Best Friends with Nicole Byer and Sasheer Zamata - Nicole Needs More Protein, Baby!

Episode Date: November 29, 2023

Hey friends! Nicole needs more protein. Sasheer shares a Twitter thread of a woman who got pregnant from a man who didn’t go through with a vasectomy surgery. Nicole shares a thread of a woman who ...shared her baby up for adoption. Sasheer shares a story of a couple who had a surprise baby on their wedding day. Nicole shares a story of a tiny woman giving birth to a big baby. Sasheer discusses past WWE wrestler Chyna. Nicole considers the thought of training as a WWE wrestler. Sasheer would support this. Nicole wants to know what WAS The Rock “Dwayne” Johnson cooking.  Nicole has a lot to say about a subpar experience she had at a Delta lounge. They do a Buzzfeed quiz and explore which Disney animated animals are the hottest. Plus, they both answer a friendship question about a falling out which led to communicating via memes.  This was recorded Nov. 6th, 2023. Sources: The Rock Finally Reveals What The Rock’s Been Cooking, and...Danghttps://www.gq.com/story/what-the-rocks-been-cooking Here is the quiz we took:https://www.buzzfeed.com/flowersandsunshine/dinner-disney-family-quiz Disney’s Hottest Animated animal characters, Ranked -https://www.polygon.com/century-of-disney/23768474/disneys-hottest-animated-animal-characters-ranked  Email or call Nicole & Sasheer with your friendship questions at:424-645-7003nicoleandsasheer@gmail.com Get access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using this show link https://siriusxm.com/friends and code FRIENDS.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hi, Sashir! What did you slam? Pure protein, complete protein shake and strawberry milkshake. Oh my goodness goodness so much protein i don't get enough protein so i started drinking protein shakes smart very smart i've learned i don't get enough of a lot of stuff okay all right is this like food specific or is this something else you're referring to. I'm talking about love, affection, protein. No, I'm kidding. Just protein.
Starting point is 00:00:50 Yeah. Yeah. I get that. My doctor was like, get more protein, baby. She didn't say baby. She has no bedside manner. She was just like, eat more, consume more protein. Goodbye. If she did say baby, I think that would also be bad bedside manner. I would love it.
Starting point is 00:01:07 I would love it so much if she said, get more protein, babe. Get it, baby. Baby, you got to get your nutrients in. Yes. Yes, you got to. How are you today? I'm good. Actually, baby reminded me of this twitter thread that i saw i can't
Starting point is 00:01:28 remember if we talked about it or not where a woman was talking about her friend who had an iud and then wait is that no no her friends Her friend's husband got a vasectomy. And then the friend got pregnant and was like, how did this happen? And so the person who tweeted was like, thoughts? What do you think happened? And then wrote, update, he didn't go to the follow-up appointment. He just didn't get it. And, like, I feel like a punishment is needed in that kind of regard.
Starting point is 00:02:14 Right? Yeah. Take his dick. Cut the dick off. Take his dick. You can't be doing that. Yeah. You absolutely can't say, I got a vasectomy, not got a vasectomy not get the vasectomy and then start shooting up the club truly you can't do that
Starting point is 00:02:31 that's wild did you i sent you this on instagram it was a woman who was like i was adopted here's my backstory my mom was married to a white man, had an affair with a black man. The white man forgave her, but they wanted to cover up her pregnancy. So they told their friends and family that she was pregnant. And then when the baby came, she told all her friends and family that the baby died. And in the meantime, she went to this like support group, I guess, of other women who have cheated and are having babies. I don't know what kind of support group that is but um so then the people went to the support group and they were like uh i want to adopt a baby so then she gave the the couple in the support group the
Starting point is 00:03:18 baby oh i mean that's kind of handy isn't that wild automate a couple that wants your baby but that is wild to tell also to tell everyone that your baby died right isn't that grim very grim and now you have to fake mourn a real baby yeah and that's that's nuts you can't do that yeah i saw a different tweet because we stay on the internet and all we do is be on the internet and this woman is a wedding planner and she was telling a story about how she was planning a wedding for this couple. And then the day before the wedding, like the day of the rehearsal dinner, the groom called the wedding planner. I was like, hey, don't freak out. We're at the hospital.
Starting point is 00:04:15 Everyone's fine. And the wedding planner was like, okay, what happened? And he's like, so the bride had a baby. And the wedding planner's like, okay okay weird that you guys didn't tell me she was pregnant he was like we didn't know we didn't know she was pregnant she just had a baby yeah it was like one of those like bathroom stories where she like went to the bathroom and then out came a baby out a baby yes oh And apparently she was 42 weeks pregnant. So she was overdue. And she was like, I had no, and she's like, I was still getting my period. I had an IUD
Starting point is 00:04:52 and like truly felt no symptoms of a pregnancy leading up to this. And then, and she only gained eight pounds. And she was like, I thought it was wedding dress. Turned out it was a baby. Oh my word. How wild. I would be livid if I was secret pregnant and shot out a baby. I know. Cause you're not even prepared for it. No, I didn't buy a bassinet.
Starting point is 00:05:19 No. I don't have any suits for Deuteronomy. I don't have anything. We need to stock up on suits stat i gotta get white white suits for deuteronomy remember we went to that we went to this wild thrift store a little bit ago and they had white suits and you turned around you're like deuteronomy you're like yes a million of those for deuteronomy. Please. I mean, it's the only choice to dress up a baby in a suit. You must. It is funny.
