Boonta Vista - EPISODE 174: Ha Ha (Uh Oh)
Episode Date: November 10, 2020Lucy, Theo, and Andrew tackle Andrew Bolt's unflinching commitment to being the wrongest man in the room, Google's crackdown on Dutch seasonal racism, and Western Australia's disappearing time capsule... problem. Plus: Theo very nearly does his famous "anthem rant" again. *** Support our show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista *** Email the show at mailbag@boontavista.com! Call in and leave us a question or a message on 1800-317-515 to be answered on the show! *** Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista Website: boontavista.com Merchandise: boontavista.com/merchandise Twitch: twitch.tv/boontavista
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Welcome to Buntavista, episode 174.
My name is Andrew and I'm here at the Four Seasons Hotel where there is nothing going on.
Standing around the lobby, it's really quite empty. People's footfalls are echoing,
around the large room where there was really not that much activity. Standing next to me and just checking her watch
over and over again it's Lucy. Hi it's just it's really weird because I mean
the presidential election just happened and there's just there's just
nothing going on. I'm having a really quiet day here at my job.
And there's a lot of room. There's a lot of room. There's a lot of room. I mean it's a hotel.
What I would do here if like if it was up to me is I would probably have some kind of like a conference here
or a meeting of some kind. Okay, these are interesting ideas. Mm-hmm. Frantically pacing around by the
front door and insisting to the people coming through that he's doing some kind of security sweep as he pats their pockets and
buttocks. It's Theo. Hey, hey you going. So you say like security sweep but really
not a lot of people coming in. Just not a lot of people here. I thought it'd be a bump a day.
I mean it's the coronavirus you know no one's traveling it's well yeah so sort of making my job very easy which I can probably knock off early I got to
do a bit of shopping afterwards does anyone know where I can find a dildo
shop and a crematorium I have two separate items of business that I have
a body to be cremated and I need to pick up a new dildo is there any where I could do both of these things like th th I the th I th I th I th I th I th I th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. I'm thi. I'm to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the thi. thi. I thi. the thi. thi. the. the. thee. thee. the theee. the theeee. theeeeee. tho. to to to to to to to to to ildo. Is there anywhere I could do both of these things like very quickly? How related are the two things? Very unrelated. I just, it's complete coincidence, but it is
a very specific requirement that I have. I have a body to dispose of and I need to rent an
industrial mulcher. Uh, no way to know where that could be. Hey, let's look over at the TV that happens to be in the lobby here.
There's Rudy Giuliani.
Fresh off of his world Borat 2 tour of touching his dick in front of somebody he thinks as a child.
Good time.
He sure did do that.
And that was seven years ago, I think.
So long ago in the grand scheme. I'm so times. You sure did do that. And that was seven years ago, I think. It was so long ago in the grand scheme. I'm so tired. Oh boy.
So we've all, we've all heard what this is now. It is the funniest thing to occur in human history.
That is what that is. It's so funny that I can hardly believe that it's real.
No absolutely. Anything so good could happen in the year 2020. I saw it online and I thought, okay,
this has to be fake.
And then I saw more people posted online
and I thought, oh, this must be a misunderstanding of what has occurred.
Because it's just a photo,
there's a horrible, like, Adobe Wall or something and a stand, and you think, oh, okay, well, look, it could it it it it could it could it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it could, it, it, it, it could, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it's, it, it's, it's, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, th. that, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th., it could be anybody though that's doing that.
Surely it's not Rudy Giuliani doing a press conference at the Four Seasons total landscaping
in between a Dildo store and a crematorium.
Which I assume is just the industrial store room for the people that do the landscaping
at a Four Seasons hotel.
It is really the fishwick of...
It's very fishwick for sure.
Well, there's also like, I saw something where somebody was ringing around to all the different
businesses named Four Seasons something.
Like around the same town, they were like, no, we haven't heard anything. But surely the thing that is most puzzling to all of us in this occurrence, which is that, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi's very very very very very thi's very very very the the the thi's very very very very very the the thi's very very very the thi's very thi's very thi. It's very, heard anything but um but surely the thing
that is most puzzling to all of us in this occurrence which is that Donald
Trump has by this point officially lost his re-election campaign everybody
agrees there's really no clawing it back at this point yeah so that
happened eat shit each shit I think we can all say that big eat shit from the show and
he is I guess intending to launch a series of legal challenges.
The only problem is that his crack legal team is headed up by Rudy Giuliani, who seems to constantly
be having some kind of meltdown. And Jared Kushner, who is juggling seven books that are
all American law for idiots.
It's a busy man.
Extremely busy man.
He's trying to solve that Middle East deal, you know?
Oh, I thought he'd done that.
He probably has.
So they said, hey, let's book us a little press conference,
where we can talk to people about how he totally didn't lose the election because of his hyper-competent re-election campaign.
Very competent stuff.
And I guess instead of booking the four seasons hotel, they booked four seasons total landscaping
between a sex shop and a crematory.
Would not be a thing. I don't imagine that any conference of any kind has ever happened at the Four Seasons Total
Landscaping, right?
So...
Imagine, I'm phoning up, hey, can we book it?
Right.
Huh?
And some teenager is like, ah, I'll ask my boss.
They're like, sure, come down and make a boer.
the whole lot.
So the part of this that is, I mean obviously a lot of aspects of this are kind of mind-numbing.
The part that I have a lot of trouble with is that this happened and then people found out
that it had happened, like the booking. And then they went, well, it's pretty late in the day. And th, and th, and th, and the th, and the th, and th, and the th, and th, and the th, and the th, and the th, and th, and the th, and the the the the the the th, and the the the the the the the, the the the, the, the, the, thi, thi, thi, thi, the thi, the the, the, the the, th, th, th, th, the th, the th, the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the, the the that, the the that, the the the that, the that, the the that, the that, that, the that, ththat it had happened, like the booking.
And then they went, well, it's pretty late in the day, and that's the only booking we managed to get.
So I guess we have to do it there.
No option but to continue. There's no option we couldn't stop at any point and just say, not do this, not rock up to the four seasons total landscaping.
And do your last press conference there?
That's the best thing is I feel like this is you know the last vision of the Trump administration.
It is the absolute encapsulation of of their competence I think.
And seeing Rudy Giuliani find out live during the press conference that it was over.
That it had been called by all the networks.
Better than Bush finding out about 9-11. Really. Yeah, I just, I don't know, I love the idea that they couldn't have just said, oh, so what we do is we immediately try to book a real place to have a conference.
And then when we get asked about this, we say, no, no, wasn't me?
That's not a real thing, that's a silly thing, someone said to a reporter, and you idiots believed it.
He fools, cowards.
As opposed to, going down to the landscaping supply store and putting up and putting up to the the the to to the landscaping supply store and putting
up a bunch of Trump signs and taking your own podium to the landscaping
supply store. Yeah they had to take their own podium because there wasn't one at
the four seasons landscaping store for some reason. I wonder why?
