Beantown Podcast - Northwestern Basketball Coach_Quinn David Furness presents the Beantown Podcast ft. Walt Furness

Episode Date: April 7, 2019

Quinn is joined by brother Walter Furness to come to you LIVE to prepare a cover letter for the Northwestern Men's Basketball Assistant Head Coach position. Ryan Ligon also joins us as our special basketball consultant! What a show! Song is 'More than Words' by Extreme - I do not own it #FriendsofthePodcast beantownpodcast.com

Cooler if we did something we could really perform. Say, and I love you, it's not the words I want to hear from you. It's not that I want you, not to say, but if you only knew how easy it would be to show me how you feel more than words is all you have Then you would have to say that you love me, I'd ready no. You won't you do if my heart was torn into More than words to show you feel Let your love for me is ring I don't like this Yeah, I don't either I lost all you, man It's trickier than you think

All right So welcome to the Bean Town podcast for April 7th, Sunday, 2019. What's going on? Quinn David Bernice coming to you live. Welcome for some of those hot tunes, me on the guitar, me on the lead vocals. And then welcome back to the podcast, Special Guests, Walter Fernis.

How's it going? How are you? I'm doing all right. Thanks for having me back, Quin. So Maybe we'll get a I don't know record label. We should reach out to some of our people But I was pretty good cover of extremes More than words a classic love song My name is Quinn David Furnace. I am the host of the Bean Town Podcast, creator, producer, best boy, all that good stuff.

Coming to you live from 817 St. Paul Street. What's going on? How are you? It's a Bean Town Podcast, the People's Podcast. Your number one source for misinformation, probably. Don't forget to use hashtag friends of the podcast when you're talking about us on Twitter. We are at beantowncast, you can email us beantownpodcast.yahoo.com. This beantown podcast yahoo.com. And yeah, less than discretion is advised when

you're listening to beantown podcast podcast number one, occasionally sing some bangers and number two, this podcast is just objectively terrible. Although I don't know, I felt pretty good about that. So yeah, Walt, what's new? What's going on? Give us something to chew on. Well, let me just say if you ever want to invite me back on to, you know, sing something that we actually know or I know, then I would welcome that opportunity. But yeah, excited to be here in Beentown, USA. Been in DC for a conference this week. The big American Association of Geographers Annual Meeting, 9,000 strong,

now up here wrapping up the week in Baltimore, Maryland, Charm City. We had a great day yesterday walking around and ended with some sour sports losses, but all in all, it's been a great time and excited to be here at the bean town nexus as I hear some people calling it 817 St. Paul Street. Yeah, I feel that with the amount of money. I missed out on yesterday at Michigan State losing. I might have to start a new pledge drive fundraiser for 2019. But the 300 wasn't enough. We're going to have to ask for more. Thanks everyone who pitched in on that good stuff. So today, very exciting news coming out of Evanston, Illinois,

job posting for assistant men's basketball coach. So I'm poking around. You know, I'm putting out some feelers telling you know, Coach Kay, Calipari, Tony Bennett, both the coach and the singer, hey, if you know of any jobs opening, you watch, you watch March Menness, you watch the final four. It's a great time. The coaches are really into it. Tom is though, all the the stars are out and you're saying, I'd like to do this. You know, in addition to the millions of dollars these guys make, they just really look passionate and engaged in their job. So if there's any way that, you know, I could

sort of get on the ground floor or something big, I would love to do that. So, you know, my network, Adolf Rupp, aforementioned coach Kay, Jim Bayheim, they're like, hey, Quinn, you should check out North Western, legendary basketball program. They've won a game in the NCAA tournament, which is more than some schools can say. And they say, Quinn, check out job ID35833,

I think you'll like it. So I'm poking around him, doing the Google and stuff. And here we go. Job summary for Assistant Men's Basketball Coach. This could be my future. Read it. I'll give you the highlights. The Assistant Men's Basketball Coach reports

to the head men's basketball coach and assist the head coach and the coaching and training of the men's basketball team Seems like they said the same thing three times in that one sentence The position is a full-time appointment renewable on a contract basis may first through April 30th requires willingness and ability to work nights weekends and holidays Well in this economy you got to do what you got to do So there's some assistant stuff, development, conducting psychological preparation.

So I give a speech. I don't know if you've seen Hoosiers, but I have. I got some tricks up my sleeve, pregame and postgame. I'd probably have to do the press conferences. It's OK, I'm built for that stuff. Motivational approach to practice in games, light of fire under their asses, all that good stuff. Comprehensive knowledge of men's basketball and decision making, delegating authority and in setting and meaning objectives, all right, all that easy stuff.

