Backlisted - The Compleet Molesworth by Geoffrey Willans & Ronald Searle
Episode Date: November 23, 2020The Compleet Molesworth (1958) by Geoffrey Willans and Ronald Searle is the beloved book we're celebrating in this special fifth birthday episode of Backlisted cheers cheers. Joining John and Andy to ...discuss some of the funniest and most influential fictional creations of the 20th century - Nigel Molesworth, Basil Fotherington-Thomas ect ect ect - are satirical cartoonist and writer Martin Rowson and the novelist Lissa Evans, who as any fule kno was our guest on the very first episode of Backlisted in 2015. Also in this episode John contemplates The Sea View Has Me Again: Uwe Johnson in Sheerness by Patrick Wright and Andy is enchanted by Piranesi, Susanna Clarke's long-delayed second novel, her first being the bestselling Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell.Timings: (may differ due to variable advert length)10'05 - The Sea View has Me Again by Patrick Wright16'36 - Piranesi by Susanna Clarke23'52 - The Compleet Molesworth by Geoffrey Willans & Ronald Searle* To purchase any of the books mentioned in this episode please visit our bookshop at uk.bookshop.org/shop/backlisted where all profits help to sustain this podcast and UK independent bookshops.* For information about everything mentioned in this episode visit www.backlisted.fm*If you'd like to support the show, listen without adverts, receive the show early and with extra bonus fortnightly episodes, become a Patreon at www.patreon.com/backlisted Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Benefits vary by card. Other conditions apply. let me ask you lisa where you? What have you been doing?
I'm in my bedroom, which I seem to be sick of being in my bedroom.
Yeah, I'm in my bedroom where my desk is and I've done no work today whatsoever,
apart from Molesworth preparation.
Lissa, I know that you go to the London Library to write, to do your actual writing.
How has not being able to get out and go somewhere else affected your ability to produce fine prose? I've used it as
a tremendous excuse to be so unproductive over the last few months. I can't even tell you.
I despise myself, Andy, for how much I've used it as an excuse. It's pathetic. I cannot write at home.
And were you, when the London Library was open, were you running the gauntlet of the bus or what have you? I was the
first person in when it reopened and they had to prize me out with a great big crowbar. Yes,
I've been in and out of central London all the time. And in fact, that's the last time we were
gathered together, wasn't it?
Because it was in the London Library for the Christmas show last year.
Not far off a year ago, isn't that?
And somebody was reminiscing to me how brilliant the song was, Andy.
So they were a tribute to you.
Ah, the song.
Well, you know, some listeners are resistant to our musical elements.
The fools.
Martin, where are you?
Well, I am giving a completely false impression of the life I lead
because I'm actually in my wife Anna's study where it's nice and it's tidy
and it's nicely lit and it's full of learned tones
because she's doing a philosophy PhD at Birkbeck at the moment.
Nice lighting.
But she has the laptop and I haven't got a laptop
because I don't really understand any of this shit,
as Nikki will understand,
because she actually spoke to my technical support earlier on
when Anna turned her laptop on because I don't know how to do it.
And normally I'd be upstairs where I have been most of the day
and in my studio, which is organised chaos.
And I've been doing a nice picture of the prime minister's departing special advisor,
the 11-year-old whiz kid who thinks you can solve the world.
You can solve the world through Minecraft or whatever the fuck it is.
A sort of serious question how has this particular uh year in mankind's history affected your work
uh well it's uh it's it's an interesting question which has been asked of me repeatedly because
here we are in the middle of a monumental shipwreck possibly one of the most harrowing
experiences of most of our lives,
those of us who haven't lived through a world war, and most of us haven't,
where we are constantly surrounded by thousands and thousands of our fellow citizens dying
as a consequence of a hideous disease, but also government mismanagement and misgovernance.
And it's that last bit which the satirist could link on to
otherwise we would go insane with existentialist terror if we were just surrounded by all this
death and all this horror but while we can still actually blame somebody and i think we absolutely
can blame the government for having the world beatingly highest death toll on the planet
um there is hope for us because we can laugh at them in that wonderful
mocking way that satire allows us to do. And through that laughter comes the redemption
because we release all those lovely endorphins. And, you know, the aforementioned Dominic Cummings
going is actually a dark day for British satire because he was the first truly nominative
determined subject of satire,
because he's called Cummings, and he's a wanker.
Well, let's build from there.
Let's take that energy and crank it all up from there.
Mitch.
Right, let's do it.
Hello, and welcome to Backlisted,
the podcast that gives new life to old books.
Hem, hem. Today it is our birthday. Cheers, cheers. But we're at school, which is utterly
wet and weedy and smell of chalk, Latin, books, school ink, football boots and birdseed. Actually,
worse than this, some cads, rotters and swats want us to read peons. Cheers, cheers, cheers.
We have to say the weedy words and speak them
beatifully with expression as if we knew what they meant. I'm John Mitchinson, the publisher
of Unbound, the platform where readers crowdfund books they really want to read.
And I'm Andy Miller, author of The Year of Reading Dangerously, Hello Clouds, Hello Sky.
And joining us today are, on this, our fifth birthday show.
Yes, incredibly, we've been doing this thing for five years.
Five years.
It's 125 episodes, 2 million downloads or listens or whatever.
Anyway, and we are joined today by a new guest and the lady we refer to as the original guest.
Friend of the show.
First up, joining us today for the first time is Martin Rosen.
Hello.
Martin is a multi-award winning cartoonist, writer, illustrator, broadcaster and poet.
His work has been published everywhere from The Guardian and The Daily Mirror, his current homes, The Spectator, Racing Post, Morningstar and The Erotic Review.
His many books include graphic novelisations of The Wasteland, Tristram Shandy, Gulliver's Travels
and The Communistic Manifesto, a glowingly reviewed but almost wholly unread novel,
Snatches, we should do that on here, Mitch. Several slim volumes of verse,
a one-word picture book titled
Fuck the Human Odyssey,
and Stuff, a memoir
about clearing out his late parents' house,
which was long-listed for the 2006
Samuel Johnson Award.
In 2001, Ken Livingstone appointed
Martin Cartoonist Laureate for London
in exchange for one pint of
London Pride bitter per annum.
Are you still receiving that?
No, it's six years in arrears.
I mean, it's six years from when he was voted out of office.
I only got two pints, but, you know.
Well, hopefully someone listening to this
will speed you a crate of ale.
