Blocks w/ Neal Brennan - Tom Papa

Episode Date: June 29, 2023

Neal Brennan interviews Tom Papa (Breaking Bread w/ Tom Papa, We're All In This Together) about the things that make him feel lonely, isolated, and like something's wrong - and how he is persevering despite these blocks. ---------------------------------------------------------- Tom's Blocks: 00:00 Intro/Book 16:49 Doesn’t Get Full 28:41 Lacks Sincerity 45:48 Stares at Things 49:13 Death Doesn’t Scare Him 1:01:37 Sees the Future 1:09:49 Movie Question ---------------------------------------------------------- https://nealbrennan.com for tickets to Neal's tour Brand New Neal Watch Neal Brennan: Blocks on Netflix: https://www.netflix.com/title/81036234 Theme music by Electric Guest (unreleased). Edited by Will Hagle ---------------------------------------------------------- Sponsors: https://bluechew.com code NEAL for your first month free GameTime App Code: BLOCKS for $20 off your first purchase Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Enjoyed your way. Available right away. Hi, Neil Brennan here. I have a Netflix special, Blocks. I have people come on and talk about their blocks, things that make you feel there's something wrong with them. I'm sick of doing this intro. I've done 25 episodes at this point.

I think we all get it. My guest today, ladies and gentlemen, first time, long time, known him, 20, easily 15, maybe 20. You may have seen me around 20 years ago. I don't think we spoke in depth until 15 years ago. When did you start stand-up? 2007. 2007. That's when we like talk talk but i'm sure i saw you at the salad yeah before that yeah it's tom papa ladies and gentlemen it's tom papa we don't have applause here we're we'll figure it out we're still trying to figure out

i hear it in my head yeah of course you do Of course you do You You've written a book You're the first person Who's brought the book It's called We're All In This Together So Make Some Room Let me put it in my single

Nice Very good We're All In This Together To Make Some Room So Make Some Room What What the hell makes you think You could write it

This is my third book So what the hell makes you So the first two The first two Made me think you could write it? This is my third book. So what the hell makes you think you could write a free book? The first two made me think I could do it. Were they successful enough where now it's like a thing you do? Yeah. Great. Yeah. Not successful enough where I can just do that.

Right. Would you want to just do that? And live in Maine and do that. Yeah. But you get hit by a van eventually if you do that right and would you want to just do that and live in Maine and right and do that yeah but you get hit by a van eventually if you do that yeah we're talking about Stephen King my guest today is Stephen King uh hit by a van hit by a van do I want to do that I know well I think the end game could be that it would be a cool thing to be able to do when you're older and no longer traveling and people don't want to look at your old face i remember talking to mark norman and sam morel about it like you think about jones like aging in comedy yeah yeah and you think about and you and i talk

about it a kind of a fair amount uh-huh what's the best case scenario because i remember seinfeld jerry said he's like the amount of people that quit between 50 and 60 is staggering yeah and i understand because they don't unless you're flying private it's hard on your body his era was different too though like he was he told me this a couple years ago it wasn't like yeah but i mean like i was at the store with gaffigan a couple weeks ago and it was like gaffigan me marin uh somebody else jim was like everyone on that show is over 50. and i think that's different i think it's we're able to stay in it longer now you know because we yeah you're able to tour and get an audience.

Everybody has their own audience, and everyone's able to tour in a healthy way. When Rickles and Joan Rivers were going at the end, you know, they would do once a month. They would go out together and maybe a little bit more than that, but you're not going to be doing it a ton. Did you ever see how much joan rivers how much money she had when she died no she had a hundred million dollars really

yeah god well she worked harder than everybody but it's like i gotta i need it and it seemed like she was broke yeah i could be wrong but i remember reading it a couple places jeez well there was that thing when her husband passed right that yeah like had to go like really hard and but yeah that's what i'm saying like where i don't maybe she didn't i also think whenever i think about when you read like bill cosby or comedian big comics in the dick reggard carlin what they made for a week in vegas was good would be good money now let alone then yeah like and then put interest on that right and you end up like oh yeah 100 million dollars like you just end up at quickly at like a very big amount of money i did a thing for her she did she always had like

a thousand things going on i was working on this this TV show in the beginning of a TV show. And I had to go to the writer's room and just kind of noodle around. And then go to her house or her daughter's house when she was doing Joan in bed with Joan. It was like a web series kind of thing. Yeah, I vaguely remember that. Yeah, and you'd sit in her bed and she would interview you. And I was dragging my ass out to Malibu to go do it. And I was like, oh, I have to do this.

I've got to go somewhere before. I have to be in an office and then go out there and do this. And I rolled in, and she had been up since 5, had done like a morning show and guest hosted on something else and then did her Qbc thing and then did her daughter thing and and she was i don't know 70 you know what i mean like but also why it just becomes it's character illogical i always say like with basketball being a good rebounder or defender is about your personality

do you know what I mean? It's like you're a fucking pain in the ass. You're just a pain in the ass. And like she just had to do it. It wasn't for the money. It's like just because she had to do it. She had to do it. No, 100%.

She just, you've met her. I never met her. You never met her. No. I met her a bunch of times. And she's one of those people that you get around and there's like a, you can hear the engine humming. Yeah. Like tick, tick, tick, tick, tick.

You know, like it's just one of those people. It's like, yeah. Yeah. It's the silence of the land. Like you ain't silencing those. Yeah. So I think if I could, I think writing books is like, I really enjoy it. I really like doing it.

Okay. Because I've heard from people it's so hard a lot of comics say yeah and i always wonder what if i would find it so hard because i i like writing yeah as its own thing like i like writing jokes and the hardest part for comedians i think is that it's isolating it's very yeah you really have to shut the world out and go to work every day on it I feel like but I get to go out at night or at the end of the week and get that dose of people

so isolating during the day doesn't really bother me that much but I can see why comedians we don't have are you social like that? I'm social are you like an extrovert do you think? I don't have we're not are you social like that uh i'm so you need people are you like an extrovert do you think um i don't know i'm like i don't know i've never i know it's such a new thing i'm like what's your love language are you like yeah all these new things that seem by the way i heard

a thing about love languages it's just one guy was a therapist and was like i've noticed five love languages there's no there's no double blind there's nothing it doesn't count it's just one guy one guy that figured it out or he's describing one no no it's one guy who figured it out but figured what out like it's not like this is a thing like that for years scientists have tried to figure out the love languages like from ancient fucking cairo there's no it's just one guy was like i just i'm a therapist i noticed there's like five love languages more or less it's like horoscopes though like when you read it you're like i am that yeah no i don't think he's wrong but it's

