Bad Friends - Keep Sketch Away From Loop Loop

Episode Date: September 23, 2024

Get MORE Bad Friends at our Patreon!! https://www.patreon.com/badfriends Thank you to our Sponsors: Pretty Litter, Hello Fresh, BLUECHEW, Adam & Eve & Rocket Money • Pretty Litter: Get 20% your first order at https://www.prettylitter.com/bafriends CODE: BADFRIENDS • HelloFresh: Go to https://www.HelloFresh.com/badfriendsapps for free appetizers for life! • Adam & Eve: Get 50% off and free shipping at https://www.adameve.com CODE: BADFRIENDS • Rocket Money: Stop wasting money on things you don't use. Go to https://rocketmoney.com/badfriends YouTube Subscribe: http://bit.ly/BadFriendsYouTube Merch: http://badfriendsmerch.com 0:00 Sketch Has Bobby's Eyes 5:00 Alfred from Batman Gets Freaky 10:00 A Meet-Cute w/ Loop Loop 17:00 Sketch for President 2024 25:00 Docking and Sumo Wrestling 30:00 Twitch Streaming 36:00 Sketch in Japan 40:00 Lovers in the Dark 45:00 Bobby's Blind Friend 52:00 Sketch's DMs 1:00:00 The Lee Dynasty 1:05:00 Pet Problems & Painted Donkeys 1:10:00 Bobby's New Diet More Bobby Lee TigerBelly: https://www.youtube.com/tigerbelly Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bobbyleelive Twitter: https://twitter.com/bobbyleelive Tickets: https://bobbylee.live More Andrew Santino Whiskey Ginger: https://www.youtube.com/andrewsantinowhiskeyginger Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino Twitter: https://Twitter.com/cheetosantino Tickets: http://www.andrewsantino.com More Juicy Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jetskijohnson/?hl=en More Fancy SOS VHS: https://www.youtube.com/@SOSVHS Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fancyb.1 More Bad Friends iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bad-friends/id1496265971 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/badfriendspod/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/badfriends_pod Official Website: http://badfriendspod.com/ Opening Credits and Branding: https://www.instagram.com/joseph_faria & https://www.instagram.com/jenna_sunday Credit Sequence Music: http://bit.ly/RocomMusic // https://www.instagram.com/rocom Character Design: https://www.instagram.com/jeffreymyles Bad Friends Mosaic Sign: https://www.instagram.com/tedmunzmosaicart Produced by: 7EQUIS https://www.7equis.com/ Podcast Producer: Andrés Rosende This episode contains paid promotion. #bobbylee #andrewsantino #badfriends #sponsored #ads Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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You two are bad friends! Who are these two idiots? White dude and Asian dude. You two are disgusting. Are you two or something? We're bad friends! I love you just the way you are! Well, I'll go do it again. I love you just the way you are. Well, I'll do it again.

I love you just the way you are. I love you just the way you are. You now remember this guy? Yeah, did he sing for the Doobie Brothers? Mm-mm, he was a solo artist. What's his name? Aaron Neville. Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.

Oh, he's black. Yeah, black. Yeah, he wears Chelsea jerseys too. That's exactly right. Right. So we got a guest in today, ladies and gentlemen, Sketch. Sketch, Kyle, right? Kyle?

Sketch is here, baby. Kylie, yes sir. Kylie. Thanks for having me. Hey, Sketch. Thank you. He just learned about, there it is. What's up, brother?

Hey, it's the worst turn to do a meme, unintentional meme. It's incredible, what do you mean? You had pro athletes doing it. What's up, brother? Yeah, desk pop, there. Yeah, do it, dude, unintentional meme. It's incredible. What do you mean you had pro athletes doing it? What's up, brother? Yeah, desk pop there. Yeah, dude, dude, dude, you do it. What's up, brother? What's up, brother?

God, it's gonna love it. I love it so much. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Give me a little exit there. And I mean, how did that become a viral thing? I was just playing with my buddy and we were having like golf. I just don't know.

I've tried to think of catchphrases and What's Up Brother just kind of flew by in my mind. It wasn't even like, it was not even funny or anything too. It's more of like, I just threw up a finger and then it turned into like an inside joke. No, it's incredible. Well, he's trying to get a catchphrase. Can you make up one for him?

Cause you were good enough to make up that phrase. How about this, how about keep it loose lady? No. No? No. Keep it loose lady. Keep it loose lady and you do a little hole like this? I liked it.

Yeah. Keep it loose lady. Yeah, keep it loose lady. a little hole like this? I liked it. Yeah. Keep it loose lady. Yeah, keep it loose lady. Maybe city chicken or something? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ooh, city chicken. What? City chicken.

City chicken what? Your catchphrase could be city chicken. City, well yeah, what's the hand gesture? Double C. Oh, whoa. Double C, just like the Crips. Yeah, yeah. You already got a lot of them.

I think it needs a third thing. I'll throw in an accent on that. Oh, all right, so what, was it city chicken? City chicken.ps? Yeah, yeah. You already got a lot of them. I think I need the third thing. I'll throw in an accent on that. Oh, so what, was it City Chicken? City Chicken. No, no, no. No. How about City's Chicken F***? No.

No, no. Jesus Christ, Bob. Are they having too big there or something? What is this? Orange. Orange Chicken. Unbelievable. Friendly Fire.

What? Friendly Fire. Orange Chicken, that's mine. Orange Chicken, all right, yeah. You're City Chicken, I'm Orange Chicken. Well, are there other catchphrases that you're known for, is that it? There's other things I'm known for, but not catchphrases.

All right. What, no, you're video gaming. Yeah. Yeah, that. Well, this is what's interesting. Bobby is old. Okay. And loves video games. I love video games.

And you're young and you love video games. This is the meeting of the worlds, except he's more into sports gaming and you're more into- Cozy. Cozy gaming. Yeah, yeah. You know about cozy gaming?

What's cozy gaming? Well, you've never heard of cozy gaming, bro? You play like half naked or something? Yeah. No, no, cozy games are like Stardew Valley farming simulation, like just cozy. Oh, like farming simulator. Yeah, relaxing games.

He likes, he likes- Why are you squinting like that? He likes- Oh, I just get like, I get fog in my eyes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, but that's He likes he likes love you squinting like that. He'd look I just get like bad like I get fogged Yeah, yeah, yeah, but that's the look that you do when you take a yeah, it is Yeah, so what do you look like when you take a that or even worse? I usually kind of put both my feet up on a seat. Yeah, let me let me see. Let me see your face That's very nice you guys both you have both the same eyes you do know

I don't know if it's Asian or Down syndrome. No yours. have, you have both the same eyes. You do know that, right? Yeah, yeah. You mocking her squinting. I don't know if it's Asian or Down syndrome. Yours? Yeah, what are we both doing? I don't know. Is it Asian or Down syndrome? It's a little bit of both. Hey.

Yeah. It's a little bit of both for you. Yeah, yeah. But no, he's into cozy gaming. He likes, Bob likes low stakes, long term, like long play games. He likes marathon games, where it takes you months and months. Where you grind.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Oh, I liked that. You like grinding? Grinding? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, sometimes. Sometimes.

Like you talk about like, getting on someone or something? Yeah. What did he say? Getting on somebody. No, that's not what I mean. No, he means putting in the work. Putting in the work, yeah.

Like, you know, like collecting mushrooms or whatever it might be. You collect mushrooms? Stop, stop. Putting in the work. Like, you know, like collecting mushrooms or whatever it might be. You collect mushrooms? Stop, stop. Not in my real life. You think like I go on and get Hortiballon mushrooms in the forest? That does sound good.

It sounds like you eat a real- That does sound really good. No, no, like in some games like in Skyrim, like there's a, are you okay? I'm good. Lean back. Can you hear me? Can you hear me? I'm sorry. Why are you- Am I being too aggressive hear me? Can you hear me? I'm sorry. Am I being too aggressive?

Yeah, what are you doing? I'm sorry, dude. Welcome, welcome. Hey, this is Asian on Asian crime here. Yeah. Wow. So you're a quarter, is there a percentage of you that's Asian?

No, people think I'm Asian. Yeah, yeah. I'm more like Hispanic. Oh, you're more like Hispanic. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. You say you're more like Hispanic or you are more Hispanic? I more emulate Hispanics.

Ah. Are you a full white though? Pretty much. Yeah. Do you have you done your 23andMe or whatever? No, I haven't. I need to. Wait, wait.

I'm a little, I mean, like I'm a little darker. I don't think so. Yeah. You don't think so? I think you look, you're just white with a little bit of tan. That's true. Yeah, white with tan. Yeah.

I've been outside a lot. No, you're white. I don't see the tan. You don't see his tan at all? No. Yeah, he's a little tan, yeah. I've been outside a lot. No, you're white. I don't see the tan. You don't see his tan at all? No. Yeah, he's a little tan. Well, I have to know what he looks like in the winter.

Oh, right. I don't know winter, Kyle. Right. What are your colors? What are your colors in the winter? My colors in the winter? Yeah. I can get pretty white.

Okay, good. Yeah, okay, good. It's pretty... Yeah, do you ever tan your nuts? Tan my nuts. Yeah, yeah. No? Okay.

Do other things with them. Should I try? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, wait, wait, stop. This is the shit I want to get into. He loves this, yeah. No? Okay. Do other things with them. Should I try? Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, wait, wait, stop. This is the shit I want to get into. He loves this, yeah. Tippy tap. That's it.

You tippy tap your nuts. Little nut play. Throw them to each side of the leg? Yeah. Is it your own nuts or somebody else's? That's what happens when, if you cozy game, like if you're playing with your pants off or something, your nuts start to get stuck to your side of your thigh. Yep.

Throw them to each side. Yep. We used to call that the bat wing. The bat wing. Yeah, if your nut gets stuck to your thigh and you spread it, it looks like a bat wing. You never done that? You never done that? The flying squirrel?

It's called a bat cave when you get it stuck to your gooch. That's true. That's a little bat cave. And that's something, write that down. That's something I'm learning now. Thank you so much. I like that. Bat cave, thank you so much.