Work with appropriate NU-DAR staff, don't know what that is, don't need to. Athletic communications, I am a social media influencer, marketing is my middle name. So this is all check, check, check on the qualifications. Recruitment at the Big Ten level, while I work for Hopkins, and we play in the Big Ten. So easy enough there. I already know the conference,

Northwestern alumni, all that good stuff. It's a lot of this easy stuff that I just inherently know. But I wanted to bring Walton on this because he attended Northwestern as an undergraduate. So he's kind of got the inside track. So he's gonna be helping us draft a cover letter today to send a coach Collins. And hopefully we'll get an interview next week.

But before we go any further and we're talking about the culture of Northwestern basketball, what are some things that come to mind that we're gonna wanna highlight in a cover letter today? Obviously experience, leadership, character, stamina, charisma, flexibility, love for all things northwestern. You got a bleed purple, as they say. I would say, Energismica is important as well. And finally, fortitude.

Fortitude. That's a good word. Knowledge of rules and regulations of the NCAA Big Ten Conference in Northwestern University. Also important things to have. What's your favorite mid-major conference in the NCAA? Mid-major. It's okay. Yeah, I think my favorite mid-major conference in the NCAA? Mid-major, okay. Yeah, I think my favorite mid-major is probably

the big west. Love that one, a lot of good, overlooked schools. You know, you got your Utah State Youngsville. You've got the University of Colorado School of Mines, Wyoming, Lutheran, often overlooked. Yeah, Big West, it's pretty exciting. You know, Cal, Polly, Long Beach, Santa Barbara University of the West. You know, just to name a few,

I don't wanna take up too much of your time here, but. And if anyone is curious, the actual schools in the big West are Cal Poly, CSU Fuller 10, CSU Northridge, University of Hawaii at Manoa underrated. That's actually the regular University of Hawaii at Manoa underrated. That's actually the regular University of Hawaii. Cal State Long Beach, UC Davis, UC Irvine, UC Riverside, and UC Santa Barbara.

So let's see. Every NCAA team championships, what does that mean? Cal State Fullerton's won five championships. I don't understand. I said underrated, I wasn't messing around. Apparently UC Irerton's won five championships. I don't understand. I said underrated. I wasn't messing around. Apparently UC Irvine's won seven championships. Well, apparently, Wyoming Lutheran must have recently

left my apologies. That's a shame. It's tough to get these big conferences and it can be tricky for the little guys to keep up. A lot of consolidation, a lot of ins, a lot of outs, a lot of things to work out with the sponsors. You know, I'm pretty sure Bacardi was a sponsor until, you know, some tidal 8 stuff happened

and then it was. I hate that stuff. I don't even know what the first tidal 8 say, but tidal 9 is always on my butt at work. Okay, let's start applying for this job. Let's get a cover letter going. Let me get my iPad here and set up the mic. Never in a good position.

So my back always hurts. And let's start drafting a cover letter. So I'm thinking, dear, who's the athletic director at Northwestern? It used to be, I think it was Jim Phillips maybe, but I don't know if he's still the AD over there or not. That sounds right. He always comes out of the football games

with the Morty Western, athletic director. James G Phillips. Oh yes. Still have it. Alright. Dear athletic director, athletic director James Phillips. Don't forget that middle J. That's good. He's a very formal guy. James J. Phillips. My name is Quinn David Furness. Now see, I gotta stop you there. That's where you're making your first mistake. On a cover letter, you know, you've got the formal header. You've got the name and address of the person you you've got the, you know, the name and address

of the person you are writing to, and you also have your own name and address. So it's really redundant at this point, too, you know, be introducing yourself in the first line. I think they're going to be screening for that. You know, put the address of the athletic director on the cover letter. That's crazy talk. Oh, yeah, you, it's the, but, but that's, you know, a vestige of, of former mailing times, you've got the two, it's the but but that's you know a vestige of a former mailing times you've got the two address blocks at the top. See here's what I'm bringing to this athletic director assistant man's basketball coach pardon me synergy vision futuristic so I don't I don't think Jim's going to be that happy

if I'm you know showing right off the bat that I'm looking to the past when I should be looking to the future. At no one uses addresses anymore. It's all emails, bitcoins, torrents. I don't know, I just don't want to seem antiquated right off the bat. What if we make this cover letter to tweet for them and if you really want to go that direction? Let me get underneath the bad. What if we make this cover letter to tweet form them and if you really want to go that direction? You mean get underneath characters. Yeah, well, you said synergy. Well, you need to find a balance and I want to go overboard. My name is Quinn David Furniss and you probably

know me from that one time I went to a Northwestern basketball game. That shows him off the bat that I'm serious about the sport. And that's something that I'm gonna kind of have to make up for when I'm writing this cover letter because if you look at my resume, you're not gonna see a basketball just as a word. It's not on the resume. So I think this is, people always say, you cover letter your resume, they should work hand in hand,

you know, highlighting what's on your resume, but going more in depth, but also kind of covering the weak spots on your resume. And that's really what this cover letter's doing, covering the fact that they don't have basketball experience listed on my resume. So I'm going to hit him over the head really with the fact that they do have basketball experience, because I'm going to say, my name is Quinn DeVirgin. She probably know me from that one time I went to an Northwestern basketball game. You also may have seen, it's hard to type and talk at the same time, you also may have seen my high school, scratch that middle school, basketball highlights on Facebook or wherever.