Starting point is 00:05:51 It's so funny. It's so funny. Again, we stay on the internet. I didn't send this to you, but there was this woman who was like 90 pounds soaking wet. And it was one of those TikToks where it said the words and she's dancing. She was like, I thought since I only gained six pounds during my pregnancy i'd have a tiny baby and then she brings out the baby and the baby is like half her fucking size it is wild it's upsetting imagine lugging around something that's half your size and you can't you can't just leave it you gotta bring it with you
Starting point is 00:06:26 hold on i know her tiktok i'm gonna tell you what her fucking tiktok is it's sick and then a bunch of people i guess were telling her that her baby was too big because she was like you're body shaming a one-year-old and i was like yup i sure am because it's too big okay hold on let me find this this huge baby okay it's that mom kayla on tiktok look at this gigantic child that's a one-year-old yes that looks like a four-year-old or it's such a big baby but then it's like i don't know what the dad looks like the dad has to be like a basketball player or part of the Amazon kingdom. Right? Those are them big bitches?
Starting point is 00:07:09 Yes. Yeah. Amazonian. Is it Wonder Woman in Amazon? I think so. Or something like that. Or like it's like some sort of, you know, fake society of gladiator type women or something like that they should have gotten a bigger girl gal gadot is not amazonian dare i say regular who who who is a
Starting point is 00:07:39 big girl who could have done it uh i would have gone through the wwe and see what was up there okay found me a lady rock a pebble um jordan sent uh wonder woman's origin story is from the golden to bronze age relates to relates that she was sculpted from clay by her mother queen hippolyta and was given a life as an amazon along with superhuman powers as gifts by the greek gods okay her mom is hippolyta that's a big bitch she's named she's a hippo hippo is in there give her let's see some big bitches stomping around i feel like back in the day not that I ever pay attention to like wrestling but I do remember there was one woman I think her name was Chyna
Starting point is 00:08:30 or something who was like massive like muscles galore like truly as big as the men and kicking ass all the time she has since passed away I think I did know that I think I remember that oh yeah there's
Starting point is 00:08:47 pictures oh yeah china with a y ninth one china with a y um who's a current there's uh there's like a maybe theogan has a daughter. Brooke? She's probably, yeah, Brooke Hogan. She's probably big. Wait, these ladies don't seem as big as I want them to be. I know. I think everyone, like, got smaller
Starting point is 00:09:16 because they want women to be smaller. They want to shrink us. I don't want that. I mean, they still look buff as hell, but not, i want china i want a big big big one big big big one yeah that's how i'm gonna describe it and leave it at that i want a big big big one charlotte give me like six four rick flair's daughter oh charlotte flair she does look really tall. She does look huge.
Starting point is 00:09:46 Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. Yeah, give me some broad shoulders, muscles. Maybe I'll start training to be a WWE superstar. I would really love it. That'd be very cool. Well, I've already got the protein. Just ask John Cena to use his connections to get you in there.
Starting point is 00:10:10 John, let me be a WWE superstar, please. He would be happy to help you with your journey. What a wild phone call that would be. He'd be like, what? Oh, look at this cutie. Bianca Belair. She she's cute she's pretty again i'm looking for bigger bigger that belt looks like a watch on her it really does. Yeah, big women.
Starting point is 00:10:46 Thank you, Judith. Ooh, Karma. I like her. She looks tough. Ooh, wait. Oh, yeah, Nia Jax. She was a big girl. I think she has left the WWE.
Starting point is 00:11:03 Dough drop? Dough drop? Dough drop do drop do drop nice do i need to get into wrestling i mean that'd be a fun journey for you fun side journey for you i just become a wrestler i feel like ron funchess was wrestling at one point maybe i know he's like a huge wrestling fan yeah yeah yeah you guys ron did how to get in there I feel like Ron Funches was wrestling at one point. Maybe. I know he's like a huge wrestling fan. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:28 Yeah. You guys, Ron, did you know how to get in there too? I mean, wrestling is just fun. For a hot second in high school, I was into wrestling. And I would watch matches on the phone with my friend. And they would have to explain everything to me because I was like, I don't get who's the bad guy. I don't get this. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:52 But it is theater. It is like. Oh, it is like oh yeah fun like a soap opera it's like oh yeah whole decades long storylines and then nemesis and alliances and catchphrases can you smell what the rock is cooking did we ever figure out what he was cooking? Wow. He never told us what he was cooking. Wait, can you Google what was The Rock cooking? Wait, what was The Rock cooking? And I think the issue is that we never did smell it. No, because we were at a wrestling match.
Starting point is 00:12:23 So I'm like, did you bring it in Tupperware? And if so, we don't know because there's a lid on it. Or were you cooking backstage? This article, it's pancakes. Pancakes? He was making pancakes the whole time? This is a GQ article, by the way. That's really funny. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:42 What? If I went to someone's house and they're like do you smell what i'm cooking and i'm like yes and it smelled delicious and it was fucking pancakes i would lose my shit i would be like that's it pancakes there's no bacon there's no eggs there's nothing i mean i do love a good pancake how many bad pancakes have you had um i have had bad pancakes before sometimes they're burnt you know too crispy i make the best pancakes because i what deep fry fry them. What? Oh my goodness. Okay. You it's like I'm a professional fat. Okay. I have figured out ways to make things even fatter. So you take the pan, you know how
Starting point is 00:13:37 you put like, like vegetable oil in. See, mine don't look like that. No. So you put vegetable oil in the pan. You put extra vegetable oil in it. Tilt it to the side. Pour the mix in so the pancake is not fully covered in the oil, just the bottom part. And then you flip it. And then it gets so crispy on the outside. And it's so fucking good. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:14:03 I discovered it when I was little. And my mom was like, here, you can try making a pancake by yourself and i said bet i'll make them worse for myself i want to try those pancakes i'll make them for you they're really fucking good they sound delicious okay judith this is mean you're just showing us like delicious looking pastries right now and i can't have them looks so good i'll take it i guess i do love a pancake they are delish they are delish and sometimes that's all i need sometimes i don't need like the other stuff too i went to the delta loungeounge and where was I? I was in Minneapolis. And Delta, I have a bone to pick with you. This lounge was subpar.
