Beantown Podcast - Beantown Juneteenth (06192024 Beantown Podcast)
Episode Date: June 20, 2024Quinn comes to you LIVE from a kayak on a pond to talk U-boats, Death Cab lyrics, and a big shoutout to his new favorite airline...
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Hey, what's going on? It's Quinn Davis Furness. Welcome to my show. Quinn Davis Furness presents
the Beantown podcast for who knows Wednesday, Juneteenth. What do you mean who knows? It's
Juneteenth. It's a federal holiday. June 19th, 2024. What's happening? What's going on? How
are you? My name is Quinn and this is my show. This is a quickie. Quinn David Furness presents the Beantown podcast. I am the creator,
first assistant to Key Grip and all that fun stuff. I'm looking at some sort of salamanders
swimming in the water right now. We're coming to you live from a pond of sorts here on the Oregon
coast, northwestern Oregon. I swear I'm looking at this I feel
like Jurassic Park he's swimming up my boat welcome to Jurassic Park this is
crazy he's definitely like a salamander kind of thing he's swimming and he's
just kind of moving around I can't really see what color he is I don't know
it's vacation vacation mode here on Quinn David furnace presents the bean town podcasts
Shout out to my good friends. Oh, there's there's multiple of them. I'm just gonna be fixated on these salamanders the whole time
Shout out to my friends in Pakistan. Thank you for making see 112 ranked comedy podcast in the great nation of Pakistan
There's millions of them. They're on the floor
Holy cow, do they turn in,
do these things like turn into frogs
as a tadpole situation?
Probably not, I mean, they look pretty big.
They just are salamanders
that live in the water the whole time.
Here's a poll question for you, email us, let us know.
Can salamanders live in water the whole time?
They're amphibians, right?
Or do they have to come out of the water eventually?
Because this one, I swear, I'm looking at one, he's just chilling on the bottom of this pond.
It's about a foot deep.
There's so many of them.
This is crazy.
I almost want to slap it with my paddle, but that doesn't sound very nice.
We are coming to you live, vacation.
Hello, Paki Stan. We are coming to you live vacation hello Pakistan thank you for making us the 112th
ranked comedy podcast in the great nation of Pakistan.
I'm floating oh they're all they're surrounding me this is crazy.
Yeah we're coming to you live from a pond surrounded by originally it was just a nice
little pond day and now there's like 10 gazillion salamanders.
If this thing tries to crawl on the boat and bite me, this could be a horror show.
There's just so many of them. This is nuts. Um,
what's happened in its vacation. We're here in Northwestern Oregon,
just hanging out for a week. Congratulations to sister of the show
Abby Furness on a birthday and a graduation from college. Very exciting
stuff. It's gonna be a quickie episode. I'm out here on a pond and a kayak or a
yeah kayak I suppose by myself. So we got a couple different things for you. This is a very unplanned, impromptu episode
recorded on my iPhone and don't even have any great topics. So let's just jump into
it here. This week, because that's the thing, you know, Bean Town podcast, even though I
take vacations, Bean Town never takes vacations. Even on a federal holiday, it's a vacation and a federal holiday
all rolled into one.
My question to you is would you rather have it, you know, be
summer reruns like Wheel of Fortune?
Or would you rather have me make the effort to do a shorter
episode and if you want to go back and listen to reruns, you
are more than welcome to.
Maybe you could do both.
Probably not. I've been
meaning to listen back to the Dune 1 and Dune 2 Predictions show from a couple
months back to see how accurate we were because we watched both Dunes two weekends
ago and I thought I had downloaded it for the plane flight but it did not
actually come to pass apparently. of plane flights. Oh, man
Listen discretion is advised when you're listening to this program number one will cage in some language number two this podcast which actually terrible
second worst travel day in my life
Through you know 20
29 years of living I've had plenty of great experiences and plenty of bad experiences and this instantly vaulted into the top five
So just to you know, it's one of of those things I don't even want to complain
about anymore. I already complained to American Airlines. I got nothing out of
it. No mule vouchers, nothing. Just got you know like Forrest Whitaker would say
in the shield he's pissing all over us. That's how I feel about American Airlines.