Oh, is there such a thing? I want to take this time to give a shout out to Ryan Austin Ligand, creator of Recon or Taiman Koso, the Curry Thomas podcast, who is actually my coach in middle school basketball. And you better believe he's going to be serving as a reference for this position. Ryan's kind of the ace in the hole. Maybe we'll call him later on the podcast,

see if he picks up, see if he can have anything he wants to add to the cover letter experience. But okay, let's keep going here. My name is Quinn. I'm not gonna read this whole thing. You also may have seen on middle school basketball highlights on Facebook or whatever. Jim, I'm gonna be Frank.

I'm gonna E-Frank. Exhibited period. I going to be Frank. I'm going to eat Frank. I accidentally hit a period. I'm going to be Frank. I live, eat. I'm using an Oxford comma and breathe, not die. I live, eat, and breathe. Hoops. That's another thing.

So something they're probably going to be looking for from their assistant basketball coach is someone who can really relate to the players from both the recruitment perspective, a psychological perspective, a motivation perspective. You know all these old white guys, they just don't know how to talk to the players. So you want to use word terms, words like hoops, young money, step back J, trap music, Fetty Wap, these are the types of things that young players these days coming out of high school, they're pretty familiar with.

Well, you have any insight on that. I was kind of surprised you didn't use the phrase, that's the move. And not as familiar with that. Talk us through that one. Really, you don't hear that? That's the move. Yeah, oh man, somebody likes, you know,

sort of the planning you're doing, like let's say you're trying to decide, you know, where to go out to have a really good time and Adam's Morgan on a Thursday night in DC. And someone suggests the place Madams organ, which is pretty interesting live music every night, it's a good place. You might respond, oh that's the move, that's really what you like or you like oh, that's the move. That's, you know, really what you like, or you like the planning that's going on. I'll take your word for it.

Jim, I'm going to be frank. I live, eat, and breathe hoops, and that's the move. I think I use that correctly. And that's the move. I'm going to tell you, I can't type on this iPad, I'm going to tell you exactly what you want. This is good. He doesn't know what he wants until he met Quent.

You need a fighter period. You need a motivator period. More importantly, you need your basketball program to start doing something. I can't type. Otherwise, doing something. Otherwise, Morty, we're on a first name basis, I've met him. Is maybe not going to be too pleased. Not going to be next time you negotiate your contract. See how I put the balls in his court? That's a classic negotiating move.

It's not something a lot of people think it's appropriate to do. It's not something anyone thinks it's appropriate to do. But that's kind of the maverick in this situation. Kind of like Mark Cuban. I thought you were going to say the late John McCain. That'd be good too, but I don't know. All those Northwestern people are elite liberals. I'm kind of, that's how, so a new paragraph.

I'm kind of a Maverick. Think Mark auto corrected to M.A.R.C. Mark Cuban has a love child love child with Dirk Novitsky but whiter that's a good opening line. I'm kind of a maverick think Mark Cuban has a love, has a love, a love child with darkness and it's a bit whiter. I like that. In addition, you should see, you should see the pants I'm wearing right now. I call them my step back jays. The comma goes inside the quotation mark, which has always been confusing.

I've called them my step back jays because when I throw them on, I just can't miss. And let me tell you this cover letter, just can't miss. All right, I think we're making good progress Walt what are your insights so far? Well, you mentioned that there's no basketball on your resume and and you know given that this is a great opportunity to sort of expand you know build

I'm kind of curious if you're going to talk about your basketball experience that you do have. The Baltimore City League. Now, I can't hit that end. It's always the space bar. Now you might be wondering outside of my middle school glory days, how much experience do I really have? Let allow me, that's a good phrase, allow me to introduce you to the Baltimore, it's called Volocity, Recreational League, below the A group that met on Thursday nights at Francis Scott Key Elementary almost spelled that right elementary school last spring oh Oh boy. Okay, now we're cooking with gas. Here is just a taste of my season zero points. You're sure you want this on the cover? I feel like, you know, there's the concept of spin. You know, you might want to do some spin. I'm all about honesty. Well, you should have seen me spin in the basketball

and my finger was like a globetrotter. Oh, boy, here is just a taste of my season stat. Zero points, a handful of cis. An absolute block machine down on the block, word play, a pen, absolute block machine, absolute blockchain down on the block. What I lacked in offensive talent. I more than made up for in bulldog mentality if I could type it. Bulldog mentality. Let's see what else do I want to say? Good looks and wild cat spirit. I'm going to capitalize spirit as well, I think, like that.

