Bonanas for Bonanza - Bonanas For Bonanza Episode #37: “The Hopefuls”

Episode Date: July 17, 2024

Subscribe to The Andy Daly Podcast Project at Patreon.com/AndyDaly  Dalton, Mutt and Amy discuss season 2, episode 5, “The Hopefuls”, which is essentially season 1, episode 31, “Dark Star�� except it’s about Quakers instead of gypsies. Blood and fake beard glue are spilled in equal measure as Adam Cartwright must choose between being a man and loving a woman. Plus Amy lets the spirit move her in all sorts of unexpected directions and lets us in on her latest personal finance innovation.Featuring Andy Daly as Dalton Wilcox, Maria Bamford as Amy Sleeverson and Matt Gourley as Mutt TaylorMerch: redbubble.com/people/ADPodProject/shopMail: PO Box 9407 Glendale, CA 91226Email: [e-mail]’s website: andydaly.comRecord date: 10/5/2022 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

As women, our life stages come with unique risk factors, like high blood pressure developed during pregnancy, which can put us two times more at risk of heart disease or stroke. Know your risks. Visit Heart and Stroke. tooak. Academy Award winner, Helly Berry. One touch without a robot is all in takes.

Say it. Never let go. Never let go. We're the world now. Never let go. In the theater September 20th. You're about to listen to Bananas for Bananza episode 37. This is Andy Daly. Here on this free feed, I'll be re-releasing all of the back episodes of Bananas

for Bananza one every other week. If you want to hear new episodes, add free, please subscribe to my Patreon at Patreon.com slash Andy Daly. The entire Bananas for Bananza Archive is also waiting for you there, and you can access lots and lots of bonus content. So do that. Okay. Thank you.

Enjoy. Yeah! Oh, Namza. It's a finest show alive. So, consult your TV guide. Get your great outdoors inside. Take some ponderosa pride and forever made. Ride. Ride. Forever made, right! I'm bananas for bananas. Hey, yeah! Oh, damn.

Ha! Ha! Ha! Yeah! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!

Ha! You're going to give us a peep-peer-peer-peer-peer-peer-peer I don't like violence So those are blanks. Oh, okay. I always think that they sound to me like almost like a laser fire laser blanks. Yeah laser blax. Yeah laser blanks. Can you shoot a blank laser laser gun if you're a spaceman in the future? I guess like a laser pointer that you'd use to lecture with or put up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up to to to to to to the to the to to the to the the to the to to to the to the to to to to to to to to to to their p. their p. to their p. their p. their p. their p. their p. I their p. I their p. I their p. I their p. I their p. I their p. I their p. I their p. I their. their. I their. their. I their. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the the the the the the the the the the their. I's. I'm. I'm. I'm.e. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. th. I'm. I'm. future. I guess like a laser pointer that you'd use to lecture with or put up on screen in the 90s movie houses you know just to annoy people is kind of a laser blank because it doesn't burn. The 90s movie houses. Yeah you know in the 90s it was real popular to go into a Friday night movie and point a laser point at the screen. Oh I see what you're a

rich brisket of memories. That's true. You know what? I've been called that moat many times. A rich brisket of memories. Beautiful, right there in the slow cooker of your brain. Well my goodness, that's a good way to start off. Folks, hello friend. Hello friend, come on in. The gate is open wide.

Welcome to Bananas for Banza Boy, it's wonderful to be back doing one of these today we're going to be discussing season two of Bonanza episode five episode five episode five of season two oh boy this one is called the hopefuls man oh man wow I'm gonna treat the whole episode like a Quaker meeting and just be moved by the spirit yeah is that what they was was they quakers they truly said they they they they they they they they they they they they they they truly said truly said truly said they truly said truly said they they they truly said truly said the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thea thea. thea. trya. th tttrya. thea. thea. thea. their their their their their their their. Just speak. Is that what they was? Was they Quakers? They never was truly said, I don't believe. They were Quakers from Ohio, but Quakers are very vague. A lot of times, you can do whatever you want.

You just, they set a timer for 60 minutes, and then anybody can say anything they feel moved to say. And I've th just just th just just thus thus to just just just just just they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they to say anything anything anything anything anything anything anything anything anything anything anything anything anything anything anything anything. they they they they to say to say to say to say anything anything anything anything anything they they they they they they to say they they they to say they to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say to say. to to to to to to to to to to to their. to to to to their. to to to their to their to their their their their their their their their too. too. their. too. toldld. to to to moved to say and I've been to a meeting and usually it's the white guy who talks. Let me guess, he got a beard? He's got a beard and he's got a lot to say. He's moved by the spirit quite a bit. Yeah, Quakers are vague. Quakers ain't got the balls to be Amish.

Yeah, man, commit to it all the way. Get the damn buttons off your sweaters, rightsss, rights, right ss, their ss, to your ss, to your ss commit to it all the way. Yeah. Get them damn buttons off your sweater. Right. Or whatever. Yeah, he was very, this Quaker man was very upbeat about his daughter like, oh, well, women, you know, you can't control passions. And then he just let him be by themselves all the time. Yeah, he was a very progressive Quaker. He was a Stephen Wright joke. Oh, fantastic.

Do it. Oh, please. It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to paint it. The spirit moved you to say that. That's right. Oh my God. Wow. Can you imagine he's not kidding around trying to paint the whole damn world?

I mean, they wouldn't, they would wouldn't, they would that Quaker is where a lot of stand-up start. A lot of stand-up starts in a Quaker meeting because they set a timer for 60 minutes. Yes 60 minutes but you get however much time you want. So you could, if you're a stand-up comic Quaker, you could just say, well there's an audience here I'm going to use up the whole the whole, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th.. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. te. tea. tea. te. ta. te. ta. their, their, their, their, their, their, their,, well, there's an audience here, I'm going to use up the whole hour. You can't. You can't. No one will tell you to sit down because that's Quakers are nonviolent. But what if the spirit moves somebody to raise their hand and say, you know, shut up or whatever? Well, that is, that's against the religion. There's no, there's no heckling in Quaker, you know, I mean, I the passive heckle like a snore like a oh Now a sincere because you really did fall asleep snore or a kind of a I'm letting you know on board like a dramatic

A dramatic snore like a Like a Yeah, like a Yeah, so you know you're being messed with that. Yeah, yeah, nobody ever snored like that for real? Never did it happen. Hey, I didn't they they took. Never. Yeah, th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Bee, bee, bee, be, be, something like that. So you know you're being messed with, that ain't real. Nobody ever snored like that for real. Never. Never did it happen. Hey, I didn't mention it's a muttailers here. How do you?

And I'm Dawn Wilcox. We are your guides through episode five, season two of Bonanza, Hopefuls. This episode has everything. It's got a cart ride in love. Oh boy, does it? Maybe the most of Cartwright has ever been in love. I think so. He's passionately in love. He just, she's so weird and she disturbs him. That's what love feels like. Yes, that is the truly romantic thing he says to her by the water side. You disturb me very much. And then she says, you creep me out too. Yeah. And that's it, they are in love. There's a shootout, there is a woman, as we mentioned. There's tons of fake beards, and there's a lesson in being a man.

