Beach Too Sandy, Water Too Wet - 10: Museums in Boise, ID

Episode Date: January 30, 2019

Welcome to episode 10 of the podcast where a couple of poorly dressed jobsworths read awful reviews. This very special episode is full of big announcements and big egos. We even answer the age old question: Which has more museums, Boise or New York City? We also discover the world of people who get excited by squirrels, making this our most wholesome episode yet. But don't get too excited, because we're still being described as "what muppets would sound like on crack." Buy our merch! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Logo by Courtney DeKorte. Theme by Mavus White.  Music by PSOVOD, Sirkoto51 and tyops.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Call 1-866-531-2600 or visit connectsontario.ca. Please play responsibly. Welcome to Beach to Sandy, Water to Wet, a podcast featuring real reviews written by people who just need the world to know what they think. need the world to know what they think. Between you and me, I wanted to like this podcast, but I'd give it zero stars if I could. Hello everybody and welcome to Oops! I have my notes for and that's why you drink open. What's that? I don't know. It's something in a different timeline in a different universe. It says cults and serial killers.

Wrong podcast. Who would listen to a podcast about those things sickos oh welcome to beach too sandy water too wet the podcast where we read one-star reviews in the most dramatic fashion i'm christine i'm alex and hello hello welcome to our 10th episode that's amazing it is we are very proud to have made it this far and thank you to everyone who has joined us in this beginning journey yes and i feel like it's only getting more and more fun yes i was saying that earlier each episode now i'm enjoying more and more when it comes like the research interacting with people online it's just still funny like it's always funny to me

yeah it doesn't get old it does not get i mean this is literally only episode 10 maybe we'll feel better worse in episode 100 but fingers crossed catch us then let us know let us know what we said yes make us feel better um hey guys so before we get started i think alexander had something to read oh yeah in honor of uh my favorite restaurant ever uh marissa wrote in a nice message on facebook and i'd like to read it. Okay. Hey guys, had a little anecdote to go along with Alex's Cracker Barrel love. I was eating at one here in Fort Worth with my family and texting my best friend at the time about it. Side note, she's Mexican.

I had told her where we were, and she thought it was a restaurant just for white people, shaped like a barrel. I had to set her straight on that one. We were in high school at the time, and I still can't believe that's what she thought. Keep up the great work, y'all. How amazing. I feel like her friend was not that far off, though. I mean, I was going to say, oh. Shaped like a barrel.

White people. I could say. That's Cracker Barrel. That's you? At a Cracker Barrel. That's you? At a Cracker Barrel. Speaking of some little redemption stories, I actually, I didn't tell you this, but I actually pulled a Waffle House review. No. I just felt a little bit like it needed a comeback.

Yeah, please. After last week. Please. So this is a five star review of the W waffle house on piedmont road in atlanta georgia from damien i know it sounds crazy but nothing insane happened the waitress was happy the waitress was happy and did a great job and the food was cooked just right no fights no crazy people throwing things no cars backing into the store just a great visit no orgies no orgies no techno dance parties at the griddle remind me to avoid that waffle house then oh that's nice though see it is possible it's possible thanks damien it's rare but it's

possible it's possible i like that um okay cool so we are gonna get into the theme and the challenge um but first we wanted to uh announce a little something yeah and it's something that we want to hear what you think it's something about it that sentence makes sound like a review right now um we just want to hear how what you guys think so let us know um we're not basically what i just said but in a much more concise okay fashion anyway we're planning on starting a patreon and when it comes to tears we have some ideas but we'd rather hear what you would be interested if anything if anything um and if not don't say mean things or do say them to alexander yeah tell me what you really think um so we have we're thinking like maybe submitting topics uh voting on the next topic or challenger theme um maybe

getting like a bonus review every month uh access to our theme song i don't know we're thinking of some other fun ideas uh so kind of how should they send us in thoughts emails anything um email maybe email probably best with patreon in the subject that would be great our email is beach to sandy at gmail.com and we'll kind of try and formulate some ideas um and obviously no pressure you don't need to donate of course this is just a fun bonus thing we're thinking of adding. Yeah, because we do want to provide extra content. Because we also have a lot of fun doing it. Exactly. And it would be great, I think, if we could get something like that started.