this funny thing it's become almost like yeah a tenant of right modern like medicine it's like there's nothing yeah there's nothing like at all authoritative about this yeah just one guy i go hot and cold i'm like i i have people over the house a lot you do i do like to like cook for people i like to just bring people in not big huge you know i'm not having parties but you know couple couples or whatever yeah i like that i like i'm social that way but i also don't have an orgy but it's an orgy starts whatever but i don't need to be like you know with people all the time and i don't know i go back and forth i ebb and flow i'm in and i think i'm an introvert i think i i find the idea of people

i get i find it just like I'm going to, and it's not even they're so aggravating. It's my friend Monica Martin has a line, I don't always want to be perceived. Like I just want to exist in a vacuum and not have to worry about you looking at me and your appraisal of it. Are you more comfortable with that one-on-one than putting a special out i mean i like stand-up i like stand-up in that like no i

perceived in a big way when you yeah but good i know i'm gonna write it right i'm gonna write it out i'm gonna practice it and then we'll all meet yeah at that theater we'll get some cameras and i it'll be fair and square and go ahead and judge me but i'm ready for every one of your judgments you know what i mean like you're just like i think jerry said like you're just judged over and over and over and over and over on stage so and it's like good i know what shirt i'm gonna wear i know i'm gonna move more or less i know my internet like i know what dinner but dinner with a couple people i don't mind that's fine i don't mind that because we're doing another thing that i have to do anyway eat but i just i don't a lot of times i just eat

on my lap like i'm saying the perceived part dinner the level of perception at dinner is fairly low because people are worried about if the bread's coming and what should we get and most of the time you're eating with friendlies yeah oh yeah they're always friendly it's just a matter of how i picture people coming over uh-huh and just then like it's all on trial yeah and i don't care about a lot of it like why is somebody the other day was like is your tv at the right height i don't fucking know i don't know i don't know like why is somebody the other day was like is your tv at the right height i don't fucking know i don't know i don't know like why don't why do i have to worry about this now every time i turn it on i'm like wrong height you know for real like it kind of makes me insane my father said mine

was slightly crooked it's not but i think of it you'll never believe it i'll never believe it you'll never fully believe that it's the right you get the you get the bubbles every day yeah if i could keep writing and be like in if i could just do it i probably would eventually interesting i was with an old writer i had to do this um this book event and you know all writers are kind of old i roll in with like this is my third book and i'm like you know i'm really an author now. I've written three books. I'll have you know. I was with Tess Kittredge, who's written 30 books, and Nelson DeMille, who's written 25.

These are not fake author names. These are real people. With, like, whole sections in bookstores. Like I said, it's isolating. Like, these people, they got popular. They've sold, like, 20 million, you know, sections in bookstores. Like I said, it's isolating. Like these people, they got popular. They've sold like 20 million, you know, I mean, real people. And they both are cranking out like a book a year. Yeah.

Because they're in that James Patterson machine. They make a ton of money. They're being advertised on the subway. Yeah, right. Exactly. Like the subway. Fuck, how popular is this guy? I know.

I know. And I don't know. I mean, it's appealing how many they sell and how successful they are and how much money they make doing it. But it's, talk about chain to the desk. I also think it's almost like a vocation where they don't have any. I'm sure they don't have any choice and now they really don't have any choice they don't they just are gonna do it yeah you can tell and they're good at it yeah and they like they've got real skill and this is what you know it's what they do yeah 30 years it's to stephen king it's yeah you can't help it yeah right exactly can't help it yeah

these stories just fall out yeah it's like i can't we can't help it yeah like musicians like i i just melodies yeah i mean i would say word like that too which is like oh just a thing that's what like i was the only comic on this thing you know it was the only four authors and uh we had to do this thing in front of a large audience for the uh bush literacy foundation so i kill because yeah I'm the only comic. You're the only one who can. Yeah. And I just, you know, so I kill and we get back in the van. And then they get laughs and you're going.

And she said, oh, my God, I'm so glad I didn't follow you. How do you do that? And Nelson DeMille's just like kicked back in the van. He goes, he's been doing it his whole life. Of course he can do it. Yeah. And he was right was right i mean and that's why he can write like that yeah yeah you our whole life has been that i've been i've been going walking up in front of people and getting a laugh out of them and that's what the machine does yeah like that's just what it does the machine that you're in and then i mean it's like yeah

it just does i don't know but it's also it's a machine but it's also uh it's a craft like it's something yes it turns you on to keep getting good at it you know what i mean calibrated and corrected and like yeah better habits and all that stuff but what is it a different engine for these i've always thought it was thought it was different but after my last special came out and i had tour dates within a month you know like i had the special came out and in december and i had to be out on the road in theaters in january why'd you do that i didn't think about it okay and also it was like a moving thing like i didn't know when netflix was going to put it out right and uh so i was like wait a minute i write this book had been done i'm like what if i just take

that discipline and put it to the act which i've never done i'm always like well i write but i get like a an idea and then i bring it up on stage and then i'll go back and rewrite it a little and it's slower it just evolves that's just how i do my stand-up I'm like well I'm the same guy writing the stuff let's just push it let's try and push it and write as aggressively as we can on this for the stand-up and it worked like I got a big nice chunk of an act from from doing hard work from hard work but yeah but like i i don't think it's that different i don't think it's that different you know every day you would try to because i don't i've i've been more the the first i'm just like yeah i'll see like i will write an idea down then i'll like what you described i do do a new material show every week so like that's been like the sort of gun to my head yeah well that's the thing i think that's

important i think having a deadline having having a deadline i was scared that i had to go do these shows if i'm writing a book i'm scared of the deadline that has to be in by september or whatever yeah like you have those shows like that wakes you up makes you do something for sure and will you do it that way always now i don't know maybe but you know why like i have i i don't know there's something there is something weird about it like there's something like i so i have this nice act i'm touring with that's what i call it he's a nice he doesn't use a nice act i know i have like there's 15 in there that needs a little flabby yeah a little flabby i'm i'm talking to the audience a little i'm which you know they love but i don't uh because i just like the stuff right and for some reason

i'm not sitting in the shop and just banging making it better yeah yeah yeah like i'm like what is it where am i going but i'm you know don't know. There's a laziness that kind of creeps in. Because I'm not panicked anymore. I'm not panicked. I have the act. I wrote this hour, like, sort of quickly, the one I'm doing. Yeah. Like, because I had to.

