Aunty Donna Podcast - The Strawman Flaccidy

Episode Date: September 10, 2024

A Centurian walks into a Subway and orders a six-inch on wheat with cucumber.  LINKS  Watch the latest Grouse House series ‘Descent’ here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLqS09O_7fr09dQyeJf8FeUBP3J7fnuMsn  Follow @theauntydonnagallery on Instagram https://bit.ly/auntydonna-ig  Become a Patreon supporter at http://auntydonnaclub.com/   CREDITS   Hosts: Broden Kelly, Zachary Ruane, & Mark Bonanno   Producer: Lindsey Green Digital Producers: Nick Barrett, Jim Cruse & Tanya Zerek Audio Imager: Mitch Calladine  Supervising Producer: Elise Cooper   Managing Producer: Sam Cavanagh   Join The Aunty Donna Club: https://www.patreon.com/auntydonnaSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

A listener production. What a classic episode you're in for today, folks. Welcome to the Aunty Donna podcast powered by Patreon. Head to Aunty Donna club dot com. Aunty Donna club dot com to see the visuals of this and then a lot of other fun stuff. This is a ridiculous bit of subway, bit of Centurion, bit of other bullshit. Enjoy the episode. You're listening to the Aunty Donna Podcast. The greatest fucking podcast in the world.

Burnt like a sack and sometimes a guest. We hope you enjoy the motherfucking podcast. I wish I'd watched more episodes of Degrassi. When I pitched this I was intending on watching lots more Degrassi. Please leave that bit in. Hi, welcome to the Aunty Donna podcast. My name is Mark Samuel Bonanno. Oh yes, yes, yes it is.

Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. And we are, would you say that the vibes in the room are hype? They are Riz. Yeah, the vibes in the room are Riz. Rizzo the rat. Rizzo the rat from Hopelessly Devoted to You.

And... I don't understand that. Rizzo from Greece. Oh, no, Rizzo the rat from the junkyard animals, you know, Medigliana and... Oh, right. Rizzo, I think, is also a character in Greece. I also had a rat that I named Rizzo after Rizzo from Greece. And the last rat I ate tasted a bit Rizzy.

And Medigliana the cat. I love Medigliana. What a great name. It sounds like a disease. We are so excited. We've got a guest! To have the guest. I'm gonna head out then. Oh, are you going to leave? Yeah, I'm gonna head out and then...

Zach's gonna leave and then a guest is gonna come in. For those, he's got up, he's walking out of the studio. But for those watching, he's winking at the camera. I'm winking at the camera. To all the patrons watching on the video, just don't let them know that I am actually staying here and changing character. We're just, for the audio listeners

we want to create an illusion. Bro, don't carry on. He's gotten up, he's walked out, he's got a knife! He's got a knife! Oh god, oh god, he's gotten into the kitchen. He's buttering some toast again! He's gotten into the kitchen, he's setting the toaster to four! No! He's setting the toaster to four! No! He's setting the toaster to four! But he's gone.

And he's making a delicious cup of tea, herbal, from the looks of things. And he's got a gun! He's got a gun? Yeah! Is that a gun? It's a glue gun! He's got a glue gun because he's doing arts and crafts in the corner while we have our special guest on. And he's pulled out a bath bomb!

Fuck. He's pulled out a bomb. Fuck. That's alright. Do you want to try again? No. He's got a... Um... Um... I'm trying to think of other terrorist weapons that are then also other things. How many terrorist weapons can you name?

How many terrorist weapons can you name? Terrorist. How many terrorist weapons can you name? Stop it! We have a guest. We have a guest and it's not Christopher Guest. That would be fucking sick. I am still here.

Yeah, you're still here. He hasn't walked in yet. That would be amazing if it was Christopher Guest. Can you imagine? He's one of the greatest improvisers alive. Yeah, and a wonderful filmmaker. And a what? Film baker.

And a wonderful film baker. You know, that's actually part of the process. They used to bake the film. That's why they call it Special Effects. And that's why.. They used to bake the film. That's why they call it special effects. And that's why they used to bake the film. How does the how do those two phrases connect? In the time. So special effects and they used to bake the film. And now it's all digital.

