagonist, Bojack Horseman,
from a disbelief of the theme, which is horse. And then by the end of the series, he is the embodiment of that theme,
which is horse people. Horse people.
Horse people are horse.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's very interesting to watch him in the first episode,
in the last episode, the first episode, his idea of horse people
is virtually nonexistent.
That's why I love that show. You had a list of ideas.
That's why there's a ceiling on anti-dona.
This is ceiling.
Because this is what I'm dealing with
when I try to push us into thematic depths.
I go, we can still be wacky,
but maybe we can explore some ideas.
I'm dealing with people that think Bojack Horseman
is a show about horse people.
Well, it a lot of ways it is.
And in a lot of ways, it's about most people,
what I've found interesting about that show
is that there's no funny wacky character.
Everyone's sort of like a straight man,
which I really like.
You've been doing comedy for 10 years now, Mark.
You've been doing comedy for 10 years now, Mark. You've been doing comedy for 10 years.
Yeah.
And you don't even understand how the straight man, wacky character, dynamic works.
I think I do.
Well, I don't think you do.
If you think right now you're being the straight guy, I'm the one spouting facts.
I'm the one that's disbelieving and you're the one that's like disbelieving and you're the one that's being goofy
and saying stupid shit to upset me.
No, I'm holding this together.
I am very much, I'm the audience is in.
Everyone is going, how come Zack's acting so grounded
and Mark is being so straight?
That's the, that's what's happening right now
to the audience.
I gotta say right now, I was worried
that without Broden as our grounded, straight guy,
as the anchor, unless he's in a silly mood.
And then, you know, and then who,
sometimes he will drink a whole bottle of vodka
before a podcast and it's so unprofessional.
Broden shed, Broden was fucking wasted before that.
Wasted.
Like, and we have to take another hospital afterwards
because he started vomiting black.
And if you're vomiting black, that's your stomach lining
because he had too much to drink.
Yeah.
He was fucked up, man.
So without a straight guy, right?
I was worried that this podcast would be meandering.
Why?
I was worried it would be a loose-off topic.
Yeah.
Well, because I, you know, for a bit of fun, I'd do another podcast with a friend that
is also not a straight guy.
Plug it. Plug it properly. No, guy. Plug it. I just did it.
Plug it properly.
No, don't be vague.
Plug your fucking podcast.
My mission's actually like, was I'm a Rama.
It's a podcast where me and my friend Mish is in a lot of anti-donno videos.
We watch John Legg was I'm a films who's a character we both like.
Go see it live.
It's happening live at the Lido cinema.
Go book your tickets. Go to Zack's Instagram. Go see it live. It's happening live at the Lido cinema.
Go book your tickets.
Go to Zack's Instagram, book your fucking tickets.
Because I hope you don't think I'm gonna then let you
now because you've done this for me,
because I would love for you to go watch the Lido,
but I'm not gonna let you promote your ABC.
I don't wanna promote my ABC show.
I'm not gonna let you do it.
I don't think I'm not gonna let you
like this coming out February 16th. Shut up. Shut up. I don't want to out fed you I'm not even gonna do like I'm not even gonna let you promote why you like this on ABC
Go check it out right now. I'm not gonna say that. I'm not even gonna do that. All right. All right. I'm not gonna do anything
Why are you like this? I'm not going to say
like, you know, when people are like, I'm not going to let you do it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then
they say, yeah, yeah, yeah, they're like, I'm not going to let you promote it by telling them to
go to at mark underscore and underscore Charlie where you'll be posting about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
thing about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not gonna do that. All right. Well, thank you. Because
that's your solo stuff. Yeah, that's for you to do. And it has no business here. It has no business here. I've got a frog in my throat. Yeah, I heard that. You had a list of things that we
could talk about. No, no, now I'm just gonna promote my side project. But we've done it.
There's nothing else to say about it.
It's done.
Now people know about it.
If they want to check it out, they can.
If not, fuck off.
You're a dog and you obviously don't love Zack or Auntie Donna.
So, how much of a fuck can't do I have to be?
How much of a fuck can't do I have to be?
That I was like in my heart, I was like
the stuff we're doing with Auntie Donna, the references we're making on the Auntie Donna
podcast.
I'm not niche enough. I have to for my creative soul, for my creative outlet, I have to go
and do something more niche than the podcast where I played at the Disney Land Hotel.
Having known you for 13 years, I would say it's the least surprising thing you've ever done.
But like, I want to get you into the psyche of...
I understand the psyche when you're playing this for the audience.
I'm saying that you this audience. If you want to get an idea of my psyche, anti-dona was not niche enough. Yeah.
That was my initial drive because our first podcast was about season one of MasterChef Australia
where we re-watched every single episode. It was like it's too, it's not nation-off, which is yeah which is then that's more nation than your
current podcast I would argue. And when you said I'm doing a podcast with
Mishwitchrup where we rewatch every episode of season one of MasterChef, I
show that's how many years old? Ten years old. And're going to do commentary on all of it.
Not once did I go, that's a surprise.
Having known you, my reaction to that was, of course, that's what's next solo project
is going to be.
Most people go, all right, I'm doing a Tidano.
