Beach Too Sandy, Water Too Wet - 231: Reviews of Preschools

Episode Date: May 3, 2023

This week we ponder a question as old as time: Are rats in a preschool better dead or alive? Get your live show tickets now! https://www.beachtoosandy.com Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Get your mystery pin!!! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer Check out our Instagram: instagram.com/beachtoosandy Logo by Courtney Aventura. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Add your voice to the mix and let fresh answer back with perfect harmony in pure Michigan. Keep it fresh at michigan.org. Welcome to Beach to Sandy, Water to Wet. A podcast featuring real reviews written by people who just need the world to know what they think. Between you and me, I wanted to like this podcast, but I'd give it zero stars if I could. Welcome to... and that's... Awkward.

And that's why we're here today. Beach too sandy, water too wet today. The one and only. Is the way to say the name of this podcast. Today we are reviewing... Preschools. Preschools. Are we qualified to do that? No no which is why we're not reviewing them

yeah we're not reading reviews of them we're gonna definitely have lots of thoughts we always do we always do uh whether you like it or not how was this experience for you i guess what do you think it's like not great yeah i struggled yeah this was our fault this was in that that google doc we have all the themes i don't remember our fault. This was in that Google Doc we have of all the themes. I don't remember our fault. I don't remember being part of this. It was. You just told me.

You put it in the list. Crap. And I used it. Crap. And people voted for it. So I did do this. Yes. Okay.

I take full responsibility. Good. That's out of the way. Now that it can be proven that I was responsible. No. I mean, exactly what that patron commenter said. It can get depressing. There's some really fucked up shit that happens in preschools. And that's true for many of the things we talk about, that there's fucked up shit. But I don't know, when it comes to very small children, sometimes it's just not good. Okay, but to clarify, we're not like bringing those.

No, God no. So if you're listening to this and you're like, nevermind. It was just rough for us to slog through those. Sort through. So just to give you an idea of the kind of gold content we're bringing to you today, I have a one-star review. This was sent in by Elta Sheher. And she sent a link to this place called Care Corner in Minnesota. And I have a one-star review. Is it with Ks?

No. I feel like preschools love Ks instead of Cs. Kinder care, all that. Yeah. Yeah. This is by Whitney, and it's one star. I just passed one of the Care Corner buses, and the driver was wearing no shirt. I understand it's a little warm out, but for God's sake, keep your clothes on.

This is a business for children. I would never bring my child to a place like this if they think this is okay. End of review. Would you bring your child to a pool? A public pool? Even a private pool? Okay. I don't know.

This is a bus driver. We had some weird bus drivers. I know. I was like, I was going to say, what's wrong with this bus driver? And then I was like, well. I mean, the thing is, when I was little, we had some weird ass bus drivers. And you know what? I never, I always loved it.

It was fun. I think I never had a bus driver, like really negative bus driver experience. But I think if mom had known about some of the things that occurred. She would have written a review. She would have freaked out. We would drive and we drove around a block. It was like last day of school or something. Yeah.

And I remember when we drove by a certain block, there were these kids with super soakers. And they were spraying it to our bus windows. And we absolutely loved it. So the bus driver went around like four more times. And then all of a sudden they started throwing glass bottles and we were like, that was a separate thing. Okay. Well, in my head, I've conflated them. No.

But one time we got, well, anyway. We didn't go on that route anymore. The kids threw glass at us. There were a lot of weird instances that I'm sure weren't necessarily appropriate. But to be fair, it says, I know it's warm out, but this is in Minnesota. So like it can't be that warm. They have summers too. I don't know. I feel like buses have air conditioning. You don't have to be shirtless

to drive children around. I'm sorry. I didn't say this man has to be shirtless. I never felt that way. I just got a text from you that says, this man has to be shirtless. Leave him alone. And it looks like your name. Well, you know what? In a mustache. Would I drive a bunch of kids around shirtless?

No. I sure hope not. Would I drive a bunch of kids around also? No. With a shirt? Probably not either. Like, it doesn't seem inherently negative or dangerous to me. Okay, well to be fair.

A man not wearing a shirt. I was slightly biased because this place has 2.2 stars out of 5. Oh, wow. With 40 reviews. Oh, shit. Okay, well. It's not great. I feel like a lot of the ones that I found were the few negatives out of a ton of positives.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because it's always like very specific, I don't know, issues. Remember that time we went to a bowling party hosted by our bus driver? It was just like you, me, Akshay, Tennant, and like Logan or something. What a time. Was that the bus driver who, no, that was the, oh man. That was a good time. That was a good time.

She like hosted a party for us. It was really sweet. Yeah. Who was the bus driver that called you Steenie Weenie? That was a guy. Yeah, that was a weird dude. That one was weird. Like if that man was driving a shirtless around, I'd probably tell mom.

I'm pretty sure something happened because he went away very quickly. But then there was Miss Christina. Yeah, is that who that was? She said a lot of slurs and bad words. Jeez, I don't remember that. I do. Anyway. Anyway. Bus driving. Good times. I salute you bus drivers. All of you.

Put up with them so much shit. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. To be fair, of any inappropriate behavior that happened, we were the cause of 99% of it. Exactly. Like, we were the problem. Not denying that, like, you know. And that's how I feel about this shirtless man.

I bet this guy deals with enough. Let some kid brought scissors and cut his shirt off. Also, we don't know that it's a man. It just is the driver. Oh, I thought it said he. Nope. Could have sworn they did that. Whoops.

So. I don't know. Well, driver Could have sworn they did that. Whoops. So. I don't know. Well, driver with your shirt off, I salute you. Okay. This next one is, let's see, Get Smart Kids Academy in North Miami, Florida. One star. Danger! If you're not part of the favorite parent club, get ready.

For you and child to be targeted and outcasted. If you have an accident at home, from my own personal experience, they have no problem calling DCF on you. Before consulting you about the issue. They're real nice with the tours, with smiles. But once you're in, no more smiles. The mother of the owner is very condescending. Biggest mistake putting my child in that school. End of review.

DCF is Florida's Department of Children and Families. Right, right. So that's there. And I kind of brought this because the response from the owner was very nice and kind. I'm not going to read it, but they were like, we wish the best for your daughter going forward. Some of them were so awkward. It was like, some of the responses were like, we're sorry that you felt like you could behave this way, but we hope you find a place that's a little more deserving of your attitude. Just like the most underhanded like hysterical responses. Because like, man,

I can't imagine dealing with all... And the thing is, like for parents, it's a big deal. Well, yeah. It's the first time you're letting your kid, for many, I'm sure, letting your kid out of your sight for longer than whatever time. But like, if the kid comes in talking about something that happened at home and they report it like why are you writing a review and leaving that there as if like this place isn't doing their

utmost like if i read that review and i were looking for a program i'd be like oh good good right okay they called somebody when the kid reported an accident. Okay, so this is of the Willow Tree House Preschool and Daycare. This is a one-star review. It's a local guide named Walker, and it's one star, and it's just a rating. And so here's the response from the owner. Walker, it is always sad when a former employee does not quite fit the hardworking culture of the center. Especially one who seemed so impressive on paper. Now that we have parted ways, I truly hope you can find a happier employment situation, one that isn't as exacting as my own.