Man, I didn't write it down because I never thought I'd forget it, but I did forget it at some point, Hoss has a way of talking a to to talk........ a man's beard he says he's got a face full of something a face full of straw is that boy he's got a face full of straw hadn't he yeah or it was something slightly different than that face face like packed with straw or something like that yeah it was definitely it was a slur against a quakers yeah this is a crazy episode it's I tell you what it's almost exactly the same as the gypsy or Romani episode that we saw a few weeks ago holy shit that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th th that's that's th th th that's th th. th. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. It was was was was was was was was was was a th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was was a th. th. Yeah. Yeah. It was a th. It was a th. It was a th. It was a th. It was a th. It was a th. It was a th. It was a thi. It was a thi. It was a thi. It was a s. It was a s. It was a s. It was a s. It was a s. It was a th. It was a tell you what it's almost exactly the same as the gypsy or Romani episode that we saw a few weeks ago Holy shit, that's right. Just swap in Quakers for the other group and then that's all you need to do.

Yeah. But man in that regard it's wonderful. I'm so glad to have another look at that episode with some different costumes. So now I'll talk a little bit about the original air date of this episode, but there ain't much to say. It came out this one on October the 8th of 1960. There's barely anything going on. I mean, it's the same goddamn number one movie, Ben Her, that it's been all fucking

year long. What about the several social movements that were occurring simultaneously. In 1960? Not a huge crossover with the Bonanza audience. I didn't notice any in my research. There's the number one country song was still Alabama by Cowboy Copas. The number one Billboard song was still my heart has a mind of its own by Connie Francis.

Well, I had a damned hard time finding a celebrity birthday somebody that was born on October 8th 1960. I got I got two but I don't love either one of them. One of them is Indonesian actor and politician Ron O'Carno. He's he did he's an actor and then he became a politician and he did both at the same time. You know how Schwarzenegger said I'm won't be your action hero. But then th th th th th th then then then then then then then then th then then th th then th th th th th in th in thin thin thin' thin' thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi they they they they they they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. the they. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. I's is thi. I's is thi thi the is the is the is the. I too. I tooe. I tooe. I tooe. I tooe. I the. I thooo. I th governor but I won't be your action hero. Right. But then this fella says I can do both at the same time. No kidding. Yep. And then there's Reed Hastings. You ever hear of that fella? Sounds familiar. He's the founder of Netflix. Oh that's not who I thought. Yeah. Wow. Heastings. Read Hastings. Can you guess when Netflix was founded? I I I I I I I I I I I I the Netflix was f f f f f f f f f f. I I the th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. th. the. th. the. the. the. th. th. th. the. th. th. founded? I was surprised. I'm going to say

1994. Okay, that's your guess. I'll say 1998. Boy, you guys, we're both real close. I would have said 2012, but it's 1997. That was when they made it. Wow, yeah. And he was mailing DVDs to people. Yeah. Remember that? Yeah. He's the first guy to say, hey I could put these in the made it. He was mailing DVDs to people. Yeah. Remember that? Yeah. He's the first guy to say, hey, I could put these in the goddamn mail. DVDs had hardly been out. Oh yeah, 1997, that's right. I sound like Gallagher right then. What happened to that? He die? No, he's live and well. I think his brother died, the one that was doing the third-party Gallagher shows. Oh okay. Gallagher 2 is good. I could be wrong. I can tell you I did read an article because it was two the night before this old what's their names John F. Kennedy and Richard M. House, Nixon. They had their second debate. Speaking of Quakers. Is he a Quaker? Sure is. Holy s-Hissue. That's that's why he the the the the the that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's I that's I that's I that's I that's I that's I that's I I I that's I I I I that's I I I I I I I I I I I that's. I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I. I I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the the the the the the the the the the their. I th. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I could. I'm. I could. I could. th. I could. I could. th. I could. I could. I could. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. Neal House, Nixon. They had their second debate.

Speaking of Quakers. Is he a Quaker? Sure is. Holy shit. That's why he was raised in Whittier, the Quaker town. You're kidding me. No, Goddame, I didn't know that. No, damn.

You remember, they always talked know that. Sure. I have not seen that one. Is there a gift I could watch? Oh I'm sure there's a gift. Yeah, why waste time? That's the thing. They said that Kennedy, if you listened on the radio, Nixon won. But if you watched it on a gift, Kennedy won. Right. That's what they always said at the time. Well, here's something I never heard this before. This was in the papers on October. Nix. Nix. N. If. If. If. If. If. If. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. I. It's, th. It's, th. th. th. th. the th. th. the the th. th. It's, the, the the the the the th. th. the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the gift. the gift. the gift. the gift. the gift. the gift. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I, th. I was th. I was th. I was th. It was th. I was th. I was, th. I was, th. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was, the. I was. I was, the papers on October the 8th, where they said that this time, because Richard Nixon said, I am not going to be a big sweaty mess this time, goddemnit. And so he demanded that the temperature be set to 64 degrees. That's real cold. And John F. Kennedy came in and said, it's too to up to 72. Now, they could have compromised somewhere in the middle.

72's a little warm for a door. 72's a little warm under the lights. It's too hot. Yep. But he knew what he was doing. Who did? Kennedy. Kennedy.

He knew what he was. This fella does. Also on October the 8th, 1960, Buck,ens made his first appearance at the Grand Old Aubrey. Oh, good old Buck, I used to know him. Yeah, you did. Oh, I came up under Buck Owens and the Bakerfield Sound. He's a real hero to me. Oh, that nice to hear. And he was on the-

I'm a- I'm a-Grinning. Gloom, despair and agony on me. Dark depression, excessive misery. If it weren't for bad luck it had no luck at all. Gloom, despairing it. They're gonna put me into movies. Yeah, he did that one. He also did, that was beautiful by the way. It was beautiful.

I'm gonna put it on band camp. Oh, it's CD, baby. Oh, good. I'm gonna look for it there. He also, did you know that he had a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to to to to to to to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, despair, despair, despair, despair, despair, despair, despair, despair, despair, despair, despair, despair, despair, despair, despair, a, a, despair, a, a, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, a to, to, to, to, to, to, to-a, to-a, to-a, to-s.. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-a, to-a, to-a, we'll look for it there. He also, did you know that he had a rock and roll song called Hot Dog. Play a little of that, would you, Britt? Hot dog, but he didn't want it to ruin his country career, so he recorded it under the name Corky Jones. Wow, that's more country than Buck O'Ns. I'm going to be Buck O'ins, that's a country star, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I th, and I than Buck Owens. That's true. He says, I'm going to be Buck Owens and a country star, and I don't want nobody calling

out from the audience, play hot dog! Wow. Corky Jones, he's the riverboat rocker. Oh, is that? Yeah. Well, I don't know. It sounds more like some an aunt that you'd have on a boat. Oh, yeah. that that opes. You want a guy named corky on your boat. I'll tell you that right now. He should have been a lifeguard. On October 8th 1960 Roy Orbison played a concert at a roller skating rink. So as I'm saying it, well just wasn't much going on.

What do you mean? This is elite stuff you got here. The M&S Skaterway they called it up there somewhere in Northern California. Yeah, well, I don't know. What else? You say there were social movements going on in 1960? Well, yes, there was equal rights going on for all people, and then the women's rights movement and then there was the Environmental Protection Agency there was chit chatting about that. You know who started that environmental protection agency? Who did? Richard Milhouse, Nixon and Quaker. That's right. Oh, he did.

