Bad Friends - Magic Water & The 3rd World Genie

Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey! Hey, bad friends, friends, friends. Hey, bad friends, we are on tour, baby. Where are we going? We're going to Milwaukee. Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Yeah, baby. With the beer and cheese.

Starting point is 00:00:09 With the beer and cheese. And Jeffrey Dahmer. Oh, he's there. Will he be coming to the show? No, but there's those types of whites. All right, then the next night we're in Chicago, then we go to Minneapolis. John Wayne Gacy.

Starting point is 00:00:19 Yes, yes. Chicago. All your favorite serial killers. We need a lapliz Minnesota. And what are your killers from there? And then, probably McCone. He'll be a killer. Yeah, McCone's from there.

Starting point is 00:00:28 And then Madison, Wisconsin is how we end the year. And then in the new year, we've got a big run. We go to January 20th. We're going to be at the Atlantic City, New Jersey, by bay. Come on, gamble. So Lake City, Utah, January 27th, by bay. Then, to Mecula.

Starting point is 00:00:40 Do you know where to Mecula is? Yeah, man. It's right by Powai, where I grew up. That's exactly right. And that's where you're going to meet my, Dan, my small sponsor. I'm going to meet Dan, your sponsor, to mechul is yeah, man? It's right by how I wear a Love and that's where you're gonna meet my Dan the smile sponsor. I'm gonna meet Daniel sponsor To mechula so come on out to Pachanga on February 2nd Then we do Reno Nevada sacriamento Long Beach Long Beach Then we do we do Windsor Ontario and Niagara Falls back-to-back in Canada

Starting point is 00:01:00 Then we do two son and zone where do we finish on four to Las Vegas Nevada April 20th 2024 come see us line. Come see us get your tickets. Go to badfriends pod.com badfriends pod.com You two are bad friends. You are these two idiots. Oh my god. You and Asian. You two are disgusting. Oh you two are something bad friends.

Starting point is 00:01:23 Hello. Hello and what do we have here? We have you know dude. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you.

Starting point is 00:01:31 I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you.

Starting point is 00:01:39 I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. I'll be back with you. We got a million. No, we got an award from the YouTube. Yeah, we passed a million subs. That's amazing. I don't know. We could, you get awards for that.

Starting point is 00:01:46 Let's go back to this now. Let's go back to that. Okay, so number one, what do you, when you get water, right? We talk to the most annoying thing when you have water. What's the most annoying thing when I get water? When you drink water. When I drink water?

Starting point is 00:01:59 Yeah. That you have to keep drinking it otherwise you die. Nope. No, what is it? Nanos. This is Nanopure. You're telling me there's no nanos. There's no nanos. Nope. No, what is it? Nannos. This is Nannopure. You're telling me there's no Nannos. There's no Nannos.

Starting point is 00:02:07 It sounds like we're doing a plug for this stuff. No, no, no, no. And we talked about this on the other episode. Can I just say another thing? Please. Whenever time I've drinking water, I went, there's something wrong with this. You know what?

Starting point is 00:02:20 It's structured differently than it should be. Restructured. You're telling me this is fully structured. Yeah, yeah. You guys are not the thing. Right? Yeah. What do you love about water?

Starting point is 00:02:32 What it has? It keeps me alive. No, no, there's elements in it. I'll tell you what. Hydrogen, oxygen. When it's oxygen in it, right? But it already has oxygen in it. But this company?

Starting point is 00:02:41 No. Not enough oxygen. Hyper. They need more oxygen. Hyper did out there. Okay, well let's take it. Let's take a second. Well here's, but I'm gonna say this.

Starting point is 00:02:49 Uh-huh. You're already closed-minded. No one, how am I- Yeah, you're closed-minded at your, at your, at your, at your use. You're fun of it already. Juice, am I closed-minded? Um, if I said no, would you be open to that possibility?

Starting point is 00:03:01 Yes. Then I think you're pretty open-minded. Right on. Be good. So would you like some of Fora, please? I would like, I'm gonna drink my own water. You drink yours now. You know what?

Starting point is 00:03:12 My good old-fashioned Elvis, Elvis Love Mountain Valley. That's why I like it. I don't drink my O Fora, because yours has full of nanos. You're telling me this has tons of nanos. Yeah, yeah, nanobots in your body, dude. Oh, it's a real classic. And you're being restructured now. Let me taste yeah

Starting point is 00:03:32 Wow, let me taste delicious How is it I'm restructured do you feel better? Did you see how? Did you see that I did do that see that, I didn't do that. I didn't do that dude. The water just did, Jesse, did you want to try? Oh no, I think that this is what I deserve. I was just stick with the plastic.

Starting point is 00:03:54 Yeah, you know what, I'll stick with my water, okay? So you think this is better. You really do think this is better. Well, look at how much is yours? The mountain valley, a couple bucks. Yeah, a couple bucks.

Starting point is 00:04:03 $30 dude. That's a $30 bottle. Yeah, so it's disgusting. It's not. But how does it taste? Does it taste better? I hate water usually. Really?

Starting point is 00:04:12 I want to keep drinking this, dude. Wow. Yeah, yeah. It's okay. If only they could flavor it like diet coke. That would be really good water. You know, can I say something? What?

Starting point is 00:04:21 And I want to offend Christians, but here I'm going to. Go ahead. All right. Yeah. Jesus come. That's how good it is. That's how good that is. If Jesus had come then.

Starting point is 00:04:33 That's what it would be. No. You know how Jesus spent a hundred dollars on that. You know how Jesus walked on water. You know Jesus walked on water. Yes. Do you think this is the water he walked on? This is it.

Starting point is 00:04:43 Oh yeah. This is Jesus water. And the other dude that split it apart? Moses. That's that water. No part of the sea. Well, I'd like you to see a video real fast. Let's show the boys, show everyone a little video here for N Studio while you sip away. Okay.

Starting point is 00:04:56 Do you notice any difference in your water? No. I mean this. Little water. Come on, get in the head. Oh My god I did taste weird Did I just tap water then Where's my

Starting point is 00:05:22 I scored a god. I was like, you know where it is? Yeah, where's it in my mouth? Is it water, it's right here? It's in there. How is that? Be honest. It tastes exactly like water that I've, no, it doesn't. It tastes the same as it is.

Starting point is 00:05:35 It doesn't. It's not in my water. No way. Keep it right. Look at that. Okay, can I say this? Can you believe, look what the boys did. They poured you something.

Starting point is 00:05:43 That is bathroom tap water. I did. Let me say something right now do do do let me say something right now Let me see some right now if I get cancer because of this it's your fucking ball. Look at him Look at that. Let's see put the sticker back on No, no, we live here. That's insane. That's insane dude. I take this away dude You know what you like tricks? You like tricks? You like tricks?

Starting point is 00:06:06 We're now gonna play tricks. All right, and I'm gonna trick you one day. And it's gonna be worse than that, I'll tell you that right. Give me your cup, I'll pour some, some of your deluxe. That's okay, I don't even trust that anymore. What do you mean, there's the $30 while? Oh here, give me some. They put it in here.

Starting point is 00:06:18 Give me some of that. In the last episode, this is like a, that's so funny. The Philippine-lican woman. Yeah, that's right. That's right, it's all in your mind. See, it's all in your mind. It's so good. It's all in your mind. So let me say something that was a good one. That was really good. And I'll tell you I tell you this man. It's what a time to trick me because I had terrible night last night. What happened? Are you trickable right now? I'm so trickable dude. Why? Well, last night, what was last night? What do you mean, what was last night? Last night was just a no- Halloween.

Starting point is 00:06:47 It was Halloween, yeah. Oh, it was. Who was it not? It was. It was. Last night was this Halloween. Yes, this trick, Halloween. Yes, this trick, Halloween.

Starting point is 00:06:55 Did you hand out any candy? No, I turn off all the lights. Mm-hmm. The front porch. Oh, I like it. So I pretend no one's there. Like a recluse. Like a recluse, right?

Starting point is 00:07:03 All right. And I just look to see if there's any lights You know some of this they have candles, you know the kids, you know me and I have safety lights. Yeah, none around So I go you know what I'm gonna sleep early tonight 440 pieces of candy I handed out yesterday 400 that's great Yeah, and I just I dressed up like Ken no the first year I think I lived in the neighborhood was the most I dressed up like Ken we we played music, we had a fog machine,

Starting point is 00:07:26 we had a little dance party on the driveway, I had music bumping and one of the dads came up to me at the end of the night and said, hey, thanks a lot for doing this. Really? And that's all that I wanted. Oh god. Yeah, because I think it's important for the kid man. I don't live in a neighborhood. I'm not saying you. I'm not saying you. You live in the Hollywood Hills. You guys do. They don't do it in the hills. They have eyes'm not saying you. You live in the Hollywood Hills. You guys do. The Hills, they don't do it in the Hills. The Hills, they have eyes. They have deep, they're deep, steep, steep.

Starting point is 00:07:50 Yeah, by the way, that's where kids go to get kidnapped up in the Hollywood Hills. Right, you're flatland. I'm in the flats, kiddo. With the Mexicans. Yes, that's exactly right. Oh shit, I shouldn't say that. B-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b- would love to handle candy, but they'd just never around. Well, they all come to my hood. So last night I go, you know what's hung on with sleep early, right? I go to bed, but I forget, get's what I forget.