An absolute black machine down on the block. Like hang on, I'm going to add something. Like J-Lo. What I lacked in Authentic Talent, I made more than made up for in bulldog mentality, good looks, and wildcat spirit. Also, charisma. Okay, I think we're off to a good start. Let's see where we're at right now, then we're going to read some ads. Dear Athletic Director, James J. Phillips, my name is Quinley W. Fernes, and you probably know me from that one time I went to an Northwestern basketball game.

You also may have seen a middle school basketball high that's on Facebook or wherever. Jim, I'm going to be Frank. I live, eat, and breathe hoops and that's the move. Thank you Walt for that catchy phrase. I'm going to tell you exactly what you want. You need a fighter. You need a motivator. More, oh I misspelled that.

It came out to eye comma, pro-tentfully. I don't think that's a word. Chemistry. More importantly, you need your basketball program, your basketball to start doing something, your basketball program to start doing something. Otherwise, Morty is maybe not gonna be too pleased next time you negotiate your contract, next paragraph. I'm kind of a maverick. Think Mark Cuban has a love child with

Thurknovitsky, but wider. In addition, you should see the pants I'm wearing right now. I called in my step back jays because when I throw them on, I just can't miss. And let me tell you, this cover letter just can't miss. Now, you might be wondering outside of my middle school glory days, how much experience do I really have. Allow me to introduce you to the Baltimore Volvo. It's called... Volvo City Recreational League, Co-Ed B-group, below the A-group,

that met on Thursday nights at Francis Scott Key Elementary School last spring. Oh boy, here's a sit-taste of my season stats. Zero points, a handful of assists, an absolute block machine down in the block like J-Lo. What I lacked in offensive talent, I more than made up for in ball-blog mentality, good looks, and Wildcat spirit, also charisma. Walt, how do you kind of assess where we're at right now?

I think it's, you know, decent start. You want to think about, you know, tying it all together. You mentioned synergy earlier, so you want to make sure you don't stray too far from your roots here. But I'm kind of curious since I didn't get to witness any of these games. Do you ever get any technicals? I did whatever I needed to do for the team. Technicals are fun.

I feel like you don't see them enough, especially maybe in college NCAA, which of course is what we're talking about here. So how often do you get to see guy shooting free throw, and he's the only one on that side of the court man? It's just wild. It would be like taking a penalty kick and there's no goalie or something.

It's just as fascinating. Yeah, sometimes we'd have games where you're losing by 30 with about 30 seconds left. And you know, your only chance of getting back in the game is you light a fire under your team's butts. So I like to, you know, so the reps are all volunteers. They're not getting paid for this stuff, but I don't know. Sometimes you got to put them in their place. I like a little shoulder shove, you know, with like two fingers, they're not getting paid for this stuff, but I don't know. Sometimes you gotta put them in their place. I like a little shoulder shove, you know, with like two fingers, you're like, what are you

gonna do about it, ref? What are you gonna do? You get up in their face, puff out your chest. I don't know, just some tactics to kind of get their ruffs back on your side, because really when you're down, 30 with 30 seconds left, you need to score with the clock stopped. And so that's where free throws really come into play. But I'm glad you brought up technicals. They can be very effective.

Yeah, you ever have any scary experiences out there on the court? Like I could share a few, but I'm just curious. I mean, if you saw my three point motion, pretty scary. You saw my total season points pretty scary. You saw my total season points, pretty scary. If you saw my hair back then, pretty scary as well. So yeah, I had my fair share of moments. What about you? Well, regarding three-point motion, I'm not a great shooter myself, but you know, I've been known to Sink 1 every once in a while, but I had the pleasure for several years

when I was at Northwestern of playing on the single ladies, which was our intramural team. And we had a particular friend on that team who's three point shot was described as having sort of a like sideways orbit kind of like, you know, urnest, you know, almost the planets, you think about them having a vertical axis that they rotate around. Maybe there's a little tilt, but this one,

it was like the ball, both defied gravity and created its own sort of centripetal force at the same time as fasting. And I don't think he ever scored with that particular shot. But at one time, I was playing this guy who was about 6'7, probably, I'm 5'10. And I don't have a lot of moves, but I can do a little step spin every now and then.

And this guy got kind of up in my business. And he took an elbow and, inadvertently, to his crotch, release declaims he did. And right there on the court, as a senior in college, my life flashed before my eyes and see threatened to murder me, out loud. He did get a technical for that, thankfully. But that was a little bit of a scary moment. Yeah, if you can go to the other team and to, you know, pick an up 14, 15 technicals, you might be down by 30 and next thing, you know, the game is tied. So, you hear about double technicals sometimes.