Again, I wish you the best of luck in the future. End of review. That is brutal. That's brutal. That's brutal. That's hilarious. I just, I'm like, you know, of course that's going to happen. Yeah, why are you thinking? If you're using your full name on.

Don't do that. I did not give, I made up a name, but yeah, that's, I mean, you're going to get roasted if you do that. Yeah. Oh my gosh. My next one is of that same place. One star. This school is run by greedy lowlifes. They stole a lot of money from me

and I will be suing them in small claims court and anybody else who has any claims against this company, I suggest you do the same. End of review. Join my petition. I don't know. Maybe I didn't look close enough. I didn't see anyone else talking about anything like this.

Same with that other person. It was the same school and it was like these complaints. So specific. MoveOn.org to see if they've created a petition. MoveOn.org? Move.org? MoveOn.org? I thought so. Yeah.

Change.org is the one i know okay change dot org whatever okay move on is what are we moving on from a lot true it's a real website okay i don't know it's where you sign petitions i mean it's the same thing i think as um the other one what are we moving on from what a loaded question out, Alex Zuner. Here, create a petition. You got me. Oh, does it move on? Is that what it's called? Yes! Okay, okay, okay. Mad? Sad? Inspired? Fired up and ready to take action?

You don't need to wait for an organization to start a petition. Okay. Do it yourself, buddy. So I feel like maybe we could find that person's, I'm sure. Yeah, maybe. It's like when people say, like, join me. And it's like one person found this review helpful. This one at least had three thumbs up.

Oh, okay. But again, it's the same thing, same place. These like vague things, they won't say what happened. Yeah. They will give a vague description of what happened. Yeah. But not admit to any specifics. Yeah.

And I don't think it's because they have lawyers involved. I think it's because they know that. Yeah, exactly. They're all talk, I assume. Well, this one, the reviewer has a point, I think. And I will say, the content is a little upsetting. It's not... Like, it's not...

Okay. This is your favorite review ever and you love everything this person says the content is just great the content is your favorite i think that what made me laugh was the way they said it so tongue-in-cheek and so like dispassionately so the like the stuff that happened is not okay but the way that they reported it just was like very tongue-in-cheek to me. So, I'm going to read it. Okay. This is of La Petite Academy in Oklahoma.

This is just so people don't write and say, Christina, it's not funny. Like, I know it's not funny that people. I mean, I remember when I read that review of like the cat being under the porch or some shit. Yeah, I'm never going to. I will. Alexander, do you know how often I think about that? People weren't happy either. And it's like, I don't think that's a positive experience.

You really ruined my day with that in many days after. So anyway. Anyway. Thanks for reminding everyone. You're welcome. This is by Alan. It's a two-star review, and it's of the La Petite Academy in Oklahoma. Two stars.

I guess it was better than leaving my son at home alone. Maybe. After several bites, I asked that my son at home alone. Maybe. After several bites, I asked that my son not be in the same room as the biter. They assured me he would not. That lasted almost a whole day. I walked into the room for the two-year-olds and had to tell my son's friend to please take the plastic Walmart bag off her head. I guess Gail was too preoccupied to notice or care.

Hopefully they have new management and new employees. They did have a few teachers that were attentive, but since Lacey was promoted from director, the place has gone downhill. End of review. Whoa. This felt like very kids will be kids. That's what I'm saying. It was so just like blasé. It was like, oh, I told her to take the Walmart bag off her head.

Like, what the fuck is going on in this place? Yeah, and the amount of biting that happened in these reviews that I read was insane. Can I tell you something? It's not the fault of the preschool that some of the students are biting. I don't think. I mean, maybe they can de-escalate to a degree. I think there's protocol and stuff. I don't know. I'm looking at programs right now, as you know, and so this was extremely overwhelming for me to be researching. But it reminds me of the time we researched wedding reviews like a month after I got married. And I was like, why am I doing this again?

But there were some where it was like, okay, I will say we were visiting some preschools or some programs and I watched a kid get bit in person. And it was horrific. I was like, this poor child. It's upsetting. And I've always been like, what if my child bites someone? Like, I don't know. I don't know how that happens. I don't know.

I'm sure there's protocols. Listen, I'll learn, I'm sure, soon. Okay. But there's a lot of biting. There's so much biting. It's upsetting. And like a lot of the reviews were's so much biting. It's upsetting. And a lot of the reviews were like, I didn't find out until my kid got home.

They didn't tell me that my kid was bitten. There's pictures and stuff. Why are we talking about it? We're not supposed to talk about it. I'm sorry. Last episode, I said that. This might happen. Yeah, I know. Okay, here we go.

My next one is of Sentia Early Learning in Melbourne, Australia. This is a one-star review. This is written by Tyra. Not exactly happy with the service at Sentia. They asked me to write a nice review, so the staff were very nice, but the center director was bossy and thought she was the best. She's like, she was so bossy she kept saying, write a review.

Do it. Now. I'm the best. You should write a review about me. Write a review about how I'm the best. And well, they did. It worked. The kids were kind and location was great, but because no one talked to me and every morning I was greeted with an unenthusiastic hello, I don't

recommend. No one talked to me. Yeah. Except every single day when they gave me a hello, but okay. Oh yeah. Yeah. No.

Yeah. They said every morning they were, but it was unenthusiastic. So it doesn't count. Well, well, well, well,

well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well,

well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well,

well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well,

well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well,

well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well,

well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, reading all like this. I love it when parents are like, this is not.

So reading all of this, there's nothing about how it's a bad place for your child. How many stars was that? One. Do you think they just don't like being told what to do? So when they were like, write a review, they were like, fine. I think it was. Let me double check. But I want to say this was the only one star. They have a 4.8 with 52 reviews.

So it might have been the only one starstar. They have a 4.8 with 52 reviews. So it might have been the only one-star review. Yes, there was a two-star. Just talking about how rude the lady in charge is, but how the staff and the children are lovely. Okay. And so this is what that other person is. Oh, yeah, everyone is so lovely except for one person. Therefore, one star. This place is terrible.

It's like, come on. It's for your kid, isn't it? I understand if the kid's being mean to your children, or the person's being mean to your kids, but it was just like, I'm not greeted enough? Yeah, if you're not getting enough attention, it's like,

maybe that's a good thing. Maybe their attention is elsewhere. Yeah, as it should be. Maybe they're pulling plastic bags off the heads of other children. Fingers crossed. I hope so. Someone should be. This is a review of Oklahoma Christian Academy. So this is actually written by somebody who went here like in the past. Okay.

And I'm assuming that this is an older child. Like I was looking at preschools and I was just going through so many dozens of reviews. And then I pulled this one and then later I was like, oh, I guess this is technically not a preschooler. You know, a review of the actual preschool program. But I had to keep it because it's just so bananas. So this is a one-star review by Lainey. Poverty simulator. The most offensive, terrifying experience I've ever had.