Didn't have their own podium set up. A. V. Facilities just terrible. I got I gotta say you guys are pretty poorly set up for
press conferences down here at the four seasons. Have you got one of those
doggles that like goes into a Macbook 2013 and then comes out as like a
HMI thing and the guys like well we got blood and bone what the fuck do you
want from us? It's just such an enjoyable time to be online. I'm not excited by a Biden presidency but I think we can't th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi the the the the the the thi the the the the the the the the the the the th. the the the the the the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. th th. th. I the the. I the the the the the the the the the the the theate the theat the the the theat the the the the the the th? It's just such an enjoyable time to be online.
I'm not excited by a Biden presidency,
but I think we can all admit that watching Donald Trump lose, specifically,
was extremely satisfying and very fun.
Very much, and I think he will continue to have a tantrum about it for a very long time.
I think that his...
Oh yeah, it's not over.
Yeah, his most fervent supporters will they will
they will do the behavior that has characterized his term in office which is
believing whatever he says to the contrary of any and all like logic or evidence
that is supplied to them through the world and they're all eating it up
which is great I love it's very healthy can't see what's going to go wrong in America from now on. Yeah. I guess the problem is that
well the thing that's fine for those people right is that they can continue just posting about this on
Facebook. They can continue posting like about mail in ballots on Stop the Steel 3.0 private Facebook group.
And that's fine.
They'll be in a nice group of like-minded individuals.
There is a bit of an issue for, I guess, political prognosticators who have spent a whole
bunch of time insisting that Trump was 1,000 percent going to get back in, insisting that
Joe Biden was an old-dazed, demented.
I mean he is.
He is all the clock is twice.
Yep, okay.
They're not wrong on this.
Unfortunately.
And the fact that he won by such a small margin is deeply embarrassing for the Democrats,
for the record.
Absolutely.
So yeah, the problem is that if you make your money,
trying to act like you actually know anything about what's going to happen politically,
then you might be attempted to change gears at this point.
If you have someone like George Christensen, for example,
you might just continue to post about electoral fraud forever.
Right.
But if you have someone like notorious dipshit
Andrew Bolt, right-wing columnist and the Herald Sun and all that sort of thing,
then you have to continue posting as though you have a big brain and are
very smart. So I've forgotten that Andrew Bolt even existed, you know I feel
like we haven't been hearing much from him. People have forgotten about him. Yeah I
I think so. To an extent. And of course,
all the way through Trump's presidency, he's basically been, you know, doing his columns
along the lines of, the worst thing in the world anyone can ever do is virtue signal, and that's why
they don't understand how great Trump is. Yeah. We also had Miranda Divine get exported over there to the New York Post to cover Trump during the campaign.
But Andrew Bolt's really upset that he's never been asked to go over to the US to have his opinions?
He probably is, but I don't think he has Miranda's ass-kissing energy.
That's true. Yeah.
She is truly committed to, describing him as, you know, after he got his
COVID diagnosis, describing him as like the invincible leader.
Yeah, right.
Like, like some pretty psycho stuff, you know.
Andrew Bolt, however, likes to present himself, I guess as like a really, I've got my head screwed on straight kind of guy.
Yeah, I'm a smart guy. I just love Donald Trump.
Blue Sky Thinker.
Yeah.
So he posted an article.
Well, he posts, sorry, a blog post.
On the Andrew Bolt blog on the Herald Sun.
Yep.
So the Andrew, the Andrew Bolt blog is primarily Andrew Bolt's blog posts and two thirds
of them are like three sentences from an article and then a link
to the article. Which more often than not is pay walled.
So you did do a blog post on the night titled, Ha ha! November 4th. On the Bolt report on Sky
at 7 p.m., Donald Trump seems to have won again, celebrate with me and let's hammer home the Bolt report on Sky at 7pm, Donald Trump seems to have won again.
Celebrate with me and let's hammer home the lessons.
Some gloating will be unavoidable.
He got that right, bitch.
That sure will be.
And then he updated that somewhere inside 12 hours later, uh, changing the headline from Ha Ha Ha to Uh-oh.
It's so funny.
With the much more tempered update, late count swings to Biden.
That's all it says.
It's not like, sorry I fucked up.
It just says update.
That is such a, I've just gone away and Googled the thing that I was having an argument with my partner with about
on Wikipedia it turns out I'm wrong. Also when did he even post this? I don't
remember a time where the election looked like Donald Trump had won it.
No, no I think it for a while there he was in between they were just like
keeping pace or he was like a little bit in front of the start as the big
obvious states came in. But yeah it was never a
point where it was like oh no it's an absolute luck. So he has also been been
posting things since then to say hey allegations of voter fraud are dangerous and now he's completely changed his gears to say, hey, allegations of voter fraud are dangerous. And now he's completely changed his gears to say
Donald Trump would have won, if only
he had not been Donald Trump.
As the, with the title, bragging Donald Trump through this election
damn Donald Trump for throwing away this election. Conservatives around the world will now pay for his ludicrous braggarious bragging to say to say, to say, to say to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to to to say, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, to to to say, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, to to the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their threw this election away. Damn Donald Trump for throwing away this election, conservatives around the world will now
pay for his ludicrous bragging, bullying and lying.
Trump would have won if he'd just acted like a president, if he'd acted with dignity and
discipline.
I'm enjoying that it's now the problem.
This is, he lost a thing.
The exact person that he has been for four years.
For, for the 70 years, yeah.
Forever, for his entire life.
Like, why wasn't he more dignified?
But the thing that we've all known about Trump's most
like die-hard supporters the whole time is that is exactly what they love it.
They love it.
They want more of it.
Absolutely. Everybody who disagrees with me is a fucking idiot and I hate them. Like, you know,
you look at the, look at the stuff like, um, the, the Trump train convoys and stuff where people had
like, uh, you know, dummies with Antifa written on them, strapped across the hood of their car, like, you know, dummies with antifa written on them strapped across the hood of their
car, like they'd run them over and killed them.
Like true, true politics of hatred.
And I think for a lot of people, all kind of, to all sorts of different extenes, that
was what they liked about him was that it was just razing other people.
That's their entire world view.
That's all they want from politics.
If he had been dignified and disciplined the whole time, those people wouldn't have voted him in the first place.
And, yeah, it's funny that he suddenly has a problem with his bragging and bullying and lying.
Yeah, you're a hundred percent right. mean, the reason that Donald Trump,
against all expectations, arrived at the top of the
dung heap of the Republican primary,
was the fact that he bullied all of those reasonable, polite,
horrible suit-wearing dipshits into the ground and everyone watched that and laughed at it.
And they said this is the most incredible thing. We, like you can just think of that incredible picture of
Mitt Romney having dinner with Donald Trump just eating shit. That was his whole deal. He just made
people eat shit. He made all of those sensible options, eat big bowls of shit for months and months,
and that's why he became president.
And that's why a lot of people were like, let's do this again.
Yeah.
Let's take another ride.
Let's have another ride.
Keeps going.
Let's fucking do it.
Let's take it to the comment section of Andrew Poe's post about how Trump should have won.
And I would say having looked at the comments on this blog a lot in the past that they generally
seem to be a kind of 10 to 1 ratio of Pro-Bolt comments versus the occasional person saying,
you're a big supercritic gig.
It's a curious specific kind of breed of melt that comments on the Andrew Bolt post.