Oh, and that's a part of the great Quaker thing is taking care of the world. Yeah, that's right. Okay, well anyway I didn't notice any of that in my research. So, so, so, so, so th. Oh, so th. Oh, so th. Oh, th. Oh, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the the thi, thi, thi, thi, th care of the world. Yeah, that's right. That's right. Okay, well, anyway, I didn't notice any of that in the research. So we're, too bad. But that's, that's the air date, the original air date of October 8, 1960. That's, the country was set in concrete. They weren't budging on Ben-Hur, or Alabama, or my heart has a mind of its own, they just said, everything was fine last week, let's just keep the same this way. No, no spoilers. Yeah. But do you know how long this will go on?

Ben Hurd? All of it, all three. Uh, I think, I think there's the most change on the billboard chart. I think, in fact, next week, there'll be a different kind of friends a song a different song okay great I'm moved by the spirit to tell another Stephen right true oh boy fantastic that's fantastic I'm gonna get a tattoo over my whole body of me but taller oh my god it can't be done that fucking idiot it can't be done well that's that's where you the switch the switch that's where your brain you turn it around and go that the you, the switch, that's where your brain, you turn it around and go, that

the confusion, because they, oh, I'm not explaining it right. No, but I'm saying he is the height that he is. You can't tattoo skin that doesn't exist, a fucking idiot. That's true! No, he's right. If he did this, he'd run out of room, he'd have a nose on his forehead because because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. tho, tho, tho, tho, their, they's, tho, that's, tho, tho, they, they, they, they, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, I I I I, I, I, I is, I is, I is, I's, I's, I's, I's, they... He's is, they. He's is they. they. they. tho, thoooooooooooooooooomoomorrow, that's, that's, that's, that's tho, tho, they. No. they. on his forehead because the tattoo is supposed to be taller and then you'd never see his eyes. Yeah and I'm I'd say get down I'm Gallagher. This guy Stephen Wright, she's gonna call him Stephen Wrong. He's fucking moron. That's the best Stephen Wright joke I ever heard. There you go. Get right, get down. Talk about painting the whole world. They never did make enough paint to cover the entire planet. Don't get stuck in bummer to bummer traffic. Now Gallagher, that was a comedian. He says,

don't listen to my words. Look at my watermelon. That was the way to do it. He wore dance pants. I also, as a result of this episode episode I have a personal finance company where we help you manage your wealth and so let's say you have a lifetime of savings due to 50 to 60 years of hard work such as like the Quakers doing this episode and so I take all the cash and I put it in a van and I just keep driving it cross country back and forth and back and forth and no one can find me. Do you tell everybody that you run into about the money in your van? I'll kind of, well on the side of the van, all sides of the van it says cash cow.

Says the cash cow. And then you know when you need me to put more money in it I put I put it out to pastor and then you can add whatever you want to the back. Is there how do you earn money on your investment are you earning an interest rate or how does that work? Well you're earning in miles. Oh I on the points that I drive with your money that adds up. But now I understand that for airline miles. I've never heard of this isn't the way miles work? It adds up and you earn you get to have different levels so you're if I go 2,000 miles with your 50,000 dollars with your $50,000

in the back of my Dodge Caravan, then that means you're titanium. If you, if I'm drive maybe back and forth from Chihuahua, Mexico, maybe one time for two Los Angeles, and that's maybe another 1,500 miles then you're actually you're still in titanium but let's say you weren't and let's see you went to the next level which is wood. Wood comes after titanium. Yes. Interesting. Are there perks for being a wood member of the... Well, you will be announced. I announce it. I'll give you a call and I say

you're now wood. And then if you want, you know I can talk to you for a while. Okay. That'd be nice. And I always speak to you like I will say to you, your name and I say your name wood member, valued wood member, your name valued wood member. Thank you for being a valued wood member. That's great. And by the time I make it to wood, my 50,000 dollars is wood by that point. It's still 50,000 dollars, but where it's been? More importantly, where is it right? It's been everywhere.

But where is it right when he needs it? Well, you just, you can follow it. I have a GPS and we do find my iPhone, and we connect each other, find my friends? But if he needs that money and you're in Sarasota Florida and he's in Pasadena at the Pier 1 steak house, how soon can he get it? Well, I think that's the great part. It's also a real good savings program and emergency fund so that is it an emergency? You go through the three questions. I see. Can I walk? Can I talk? Do I have friends? Do I have friends if the question is? Is it? Is it? Is it? the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. they. their the. I. tho. I. their. their. their. their. their. their. their their their their. their. theirtalk? Do I have friends? If the question... And if the answer to that is all three, then you are not in an emergency? You are not an emergency. Yeah. But what if it isn't? Yes, isn't the answer? Well, then I'll get on my way and I'll let you know what my time frame is. Can you do the share ETA from the MAPS app? Yes. That would be good? Yes. Well. I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the answer. I the answer. I the answer the answer the answer the answer the answer the the the the answer the answer the answer the the answer the answer the answer the answer the answer the answer the answer the answer the the answer the the the answer the the the answer the the the the the the the answer the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the answer. I I I I I I I I? I? I? I the answer. I? I the the the the the th. I? I? I'll? I'll th. I'll th. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll the th. I'll the th. I'll get. I'll get. from the maps app? Yes. That would be good. Yes. We're still talking four to five days cross-country. But that's what you need

to really think about it. Can you pawn anything? And I'll ask you more questions. Okay. So before you I get the cash out of the back I ask you 12 more questions. Jesus. Why can you pawn anything? Do you have any skills? Let's write 50 ways you can earn right now? Three, let me see. And you might offer some of these folks a job right there on the spot and your multi-level marketing. That's right. You know, if I still have something I need delivered or, oh, you have a car well excuse me Queen Elizabeth I don't think you need this 50 grand right now you've got a car you can sell that you can you can you can crash it into something and make the insurance

pay a top dollar why should I drive all the way across the country to give you your money out of a van when you've got a perfectly good car you can sell for what I see. And I make you really think before diving into your emergency front because that's the thing you know people say oh I've got a I got a flat tire or oh I got this big bill because my leg was broken it's like well that's that's nothing you know what you save it for a real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. I they. I they. I they. I their. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tod today. I today. I today. I tip. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I today. I today. I today. I the the the the the the like, well, that's nothing. You know, what you, save it for a real rainy day. Yeah, I love this idea because you know what, I did, I've got some money in a bank,

but I don't know literally exactly where it is. You know what I mean? Where are those bills right now? I don't have any idea. With me, you can pinpoint the coordinates of where I am at and I'll actually you know you can follow me on Instagram which is cash cow and and and I'll take a picture where I'm at you know even if it's somewhere embarrassing. Like where? The pooper? I won't I will wait a second to get everything finished up.

Yeah, but you might say I pulled over to use the pooper and here's a picture of the cash cow van over here by these port of jobs. Unmanned while I'm here in the fooper. Come on down. No, I that van is very secure. I have a, um, uh, one of the bars on the van. Oh a club? A club? I have a a club on the steering wheel? I have a club in the steering wheel. I haven't seen one of those in a while. Yeah, and I don't know that the steering wheel's the problem. Right around the time that Netflix was founded, everybody had a club on their steering wheel. I haven't seen one in a while. I guess people stop stealing cars. Because they got deterred by the club.

