Best Friends with Nicole Byer and Sasheer Zamata - Nicole Says ‘The X Games Ain’t Your Momma’s Olympics!’

Episode Date: July 26, 2023

Hey there friends. This week it’s all about sports?! Sasheer is trying to boogie board. Nicole thinks there needs to be more events at the X Games. Sasheer would do rallying at the X Games while  N...icole would do freestyle BMX biking. Both Sasheer and Nicole learned about professional tag and red rover.  Nicole shares her love over a specific cereal brand while Sasheer shares info about what it takes to adopt a bird since holding a bird is on Nicole’s bucket list. Plus, we answer a question about a friend trying to navigate a friend’s partner’s perception of their friendship.  Source: World Chase Tag USA 2021: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mrNIdKtj8pU Here is the quiz we took:https://www.buzzfeed.com/simoncoward/what-kind-of-clown-are-you  Email or call Nicole & Sasheer with your friendship questions and  “Is this weird” suggestion at:424-645-7003nicoleandsasheer@gmail.com Get access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using this show link https://siriusxm.com/friends and code FRIENDS.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hi friends, this is Sashir. Do you ever say to yourself, I love hearing Nicole and Sashir talk to each other each week, but I'm dying for more content. Well, you're in luck. I'm coming out with a new standup special where I'll be talking uninterrupted for an hour. This is the first special I produced
Starting point is 00:00:21 and I'm so excited for you to see it. If you want to contribute, it'll be available on the 800 pound gorilla gorilla website and a pay-what-you-can model starting August 15th, and then it'll be free on YouTube starting August 29th. Thanks again for supporting me, Nicole, and our show, but mostly me. Thank you so much. Hi, Sashir. Hi, Nicole. What's going on?
Starting point is 00:00:59 What's going on with you? What is this energy? What is this? Very presentational right now. Oh, I don't know. I just, what have I been doing? I just had therapy. Nice.
Starting point is 00:01:17 I canceled a personal training session today because I am sore. Yeah, from a different training session or something else? Well, I did pull on uh sunday and i got upside down and i did a little uh leg holdy thingy um and then i yeah i just woke up today and i was like i'm tired i simply couldn't lift a weight i understand so that's the energy. I'm just a little tired. Yeah. I went to the, I'm in Mexico and I went to the beach two days in a row. And my legs hurt. And boy, do my legs hurt.
Starting point is 00:02:00 My leg, I don't even know what muscle it is. It's like the inner thigh, but like lower than the inner thigh and higher than the knee. But some muscle that I've never used before hurts really bad. And I can't tell if it's just from walking into the waves or like because I'm also trying to boogie board because that's and it seems like an accessible water sport. But then I get like pounded by the waves and I've been trying to swim out farther. But then my little legs are kicking really hard and I'm not going anywhere. Is that like a toe or a current or something? Probably. I have no idea.
Starting point is 00:02:42 I'm new to water. Huh? I'm new to water. Huh? I'm new to water. If you swim, I find swimming backwards, I get more because you can just like grab the water and push it forward and kick your little legs. That's how I get back to shore if I get too far out. And I'm like, oh, yeah, I'm not making any progress. Am I going to be lost at sea? I just turn around and then I'm right there at the shore and I go, oh, I wasn't making any progress. Am I going to be lost at sea? I just turn around.
Starting point is 00:03:05 And then I'm right there at the shore and I go, oh, I wasn't lost at all. Yeah, I'll try to turn around. It was hard. My friends were like, the waves are better over here. And I was like, I got it. And then I was like, the water doesn't want me to go farther. It wants me to stay right in this one spot. So I'll now go to the shore and walk it
Starting point is 00:03:26 and then get in the water. I mean, that's a thing to do, to just swim back, walk over, and then swim out again. Mm-hmm. But I don't know anything about boogie boarding. It's, um, there's a whole, it's a sport. I thought, I saw, you know, I've seen kids do it.
Starting point is 00:03:44 I saw an adult do it and they stood on their boogie board there's some that you can stand on like a surfboard and like do like flips
Starting point is 00:03:52 and spins and stuff like that and so I saw a YouTube video of like someone like spinning in a wave and I was like
Starting point is 00:04:01 I'm gonna try that and I think I turned like 180 degrees but then like the wave came right into my face like all up in my nose smacked me down and it was like what are you doing why are you trying to go so so all out this is not x games is the water wait is boogie boarding is boogie boarding I'm not saying it right. Is boogie boarding in the X Games? I have no idea.
Starting point is 00:04:27 Probably not. But maybe. Or is it Olympics? I have a feeling it isn't in the Olympics. I think it has a better chance of being in the X Games. And also, I think when you take it seriously, it's called body boarding. Oh. They said, better get that boogie out of here.
Starting point is 00:04:47 We body boarding. Yeah, the kids. Why am I saying this weird body boarding, boarding, boarding, boarding, body boarding. There we go. Body boarding. Adding letters where they don't belong. That's what I love to do. Wait, are the X Games just like the cool Olympics?
Starting point is 00:05:14 I think so. I feel like that's how they were first marketed. Like all the extreme sports that like your parents don't want you to do. We got them all here. Like skateboarding, right? Like skateboarding's in the X. Oh, motocross, snowboarding, surfing, skateboarding, freestyle BMX.
