Best Friends with Nicole Byer and Sasheer Zamata - Sasheer Says Sh** Talk With Facts…not Fiction!

Episode Date: April 3, 2024

Hola amigas! On this episode of Best Friends, we find out that Sasheer loves dainty accessories while Nicole loves big buckles and chunky jewelry. Nicole is fascinated by how some foods were invented, including cupcakes, lollipops, brownies, and more. Sasheer explores what life would be like in another dimension. So does Nicole. They both explore existential questions about people’s purpose on earth, how time really works and how old the universe is. Plus, they answer your friendship questions about a friend judging people with mental health issues and what to do when a rumor is affecting a friend group. Sasheer is all for shit talk with the truth, not lies, rumors or speculation. Nicole gives hilarious examples. This was recorded on March 8th, 2024.  Sources: Amelia Simmons invented Cupcakes:https://azideliciouscupcakes.com.au/history-of-cupcakes/#:~:text=Who%20invented%20the%20cupcake%3F,made%20in%20Eliza%20Leslie's%20cookbook. George Smith invented lollipopshttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lollipop#:~:text=According%20to%20the%20book%20Food,the%20lollipop%20name%20in%201931. Algorithm is named after Muhammad ibn Mūsā al'Khwārizmīhttps://towardsdatascience.com/how-did-we-get-here-the-story-of-algorithms-9ee186ba2a07 What is the internet?https://edu.gcfglobal.org/en/internetbasics/what-is-the-internet/1/ Little Mermaid and Atlantishttps://littlemermaid.fandom.com/wiki/Atlantica#:~:text=Atlantica%20is%20most%20likely%20based,that%20the%20term%20was%20coined. How old is the universe?https://press.princeton.edu/books/paperback/9780691156286/how-old-is-the-universe How old is human civilization?https://education.nationalgeographic.org/resource/key-components-civilization/ No BuzzFeed quiz this week.   Email or call Nicole & Sasheer with your friendship questions at:[e-mail] Get access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using this show link https://siriusxm.com/friends and code FRIENDS.

I saw Selena's real husband. Hi, Sashir. Hi, Nicole. I saw Selena's real husband. Okay. And the casting in the movie? Great. Oh.

Mm-hmm. Good. Look just real husband. Okay. And the casting in the movie. Great. Oh. Mm-hmm. Good. Look just like him. Yeah. Yolanda's parole's about to happen. Don't let that bitch out. I don't want her out. No one does.

She took Selena from us. Yeah. And I'm honestly surprised she made it this far i mean i think she'll get killed as soon as she's released but um it sucks because i found selena from the movie do you know what i mean yeah if yolanda hadn't been yolanda ing i would have discovered her with her crossover album and would have been her biggest fucking fan. Yeah. God. Yeah. I love that movie, though.

It's a great movie. You know, J.Lo's a star. Yolanda will become eligible for parole after 30 years of prison March 30th of 2025. Next year. So it's next year. Yeah. I really don't think,

I don't think they should let her out. Yeah. Lying, saying she didn't do it or she didn't mean to yes you did bitch yeah you was embezzling yeah you you did it you poppity popped you're rude rude jayla's best performance really is yeah i can see why she has hit the heights she has hit i too would have believed in her if i was like a studio executive who saw that movie I'd be like oh my god

this woman a tour de fucking force I watch it on movies on movies I watch it on planes constantly I broke for a second I was like I don't want a movie you can't watch a movie on a movie

no you sure can't can I ask a wild question please do you think JLo's career would be the way it is if Selena did not die and that movie was made Jordan that's like a chicken or the egg question

I don't think so. Because what did she do before, other than be a dancer on... She was a fly girl. Yeah, be a fly girl. But, like, she must have done something before Selena, but I just can't... I don't know. I think that's what broke her open. That's definitely what broke her open, yeah.

Yeah. I mean, I feel like after that, it was, like, skyrocketing. Yeah. Huh. No, I don't know. But... yeah i mean i feel like after that it was like yeah skyrocketing yeah no i don't i don't know but i would take selena back over j-lo's career which is i think something no one has asked me to make a choice on i mean yeah it was like if people were like just the this life, take back the loss of a life. I think they'd choose that.

Yeah. Yeah. I'm on the hunt now. So for years, I've been on the hunt for a jumpsuit that looks like Marissa Tomei's in My Cousin Vinny when she's stomping saying my biological clock and the purple dress that she wears in the courtroom scene at the end. Have yet to really find it but i think i really want a maroon jumpsuit like selena wears yeah and i think it would look really nice on me yeah um i don't think i'll do the bell bottoms i think i might want it to be like tapered but i i think i want sparkles too so that's what i'm on the hunt for now great that is so specific but i believe in you that's what I'm on the hunt for now. Great. That is so specific.