And in 2017, a full-page editorial inspired by one of Martin's Guardian cartoons,
The Daily Mail described him and his work as, quote,
disgusting, deranged, sick and offensive.
Congratulations.
I'm going to have it carved onto my tombstone with The Daily Mail written after it,
like a theatre review outside a theatre.
He has served three terms as a vice president of the Zoological Society of London, lives in
South East London and has to stop collecting taxidermy. Lyssa, we're also joined by Lyssa
Evans, official friend of the show and as we said, the original guest. This is her sixth and a half
backlisted appearance. She was on our very first show five years ago for JL Cars, A Month in the Country.
Our 35th and 36th shows, which was a combination of two episodes on Patrick Hamilton
and then a drunken minicast on Lincoln in the Bardo by George Saunders.
No one can remember any of it, even though it's on the internet.
Our 70th episode on Charles Dickens' Great Expectations.
Our 78th episode on Ghosts by Edith Wharton,
which was our Halloween episode in 2018,
and of course last year's Proustmas special
recorded at the London Library, which is our 108th episode.
And incidentally, that episode is the most popular episode of Batlisted.
So that leads me to ask you, Lyssa, have you finished reading it yet?
No. Perfect. I'm eking it out. Yeah. Sorry. As well as making us look better, Lyssa writes fiction for both adults
and children. Her most recent novel, V for Victory, set in a boarding house in 1944, was published in
August. I've talked about it on this show and is the third book in a loose trilogy following on from Old Baggage and Crooked Heart. Before she was
a writer she produced and directed radio and TV comedy. She considers her funniest book to be the
Carnegie shortlisted Wedwabbit. Ostensibly for children, this seems to have a link with the book
we're going to be talking about doesn't it? Ostensibly for children though to be honest it
could be seen as an allegory for almost anything. She read the audiobook herself're going to be talking about, isn't it? Ostensibly for children, though, to be honest, it could be seen as an allegory for almost anything.
She read the audiobook herself
and had to invent a different voice
for each of seven different colours of Wimbley Woo,
as well as a six-foot plastic carrot.
She was hoarse for two days afterwards.
Do you read your adult stuff, Lissa?
No, nobody asked me to,
but I insisted on doing this one.
I just spend so much time getting jokes perfect when I write them.
And I just couldn't bear the thought of hearing a joke read wrongly.
So you've got jokes read correctly by somebody who's not really an actress as opposed to a brilliant actor not doing the jokes quite perfectly.
I did massively enjoy doing it.
You know, the precision of it was very pleasing.
There is no audio book of The Complete Molesworth.
Well, there we go.
The book that Martin and Liz are here to discuss
is The Complete Molesworth,
first published by Max Parrish & Co. Ltd. in 1958
and reissued in expanded form as Molesworth by Penguin Books in 1999 and then in Penguin
Classics in 2000. We'll say a bit more about what the complete Molesworth consists of,
it's slightly complicated. It is. But we'll come on to that shortly. But not so fast John,
cheers cheers. What better way to mark five years of doing this than to ask
what better way to mark five years of doing this than to ask what have you been reading this week aha thanks for asking me andy um i have been reading a very big book it's called the sea view
has me again uh the subtitle is uve johnson in sheerness by that uh notable uh historian
some might say psychogeographer, although I wouldn't.
I think he's a historian.
Patrick Wright.
It is a 670-page.
What is it?
That's a really good question.
I think it's two things.
A book and that.
It's a book.
It's a history.
It's a history of Uwe Johnson, the great East German writer who arrived in the UK in the early 70s and lived for a decade in Sheerness. It's 26 Marine Parade Sheerness.
If it were light outside, I could see it from here. on the Isle of Sheppey. It is also a history, a geography, a gazetteer of the Isle of Sheppey,
this strange kind of island in the Thames estuary. And it's entirely fascinating on both those
levels. I've never read any of A. Johnson. He is one of those writers, suppose that came out of the separation of Germany into two states
he was an East German he escaped into the West into the New York in the 60s and as I say fetched
up much to the surprise of all his friends and to the shock of his friends, who included people like Hannah Arendt and Siegfried
Unset from Surkampf, his publisher, who one of the many things that is kind of interesting about
this book is the relationship over a period of time of a great writer writing his masterpiece,
Anniversaries, his masterpiece, which is four volumes, a huge cast of characters over a long historical period set in America.
None of it is set in Sheerness, but he did write quite a bit of certainly the fourth volume of the four in Sheerness.
So it's an amazing feat of research.
He gives you the newspapers.
Johnson, the novelist, was obsessed with newspapers,
particularly the Sheerness Guardian,
which had some fantastic headlines,
cats escaping from the cattery, that kind of thing,
the usual thing, Sheernesserness man in human in human torch mystery um there's
there's social history there there's kind of uh the the there's the history of the 19th century
hulks the fights between you know obviously sheerness like a lot of these places became
holiday cottages for uh for east enders uh there's there's a of drinking. I'm going to read you a passage. You described this to me as being like,
a bit like W.G. Seybelt,
if he had written a 680-page book
rather than a 200-page book.
It's kind of, it's like,
I think I might have said Seybelt on steroids.
Let me read you a little bit.
This is Johnson.
He liked to drink, and he liked,
this is the pub he used to hang out in in which was called the napier tavern so the republican ronald
peel told jens that's the reporter that's that's that's that was one of the people who wrote about
johnson after he died that johnson had always turned up at the same time in the evening
stepping into the napier tavern saloon bar with a brief good evening, or good heavening, as Johnson himself imagines in the
registering his pronunciation, and then taking his customary place on a high wooden barstool
with a seat upholstered in red synthetic leather of the type Tom Waits was in those days hymning
as Nougahyde. He allegedly always wore the same distinctive garb too,
a black peached watchman's cap, a black jacket,
black trousers, black leather boots,
and sometimes a thin black tie.
The same gear, in other words, that had shocked Michael Hamburger,
who had been astonished to find this highly, the translator,
who had been shocked to find this highly regarded
and sensitive writer going about in such garb.
Even the astrays on the bar had to be black at his request, and to make matters worse he would
insist on having two, one for stubs of the French cigarettes that stank so disgustingly
to Peel's frankly English nose, and the other for the matches which Johnson, in a gesture that
confirms other accounts of the exactness with which he measured his progress
along the road to ruin would line up in an orderly row as he made his way through the
carefully counted cigarettes he allowed himself over a two-hour visit 11 cigarettes eight pints
of hurleman and also that's a german lager and also just before returning home a double vodka
with tomato juice ice ice and lemon,
but without Worcester sauce, served in a large glass.
