Bellied Up - Wearing Camo To a Wedding #69
Episode Date: October 5, 2023The first caller is a truck driver who lets us know his biggest pet peeves when driving truck. The next caller is worried that her (maybe) future husband might wear camo to their wedding. The last cal...ler is Park Ranger, Charlie asks a lot of questions. Get yourself a "Road Huntin For Ditch Chickens" Hat Want us to come to your bar for a Bellied Up episode? Click Here
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Hey, everybody. Welcome to another episode of the Bellied Up Podcast.
I'm here with Miles, my very good buddy.
My best buddy.
Hey, Charlie.
Hi, Miles.
Charlie is also a fine friend of mine.
Thank you.
What are we doing today? Where are we at?
Well, we are over here at the beautiful exotic stenys in Millwalkay, Wisconsin.
We came in here at noon today, Charlie. Yeah. It has been bumping. Bumpin. People don't
work that much. The whole time. It's great vibes in here. And great bartenders, great bartenders. Natalie. Yep. Natalie's been great. She was
manning the entire 40, 50 foot long bar just by herself. Yeah. She was impressive. She's
been womaning that bar. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Thank you, Charlie. You're welcome, Miles.
I'm excited to take some callers today. I know. Yeah, I think we're
I feel in my bones. We're going to have some good ones. You know, yeah, I can feel that
as well. What are you going as for Halloween? I don't do Halloween. Don't be a don't be a
fricking. No, I don't. I don't I don't try and dampen anyone's excitement about the holiday. I just don't care about it.
What if you and I went to Halloween together as something? What will we go as?
We would I go as Charlie and you go as miles. That'd be great. I would just have to,
I dust off your old football jersey. I would wear the wrinkly assured I've ever seen.
I would wear the wrinkly a shirt I've ever seen. I would, if the party was at seven, I'd show up at 830.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
And then I would have four phrases that I would say in the whole time.
Wow, that's a sick burn.
What else would you do for me?
For you?
Yeah. I I what else would you do for you? Yeah, I
Work on my I tell everyone how much I've been bench pressing I probably bring like like on the bench press You use which is just a bunch of foam plates on like a PVC bar. Are you spray painted to look heavy?
you know and
And then I'd bring a bunch of bush lights and I go
and then I would compare a bush light with every other product at the party.
And I do product reviews and the bush light would probably win out, don't you?
Probably. Yeah, and you just be like, it's just so cold.
That's what I would do. So's a Charlie you're going to do.
Charlie and I are going to do a Halloween. Are you a Halloween guy? I mean, I like it. I'm
usually too lazy to like come up with a good costume, but maybe I'll think of it this year.
Maybe I'll think in advance, you know, I don't know why we're talking about Halloween already,
but I know I'm just in the spirit. spirit well people are starting to do their Halloween stuff. That's true
You're starting to get in the spirit the spooky spirit. What's been your favorite Halloween costume? You ever wore
Favorite one I ever wore
Oh, man
My mom made me a shark costume. Oh, yeah
my mom made me a shark costume. Oh, yeah.
It was pretty cool, shark.
Yeah, my mom made me a Fred Flintstone costume
when I was a kid.
Yeah, but definitely.
Yeah.
I could see it as Fred Flintstone.
That was pretty fire.
Yeah, that's cool.
And then cool that our moms made us costumes.
Yeah, they didn't happen anymore.
No.
No, the Amazon.
No, I know.
Too easy to.
Kids don't honk their horns at the semis anymore. I know. It's just
shout out to the moms that sat there at the sewing machine literally putting fabric from
Joanne's together to make you a shark or a Fred Flintstone. Yeah, shout out to our moms.
Shout out mom. Nice work. Heck yeah. All right. Charlie, should we get into some colors let's do it let's take some colors this is land in from Northern Illinois
land in then what's going on all just a home for work where do you work how
about you guys I'm a truck driver okay well land where yeah, what's your Holland?
Well, I'm a home now, but usually I'm on the left lane green train, you know, okay, I
Didn't hear you you're on the what oh, yeah
The left lane green train left lane green train. Don't understand what that means I
I got I you're in the fast lane you're moving grain. That's what I'm hearing.
Yeah, but what's going on in this though, know how to be in the
last lane going fast.
Okay.
You shut your dirty mouthland and you guys,
zip through those suckers like there ain't no speed limit.
We're just trying to follow that speed limit.
So Charlie, I will throw love for Chicago this morning.
And I can't confirm. I'm sorry that you're in Chicago that the Illinois folks do go pretty fast
in the left lane.
The left lane is for openly breaking the law. I mean,
seriously, do you guys even have police around Chicago?
What the hell?
Hey, I am not anywhere.
I'm not Chicago.
All right, we're not coming here to talk about that.
What's that?
Well, glad we set the table.
So what's on your mind?
Yes.
I'm from Illinois, northern Illinois.
I'm about 90 miles west of Chicago.
I heard that somewhere. And Illinois. It's a it's a great state. It's a good state in Illinois. It's okay. If Chicago would just fall off into Lake Michigan.
Little Chicago. I can just go. It can just go under like. Okay. Got it. Sink cold not even for hiding his animosity.
I see.
Yeah, yeah.
So everybody calls us fish and all.
I like to say we're pretty nice.
And I think Chicago pretty much sets the table for that.
And you don't really think about the rest of the state.
Yeah, I mean, that is true.
Chicago is what we're thinking of when we think of Illinois. Yeah, that's probably the only place you know. and in Illinois. Well, there are city flickers. They're all bastards. They drive like bastards.
They're all, I don't really know. I mean,
just the whole city, like I hate going near it. I hate going in it.
I like to say as far away as I can. And the rest of the state of Illinois is just relaxed and flow-based and doing what we do on our own and in the city it's just so fast
all assholes and well I don't know I think there's a fine line between Illinois
and Chicago. Well now you're sounding a little bit
country. You sound a little contradicting to me though because you started off
the call saying you like living in the fast lane.
Okay, that's just one of my work though.