But I believe in you. Thank you. Well, I was on the hunt for colorful 90s high-waisted jeans. You better believe eBay served them right up to me. Yeah, you found them. I did. Yeah. And they have all the colors. Oh, thank God. Oh, remember that jumpsuit that i bought and i sent you the group chat a picture of yeah and i was like what bra do i wear yeah better believe i found a bra you found a bra what kind of bra on amazon.com it's called a low back bra i said a low back for my wide back wow that's a tongue twister and i tried it on and it's great oh great it's so low it's like by my fucking waist oh and it's supportive yeah there's under wire i almost just said under cups and i was like no under the cups is the under wire there's a it's an underwire and it's like a long line bra so it's kind of like a tank toppy feel okay and then the back is just open wow yeah i'm so glad yes i can't wait to wear that

jumpsuit with my big belt i'm very excited to see it and i said big big belt like that because it's one of the biggest belts it's a very big you can own yeah that you're legally allowed to own it's the biggest belt on the market. Yeah. Where did you get that big belt? I couldn't tell you. I think I Googled like plus size belt with a big buckle. And it was like, how big? This big? And I was like, ah, it's so big.

It's so big. It takes up like half my body. Yeah, but it's nice. God, I love it. I'm trying to get into belts. Oh. I'm wearing a belt right now, and it's the first time I've done that in a really long time. Stand up.

You don't have to. I see it. Yeah, this is a little gold belt. Ooh, that's a teensy little belt. It's a teensy little belt. You love a dainty accessory. I do. Yeah.

I'm not... You're not chon Yeah. I'm not, I'm not. You're not chonky. I'm not chonky. No. Like little, little thin accessories. Yeah. We're different in that way. Yeah.

I like a chonk. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Like my necklace is pretty chonky. Yeah. It's on the inside. Now it's on the outside. You can it yeah that's just one of our differences yeah

I think I'm gonna get into belts get into belts but here's the thing I have trouble with I keep I like this like braided belt that I have I don't know why I'm referencing like I'm like it's not here but I keep buying it too long and I it's it's too much and I I need to go to a store and try on a braided belt yeah so I can ensure that it's the correct width and size I want

I believe me but I'm like what store do I go to? Who has the belts? So sure, who has the belt? Nordstrom? Mmm. I feel like a mall would have the belts. Maybe. Yeah.

Would you like to go with me to a Nordstrom? Yes. Really? Not really, but I will go. It's just because I don't like mall malls.

I know. I once took you on a mall stroll and I said, she hated this. And I said, I'm self-conscious. I'll't like mall malls. I know. I once took you on a mall stroll and I said, she hated this. And I said, I'm self-conscious. I'll never suggest another thing again. No.

It's just like if we went to the Americana, I would have liked it. I think because I need open air. Oh, yeah. It was the Galleria. Yeah. I don't like the Galleria. And I don't actually feel physically good in a mall. Yeah.

Because it's like Vegas. It's meant for you to shut out the outside. It's not sunny. There's no air. Buy, buy, buy. Buy, sell, buy. It's Wall Street. And I can't. I'm not prepared. I get it. I get it.

Is there a Nordstrom in the Americana? I think so. Oh, there is. Okay, let's go there. And they have a Sprinkles? I think so. Oh, there is. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, let's go there. Yeah. And they have a Sprinkles? I love that. Who did it?

Who said, make the cake smaller? Who did it? Who did it? I guess that was an insane way to ask that. But like, truly,

who said, make the cake smaller? I think it was Marie Antoinette. No, I'm just kidding. It was Amelia Simmons. I didn't know there was an answer for this. Grandmother of Kimora Lee Simmons? Just kidding.

That's her married name. Yeah, not Russell Simmons. Well, I'm a feminist okay so amelia simmons uh invented the cupcake in 1796 when when uh he he wrote uh a recipe called a light cake to bake in small cups. In her book, American Cookery, that sounds funny. American Cookery? It sounds like a slur. You fucking cookery!

This nasty-ass cookery bitch! American Cookery. Oh, interesting. Okay. I just don't how do you like how does she get to the point where she was like i put it in cups i put it in cups and then people are like hey it's okay i mean it's it's brilliant i love everyone having an individual cupcake instead of having to destroy a cake. Yeah. Massacre a cake.

Let's not massacre a cake. I mean, if you think about it, inventions are crazy. Inventions are crazy. Who the fuck came up with a brownie? Grind up the chocolate. Make it into a powder and get me eggs from those. I think those chickens have something we can eat put it in the powder

do you think it was that urgent when they were making brownies get me the chocolate powder it up it was a fire happening behind them it's just chaos around them put it in the fire. But it's our house!

We're gonna have a treat soon. I like how you say inventions, but you keep just naming face-to-face goods. That's true. I mean, inventions are crazy. Lollipop? If you really think about it, somebody said, I want candy for a while.