And when it gets stuck under there, you can yell Alfred and it'll unhang. Oh, the butler or whatever his name is. Yes, well the wienerler. Did he. Oh, the butler or whatever his name is. Yes, well, the wienerler. Yeah, but yeah. Did he get pussy at butler? Did Alfred ever get pussy in the game, in the movies?

You know what the problem is? What? Bruce Wayne kept him so away from everything. You know Alfred didn't have time to get ass. But one time he did. When? In what movie? I'll tell you what movie.

When did he get ass? I'll tell you where he got ass. He got ass in the dark night. When? I'll tell you when, dude.. He got ass in the dark night When I'll tell you when dude, will you just let me fucking talk dude? I don't like being rushed by you What are you rushing me today, dude? All right, sorry my bad. That was my thank you That was my aggression. So go ahead. I apologize. When does it happen? Well, remember the that Russian ballerina thing They closed that down. Uh-huh, right, and then, you know what I mean? Then they got a yacht. Right.

And then remember Christian Bale jumped off the yacht because he was gonna get on a plane. I remember. To capture the Ching Chong guy. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't know his name. Chin Han. Chin Han.

That's my friend, the actor, Chin Han. Right. And Alfred was on the boat with these ballerinas, so we don't know what happened there. Oh, the assumption is he got to pick whoever he wanted. Well, I mean, what? Probably the Deshaun Watson treatment. Oh, Bobby doesn't know who that is.

No, but I like it. But I do get the reference and he doesn't. Yeah, well, tell me the reference. It's like a pretty much a happy ending massage, except with a little more stretching. Whoa. So you're getting massage, getting happy, and then while you're doing yoga? Yes.

Or Pilates. It's a surprise to the other person. It's a surprise to the other person. Not good. It's like a surprise for you. So if you and I were stretching, let's say you and I did hot yoga. Okay. Can you see that happening in a... Yeah. Can you see us doing hot yoga together? I can. All right. I envision we're in Hawaii. Could I know a couple of... Or Thailand or something like that?

Oh, you want to go to... Oh, we to go to Thailand, right? The motherland? What you think I'm high? You think I'm high? I'm guessing no, you're not. No, you're right. Well, guess what I am. What it Where's Bangkok? Okay, yeah, yeah, no, I'm not is that your last guess or you wouldn't um Let me think about all of them. Yeah, yeah, yeah, we'll just look Korea yes Wow

So good right on the money right so we're doing hot We're doing hot yoga in Thailand right and we're stretching and then I walk up to you and I just start like putting my hands on your genitals. Is that what you mean by the Deshaun Lewis? Yeah, the Deshaun Lewis. That's what he's talking about. Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay. That's what he's talking about. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Is it Deshaun Lewis? What's his name? Sean Watson. Exactly. Have you ever had a happy ending? I've done it to myself many times. Have you ever had a happy ending? I've been to Vegas.

Yeah. Okay, good. That sounds good. I mean, have you gotten a hand job? How old are you by the way? 25. You're 25. 25. So I assume you've had a hand job before. Yes, sir.

They're the worst. Yeah. Do you like them or no? They're pretty, I don't prefer them. Yeah. Let's get to the other parts. Yeah. Oh, what are the other parts? I don't know from your part of this country. I don't know. It could be different. Oh, this.

Yeah. Head and shoulders. I don't know, but yes. Second base. Second base. Head and shoulders. Do you like sucking on titty or what? I do. You're a butt guy or you're a titty guy? Hey, I love fucking titties. Knew it. I knew you were one of us. The American way.

Look at that. I knew it, God is good, God bless America. Sometimes, hard times. It's the greatest country in the world. It's the best country in the world. You know you can't do that in any other country. You can't titty fuck overseas. I know.

They shun it. Well, in Asia, their titties are so small, it's very difficult. Yeah, two small things don't do. Yeah, you're just doing chest bone fucking. What? You know what I mean? They have these hard chest bone Korean legs

and you just got to rub it against the chest bone. But that is, you know, that is how they make- Fire. Wasabi. Oh, and wasabi. Fucking a pigeon chest. What? Like fucking a pigeon chest.

Very good. True. Yeah, I like, whoa, dude, I pigeon chest. Very good. True. Yeah. I like it. Whoa, dude. I like that. Broad shoulder. Are you seeing somebody now, Kyle? Um, seeing someone? No, not specifically. Okay. I'm kind of just doing tryouts. Oh, you got tryouts. Oh, I like that. So when you go out on a date, let's say I'm a girl. Can we pretend? Yes, sir.

Yeah. My name is Loop Loop. Oh, I love her. My name is Loop Loop. Oh, I love her. This is my favorite character. I've never made it. I love Loop Loop. Yeah, I'm Loop Loop. Yeah?

No, no, no. What are you doing? That's your Italian accent. Yeah, that's my Italian, yeah, yeah. All right, I'm Loop Loop. Perfect. Hi. What's up, brother?

Hey, hey, sister. Very good already. You're already sucking his dick. Where are we going? Where are we going? Yeah. Hey, let's just go straight to the crib. Whoa. Yeah, but it's 6 PM.

I haven't eaten. I thought we were going to have dinner. OK, sushi. OK, where, brother? Thailand. We're going to go to Thailand? Whoa. Whoa.

This guy's going to fly you to Thailand? So now we're on a plane. That's probably the easiest way to get the play there Whoa? You're gonna fly all the way to Thailand to get sushi Possibly you don't know any sushi places in LA or Texas. Oh, okay fine. We're going to go We're going to get some chicken or something. Oh What was a downgrade yeah, yeah sushi sushi to chicken. We went from sushi to chicken already.

The way you're dressed, you look like you'd probably give it up pretty easy. Whoa. Whoa. Wait, you're saying that I'm fat? No, I, no, it's, no, it's the small hands inside. Oh, I have a little tight dainty hand. No, I'm just kidding.

Okay. Okay, anyway, so what chicken place are, what's my name? Lupu? Lup, Lup Lup. Lup Lup. Yeah, yeah, it's loop-loop. Don't forget it, mister. Yes, sir.

So what chicken place are we going to? City Chicken. Oh, City Chicken. Is it good? Is it good? City Chicken. City Chicken, activate. Mm-hmm.

Whoa. One of the best spots in LA. Really good. So we go to City Chicken, and then what, and then are we getting dessert, or are we going back to your crib? Back to the crib. Okay.

I don't go on many dates. I usually just- I know that's what we're acting it out. I'm trying to help you. Hopefully. I'm trying to fucking help you. Okay. This guy's the dating guru.

I'm the dating fucking guru, dude. I'm trying to fuck. Let's get this show on air. I know, but you can't go right the fuck, dude. Hey. Yeah, yeah. I think you can. All right, so we're at your crib now.

We're at your crib, right? Nice plays. Excuse me? Why are you squinting? I'm trying to zoom in right now. Oh, you're zooming in. Wait, for you to get long sight, you have to zoom in? These, when they gave me these,

they gave me two different sides and two different strengths. Yeah. Like I didn't like that. So it's just like, I can't really see that great, but I just didn't feel like going back. He's zooming in. Oh, you're zooming in. Zooming in.

And then you know what? I'm gonna zoom into you too. Whoa. That's hot. I thought you were already zoomed in. I'm zooming in. Do I zoom? I'm so sorry.

I got COVID. Sorry I'm coughing, I have COVID. Hey look, that's the origin. Well, oh, wow. Loop loop. Wait, you think I'm from Wuhan, China? A little bit of bat soup. Maybe take loo poo for some soup. Turning very QAnon and fucking racist.

Hey, whoa! Whoa! Anyway, so we're watching, we wanna watch a movie cuddled up on the couch? Sure. What do you wanna watch? What do I wanna watch? Excuse me?

I thought we were gonna fuck, what are you? I don't have any questions. Okay, you just wanna fuck? All right, so I didn't bring any condoms, do you have any? No sir, no ma'am. No, no. No loop-loop. No loop-loop.

Oh, you just want a raw dog it? Sure. Well, he didn't even think about it. Yeah, sure. He went straight away. Wow, so that's your style. I've already got my booster and all that stuff, I'm good. Oh, you're vaccinated?

Yes, sir. Oh, that's cool. Yes, ma'am. Wow, and who are these homies you're with? These guys? Yeah. That's my brother. The black guy's your brother.

That's my manager and my camera guy. Oh, that's cool, dude. Not that camera guy, the new camera guy. The new camera guy. The new camera guy. The new camera guy. Do you have any questions for my little friend? I'm really loving Loop Loop. I gotta tell you, I'm losing my shit over here with her.

Yeah, yeah, well you love Loop Loop? I love Loop Loop. It's a pretty good character, right? It's a great character, thank you so much. So you're single though, Sketch, huh? Yes, sir. You're running around having a good time? Actively, actively in play.

Oh, good for you. Wow. Well, you're not on the apps though. Not really. Can't use them. Can't really. Too famous? No, just not enough on the apps though. Not really. Can't use them. Can't really. Too famous? No, just not enough good pics.

Oh. Kinda gotta show up in person. Wait, now do you get your girls from DMs? DMs and mostly just go to parties or just go out. Oh, a party. No, not that. Diddy party. Please don't go to those.

Hey, no party like a sketch party. Are you throwing parties at your house? No, so like I live with banks right now. And I mean, I just go, I'll go places sometimes. But mostly like just out, like, I don't know, I'm trying to think of, I usually just get addresses from people. Could you? Whether it's a place or like a restaurant or something. Yeah, yeah. Good for you. Will you get addresses? I don't it's a place or like a restaurant or something. Yeah, yeah.

Good for you. When you get addresses, I don't, can you explain? He's young and successful and they tell him where to go. They say, come here, come party here. Go there, go party there. And then when you party, do you drink? I drink, smoke a little bit. Mostly smoke.

Some weed? Weed, yeah. Yeah, yeah. You do Molly? Oh, no. Okay. Have never. Never have.