Starting point is 00:08:09 It's a masturbate. No, that's true. Oh my god, I got this out of you. That's true. That is true. Yeah. He just knows. No, I told him earlier.

Starting point is 00:08:20 What did you forget to do last night? He dinner. Oh no. So you had to wake up in the middle of the night and eat something and... No, in the middle of the morning. That's just the middle of the night. I go to bed at nine.

Starting point is 00:08:30 PM. Yes. That's impossible. I try. You went to bed at nine PM. Yeah, I was that tired. No fucking way, were you sick? No.

Starting point is 00:08:40 So you went to bed at nine. I would go to bed at nine like a Christian. Hey, hey, cross off. Because I don't do the Hollywood thing. I'm more, I'm Christian a Halloween. Did you say a prayer before you go to sleep? I do, dear God. What's here?

Starting point is 00:08:50 Your little prayer. Dear God, amen. He fills in the middle. Yeah, let him do it. I let him fill the middle. Blank check. Right. It's a blank check.

Starting point is 00:08:58 Well, you know, Jesus take the wheel. Jesus take over this prayer. Yeah, finish it for me. Well, what Jesus, I should have filled it in because what he gave me was a stomach ache. All right. All right. But go to the morning. I wake up, well, you first, you know, gooner. Yeah, gooner, gooner.

Starting point is 00:09:12 You know gooner is your dog. No, I have a cat named the orange cat gooner. Yeah. Or I'm foreign the morning. If I don't put ear plugs in, I hear. You know, it's so bad. at sounds, it could be anything. No, I'm taking shit. So I'm the next fucking police academy more,

Starting point is 00:09:32 I'm Michael Winslow, dude. Hmm, they hired me, dude. Let me hear you do a garbage truck. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Okay, it's good. Pretty good. Give me another one, give me another one. Let me hear you do something.

Starting point is 00:09:44 I want this one. What me hear you do something. I What's that you when you come yes, yeah, how about about how about this You drink toilet water you lifting up a lid and drinking toilet Yes, I get it. Thank you. it's some good. You're very good. Anyway, I hear, right, it's Guner's trying to get in my room. Cat scratch fever. Yeah, yeah. Which I wake up and I go, oh, Guner's trying to get it,

Starting point is 00:10:14 and also I'm hungry. Why don't you just leave the door open for Guner? I can't. Why? Because I have zoomies. Because they run around the room. Yeah, cats at night, that's their time. Yeah. So they just zoom, zoom, zoom all over the room. Yeah, cats at night, that's their time. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:10:25 So they just zoom, zoom, all over the bed and stuff, right? What's the matter? Just like another case to not have cats. It's just like all the things. It's fine. They poop inside, they zoom in the middle of the night. Right, for door, you don't want to be pet, you can take them on a walk,

Starting point is 00:10:38 they're no fun to play with. Yeah, anyway, so I wake up and I go, oh, fuck, I'm hungry. I'm not gonna be able to go back to bed. So I had one thing in the fridge and guess what it was. Kim Chi, I have that already. That's a given. I feel like, what is it, dude?

Starting point is 00:10:53 Turk. I'm gonna say tur. Turts. Turts. You have packed turds again? Just turds. Tur and chips. Tur, turkey chicken.

Starting point is 00:11:02 No. Tur, turkey chicken. Almost. Tur, turkey sausage. Tur, turkey chips. Tur, turkey chips. Oh, potato chips, man. Turkey chicken Turkey chicken Turkey chicken almost Turkey sausage Turkey Turkey chips. Oh potato chips man. Turkey. Cheese. Chili. Turkey. Chili. Yeah, we were way off. Turkey. Chili. Turkey. And I had one of those from Air one. Yeah, well another $50. Yeah, $50. But it's been there forever. Right. But how long you think it could be there forever. Right, but it's so long you think. It could be a year. Oh, a whole year.

Starting point is 00:11:28 It could be, I don't know. You had some bad chili. Dude, I don't know. You're crazy. I'm crazy, so I put it up all, I microwave it, right? And then I eat it all. I go out hungry still.

Starting point is 00:11:39 And I remember the other night, I got a big gigantic pint of dryers, rocky road ice cream. Bryers or dryers? Beer D, big difference. Bryers? It's a, you choose, I don't know. I think bryers.

Starting point is 00:11:52 I had myself some jennies before I came here. Delicious. The best. Yeah. But I'm lactose. Anyway, I eat half of it. You think you're lactose intolerant or is it just because you eat stuff like a year old

Starting point is 00:12:02 turkey chicken? That's what you have a bad stomach. I don't know, dude. And then I go, I feel fine. So I go, you know what, I'm not sleepy yet. So I play it maybe two hours of this game, Starfield. Okay. But I lock them up.

Starting point is 00:12:20 That's cool because when I play Starfield, I have my headphones. I can't hear gooner scratching, right? And you're in the house alone. I'm so alone, dude. That's a big when I play Starfield I have my headphones. I can't hear Gunnar scratching, right? And you're in the house alone. I'm so alone, dude. That's a big house to be alone. I'm so alone. And then it started. The shits, the eggs, the shits.

Starting point is 00:12:34 First egg. The shits are here, the shits are here. Come bring out of your mouth and your ears. The shits are here, the shits are here. It was an eggie, I don't know if you're a nose. It live in fear. But I didn't go to the bathroom. I didn't go to the bathroom. I went to bed. Oh

Starting point is 00:12:47 That's when the trouble starts. No You couldn't you're gonna start sound effects to yeah always happen. Yeah, since you've met me. Yeah Drinking more toilet water. Yeah You know that sounds like a blue whale's breast in the in the water. Yeah, if you're seeing a blue whale Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, there we go. That's what it feels like.

Starting point is 00:13:07 It's what it sounds like to me. Am I dead on? Blue whale. So anyway, a blue whale strip club. But I could, I was, blue whale. Yeah. What?

Starting point is 00:13:17 Let me get the bet out. No, I was thinking that'd be a great strip. The blue whale. Just any whale. Stripping. Just a big, just a big. How big the blue whale. Just any whale. Stripping. Just a big, just a big. How big the blue whale's big. So the strip club's gotta be.

Starting point is 00:13:29 Oh. Oh my gosh. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And do they like, you know what they like? They don't like money. Whales? They like fish.

Starting point is 00:13:39 No. Whenever I go to a whale strip club, you gotta bring plenty of plankton. Plankton. Plankton. You gotta dry it out though, because it's hard to throw on stage when they're wet. But anyway, my point is,

Starting point is 00:13:50 my point is, I only suffer like an hour, and then I had to get up early to go to my A meeting, and then I did a podcast with Logic, and I was in traffic, because he was all in Pacific Policies, and then I canceled my spot, and I got here, and I'm so tired, and I asked you, you had the energy to do this.

Starting point is 00:14:07 I got it today. Good, so I'm so glad that you have it. I gotta tell you, one of the weirdest costumes I saw last night, and I didn't get a photo of it because I felt like it would be weird to take a picture of somebody's kid, but we saw a lot of good ones. I saw a lot of good ones.

Starting point is 00:14:19 At the door. That came to my house, yeah. And the funniest one, by far. And it was mostly Mexican families that come to the hood. Yeah. It was a girl. I'm not making this up. I swear to God.

Starting point is 00:14:31 There we go. Something racist. She was a washing machine. I swear to God on my life. I was losing my shit. Yes. I was dying. And on top of her, they built a box,

Starting point is 00:14:42 like they used a car bar box to make a washing machine. Yeah. And on top of it was like woolite and bounce sheets. Wow. I swear to God. I swear to God. And the middle moved. It was one of the coolest costumes I think I've ever seen. But also it's like,

Starting point is 00:14:55 would you just take it from work or something? Well, do you write what you know you live with a car? Did she have a dryer with her? No, her sister was a fence and her dad kept leaping over her back and forth and back and forth. That's insane. No, but really the washing machine is not fake. That was actually a real costume. And it was like the best one of the night. So I gave her way more candy. You know what I don't do? Yeah. If you come up with a shit costume. Yeah. Like especially when like a 14 year old comes, you know, when

Starting point is 00:15:23 the older ones come, you're getting one, get the fuck outta here. Get the fuck outta here. You get one, you didn't put any effort into it. And you're too old. When the kids come, little kids, they're getting handfuls. I literally go like this to the kids because they're so cute and sweet. But when a grown kid comes,

Starting point is 00:15:39 they don't even say anything, just put the bag out, fucking, you know what I gave them? Woppers. Whoa. The worst, little woppers. I know what I gave him? What? Woppers. Whoa. The worst, little woppers. I know what a woppers do. The worst candy.

Starting point is 00:15:48 That's a sh- I thought it was a hamburger. Yeah, I give him hamburger. I give him a full hamburger. Oh, my god. It does, okay. But woppers were for the teenagers that didn't dress up. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:15:58 But the kids, you know what the kids got? What? They got the Reese's Snickers combo. Oh. You know what I'm talking about? No. Dude, they make the peanut butter snack. They explain it to me. Reese's makes peanut butter Snickers combo. Oh, you don't talk about? No. Dude, they make the peanut butter snack. They explain it to me.