And I hate holding it in my hand and licking it. Stick it in my mouth and be done. George Smith. Okay. Started making large hard candies

mounted on sticks in 1908. He named them after a racehorse at the time, Lollipop, and trademarked the Lollipop name in 1931. Hmm. Wow. Wow. Now that's something. Imagine seeing a lollipop for the first time. You're like, what's in your mouth?

Why are you eating a stick dude and they're like joke's on you it's candy it's wild as wild and then the person who put gum in it well they said or tootsie roll oh my god they were really going crazy they really were you know it's nuts it's nuts like how do you think they arrived at gum or like tootsie roll do you think someone put a piece of ham in a lollipop at one point and they're like you can get candy and then something savory and then everyone's like no let's keep it sweet So you think there was like many trials until they eventually got to gum?

In my brain, yes. They're like, ham? No. Celery? No. That's gross. Grapes? No.

Closer, but it's weird. It's just a circle in a circle. Bread? Ah, man, it got too soggy. in a circle. Bread. Ah, man, it got too soggy. I don't think it took them that... I don't know if they had to jump that far.

I think you're probably right. It's really crazy if you think about it. It is crazy. Pop-tarts? Yeah. That's nuts. If you think about food and how it's prepared and how it... Look, spaghetti.

Like, what? Someone said, get the tomatoes, mush them up. Cook them up. Get me the cow grounded up. Well, now you're just talking about pasta sauce. Yeah, pasta sauce is nuts. Yeah. Pasta is crazy.

Flour and egg. Did you know that's all it is? Is that all it is? I saw this lady with dead eyes making it for her kids. Yeah. And it was flour and eggs. And she just like mixed it slowly together and then put it through this like strainer thing. Wow.

And I said, oh my God. But I don't want to make pasta. She has dead eyes. That's what it does to you. You start making pasta, it just kills you from the inside out. Wow. I'm really marveling about food right now inventions are crazy a hamburger yeah put the meat between the bread imagine like it could have gone so differently there's a world where instead of buns two things of meat and then one one little slice of bread

in the middle oh and then lettuce on the outside whoa could have been in another in another dimension that's how people eat hamburgers oh my god isn't that crazy that is crazy in another dimension there's a sashir recording a podcast podcast, but she has, like, hair. I like this multiverse where it's just the same thing, but slight variations. It's honestly you running upstairs in a striped shirt and coming down in a different striped shirt. That's a callback from last week. From last episode. And we definitely didn't record it on the same day,

one after another. There's no way. I just remembered it. God, such a good memory. Oh, boy, oh, boy. Okay, so let's pretend a multiverse is real okay what do you what do you what would you what do you think you want to see in a multiverse oh or yeah what do you want to see okay so multiverse different life stuff uh what would you want to see sashir in a multiverse doing

okay you've traveled to the 18th dimension okay what's she doing so sheer is um she is uh maybe she's well this is hard because i don't want her to have a better life than me oh but i also don't want her about have like a worse life. Maybe she's in a band. Oh. Yeah. Maybe she's in a band touring and like

being a rock star and stuff. And like writing songs about all her lovers. yeah many lovers okay all right and uh and and and and she's like messy oh yeah okay wow okay so you created a worse life for yourself because I don't seem to be involved.

What if you're in the band? Great, thank you. Cool, I'm so glad. What's 18th Dimension Nicole up to? I'm in a band. And I have a mohawk. like storm in the comic books and I wear a lot of green and I had a baby but I don't raise it my mom does because she's still alive in this dimension okay I just watched the flash and it's just burning in my brain.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Nah, my mom's dead there too. I can't have my alternate reality version of me having a nicer time. Yeah. Okay, so... Well, it's like

the Doctor Strange movie, the Multiverse of Madness. Did you see that? Yeah. Yeah. Did we see it together? No. No. Okay. Did we see it together? No. No.

Okay. But where Wanda, Scarlet Witch, has kids in all the dimensions except for hers, which is crazy. Yeah, which is pretty wild. Yeah. It's like, why me? Yeah. It's like, well, because you have to bring the drama. Got to bring the drama.

You're the main character bitch kill kill kill kill kill kill oh boy yeah i'm in a band i wear a lot of green i scratch it i don't want a child uh i don't want a child in any verse yeah um but i do have a turtle okay because i like green yes wow we love this my God. I saw a video of people dressed as the Ninja Turtles getting a pizza delivered and the pizza man runs away. Why? He was scared?

I don't know. I don't know if he knew. Because you have to remember, young people might not know who the Ninja Turtles are. So they're just like, what the fuck? But a new Ninja Turtles are. So they're just like, what the fuck? But a new Ninja Turtles just came out recently.

So I feel like even if you didn't grow up with the cartoon that we saw or any of the movies we saw when we were young, like, I think you're, you at least saw a billboard

or like were aware of the new one that came out, right? Or maybe not. I don't know. Maybe it wasn't served to you on TikTok. Maybe not. Maybe this idiot just is on TikTok all day

and has no idea what content is or what movies are being made right now. I don't know. Or maybe it was a staged video. It was probably staged. It really sucks. It does suck. I don't like staged videos.