So enjoy that.
So, um, but the comments on this one, things like Rowan says, if only these things had
come to light during Trump's presidency.
And so what you're saying is, if Trump had won the election he would have won it but he didn't.
Incredible.
We've also got somebody saying, oh so if you consider him to be a bully and liar, why were you
supporting him so strongly the whole time?
And I particularly liked somebody saying, oh in reply to that, oh, he didn't really
support him that strongly.
And I replied, you must have missed the ha ha, blog.
I think it's well and truly an underappreciated part of conservatives losing, is seeing them immediately turn on
each other like the coyotes that they are? It's so good. Love it.
Not like the left. Whose fault is there?
We'll kill each other while like while we're winning an election. Yeah.
I wonder what what Miranda Divine has to say about it.
Oh, it's a postroom November 8th.
If there's fraud in the 2020 election, then we must find it.
Yeah, no, no, she's all on team fraud.
She's all in on this horse shit.
Where else can you go?
No one's being like, you know what, we lost this election. Because why would you? You can just say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that's that's that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. this election. Because why would you? You can just say that there was fraud and never, never change your mind on it.
Well and I think it's very much like the entire Russia Gate thing, you know?
Like, oh yeah, absolutely.
That's, it's, this is just going to be their Russia Gate forever is just going to be.
But her emails.
Yeah, but her emails. Nobody has ever proved to me thuuuuuuuuuuuuuu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. It, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. It's, thooooooooooooooooooooooooo. And, thee. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, the her emails, nobody has ever proved to me to any significant extent that
this actually happened, but that will not stop me from believing it.
That's right.
It is 100% going to spend the next four years at the very least, pretending like Biden is
an illegitimate president because of all this shit, it will never get resolved.
And people continue doing that until they vote in, so on,
even more heinous and more calculating and destructive than Donald Trump.
So.
It's very funny because, you know, Republicans and Biden, they got so much in common.
You know, they could come together on so many issues.
He could be your guy.
Like, it's, that's the problem. Oh, there's a's a, so, so Miranda Devine on her most recent column post Biden victory.
She's, she's done the most excellent conservative heel turn, her face turn, sorry, here, which is,
she says, there's more evidence of voter fraud in the 2020 election than there ever was of Russia collusion.
Untrue, just patently untrue.
So America is owed a legal examination of the election irregularities alleged by the
Trump campaign.
It's not crazy to say this, despite the gas lighting from much of the media.
Oh, you think gas lighting's a thing now?
Interesting. Wow, think gas lighting's a thing now? All of a sudden? Interesting. Wow,
triggered much? Basically, the election is down to roughly 120,000 votes of almost 150 million
votes cast. I don't think it is. No, I don't think it is. This is one, a very dumb thing
that we see come out of close elections, right, where people are like, hmm, well I think you'll find the elections decided by these two states.
And the problem with that is no, it fucking isn't, because the elections decided by all
these other massive states that vote in huge numbers for one side or the other, right?
So if one of those states flipped, you'd be in a totally fucked situation.
So the concept that Donald Trump lost by 120,000 votes, it's ridiculous.
That's not, it's very annoying.
And, you know, like, apart from the very, very large issue that seems to be what the
majority of Republicans who are complaining about this, including Trump, seem to be thinking of as electoral fraud, voter
fraud and ballot fraud, is votes being counted after polls closed? Yes. The votes being
counted after Donald Trump to his supporters specifically was like, don't vote by mail, it's fraudulent.
And then him being like, why are all these mail votes for Joe Biden?
Well, it seemed like the strategy as much as there was one.
You would think that maybe one strategy for an election
would be to say, here's what I'm going to do for you in my second term, but that wasn't it.
The strategy, as far as I could tell, seemed to be,
try to convince everybody that mail-in votes are fraudulent
so that you can get people to insist on voting in person
and the only people who will want to line up in big crowds and vote in person
are my supporters, because his supporters are scared of the China virus and
the problem is that everybody went mail-in ballots are legal in my state
are fine and that's fine right no it's it's absolutely ridiculous a total like
called shot to say we're going to steal the election and this is the way in which that we're going to do it like they've been running the delegitimization of to say, we're going to steal the election and this is the way in which that we're going
to do it.
Like, they've been running the delegitimization of mail-in ballots and late ballots for months
and months.
And everyone's like, oh, okay, he's going to try and delegitimize this and then afterwards
claim that they're not legitimate votes and steal the election. While a whole bunch of people, including, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, the, the, the, they, they, they, they, they're, they're, they're, the, they' they're th, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, they, th, they, they, they, they, they, they' they' they' they' they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're legitimate votes and steal the election.
While a whole bunch of people, including Gideon Rosner, who we covered in the other episode,
was like, I think you'll find he's not going to do that, which he said on November the
7th.
Just looking back up at that, being incredibly wrong by just like two hours.
So very fun, very enjoyable.
We actually spend a lot of time just rounding up the very dumb takes from the very dumb
people that populate our horrible media landscape on the bonus episode, so check that out.
The worst part of this election, for me for me personally has being just having to watch Australian
commentators like they just have to say something and they have no idea about
America. Yeah but so they have to filter it through the only their only
understanding of the world and politics so we see that with like Joe
Hildebrand's article which we talked about on the bonus where did the only the only lens that he has to look
through is the woke left right the the concept of wakness lost this election and
it's just it's saddening I just I saw an article by him and it was like the
election was decided by Midwestern states
like Pennsylvania yeah I was like please sir just just you don't know a thing
you don't have to you can just say that I don't really know what I'm talking
about it's completely fine perhaps not if you're a legally obligated to have a
dumb fucking opinion once a week to get your money but you know not like us
couldn't be us. Ha ha ha.
Podcasts.
They're nature's greatest natural resource and it's important that they're harvested sustainably.
Editing, production, fart sound effects.
These are all important resources from our local ecosystems.
That's why we're asking you to go to Patreon.com slash Buntavista and pledge five US dollars
a month to help support the healthy growth of a homegrown podcast like Buntavista.
In exchange you'll get an extra sustainably farmed episode every week, access to our
discord and a naturally pristine promo-free podcast feed.
Thank you for helping look after one of nature's most precious resources. Oh boy, anyway that was a very fun, very
enjoyable. We all liked it. It was a great day and eat shit Donald Trump, we can all say
that. That's right. Today we'll think fondly about well into the future.
Really was pleasant, really enjoyed myself.ly about well into the future. Really was pleasant. Really enjoyed myself.
And far off in the future, maybe we'll be thinking about things in the past and attempting
to dig them up. In this segment, the one thing we didn't want to happen.
This is the one thing we didn't want to happen.
That's right. So this is a story that I think we saw a little while ago and Ben was very desperate to talk
about.
But then he foolishly chose to do a shift at the bar instead of being available to talk
about it right now.
Wow, what a fucking piece of shit.
Idiot.
Beautiful idiot. First up, this is from the ABC, mid-October.
Yaloop Primary School in massive underground search for missing time capsule.
Did time capsules actually get dug up? I've never had one dug up that I've seen in my life.
I feel like people don't wait long enough.
No one cares.