I don't know if there's a word that means 15 times, probably some sort of Greek or Latin root we could make up a word but I don't know Cortesimol or something like that it's probably four. Pico Tis Tentetic or something. You ever go to those poke bowl restaurants? What's that like? No, I don't think I've actually been to those maybe once, but we were just talking about that Yesterday while we were walking around in rain to sit down for some dinner and you know, I was just thinking why Why don't these places double down on some popularity get some good sponsorship opportunities and you know have

sponsorship opportunities and you know have Pokemon tournaments within. You know when you're sitting down to your Poke Bowl which obviously sounds a lot like Poke Ball. I don't know. You don't need me to tell you that. You know how hard it would be to host a Pokemon Go gym in there or you know maybe even bring back some of the old fan favorites like Brock Lance Erica Sabrina So yeah, you know, it's you know, maybe even professor Oak, you know It could be the kind of thing like you've got this elderly gentleman who dresses up in a lab code and goes around But it really brings in the fan dollars. I think these pokeable places are really missing a pretty obvious opportunity here and you know I'm not in marketing but come on. Well you're the only furnace at least in

known recorded history to have completed in original Pokemon Pokédex. What was that like? Well I have to give a lot of credit to my one of my best friends at the time Chris Campbell, Chris if you're out there, hi. I was a pleasure of hanging out with Chris a few years ago but out on the West Coast but yeah Chris had Pokemon Red version, I had Pokemon Blue so you know with those two you can you can complete it, it takes some work, some finagling, some uh some sitting there connected with the the game link cable, um kind of looks like a weird USB cable but we did it it took a long time, it was a labor of love but You know kind of exciting little part of the game that you don't necessarily get to

Experience every day It's very good. What was what was the toughest Pokemon to acquire whether through catching or leveling up or all that stuff? That's a great question. It's been a while. There's one or two or a handful, maybe, at most, where you, it's not the barrier is not so much that you can't find them in your particular version, but the only way that they evolve to their next stage is by trading them to someone else. So it just involves some, you know, back and forth of,

you know, you gotta fight enough wild Pokemon or trainers to kind of, you know, get them to where they need to be and then, and then on top of that. You gotta trade them over to your friend at which point they do their spontaneous evolution. So yeah, that or honestly just kind of gaining enough ebbs with those stones. It's gonna be my next question.

Yeah, to get all the different iterations of them, kind of a pain-ass. So do you have to, because in the original Pokemon, you can only acquire one ebgame, is that correct? So, and there's what, four evolutions, three or four evolutions, an original Pokemon from an EV. I think there are three different ones that it can branch into. Electric fire and water. So in order to acquire three, even if you have a friend with the other game at some point,

you have to restart a game, I think, to get number three, is that right? I was thinking about this. I'm not 100% sure. So shooting from the hip a little bit here. But if I'm not mistaken, there were a few weird people you would run into. And I'm not talking about follow Pokemon players. Within the game, who would offer you bizarre trades?

Like they would want a very specific Pokemon for another very specific one Sometimes it seemed like kind of a worthless trade, but I think I'm not even sure if this is writing more, but I think there might have been one where you could trade for one of the types of EV So that's possibly and if so then you know, that's the move. See, we're called coming back together here. So that would be the way to go. But it's also possible that we had to restart a game. I'm not 100% sure.

We're learning lots here on the Bean Tom Podcast with brother of the host Walt Furness. It's like father of the bride or father of the bride too, Steve Martin, but it's brother of the host Walt Furnace, it's like Father the bride, or Father the bride too, Steve Martin, but it's Brother of the host, so it's just similar but different. Let's get into some ads here and then we're gonna jump back into our cover letter.

Again, we are well on our way to becoming an assistant basketball coach in Northwestern men's basketball program, which is very exciting, but to read some ads here we'll get back into it. Are you tired of selling your house for less than a quarter of what it's worth, all because you couldn't find a reliable home inspector in time? Well, Oregon listeners, there's good news.

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but it's also kind of a little reunion. Apologies, last week for the audio quality, we were recording from a cheap audacity copy of my work computer, so we're really a couple degrees separated from the norm. We're back on GarageBand today, we're back with dual wielding double action, Samsung Q2U series.

Never forget, when God speaks, he uses a Samson. Another shout out to the TV guide. It had been a little while since we got a new copy. I wasn't sure what was going on, but lo and behold, I checked the mail on Friday and we're back in business. So we got Peter Dinklage from Game of Thrones on the cover, whatever his character's name is in Game of Thrones. He's ready to go. I think Game of

Thrones comes back in like two weeks or something. People are getting real excited and I'm excited because now I know what's on television. So again, don't have a TV in the house, but if I did, I feel very informed. One of these days, I don't know. I'm not sure what the status of the Conners is. They said they were going to bring it back with Outro Zan. They're going to call the Conners. Steve Goodman, is that his name? John Goodman, thinking about Home Pride Oregon. John Goodman was going to, you. John Goodman was gonna come back. He's gonna be the central character, the centripetal force, if you will.