Starting point is 00:05:35 That's funny to me. Freestyle skiing, BMX. Rallying? What's rallying? Border cross. What? Border cross. I think it's with the big the big cars and you
Starting point is 00:05:46 like drive through the rough dirt that's rallying cross maybe looks like skiing or snowboarding snowboard snowboard cross oh interesting i mean it doesn't seem like there's enough events that's a good number the olympics has so many events it's like the hundred yard freestyle the fucking breaststroke the fucking uh other swimmings like they have a bunch of different swimmings they do have a bunch of different swimmings and run-ins and jump-ins. I don't think the X Games is trying to be the Olympics, though. I think it's just its own thing.
Starting point is 00:06:33 Are you sure it's not your mama's Olympics? I don't think I've ever heard them say, this ain't your mama's Olympics. Are you sure that's not what they're going for? This ain't your mama's Olympics. We're the X Games. Do-do-do. We're cool. I mean, they should.
Starting point is 00:06:55 They should be advertising that way, but I don't know if they are. Huh. Missed opportunity. Okay, so if you were in the X Games, what would your event be? Out of those ones that we listed? Oh, God. Maybe the rallying because I could be in a car and I feel like I'm more protected. My body is more protected than it is on a bike or snowboarding or something. Wow. That's not the X Games spirit. You're right. I should be thinking extreme. I should want to hurt my body.
Starting point is 00:07:27 Yeah. Yes. Hurt yourself. These games kill. Yeah. I would do freestyle BMX biking because I don't want to follow any rules. I'm a freestyle. I'm gonna do whatever the fuck I want. Hop up up here, slam down here. Twist my little wheels and have a nice time. I would freestyle and just like go home. Ride my bike home. My freestyle is, I got to get out of here. Like, damn, she doesn't care about the rules. She went home.
Starting point is 00:08:00 That is badass. Not your mama's X Games. She went home. In the Olympics, you have to compete but not here you can just leave there should be something that is like
Starting point is 00:08:12 a competition that's all the rejected Olympic sports like not even the X Games but like
Starting point is 00:08:20 um well it's actually hard because there's a lot of Olympic sports that I would not have guessed are Olympic sports, but actually are like curling or ping pong. Ping pong's in the Olympics? Isn't table tennis in the Olympics?
Starting point is 00:08:36 I feel like yes. I don't know what season. Wow. Yeah. Wow. Wow. I wonder if pickleball's in the Olympics, the fastest growing sport in America. At this rate, it will be.
Starting point is 00:08:50 Wait, Jordan says, do you know there's a professional tag? It's not X Games, but there are pro teams. Wait, what? Yeah, like the game tag. Oh, the game tag. Yeah, there's a pro...
Starting point is 00:09:02 Oh, yes. It's so cool looking. And the course is like so crazy. It's almost like parkour meets tag. And, there's a, oh, yes. It's so cool looking and the, the course is like so crazy. It's almost like parkour meets tag. And so people are like jumping over railings,
Starting point is 00:09:11 but you have to be in this like 20 by 20 foot space and you like tag back and forth and whoever doesn't get tagged wins. So, and people get paid for this. Wow.
Starting point is 00:09:22 Yeah, I think I was in a bar that was playing it and I saw that game, match game. I don for this. Yeah, I think I was in a bar that was playing it and I saw that match game. I don't know. And it's really nice because they hug at the end.
Starting point is 00:09:32 Like it looks like they're like ferociously chasing each other like bounding over things like jumping like animals and then they tag each other and then they give each other a big hug
Starting point is 00:09:41 and then they part. And I'm like, well, that's nice. That is nice to be hunted and then hugged. Hunted and then hugged. Oh, my God. They really are just going for it. We got to find a video.
Starting point is 00:09:54 You need to see how, like, these are athletes. This is like, they're using their whole body. So, sure, you're correct. At the end, they are very sweet and kind to each other. It's really nice. It's really nice to see. How wild. It's the tag community for you.
Starting point is 00:10:13 I've played tag maybe twice. I'm just not good at it. It's tough to get away from people when you don't want to run. Yes, this is true. I wonder if Red Rover is some sort of Olympic sport. Red Rover, Red Rover, send a friend right over. Send a friend right over.
Starting point is 00:10:31 Okay, Judith pulled up a video. But when that person's like so close to you, can't you turn around and tag them? I think there's only one tagger at a time. I think it was like
Starting point is 00:10:40 one person's it. Oh, okay. And then they have like, wow. Oh my God. Akron, Ohio. Wow. Knowing me, I would run into one of the bars. Yeah, they're running at full speed.
Starting point is 00:11:02 And there's like, yeah, there's like metal bars all over the place. I'm sure they're pad at full speed and there's like yeah there's like metal bars all over the place i'm sure they're padded or something but that's uh that is extreme it seems very extreme i also like in the promo they're like we're in akron ohio home to lebron james and it's like oh but i came for the tag i don't care for the famous why who are from here. Why are you listing these basketball players? We're watching tag. We're watching tag, not the NBA, not the National Biscuit Bowl Association. That's different. It's very, very different. For the tag arts administration.