So let's try it. Yeah, send us your ideas. We might then put it up to a poll on Facebook. Yeah, a poll on Facebook might be. Yeah, so look out for that. Or Instagram stories. I don't know. Or Twitter. They all have polling. Oh, yeah. Poll for that. Or Instagram stories. I don't know. Or Twitter.

They all have polling. Polling places. We'll figure. Polling, yes. Hanging chads. Oh, no. Yeah, so if, you know, no pressure either way. If you guys, if everyone's like, we don't want that, then that's fine, too.

But we thought we'd throw it out there and hear what you think before we make it based on our own thoughts. Yeah, please. Please reach out. So, cool. That being said, keep an eye out for all that on our social media and we also have another announcement that we're going to make at the oh at the end of the episode right this is a big episode guys oh episode 10 so stay tuned for that we're gonna announce that and that's just for everyone that's for oh yeah that's just for everyone, not just Patreon. Oh yeah, that's for everyone. Everyone. Everyon. What? Patreon everyone?

Everyon? Yeah. Do you need a break? Yeah. Okay, so we are going to now get into the theme. The theme this week was museums in Boise, Idaho. And I gave you the challenge of finding a review of a park that was a positive review that mentioned squirrels. And I wanted it to be a review that squirrels were a positive part and not just-

Were integral to the positive review. Exactly. Yes, I understand. Oh, you seem confident that you found something. I understand. I'll just leave it at that. Leave it at that. That's coming up.

But first, let me hear what you found for museums in boise idaho okay here we go so this is um a review by alex hopefully not you because otherwise we have something to talk about oh uh of the children's museum of idaho one of my favorite places so i've written many reviews of it so it might be my odds are this is you however it is a one star so probably not you since you seem very over eager about this museum yes now to clarify you have not actually been to this museum i have i have never been to boise idaho i thought maybe on your ice trip ice fishing trips you somehow ended up there no okay there was that was minnesota this is by Alex. One star.

May I spell lame with three letters? What? May I spell... Now, please know there are three L's at the beginning of this word lame. May I spell lame with three letters just to signify my disappointment? Wait, does he clarify this? No. Was he trying to say three L's?

I think they think this is just a dig. But what does it mean by three letters? Truly, I have no idea. Okay. Okay. Why would Google even list the weird places open? Oh. Took my little kids there while visiting Boise area just to figure out the place is not open until December.

They are still building it. Why would anyone want to list it as open? And why write a positive five-star review about a place that does not yet exist? Wishful thinking? Contractors looked clean and tidy? Is it the way they do business here in boise you tell me i don't know what it means okay but i kind of agree with him about writing a five-star review about something that isn't even open yet. However, he wrote a one-star review about something that's not even open yet.

May I spell lame with three letters? Yeah, tried way too hard for a review for a place that wasn't even open. I actually saw that place on Google Review. I hadn't seen that review, but they had responded and said, oh, yeah, that was a mistake with Google. We're not sure why they... Our website said December. Exactly. And so this guy's going to bring down their rating because...

Yes, they are. Actually, Google corrected at one point, not Google, the museum responded and said, oh, no, our website listed it as December. We're sorry if Google, there was a miscommunication and they listed it wrong. And the person was like, well, December is a terrible time to go to the museum.

It's too cold. And I was like, okay, they can't win. Some people just can't let them win. We found that with the research we've done, we found that places just can't win sometimes. Like you can't fight it. You just can't beat these people. They're just going to, I mean, you can't fight the stupidity of some reviewers. The trolls are outnumbering us all.

Okay, so do I do... I have a second one. Do I just do it? Go for it. Okay. Yeah. This is a review of the old Idaho Penitentiary, which... I want to see that place.