It's like a polio vaccine. I thought it was because maybe they're getting their DVDs at home. They don't need to go stealing a car. Well, okay, that's a great business. You want to hear some fun facts about guy, here's an interesting thing. Get ready for this. It's gonna blow your mind. There's a character in this episode named a Shen Doa. They call him Shen. And he's the major bad guy, the bad guy. The bad guy. Yeah, yeah. He, spoilers, gets shot and dies on in the, you know, out in the wilderness. Now, the fellow that wrote, this is the only episode of banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana. the the the thapapapapapapapapape ban ban ban ban ban ban ban ban ban ban ban ban ban ban ban ban. the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th wrote this episode, this is the only episode of Bonanza he ever wrote, named the E. Jack Newman, he wrote, he went on to create a show called A Man Called a Man Called Shenandoah. And the premise is, a man shot and left for dead on the trail is found

and revived. He has no recollection of his past and calling himself Shenandoah, roams the west in search of his identity. What I'm saying is this episode of Bonanza was the pilot episode for the show that became a man called Shenandoah. It has to be. Wow. Or at the very least, this guy just loves the name Shenandoah for the character. And it was the same actor that played him or not? No, so that guy must have been mad.

Think about that. Yeah. He was good, wasn't he?. He was, the same, the same, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to, to to to to too. Oh, too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. Oh, to, to, to, to, to, to. Oh. Wow. The guy that played Shenandoah. He was good, wasn't he? Yeah. Yeah. He didn't have much of a career after that. He didn't, I thought I recognized him. I thought, so too. His name was Charles Maxwell. He played Shenandoah. This is his second of ten Bonanza episodes as ten different characters. We already saw him in episode three. He was a character named Krooge. That's probably where I recognized. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's a the that's. the hehe he he he he he he was. the he he was. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's a th. He's. He's a th. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's, he's. He's. He's, I was. He's, he's, he's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He's. He's. He's. He's a th. He's a th. He was was was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was was was th. He was was th. He was was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was. you go. His longest running role was the unseen and uncredited radio announcer on numerous episodes of Gilligan's Island. Radio announcer. Yeah you know they had a radio I think you the little white motorcycle plastic transistor yeah power up the radio and then a guy

would come on and say rock band the mosquitoes is missing. Whatever. Now here's a fun one. The Philip that plays Jacob the Baden Quaker, is an actor by the name of Larry Gates. And I was looking him up, looking all up and down about his career, and he said that he was in a production of Hamlet opposite Sam Waters. You know Sam Waters. But I says to myself, I can't picture Sam Watersden to Hamlet. Well, let me Google, let me find out more about this production.

Come to find the New York Times review of this production of Hamlet. And this fellow, Larry Gates, our Jacob, played Polonius. And I'm reading the whole review, and it's a mixed review, but it says a little something about each cast member I says myself oh my goodness it's gonna say something about Larry Gates who played Polonius as I'm reading that and I'm putting myself in the mindset of imagine I'm Larry Gates that was his name is Larry Gates and I'm now this is it the New York Times has reviewed my performance is Polonius and Hamlet what are they going to say about them well well here's a quote here the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their is their is their is their is their. I I I I I I I I I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their. the their to say about me? Well, here's a quote. It says,

Watching Larry Gates's Polonius, I was always aware of the actor's physical resemblance to Hubert H. Humphrey. And that's it. That's all he gets. That's a New York Times reviewer. Wow. Man, oh man. He must have just thought, I don't know.

What would you think if you read that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's, the, the, the, the, the, the, he must have just thought, I don't know, what would you think if you read that in the New York Times? That's a net gain of zero. Yeah, you're not worse off and you're not better off. When he was, yeah, if he was dressed, Hoover, was he, he was the man who he dressed like a lady sometimes? Who did? Jedger Hoover.

Oh, Hubertie. I'm so sorry. I believe who's he. He was a failed presidential. I believe so. Now, the only way this could have helped Blair Gates is if they was cast in a Hubert H. Humphrey biopic at the time. Oh, right. Then it would have been a real boon. Here, what I've done did is I got pictures. You can look at them side by side. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the the the the the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I got th. I got th. I got th. I got th. I got th. I got th. I got th. I got th. I got th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the the the. the the the only only only only only the. the. the. the. the. th. th. them side by side. I did my best to find pictures of the gentleman that were comparable, but I don't really see it quite frankly. You see it resemblance between Huberlach, Humphrey? Well, they both have a bald pate. Uh-huh. Bald pate.

I mean, yeah, I guess, but not enough to railroad a theatrical review in the New York Times for her. a theatrical review in the New York Times for. It's enough to call them both Jeff by accident. They do both look like Jeff. Now if that was in the New York Times, I'd buy it. Yeah. Watching Larry Gates's Polonius, I accidentally refer to him as Jeff like I often do with Hubert Humphrey. That went a better review. Well, I have something

moved by the spirit to tell you. Here we go. It's something from the Bible. Okay. The wicked borrow and do not repay but the righteous gift generously. Psalm 3721. Wow, that's a real fire. That's not a joke. No, that's very relevant -on brimster. That's not a joke. No, that's very relevant to this episode. Yeah, that's right. Yep, so far, if you're keeping scored, the Bible gets it right, Stephen Wright gets it wrong. Read the Bible instead of that joker.

Patricia Donahue played Regina Dairy in this, the woman. She also is in the fastest guitar alive. That's that that that that that thia thia thia thia thia thia thine thine thine thine thine thine thine the woman. She also is in the fastest guitar alive. That's that Roy Orbison movie where he's got a guitar that's a machine gun. She's in a movie called A Boy 10 Feet Tall. I don't know why. Okay it must have been Stephen Wright's tattoo. Right. She's also, now here this was a bit of a rabbit hole. I don't know if you ever heard this story. She's married to a big band leader in saxophonist named Sam Donahue. Sam Donahue was the band leader of the back and band for Frank Sinatra Jr. Frank Sinatra Jr. and he's torn around front in the band.

He's in Lake Tahoe of all places at a casino, and he gets kidnapped. and the kidnapnapnapnapnapnap th th th th you th you th you th you ever ever th you ever you ever you ever you ever you ever you ever you ever you ever you ever you ever you ever you ever you ever you ever you to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the their the the the the the the the the the the the their to to to their their their And the kidnappers called Frank Sinatra Sr. and they said, if you ever want to see your boy alive, you'll do just what we say. And this was what it said on Wikipedia. He was kidnapped. He was released two days later after his father paid the $240,000 ransom demanded by the kidnappers. Sinatra had offered $1 million, but the kidnappers inexplicably declined the larger offer. Wait a minute. So they called and said, if you ever want to

see your son again, you'll do just a week, he said, fine, I'll do whatever you say. I'll give you a million dollars. And they said, we was thinking 240,000. Well, that's the thing. If you have a spending plan and you have an income business statement where what you, you know, you already have things allocated. If you get it a different number, it changes everything. So they'd have to go back and they'd have to redo all their spreadsheets? Oh, no. Now we got, we got an extra $500,000 to allocate, and that means we're going to have to go back through our, yeah, our, and they did not have Excel back then,

where all the things are just done for you. Maybe 240,000's all that could fit in a cash cow van. Yeah, it's a van savings and then, you know, that kind of, I do everything on a cash basis and also, you know, again, the question answer, financial management, you know, is there anything else you can do for money? Do you have blood? Do you have... The answer to that, I would imagine is a hundred percent.