The poverty simulator occurred on Spiritual Emphasis Day. This occurred when I was a mere freshman. Okay, confirmed. They are not a preschooler. You just found this out. Okay. Yes. But this is, this is, sounds like art.

I mean, it sounds like you're, you're. Don't blame me. I was distracted by the word poverty simulator happening. No, no, no, no, no. I'm just thinking about how this relates to our experience at our Catholic school. Correct. The entire school participated in acting like poor people. There was food stamps and we had to feed our families to survive.

There was little to no supervision. Kids were fighting. I was shoved against a wall and threatened. Children were hiding in the restrooms, praying for safety. The small overcrowded hallways were packed with students. Kids were thrown to the floors and there was violence everywhere. It was truly a horrifying day. End of review.

And the staff were like, ah, they're getting the lesson. The spiritual has been emphasized. Spirituality has been emphasized. What a success. What did we all learn, kids? Being poor sucks. Yeah, we don't want to be poor, right? It's disturbing.

It's so stupid. Our school, which shall not be named, also participated in some of these activities where you- They probably still do. Simulated poverty. Literally. It's like looking back, so upsetting. Yeah, because when you're a kid and you're doing this, because you're not thinking, like, you're not learning much. No, you're not looking at it in depth.

If anything, you're like, oh, good, I'm not in class right now. Right. Like, oh, good, I'd rather be... Or I'm with my friends and I get to... Yeah, you're goofing off. off like you're not taking it seriously cardboard boxes and sleep in them and order pizza tonight and sleep outside you know it's like it's really ridiculous I mean I know I've said this a million times but we had to panhandle outside the ballpark in our school uniforms and then you kept the money and then we kept like and it wasn't like oh we snuck the money. Like, and it wasn't like, oh, we snuck the money.

They were like, okay, you can keep what you've quote unquote earned and then order food with it. But then Nina's parents sent us a pizza on the deal.

You know what, one of the, wow, good job. You know, one of the biggest things I don't understand, being poor wasn't so bad.

When we were simulating poverty, we took the city bus. Yes, that too. Gasp. Gasp. And I remember everyone going, oh my God, we're getting on the bus. Literally.

Like everyone was so shocked by it. It's really embarrassing. And it was such a thing of like, oh, and like all these like fucking preppy. It was awful. It was awful. It's genuinely mortifying to think about. And our signs were like, homelessness affects blank population. And our signs were like, homelessness affects blank population.

It's like, yeah, we're standing in front of people who are actually unhoused and like actually asking for food and money. And we're like, this is fun. I mean, it's, you know, and we're children. It's not really necessarily an excuse. It's just to explain why our brains had processed how fucked up that was. But yeah, I love spiritual emphasis day poverty Day Poverty Simulator. That's exactly what I'd call what we did. Yes. Well, my next one is of the Abacus Nursery School, Palace Road in London, England. Whoa, Abacus. It's a chain I found. I found multiple places called Abacus Nursery in the London, greater London area. So I believe it's a chain, but this is the one on palace road. And again,

this is 4.9 out of five with 45 reviews. So glowing reviews. I read some of the glowing reviews and I'm like, I'm not bringing this cause they're just so positive and not interesting. Come on, give me some drama. Um, found some, uh, this is one star review by Adele. It's not the Adele. Different, different Adele. I mean, with a name like Abacus, I feel like it probably is like the hoity-toity famous people sending their kids here.

This person's name on Google is actually AA, space, AA. Okay. That's why I said Adele. Adele's a good poll, Zandy. Thank you. Good poll. AA space AA Okay That's why I said Adele Adele's a good poll, Zandy Here we go, one star My son used to go to this nursery And I have found out that there is rats Which are sometimes dead

I'm not even sure how this nursery is still open These poor kids I found out? Through the grapevine? Exactly, I have no idea Unless I miss These poor kids. End of review. I found out? Yeah. Through the grapevine? Exactly. Like, I have no idea because there was no, unless, again, unless I missed something, there was no mention of rats dead or alive in any of the other reviews. I like that they were like, sometimes they're dead.

Sometimes they're dead. Which, I mean, I'd rather. Are they better? Is that better or worse? Look. I'm not saying. I know what you're saying. You do.

For the sake of these children, for the sake of this health and safety, is it better that they're dead or alive? Like, what does it mean if they're dead or alive? Like, is it like, oh, if they're dead, it means there's some sort of, like, gas leak or if they're alive, it's like, oh, they're clearly leaving their. Yeah. And the kids could get bitten by someone other than another child. Oh, that's why any time a kid gets bit, they're like, it was just a rat.

Just a rat. Sorry. But really, it was the only, I think the only negative review of the entire place. Sorry, the only one, the closest to it was a four star. That's so bizarre. And the rest were five stars. Well, it's weird to say like my kid used to go there and I just found out there are rats. Yeah.

In what scenario did you find this out? Exactly. Like somebody just gossiping or like, did your child say, remember that time there was a rat at my preschool? Yeah. It's something that we would say, which is, and completely make up. And make it up. Yeah.

And I'm not saying, you know, when kids come home and tell their parents things, I'm not saying don't believe them, but I wonder if years later they just suddenly decide there's a rat. Just me as a former liar. Just don't believe them but i wonder if years later they just suddenly decide there's a rat just me as a former liar just don't believe sandy i'm just that was more of our personal experience rather than child is anything like us parenting advice yeah no i'm not saying like okay we don't believe children's stories about daycare i'm just saying years later if they bring up a rat for the first time maybe wonder like why have they not mentioned this sooner that there were rats at school? Maybe call the school or something.

Maybe it was a pet rat. Well, no, that would be bad if they're sometimes dead. Two freshly cracked eggs any way you like them. Three strips of naturally smoked bacon and a side of toast. Only $6 at A&W's in Ontario. Experience A&W's classic breakfast on now. Dine-in only until 11 a.m. Today.

Something is coming. Kong. Godzilla. They can feel it. Fight together. It's human up. Or face extinction. Godzilla Kong.

The new empire. Now playing only in theaters. This was actually posted on Reddit. I was just searching different phrases. This came up. It was by, oh my gosh. What? The user is My Ratato. Ratato? Maybe it's Myra Tatto. Or My Rat Tattoo.

Tattoo? Oh. Like Myra Tattoo? Myra Tattoo maybe. Maybe Myra's a tattoo. Or Myra Tattoo. Oh, I just love being a resident advisor so much that I got it tattooed on me. This is called Today's Bizarre and Completely Unhelpful Daycare Review.

And it's a one star. And they blocked out the business name. This school will not allow the teachers to say Happy Halloween and Merry Christmas to the children because they don't want to offend anybody, but they offend the teachers and many Americans. If anyone is offended, they can go back to their country where there is no freedom

of speech. S-P-E-A-C-H. Wow. There probably isn't that. I hope not. To be fair, there probably is not that anywhere. Where there is no freedom of speech, so ABC Preschool, go screw yourself. End of review. I made up a preschool name, obviously.