Starting point is 00:16:07 Reese's makes peanut butter Snickers combo now. Okay, so let me ask a question though. Please, yeah. Don't even Google it, don't Google it because I want to imagine it in my mind, okay? So it's a round circle. It's a egg, oval like an egg. What?

Starting point is 00:16:22 Yeah, it's oval, oval. It's an oval like an egg, shaped like an egg then. It's not thick like an egg, but it's almost like flat, a flat, oval. like an egg. What? Yeah, it's oval, oval, oval. It's an oval like an egg, shaped like an egg then. It's not thick like an egg, but it's almost like flat, a flat, a flat egg. Yeah. And so when I bite into it, instead of having a peanut buttery nugget. No, no, friend, you do get a peanut buttery nugget, but you also get caramel and you get and cut and not. Holy shit, dude.

Starting point is 00:16:43 Uh-huh. So the good kids, the cool kids that dressed up, they're definitely getting one of those. Plus a kit cat and they're also getting there was little tiny red vines. They got all the goods. But if you were a teenager and you didn't dress up, you get a wapper, get out of here.

Starting point is 00:16:57 It's so easy. You know, like sometimes I'm Halloween, I do a two for one when I dress up. I could be one or the other. Right. So sometimes I'm a ghost, sometimes I'm a KKK member. I get it. You know what I mean?

Starting point is 00:17:09 And so I can flip flop. Or a ghost and a KKK member could be just a sperm. You kind of look like a sperm. Well, that's true. That's what we all the above. You can be three things. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But we handed out a lot of candy.

Starting point is 00:17:19 It was good to see. I just, I loved it. I really do love it when the, but the guy that said thank you really meant a lot to me because we work hard to make it enjoyable for the kids because we've got a lot of Scrooge McDuck's on the neighborhood. There's no ways as good as I thought. There's no ways, what?

Starting point is 00:17:33 I'm excited. There's no ways as good as what? I mean, you just claimed to think that you have the best Halloween house. ours was one of the best for sure with no way. There's, first of all, there is music. There's fog, there's graveyard. That's what you say, I don't know. Bones all over the place. There's no way. There's first of all, there's music. There's fog. There's graveyard. That's what you say.

Starting point is 00:17:46 I don't know. Bones all over the place. There's witches that are hanging around. Dude, I we go to the house. That was at your house weeks ago, and there was nothing there like that. Yeah, weeks ago we weren't prepared. Okay, okay.

Starting point is 00:17:55 I don't want to challenge you. I just, you don't do anything. So who are you to talk? You turn the lights out. I'm just saying that you could just say you have all these things, but when I was there, there was no proof of it.

Starting point is 00:18:07 That's just a garage. You weren't there on Halloween. Like all getting ready to get that going. There's no fog machine. You weren't there. There's a fog machine on the night. Look what I did, you know what I mean? That's like nothing.

Starting point is 00:18:19 As far as I'm concerned. You weren't there. And what did you do? Nothing. But I admit it, I don't go, hey, you guys, I had a fucking hunt in the house, I had a fucking, a gargoyle, all that stuff. If you, if you did, you would, you fuckhead. I put it together. So yeah, that's what I did. But I'm not the best in the neighborhood. I'm sorry. You're just angry because you don't have the fucking guts to do it. To go out on an emotional limb.

Starting point is 00:18:37 I don't have kids that come to my fucking house over the hills. And that's exactly who you are. Yeah, a fake. Steve Crelton of the next living place. And Steve Rich guy. I look at Steve Crelton. They know I'm are. Yeah, a fake. Steve Crelton of the next live streaming. And Steve Rich guy. I look at Steve Crelton. They know I'm nothing like that. All he had in his house was old chili, turkey chili.

Starting point is 00:18:50 He'd be scooping it in to get back. It's a blessing. Yeah, dude. You want old air one turkey chili, dude? I started the documentary about Mr. Chow. I don't know if you know his story. Maybe one of the saddest stories I've ever heard of him. He's still alive. what do you mean?

Starting point is 00:19:05 I just saw him. His story is insanely sad, I'm telling you. Oh, let me say it gas. Go ahead. He was Chinese. Correct, he's Chinese. Came here. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:19:13 Oh, I have no money. I make one ton. And it became famous. Not even close. I'll get to know me. His, I'm spoiler alert for the Mr. Chow documentary on HBO. But it's pretty incredible. This guy got shipped away to boarding school

Starting point is 00:19:27 when he was a kid. His dad was like a famous, a famous theater actor, stage actor, pretty rare for the times. Choyang Son. Choyang Son. Choyang skin. Ne. Whoa.

Starting point is 00:19:38 Yeah, his brother brother. Big fan of his movies. And then his sister wanted to be an actor and it was so, just as rare for the time, especially for Chinese people, because you know the roles, you talk about it and your standup act, you know, racist Hollywood. Every role was like, oh, I do it all wrongly.

Starting point is 00:19:52 You know, like that was every role he ever got. Yeah, yeah. And so when he moved to London and was started to get in film, was in popular films as he grew, he had in Tennessee's mother forever, couldn't see his mom, because his mom was back in China. And anybody but the time that went against the Chinese government.

Starting point is 00:20:08 I don't even say because his eyes were so slanting. Well, that's true. And anybody back against the Chinese government was blacklisted and killed. So both of his parents really parents were murdered. Yeah. You knew also murdered Brandon Lee. Yeah, Bruce Lee son. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:20:23 Well, that was on accident. No, it was on accident. No, I did. You think that had a tie to rust and that whole thing. No, you think that was a reprise of of branded Lee rust Simon Chao, you know, is he was a producer of Bruce Lee movies back in the day. And there's a conspiracy theory that he had he had he had Brandon Lee killed killed killed and the sister's been in hiding because maybe she's next anyway, let's move on. Charles parents were murdered. Yeah, amazing. Army of sauce. So sad. Then his then his wife, because of the shock of the murder of his parents, him and his wife start to disconnect. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:21:02 And she goes steps out in the marriage. And when she comes back, she's dying of AIDS in St. Don't be let, that's 100% the truth. His wife died of fucking AIDS. Yeah. After she stepped out in the marriage because he was disappearing because he couldn't, he couldn't deal

Starting point is 00:21:19 with the loss of his parents. Yeah. So then he moved and started to really do the restaurant here in LA, because it started in... Wow, I wanna watch the documentary. It's crazy, dude, it's in in the kitchen. Because I ran into him one time at the store. And I'm not lying.

Starting point is 00:21:34 I knew he was, he was in the Mitzi's bucket seat. I don't know how he got there, but in the bucket seat. Probably because he's Mr. Chow. He has Mr. Chow. I get, he grows to me. And he goes, it didn't make me talk to you. Kicks me outside and he goes, come to my wedding. I go, wait, tomato.

Starting point is 00:21:47 What? I go, I don't fucking know you. Gotta go to his wedding. I never went. Should have gone. And I have a photo on my Instagram if you don't wanna believe me, that was that night. Come Mr. Chow.

Starting point is 00:21:55 Yeah, anyway, and the best part. Have you been there? No, I've never been there, but I've seen that picture of you with him. Yeah, yeah. What's your favorite Chinese dish? It's, I do. Pop three. Kung-Po chicken in orange trick in and I know it's like whatever but fried rice. Yeah, it's great.

Starting point is 00:22:10 Fried rice. I know you were gonna give me some about that but I love it. What did you want to fried rice? Peeking duck. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, beef. You know what I mean, there's what? Aren't these all the white ones anyway? Is it an aunties because of us? No. When you go to China, they eat that? No, this is all white people. My favorite is, because it's got a little bit of your people in it. Guess what it is. Oh, uh,

Starting point is 00:22:37 Twaibos French Charros. No. That's it. That's it. That's it. Yeah, that's good. What is it? Mouschou pork? That's it. Yeah, Mouschou. I said, yeah, that was good. What is it?

Starting point is 00:22:46 Moushupork? That's it. Yeah, Moushupork. Why, why, why, why? Cause it's kind of like a taco. A breito. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, exactly.

Starting point is 00:22:54 Do you like it? Of course. And that's the only time I like plumsauce is in Moushupork. I don't like it in any other area. Well, now that we're stuck on some Asian stuff, tell me about everything. I wanna play you something, and I want you to close your eyes for a second.

Starting point is 00:23:10 Oh, is it Asian music? It is Asian music. Okay, go ahead. I'll tell you what it is. And it's amazing. Morgan and Morgan. I'm gonna car accident. Are you okay?

Starting point is 00:23:20 Are you okay? Kurt, I don't know what to do. Call Morgan and Morgan. That's exactly, obviously, how you have to do that. Clearly. God, if you're ever injured, guys, you could check out Morgan and Morgan. Man, you got hurt from that car. I know this.