Yeah. Yeah. Because special case baked, not fried. You know that film phrase, leave it in the yeast. Yes. That's right. Yeah, they were baking it. That's referencing the bread. So beer, bread, vegemite, film stock, actually all are fundamentally the same thing. Yes. And that was- Bread.

It was a bread maker named Johann Strauss who first discovered the way that bread could capture life. And had it vindictive towards Oppenheimer. You're telling me this as if I don't already know this is, I did a short course at the Victorian College of the Arts. Oh they taught you this? Yes. They told you about Jochen, the bread maker.

Film baking 101. Who invented film? What? Well he didn't realise the application, it was Thomas Edison that took his, what he was then calling light bread, which was a bread that could absorb the light. It was Thomas Edison that thought, well if we do 24 of these, if we make them very small. But yeah, he just wanted toast initially. Thomas Edison?

Yeah. It was very similar to champagne. He was trying to invent toast and he accidentally invented 35-millimeter film stock but why? Tall tell you about Thomas Edison inventing film bread when we can take you there right now Well, I invented this. Good job. Thanks.

Congrats. Not as interesting of a story. But the fact that we could take an audience of comedy fans to the or where... We have a guest. We are. Why are we doing this? We have a guest. All right, I are we doing this? We have a guest. Alright, I'm off.

See you later. See you mate. And for those of you watching at home, Zach is winking at the camera because the next guest will be played. By Zach. By Zach. But we don't tell them that. Tell them I'm getting up and walking away.

But to keep the magic alive, we're going to make you think that Zach is getting up, walking out of the room and we're introducing our next guest. Our guest is all the way, all the ways from across a couple of ponds. The biggest pond... Not duck. Not duck. Not duck. Not a duck pond. Not a duck pond. In fact, the biggest pond in the world known commonly as the ocean...

And we're not talking about Rihanna. Pond de Ripley. I don't know what that... I don't know what you're saying there. Pond. Replay. I don't know what that, I don't know what you're saying there. Pond. I do. Hey Mr. DJ, Ducks in the Pond de Replay. Is this a lyric from a Rihanna song? Mmm. You know about her Duck song? Nope. Pond de Replay. I think Broden's made a terrible mistake. Okay. I thought he was initially joking. When I first heard Broden talking about Pond de Ripley, I thought, oh, he's made a pun. But the way he continues to defend his position makes me think he truly believes that Pond de Ripley is about a Pond. Do you?

Terribly. And if I can advocate for my position. Oh, please. By all means. By if I have the floor. I do believe that Rhianna wrote a song called Pond to Replay about ducks in a pond, maybe watching a footage of, filmed on bread over and over. But now I'm starting to think you don't, because if you really did believe it, you would have

said something like, hey, if I can defend myself myself what's wrong with talking about Pond to Replay? Instead you said, I do believe there is a, indicating to me you know that your position is contrary and you know that it is not based in fact and in fact you know about Pond to Replay as a song that has nothing to do with Ponds. Wow. If I have the floor I put my head up and say, got me and bail me up. What a wonderful critical analysis of your friends. This is a debate.

This is discourse. This is discourse. And we're losing this ability with the internet now. Now someone would see someone that thinks p to replay is pond to replay and they would call them the R word, they would threaten to kill them. But what we've done is we've had a discussion. Now there are still the issues of I have facts on my side, he has opinions, but we've talked it through, you know, and that's interesting, isn't it?

Discourse is usually very different for me, because often it happens for me at dinner and I say, I like this one. I like discourse. Because I'm going out for four or five of them at a nice place. I would love to know from the listener how many of you saw discourse coming, because I have been working with this man for so long that I knew he was going to make a discourse pun. Not me. If I can have the floor.