I've got, you know, maybe a Friday, free,
every couple of weeks.
What I'm gonna do now is I'm gonna bank in.
I'm gonna make bank.
Yeah.
Cause I know that's what you did with your show
cause ABC pays big money.
I...
I...
I left the money.
Oh my God.
In my joint account.
I said to Mark the other day, I said,
can you give me one ride in your Tesla?
Oh my God.
And he said, no.
No, don't get your own Tesla.
He said, maybe you can talk to Acast about having
a few more ads on your little liquids,
oh my God.
Yeah.
And maybe you get your own Tesla. Tesla said listen to your own fucking podcast while you catch the fucking bus mate
and get yourself a fucking Tesla. I have my ABC Tesla
that ABC you've paid for the big bucks. That wasn't even that wasn't even like you didn't pay for
that with the money you made they just just threw that in as a gift.
It was in the contract.
That was just like, man, anything.
Or man, the entire creative team got a Tesla each.
That's amazing.
They fucking, man, they know what they're doing.
They know how to look after their talent.
I don't know a lot about the ABC,
but I heard the liberal government recently gave them a budget of a billion dollars per show.
So now's the time to pitch.
If you're out there, you're gonna have to pay for it.
That's the time to pitch that you got a billion dollars per show.
That's just above the line.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And so, you know, put it into your fucking contract that you want to be paid half a million dollars
an episode just for being on set.
And they've got the money for that now.
Do you have any idea how much a billion is?
Have you seen the grains of rice?
Have you seen the rice?
Sorry, Mark.
I'm so sorry.
I miss red.
It's a billion a year for their entire operations.
Oh, well, that's very different.
But have you seen the rice?
I haven't seen the rice.
No, Mark, we're 14 minutes in.
We're gonna go to an ad break
and then we're gonna get on with it.
Then we're gonna get on to what we wanna talk about.
We've got some very exciting news for you all.
Not that exciting, but it's pretty exciting.
It's very exciting.
Don't give me hopes up.
Get on to it after this ad break.
Ha ha ha.
That was a great add.
I love that.
Thank you, A cast for slotting that in.
Mark, I love you too.
I love you so much, Mark.
I had a lot of worries going into this without Broden,
our anchor.
I thought we'd be meandering.
I thought we'd end up talking more about our solo interests.
Yeah, yeah.
Bullshit, total bullshit.
We did a quick plug for your ABC show.
We did a quick plug for my, for my,
for the screenings at the lead-o.
But otherwise, we have kept it on track
and we have held the anti-donna party line.
And I think we should be so proud
of ourselves Mark. Absolutely. This isn't an easy task without an anchor.
No.
No, when you've just got two straight men on this side of the microphone and we don't
have somebody grounding that, we don't have an every man, you know, it can get a little
things, it can get a little spicy, get a little crazy, a little off topic even.
When Broden said, when Broden said,
hey, I don't think I can make it to the podcast,
but you guys can do it.
I thought, gee, whiz, that's a couple of haymishes
without a Zoe Foster Blake.
And I got worried.
Yeah.
I got a little nervous.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But we are holding it together.
We are totally holding it together.
And this could potentially be up for podcast of the year
I'm not sure I don't want to say that for sure
I don't want to say that for sure
But we'll see because next year when they do um maybe the Mark and Zach straight men characters that we've got
Maybe they will be up for nomination
For the cuz on Reddit every year what happens now is there's a
like an anti-donna best of sort of like thing that's voted for by by people on
the subreddit to find their favorite character. And every year the guy who sets it
up, the user who sets it up, gets about halfway through it and then disappears
and and no one ever sees what the results are.
And I'm starting to think it's a running gag.
The first year he did it and Frog Man won.
And it was like a tiered system that this character versus this character.
It was a whole other round Robin.
A round Robin type thing, vote for your favorite one.
And then the last two years in a row
he's gotten about either a quarter or a halfway through it
and then it's disappeared from the face of the earth
and has never finished it.
And that's the one.
I don't care.
Oh, it doesn't bother me.
But next year's act, potentially,
straight man Mark and straight man Zach,
which is good, those are good characters.
Great characters, they could be up for nomination.
And then two weeks later, it won't matter because no one got to finish the voting.
Can I say something here Mark?
You worry about this campaign that you've now started.
The straight man Mark and straight man, Zach, is that it's too far away. We're a year out.
Now, if the Academy Awards are anything to go by, it's very rare that anything released
before around September is really ever truly in contention.
Maybe Gladiator, they did a re-release,
I think Titanic was a rare example.
But I don't think straight man, Mark, and straight man, Zach,
is the silence of the lambs of characters.
You know what I'm saying?
I don't think they're strong enough to carry that campaign through 12 months.
I think maybe we do a Gladiator and do a re-release.
Yeah, I love that.
I'll be straight.
Put them back out into the wild and maybe a luncheon.
Yeah.
Maybe we do a luncheon at the Beverly Hills Hotel.
Just sort of do a screening of the straight man,
Mark and Zach characters.
Talk to the various voters.
See what they're thinking.
I'm so fucking horny for that.
But we should get on track.
That's what we need to do, right?
Yeah, we've got something, we've got something,
so we want to talk to you guys about something.