And I'm sure there is an ABC Preschool, so please know that it's not about them. This isn't about them. This isn't about them. Rat for you, preschool, go screw yourself. Yeah, I like, and then of course in the comments people were saying yeah at my son's daycare there were reviews saying that they didn't like it because they wouldn't let the children wander around

alone outside what the fuck they don't give them any independence I'm like what is this freedom of speech bullshit what well and then one commenter was like yeah my kid's school is jewish uh god forbid like they you know celebrate other holidays and are off for certain you know but so they will not let maybe they're trying to teach them that hallow't say happy Halloween, Merry Christmas at the same time because they're in separate months. What?

What? What does that mean? I know they are in separate months. Like it says the school will not allow the teachers to say happy Halloween, Merry Christmas. Yeah. Maybe they're just like, well. The rule is just because they're different months so they can't do it? Well, you're just like, well, because it's... The rule is just because they're different months so you can't do it? Well, you're just like...

What is Happy Halloween? Like the Halloween edition is so bizarre. Yeah. It's so... I've never... Like I feel like Halloween is the opposite of what these people who talk like this normally are fans. Like normally they're anti-Halloween. Yes.

Bizarre, right? Yeah. So maybe they're just trying to cover for the Merry Christmas thing by adding another. They're like, what's another holiday? To make it seem like I'm not just one of those people. They don't want to offend anyone by saying Happy Halloween. I mean... Oh my God. I don't know.

It seems like you're the only one who's offended quite frankly. I do... Something about Americans thinking that America's the freest country. It's just such a bizarre... I'm going to say it. It's propaganda that Americans thinking that America is the freest country. It's just such a bizarre, like, I'm going to say it. It's propaganda that's caused that. What makes people think we're any freer than, like, I don't know. Anywhere.

I don't understand. Health care is free? Like, exactly. Like, it's ridiculous. At least there's no freedom of speech anywhere else except here. And that's why I love this country. Freedom of speech does not mean freedom from consequences due to your speech, people. What are you trying to do?

Be a preschool teacher? Yes. Okay. That's all I have. What's even coming up in this preschool? I'm sorry. These people. So I tried to search this review to find like the original and it must have gotten deleted.

But I was looking for it. And oh, it looks like it was posted eight years ago. So I'm sure somebody's gotten rid of it by now. But in that research, I found all these memes for teachers basically being like, can't wait for Halloween at the preschool I teach at. Said no teacher ever or whatever. wait for Halloween at the preschool I teach at said no teacher ever or whatever you know just like all these memes about like Halloween at preschool is like such a chaotic like stressful time for teachers and you know I'm reading all that and I'm like yeah I feel like this is a really crackpot review yeah I've never said that phrase in my life I don't know what's happening to me

I don't know does that mean to me. I don't know. Does that mean like you're a cracked pot or does it have to do with crack cocaine? Oh, shit. I don't know. Oh, I don't know the origin. Good question. I don't know either. So you being my teacher, I thought maybe you'd know.

I have a preschool teacher, not a you teacher. An eccentric or foolish person. This is their example on Google. People who claim famous past identities are usually dismissed as crackpots. Thanks a lot. Interesting. Anyway. Is there no origin? Dating from the late 19th century, crackpot combines pot, slang for head, with crack, implying someone whose head is cracked.

Oh, a Humpty Dumpty reference. Definitions of crackpot. Okay, we know that already. Fruitcake is a synonym. Oh. That sounds like a fruity review. Just kidding. They would not like that.

They should go back to their own country because I have freedom of speech. Oh, my God. One of those – multiple of those – that place in Miami, that daycare, where like someone was complaining that they didn't get a job there because they didn't speak Spanish. It's like – Oof. And they're like, I'm being discriminated against. How dare you? And it's like, hey, guess what?

All these kids, when they go to like public school, they're going to be speaking English. And it's like, hey, guess what? All these kids, when they go to public school, they're going to be speaking English. And it's like, what the fuck? Like, it's not, even in the country, let alone like Miami area has plenty of Spanish-speaking people. Like, Ohio has plenty of Spanish-speaking people. You think that would be a bonus? Yeah. I mean, I guess if you're trying to work there. Work there is different.

But like, there was someone complaining that there's so much Spanish being spoken. Oh, my God. And it's like, hey, great. Your child will have a leg up once in something in the world. God forbid. You mean a pierna ventaja. That's not right. I don't think.

You know what? I'll get back to you on that one. I do want to learn Spanish. That's something I'd like to start. You can start in preschool, apparently. A lot of these places have bilingual programs. That's great. I think that's a great thing.

I have one more. That's my final one. I will warn you there's some strong language. Oh, cool. You've never warned me about that before. No, but it's specifically the word bitch is thrown out a lot. So just a fair warning. I'm going to read it.

Should we replace it with fruitcake? I don't think it'll have the same effect. I think it'll have a better effect. This review is wild. This is like not appropriate, not okay. I'm ready. I'm just going to read it, okay? And it's all one sentence.

Oh, God. There's one comma in there and then a period at the very end. Okay. I'm just going to read it, okay? And it's all one sentence. There's one comma in there and then a period at the very end. One star review. This is of Leap into Learning Preschool and Early Development Center in Las Vegas, Nevada. I will say the reviews are not glowing of this place. I'm so sorry. One star. This is written by Diane. of this place. I'm so sorry.

One star. This is written by Diane. I work at this daycare, aka roach infestation, for only one day, which my son also attended, and the infant teacher, aka bitch, went eight full hours without giving me son milk. His clothes was filthy and face not washed. When I

addressed them about it, they tried to make me seem like I was overreacting. That bitch, aka baloney-smelling, funny-built bitch, played the Karen role. I do not recommend this place for any child. They also provide food, but children were still complaining about being hungry due to very small portion sizes. End of review. Whoa! Can you say the insult one more time?

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Offer ends June 30th, 2024. New eligible clients only. Complete criteria by August 30th, 2024. Visit rbc.com slash student 100. I have a challenge, and this was submitted by Jessica on Patreon, who said, find a review of a paint and sip where the instructor insulted the reviewer's painting. Now, paint and sip is essentially one of those places where you go in and everybody, there's an instructor and they teach you how to paint, you know, some usually pretty standard basic

imagery of like either a sunset or a palm tree. And you can, you know, follow along with the instructions they supply that the paints and supplies and then you drink wine or beer. Have you done? No. Me neither. Oh, I assumed you would have. I know, right?

Me too, but I haven't. It feels like something that either of us would have done at some point. I agree. I've just never had the pleasure of going. I think it would be fun. That sounds fun. I'd be terrible. I like the kind of crafting idea of just drinking and crafting. I like having an activity when I go out and do things. Me too. I'd be terrible. I like the kind of crafting idea of like just drinking and crafting.