Starting point is 00:11:40 But, Nicole, I do have something to share with you about Red Rover. Apparently, there's a rugby meets Red Rover in a country, India. Oh. Oh. And there's a lot of spectators. Yeah, there's a full stadium. Wow. Red Rover's so hard. I remember being like, I'll be good at this.
Starting point is 00:12:04 And then it was like, oh, wait, these children's hands are strong. Children have a good grip. They really do. You know when a baby, like, fucking wraps its finger or, like, wraps its hand around your finger and you're like, well, that's enough of that. And then they just don't let go. Yeah. They're holding on for a dear life. Or a baby tries to take your food.
Starting point is 00:12:24 You have to say goodbye to that food. Yeah, because they squished it to high hell. They really do. Oh boy, babies, am I right? Mm-hmm. I wonder what a duck, like an extreme duck-duck-goose game would look like. There'd be like a fire in the middle
Starting point is 00:12:39 and spikes on the outside of the circle. Everyone has a helmet on and they have a spike on their helmet. And then those spikes, they retract and come up and down. I mean, I'm into it. I would play Extreme Duck Duck Goose. Did we talk about the show
Starting point is 00:12:58 The Floor is Lava? Did you watch that show? Do you remember this show? I did not watch it, but I do remember it. It was a Netflix show? It was a Netflix show? I did not watch it, but I do remember it. It was a Netflix show? It was a Netflix show. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:08 Floor is lava. And people just had to jump around and not fall on the floor? Yes. But the floor actually was like water or something or like something that they could fall into. And then they have to like jump on like desks and like cabinets and things like that. Yes. Oh, yeah. And just like Tetris.
Starting point is 00:13:32 No, that's not a Tetris cube. What's that called? A Rubik's cube. A Rubik's cube. Oh, yeah. This is fun. It was fun. And every room like has a theme.
Starting point is 00:13:41 It's kind of it reminded me of like, what was it? The Hidden Temples show. Yeah, the one with the faces reminds me of the Hidden Temples show. Legend of the Hidden Temples. Yeah. What's it called? That's like my childhood. Legends of the Hidden Temple.
Starting point is 00:13:59 Oh, I thought you said Ligions. And I was like, I don't know what a Ligion is. I was like, that's some sort of animal. I also thought you said Agenda. And I was like, I don know what a Ligion is I was like That's some sort of animal I also thought you said Agenda And I was like I don't think that's right But I'm gonna go with it
Starting point is 00:14:09 I don't wanna Cause I don't know The real Agenda of the Hidden Temple This Hidden Temple Has an agenda And you have to Hop to and fro
Starting point is 00:14:17 To figure out What it's agenda is That's funny Y'all should we play a game let's play a game slash quiz oh yeah. I thought you had a game that you wanted to play. And I was like, okay, teach me the rules and I'll play. I wish. I wish I did. You don't know any games?
Starting point is 00:14:52 I feel like I've tried to explain games on the show and then I do it wrong and I get embarrassed and it's never, isn't paying out good for me. I get it. I was at a brunch yesterday and there was a couple playing Uno, and I was like, oh my God, should I join them? But then I was like, oh, maybe they're not a couple,
Starting point is 00:15:12 and he's trying to get at her, and I would just be cock-blocking. But I can't stop thinking about it. I really want to go play Uno with those people. I haven't played Uno in so long. I need to play Uno. I also haven't played Uno in so long. Uno's fun. Uno's fun fun do you have a deck of course i have a deck oh okay of course i'm just i just haven't
Starting point is 00:15:34 had the opportunity to pull it out and say we're playing uno oh okay these quizzes. What kind of clown are you? Yes. Yeah. And I better get Cirque du Soleil clown. Ooh. I did tell you that if you were to be in Cirque du Soleil, that you would most likely be a clown. Yeah, but if BuzzFeed tells me that, it's not insulting. Oh. I wasn't trying to insult you sure jam okay what kind of clown are you pick your
Starting point is 00:16:13 dream house okay this is like a little red house in the middle of nowhere i think it's probably like a studio house with maybe just like a bathroom and a kitchen and a room. This is a, what do you call this house? Country? Mm-hmm. Like a country style house? It's got a big wraparound porch. It's blue, shingles, white, like fence posts and whatnot.
Starting point is 00:16:48 Okay, this one's spooky. This one's a black and white house in the middle of like an eerie foggy uh forest and i i also think it's a studio house do we call one room houses studio houses or just studio apartments we call one room houses studio houses or just studio apartments um that's a really good question i maybe a one hmm i was gonna say maybe a one bedroom house is a bungalow but also i don't really know what qualifies as a bungalow so i don't know i don't know either and this we have a studio house boat or maybe there's more rooms I don't know but it's a boat I feel like there's more rooms
Starting point is 00:17:32 it's a good sized boat it's a yacht I think so if you want to live on a yacht there's an option oh my god I don't love any of these options to be honest me either I guess I'm going to live on the yacht mhm Oh, my God. I don't love any of these options, to be honest. Me either. I'm going to I guess I'm going to live on the yacht. Mm hmm.