They're just pissing. If it sounds like I'm placing way too too much emphasis on the P and pissing, you got to go watch the scene if you
don't know it.
Iconic. I think season five
was Forrest Whitaker playing John Kavanaugh.
Absolutely fantastic character. Just killed it for an entire season and it makes a quick guest spot. I think in the next season.
He's pissing all over us.
Wonderful show The Shield. Oh man what a watch. 10 out of 10 would recommend.
So basically congratulations to our friends Ryan and Claire. Great wedding on Friday. Played music
for it. Went well. You know not too much to share there but you know it's a wedding as a friend's wedding it was very to be perfectly blunt with you I
was very stressed about this wedding and the amount of music I was going to play
for it it was not at the most relaxing thing so once the wedding is finally the
the ceremony is finally over you know piano is squared away it's in the
bridal suite ooh I got to see I got to go into the bridal suite right with my piano
right after the ceremony ended.
And thankfully, you know, there wasn't that much smooching
or anything else crazy going on.
But yeah, I was hanging out in the bridal suite
with the bride right after the ceremony ended.
So then I'm like, okay, you know, we got a drink, right?
And I was smart.
I knew I had to wake up early next morning,
but I probably had somewhere in the ballpark
of eight to 10 G&Ts across a five and a half hour span,
which is obviously a lot,
but not so much that is like irresponsible, right?
So I was chugging waters too.
The issue is, you know, the thing ends at midnight,
get home 1230, 1245,
and we got to leave the house by 530 AM.m. to catch an 8 a.m.
flight out over here. So you know with packing and showering and all that stuff
probably like three to four hours of sleep and not good sleep either. One of
those things where you wake up and you're definitely still half drunk and
I'll say this the hangover was not like a top 10 hangover but I've had enough to
wear you know if it's number 17 on the all time list,
it's still a little rough.
So basically get to O'Hare,
eat McDonald's, no issues at O'Hare, perfectly fine.
Get on the plane, American, I never fly American,
I shouldn't have known.
What was I getting myself into?
We board the plane, everything's fine,
boarding doors closed, we set up the gate for 45 minutes getting myself into? We board the plane, everything's fine, boarding doors closed,
we set up the gate for 45 minutes while they clean the exterior of the plane.
I don't know why they couldn't have cleaned beforehand, but it is what it is.
And then I'm thinking, you know, we have like a 90 minute
connection time in Phoenix Sky Harbor International Airport.
And I'm thinking, okay, this is gonna be a little bit tight, but I think we're still in good shape
Well, of course the time in the air is longer than what they projected to be which I feel like is usually the opposite
Usually it's quicker and it's a nice gentle surprise
This was like 15 to 20 minutes longer than what they told us then I'm thinking like, okay, this isn't great
We land as we're taxiing they make it the announcement., there's, you know, it was basically a full flight.
There's 55 people on this flight,
so a third of the plane who have connecting flights.
And they read all about the time, which was unusual.
Usually, you know, they don't address that sort of thing,
but we were not the only ones.
And so we landed at like 10, 10,
our connecting flight was 10, 30.
And we were like the last connecting flight. All30 and we were like the last
connecting flight all the other ones were sooner than that but I'm thinking
like they're like okay I think they said something the announcement along the
lines of your gate agents are aware of connecting flights not to say like oh and
they will hold the plane for you but just that they're aware of connecting
flights so we're thinking like okay we're gonna bust our ass through this
Phoenix Airport and it was not completely the other side but it was all the way across
there were like three moving sidewalks that sort of situation and they were
long ones so sprinted only to get there to the gate at 1020 and gate closed and
I had already done my research on the plane when we
landed just to see what the situation was going to be. And yep, there are two flights from Phoenix
to Oregon a day. You got your 1030 and you got your 830. So I went ahead and sat in the Phoenix airport for 10 hours. So spent a long time on customer chat with, I
don't want to get, I'm not going to try to get myself racially in trouble here, especially
with my Pakistani audience, but you know, it was, it was like Sri Priyanka or something
like that. And then I got transferred to a different gate agent or a different chat agent. These are real people mind you not the autobots
from transformers dark side of the moon
Or revenge of the fallen
Or the dinosaur one. I don't know what it was called. I never saw it once they switched over to mark walberg
I stopped paying attention
I think I saw all of the first Transformers all the
way through once and to be perfectly honest with you I don't think I ever saw another
one. Like probably saw parts of two and three but it just never came up. But yeah no one
is helpful. All I'm thinking is like what if you could like we are stuck here for 10
hours no fault of our own. It wasn't even like oh you should have got off the plane
and busted your ass and you walked instead. We busted our
HINEs.