No, nobody cares.
And the fact that they bury these at primary school with a whole bunch of primary school
kids that are supposed to care about this and when in reality they're the people that care
about this the absolute least.
And they like dig something up and go, oh look here's some photos from the past and kids
are just like already just passing out from boredom.
It sucks.
Guess what now, bitch, we've got the internet.
Look, the digging up.
I disagree in that I think the digging up, yes kids would be bored by.
But this would be a pretty inexpensive way to convince
the entire school that they were taking part in like a scientific experiment of
some kind. That's true it's really it's a day-long activity. You put some
stuff in like a lock or lockbox and you bury it. The only problem is if you don't
remember where you buried it. So in this case, it says here in the ABC article,
metal detectors and a 20 meter excavated trench
have not been enough to find a time capsule
buried at the Yarlip Primary two decades ago,
but the school isn't ready to give up just yet.
For the past six weeks,
the workers at the school have been trying to find the capsule which was buried in 2000
in time for an unveiling ceremony later this year with former students.
That's what I thought.
You guys know that distant past the year 2000?
This is all like for people so they can come back and be like, oh, I buried a 98 degrees album.
Cool. I don't have a CD player to listen to it all. and be like, oh, I buried a 98 degrees album.
Cool, I don't have a CD player to listen to it on.
I buried my copy of Deus X.
Yeah.
Yep, it's all gonna be people who buried like some piece of music or software
and they're like, oh, I now have access to that and everything else in the world.
At all times.
Principal Mark Glethill said he thought the capsule which contained a bottle of red wine.
Okay.
All right.
Now I'm interested.
This is just one teacher's idea to make some wine more valuable.
And photos from students as well as their dreams of what the future may hold.
Let me tell you. I'd, it's better if you don't th you th you don't th you don't th you don't th you don't th you don't th you don't th you don't th you don't th you don't th you don't the the the the the the the the to to to to to to to theck theck theateatecklea' to to to to to thecklea. to th. toe. th. toe. toe. th. toe. th. th. toe. th. th. th. th. th. th. of what the future may hold. Oh, let me tell you.
It's better if you don't read those.
Oh boy.
This is for the best.
Oh boy.
Flying cars and, oh boy.
Cure for all disease.
No, we just got new ones.
We're just going to new diseases dropping.
Yeah, woo! I've got Tesla's though. Get excited.
Tesla's explode. You can't afford one. You can't take it back to the store if the roof
comes off while you're driving. Welcome to the Future, bitch. Woo! All porn is incest-themed.
Woo! Woo!
Anyway, it had been buried underneath a large rock on the school grounds.
We moved the rock and dug a six-foot hole underneath, and we couldn't find anything, he said.
We've probably dug about a 20-meter trench by two meters and still can't find the time capsule.
Jesus.
God.
Mr. Glett Hill said, several former students have come forward time capsule. Jesus. Mr. Glett Hill said several former students have
come forward to try to help. We've had metal detectors come out and have a
look. He said, one former student even donated the time and the use of his
excavator. We did find a power cable while we were doing the digging, Mr.
Glett Hill said, that of course got cut which cut power to the digging, Mr. Gledhill said, that of course got cut, which cut power to the school.
I just feel like all the other teachers are probably like, it's fucking Mr. Gledhill out
there again with a fucking time capsule. I'm just like cutting the entire power to
the school. This is white wail, he's like not coming back to teaching, hasn't shaved
in six weeks. It's disgusting. It's disgusting.
His wife wakes up in the morning and he's just sitting on the edge of the bed.
I was wrong, time capsule's rule.
Yeah, these are awesome.
Feet in hands covered in dirt, haunted look in his eyes.
If you guys know where your school buried a time capsule, just go in and remove it, apparently this is what happens. It just ruins people's lives.
The principal said he had not ruled out the prospect
that someone else had already dug up the capsule.
They might have been after the red wine in there maybe.
I'm not sure, he said.
All right, so Mr. Gladhill did it.
Very clearly.
Was he hiccuping when he said this?
It's like, I don't know, maybe someone's just really desperate for that bottle of red wine,
you know who could say?
Yeah, you know how kids who went to a school 12 years ago think to themselves?
Well, I'm 20 now.
Remember that time capture we buried?
I'm 20 now.
I've had like several beers, but the bottle shops are closed.
What am I going to do?
Oh, tie capsule. I do have an excavator.
Yeah, it's covering his tracks. Oh, you can use my excavator to look for it, he says.
Mm. Mm. Mm. Mm. Mr. Glett Hill opened, hoped the capsule would be found before the reunion, but
a decision had been made to delay the ceremony until next year.
What?
What the fuck are you doing, dude?
Nobody cares.
Nobody cares about this.
In the meantime, Mr. Gleadhill said the search would continue, but he intended to make it
the meantime, Mr. Gladhill said the search would continue, but he intended to make it the last one.
The next time, Capsuley said, certainly will not be going in the ground.
Right, because we have the internet.
It won't be going in a hole, he said.
It will be going in the library on a wall.
We figure it's pretty hard to lose a library.
That is challenge accepted. I also enjoy the fact that this guy didn't have to get a news at all. Like everything he's doing, delaying the ceremony, all this stuff is just
making. They could have just gone like, ah, nah, it's just not there. Sorry guys.
Sorry guys. Well, just have to do the ceremony without the time capsule.
But instead he's like, oh yeah, hello, local news.
Yeah, so you won't believe this. We couldn't find the time capsule.
So, what we've done is we have dug up about half the school.
Yep, no, through the power cable, absolutely.
Really big hole out there. No, we're not stopping. No, no, we're not going to stop looking.
That's fine. We're going to keep looking for this until we find it.
Um.
Good for him. Everyone's got to have a project, you know.
Oh boy, journalists wondering how he got the number, you know.
So I am enjoying this photo that Ben attached to the story.
Oh, it's really nice.
Which is a man standing in a...
I assume it's Mr. Gledhill himself.
I assume it's Mr. Glead Hill.
It must be.
In a, like a sandy area sort of thing, with his hands up in the air.
It's called a playground, Theo. A playground. Well, I don't spend so much time hanging around
primary schools. And his hands up in the air with clearly a fuck nose look on
his face. It's the international sign language for. Hmm. There is another story from
the ABC here. Unrelated, but related. Primary school digs up its decades-old time
capsule only to find it empty. Oh, it's sort of variation on the theme. A large crowd gathered
at Bilingup Primary School on Saturday for the long-awaited opening of a 25-year-old time
capsule buried in the school grounds. The kids were excited.
Many of the parents and generations of
former students had taken their phones out. The concrete slab had been dug up ahead of the
event and the plastic tube slid easily from the hole. I all know that feeling. It was like taking
a satisfying shit. Two pairs of hands were required to prize the lid from the capsule.
Hopefully something's in there, said the master of ceremonies.
The master of ceremonies.
That's a real thing for sure.
Hold on one second.
Hopefully there's something in there.
This is the one thing we didn't want to happen.
There was nothing in there.
The onlookers enjoyed a hearty laugh in the moments to follow.
What am I holding my camera for?
Why?
I feel like I wouldn't be laughing.