Starting point is 00:14:51 There wasn't as many treats to choose from. Here was the choices I had. I had sausage, no vegan option for my brethren who don't eat the swine. There was scrambled eggs and then there was a cheddar omelet and i was like this is double i mean one is cheesy one is not but like why not have some vegetables in the scrambies for my you know vegan brethren and people who are just trying to get some more colors and veggies inside themselves and that was it sashir that was fucking it i mean they had bagels and maybe a muffin or two but i said what it was like half a table worth of stuff and i said
Starting point is 00:15:34 delta we gotta feed the people what are we doing i was so upset i love you grabbing your glasses while you're saying this to me. I was like, what? Delta, come on. What are you doing to me? I was so mad. And then in the bathroom, there was just hand wash, no lotion. I said, in the Midwest, it's cold.
Starting point is 00:16:00 I get ashy. Then I go outside the bathroom. There was a bottle of lotion to be shared between the bathrooms. I said, what is this, Delta? We deserve our own in this one. Ed, what's going on in Minneapolis? I blame Tom Brady. I blame Tom Brady, too.
Starting point is 00:16:22 He got into my man's ear. Let me talk to you, Ed. Tom's out here making too many changes. Too many changes. And then I went to Salt Lake City. I think that's a Delta hub. It's a huge airport. Have you been to the
Starting point is 00:16:40 Salt Lake City airport? Hmm. Not that I can recall. Very large and in charge. Yeah? It's big, it's nice. Is it easy to navigate? Yeah, but it's really big.
Starting point is 00:16:59 But I didn't get a chance to visit the lounge because I only had a 30 minute larver. Larver, oh my goodness i i tried to do something fun and it went a little too fun it got wacky oh lord lord Do you want to do a quiz? I would love to do a little quizzy poo. Let's do it. Ooh. Eat at a buffet and reveal which Disney family you belong to.
Starting point is 00:17:40 I think I'm hungry. I like that. And I also think I'm hungry. Let's see. Buy some pastries and i'll tell you which 2023 heartthrob is your soulmate um make a meal i'll tell you what element you are what are you feeling like this year i like the buffet yeah let's go to i'm trying i've been trying to get you to a buffet for a minute now. And you like won't go to a buffet with me.
Starting point is 00:18:08 It's just like the hygienic aspect of it or lack thereof. Just like the idea of these open like that's a food that people can stand in front of and like breathe over and like put their hands on top of. I'm just like not jazzed about that post covid. So, yeah, what if I light a candle beforehand for our health and, you know, put some vibes out in the air that we're not going to get sick from the buffet? Also, germs do not live on food. That's a thing we learned during covid. I don't know if I learned that germs do not live on food that's a thing we learned during covid i don't know if i learned that germs don't live on food no but like what about salmonella or
Starting point is 00:18:54 oh yeah salmonella that could happen but they have to keep the food at a certain temperature at a buffet so that keeps you from not getting sick. Really? Yeah. Are you lying to me? No, I'm not lying to you. It's just the way you're saying it really feels like you're making this up. Can germs spread to food underneath? feels like you're making here we can germs spread to food underneath usually germs are transmitted from unclean hands to food by an infected food preparer who didn't wash his or her hands
Starting point is 00:19:34 after using the toilet yeah so that's the only thing you gotta worry about oh good and you know all those restaurants they have in the bathroom if if you work here, you gotta wash your hands, so we're safe. Yeah, everyone reads those signs. But I promise you, like, if someone sneezes on food, all that goes away. But I kind of still don't want to eat it after someone sneezed on it. How do you know they didn't sneeze on it in the kitchen before they bring it out to you on a plate at a non-buffet? You know, I don't.
Starting point is 00:20:10 I don't know that. But I guess it just feels better because there's less contact with humans before it gets to my table. Whereas at a buffet, hundreds of people could have encountered that food before I got there. You know? We're not going to like a poppin buffet where there's hundreds of people there. We're going to go at a nice time where the food comes out fresh and we're going to eat before
Starting point is 00:20:31 everybody before we're going to rise. Let me just curate this. OK, I will figure out a restaurant. I'll go beforehand and I will figure out what time they put all the new food out. And that's when we're going to go. Okay. I will let you curate. Oh, my God. Imagine you get sick after that. I'll lose my mind. I'll be like, I just.
Starting point is 00:20:55 I'll never test you again. I can't be responsible for this. I'll never. We're not going. I can't be held responsible. In the off chance that you do get sick or something, I'll never fucking hear the end of it. And then buffets will be ruined for me. And it's just the thing I want to experience with a friend i want to take my friend to a golden corral okay or a chinese buffet okay that's all i fucking want
Starting point is 00:21:15 okay we can go and if i get sick i won't say anything but you'll know just know that's what it was but i won't say anything but just know all right i can take that okay eat at a buffet and reveal which disney family you belong in let's start with drinks what are you choosing lemonade soda wait you go up can i see that soda what kind of sodas are those those are not american they do look uh like from different countries that's fun i want to try the one that looks that's next to the sprite what's that anyway tea no the green one next to the sprite i wonder if that surge rememberge. Remember Surge? I do remember Surge.