I've got a list of ideas of things to talk about.
Would you like me to just run through them
and we can see if that sticks,
if that's worth talking about,
we got maybe 10, 20, 30, 40, 50, 60, 70, 80 minutes
left of this podcast.
I don't know how long we want it to go for.
I've got a list of ideas, Mark messaged me in a state
at the 2am last night and he said,
Zach, what are we going to talk about?
Fredin's always the ideas man.
He's always coming in with these ideas.
What should we talk about?
And I said, don't worry, I'll check together a list.
I did it on a little piece of paper. Piece of paper, I of paper. Lunch bag, is that a lunch bag?
It's a lunch bag. I got a Danish in it the other day.
Oh right, so just like a little pastry bag.
Stuck's up when you put the, is it, is it, um,
smatted with grease that it soaked up?
Well, I would bet I believe if it wasn't, I mean, a Danish is in a particularly greasy. Oh, well, I mean, quite buttery, like the, the pastry could be quite buttery.
Like a lot of, oh, Zach, come on, the amount of times I've gotten a fucking Danish in one of those lunch bags,
and then I've taken it out and then, you know, the, it's been see through on the bottom.
Like, that's, are you fucking kidding me? That happens every day. Every fucking day that happens.
Yeah, okay. So Mark, it's lucky for you because my first
up point is greasy danishes. Okay, well, I've got a lot to say about that.
It wasn't, it wasn't.
Now you're being on the road.
Topic, that was a lesson.
Well, I've learned it.
Well, let's get on to this.
Okay, so my first idea of things we could sort of talk about or riff on maybe we play characters is that the
Godzilla versus Kong trailer came out over the weekend and I thought we could discuss that I
Haven't seen it. No, that's okay. I like an imagine what it is
I
It it looks very much like all the Godzilla
and what it is. It looks very much like all the Godzilla movies up to this point,
which is very gray, very washed out.
And then they have a battle in Hong Kong,
which looks really, really cool.
All right.
The lights.
And I'm like, fuck, man, I need my blockbuster movies
to stop with this washed out, not even gray-scaled gray.
I have not got Godzilla versus King Kong.
He's not King Kong yet.
I think that, I sorry, in an internet theory that said he's going to beat Godzilla and
then he will become King Kong, King of the Monsters.
So he's Prince Kong at the moment.
I have no idea.
I don't know how it all works.
Is it what, whatever type of monarchy they have
in the monster world, I'm unaware of,
where does the moth come in?
Where does the moth come?
There's a big moth.
There's a big fucking moth.
Okay, I've not seen the big moth.
The last big monster movie I watched
was the Evangelion Neo and Genesis.
Two horny things.
Two horny things.
It's really huge for us.
It's so horny so weird.
It's real gross and weird.
And look, I love horny media.
Don't get me wrong, I love horny media.
There's a song called, by a band called Holy Child
called Bathroom Bitch, which is one of the hornyest songs
that I've ever heard. Some of the lyrics,
just off the top of my head, I want to fuck you in the bathroom. I want to, you know, I want to
feel you dripping from my ass to the floor. Fuck me like you doubt me. Those guys, it's a very fun
kind of like song, very horny. I love a whole I love horny media
Neon jelly-gain the Evangelicist. It's a little got too horny for me too quick and I was out
Yeah, no, I feel you man, and it's a bit pita horny as well But they're all they're quite young kids there the young horny and it's anime horny as well
Which is like another because there's a lot of this love that, which is like a horny sound that I'm uncomfortable with.
I love horny media.
Sometimes things can be a bit different.
What I would say is that's a trope of the genre
that you have to get through,
and once you get through it,
it's a beautiful story well told about fighting robots.
About, well, are we fighting robots?
about fighting robots. About, well, are we fighting robots?
Or are we, are they, are we, is it human?
No, they get into robots and they...
No, they're not robots.
They're, I don't wanna give it away,
but I think they are like, they're not,
they are not, we are, it's your,
they can't go, they're built though.
No, that's the truth.
They're birthed.
Yeah, they're like things.
And then they're like, it's all very weird.
Well, thanks for the fucking ruin in the show.
Well, maybe get through the horny and you know what you're
fucks it for me. Now there's no fucking point now.
Now I know they're fucking born and they're not robots.
So that was a good chat about Godzilla vs Kong, I thought.
I thought that was good. I thought Broden would be very proud of that.
COVID-19.
I just thought we could talk about some of the some government's responses.
We have thoughts on this. I don't, that's this kind of podcast, bro.
Well, I just thought we could help inform the audience about the latest medical responses.
Because, you are that we're uninformed and we're like,
I'm not worried that maybe audience doesn't come here for that like maybe they'll go to like a
Willosophy or something if they want to hear about COVID like I don't know if they want to cover the
COVID or the COVID cast yeah there's I'm sure there's plenty of Corona
cast there's an ABC podcast about Corona where that experts in it's in your analogy. Maybe what this can be is a redirection to podcasts that have slightly more
informed opinions on the COVID pandemic. We can move on. We can move on. That might be a better
thing to do. My only issue is there's only two more dot points. Okay. So I'm worried, you know, I think we like to keep
these pods at around 45.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We got 20 minutes to go.