I'm pretty pissed.
What am I holding my camera for? Oh I feel like
it was like three people laughing really hard and everyone else kind of pissed.
Yeah. I would be laughing. I would find this. This would be the only way I could be
interested in anything that's going on here. I've got my phone around already. I'm not filming
this or anything. Oh. I enjoyed a hearty laugh, but soon the big question was asked,
what had happened here?
And then they go on to give an update about the Yalu Primary mystery, which has apparently
still not been solved.
Oh, that's very funny.
It's very funny. And now to continue with the theme that we have discussed, the big question, the the big, but, the big, the big, the big, the big, but, the big, the big, the big, the big, but, the big, the big, the big, the big, but, the big, the big, but, the big, the big, but, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big, th, the big, the big, the big, the big, the big th. the big question, the big question, the big question, the, theat, thi, theat, thi big question, thi, thi big question, thi, thi, thi, thi, the big question, the big question, the, thi, the big question, that's very funny. It's very funny. Now to continue with a theme
that we have been discussing of late, we're going from black holes to black
faces. That's right. We're going back to the Netherlands. Can we just...
It's the... You reckon the Dutch national anthem is in the public domain?
it have to be right. I assume National Anthems are.
Absolutely.
Oh my goodness.
Now, I'll have to go and listen to that now, I bet it's...
Do you want to hear the Dutch National Anthem?
Yes, Dutch National Anthem.
I'm going to look up some translated lyrics.
Pipe it in. Probably is played on the pipe, you know,
because they'd be smoking that weed pipe in the Netherlands.
They do, they really do.
Here we go.
Just finding some English lyrics.
My goodness. You have won the gold medal for Blackface.
How do you feel?
That kind of sucks.
Tears running down their face, smearing all the black face.
This is... You know, there's no real melody to this.
Dutch National Anthem, epic version.
It is pretty freaking epic. It is pretty freaking epic.
Boo!
Yeah, that was a real lockdown actually.
I don't know, we don't want to start getting dragged about our national anthem.
I mean, now's is this fucking terrible.
This is awful.
And I, all right.
And the fucking thing they do to spice it up with the da-da- da not a fan. Oh, let's not get Theo started on this classic national anthem adjustment rant.
You know I thought about this like a month ago I'm like, fuck I really gonna talk about
this on the show.
I could try to work out where we got put in and all that sort of stuff.
My brain just obviously opening a gaping hole in the tissue where the memory of doing that already on the podcast used to be. Yep. You have absolutely already done your national
anthem ring. If you know what episode that's in, please let me know. Yeah.
So instead we cross live on this pre-recorded podcast to Dutch
Dutch news, our premier source of news about the Dutch.
Google to ban Zwati Pete.
I choose to read this as Zwati, like Souti, you know.
Zwati Piet.
I mean, I think he is Souti Pete.
Yeah, that is that.
Dutch is funnier if you read it, if you read it like it's English.
Google to ban Zwati Pete's sui replacement as a quote,
racial stereotype.
Are they going to ban Svatt Pete's replacement?
Is he worse than Svatt Pete's?
Oh, no.
So it says here. Better or worse? Oh no.
So it says here,
Google is banning advertising in the run-up to the
Sinterclass festivities using Souti Peets as well as the traditional blackface version.
The company has confirmed to Dutch News.
What's Suttie Pete?
So... Is he not Blackface? He's just
Suddy? You've been in the chimney? You've met wife of the show, my wife, Elna. There are photos of
Elna in hospital, in Australia, being visited by Santa and the sooty peats. Really?
And that is people who put on blackface
and like a little Santa's helper outfit.
Because they're like a chimney sweep?
No, because this seems like a really weird way to get around.
They're meant to be black.
They're meant to be black face. I just have stood on my face.
Here's an interesting little twist in that. They're meant to be black. They're meant to be black face. I just have stood on my face.
Here's an interesting little twist in that.
So I'm just reading, traditionally Zwati Pit is black because he is a more from Spain.
That's right.
Those portraying Zwati Pied to usually put on black face and colorful Renaissance attire
in addition to curly wigs and bright red lipstick. Pretty cool, right?
No.
Oh.
So, so basically, I'm trying to figure out here from a little read of this.
So he's Santa's servant, basically a slave if you will. Oh, okay.
In 1850 the Amsterdam-based primary school teacher, Jan Schenckman, published the book
St. Nicholas and his servant in English. It's widely considered the first time a servant character
was included in a printed version of the St. Nicholas narrative. This servant is depicted as a page who appears
as a dark-skinned person wearing clothes associated with Moors. So yeah, basically they're
Santa's helpers or servants, if you like, who are black, who are moors from Spain.
Goodness can't see a single problem with this.
We should just give the Dutch a break.
Yep.
So, so yeah, those ones are also known as Black Peters.
Yep. So I think Southyte is meant to be the replacement
for the Black Peter, right? So Black Peter is the, this is a black guy who works
for Santa and I'm doing black face to represent that.
That's just a sooty guy that works for Santa. It's different.
So Sury Pete's, by contrast to show that they have climbed down the chimney to deliver
presents, are fast becoming the accepted alternative to the controversial blackface character and
have taken over as Sint Nicholas's companion in many Sinter-Class parades and on TV. So basically they said, oh, there's a problem with the blackface.
What if we had a different explanation for the black face?
What if we did the exact same one, but there was a different reason for his black face?
What if the law explained this?
I'm not taking the black face off, so what if we work out something?
Yeah, look, the black face part non-negotiable I can wait it put that off the table is a non-starter
let's talk let's talk solutions all right you just bring me problems like
black faces is the issue what solution mindsets here what if it's just a horrible little
gnome that had soot all over their face that made
him look like a black person?
But it's not, he's not black.
He's not black.
But he's not black, but he is absolutely covered in dark charcoal all over his face looks
like black face.
So the ban from Google means that companies will not be able to promote their goods using
Souti Pete's.
Fuck.
Tragedy.
Imagine that on the Coles catalog, you know?
Imagine a Woolworth's ad.
And there's Santa and he's like, oh, ho!
Aldi might still get it.
Yeah.
Don't bring Aldi into this.
Oh. Not all Europeans are created equal.
Aldi, look, in fairness to Aldi, Aldi do one type of advertising that I am aware of, which is the catalog.
And the catalog says, this is what we will be selling and here are pictures of it.
That's it. Get here before the store opens. Oh fuck off. Then I'm putting
any Curtis Stone or fucking Jamie Oliver in my face. And they wouldn't pay for that. They would
not pay for that. Souti Pete's. Oh my god. So, you are no longer able to promote goods using
Souti Pete's. And individuals will not be able to make money from Surrey Pete or traditional Pete videos on their YouTube channels.
Once again, YouTube creators robbed by the woke left.
You know how it's really hard to be right-wing on YouTube?
Oh right.
Continually victimized.
Oh boy. Oh boy. Quote,ized. So tough.
Oh boy.
Quote,
Google is committed to equality and diversity,
the company told Dutch News.
NL in a statement.
We have seen that some alternative forms of Black Pete
are still based on racial stereotypes.