That's fucked up that I saw that coming. If I can have the floor. Please, please. I did not see that coming. I saw, I thought maybe discord. I saw maybe, but my question if I, I'd love to know from Mark, did he really, does he really believe discourse is someone talking about a meal at dinner? Or is he being comical? No, I think from the way he set it up, you know, he repeated the word discourse. He set up the idea of a dinner course.

For me, that indicates very clearly the structures of a joke. I think it was pretty apparent to me pretty early on and the way he giggled afterwards that this is a man who knows we were talking about discourse in terms of debate, discussion, conversation and was making a pun or a joke, being that this is a comedy podcast. Can I ask you? Me? Yes.

What makes it a joke? Listen, you're asking a pretty fundamental question there. I believe it was Helen Razor that compared comedians to sex workers in the… Classic Helen Razor. Oldest profession in the world. Sharp as her surname, old Helen. You know that her surname is not actually a razor. No, I know.

I'm just, you know, just razors are sharp and as is her, as is her wit. Yes, yes, yes. Did you know that her last name isn't razor? You can't. I don't, I didn't know that. You didn't know that her surname isn't actually raised up? Is it a stage name? You know the difference between words and the objects they represent, don't you?

You know that words are sort of a series of sounds we've created to represent objects. Yes, of course. If someone's surname is Small Bottom, they could have quite a large ass. But also that their surname is not a small bottom, it's a word. Well, it could be. That's how it would have started. Like, if your surname is, per chance, if your surname is Wells, it meant that probably in the history of your family, your family owned the local well.

You had the hole in the ground that drew the water from it and they went, ah, that's Christopher Well. You know, that's how sort of surnames I believe first came to fruition. It was an occupation. Yeah, it was what did you contribute to the village? And if your name was, pardon? Baker is a great example. Baker is a great example. Taylor, I had a friend in primary school with the last name Taylor.

His father was a mechanic. And the Jack Johnson song. But in some way, a mechanic is a tailor for a motor vehicle. Well, certainly, but I think at that point, maybe in the last four, five hundred years. Where the product's thinking about it. Yeah, absolutely. And that's true, but I just want to say that's more of a coincidence. I think the tailor, the tailors of that family, maybe four, five, six, seven, 800 years previous, had stopped maybe with that strict thing.

And now it was more of a coincidence it was a good job to have in the La Trobe Valley. I just want to take a few steps back here and just engage with the notion that a mechanic is a tailor for cars Yes, absolutely. What does a tailor do in your mind? A tailor looks at the proportions of of any of any human being You know, and I would say regardless of creed or or religion and Fixes classist. It's classes classist. It's classist. Classless. It's classless.

Classist. Classless. It's classless. Much like payless. Shoes. Classless. Where you pay less for shoes. Which is different to paylist.

Classless. Which is different to paylist. I don't know what playlist is. Playlist is when you music and your favourite songs. Oh, when you own... yeah, yeah, of course. Maybe collect, I like this song, I like that song, I want to hear them back to back. Yes, from various artists, maybe to provoke a certain mood. You might put the church in and then you go, well, I love the cure. You put the cure and the church in a playlist.

You can't put a church in a playlist. It's a large building. Well, um. Church music, songs of praise. Oh, I understand. Yes, yeah. Praise. Or the band of the church. You can put some songs from the band of the church. That's what I was saying. Well, you should have been a little clearer. If we're speaking of praise, I always go whole egg when it comes to my mayonnaise. Oh, okay. Yes, yes, yes. Praise.

And if we're talking tailors. You were making a point about tailors. Can I just say something about tailors? What is a spare part but the patch of a mechanic? It's funny you say small part because there are... A spare part, I said. Because there are no spare parts, only spare actors. Actors. Hmm. Think. Hmm.

Think about that. Speaking of tailors, can we talk about the eras tour? One of my favourite tailors, Taylor Swift, her family of course being the quickest in her village. Don't talk about how expensive the tickets are. What? Don't talk about how expensive the tickets are. Why?

They'll come for you. They'll come for you. They? They will come for you if you say that maybe the tickets were a little expensive. Don't. I mean there is. Don't. Just don't. There are tickets that you can get. There are packages you can get and I'm not saying this is too expensive depending on your annual income. Tickets are going. There are packages you can get for $1700.