And I think it'd be nice if they did a spot because last season, one last ride, he's on the cover, he's wearing his red white flannel hands on his knees, kind of bent over, giving you that signature smirk, and it just says he's back. The Conner's returns to ABC this Tuesday, eight, seven central, six, five, west, whatever that is.

So just an idea, ABC, let me know. One more ad here, cuts by Q, Bob and weave. We all know the hairstyle, we all love it. But how many mid-town, Baltimore-based independent barbers can actually give it to you the way you deserve? Enter Cuts by Q. It's like enter Sandman, but different. Cuts by Q has been independently owned and operated since 1995, and is probably one of the better barbershop operations serving Baltimore City, Baltimore County, and Cook County, Illinois.

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brother of the podcast. Walt Furnace, come toos Live here at 817 St. Paul Street. If you missed the first half of our episode, we are currently in the process of crafting a cover letter for a position that was just posted Northwestern men's basketball assistant head coach could be a good opportunity. I've been looking to get into the coaching game. These guys make millions, I would like to make millions.

Also, I'm a big hooper, is what they say. So, we're crafting a cover letter. A little bit here, we're going to call Ryan Austin-Ligan. Maybe he picks up, maybe he doesn't, because I didn't tell him I was going to call him so that's what you love about live air you never know what's going to happen but let's get back into it. I'm not going to reread what we already wrote because it's long and some of you have already heard it a couple times so we're getting ready to start paragraph number three now so far we focused on my background Now, so far, we focused on my background as a baller. I told the athletic director exactly what he needs in assistant coach. I mentioned my charisma and my scoring drought that I'm currently in. I haven't scored a point since sophomore year of college, but I think I'm ready to get back in the game.

Got my step back, Jay-Zon. Got some wicked post moves. Been watching a lot of March madness. I feel pretty good about it. So before we jump back into paragraph three here, Walt, where do you think we should go next? What's our next move? It might be wise, since if I'm not mistaken,

this is an assistant coaching position, right? Okay, so perhaps it would be a good idea to talk a little bit about your relationship with current head coach. That's good. Doug Collins. I think I might be Chris. Well, it's all in the family. So here's the thing. I always wanted to start a sentence that way. Here's the thing. I am a family man used to be a good coach

too. So we all love our family, Family leads plural. The two weeks ago and you may have seen this on a poll for my friends asking them if I hit common instead of them, asking them if I should get a kid in 2019. The results were overwhelmingly unanimous. I can't type. I think we need to talk about the definition of unanimous. Overcoming. This word is the hardest word to spell in the English language. You have to make Kyrzusky.

Yeah, my Kyrzuski. Yeah Mike Kyrzuski. 50 what was it? 52 I think? That's better than Brexit. Bread it. Wanted to crack. Read it. It's better than Brexit. This displays how much I care for my family and also every Sunday we do a family chat that kind of resembles the ESPN program around my iPad does not like auto correcting around the horn with those guys from ESPN. That was a really well worded sentence. So here's what we have in this paragraph so far. Here's the thing I'm a family man,

just like your head coach, not R. I'm gonna leave it R, because it kind of assumes that I already have the job, and that's kind of a power play. Just like our head coach, Chris Collins is, because his dad, Doug, used to be a good coach too. So we all love our families. Too many. He's a lot of chaffy sentences early in this

paragraph. Two weeks ago, and you may have seen this on Facebook, I launched a poll for my friends asking them if I should get a kid in 2019. The results were overwhelmingly unanimous. 52 to 48% said, yes, I should. That's better than Brexit. This displays how much it cares for my family. And also every Sunday we do a family chat that kind of resembles the ESPN program around the horn with those guys from ESPN. That's really tight. Maybe just, you know, add a one word sentence

after that sports. Wanna make sure you bring it back to the topic at hand. It's a good idea. All right, we're ready for our closing paragraphs where we gotta bring it home. All right, we're ready for our closing paragraphs where we got to bring it home. I have spent a lot of time on the Northwestern campus. Didn't spell that right.

Northwestern campus in my lifetime. I did my graduate degree there and it took me almost 12 months. That's longer than a basketball season. It started to sound like a six-grade reporting. Well, you know, I'm a very transactional student from the hip type of guy. It's longer than a basketball season. First to say it longer than a basketball. It's longer than a basketball season.

Let me ask you this. Have you ever seen money ball? This is what I bring to the table. pits, looks combined with Billy Beans, analytics combined with who directed Moneyball. I don't think that was a Tarantino movie. I was going to say probably the Cone Brothers, but I think that might be wrong too. Bennett Miller, sounds like a basketball coach. Also directed Capodian Foxculture. Oh, I'm going to spell that.