Uh-huh. And, like, since I have more or less an hour. Right. I'm like, I'm not. Yeah, you're not scared anymore. Yeah. And so I'm like, fuck, do I have to? Yeah.

Shit. Do I have to make deadlines? Yeah. I don't want to book a show. Because I can picture myself having a show and not having new material. I can picture the panic of that. Of like, I don't got it. Hey, everybody, I don't got it right hey everybody i don't got it yeah

so anyhow anywho as a guy who i don't as a guy i don't see you as neurotic i'm not really but you are generating material from somewhere i i don't I guess I'm neurotic, but I generate material from a different place. I look forward to hearing about your blocks. I'll find out if you're neurotic or not. The first one is not really a block. I think it's just, it's I don't get full. I don't. Ever.

Yeah. I stop eating because it's socially unacceptable to keep going because you'd become a pariah at a certain point if i take one more bite i'm like yeah like if there's a you invite me over to your place never gonna have it go on yeah this is totally not yeah yeah and you're in a smoking jacket and you put out a charcuterie board for everybody. And as you're making my cocktail, I'm allowed to nibble off the charcuterie board. If I was left to my own devices, I would eat all of it. I would just stand there like Belushi and just shove them in my face until it's over. Here's what I can relate to we talked with pete holmes just left

about i have body dysmorphia yeah that i have body dysmorphia maren one time noticed that i was pulling my love handles on stage i have you're a fat guy i only get my fat goes to my stomach and my love handles. Clearly not my face. Clearly nowhere else. Yeah. It's very aggravating. Okay? Because I want to just once have a picturesque body. Just for a day.

You do. I know, but perfect. Okay? Here's what I'm going to say. When people go, how are you so skinny? Your metabolism. It's not really my metabolism. I'm very disciplined.

I eat salad for lunch and I eat dinner. Yeah. I don't have snacks in my house. Sarah Silverman made the observation 20 years ago. Brennan's don't snack. I don't know how she knew it, but she's absolutely right. Because the house, it would have, if there were snacks around when you were a kid. We couldn't have snacks.

We couldn't have. It's like leaving dog food out for a whole bunch of dogs. We couldn't have candy. Candy was contraband to the point, I think I told you this, we would slide it up into our mouth as we were watching television. You couldn't have candy. So we couldn't have, it would have all just been gobbled up. I say that to say this. Every Sunday I have sugar day.

I don't eat dessert. Yeah. And yesterday was sugar day. And anyone that sees me on sugar day is like this is fucking gross i start with french toast and i don't really let up i don't even really eat an entree uh-huh it's just sugar all day and so i get the some people have seen me they're like what is happening you're like the rock yes it's the same idea the the sugar day um i don't promote taramana uh tequila you would if you could i would look if i had my own tequila um but yeah so i get this idea of like there's no off switch here

i am less disciplined in that realm than you for sure and then and well have you tried i guess if you're married you can't i'll dial it in but it has to go to extremes like the the fasting craze really appealed to me like i'm just not going to eat until whenever you know and i'm exercising i trying to i have dysmorphia too i am walk around thinking I'm Chris Farley for sure. So I was fat when I was in kindergarten. When I first stepped out of the house, I was chubby. And kids said I was chubby. Oh, they said something that's weird.

And now I'm chubby forever. You know what I mean? I think you're supposed to be chubby. My body wants to be chubby. I think you're natural. Maybe it's just because I, but what's your mom, dad, brother, what's your family look like? They're all chubby. I like to name what each individual member.

My father is chubby. Yeah. He's got like a round head and a round belly. Like a snowman. He's a strong guy, yeah he's got a belly he's got a hard stomach one of those hard like where it's like a bowl it's a medicine ball yeah and he's but he unlike us has no body dysmorphia he calls everybody else fat he's like let alone this one oh you put on weight and he's got this i have a i know somebody like that i have a brother like that who just goes

and meanwhile it's like, Neil, it's love handles. What are you doing? Yeah. But he just has the balls and nobody comes back at him. I'm like, what about your belly? Like no one would ever say that to him. Yeah, it's hard.

And we're a big Italian family and food is the love language. Yeah. And it's just joyous and fun and I love eating it. Well, that's what I was going to say. It just feels Italian. Yeah. And I just, I could just keep going. I literally don't get full. Have you ever vomited?

Have you ever made yourself, not bulimic, I'm saying have you ever just eaten so much where you're like, now I'm just ill? Yeah. I almost did it last night. If I feel sick, I'll eat through it. Like, I'll just eat more. Yeah.

When I was in college, there was this place called Gatano's Cheese Steaks. I took a picture of Sugar Day to send to somebody. That's the aftermath of Sugar Day. Oh, that's good. It's two. I'll send it. Yeah, it's like a... You know who's got good pastries in LA?

Cantor's. You know the counter? Yeah, I know. I literally went two weeks ago and i was like yeah i'm gonna come to canters every sunday for sugar day now that's a nice that's and i got a like a nice cherry turnover and a it's a nice cinnamon something a cookie not pictured um this place katana's was a cheesecake place and you could drive to it from my college in New Jersey and they were like all the upper class and were like no one can eat one of these cheesecakes there one cheesecake comes out uh cheesesteak sorry cheesesteak comes out on a on a um like

a cardboard box that you carry beer like a case of beer on like that's how big it is it's like this open and it's filled back in the 70s 90s that's how they presented everything on a case of beer that we didn't have plates but a case of empty case of beer they had no tables you had to eat them on your car and the legend was nobody has eaten one and i was so proud of myself that we're all out there and i'm just plowed through this cheesesteak and said i'm going back for more and we start walking across the parking lot as all the guys were just like no oh my god how did he do and i just went and got more and just kept eating it were you still technically hungry probably or like not you were like i could

yeah i could keep going i could eat i could just keep just keep going. Yeah. I'm not craving it, but I don't get full. There's never a time where you couldn't eat. No. When people go, I could eat, it's you all the time. Yeah, all the time. I'm telling myself because I don't want to be a fatty with a heart problem. I stop myself. But other than that.

That's all. Yeah yeah the specter of death all day keeping you totally absolute pandemonium fear of the deadline yeah yeah yes the ultimate um so it's you and i love it what food eating eating just the way you said really sold really sold it would you like the social element or you don't give a you'll do it alone alone from a case of beer

from an empty case of beer alone yeah in your car yeah it doesn't you just like the thing and the

yeah I have more fun with other people but yeah never ask anybody that may not even want to do you go to the bathroom a lot

I would say healthy regular is that multiple times a day for most people that's no i don't think so in the morning okay all right cool i'm i'm a once a day person uh that's how the amount of public i've done is less on lifetime under five. Oh, a hundred percent. I'm under five. I'm with you. Great.