But if I wanted a pair of shoes, that's market demand. Do you understand market demand? Supply and demand. Market, you know, capitalism. Yes, I'm aware of the structures. So A can look like two things. The letter A can be two things. It can be an A. A lowercase or it can be a capitalism

A. Well, if it's an, where mine went to when you said it can be two things is an A sort of like a, you know, two sticks leaning against each other with a little stick in between. But if you were to push those sticks aside, it turns into a H. H, yeah. Which is a metaphor for how a good relationship should work. I was just thinking, have you ever seen that video that people roll out whenever an artist is charging

a lot of money for a show, they roll out a video of Nirvana at the very start of their career being outraged by people charging $40 for a ticket? No, but I, um, have you seen this? I've seen heaps of videos. Well basically there's a video, there's a video where Nirvana. We're just talking about one specific one. Double fail was one of my favourite videos on YouTube.

Having double fail. So, if we don't, if we go down this path that you're proposing where we talk about all videos ever, what happens there is we risk. Tell me what happens there, tell me. The nature of. Dangerous ideas. It is a dangerous idea but we risk losing any semblance of cohesive thought. There are too many videos to talk about all of them.

And I think the better thing to do, if we're having a discussion about media and its effects on young people, is to choose one to even a hundred videos. But all videos... Well, how many videos are there? Millions, billions of videos. Uncountable. Well, no, you are there? Millions, billions of videos. Uncountable.

Well, no, you could probably count them because it's not infinite. But more... There are more videos being created and uploaded onto the interweb than... There is time. They are being uploaded at a pace faster. I know a man who's doing a podcast about a specific character actor and that character actor is making more films than he is doing podcasts. So he'll never finish that podcast until one of them dies.

And a similar issue is, so here, similar issue here. If you started counting the videos, one, two, three, four, well already there's another thousand up on YouTube. Five, six, seven, eight, another thousand. But more specific to the point, I just wanted to point out that having seen some videos. And you have? Oh, I've seen many. I've seen dozens of videos.

Yeah, dozens. Dozens. If not, I would say at least up to a thousand, maybe a little bit under, maybe a little bit over, give or take. But having seen some videos, I don't think substitutes for the fact that you haven't seen this video that we're speaking about. Substitution is a huge part of life. Yeah, absolutely it is. Absolutely it is.

Whether it's, hey, subway, I'd like, instead of A, may I replace it with B? Sure. They will say, absolutely, sure. But do you understand that if I'm trying to make a point about a specific video in which the band members of Nirvana talk about ticket prices in 1992, that if you're then substituting the concept of that single video with all videos ever made, that's not a fair substitute. Is it reductive though to reduce us to one video? Do you mind if I use your example back at you in a volley?

Oh, I'd love to see it. Sure. I love tennis. I love tennis. Jokovic. We originally did have a guest coming into this podcast but we have gotten into such a fevered discussion and debate about the concept. This is the conversation hour on ABC Melbourne. Yeah. Dangerous ideas. You know that it's not the ABC Melbourne this is the Andy Donner podcast we're Yeah. Sure, sure. Dangerous ideas. You know that it's not the ABC Melbourne, this is the Andy Donner podcast, we're doing characters or sort of a tone here, yeah?

And of course I do. Yeah. But... I just needed to check that. We can continue with the folly of the ABC. The facade. The pastiche, I understand. And what is pastiche if not reflective and immersive?

What is pastiche if not immersive? It's my favourite flavour of ice cream. Okay, okay. Pasticheo. Pasticheo. Pasticheo. Which is an ice cream, pasticheo ice cream is an ice cream with pasticheo references denotes and references an older pasticheio perhaps you had as a child.

Yeah. May I volley? Please volley, please volley away. Like a rubber shoe. Consider this, consider the floor sand and a net between us. I would love you to volley. Sand? Ball.