I don't like AI. No. I sent you a picture of a braid store with two big braids on the side. And I was like, this is so cool. And then I was like, oh, is it AI? I don't know what to believe anymore. It looks too... Yeah.

Me either. It's really scary. Should we get into conspiracy theories and fall into a deep, dark hole? Oh, no. Yes. It's just really frustrating. Yeah. Because I want to believe real stuff.

I know. I keep seeing things where I'm like, ooh, cool couch, beautiful dress. Oh, it's AI. Yes. Why did you show this to me? I can't get it. Yeah. This sucks.

It's like the wonka thing we talked about that right did we i don't know i don't think so have we what about wonka that was an ai thing i mean what specifically uh the pictures that promoted the wonka experience in like england or whatever oh that i think even the movie yeah no i say yes the wonka experience in where was that like dublin or something? Glasgow. Glasgow. Yes, that was crazy. Yeah.

And very funny. And that's just going to keep happening. Yeah. But I'm like, how come the internet doesn't want to regulate it? Or like whoever runs the internet. I don't know. Where's the internet? Isn't it crazy?

It's just this thing. Yeah, it's weird weird i don't know but i feel like the government has to regulate it someone has to regulate it yeah right also i saw online that i don't know if this is a bit or not but they were like apparently al gore was like advocating for the internet and they're like that's what algorithm means and I was like I simply won't look anything else up about it but I will retain this in my brain for later no way I don't think it's true I don't think that's true I didn't look it up I just watched the video and I said well I'll put that in my mind to say out loud later with confidence wait can we look up if Al Gore is why algorithm is I don't think that's true I don't think it's

true either but I again did not confirm or deny or confirm or unconfirm lord am I getting dumber by the day no no no it was not named after Al Gore But after Abu Abd Allah Muhammad in Musa al-Karizmi. Wow. Sounds pretty xenophobic that we just shortened it to algorithm. You're like, uh, algorithm. We can't say all this?

That's okay. So it's been dispelled. Okay. Rather easily. I could have done that. You just had to do one Google search. It wasn't hard to find at all. I simply don't want to.

I understand. I, oh my God. And that's how fake news spreads. Yeah. Wow. Wow. We just saw the repercussions in real time i saw fake news told you fake news and we dispelled it really easily but a lot of people aren't yeah all you have to do is get on your

phone look it up look that's so funny you know people who like believe those like really like there was this i saw a video of this lady who was like actually joe biden's not president trump is and the guy was like so trump is president currently and she's like yep and he needs to win again because the country's being run by obama and it was like she just kept saying a lot of like things that just didn't make sense and it's like we'll just plug that sentence into the internet it'll tell you what's up. I think also, don't remember where I saw this, but your search algorithm will adjust to what you want to find. You're telling me Al Gore has made it so I only see what I want to see? Yes. Wow. So that lady, when she Googles, is Obama currently running the country

and is Biden a front and is Trump actually the president, something will pop up and she'll be like, that, see, this is what I'm talking about. And it's like your search is like aggregated to like things that you keep searching for.

Yes. This was a documentary that I think we both watched. I think so. Because it's now like comingated to like things that you keep searching for yes this was a documentary that i think we both watched i think so because it's now like coming back to me but again i'm like how come whoever's regulating the internet which to me okay what do you think the internet is like if you like if have you ever like thought about it and been like maybe this is internet like a small man in a room helping everybody who's just like oh they need this oh they need that just running around and like sweating kind of like inside out but not for people for the internet yeah that's what i think it is i i guess i didn't think of the internet as a place. I think it's like, I don't know.

What is it? Yeah, what is it? I think it's a bunch of wires. It's a vast network that connects computers all over the world. And that's not a real sentence. What's a network? I guess it's like waves. It's okay. If you like really start thinking about,

I ended my therapy session the other day with my therapist going, I think we're asking a lot of existential questions right now that we simply don't have time to get to. And I was like, fair. Cause I'm like, if you think about it, sound is crazy. You were talking about sound therapy? No, I don't remember what specifically I was talking about.

But I was like, just like, the way humans are are crazy. And I'm like, oh, I think I said, why are we here? Oh, she's like, we can't get into this. It's not like a new thing. But I simply was like, why? It's dark, but I was like, people who don't want to die, die. And people who are indifferent about life have to just keep living. Why?

Why does that happen? That's a downer of a question that we could cut out if need be. No, we have to cut it out. Yeah, I don't know. Like, I feel like there's things that say, like, there's like a life's purpose. Like, we're all here to learn a lesson. And if you believe in reincarnation, you keep coming back to learn that same lesson until you have learned it

and then you can transcend to a different level. But there ain't no proof of that. We don't know. Yeah, you know, it's like if reincarnation's real, remember that snail I wanted to help across the road? Oh, wait, no, I was with Mateo. You wanted to save a snail. And then we came back and it was crushed.