Ooh, interested? Have you taken Molly? Oh yeah, yeah. What's it do? What's it like? Oh no. Some guy. Have never. Never have. Ooh, interested? Have you taken Molly? Oh yeah, yeah. What's it do? What's it like? Feels good. Put you back in that loop loop scenario. Hey.

Hey. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My wiener's tingling. Nice. Nice. What's up, brother? I think that's another maybe catchphrase. My wiener's tingling.

My wiener's tingling. Wow, that's a good one. You gotta add like a, would you add a hands on with it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That doubles the chances of it. Oh. You gotta put an emote with what you're saying.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Does your penis tingle often? No, but it does burn sometimes. Okay, uh-oh. Yeah. Uh-oh, hot dog. That's... Do you know that's his catchphrase?

Not because I have one kidney, so sometimes it just comes out like pretty, piss will come out pretty orange or something like that. What happened to the other one? Born with one. You're only born with one? Born with one. I think someone probably harvested it.

Somebody took it. Where were you born? I was born in Arizona. Oh yeah, they take it out there. Yeah, that's where they take it. Phoenix? Phoenix. Wow. But you live in Texas now. Yes, sir. Yeah, yeah. What city? I live in Arizona. Oh yeah, they take it out there. Yeah, that's where they take it. Phoenix? Phoenix. Wow.

But you live in Texas now? Yes, sir. Yeah, yeah. What city? I live in Houston. Oh, it's a good city. The big H. We love the big H.

I love living in Houston. Would you ever move to California? You like it out here or no? I like it out here for like purposes like this, but besides that, I like living in Houston. I've lived there my whole life. So I just, it's just kind of the vibe. That's where all your people are.

Yes, sir. Yeah, I get that. How are you handling so I just, that's just kind of the vibe. Yeah. That's where all your people are. Yes, sir. Yeah, I get that. How are you handling fame? Pretty, I don't know, I take everything like day at a time. Like it's more like, I don't know, it happened pretty fast. I never thought I'd like, I don't really prepare to be on camera or stuff like that. Like it's pretty fun, but like-

You seem very comfortable here. Yeah, like, I mean like, I mean like just like cameras and stuff, like always, I was never like, I meant like, just like cameras and stuff, like always, I was never like, I would never like public speaking or anything like that. Well, we never learned public speaking, we just do it. Yeah, we did. Yeah, we did.

But I bet you, but a babe, but guy, I bet you can do all kinds of public speaking. Yeah. If you'd like to do a little test here. Do a little. Let's do a Ted talk. Do a presidential debate. Oh, would you like to do a presidential,

with President Carver here? Okay. And I'll be the CNN moderator. Alright. Alright. Okay, so um. Well, unlike my opponent. Well, I like, I like.

Excuse me, sir. Yeah? We just started. Oh, okay. And I have to do the introduction. Oh, sorry. So welcome to CNN. I'm Sally Stevens and I'm the moderator today and welcome.

And today is the Democratic nominee, President Carver. Right? Hello. And we have the Republican nominee, President... What's your last name? Cox. Cox. Cox. Anyway, let's get the, let's get the, It is. Let's get the, I know it is.

Let's get the debate on the road, okay? So about immigration, what is your stance, President Carver? Well, loop, loop, I'm glad you asked. Fuck. Unlike my opponent, I like people of all color. My opponent has said often that he does not like minorities. It's kind of the stance he takes. It's what he's talked about often.

It's on his shirts, it's on his hats. Yeah. And you know, I'm full in support of it. My opponent is a tiny cuck. He's got a baby dick. Okay. Okay. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

And a little too fast. You know what? What? That gets my vote. That gets my vote. That just got my vote. I just won three states down south, baby. Wow.

Look at that. That's incredible, dude. You should run. I know, I'm thinking about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you're taking fame day to day. And does it ever freak you out a little bit? Oh yeah, I'm like, it's more like I'd wake up and go,

like, it doesn't feel real or something. Well like, when you see pro athletes, when you see pro athletes do What's Up, Brother? Does that fuck with your head? Does that fuck you up a little bit? Turns me on. Hell yeah. No, I'm just kidding.

It's uh, The pro take it rolling. Yeah, no, it's pretty sick. I mean, I never got the whole thing. Like I had, what's up brother? I did one time. So like it turned into like a whole meme and like kind of like, that's all people say to me.

I don't have to say it back to them. You don't have to. So it's like a, oh no, no, no. No, you don't have to say it. You can just let it go. Is it annoying or do you want to? Oh no, I like it. Blessing this guy's.

I just never really got the whole, it's just like, what's up brother? Like, you know what I mean? I thought that was a pretty common. Yeah, but it's your cadence, it's your look, it's just like, what's up, like, you know what I mean? I thought that was a pretty common. Yeah, but it's your cadence, it's your look, it's your style, it's who you are. That's what people got into. They like that, you know, like they like that,

the rhythm of it is good. They like the way you present it. Stole that from DJT. God bless. God bless. They like you. And that's a good thing. That's it, that is good. Yeah, yeah.

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Football's the one. Football is like where my claim is. I played that when I was growing up, did wrestling and stuff like that, but like never really fucked mostly just football though. Football's the one. Football is like where my claim is. I played that when I was growing up, did wrestling and stuff like that, but like never really fucked with it too much. Yeah. You were on the wrestling team? For a little bit, it sucked.

You get your ass kicked a couple of times. I was a chubby 170, so I'd go out there and wrestle like a real 170. Wow. They kind of like throw you around. You know, this guy was an extremely good high school wrestler, so was his brother. Really?

That's true. Yeah. What weight? No, you guessed the weight. Guess the weight. You know, this guy was an extremely good high school wrestler. So was his brother. Really? That's true. Yeah. What weight? No, you guessed the weight. Guess the weight. I thought Sumo was one weight. Bro, very funny.

But I just, you know, because I'm being, I was just- Asian jokes are layups, I'm sorry. Y'all don't fight back. Y'all don't fight back. Well, they can't. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so yeah, I just did collegiate wrestling, not sumo. You did? Yeah, I did, yeah, yeah.

You ever did collegiate wrestling? Well, I did, what high school, whatever high school, was it freestyle at your school or what? Oh yeah, like no, what's the other one? Collegiate, that's what it's called. Regular, where you stand, you know what I mean? I did four years. You did four years, and what weight do you think

I wrestled? You look like you're probably 180 right now. Oh my God. Maybe a little softer. Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. Wait, what do you think you're, wait, you're not 180? No, I am. You put a one in front of it?

How'd you start with a one? Okay, 225. 225, 225. Wow, I gotta get on a Zempik, I think. That's it, that's the final straw. No, it's he- Yeah, dude, dude, that was fucking crazy. You think I came in aggressive?

Right? Sumo and then 280. What the fuck is going on around here, man? Hey, you look like you got soft skin, come on. In a good way, though. In a good way, yeah. I do, I love this guy, dude. I know, he's the best.

Hey, we'll be tip to tip later. Yeah, you will. Wait, whoa, stop. Can we slow down? No. I'm sweating now. Yeah. I'm sweating now.

I see you're drooling a little too. Yeah, I'm drooling too. You mean dock? Space docking? Yeah. Space docking? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You got a sleeve, do you have a sleeve?

Or you clipped? Oh, me? Whatchamacallit. You got a helmet? I took a little off the top at the start. You took a little top? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You got a sleeve, do you have a sleeve? Or are you clipped? Oh, me? Whatchamacallit. You got a helmet? I took a little off the top at the start. It took a little top? Yeah, me too. It's got a little buzz cut.

That's what I told him when I came out. I said a little off the top. Yeah, so we have no way of docking. Yeah. So you're right, it would be tip to tip. Well, it'd be like this, huh? Is, am I the pinky? Oh, you're both pinkies.

You have a nice penis? Check Google. Okay. This guy's fast, dude. This guy's so fast, dude. Check Google. We love you, dude. I love you more.

I want to know about your family. So are your parents proud of you? Yeah, like I have great parents, great family. Blessed with the people I was raised by. Oh, cool dude. All the things after the fact were my own doing. What do you mean after the fact? Well, like up till,

like I mean, they raised you till you're 18 or whatever. So, I mean, like they taught me everything that was right and wrong. And then you did your own thing after that. Yeah, a war of like freestyle. I'm working on it, but like, you know. We're all working on it. Yeah.

Because like, you know, like he's working. We're all working on something. Everyone's working on something. Bobby's sobriety, right? I'm trying to get, stop being so angry all the time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And we're both, we're failing at both. We're failing at both.

What are you getting sober from? Oh, drugs and alcohol, generally. Like what was your drug of choice? Well, over the years it's been different at times, you know? Sometimes it's been alcohol, sometimes it's been just weed, sometimes it's been opiates. Yeah. Crack, one time it was crack. Crack, so now I'm fine, now, you know?

Yeah, my advice is probably weed. Weed. Probably too much weed. All day, every day? Yeah. Yeah. A little bit before here, a little bit when I wake up, and then a little bit before I go to sleep. You ever taken a dab before? Oh yeah.

Oh yeah. Yeah, I couldn't, I spoke Gaelic after I got so fucking high. Unbelievable, man, I hated it. I didn't like it. I don't like to feel that out of control. Too high. That's true. I want to be a little bit high and just coast through the day.

Have you ever taken psychedelics in? Yeah, but it's a different kind of trip. You know, like psychedelics is more involved, it's more peaceful. Dab sits you in the face really hard. I don't like it that hard. Feels like butane going in. I want it slow and low, baby.

That's true. Slow and low. So I'm gonna ask you, you don't have to get, you have to divulge, but I am curious, because your manager is here, and you know what that means. You're making money. Yes, sir. Whenever they come along, you know, they're making good money now. So you means? You're making money. Yes, sir.

Whenever they come along, you know, they're making good money now. So you're making good money, huh? And you got to- Yes, sir. And I don't know where he works, but he's a fancy manager. Fancy manager.