Such was the alleged tally by the end, Peel told Jens,
rounding off his betrayal by adding not just that he'd been obliged
to order in a special supply of Galois,
but that he had to return the entire stock to the supplier
after the writer's death, since none of his other customers
would dream of smoking these pungent foreign things anyway without giving away too many spoilers he he dies
in living on his own he he separates from his wife he ends up living in 26 moraine parade he dies and
is not found for three weeks uh there's a i mean a little detail. One of the reasons he wasn't found
is that he drank his tea and his coffee without milk.
So the usual telltale piling up of milk bottles
on the doorstep didn't happen.
Well, this is how Backlisted celebrates his fifth birthday,
with a 680-page and thoroughly miserable account
of a man drinking himself to death in Sheerness.
Fantastic.
Well, I loved every scrap of it.
I have to say, I found it completely compelling.
And that might tell you more about me than...
It's been a hard year.
It's a hell of a lockdown read.
Literally everything that has ever been written
and has ever happened on the Isle of Sheffy
is contained in this book. How will I follow it? How will I follow this?
The Sea View Has Me Again by Patrick Wright. Patrick Wright, brilliant writer, great book.
Andy, what have you been reading?
I've been reading Susanna Clarke's new novel, Piranesi, which is her first novel since
Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell, which many of our listeners will have read.
I'm sure lots of people have been reading Piranesi in the last few weeks, couple of months.
It's quite a hard novel to talk about because the less you know about it, going into it it the better. I had strenuously avoided all reviews. I didn't even read the jacket
copy because I didn't want to know anything at all about the book going in with the result that
a significant proportion of the book was mystifying to me. But what I'm going to say to listeners is
if you want to fast forward by four and a half minutes you should probably do that. If you're
planning on reading this book or you like the sound of what i've just said i'm not going to reveal any spoilers but but the less you know
the better so you could feel totally happy to to to go ahead slightly and get on to the molesworth
discussion okay they've gone those lightweights uh we can uh we can carry on talking about the
susanna clark you know how every so often a book comes out. I don't read loads of new fiction, obviously,
because for professional reasons and also my sympathies tend to be
with older books, out-of-print books, dead authors, not living ones,
not troublesome living authors, but safely in the ground authors.
And I'm very sceptical of novels which are hailed for speaking
for their moment, unless they're by Ali Smith.
I've just read a book by an author who shall remain nameless, which was spoiled totally by the sense that the author concerned was straining every sinew to capture what they thought the year 2020 was going to be when they wrote it.
And obviously they've fallen completely flat on their face because things have turned out rather differently whereas Susanna Clarke's Piranesi I hate the phrase speak to
but seems to speak to this year and this particular moment and us living in our bubbles and in our
various isolation with a sense of menace outside that we can't quite quantify incredibly skillfully and adeptly. And I said
that I found the beginning of the book quite mystifying. That's what Susanna Clarke wants.
And by the end of the book, I was just totally gripped by it and very, very moved, very moved.
I haven't read a new piece of fiction which manages to marry intellect and imagination. I don't even know generically
what it is. I suppose it's science fiction, but it isn't pure science fiction. It's a really
fascinating novel about dislocation. And given the gap between her novels and the fact that I believe she has been very ill in that period, one could also read it as a metaphor for isolation via illness, about never leaving a particular space and having to go outside by going inside, by going into one's head and into one's imagination.
into one's head and into one's imagination.
So the book is set in an imaginary, what seems to be a museum, albeit a very strange museum,
a vast museum full of statues, seemingly without end.
And all I will say about it is, as the book goes on, figures such as, for instance, Alistair crowley or rd lang come into this picture and um
the narrator in the third chapter the third chapter is called
a list of all the people who have ever lived and what is known of them and i'll just read you a
tiny bit of that entry for the 10th day of the fifth month in the year
the albatross came to the southwestern halls. Since the world began it is certain that there
have existed 15 people. Possibly there have been more but I am a scientist and must proceed
according to the evidence. Of the 15 people whose existence is verifiable, only myself and the other are now
living. I will now name the 15 people and give where relevant their positions. First person,
myself. I believe that I am between 30 and 35 years of age. I am approximately 1.83 metres tall and of a slender build. Second person, the other.
I estimate the other's age to be between 50 and 60. He is approximately 1.88 metres tall and,
like me, of a slender build. He is strong and fit for his age. The other and I are searching
diligently for the knowledge. We meet twice a week
on Tuesdays and Fridays to discuss our work. The other organises his time meticulously and never
permits our meetings to last longer than one hour. If he requires my presence at other times,
he calls out, Piranesi, until I come. Piranesi, it is what he calls me, which is strange because as far as I remember, it isn't my name.
Third person, the biscuit box man. The biscuit box man is a skeleton that resides in an empty
niche in the third northwestern hall. He goes on, other persons include the concealed person,
other persons include the concealed person, persons 5 to 14, the people of the alcove,
the 15th person, the folded up child. The folded up child is a skeleton. I believe it to be female and approximately seven years of age. She is posed on an empty plinth in the sixth southeastern hall.
Her knees are drawn up to her chin. arms clasp her knees her head is bowed
down and he ends the 16th person you who are you who is it that i'm writing for are you a traveler
who has cheated tides and crossed broken floors and derelict stairs to reach these halls?
Or are you perhaps someone who inhabits my own halls long after I am dead?
I really want to read this. I really want to read it.
I thought this just was spectacular and also really exciting.
You know those occasional moments you have where you think,
gosh, that book's a bestseller.
That's on shelves in virtual bookshops all over the country.
Well, in fact, in real bookshops all over the country, but we can't necessarily access them easily.
But I cannot recommend that highly enough.
Susanna Clarke Piranesi, published by Bloomsbury.
Great. That little bit you read just gave me a slight
Rob Shearman feel.
Robert Shearman,
a bit of Neil Gaiman.
Yeah, a bit of Gaiman.
Calvino.
A bit of Borges.
Yeah, Borges, definitely.
And yet,
how often are we gripped
by a novel by Borges?
Not necessarily terribly often.
Or Calvino, let's be honest.