We don't have traffic out here.
Do you ever have to drive your truck into Chicago?
No, I don't.
A garage truck?
I just go south.
I don't know.
What is the green truck doing in Chicago?
I guess I wasn't putting all these pieces at the puzzle together.
Where's the weirdest place you've gone?
What's the weirdest thing you've seen as a trucker?
First of all, I get your point.
Not all of Illinois should be lumped into our thoughts about Chicago,
which stem from the Chicago Bears and the Chicago Cubs.
Okay, that's the epicenter for the hatred.
That's the epicenter for the hate is soldier field
and it expands outward from there.
So yes, on paper, you are a fib,
but off paper, you're a packer's fan
and that's got to count for a lot and it does.
But so we've got you there.
Here's my question.
You as a truck driver, what's the weirdest thing you've seen?
Oh boy, I feel a lot of weird shit. I think the weirdest thing is just the amount of stupidity
in some people. Like that, it is just crazy weird how stupid some people are when they drive.
Give us an example. I mean, I don't really, I, so many people like to just hop out there like,
fly past you,
getting front of you, and then they slow away down.
So when you pass them back and it's just back and forth,
back and forth, or people that just pay no attention
to trucks behind them.
And that's what I'm getting into.
Give us your top pet peeves as a truck driver
about every other truck driver on the road.
About other truck driver.
Or about every other driver on the road.
You as a truck driver, what are your drive peeps
about every other driver on the road?
Sitting in the left lane.
If you're in your car, there's no reason
for you to be going under the speed limit.
You see a lot of guys with their campers and motor homes,
you know, they feel like they're pretty big super truckers
out there with their pickups and motor homes. They're going about 45-mile an hour in the right lane. That's a good
way to get in the accident. Just stay off the interstate if you're going to go that
slow. And the people that don't use cruise control, I can't tell you how many times I'll
get passed and then I have to pass the same person back and it's just weak-brog the
whole time.
Well, some my car, one of my card,
it, my old card does not have cruise control.
So it, not every car has got it.
And sometimes it's broke.
Okay, I like that.
I, it's like jiren out of Chevy cruise
that didn't have cruise control.
He's a true sorry.
Really?
Like it wasn't just broke, just didn't come with it.
No cruise control on the
Chevy cruise yeah so don't buy a Chevy cruise do you mean if you're paying attention you should know
what speed you're going anyway well no one's paying attention come on I mean you're driving for
so long yeah you're a professional you gotta remember the rest of us are just amateurs. Hey, I always get nervous when I'm to the side of a semi.
Should I be nervous when I'm, yeah, you should, you should be.
Yeah, that's a little, well, that doesn't make me feel good.
No.
Yeah, it's not supposed to.
Why should, why should we feel nervous?
Is that a big point spot for you guys?
No. So to be honest, if you, the whole wine spot thing is, it's more shit. I mean, you have so many mirrors. You can see just about everywhere around you.
You feel like the blind spot that we can't see you?
So why is it so?
No, but the.
Like my truck personally does not have like any blind spot.
Okay, so behind the truck, but if you're behind my truck,
you can hit me.
It's not my problem.
Yeah, okay.
So it's just a little bit of a problem. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. personally does not have like any blind spot. Okay, so. Get behind the truck, but if you're behind my truck,
I don't think you can hit me.
That's not my problem.
Yeah, okay.
So some trucks have blind spots.
So that's why you shouldn't go to the sides of them.
Yeah.
What about drafting behind you?
No, the whole thing, the whole thing with this being on the side
is you have eaten tired.
Those things blow out.
I mean,
oh,
close out when you're next to online, you could be in for a world of trouble.
Well, it plus getting trapped under one of those tires plus getting trapped
underneath a gas truck. That's the worst.
Oh, yeah, yeah. I don't think you'll know how that is.
A little Christmas vacation for you. So, so anytime you're next to a truck,
just zoom past it.
Just hurry up and get past them and you can float out at you.
Well, you just said that's an all goal.
No, no, I said if you're going faster than me, don't just crawl past me a quarter
mile an hour quicker. I said, right? Because that's going to take five minutes.
All right. Zoom by me. And then you can back off what you have any techniques as a truck driver,
where if a driver is kind of pissing you off, like you got any techniques to kind of get back at
them, maybe ride like two miles on the rumble strips, maybe splash some, maybe splash some draft on him as he goes by anything like that.
So I'm not going to state my company's name just because I'm about to say smart, but if there's a car sitting next to me and oh, that's another pet peeve, when a car sits next to you and they run you
right into the back of another truck. So now you have to slam your brake and slow away down. Well,
guess what, you're 80,000 pounds. you're not going to get right back up the
speed so it's frustrating for sure. But uh, so it's to prevent that what I like to do, go to the right side of my lane,
tether on my left, go to the right side of the lane, and you just kind of flush the trailer out. So then they think you're losing control,
and they hurry up and get past you because it gets scared. Oh, you bust the tower a little bit. Yeah, give him
a yeah, you don't cross the center line. Don't cross the center line, but just kind of flick the rear end
of that trailer over. Yeah, give him a little juke move. One two step. Yeah, keep on rolling. Yeah,
usually a little scarom. I'll either slow it down or speed up. Or you get a big gust of wind,
and then you go ask over T kettleCattle and that's no good.
What about people drafting behind you?
You know a lot of people get upset about people riding on you, but for me I could care less.
If you hit me, you hit me, that's not my problem.
I mean, that's honestly, I could care less if somebody's riding right up on me.
Do you have a phone number on your truck that says how am I driving and has anyone ever called it?
No, I do not and I yeah I mean I have had some complaints on me for sure.
Well yeah you're whipping up your whip in the trailer Adam.
Right and a lot of them, the boss looks at him,
he's like, oh, that car's just an idiot.
He deserves that, that's it.
They really don't care.
Because they know how it is up there.
Probably good, you haven't mentioned the company,
it's a name.
Defensive driving.
Yeah, yeah, for sure.