Sounds like it's not a museum, but it is. Oh, cool. And this is by Steven. Also one star? This is also one star. My wife and I arrived at the small penitentiary at 420. Expecting to be able to spend 40 minutes exploring and taking photographs before the advertised 5 p.m. close. The desk clerk referred us to her manager who seemed to gain great delight in telling us we had missed final entry by only a few minutes.

I told him we were in Boise for only one day, having traveled from the UK to road trip coast to coast. I asked if I might take a couple of photographs from the door just in front of us. He said he would have to charge me if I did, so I agreed to pay. He sneered that they had already closed the tills and that he would not take my money. My wife and I love the US and visit often because of the welcome we generally receive from Americans. This badly dressed, uncaring public employee jobs worth spoiled our day in Boise. Given the opportunity to delight us, he chose to deny us. Ooh. It was deep.

What a nice play on words, kind of. And he seemed to get a lot of satisfaction from doing so. Boise Penitentiary, we'll remember you for your uncaring, sneering arrogance. Stephen. Gosh. People take things way too seriously. Oh, you know the kid working there was like please god no seriously we're closing we're i feel anyone who worked in retail i just feel that like that pain of like someone walks in the door as the place is closing up and everyone wants to go home

i hate those reviews where they're like they're still supposed to be open for five more minutes they refuse to serve me. I just wanted to get my entire soccer team 13 ice cream cones each and you won't serve me. You poorly dressed Jobsworth. Is that a thing? British wit right there. It is now. Yeah.

And also, how did they describe the the manager becoming delighted right this is actually very um i thought that poetic poetic but not in a good way in a very bad bad way right uh unpoetic i think is what that is that's that's it yeah um the desk clerk referred us to her manager who seemed to gain great delight in telling us we had missed final entry by only a few minutes no they did not gain such great delight that's not why why they see people every single day and probably turn away people every single day why would they delight out here exactly they want to go home and watch game of thrones yeah and they don't want to deal with

you running around and keeping them late oh my god people oh steven steven thank you but oh i have one more oh okay sorry no oh wait no this is the one we both found oh that's right what do we do you go first yeah you guys we did a thing where we accidentally found the same review yeah and we got a little over eager because we told each other ahead of time okay i got a review from this place i got a review from this place okay well i had found i hadn't didn't look at those places so here mine anyway long story short then we both decided to add a little bonus one and we happened to pick the same one from the same website it just whoops the daisies okay so you tell yours first and then we'll figure out what to do with the perfect number three okay i have two okay this is a uh one star review from

emily of the boise art museum i actually found a museum i did not like and that museum is the boise art museum maybe it was just the current exhibit that was on display. Maybe it is because I grew up in New York City, which has a vast variety of museums. Come on. Wait, does it really, though? I've never heard that before. More than Boise?

Probably, like, maybe they have, like, five in New York. I think Boise has about four. Right, including that penitentiary, so it might be a little misleading. Exactly. Or maybe it's because my schooling at art school was a totally different medium than the art displayed at this museum. I'm going to push this person off a cliff.

I knew you would love this version. I'm going to push this person off a cliff. But whatever it was, I could not appreciate most of the artwork shown here. The museum itself was very small, which I felt was not worth the price it's marked. Even so, I've enjoyed even smaller museums than this one. The current exhibit, which took up half the museum, reminded me of what Muppets would look like on crack. Ooh, I'm sure this person has quite an arts degree. Yes, but I, see, that's something I would want to see.