Is your hair long enough for someone to be interested? Oh, could you kidnap Frank? And they didn't do them any harm and they didn't take more than they asked for which shows a real restraint? Yeah, they had principles. I'm questioning though why they didn't name a price in the beginning and Sinatra was just had to open the negotiations? That's usually a little backwards. Oh yeah, I think that's Sinatra being an amateur in having a kidnapped son. But luck and little did he know he was dealing with the the the the the the the the the they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they didn't they didn't they didn't they didn't they didn't they didn't they didn't they didn't they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they didn't they didn't to to to to took took to took took took took took to took took to took took they didn't they didn't they didn't they didn't they didn't yeah, I think that Sinatra being an amateur and having a kidnapped son. But luck little did he know he's dealing with bigger amateurs

who would lowball themselves by two, three quarters. He looked out. Well, I think he's made, Sinatra's made it clear so many times that he does things his way. We want 240,000. No way, baby. I'm giving you a million million million're gonna like it. I did it my way. They did end up catching those kidnappers and now I went to jail. I'll tell you that. Oh well. Did they ever say it and they never said why and 240 such an

odd amount why not 250? Uh yeah good question they must have had some logic but it's lost a time. Well the here's one one that Sam bored he was a the th. he was th. th. the th. the th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. th. th. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. the. th. th. some logic, but it's lost to time. Well, here's another one. Sam Bord, he was not the ultimate bad guy, really. I recognize this guy for sure. I know I do. Well, okay. Do you ever watch Dallas?

Yeah. All right. He played the character of Vaughn Leland on Dallas. He was the prime suspect in the who shot JR thing. Really? Oh, but it didn't end up being him to shot JR. He also, this is what it says in his biography, he was television's first vampire in a 1950 episode of stage 13. Oh no.

Now it does not specify whether they're saying that he was the first actor to portray a vampire. Right. there saying that he was the first actor to portray a vampire on television or whether he was the first goddamn vampire to step in front of a goddamn television camera. Right. I think they mean he was a vampire. Yeah, I think they do too. So I looked up what did he die? How did he die?

And the answer is that he died supposedly in a house fire and every article about this specifies that his poodle Josh was by his side and the two of them died when the house caught on fire but what better way to fake your death and what if that dog was serabus oh right not Josh yeah if you got a if you got a serabus what better idea give him a name like Josh Yeah, and tell people he's hypo-allogenic. That's one step away from being a Jeff and you just You hide among in plain sight. Wait a minute now what else was this fella in? I know I know I know him from something. Well movies do he do any movies? I'm sure he did but not that I wrote down. It's probably? He looked familiar to you. Well. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they?? they? they? they? I? the he? he? he. I he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. I. I. I. I. the. I. t. t. t. I. I. t. t. I. ttte. I. te. te. te. I. te. I. te. He. I. t. He. He. t. He. it's probably that don't worry about he looked familiar to you well look him up because yeah that mostly I read about this vampire thing and that's all I wanted to know the good thing I mean the room these these job listings that you you list is that these people were willing to

do absolutely anything for money and that's what I try to tell my clients is before spending the 50 grand that you th you th you th you th you th you th th th th to to to to th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. tho. they they they thoe thi the. they they they tho. tho. they tho. they've to to to they've to to they've to to they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they th I I I th I th I th I the the the to to the to to to theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee only to to thy the the I try to tell my clients is before spending the 50 grand that you have in my van you've got to humble yourself humble yourself how low is there any low that's too low I've I've said have you asked if your friends need their toilets cleaned and and they say no and I say well I think there's some I don't think this is a real emergency and and they say well but you know we don't have a place to live and I say but and usually once I I just keep talking yeah and they get the hint I she ain't bringing me my money anytime soon I'm on my own. I don't have enough money to. Yeah, and they get the hint. She ain't bringing me my money any time soon.

I'm on my own. I don't have enough money to continue this phone call, God damn it. Well, and it's a type of interest that you lose interest if you keep talking to me. I'm losing interest in this conversation. Not necessarily in my money, because that was never part of the deal. But I looked this fella up. Okay. He's been on an episode of The Hulk. Are you aware of that? I was not aware of that. Yeah, called the Antowook Horror. The Antowalk Horror. Well, we're going to have to check that out.

Yeah. What is I'm going to say? How much can you charge to clean your friend's toilet, do you think? Well, I say what the market will bear. So if you tell your friend, you'll bring the emotional depth behind the words of, you know, the number that you're saying. So you say, I say, to my friend, Amy, who's me? I say Amy, I need a job And I would be willing. I am now in this moment willing to clean your toilet for $75 an hour. Well, wow one toilet gets clean for $75 an hour $75 an hour and then you go you bargain from there and then they say if you get down to whatever the amount is. to you? to the amount is, you? to the to to to the? to? to? the the the to? the the the the to? the the the the the to to the the to to to the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the toa. toa. toe. toe. toe. to hour and then you go you bargain from there and then they say if you get down to whatever the amount is even if it's half a power bar and some milk then you say that's a good meal right there that's not bad you say yes and you say I am willing to earn or burn well I'll tell I'd rather have my toilet clean by a friend than a strain. That's right who else to see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see see the stuff. See the stuff. See the stuff. See the stuff. You see the stuff. You see the stuff. You see the stuff. You see the stuff. You see the stuff. You say the stuff. You say they. You their the the the the th you get th you get th. If you get th. If you say if you say if you say if you say if you say if you say, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. You get you get th. You get thi thi the the the the the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. You I'd tell you I'd rather have my toilet clean by a friend than a strange thing. That's right who else to see see the stuff that you leave under the the you know. Yeah the lip of the bowl. Oh my gosh the stuff people leave that you don't know it you don't know that you're so filthy. Calcified urine. Well let's do it. That was a real good one man oh man it was. that that that that that that you. that you. that you that you that you that that you that you that that that that that that that that that that that the that the that that the the to see. the the to see. the the the the to see th to see to see. See. See. See to see to see to see to see to see see see see see see see see see to see to see to see see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see that you see that you see that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you th. th. the th. the the the the the the the the the the the th. the the th. th. the the. the. the. the. the. this episode, you know what? Let's do.

That was a real good one, man, oh man, it was good. I think we've got more than enough time. Academy Award winner, Helly Berry. One touch without a robot is all in text. Say it. Never let go. We're the world now. Never let go. Never let go. We're the world now. Never let go. In the theater September 20th. Let's see here. Well, it starts with Adam riding through Virginia City and then a bunch of Quakers ride

in and they just come here to water their animals is what they done. Was the middle man in the poncho in this episode? No. Didn't see. They didn't do the establishing the that I saw, anyways. They just had the thoughtful man saying his words slowly as if that's a part of Quakerism as well. Talk slow, and have unfocused gaze. They also used thee, sometimes when I I think they should have been using like thou and thy and thine. They threw them around like wild, be thou thy. It was arbitrary.

They come all the way from Ohio, yes they did. And man it is love at first sat between Adam and Regina. They just look at one another and they're equally enchanted. Yes. Just smitten. Then what else here? She's wearing the blonde wig of the Hissidim. She's beautiful. Then Adam has to go into the saloon to do some business and there's a gambling dispute going on in there. And Adam saves a gambler's life by pulling a gun just at the right time,

disarming a game, cheating gambler who's got a derringer on them. And that's how he comes to meet Sam. It was Sam's life that he saved. And Sam, Sam, from that point, they're attached to the hip. And Sam says, I'm gonna, and look, I don't like O-in-you my life, but I'll come with you and I'll ride with you a a a a a piece with you a piece a piece a piece a piece friends. Even though there's a little something where Adam's sort of like,

I think, I know you from somewhere. Yeah. And here's the, I move to speak from Proverbs. The borrower is slave to the lender. That's it, isn't it? Sam understands that. He says, I don't want to owe you anything. You save my life, and that makes me uncomfortable. He don't like it. Well, and then that's all we learn.