You mean this guy right here? Right there? Yeah, yeah. You like that you like that. He's fancy. He's wearing the same jeans. You work for a company or you're solo? Yeah.

Whoa, see even that fucking response right there. Yeah. Yeah, very fam. Well, I'm gonna ask him because we can hear him on the mic, not him. Okay. You know your attitude today, dude? Just trying to help the whole thing.

I know. You know? My bad. Your manager you met how long ago? January-ish. Right, so this is fresh. Yes, sir. And is it going good?

Is he treating you right? Yeah, great, great guy. And we'll have him killed if he's not, easily. What kind of stuff is he getting you into? Like in terms of like deals or like? Yeah, yeah, great guy. And we'll have him killed if he's not, easily. What kind of stuff is he getting you into? Like in terms of like deals or like? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I signed a couple of deals. Like I got a deal with prize picks.

Oh yeah. Oh yeah. We love prize picks. PA, stuff like that. Awesome. I make most of my money from Twitch though. Yeah, your Twitch streaming is the thing that kind of popped you hard too. Yeah, Twitch pays pretty well and then I do YouTube as well.

What's the game you're playing on Twitch? The game I'm mostly playing on Twitch, I do like IRL stuff more now, but like I play a lot of Madden and stuff like that. Oh, Madden. Yeah. The game and stuff like during the summer, it kind of dies off and IRL kind of takes over. What's IRL? I'm dumb.

In real life. But what is that? What are in real life games? So it's like instead of behind desktop, it's like when you take it and you're free roaming. Like you could be doing anything. But it pretty much means like off a computer. No shit.

So when kids are like, kids are in school, that kind of like the desktop, cause like they'll go to school, go home, and then they'll watch people game. But like during the summer, like a kid would rather play games and watch someone be outside kind of. Like, so it kind of goes through ups and downs of like.

God, that's such an interesting thing, man. I love it. Yeah, it's pretty awesome. People have pitched him because they people want to watch him play. Oh yeah. So you're saying don't do that in the summer. You should.

Well, what I'm going to do, I think people really responded to me starting a farm on Stardew Valley. So I'm going to start a brand new farm and I think I'm responded to me starting a farm on Stardew Valley, so I'm gonna start a brand new farm and I think I'm gonna vlog it. Yeah, you should. That is good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll see what happens, but you ever play Warzone?

Sometimes, not really. I'm just trying to figure out a game where I can play with you. Try Madden. Yeah. I just don't know how it works. That's the only problem. Well, you know football. Yeah, I mean, I think I know how it works. That's the only problem. Well, you know football?

Yeah, I mean, I think I know the scoring system. Wait, is this Lupu, ask me, or? This is Lupu, yeah. Well, Lup Lup and Bobby Lee are similar. They kind of are interchangeable. Yeah, yeah. They're kind of two in the same person? Yeah, you know how sometimes,

well, that's the best. You're wearing a skirt under there? Yeah, that's his Italian gangster, there he is. Oh, yeah. If you wanna go and talk to Vinny, you can talk to Vinny, you know? Yeah, do you wanna talk to Vinny? Who's that?

That's Vinny. Oh, right there? Yeah, I'm like that fucking, what's split? I'm like the movie Split. Right. Yeah, yeah. I knew this, but then I also do loop loop. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. If I captured you, let's say you got knocked out. Just let me just, you got knocked out, right? And you were in a cellar somewhere, you're tied to a fucking pole, metal pole, right? I can see it now. And I'm like split, I come out, right?

No shirt, maybe a Hawaiian shirt, right? And I'm like, hey, how you doing? You know what I mean? And I did these characters, would you be scared? I would be scared up to a certain point. Well, like what level of scared do you think? Oh, I'd probably throw it like mid range. Probably like five.

What? You got like a, you got an intimidating, you can be intimidating. You think I can? I think so. If you dress up or something. Yeah. Maybe put on some-

Don't keep the shirt on. What? What'd you say? Keep the shirt on. Oh, you think it's scarier if my shirt's off? Yeah. You know, it's coming from a guy. Here we go.

I always say, you remember Porgs? Porgs? Yeah. What's a Porg? From Star Wars. Oh, no, no. Oh, you don't remember. Check this out.

There it is. Yeah, that's basically his body. That's him. Yeah. It's impressive. Yeah. It's impressive. It's impressive. Yeah. It's impressive. It's impressive.

I think that was- You know what the fuck a Porg is? A Porg? Yeah. No. You've never seen Star Wars. No, I don't really fuck with sci-fi too much. He likes real life shit.

Yeah, that's true. He's not a nerd. Documentaries. Yeah, but he looks sci-fi. I look sci-fi? You mean he looks? I mean, he looks, dude, I went to fucking Comic-Con, that's what they look like.

He wrote. I'm just whispering, you can't hear this, right? But yeah, doesn't he look, Andrew, back me up here. Doesn't he look like he knows sci-fi or not? Yeah, but you do too. Yeah, and I do. All right. I'm not denying it, he's denying it.

All right, right, right, maybe he doesn't. Yeah, you don't. I don't. Age-wise too. I refuse. 25 is also young for Star Wars. Yeah? Now I'm saying Yeah, you don't. I don't. Age-wise too. I refuse. 25 is also young for Star Wars. Yeah? Now I'm saying like, I don't know if that generation likes Star Wars.

Okay. That's older, we're older. That's older. Well, he's 25, that kid right there is 25. Yeah, but also I didn't watch Star Wars till college, but also like we grew up with like prequels were coming out when we were kids. Yeah, they fucked up the sequence for us.

They did. Oh, they fucked up the sequence. I totally agree. They did. They fucked all that shit up. Yeah. It was better if they left it alone. Oh, they fucked up the scene. I totally agree. They yeah, they fucked all that shit up Yeah, it was better if they left it alone or they just started with Phantom Menace. Is that what you're trying to say? Trash it was trash anyway, so you don't watch any sci-fi. No, not really I mostly just watch YouTube twitch and then like who do you watch on twitch other streamers?

Just trying to see what they're doing. I have no clue really how to stream right now, so it's kind of like- You don't? When I started, I just kind of turned on this thing and I'd play a game, but to build out a stream, you kind of have to have multiple segments. But so you've been so successful at it,

it's funny that you say you don't know really how to do it. It's kind of just been working on its own. Yeah. Well then why fuck with it? It's great. That's true. Right, if it's not broken, why are you trying to fix it? Obviously you've amassed something very popular

and appealing. I think the more people try to fuck with it, the worse it gets. Yeah. Yeah, I think leave it alone. I think you're doing a great job. Yeah, that's what I'm trying to do. Well, it's weird.

Like that old saying, if it's not broke, finish it. If it's not broke. Must be American. Don't fix it. There it is. DJT. Must be American. Don't fix it. There it is. DJT. That's right. Love it.

Or leave it. Love it or leave it. List it? Love it or list it? Is it? Let's leave it. Love it or leave it alone. That's good, yeah.

Test them on the phrases. That's smart. What is that phrase from? What? Is this a sci-fi thing? What, love it or leave it? What, love it or leave it? What is love it or leave it? Is that like a-

I've never even heard of that before. Oh, you just don't- Who the fuck said that? I'm missing it. Wait, who the fuck said love it or leave it? I did. Yeah, where's that from? Life.

Okay. Yeah, love something- What does that mean though? Love it or leave it alone. Right, okay. Do you love me, Lupu? Lupu? Lup, why do you keep calling it Lupu?

Lupu? I mean Lupu, it's Lupu. Lupu? It's Why do you keep calling me Lup-Lup? Lup-Lup? I mean Lup-Lupu, it's Lup-Lup. Lup-Lup? It's two loops. Two loops. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Look at that. Two loops don't make a wrong.

Double loops. Yeah, I just made one up. That's it, I like that. I just made one up. Have you traveled internationally? I've been to Japan. Whoa. Yep.

No, wait, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. He's just saying regionally, he pointed regionally. Yeah, but he went. Well. Like I'm supposed to go, I concur? No, you're supposed to say, you're welcome. Touche? What the fuck is this?

Well, he's thanking you. Okay. Canada? Yeah. Get that. Canada? Thank you. Canada, dude.

Canada. All right, good. Canada. That's the two I've been to. Yeah, yeah. So Canada and Japan. Yeah, and then London. What'd you do in Japan? Yeah. Japan, we just got-

Middle Earth. Middle Earth. Hey, yo. Okay. You look like your head could rotate behind you. What was going on in Japan? What was going on in Japan? We were just, I was there with Faze, and then we just tried to stream in the morning, so

pretty much drank in the morning and then passed out by three. That's what you did every day. Yeah. Pretty on par. How many days? We were there for like a week, probably eight days. Every day you'd wake up and get drunk at whenever you woke up and then you'd go to bed by 3 PM. Every day we'd wake up at 8 30, go to 7 11, probably get some, we'd get a couple of lemon sours. They're like, what is the percentage of a lemon sour over there? Don't know. 11%? 9%? Wow. 9% It's like, what is the percentage of a lemon sour over there? Don't know. 11%, 9%. Wow. 9%.

It's like an IPA. Four of those. Yeah. Feeling good. And just walking? Did you talk to any of the Japanese people? I got a couple of these. Yeah.

Oh, that's like, get the fuck out of here. Is that what it is? Do you not know about this in Japan? What is it? They don't, there's a lot of places that they don't want whites coming around. They don't want tourists coming around. Oh, thank God. They X you out. They tell you, no, thank you. That's, there's a lot of places that they don't want whites coming around. They don't want tourists coming around. Oh, thank God.

They X you out. They tell you, no, thank you. This is a real thing. You gotta be fucking kidding me. They were doing it like, there's one lady that did it like, my hand to God. And I was like going, oh, hey. They'll tell you, no, thank you.

Wait, wait, you gotta be, it's segregation like the fucking 1950s South? That's why Japan is so nice. They really go, get the fuck out of here? Yeah, well, no, they don't say anything. They just tell you no, because what they're trying to communicate is they don't speak English and nobody there does.