Susanna Clarke, I think, like I said, head and heart. Brilliant, brilliant book terribly often. Or Calvino, let's be honest. Susanna Clark,
I think, like I said, head and heart. Brilliant, brilliant book. Fantastic. That's really good.
We'll be back in just a sec. Lissa, where were you when you first became aware of the gorilla
of whatever he is, St Custard's, Nigel Molesworth. Do you know, I've got a really, really clear memory of it
because I was living in Surrey with my parents, I was about eight, and we had a sort of kitchen
diner, and I remember the milkman came to the door, back door, which opened the kitchen,
and my mother had to explain to the milkman what that noise was and that noise was me sitting in armchair hysterical
reading molesworth i could not speak and and the effect on me was phenomenal i mean
so i was about eight and i think by then i'd read a lot i'd read early and i'd read probably most of
the narnia books i'd read I'd read Mrs Molesworth's
high Victorian imaginative writer I've read a lot but I'd read proper books and this was
this was anarchy I mean you know part of its impact yeah yeah was that there was nothing
else like it at the time you know the the terrible idiosyncratic spelling the cartoons
instead of illustrations um you know but the
lack of structure the lack of plot the lack even of sentence and and the fabulous sarcasm the
slapstick they but you know the cool protagonist sitting there taking the world apart with whatever
verbal weapon he could get it was it was like you know molesworth was driving a tank over the kind
of books i'd read and i was next to him and and and he was crushing normal narrative you know
beneath his caterpillar wheels caterpillar spelt with one l and and i had never read anything like
it and i internalized vast numbers of the best lines. And for years, they came out in my own writing, not the actual lines, but the rhythm of them, the shape of them.
They provided me with a permanent pattern of what a funny line feels like.
And for me, that was, you know, that's an extraordinary turning point.
My whole life in some ways has been about comedy. produce radio and television comedy i i write funny lines and
i know what they're supposed to feel like because because that's what jeffrey willans gave me and
and and you know they they propelled me into the life i lead in some ways gosh that sounds profound
but they did that's why we asked you that's why we always
ask you back but the pros we're gonna we're gonna talk to you in a moment about the other half of
the equation i mean i so enjoyed at mixed are very jangly times i i so enjoyed having an excuse to sit
and read these from cover to cover again over the last week or so and listen
i i totally agree with you about the prose it's just it's just the the rhythms of it and the and
the economy of it and also you write the anarchy of it because you don't know where it's going to
go next and the variety of it there is there is you know the broadest of slapstick there's the skeletto
footnote that digs in underneath the bland prose there's the satire that you know which builds and
builds as you get older but you know the parody the pastiche you know he's had a huge variety of
of techniques which he uses with molesworth martin, that's Geoffrey Willans spoken for.
I want to ask you, can you remember,
you're obviously an eminent cartoonist.
Can you remember when you first became aware of Searle as Searle,
as opposed to someone whose work you were familiar with?
I mean, or perhaps can you remember the first time
you saw a Searle cartoon and laughed? laughed well it's interesting because um you know seoul has been declared by
the majority of my profession to be the greatest british cartoonist of the 20th century and i think
that's unquestionably true um but i discovered seoul like many people, through Molesworth, because he was no longer current by the time I became aware of political cartoons, which I started becoming aware of when I was nine or ten.
In fact, I could date almost precisely the moment when I realised I wanted to be a cartoonist, when I stole my sister's history school textbook when I was about 10 years old and started thumbing through it. It was full of
Gilrays and Cruikshanks and Rowlandsons and Tenniels and Daily Lows. And I thought, this is
what I want to do. And I went and found some pens and started trying to draw like Gilray etched.
But I remember precisely when I first bought Whiz for Atoms uh i have a crystal clear memory of being 10 because my mother died when i
was 10 and i suddenly found that uh the best way to cope with that was through books and there was
one book which maybe we can talk about some other episode of this uh called um let's kill uncle
which i've spoken about many times oh yeah it was a absolutely fantastic book but also i remember
at my god-awful prep school,
high church Anglican prep school,
where they had a book fair
where people would come around and sell books
and I was given some money to go to the book fair.
And I was already reading Let's Kill Uncle
and I thought, you know, what's something else?
And I was already immersed in cartoons,
but the kind of cartoons I was immersed in at that stage
was probably people like Felwell and so on,
you know, the great punch cartoonists who were around.
And, of course, Searle was no longer around.
He had fled to France in 1961.
And I saw Whiz for Atoms.
I just thought, well, that's a great cartoon on the front of there.
And was immediately sucked in to this magnificent world.
And it was as much for Willans as it was for Searle that they were almost perfect collaborators.
Which is really bizarre because if you look at the history of collaboration between writers and cartoonists,
it's always been a sort of slightly uneasy one.
I've had relationships with various,
in a professional way, with various writers.
I've found it easier to actually write my own stuff
to illustrate because you don't have to deal
with the bloody writers that way.
But, you know, Ralph Steadman's relationship
with Hunter S. Thompson was much, much lairier
and more unpleasant than yeah Ralph often chooses to
remember but these two seem to be made for each other although it was in fact set up because
Searle was so fed up with some of the St Trinian's girls which he created we can talk about them a
bit more in a minute that he wanted to try something else we've got a clip here which
from Ronald Searle himself from uh and I've I've kept
in the introduction for this because I think it's just well you'll you'll hear why this was
Channel 4 News in uh 2010 ran an interview with Searle on the occasion of his 90th birthday
and they went to the south of France to interview interview him so so here it is he's our foremost
graphic artist as any fool know that's f u l e k n o ronald searle the illustrator of millsworth
and creator of st trinians is 90 tomorrow he's given his first television interview in 35 years
to our arts correspondent nicholas glass who joined him for a glass of bubbly in the south of france
ronald searle regards in trinians as just a single chapter in a long working life.
Intrinions stuff came up quite accidentally.
They got published, it only lasted six years.
My principle has always been the moment it's successful, kill it.
Because it can only get worse.
But basically I was more interested in illustration and reportage.
Of course, the British still feel safer with the comic appeal of Nigel Molesworth
and his prep school, St Custards,
a glorious collaboration with the writer Geoffrey Willans.
It was a potpourri of ideas between Searle and Willans that actually made a book. People like it.
They still like it curiously enough.
I was going to say, do you have an explanation?
Well, not really, because in fact those days have gone. But there's a basic public that still run around crying,
as every fool knows.