I like having an activity when I go out and do things. Me too. Like I love like trivia. That's why we like bar trivia so much. I got to have – I don't like – I tend to not – it depends on the company, but I tend not to like just sitting around at a bar. Well, I mean even when I watch TV, I'm like always either – I almost said drinking. I am doing that too. But like needle pointing or playing a game on my phone.

I'm constantly playing video games as I'm watching something. I don't know. I feel like my brain just can't sit still, which is probably, you know, not the best. But oh well. But so paint and sip. It's a fun idea. You know, I mean, it's kind of a cliche for like girls night, you know, I think is the trope about it. But it sounds like a delay.

I wish someone would invite me. Hint, hint. And here are a couple of reviews. This was very difficult to find. I don't know why, but I guess people. Yes. I guess the teachers don't usually insult people's work. I feel like that's rule number one, maybe.

Maybe the only rule. The only rule. Yeah, I think maybe that's the one thing that they want is to make sure that no one. People don't feel insulted when they leave. Yeah. Make the employees feel shitty. The employees? The customers?

Yeah, what you don't understand is you sign a W-2 when you start. And then they sell your artwork. That's the thing. It's actually like a mill for sending, I don't know, Ikea a bunch of artwork to sell in there. Okay. Hey, that was pretty good because, yeah, that's the only place that art would fit in.

Like mass-produced. It's hilarious. Or home goods. I don't know. Okay, paint and celebrate in Manhattan Beach, California. By the way, some of these places have cuckoo bananas names. That one sounded pretty normal. That one was pretty normal. I was going to say, I don't know why you brought that up. I guess some of them were just real. So I think my favorite, which I didn't

find a great review of, unfortunately, was called Tipsy and Ipsy, like Ypsilanti, Michigan. And it was like painty paint, paint and get tipsy. And it was something like that. And I was like, that's cute. But this one is called paint and celebrate. It doesn't rhyme. So I don't get it.

But anyway, Manhattan Beach, California. This is a one star review by Fiona. Okay. So she had rude comments about our appearance before we could sit down at our station. She also insulted the poor religious girl that sat near us when she wanted to add clothing to her painting due to her religious beliefs. I would love to hear that insult. Also, like, what is... What, you've never seen a pair of boobs before?

Like, I don't know, what could it possibly be? Insulting? I mean, I assume she probably just was like, I mean, whatever floats your boat. Yeah, why would they care? They don't know. What could it possibly be? Like, I don't understand. Insulting. I mean, I assume she probably just was like, I mean, whatever floats your boat. Yeah, why would they care? They don't care. I don't understand why anyone would care, would you add. She was super rude to anyone who couldn't paint and would take over their paintings. God forbid anyone's painting didn't look just like her.

I also hope they mean hers, because if it's her, then it means the naked lady they were drawing is the instructor. Maybe that's why she was so offended when they added clothes she's like you want to put clothes over true um but no i don't think that was the case i also went to college for studio art with a specialization in illustration and she doesn't even know the fundamentals of drawing forms or painting we wish wine was involved for some reason what they didn't have wine well they What? They didn't have wine at this. Well, they didn't say anything about wine. They said paint and celebrate. Yeah, you can celebrate sober. They didn't say something about being tipsy and ipsy.

What do you think? I'm just saying. You're on the wrong side of the road tracks. That's not it. Nope. The road tracks, yeah. But there's a religious girl there, so maybe she didn't want them drinking, you know. We wish wine was involved because she was so stuck up that some booze might have made the experience better.

It was like a family member was like, oh, I like your painting. And she thought, well, then I can teach. If our party didn't have such a great sense of humor that night. That's so mean. It's really cruel. Wait, this person has a sense of humor? They're being so mean. And she goes, oh, we have such a good sense of humor.

I'm like, do you though? If our party didn't have such a great sense of humor that night, we would have gotten our money back. But we thought, hey, this is a good memory slash story to tell people. But once I did share my experience, I was pushed by friends to make a review so others can be warned. There's a response. There's no way. There's a response by owner. Okay.

Hi, Fiona. I remember you and your mom coming in earlier this week. I am so sorry that your experience in my studio was so awful. I am surprised and, of course, very disappointed. You and your mom finished your paintings completely, and we even went an hour over time. To me, that always means that painters are doing and feeling well in our studio and that they want to be there. I wish I would have known just how deeply unhappy you were and that any feelings like these were brewing. This is when I hope that they're embarrassed because, like, they're being called out.

They don't feel shame. You don't think? I feel many of these people. I don't know. Yeah. But sometimes, no. I have been quick to react to things on the internet and then after a response felt like, yeah, I should have calmed down. So maybe, maybe I should give them, everyone, the benefit of the doubt.

That's why we're here, right? Yeah, totally. If there were any specifics within the issues you had with me personally, maybe I could understand fully how it all went wrong. I do not recall insulting anyone, much less with the kind of severity you describe. I think that even just one of these character flaws exhibited in public by any human being would have warranted a complete fiasco and certainly breakdown of the class. But that did not happen. Beautiful paintings by mostly novices are impossible to make if the environment is not

respectful and safe in every way. That is a staple of my studio. I would of course be more than happy to refund you your purchases or talk about your visit to make things better somehow. Please contact me. As for my ability to paint and teach, please look at all the 24 original paintings specifically structured and created for teaching these paint classes. Here's a link. And look at the many beautiful finished paintings on our Facebook page by many, many customers. And two of those beautiful paintings are your mom's and yours. Mila, owner and artist.

This owner's the best. I know. Or is a master manipulator. I know. Either has hoodwinked us beyond belief. I don't want to be cynical, but I'm like, halfway through that, I'm like, wow, this person seems too good to be true. What if they are? Yeah. What if they are just... And meanwhile, the reviewer's like,

but wait, you did insult. No. I can't. I think they brought up a really good point that like, if someone was actually, if they were being really mean and nasty like this reviewer said, this class probably would not have finished an hour over time. Yeah, and we all wouldn't have just been happily laughing and talking. Yeah.

And a sense of humor about it. It's like, well, maybe they made a comment and you took it as an insult or something or your friend did or something, which happens, but that's what communication's for. I almost feel like the owner is more perturbed by this accusation than anything. What did I say?

I don't blame them. I feel like she's like, what did I say? Absolutely. Like, I mean. Don't you want to, like, if there was this big insult, wouldn't you just say what happened? There's no way it's that bad where you can't write it out. Clearly it's not bad enough that anyone remembers what exactly happened.

Except that she did put a big, big cloak over the naked lady that they were painting. Which honestly might make it even creepier, cooler, draw. Oh, wait. Hold on. Talk to me. Do you think it's in that link of Facebook? I'd love to. I need to know.

Yeah. Okay, I'm going to find out at the end of the episode. So, I don't know if that counts since they were insulting, allegedly, someone else's artwork. Oh, it counts. Okay, great. Who cares about counting? Who's keeping track of any of this? I'm sure, as we know, there about counting? And who's keeping track of any of this? I'm sure, as we know, there is one mystery person out there keeping track of all our failures and flaws.