Starting point is 00:22:08 It was like an energy drink, kind of. It was soda, but it was like green. It looked like fucking... Like Mountain Dew? Yeah, it looked a little... I think it looked sicker than Mountain Dew, if I remember correctly. Have you been to the Coca-Cola Museum? No.
Starting point is 00:22:21 Where is that? It's in Georgia. I've been maybe three times i really like it you love coca-cola you love capitalism you love big business why have you been to the coca-cola museum three times and have you learned anything new of course not but i think because i've shot in georgia at least three times and i think the first time i went with my reps who came to visit me second time with my cousin to do something and the third time i took my partner and i was like having a genuine good time each time i went i think i like it because like um everyone seems to be really happy there and the person who introduces you to the museum is usually a
Starting point is 00:23:20 teenager and they're like so excited for their job and they're always doing a really good job presenting the facts and they do little quizzes with everybody before we get in there and i'm like oh my god look at them and then we get in there oh my god look at them i'm like look at them at like public speaking at such a young age and then you go in and there's like little movies where you can learn stuff about coca-cola maybe i i think i would like to go my mother loved coca-cola yeah she had a stash of coke in the house that we were not allowed to drink um and i'm like uh an opposite person so i'm surprised i don't like love Coke and drink it,
Starting point is 00:24:05 but there's something like every time I see it, I'm like, oh, my mom wouldn't want me to drink it. That's hers. And she'd been dead for so long. It's still hers though. She claimed.
Starting point is 00:24:15 Yeah. It's still hers. Yeah. I actually don't even drink Coca-Cola, but I, a big fan, but you love it. Wait,
Starting point is 00:24:21 do you love diet Coke? I don't drink any soda. When did that happen for you? As a teen or an adult? As a teen. Or a child? I guess as a child. Because my mom, I remember I played a lot of sports when I was younger.
Starting point is 00:24:35 And my mom was like, if you drink Coke. She was like, there was a kid at a different school who drank Coke or Pepsi or something after every soccer practice and she died. And I was like, OK, well, then I guess I'll never drink it. And I'm sure there are other reasons why this person died. But that's it. And that's why my mom died, too. After soccer practice, she drank Coke and she would pick me up after her soccer practice, guzzling a Coke. Maybe it was like she was drinking that instead of water i don't know but and my mom may not have even been trying to get me to never drink soda but i really took that to heart and was like i
Starting point is 00:25:18 will never drink it and so i don't i'll drink a ginger ale as far as like a fizzy thing not for you not for me and it's really interesting like there's coke and there's pepsi people yes i'm i'm a coke person i don't love pepsi yeah but if forced to drink it i will i don't know if you'll ever be forced yeah i mean if someone put a gun to my head and said drink this pepsi i would i don't know if you'll ever be forced yeah i mean if someone put a gun to my head and said drink this pepsi i would i don't think my mother would though i think she'd be like no go get me a coke and i'll drink that whoa that's how diehard she was damn yeah but you know what i love What? Welsh's grape soda mixed with vanilla ice cream. Whoa. It is a fucking treat, my dude.
Starting point is 00:26:11 That sounds really good. It's so good. Also, strawberry soda is really good. And for whatever reason, my mother told me that they didn't make it in New Jersey. I think they did. So I was only allowed to drink it when we were on vacation in Chicago. That's fun though nice little treat and i'd bring back a little six-pack with me and i'd ration them out
Starting point is 00:26:33 from exotic chicago tea oh yeah smoothie Oh, yeah. Smoothie. Wine. Sparkling water. Ooh. Okay. This is tough. Because I love sparkling water. But I also love wine. And I love a specific smoothie from one place in Studio City.
Starting point is 00:27:04 So. So then. smoothie from one place in studio city so so then it's called it it's called a date a date smoothie it's like peanut butter uh banana and like dates and maybe like almond milk and it's so fucking good it's from this place in studio city called what a peach i hope they never go out of business i choose wine. I will choose tea. I like a tea. You know, I like tea more and more. I had a tea over the weekend because I was so cold. And it warmed me up.
Starting point is 00:27:46 Yeah. It's really good to warm you up from the inside out. Mm-hmm. Pick an appetizer. Guacamole and chips. That doesn't look like no guacamole I've ever seen. Yeah, it looks like cucumbers. Yeah, that's not for me.
Starting point is 00:28:00 Hummus and bread. Charcuterie board. Spring rolls. Calamari. Nachos. I know what you're going to pick. Nachos. Yeah, nachos.
Starting point is 00:28:14 I fucking love nachos. And I was promised nachos the other day and it didn't happen. And I was irate. I couldn't believe it. I was like, what? You can't promise somebody nachos and then not give them nachos. Yeah. I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:28:31 It's okay. What are you picking? Hummus and bread. Oh, a Greek delicacy. Is hummus Greek? No. Uh-oh. I think so.
Starting point is 00:28:44 I feel like yes. Or is it? Is hummus Greek? No. Uh-oh. I think so. I feel like yes. Or is it... It's always on the plate when I order a meal from a Greek place. It is. Yeah, but also it might be a Middle Eastern dish. Hummus was likely created in the Middle East and eventually found its way to Greece. Okay. Cancel me. I was wrong. Wow. You got and eventually found its way to Greece. Okay.
Starting point is 00:29:06 Cancel me. I was wrong. Wow. You got to learn. Educate yourself. I know. Educate myself. Pick another appetizer.