I'm worried with only two dot points.
Yeah.
I'm worried that we're not going to fill that time.
Well, I think last one is pretty good.
All right.
We've kind of buried the lead here.
I like the last one.
I'll double look.
So the third one, the second to last one is Donald Trump impressions.
All right, we could do that for a little bit.
I think that would be fun.
I refuse.
I refuse because of China.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Um, huge.
Uh, it's huge.
Huge. Uh, um, my name, uh, yeah, yeah Huge it's huge huge
My name is Donald Trump
For the president of United States huge China
Feel like we've done this on the podcast so well here's my thinking right now that we've rift on it
I wrote it down. I knew that it was like,
it's not gonna really, yeah, wrote it down.
And then I thought, and then I thought,
why have I written this down?
And then when we started doing it,
it tapped into a new character I wanna do,
which is person who thinks that Donald Trump impression
you just did really got him.
Okay, cool.
Okay, so can you do a bit of Donald Trump?
Yeah sure.
Err...
My name's Donald Trump!
Ah!
You got him.
Oh!
Ah!
Oh you got him.
You got him!
Katie, surely you can put a bleach in the body.
It has like a cleansing.
Now they'll see that he's a fool.
No, I got him in the Donald Trump.
I thought maybe we'd get a bit more out of that.
Again, I do feel like we've already done that on the podcast.
Your new character was good.
It's just about the legs that it has.
And my worry that my character, the point of ridicule
I don't think was clear enough.
I want to strike him from the record.
Mobile C, he might be up for a...
No, I'd like to strike my character from the record.
I'd like to have the power to do that, Zach.
I'd like to strike.
We don't need to cut him.
I would just like to strike him from the record.
He is not canon.
In my opinion, he's stricken from the record.
The fans might have something to say.
Fans, if you could just strike him from the record, that would be great.
It's up to you, you don't have to do what Zack says, he's not your dad.
Unless I am your dad.
In which case, please let us know, we've been looking for you.
We've been looking for you.
You'd be 15 now.
Yeah.
And if you're listening, I'm sorry, I had to let you go.
And everyone in Don has done the DNA test. you're listening. I'm sorry, I had to let you go.
And everyone in Don has done the DNA test.
Zach is none of our dads.
We thought maybe he was Tom's dad for a little bit,
just because of the way you two get along.
Yeah, we did, but I, you know, Tom's older than me. That was one of the first giveaways.
That was definitely that was huge.
That was a big.
But I just want to say if you're listening, if you're listening,
and it's you, I'm sorry that I had to give you away,
the nuns didn't give me any other option.
Mm.
And you shouldn't have fucked that nun.
I shouldn't have.
That led to, I think that's how it works.
I shouldn't have. I shouldn't have fucked that works. I shouldn't have.
You shouldn't have fucked that none.
You shouldn't have fucked that none.
Mark?
Yeah.
There's one more dot point.
I fucked the none as well, just so you know.
You fucked the none, I fucked the none.
We've all fucked the none.
Everyone's fucked the none.
We've all fucked the none.
How good of fetishes that don't really have
like a real worldworld application anymore.
I feel like there's a lot of people like,
oh, I want a fucking nun.
I'm like, no, you don't.
That's not based on anything.
You've never met a nun.
I've never met someone.
I've never met someone who's like, oh, man, I love my life
and I love my girlfriend.
But I regret never fucking a nun.
And I can't get nun costumes.
Is anyone dressing up as a nun anymore?
I don't think so.
I think, you know,
I doubt there's many people left
to get in that psychosexual sort of,
yeah, fed issue imprinted in their brain anymore.
I just don't think that's happening.
Maybe there's places where there's more nuns.
I mean, I was Catholic.
I was raised Catholic.
And my idea of a sister is just like a nice,
middle, like a nice older woman who lives in a house
near the church.
Yeah, and isn't in the, isn't in the,
she's no, she wears like a floral print.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's just like a nice summer dress.
Within summer and a pants and a,
and a jacket looks like a blouse.. Within summer and a pants and a jacket.
The blouse.
She looks like for like your Nana
then she does like any sort of perception of a nun.
Yeah, just like a nicer lady who's a little bit older than you.
Yeah, so I want addresses and done and get fucked though.
That is a fetish of mine.
That is your fetish.
That's why I brought it up.
This is going well, we're half an hour in.
And you didn't even have getting fucked by a nun on the list.
No, no, so we're coming up with new ideas and that's free-flowing, that flow of ideas.
I think is a really exciting thing. I would say this, you know, is this podcast listenable?
No, no. Is it good?
No. Is it good? No.
Is it funny?
No, no, no.
Subjected.
Is it fun?
No.
No.
Is it like, anti-donna?
Is it what we do?
No.
Is it done?
Is it happening?
Yes.
Yeah.
Is it, you know, I'm thinking of this as the R&D
Yeah research and development phase. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, we're throwing out ideas
We're cutting the bread and it's gonna come in next week and he's gonna go
We're gonna go all right, but
We're a couple of boys that want to fuck a nuns. Yes, and then he can be like what are you doing?