Starting point is 00:17:56 I will live in the country house with the porch. I think that's a good option. The other two was like spooky and then the other one was like in the middle of nowhere and small. Really small. Too small. Not small. Too small. Not good. Mm-mm. What will you eat for breakfast?
Starting point is 00:18:09 Bananas. My feelings. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. That's not nourishing. Crepes. Cereal. I'm certainly not having a banana or multiple bananas.
Starting point is 00:18:28 I'm not eating my feelings because I need to get them out, not in. I'm not having cereal like a basic fucking loser. No, I'm kidding. I'm going to do crepes. That's good. I like cereal. I've been eating a lot of cereal lately, but not even at breakfast time. Just like as a snack.
Starting point is 00:18:47 Cereal as a snack cereal as a snack yeah cereal milk it's a nice little like corner filler when i like a little corner it's empty what kind of cereal i prefer honey nut cheerios okay honey nut cheerios i think are okay i think frosted flakes they lose their frosticity too quickly in the milk. Sure. Uh-huh. I like bad cereal. I love Cracklin' Oats. I don't even think I know what that is. Nobody does. It's like grandma cereal. Judith, do you mind looking up Cracklin' Oats? Maybe it's Cracklin' Oat Bran. It's in a blue box and I get so excited when I see it.
Starting point is 00:19:28 Cracklin? Yes, Cracklin Oat Bran. They're Oats. Oh my gosh. This looks like what you eat when you like need to poop. Yes. And I love them. I'm like obsessed with them.
Starting point is 00:19:42 I'm so delighted to just see them on a screen. Like, what do you like about it? The taste? The taste, the texture, the crunch. That you can put your little tongue through the hole if you're having fun. I just love Cracklin' O'Brand. Yeah, I have never seen it and it looks like i'd break my tooth on it but well you put the milk on and they soak up the milk a little and then they're a little softer but they are still pretty crunchy but they're so good. I really implore everybody listening to buy them.
Starting point is 00:20:30 I just, Judith, I think you should eat them. Jordan, I think you should get them too. They're so good. They have cinnamon? Ooh. Have you just been eating the plain one? I've been eating the plain ones, but that's enough for me. That's enough flobber.
Starting point is 00:20:53 It is a flavor explosion in your mouth. Honestly, they are such a treat, and I can't believe more people don't eat them. Huh. I mean, yeah, they do look like a healthy option. I don't think they're healthy. That's the thing. I think it's really misleading. Oh, no. I don't think they're healthy that's the thing i think it's really misleading oh no i don't think they're healthy whatsoever i think they're full of sugar and carbs oh they look like i don't know bran a half a cup is 300 calories and then you gotta
Starting point is 00:21:19 add your milk and then half a cup that's not a full cereal no cup is nothing you need at least a cup to be fucking around with something i'm trying to fuck around with a cup a cup is 600 calories i don't think that's i don't think i don't know if that's healthy for me i don't know what meals are i don't know but there's no sodium hey there we go and there's protein wow and there is a little fiber i don't really i don't know what i'm talking i don't know anything about i just know about calories i guess but i don't even know about that i don't know someone's gonna write in and be like they are actually healthy and i'll be like great okay where will you go on vacation i going to go to the Kellogg factory and watch them make crackling Oprah. Okay, but that's not an option here.
Starting point is 00:22:09 Bermuda. France. California. New Jersey. Who's going to New Jersey for vacation? They have like a boardwalk beach situation. The shore is great, but I can't imagine getting on a plane to go there and being like, that's the destination. Mm hmm.
Starting point is 00:22:31 But maybe it's just because I'm from there. Yeah, it's just because you're from there. I would go, I think, Bermuda. Ooh, I want to say Bermuda, too. I want to say Bermuda, too. But I really want to go to Aruba because they have a beach where you can sit with fucking flamingos and feed them. So I'm going to say France. And for those reasons, I'm going to say France.
Starting point is 00:22:59 Yes. Pick a pet. Huh. A wild looking monkey who seems haunted a robot dog i feel like that's good for you because you don't really like animals up in your business you're so right yeah i think this is a crow it yeah looks like a crow or a raven it looks like a crow. Or a raven? It looks like a pigeon pretending to be a crow, actually. It looks like it's in a crow costume. It does. His real head's sticking out.
Starting point is 00:23:33 And it's gray. Yeah, because his head is gray. I think it might be a vulture, actually. Oh. How do they expect us to know what a vulture looks like? I only know it as a big bird in the sky. I don't know what it looks like up close. And the last one is a stinky little pig.
Starting point is 00:23:56 You better give me that little oinker. I love pigs. I also do love birds. I want to hold a bird so bad. It's on my to-do list. Actually, I sent you a bird earlier on Instagram
Starting point is 00:24:13 and someone made a comment in the comment section. I screenshot it to tell you at a later date about bird ownership. And it was like, important things to know before wanting a bird.