Billy Means Annelace combined with Bennett Miller's directing. In college athletics, they are kind of the Godhead 3 and 1. It also shows that I'm religious. Northwestern used to be a religious institution. A lot of people know about Northwestern College, St. Paul, Minnesota, it's a Christian school. Basketball program probably better than Northwestern University, but I won't put that in my cover letter.

It's probably a source spot for those guys. I don't know. What are we thinking for for a closing sentence here? Well, you guys start with in conclusion. I like that. In conclusion, comma. This is really where I got to bring it home. This is where the bacon is made, as they say.

Let's make a phone call See if we can get Ryan Austin looking on the line He would know just what to say Let's just hope he picks up We're also going to call some else Maybe Jordan Peterson We're also going to have to call some else. Mm. Maybe, uh, Jordan Peterson?

I don't have his number unfortunately. Hey Ryan, how's it going? You're live on the Bean Tom podcast. Really? You're surprising you looked at this? Yeah, so I feel bad, but not really. Um, we, we are Walter and I are sitting here live on air. There recently was a job posting for the Northwestern Men's Basketball Assistant Head Coach position.

And we figured we'd throw my hat in the ring. So we've been spending the last 45 minutes drafting a cover letter. And we're kind of looking for a really good closing statement. And then once we get that, I'll read you the whole thing, because I think you're going to like it. But since you have a lot of experience

in the world of basketball and CAA coaching, you watch college basketball sometimes, and you coached me, if you had to come up with one really eloquent sentence to describe my skills, my abilities both on and off the court, what would you say? I would say, if you had to be an exoscient sentence, you would have to be that, you would say, and just do you really, you know, not a sense the circumstances, and I know that's kind of one of your conventional rules.

You can have them. It's just to have to be that way. Let me, let me, let me say this. So we, we had a prefix to the sentence currently in conclusion, but do you like and better? No, no, no, no. No, no, no. No, no, no.

No, no. No, no. No, no. No, no. No, no. No, no. No, no. No, no. That's a good call of fire as well. In conclusion, I can touch the net. It's short, it's sweet, just like me. I like it. I think so. We're writing this to the athletic director.

He and I go way back. I saw him once. I don't know. I think this can be good while putting the final finishing touches on the letter. And then we're going to read it. And I think you're going to like it. I don't need that. This is good for Northwesterns program. I think this could be another deep run for them in the tournament. Yeah, it's good exposure to not a lot of people have heard of Northwestern so. Yeah, yeah, that's my. Okay, Walt's signing, which is signing for me, federal offense, but okay, let me read you what we have so far.

Dear athletic director James J. Phillips, my name is Quinn Davis-Fernis and you probably know me from that one time I went to a Northwestern basketball game. You also may have seen my middle school basketball highlights on Facebook or wherever. Jim, I'm gonna be Frank. I live, eat, and breathe hoops and that's the move. I'm gonna to, I'm going to tell you exactly what you want. You need a fighter. You need a motivator. They're going to laugh a lot.

More importantly, you need your basketball program to start doing something. Otherwise, Morty, who's the president, is maybe not going to be too pleased next time you negotiate your contract. Next paragraph, this is my favorite line. I'm kind of a maverick. Think Mark Cuban has a love child

with Dirk Navitsky, but wider. In addition, you should see the pants. Should see the pants I'm wearing right now. I called them my step back jays because when I throw them on, I just can't miss. And let me tell you, this cover letter just can't miss. Now, you might be wondering outside of my middle school glory days, how much experience do I really have?

Allow me to introduce you to the Baltimore Volocity Recreational League, Co-Ed, B-group, Below the A-group that met on Thursday nights at Francis Scott Key Elementary School last spring. Oh boy, here's just a taste of my season stats. Zero points. A handful of assists. An absolute block machine down on the block like J.Lo. What I lacked in offensive talent, I'm more than made up for in bulldog mentality, good looks, and wildcat spirit. Also charisma. Here's the thing, I am a family man,

just like our head coach, Chris Collins is. Because his dad, Doug, used to be a good coach too. So we all love our families. Two weeks ago, and you may have seen this on Facebook, I launched a poll for my friends asking them if I should get a kid in 2019. The results were overwhelmingly unanimous. 42 to 52 to 48 percent said yes I should. That's better than Brexit. This displays how much I care. This displays how much I care

for my family and also every Sunday we do a family chat that kind of resembles the ESPN program around the horn with those guys from ESPN sports. I have spent a lot of time on the Northwestern campus in my lifetime. I did my graduate degree there and it took me almost 12 months. That's longer than a basketball season. But let me ask you this, have you ever seen Moneyball? This is what I bring to the table.