While always taking context into account,
we have drawn a line to keep our policies applicable as consistently as possible. I assume that the policy is, please stop doing blackface.
Seems simple.
Seems pretty straightforward.
Dutch News.NL defensively asked Google to clarify which aspects of the city peat is based
on a racial stereotype, but the company failed to respond.
I mean I feel like it's quite simple. Yes, it's a, you took black guy out of the description of the character and the the th. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's the the the the the the the the the the the th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to thi. We have to be to be to be to be to be to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to be. It seems. It seems. It seems. It seems. It seems. It seems. It seems. It seems. It seems. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's the the the the the the the the the. We have. We have. We have the the the. We have the the. the. the the th respond. I mean I feel like it's quite simple. Yes it's a you took black guy
out of the description of the character and resubmitted him. You can't... You just
change the description. It's not even a palette swap, you know? It's just the same guy.
Souti Pete is Catholic now. palate swap, you know? It's just the same guy.
Souty Pete is Catholic now.
I know it may not seem obvious, but Sotty Pete is now circumcised.
Oh boy, Facebook's got Blackface all the way down his dick, except for the red tip.
Oh, they cover that in bright red lipstick.
Facebook said this summer that it would ban Blackface Peets from its social media channels as
part of a decision to bar content that includes, quote, implicit hate speech like Blackface
or anti-Semitic stereotypes on a global scale.
However, the platforms moderators are not taking action against the images directly
and will only intervene if alerted to photos and to to to the the to the the the the then then then then the and the and the and the and the and the and the and the and the and the and the and the and the and the and the of bright the and the and bright rede of bright rede of bright rede and bright the and bright and bright and the and bright the and the and bright the and bright the and the and bright the and the and bright the. the. the not taking action against the images directly and will only intervene if alerted to photos and videos which break the guidelines.
So we're going to need Dutch people to report Southi Pete's and I don't see that happening.
Oh boy.
Oh, that picture.
So this is...
So this is from the Guardian in September 2019, Dutch St. Nicholas Parade to replace Blackface
with Souti faces.
After years of debate and at times violent protest.
Black faces matter.
Oh, oh.
Wait, are they pro blackface protests?
I'm assuming yes?
You're going to be cancelled.
It's just a whole nother fucking world.
Oh, God damn.
They're on like a fucking 30 years ago wavelength.
Wow. Okay.
After at times violent protest, this year's Christmas season St. Nicholas
Parade in the Netherlands will not feature white people in blackface makeup, the public
broadcaster that organized the event has said, they said, very, very cleverly before announcing
the next thing. The Zwati Pithin, or Black Peets, who accompany Sinterklaus, in the annual
televised parade which
this year takes place in April.
On 16th of November.
This is Sinterklaus.
Oh, Papa, when will it be Sinterklaus call it?
You know, like, there's always like the hour after we do these podcasts where
maybe we've been too racist to the Dutch. And then the next story is just like, oh, oh, oh, oh, the, the, the, the, the, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. This, th. This, th. This, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, is, thi, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, they.a, is, is, is just, they.a, thi, thi, thi, thi, they after we do these podcasts, we're like, maybe we've been too racist to the Dutch. And then the next story is just like,
oh, there's just violent clashes of the street
because they don't want to stop doing black face.
In the Netherlands, when Sintoclaus comes
and puts a lump of coal in your stocking,
you cheer and start rubbing it on your face.
Oh, God damn.
All right, so the televised parade will instead have sooty faces, the broadcaster said, in
what it called a quote, logical next step.
Let's break that down for a second.
Uh, you don't want to go, you don't want to go cold turkey on the black face.
You really gotta...
People just freak out.
They won't know what's going on.
Just walking around, dazed and confused if they're looking at just Dutch faces.
Who is that standing next to Santa?
Get him away from there!
Last year, in response to growing protests by anti-racism
campaigners NTR introduced a mix of sooty and blackface peaton for the parade.
That's the kind of a girl. This is not. It could even go all the way to
to study peat. I really need to see what the distinction is between a sooty peat and a black face.
This is, this is not what we mean by wanting an integrated society. This is... It certainly is not. What if we would
simply have half sooty peats and half blackface peats? It said it respected
both tradition and change but felt it had to quote reflect changes in society. I assume
one of those changes is please stop doing blackface. Oh okay
so Theo's got a picture of a sooty peat here and it's the same mixed race?
It's the same. It's the same. Come on. It's the same guy except like it's like a
dime store blackface. It's lazy, lazy blackface. He's...
It's um, it's not Justin Trudeau blackface. It's like your local footy club blackface.
Oh boy. Zwalti Pete seemed to class as helper has traditionally been portrayed by adults wearing gaudy
costumes, large gold earrings, Afro-style wigs, red lipstick, and full blackface makeup.
A characterization, critics say, is a racist reference to slavery.
No, critics.
Is it critics or is it critics of blackface, no?
You know everyone's a critic. Is it just or is it... What are critics of black face, no? You know, everyone's a critic.
Is it just kind of a fact?
You know?
Many Dutch, however, strongly defend the traditional Pete.
Arguing that his face is black only because of soot from the many chimneys he has had
to climb down to bring presents to excited children on the 5th of December?
Excuse me? Record scratch?
That's the most perverted thing that we've stumbled on so far?
War on Christmas didn't know we're going to go there tonight.
Wow.
Disgusting.
Okay.
In recent years, the controversy has drawn protests and counter-protests,
sparking vandalism, violence, and even convictions for incitement to racial hatred.
In 2017, ZWati Pete's defenders blocked a motorway
to stop opponents reaching the parade,
and last year there were brawls, egg pelting,
and arrests in Eindhoven.
These motherfuckers love blackface.
They live for him.
Charlton Heston saying, you can pry my grease paint from my cold dead hands.
Today is a beautiful historic day, said Jerry Arifye of Kickout Zwati Pete, yes.
Who had been campaigning against Zwati Pete since 2008.
Damn, dude.
This is a victory for everyone who strives through an inclusive
parade that will delight all children. We want the tradition to continue for thousands
of years, but adapted to the times. Doing my Sinterklaus parade in the year 5,000.
He pledged to continue the fight against Swwardy Pete in Blackface until the figure had
disappeared completely.
Quote, the national arrival of Sinterklaus is the big one, but there are the local ones
he said.
We will fight for change.
Paul show support for the traditional Pete is strong but fading.
In 2013, 89% of Dutch favoured the blackface.
Look, I would love to be really judgmental, but how many people do you think in Australia want more
gollywogs? Or would at least say, hey, it's not a big deal.
Not a big deal. That's a problem.
I enjoy, and I'm using the word, enjoy ironically here, the fact that we haven't actually
really changed any minds about gollywogs, it's just that everyone that held that belief is
just slowly dying off.
Yeah, that's basically it.
We've had to just have new people.
No one's come around and been like, maybe. We we we we th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, th. th. th. th. th. th, th. th, th, th, th, th. th, th. th. th. th, th, th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to say, th. th. th. th. th. to to say, th. to to th. to to to say, to say, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to say, that, that, that, that, maybe. Maybe, we couldn't take the old people and be like, hey, that gollywog thing, not so great.