Oh, I'm fascinated. Muppets an arts degree. Yes, but I, see, that's something I would want to see. Oh, I'm fascinated. Muppets on crack? Sign me up. Send me, that sounds very avant-garde. I don't know what this person's talking about. Especially for Boise. Manhattan. No, and I don't know Boise, but from what I've read in other reviews, and like, the

fact that they only have a few art museums, like, hey. Oh, no, you just insulted Boise. I know, I really did, didn't I? We're not gonna forget. My girlfriend was born in Idaho, so that means so you're in big fucking trouble well i thought that would kind of redeem me a little bit and it was a loving jab i'm from ohio anyway now i insulted people from ohio oh okay let me move on you're a train wreck. The rest of the museum was a bit better, but it was

distracting and odd to me how you can mix up the art period so sporadically. One minute you're looking at a sake jug from the 1800s. The next minute you're looking at a painting made two years ago. And it jumps back and forth like this. I'm used to museums like the Guggenheim. Oh my

God! Or the MoMA where work periodically progresses so you can enjoy the eras in which art came from. Some of the newer artwork was also a bit insulting since it seemed like things I was painting or sculpting before I even went to high school. It also didn't have much variety as it seems like it only showed, at the time I visited, only two different themes. I did, however, like Boise Art Museum's Art in the Park event. At least that's free admission and has more variety of work. And probably a fucking white wine for you to drink. Oh yeah, only the best. Items for sale are also way overpriced, in my opinion. End of review. I'm used to the Guggenheim, but this Idaho museum is way overpriced for my budget.

They had some, yeah. What an insane person. It was, it was, that was, see, that is insulting. Oh, that is the most condescending thing I've ever heard. Exactly. Maybe it's just because the art I studied in art school was a different level than this socky jug from the 1800s i made that in eighth grade i was making sake jugs in eighth grade too um but they reviewed so many places oh no so many

and i found a museum um in new york that she had reviewed oh no. And just part of it, I'm not going to read any of it, but she did say that the Museum of Sex in New York is prejudiced against short people because she's 4'11", and her neck hurt from looking up for two hours to read things. I thought it was going to be because they didn't feature short people in the sex exhibits. I really did.

I was like, what the fuck? No, it had to do with the height of like the placards that what yeah the maybe it's so children don't read it you know you think of that i don't it's so weird though i read through so many reviews that this person had written and so many of them were very reasonable very well thought out very i don't know and then you get those condescending ones that is like what your real colors yeah sharon yeah what's their name emily whatever um and one other thing that i did find yes something that did make me appreciate emily a little bit more okay um i gave a four star review of guy fieri's vegas kitchen oh my god we did just post about his birthday yes and i have been to that have you place yeah where is that in vegas oh you would i just said it's his

vegas kitchen i wasn't listening to you i didn't think so you you hear guy fieri and your mind just goes yeah i hear you and i just shut my oh that's what it is okay well yes so that was nice to see Okay, I didn't think so. You hear Guy Fieri and your mind just goes, yeah. I hear you and I just shut my brain. Oh, that's what it is. Okay. Well, yes. So, that was nice to see. They can appreciate the finer things in life. Oh, I thought you were going to read it. So, it was a positive review of that. Yeah. Oh, so their standards are really higher then.

Yeah. No wonder they didn't like an art museum. They said that the fondue dippers were the best thing that they have ever eaten in their life. I mean, they didn't go to culinary school so i guess that's fair true jesus true but that was that reveal um that was emily for everyone thank you emily thank you emily for that bullshit oh that was really rude no it was it was rude okay i did also find um a review from uh pete okay of the boise art museum oh same one waste of time and money and my own existence pete at least he's fucking dynamic with his review and

it's funny i'm looking at it and how i put in my notes was as a screenshot and their profile picture is of a duck so i can just look at this duck so his existence means a whole whole lot right why do people design and exhibit crap and why did i pay for it do you know what i feel cheated there is this exhibition of this person's quote artwork done using reflectors the same sort of thing you get on bicycles and he had to arrange them in pretty patterns that's all there was to it nothing else looked all right when you shined a torch at it how much do these people get paid because it's too much don't waste your money here because i already did oh and you can't take photos why would you i already did oh and you can't take photos why would you so maybe they should have swapped out and he could have gone to the muppets on crack exhibit oh yeah right that seems more up his alley

p i think maybe he would have enjoyed that would have maybe wanted to take a photo of that yes wow yeah that's the boise art museum wow it sounds like a place i want to be at now like yesterday take me there okay so here's the uh the uh the uh what should i call it review that we both found how do you want to do this of the museum of mining and geology it's not shocking to me that we both immediately looked at the Museum of Mining and Geology. With our metallurgy background. Almost forgot the word. Metallurgy. That's how important it is to us.