I'd prefer grass or clay. Really? But I'll take sand, that's fine. There's speeds and different textures to each of the tennis courts that will make the game fundamentally different. Well I was thinking of beach volleyball. Which is played on sand. Which is played on sand.

Tennis on sand. Tennis is not played on sand. Unplayable on sand. The ball simply won't bounce. Unless the density of the sand is put to a place where it becomes glass. Firm. Glass.

Glass courts. Glass should be the next call. You know, I believe it was, no I can't recall, there was something about glass houses throwing stones. Yes, those who live in glass houses should not throw stones because it's all windows. And you'll break the glass. Yeah, and then the elements will get inside. You throw the stones, invariably glass will break.

You said something there that brought something out for me, which is that notion of windows. Isn't it not funny that a gentleman, a young man in the 90s simply said the new window is this box in front of us and while you may not be able to look directly out and see what's outside, this window. What's this? What are you talking about? This window. This window. Is an eye to the world.

What is this? He's talking about a PC, a personal computer. Oh, that's not good. Windows, Microsoft. And I think you're correct, it's not funny. No, no, so if I'm a volley, I walk into, I walk into, I walk into the subway, this imagined subway you've created.

It can be a real subway. And what are you ordering? Look, the specifics of the order are not so much. For dinner. So I've gotten a wheat six inch say. Fit chips? The fit chips, I will leave that out. It's not so much relevant to the volley at hand.

Of course. So I order a wheat six inch, should I say. And then I get the chicken. Well the order would go, what bread would you like? Wheat. How big? Six inch. What meat?

Now this is great for the volley. As we do this sort of role play, I need you to not have one of the ingredients when we get to the salad section. Could it be cucumber? Is that possible? No salad. No, no, no. One of the salad ingredients I'll it be cucumber. Is that, is that possible? No salad. No, no, no. You're one of the salad ingredients. Uh, I'll order listen.

You don't have that. Okay. A cucumber by chance. Okay. You have all the salad ingredients bar. Cucumber. Well, this is okay. Sure.

Okay. You need to pay attention. What meat? Uh, I'll get the chicken. Chicken classic. You forgot to offer the cheese. No, that comes next. I'm worried later when the toasted option Chicken classic. You forgot to offer the cheese. No, that comes next. That comes later when the toasted option comes up. Trust me to know the order of a subway.

Oh I do. A subway procession. Sure, sure, sure. What meat? The chicken teriyaki please. Cheese. No cheese, thank you. Do you want that toasted? No, thank you. Well that's going to speed things up. Absolutely. And now the time comes for salads. You've cut a minute out of the process right there. Great. Salads. Well, I'm about to add a lot of time to the process with my volley.

So I think you'll be quite surprised. I'm surprised you've been able to retain the idea of what was happening because I've lost all sight of where we are and what we're doing. My goal for this episode is to make someone listening shit their pants with what's going on. The straw man fallacy, the person who uses straw man arguments, one of their biggest tools that they're going to use is to try and distract you from the point, to try and get you off the point. Is that a tool though? Or is tool literally a drill, a hammer, a nail? The physicist uses the word technology to discuss particular kinds of equations.

Can I go into Bunnings and say, where's the straw man section? No, but do you understand the physicist uses the word technology. That's a great question. We should talk about that. Technology to describe equations. Technology tools, they don't have to be physical. It's about using, it's about an extension of the mind into the space in which we are playing. But Mark raises a great point on the straw man fallacy. Sure, I'm sorry. Well, you know, the straw man fallacy happens to more men

than you would think. It happens to most men, and it's nothing to be ashamed of. Sure, I- A man made of straw with a flaccid doodle. Absolutely. Flaccid fallacy, sure. So- The straw man flaccidy. The straw man flaccity.

The straw man flaccity. So I'm in Bunnings. I'm asking the man, where's your straw man section? I need a tool. I need, no please, I was trying to distract you from your volley. I'm very excited to see where it goes, what it is. This is my point. People are trying to get me off course.