Don't fuck a nun and we're like, but I want a fucking
No, yeah, yeah, you can't fucking on I'm like not a real man a stripper dressed as a nun a stripper now
Why a stripper dressed as a nun?
Right. Oh no and and then that's gonna be good, but why specifically a stripper dressed as a nun?
Hey strip address doesn't know. Hey.
I got your thing, I got my thing. I got my thing.
I just thought that was just a strange,
not a strange, just a surprising addition to the fantasy.
Yeah, and that's, but this is all R&D,
and then we're gonna bring it to Broden,
we're gonna pitch it on Monday,
and then we're gonna do a funny podcast about it.
This is the R&D phase.
Right. Very good stuff. No judgment on the stripper dressed as a nun.
I thank you. I appreciate that. You've got one more dot point. What's the last one?
Joe Shrek now. Joe Shrek now. Joe Shrek now. Some people don't know this. This is a great topic of conversation.
Joe Shrek now.
Joe Shrek now.
So, some of you might know our friend Joe.
Joe, Koski.
We call him on the podcast sometimes.
He's our friend, IRL, in real life. Well, he was. He was our friend, IRL.
But Joe Shrek now. But Joe Shrek now. Now Joe Shrek before what, six months ago?
Six months ago. Was Joe Shrek? No, Joe was Joe. He played, um,
Kinky Boots, Jack Black.
Jack Black, Kinky Boots.
He acted as Jack Black.
Jersey, he was Jersey and in one question.
He was in Jersey.
We prank call Joe sometimes,
but always from Broden's phone,
because Broden is the closest to Joe.
Well yeah, he'd say Broden and Joe,
hang out, IRL.
In my mind.
IRL. Zach and I don't see Joe as Well, yeah, he drove a broadening Joe hang out IRL in IRL. IRL.
Zach and I don't see Joe as much just because we're both busy with our personal projects
with our podcasts or with our TV shows that we do. We don't have time for Joe in our
lives. I love Joe. I love Joe. I love Joe. But I love the bus. I had to make a choice at
one point. Do we have projects outside of Donna,
or do we have a private relationship with Joe?
I have to be very clear.
I never cut Joe off.
No, but me and Joe,
we, I don't see Joe on the rig,
but I don't see many people on the rig,
and I'm working through that with my psychologist.
What do you mean?
I don't know, maybe it's social anxiety, I don't wanna put a label on it yet. Right, right, right, but I don't see Joe on the reg. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, I don't see Joe on
The reg. No, no, the we were very close once we went to university together, but now not so much. Yeah, Yeah. So Joe's not updating me every day.
He's reaching out when I'm in a bad place.
He's like, hey, you doing okay?
Or maybe he's going, hey, good job on the Netflix show.
Yeah.
Like I'm in a DM sort of relationship.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm like writing him from time to time.
Hey, I really want to make a musical with you.
And he's like, right, I, and I'm like, no, I really, really do.
We want to develop a musical with you and he's like, yeah, right, I'm a, but I do.
And he gets I'm joking.
Yeah, right.
Because of the, this dynamic that has been created because of the prank calls.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So I'll reach out to Joe occasionally.
Do you talk to Joe occasionally in the DMs?
Occasionally in the DMs, Joe and I will have a conversation during COVID lock down. We had a conversation about where our lives were at, our partners, our families,
that kind of thing. He also reached out to me about the show. He said he really liked
it. Probably not. I probably, it's probably less than your relationship with Joe.
Well, I have to say that I don't love Joe
and that I would want it to develop
into what you have with Joe.
I love Joe.
I love Joe too, like we love Joe.
And I think that what I have with Joe
is we were very close friends
and then I sort of, we keep in touch
but not as much as we should.
Yes.
Also, I want to collaborate with Joe on a project
and he doesn't believe me. Right. Yes. Also, I want to collaborate with Joe on a project and he doesn't believe me. Right.
Right. He thinks I'm always fucking with him. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because we fuck with him on
this podcast. That's right. But we didn't want to fuck with him on this podcast today. We wanted to
call him because Joe Shrek now. So for clarity, if you're just tuning in, became Shrek So there was no message hey, I'm gonna be Shrek. We didn't we I
Found this out. I was in bed with my beloved
Naomi Terry Higgins significant other
Not the libiscate album. No, I'm more of a fan of
Chocolate stuff is your other half
sure My half and half your
life partner sure name it Terry Higgins and she went what the fuck
we're in bed she was on her phone and she went what the fuck and then she showed
me an Instagram post so do we want to let go and then she showed me an Instagram post. So do we want to let go? And then she showed you an Instagram post.
Pause, cut.
To.
I'm at home.
Yeah.
I'm sitting on the couch.
I've just played around the,
the, the, the,
the Scott Pilgrim versus the World Video Game,
which has just been re-released and it's just great.
Yeah, what were you playing it on?
What platform?
A PS4.
Just, it's just great. Yeah, what were you playing it on what platform? Peaceful. Just, it's just great.
Yeah, it's fantastic.
So I just played around with that.
And I was just scrolling through the gram.
Yeah.
When I see Joe, now we can tell now we're
at the same point in our journey.
Yes.
We see a picture of Joe, standing in a chain dream.
Yeah.
And we go, what's Joe up to?