Flanfo. This is of Sip and Doodle, which I love. Sip and Doodle Paint Party. I don't know if I love it or I hate it. Sip and Doodle. I like it. I like it, and then it bothers me the more I say it. It's the whole Sip and Cab hate it. Sip and doodle. I like it. I like it and then it bothers me the more I say it. The whole sip and caboodle.

Sip and caboodle. Kitten caboodle? Sip and a doodle. Two stars, horrible instructor by Anonymous Z. We held a private party at our friend's house. The instructor, Hope, arrived one hour and 45 minutes late. She was very unprofessional and telling inappropriate jokes the entire time. She also kept taking over our

paintings and fixing things we were doing. I actually liked my painting and she came along and changed the whole thing. I was not impressed. End of review. Painting probably sucked. She's like, let's put a little cloak on this naked lady. Too much nudity. Sorry? Yeah. I don't know how I would take that. But then again, I have no delusion. Not that any of these reviewers are delusional in this way.

I know I can't paint. So maybe someone's help could be good. But also it could be like our middle school art teacher, which is what I think of in times like this. Because I think, oh, yeah, I remember that time we did this art project, but half of it was done by our art teacher because she had a vision for our own art. It was like unhinged. I mean, talk about unhinged. She would like, yeah, really go in and kind of do our own work for us. Honestly, she'd be great at this paint and sip thing.

Deal with people who, like, come in not necessarily being able to do art. And honestly, she probably wouldn't be phased by a single negative review. No. She wasn't phased by us in middle school. I remember one time. Wasn't someone stabbed in your class? Yeah, well, yeah. In that class?

Yes. Yes. With a pencil, though Yeah, well, yeah. In that class? Yes. Yes, with a pencil, though. Or scissors, sorry. Then somebody in my class made a picture, and it was of a basket. And we were entering an art show, and the teacher said, we need a title for this. And my classmate said something like, oh, an abundance or a cornucopia or something. Cornucopia, yes.

And teacher says, let's call it wicker weave. And then everyone, she was like, well, I kind of liked my name. And she's like, wicker weave. And then she printed out a thing that said wicker weave in all capital letters. It was, I just remember, I was like, this lady has her own agenda here. I don't know what it is, but we had a class where we would have to

spray paint jelly beans. That's what I was thinking about. Yeah, we would like make these portraits and then like put glue, hot glue jelly beans onto them. But so Renee and I would wander around

and eat all the jelly beans off people's artwork. And then at a certain point, we were like, wait, some of these are spray painted. That's why you go in the closet where she gives giant bags of jelly beans. That's where I would go to eat them. We did do that as well.

This was when they were on display in the hallways and we would just eat off of them. But we would always tell her it was Renee's birthday. And every single week, she would go, oh my gosh, happy birthday. Let's get the candy out. And we were like, let's test how long we can do this. So every week we'd go, it's Renee's birthday. She'd go, that's great, and pull out the candy. And it was just bizarre.

We were like, wow, does she really just, I don't know, is in a world of her own? So let's see, wicker weave. She probably wasn't in a world of her own. Right?'s see. Wick or weave. She probably was in a world of her own. Right? I'm very curious what she's up to now. Sometimes I look her up just to see what she's up to, and it's pretty much same old, same old. Sounds about right. Okay.

So this is of painting with a twist. And Patty sent this one in. It's not a chain because I've heard that before for sure. I think so. I think so. Where is this? Newark, Delaware. Oh. I a chain because I've heard that before for sure. I think so. I think so. Where is this? Newark, Delaware. Oh.

I'm just kidding. I was like, stop it. I have been to Delaware. Saw some good light. I saw like every lighthouse in Delaware but one in a day. I bet you they do painting classes of lighthouses, you know? Yeah. One star.

Oh, I know. I think about that all the time. What? Painting lighthouses. You think about painting lighthouses? All the time. Why don't you do it, I know. I think about that all the time. What? What? Painting lighthouses. You think about painting lighthouses? Mm-hmm. All the time. Why don't you do it?

I have. You have? Mm-hmm. On that planter at the birthday party last year. Oh, yeah. The plant's dead. The lighthouse. Shines on.

Is thriving. I don't know about thriving. It never thrived. It never looked too good. But it's pretty easy when you just do like, see, I did like barber pole red and white stripes, even though there's only one US lighthouse that has that barber pole style. Now there's two. Now there's two.

Also. But I feel like there's so much art with that. And I understand there are lighthouses outside of the US, believe it or not. But I have a very limited knowledge of lighthouses. Cool. Pretty focused on the U.S. stuff. I'm going to submit that pot to Mrs. Blank's next art show. And you'll be like, wow, this is a former student of yours.

Look where he is now. You've taught him so much. You've taught him everything. Also, I'm going to name it Wickerweave 2. Wickerweave 2. She'll be like, what a name. She'll be like, wow, what a genius name. Name it Cornucopia.

And she'll be like, no, no, no. Wickerweave. I just came up with that. I'll probably say Wickerweave 2. And she'll be like, it has to be 35 because I've named 34 other pieces Wickerweave already. I love it. Okay, so Patty sent this in. Painting with a twist in Newark, Delaware.

One star by JD. Trey, period, was not helpful at all. Trey was not accommodating, non-professional, and smelled of cheap booze. Thought if you were an employee, you weren't supposed to be drinking while working. But I guess at Painting with a Twist in Newark, Delaware, Trey likes to get a little twisted at work on the job. They really should start drug testing the employees. Not only that, but the Trey was drunk and stumbled around all the little kids trying to create wonderful art.

Terrible experience will not be coming back. End of review. So far, okay. What did Trey do bad, really? Stumbled around. Just stumbled? A little bit of stumbling? Yeah, which to be fair, our art teacher was not I don't think on drugs, but also stumbled around quite a bit. Yeah.

And I had a wonderful time. You know what? You know what I was just thinking as you were reading that review, what if we hung out with her as an adult? I don't think I want to do that. Well, I don't based on my knowledge of her, but my knowledge of her is solely from eighth grade. Yeah. And looking back, I'm like, that's not a person I would want to spend time with.

Is my eighth grade self your eighth grade self? No, that's my current. Because that's what I'm thinking of. That's my current self. I'm like, eighth grade me didn't know shit. Yeah, but I think we knew enough to know. I don't, look, I don't want to know what eighth graders think about me right now. Well, sure.

Because it's probably not good, you know? No, no. That's what I'm saying. I agree. I do. I just also. You're right. She sticks in our mind because she did some things that were not.

I sent you a picture. She's probably so much fun. I don't even care. I know. Right? Isn't she so fun? Listen, she was fun and I do feel guilty because I did like. Bully her?

Well, yeah. I did. But she kind of bullied us back. But no, as much in that power dynamic as the student can be bullying the teacher. Exactly. You pushed that to its limit for sure. I did. And it was mostly just to get candy.