Great word for a caboose, HINE.
And to no avail, they did not hold the plane for us, which seems stupid. They were at least three other elderly people
on both of our flights in the exact same situation, so that was a pain in the ass for all of us.
Yeah, if you're wondering, hey, what do you do
when you're stuck in the Phoenix airport for 10 hours,
well, I encourage you to go subscribe to my blog.
I'll tell you the exact web address,
beanetownpodcast.com slash blog.
Excuse me, again, that's Bean Town, Bean Podcast,
something like that, dot com slash blog.
And you can read all about our adventures
at Phoenix's Sky Harbor International Airport.
As well as a review for a brand new game
called Seven Wonders.
You can listen to my thoughts on that.
Fun time as well.
Made it eventually.
Lot of driving this week, but a lot of just hanging out a lot of drinking
I forgot to mention. I'm drinking a
Ninkasi NINKASI brewing company Northwest IPA
7% brewed in Eugene, Oregon. Thank you to Walt or Jack or Stevie little Stevie Ray Vaughan my dad
She must be loving me She my proud and do Little Stevie Ray Vaughan, my dad. She's my sweet love and man.
She's my pride and joy.
And my little love boy.
However that song goes.
Rip Stevie.
Whoever bought it, I don't know, but it's delicious.
Nice little black, black, I was going to say black clan,
but black clansman. Adam Driver, John David Washington,
football player.
So we made it and fingers crossed we'll be back
because Americans on my shit list.
They sent me a survey today.
And there's a scale of zero to, or one to 10,
and it was, how much would you recommend American Airlines to a friend or colleague and gave it a two?
I figured if I gave it a one it would just be like oh this guy's just like goofing off
We're not gonna take his responses seriously, but if you give it a two then so that's when it's like oh shit
He gave us a two
Having a nice week heading back in a couple days here back to the heat wave
If we weren't on vacation this week could it week, we could have done a heat wave episode.
It's been gnarly in Chicago from what I've heard.
The apartment's going to be like 100 degrees inside when we return.
The AC is not on.
Just killing it with those ComEd energy credits you get for using your AC less on a hot day.
They're going to love us, Prime customers.
This week on the campaign trail,
I was actually doing some research about before
and I was like, I have been out of the loop.
I haven't been watching Jeopardy.
Although spoiler alert, MegaChamp Adriana,
the archivist, archivist, archivist, she lost today
to a guy who's on survivor it's embarrassing I think it
was like 15 days was her streak dish 15 days something like that rest in peace
Adriana should be back for the tournament of champions the TOC as we
call it in the industry I just remembered I'm looking across the other side of this
pond it can't be more than I don't know
What do we think this is?
150 meters something like that
200 at most
I'm gonna have to get out of this thing. It's gonna be a pain in the ass. I gotta I gotta
Check out these salamanders first. I'm kind of in a cove
Cove I haven't found myself in too many coves in my life, but I'm
certainly in one right here. This could be a bay. I don't know. It's a smaller bay.
More of a cove. But I'm gonna have to paddle back across this lake and get out.
It's gonna be tough after three drinks. I feel like nothing really that exciting
happened on this week on the campaign trail. I looked up
What the two Juneteenth messages were today's Juneteenth?