Starting point is 00:24:30 Please adopt. Bird rescues are overwhelmed with birds in need of homes. Birds can live 20 to 80 plus years depending on the breed. Yes, 80 plus. Depending on the breed. Exotic vet care is necessary
Starting point is 00:24:47 and can be expensive. Consider getting pet avian insurance. Birds require constant attention and interaction. Leaving them alone for long periods is not sustainable. Keeping birds confined to cages without proper enrichment
Starting point is 00:25:00 is like sentencing them to a dungeon. Birds are loud and they all scream. They are not suitable for dorms or environments with noise restrictions. Birds can suffer neglect and are at risk from dogs and cats. Exotic vet bills can be costly. Avoid using candles, plug-ins,
Starting point is 00:25:20 and harsh chemicals around birds. Use bird-safe cookware. Bird-safe cookware? Why? What does that even mean? I don't know. Do I have to cook for the bird? I can't shake something out of a bag?
Starting point is 00:25:32 I don't. Or maybe, is that what they're eating out of? I actually don't know what that means. Birds are sensitive to smoke and become sick or even die from exposure to smoke. Oh, bird- bird safe cookware. Nonstick cookware such as Teflon can be fatal to birds. Oh. Whoa.
Starting point is 00:25:53 Wait, should we be eating off Teflon if it could kill a bird? I don't think we should. I feel like I've seen many things that are like, Teflon's not good. Here's something I learned about nonstick cookware. You know how you cook in like one of those silver pans without the Teflon? And you're like cooking it and you're like, oh shit, all my stuff stuck to it. I don't know why. Why is that?
Starting point is 00:26:18 You have to preheat the pan. Huh. You can't just be putting shit on it cold. You have to get it hot. And that's how the pan huh you can't just be putting shit on it cold you have to get it hot and that's how the pan works no one fucking told me this instagram fucking told me this this year and then i said that can't be and then i did it nothing was fucking stuck to the pan damn not one goddamn thing and i said who did this? Who? Who was supposed to teach me and didn't? Or why isn't that just like in the instructions on the pan?
Starting point is 00:26:51 Or like, I've never heard that before. That's so helpful. Well, here's the thing, Sasheer. Have you ever read a pan box or the pamphlet in there? No, I took it right out, put it right on the stove, and immediately started cooking something and got it stuck on there. I've never read the instructions to a pan because i'm like i'm not a fucking idiot turns out that was a lie i am a fucking i didn't know i didn't know wow wow wow wow it's frustrating the older i get the more things I learn that like I'm like, I should have just known this.
Starting point is 00:27:26 I know. But also people don't tell us. You all share the information. They're being gatekeepers. They sure don't. Everyone's a fucking gatekeeper. But you know who's not? My little pig. Oh, yes. He wanted a pig. I will take that robot dog because it's true i would really rather not
Starting point is 00:27:48 have a living animal i don't want to clean up any hair i don't clean up any poop i don't yeah i don't want any like uh liquids or things coming out of orifices i don't take it to the vet if anything i just need to change the batteries or charge it and that's great yeah let me tell you i took sir clyde out for a fucking walk today took a shit right in the middle of the road in front of some construction workers and i went to go pull out a bag your friend didn't have no bags so i had to walk all the way back home and all the way back to where we were because i was like i simply can't leave it there. Some people leave dog shit, but I was like, it's in the middle of the road.
Starting point is 00:28:29 It's going to get on someone's tire. Someone might step in it. Also, I would just think about those construction workers being like, that dumb fucking pigtailed idiot left shit in the road. So I had to go back and get it. I was so annoyed. I'm proud of you for doing that. There's so many people who would not, who just like leave their dog shit anywhere and be like, oh, well, it's fine.
Starting point is 00:28:53 Ugh, I can't. I think it's so gross to just like leave excrement, anyone's excrement anywhere. We all have to be picking up our shit or finding toilets. That's right. Either teach your dog to use a toilet or pick up its shit. God, if I could teach Clyde how to use a toilet, all of my problems
Starting point is 00:29:12 would go away. I would find someone to love me. All of my dreams would come true. People would rally and check up on me and love me harder. Life would just be great.
Starting point is 00:29:28 If I could teach this little idiot how to shit in a toilet. Some of those things seem unrelated. No, no, no. I'd be able to flip the flop anywhere. Anything I could do. Anything I want to do on the pole, I could do. I would get new cars. Oh, everything.
Starting point is 00:29:47 Everything would be coming up. Fucking Nicole. If I could just teach this little idiot. He doesn't care. He's not even paying attention to me. He's like, I'm storing up a big one for later. Oh, honestly, sometimes his shits are so big, I look at him and I go,
Starting point is 00:30:07 are you okay? Like, he's so tiny. He's 13 pions. Hmm. He does eat a lot, though. He does. He loves food. So what do you do when you're not clowning around?
Starting point is 00:30:21 Ooh, sorry. That's okay. Oh, reading. Gaming. you're not clowning around oh sorry that's okay um oh reading gaming i'm always clowning exercising these are the wildest things like what i'm hardly ever reading, hardly ever exercising, never gaming. But I also don't think I'd be clowning around all the time. Clowning around all the time seems exhausting. Yes. Reading is hard.
Starting point is 00:31:06 It's like a skill that I don't have very much anymore, except late at night if I need to read something. And exercising, you know, okay, I'm going to turn exercising into pole dancing. Oh. And I'm going to say exercising. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Hmm. I'm going to say...