What if that was Debbie from accounting? Then it's like, I'm getting reincarnated into a snail for someone to step on me in Africa? I hope she learned her lesson. She gotta move faster. Can't just take it all in, Debbie. And then she comes back as Sha'Carri Richardson. She's like, all right, never going to happen to me again.

Yeah, I just, life is crazy. And if you think about like cupcakes, somebody had to think about it. Somebody said, I'm going to make ceramic mugs. Life is great. This is a table. Oh, my God. Somebody said, bring the wood, make a slice, put two slices under it. And this is where we eat from now on.

It's crazy. All these inventors you keep quoting are in dire straits. Everyone's so stressed. It's very urgent. Bring the wood. Give me two pieces of fabric. I gotta carry something. And I'm gonna sew them together and I'm gonna call it a satchel. Like,

give me a cup and a cake. That is true. All of these people have been, they're screaming at people and there's a small child being like, oh my God. They're just running around. Mom said she just wants a tree.

She said, she said, slice it up. She said, bring three slices of tree. Three slices of tree. Well, tree is, is well wood is tree at some point somebody said this tree is wood it's crazy if you really think about it i get asked a lot if I'm drunk or high this is a high conversation

and I'm very much beginning to see why but this is my baseline me walking around the world being like roads! can you believe it? somebody said get me gravel and make it hot heat up that gravel

pour it down this road it's crazy get inside I built a house I built a tree a tree I don't know I tried a tree house?

no I was trying to think of what you would call a house when it's just pieces of wood and stuff because before wood it was tree but I guess if we got to the point of house we have wood a wood box get inside the wood box

oh boy paper towel it's crazy I could go on and on doors somebody said I don't want to see what's going on over there. And I don't want anyone to see what's going on in here either. I'm doing nasty shit in here. I need to shut the world out.

Books are crazy. Someone said, I have a story. And I want others to like go on an adventure with me. Yeah. Books are a really generous thing am I okay am I okay you're a really existential moment yeah I just really just thought about books yeah like the babysitters club we get to go on adventures with these friends am i having an aneurysm something just got unlocked in your brain it really did

coasters someone said don't ruin the slicing tree i just sliced this tree you better not put your cup on the street you better get me a different piece of wood chop over the small little slices and put it in there oh my god someone said we gotta get to space like that's crazy that bunch of people said, okay. Yeah. Isn't that nuts? That's nuts. Because if you said to me now, even with technology,

I got to get to space, I'd be like, bitch, what? Why? But like somebody said that first and then they did it. Yeah. Or they staged it. Oh! I think I told you this story. I did Neil deGrasse Tyson's Star Talk,

and there was a NASA historian on the panel with me, and they usually have a comedian on there to shake things up and make the science conversation a little more fun. And so I was the comedian, and this NASA historian was there, and Neil was asking a question to the historian, like, what was the most difficult part of the moon landing and then I jumped in and said

the lighting and he didn't like that the historian was like well we did go to the moon and I was like yeah I know and then afterwards he gave me this little button of the moon boot footprint and he was like i

like having this because it reminds me of the mission that we actually accomplished and i was like i know i wasn't it was a joke i'm the comedian remember that's so funny and imagine if it was fake and then they're like he's like oh god oh she might tell more people can't we cut this out here we gotta cut it we gotta cut it get her the pen get her the pen god that's so funny did you get more tea yeah oh i got more hot water for my tea oh but now it's probably cold i just don't remember it being that full it was that full at one point and i drank more of it and i fill it back up okay yeah to answer questions or take a test take a test i can give you a test

to take all right give me a test um what's three plus four seven um what's the square root of eight no point something nine what is how do you do square i don't know it's okay but what's the capital of florida tallahassee okay do you? No! I'm just asking questions. Okay. This is fun. And we'll never check. Yeah.

You do me. Okay. It's okay. You got it. It's all right. Six times six. 36. Eight times two.

16. Square root of 12. Can you do that? Six? times two? 16. Uh, square root of 12. Uh, can you do that? Six? Nah. I know, I simply don't know.

I don't know. Um, how big do you think the ocean is? Really big. Do you think people live in the ocean? Cause, okay, hear me out like in wakanda kind of hear me out like 90 of the ocean has not been discovered yet right we don't know if once you hit the floor there's a door and there's people they're like we don't want people to see what we're doing here so they put a door but there could be people down there that's like the whole idea of atlantis right oh yeah yeah i guess in a little mermaid

is that the little mermaid is she in atlantis no that's people who's in atlantis huh who's in atlantis is the little mermaid in atlantis no Huh? Who's in Atlantis? Is the Little Mermaid in Atlantis? No, I think it's just like water people. Oh, so these are two separate stories. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, okay. I think so.

I don't know where they are in The Little Mermaid. I guess I don't know either. One of the most famous... The Little Mermaid is said to have modeled its Underworld kingdom completely after Atlantis. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Oh, she resides in Atlantica. Okay.