We gave up on that, we just waited for them to all die.
What are they going to do though?
Take the gollywogs off the shelf?
Yeah, wouldn't that be great?
You think that's easy?
You think these out of my country upshop. You think I can find another pattern to crochet?
I can't imagine being that enthusiastic about anything in my life, let alone like going to war
over my right to be in blackface.
You can be in blackface in your own home, by the way.
It's perfectly legal.
It's perfectly legal.
I'm trying to think what it would take if the government was like you can't have this anymore that would make me be like I'm ready to
fucking die for this cause. You know? It's like coronavirus but they if you
black up at home you have to put a mask on when you go out.
I'm gonna I'm gonna take like a hard left turn here and say I was
was looking at a thing online which was a very big
YouTube saying, hey Australia's really lost its way because they are putting in a
ban on like hentai and anime with depictions of children having sex in it.
Right, which as I understand has actually been that way for a while.
And also, cool.
Yeah.
It's not good for anyone.
There's no positive out of this.
I'm sure a lot of us have seen that tweet doing the rounds.
And apart from the fact that, like,
to me, there is no way of defending it. I think, I think people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people who who who were that that that that that that that that that that people people people people people people who were that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that, like, to me, there is no way of defending it.
I think people who were defending it like in a dishonest way were trying to conflate,
they were trying to say, hey, this will result in any anime that features a character who is a
child being banned.
And my understanding is that that is not correct. Instead it is,
anything that depicts any like, you know, hentai or anime or anything that depicts somebody
who is under the age of consent having sex or in a lot of cases in these fucking things
being abused in some way, you can't import that now. And fine. But there's no way to defend that without saying, hey I'm going to be mad if I can't get my hands on that stuff. that. that, that, that, that, that, that, th. th. th. th, that, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, any, any thi, any thi, any, any thi, any thi, any, any, any, anything, anything, anything, anything, anything, anything, anything, anything, anything, anything, anything, any thi, any thi, any thi, any any any thi, any any any any any any any thi, any, any, any, any thi, any, any thi, any thi, any thi, any thi, any thi, any, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi But there's no way to defend that without
saying, hey I'm going to be mad if I can't get my hands on that stuff anymore.
Yeah. And I thought it's not a good look. Well I thought the same thing Lucy
where I was just like if somebody said to me you can't watch Werner Herzog
movies anymore. Well like if somebody yeah, if somebody said, like, hey, I know you really enjoy Martin Scorsi movies,
but there's actually all this research that shows that when people watch those enough, they're
far more likely to go out and abuse a child, I would say, I think I can go without the
Martin Scorsizing movies.
Like I enjoyed them and everything.
You say that, but if I don't, if I can't on demand watch a man drag a boat over a mountain,
I feel like I am way more inclined to go and drag a boat over a mountain myself.
But, uh, but yeah, like you're saying, Lucy, I just...
I don't know what it would take for me to be like, you know? Damn, I gotta get out in the streets and throw a Molototototototototototototototototototototototototototototto to to to to to to to the to to to their to their to to to to their to to to to to to to to to to to to to watch on to watch on to to to watch on to watch on to watch on to watch on to watch on to watch on to watch on watch on watch on watch on watch on watch on watch on watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to watch to to to to to to to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their to their to their to to to to to to to to I don't know what it would take for me to be like, you know?
Damn, I gotta get out in the streets and throw a Molotov cocktail,
because I can't black up for the Sinterklaos Parade.
Right?
Damn, I gotta watch regular porn and just like, imagine that we're all related.
You know?
You know? You gotta watch the, I gotta watch, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the, the, the, the, th, the, th, th, th, th.... I, th. I, th. th. thr. thr. thr. tha. tha. tha.a. tha.a, tha. to, to, to, to, to, toobites of porn that just depicts people over the
age of 18 pretending to be in the same family.
Right.
Disgusting, too.
Oh boy.
Truly, truly.
Digging up my time capsule and there's just the...
Digging up my time capsule and wondering what's just the incest paedophilia like anime in there.
Oh, that's not allowed anymore.
Oh no.
Society has moved on from that.
God, imagine if there actually was less of that stuff in the future, you know, but instead,
now now we've just like, better extended the networks of information across the world
so that people can like advocate for the availability of this material basically.
People can organize pro-blackface protests more efficiently than ever before.
That's what we did for society. What do we think porn's gonna be like in 20 years, you know?
I don't want to know. We've crossed every frontier. It's done. I feel like we keep
bringing like new novelties to it like 3D or VR or whatever. That's true. And then we just get back
to the classics. And then we're like, you know what, wasn't that good? Yeah, we worked it out. We worked out what's good th th th ago. Yep, it's fine. I can even older.
I now think in order to keep sanity, you've got to stick with still photography.
These are my genuine beliefs.
I think that like porn video streaming sites, it's like...
It's like...
It's too much. Well, it's too much.
But like, um... um Theo have you ever seen
a woman try to find porn on one of those? Why are you asking this like I'm not
here? Well I don't think he's watched you try to find porn no certainly the
answer is no to both cases. Are women bad at finding porn is that all you're implying here?
Sorry sorry what I what I mean by that is it
makes it apparent very quickly that the majority of porn is not made for women.
Are you just like, are you just over their shoulder going like, well you can actually use
bullion operators here to narrow your search. Oh, you can just exclude the term throat if, uh, if that's a problem. You guys are like putting search to, right? Or maybe, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the, the, the th. the th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. to, to, to, to, to, to, to to to to to to to to to to to thi. thi. thi. thi. th term throat if that's a problem. You guys are like putting search to it?
Alright, or maybe you were right to say this, you know?
Yeah, yeah.
Much simpler, more streamlined experience for me.
Are you just hitting the front page? I'm just hitting the front page, you know?
Trending. What's in the zeitgeist? What's trending is fine?
Oh boy. I don't know. Look all I'll say is I think that generally speaking,
it keeps getting worse. Surely people are just trying to top everything all the time.
Everything's getting more gonzo. Yeah, it's like just relax everybody. Let's make a time capsule.
Let's make a time capsule and put some nice porn in there. You know?
Oh, imagine, imagine if you will, you're at your school and they say, hey, we're
digging up a 30-year-old time capsule. And everybody's like, whatever. And then, they dig it up,
and they start throwing out into the crowd of kids skin mags.
You know?
Mmm, that'd be really cool.
Be like, be like going right back to the 80s or the 90s when you could walk through
the woods and find a dirty magazine somebody discarded.
It means nothing to me.
My first experience of porn was a gif. A gif. Oh my god.
My, I think my first experience of like hardcore pornography was a VHS tape.
Um, that my brother said that one of his friends had. And he was like, I bet if you asked, he would let you see it.
And I asked the guy and he gave it to me.
I took it home and put it in the VCR, you know?
Clunk, clump.
Gotta rewind it first.
It's just on.
It's 12 minutes in.
Oh boy, well that's a different level of commitment, VHS porno, you know?
Yeah.
No, I definitely remember mine, was at my friend's place and he's like, oh, come check
out what my dad has in his drawers.
Cool. His dad's just got like his bedroom drawers.
So right next to their big stack of, big stack of penthouse.