Not once on a plane. I have over a million miles on multiple airlines. I agree. I, I'm sure. No, not once. It would have had to have an emergency.

Never, never, never way. I go on the road. I was just telling somebody about, I go on the road and I, my body just like we know what to do we're not doing anything

we're going to stay let's keep it we'll be back on Sunday Jim Jeffries had that great joke about then when you get to your house your body knows somehow like how do you know where we are

colon how do you know that we are? Yeah. Yeah, it knows. Colon, how do you know that we're near our home toilet? It's such a weird. Yeah. And you talk to it like it is like your pet. It's like, how did you know? Yeah, how did I look at you? You're not me.

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more details and important safety information. And we thank Blue Chew for sponsoring the podcast. Thank you, Blue Chew. This is a good one. I lack sincerity. Now, as someone who's known you a long time, you seem insincere in a funny way. But your tone of voice is insincere.

That's just your tone of voice. I remember Rock cast you in one of his movies as a quick, like, hey, you seem like a 50s salesman. Yeah. So it's true. You are a 50s salesman. Yeah. You seem insincere, but I assume because you're Italian

that you were... I give you all this credit for being a nice guy. Yeah. But not like... he seems incredibly phony that's just his voice in his face don't look too closely into that yeah i you know i was thinking about this one on the way over because because like it's a heck of an admission to make it's a heck of an admission like i'm not sincere yeah well i see people i feel like i'm probably this i don't know most people are pretending to be sincere yeah like

most of people adult life is pretending you mean things that you do not mean but i think that i might be more sincere with you and you kind of encapsulates like all my comedian friends and stuff i see you as kind but like i know you got a knife on you yeah if i have to yeah but i think i have when i wrote it i i meant that i'm not sincere like with the people i love like i'll see other couples and they have like what about other people they have sit downs and they like really they have discussions about how things are going and they uh they like they like really have a conversation about their feelings and it's earned it's allegedly in earnest it's right exactly yeah now you know what they might be full of it too but it seems like they have like well it's people making promises that they don't know they can keep

i mean i try to joke about the marriage vows yeah or it's like do you promise to love on it or all these promises and it should be it shouldn't be i do it should be like i fucking hope so like i don't people are making promises they have no business making these emotional i've given myself no indication i can do this right but i'm i commit and i will be i can pay this loan back me yeah of course and i'll be a different person in five years than i am right now yes but i one thing will remain true i will always repay my debt you don't know what you're talking about um yeah but i feel like uh you know you get in trouble for it as comics yeah i get in trouble for it sometimes with the people that you love yeah i think so because as comics you can't go that deep without

being like this is ridiculous yeah this is a laugh this is a you know what i mean like yes which i think is accurate right and the reason people like us and give us money is because we're calling out yeah places that they're not allowed to and it's true even in the deepest relationships it's like i don't want to live in analysis of our feelings and how this is all going. Let's just – this is good. I'm having fun. You're having fun.

We don't need to go to the deep end. Let's just keep it shallow. I'm sincere about my morality, and I'm sincere about caring about you, but I'm not sincere about my own emotions at the moment in a way and i really feel like when people don't want to do this podcast i'm like i get that yeah i get when people are like yeah somebody left somebody when i was doing the show in new york yeah somebody left and was like yo my man got like a little emotional and a friend of mine told me that he heard that which is like so fucking funny to me yeah that somebody was like ah

yeah like i'm trying to get away from that yeah i think a lot of people are trying to get away from it get away from being uncomfortable about being emotional yeah i people are trying to get away from being emotional oh about from being emotional i think there's a movement now where like everybody's emotional all the time and everything's yes everything's self-help and yes and as somebody who was like a purveyor of it i'm like oh right bull yeah i have a part of my act quit it that's talking about that yeah and i don't know i have a big part of my act that's talking about it now because i'm like a total hypocrite that's interesting because i have thought about you because because you do you you do advocate it and i i say in my acts it's great you have some place oh and you actually gave

me that line about therapy which one it's nice to have somebody to go talk to when your friends and your family are sick of hearing you i mean it's nice that there's a place in the world where you can go call your mom a cunt it's why it costs two hundred dollars because it's worth it yeah oh yeah correct that was your line and uh your line was call your mom a cunt which of course that's what i love about your act you have bits like that that no if i had to go who said it i'd be like i'll tell you who didn't call his mama cunt tom papa there's no way tom papa called his mama cunt in his act there's no way that tom papa said that no men are good men you are that's what i think about that bit all the time. Tom has a bit about like.

Yeah. There's no such thing as a good man. There's great men. My guy is great. I love my guy. He's so great. Yeah. It's like he's great around you.

Yeah. Right. He's not great. There's good guys. Yeah. There's like. No one's great. There's some.

Even good guys is like asterisk right to a point but my point my point about the therapy is like as long as i'm all for it whatever you're into whatever your vision boards your therapy whatever as long as you know you're not going to fix you as long as you know this isn't something that gets fixed it's nice to go talk and blow some steam but we don't get fixed, and we change minute to minute, physically, emotionally. So why would you pay attention to yourself every single minute? Here's the question. What's the, and it runs, I don't, I'm of two minds on this.

I agree with what I'm about to say, and I still remain hopeful. What's the most, biggest percentage you've ever seen a person change in a lifetime? Oh, great question. How? Like 0.5. I would argue. I don't know if I know anyone that's really transformed.

I would argue 10 to 15 percent. And they change because they almost died. Right. That's the only thing. Mm-hmm. It's the only thing. Yeah. And by the way, in order to make that change stick, they have to go to a group meeting every day.

Right. To like fucking stick. Come on, change. Fucking stick to me, changes. Oh, please, change. I'm'm begging you if you weren't here like i yeah it's like i gave everything up to a higher power please make this fucking stick in me yeah yeah i know that's what other people you're right but the other 90 percent walk around by the way thinking i gotta make some changes i gotta everyone has these changes i gotta

do this i gotta do this like nothing like like moving a barge half of a centimeter to the right yes yes like a heavy bar fucking from the fort from the war yeah i have a joke where i'm like when you start dating in your 20s you're like i have i have emotional problems and then in your 30s you're like i'm gonna change my emotional problems then your 40s you're like it's a shame i never did change my like we just don't do it we want to do it can i give you another a line please and then when you're 50, you're like, what do you want from me? That's great. Great.