Yeah, they didn't even try. Are you kidding? Atlantica. That's funny. Oh, my God. Can you see the history? Is Poseidon? History of Atlantis and popular culture?

Ooh, DirecTV Insider. No, it's in Tomb Raider. Atlantis is in Tomb Raider. And in SpongeBob. I guess it's not really what I wanted. No. Plato told the story of Atlantis around 360 BC. That's early.

Pretty early. The founders of Atlantis, he said, were half God, half human. They created a utopian civilization and became a great naval power. So they used their belly buttons. Hit all their secrets in there. Their home was made of concentric islands separated by wide moats and linked by a canal that penetrated the center. Their navels. Their navels, which were the

centers. Okay, this is going to be a very stupid question, but how do years work? So, is it 1 BC? And then, because BC is before Christ. And then... AD is after death?

Is it? That's what I thought. Yeah, I think so. After the death of Christ? Yeah. Why didn't we just go, like, why did he have anything to do with years? Why couldn't we go one to now? I don't know.

Oh, Anno Domini. Oh, for the year of our Lord yeah it's a way of counting years based on the estimated birth of Jesus Christ BC is before Christ and it's a way of counting years

before estimated birth of Jesus Christ AD starts with year one and continues but how far back do we go with BC yeah

and what year is it now in BC they stopped it says to present day oh sorry ad starts with one and yeah they stopped with they stopped bc when after death there is no year zero uh why do we do it like this this is so dumb how many years have we been here also those who who are not christian why are we doing this yeah yeah no yeah so my year is different than everybody else oh Oh. Oh. Like who believes in. Yeah.

Yeah. Okay. So the universe is 13 to 15 billions years, billions years, billions years old. So why aren't we in 15 billion and one? But that's the universe. How long has Earth been around? Yeah.

How long have humans been around? Yeah. How many years has civilization been, been, that's the universe. How long has Earth been around? Yeah, how long... And also, how long have humans been around? Yeah, how many years has civilization been, you know, poppin'? And type it in just like that. How long has civilization been poppin'? Okay. I'm glad Google understood what we were saying. Mm-hmm. The earliest civilizations developed between 4,000 and 3,000 BCE,

when the rise of agriculture and trade. Who's E? Before Christian Easter? Like, what are we doing? Who's E? Before Christ, even. It was named by, like, a ballet girl. Before Christ, even.

I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. Oh my God. Many people no longer had to practice farming, allowing a diverse array of professions. I don't care about that. Okay. So modern humans evolved in Africa around 300,000 years ago.

So we're in the year 300,000. I know them bitches didn't know what years were and stuff because they didn't invent it yet because somebody had to go, give me a calendar! Quick! Shut up that tree! Break it up into 12 different pages. It does boxes and you

better number it from 1 to 30! And then February, we're gonna get funky! Funky! And they're like, and then February we're gonna get funky funky and they're like I guess we have to go get trays and put them in the boxes interesting interesting wow wow should we answer questions yeah because we have we have too many

questions we should answer other people's questions and nobody will ever have the answers for me yeah i'm sorry okay hi jordan hiith. I have a very complex question. So basically, a friend of mine was over at my apartment a couple months ago, and we ended up talking about another friend and how they're struggling. And I'll name the person. The person's name is Katie, let's just say. So Katie and I are talking about another friend and we're like, oh, they're not doing well. And Katie goes, yeah, they have this, they probably have this mental health diagnosis. They probably have XYZ diagnosis. And they go on and on talking about how horrible people with this diagnosis are, how they're really erratic and hard to be around. And I have that exact diagnosis. I never shared that with Katie. She has no idea. But she literally just spent five minutes

shit talking me and my mental illness. And she has no idea. So I tried to avoid her for several months. And every time she asked to hang out, I just said I was busy. And I thought she was going to get the hint. However, we run in similar circles, and a mutual friend ended up bringing us together. I told that friend what happened and said, I don't really want to go. I'm going to go to support you, but, you know, this person, Katie, really hurt my feelings. And my question is, should I tell Katie what happened? I actually don't want to share this diagnosis with her because of how insensitive she was.

And I'd rather just cut her out of my life altogether. But she does pop up because we run in very similar circles. And she's sometimes there at, like, group gatherings and events. So, um, yeah. What is your advice for this? My initial thought was like, just tell her diva. But then you were like, I don't give a shit about this girl. Um, um, I do think maybe there is a place to be like, Hey, I just feel a little funky about the way you talked about this.

Like, I just take mental health seriously and didn't really feel great that you were so judgy about that. Yeah. So I don't, I'm not feeling hanging right now. Yeah. Yeah. I think if you do feel like you need to talk to this person at all because they keep popping up, and if this person asks directly like, hey, what happened? Why do we have a falling out?