I know Joe's auditioned for a few things, I don't know what Joe's doing at the moment.
Then Joe jumps up.
He just jumps up a little bit.
He jumps up.
That's fair to say.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
This is a real.
Yeah, it's a real.
He does a little jump up on Instagram and Instagram real.
And then there's no more Joe.
Joe's not there anymore.
Someone else is there though.
Who's there? Shrek. Shrek Joe Joe is not there anymore someone else is there though. Who's there?
Shrek
Joey's Shrek now Joe is playing Shrek now
In a nose. No, I don't think that's the case
I
Think you know wait, so you think Joe is actually Shrek. Joey Shrek now in Queensland
And then I went to the Queensland Shrek. I went to the Shrek website.
No, they're Instagram.
Shrek, the last post from Shrek is a year ago,
they're like, sorry, got to shut down the shows.
No more shows.
So as far as I know, there's no more Shrek shows.
Yeah, that's what their social media presence is saying.
So there's no more Shrek shows as far as I know.
Maybe there is. You can do your own Google, do your own research. But there is a Shrek and
it's Joe. It's Joe. We were thinking. Okay. We would call Joe who is Shrek now. Who
is Shrek now and ask him, are you Shrek now? We basically know the answer to it, but we'd like to hear it out of the donkeys mouth
to see what I did there.
And we'd love to hear that.
I, as discussed, don't feel close enough to Joe to prank call him.
Well, it's not a prank call.
It's not a prank call, but we are using it for our own purposes. We're
sort of taking advantage of him in a way. And I don't feel comfortable being the one to
take advantage of him when I don't hang out with him enough, IRL in real life.
Yeah, absolutely. It's one of those things like, I don't feel super comfortable either.
Right. Because Broden is usually the one who comes who calls him, they hang out IRL in real life.
And this is the thing now, our generation, we're so afraid of just picking up the phone,
just pick up the phone, just call your mom, call your dad, call your dog, whatever you call
whoever you got to call.
I don't do that anymore.
No, me neither.
I don't do that with Joe nearly enough, not enough to justify a call in which we are in
some ways making fun of him, but with a lot of heart.
Well, that's my worries.
I don't want to crank call him.
I'm not a puppet in the 2000s doing crank calls.
No, man, no, I don't want to crank.
So I'm nervous about calling Joe.
But you have to call him.
It has to be me.
I can't.
I don't even know if I...
I don't have his number either.
I'm gonna call him on Facebook.
You don't have his number?
No, but I'm gonna call him on Facebook.
I have his number.
But I think it should be me.
I think it needs to be me.
Oh, absolutely, and it's...
I'm not fucking calling it.
Do you want to just shoot me through his number? Just shoot it through to me. Just text to be me. Oh, absolutely, and it's, I'm not fucking calling it. Do you want to just shoot me through his number?
Just shoot it through to me, just text it to me.
Now, if you don't know me and Mark are on Zoom right now,
recording this podcast.
So if you aren't just tuning in,
the other stuff we were bearing the lead,
the other stuff was bullshit.
Now 40 minutes in, we're at the point of the podcast.
And the point of the podcast is, Joe is Shrek now.
Joe is Shrek now.
We're gonna call Joe Koski, who is Shrek now.
Zach's gonna call him because-
I'm gonna call him.
There's no way it's okay.
Me calling him a leader.
I don't call him enough.
He's probably expecting me to be giving him a call
saying, hey, because he's usually Broden calling.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's expecting me to give him a call.
He's gonna answer, he's gonna go, hey.
Are you gonna go?
Thank you for finally getting this.
This is so nice, a social call, how lovely.
Are you, because he'd expect a crank from Broden.
Yeah, he's like, okay, but he's
from Broden. It's probably a crank. Yeah, yeah, this is the other thing. When he, and this
is my question, do we go straight into the crank or do we ease him into the crank? I don't
know what we're going to be more upsetting for him. There's no crank here. There's just clarity.
Are you track now? That's the only question.
I reckon it's a bit of a crank.
I understand that we are just seeking clarity,
but where we not rolling?
Uh-huh.
I don't think we'd be making this call.
No, and I feel bad because when I found out Joe was shrek,
I was in such a state of shock.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was like, Joe was Shrek. I was in such a state of shock. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I was like, Joe Shrek now.
And seeing the kind as Shrek was fucked up.
I mean, I imagine you've got a friend.
You've got a friend you went to university with.
All of a sudden they're Shrek.
Full, great, I have.
Just a full Shrek.
Look at his Instagram and look at the Shrek now.
It is full Shrek now, man.
He's full Shrek now.
Your friend is like, I know you.
You're my friend and now you're Shrek.
I know Shrek, I know Joe.
Now, Joe is Shrek.
It's Shrek, it's fucking Joe's little face.
Just fucking, the middle of Shrek.
In the middle of Shrek's fucking big green arse of a fucking head.
It's a really confronting thing to see your friend this Shrek.
When you're just living your best life and then you find out your best friend Shrek
now.
I don't want to accidentally call Mark also just, Mark also sent his brother Scott's number
to me the other day.
I don't want to accidentally call Scott.
We don't want to know. You Shrek now. There's no way Scott's Shrek now. Alright, so I'm gonna call Joe.