Great. I am who I am. You knew who I was. Right. Yeah, that's- I never lied to you. Yeah. I was straightforward.

But yeah, I lied to myself. Louis had a great joke similar, which is like, where he's like, I have like so many ethics and morals i don't follow any of them but like i have like i have a lot of beliefs and core value i have a lot of core values none of which i follow i know what i'm supposed to do yeah like i know what ideally what i would do yeah like knowing what you're supposed to do is enough yeah like of the awareness yeah it's i think it's gaffigan's joke about like recycling you have to clean the garbage like what do you what i'm recycling you want me to clean it like come on um but but yeah like just yeah religion is knowing you know the list. You know what the Ten Commandments are. Right.

Like, it's pretty good. Yeah. That I'm aware I could recite them to you. Although I couldn't. Most of them. Yeah. A bunch of them. Yeah.

The sincerity thing. So does your wife. Your wife's cynical, I would assume, right? Not as cynical as you. Not really. No? Not really. The out I give myself is, is well i'm a comedian and

everything's kind of so shouldn't we just enjoy ourselves and we should we shouldn't be fighting we should be laughing can you convince her of that i can and we've been together for 23 25 years in total married for 23 and it we work we operate on that like let's laugh but instead of fight but every once in a while you'll have to you know she wants to know that despite that way of operating that i have feelings in there right nothing makes her happier than seeing me cry interesting does she want to sleep with you afterward because that's the i said the that thing of like women want emotional guys until you cry and then they're like i just couldn't yeah no you know it's interesting uh yes she does okay yeah there's but there's uh i do not like it you don't like crying in front of her i don't right i don't well that's the thing that i would say about you is i can tell you don't like feelings i and i with i it's like

i wouldn't even i'm not i'm not mad at like i get it i get it like i don't i don't like camping yeah like i don't want to do that i don't want to i don't want to rough it i don't want to think about it i happen to just be interested in it. Yeah. But I get the, I totally get the disinterest. It's like lizards. It's like, I'm into lizard.

You're like, you don't, you don't have to be into lizard. You don't have to have snakes in your house. Right. You don't need a terrarium. That's how you must see my, my fixation on emotions and feelings.

Right. But there's something interesting about saying yeah about talking about this yeah and i would also argue that you're good it's funny to watch you say it's funny to watch you talk like i love your the jokes i mentioned like i like the i like when you go when you're blunt and rude and dark it's fucking great yeah do you enjoy being insincere with other insincere people where it becomes like a where it becomes like a barbershop quartet of insincerity where it's just a bunch of people like a doo-wop group of insincerity yeah i feel like ah there is another part of me that is the italian part that wants to know that that you care you know what i mean like there is

that kind of yeah i'm not like a robot you know what i mean like like i do feel but i just don't but i'm not gonna cry all the time you know what i mean the reason i'm saying it is i don't remember who it was somebody goes uh let's go to lunch and be charismatic and i know what they meant they just meant like let's go black dude's called shooting the gift to apply the gift of gab performing lyrical miracles or somewhat less commonly talking people into doing what one wants occasionally both at once gift to get uh-huh i was out shooting the gift shooting just yelling at girls just a gift of shooting the gift i got a gift i'm gonna go shoot it's like the funniest fucking thing it's a lot more fun being with you at dinner right and someone that if

you're gonna shoot the gift yeah i would yeah i'd love to shoot the gift yeah like it's fun with other people that's the fun about hanging out with comedians like we can all shoot the gift uh and like people that can shoot it as good as you but i also think that i also think that once we go and shoot the gift that we are closer for it like i there is a real bond and a friendship there it's yes it's not a business meeting no you know what i mean yes like i've been with comics where you leave and they're like well this is what we're supposed to do comedians to comedian it's like well no we're friends like aren't we yeah like maybe maybe i get a kidney out of this if i need a kidney like maybe do you feel that yeah there's a sincerity to the insincerity that's what i was just there's an there's an integrity that's what i was just thinking to the to the shooting the

gift shooting but again as you asked me to put together the list the list of things that you know there might be something wrong with me maybe Maybe. I see other couples and they have this other way of talking. But I also think there's something to, there's a 12-step thing of like, you're only as sick as your secrets, right? Which, when your secrets are about drug use and stealing money and all this, it's like, yeah, there's a part of me

that thinks it would be really funny to die having gotten away with a bunch of shit don't you think it happens all i know it does yeah and it's got to be really satisfying yeah like i got away with it whether i'm not talking about murder i'm just talking about whatever like a little cheat like i cheated once yeah or i stole money yeah like i cheated on my wife one yeah i met we were married for 57 yeah it's a fucking who cares i didn't pay for anything yeah yeah whatever like i like the idea of going through life shooting the gift being glib and then you die. Like I was full of shit and I died and I never had to not be full of shit because I really didn't want to have to talk about my feelings or anything. It's that generation that when I first saw your act, you talked about like dads from the 50s and 60s and 70s.

about like dads from the 50s and 60s 70s that generation who like yeah told their wives they loved them on their anniversary right in front of everyone and it wasn't even i love you it was you know i love you it wasn't like even a declaration exactly you know you know how i feel about you yeah i'm not going to say them but you know give you You tell me. Now, let me be clear, though. I don't think my lack of sincerity is being full of shit. Like, if I roll into the comedy store and we're all in the hallway, I don't hit there like, hey, hey, hey. I know what you mean. You know what I mean?

Yeah. That's why I was saying, like, I think I'm more sincere with you and Maz Jabrani and jim gaffigan than perhaps my sister there's a understanding yes that like they're right there's a shorthand exactly but and i don't think you're full of shit but i think i'm not coming in like rodney at the country no of course not no i don't think you're full of shit I'm not coming in like Rodney at the country club no of course not no I don't think you're like busting balls there's a difference between busting balls and shooting the gift no I don't think you're busting balls I'm saying

I understand the impulse I don't think you're like a bad guy I just understand it's like I don't want to it's like I don't want to have to do all that it's like wearing a don't want to have to do all that. It's wearing a costume, but it's a different.

It's like, what do I got to do? It's like when you get invited to a party and they're like, it's a certain kind of. You're like, fucking come on. I got to have feelings. All right. I stare at things. Yeah. Tell me more about that.

I don't know. I think it's a pandemic holdover and i don't know if it's if it's the pandemic or if it's age or i don't know what it is but i do in real life in real life where normally i would be like bing bing bing bing bing now i'll be like i'll just stare at that for i'll catch myself. Considering it, thinking about it. Sometimes it's relevant to what I'm looking at. Sometimes I'm thinking about other stuff, but just kind of. I would never in my hotel room on a show night after the show's over,

come back, strip off the clothes, and just kind of like. Hold for erection. Go ahead. And just kind of stare at that lamp for a second. I got to tell you, I've been doing that my whole life. You have? Yeah. It's new to me.