Starting point is 00:29:14 Oh, my God. Appetizer. I said that so strangely. I'm having trouble. That's okay. Bruschetta. Mozzarella sticks. Kebabs.
Starting point is 00:29:28 Pizza pinwheels you okay yeah yeah i'm okay okay we could take a minute if you need no i think i'm okay okay i think i'm hungry i think i'm getting excited you're just salivating. Words aren't coming out. Just so excited to see pictures of food. Brie and Puff Pastry Bites. Mini burgers. Hmm. Hmm.
Starting point is 00:29:59 Okay. Normally, I think I would go for a mini burger. But I gotta say, mini mini burgers sliders are usually so dry that is true and it's so upsetting you know you're like oh i'm getting a tiny hamburger but then it's just like dry and you're like well that wasn't worth it sure it was cute but it wasn't satisfying i'm not here for aesthetic no i'm here to fucking fill up yeah um i'm gonna say a kebab i'm gonna say um i actually might do a mini burger wow you're gonna take a chance i'm gonna take a chance make a change and break away and break away wow hopefully it's it's the moist mini burger we'll see i really hope so
Starting point is 00:30:53 why don't people like the word moist i think it adequately adequately describes things i don't know i guess moist i guess people are oh, don't say it. I'm like, grow up. Is it moist or not? Yeah. Is it slightly wet? Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:13 Do you want me to say that? Slightly wet? Is it slightly wet? Yeah, that's way worse. Let me say moist. Ooh, this bread, slightly wet. Mm-hmm. Also, the mozzarella sticks reminded me of this tweet because, again, stays online.
Starting point is 00:31:34 And there was a tweet that said, hey, do you want 12 cheese sticks? And someone was like, ew, gross, no way. And they're like, what, gross, no way. And they're like, what if we covered it in bread? Oh, absolutely, yes, please. I mean, yeah, if you think about mozzarella sticks, they're wild.
Starting point is 00:31:56 Yeah, it's just like breaded string cheese. And then deep fried. And then they're like, hey, dip it in some tomato. Have a nice time. Yeah, it's pretty funny. I once did a scene.
Starting point is 00:32:06 I think it was me and Jacob Wysocki. And the prop person, Charlie, came out and was like, hey, I need you guys not to eat any more mozzarella sticks. You guys have eaten 36. And I just don't have that many more. And we were like, oh, no. Oopsies. Oopsies. oopsies oopsies maybe that the um boxes each had 18 so maybe you went through two boxes and he's like 36 are gone i'd like to think that he was like 40 is too many for any human. I had to stop the relay. We were like, nah, we're going to do it.
Starting point is 00:32:49 We're going to finish it. Pick a salad. Strawberry balsamic. Garden salad. Shrimp salad. What's a shrimp salad? I guess it's a salad with shrimp in it, on it. yeah but like is there cheese what kind of salad is it i've never heard of a shrimp salad i think it's i don't know wait go up is this i know it's strawberry balsamic it's like there's strawberries in
Starting point is 00:33:21 there and cheese and stuff and balsamic. A garden salad is like a normal salad. What the fuck is a shrimp salad? Is it like potato salad? Is there mayonnaise in it? From this picture, it looks like a Caesar salad with shrimp on top of it. No, it doesn't. There's tomatoes in it. There's no tomatoes in a Caesar salad, so sure.
Starting point is 00:33:40 Come on. Well, this is a shrimp salad, and that's why it's different. Okay, so maybe a shrimp salad is a Caesar salad with just tomatoes and shrimp. Maybe. I mean, have you ever heard of a shrimp salad? No. From what I can find, it says a shrimp salad is usually made of perfectly cooked or chilled shrimp, crunchy celery and scallions,
Starting point is 00:34:08 and a flavor-packed creamy dressing. And then you scoop it with like, you can put it like in a croissant, or you can like scoop it with a chip or something like that, but it's almost like the chicken salad version of shrimp, maybe. Oh, okay. Okay. Okay. All right. Does that answer your question i guess but this doesn't look like i'm scooping it with a cracker no this does look like a salad with shrimp on top yeah
Starting point is 00:34:36 okay caesar salad a caprese salad cob salad i love a Cobb salad, but I do not like the hard-boiled egg in it. And I do not like blue cheese. So you don't like a Cobb salad. You're right. I think I don't. I love a caprese salad because it's not a salad. No, it's not. It's cheese and tomatoes.
Starting point is 00:35:07 A little basil. It's so good. Oh, what are you going to pick? I think I'm going to pick the strawberry balsamic. Whoa, with the feta cheese? Yeah, I like feta. I don't think I like feta. It's better. No. Boo! Pick a main dish. Spaghetti and a meatball. Veggie burger. Oh, I know what you're picking. Salmon dish.
Starting point is 00:35:36 Cold noodle bowl with tofu. Mushroom pizza. Teriyaki chicken bento box. What are you going to pick, Sashir? This is really tough for me, but I think I'm going to go with the salmon dish. Judith's already hovering over it. Yes, I'm going to pick the salmon dish. You love salmon!
Starting point is 00:35:57 I do. I love salmon. I like teriyaki chicken, and that's what I'm going to pick. Nice. I love teriyaki chicken. that's what I'm going to pick. Nice. I love teriyaki chicken. Did you know that about me? I don't think I did actually. It's good.
Starting point is 00:36:13 Pick another main dish. Steak and fries. Tomato soup as a main. Chicken alfredo. Ramen. Enchiladasadas carnitas tacos oh this is tough i love a taco i'm new to ramen love ramen yeah chicken alfredo yum yum yum don't mind if i do steak and fries well that's a classic uh-huh so then gee whiz golly gee gosh darn i think i'm gonna pick the steak and fries of course you are i couldn't i can't believe that wasn't a quick decision well i really love ramen.