They're not going to try to communicate with you. So when you go there, they see, obviously you're a fucking white. Yeah, yeah. And they go, okay, okay, okay. Cause they're saying, no one's going to try to speak English to you. Yeah, yeah.

Can you still go in? No, you would, why would you go past them? Yeah, I would go this back. No. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You do that to me. Yeah, it. Can you still go in? No, you would, why would you go past that? Yeah, I would go this back. No. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you do that to me. Yeah, it's not like- I walk into a, oh no, you. No.

No, you. No. And I walk in there. Well the problem is- And go get me a fucking cabbage stew. Well they'd let you in. Oh yeah. They would assume that you might be able

to finagle your way through. See? Okay. See now he's doing it. Oh no, that's my bread and butter. Yeah. So they do this, that's interesting. They also do a thing called, we call it. Oh no, that's my bread and butter. Yeah. So they do this, that's interesting. They also do a thing called, we call it WPT,

it was white people tax. So you'd have tourists that you'd go to get a bill from a restaurant and there'd be like other tax, tourist taxes included. What does that mean? They have a tourist tax. If you're eating and you're not a fucking local, they tax you on top of what you've already paid.

Wow. So how much money is that? It's another percentage of the bill. Wow. Is it offensive? No. Okay. No, no, no.

What do you mean? How would it be offensive? Would they add more money? Because I'm a tourist. Okay. Yeah, it's tourist tax. I'm trying to squeeze a lemon out of there. That's right.

And get lemonade. That's true. Exactly. Well, they don't serve lemonade over there, but yeah, I do understand. Okay. Lemon sours. What are the percent understand. Okay. Lemon Sours. So what are the percent, excuse me? Lemon Sours.

I'm sorry. I'm pea brained a little bit. I'm pea brained too. Don't worry about it. Hey. Two peas in a pod. What were you doing? What'd you do in London?

Tell me about London. London, kind of same thing. We just kind of bounced around pubs. Okay. I have a drinking problem. Yeah? Well, it's more of like, I'm more of like a drinking athlete, I guess.

Ah. So you, but did you mingle with the locals there too, either, or no? More, more in, yeah, in London, the locals there were pretty sick. They would just come around and they, they were just always drinking. I don't know, like, London's pretty mundane.

Can you give us a British accent? Did you pick anything up? Hello. Yeah. Hello, mate. Good. Very good. Hey mate, what would they say?

Bro. Bro? Brov, he's right, brov. Hey bro, I'm smoking a. Hmm. Oh. Yeah. Very good.

That's like pretty much what they say. Yeah, no, that is exactly what they say. I felt like I was in London when you said that. Yeah, sort of like Jolly Old London. Yeah, Liverpool or something, that was really good. They call cigarettes that. Yeah, they do. Yeah, I know, I live on planet Earth. I didn't know it was on there.

Yeah, I know what they... What? Well, he does one. Oh, it's great to meet you, Sketch. It's so good, right? Welcome to London, Sketch. I'm a friend. My name is Bean Grottoes. I'm Bean Grottoes too.

Sounded like a comic character. Well see, I do it and he does a cowboy. He does like a little, an Asian cowboy. I'm Franku. Asian cowboy? I'm Franku, right? Yeah. Look at that.

Pretty good, huh? Giddy-up-a. Giddy-up-a. That's an Asian cowboy. That's, huh? Giddy up. Giddy up. That's an Asian cowboy. That's a good name. Giddy up. You like Asian chicks? Do I like Asian chicks?

Yeah. What's your favorite? Yeah, ethnicity. The lady I'm talking to is a little Asian. Ooh. Half or full? Like, I don't know, I gotta investigate that a little more. Right.

Only seen her in the dark so far. I'm not even sure she's Asian. She just was like. Stop. Okay. Stop for a second. Let me just, please. Let's, I just need to. Yeah.

Yeah, Rakoop. I've only seen her in the dark. God is good. God is great. God is, no, all the time. God is good, God is great. Yeah, yeah. No, no, it's all the time.

And is she like loop loop? Is, God is great. Yeah, yeah. No, no, it's all the time. And is she like loop loop? Is she like loop loop? Yeah, yeah. She doesn't talk like loop loop, but she has some characteristics. Ooh. Smaller feet, a little bit of that going on. Yes.

We also smoked a little bit, so. In the dark? Outside. Outside? Everything was in low lighting, not pitch black. Yeah. Are you saying that she could be a guy? I wouldn't be the first time.

There you go. No, no, no, no. I feel like there you go. When you there you go. What? No, she was perfect. No, she's a beautiful young woman. And what?

She lived here in LA or Texas? Texas. Oh, so you can't wait to get back to her Oh, I just bring her out here sometimes. She's here now. Um, she was here. No, what's your last love to me? Oh, she was how old is she? Um, she's my age like 24 Wow. She's a cutie. You guys know her Okay This makes no sense to me. Can I just do some investigating? Yeah, do it. Okay, thank you so much. But the more you talk to them, the less we can hear them.

I'm not gonna talk to them anymore, but they did shook their heads, so they've never met this person before. They didn't say no, yeah. So yeah, so you've only seen her in the dark, okay, but she's been out here, but no one's seen her, right? So what's going on here, buddy? My close friends have seen her.

Well, like they don't live with me. Okay, okay. So like people have seen her. Yeah. She's a real person. This isn't she goes to another school. She goes to another school. Yeah.

Oh, she goes to a different school. Right. Pretty much. Across town. Across town, okay. Trying to beat the allegations school. Oh, she goes to a different school. Right. Pretty much. Across town. Across town, okay. Trying to beat the allegations here. All right, so here's the deal. You're doing a good job.

He's doing a very good job. So this girl that you're seeing now might be Asian, but have you dated many other races of girls or no? I've been around the world. Oh, you have? Not dating, I mean, like just, you know. Just hooking up. Sharing love. Yeah, swapping a bit. Sharing love. I'm a like just, you know. Just hook it up. Sharing love.

Yeah, swap it a bit. Sharing love. I'm a lover, not a fighter? Yeah, yeah. Well, naked wrestling. Yeah. Well, naked wrestling. Yeah.

I like the whites. Why is that? He does, he only dates white girls. Is that true? Exclusively. I thought you had a, are you married? No, not. He got out of a long-term relationship

with a woman who was Asian. Okay. But now since then he's gone real white. I'm just going on a white tour right now. Yeah. So like mostly just like up in Washington, DC or something? Well, there are whites all over the country. Yeah, the good news is we're everywhere.

We've got to get the real ones though. Oh, there's real ones up north. Well, there's different types of, I mean like- Oh, explain to me the types because I'm not white and you're white so you can give me the categories. Give me the real ones though. Oh, there's real ones up north. Well, there's different types of, I mean like. Oh, explain to me the types because I'm not white and you're white so you can give me the categories. Give me the fucking categories here. Cajun, hillbilly. Oh, hillbilly, yes.

Tan. Tan. Not tan. Not tan. Kinda Asian. Fat. Could be Asian. Yeah. Is fat, would fat be one? Fat, there are fat white checks. Exactly, I've seen that show, 600 Pound Life. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Love. Love that show. Love that show. You like that that show 600 pound life. Yeah. Yeah love Love that show love that show you like that show love. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, although I've been watching 600 pound life where are they now and You know what they should call it 600 pound live. They're still 600 pounds. Yeah Where are they now? They're so fat. All right, right? How could you yeah, yeah 600 pounds. Yeah. Yeah, weights. How could you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. 600 pounds? Yeah, yeah. That's two of you.

That's so much to lose. Dude, that's so rude. No, it's not. It is. It's a little rude. It's okay. You're built like the lower half of a snowman, but you're okay.

What's up, brother? Yes, pup. Okay. Very good, dude. Very good. Yeah, anyway. What's next on the tour? The tour?

The tour. The tour. The tour. The tour. The tour. The tour. What's up, brother? Yes, pup. Okay, very good. Very good. Yeah, anyway. What's next on the tour for you? Like where are you going after LA? You gonna go back to Houston?

I go to Houston probably for a Texans game. Oh, you're right. Now are you going on the field? They put you on the field? I mean, like I can probably, yes. Yeah, you should. It was in plan. Managers right there, we should get that thing moving.

Yeah, let's get that shit on the road. That's right. Get him on the fucking field. Have you met any of the Texans? Yeah, I've met Stroud, I've met Tankdell, John Metchi, Stefan Diggs. Ooh, Stefan Diggs, the man. Yeah, they're all pretty sick.

I'm a Bears fan. We play you guys in week two. Oh yeah. Dude, you should go to the game. Invite me. You wanna go to the game? Yes, I do. All right. We got extra boxes. We gotta be on the field. We gotta be on the field. We tell the manager, we gotta, no, you don't come, no, no, yeah. Yeah. Dude, you should go to the game. Invite me. You want to go to the game? Yes, I do. All right.

We got extra boxes. We're going to the field. We got to be on the field. We tell the manager, we got to, no, you don't come. No, no, no. Oh, we can make that happen. You would never want to go to a football game in a million years, ever, ever.

I've been to them. When? When I was a kid. I had a friend named Tyler Phillips. He was blind in one eye. Have you ever talked about Tyler Phillips? Who are you, Theo Vaughn right now? No, I sort of, no. So I was friends with a guy named Tyler Phillips, he was blind in one eye. Have you talked about Tyler Phillips? Who are you, Theo Vaughn right now? No, I sort of, no.

So I was friends with a guy named Tyler Phillips, right? And the reason why I stopped hanging out with him, because when I spent the night, I spent the night at his house once, right? And he slept on his left side of his face, but it's the right eye where he's missing the eye. And it just opened. No.

While we were sleeping. Yeah, and I was looking at him and he opened his eyes and he go, are you awake Tyler? And he was sleeping and it freaked me out. That was it. That was it. What does that do with the football game? Yeah, where did that go? Well, let me finish.