Somebody made... I remember somebody making fun of me like in 1995 about like... Or like this. My daughter does that the reason i like aziz ansari is because i met him with kroll in 2004 2005 and and kroll was like hey'm at brunch. Have you ever met that kid Aziz? And I look over and Aziz is like. I was like, I fucking, I know that look. I know. Yep. I've never met him, but I know that look intimately.

Yeah. I was thinking about it the other night with my daughter does that. And she's a little ADHD. So once in a while she just like like you know just kind of shuts off and she'll just be staring and i was thinking that's a great film idea of what discovering what that person is discovering what that person is thinking like because there is a mystery to it yeah disease is just staring like that some people are off put-put by it. Some people wondering what's he... Like in grade school, they'd be like, Brennan...

And why do you? Why do you think? Why do I do it? Yeah. It just happens. And why am I doing it now? I don't know, honestly. I mean, it could be...

Dave actually opened one of his specials, one of his recent ones of him just like and then Morgan Freeman does a voiceover about like and then they he showed the montage of what he's thinking and it's great it's like a great way to open a special but like it's like he goes into the stair it's like yeah but it's like that's what yeah I don't know you're just daydreaming not troubled by it by the way like yeah kind of like but noticing but it's weird that it just started yeah yeah i noticed it when i started going back on the road because i think that's when you're by yourself i guess yeah does it have to do with writing more do you think i don't know i don't know i mean maybe it's like it could just be like the spectrum like you're on the spectrum i don't i don't know no idea but i'm yeah i stare

at things yeah i've been there been there yeah like bit like from like a kid yeah death doesn't scare me yeah my wife told a story the other night that uh we were on a plane and it was like one of the engines went like it was like a loud metallic bang and someone yelling that something's on fire like the engines this happened this happened to us the plane lost its shit for a beat you know like all the people or the like we like one of those sudden drop things and then someone yells the engine's on fire and everybody blah blah and uh my wife said and they went over a pair of tits shaking yeah and my wife said was telling the story the other night and said all this went down and i'm like and people are screaming like yeah yeah there's some screaming

going on and my wife is grabs me you know because you would always look at me because i'm uh i fly all the time and uh and it was like oh my god are we going to die? And dad was just going, oh, I guess this is how it, I guess it's now. Yeah. What were you thinking as it happened? Didn't freak me out. Was like, oh, okay. All right.

I saw this coming. Yeah. All this flying. You knew it was going to catch up with me. Yeah. Ashton Kutcher, come on out. What I do think about women's access to fear meaning the ability to scream yeah or the that i i've done it once made that noise yeah and it was i was on ayahuasca and i thought there was a tiger in the room

and a tiger came around the altar and I went and I was like so that's how scared women are when you knock on the bathroom door when you're in the closet like there's a tiger in the room um and do you yeah well that's there's also something to be said for that's your temperament you don't strike me as like a very stressed out person and then it's just like and then it's time to die you're like yeah all right yeah and i also have a real i lost a lot of people when i was young so it was on my mind at an early age it wasn't like oh this is like i know people that are like death i've never thought of it totally yeah a hundred percent and

when it does happen they're like our whole world is crumbled and what the i mean you know still impacts me yeah to a great deal who died but i know it's coming who died uh i had uh my best friend when i was uh like a kid died in ninth grade of a moped accident then my one of my best friends in college died right when we graduated of a stroke and then giraldo died and you still eat the way you eat and i still eat the way and then giraldo died yeah who was yeah first comedy friend so i've had these three pillars of very very close friends yeah go and you still do a ton of drugs despite still still doing so much coke just wallowing in cocaine cocaine and yeah moped everywhere you go yeah but i i the first one was of course like the most like

oh this is what life well what's funny about death is like uh it doesn't it's like and then what did you deduce from it that this is temporary yeah yeah so fleeting if it could happen to him but i don't even think you even knowing someone died all the people you've had friends died which by the way at your age mine is not even that many um no but the closest right close yeah starting at 14 yeah i don't mean to minimize it like no no but i yeah but at this point but i still don't like you still don't even realize how fleeting it is like you still don't get a real sense you're no one's walking around appreciating any of this shit you know what i mean like no you know what i mean like or at least from my point i don't actually agree by that yeah you think people do you think you do have a sense of like i do that it's

precious great i do and how does it affect your behavior i'm very appreciative i am very much uh in the moment like really checking it all out yeah yeah great not bliss it's not constant like i'm making the best of this day uh-huh but i am like but the the windows are open and i'm checking it all out a hundred percent because i know i know and the kid i had that my friend dave who had the stroke he was my college friend and we were like that's the first time we were like really getting high and stuff and we would laugh about uh oh dude you know I'm gonna go I would be like oh online at the bank just standing there on a regular day and boom you hit the hit the floor and he would be like oh a hundred percent I'm gonna oh no I I'll

I'm gonna die of a stroke in three weeks yeah right yeah exactly we used to and and it was a very we were laughing and it happened to him which is crazy but uh but i always think well yeah that i could go from neil downstairs and your heart could pop like yeah like you don't know you really don't know and i guess it's i guess there is that realization but it's hard to to our earlier point it's hard to then make adjustments to your overall like it doesn't change the premise do you know what i mean like it doesn't change the premise of your life knowing that you you're not writing because like i any minute i could go or you're not doing stand-up because any minute i could go may that i'm aware but maybe you are

a little bit okay all right a little bit like there there is definitely, like, I don't like wasting time. But it's funny because it runs contrary to not being sincere because there's something incredibly sincere about it. Yes. But I don't need to share that with everybody at the dinner table. I mean, I do come from a people who were very appreciative of life. My grandparents were very much, my one grandmother had to see the sunset every night,

and my other grandmother had to have the family around. And it was not just the deaths, but it was a indoctrination. Is that the right word? I was taught to be grateful you know what i mean yeah it's not like my friend died when i was 14 and holy shit i've got to love every day i've been taught since day one you better love every day like this oh all right this is a miracle we're living in and then when the deaths do come, you realize there's confirmation that,

oh yeah, shit, Keith's not gonna- I thought this was a miracle. Keith doesn't get to go to my 15th birthday party. Yeah, I thought this was a miracle. Right, exactly. I'm also contradicting myself from other episodes because it's the first time I've actually appreciated life, but not from a death perspective per se it's more just like the the window of being alive yeah being an alive human being it's like a finite yeah yeah yeah like it's like

a hundred i looked up a hundred billion people have lived and died and like now it's our time if we're our we're our spot yeah we're doing our spot right now like yes and that's why i lack i mean i may lack sincerity but i don't but i'm not cynical i like how dare you just say this is all hopeless well what are you quitting on you're quitting on you and your experience and you're what you get today yeah and at the same time people it's we're a barge well that's the other thing is like i i don't think you believe any of this more or less than it's the it's it's all you know that thing of like uh i contain multitudes? Yeah. You know that line? Yeah.