Then we see this is the 37th episode of Bonanza to feature the burning map. Did you remember it? No, I didn't. It's right there. Yep. And then we get, okay, I want to play this scene I see if you can the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, and see, th, th, and see, the, and see, and see, and see, the, and see, and see, and see, thi, and see if thee, thee, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, and see, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th..... thee, thee, thee, thee, thee, thee, thee, thee, thee, thee, thee, thee, thee, thee, the, the, the, th love a this is wrong with this picture a couple of jerks Drunken jerks are Given a hard time to Jacob now Yeah, right you remember this scene? Let's see if you can spot a little something went wrong in the shooting of this scene. Let's see if you can find it

I'm gonna turn it up even all the louder for the benefit of the microphone We are weary we must find a campsite and rest for the night. Camp right here. Sure, you can have a prayer meeting tonight. We'll get whooplast style and our gals to come and join in. I know thou art seeking amusement, but please allow us to pass. How do we know you ain't desperate characters? Did you notice it? No, give it again. Okay.

I didn't notice anything. It's looking for something wrong. You're looking for something wrong. Like pure gospel. Oh, no. Now, I'm so curious. I can't. I'm excited now.

You guys couldn't spot it. that's exciting. Is my computer fast enough to see it again? Is there a a a the... Nope, it's even sillier. I have not to. I have an idea. You have an idea. Yeah.

Okay. Well, we'll cut this out. Oh, look what's happening. I wonder if I need to refresh the page and go through all kinds of... Oh, just tell us. Oh, just the problem was. That's funny you didn't spot it. Do it. But yeah, I've had this problem before.

I can't replay clip. It's funny though, because there's a couple of interchangeable fellas. Do you notice that Sam and Shannon Doe's henchmen were kind of wearing matching uniforms, matching costume? Those guys I've never laid my eyes on for one second. My eyes did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did not did second my eyes did not fall on them in. That's beautiful and that's a real lesson is that we can all be replaced. Yeah that's true. Here we go all right I'm gonna try and show this to you. Now I know you don't want to see it

anymore. I do. Okay let's switch places. Come on now. Oh I have to ask it to go. Oh that's it to go. Oh, that's a whole different episode. It switched episodes on you. Wow, there's a real switching, switch and tell. God damn it, all right. We'll get there. I have, I moved by the spirit to Stella, Stephen Wright.

Oh, God, damn it. I almost broke both my arms trying to Stella Stephen Wright Joe. Oh God, damn. I love this. All right. I almost broke both my arms trying to hold open a revolving door for a woman. Isn't that? I mean, women are so bad. They don't need to hold open a goddamn revolving door, you idiot. If you want to hold a door open for somebody, they always have a door to decide the revolving door. That, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, tho, tho, the tho, tho, the tho, the tho, the the the the the the the the the the the tho, the tho, tho, tho, tho, th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, thin, thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, the tha, for somebody they always have a door to decide of the revolving door that ain't a revolving door

do that one I thought it was more like women are a burden and how funny that is that's for sure that we have these rituals and you know dances of us being polite and they wouldn't exist if women weren't here. Yep, I guess that's true too. I got a question. All right. Why is it you drive in a parkway but you park in the driveway? Oh, why do you drive on a parkway?

We should sit in silence just to take in the wisdom. Park in a driveway. Get down. Think about it. It's the parkway that I have a problem with. It don't make no sense. That damn, let's see that watermelon. All right, here we go.

We're gonna watch it, see you the second time. Start a little ear. We are weary. We must find a campsite and rest for the night. Camp right here. Sure, you can have a prayer meeting tonight. We'll get hoopla style and her gals to come and join in. I know thou art seeking amusement, but please allow us to pass. How do we know you ain't desperate characters?

My friends, I issue. I mean, obviously they did do theytakes, but I do like to think when they cut for the other guy's coverage, not cut, but the other guy's saying his line, they did do a quick. They just did a little swap-a-room. A little chance. Yeah, that's what I like to think too. their the story.

Okay, all right, well good for you. You gotta keep your eyes on their hats. They've got two different color hats. It's a real shell game. Yeah, that's what it was. Well, okay, so what are we learning? Man, they spent a lot on beard glue in this episode. Yeah.

Okay, well, out they go. They're moving out. What you got, the whole wagon trains going west, and Adam is coming along, and so is Sam bored, his new buddy that he saved a life of, and off they go. And why is Adam joining? Just to be helpful, but really, because he's in love with Regina. Yes, he knows she's men and I tight. He's following the scent of a woman.

Right, yeah, just like Peppy LaPue. But they got a, they also understand that these people don't have guns. Oh, he and Sam talk about that. They don't have guns, they don't believe in violence. But they've been doing fine ever since Ohio. Apparently they made it all the way from Ohio to the Nevada territory. Constantly talking about their cash. And that's what I, that's my theory of the cash cow. The more you talk about it, the more safe you are.

Yeah, lots of gold, no guns. No guns. No guns. Well, it seems to concern Adam. I always park in the Walmart parking lot. Look me up. Why do you park in a Walmart but go get a wall at a park park? Think about it. Now they don't teach you that in school. I don't think that's God speaking through you. Oh. Sometimes you can tell if you're moved by the spirit or if it's just it's just trash.

Sometimes you can tell not always. All right well that's fair we got Adam and Regina by the water collecting some water there and that this is the point where he says you disturb me very much is a Regina Regina Regina I never regina and then she says I'm disturbed by the also Adam That's a first sign it's meant to be that's a dirty language deep discomfort that you have initially with your spouse yeah well you inherently don't feel good you're not in love unless you're barfing yes deeply deeply disturbed so much you need to be medicated but now now now. Now deeply disturbed. So much you need to be medicated.

But now, the other cartwrights right up and it looks like it's going to be a problem because old Ben Cartwright, you're on Ponderosa land, he says to these Quakers. But then Adam rolls up, he says, hey, Pop, I'm here and I found a woman. Stop cock blocking me, yeah. And the Mormons, not the Quakers. Qe theirers. Qua. Qua. Qua. Qua. their the qua. the qua. the qua. they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. Pop. thi. thoom. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. thoo. thoooo. thooo. We. the thooooooooooooooo. So.. Yeah, and the Mormons, not the Mormons, where they either, the Quakers invite them to dinner, and they all sit down and break bread together. It's delicious. And that's when a hoss and Joe noticed that Sam wears his gun easy.