Starting point is 00:31:24 Gosh. I guess I'll say exercising, too, because I guess of those options, I do that more than anything else. No. Oh, did I tell you about the pole class I took in Denver? No. It was so fun. I was like, wow. So she would have a really good time had she just come to Denver like I asked her to. so fun i was like wow so she would have a really good time had she just come to denver like i asked her to stop asking me to just go to places you're doing stand-up to hang out so rude i was like i
Starting point is 00:31:53 can't believe my friend doesn't want to support me i of course i'm supporting you but i'm not gonna just fly to dinner just like hang out in your hotel room? Couldn't believe it. It was a themed hotel. Thank you. We were on the laughter floor. Thank you. Wait, what was the theme? It was a loosely themed hotel. So it had like Rodney Dangerfield quotes
Starting point is 00:32:16 and then like a big picture of those glasses with the nose and the mustache. And then I went to another floor and I can't remember what the theme was but i was like oh they they say theme and they mean it loosely there's just a couple pictures on the wall oh boy idly that's funny but how was the pole class oh it was so fun and i really thought you would have enjoyed it it was uh i had a nice time we learned like uh two little moves christy nailed one uh no she nailed two she got both of them um and then we got to do like a
Starting point is 00:32:52 little free dance at the end it was fun that sounds very fun what's your favorite of these movies? The Little Mermaid. And hold on. I have not seen the new Little Mermaid, but I was shown the scuttlebutt wrap. Yes. And it is scary. That crab is scary. They do slow zooms
Starting point is 00:33:20 on a wrapping crab who's moving his claws back and forth and I was like, I don't think I could watch the rest of this movie. These animals are scary. It is always strange
Starting point is 00:33:36 when they take an animated film and make it into like a CGI realistic version of itself. Because yeah, they look like real animals, but then they're supposed to be talking and moving and it feels very unnatural.
Starting point is 00:33:53 I will say the Scuttlebutt song is so fun. I loved it. It is fun, but the slow zooms took me out of it. That was scary. The slow zooms on this crab with these itty bitty little eyes. Oh, haunting. That's very funny.
Starting point is 00:34:14 Oh, Dracula is another movie. Star Wars. Or none. No movies. That's insane. The Little Mermaid, Dracula, Star Wars, or you don't get a movie? Those are the only options.
Starting point is 00:34:31 Oh my God. Oh my God. Well, definitely not Star Wars. I don't think I've seen Dracula, but I do love the original Little Mermaid so much. So I'm going to say the Little Mermaid. Yeah, I'm also going to say the Little Mermaid. That's my favorite movie.
Starting point is 00:34:51 I also love the new version of it. I have not seen Dracula, I don't think. I don't think so either. I guess I should go see the new Little Mermaid. I don't know what I'm waiting on. I do want to see that Barbie movie. movie. Oh, yeah. Can't wait. I love all the promo around it. Oh, my God. We went and saw Spider-Man, which was so good. I gasped at the end. I was stunned. But we walked in and I was like, I love all the Barbie promo. And then there was a big Barbie box and I stepped right in and started screaming.
Starting point is 00:35:26 Oh, I had a nice time. Okay, a building is burning to the ground. Oh my God, what do you do? Run inside and save people. Walk from a distance. Try to distract the fireman. my god pop popcorn pour a comically small amount of water on the fire absolutely nothing live stream run around in circles oh you know what i forgot what this quiz was about. And it's about clowns.
Starting point is 00:36:07 So now all these options make sense. But I was like, what a heinous person to try to distract the fireman or pour a comically small amount of water on the fire. But that's what a clown would do. That is what a clown would do. Oh, my God. Gosh. I would say watch from a distance because it's the only one not actively ruining what's happening. It's not making things worse.
Starting point is 00:36:37 Yeah. Okay. I'm not running inside to save people because that's scary. Pop popcorn seems insane. Have I rolled out a microwave? Try to distract the firemen. Absolutely nothing. Pour a comically small amount. Oh my god. I guess run around in circles.
Starting point is 00:36:53 That seems pretty Nicole. Like, I don't know what's happening. No! No! Alright, this is Nicole's. I can't believe it. I'm a mime? This is Nicole's. I can't believe it. I'm a mime.
Starting point is 00:37:07 This is barely a clown. The same way you are barely tolerable. You always have to be different, don't you? Whoa. BuzzFeed. They are. That was really aggressive. You always have to be different, don't you?
Starting point is 00:37:24 Oh, my God. And this is Sashir's. that was really aggressive you always have to be different don't you oh my god and this is so she is you're a fish clown or isn't it clown fish sure whatever uh you live in an you live in an you live in an and no whoa how do you say this? Anemone? Anemone? Anemone? Anemone? Anemone? Anemone? You live in an anemone and have a symbiotic relationship.
Starting point is 00:37:58 Okay. Kids love you and so does the pet industry. Okay. Wow, cool. So you're loved by everybody and I'm a mime. You remind that's barely a clown and you just always have to be different. Wow, you're a fish clown.