I'll light her note question.
How do you feel about when a car passes you
and the kids in the back seat are giving you a honk the horn sign?
Do you honk it?
Oh, absolutely. It's almost like in a it's kind of sad nobody really does anymore
When kids do I mean it's like in adrenaline rush you get so happy like excited. You're the star of the show
That is sad exactly
That is so you're telling me nobody likes to do it anymore. Yeah, kids are spending too much time on their iPads.
That's it. They're on their iPads in the back seat. They're not getting the trucks to
honk anymore. They're not counting the cows. They're not doing the honk sign.
No, it's a tragedy. They're not playing eye-spying anymore.
No, I mean, the categories gave me a have had two people tell me to do the arm,
uh, uh, talk my horn.
Maybe this year.
Damn.
And they were both like old people.
It's like a lot of like joy with me.
Look at Nancy's just bored with her husband and just got to do
something.
Give it a go.
They're listening to MPR radio and they're like, we got to spice this up a little bit.
Here comes a semi.
How do you do it when you do your honk?
Give us your honk.
How do I do it?
Yeah.
Do you give it two, two poles or is it like a
excuse me.
It'd do like really quick. Oh,
I'm a long one and then really quick.
I like that.
So I'm just going to sample a truck noise and put it in a song.
That'd be kind of sick actually.
That would be cool.
Maybe we do that.
All right.
How close is your truck to you?
Can you go give us a horn?
A half hour.
Yeah.
We got time.
Yeah. We'll hour. Yeah, we got time. Yeah, we'll wait.
Yeah.
I don't know about all that.
You can get a question,
no one only thought,
Rage,
are you grabbing your keys?
We're gonna wait for you.
And while we do that,
what's the craziest thing you're seeing at a truck stop?
And a truck stop?
Yeah. I mean, they're real, man.
What's a lot lesser for the kids at home?
It's pretty much the process that walks around a truck stop.
Looking for lonely drivers. Why do you know so much about them?
Yeah.
Essentially.
You know, we're friends. What, uh, what are their names? Typically?
Usually don't get that information. You don't get that.
I'm not important information. Is that a big thing at truck stops? And is it usually at like the gas
stations, a filling stations or the rest stops? To be a truck driver. I know it's usually by where you're parking. or the rest of to be a truck driver.
I know it's usually by where you're parking.
Yeah, and if you were a truck driver
and you were trying to avoid truck stops
that had lots of lot lizards, where would they be?
Fair question.
Uh, usually run down one in the middle of no way.
No Wisconsin.
You want to avoid it.
Go to like, yeah, pretty much.
If you want to, you know, I don't know, love truck stop.
That's pretty nice.
I need you to do much there.
You're not going to see any of the loves, but you're going to see some in Wisconsin somewhere.
Oh, stop it, Miles.
We have beautiful.
No, I'm just trying to alert everyone so that they don't have to run into that.
You find like kind of a rundown truck stop or what about a rest stop? and What shouldn't I do to attract one? Is there like a signal like you put your you put your like little
Sun blind down or oh, yeah, like the pineapple for slinger. I mean
What's the trucker equivalent to the pineapple?
I don't know. Yeah, I didn't tell you to do that.
How you do?
No, those lines would come after anybody.
OK.
OK.
There are more of a predator type of species
is what you're saying.
Essentially, yeah.
What is your favorite truck stop in all the America?
I mean, I'm just going to stay in Illinois, but definitely love their roller
dogs is chilling cheese, oh, yeah, you got to hit up a holiday.
I mean, that's special. I don't know. Quick trip. Pretty good.
Yeah, quick trip. That's what you're going to say.
But he but there's we don't have holiday out here. Wow, that's your biggest mistake. No wonder you guys are fibs does loves Josh. I'm not a
fifth.
He's very adamant about this starting to see why you got some complaints about your driving a little road rage action is
starting to come through.
Are all you guys talking to each other? I'm the
Are you guys talking to each other on the radio?
It's Charlie and I want to get into that.
What's some tips you can give us?
Yeah.
Into the talking on the radio?
Yeah, we want to get a radio.
Okay.
Well, Channel 19, that's the overall channel
that everybody's using right now.
I'm sorry. I mean, there's a lot. They don't talk over it as much as they used to. that's the overall channel that everybody's using running on talk.
I mean, there's a lot, they don't talk over it as much as they used to.
Oh, why not?
We're talking over about either road raging,
either road raging over it or warning people about bears.
Warning people also about lot lizards as well.
Don't go to this truck stop.
Oh, yeah.
Wait, did you say warning people about bears? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. a lot of the the
the
the
the
the
the
the
the
the
the the bears are on the road too. You know, I want you to get up. No, I want you to get up.
Yeah, I want you to get up.
No, I'm not.
I'm so I do have a.
Yeah, I have a quick bone to fit
that you guys.
Oh, yeah, third day.
You know, it's early in the morning.
I was like, oh, I'm excited to listen
to this next podcast, right?
Yeah, this is going now.
Yeah, why don't you ask Charlie about that?
Well, I didn't get it.
I didn't really get a fresh one.
I screwed it up.
All right.
And ask Charlie about that.
I'll give you a fresh one.
You know what?
We were pretty upset about it.
We worked so hard and to deliver you this free content every week.
And sometimes just sometimes we just need a week to calibrate.
No, tell them the truth, Charlie.
I screwed up the schedule.
Yeah, Charlie.
Is that the truth?
I messed it up.
I screwed the pooch.
I apologize, all right.
Well, listen, that's fine.
It's all I need to hear.
You can take your complaints to channel 19, all right?
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's all I need to hear. You can take your complaints to channel 19, all right? Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, there's another guy on this podcast
who's a truck driver.
And he wasn't lying.
You get a conference call going on the phone.
You get about five people in there.
You just talk all day.
They'll ask where you're at.
And you have no idea where you're at.
There's still a lot of it like based out.
That's awesome.
One of these days, if we keep having more truck drivers call in,
maybe we can just have just a truck driver episode.