Do you see what he's saying though with the straw men flaccidity? I do. I don't think it's as strong as discourse. Discourse, it was clean, the words perhaps have similar origins in the original Indo-European language from which they're born, flacid, fallacy, they seem to have the etymology of both I would hazard a guess are joined at some point on the tree. That being said, the words are too different to work effectively as a pun for me. That being said, the words are too different to work effectively as a pun for me. And that gets us back to that first question, comedy, if it doesn't work for me, that's not to

say it won't work for other people. Subjective. No, except for fart humor, that is too base. Now we're at the- White or red sauce doesn't bother me. Oh yes, that's nice. Anyway, back to the, I'm at the Subway, offer me the salad. Salads. And then just sort of...

Do you notice I'm using a shorthand with you now, because as a community, we've collectively bought in and said, when you enter a Subway, there is an engagement and a mutual deal that we know what we are doing here. Yes. The Subway artist doesn't say, they don't say, welcome to Subway, we do sandwiches, we have breads, these are our breads, what breads would you like? No, no, but most people going into Subway understand the concept of a sandwich. Well I think it's lovely and I think it's love that they don't assume that I don't know

what's going on. I really like that about Subway. When I walk in. They do assume you know what a sandwich is. Which is what I like about that place. They don't make me feel like an idiot. I don't walk in there and they go, okay, before you come up, so. Are there any, do you think that's an idiot though? If they started explaining a sandwich, I think they don't think you're an idiot. I think they think you're a man out of time. Potentially.

They think you're a man who has come from a time before sandwiches. It's just, I just have always appreciated. Centurion. Centurion. That when I walk into a, I'm just saying, I've always appreciated that when I've walked into a place like Subway, it's not like this everywhere. Which is in a Subway. I don't think anywhere, I don't think I've ever walked into an establishment and the

person behind the counter or the waiter or wherever that service staff member may be standing, I don't think they've ever assumed I'm a man out of time. I've never had someone assume I'm a centurion or perhaps a man who has evolved past humanity to the point where we no longer need sustenance and thus sandwiches are no longer relevant to the human condition. I've never had that happen. As far as I know, they've always assumed it. As far as you know, there could be issued... As far as you know. As far as you know. There could be someone with a wonderful poker face who sees you walk into their store and simply says...

Do you honestly... You laugh, you laugh, but there is every chance that someone, you walk into a Subway restaurant, the owner franchise owner or the staff member working says, in their minds, I, this is a Centurion. You truly believe that there are people working at Subway right now. I'm saying there is... That believe that centurions have developed the ability to travel through time. It's far-fetched but not impossible.

It's not impossible. And for them to keep a facade and poker face in guard to a point where they can judge more accurately where what time and space you're from. That's not what I'm saying at all. That's not what I'm saying. What are you saying? What are you saying? I'm not talking about.

Even a fool knows about sandwiches. The sandwich is probably the favourite food of the fool. And I agree. And I agree. I agree that the fool loves a sandwich. The fool loves a simple sandwich. A simple man loves a simple sandwich. Exactly. And all I'm saying is that I agree. I agree that the fool loves a sandwich. The fool loves a simple sandwich. A simple man loves a simple sandwich. Exactly. And all I'm saying is that I respect...

It's a great equalizer. I respect the heck out of Subway for not every time someone walks in through their doors, sitting them down and going, okay, so are you familiar with the concept of sandwiches? Sure, sure. If not, here we go. Yeah. Bread. Now, bread is milled. Sure, sure, sure. Milled flour, wheat, yeast, rising. I understand all of these concepts.

Yes. Do you understand that if a person thinks you don't know what a sandwich is, they don't think you're a fool, they think that you're a man out of time. Do you understand sandwich is, they don't think you're a fool. They think that you're a man out of time. Do you understand? This is the core point. I just simply don't believe that anyone would mistake me for a man out of time for not knowing what a sandwich is. I would posit as well that on a daily basis, there are people purchasing sandwiches from somewhere who are running out of time and are out of time. It is a, I do not have time today, lunch. It is a, anyway, back to the volley.