Brad Pitt's looks combined with Billy Beans Analytics combined with Bennett Miller's directing. In college athletics, they are the kind, they are kind of the Godhead 3-in-1. In conclusion, I can touch the net if you know what I mean. Wormley, Quinn David Fernos. I think so too. I was saying this earlier in the podcast, you know, you watch March, Manus and the Final Four and Tom is on Coach K. Those guys are having a good time out there and they make millions. So I thought, you know, if I'm looking for a salary upgrade, this might be a good fit. So. Yeah, definitely. Definitely. Absolutely. I tell you what, when I get the head coaching gig for Team USA,

I'm going to bring you and Kyle in as assistants. Oh, that would be the owner. That would be an honor. Yeah. We can go to the Olympics. They'll be in China again, just like every other year. Yeah. Exactly.

China. Yeah. Well, sorry to surprise you like this you have any parting words for the bean Tom podcast here were wrapping up Yeah, I was disappointed last night, but you know, it is what it is so I'm just not gonna eat for this week now without that money, but that's okay. Yeah. All right, we'll talk to you soon.

Yep, bye. Be careful, bye. Well, Ryan Austin, Ling is an absolute trooper. Hopefully we don't get sued for including him on the podcast without his consent, but I'm not too worried about it. So, there you have it. I think it's a very tight cover letter. It's solid. I don't really see any glaring heirs. We talk a lot about my coaching experience, my family man, mentioned the Mavericks, they are a basketball team. So, I don't know, I feel pretty good about it.

Well, what are your thoughts? You know, perhaps we could have included something like, you know, the phrase drive to win. And then, you know, maybe you could also start calling some car companies. That could be a good tie-in for the podcast. Yeah, it was good. These things are delicate. You don't want to get too long, but catchphrases.

There's a lot of good ones out there. We just, I think, kind of scratch the surface, but. Yeah. So rough draft, it was good. I'm pleased with the final product. I'm not much of a drafter, a draft dodger, if you will. So when I do a rough draft, and I was this way in school, too, I just say, give it the Michigan,

and just send it in as is. So all this revisionist history stuff, I don't want any part of it. So I don't know, that's about all I got to say, ran pretty long, but we've been shorter the past couple of weeks. So balance it out, in the yang, et cetera, et cetera. So any final parting thoughts for the fans? Well, I should mention that while we've and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on

and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and and so on and so on and so on and and so on and so on and so on and and so on and so on and so on and and so on and so on and so on and and so on and so on and so on and

and so on and so on and so on and and so on and so on and so on and and so on and so on and so on and and so on and so on and so on and and so on and so on and so on and and so on and so on and so on and and so on and so on and so on and and so on and so on and so on and

and so on and so on and so on and and so on and so on and so on and and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and so on and and so on and so on and so on and and so on and so on and so on and anything for the three to four hundred fans out there? Well, speaking of something for the fans, are you going to make this cover letter available via the bean-tumb blog? I think that would be a good idea. Yeah, I think so too. I think people want to see it. Maybe if they want to use it as a template for some jobs there, thinking of applying to. There's a lot there. There's a lot of material, a thinking of applying to. You know, there's a lot there,

there's a lot of material, a lot of versatility. So yeah, go check that out. Hopefully that'll be on the bean town blog pretty soon and you can stay up to date there with what's going on here. So yeah, check that out. Otherwise, I'm off back to Texas layer today. And yeah, I don't know. The book for the game on Monday night, the year

march is on. Yeah, I mark this date in history Sunday, April 7, 2019, people always talk about coaching trees and football, basketball, women's tennis, et cetera. Mark this day as the date, the Quinn David Furnace coaching tree kind of launched into orbit. Yeah. Space trees.

Space trees is the next coach K, gonna be my mentee? I don't know. I don't know. So I'm guessing that you're advocating for this as a day where we see sort of a new branch in the great coaching tree and not a sucker. Well no, I am the tree and the people that come from my tutelage are the branches. It's a tree all to myself.

It's like Bella check might have a tree, Tony Dungee might have a tree, John Wooden might have a tree. Brooklyn might have a tree if you ever read that book. It's really long. A tree grows in Brooklyn. Quintay but furnace and it tends to be podcasting tree. Now might have a coaching tree. If you go to Ireland where your step back Jays you're going to start hitting some trees too. Swish, swish, swish. Alright let's keep this under an hour for the fans. We got 45 seconds left. That's about all I got to add. Any 20 second words on your own wall? I don't think so, but thanks again for having me back on.

It's always fun, nice to finally see bean town in person. You know, we say bean town is where you are, but you know, there's something just magical about bean and the bean town nexus. I like to call it, so thanks for having me back. Looking forward to the next time we can do this, maybe a Chicago show in May. We'll see. I don't know.

Yeah, maybe we can do it live from the wedding. We'll see. All right, always a pleasure. Thanks everyone for listening. beantownpodcast.com. Check us out. We'll come to you live next week. you