Starting point is 00:37:05 Wow. I'm so glad. I love it. It's so good. Emily Heller introduced me to ramen because I was like, I don't like soup. She's like, you might like ramen. And then I was like, wow, this is soup, but there's chunkums. Lots of chunkums.
Starting point is 00:37:19 Lots of chunkums. And I love me a chunk. I will do. I think i'll do ramen can i have some yeah we can share okay thank you pick another main dish yes we're getting filled well so remember, we're at a buffet. Buffets have multiple mains. That's so true. That's the glory of a buffet. You don't have to choose one main. You can keep going back and getting exactly what you want.
Starting point is 00:37:56 Okay. That's true. Pepperoni pizza. Pho. I've never had pho, but that looks fun does butter chicken i just had that it's so good it's so good dumplings dumplings are also so good burrito roast chicken with roasted veggies i feel like it should be roasted chicken what's a roast chicken that's why i had trouble reading that because i was like roast chicken interesting god defun buzzfeed okay i think i'm gonna go with that butter chicken, baby. Nice. I'm going to do the pepperoni pizza.
Starting point is 00:38:49 I knew you were. You love pizza. I love pizza. There was a... Have you ever been to a Cece's Pizza? That's a buffet. That is a buffet. That's a pizza buffet with all kinds of pizza.
Starting point is 00:39:04 I think I went one time um and i don't know why my mother wouldn't bring me back there and if i remember correctly oh no pizza had just had a salad bar and they had this blueberry pizza dessert that was delicious now this one's a different cc's we're looking looking for Cece with an I. Two I's. There. C-I, C-I. C-I, C-I. Anything is pizza-able.
Starting point is 00:39:35 Oh, I love this place. Well, should we go to a Cece's Pizza? Yeah. Are they even in L.A.? I thought it was this Midwest thing. Find your Cece's. Let's find your cc's let find our cc where's our cc's oh they have a lot oh they don't have none in california damn that's crazy right what state's closest to us arizona yeah well no it looks like no actually where's new where's new vegas no where's las vegas oh my god nevada uh not nevada the closest might be new mexico or colorado yeah colorado
Starting point is 00:40:17 oh yeah that's just a skip away oh my god for a pizza buffet for a pizza buffet well that's wild i guess we're not gonna go to a cc not anytime sorry about that uh pizza hut used to have this like pizza dessert at the at the salad bar it was like a blueberry pizza dessert am i making this up do you mind i ain't gonna know did Did Pizza Hut used to have a pizza dessert? There were several different topping options that you could find, including apple cherry. The dessert pizza was often featured with a
Starting point is 00:40:53 streusel top, making them even more delectable. Sadly, you won't find dessert pizzas on the Pizza Hut menu anymore. Oh, no. Wow. I mean, bring it back. Pizza Hut, bring that back. Applebee apple bees bring back the apple churmy cheesecake please the people want it this person wants it pick a side dish coleslaw ugh beans mac and cheese that looks dry as fuck miso soup cabbage roll what the fuck is a cabbage roll kimchi
Starting point is 00:41:27 oh yes i thought you were answering your own question what is a cabbage roll kimchi no kimchi is another option i think kimchi is a different option um That cabbage roll looks sick. Cabbage roll. Ground pork or beef is mixed with sauteed caramelized onion and rice stuffed in a cabbage leaf, pickled sauerkraut leaf or a grape leaf. Okay. That's not
Starting point is 00:42:00 for me. Yeah, and that's okay. Yeah, that's for other people. I'm gonna pick that dry ass mac and cheese. I will have... Do you like beans? Are you a bean girl? I'll eat a bean, yeah.
Starting point is 00:42:19 So you fuck with legumes? Yeah, I like legumes. Maybe I'll have beans well if i ever saw you slopping up beans you wouldn't hear the end of it i don't think i've ever seen you slop up beans what about a barbecue i mean i think i've eaten barbecue with you and i don't think i've ever seen you slop up beans like i think maybe the barbecues were going, people aren't really making beans like that, but I feel like I definitely eat beans like when my family makes beans for different holidays or whatever.
Starting point is 00:42:52 Your family be making beans for the holidays? We're a legume family. I've never had holiday beans. Never? Baked beans. I've never had holiday beans. With like pork in it or something? No, I've never had holiday beans.
Starting point is 00:43:12 What about black eyed peas? Which are peas, I guess, technically. Yeah, you have them on New Year's. Yeah, exactly. My mother would make them every New Year's. Maybe I'll make them. No, I won't be home. What are you?
Starting point is 00:43:22 Are you going to pick beans? I think I'll pick beans. You bean I won't be home. What are you, are you going to pick beans? I think I'll pick beans. You bean freak. Oh my God. I'm not going to take this. Pick another side dish. Fries. Rice.
Starting point is 00:43:39 Egg rolls. Buffalo cauliflower. Edamame. Potato salad. I haven't thought about buffalo cauliflower in a while. It really took the fast casual dining scene by storm. Yeah, it sure did. It was on like every menu for a while.
Starting point is 00:44:02 Are you reporting this to somewhere? Is this like a a new segment really took the fast cash from the scene by storm this is the call from abc 11 it did it was like on every menu yeah You can't escape buffalo cauliflower. Big cauliflower was taken over. I think I'm going to do fries. I will. I think I'll also do fries.