They don't like that. They don't like that. Does that mean cocked? I I that. that. that. that. that. that. It. that. I. that. I. that. I. I. that. I. I. that. I. that. that. that. that. th. th. they. I. I's. they. I. I's. th. th. they. T. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T............................................ It......... And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they're. And, they're all. And, they're. they're all. they're all. they. they're all. they're all. they're all. they. Qua. They're all all. Theythat ready to pull. Yeah, it's I don't know. It looks like he knows how to get his gun out fast. Something like that. It's in a shawl. Yeah, he's got it one of those little papooses like he put a baby in. That's right. Yeah, it looks like it's sleeping. A lot of women in the southwest of the US who are, you know, gun fans like me, you got to get like just a casual gun, like a caddy, you know, that you can, that's just more fashionable than something you're wearing around your waist and you know, you want something that says, this

is my gun. Yeah, that's a good idea. Something, something fashionable. A Daringer. Yeah. Keep it in a fanny pack? Well, I mean... It's a mixed message. That's. That's a that's a that's a gun. That's a gun. That's a gun. That's a gun. That's a gun. That's a gun. That's a gun. That's a gun. that's a gun. that's a gun. that's a gun. that's a gun gun gun gun gun gun gun gun gun gun gun. that's a gun gun. that's a gun gun gun gun gun. that's a gun. that's a gun gun gun gun gun gun gun. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a th. It's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a th. th. th. th. th. th keeping in a fanny pack. Yeah, keep a gun in a fanny pack. Well, I mean... It's a mixed message. That's... that's a bit liberal for me. I hear you. All right, so you got, they have dinner and that's when we learn about the strong box full of money connected to one of them wagons. Sam seems to to take an interest in it. And then, uh, is this when, yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th. It's, th. It's, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th. That's, the, the, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's a that's a that's a that one of them wagons. Sam seems to take an interest in it. And then is this when yeah, okay. I forget what Sam is doing but he gets approached by old Shenandoah who spotted him back in Virginia City and he's got two henchmen with them. And it's, they don't go into much detail but it seems like there's a little bit back story that old Sam board owes money to Shenandoah and his henchman. And he says, you got an hour to get me my money. So Sam knows he's got to get his hands on this. He's got to steal the Quaker's money to pay back Shenandoah.

He's got to do it. And so he go, is that what he does? And he goes to do it? No, he steals the money. Is that what he does? I think he first says he's going to leave. Oh, who care? And then he goes with them. Is that when now that happened that you just said and then they come up on him after they've circled the wagons? Yeah, so there's that time for. Hosk gets them to circle the wagons. Well isn't hoarding money a bit of an issue with most religion? Yeah now is there anything in the

Bible about circling wagons? You allowed to circle your waivies. Well you you just got to look through the Bible and just see what fits your situation that that kind of builds up your argument. I see. That's how you do it. I am familiar with people doing that with the Bible. Yeah, that's how you do it. Can't try and do that with a goddamn Stephen Wright joke you never could. Yeah, yeah that's a definitely point of view. Yeah, so okay that's what happened. Sam says goodbye I I'm leaving y' the tm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. the th. th. thi. the the th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm the. the. the. theeeeeeeeean. theean. theeeeean. theeean. thee. the. I'm the. I'm th goodbye. I'm leaving y'all. I don't want to be a part of this team anymore Meanwhile, he's right up ahead with his three other guys to lay and wait to try to ambush the wagon train That's what happens and then it's Adam and the hoss get on to it because they see the horse tracks and they realize oh shit? We're in trouble. the thir th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. thr-wea, thr-wea, thr-wea, thr-wea, thr-wea, thr-wea, thr-wea, thr-wee, thrace, their, their, their, thr-wee, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their their, their their their their their their their their, their their their, their, thr-wee, thr-we'-we'-s, thr-s, thr-s, thr-s, thr-s, thr-s, thr-s, thr-s, thr-s, thr-a'-a, thr-weean, to be ambushed at the night time and sure enough that's what happens the three guys four guys come down attack the

wagon train there is a shootout and it's an argument there because Regina seemed to add them to put that guy put that gun away well I'm gonna no reason for that and he's saying but you're gonna get attacked and all that and he's saying but you're gonna get to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their train. train. train. train. train. train. train. train. train. train. their their their their their their their their their like, well, we'll try to, if somebody comes to steal all our money, we'll try to reason with them, and if not, they can take our money. Yeah, because she read Hebrews, which is keep your lives free from the love of money. There you go. Be content with what you have. But Adam won't stand for that. And so it, outring the bullets. And Jacob, Jacob is shot dead, old Jacob there. He killed and the two henchmen fall. They both die, the bad guys.

But Shenandoah and Sam make it out with the money, don't they? And that really changes the schema for their business plan. You know, with Jacob being gone. Now we're going to have to move someone into their business plan, you know, with Jacob being gone. Now we're going to have to move someone into the head leadership position. And yeah. Yep, my money's on Matthew. But then there's less people to share the promise land with. And there's ain't no money.

They was going to get themselves a stake of land. Yeah. Well, they had already been to the land in their minds. Oh. I'm starting, I'm starting a business where I relocate people, but it's through your mind. Oh, like total recall. Yeah, so people who say, oh, the world's on fire, I want to go to Canada. We go there together in our minds. You go with them. Yeah. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, the the the the the the the the the their their their their they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're their. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, the their. Oh, their. Oh, the the the the their the their their the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their to go to Canada. We go there together in our minds. You go with them. Yeah, I described Toronto from a library book. That's a good idea. It's filled with condos, beautiful condos,

and you stand on the top of your penthouse condo in Toronto, and you say, oh, Canada. You really have the experience. So you don't, you don't Canada, you really have the experience so you don't you don't even have to get there. Oh shit, I'm in goddamn Canada right now. I gotta get back California, son, bet. Me too. Oh shit, oh wait a minute, it was a mind trick. Why would somebody want to go to goddamn Canada? Because in their condo developments they do around every night so that everyone goes to sleep. the experience the experience. the experience. the experience. the experience. the experience. the experience. the experience.. You the experience. You the experience. You the experience. You the experience. You the experience. You the experience. You the experience. You the experience. You the experience. You the experience. You the experience. You you you the experience. You the experience. You really really really really really you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you the experience. You the experience. You the experience. You the experience. You their their their their their their their th. You really really really really really really really really have. to th. thi. thi. thi. You're to really have to really have their their their their their their their their their their the? It's practically the- Because in their condo developments, they do around every night so that everyone goes to sleep.

It goes, make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other's cold. And then each new condo says, make new friends, until everyone slowly loses consciousness. It's a, it's society as it was meant to be. When you live in a condo in Toronto. That's right. Every single night?

Every single night. I never heard that before, but I don't doubt that it's true. Is that a Quaker town? My God? Must be. Well, it's owned by the Russians. Toronto is? Good for them. Okay.

Same with Santa Barbara. Here's what happens. Adam and Haas say, we are going to ride off ahead and we're going to get Sam and Shenandoah and we're going to get your damn money back and the Quaker say, no, never mind, forget it. We don't want the money. Everything's fine. No, it has to happen. That's got to be. And they ride to the town of Slatersville on the way they find did Shenandoah to be revived in a 1965 series by the same author.

And then, so he's dead because Sam and Shenandoah had a little fallen out there about who's going to get the money. It's greed, greed. Greed. Gdowdy. We are in Slatersville and it comes right down to the big moment there where Adam comes face to face with Sam Bored who's carrying the money right on him, right in the middle of the street and it's going to be a shootout to the death. But there's Regina saying no Adam don't. And Adam pushes her aside.

He says get her away from me. And they shots are fired. Another Quaker goes down. That's Matthew. Oh but he died? Yeah. Matthew died. So they lost their they lost their second in command. They lost their they lost their bin Laden and their alsewiri. But you know what that means? That's less to split the money with. Oh yeah that's true and now they're gonna get it back thanks to Adam. Yeah and you know dishonest money dwindles away but whoever gathers money little by little makes it grow. Oh is that another god-dame Stephen right Joe? Ben Laden? How long? That's proverbs. Oh that's proverbs I should have known. Well but and now that's the end of the relationship. These two, I mean I skipped over

some of the parts where man oh man they're just gazing into each other's eyes and making out like a couple of teenagers. You've never seen two people so in loving your life, Regina and Adam and he even has the talk with Ben where Ben is like are you sure you want to ride off and hit your wagon to these weird Quakers they're so different. And Adam says, I know what I'm doing, Paul. Yeah, that's it. He's gone. He's leaving. She's church girl, horny.