Yeah, we show all the past truck drivers get on the line together
and just let them do the work.
We should try and do a conference call.
Yeah.
I mean, you should hear something like this stuff we talk about is
just so random and out of the blue,
it could have nothing to do with what we're
Originally talking about it just
wasting time
Well, thank you very much for calling in today. We really appreciate that appreciate your time
Sorry about the lack of the fresh episode. I will do my best not to screw the push on this
And you know, not trying to do the Midwest, not trying to do the
Midwest goodbye here, but I would like to say, I know, my old
is really a fan of this, but Charlie, I'm an owner of the green
bay back. Yes, you're the second owner to Cohen today. I am
also an owner. Do you have that? Do you have that framed in your
truck? It's in my office, actually, haven't offered that in my house for whatever reason.
Hell yeah, you do, because you're a hard work in dude.
You deserve yourself in office.
And you're an owner should have an office.
Yeah, he should have an office.
He's an owner.
Oh, yeah, it's framed.
There you look good.
Well, I will see.
I'll tell you that all it does is look good.
It doesn't do anything else.
I'll see you at the days all it does is look good. It doesn't do anything else. I'll see you at the Super Bowl, huh?
Yeah, absolutely. I think I think we got a shot this year Charlie. Hell yeah, we got a shot. I put money on it
You know who doesn't the Chicago Bayer. Oh, no, they got a shot in the head is
Yeah, Jordan loves sign the contract week one.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah, he did.
Yep.
All right.
Thank you.
Real good.
We'll talk to you soon now.
Yep.
Yep.
See you.
All right.
Bye.
But miles.
Heck of a fella. No, I'm a fella.
No, you only because he threw that last comment about being a fake owner of the
Green Bay Packers.
Yeah, no, you're a great guy.
I don't care they roasted me for not getting a new episode out last week or whatever week
this comes out two weeks ago.
Yeah.
He's a good guy, man.
I love the truckers.
We gotta get more truckers.
Tell your trucker friends, give us a call.
Hello, welcome to the Belly to a podcast. Who is Colin?
Fidel, yeah.
Okay. How you doing, Siddell?
Where are you calling him from?
I'm calling him from LaCrosse.
I'm doing too good.
Nice. LaCrosse.
Very cool. What is on your mind, Siddell?
Well, so my boyfriend and I are many years from getting married,
but we have talked about the day and like,
imagine what that will look like.
And the thing is, he wants to wear a full ammo suit. A full camel suit? You don't say.
You don't say Charlie's wearing camo as we speak. Yeah, I am. So, and I'm going to be honest,
it sounds like you're not loving it. So, I don't know if you're going to love our advice.
So I don't know if you're gonna love our advice.
I mean, I just kind of want to know how I can compromise with him.
So that we can feel and cooperate what you want
without having just complete head to toe camo.
Sit down.
Yeah, you want to have like say no more, say no more.
I completely understand you want to compromise here.
Okay, so right now as it stands, you're wearing a traditional white brighter gown.
You're wearing white.
Yeah.
And he is wearing camo.
So that is very simple solution. You just make your white dress blaze orange. And then you got gun season bow season.
That's a good one Charlie. Now back up a little bit before we get into a compromise, we get to figure out if a compromise is even needed, Charlie. Let's talk about Camel. A lot of times when someone's getting married,
there's a lot of trends that go around, right? Colored suits. My dad had the little thing that
went around his belly with a Cumberbun. Yeah, Cumberbun. I actually think you were a gold one if you can believe that.
What is he a royal member of the, like, the frilly thing that goes down the front of the shirt.
There's a lot of trends that go on with weddings and what guys wear, correct?
Yes.
Now, the goal, I think, is pick something that's timeless.
Yes.
And I can't think of anything that is more timeless than camel.
How many years have people been wearing camel, Charlie?
Since I can remember miles.
I think since they were in the cave, they were rocking camel, don't you think?
Yeah.
Rockin' is also what they were doing in the cave.
They were.
They were.
Don't come knocking when we're rocking.
If this cave's a are rocking, that's
the full phrase. But you probably should come knocking if that caves are rocking because
there's an earthquake, you know, and we got to get out the caves now where you want to
be in an earthquake. But am I wrong about Camel, baby, being the most timeless trend of
all time? I think you're right on the money with that one miles. So we have a timeless aspect to it
It goes it goes with anything especially white. So that was so unimpressed with what we're giving
I think she's kind of a little bit like you kind of got me there with the timeless am I wrong?
Did we get to there?
I don't know about that. Have you expressed your disdain
for this groom-garb choice to your groom?
Yes.
What did he say?
Yeah.
I mean, well, he, he's, there,
there's been days when he has, well, I don't, okay.
Well, what did he do?
I first he brought in like, he like asked his like Xbox friends.
They're playing Call of Duty.
They're playing Call of Duty for sure.
Yeah.
And what did these, spots, friends, say?
I think they said you're ridiculous.
Oh, really?
So he's got some friends that have been chewing.
Yeah.
And I think they kind of said just go with my key one.
I mean, that's also great. Yeah.
But we have kind of talked about, like,
when if you wore, like, a camo,
this,
and maybe have, like, a camo,
like,
hang for two.
It's done as a whole thing.
And you can have, like, you can wear it, like, you want to, like, like hang your shoes. It's just a whole thing.
And you can have like, you can wear it like,
you want some like cowboy boots too.
And you can add a camel on it.
Cowboy boots, I think that'd be okay.
Like camel accents.
Okay, I see you trying to talk about so far.
Why would it be so bad if he wore camel?
I hate camel. I hate camel.
You hate camel.
But I don't like it.
And yet you love him.
Yes.
And he loves camel.
Yeah.
And I am coming to terms with the fact that it's in my life.
He does have camo sheet.
So he's been sleeping on camo sheet.
I mean, let's take a second.
You knew when you were getting in there.
This is not a surprise.
Camo sheets.
Damn, this guy's cool.