You are in, you are asking for salads in your sandwich. You've ordered a wheat roll. You've gotten, I can't remember the protein. Was it chicken? Chicken teriyaki. Chicken teriyaki. Chicken teriyaki. Which is no cheese. I remember when they introduced the chicken teriyaki, that was a huge moment.

Mmm. Put some sauce on the chicken. Well we haven't gotten to the, oh yes, the teriyaki sauce. The teriyaki sauce. But for me, sweet onion. Curious to know if he puts another sauce on his chicken. Well I'll put the sweet onion on, of course. Oh, yeah. But the reason I tell you this now is because we're not going to get to the sweet onion,

you see. So we're going to talk about the salads. Okay, so we're at the salads. I'm going to make my point. We're at the salads. Sure. Okay, so we're at the salads and I'll say... We need to wrap this volley up.

Sure. I'll have some lettuce. Great. Anything else? Sure. What'll have some lettuce. Great. Anything else? Sure. What kind? Iceberg? I've said lettuce.

They have lettuce, they have spinach. He's not going to ask the difference. Okay. I'll have some spinach. Which one? The small baby spinach. Great. Now that's a layer that's not realistic.

In your pursuit of realism, you've found a hyperrealism that's actually not truth. Well I am a man from time. He's a centurion. Oh you're a centurion. Yes. I've always thought that about you. That's why you didn't know what a sandwich was when I first met you.

But you're not really are you? No, no. No, not really. You're Mark. That was a mental exercise. I'll have some capsicum. Anything else? Sure. I'll have some mental exercise. I'll have some capsicum. Anything else? Sure, I'll have some olives. Why don't you just tell me the list of things you want and I will remember.

I'm telling you the list. I'm not going to ask anything else anymore. That's your choice. But, but... If you don't tell me, come in. There aren't enough cookies being prepared and I'm going to need you to put some extra cookies on because we are running out of the raspberry white shot cookies and I don't want to have to tell you again.

Liam, what I'll do is I'll finish up with this uh, Oh I'm so sorry. I did not see you there. Are you familiar with the concept of a sandwich? No, I'm not heard of a sandwich. Please come sit down. Grab a chair. Grab a chair.

Now, what were you doing out of curiosity just in that line? I was ordering a large piece of bread cut in half with things inside. It's funny that you say that because the very concept of a sandwich has just been described by you without me needing to explain it to you. Are you familiar with the process of milling? Yes. Okay. I'm a centurion, I'm not a barbarian.

You impressed on me the severity of getting these cookies out and yet you take time to present to this stranger, this patron, the history and etymology of bread and sandwich. In the effort of giving you the time you need to prepare the cookies and I want to say, Jacob, what an incredible job you've done. Liam, thank you. May I kiss you square between the eyes? Oh Yes, I Don't I've had kiss. I know it wasn't meant to be erotic to me. That was an erotic kiss. No, it's a managerial Oh, absolutely. I can see that kiss of leadership between the two of you

It was a managerial kiss. But to me as an observer, as a voyeur, it was an erotic kiss between a manager and his employee. You can take from what you will. Whatever floats your boat, whatever rocks your socks as they sail. Now continue the voyage. Sure, sure, sure, sure. I'll get some, I've ordered the capsicum, the olives, the...

Just order the cucumbers. Some jalapenos. Sausages? Well, no, I've got one more salad item I'd like. I'd like... I asked you if you could just do a list. I asked you and I told you that I would no longer be saying anything else.

But now it's time for the volleys. So you don't get to, I told you and I gave you fair warning. In fact, five or six times I said anything else. Sure, but could I just say this final item and I think you'll be surprised by my retort. And remember you don't have it in stock. Sure. I'll have some cucumber. We don't have that.

Oh, no worries. As an alternative, could I have all salads? I see your point. I see your point. An alternative to three or four pieces of cucumber, I'd like all the salads in the world. What was the point you were making? About videos. About videos. You've been listening to the Aunty Donna podcast. Thanks for joining us for another RIP episode brought to you by AuntyDonnaClub.com.

See you next week!