I'm not even fucking done, dude. You're being rude, dude. I'm leading you. All right, so my dad, right? Tyler Phillips' dad was rich. Yeah. So he goes, he goes to my dad and he goes, would you like to see, we have, you know,

I mean box seating at the- Chargers. No, Minnesota Viking. Cause the one we lived in Minnesota. Oh, that was in Minnesota? Yeah, yeah. Oh. And I remember my dad and I went to the fucking

Vikings game in these box seats. And my dad and I went to the fucking Vikings game in these box seats and my dad was just asleep the whole fucking time. It was super embarrassing. What is it, who cares? Yeah, but it's like, we're in the box seats. There's like other people, people were cheering and my fucking old Korean dad, you know, was sleeping, it was fucking embarrassing.

He needed rest, he worked really hard. Yeah. Fashion Gal took a lot of time. So I did see that game, and I saw a couple Chargers games, all right, so I've been there. You have? Yeah, yeah.

I like being invited to things. Well, let's invite you, but you won't go. Fine, I won't go, but I would like to get invited. Right, that's kind of the whole point. Love to have you. I'd love to be there. But it is nice to get invited, right? I don't want to get invited.

We don't get invited to parties, like he gets to go to these cool fucking parties, we don't want to get invited. We don't get invited to parties. He gets to go to these cool fucking parties. We don't get to go to that. When's the last party I was invited to? Well, you've been invited to parties. When? At Russell Crowe's house?

That was because of the thing. But were you invited, was that a party? A get together. No, it's a party. Get together. What's the difference between a party and a get together? Everybody knows there's a big difference between a party and a get together. All right, give me party. Get together. What's the difference between a party and a get together? Everybody knows there's a big difference

between a party and a get together. All right, give me the difference, because I don't know. A party is... Oh, so there's gotta be a DJ. And a get together is like... Okay, so I've never been invited to a party, I've only gone to get DJs.

I've never been to a party where there's a DJ at somebody's house. Fuck that, yeah you have, that's such a lie. Absolutely, I never been to a party where there's a DJ at somebody's house. Fuck that, yeah you have. That's such a lie. Absolutely. I've been places with you where there's DJs. Who? Fucking Whitney always has someone doing a DJ.

Yeah, that's somebody on a fucking iPhone. That's what a fucking DJ is! Yeah. Someone with an iPhone going, here's my planlance. I hate that by the way. That's what a DJ is. I hate that by the way. What's your party music you play?

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Yeah, just running a low budget right now. No chance. No, I'm just kidding. But like I just don't, if I break things, I don't really get them fixed. What version of the, is that what version? That one? That's a new one, it's just shattered.

Yeah, yeah. It's probably two years old? Yeah, but it's all in pieces. We gotta get you something new. Not a bad thing. I bet you the reason why you don't get a new phone is because it's update. I'm always scared that, not scared,

but I have to download all the stuff. Oh, redo the thing again? Redo all the stuff. Yeah, Apple makes you do the thing again where you gotta transfer it to the phone. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I actually like that. It feels like a new start whenever I go get a new one.

No, actually, I think you're right. I think they made it easier. They have made it think you're right. I think they made it easier. They have made it a little bit easier. I think they made it easier, yeah, yeah, yeah. But still, I don't like getting the new phone every time because I know people that do that. Yeah, you gotta use iCloud and then you gotta drop it in. I'll wait till I need it, but then this is a call.

You need it, you know what I mean? Yeah, it's time. Do you get little newties on your direct message? Ooh, little nudie DMs, little bad boy nudie DMs. Lately, it's a. Do you get a little new, you get nudies on your direct message? Ooh, little nudie DMs? Little bad boy nudie DMs? Lately it's a lot of pictures of me. A lot of, so people send you pictures of you? No, we're just people trolling.

But yeah, like, yeah, I mean like, get people like more trolling stuff. You get a lot of trolls right now. Yeah. Fuck that. Oh, so- Post, what I call post-DJ. Now, did you, does those hurt your feelings or no?

No, I mean, I thought you just click it, pass it. And then I kind of just live my life. Well, let me tell you something. That's great. Greatest piece of advice. What a healthy outlook. Fuck all that shit. Fuck all that.

Fuck all those people that say dumb shit, whatever they're saying, fuck all those people and fuck all the shit they say. They obviously are jealous or they're obviously fans because they wouldn't take the time to reach out if they weren't. Love it. So that's, so fuck them if they hate you and keep doing that

because I think that's the best move you can do. You know what the worst time, you know what, here's the worst kind of messages I get. I did the worst messages lately. I mean, I know. No, you don't. Oh. This is a new one. Oh.

They'll go, dude, I'm such a huge fan, dude, and fuck all those haters, right? Uh-huh. Right, and I'm like, in my mind, I'm like, what are you talking about? I know. You hear me? So now in my mind, I'm like, there's so many haters.

You hear me? Just say that you like me, you know what I mean? He's like, I've been reading your comments, man, don't even read that shit. I go, how many are there now? And now you're gonna look. Yeah, yeah, you know what I mean? I hate it. It's just, give me the compliment, Yeah, yeah, you know what I mean? I hate it.

It's just, give me the compliment, don't go, you know what I mean? This other stuff is out there. I mean, look, mine's the most untantalizing. Let's see what this is, ready? Let's go, let's jump in the request folder. All right, here we go, ready? Cameo, just DM me, the app.

Look at that, DM me too. Hey, Andrew, give us a try. Would you like to give us a try? Nope. Don't, your first one is an ad. Yeah. Do they keep, you know what's so funny about Cameo? They start sending me a hot chick won't do it.

Oh yeah. Like the prettiest girl, and she's like, hey, I just want you to know I'm a big fan. Will you do Cameo? It's like, they tricked me. What? They know you're ready. They know. They know you're, I'm a big fan. Will you do cameo? It's like, they tricked me. What? They know you're ready. They know.

They know you're ready. This is so bad. There's like literally nothing in here. It's really funny. There's like nothing in here. Yeah. Hey bro, when are you gonna come to the UK? Can I have $50?

Can I have $50? Andrea Jin's calling me, should I pick it up? Yeah. No, no, no, cause she won't know. She won't know who that is. She's very nice though. Andrea Jin, she's a comic. She'll pick up. Yeah. No, no, no, cause he won't know who that is. She's very nice though. Andrea Jin, she's a comic. She'll pick up a picture.

She's a- A good looking lady? Yeah, well she's loop loop. She's loop loop. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's who the character's based on. Oh, who's that? Yeah, yeah.

No, she is, yeah. Are you her sister? Uh-huh. Well, they all are. Well, we're all brothers and sisters. That's right. So you say what's up brother and you should do an Asian what's up sister.

What's up sister? There. See that came out naturally. It go down. So he goes up, you go down. What's up sister? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's good. What's up sister? Really like that? What's up brother? What's up sister? It's pretty good. You know, dude, can we hang out or? Yeah, I'm down.

Like if I go to Texas, like we gotta hang out with this guy. Don't you like to sleep a lot? He is right. Wait, I'm sorry. Where would you learn information like that? TikTok and stuff like that. He knows who the fuck you are. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

So yeah, you're- Yeah, I sleep a lot. You're acting like that's a out of pocket thing to say. Your nickname is a slept king. What the fuck? I know, but I'll tell you why I sleep a lot. I know. Why?

Is that 285 getting you? No. It hurts so bad. You know what it is? No, you don't even know. I just discovered it. Well, sometimes you're a little depressy-weshy. That hurts so bad. I know what it is. You know what it is? No, you don't even know. I discovered, I just discovered it. Well, sometimes you're a little depressy-weshy. That's not why.

Well, sometimes you've eaten too many meals. That's good. That's one. Yeah, yeah. Sometimes- Oh God, I gotta tell you. You're staying up too late playing video games. Do you stay up till four or five in the morning

playing video games? No, just mostly kind of just can't sleep. And then I don't really sleep too much, but like I stay up just chilling. How many hours a night are you getting of sleep? Probably four or something. Let's get to that. You know what you should do next time

you're three in the morning, you can't sleep, call me. Let's chat. Okay. You know what I mean? Let's chat with each other. Check in. Just roll over. Yeah, that'd be.

That's right, you're right there. Oh, yeah. You know what I would like to do with, that's very good. Let's FaceTime each other. We'll be in the band. We'll be in the, you'll right there. Oh, yeah. You know what I would like to do with, that's very good. Let's FaceTime each other. We'll be in the band, we'll be in the, you'll be in your bed in Houston. I'll be in my bed in LA. We FaceTime.

And side to side. And let's do like, let's whisper good night to each other. Okay. Would that be nice? Yeah. I'll go. A little love in there? Mmm.

God, wow. You look like you got soft lips. Oh. He does. I just got so uncomfortable. I don't know why. You got excited. You look like you're a good pister.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, pretty good. But you know, that's how dare you too, you know? Hey, it's like a- Yeah. Yeah, you know what? Your lips look nice. Thank you.

He's blushing. You're blushing. I'm actually blushing. Yeah, it's wild. Yeah, it's wild. It looks like you drank alcohol you. He's blushing. I'm actually blushing. Yeah, it's wild. Yeah, it's wild. It looks like you drank alcohol. No, I hear the- He's pitching a tent. Stand up, check him.

Uh-uh. What? What if I was hard right now? Oh my God, that'd be so bad. We wouldn't be able to tell, don't worry. Dude, that's a nut. Dude, you're so on it today. Thank you, sir.

Fucking, the sumo joke was great. Great. Yeah, yeah, I'm 280. That was good. Great. Yeah, small dick now. Great. Yeah, I love it. He's hitting you from a high. All over the fucking place, you know what I mean? Tell me why you can't sleep.

What's, I have sleep apnea. What's the fuck? What? Yeah, you do. Yeah, you do. What, what? You definitely have sleep. No, but here's what the deal did. You know what sleep apnea is? Yeah, like where you can't sleep? No, you- Yeah, sketch, that is right.