Oh, hallow clouds, hallow sky.
I don't know, it's a sort of cult thing.
And it dribbled on.
And it dribbled on.
There we are.
That's what we've gathered to celebrate
i don't know how the collaboration took place maybe martin can talk about it but what i love
about it is the feeling that that it was quite random in some ways you know sometimes there's
illustrations which have nothing to do with the text i think the ghoul going into rome and then
the ghoul coming out that's what comes out what comes out of nowhere, but it's a beautiful, it's a beautiful illustration, very funny, but where's it come from?
John, they give one another a lot of space, don't they? It struck me reading it again.
Yeah. It's so rare to get words and pictures to work like this. I mean, I suppose, you know,
you're thinking collaborations, you know, Quentin Blake and Dahl. I love the surreal element to it.
And I particularly, I've always loved the Gaul. And it's funny, you go back to it. I mean, I read it,
I suppose I read it when I was, I would have been about 10 when I first picked it up. And
like you, they said, had absolutely, unlike a lot of people who went to prep schools and who had
kind of, my school was just an ordinary, it's just an ordinary primary school. But that's the thing,
it doesn't matter. You don't have to have those references the kind of brilliant pictures of teachers they're just people
in authority aren't they philip hensher says that you know he went to a comp our former guest philip
went to a comp um he says in his introduction to the complete molesworth that he was appalled when
he was re reading molesworth which he loved one day and realized that he was onealled when he was reading Molesworth, which he loved one day,
and realised that he was one of the oiks
that Nigel Molesworth was fulminating against,
always being warned off.
But it doesn't seem to matter, Martin, does it?
That sense that Searle says about the world isn't like that anymore.
Well, it clearly isn't.
It's an interesting clip.
I mean, the essential thing about this collaboration is they were equals,
which is not always the case between an illustrator and a writer.
It can actually go one way or the other.
But in this case, they are absolute equals because, as you said,
they give each other enough space to go and do their own thing.
So, you know, Willans mentions a gerund,
and suddenly you have this wonderful series of drawings of a gerund going
off rebuffing a gerund div and not allowing it to be part of its sentence but um searle you know
typically of the man he um rather grumpily dismissed the genesis of his own art because
one of the essential things about Ronald Searle was
of course that he was a prisoner of the Japanese from the age of 20 for the next four and a half
years working on the Burma railway he was in Changi jail you know saw things of a type which
none of us I hope will ever witness and felt compelled to bear witness to it. So he was actually
drawing at the same time, managed to get drawing equipment. Had he been caught with this stuff,
they would have killed him on the spot. So he used to hide the drawings underneath the mattresses of
his fellow prisoners who were dying of cholera. So knowing that was the only place the Japanese
guards wouldn't search. And you look at these drawings and they're extraordinary. And they are actually documentary evidence of war crimes.
He said, he was asked, you know, about building the railway.
And his brilliant answer was, one didn't think it was a railway.
It was just murder.
Yeah, exactly, exactly.
But as I said, this is exhibits A to Z and then on again of war crimes.
And you look at sort of drawings like British and Australian prisons of war dragging wagons with tree trunks on them,
being used as beasts of burden or even more horrific
Burmese peasants heads beheaded you know decapitated heads on a row with sort of Japanese
soldiers laughing because they'd been caught pilfering off the Burma railway and they'd been
executed and then you look four years later to stuff that Searle was doing in the St Trinian's
series and you see little girls pulling a roller
on sports day saying I bloody hate sports day replicating the image of the British and Australian
prisoners of war being used as beasts of burden and another one of a St Trinian's girl sharpening
a knife on a knife sharpener with a row of heads on the shelf above her and the headmistress coming
in and say this is Bertha she's our head girl now this is this is the most extraordinary thing about seoul that he
rather than going into deep trauma although he was in deep trauma is why the reason he abandoned
his family 15 years later was that he retold tragedy for jokes he did that thing where you
actually find redemption through laughter.
And Willans does exactly the same thing.
And actually, I had never realized this before I started rereading this again in the last week.
Right at the beginning of Down with School, about page 14, where it's the beginning of term, two short speeches for headmasters.
And it says, I would like to to introduce and it's got footnotes
to explain what's going on i should like to introduce a new master who have joined us in
place of mr blenkinsop who left suddenly footnote nine who would have thought he seemed so nice
i feel sure that he will find fill the place occupied by his predecessor
footnote 10 not too faithfully, I sincerely hope.
And actually, right at the beginning,
you're talking about paedophilia.
I mean, it's clearly what you're talking about
because it was the background hum,
the fucking enormous elephant in every single school room
in a prep school.
We had one in my prep school
because they caught up with him after 50 years.
And you were also dealing with, of course, post-war,
many traumatized soldiers
who didn't know what else to do so who went into schools and took out their various post-traumatic
stress disorders on their on their young pupils right listen is that is that why is is man's
inhumanity the map to man a perpetual theme the reason why we don't get too hung up on it being a 1950s prep school for
lower middle class children yes i i think so i've been puzzling as to what why i connected or we all
connect so greatly with it but the darkness of it appeals to to children as much as it does to
adults and and and i grew up with some book of St Trinian's cartoons as well
and read the introduction about the Serle and Japanese prisoner of war camp.
And the darkness of it makes the laughter feel dangerous as well.
There's a fantastic cartoon of Molesworth 1 and 2
setting a trap for Father Christmas.
And the trap is a gigantic Spikes man trap,
which would actually cut someone in half.
And it feels naughty and also horrible to laugh at these things,
but it's liberating as well.
Far darker than most children's fiction.
The darkness of it is something...
Here's a clip from Desert Island Discs in 2005.
Searle actually did Desert Island Discs twice,
and I'll say a bit more about the differences
between his two appearances in a minute.
But here he is talking about some of the very things
we've just been discussing.
If you could only take one of those eight records, Ronald,
which one would you take?
One of those records?
Only one.
Well, I think the last one.
No problem.
I mean, if I want to have an uplift stuck on an island,
there's no doubt about it, champagne,
even listening to it, I don't have to drink.
My leg is in the air.
And what about your book?
As you know, you get the Bible in Shakespeare.
Ah, yes. Well, you know, I thought
about, you know, I'm fascinated by history and fascinated by people. And I thought, well, what
I'd love to have is a recent publication, which is the Oxford Dictionary of National Biography.