Well, yeah, this is a one-star review from Robert. Why don't you begin? Should we do sentence by sentence? Sentence by sentence. Oh, wow. Okay. This is episode 10. We're going crazy.

Oh, boy. Trying out some new spicy things. Yeah. Do you want me to read the caption? Yes. Free but rude employees. Rude, inconsiderate person behind the desk. Waste of time.

Mr. or Miss Don't Touch Anything person. We didn't touch anything in the building, but the person yelled at us and we said, okay. Then the person said, don't you understand English? Wow. Not reasonable at all. Sad, angry people in there. I guess gold fever turned into gold brain damage. Oh, they were so proud of that last line. i don't really understand it but no but they're in a rock museum and the person's like i'm sorry that was probably offensive to geologists but but they're saying don't touch that there's a reason that this person is repeatedly telling you to stop touching things yeah and if they keep if someone had to say do you not understand

english they're probably still just doing it over and over again maybe they don't i mean Stop touching things. Yeah. And if someone had to say, do you not understand English, they're probably still just doing it over and over again. Maybe they don't. I mean, that last line is questionable at best. Well, I actually found a redemption. You did? Yeah. Fantastic.

Well, a friend of mine, John, he messaged me about the World Center for Birds of Prey. I looked at this and I couldn't they had so many positive reviews and it was they were so reasonable so many of them 15 birds of prey there in case anyone's wondering and these reviews were just so nice and there was someone i even saw someone who gave cons and explained why it wouldn't be for everyone right and gave five stars oh that's the world it made me so happy that's an alternate universe i want to live in exactly so it was this place seems amazing everyone check it check it out uh-huh um i know i will if i end up in boise at some point i'm afraid of birds that's true i'll go to the rock museum but here's what robert had to say five stars neat place to be edumacated on raptors and stuff.

I bought the year pass because I'm rich and can afford it. Wait, is this a five star? Yes. JK, because it supports a great cause. Chuckle, chuckle, chuckle. Got a calendar with the year pass. Go birds! That's it. got a calendar with the year pass go birds like there's so many like adorable reviews of like with about kids enjoying it and stuff just like dad jokes yeah and i really liked roberts who was very robert sounds like

a winner stepdad oh yeah go birds go birds i love my calendar someone also uh wrote a review of it a five-star one as a haiku um wow yeah people were all about that place coming in hot people were all about that place yeah check out the world center for birds of prey oh my gosh i'm so happy about that yeah okay well is it about is it about time for my presentation? Yes, I think it's about time for the squirrels. Should I get my PowerPoint out? Please tell me there are pictures involved here. A lot of word art.

Oh, yes. So, okay. Only for patrons. Yeah, that's a good one. You get my creepy slideshow with a lot of custom, what's it called when they bounce onto the screen? Movement? Transitions?

Custom transition. Text? I don't know. We want people to support us on Patreon. We do? Oh, I mixed it up. Okay. If you donate on Patreon, then you don't have to look at my cool PowerPoints.

Okay. This is a a my challenge was to find a positive review of a park that mentions squirrels um in which ideally the squirrels are uh integral to the positive review yes so i was minding my own business did not cheat until i was on tour for this other podcast about murders that, you know, you wouldn't want to know about that. Are you a groupie? What? You're a groupie and you follow a podcast about murder?