Starting point is 00:44:37 I do love a fry. Finally, pick a dessert. Cheesecake. Baklava. Cupcake. Those are cute little cupcakes a macaron donut ice cream sundae oh that looks nasty that ice cream sundae that's what i want okay oof i think i'm gonna do a cute little cupcake oh i like them you pop in, and then you're done. What is this? Oh, we're in a family.
Starting point is 00:45:10 Oh, I totally forgot. Yeah, can you actually eat a buffet, and we'll reveal which Disney family you belong in. Pretty funny. This is this? I'm in the Incredibles family.
Starting point is 00:45:25 This is an epic family for an epic person. Are you a brave, confident, fearless risks, risks taker? Not really. Then this family is for you. Boring family functions are not your thing.
Starting point is 00:45:37 Dinner. No, thank you. Bungie jumping. Bring it on. I can't believe for read more was just bring it on that's very funny i mean weren't you mrs incredible at disney i was yeah so i guess they already knew they could tell they could read my energy okay so i'm the family from the lady and the tramp i didn't even know there was a family
Starting point is 00:46:00 one of them just the two dogs this is the perfect family for all those who appreciate the finer things in life yes i do and love all things traditional and sophisticated i don't know pasta dinner nightly yes please cute holiday decor always of course okay you love pasta i do love pasta i also really do like that they made that dog look like a boy and they made that dog look like a girl. I know her ears are like long, wavy. Uh-huh. Like their hair.
Starting point is 00:46:34 I just, I mean like creating these characters, like what were the notes? Make her ears look more like hair. Probably. We got to make this dog look fuckable. Yeah, I don't want to fuck this dog yet so you gotta go back to the drawing board and then they come back and there's tits on her and they're like too much this is a kid's movie it does she kind of if you look yeah her chest is very pronounced yeah that's wild it is weird and then the dog the boy dog kind of has a muscle arm
Starting point is 00:47:02 yeah he has like biceps. Disney's sick. I mean, I do feel like Disney is solely responsible for like kids growing up wanting to like sexually objectify animals. Not in real life, but you know cartoons i mean i think most of us think the beast is hotter as a beast and not as a human oh absolutely and that's disney's fault because they could have made him cuter as a human and they chose not to yeah it is very strange like why did you choose to draw them that way? There must have been so many meetings. Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 00:47:48 Mm-hmm. Should we answer a question? Jordan has a question. Judith, can I share something really fast? What? I found the dumbest article. It's so stupid. So I found Disney dumbest article. It's so stupid. So I found Disney's hottest animated animal characters ranked.
Starting point is 00:48:13 Oh my God. The scientific explanation for the thinking they're sexy. That scene where Nala and Symbol are tumbling, Nala is giving bedroom eyes. She really is. She's like, come here. Look at her. She's like, come on.
Starting point is 00:48:30 Okay. Bernard from The Rescuers. Let's do the top ten. Yeah. Like, what? We're really scraping the bottom of the barrel here. Okay. Number ten.
Starting point is 00:48:42 Lady. Lady in the Tramp tramp she's absolutely stunning has long curly brown ears that swish when she walks and a shiny blue gold collar despite her refined upbringing she has a warm personality that shines through her big expressive eyes oh my god hey hot tiger oh yeah zootopia oh he is yeah he is hot he leaves a lasting impression Hot Tiger is
Starting point is 00:49:08 thick and muscular we only see him traveling on Zootopia's public transportation for a few seconds but that's enough to leave us fantasizing
Starting point is 00:49:16 oh my god Nick Wilde from Zootopia the fox I don't know about that. He has a sly smile and a mischievous wit. I can see that. All right.
Starting point is 00:49:33 Nala, the Lion King, is number seven. Yeah, definitely. With her regal presence and sleek looks, Nala is a queen long before she takes a seat next to Simba on the throne. While she's a beautiful lion to Simba on the throne. While she's a beautiful lion with golden fur and hypnotic green eyes, Nala is so attractive. Is her feminine strength and confidence.
Starting point is 00:49:55 Ooh, yes. Simba's number six. He's my number one, honestly. I can't believe he's number six. Yeah. Part brooding lion Hamlet, part goofball embracing the hakuna matata lifestyle simba is one of the dreamiest beasts on the african savannah wow basil the great mouse detective is number five ride or die for basil sure he's only a few inches tall but he's the sexiest british accent get out of here. What?
Starting point is 00:50:27 Oh, this is for absolutely my crush. Roxanne from A Goofy Movie. Is that Disney, though? Yeah. Oh. She's hot. She's hot. She's thick.
Starting point is 00:50:40 Roxanne is a true girl next door, even though she's popular and impossibly gorgeous. Her kind-hearted demeanor and sporty style make her seem approachable. That's all we want is someone who's hot but approachable i also like that she has cankles like whoever drew her was like okay cankles are hot and i'll prove it to you and i'm so they're hot on her yeah beret girl an extremely goofy movie i don't think i've seen an extremely goofy movie that one's pretty good too it's really funny it's when Max goes to college. So this is like Max, this college girlfriend. Wow, she is hot.
Starting point is 00:51:10 I don't wanna just be with beret girl, I wanted to be her. Beret girl oozes a hip sophistication with her all black ensemble. Maybe I'll watch that tonight. Maybe I will too. Oh, Kovu's hot too. Kovu from Lion King too, Kobu's hot too. Oh yeah. Lion King too. Simba's pride.