I'm nervous.
He's not gonna be able to hear me. This is not really my thing. He's not gonna be able to hear you just easily.
Joe, you're Shrek now?
Oh, you're Shrek.
You're Shrek?
Yeah.
When you Shrek?
I'm not longer.
Why you Shrek?
Is it Jo?
But Jo Shrek now?
So I'm watching.
Jo, I'm so happy that you're Shrek.
Thanks. Well, I'm not a message. I'm sitting on story.
I'm my Instagram. I say Jo,
no more Jo, no Shrek.
Yep. Yeah, that's a little, little.
I'm so happy to be with you. So mad. This isn't a job. Are you pissed off at me, Joe?
I'm so sorry. I really want to catch up with you. I really felt bad. I can happen. Broden's not here.
So he's usually the one that does the crank call, but he's pretty good at aftercare, I believe. He calls you up afterwards, he says
you do it. And I feel bad because I haven't reached out to you in a while and the first call
I do is a crank call. So this is all a joke. No, no, it's not a joke, Joe. I love you and I can get the music? Yes. Where did Joe go?
Is Joe inside sure I can?
Yeah, yeah inside.
Is it still Joe? Are you still there Joe?
Yeah, just on the inside.
The musicals never gonna happen.
Ask them about the musical.
Are you in the musical sure I can Ask him about your musical. Yeah. Are you in the musical, Shrek? No, the
musical you're gonna do with him. Now, Joe. Sorry, I do need to, I want to talk to you
about the fact that I want to collaborate with you on a musical one day. But I
don't want to, no, Mark, I don't want to blur this. I don't want him to keep thinking I'm joking.
Just bring it up.
No, because if I bring it up in a crank hole,
he'll be like for sure he's joking.
But it's not.
I do want to work with you on a musical one day.
I want to collaborate with you, Joe.
And I was saying that I think this is going to set us back
on that journey by crank calling you.
Is that the case?
Possibly.
Yeah. You'd not like me anymore, Joe.
No, I'm not saying.
Bokeys, no.
You do like me?
It's such a shame.
Why?
It's just Shrek now.
You go off with Fiona and Donkey instead of me.
Yeah, but...
Bokey, Bokey, Bokey. So Joe, here's my other question about you as Shrek, right? You're now your Shrek now,
yeah? I went on Instagram of Shrek A U and there has been a post about a new Shrek show.
You just say it's all over the show. Are you just shrek for fun? I hate it.
I hate it.
I hate it.
You just shrek for fun, Joe.
Yeah, just mother.
Joe, wait a second.
I want to see if Mark has any questions for you.
Not really.
Just can you confirm with Joe whether or not he's shrek now?
Okay, so Joe, I've got one question from Mark. Can you confirm with Joe whether or not he's Shrek now?
Okay, so Joe, I've got one question from Mark.
He's on the other end of a Zoom call.
Can you guess what the question might be?
Are you Shrek?
Are you Shrek?
Are you Shrek for fun or for real?
So when you are shrek,
you know,
do you sing
Smash Mouth?
Yeah.
I love you.
He's fucked a nun.
Jav, you fucked a nun.
No.
Um, do you have a fantasy about it?
Do you have fantasies of fucking nuns?
Anything else?
Do you have a good Donald Trump impression?
Do you have a good Donald Trump impression?
I guess.
Would you like to do it for us?
Yeah, we do.
We lost him there.
That's so unfortunate that we lost him.
I really wanted to hear his...
It would have been good to.
He's a great actor.
He can do Shrek now.
So I think...
Oh, we didn't get him to do the Shrek voice.
Oh my God.
Do you want to give him a call?
See if you'll do the Shrek voice.
Mark, it's important.
I'm so untied on this.
I'm so uncomfortable with giving him a call.
I can't even explain it.
You just give him a call, say, do the Shrek voice,
and then once he's done it, you get out of there.
All right.
BEEP.
BEEP.
BEEP.
BEEP.
BEEP.
BEEP.
BEEP.
Hello.
Joe. This is Mark, sir. Yeah, it's Mark, Joe.
How are you?
I'm pretty good, aren't I, you?
I'm good.
I'm sorry to be crank calling you.
I know, we don't, I know, we don't talk too much outside of the anti-donna podcast, and
I feel a lot of guilt.
I feel a lot of guilt that the first call that we've had in a little world is a crank.
So I just want to of guilt that the first call that we've had in a little while is a crank.
So I just wanna apologize for that straight up.
If that's all right.
Joe.
I love you, man.
I love you too.
Joe, we were wondering if you could do something for us,
because we know your Shrek now.
We were wondering, could you do the Shrek voice for us or do you sign an NDA? That stops you from doing the Shrek
voice. If you sign an NDA, I understand. But we're only Hollywood people, we understand NDAs, but if you were able to do the Shrek voice now
Because you're Shrek now, we would love to just hear a little bit of that
Okay
This is a bit of the opening narration in the show.
Alright.
Yeah, hang up on the entity.
No, no, no, I'm not gonna hang up. I really wanna hear Shrek now.
I'm too free. I'll give you the open-up in pauses so you can hang up anytime.