Starting point is 00:38:21 No one has ever said fish clown. It's a clown fish. Yeah, it's so weird. Oh my God, weird god buzzfeed hates me that was so mean it was really aggressive for no for no reason i can't believe it oh my god should we try to help people i don't know if i'm in the mind space the mime space oh he made it worse okay we have an email yes this is an update from uh i believe the last episode we talked to someone who was grieving uh their a breakup and uh the good things that were happening in their best friend's lives and they wrote us back so here it is okay Okay. Hi, team best friends. You took my call on the latest pod. I was the bad friend. I was the bad friend grieving a breakup, feeling like my life was out of control and feeling shitty
Starting point is 00:39:33 for being not super present for my pregnant bestie. We've been friends for nearly 15 years. I hate that I'm grieving while she's going through this amazing time. And it's been so isolating. Thank you for hearing me out. I burst into tears listening to the beautiful words everyone shared. Everyone on this show is a gem, truly the best people, sending you all the best wishes for your own seasons of abundance. Hopefully you're all in them. And if not, that they're around the corner for you, sending you all so much love and love to the Besties community. Thank you, Nicole and Sashir, for letting us into your friendship, Jordan, Kimmy, and Judith. Thank you for the beautiful words, for supporting the show with your work, and for keeping the giggles going in the background.
Starting point is 00:40:18 Nice. That is nice. Also, I didn't know that about perimenopause. The work being done. Thank you all. That's nice. Also, I didn't know that about pre or perimenopause. The work being done. Thank you all. That's nice. That's nice. Cool.
Starting point is 00:40:32 Yeah. Now that we know we've helped people, let's help more. Let's help more. Hey, Nicole. It's Shashir. So this is Catherine. I recently went out with a friend on Pride weekend. Actually, I went out with a couple of friends, but this particular friend, we've been friends for over 20 years now, and we went out with her fiance. I personally am engaged as well. I've been with my partner for now
Starting point is 00:41:06 eight years. And so we went out to the gay clubs. You know, we had a good time. We've always, both of us are both queer, you know. But her fiance, who's a older male, an older male had an issue with how affectionate that we were. And I can only recall me like, you know, like slapping her thighs to wake her up because we were at a new spot or, you know, like we kissed goodbye a couple of times on the mouth, but it wasn't really a lingering kiss. So I'm not really sure what he's upset about. But then he messaged me like two days later and said that he was breaking up with my friend because we have like he sees the connection that we have and that we should be happy together. And I hope we have a good life together.
Starting point is 00:42:02 And he's upset that he didn't see it sooner. And it was just a really weird together. And he's upset that he didn't see it sooner. And it was just a really weird text. It caught me off guard. And then so I didn't respond to it. I then texted my friend about it. And she said everything was cool. You know, whatever.
Starting point is 00:42:24 And then he texted me again. And then he was like, oh, it is what it is. I'm still breaking up with her, you know? And then the next day I responded and I was like, do what's best for you, man. Um, I, it's never been like that between us, but hey, whatever you're feeling, then feel how you feel. You're entitled that um well a couple days later I actually called and talked to my best friend and she ended up three-way calling him with me and he just said it was just really disrespectful how we treated each other in front of him and I don't know is he overreacting are we under reacting I feel like we just have a different differences difference of opinions and how love between friends and partners go so if you could help me on this that
Starting point is 00:43:20 would be great I love your. I love all your shows, Nicole. I love Home Economics, Shashir. Yeah. Thanks. Bye. Hmm. I feel like this person's overreacting. I agree.
Starting point is 00:43:43 Yeah. I feel like it's a little wild to be like i and this person who called in his partner right yes and also everyone's partner was there yeah i feel like i don't know i feel like maybe this person doesn't get enough love outside of romantic relationships like i've kissed friends on the lips. Like, it's... What? It's not...
Starting point is 00:44:08 Huh? You... What? I've never gotten a kiss on the lips. You've never gotten a kiss on the lips? From you. Surely I've given you a kiss on the lips. Probably on stage.
Starting point is 00:44:27 Yeah. All right. That counts. I guess so. It's just like not a like a social. Actually, it is social. There's people there. And if anything, it's more than just a kiss at a bar because people are watching.
Starting point is 00:44:46 Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. All right. Cool. Um, yeah, I think this person is really overreacting and I'm not sure how to approach it other than like what they've done where they were like, it wasn't no thing. And I do what's best for you,
Starting point is 00:45:06 but there was nothing between us. Also, this person, it might not even be about the kiss. This person might be using that kiss as a scapegoat to be like, that's why I'm breaking up with them. Oh, interesting. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:20 Because they sounded very final and, like, sure of themselves. Because it wasn't like a question. It wasn't like, hey, is there something going on between you two? Or like, I'm just a little worried. It was straight up like, I'm breaking up. I hope you two are happy. It sounds like a seven-year-old.