Yeah, I think that's fair to be like, I didn't love how you're talking about the potential diagnosis of our friend. Boom. Put it on the friend. Yeah, you were talking shit about our friend and that didn't make me feel comfortable or safe with you. Yeah. And you don't even have to bring up mental health you don't even have to bring it up although i do wish you were like surprise bitch like in the moment i'm that proving her point she's like oh no you are crazy it is kind of shitty that people have such biases on mental health. Yeah.

I was like watching this Instagram because, you know, that's our education. I could do anything else in the world, but I choose to stare at my phone. And it was a couple like soothing each other. Like they have a song that they sing when like someone's having trouble emotionally regulating.

And all the comments were like, these idiots. And I was like, sure. Maybe it's cringy that they put it online but like they have a way to be okay yeah and like someone might say that and be like wow actually yeah probably do that it's like when you tell like an older person in your family you're going to therapy and they're like huh why would you go to therapy? Should I go to therapy and talk about how my grandma beat me? And it's like, yeah, absolutely. I think people sometimes see things as like corny or whatever. And they're like, that's dumb. And it's like, no, no. Yeah. Chill out. Yeah. And it's absolutely not your job to educate your friend on like the ins and outs of your diagnosis or just like how to speak about mental health in general.

But I'm also assuming that this friend is just ignorant. They don't know. They don't have enough information or don't have anyone close to them who is experiencing anything like this. So that's probably where this these ideas have come from, which is unfortunate. Which, again, not your job to like teach her anything but i feel like if this person knew oh i do have a friend who actually has that thing that i thought was so wild and and like like i don't know negative for whatever reason maybe they'd be like oh if so-and-so is like that and they're managing it or like you

know they're living their life however they live it and it doesn't bother me at all. Maybe they have a different viewpoint on it. Yeah. Like, I watched a video. This man with schizophrenia records himself because he was like, I don't because he has schizophrenia. He's like, I'm not talking to nobody. But then he was like, well, let's explore it. And then he watched himself talking to nobody. But then he was like, well, let's explore it. And then he watched himself talk to nobody.

And I think for him, it destigmatized it to him. And then the fact that he puts it online, I think, destigmatizes the illness in general for people. Because he's like, I don't do anything that harms anybody. I truly will just be in my living room and be like, I don't want pancakes. It's not funny, but like, you know, I don't know. Yeah. Why did I bring that up? Destigmatizing different mental health.

Yeah. So he's like educating, but that's his choice. But you don't have to. Yeah. Yeah. So I guess any answer is OK. You don't have to have this person in your life. It doesn't sound like you don't care.

You don't care. But if it's a thing where it's like, well, this person keeps popping up and I feel like I should say something or at least say something so they can stop bothering me or other friends can stop bothering me about like hanging out with this person, then you could be like, yeah, put it on the friend or just like that left a bad taste in my mouth. Yeah. Solved. Hi, Nicole. I'm Sasha. This might be kind of a long story, but I'm trying to make it short. Solved. rumor going around about her partner saying something that they should not have said. A homophobic comment that a friend of a friend told us.

I just don't know how exactly to bring it up to said friend. His partner actually said this. It's a pretty big deal breaker for the other people in the friend group. I just kind of wanted to get your guys' take. Let's a good conversation start. Again, this is just a rumor. I'm not trying to defend him, but we have no idea. It's a friend of a friend. I'm kind of just bringing this up.

Any advice would be really, really appreciative. This has been going on for a couple of months. We've just been dancing on the subject of bringing it up. And honestly, I'm just getting tired of all of us hanging out and this boy elephant being in the room for some of us but not all of us. Appreciate the help. Thanks so much. Talk to you guys later.

Love the podcast. I don't really like rumors. No. And I'm sick and tired. Sick and tired of being rumors. Rumors. Rumors. Saying what they want about me. we're getting a parent trap too i'm so and a freaky friday sequel yeah oh sorry it was freaky friday not parent parent parent trap but that'd be great't it? But I guess it won't happen. Yeah, we can't ask for too many things at once.

Also, she's an adult. She could play twins still. I would love to see what these twins are up to. Yeah, wow. My statement really makes it seem like I only think children are twins. It is a childish thing to look like somebody else. It's a childish thing to look like somebody else. It's a childish thing. Don't you grow out of that eventually?

Yeah, you fucking figure it out and get your own fucking face. I think my thought process was it was like heavily involved parents. It's like, oh, you're an adult, you know. But yeah, you could do a parent trap with it. Maybe the twins get parent trapped. Maybe their kids trap them to be reunited as sisters because they got in a fight at

someone's wedding. Whip it up, Hollywood! Ring, ring, ring! Hello, Netflix! I got your next blockbuster! What were we talking about? Oh, yes. Okay.

I don't even know what you would bring up to your friend because you don't have anything. There's no evidence here. It's not like, I mean, I don't know what the specific rumor is. the specific rumor is it's like what what was relayed to us is that the this your friend's partner may have said a homophobic slur but we don't know we don't know if it's if it would be more clear if it was like that person said it to one of your friends but that didn't happen, I don't think. So there's nothing to say. And I guess if this person's showing behavior that is in line with that and you just get bad vibes, for sure.