Yeah, keep the phone close to you, close to mouth Joe just so it comes through properly because I do I'm not gonna hang up on your promise. I really want to hear Shrek now
Sure, here we go
Once upon a time there was a little ogre being Shrek
We lived with his parents and I'm talking by a tree. Oh, it was a pretty nasty place
But he was happy because Uga is like nasty. That was
I like Joe. I want to say that I love that you've put your own spin on Shrek now.
Thanks man. That's just how he rolls when he's tired. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah, well looking that's really good. What did you say that wrap it up? Yeah, I can wrap it up
I told me to wrap it up
I'm really excited. I said we get it. We get it. We get it. You're direct now great
Did you have a Donald Trump impersonation?
What I
Can't you Joe you got gotta talk into the phone.
I am specifically what I'm doing.
What's your Donald Trump impersonation?
I'm fucking out of it.
We lost him.
We lost him.
I would have loved to have heard that, but unfortunately we lost him.
We lost Joe.
We get it. He's shrek now.
Fuck him whatever.
We were talking to Shrek himself,
Jo Koski, who is Shrek. Mark, I have had, hey, go follow Jo. I feel guilty. So I want you to go
follow Jo on Instagram. Follow Jo on Instagram. He's at Shrek now. If you at Shrek now, act Shrek now. Oh, Instagram, I feel guilty.
So I want you to go follow act Shrek now.
And then I'm gonna, that's gonna...
Assage some of my guilt.
Is that the right word?
Yes.
Yes.
Assage, Julian Assage some of your guilt.
Some of my guilt.
What a great podcast.
I feel like now's the time to wrap it up because it's gone for far too long
Which of course it was going to it was always gonna go for too long
brones a one that wraps it up
Yes, he is usually the one that wraps up sorry. I was I was sending a Joe an apology message
That's so if I haven't sent Joe an apology message we should both send them an apology message. That's so far. I haven't sent you an apology message. We should both send them an
apology message and offer to hang out some time, which will probably never happen. Well, he's in the
swamp now. Oh, he's in the swamp now. Oh, so he's not going to be there on Saturday because Max,
Max Miller of anti-Donna fame is getting married. It's going to be so much cool. But here's the thing,
but Joe, he's not going to be at Max's party but Joe, he's not gonna be at Max's party.
He's not gonna be at the party.
He's gonna be at the wedding.
He's not gonna be any of those things.
I'll tell you why.
Because he's Shrek now.
He's at the Shrek now.
Hanging out with these new friends, Donkey and Fiona.
Baaah, I'm so mad at Donkey and Fiona.
I'm sending him a message that says, are you coming to the box or wedding or are you full Shrek now?
I can't wait to hear his response, but Mark,
I feel like now is the time to wrap it up.
Alright, close it off.
Any final thoughts about any of the things we've discussed today,
Godzilla vs Kong,
COVID-19, Donald Trump, having sex with nuns or Joe Shrek?
The nunthing is something that I'll be upset if it never happens in my lifetime,
but you know, maybe I'll have kids and they'll get to fucking nun and then I can live
vicariously through them.
Final thoughts on Shrek, love Joe's take on it.
Thought he would do a Mike Myers impersonation.
Didn't do that.
No, he never does an impression and that's why he's so special in these music.
He's very much made it his own.
I imagine that's a big part of why he got the job.
Everyone else would have been coming in, being like,
I'm hungry!
And then Joe's just come in, he's done his own thing.
You know?
I think that's very impressive.
Follow Joe on Instagram at Shrek now.
Mm-hmm.
And those are my final thoughts. What are yours?
Look, I really don't have any.
I was trying to think, okay, so we've talked about a really big
myriad of themes that I bought.
What's the core of all of them?
What's the core theme of all of them?
And I think really Shrek is the core theme.
Yeah.
Shrek is a story about a green man
who loves a lady who isn't green but does matrix
and then she becomes green.
And what else is green?
Godzilla is green.
What else is green? Flim from
COVID-19. What else is green? Donald Trump. He's a green, he's green with envy at Joe Biden.
Nons. Irish Nons. The Irish flag. So I think what we've learnt here is overall there's a green. And that's I think really, if we take away anything from this,
is that green is sort of a very, like, as an idea there.
So that would be my takeaway, you know,
and also, you know, just give your grandma a call.
Give your nanoracle.
Give your nanoracle.
Oh, your yaya, whatever it is you have in your life.
Give them a call.
Don't forget, let them know.
Joe Shrek, me.
Because they might be already, they might be they get in the bus from where it be or
the La Trobelle, they get in the bus up to Shrek.
And they want to know who is Shrek.
Well it's Joe.
Joe Shrek.
When they get on the bus they can say, my son or,
or,
Mi-o-il,
Mi-o-il,
Grand-san-no.
Perfect.
Is-i-e-e-e-shrek,
or,
Season-yo.
Se-si-si,
or my grandma will say,
my son knows,
or my grand-san knows Shrek,
and all the ladies on the bus will be very excited about that.
And my non-no will be like, who are you?
She has dementia.
Ah, very sad.
Which is true, both my non-no's have dementia.
And on that awful note, thank you.
Night!
LAUGHTER
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