That is right. I mean, no, where you're asleep and then you can't breathe. You stop breathing. You stop breathing and then you just kind of wake up. And you see, sometimes you go. Yeah, and I gasp for air. It's the first time I've ever seen that. I've never seen that. You stop breathing and then you just kind of wake up. And sometimes you go. Yeah, and I gasp for air.

It's the first time you ever laughed. I like it. Yeah. Yeah. What? It gives you joy when I struggled for breath. Hey, yeah, sometimes. Yeah.

No, I'm just kidding. No, so what I do, but what's great about my situation is so I'll just set my fucking clock at 3 p.m. Why don't you just get a sleep apnea machine? I won't, I refuse. Get one, we'll buy him one. No, I refuse.

Yeah, what is, is that a sleep apnea machine? That's, that goes on your, you want one of those? Yeah, I'll take two of them. What? That's a wiener machine. One for me and one for my friend. Do you want a wiener machine? Sure.

We have like a hundred of them. How much was it? I don't know. They gave us. Hundreds of dollars, but you can have it for free. Okay, let's go. Okay. Have you used a Wiener machine? They used to call me the Wiener machine.

Yeah, that's true. High school. No, I'm just kidding. So I'll tell you why we can sleep. So what I do now is I... Dude, come on, dude. That's insane. Is that what you need?

Is that what you need? Yeah, I'm not wearing that. You got one of those? That's what you need. Because Joe Coy wears that. I'm not wearing that. No, he doesn't? Yeah, he does.

Oh, wow. He showed me. I'm not wearing that. Okay. So here's the thing. So I wake up later so that when I wake up from a sleep apnea breath thing, I go back to bed and I go, since I don't have any time to wake up, I can just relax and go, I'll just sleep whenever.

And then here's another second thing I've been doing, is I've been controlling the ants. Oh, you got control of the ants finally. I don't know if you guys know this, but because of the heat, there's a war. And I'm telling you right now, I'm winning it. And I'll tell you what I'm doing. I got three things.

I got three devils. What do you got? No, just dirt devil. Oh, the dirt devil. I get it. All right. You have three vacuums. I bought three of them.

You could have just bought one and used it a lot. No, no, no. I need three. You position them? Yes. So they're in post. He sets them up like a podcast. That's for exactly right. One straight on, two from the side. So I got three. You position them? Yes. So they're in post. He sets them up like a podcast. That's exactly right.

One straight on, two from the side. So I got three of them, right? I got probably 3000 of the hotels. And hotels. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right. The traps. Right.

They have the sweet juice on it. I know it. You know it, right? It gets me sometimes. And there's just hundreds of bottles of Raid. And so you're raiding your whole house. Yeah, and I'm having a war and I am winning this world war.

I bet you are. And sometimes, you know what I've been doing lately? What? Crushing it with my finger. You're a bad boy. Yeah, I crush each one of them and I make a comment. What do you say?

You wanna fuck around with my fucking thick thumb or whatever, I don't know. No, that's not right. No, I go, what? That sounds right. I'll fuck you, you know, I'll just say things, you know what I mean? Yeah.

Come into my house, bitch, you know what I mean? Look at that. And I kind of, because they're strong. No. Yeah, they can hold 16 times their weight or whatever. I Googled it. It's still one, one thousandth. I know, but if you smash it just briefly,

these little legs still go, ooh, like that. No, I can fuck, I gotta get them. Pancake. Pancake. I pancaked them out. I get it. Right? So-

Have you thought about- Stop. Hiring someone for a minute? No, I will not. No, yeah. So look at that Right? So- Have you thought about- Stop. Hiring someone- No, I will not. No, yeah. So look at that. That's a fucking, that's a building. I know that's a leaf,

but that's like a human being lifting a building. It's like, it's, yeah. Or like whatever weights. 20 times their weight they can lift. Exactly. So, you know, so my point being is this- You know, you're 200,000 times its weight. No, I'm just, I'm just saying like, you know what I mean?

Can I just finish my thing or no? Please. All right. So at night, when I feel like the war has won. Are you talking about the dick machines right now? Yeah. No, no, I'm talking about the ants. No, I'm fucking.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Once I've, and there's no ants inside. Yeah. I can go to bed. So that's when the peace comes into play. That's when the peace comes into play. I hate them so much. Don't you hate ants?

I don't really get them. And if I did, I would hire someone to come in and clean them up. Okay, good. That's your thing. You buy three dirt devils, you stay up all night. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, but the dirt devils is great

because it makes you feel like an X-Men. You know what I mean? Like I'm Storm or whatever. You know what I mean? And they go, what the fuck? You know what I mean? And they get sucked in. You know what I mean?

And I love seeing them in the little fucking, what do you call it? The little chamber. Little window there. You know what I mean? They don't know what the fuck to hit they get sucked in. And I love seeing them in the little fucking, what do you call it? The little chamber. Little window there. They don't know what the fuck to hit them. Well, this is a little- You suck and they- Torture.

Yeah, yeah, they fuck, it fucks them up, dude. The Lee dynasty. That's right. Yeah, don't fuck with the Lee dynasty. Don't fuck with the Lee dynasty. Sketch, have you had fun on the show today? I've had a lot of fun. Well, I thank you for coming on the show.

That was so fun. Do you wanna leave us with any words of wisdom, Sketch? And do you wanna impart fun on the show today? I've had a lot of fun. Well, I thank you for coming on the show. That was so fun. Do you wanna leave us with any words of wisdom for the sketch and do you wanna impart anything on the crew before we let you go? Thanks for having me. I don't know, probably stay away from Lupu. Yeah. Stay away from Lupu.

Get the name right, Tachi. Hey, hey, hey, hey. Lup, Lup, you fuck. Lup, Lup. Hey, yeah. Lup, Lup, STML. Yeah, yeah. We're term memory loss.

I don't know if you're sexually attracted to me or we're friends. No, you just turned me on from a distance. Wow. Close to you. That's a good compliment. From a distance. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It looks good from afar. Yeah. You get close, it's different. It's more the sense. I'm not really too, no, I just fuck with you. No, no, I love you, dude. You're a good, dude, you know, you're like a white version of me scents. I'm not really too... No, I just fuck with you. No, no, I love you, dude. I love you more.

Dude, you know, you're like a white version of me. Yeah. Kind of. It's pretty sick. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, if I, this is who I was at 25. If you give me a mustache and... You'll be able to grow one one day.

One day. I'm working on it. You shave? I shaved like a month ago or something. Holy shit. That's like you, yeah. That thing took him 52 years to get on his face. Let's get him in a movie. I'd love on his face. Let's get him in a movie.

I'd love to. I'd love to get him in a movie. Him and I ever do a movie, you're in our movie. Okay. You'll do it? What type of movie are we talking about? Action, action, baby. Action comedy. Hey, look at that. Yeah, yeah.

We'll negotiate with the manager. He's right there. We'll get him a good role. No, I think the role is already you're in a cage. No. No, no, no, and you want role is already you're in a cage. No, this is- No, no, no, and you want us to unleash the fucking fury? Yeah. Right? Unleash the virus?

Yeah. Why does it have to always go back to COVID? Sorry. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's over. Some people don't think so. And now it's back. Wow.

Sketch as COVID. Well, give him a round of applause. That was fucking great. Thank you so much. Appreciate you. Just look into that camera and just say, thank you for being a bad friend. Just fire it.

Yeah, whatever. Thank you for being a bad friend. Love that. Love it. You know what I can't stand on fucking, when I'm scrolling? Videos of the last day with their pet. Oh, I hate this.

I had to fucking swipe so fast. I hate it. I don't want to see that. It's always a white woman with a dog in her hand. And I know what video it is because they start crying, right? And then you can look at the dog and the dog just barely, you know what I mean?

The dog's like, eee, whatever they're doing. I saw one of those split screens on TikTok. It was a one girl with her final day with the dog and the other one, an Asian guy eating it. There it is. That's that. No.

I can't stand those videos. I can't stand those videos. I saw, you know what the worst one was? I saw a guy and it looked like a beautiful video of just him with his dog. Yeah. But then at the very end, he goes, "'I'll miss you, it's our final days.'"

And I was like, oh my. Oh my God, I can't do it. Don't wanna think about it. Another one is pet negligence. What? What is this? Oh, like people leaving in the car and stuff? No, it's even worse.

Oh no, I don't wanna hear it. It's gonna, if it's gonna- No, no, I'm just gonna tell you. All right. I'm just telling you what I don't like. Yeah. All right. It's like whenever it's like, fluffy, fluffy, fluffy!

And then an alligator eats it. Oh yeah. I'm like, what is fluffy doing around an alligator? Why are you at the lake? Yeah, yeah, fucking put a fucking leash! Yeah, get a leash. If you know there's an alligator, you put a leash. We had a scare, dude.

I told you when I was back home, my dog, we had to take her to the emergency vet. She was puking and shitting blood. Which, oh no. Cubs, yeah, I got so scared. No, we had to take my dog to the vet because she was throwing up blood in the middle of the night and then she was shitting blood.

I got real scared. Oh wow, when was this? In Chicago, just last week. And then what happened? We took her to the vet, they ran all the tests, they ran the x-ray was this? In Chicago, just last week. And then what happened? We took her to the vet, they ran all the tests, they ran the x-ray, they did blood work, all that stuff. They think that she might've eaten something strange and it got into the lining of her stomach.

Oh no. But we couldn't find out what it was, so then we changed her diet and did that whole thing with the rice and the thing. And then three days later, she was okay, so. Oh thank God. Dude. Thank the Lord.

In the middle of the night, I'm cleaning up blood out of my mom's carpet and I'm like bawling. I'm just bawling, cleaning up blood. I'm like. Are you really crying? Oh yeah, hard. I was so scared.

I thought she was gonna die. Wow. She threw up blood all over the place. Incredible. I was like, oh God, please don't be something very serious of panicking. Also, not cheap to take your dog to the vet. Yeah, yeah.

Oh my God. Oh my God. Yeah. Do you have pet insurance? Oh no. What? You can get that? Yeah.

