Boonta Vista - EPISODE 231: Dutch Watch Inferno
Episode Date: January 6, 2022We're back for another year, can you believe it. This week: We revisit the terrifying traditions of New Year's Eve in the Netherlands, the clones of the Queen (dead), and a rain of miracle fish in the... US. *** Support our show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista *** Email the show at mailbag@boontavista.com! Call in and leave us a question or a message on 1800-317-515 to be answered on the show! *** Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista Website: boontavista.com Merchandise: shop.boontavista.com/ Twitch: twitch.tv/boontavista
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hello and welcome to Buentevista, episode 231.
I am Ben and I am here at the Take Factory, giving myself a good 20 minutes to write an article
titled, Netflix original movies are bad, but here's why that's good actually.
With me is Lucy, who is plugging away furiously on a piece titled
Um, when are we going to talk about how toxic first-degree murder is? Hey Lucy. Hi. It's so important.
It is so important. And no one is talking about it. No one is talking about it and why aren't we
talking about? I wish this wasn't anywhere near what my actual jobs have been in my life. I don't like how close to home this is.
Certainly not like any of us have had to do this professionally, occasionally for years
at a time.
Yeah, not at all.
Ah, but it's important.
And that's what's so important about it is how important it is.
Also where this is Theo, who is putting together the finishing touches on a sprawling opus titled, If You Don't Stand the as yet unreleased 2023 sequel to Captain Marvel,
I'll come to your house and stick my fist down your throat,
rip your heart out and a fit of righteous blood first.
Yeah. And here's why that's so important right now.
Yeah. People are hurting. We're more divided than ever.
Despite the efforts of Joe Biden and Camilla Harris, who is, thly, thly, thly, thly, thly, th, th, th, th, th, th, the th, th, th, thi, the thi, despite the efforts of Joe Biden and Camilla Harris, who is honestly, Slay Queen.
And that's so important right now to consider, but I feel like the Marvel movies haven't really
been given the proper consideration in the public eye.
No one's giving them a chance. No one's given them the time of day. Yeah.'s giving, no one's giving them a chance.
No one's giving them the time of day.
Yeah.
Yeah, and no one's talking about that either.
What you're saying right now is everything.
It's, you guys feeling that?
It's everything and it's, it's so important right now, and here's why it's everything.
Yeah. I reckon it be great to write an article that says we need to talk about how toxic it
is to call people out for not talking about things.
Mm.
Because that's low-key and ADHD symptom.
Well, some people might have trauma and they don't want to talk about it, you know?
Yeah.
That's true. They could be they could be thinking, spending a lot of th of thi tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the thi. the. the. the. the. the. the. theate. theate. theate. theate. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. to. to. to talk about it, you know? Yeah, that's true. They could be they could be spending a lot of time just going over and over in their head about the
the contentious press tour for Captain Marvel 1, you know, they don't want to
relive that. They don't want to talk about that. Was there a contentious press tour? Yes. Okay. Okay. All right. There was a lot of a lot of. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their. the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. to. to. to. tou. tou. te. tou. te. tou. tou. te. tou. tou. the. the. the. think it was one of those things where everyone was like,
hey, you're just hating on this movie because Brie Larson is the first female superhero.
Yeah.
And people were like, no, we just find Brie Larson really unlikable.
No, the first female superhero was Hallie Berry and Catwoman.
That is so true.
And no one's talking about it. And it's sexist if you didn't like
that movie. That's true. I'm just going to say it. Unpopular opinion. The basketball dance scene
in Harleyberry's catwoman is everything. The Maravangian is in it and that means it's good. It's
my, I rate this movie one Maravigian out of a potential one merrivigidians or, God imagine a movie
that had more than one.
Lastly, also with us is Andrew, who was trying to use his office chair to smash the
window of his fifth floor office so I can throw himself out of it.
Hey, Andrew.
Hey, what's going on?
They really, um, they build these things to last these days, hey? Yeah, I think the problem is that they're spending more money on the glass and less money
on the chairs.
Like back in the 70s, if you wanted to kill yourself when the stock market crashed, you would
pick up your big, like chester field, armchair.