Starting point is 00:23:32 It gave you a cough. 35% of all fatal accidents occur between 6 p.m. and midnight and we're all driving around at night, coming home from work, going to get food, going to see our family and friends. And I gotta tell you, when you get into an accident, it upends your life in a way that is such a bummer. Who do you turn to? Do they have insurance? Are you going to be okay? Is there so how much damage has been done? And Morgan and Morgan

Starting point is 00:23:53 as America's largest injury law firm, they have earned a hundred offices nationwide, more than 800 total lawyers with over 15 billion dollars. Get this recovered for over 300,000 clients. Morgan Morgan has a proven track record of fighting to get you full and fair compensation. Yeah, that's the deal. When I got hit in my neighborhood, I wish I had Morgan Morgan at the time years ago because we didn't know who to turn to

Starting point is 00:24:15 and the person that hit us didn't have insurance and submitting an injury claim with Morgan Morgan is so easy. If you're ever injured, you can check out Morgan and Morgan guys. Their fee is free unless they win I'm gonna deal that's so more information go for the people dot com slash bad friends or dial pound law pound five to nine from your cell phone That's for F.O.R. The people dot com slash bad friends or pound law upon five to nine from yourself Is it paid ever to have a morgan or Morgan Morgan room?

Starting point is 00:24:40 Remember you guys I just got a family member a a car from Vroom, and they're very, very excited about it. We all know, and listen up, guys, we all know how much a hassle buying a car can. I hate buying cars. You can spend so much time driving around, trying to find the perfect car, negotiating over the price, and worrying about the quality of the vehicle.

Starting point is 00:24:58 But not anymore, thanks to Vroom, guys, Vroom is the better way to buy and sell used cars. When you go to Vroom.com, you can shop thousands of cars right from your phone. They have all the popular makes and models, no haggle pricing, so you know you're getting a good deal. And the best of all, they'll deliver your ride directly to you. You don't got to go anywhere, man. They stand by their vehicles.

Starting point is 00:25:16 And the best part is, you have seven days or 250 miles, whichever comes first, to make sure it's the car for you. And if you don't like it, you can return it right back to room. This is amazing. They've helped out Bobby. He got someone he loves a car. And how simple was it to do it from the car for you. And if you don't like it, you can return it right back to room. This is amazing. They've helped that Bobby. He got someone he loves a car and how simple was it to do it from the comfort of your own cow. It's so easy. So whether it's buying your next car guys selling or trading in your current one,

Starting point is 00:25:34 room has you covered. Start shopping today at room.com. That's room.com. calm I knew what it is I'm loud, man, too fly, and you go away from us. I did my best, you're wrong. There's nothing to own your strength and chose. Okay. I know it is. My brother. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:26:15 Who's it about? My mom. It's a great song. He goes, he's probably gonna cry. It was great. I saw you almost cry a little bit. Yeah, it also um... Great song.

Starting point is 00:26:24 That's off. Stevie Wiebie's new album. He sent it to me today. Yeah. And pretty beautiful relationship I have with the Lee family that his he would send it to me and not you to promote on the show. Can you show there's a debauch on bad friends? He can't text you, but he'll text me, but his new album is available now. It's really good. And it's on what? It's on it's it's on Spotify. No, what good. And it's on what? It's on, it's on. It's on Spotify. No, what's it called? Bandcamp. Bandcamp, that's on Bandcamp.

Starting point is 00:26:49 And the link will be in the description for all the fans. Please support our Lee family. It's actually some, there's some bangers on there. What's that track called again? It's for his mom. It's called Oma. Jige, it's Kim Jige, which is a soup.

Starting point is 00:27:01 So, your mama's soup. Yeah, yeah, basically. Oh, that's awesome. That's so awesome. I remember talking to him like, almost a year ago and he wanted to make more music and get back into it. And so now the Tse is all albums out.

Starting point is 00:27:11 It's really cool. There's TbWeBee Lee, that's Bobby's brother's new music, new album out. Go check it out on band camp, very good. Isn't that nice? Can you connect with your brother a little bit through music? You don't talk, do you talk to him about this stuff, ever? Well, you know, him and I, you know,

Starting point is 00:27:28 we're both musically inclined. My brother took a different direction musically. Hmm. And, um, we'd be like, he'd more of hip hop vibe. Yeah, more hip hop vibe because, you know, I didn't grow up with, he, for some reason, in his class, he hung out with a lot of block dudes. But my class, we didn't have any.

Starting point is 00:27:45 Oh, they weren't accepted by you and you're... No, we had one guy, I forgot his name, I think it was Steve Havi or something, not Harvey. Steve Harvey. Steve Harvey. I gotta tell you, that guy's good and well. I've got his name. I forgot this guy's name.

Starting point is 00:27:55 Show me power. But he stole, I remember he stole my he-man. And never gave it back. Why is that gonna be a black guy stealing something story? Why, you couldn't have... No, I know, that's my thing. That's the only story. You remember from him?

Starting point is 00:28:06 Yeah, he stole my he-man's. Multiple, you had multiple he-man? Well, I had Skeletory he-man, all the other characters. Oh, yeah. Well, you're probably a little ritual brat. I was stole from you, too. And he wouldn't give him back. I'm like, come on Steve Harvey.

Starting point is 00:28:18 I've got his name. You have a little mustache back then. Yeah, yeah. But my point is, and then my brother had, you know, a crew and they listened to hip hop. And the only influence I had was my cousin Paul would tell me about the velvet underground or other bands, you know what I mean. And so that's my influence. But I wish I had more of a hip hop vibe, but, you know, I don't. Oh, it's okay. And I apologize. Have you checked in on your mom since we've done the therapy sessions, by the way? We text

Starting point is 00:28:43 every night. So I haven't called her physically now. Is she still going? Yeah. Is she happy with it? I haven't gotten the details, but she still likes it. She said, that's great. I don't want to dive into it because I don't want to get involved. It's not the results aren't up to me.

Starting point is 00:28:58 No, I understand. I'm just saying, but it's good to know if she's happy going. If she goes and she likes it, God bless. God bless. But, you know, the she likes it, God bless. God bless. But, you know, the results aren't up to me. And so, just like your addiction, you have to let, it's not up to you, right? And my career, it's not up to you.

Starting point is 00:29:14 It isn't up to me. You just try your best and see what unfolds. And guess what, guys? It's unfolded very good, my life. Very well. 52 years old. Just see, you know, Monday night I went to dinner with a bunch of Korean actors and stuff. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:29:30 They were on fire. You, but physically. Yeah, and I was like putting water on them. That's a weird dinner. What? They were protesting. Oh, wow, yeah. Well, yeah, just like in the Vietnam War,

Starting point is 00:29:41 those monks, yeah, they, we had dinner on these. They just lit themselves on fire. I'm like, cool dinner party. Yeah, and there was no point of it. I'm like, what do War, those monks, yeah, they were dinner on these lithus of on fire. I'm like cool dinner party. Yeah, yeah. And there was no point of it. I'm like, what's the cause? Like we don't know. You're like, I'll get the check.

Starting point is 00:29:51 Yeah. These guys are just holding the fire. I go just kidding the heat. But my point is, is that I was with some at dinner with a bunch of young Asians in the business. Yeah. And they're all like talking about their deals. You know, all the great things are happening in their lives. I was like, I'm just so proud. Do they have a group? They don't have that. They don't have a goal plaque from YouTube.

Starting point is 00:30:07 No, they have Oscar. But my point is, no, they don't have. Nobody there has to know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

Starting point is 00:30:16 I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

Starting point is 00:30:24 I don't know. I don't know. I don't? They don't have that. They don't have a gold plaque from YouTube? No, they have Oscar. But my point is, no, they don't have it. Nobody there has to know. No, no, they don't. But they, you know, they're doing their own thing and I'm like, you know, I'm just kind of watch, because you know, when I started,

Starting point is 00:30:37 there was no opportunity. It was so fucking hard. Here we go. But, you know, with them, it's... And it was so easy for me. That was the difference, I think. It was a cakewalk for everybody else. I'm not doing that right now, dude.

Starting point is 00:30:48 Now, don't roll your fucking eyes. You know you used to do that? Mr. Ferguson used to do that. My fucking biology teacher. Every time we would ask me a question in fucking high school, and I didn't know, I never knew that he was Roller's Eyes. You asked a question, he would... No, he would always, because I was always doing something. Stupid. Well, I don't know, I never knew that he was Roller's Eyes. You asked a question, he was- No, he would always, cause I was always doing something.

Starting point is 00:31:06 Stupid. Well, I don't know, but he'd be just like, you know, Mr. Lee, you know, me, what is the, you know, the mineral sign, whatever it is. The mineral sign, or for a- I could see why he rolled his eyes. Right, I'd be like, I don't know, man, you mean the metrics? He's like, what don't know, man, you mean the metrics?

Starting point is 00:31:27 He's like, what are you talking about? Metrics, it's not math. I go, you know, but the square, you know what I mean? He's like, it's pie, the pie. The pie square. Yeah, and he's like, no, anyway, he rolled his eyes. And I used to be like, you piece of shit, dude. Look at him, how worthy is he dead? I don't know, but I get out of Ferguson.