But the problem is, it's in 60 volumes. So I thought, if you could persuade Oxford to bind it into one book it'd be rather like a concertina
but I'd like to take that
as my one book
and your luxury, what would that be?
oh champagne, no actually
I had thought that my luxury would be
a mosquito net because I know that when you're stuck
on an island you're going to be eaten
alive anyway by insects
then I thought oh to hell with that, let's have
champagne, because what
i would do is i would drink this i would have the best possible bottle of champagne probably crystal
roger and then i would write a note put it into the bottle throw it into the sea saying please
send another one so putting himself in that tradition uh we would agree with him right that that he's in that kind of savage uh uh i don't know yeah i
mean the um i've discovered as i have traveled around the world talking to cartoonists from
unhappier countries than ours um where they don't have our 300 year long tradition of doing genuinely
hideous pictures of our betters. And they recoil sometimes in horror.
And I say, we've had 300 years of this.
This is what we do.
This is, you know, we're part of the conversation.
How else would you draw the Prince of Wales
except as an obese lecher riddled with syphilis?
I mean, there's no other way to draw.
Otherwise, you wouldn't recognise him as the Prince of Wales.
And he also manages to introduce a note of vicious politics in into
into quite light-hearted things on on parents day the headmaster takes the schoolmaster through a
series of questions and he realized the series of questions actually a stalinist show trial
in which they're having to admit to having sabotaged the school piano.
And it's absolutely extraordinary.
I mean, Philippa Henscher actually, I didn't know her,
in his introduction says,
unstoppable satirical verve and a startling width
of cultural, political and philosophical range.
That's absolutely true.
He snatches politics from all over the place
and from the most vile
history. He uses
examples to make us laugh.
But there's also
just wonderful absurdity of it.
So in that thing Lisa was just
referring to, in that
interrogation, they suddenly say,
who invented the steam engine?
Answered Joseph Stalin.
Yeah.
Lisa, I'm going to ask you to read in a minute, but I want to just talk to you a bit about,
from a writer's point of view, from a comedy writer's point of view, it struck me going back
through these books again. One of the genius things that Willans does with the character
of Nigel Molesworth is although Molesworth speaks for, you know, all horrible schoolboys,
actually the brilliance of it is that Nigel Molesworth is a very specific character. He's a
unique character. So lots of the jokes are coming out of character. Once you get to know him,
and I was thinking, you're talking about his uh the parents drinking clearly nigel molesworth
is a very creative boy who's who's writing and drawing and and is able to do creative writing
like uh the his prunes essay but he's wildly underappreciated genius he's a lonely genius
one of the great insights into
reading them again,
we haven't even mentioned Fotherington Thomas,
but I'm going to say, if you read all four books
through and they take on the quality of
a novel, the story
of the novel of The Complete
Molesworth is Nigel
Molesworth realising
he could be friends with Fotherington
Thomas.
As the books go on, they become more like equals. Nigel Molesworth realising he could be friends with Fotherington Thomas. Yeah, yeah.
As the books go on, they become more like equals.
And it struck me that's totally right.
That's right to the character of Nigel Molesworth, right?
And that's why it's funny.
Yes, Nigel is never going to be like others.
And he's viewing this from on high. You know, he's a lowly schoolboy,
but actually he's like God in these books.
He understands what's going on in everybody. He sees world politics and is able to inject it into his own environment.
You know, Nigel is omniscient.
It's absolutely extraordinary.
I have a sneaking suspicion, actually,
you can tell by the way he looks that actually
Nigel Molesworth grew up to be Jonathan Meads
oh yes that's perfect
the way he
stares at things it's perfect
isn't it
would you be kind enough to audition
for the audio book
absolutely I'm going to read a bit
it's called All About
Armand which is about um
molesworth's well basically it's about his french textbook everyone know that armand is a wet because
he wear that striped shirt and city store hat in lesson 6a armand has just entered into salamanger
from the jordan he entered not to pinch something to, but to give Mama the jolly fleur which he had picked.
Papa is pleased.
Papa is not worried,
as he jolly well ought to be at this base conduct.
Papa is highly delighted.
Thou art a good boy, Armand, he said.
This afternoon I will take thee to the zoo.
Ah, you think.
Papa is not so dumb as he look.
He will throw Armand to the lions.
Are there any animals in the zoo?
Asked Armand.
Oh, but yes
said Papa without losing his temper at this feeble question. Hopla hopla I am so happy.
Perhaps the lions are not bad enough perhaps it will be the loops. The loops could indubitably
do a good job on Armand. Is it with these thoughts that Papa go hand in hand with his little son?
They pay 10 sous. They pass through the turnstile. They enter into zoological gardens. They look round themselves. How big the elephants are, observe Armand
at length. Yes, and also the giraffes. The monkeys are amusings. Oh yes, on a fair, and
there is a fox. Foxes are naughties. You wonder if it was Noel Cowder who wrote the dialogue.
It's so nervously brilliant, my my dear how long can it be before
papa do Armand
but it's not to be, they pass the loops
and the lines but naught happen
except that papa observes that the sky
is blue, although it is sometimes grey
they go out of the turnstile and
return home, next week
we will go to La Campagne, say papa
now you can see what
has been going on.
The zoo and the Bordeaux-la-Mer are too crowded.
Get Armand by himself in the meadow, and it is money for jam.
Money for jam.
Money for jam.
And there's a fantastic illustration of the enormous backside of an elephant,
and then Armand, who's the wettest weed in the history of wet weeds,
gazing at it and observing how big it is.
Oh God, I mean, I just remember weeping
at that.
So Martin was telling us
that
Molesworth starts off as a
punch column, no
Searle involved in the late 30s and early
40s. And following
the success of St Trinian's Willans
or Willans agent approaches Searle to say well I've got this material and you you you're the
best-selling author of the St Trinian's maybe we could get together and initially Searle's response
was well no I don't want to do more school. And he said that as soon as he started reading it, he could see all the space in it.
He thought it was funny, but he could also see what he could bring.
So I want to have these books originally published with their subtitles, because the subtitles are exquisite in their own right.
So The Complete Molesworth is made up of four books the first in 1953 down with school exclamation mark a guide to school life for
tiny pupils and their parents followed in 1954 by how to be top a guide to success for tiny pupils
including all there is to know about space. So that's like
moving into the space race, isn't it?