You know, you got the leather, you got the look at the chair and the window would explode. Oh and now you've got you know you got flimsy IKEA chairs made out a
recycled material you know very easy to pick up and move around but you are not
getting anywhere with these and I've tried about 19 different chairs in the
office. That's because of Reaganomics like since the 60s spending on windows
strength has separated from the 60s spending on Windows strength has separated
from the spending on office chairs and here's a handy little graph that not a
lot of people talking about and here's why. Yeah it's good I was just about to
ask why they aren't talking about. Oh well if I can't kill myself, I can at least approach my work differently.
You know what they say, New Year, New Me.
Yeah.
My wife...
They do say New Year, New Andrew all the time.
My wife used that expression to trick one of our kids into eating something that she
had previously said she didn't work.
And it worked? And while we're...
It absolutely worked.
While we're derailing this segue,
speaking of not killing yourself and finding new ways to work,
a quick shout out to our sponsors at Lassian.
Yes, the newest version of Jira has more features than a kitchen sink.
We'll have your project managers buzzing with built-in plugins from Grammally.
You'll never make a faux par, so on and so forth.
And we'll cut down on slack.
And we're going to...
And the confluence.
Yeah. And then...
Tasks.
Thanks, Atlassian.
At the start, did we say this was pro or anti-killing ourselves?
I don't think we've drawn a bead on that one yet.
That is yet to be decided.
All right, well, let's leave that to the end of the show if we can...
We're disdust that with our advertisers in terms of what the good they are I'm dragging a little ticket into the trellow column in progress. Oh, I'm sorry, we're sponsored by Atlassian in this episode.
We can't actually mention Trello because it's Competitor Project to Jira.
No, Trello.
They bought it.
They bought Trello.
Did you not read the media package?
Sorry, no, I've been out of the loop for a couple of years. We'll circle back on on this. They purchased Trello which means that
Atlassian and their products Gera and Confluence are better than ever. Yeah.
Well the good news is they have developed plugins that do make you want to kill
yourself but they've also developed plugins to make you want to kill
yourself less and both of those are available for a subscription fee. You just figure out, you know, what's right for you.
Yep, New Year, new me, I'm gonna, I'm just gonna do things differently this year.
You'll switch it up.
I'm gonna, I'm not going back to the well on anything, you know, I'm not making the same jokes. That wells bone dry
I'm putting the bucket down. It's coming back up dust Nothing but dust in there. And my kids don't want to drink it
Yep, not returning to that well again, but first for the new year. We're just going to do a little segment. I'm checking the notes here. I think it's new. I think this is a new segment. That's right. Yeah, okay. that. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. thi. thi. thi. thu thu things. things things things things things things things things thuooooooooo thuooooooooooo thu. thu. thu. th. th., I think it's new? I think this segment's new? Yeah, I think this is a new segment, that's right. Yeah, okay. It looks new. Okay. Well, that's great. In that case, let's check out
this brand new segment called Netherlands Corner. Everybody, I'm from Holland. Isn't that beer? It is. Yes. Yes. So, like we've kind of talked in the past before about the fun loving people of the Netherlands
and some of the ways in which...
The Danish people.
Yep.
And how they like to celebrate.
And you know, all cultures are different.
Like for example, Lucy, what did you do on New Year's Eve?
I went to bed at 11 o'clock because I was really unwell because I thought I had the coronavirus.
Great. That's our culture. That's Australia. That's our culture. That's Australia. That's our culture.
Yep. I also, I missed the, uh, I missed the chiming of the clock at 12 on account of the fact that I was playing
a rhythm game on my phone.
Yeah.
Did you manage not to come?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I, uh, I got one over on them because I lasted four minutes.
So, you know, I'm gonna write in and see if I can get some kind of voucher or something
like that.
Sir, sir.
So, you know, we all do things in different ways and this country celebrates a little differently.
Usually by, I guess having some kind of riot.
Yeah, we've, so we covered this initially in the episode, Battlefield Erk. And feel free to revisit that if you th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th this initially in the episode, Battlefield Erk.
And feel free to revisit that if you need some extra context, but I think you'll sort of figure out what's going on as we go through these next three stories here.
Now this is from a classic and wonderfully reputable source of news, Dutch news.
NL.