Starting point is 00:31:43 When I get out of here, man. I want to find you dog And my gouges eyes out with a fucking skillet. That's guy. Yeah, I like this skillet skillet is not Yeah skillet Harden wood to cut someone's eyes out with a skillet. I know but he'd be painful for both of But yeah, so don't really rise that me. That's my thing don't do it I'll roll my eyes at you. Yeah, yeah, but yeah, so don't really rise that mean that's my thing Don't do it I'll roll my eyes at you. Yeah, watch watch Halloween A couple of cobwebs I was a feel man

Starting point is 00:32:22 I think you're in security bleeds. Blopper. Yeah, it's sad. Blopper is so sad. It's what you're doing to it. You're a little hot. Annie, I was so great with your turkey chili. The fat sad boot on the stairs. Yeah. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:32:35 Yeah, okay. Yeah, all right. Fucking bitch. Fucking bitch, dude. And bitch asked for a lot of you though, man. I love you, dog. It's so fun. So fun on the road.

Starting point is 00:32:43 You know, so fun. It has been really fun fun on the road, you know, so fun. It has been rude We've had some really fun times on the road Was the last place we played we played Denver great great, and then we get we got Chicago Milwaukee and Madison and Minneapolis Yeah, great great when we're done. We're going to the coldest places in the cold and the worst time. Yeah, although you know, you're gonna meet Dan Dan rather from CBS news. Yeah, how do you know him? He meet Dan. Dan Rather from CBS News. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:33:06 How do you know him? He's like, we follow each other on Etsy. Dude, you're like Theo Vaughn today. I know, not. You're like taking things or else they don't belong together. No, we both create things on Etsy. We trade. Oh, you follow each other on Etsy.

Starting point is 00:33:20 Yeah. What do you make on Etsy? Mittens. You're a Mittenguy. Yeah. Mitt and Babu. So no fingers. Midden. There's so stiff though. Yeah. Right. And so not warm. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:33:32 And don't wear them around pandas. But what does he make? Dan Rather on Etsy. Oh, he makes these. Um, so you know how he loves to talk on the mic. Yeah. He makes it out of, um, you know, um, linen. Good. You talk on the mic. Yeah. He makes it out of, you know, linen. Good, you got it. Yeah, yeah. Linen swabs. He makes linen microphones?

Starting point is 00:33:51 Yeah. And you know the tips of the Q-tip? Do I? Yeah. Cotton? That's not really cotton. Is it not? What's on the tip of a Q-tip?

Starting point is 00:34:01 Q. Oh, it's just a bunch of Q. Yeah. What do you think the tip of a Q tip? Q. Oh, it's just a bunch of Q. Yeah. What do you think the tip? Dude, the tip of it's Q. So that's a bunch of Q woven up? Yeah, man. Oh, well.

Starting point is 00:34:13 You don't know the difference between Q and Kotlandet. What is it? Well, I don't know. And that's why it's like mysterious. It's like Q like in Star Trek, next generation, there was a character named Q. And he was like sort of like this character that, next generation, there was a character named Q, and he was like sort of like this character that he was sort of like God, he came in and up

Starting point is 00:34:29 and no one could really describe what he was. That's a Q tip. So that's what the Q tip is named after the Q from. Q is a mystery, you know, first of all, isn't that a mystery letter? Q? Yeah. Why? There's not a lot of words with Q in it.

Starting point is 00:34:43 No, he's saying why is a mystery letter. Saying why is a mystery letter? That's a good, another one. There's two of them. How many words start with a letter Q? Question, coil, go. Queen, quince. Quagmire.

Starting point is 00:34:55 Quagmire. Quif. 975 words start with a letter Q. That's not good. Quadruple. Now, quaff, quaff. How many words start with B? L less. Wow. That can't be right. How many words start with B? L less

Starting point is 00:35:05 Wow, that can't be right. How many words start with B? What is how does say? It's pretty interesting Yeah, 890 less word start with B than Q. We learned so that's the way dude pretty impressive What's the probably isn't a lot of words that start with what I think they start to have well how many yeah What do you think what what letter has the most, what letter? Let me say, I can't even think of 20 words, I'll start with B. 20 words? Yeah. No, you know it.

Starting point is 00:35:32 B? Yeah. And have to think that. Let's do it right now, ready? You go one, I go one, you go one. Oh, and whoever stops. Yeah. Okay.

Starting point is 00:35:39 Go. Buffoon. Bumbastic. Burrito. Bukay. Below. Beef. Bark. Busy. Bussie. Bastic Burrito Bouquet Below Beef Bark Busy

Starting point is 00:35:47 Bussy Yeah, a pussy, that's a new term that's in the dictionary now Okay Yeah, it's a male pussy Really? You don't know about this? You can do urban stuff Why couldn't we?

Starting point is 00:35:56 We have an urban audience now Oh, go ahead Balls Bouya Black Bounce Barcuda Baracuda is good Is it Baracuda at one? Yeah, Baracuda is good fish right? It is a fish. Yeah

Starting point is 00:36:10 Beacon bamboo'sle Ben she Boudrey bent black. I said black you then Bruce lock Bruce lock then What are we going this way now? What blah blah blah? Bruce. Block then. Block. What? Are we going this way now? Here we go. What? Block. Block? Block.

Starting point is 00:36:28 The LAH. Blood. Oh, blood. Blocked? What do you say? Forget it. Forget it. Forget it.

Starting point is 00:36:36 Forget this game, man. We did it. We did it. We did it. We did it. We did it more. That was at least 898. Now let's see if we can do Q.

Starting point is 00:36:44 Because Q attack only has more. I can't do it. Let's do it. Go. Queen, you already said it. Quail. Quagmire. Question. Quince. Q tip. Qualify. Qua.

Starting point is 00:36:56 I don't know. I got no one. Queen quandry. I have no idea. Quantify. Quantify. Quality. Question. Hmm. Quaint. Quaint. I don't know idea quantify quantity Question

Starting point is 00:37:06 Quaint Quaint Quick Quack Quill Oh Quit Oh

Starting point is 00:37:26 Wow I'm out. Yeah. So we know a guy who met somebody on a sad and way above, you know, I mean his pay grade. She's the most famous person I think we, no, anyone knows. Yeah, she's, and you know, you know, this is when he was single.

Starting point is 00:37:42 Yeah, it was long, long time ago. And she lived up on the hills. Well, she's multiple houses, was single. Yeah, it was long, long time ago. And she lived up on the hills. Well, she's multiple houses, but yeah. Yeah, yeah. And later at night, we would see him walk down the hill, right, with his face just, just, just a fucking, Pussified.

Starting point is 00:37:58 Puss, Puss juice. Pussified. Famous celebrity Puss juice. All over his face. And he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he Pussify famous celebrity Pustus all over his face and he can feel you look confused and gratified Happy happy I remember the night we took a walk and talk we smoked a joint in my neighborhood and he told me about the who it was And I and I it did make me think for a second are all my friends gonna date famous people all right

Starting point is 00:38:20 Like it made me go. Oh my god. I also he's not a normal thing. You can do that. Yeah, that's what you never think you can do that. I thought that, but you can do it if they let you. You can. What they never let me. I think you could. Well, I never got like, you know, I had dinner with Kate Blanchett once. I never got the vibe.

Starting point is 00:38:38 Kate Blanchett went to dinner with you. On a date? Or on a movie. But I did a movie. Oh, you were shooting a film. Yeah, and at night she was like Well, let's go take out the who cast out the dinner and I was sat next to her at dinner But you were there with like 20 other people. Yeah, Jamie Lee Curtis all these people were there. That's not the same thing

Starting point is 00:38:55 And I was sitting there and in my mind. I'm like if she did I would do it if she made a move Yeah, yeah, if Cape Lanchett made a move what would you watch your move? Look at I'm clipped. I'm Kate. No, no, no, please bring me a photo of her so I can play her please Just so I can get in character. No, I know though. I don't want to get in trouble here. She's British, right? Yeah, yeah She's the nicest person I ever met Bobby Yeah, that's dead on what do you what will you be ordering? Me, you know, I'm sober so I'll get. Yeah, that's dead on. What will you be ordering? Me, you know, I'm sober, so I'll get a die coke.

Starting point is 00:39:29 Okay, die coke for the little one. And I'll, what would you be having? I'll have a gin and tummy. Oh, that's nice, a good choice. If you mind if I drink in front of you. I don't mind at all. Do you mind if I have a drink while you're looking my toes later?

Starting point is 00:39:44 I'm hitting you, Robert. Here? Under the table, you go. I have a drink while you're looking my toes later? I'm here. You're here? Under the table. You go. I would do it. You could go right under the table. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. If she said right in front of all those people, Oh yeah.

Starting point is 00:39:52 Why would you kissing? You know, improv. Always agree. Well, I mean, you did have you done movies with before you're married with famous people when you were single. No, I still don't do movies with famous people. Kevin Hart's not famous? No, but that's now, that was only a couple of years ago.

Starting point is 00:40:09 No, I never got a big movie. I never got to do anything with the only people that I got to work with that- Who's the biggest actor you've worked with? In my life? Yeah. Cause you just did John Cena. Tom Arnold.

Starting point is 00:40:22 That's not even fucking, I've done Tom Arnold. Tom Arnold. I've done Tom Arnold. Who's the biggest I ever I've done Tom Arnold. Tom Arnold. I've done Tom Arnold. Who's the biggest I ever work in? Melissa Leo when I did, I mean, she's an Oscar. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, huge. And she would not hook up with me. Mark Walberg.