It wasn't like we were doing anything really harmful. It was just harmful for our teeth, probably, not anything else. I don't recall her being a very kind teacher, but she's a very creative, bubbly person, I think. Yeah, definitely. And I'm sure she's well-loved, so I'm not trying to— Exactly. I think we might get along. Yeah, definitely. And I'm sure she's well-loved, so I'm not trying to— Exactly. I think we might get along. Yeah, maybe. You know, I could see it happening.

You know what? We'd probably have a great time— You and I had trivia, and we run into her, and we're just like, oh my gosh, you taught us in eighth grade. Come join us for a rosé. I think she would be like, who are you? And let us talk about art. And I probably have to ultimately admit that I kept just eating the spray-painted jelly beans. And she'd be like, finally. And then the police will enter.

No, she's like, I hear that every year. From former students. She'd probably have the sting operation. I'm finally arrested for defacing everyone's artwork. So rude. Oh, dear. The second picture. I'm sorry.

I can't help myself. It's just so weird to look back and see. Is that, when is that from? Is that a recent photo of her? I think so. She looks great.

I like, things, I picture her. She's not the rabbit that used to run in the middle. I thought, I think you're confused. No,

I'm just kidding. I'm kidding. No, she looks the same as what I remember her. No, she looks exactly the same. Yeah.

That's like, that's not aged a day. That's impressive. And just, I don't know, she looks so happy. I don't know. She's probably so happy and I don't know. No, she looks exactly the same. That's impressive. She looks so happy. I don't know. She's probably so happy and... No, she was a delight. Trey, however. Trey, anyway.

Sorry, back to Trey. That was my derailing. Was a little twisted at work on the job. There's a response from Hunter. I think we need to be lax with people doing drugs and alcohol at certain jobs. I'm just going to say itx with people doing drugs and alcohol at certain jobs. I'm just going to say it.

What does that mean, please? People live their life and get through their work day however they need. I see. Unless it's very dramatically affecting their work. Well, it sounds like it was cheap liquor. If they got the top shelf stuff, maybe we wouldn't be having such a problem. Exactly. How much are they paying this tray that he has to go get the cheap liquor?

It's just upsetting the state of the workforce, you know, the way we treat them. So true. So here's a response from owner. And so this person, their username is J space D, but the response from owner says Mr. Doe. So I think they were probably John Doe at one point. Oh, yeah, funny. Mr. Doe, thank you for your feedback. But perhaps you are the one that has Oh, yeah, funny. Mr. Doe, thank you for your feedback,

but perhaps you are the one that has been tipping back a few too many? Coming right out of the gate. I did not expect that. But I love that there's a question mark. They're like, well, I didn't say. Perhaps. I didn't say where I just said it's possible. Perchance. Maybe you do not know where you were.

Okay. Okay. I'm just going to let you finish before I where you were. Okay. Okay. I'm just going to let you finish before I comment. I love this. We do take all genuine feedback very seriously. So if you would like to reach out to the studio regarding an event you have attended, an actual employee interaction you have had, parentheses, no Trey works here, et cetera, we would be more than happy to address your concerns. Until then, thanks for the morning chuckle. End of response.

Which must be the most infuriating thing. Yeah. Like I wrote this really mean-spirited review and then they said, that made me laugh. And by the way, there's a- I am laughing at you right now. And there's a wink face emoji. That's hilarious.

Which you know ticked them off. Okay, so I was going to interrupt and say, I love when employers stand up for their employees. And now I'm like, well, they're saying this person doesn't even exist. So there's no one they're really standing up for. But I love that they're just like not taking the bullshit. What if there is a tray but it's spelled differently and they're like, there's no tray here. You spelled it wrong.

Never heard of him. Doesn't count. Here's a review of Canvas and Grapes I think that's why What? That's why I said I love these names Because they're like

Trying to like They try They're going on Thesaurus.com I assume And like finding any Sort of combo Because a lot of these Are taken

I don't know Where the Thesaurus Comes in with Grapes But yeah Well you look up wine. Yeah, maybe keywords. Yeah, keywords.

They just have a list of keywords kind of thing. Canvas and grapes. Canvas and grapes. And this one is in Edison, New Jersey. And this is a three-star view by a user named Crazy Cat Lady. And the title on TripAdvisor is disappointed with the whole experience. The whole thing? The whole experience.

And I need you to know there's a response at the end of this. Recently attended Canvas and Grapes for a bachelorette party. The staff tried very hard to liven up the room, but it was ultimately very cheesy. One, the karaoke is nothing more than someone pulling up karaoke versions of songs on YouTube on an iPad. There's no actual karaoke machine, and despite multiple televisions around the room, no lyrics broadcasting so that the crowd can join in with the performer, like all other actual karaoke rooms. Two, the painting process could have been done in 20 minutes, but with all the ridiculous performances squeezed in between the rows of tables and

excessive banter by the hostess, it took three hours. Three, space issues. The place is crammed so that more people can fit into the limited amount of room they have available. Claustrophobic when you try to get up and move around or leave to get some air and no room for personal belongings. Four, the blue light. You're trying to paint using a mostly blue color palette and they kept turning the white lights off and leaving dark blue lights on. Why would you do that? Five, I asked for more water to rinse my brushes as I actually know how to paint and didn't want my colors to mix and was told no by the staff.

Luckily, the two seats next to me were vacant, so I was able to steal their water buckets. Ridiculous. Art Evino may not offer karaoke, but if you go because you actually enjoy painting, at least you won't feel as though you wasted your time and money. End of review. First of all, the two seats next to you were vacant. You just said it was so packed that you could barely stand up and walk around.

Now you have extra supplies because the two people next to you are not there and you're using theirs. Anyway, this all seems a little shady to me. And then here's a response from Luis, the owner at Canvas and Grapes. Two years later and I'm finally getting to respond. Sorry we've been so busy with our sold out shows. Oh no, too bad. So sad.

Looks like you were the only one who thought it was that bad. That just means this wasn't for you, which is okay. The performances are part of the reason we are famous in the tri-state. I wasn't there that day to wow you with my sequin outfit and elaborate Beyonce set, so maybe that's why you weren't impressed. As the owner, I have a professional background in painting, sculpture, and installation and can guarantee you don't need to swap out your water. It actually prevents bleeding into the whites and lighter colors, which in turn helps tie tints, tones, and shades together. Well, those are professional color theory techniques, so you may not understand. From my understanding, as well as watching the cameras, my staff was not rude to you. They simply said you don't need to when you ask them to swap out your water for the fourth time and you wanted

to know if it would in fact ruin your painting. With all that being said, we are certainly an entertainment venue. The concept of paint and sip at any of these studios should never be considered or mistaken for a professional art class. Well, at least I certainly don't sip when I'm trying to create my artwork. The banter is what we people of color call having fun. Next time, perhaps read the description to see if it suits you. I definitely think Arte Vino is a spot for you. You should also check out Pino's Palette or Wine and Design, as they may be a better fit for you. May God bless you in all your future endeavors

and responsibilities. I love how all these like- Ruthless. Quick-witted, ruthless owners have all these paint and sip shops. I know, I'm like, I've been meeting the wrong business owners. Just like oh yeah? You want to come after me?