When what does a gal do when you go to his house for the first time and he pulls back the
while it might have been a camo comforter as well but he pulls back the doofay cover and you see
camo sheets what it went through your head. I think I was like I don't know. And did you. Because I
did you leave? I did not mean no. Well, I think that's
kind of you. You didn't really set a good precedent from the start.
Yeah, maybe.
What if you told him you just need to wear a regular suit and that's the end of the story. What would he say?
I you put up a fight.
You definitely would, uh, he wouldn't just go, okay, fine.
Now another question. I do this a lot with Anne. I say that I'm going to do
something pretty ridiculous up until the very moment that I do it. And I don't
do that because I never plan to do it in the first place. But I just did it to
get a rise out of her to bluff. Yes, the old bluff
technique. Do you think that's what he's doing? Or do you think he's pretty serious?
I, it's mostly a bluffing sort of thing. He wasn't a big fan of getting married when I, when we
first started dating. So like, you know, I think that just when we talked about getting married, he was like, I'm gonna wear a camo so that you won't want to marry me.
So, you know, maybe, well, so hold on Charlie, we maybe have another caller that's called in before that you might want to have a conversation with that this sounds eerily similar Charlie. Is this fell up a trophy buck hunter by any chance?
He isn't. Okay.
Under the bus. Hey, he sucks. And we're always going hungry. He gets a dough max.
We have been together for three years
and he hasn't gotten up in that time.
No.
So why is he trying to wear a camo to your wedding?
What is he?
What is he?
He's got it.
What's he trying to prove here?
I'm not sure.
I know he likes guns you like guns and you like
it's like a it's like a it's not a it's not a very I feel like
mostly hunting is like a hobby. It's just another hobby. It guess not like his passion, but he does like, he does like, like
Camel, right?
Right.
But it would be kind of ridiculous if my hobby was model trains, and I was never able
to put a model train together and make it work.
That would be like, well, it's not really your hobby, you're not very good.
And on top of that, he's riding a model train down the aisle to get married.
Yeah.
He's dressed as Thomas the train down the aisle, but he can't put a model train together.
That would be awesome.
Yeah.
Um, okay.
Okay.
So not, not, not now.
Does he hunt?
Does he?
Is he now Charlie before we?
Not success.
Not too much here.
Not dog in him.
I'm trying to get some facts.
The thing is is I can empathize with the you go hunting
for the camaraderie, the goddamn camaraderie,
not so much the deer.
So I guess I am kind of back on his side a little more
that it's not about getting a deer.
It's about hanging out with the fellas.
Yeah, I agree.
I mean, look, I haven't got myself a deer in two years.
So I get that.
And I'm going at your first wedding.
What an asshole.
No, I did not actually.
So, you know, this is the stuff I got to put up with here.
Here's my, I'm trying to dive into this a little bit.
Does he go every year hunting?
I didn't even remember the response to that.
Does he go every year?
I think he did skip one of those years.
I think he didn't go.
But he also, he usually, I think he usually probably comes like, like two days out of the season.
Okay.
So now is he a duck hunter?
And what kind of camel are we going with?
That's a very good question. We have an assay. Is it duck pattern? Is it like a real tree sort of bow hunting deer pattern?
Is it desert storm? Yeah, is it? Did he serve in the military?
So he's a deer hunter and I think we're going for real tree because that is his sheep are real tree sheep.
They've actually got the little logo in that.
Is he truly deciding some money
by having a tux made out of his sheets?
Oh, I hope not.
Is he a little why not?
What are the sheets, not in good shape or?
Is he a well why not what the sheets not in good shape or?
If those sheets could
Is he a bow hunter is he a bow hunter? No, okay, So he's not even wearing camel when he, uh, it's not associated with anything, but it's, I'm going to be on the show. I think he likes camel for a call of duty.
But then though, but oh, do we know what kind of, oh, it's real tree, but that's not what they
got. I'm very confused. Yeah, I'm confused by this too. I think, okay, the point is what we've established here though is he doesn't have a hard
connection with the camel. You know what you could do. You could start roasting them a little bit about like
why are you wearing camel? You're a gun hunter. You know, it's not even the right thing. You know,
why are you wearing camel? Yeah, our fridge is empty. Yeah, sorry, honey, if you can't fill the freezer, you can't
wear Camo. You're going somewhere else with that. But miles, miles, miles, well, so and
what day is the wedding?
Oh, we, we're years out. We have not, we have not proposed to meet. We haven't picked a date.
We're 20, I'm 21, you're 22. Oh, we just, just imagined it.
But what I would say is don't blink because you may take a nap, wake up, and you're 25 years later, and he still hasn't proposed,
and he still goes hunting, and he still doesn't have any venison in the freezer.
And you and the other gal that called in, the other time,
wound up in a support group together, and it's going to be a whole thing.
So I would say don't blink.
They wrote a couple of things you about that. How much
what? Oh, yeah. So how how much
you like this follow scale one to
10? Oh, 10. And oh, wow, you're
test you're in on it. And if I asked
him how much to see like you, what
is he saying? I think you would
also pay 10 nice. And how long you
guys spend together now?
Three years three years from the time you were 19 to the 20 to the 21.
Is that two years 1920? That's three years.
Well, you guys, you got they got time to figure it out. He's blossoming though.
He's I think he is bluffing and I think that's why you maybe like a
little bit. He's got a good sense of humor. He likes to get you riled up and I think that that you're gonna probably win out in the end
What does he do is he a student?
He's a welder the other thing to keep in mind is like a camo suit
They don't just have like camo suits out there
Might have to be a custom deal
So he's gonna he's gonna have to start saving up now for it. Well, you should save it for the ring
Yeah, I should save up for the ring
Is it did he make any mention about me funny if you had like a
Camel's talks fun to banana wedding ring
If you had like a camel's tux fund, but not a wedding ring fund. If he were to give you a ring made out of deer antler, what would you say?
I think I would actually probably find that cool.
You'd find that cool.
Yeah.
I like texted their me and stuff like that.