She is. Yeah, she is. Yeah, he says there's something about you. And we all know what that is. It's that she, yeah, there's something odd about people who are restricted that they get freaky. Yeah, yeah. Adam knows that to look at her. She doesn't know that you don't want to be cornhole your first time. Exactly. That's the subtext of that scene when they ride into Virginia City and he's looking at her.

He goes, she doesn't have any idea what to expect. She doesn't know there's another way. Nobody told her nothing. Boy, I didn't know until about 10 years in to my marriage and I said what? Oh we laughed and left. Oh man, ten years a long time. I tell it, it's the poo poles, the loophole. Stephen Wright. Well, yeah. No, Stephen Wright.

He, here's... I got a new dog. He's a paranoid retriever. He brings back everything because he's not sure what I threw him. Well, what do you mean everything? Yeah. Brings back everything? You have to put that dog down. That dog is literally running out and bringing everything to you.

Well, I was making a mockery of the mental health issues in this country. And yeah, you can't paint the world, but you can have a dog bring you everything in the world. That dog would be a menace to the community and would have to be shot, Stephen, right? Bring its own gun to shoot it with. Yeah, right. Go fetch me a gun and I can shoot you in the face. All right. Well, that's it. So the two of them part company because she is nonviolent and he is committed like a religion to violence. Yeah. And to gunning people down and doing what's right in a man way. And so they cannot get togethers. Oh, well. Oh well. Too bad. Too bad. Too bad. Too bad. At th. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. th. Well. th. Well. th. th. th. th. Well. Well. th. th. th. th. Well. th. th. th. Well. Well. th. th. th. Well. th. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. th. th. Well. th. Well. th. th. th. Well. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. thogether. Oh well. Too bad, too bad. Too bad. At least she didn't die, which I thought she's gonna. Yeah, we thought.

I know. You know, and I always want to have a follow-up episode about what happened all those ladies? Like just a full follow-up episode covering all the lives of ladies who've left left the show or pass through the show for a few seconds. Yeah, that's a good idea. The Ladies of Bonanza. That'd be nice, yeah. Be about 20 seconds long. And it kind of sounds like an after-dark show, a cabaret of some kind, or less the Ladies of Bonanza. Yeah, right. All right.

Cornhole, open. That's what it's called. Cornhole, colon, the ladies of bonanza. Cornhole, colon. Well, folks. I'm sorry to say, we only have 394 episodes left at this. You believe that? I can't even.

What is going on in the world? So are you guys gonna put some cash in the cash cow? Well, where is it? You gotta hear it? It's parked outside. I take cash, and I put it in the cow, and I say, boo, and I keep, I keep a written record of all the money that you give me, so it's for sure, the the their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, touch, touch, touch, touch, touch, touch, to, touch, touch, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the money that you give me so it's for sure you're going to get it back when you need it. That's more than a bank will do. When you only when you need it. Where's that cash that we had them people send us in? Oh yeah. You know what I mean? Some cash came into the PO box hundreds and hundreds of dollars. Now it does say movie prop money on it or something like that. Oh, no this is real cash. Oh, all right. that. th. th. th. th. th. that. th. that. th. th. that. th. that. th. th. th. that. that. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the only only only only only only only only. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only. th. th. th. something like that. Not legal. No, this is real cash.

All right, all right. All right, nice trap mud. Well, somebody gave me a check and I said, well, I'll keep that too. But, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All right, well, I'll put all the money, all the cash I can in that band and and then track it and yeah but you know that you aren't gonna get it well I mean unless it's a real emergency unless I have I unless I have expended all other

options for paying my rent yeah if you can still blink and write through a computer you don't need the money because that means you can write a memoir about what just happened to you. That was a tragedy. I still got a bunch of blockbuster bucks, which was just like redeem bullet blockbuster. Could I put that in there? Yeah, for sure. Anything that, you know, you go out on the street, you do everything, you know, because

people say, oh I need money, oh I, it's an emergency. When it is not. You go, have you, have you done this? Have you thought about taking your old teeth, you know, taking some of your old teeth and seeing if you- What do you mean old teeth? Well, I'm not using anymore? Have you ever, well, sometimes if you don't have a dentist, you know, I took out my wisdom teeth myself. You did?

Yeah, I had a couple of shots. And I says, you know, how long is it going to take me? And it didn't take me that long. And then I kind of passed out from the blood. Well, you got them out. I got them out. And now I keep them in, well, in the cash, well, in the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the cash, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, tha, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, t I say that's something that's valuable you know whatever you know your trash is someone else just treasure I don't know when that's going to come in in handy for me you go you put that on eBay today Amy

Sleverson's self-removed wisdom teeth get some money I'd think so yeah yeah or at least as a jewelry you know because I'm still doing my multi-level marketing at all of all my product lines and yes, it's confusing and yes, there aren't a lot of completed purchases, but you know, that's what I'm a hashtag girl boss and sometimes I can't always keep track of my inventories. Yeah, well I've got Nancy Sinatra tied up in the garage. That's my thing for like when I when it really gets bad, you know what I mean? You know Frank Sinatra's dead.

Oh shit! He is? Yeah. God damn it. Well there's got to be somebody that pay a few dollars for Nancy. See a Faroe possibly? Yeah, yeah. I've got 50 grand in a van. Oh do you th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th. th. th th th' th thi thi thi that that that that th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi thi thi thi, thi. I I thi. I've thi. I've thi. I've theea' that that that that that that that that thi. I've thi. I've th Faro possibly? Yeah, yeah. I've got 50 grand in a van. Oh, do you want Nancy Sinatra? That's a bit more than I was thinking of. What does she do? She still sing to you about her boots? Yeah, and you only live twice? Mm-hmm. Oh gosh, I mean unless I, if she wanted to be a second driver. I'll bet you would. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. All right. That, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's that's that. that's that's that's that's that's to you to you to you to you to you to you to you that's that's. Do you that's. Do you that's. Do you that's. Do you that. that. that. that. that. that. Do. that. that. Do, that. that. that. that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th you th you th. to you to to to you to to to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you she wanted to be a second driver. I bet she would. Yeah, yeah. All right, that sounds good. That's a new thelma and Louise. Amy and Nancy driving to cash cow across the country. All right folks, that's an episode of Bananas for Bananza. We thank you so much for joining us. Thank you. All right. We'll do another one of these when we do one. So long, get down! with Maria Bamford and Matt Gorley. Theme song by Matt Gorley with The Journeyman, which in this case are Mark McCondville, Daniel Mitchikoff, and Wade Ryan.

Bananas for Bonanza is mixed and edited by Brett Morris and Andy Daly, Matt Gorley, Brett Morris, and Little Scott Ackerman. We'll see you next time. As women, our life stages come with unique risk factors, like high blood pressure developed during pregnancy, which can put us two times more at risk of heart disease or stroke. Know your risks. Visit Heart and Stroke.C.A. Academy Award winner Helly Berry. One touch without a robot is all in text.

Say it. Never let go. We're the world now. Never. Let go. In theater September 20th.