Starting point is 00:40:36 Whoa. Yeah, because I was in the wardrobe department on Transformers 5. And I delivered him his shoe inserts. Whoa, was he nice? How big are they? Really nice. How big are they? They were not like padding, but just like comforts. Yeah, but you were the 10th person to give him one.

Starting point is 00:40:50 Yeah, that's right. They were stack them up. I didn't want to say it. Cause it was like kind of shy about that. He was really nice to give him out of his like trailer. Mark Wahlberg, you know what I mean? Hit on you, would you? Yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:41:03 Even now. Well, wait, why you say even now? No, he's older, I mean, hit on you, would you? Yeah, yeah. Even now. Well, wait, why are you saying even now? No, he's older, I mean, I don't know. Older? He's one of those like ageless Hollywood. All right, so if Mark Wahlberg called you on the blue, and he goes, hey baby, let me take you out in a date where you would go on a date with him.

Starting point is 00:41:17 Yeah, I would love to go on a date with Mark. And if he tried to... Why has he said something? You would make out and all that stuff with him? Maybe, I mean, I would, like, I mean, he's still a person, I'd want to. I probably, but I still want to see. What if he was like, you want to take you out of date,

Starting point is 00:41:30 but just let you know, like, I got a fuck on the first date, and it's only anal. What would you say? Oh, man. You don't do anal at first date? No. But it's my, it's me, it's my key mark. Like, yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:41:40 You know, gotta let me do it, baby girl, you gotta let me do it. Yeah. I got a fuck on the first date, and I got to get the ass. Is it You gotta let me do it. Yeah, I got a fucking the first date and I gotta get the Is it your ass or my ass? Bulls. I'll pull the I mean, I got a happening post. I'll pull a sign if you never heard of them all the Walberg way Okay, do happening for hamburger for my family's yeah, and free Walberg. I need a free Walberg for life. Yeah, all right

Starting point is 00:42:00 Good deal So let's do this thing. It was me. No, I worked with them. That was me, him and Kevin Hart. I wonder if there's a star that would hit on me and I would just go, I just can't. Like a star, like a hot starlet. Margot Robbie. No Margot Robbie. You would say no to Margot Robbie.

Starting point is 00:42:15 Too hot. What do you mean too hot? Too hot. She's, it would be like, do you get what I'm saying? Yeah, I would be there, and I'd be like, I'd look down, because that's what you do. Like in a war, right?

Starting point is 00:42:29 You know war, right? Back in the day when they had muskets, and the war's starting, right? And you have your musket, right? And you have to look down to see if all the stuff is in there. You don't really? Yeah, but I would. Okay.

Starting point is 00:42:41 Immediately dead. No, no, no, no. How did, how did privately die? I didn't like it. Shout himself in the fucking head. Did you look it down the barrel? No, no, no. I would see if everything's in like,

Starting point is 00:42:52 so I would look at my dick and go, is everything there? Is the sack there? Is the sack there? I think of Margot Robbie's with you. You'd be just fine. Saying you don't want to get with Margot Robbie. If she doesn't kiss, then no.

Starting point is 00:43:03 If she doesn't kiss. You're insane. Crazy. No, I can't get with Margot Robb. If she doesn't kiss, then no. If she doesn't kiss. You're insane. Crazy. No, I can't get, you know my thing. I know. I can't get hard, period. No, I can. Unless I know that they like me.

Starting point is 00:43:16 Blue-chew. No. Right, and so the way I know that a woman likes me if they make out. So if she feels you. And I can feel during the make-out section that they like me. Right. So then I go during the make out section that they like me, right?

Starting point is 00:43:25 So then I go, okay, I'm in. But if I'm in a situation where they don't like me, I can't get aroused. I'm gonna go, so if you slap it, I don't like you. Careful. None. So what do you mean? But I bid in situations where one time,

Starting point is 00:43:42 okay, I want, what time I did this comedy club. I can't name the guy. Okay. But I guess, you know, he got, I show up at this town because I got you a woman. Got you a woman. And I go, what do you mean? I was just 1966.

Starting point is 00:43:55 Yeah, and I go, what do you mean? He's like a woman of the night. I go, who told you that I need this? Carlos. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I walked in the hotel room. There was a woman in my hotel room. Just sitting on the bed. Yeah, and she goes, hi, so and so. And I go, yeah, and then I walked in the hotel room. There was a woman in my hotel room. Whoa. Just sitting on the bed. Yeah, and she goes, hi, so and so, and I go, yeah, get out. I can't do it.

Starting point is 00:44:10 Hmm. You didn't even ask her what they paid for. No. I just can you imagine if you got like a discount package? She's like, hi, I can jerk you off, but it's with my feet. There's a girl in my soliwini does that just there. Of course know the girl. She just feet, because she doesn't want to touch it. I just need somebody to like, I have to know that they like me before I do it. Let me tell you something, saying no that you wouldn't want to go on a date with Margot Robbie because she's too hot

Starting point is 00:44:33 is like saying, I don't want to ride down a mountain on skis because it's over at some point. It's like, who the fuck cares? Yes, it's a quick ride. Margot Robbie, what if they don't want to, what if they don't want to go down to the mountain? Down to the mountain on skis. No, she's letting you ride down the mountain

Starting point is 00:44:44 but you're like, it's going to be over at some point. What if you don't like skiing? Then you don't like Margot what if they don't want to what if they don't want to go to the mouth down to the mountain all skis No, she's letting you ride down the mountain, but you're like it's gonna be over at some point What if you don't like skiing then you don't like Margot Robbie Bingo oh wow, yeah, mom would you I'll take a date with Margot Robbie. Are you right? I would go what? You I would go I would try if I didn't try I wouldn't know yeah, right? So it's like you know I would I would go in but But she goes, no, no, just eat my pussy. I'd just be like, okay. And then make it and then kicks you out. And then as the moment you're done, she goes, get out.

Starting point is 00:45:12 There's a new world outside. Get the fuck out. I'm making it. I don't get to come. What gross. Y'all get out. Oh, that wouldn't ask her that. I would just be an internal dialogue.

Starting point is 00:45:20 No, I know. But she heard you say it inside. She's that good. My favorite one. Yeah. Does that, my favorite one. Yeah, does that So I go And then she goes get out. Get out. Are you what are you insane? And by the way, then and then tomorrow you're gonna call her anyway Right, Margo had a great time. Yeah, I know you did loser

Starting point is 00:45:37 I wouldn't could I one can I do it again whenever the fuck I want I'll call you later. Okay, okay, whenever I'll be at 24 seven Call me anytime. Viator. That's what. You went to Bora Bora. Mm-hmm. What did I do? From my little birthday, Bobby got me a little excursion with ATVs and man, what a nice little journey.

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Starting point is 00:46:53 Not only I've been using Dr. Squatch for years and they have the best smells. And it's also sometimes you know when you get a soap like a national brand. Yeah. You don't feel like it's doing anything. You're body doesn't it's kind of gliding across your skin. Right, but Dr. Squatch, you actually a soap like a national brand. Yeah. You don't feel like it's doing anything you're body. It doesn't. It's kind of gliding across your skin. Yeah, right.

Starting point is 00:47:07 But Dr. Squat, you actually feel like you're cleaning stuff. Yeah, it gets in there, baby. It really does. Right, so what we're offering today is the B3G3, all right? The Buy 3 Get 3, baby. You buy three soaps and you get three soaps. For free, $28 off total savings, $4 a bar, new customers only, and you get three soaps for free $28 off total savings $4 a bar new customer's only and you get free shipping which is pretty incredible so these this is this has got

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Starting point is 00:48:15 You'll need to start feeling good and smelling like a man today with a genie granted you one one wish. What would it be? Okay. I was I'm well, where do you find the G? What do you find the bottle? Where do we find the genie bottle? Yeah, you find in on a beach or at the desert?

Starting point is 00:48:30 Erwin. Erwin. Do they sell genie lamps? Or I'm at Erwin. Yeah, how much do you think a wish would cost? Probably like a hundred dollars. Or a hundred. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:48:40 For Per wish? Yeah, like a hundred grand at Erwin. Yeah, I had Erwin. Yeah. Oh, if you go, literally, if you go one wish, literally, that would be cost probably 25 million. This is interesting. Does the genie, does the genie, and its lamp,

Starting point is 00:48:53 and its wish, give us, does that come from where it's located, like where the lamp is found? Like if you find it in Beverly Hills. Yeah. Does he, is he like a fancy looking genie that gives you like unlimited wishes? But if you find one in like, you know, Torrance is he like dude, you get a half a wish. I got Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got mine at Ralph's UK. Yeah, if you have a lab that you find it vans. What's a half wish?

Starting point is 00:49:14 Half wish, right? You may or it only some of it's gonna come true. Yeah. Oh, the genie's kind of lazy. My one wish My my one wish would be um That's a tough one, huh for bad friends to last forever for me and Andrew to let live forever for you and I to live forever yeah wow do you imagine the apocalypse everyone's gone everything doesn't exist except for you and I but then you have a wish and then you can make that better you could double down on our way wait imagine though I had the same wish in the Genie's, like you fucking idiot, you both with for the same thing. So we just live together.