Starting point is 00:45:37 It sounds like a little child like being like, I hope you have a great life together. I can now see I was blind before. What? Grow up. Yeah. I also really don't like that the best friend put the person who called in
Starting point is 00:45:55 on a three-way call with their partner. Really, the person who called in isn't involved. They actually don't need to be involved in any of the conversations at all and probably have been involved with too many like the guy actually even if he actually did want to break up because he thinks that his partner and this person who called in have a thing
Starting point is 00:46:17 going on you still don't need to reach out to the person the other person that's a conversation between you and your partner and that's it i. Yeah. I'm not getting good vibes from this person. I don't think you should cut them out of your life, but I think maybe boundaries could be had with them. And I don't know what those boundaries are. I just really, I don't know. In my old age, I cannot imagine saying to someone, be happy together. I'm breaking up with you. I'm like, this doesn't involve me. I don't actually need to explain myself at all because I did. And also there's no further information I can provide to help you with whatever you're thinking.
Starting point is 00:47:14 It's not on me. Yeah. Yeah. That's a weird situation to be in, but. Yeah. And I'm sorry that you had to go through that. Yeah. Yeah. It doesn't't it's uncomfortable but also that's really not anything to do with you it's really your
Starting point is 00:47:33 your friend's fiance's deal and i hope he figures it out me too because good lord. Good lord. Okay. Let's do another. Should we do another? Yes. Hey, Nicole and Sassier. I just wanted to ask your advice on something. So, basically, I live with two other roommates. One of my roommates goes home to Arizona every summer for an internship with her family, blah, blah, blah. And that roommate that leaves every summer with their, like, love language for their friends is very, like, mothery.
Starting point is 00:48:08 Like, my open door policy, open fridge policy. And me and my other roommate are not quite the same on that just because we don't make as much money or have as much money as the other roommate. So, like, everything we buy and stuff, like, we intend to eat. Like, that's our food. Like, we can't really afford to share it like that. And so basically they had a friend come over a little while ago with only two days notice on our half, which kind of sucked for us.
Starting point is 00:48:32 And then the friend expected us to feed them and made a mess and left the mess in our house, which wasn't the best. And then they laughed and we were very relieved, but they have recently reached out again and asked if they can come for another weekend. And I don't know if we could do another weekend like that. And I could really use the help on how we could politely decline that ask to come over
Starting point is 00:48:52 again, because to be honest, I can't handle taking care of another human, especially one that can afford to take care of themselves. So any advice on this would be wonderful. Thank you so much. You guys are all wonderful beings. Both, you know, Nicole, Sassir, the whole crew. Okay. Love y'all guys.
Starting point is 00:49:10 Okay. Bye. Ooh. I had a friend who was a bad house guest who asked to be a house guest again. And I ignored it. I just ignored the request. But also, it probably helped because it was like, they asked a general question to a group chain,
Starting point is 00:49:31 so I wasn't the only one being asked. But I just pretended like I didn't see it. But I guess you could... Oh, God. How do you use decline? I think maybe it's like hey uh it felt a little chaotic having a new energy in the house and right now i don't think i can handle uh that again uh maybe at a later date that would work but for now i think just the me and the other person is all i can handle right now i like that yeah right yeah or if you like really are like i don't want to like put a bad taste in my roommate's mouth who's gone uh-oh i
Starting point is 00:50:26 have to sneeze you can say that's the friend thank you the friend who's coming you can make some ground rules it's like we clean up after ourselves you have to bring food um you are it's like we're not you're not a guest yeah this is a place for you to stay like an airbnb where you have to bring food. You are, it's like, we're not, you're not a guest. This is a place for you to stay like an Airbnb where you have to bring the food clean and check out. Yeah. I like that. And maybe that's a conversation.
Starting point is 00:50:56 Maybe if it's awkward to have that conversation with the guest who's coming, maybe it's a conversation you can have with the friend whose room it is so that they can relay that information to whoever staying in their spot because it's like that your roommate should feel responsible for any person they put in their room when they're not there yes so i think maybe if you communicate to your roommate hey like we need everyone who comes in this place to like roommate hey like we need everyone who comes in this place to like make make sure they treat it as if it is their place or like treat it as if it's your place and not like a hotel and just
Starting point is 00:51:32 like you know do basic things like clean up after themselves etc uh then hopefully they can handle that and and then if you feel any pushback or like, she's like, oh, it's fine. Then you can be like, okay, then actually we don't want any guests. We actually, you can't have any guests in your room while you're gone. Sorry.
Starting point is 00:51:57 Yeah. And I feel like there's something to be like, the three of us, our dynamic works. Yeah, yeah. Somebody else, like the energy just is like not there for me. And it's kind of tough to live like that. I know it's two days, but I just would love peace in my house. I like that. I like that's a smart tactic, too, to make it more positive. Like I love our dynamic when the three of us are here. But since you're not here and then there's someone who else that comes that isn't you it's
Starting point is 00:52:26 hard it makes me yearn for you actually i'm in love with you i just miss you so much let me kiss you can i go to arizona with you can i be your family can I move in with you in different ways? Moves out completely. She's like, goodbye. Mm-hmm. Solved. Okay, great. If you have any questions or queries or updates for us, you can email Nicole and Sashir at gmail.com or call
Starting point is 00:52:59 or text 424-645-7003. We also have merch at podswag.com slash best friends. Oh, we have transcripts for our new episodes. Check them out on our show page at earwolf.com. Lastly, don't forget to rate, review, and subscribe. That's the easiest way to support this show a little secret at the end just a little secret for you okay bye nicole goodbye

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