1956, Whiz for Atoms,
a guide to survival in the
20th century for fellow pupils,
their doting maters, pompous paters,
and any others who are interested.
So that's the...
And then
the complete
Molesworth is published before Back in the Jug Again, which is the final book.
And as far as I can work out, what happens is they have The Complete Molesworth ready for publication,
and Geoffrey Willans dies of a heart attack in early 1958.
And they go ahead with the publication of The Complete Molesworth containing parts of Back in the Jug Again
and then Back in the Jug Again is published with additional material
which all then gets folded into later editions of the complete Molesworth.
So when we listeners say the complete Molesworth,
we don't mean the 1958 shorter version,
we mean the complete Molesworth, not the C-O-M-P-L-E-T Molesworth.
I think any fool knows that, actually.
Martin, the language.
I'm going to ask you actually about Willan's language.
It struck me that the text is funny, but it's not just funny.
It's misspelt in a way which doesn't really come across when we read it out loud.
But actually, when you see it on the page, it's almost like a compliment to the cartoons.
Well, exactly.
I mean, it is a perfect marriage of text and image, weirdly, because most cartoons are a battle between text and image.
But this is a perfect marriage. I remember reading a Molesworth book in a, you know,
it's raining outside, read a book, boys. And I had two books to read. One of them was a Molesworth
book and the other one was 1984. I think I was about 12 at the time. And my English teacher,
who was a very inspirational teacher in many ways,
but he thought I should read the Orwell because he was worried that my spelling was so bad
that it would just be made worse by reading the Muldoon.
So he wanted to corrupt my mind with this horror story about Stalinism instead,
which, you know, good for him.
this horror story about Stalinism instead, which, you know, good for him.
They are actually both
I think
equals 1984 and the
Molesworth Tetralogy
in many ways. They're about horror but
dealt with in different ways.
But you're absolutely right.
It's part of the joy
of reading it and it's actually about
literature because, as you say, you can't read it out loud
and get
the stuff inside. it's almost like
the typographical conceits
of Tristram Shandy
I absolutely agree
I absolutely agree
it's the way the words work
on the page a huge part of the charm
I mean you know it's
Clockwork Orange or Ridley Walker
or God knows Finnegan's wake you
know you you can't you can't fully get the the the effect they're not normal misspellings i mean he
he can spell quite complicated words perfectly well nobody actually spells no as in i know
something k-n-o with nothing on the end of it, or happy with only one P. None of these are normal spellings.
Or say with no Y.
Or say with no Y.
They're part of Nigel's shorthand as he views the world.
I feel they're just a way of him writing quickly the deep thoughts
that he tends to have quite a lot.
Yeah.
John, say a bit about Fotherington Thomas.
Apart from the fact that he obviously ended up in a prog rock band
after school i mean genesis he was in genesis i'm going to quote fotherington thomas here for
probably many of our listeners this will chime with them i simply don't care a row of buttons
whether it was a goal or not nature alone is beautiful that's it and to which Molesworth appends, I do not think he will catch the selector's eye.
Yes.
One of the problems with the book, right,
is you just give up underlining.
Because it's just so full of gems like that.
Deep dislike, the nature walk, the deep dislike,
any excuse to go off for a fag and to to and to impugn the the kind of the the the
the botany teachers there's a there's a bit in whiz for atoms i'm just going to read this little
bit this is about the relationship between fotheringston thomas and molesworth it's one
of my favorite favorite bits of the whole thing when molesworth is reading a crystal ball
and he looks into the what's the future going to be for grabber the head boy.
And what's the future going to be for Fotherington Thomas,
the eye of the prophet Molesworth next light upon dear little Fotherington
Thomas.
What does the crystal ball reveal for this girly?
Can it be true?
Air vice-marshal,
Sir Basil Fotherington Thomas,
BC DSO clubs, spac spacemans oval teenies air vice-marshal
sir basil fotherington thomas lowered himself into the cockpit of the gleaming space jet
complete with all parts two million quid and so so molesworth looks into the future and he sees Fotherington Thomas's obituary.
Obituary by a pal.
All those who knew Basil Fotherington Thomas will mourn the death of a very brave space pioneer.
Oh, goody, say Fotherington Thomas, peeping over my shoulder.
Oh, goody, Molesworth, you have put me in and made me brave.
How can I thank you enough?
I'm brave.
I'm brave.
Hurrah. I should not thank you enough? I'm brave. I'm brave. Hurrah!
I should not count on it, I say.
It is only a flight of fancy.
Thanks all the same.
You are super, Molesworth One.
You really are.
Now, what is your future?
Who, me?
Oh, I say, gosh, no.
Fearfully, I put my great nose towards the crystal ball, dot, dot, dot.
Another splendid creation by Nigel is this daring cocktail frock in burnt orange and
squashed muskrats.
Note how Nigel has modelled bodice and waist in crushed chipmunk and a flaring skirt with
matching beads.
No wonder that Nigel's beeline is the sensation of the season.
Nigel has flare!
Curses! I take the wretched crystal pill and punt it out of the season. Nigel has flair! Curses!
I take the wretched crystal pill
and punt it out of the window.
It takes few things to drive me back
to the imperfect sub-junk of avoir,
but this is one of them.
I mean, it's beautiful, right?
Brilliant.
So beautiful.
Martin, have you got a passage
that you wanted to share with us?
Yes, I have.
Which, just to show how the empire of Molesworth spreads into every corner of life,
I read this at my old school friend John Lewin's funeral.
He rather tragically died at the age of 41 of a brain tumour.
But I'd been to see him in hospital and I used to read to him
when he was in hospital and I'd read this
to him and it made him laugh, which
it was meant to, because it
is very funny. And then his widow asked
me to read it again at his funeral
but it made people laugh again.
And it's Grimes,
the headmaster Grimes,
who is of course an echo of Evelyn Waugh from Decline and Fall.
And it's the first assembly of term.
And it's, remember this, he leer, you never had it so good.
Well, this is just what we expect.
We have it every term and our tiny hearts sink to our boots.
It will be nothing but lat, fr, arith, geom, algy, geog, ect.
And with the winter coming on, it will be warmer in Siberia and a salt mine.
Oh well, we wait for what we know will come next.
And what, say Grimes, have we all been reading in the holes?
Tremble, tremble, moan, drone.
I have read nothing but Red the Redskin
and Guide to the Pools.
I have also sat with my mouth open
looking at Lassie, Wonder Horse, etc. on TV.