Interesting. I'm trying to keep it on the DL. Okay. So I was following them around and I was in Texas and I got a text from a certain someone named Allie who happens to be your girlfriend. I hope I don't start an argument tonight between you that's fine because i have to get some sleep tonight um she has great ideas but i did get a text from ali i did feel a little bit like i was in house of cards um because it was like hey it was like i got some secret intel and it was like but don't it was like keep it on i mean i can already tell

i know what she's talking about i like chucked my phone off a bridge afterward, killed a few people, and here I am. Where is Allie, by the way? I haven't seen her in weeks. Are you ready for slide two? Collateral damage. Yeah. So, point being, she texts me and she goes, I just listened to the latest episode. I want you to know that my hometown of Longview washington hosts an annual squirrel fest it sure does so they have i've been there multiple times so you knew about this i know about the screw that's why i said i know where this is going

because i know blaze literally said i guarantee you he knew about this already and i wasn't honestly i wasn't thinking about that when i gave you that i figured it was in your subconscious somewhere somewhere because whenever we go there you drive under bridge squirrel bridges oh i'll tell you about oh okay sorry that's my next we're getting ahead of it has to spin in it'll take about six minutes so long view also features squirrel bridges the most famous being nutty narrows. I did not know they were named. Which holds the world records for both narrowest bridge and narrowest animal crossing. Now, Longview, Washington, Allie's hometown, is very adorable. And they really do just love their squirrels and it's precious.

They also have the Longview Squirrel Fest every year. they also have the long a long view squirrel fest every year um in fact just this past year uh the squirrel fest featured a special concert by the cherry poppin daddies no i'm not kidding right we missed it though oh my god i know i'm a little bummed don't tell me anya was there too the celtic woman was there um so right so obviously at this point i was like well let me in let me in right now i need to know more so this is a review from christopher of the nutty narrow squirrel bridge um and i believe it's civic center is the park or it's a little it's a little park so christopher says wow this does sound a lot like house of cards hold on never mind you'll see while not confirmed by quote official sources president's bill clinton

after eating fish and chips at cap and yobis george w bush and barack obama all visited this beloved location. No. Why? While not confirmed by, quote, official sources. I'm like, okay, Christopher. People- I chose to ignore that part completely and just- I just love that they put official sources in quotations. I mean, it's not official, but word on the street is, Bill Clinton ate some fish and chips w bush and barack all showed up

to see the squirrel bridge okay people of all backgrounds travel to this place of spirituality to find clarity in life no wonder ali's so such an odd bird within a few hundred feet you can leave nuts of gratitude at the feet of the mysterious squirrel shrine. To this day, no one knows where this 20-foot-tall squirrel statue came from, only appearing in the midst of a summer lightning storm. Without the Nutty Narrows Bridge,

squirrel families would have been separated. Longview Founding Fathers, as the nation's second planned city, I wonder if that's about official sources, I don't know, made sure that the Great Divide never occurred. This is a strong theory as to why the Great Squirrel appeared so long ago. Hashtag local. Hasht long ago. Hashtag local. Hashtag travel. Hashtag squirrel.

Oh my gosh. I was like peeing my pants at the official sources. Oh, okay. Okay, find some clarity at the nutty bridges. That's so funny. Nutty narrows. So, then I felt a little bit like I had cheated. Like I was Kevin Spacey, but before he was outed for all the terrible, terrible things.

Yes. Right. So, this is, so I pulled up a couple like little reviews of other parks. Now, I wanted to actually prove to my, I wanted to test this theory out. It is incredibly easy to find positive reviews about squirrels in parks. Is it really? Like, incredibly easy. Oh, weird.

Like, I had many, many to choose from. And I think the reason is that squirrels are not native to every country. Interesting. Yeah. That's true. I'll just read it to you. Our childhood was like, squirrels are a pest. Squirrels and cicadas galore.

People would shoot them because they wanted less of them yeah fewer of them oh god i'm sorry no i'm annoying you're right you're right suzy had something to say about griffith park which is where we live yes nearby we don't live in we don't even live that close anymore we live live at a squirrel bridge in Griffith Park. We take the squirrel bridge to work. It's close to House of Pies. It is. Maybe third favorite restaurant.