Nothing that interesting Trump was pretty tame. Although we were
watching YouTube in the car
today and you know the next ad for the next video was a Trump campaign video and it was shocking to me how
Even with all the editing skills and
prowess we have in this day and age, 2024, he still has like his Trumpisms miss, you
know, misspeaking and stuff and they just leave some of it in there. Which I guess I
get it at this point part of it is like that's just his thing, that's the appeal. And his
fans don't really care if he, you know, does well at speaking English or not. He's more beloved because he can't speak English well.
But it's just kind of shocking to me.
I don't think it really matters.
This is an interesting thing.
We'll leave it at this for this week on the campaign trail.
I don't feel like there's that many people out there who are still deciding between Biden and Trump.
That's probably just my sheltered view because I'm not out there on are still deciding between Biden and Trump.
That's probably just my sheltered view because I'm not out there on the campaign trail
talking to everyday Americans, Joe Sixpacks, etc.
But at this point you literally had
five, six years of the Trump campaign plus presidency decide if you like Trump or
not.
And then you have like eight years of the Obama administration to decide if you like
Joe Biden plus his presidency.
So another four years plus his other campaigns plus he's been a politician since like the
60s.
So I just feel like you've had a very long time to make up your mind.
I don't even know.
And I know this is not accurate, but this is just my third drink
in, you know, shoot from the hip kind of take like what the what
are we even doing with the campaigning here? Like, who are
we swaying? It's like the voters in like five states, basically.
The rest of it doesn't really matter. We're talking Michigan, Ohio, Pennsylvania.
Now, Pennsylvania, there's no chance Trump wins Pennsylvania, right?
Oh, that's probably what they said for Hillary.
Let's say Michigan, Ohio, Pennsylvania.
Wisconsin, Florida, Georgia.
Other ones that are like maybe toss ups, Arizona.
other ones that are like maybe toss-ups Arizona I don't even know we should have brought a political consultant on here to help us out I don't know are there
other borderline toss-up states I'm forgetting about maybe like in North
Carolina really is North Carolina always Republican I don't know how that really goes
Anyways, that's this week on the campaign show we got the debate next week. I think it's my mom's birthday June 27th
Should have planned to get Jane a birthday gift while I was out here, but I failed on that account
So try again next year. Hey, I'm looking at some Foxglove
account. So I'll try again next year. Hey I'm looking at some Foxglove, which I didn't even, it wasn't even in my vocabulary or my realm of existence until
a year ago when Death Cab put out their most recent album Asphalt Meadows. I
guess it's been almost two years now. Time flies man. But I'm looking at it, it's
beautiful, it's purple, but it comes in different colors go Google image
Fox glove
If you have time and it reminded me as I'm looking at it here of
The great Fox glove through the clear cut which is like a spoken word song
So I'm just gonna read the lyrics to you
And I encourage you to go listen to Fox glove Through the Clear Cut by Death Cab for Cutie.
There was a man who used to live by the ocean but he never set foot in the sea. It made him
nervous that the water was always in motion and he feared the creatures who swam beneath.
Kind of like the salamanders. They are a little spooky like if they decided they wanted to attack
I would be slightly spooked. Alright back to the tune. And when I asked him how
he'd ended up there above a world he would never know, he said he'd driven all the way
across America, and when he got to the edge there was nowhere left to go. Then he repeats
nowhere left to go four times. He said that nothing lives long, only the earth and the
mountains, as he quoted Black Kettle's death song. The words drifted off into the emptiness
of this great
land where we never belonged. And while the frontiers are ever expanding, our living rooms
fall into disarray, and no one seems interested in fixing what they've broken. They just sweep
the pieces into the bushes and slip away. Repeat slip away. Slowly slip away four times. And
round us out here. And now he and I watched the Fox Glove grow through the clear cuts
Where a forest once grew high and wild for what is a funeral without flowers and ten thousand tombstones reaching for the sky
Reaching for the sky repeated four times. There you go. Great guitar solo to end the song absolute banger
Might take you a second to kind of
Jive with it gel gel with it, bond with it, but definitely
worth a listen.