So I think I would actually think that's gonna be cool.
You guys seem like a decent fit after all.
And also, we kind of dog this guy a little bit Charlie.
He sounds like a good guy.
He sounds like a guy I'd like to play Xbox with.
So I don't want you guys to do that.
No, great.
I didn't realize you guys were 21 at the start of this.
I thought this was a 28 year question, you know.
I bet you he's bluffing. I think it would be cool, you know, if you got on board with that,
maybe, maybe start, start, you know, start putting on some camo every now and again.
Look at your, check yourself out in the mirror. I'll knock it till you try it. And that Yeah, and that is a real fine tree, you know what I mean?
Maybe. Oh, yeah.
I just get yourself some duck camel. I think he'd, he's probably like that.
Oh, my.
Oh, that's what we're trying to help our buddy out.
I'm sure you could get some custom camel gear and maybe try and convince them to propose, you know what I mean?
Oh yeah, you could you can get them to propose pretty quick with certain camel item.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, she's like, I tried that.
Do you want them to propose now?
When do you want him to propose ideally?
I wanted to propose like three years from now.
Two years from now?
Three.
Oh, I did three.
Three.
Yeah, that's good.
That's good.
Now, give me plenty of time to feel this situation out.
You guys, you guys are young.
Don't worry about this yet.
Marriages. I mean, he's still, he hasn't got his adult brain yet. So he'll, he'll snap out of it. Yeah.
Or he won't. Then you'll have your answer. So there we go. Yeah.
Well, good luck in three years on getting proposed to.
Yeah. Thank you. Well good luck in three years on getting proposed to
Yeah, thank you
Awesome, thank you for calling in do you have anything you want to buy seller trade and why is it his camo sheets?
I'll get somebody to buy those
I don't know I think I think I would rather find a dumpster to buy the cheese. Yeah, it's not a, you're going to need to burn those suckers. Yeah, there's a demon that needs to be released
to go. Yeah, that sounded weird, but you get what I was going for. Maybe we got, they've
got this nice little hole in them. One this playing a knife I don't cut the sheet
I'm gonna be honest. I think I'm gonna draw the line at getting details on what is or isn't
And your guys sheets, but it makes a lot of sense. He was playing with this knife and
I'm gonna hold your sheets
Love
I was there
Oh wow, I didn't know that's a good role. Oh,
lot of friction. Well, it's been so nice to chat with you. Yeah.
All right, we talked to you as now. All right, what's up for you to now?
And your fiance boyfriend soon to be
camera wearing husband watch out for him.
It'll be tough.
What's he saying?
Camel.
Camel, you know, you'll see.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
All right.
Real good.
See you soon now.
Bye. Yeah. All right. Real good. See you soon now. Bye.
Bye, bye.
If I'm at that wedding, a lot of, where's the groomat?
You know, before you started.
Oh, you would, you would double triple down on that.
Oh, yeah.
God, this is, if I wonder if the groom's going to show up, this is kind of embarrassing.
Are they going to call it off? I wonder if the groom's gonna show up. This is kind of embarrassing. Are they gonna call it off?
Hey, has anyone seen the groom?
Why she marrying that bush?
I thought this was an indoor wedding
We would have a field day. I hope they invite us
All right, Charlie, take another call.
Let's do it. Folks, it is prime color season with the trees are
changing from green to orange. And just like orange, the color of
those trees, we have tippy cow orange cream, which is also orange,
just like those trees, the fall colors. And every fall, I do the same thing. I say, you know what I want is
some to match the trees. And I look throughout the entire liquor store,
thinking I'll find it, even though I know it's sitting right by my bedside all
along. And that's my orange tipi cow. It's a beautiful rum cream concoction
that pairs so well with a smoky fire
on a fall crisp autumn day.
Forget what you might call it,
your pumpkin spice, whatever the fric forget it.
Get yourself some tippy cow.
Tip it on back, tippy cow.
Ta-da, miles out of glasses, dang clank. Mmm, it's good. This is David. Oh my God. I'm on.
What's up, David? How you doing? Where are you calling them from?
Well, right now, I'm in Mississippi just as known from work.
Where do you work at?
I don't want to be too specific,
but I'm a small community, but I'm a park ranger.
Let's just leave it at that.
Park ranger and Mississippi.
Okay, David, the Mississippi park ranger.
How's that gig? Sounds awesome.
Honestly, it's a dream job.
I mean, I get paid to be in the woods.
I mean, how better could it be?
My God, honestly, if this whole thing goes south,
I'm gonna try and be a park ranger.
That job sounds sick.
You would be a good park ranger too, Charlie.
I think so.
I think so.
I would.
I love being out on the woods.
Whoa, maybe that's our first question for him.
Oh, yeah, sorry.
This isn't about me, my old friend.
Well, it makes a good park ranger.
Yeah.
And sorry, I have a terrible memory. Hang on,
is it Dave? Is that? Yeah, that works. Dave, works. Yeah. No, no, what's your name? Well, David. David.
David, David. David. Awesome. Yeah. Yeah. Well, to make it to park ranger, how afraid are you of
like wildlife? Not afraid. I mean, I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I
think it's a lot of things. I think it's a lot of things. I think it's a lot of things. I think it's a one of those. Neither have I, but you know,
sorry, go ahead. Would you run into?
Oh, well, do, um, I mean, bears, Bobcat.
I mean, you name it yesterday.
I actually found a Gator.
And she had like her little,
I've she's her babies were about maybe like six, eight inches long.
I mean, they were young. Wow. What are gator babies calls? Are they called gator? I don't know. Well,
you're a park ranger, David. You should know these things. I don't know everything. If
I knew everything, I wouldn't be a park ranger. He did get you there, Charlie. He got it. Bobcat scare me man. No Bobcats are fine.
Uh, mountain lines. Those would be scary. Bobcats aren't that scared.
No, they're only like bigger than a house cat and they'll run away from you.
Yeah, they're pretty cool though. Yeah, I see. I've seen one once crossing the road.