The line before it is, do I contradict myself? Mm-hmm. He's basically going like, I don't fucking know. Yeah, right. I don't fucking believe. I also believe this. Yeah. It's not like I'm this incredible thing.

It's like, no, I'm constantly contradicting, and I'm a hypocrite, and I believe all of it and none of it. Yeah. That's why I love Whitman. I've never read any of it. You should. Okay. Because it is exactly what you're describing.

That kind of permeates all of the work. The insincere guy is telling us to read the most sincere poet of our day. But it is. It's like, it is. I am ugly. I am petty. I am cheap. I am a liar.

I am unhappy with myself. What a wonderful ride this is. Yeah. What an amazing thing. And I do appreciate the beauty but man am i kind of a shit face great it is it's great because if you have any sense that this is like like you said that window this is our time to like pop in here in whatever realm that means he celebrates all of that but then is bound by just the drudgery of being a human being yeah with his love handles hanging out well it's a fucking lot of upkeep it's just a lot

of it's a ton of cleaning and you gotta do you think you'll need everything in the cvs at one point in your life do you think at one point like you know you walk in and you grab the advil and you're like did you do that joke thank god i don't need i've written about it yeah and you're like thank god i don't need the bunion thing uh well no i i've no that's i i either i've tried the joke or it's like or i feel like fitzsimmons is coming to my head but it's like yeah you just work your way eventually down the aisle where it's like children's cough syrup yeah and then it's like the tights the compression socks the walker it really is all it's the circle of life the weird toilet seat that has an extra life an extra height you don't want to know what it is yet

yes i'll get there yeah like and like a second seat like who's the second part of it for what do you what am i gonna be doing um yeah you eventually it's just this yeah the humiliate just like i don't know yeah yeah yeah i gotta worry yeah yeah i gotta worry about that eventually i'm not to even look at the labels. And it becomes another thing of like, what are you doing, body? Where it's like, my, when you're younger, you're like, my body. And then eventually it's just like a different. Yeah.

You're like, oh. It's like a different quadrant. Now I'm looking for a skin tag removal. Yeah. Bought two different skin tag removal creams. I't know because they're like what no because i can't keep doing it because i don't remember it's not a big enough story yeah that it's they're also not anywhere visible or you get them removed or like i figure the derma will take it when i get there yeah but it it does become like a different you're the ceo of and like there's a factory and you're like i don't want to deal with the factory you're like can i skin tags yeah we can't see it anymore

johnson we can't see at night yeah exactly like we have bigger issues than skin tags it's like that much all right this is a big one and i don't know what it means and it is i see the future what does that mean tom papa i have glimpses of the future not in any great way that's useful but i do dream uh things that i and then see them in the day how often like pretty often pretty often i would say i don't know to put a number on it sometimes it happens like with frequency and sometimes it won't happen for a long time but a long time is probably like a couple months but like something stupid like i'll just be you'll see like a car go by or something. You'd be like, oh, that's so, that's bizarre. I think that's deja vu, right?

Bizarre. I think that's deja vu, right? That's the feeling that you've done this before. You know what I mean? You're saying you have like. I'm saying like, I'll dream about, I'll dream about, this is a bad example, but I'll dream about this is a bad example but I'll dream about um Marlon Brando for some reason that I'm talking with Marlon Brando and then I'll be in the conversation with somebody in a meeting and and they'll break out a Marlon Brando picture and be like this is the time I was with Marlon

Brando yeah like that kind of thing have you had a thing where like in your life where you're like i knew i was gonna be friends with jerry son or like i knew i was gonna be a comedian or i knew i was gonna be in movies or or yeah i mean i wanted that as a kid and that kind of stuff but i don't see that in the same category as i see the future like i wanted that you see trivia of the future i see trivia like for whatever dumb reason yeah this thing of asparagus was in i wake up thinking about it i have i think i have this also and then i go upstairs and my wife's like what happened with the asparagus yeah that kind of no i think i have this also and i never know what to make of it meaningless because it's like what is this it's i it's like if this

is proof of god or consciousness it's like would not be admissible in court no like it's not good and it's like you got to do better than this you just have it in your own this is barely better than a coincidence it happens all it's so small and stupid but also so impactful that I'll see it. I'll see the asparagus and go, oh, yeah, and never say it to one other person. Remember Louie used to do a joke? You ever see someone you don't know again? Like God's running out of extras in the movie of your life. Right.

He's like, go be a shopper. He's like, I was just a jogger. And he's like, fucking go be a shopper and he's like i was just a jogger and he's like fucking go be a shopper um yeah it's a very small thing but it is but it does it's trippy all right so we talked about changing the barge moving the barge how have you changed have you changed the barge and how did you do it have you improved or gotten more accepting of yourself or like increased your mood? What changes did you make in life that made you feel like there was less wrong with you? A big one was I was less selfish slash self-obsessed. You know, it's, you know, there's got got to be a slight i know this is such a trendy

pop psych thing that you know the use of narcissism but there has to be thanks for not saying gaslighting yeah but right like but there has to be there's definitely a healthy ego and self-obsession to be an entertainer to walk out in front of a bunch of people and be like i'm the one talking and also all of life is from my point of view. Right. This is for every human being on earth. Yeah. Before I had kids, I felt myself like it was getting a little unhealthy,

not just like the ego, like I can go do this, but just like worried about my own health or worried about, you know, I was a kid and being like, you know, what's that lump in my and like yeah i was thinking too much about me it was way too much about me and i realized quickly when we had our first kid in a new york apartment like this is this tactically can't be about me like it physically can't work you know what i mean like i'm like i'll still read the new york times in the morning right right i existence and it's like no like there's gonna be no you're not gonna have air all day and then just so out of practical terms it was just like started to adjust me and then i realized

it's not it must be nice to have kids because you don't have to be obsessed with self-improvement it is you're off the hook because you don't have to be obsessed with self-improvement. It is. You're off the hook because you're so concerned about this other person and your wife and this family. You had a great joke that you're just basically a nonprofit. Yeah, we're a horrible nonprofit organization. Yeah, fucking great joke. And then, you know, but I'm trying to say it wasn't like this noble pursuit

it kind of happened because it taught me to be less about me everyone says that yeah everyone says that about kids and it just

dawned on me the other day of like it's like a project where it's like you make a movie or you do a special or whatever

and you're like alright next one and you're the project and then you have a baby and you're like alright next one now we're. And you're the project and then you have a baby and you're like, all right, next one. Now we're just doing this one. Yeah, which is an interesting thing because there is a balance there though.