Oh, cool. And as we have established on this podcast, that's the one where they show th th th the they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're the the they're the the to there is a big stack of big stack of penthouse. Oh cool. And as we have established on this podcast, that's the one where they show hole.
100% is. Afterwards, took me a while of like recalibration of magazines that we have in Australia.
I think it went too hard too early. Well, yeah, because I, you've given me another memory here, which was, um, so that was, I, that was, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th, th. th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. too hard too early. Well, yeah, because you've given me another memory here which was, um, so that was, I think,
in high school when I saw this VHS.
And that was the first time I had seen like actual sex happening, you know.
And I'm pretty happy that it took form in like somebody just saying, sure, you can borrow
this tape, and then I just got to go away and look at it and go,
huh?
Instead of what I imagined for a bunch of people,
it's like you're saying, Theo of like,
hey, look at this material I have found.
Let's all watch it together now.
You have to process it as part of a group.
Yeah. Which I think is interesting. But before that point... Sounds weird.
I can't say girls do this a lot.
Before that point in primary school, there was a guy that I was friends with who I didn't like.
You know those friends.
Uh-huh.
But his dad had a collection of like,
I want to say, 30 years worth of Playboy magazines in the garage.
Wow.
You know those like, kept them.
Yeah, like those magazine holder type, like, I don't know, those things that you would
put like a big ream of A4 paper in kind of thing, just shelves and shelves on the garage
wall of decades of every month of every year
of Playboy. And I stole many Playboys from that guy's house. And his dad was mad. But it's
right because I didn't like him. I love when we mention anything weirdly sexual, Andrews,
like, here is a pile of personal information about me that you might like to know.
Hey, well I don't have anything to do with this information anymore, so I might as well
just hand it out, like Halloween candy.
And it's not as though I can be blackmailed by someone knowing that I saw various issues
of Playboy from the 60s and 70s when I was 12 or whatever.
You're just like a horrible old urchin on the street, like, extra, extra!
Andrew's sexual awakenings.
Oh, that's it, folks, we're trying to get back to some classic soft-court or still pornography.
That's all we want.
That's right. A bit of a bit of use your imagination. A bit of air brushing.
You know, bought to you by that gentleman's gentleman.
What the fuck is his name, the Playboy man?
Hugh Heafna?
Hugh Heafna.
Thank you.
Who is either dead or died? ages ago didn't he? Filthy old fuck. He was died in 2017. He died in 2017 in his
horrible fucking herpes infested mansion. People catching shit in the grotto. No good.
What a horrible place that would be like on its backslide? Oh yeah. In the bad times.
Well I'm maintenance is going downhill. Well I think by the, I think towards yeah. Yeah, in the bad times. Well I'm maintenance is
going downhill. Well I think by the I think towards the end like the primary
use of the Playboy mansion was people renting it for like parties and stuff.
Oh renting it so you could have a party on the grounds of the Playboy
mansion. So you just be you just be in the grotto with just like some losers come. Yeah it would even be like this this this this this this this this this this this this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is th. th. th. th. th. th. I th th th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi thi thi towards towards towards tow. I tow. I tow. I tow. I tow. I tow. I tow. I tow. I tow. I towards towards towards towards tow. I tow. I tow. I tow. I tow. I tow. I tow. I tow tow towards towards towards to be to be to be to be to be like to be the towards the to to the th. to towards to towards to towards towards towards towards to towards towards to to towards the be in the grotto with just like some losers come. Yeah.
It would even be like Shack's come.
Yeah, I think this is Sylvester Stallone's come.
You know?
He also had like some, um,
I think he had some gross vibes as well with like, you know, all of his girlfriends.
Oh, you think?
I do. I genuinely do.
News flash, you have no, kind of gross.
Kind of gross.
No, well, the whole like having, having a group of girls
you younger than your daughters who live with you and trade, trade sex for access to your money,
I guess.
I don't think anyone's arguing on this one.
No, it just makes you think of Elna had been watching that documentary about Nexium.
Yeah, I gotta watch that.
We watch the one on Stan.
That's some wild shit to, especially when like,
I would recommend watching it. Like, obviously it has some very unpleasant stuff in it.
But the wild thing about it is it's basically like,
the cult itself is basically like,
Scientology by way of LinkedIn.
It sort of started as like a corporate retreat type thing.
And so all of the, like all of the bits of people doing talks and like courses and stuff
that they have footage of and everything that I heard it just made me think of like people's
LinkedIn posts.
Yeah, only slightly more perverted than the actual LinkedIn.
Yeah. Yep. And the guy who
was like the leader of the thing that all of these people like dedicated
themselves to and described as a genius. Absolute fucking tweb. Very perplexing to
look at and consider how people get themselves into those situations.
And that is the end of the podcast.
The abrupt...
That has been what Andrew is watching lately.
Sex Colts.
You have not.
Some porno Andrew has seen.
I don't remember the name of the porno or anything if you're wondering.
Some personal sexual awakening information and a recommendation for what Andrews been watching
recently. Do you remember what the gift was Lucy? Why would I remember what the
gift was? This was probably like the shortest gift ever and it was probably
saved onto the computer by my brother or something in like 2004? Did you, you didn't see it on
Tumbler or anything? No this is like way before Tumblr. It was like very young at the time. I was like th. And I th. And I th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Do the the thi. the the the. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. the the the the. thi. thi. thi anything? No, this is like way before Tumblr.
That was Geocity States.
That was like very young at the time and I was like,
this is like a video, but it's not a video.
Very short.
Just more shocked about the, you know, the file format than anything else.
It looks like there's only a hundred and twenty eight tw only 128 colors in this. Oh, my goodness.
Oh, as always, thank you for joining folks.
There's some information you didn't need.
Some you might have?
Do you think there was any information in this anyway that anybody needed?
That never is.
That's not our thing.
That's not what we're here for.
It's not what we're here for.
Well, thanks for your support guys.
That's it.
You didn't want to plug the patron or anything?
Well, I think the patron gets plugged by the little teasers that go in.
Oh, have we automated that?
Yes, in the sense that Ben edits them into the show. Okay. Great.
I've just noticed this now.
Yes, that is why I stopped saying things about the Patreon, because if you are listening
to this on the bonus feed and you have paid to not have the Patreon plug to you constantly.
You won't be hearing the ad, you'll just be hearing this conversation.
This conversation in which... I've realized we haven't been talking about the Patreon on the main episode. In which Theo suddenly comes to understand several months after this thing happened, that
it was happening.
I'm not really the guy that remembers to do things.
I assume everyone stops the podcast about five minutes ago and we're like, well, we're
about done now.
Let me say the first goodbye.
Yeah, as soon as I segue into the first porn, click.
They're like, all right, that's not enough.
All right, we're gonna hear some stuff from Andrews.
Just fade the audio out, you know?
You got, you need some music to start playing me off like, uh, like an Academy Award recipient.
Oh, I would love that every time you start describing the plot to a film, it's loudly
increasing the volume of the background music.
You just scripted to just cut off the podcast after one hour.
That's it.
Everything good that's going to happen has happened.
Bye everybody.
Bye.
Bye.