Oh, wow. Yeah, you'll see them on the road. Yeah.
Yeah.
They don't know how to drive.
No, he got across safe, though.
Yeah, Charlie.
So actually, I do kind of have a question for you.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
What's up?
I have not participated.
I will clarify that by the start.
He can't see anybody I know is listening.
Oh, sounds erotic.
Policy allows us to have you know, one at lunch, you know,
one little beer.
Oh, I know, I know nobody out that does that.
And I'm sitting here wondering, is it just a setup to try and fire people?
No, I'm surprised, though, as a park nature, they allow you to have beer at work.
I'm surprised, but no, I don't think that.
That's where it doesn't work.
At lunch at lunch at lunch.
At lunch.
At the clock, you know, yeah, I'm not saying which park range I am, you know.
No, that's why I have to put it from Mississippi park ranger.
He's not saying who he is.
That's a cool policy man. No, you tip one back. That's, that's, that's not a trick.
That's not a trap. That one, even if they, if it's in the policy, you got a court case
and you can own the whole forest after that. You can't. Hey, I like your play. I'm worth their miles. Yeah. Yeah, I know. Oh, okay. Okay.
I mean, I got it. I'm just skeptical. No, I wouldn't be. I would. There's only one way to find out,
David, you test that. Put it to the limits.
I mean, I'm too nervous to. I like my job too much.
I'm too nervous to, I like my job too much. Well, and honestly, that is kind of the type of honor
that I'd like to have in a park ranger, Charlie.
I know.
I'm sorry.
Yeah, to have a beer with a park ranger?
No, no.
I'd like to have a beer.
David, I'd like to have a beer with you.
He is honorable in that he doesn't want to break the rules
and I think that's a good feature to have in the park ranger.
And I'm starting to think maybe you wouldn't be a great park ranger.
Because you've already been talking about breaking the rules.
It's so long and salt David, I cannot be a park ranger.
I do have a lot of park ranger questions, David.
But I want to get through all the questions that you had for us.
I was going to one.
That was going to one.
I'm all here now.
All right, man.
I mean, you call the podcast with two guys on a Wednesday,
belly up to the bar, drinking beer.
I think you kind of know our answer is going to be then.
You should definitely have a beer or a lunch.
Take advantage of that.
Where are we going to say no?
Uh-uh.
What's the weirdest thing someone's done on your watch?
I mean, not physically on the wrist, but.
Oh, geez.
I got probably too many to count, but good.
I say the weirdest.
And,
geez, probably.
You see I'm a Florida kid in the woods, David. and, um, and, jeez, probably, um, you see him with four to two.
David any fornication that's not a bear.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I've got come up on campers doing some nasty and outside the
tent.
You just kind of keep going.
Yeah.
You just kind of ignore them.
You know, keep going.
I mean, you know, people are out doing what they want to do.
If they want to enjoy it, you know, I just ignore it.
Oh, that's good.
That was a question.
I didn't know if that was in decent exposure in God's country.
But you really are doing as they do on the Discovery Channel.
I'm the law enforcement, so.
It's kind of like, I don't deal with the law.
If they could film the Discovery Channel there,
you can probably do what they do on the Discovery Channel.
So, okay, what's the,
what's the weirdest, you just let them answer,
what's the weirdest thing you've seen?
I know, I think it was about to.
Ah, sorry.
Well, I mean, the weirdest thing I've seen was I was in a park late at night.
And like, there's everybody has their theories.
If you guys really want to, you know, well into it, there's a lot of
philosophies about scary park stuff.
But I was driving in the middle of nowhere in a park.
And I mean, it was miles and miles to the nearest place. because this is a remote one out west.
And it's like 2 a.m. at night.
And there's nobody around.
And we're just driving after a couple of us
are out stargazing, you know?
And we see a person just cross the road.
And it makes no sense why somebody would be hiking this late at night,
also in this such remote area.
You know, you'd be setting your tent up at night already, you know?
Yeah.
And so that was just like a little spooky.
And we just kind of like kept going back to our dorms after that.
I think that was the most like kind of out of context,
spooky thing I've seen in a part.
All right.
Let's just, where is this located?
the part.
Let's just where is this located?
I'll say that does out in the desert area part like around Joshua tree.
So not just with three.
Okay, but a desert park and you just saw someone how long get how long were they walking?
Like did you look at them after see where they're going? Nothing or was this a ghost? and I am nobody. Nobody. Nobody. You can see nothing. Can see nothing. Well, so you were you were by Joshua tree. Is that where?
No, he said he was. He just says how were you by burning man? Cause that could have been.
Could have been a burning man.
No, no, I didn't go to I didn't because I wasn't part of the burning man situation with all the flood and out there.
Okay. Um, so what do you think was going on then?
Honestly. yeah.
I think it could have been somebody that, you know,
it all will question or try to get the California.
I don't know.
I love the story there.
I love the story.
An old, an old, old prospector.
Oh, trying to walk it, still walking his way to kill.
Think about it.
Yeah.
Okay.
Did he think about was he gliding across the road?
Was he stomping?
What was kind of his demeanor?
It was just like a faunter.
It's like a casual like your head into Walmart, you know?
Yeah, he was just shitty about it.
He was just strutting along didn't even didn't notice you guys
And yeah, you saw ghost dude you saw ghost
Tell us where
Come on.
I'll leave the fifth.
All right.
Give us a second.
I can't say what is the most common thing you write a ticket for in the park?
I'm not law enforcement.
I do, I do a, you know, visitor services.
I do like story telling and stuff like that.
But I kind of are you are you telling us a story here, David? So, Vizier Services, I do like story telling and stuff like that. But, that's what I kinda...
Are you telling us a story here, David?
Are you twisting us?
We almost got a child.
Are you pulling us a ball, Yarn?
I didn't get that question.
I would never.
I was not born yesterday.
You almost had us.
What's the coolest thing you you ever seen an animal do. So this is actually not a story. This is actually the truth.
Oh, so you saw this story wasn't true. I want to believe it was real.