I wanted to mention because I'm sitting here in a kayak looking at a salamander.
I had to look this up because I was curious.
What is the Olympic record?
I don't know if it's also the world record.
I don't know how many events these have.
I guess I think it is the world record.
I'm on the Wikipedia page right now. What is the world record for the fastest 5,000 meter
sprint kayak? And there's two categories. There's MK1 and MC1 and I have no idea
what either of those means. But let's just do MK1 because it's faster. So give us a guess how many hours,
minutes, days, weeks, years, whatever did it take Eric Viras Larsen from Norway in 2009 at
the World Cup in Poland to kayak 5,000 meters. Just threw that bug in the water. His life ended poorly.
If you want any more time to come up with a good guess, go ahead and pause. But
I'll tell you right now the current world record for a 5,000 meter sprint
kayak is 18 minutes and 4 one hundredths of a second. So he goes basically three miles in 18 minutes,
so six minute miles, pretty good. I probably couldn't go quite that fast right now, but
you know I'd probably get pretty close. I could get across this lake in like two or three minutes
Well, not unless I run into the fountain and that's got to be at least two miles. Well
Watch out Eric. I'm coming for your record.
I of course want to shout out our sponsors Home Pired Oregon
The man the myth the legend himself. He's right upstairs here
probably cooking some perch over the fire.
I don't know what he's doing.
Steve call him up 541-410-0316 or visit homebrightoregon.com or just go to beanthompodcast.com.com slash
blog because that's good too.
This is how you do cross promotional stuff I think.
Homebrightoregon.gmail.com is also a good place to contact. This is how you do cross promotional stuff I think.
HomePrideOrgan.com is also a good place to contact.
I got to ride in his InterNACHI double certified double insured vehicle and it feels extremely
insured.
Probably very safe for your home as well.
HomePrideOrgan inspection perfection.
Of course, you're good friends with Samson Q2U series getting a rare week off
here. I figured hey, if I'm going to take a vacation, why
doesn't Samson get to take a vacation too? So he's at home
catching up on the minor prophets of the world, the
Joles, the Hoseyas, the Hezekiahs. Does anyone have any
clue whatsoever what happens in the book of Hezekiah? Go ahead
email us at I dare you.
Bean Town Podcast, yahoo.com, let us know. Samson, God speaks, he uses a Samson. And
of course, a good friend, Zach Cutts by Q, looking forward to doing a nice front of the
neck shave when I return. Early Sunday morning, it's going to be wolf-like, like Michael J.
Fox, Teen Wolf, the movie where the guy flashes his penis in the basketball stands,
and towards the end of the film, great moment, turned into a man that day, happy Pride Month everyone.
When you need a fresh do something snappier and you call the experts at Cutts by Q.
So I saw Robin and I was thinking I wonder if these salamanders have any natural predators.
I don't know.
Allegedly there's fish in this pond, this two foot deep pond, but I've never seen them
myself.
I don't know.
A lot of bugs.
It's getting high time for bug time.
They smell my 7% IPA, my YIPPA.
So that's what I got for you. I'm not gonna linger any longer than I need to because I'm gonna head back.
We're gonna have some fish tacos and drink some more and play some games and I don't know, do other things.
Saw a cool lighthouse today.
Saw blobs of a jellyfish that may have been detonated by an underwater U-boat. Who knows?
And, uh...
Yeah. There were talks of sea lions, but nothing ever came to fruition, so who knows?
That's what I got for you guys.
Go listen Death Cab Fox Glove through the clear cut and you'll know exactly what I've been looking at
For the last 25 minutes and if there's a song that says spooky salamanders under the water
You could find that too and listen to it because I'd be evocative as well
Thanks everyone for listening to my program. My name is Quinn David Furness. This is my show Quinn David Furness presents the Bean Town podcast
I will check in on you next time for a big fourth of July celebration everyone stay safe stay sane
I'll check in on you next time bye
And screw you American
Yep