Like I've seen parents just, then it's all about the kids. Yeah. It's no longer about you and your girlfriend who started this relationship, who started this house together. Kids are before that yeah it's not oh the kid's schedule is going to work into our life yes no we're going to go to waco for a gymnastics tournament for three days yeah you know what i mean i've seen like for me i was very conscious that i'm not going to get absorbed by do you think

that's a cop out on their part? On the parents part? That people are like, well, we have to go to wait. Like, I don't have to. It's to your point. Like, you don't have to work on yourself. I don't even have to think about myself. I can just be obsessed with this.

I don't think like it's like it's Comic-Con or something. Yeah. I don't know if it's a cop out, but it's definitely something that I didn't want to participate in. Like, I wanted still. Well, that's the good thing about 70s parents. Yeah. I don't know if it's a cop out, but it's definitely something that I didn't want to participate in. Like I wanted still to. Well, that's the good thing about 70s parents. Yeah. Is you're like, what? Right.

Yes, I'm smoking near your crib. Right. What the fuck are you talking about? Yeah. Like you fit into adult world. Yeah. Right. Exactly.

You'll figure it out. Yeah. Which was very healthy. In a kind of perverse way. In a perverse, like, you know, this is life, get going. Yeah. Deal with, you got to, yeah. I mean, we're all, generations are trying to strike that balance.

But just on a personal level, I was like, I'm not going to stop caring about what I wear when I leave the house. Yeah. And just because I'm going to the soccer field. You know what I mean like i still i still wanted to i'm selfish enough to keep to tell me myself and yeah comb my hair brush my teeth yeah but in a deep level it's uh it definitely made me i guess it made me think about myself in a in a the right amount it was getting petty before I had kids toward other people towards myself like oh all right like petty concerns about me and oh petty like yeah my yeah all that kind of got it rigmarole all right now okay so I'm not gonna do

that but something to think about have kids yeah I know and I I wonder about it because I am conscious when I talk to you about it because, you know, we know each other and you're not doing it. And it's like you can find other things that it's almost like it was a. An easy way to kind of move the barge. Yeah, but it's also like accepting the barge. Just like, I don't know. It's pretty good. Yeah.

Anyway, what's your name? Yeah. All right. it we're gonna get you we're gonna feed you and you'll go to school um and and all right and then the uh and then final question what would the story what's the biopic story and who plays you what's the biopic story and who plays you? What's the biopic, story, and who plays me? Is it what I want it to be? What you want it to be and what it would be. What I would want it to be. Well, do you see life as a bunch of thwarted Tommy dreams? Like you had all these goals and do you see them as goal unmet goals no yeah because i don't think they they

you don't strike me as that no no um i was thinking the other night actually i had uh when i was a kid i had all of these like little kid heroic moments of uh sticking up for the little guy getting in a fight in high school and protecting someone turning in like a hundred dollar bill that i found when i was bussing tables at this shitty restaurant like i had all these very little tommy all-american yeah good kid moments and i was thinking it would be a fun it would be a fun story arc if then he just becomes like this regular guy and just those moments are just you know whatever he's an okay guy but he just kind of like humming along in his 30s and 40s in his 50s all of a sudden something presents itself that is a huge challenge yeah and he has to put him his life on the line in jeopardy forget everything all his goals all

his stuff to go tackle this thing yeah whatever that thing is i don't know change yeah climate change or guns or yeah something huge he's put in this moment and does and he finds that little heroic kid yeah that part of his nature is well what happened so you did have those moments and then you just kind of i don't know and then they just stopped presenting themselves or yeah you you found money and were like yeah there was a time there was a time when i was uh in the like from now on i keep it in the vons parking lot i don't know what happened but i was in the vons parking lot as a grown man with children and somebody had left a case of Coors Light on the under part of the of the shopping cart like where you return the carts and something in me just snapped like free beer

and I grabbed it like ran to my car with it I don't even like it I don't drink it I was just like I got something free I was still like lathering with my fine and I told my wife about and then it was and she's like and you just took it and I was still like lathering with my fine. And I told my wife about it. And then it was, and she's like, and you just took it. And I was like, yeah, yeah.

Right. Technically, I'll take it. I guess I took it. Yeah. But I think that that would be a cool, that would be a cool Tommy movie of like that little guy gets reway. I don't know what the big thing is at the end though.

Well, I mean, that's what city slickers was with Billy Crystal crystal played by john malkovich great fantastic same hairline yeah and he could do you what was your actual story yeah the actual story of my life is that i i became that little heroic little guy because i was read by these people who said be grateful about your life and be uh be thankful and grateful and enjoy this and I ended up in a position where I'm a stand-up comic who's not cynical yeah and I'm standing in front of a thousand people in a theater every weekend telling people the lessons I learned from those people you know what I mean yeah I'm encouraging and I do truly feel like I am spreading the word

of that that well that's what is the book about because that title kind of sounds like it yeah we're on this together to make room like so what is that that we that we are all literally in this together and you can learn from every single person that you ran into from every smart person dumb person anyone that you're aggravated by you can learn from them like i know i'm not going to die from uh bouncing off a trampoline into a ceiling fan because i've seen people do that you know i've watched documentaries about people dying uh rock climbing in nepal like going i'm i'm you can we're learn if you just open your eyes you're not the first person to walk into cvs with a problem so open your eyes and realize this has all been written before i know you're a snowflake So open your eyes and realize this has all been written before.

I know you're a snowflake in the uniqueness of you and we're all special. I get that. But you're really not that different from me. Yeah. We're not different from anybody. So don't let yourself off the hook. It's all been done before. Ask people for help.

Keep your eyes open in the CVS and you're going to realize you can get all the lessons that you need from life from everyone that's been here before. That's kind of what the book is. In a funny way. But, you know, but with jokes and stuff.

Yeah, with a bunch of jokes. They're comedic essays. Read by John Malcolm.