I'm going to let you guys ponder that one a little bit, but not this one.
Actually, the coolest thing I've ever seen an animal do.
I was taking a friend on a hike because they were visiting me and I was telling them, yeah, you know, you know, a lot of
national parks, you know, weren't always national parks until people kind of lived
in the areas or right by neighbors kind of thing and they were, you know, farmers
or lived on the land. And as I was telling them, I was leaning up against an apple tree
and I kid you not, I look up to say, you know,
just like this tree here, and I'm pulling up
to go look at the apples, and I was gonna pick one.
And there was a cement bell bear just like,
low, lay it in the lowest branch.
If I would have jumped up, I could have poked her.
And like, I actually woke her up accidentally.
And so she started clicking her jaw,
and I just kind of was like, all right,
so I just teach about, you know, wildlife safety, which come back way slowly. And, uh, yeah.
You, uh, you, you have found yourself a blue bear. So it was, is this a black bear down there?
Mississippi or? No, this one wasn't a Mississippi. This is a different than the Northeast.
What kind of bear female black bear?
Female black bear.
OK, I want to do a little bear training for folks out there.
If they see a bear, what do they do?
All right, so let's start with a black bear.
What do you do if you see a black bear?
Honestly, the first thing you're just going to do is start shouting
and just say, hey, you know clap your hands together
I often put a piece like a rock and an impugatory bottle and that's the best thing you can have to shake because any unnatural noise
Is gonna scare that bear away. Yep, that's like I do just shout out to the hay bear. What if I'm more of a power raid type of guy
Well, that also work fair question
They're fair fair fair question. Can you fit a rock in the bottle?
I yeah, if you find the right rock find the right rock
So am I supposed to make a rock?
You might want to find only in the location with large rocks that can't fit into a get power in I mean
Stop your feet clap your hands make yourself big and loud and scary make some noise because a black bear if a black bear comes to you
You can fight a black bear
Yeah, you don't want to run away. You want to stay in your ground. You want to shout and scream and get this thing. Yep
Okay, now. Oh, yeah, what about what about a brown bear?
Start praying start that's it. Oh, you got you got nothing like is bear spray
Would you even attempt bear spray some people bring out a gun? I don't do a gun. I bring out bear spray
But I still think I got no chance
Well, here's what I say if. If you know how to use bears,
bears, bears really great to carry with you.
Yeah.
You know,
just don't point it to you.
I'm in a Z pattern.
Oh, yeah, exactly.
How do we use it?
How do we use it?
You are.
I'm very similar to a fire extinguisher.
You want to spray like kind of a Z pattern for the.
You want to break down for the folks at home who maybe don't know this me and Charlie do, but how do you use a fire extinguisher?
Oh, well, that's the whole pass method right there. You pull the pin, you aim, squeeze and sweep.
Sweep, you say the, you say the Z pattern. Yeah, so like think of like a Z like the like think like when
you're spraying your bear spray spray and like if you're drawing the letter Z. Okay, and
why do you do it that way?
It covers more area. Distribute it, discred it out, but also to make sure you're getting
double back on where he spray first. And the other really important thing, the most important
thing and the reason why
I say don't use bears, bro, unless you really know, know which way the wind is blowing
because it'll blow back in your face and you don't want that. Right. Right. So let's
say you got a bear right in front of you coming at you, but the wind is blowing in your
face. Do you just talk about What kind of bear?
Grizzly.
Well, hopefully you don't get close enough, but yeah, you'll want to, if it's coming at you,
you're starting to fight, do you want to tuck up?
I mean, you can fight off if you can, but tuck up and protect yourself, because they'll
do some work on you.
How do you tuck up?
You get on your stomach and cover your neck, is that it?
Pretty much, yeah. Lay down, feel position. Okay. Okay. Yeah.
It's real facts. What if you see a polar bear?
Take some cool pictures. I mean, polar bears are pretty cool.
They are. But um, be the last picture you ever take. I think the odds of seeing a polar bear.
I mean, yeah, that's why I say you
probably get some good pictures.
But the odd is seeing a polar bear.
I feel like a very, very slim
for the average person.
Yeah, that's true.
Miles, any further questions?
No, I think you guys are nailing it.
So.
You got anything else, Charlie?
No, I really appreciate you calling in.
You've saved a lot of lives with your bare safety.
You gave us a great ghost story.
We answered your question absolutely, drink that beer.
And do we appreciate you calling in?
I don't think so, but okay.
Well, I think it's fantastic advice.
Oh, okay, all right. Not going back on your- I don't think I will, but okay. Well, I think it's fantastic advice. Oh, okay.
All right.
Knock one back.
I don't think I will be bold enough.
Well, you'll get there one day.
Maybe one day you get there.
Okay.
Then maybe you'll be brave enough to go talk to that ghost.
Oh, I mean, that's not the first weird thing I've seen, but it's been the weirdest.
So I'm sure there'll be more.
Well, we, we, uh, you call us back in and let us know anytime.
Give us an update on the weird stuff you see out
in our national parts.
All right, y'all take care.
Have another beer for me.
All right, we'll do.
We'll do one.
Watch for bears.
All right.
Well, Charlie, it's a good guy. Yeah, very good guy. I'm not going to lie. He kind
of had me, but he didn't really on the story. Did you? Yeah, I think he saw it. I think
he was either that or he found himself some peyote. Take some of that stuff you start seeing people walking
I I I wasca whatever I wasca
medicinal mushrooms yeah something like that
so that's another episode of the belly to pod
another one the book miles it's been a real pleasure
me to spend pleasure for me to sit here with you
and thanks for informing everyone about the bears I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right.
I'm sure you're right.
I'm sure you're right.
I'm sure you're right.
I'm sure you're right.
I'm sure you're right.
I'm sure you're right.
I'm sure you're right.
I'm sure you're right.
I'm sure you're right.
I'm sure you're right.
I'm sure you're right.
I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you're right. I'm sure you guys in the next one. Bye-bye.