But if you're basing your judgment on this person for a thing that you don't even know is true, you can create a whole story about a person with your little group, like shit-talking this person's partner and being like, of course they parked in that parking spot. They hate the gays.

Like, you just make up a whole thing because of this thing that you don't actually know is true. It's not verified. So I would say, like, don't bring it up because that would also suck. Now your pregnant friend is like oh i guess all my friends think my my partner is homophobic but like we don't know how yeah yeah i i also agree like we're mad about a thing that we don't know if it's true or not yeah yeah i although i do love you saying

talking with your little group of friends being like he parked there because he doesn't like gays and to me he's getting out of like a rav4 in a handicapped spot and it's like well that doesn't make sense well that's simply you have jumped to a very interesting conclusion. But yeah, that's what that's. But that's what it is. When you assume things and believe things that aren't proven true, you start believing a bunch of weird bullshit. Yeah. Also, who started this rumor? Who said it?

She said it was a friend of a friend, which is like, so this person who's not even in the group? Yeah. Yeah. I think it's a non-starter. I think it's just like shit talking. Mm-hmm. In another episode, we talked about how a terrible rumor was started about Tommy Hilfiger. This is true.

Yeah. And you don't want to be that email. Don't be the fake email that went around. No. Don't. Don't. Get truth. Don't be fake news. that went around. No. Don't. Get truth. Don't be fake news.

And here's the thing. I'm not against shit talking to a person. Oh, yeah. Or hating on a person that we all collectively don't like. Find real reasons to dislike this person. Because you can. You can. You can find reasons to hate anybody.

Do that. Right? And then that's a thing you can bring up like look i really hate the way this man wears shoes in my house yeah or whatever like mother theresa i like theresa with an h that stupid bitch she doesn't spell it with an h what the fuck are we doing you could you could hate on anybody who's the nicest person in the world i'll figure out something uh uh paddington bear. Paddington bear? That little shit

is full of it. Stuffing and bullshit. Also, his little rain slicker. He wears a rain slicker, right? Bitch, it don't rain every day. Wow. He's probably funky in there too.

Sweating in the storm. Probably never taking a shower that fucking stuffed animal. They don't get showers. You do that. Yeah. What's something you guys love? Um... animal they don't get showers you do that yeah what's something you guys love um i love bluey who's bluey that's a great start bluey is a is a it's a little kid show

grow up yeah grow up bluey grow up blue the adults. Yeah. Are you blue or not? Sounds wishy-washy, bluey. Yeah. Are you actually blue? Commit. Commit, bitch. Okay. Judith, what do you like? I love Sister Act 2.

Oh, boy! It's a terrible fucking movie, because guess what? It is not a second beat of the first movie. It's a different fucking movie with the same people. How are they teachers now? They were in a convent. You can't just get certified as a teacher in a couple of years.

Why does Cheryl Lee Ralph not want Lauryn Hill, who's obviously talented, to not sing? Because it's not a viable career choice? Oh, okay. We're not allowed to have dreams. That being said, it is a great movie.

I just simply don't think it deserves to be a part of the lineage of Sister Act. Dolores Van Cartier would never become a teacher. Yeah. She just, that's not it. She got famous being a show, like a showgirl slash nun. Mm-hmm. So this is what you should bring up to your friend.

Yeah. Talk about Sister Act 2. If you really have any issues to bring up, it's about Sister Act 2. But I really want to reiterate, I do think it's a good movie. Just a different one you gasp are you all right yeah i did a little tickle my throat okay yeah well you had a tissue and i was

like has she been coughing a lot is it tuberculosis because i feel like people like carry around a speck of blood i guess it is 2024 like you wouldn't be carrying around a hanky covered in blood and i hide it until the end of the movie then i'm like why didn't she tell me how come people were hiding their tuberculosis they could have taken them to the doctor i think of that when it was big i think there was maybe no cure. So they were like, I don't want to stop living my life. I don't want people around me to stop living their lives and treating me like normal. So I'm going to hide my bloody handkerchief and just

finish this cabaret. I have to keep singing. If I'm coughing blood into a napkin, I'm going to sleep, okay? I'm not working harder. This is true. Falling out after singing. Get real.

Get real. Well, this has been a pretty unhinged episode. I would say courtesy solely of me. If you have any questions or comments, you can email Nicole and Sashir at gmail.com or call or text or leave a voice memo at 424-645-7003. We also have merch at podswag.com slash best friends. We have transcripts for our new episodes. Check them out on our show page at Earwolf.com. Lastly, don't forget to rate, review and subscribe.

And also, before you go to sleep tonight, think about all the things that were invented in this world. Like jerky. Why did they dry out the meats? Quick, get me meat! Get me a heater! Bye. Bye.