Oh my God. Okay. Susie says, On a beautiful hot day, we walked to Griffith Park. We didn't get to see any rattlesnakes, despite the warning signs. Get to? Bummer. Oh my gosh.

But we did enjoy getting fairly close to a squirrel. Who was... Why? Who was enjoying a nut snack as we wandered by. Susie's adorable. No, I love this I have one from Linda too

Of Griffith Park My experience at Griffith Park Was lovely We don't have squirrels Back home And hope to see them During our stay In the United States

I could have watched them All afternoon So precious Okay I think that review Also ended with like The toilets toilets are also fairly clean. Oh, well, good. But anyway, these are very wholesome.

Now I have one that's a little off, but still a positive review. Okay. Of Central Park. I decided to pick, I was like, there can't be, like this maybe is an L, I think. Nope, it's everywhere. Really? Yep. Central Park.

Dory says, Dory, says, Great park, beware of squirrels. The park is massive and full of fun adventures for children. The views are also amazing and it's definitely worth renting a bike. As a huge squirrel enthusiast, I ignored the do not feed wildlife sign and decided to offer peanuts to my ungrateful friends. As I offered the peanut, the squirrel decided to take my finger instead. I was handing out blood-soaked nuts for the rest of the day.

You ignore the signs. You do it anyway. You get bit. You start bleeding. And you keep going. You bleed on the nuts. Ew. Dory is a squirrel enthusiast.

Okay, there's more. By Dory? Yes. Oh my gosh. Please note that the city of New York has been monitoring the squirrel population for over two decades, and no cases of rabies have ever been reported. If you get bitten, it'll hurt, but you'll be perfectly fine. Enjoy the park

oh dory i can't imagine anyone reading that and thinking to themselves oh fuel like next time i go like i'm gonna put myself in the position where i might uh be bitten by a squirrel but it's gonna be okay i just i was wondering if maybe they wrote that so that people wouldn't comment like, oh my God, did you get a rabies shot? Yeah, I guess. But who cares about whether or not Dory got rabies? Yeah, I don't think that's it at all. I think Dory just really wanted to advise other people to shove their fingers in squirrels'

mouths. All right. So that's what I found. That was wonderful. Yikes. I'm excited to go back to Longview now. I mean, I'm excited to hitch a ride. Yeah.

Stow away in your suitcase. I'm going to be a groupie with you up in Portland. I'm actually going to the crime show. That crime show. Crime show in Portland. That's what I always say. I think I might have to pay homage to the squirrel shrine. Yeah.

And find clarity. I don't remember seeing the 20 foot tall one. Um, I have seen like, you know, Cincinnati has a flying pigs. They have squirrels. Oh, really? Yeah, they do do that. Well, maybe, um, the lightning storm hadn't struck yet. That's it.

In which our savior appeared. Well, we had that in Cincinnati. What? Touchdown. Jesus got struck by lightning. Oh, that is correct. Yes, that did happen. Yeah. Yes? Touchdown Jesus got struck by lightning. Oh, that is correct. Yes, that did happen. Yeah.

Yes, on I-75. Good times. Cool. So, I guess we're going to give a little exciting update and a review and a challenge, but we're going to do our little spiel first. Yeah. And it's good. You should listen, because this is how you'll find out about cool stuff.

Cool stuff. You can find us on Twitter and Instagram, at Beach2Sandy. Our Facebook is Beach2SandyWater2Wet. Our email is Beach2Sandy at gmail.com. And our website is Beach2Sandy.com. Pretty easy, folks. Pretty easy.

Write in. Give us your suggestions for Patreon, your suggestions for reviews. Like themes, locations, whatever you want. Et cetera. Yeah. And yeah, we like hearing from you. We do.