How to escape?
But I have made a plan.
Fotherington Thomas, say Grimes,
what have you read?
Ivanhoe, the Vicar of Wakefield,
Wuthering Heights, Treasure Island,
Vanity Fair,
Westwoodhoe and Waterbabies and...
That is enough, good boy.
And Molesworth?
He grinned horribly.
What have you read, Molesworth?
Gulp, gulp, a rat in a trap.
Proust, sir.
Come again?
Proust, sir.
A great writer.
The book in question was Swan's Way.
God blithe me. what did you think of it
eh the style is exquisite sir and the characterization superb the long evocative
passage silence thunder grimes there is no such book impertinent boy i shall have to teach you
culture the hard way report for the cane after prayers cheers cheers to think i have learned
that all by heart it's not fair they get you every way
they get you every way yeah okay so uh something to bear in mind is that they they're actually
there's a film uh there's an animated film coming of molesworth and um matt lucas is doing the voice
of nigel molesworth and i noticed in the press release for this thing because i haven't finished
it yet they're filming at the moment um that jeffrey willans isn't mentioned anywhere on the press
release uh it's very much martin about you know um the director is saying well searle authorized me
to to uh make a a movie of his creations and which seems a bit you know off it certainly is in the cell didn't to be fair to
sell he didn't really take credit for um no i mean for it is um yeah williams presumably is
still in copyright so his estate will have something to say about that i would have thought
well let's let's hope we've alerted them today to that. Happy birthday, Backlisted.
Martin, why should people read Molesworth now in 2020?
Well, just because it's incredibly funny and it's about the universal human condition
where we are struggling with self-deprecating wit and humour
against the monstrosity of oppression all around us.
I mean, it's as simple as that.
That's what it's about.
It's actually getting the last laugh
because it is incredibly funny.
But also, I read it almost 20 years
after it was first published
and it was still resonating then
and I'm sure it is still resonating now.
And so there are generation after generation
after generation of people
for whom this means something
just in the same way as Winnie the Pooh does
and all that stuff.
In fact, I based my my uh characterization of uh david cameron on basil fotherington thomas uh he was part little lord fauntleroy and part and the first
tory conference he did when he was leader i I had him skipping on stage going, hello trees, hello clouds, while the Tory faithful are thinking, string them up,
set it off, string them up, set it off, string them up, set it off.
And wondering how this would turn out. He had sort of two kittens next to him.
But I just wanted to digress briefly about, I had a sudden moment of insight yesterday,
digress briefly about i had a sudden moment of insight yesterday very much with molesworth and fotherington thomas on the mind um about our current prime minister who i assume when this
goes out will still be our prime minister boris johnson who obviously likes to think of himself
as um a kind of molesworth character he uses right coinages like girly swat and things like that. But I realize he isn't.
He isn't.
He is, in fact, Father Innocent Thomas.
Because somebody told me where the new book about him,
his mother says where he got this whole idea about the world king,
that he wanted to be world king to stop the screaming in his head,
his father hitting his mother,
all the other madnesses inside the head of Boris Johnson.
And he got the idea of world king from the Trigyn Empire,
the Trigyn Empire possibly, which of course was a science fiction strip
that appeared in the back of Look and Learn.
Now for the uninitiated, Look and Learn used to have double page spreads
of a nuclear reactor with a double deck of bus
for scale and it was solely for girly swats it was only girly swats would read look and learn
therefore boris johnson is fotherington thomas an utter wet and a weed and a girly swat QED. Very good.
Very good.
Lissa, I was going to ask you for another reading,
but I think you've got something special you could read.
I have.
In 1986, there was a new statesman competition
in which you had to write a love letter
between poorly matched fictional characters.
I'm going to read my winning entry.
You have to imagine the spelling dear madam bovary i take my humble pen in hand to express my great regard and invite you
to my present dwelling visit custer's cheese cheese surrounded as i am by masters prunes and
gerunds your impressive beauty and commander the fruit subjunctive would add a certain junisei koi grammar to my bleak dorm also peas and say to tell you there is a piano on which
you can tinkle extensive grounds to blub in and 300 boys starved of cultural contact
your passionate hem hem admirer nigel molesworth-esque p.s could you bring some of your
arsenic as fotherington th Thomas is particularly troublesome at the moment?
Brilliant.
Can I just add one thing about the pictures?
It needs to be said.
The only time I ever met Quentin Blake
when we were doing a thing at the British Library,
and we agreed that at the beginning of Down With School,
the St Custard's Camera Club,
school dog thinking is the finest English drawing of the 20th century.
Oh, yes, yes, absolutely.
There it is.
His dogs were like nobody else's dogs.
They're not cuddly.
They're not warm.
They're, what are they they're
dogs it's extraordinary it captures the dogginess of the dog anyway that's not me saying that that
is um that is quentin blake oh fie lo egad and away for it is the bell and it tolleth for us uh so super thanks to martin
and lissa for being top guests and to nikki and her high frequency radio set on a wavelength so high that no beat
can hear and Unbound our very own St Custards cheers cheers cheers you can download all 124
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Ah, and here are some more of our great lock-listener chums.
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Hemsley, that's good.
Hem Hemsley.
And we'd also like to say, do you want to give out a birthday message, Mitchinson?
Well, I think we should say thank you to everybody over the last five years, all of those people
who've contributed to the, what did you say, almost 2 million downloads and listens that we've had.
And particularly for all of the patrons, all the people who've supported us over the last year through lockdown and hopefully out the other side.
It's been, yeah, it's become something
that Andy and I could never have imagined
all those years ago,
back when Justin Trudeau, I think,
had just been made president of Canada.
And yes, Hunger Games was just in the cinemas five years ago.
Yes, that was a fiction, wasn't it? The Hunger Games, not in the cinemas five years ago yes that was a fiction wasn't it
the Hunger Games
not a very real prospect
Obama was still president
so
thank you
thank you
and thank you
to all our guests
over the last five years
yes
who've appeared
who
I would
I would emphasise this
they choose the books
they do
so
when you suggest a book
which is fine
you can do that but actually our guests usually choose the books they do so uh when you suggest a book which is fine you can do that but
actually um our guests usually choose the books and we'd especially like to thank our guests
today uh martin rosen and uh the original guest uh lissa evans
guest number one they'll never take that away from you, Lisa. So thanks very much, everybody.
See you next time.
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