Starting point is 00:51:27 Yeah. Kobu is the ultimate bad boy. The tortured emo son of scars. Disciple Zira just wants to be understood. Yeah. Okay. Robin Hood from Robin Hood. People really,
Starting point is 00:51:44 really go hard for Robin Hood and I'm just so so on him I think people have like something for like a sneaky fox I don't know maybe he's a bad boy with good intentions steals from the rich and gives to the poor I don't know where's Aladdin where was where's he on that I love. Well, no, this was just the animal characters. Oh, I forgot. I absolutely forgot. Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes. We can find another article that ranks like all the princesses and princes.
Starting point is 00:52:14 Well, I'm glad Flounder wasn't on there because Flounder's a child. I'm also glad Flounder wasn't on that. Should we answer a question? Yeah. We probably only have time for one. Hi, Nicole and Sashira. I have a friendship question. My pronouns are she, her, as are my friends. I have this friend, Alice. We used to be super close. We spent some holidays with each other's family when we couldn't afford to fly home, and I still chat with her mom sometimes. A few years ago, Alice was packing for a cross-country move, and we were talking on the
Starting point is 00:53:03 phone, and I said something that upset her. I honestly don't remember exactly what it was. I thought it was a joke, but apparently I hit a nerve. Every time I tried to apologize, call, text, a handwritten, a literal handwritten letter, I got no response. So I figured friendship over, which was rough, but you can't force someone to be friends with you. I could accept that and move on. Except it wasn't over. After about six months of no contact, Alice started sending me memes on Instagram. Just one to two a week. This sounds innocuous, but we used to be really good friends. And I know for a fact that she keeps a mental list of people to keep in touch with to like maintain her circle or something. I never really understood it, but it always felt like a sales slash political
Starting point is 00:53:45 mindset to me. And I'm apparently on that list. The kicker is that I don't really love animals, which she knows. And nine out of 10 of these reels she'll send are cute animals of some sort. Theoretically, they should be universally beloved, which is why I know she sends the same one to multiple people. But they're not beloved by me. It's been about three years of this. And it hurts my feelings every time I get a bunny video because it's just a reminder that we're not really friends anymore. I don't know what to do because it's literally just a reel in my inbox a few times a week, but I actively hate it.
Starting point is 00:54:20 Every notification makes me feel bad. I want to tell her just be my friend or don't, but don't keep me in this weird acquaintance limbo. But we really don't talk anymore. So that feels insane to do. I also send her reels back. Am I just enabling this by responding? Please help me. Thanks.
Starting point is 00:54:39 So they've been in friendship limbo for three years? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Huh. Huh. I know on Instagram you can, like, hide new messages, I think. Or, like, block.
Starting point is 00:54:58 Or, like, they send the message, but you just don't see it. So you could do that if you really don't want to have the conversation. but you just don't see it. So you could do that if you really don't wanna have the conversation. Because if you've made your peace not being friends with this person, I guess I'm like, why open a can of worms and be like, what's going on?
Starting point is 00:55:17 Yeah, that's true. Cause it's like, what would be the goal by having a talk with this person to be like why are you sending me memes but not talking to me about what happened yeah i think you can mute a conversation yeah i would just i would do that i would just mute it because it also doesn't sound like this person even needs you to respond. If they're just sending blanket general bunny videos to everybody they have ever met, it doesn't sound like they're waiting for your response.
Starting point is 00:55:55 They're not waiting for a ha-ha or a conversation. So maybe, yeah, if you mute them, maybe they won't notice. Mm-hmm. And then maybe if they do notice and they're like oh they're not sending me memes back maybe they'll be the one to be like why aren't you sending memes back and you could be like well we got into that fight we're not really talking anymore yeah yeah this one's a little tough for me because i mean honestly me personally i would just i would just ignore it i would just be like i don't want to see this anymore so i would just not i think that's what i would do too
Starting point is 00:56:32 unless you genuinely miss this person but i think i'd also be like very confused that she went no contact and then six months, just started sending very generic memes to me. Yeah, it's a little weird. Yeah, because if I did do something that bothered my friend, I would just want them to tell me, especially after I apologize profusely, even with a handwritten letter. Are you kidding me? I don't even write things anymore with my hand. It hurts. I've never seen, you know, in the last three years, I've never seen such a write a thing down. I can't. I can't even write things anymore with my hand. It hurts. I've never seen, you know, in the last three years,
Starting point is 00:57:06 I've never seen Susha write a thing down. I can't. I can't hold a pen anymore. She can't hold anything. I'm not dexterous like that anymore. Is that the word? Yeah, she has no more dexterity. I have no more dexterity.
Starting point is 00:57:17 I just fall right out of my fingers. She eats out of a bucket because she can't even hold a fork. I just put the food right on a plate and I and i eat it like a trough and then tilt it and i hit the bottom of it to help it go in her mouth so if i put a pin in my hand and i mold my fingers around it in such a painful manner to scribble out a letter for you and you don't respond to me it's done yeah i think that a wrap. I think we just mute this conversation and then in a month, see if they've written you something.
Starting point is 00:57:49 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, get rid of, yeah, you don't got it. You don't, you don't got it. Yep, you don't got it. You don't got it. You don't got to respond is what i was trying to say but my brain just stopped yeah all right we did it we did it solved if you have any questions or queries you can email
Starting point is 00:58:16 nicole and sashira at gmail.com or call or text or leave a voice memo at 424-645-7003. If you want to rep us with merch, we got it at paddlerpodswag.com slash best friends. If you want to read instead of listen to our episodes, we got it. Check them out on our show page at earwolf.com.
Starting point is 00:58:40 If you think we're all that and a bag of chips, don't forget to rate, review review and subscribe. It's the easiest way to support these chips. All right, my sister. Yes, girl. Bye. Bye. Bye.

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