Starting point is 00:49:50 Oh no, I be mad, I go, no pussy dude. Oh dude, I did that. I thought you did that. That was my first time. No, if we ever get a fucking wish, right? Okay, I'm gonna go me and Andrew live forever. Yeah. And your wish would be that we live forever.

Starting point is 00:50:02 No! Oh, I fucked it up again. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, we live forever. No, oh, I fucked it up again Yeah, that we get a what like I I get love her our lives would live forever too. You do a wish. I'll do one ready go. I Jeannie man call you Jeannie Yes, you may you're Sorry my eyes Whoa whoa my bad this Jeannie looks a lot different than I thought Jeannie's would look yeah Yeah, I'm you know, I'm magic so I can transform.

Starting point is 00:50:26 Cool. So anyway, my one wish is for me and Andrew to live forever. Which Andrew? Centino. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The one I do the podcast with. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do I get a wish, genie?

Starting point is 00:50:36 Um, okay, you guys live forever. What's your, uh, My wish. And you think about it. I got it. My wish is that me and my best friend Bobbie Lee live forever. What? Okay, it's done. What you guys later by it. We're doing it. No dude. I take it back. Wait, so you've been the last ones on earth. You guys are fucking right? Wish we're so old that that point wish granted

Starting point is 00:50:59 No, because there's still gonna be second words my secret wish you didn't know you know, you know what I would go I go hey, let's get this motorcycle because we'd have motorcycles. Of course we have motorcycles. Right, I go. How do we not? We gotta go to San Marcos. You know what that San Marcos?

Starting point is 00:51:12 You know what? You don't know what that San Marcos. San Marcos San Diego. Oh yeah. The real doll factory. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Starting point is 00:51:22 Oh, oh, oh, oh. Think about it. Just two best friends going. Go real doll sex doll factory and we go in there and we can put the parts But you know what will happen what we'll use them all will never clean them and then we'll run out No, we live and we got to go find another sex doll factory. This is a movie two best This is like our herald in Kumar They're trying to go to wet of white castle. We just are trying to go get sex toys So we're traveling the country going from sex toy factory to factory. We use them once, we throw them away and then we got to go find a new one.

Starting point is 00:51:51 Well, I'm sure there's about 500 of them. Well, then let's get started. And they're not one use things you can use probably one for a year. It's actually a good movie. Two best friends set out to go because of the apocalypse. Yeah. Instead of going to get food or rashes, they wanna go to the ultimate sex toy factory to have sex with the most realistic doll that's just been imported from Japan. Basically a human.

Starting point is 00:52:13 And it's a journey. That's our hailed and cum laude. That's funny. Then we get there what happens. They become real in a weird way. They kill us. Yeah, they kill us. For sure, they're hunting us in kill us.

Starting point is 00:52:22 They're the reasons why there is no more people in the world because everyone's been getting killed by sex dolls, which are inhabited by aliens. Yeah. If we're the last people on earth, once we went to the sex place, the story, I get a bunch of real dolls. I know we're joking about this, but I do. Where would you go? I do think this is coming soon.

Starting point is 00:52:38 Where would you want to go? Yeah, the end of the world. Where would I go? What? Like, if you and I are the only ones on earth, and I'm like, we gotta go to San Marcos and you'd probably go, all right Let's go I go for you. Yeah, but then what where would you want to go after that? Yeah, where's my place to go to? Yeah, I will go anywhere. I'd want you to drive a car to country me to Augusta, Nashem to go play Probably the most coveted golf course in the world

Starting point is 00:53:00 Wait, how long? Go ahead. How long do you think gasoline would be like available? It's so much, so much. It's so much, so much. We're just two people. We'd never run out. Never run out. Yeah, I don't know how to use generators to you.

Starting point is 00:53:14 Yeah, what do you mean? Please. But we need gasoline for a generator. No, but I know there's gonna be gas around, but I don't know how any of it works. I got you, baby. That's why you, that's right. Lighting?

Starting point is 00:53:23 What do you mean? How did we light up a place electricity? He means yes. Well, the grid will be down. So we'll have to use candles at night or generators. You know, Jenny's with a big light that's heavy. We might as well just use candles and loud. They're really loud. Yeah, right. And then here's what we'll do. Every house we stay in when we're done, we'll just burn it to the ground. That's all. Yeah. Oh, and can I ask you this?

Starting point is 00:53:47 Like we'll stay in LeBron James's house. Can we have like a million dogs? We'll have well, first of all, they'll be following us. We'll be the only ones finding food. Well, naturally, that's why you're not. That's why you're not the right. Yeah. You would have like hundreds of dogs following around. No cats though.

Starting point is 00:54:02 One. How they'll never stay with us. We're on the move. You don't know some of them How are we gonna carry these dogs? Are we gonna put them in a semi? We gotta get a semi truck and no backup of dogs Here's what we do then and I'm being real. Okay, nothing real. So my go we had to find one place to stay No, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll stay there. We'll stay in the greatest place on earth where Austin Texas The Santa Rosa you're gonna go Austin Texas. Yeah, the Santa Brothers. We'll go to Joe's house. Yeah, no a different Joe Joe Biden. Oh The White House. Yes, you guys got it at least one night. The White House and

Starting point is 00:54:35 we'll paint it. We'll paint it yellow. Yeah, we're gonna go we're gonna own the White we're gonna live in the White House. That's what we're gonna do. Okay, anyway Yeah, wherever we go, right? We keep the dogs there. I'll stay there with them. Fine, and I'll go on a journey. And you gotta go to Santa Marcos, get me this sextile. Oh my God. If you bring back, like, you know,

Starting point is 00:54:53 enough, the good kind, you know what's gonna happen. What? I do. Go ahead. You're, you're going to try to make Andrew be your servant. Mm-hmm. And Andrew's just gonna go off on his own.

Starting point is 00:55:05 Get you sex dolls. You're gonna have fun food because there's no Uber eats, no steak houses. Don't be silly. That's cheese right. Oh yeah. Meatball food. What are you providing? Food is all gonna go bad.

Starting point is 00:55:17 Number one, you guys are so dumb dude. Number one, okay. I can go to a Vans, right? Frozen foods out. There's no more frozen food, it's gone. Exactly, right? Vegetable, fresh, anything fresh is out. Correct, it's only canned food.

Starting point is 00:55:30 But canned food, I know how to open those. Good, yeah. You act like you can't plant. Right, I know how there's pots, right? And I know how to pour beans in a pot. Correct. And start a fire, because the lighters will be there. That's right.

Starting point is 00:55:43 Right, right, and they'll be wood. That's true. To do a bonfire. Yeah. I'm gonna start a Michelin star restaurant by myself that no one shows up to every night, but I, how about I prep like someone is gonna come? Oh, that's so sad.

Starting point is 00:55:55 And I stand outside with a towel on my arm. And I, and as just as the wind, just the language wind, I just go, care for some Italian. Yeah. And I just stand by myself, losing my mind wind, I just go, care for some Italian. Yeah. And I just stand by myself, losing my mind, but I cook like feverlessly every day. And I'll be the wine guy. You finally show up.

Starting point is 00:56:12 Yes. Like Lieutenant Dan de Forest Gump, you find this show up. I have no legs. Why did you lose your legs? Lieutenant Dan. The fire I was making beans. Lieutenant Lee let his legs on fire. I was making beans.

Starting point is 00:56:23 And I found Andrew again. He never got the sex dolls, but here we have this restaurant now. And the movie's called Lieutenant Lee's Legs. Yeah. And then you replaced your legs with the sex doll legs. Yeah. Wait, if Bobby's bottom half was a sex doll. Oh, yes, I would.

Starting point is 00:56:40 Okay. Of course, what do we even talk about at some point? Of course I would. Yeah. If your bottom half fell we even talking about at some point? Of course I would. Yeah. If your bottom half fell off and we had to put a sex doll on the bottom, how much money did Lieutenant Dan give for us for the shrimp company? What do you mean, do how much at Forest Gump

Starting point is 00:56:56 get Lieutenant Dan? Didn't Lieutenant Dan make a lot of money off of the shrimp company? Yeah, but Forest bought the boat from Bubba Gump's money. I understand that. And then like he gives money. How much money does it give for us? Well, I got about 15 boats.

Starting point is 00:57:10 Right. Because all the boats were wiped out. Yeah, never the only ones left. Right, and they made them mongers at dollars. They had ten at home. And I remember Lieutenant Dink comes to the wedding or whatever. Right.

Starting point is 00:57:21 And I know that Forest makes money from Lieutenant Dink, but I was wondering if Lieutenant Dink fucked him over a little bit. It felt like he did a little bit. Those legs were made out of the same thing that the NASA space shuttle was made out of so I didn't trust him. Yeah, that's true. When I look at movies like that, I don't like it. Taylor Tomlinson to host CBS after midnight. She's taken over for fucking James Gordon. Wow, that's a huge news.

Starting point is 00:57:42 Comedian escort the late night CBS gig. She beat out X mayo and Ricky Vales for the hosting job. The news would announce on the late show with Stephen Colbert, whose host will executive producer show, Thomson rising stand up, his release, her Netflix specials, cordial life crisis. And look at you. Congratulations to Taylor. Tom. Oh my gosh. It's our home. He's going to be now hosting. I literally when you told me that.