Now we have a fun little update. Yes, a fun update. I'm pretty excited about this. On our 10th episode. Switching things up a bit. Yeah. You guys right now are getting one two three four episodes per month now you're getting a fifth can you jump in here you really practice this and yeah no i was letting

you do your thing i don't like it please please jump in let me You really practice this, didn't you? Yeah, no. I was letting you do your thing. I don't like it. Please jump in. Let me pull up their slideshow real quick. Oh, yeah. So, right. We have decided to add a kind of a monthly bonus episode for everybody, not just on Patreon, but just kind of a fun bonus episode that's sort of like listener contributions. So, we were trying to figure out what to do with all the fun reviews people send in that they find all over the place online.

And we thought the best way to do it is just kind of compile them in a monthly episode and read them for you guys. And yeah. And right now we don't really have a structure to it. We're thinking just what, what people send us, we're going to just read because it's fun because right now we're, we've been keeping it pretty i don't know

just just in this city just this kind of review yeah but it'll be fun to actually kind of branch out well we get so many random ones and we don't know what to do with them but we want to share them so this is like a fun way to just we've shared some on like twitter like screenshots yeah just like word vomit them all over exactly but guys but um like for example the sugar-free gummy bears i mean we've. We've gotten a lot. Some hilarious reviews. A lot of requests for that. People have been telling us to just read them, but we haven't thought of how to.

Right. Like wedge those into our episodes. So let's just make a whole new episode. Right. So starting in February, once a month, we're going to release a special episode from where that's made up of your contributions. That's right. And we would love for you guys to send in more.

We love seeing them and they're always really freaking funny and things we probably wouldn't have stumbled upon by ourselves. So send them in and hopefully we can start featuring them. Yeah. Looking forward to that. All right. All right. So do you,

I'm doing the challenge. Are you ready for your theme? Absolutely not. Your theme was actually suggested by a listener, Stephanie. Okay. Strip clubs in Las Vegas, Nevada. Oh, hell yeah. Yeah.

Oh, hell yeah. Does Guy Fieri's count? Oh, yeah. Okay. Let me write this down. His was my favorite. His was, I thought it was the classiest of the joints. I mean, I do hear that the chicken strips are great or whatever.

Jalapeno poppers. Yeah, best drip club buffet in all of Vegas. Okay, so this is also something sent in by a listener. I actually had another idea that Alyssa sent me, our friend Alyssa. Yeah. And she suggested it and I'm tweaking it in my brain. So I don't want to, I'll save that for next week. But this is an email we got from Cam, Campbell.

And Campbell, I tweaked their idea too. But I was thinking that your challenge could be finding a one-star review of a Trump hotel written by a Trump supporter. Oh. Does that work? I think so. Okay. I'd say so. They suggested Trump hotel, but I think a challenge could be fun to like, that they were like really gung-ho.

Yeah. But something besides the fact that it's the Trump hotel made them not enjoy their stay. Because I imagine there are many reviews on both sides. Exactly. One-star and five star reviews that have popped up who probably didn't have never been to those places so if you can find something where someone is an outspoken perhaps trump supporter and did not enjoy their time uh against all odds maybe that could work okay i guess we could also say all trump uh

properties so golf course whatever yeah yeah okay trump properties oh man as long as it has the name in 40 feet trump and gold letters on it which it will so okay see this is uh so the white house council um so does guy furious Vegas. So, okay. See, this will either make me very sad or very happy. I don't think there's any in between. I'm not sure what to expect, which is why I'm... You're going to go on a journey, which is why I'm glad that I'm leaving town to follow my groupie podcast around. Yeah. If Allie ever pops up after, I don't know, after your talk about squirrels.

Yeah. She's been missing but um she'll have to deal with whatever side this brings out in me oh god yeah this is a serious i'm out yeah okay um thanks guys for listening i know we just dumped a lot on you um but we appreciate uh you sticking with us to the end hey they've been asking for longer episodes we're gonna just talk their ears off them. Yeah, motherfucker. This is what you get. Careful what you wish for.

Yeah, seriously. But yeah, reach out to us. Let us know your ideas. Send in your reviews and talk to you next week. Bye, guys. Bye. Bye.

Bye.