Like well fuck you and like rightfully so. I'll put my sequins on. Yeah. I love it. I love it too. It's just so surprising. I'm like the response is like just about longer than the actual review and just so much fun to read.

And it's like perfectly actually acknowledges their points and says, well, no, you're wrong. Yeah. Like the whole thing with the, I mean, not that I know who's right here, but the swapping out the water and then also bringing up the example that, or bringing up the fact that this person asked for it to swap out four times. Oh my God. This is actual. Adding the context that makes it like embarrassing for the review God. This is actual. Adding the context that makes it embarrassing This is actual color theory

which you may not understand. And like, why are you? It's so embarrassing. Also, if you think you're so good, why are you going to these? Sorry,

not why are you going to these, why are you going to these with this kind of attitude about it? Yeah. I think that's the problem because plenty of talented painters I'm sure go to these for fun,

let loose, and yeah, like theirs is going to probably look a lot better than most people if theirs is, I think that's the problem because plenty of talented painters, I'm sure, go to these for fun, let loose. And yeah, theirs is going to probably look a lot better than most people if theirs is. But don't act like it. Don't act like you're better than everyone else. You're all there for the same reason, to have fun and just do some painting. I don't know. Be creative.

Yeah, I mean, unless you are there to not have fun, which seems like at a bachelorette party, why else would you be attending? I like how he says, I don't drink when I do art. Do you? Yeah, I love that too. So at first, I have one more review. And the only reason I have this is because at first I was really struggling to find any where they were like insulting the artwork. So I was just looking up negative reviews of any place I could find. There's this place called Eat Drink Paint in Cincinnati.

Oh, they have eating there at this one. In theory, they do. Oh, eat paint, drink. Don't eat paint. Don't eat paint. But if it's edible paint, I don't know. Don't eat paint. Just to be safe.

This place has a one-star review on Yelp with two reviews and a 1.6 out of seven Google reviews. Oh, by the way, it's on a boat. I think it's on a – I kept reading reviews saying – Like on the Ohio? Where is this boat? Yeah. I kept saying like back to port and I'm like port. And then I looked and I guess it's on a – Booze cruise with painting.

I think it's on a river boat. Oh, wait. Okay. Can I just – I found a review that kind of gives a. Oh, okay. Yeah. Read it for context. I like that.

Yeah. So this is by Bella. One star. If I could give zero stars, I would. This was one of the worst events I've ever attended. We were only away from port one and a half hours. The food on the original advertisement was listed as brunch, then backtracked, and it was piss-poor snacks at best. Food was all over the floor where people had dropped it trying to serve themselves.

The food ran out, and we had to go back to port for that food to run out. The paint portion was unguided. We received elementary school supplies, no easels or instructions. Did the wine tasting even happen? I spoke with Edward, and he assured me at that time that a refund would be made and I would be made whole. Wow. There was one place which I don't actually know if it was this place, so I don't want to make that call. But it reminded me of a similar situation. But they said that the instructor kept calling the easel your thingamabobber. And they were like, it kind of gives you the understanding of how little guidance we got. Again, I don't know if it was this place, but I was just cracking up. I mean, this place

didn't get an easel, it sounds like. Yeah, there were no easels at all. Hopefully they weren't calling the boat that, the captain. Everybody hop aboard the thingamabob. I think we'll all fit. It's just like a car, right?

I feel bad because the business owner responds to everything and really wants people to have a good time. But I have this one-star review by a local guide. Here we go. The owner is just about as unprofessional as one can get. Just a few hours prior to a sip-and-paint boat event, Edward sent out an email full of lies and excuses as to why the event would no longer go on. Of course, he is not offering a refund or any type of percentage off our tickets for such a big inconvenience.

The rescheduled date is a month away and is on his birthday, which he claims is just a coincidence. But anyone with common sense knows it was done on purpose. Why? For what? Why? What a weird. What a weird accusation.

That's like the least sinister thing ever. Oh, no. They rebooked me for the owner's birthday. Why? What a weird. What a weird accusation. That's like the least sinister thing ever. Oh, no, they rebooked me for the owner's birthday. Like, what? First of all. Why would the owner want you to be there? Oh, that's true, too. Then they write.

It was mentioned by Edward in the email, which is weird, but I don't know. But like, not relevant. Maybe the email signature? No one wants to party with an unprofessional business owner with bad business practices on his birthday. I mean, I do. You know what? I bet that's not true. I bet. Guaranteed.

I bet plenty of people want to party with Edward. And by the way, Edward responded and was like, hey, please email me. I will absolutely give you a refund. Okay. I don't have. And like, to be fair, it didn't say anything about his birthday. So I'm like, maybe it was intentional. i was gonna say oh true yeah by not acknowledging it he's like hey ignore the birthday thing but no i i would have i was upset for this reviewer

saying that there was no refund i was like that's pretty shitty to do no he said here's my phone number email call me um but also just everyone with – anyone with common sense knows that he did this on – Again, why would anyone schedule a work event on their birthday? Like, you're saying he canceled it today, like a few hours before the event, and then rescheduled it. I was like, oh, man. He was like, I don't have anything to do for my – I actually really want to do this on my birthday. Like, what?

I really want to host this event that I do every week on my birthday. And we'll move it from the boat to a Dave and Buster's. And it's going to be a blast. Anyway, so that's that. I don't know. I hope he had a lovely birthday. Me too. Oh, my gosh.

Some of these things are mean. Somebody wrote, we went and it ended up being a bunch of trees with hearts on them. I don't need to pay to be inspired to paint like a 12-year-old girl. Yikes, people. Like, what do you, you want to go there and paint like the next Mona Lisa? I mean, calm down. Yeah, I don't understand. I'm very curious.

I would love like a... Like it wasn't manly enough? To have a survey of what people expect out of this event. Seriously. Going in, because my god. I mean, I'm looking... Trees and hearts sounds exactly what you paint on paint and sip. I'm looking through these and they're actually, like, really lovely. I don't know. Anyway, I feel like we should host a paint and sip night, Zandy.

Wouldn't that be fun? I think there's a perfectly good one on a boat in Cincinnati we can go to. On my birthday? I'm down. Maybe Edward and I have the same birthday and we can do it. We can only hope. Double party. Oh, I'd I have the same birthday. We can only hope. Double party! Oh, I'd absolutely go for your birthday.

Okay, anyway, thanks everybody for listening to our show. Thank you everyone for listening. All done. And we'll talk to you next week. I'm doing signing for all done. All done. Bye-bye. We'll come back with more. More. Beach Too Sandy, Water Too Wet is a Forever Dog production,

hosted and produced by Zandy and Christine Schieffer. It's edited by Brian Heveron-Smith, cover art by Courtney Aventura, theme music by Mavis White, executive produced by Mariah Nicholas. Forever Dog Productions is Joe Cilio, Alex Ramsey, and Brett Boehm.