You're not getting money. I just put cash down. Money, money. Look at the big money guy over there. No, not big money. I'm just saying like, what is it gonna, well, come on. Guess how much it was. A spleen was.

Guess how much it was for. Two grand. Huh? A sp it gonna walk along guess how much a spleen? Well, yes how much it was for and huh? It's bling's two grand. No a spleen I don't know which is buying it on the black market. Yeah X-rays and blood work. What was how much? 500 Wow, how much 1200 how much? Two grand how much for a grand? Get out. No, no, it's okay. What is it? 1600.

Wow. I was like, oh my God. Yeah, that's expensive. For an X-ray and a blood and a thing. That's what I spent on Postmates every day. Trust me. Here's another thing that scares me. My brother Steve, he was like,

he'll send me photos of like two frogs. No, I'm not kidding you. I'm not fucking kidding you. Dissecting them? No, he has two frogs and then he'll zoom out and there's like an aquarium that he had built. Oh no, I don't wanna. He's like, you know Charlie and Frankie?

You know, I just got them. Like in my mind, they're gonna die. Yeah. My brother's not gonna be able to keep two frogs alive? No. Yeah, it's like, why be able to keep two frogs alive? No. Yeah, it's like, why does he do that? He has a new dog now. Well, what's the lifespan of a frog?

Yeah, what is the lifespan of a frog? Of an average frog. He's got a dog? Yeah. One day to 30 years. Wow, that's all life. That's huge difference. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's all life.

Yeah, that's us. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Here's another thing that I discovered in Chinatown. They fucking paint and they sell turtles, right? Oh, I love that. They're painting their shells, like you paint your nails. Yeah, but the paint's so toxic, they die. Yeah, but I-

Look at this beautiful, shit. Is this a thing that's going on? That's what I saw. Turtle painting? What is that? Painted turtle? Yeah. It's kind of like when you see someone die

all their dogs hair. That is beautiful. Why do they dye their dog's hair? You know, people do that. You see that? Yeah. What's that about? I don't like that. I don't like that at all. There's no way the dog likes that.

They don't like it. I don't want to be, it doesn't want to be dyed. Or like poodles where they shave the sides or they get the back puffy. Like no one gives a fuck. Cut it out. Yeah, yeah. Unless they want to get an award, you can get awards for those. Cut it out. Yeah, yeah. Unless they want to get an award,

you can get awards for those. The dog shows? Yeah, yeah. I don't like the dog show. Oh my God, this is the painted. Painted donkey. It's a painted donkey as a zebra. Oh my God.

Mexico is awesome. Yeah. And his fucking butthole's all blasted out probably. For no reason. No, there's a reason. Why did you assume it was Mexico? It said Mexico. It said Mexico on it. You're the only fuckers that do that.

Zoom in, that box says Mexico. Yeah. It says Mexico and says tequila on the hat behind it. Yeah, yeah. How much more obvious could it be? Yeah. If we can make the announcement now, if you'd like to, we are all, we are as of 2025,

gonna fire all three of you. Yeah. Finding new blood. So people at home, if you would like to be a new blood and replace one of these three guys, please. Carlos at the booth. Carlos at the booth. Carlos at the booth at gmail.com.

Yeah. Please send an email over why you think you should replace one of these morons at Carlos in the booth at the booth. In the booth. Carlos in the booth. Thank you, Fancy. That's another reason you're getting fired. Carlos in the booth at the booth. In the booth. Carlos in the booth. Thank you, fancy. That's another reason you're getting fired.

Carlos in the booth at gmail.com. I have a side note question, if I may. You always may. Thank you. So I've been hiking, I have been hiking far. Can I ask? Go ahead. You hiked once?

No. You hiked many? Many times. Okay. And I've been eating the same, but I'm not losing any weight. You hiked once? No. You hike many? Many times. Okay. And I've been eating the same, but I'm not losing any weight. What's going on? Let's talk about what you're eating.

No, I'm eating the same. Eating the same what? Bread. All bread the whole time while you're hiking? I've been like- You'll eat a loaf of bread while you hike. No, no, no. What I'm saying is I'm eating as much

as I have been eating. And that's the problem. Right. But then I'm like, oh, well then I'll just incorporate long hikes every day. You have to change the diet and exercise. It's both, it's not just one. So what you're saying to me is if I eat the same and no matter how much I exercise, I'm still gonna be fat?

Let me give you something that's gonna blow your mind. Most of the time, it's all diet. It's all diet. Almost always. Then don't exercise. It's not gonna kill you to not, but it's gonna kill you to eat. But it's not gonna do anything.

But if you keep eating at the same rate, it will kill you. Okay. My wife's boss died at 93 years old. He never exercised a day in his life. It's all the, what he ate. But he ate right. He ate great. He just ate like healthy and that's it.

So I tried to do the whole all meat thing. Very difficult. It's gross. Yeah. All just meat, just beef all day. Yeah. It's gross. It's pretty difficult.

Your shits stink. They do stink. Yeah. And it gurgles my stomach. Yeah, you get gurgly burglary. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can't have that. I'm just trying different things, but it's like, you know,

but I love the bread. Let's do the diet of the blue zones, like legumes, a lot of beans. Are you eating beans? No. You gotta eat beans. Why? Everybody in the Blue Zones eats them. Okay.

The Blue Zone diet, see a lot of these guys, it's wild. All right, give me the Blue Zone. It's a lot of plant-based fruits, vegetables, beans, tofu, lentils, nuts, seeds, rich with disease-fighting nutrients are the cornerstone of their diets. When they eat meat, fish, eggs, dairy, they treat it as a condiment rather than the feature.

Well, then Dane's wrong! Who's wrong? Dane! Who is that the feature. Well then Dane's wrong. Who's wrong? Dane. Who is that? Cook. Oh, the cook is wrong. He was like, just eat, six months, I've only been eating meat.

Maybe it works for him. So I'm like, oh, should I do it? Yeah, yeah, trust me. Well, that's the problem. He's a cook, not a chef. You gotta listen to it. Oh. No, he-

Dane Chef. Dane Chef. Have you met him? I've never met Dane Chef. Oh, I know Dane Chef well. I'll introduce you. That's the issue though. I've never met Dane Chef. Oh, I know Dane Chef well, I'll introduce you. That's the issue though. We should be eating more of that.

Oh, okay. And treat meat like a side item, not the main core, not the main star. So have a little bit of meat, but have a lot more of the other stuff. Okay, what's that? Air One Granola, they have a bunch of this stuff. No, I have Air One Granola at home.

What do you want me to do with it? Throw it away. Oh, I throw it away? Throw at home. What do you want me to do with it? Throw it away. Oh, I throw it away? Throw it away. Why? Stuff's filled with sugar and bullshit. Throw that shit away. But can't you get like seeds and nuts and stuff

from Air One so it looks like it's cool? You wanna really set it up? Yeah. Go through a Blue Zone diet, like an actual grocery list and buy it for them and see if it works for a week. This is all I need. Me? What?

Me? I need you forever. Aside from you. Okay. What I need is and this is what? Me? I need you forever. God bless. Yeah, but aside from you. Okay. What I need is somebody to go, this is all you're eating today. Yes, let's get you a- And I'm always like, I'll go, okay, I'll just eat this.

Right. I don't know where to go for that. That's what he needs. Not a private chef. No, no, no, not a chef, but just someone that's a nutritionist. I think we help change the diet. It'll get us over the edge.

Don't you guys think so? I think so. I think we get a little diet change and that's gonna be it. Tell me what you ate today. Let's go through it. Oh, so I went to Kinzik Chicken. Kinzik Chicken?

I'll show you, it's so good. It's called- Have him bring it up. What is it called? Kit sit, wait. City chicken? No, that's, I just, they say city, I didn't say city, dog.

Yeah, Kim's- Here. It's called Kismic, Kismet. Kismet, like a romantic meetup. Yeah. Kismet chicken. Yeah, so good, dude. Okay.

Look at that, look at that. Yeah, rotisserie chicken, good for you. Yeah. So you had, what did you have though? So I had that, that meal. Did you eat the bread? Yeah, I ordered two breads, yeah. Right, so let's stop that part.

Just eat the chicken and the veg and you're- I know the bread's so good though. I'm sure it is. The hummus. I'm sure. Yeah, so I ate that and that was really good. Okay, that's all you had. Yeah, look at that.

You should eat there. You know where that- No, had. Yeah, look at that. You should eat there. You know where that- No, it looks good. But what I would suggest is smaller meals. Just a bunch of smaller meals. That's what they say. I don't know. How about we try him fruit till noon?

You know this guy? Fruit till noon. There's a guy that only eats fruit till noon. You know it's fruit till noon and then you eat a meal. There he is. And he looks great. Okay. Fruit till noon. Is that Asey? I don't know if that's the guy. That's There he is. And he looks great. Okay. Fruit till noon.

Is that acai? I don't know if that's the guy. That's not the guy. I don't like that guy. Probably doesn't wake up till 3 p.m. Yeah, so he's eating fruit till noon. Oh, here's another thing that I think is the reason why I've been gaining weight,

is acai balls. Sugar. Yeah. Lot of sugar. And there's this one, this is my favorite one, but I think it's too much, it's too sweet. And I've been eating maybe one or two of them a day. Don't eat.

With the peanut butter and with all the fruits in it too, and the granola. So many, it's so much. It's so sweet. You don't need it. It's so good, but I don't think that's the problem. Yeah. What about?

And I think I have, I don't know if I have to cut this out, but I have an issue. What? Black toe. You got black toe? Yeah. Let me see.

You can't see because I covered it with fucking toenail polish. How did you get black toe? Repeated trauma? Yeah, I hit it and then it won't heal. It's been six months, it's black. Gout? No, it's not gout.

It's not gout, dude. What is this, medieval? What are you talking about? My college roommate had gout. Really? Yeah. Yeah, you can get it. Anyway, it's not go to the right medieval My college roommate head out really yeah, yeah, you can get it. It's not nail fun. Let's move on