Starting point is 00:58:00 It gave me goosebumps at the size of coconut balls. Amazing. I mean, that's amazing. Honestly, good good for Taylor Congratulations Taylor Thompson absolutely amazing. Oh, oh comedy history. Yeah, I mean honestly that's the first female comedian to host a late night show. It's also she's a part. She's young. She's young and what is she 27? Gotta be 25 26, but you know what's so funny is that this is she's walking in the footsteps of some of the greats before because I will say Joan Rivers would do guest hosting for Johnny Carson get her own show to you, but I'm saying Joan Rivers always wanted and probably deserve to get a late night show. He did on Fox The main ones were talking. She had a main Fox one. That's why Johnny Carson was mad. You're not listening

Starting point is 00:58:40 I'm saying like the main show the late late show the late late show the tonight show You're not listening. I'm saying like the main show the late late show the late late show the tonight show Like also what our senior does what it wasn't a real thing. It was dude But it's like different category though. Yeah, you're missing what I'm saying the main network television late night shows are the ones that the fuck I'm not late. It's not man. I Don't know what you just What I was trying to say was it's impressive to be a female to lead a late night show That is one of the original network late night shows. That's huge. It's huge. It's a big fucking deal. Because Joan

Starting point is 00:59:09 Rivers and all these other people that had shows, they weren't the main shows. They weren't the late night to the tonight shows. And I love they went, you know, we're gonna go young, young. Well, she's a voice of a massive generation. Look at her audience. She sells out fucking arenas. There's a reason. She so famous. There's a reason Nate Bargazza just did fucking SNL. Yeah, but I hope they don't, it's, you know, because when you watch, you know, Fallen or any of these guys do their monologues and stuff, it just becomes so watered down and cookie cutter.

Starting point is 00:59:42 You know what I mean, there's no more edge to it, and I just wish that that she doesn't lose the magic. That's all. She's not really an edgy comedian. She's a very like she's very speaks from her own voice and her own perspective. It's going to write to her topical stuff. And I just, you know, I just hope it doesn't. I don't think it will. I think she'll do a phenomenal. She doesn't have an edge. She's not an edgy comic. She's a very like I think she's just cool though. She is, but she's a wholesome, like a, the reason they booked her on that,

Starting point is 01:00:09 is because she's receivable to an American audience. She doesn't go out of her way to talk about poop and jerking off like this show. I'm sorry. News flash, we're definitely not getting on late night anytime soon. Never. She's much more clean and concise and intelligent.

Starting point is 01:00:23 Her comedy is very, uh, it's good. And this is bullshit. It's not bullshit. This is goofball wackadoo non-sensitivity. We're about to show. So we did Denver and we've been doing guys as we're doing talent shows and because we know our fans have massive talent. We've had some pretty impressive, we had a lady that did a hawk. Not hawk. No she did a seagull. A seagull. We had a bunch of rappers.

Starting point is 01:00:49 We had a rapper in DC who was actually really good. We had a rapper in the network. The Denver was good too. We've had a lot of hidden talent fans. I think the most impressive talent was what? Let's say it on three. One, two, three. Quif.

Starting point is 01:01:03 Oh. Wait, what were you gonna say? I was gonna say, so we're doing the, she wasn't on the lineup, right? And we asked the audience, we have a lot of talented, you know, I mean,

Starting point is 01:01:13 people that signed up for the talent show and some random lady in the audience goes, I can Queen on command. And we immediately, it gets to the your attention. Yeah, I get on stage. Yeah, you gotta get on stage. Yeah, so that's, to me, I would stop, hold,

Starting point is 01:01:26 and there was 3,500 people there. Yeah. Not only could she queefe on command when she came on stage, which by the way, you know, they gave us that microphone she used. We have it here. It's encased in the front room. Why, they didn't want to use it again?

Starting point is 01:01:36 It's, it's melted. The top is, oh, I see. But this woman could queefe on beat. She, she made a beat. She could queefe with a beat. It was incredible. It was incredible It was like a golden buzzer moment like an H.E.T. like everybody Oh my god, we're sending her to the final you remember when Mo's are

Starting point is 01:01:53 Sally already I remember you remember what? Celia Such an asshole dude. Such a fucking pretentious dickhead You know what you know what you are dude? You're the kind of guy that likes $35 waterin'. Such a fucking pretentious dickhead. You know who you are dude? You're the kind of guy that likes $35 water. You're a fucking dickhead. Yeah, Salieri.

Starting point is 01:02:09 Salieri. Salieri. Salieri was a piece for the king, right? And the king is practicing because he wants to show off in front of Mozart. Right. And Mozart comes in and goes, well, I think this will be better and he made it better

Starting point is 01:02:26 That's what this lady was like you imagine Mozart comes to the room when somebody's composing something and he's just like eating something He just goes gay to whatever But he um she came in and goes hold Hold my drink hold my drink. Yeah, and watch what I can do But you know what the weirdest you can hear it go Hold my drink. Yeah, and watch what I can do. But you know what, the weirdest you can hear it go. It was incredible.

Starting point is 01:02:45 It was incredible. We can't show the video on the main page here, of course. But we have a, we have a Patreon. We're gonna show it. Go watch it on the Patreon if you want. It's on there. We can't show it on the main page. She's the rock mononof of queeth.

Starting point is 01:02:55 The rock mononof of queeth, go check it out on the Patreon because if we show it on your YouTube, we'll get mad at us again. Again. And I want to say this. I really, really, really love you. Who me? Juice. And to the fans out there that have been asking, we are an inch away from closing down a deal so we can go to Australia to perform for our fans. Sydney Perth, Adelaide, Brisbane,

Starting point is 01:03:20 Auckland, we're all over the place down on the, we're working on it right now. But in the meantime, go see us out in 2024, get the on the, we're working on it right now, but in the meantime, Go see us out in 2024, get the tickets because we're gonna be in like Atlantic City. We're gonna be in Tucson. We're gonna be Reno, Tamekia now Sacramento. So go check us out at BadFriendsPod.com for those tickets and thank you for being a bad friend. Thank you for being a bad friend. You know how I knew by the way with time you left in Denver when I walked past the hotel room, how would I know that you what you did that morning or that late that night? What do you mean? There was a cart in the hallway with all the food on it that you ordered. And I literally go, God, I knew Bobby ate last night.

Starting point is 01:04:00 We just ate dinner and I go, I bet he ate again. I lifted up the napkin and she starts cracking up. Spaghetti, steak, soup, salad. We just ate and he had so much stuff. So here's the deal. Can you never do that again? What? That's my food.

Starting point is 01:04:19 I didn't touch it. It's intrusive, it don't. You were done covered. You were done. Did I not cover my food? That's to say I'm done. It doesn't matter. It's mine. Don't look at it. I'm gonna look at it every time I'm gonna do whatever I want. I'll look at your fucking food all I want especially if you're done. You're done It's for the garbage. You're throwing it away. So yeah, can I tell you another thing then? Yeah, go ahead since we're here at this level. Yeah, let's go then I wasn't really gonna fart on your wife

Starting point is 01:04:45 Yeah, you were no, I wasn't and you acted so fucking weird on you farted on everyone in the green room You also did fart right next to her because you thought it was funny and I said don't fucking fart on her But why you so fucking weird about it because it's crazy disrespectful She did not want that to happen. Yes. She was not into it. That's not okay, she doesn't like that. Okay, but don't get that angry about it. Nobody is. Nobody is. Shut up. I'm gonna fart on your wife next to my seer.

Starting point is 01:05:08 Can you imagine he would be so fucking mad. I don't go to the fuck. Now that they have a baby, he'll kill you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway, you can do whatever you want to me. Okay, not. Well, then how about this? That's out about it.

Starting point is 01:05:19 You don't look at my food. I don't fart on your wife. I'm gonna look at your food all over my life. And I'll beat the shit out of you. And I'll beat the shit out of me. Yeah, you will. life and I'll beat the shit out of you and I'll be the shit out of me. Yeah Okay, I'll be the shit out of myself. God You get so mad about stupid things man to do something so stupid to other things you get mad about anyone You're 52 and to fart on somebody's wife is insane backstage. It's fun

Starting point is 01:05:39 It doesn't matter what stage it's on front stage back. Okay. Anyway, idiot. Fucking moron. You do fucking idiot. Take a chill pill as a 52 year old that farts on people. 50 things though, too, that you just get mad about fart on people. Yeah, nobody wants to be farted on ever. Can I tell you another thing that you got? No, I don't want to bring it up. Look at your face. Nobody wants to be farted on. Period. Look at your face. Nobody wants to be farted on. Period. I know, but it was a joke. I was really gonna do it. I had to ask my friend.

Starting point is 01:06:09 You did, you just farted, right? That's my butt. You put it on the mic. Hey, yeah. Woo! Yeah! Woo! Yeah! Woo! Yeah! Woo! Yeah! Woo!

Starting point is 01:06:29 Yeah!

Bad Friends - Magic Water & The 3rd World Genie

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