Wouldn't get it from anywhere else.
No.
Try not to.
Sometimes it happens, we all get pretty upset.
We don't like it.
We shake our fists, we curse the people typing that stuff up for, what's the other side?
Oh, I'd hate to even say its name, but Dutch review.
The one other source of news in the netblins.
It should be just a page that says says is says says says says. I have actually the next two stories from two different Dutch
English language news outlets but that's either here or there I wouldn't, yeah.
Oh well you the listener can compare and contrast and decide you know where you
would rather get your Dutch news from. I'd rather get it from Dutch news.
New year celebrations were busy but did not get really out of hand, police chief says.
Now to me, that sounds fine.
That sounds like nothing noteworthy.
It sounds like a whole bunch of people going to bed at 11 p.m. because they thought
they might have the novel coronavirus. Classic New Year's tradition, that's right.
Yeah, that's what New Year Celebration is not getting out of hand sound like
to me. Let's check it out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out of hand sound like to me. Let's check it out.
The Netherlands saw in the New Year with rockets, firecrackers, and street parties,
despite the ban on most fireworks and on large gatherings.
Okay, so they got a couple of bits wrong now, but...
Um, hmm.
Police said on Saturday morning it had been a, quote, busy night, which was, quote, only kept under control by the use of considerable police capacity.
According to the telegraph, that's a lot of A's. A lot of A's in there, yeah.
There were more call outs of the emergency services than in 2020.
Now as we go ahead, I would just like, uh, both you, my colleagues and the listener
to keep the phrase kept under control in mind as this, as this goes on. Just remember that they categorize this
as being kept under control.
Just if you can conjure up in your mind,
if you can enter into your mind palace,
sit down in the lazy boy brand recliner
that you have in there.
Which is such good quality. Oh, it feels great.
Oh, Corinthian leather, it feels like you're in a cloud, you know?
I feel like I just won the jackpot on sale of the century.
You know?
And of course these days you don't even have to pull the lever yourself.
There's a little button.
It's motorized.
It's coming right.
I don't have a motor in my chair.
No, it's, you know, motors break.
Electronics, lever action. That's all I'm asking. I think last year for her birthday maybe,
I bought a wife of the show, my wife, Elna,
a Frank Green water bottle,
you know, it's like very cylindrical ones.
Nice, nice like metal water bottle
with a ceramic lining on the inside,
so you can put in some stuff and ice stays really cool for ages,
very nice color and everything. We went the the and they have the motorized recliners and everything.
And at the end of the movie, Elna was putting her down and it was sort of near the bottom
and she was like, oh, won't go all the way down?
Why won't it go all the way down?
And her water bottle had fallen out of her bag and become sandwiched in between and
was crushed by the Hoyts motorized recliner so maybe Ben's onto something there.
Yeah, but hey it's your mind palace, you know decorated how you want. Yeah.
Maybe Ben's got a hammock in his. I love a hammock. He would. He would have that.
Hammocks are great. They're the best
of both worlds. Lying down and falling off things.
I guess being trapped. What if you had a hammock but like a sushi train going by and the
sushi train has cold beers on it. This is what you picture in Ben's mind fella. I mean it could just be like an Eski that has some beers and oh you're right the sushi train. S ss. S ss. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. the the the the the the the the th. S. S. S. S. S. S. the the th. th. S. th. th. the th. th. they're th. th. th. th. th. th. They's th. They's th. They's. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. the. the. the. te. the. te. the. the. the. the. th. th. th. palace. I mean it could just be like an Eski that has some beers and, oh, you're right, the sushi
train is a better option, because then you're just like, whoop, oh, I'm just gonna, who
whoop? Yep.
Different kinds of beers on there?
Yeah.
You got your 4X.
You got your, uh, 5X.
So on and so on and so forth. You are in your mind palace, you are in your lazy boy, Bram McLain, or possibly your hammock, you are in whatever mode of comfortable seating,
you envisage when you go in there.
And now you're going to draw up the image
in your mind's eye of your mind palace
of a party that you would consider to be under control.
Mm-hmm.
That's right.
Mm-hmm.
As every year, riot police were drafted in to deal with disturbances and to protect
ambulance workers and firefighters, particularly in the more rural parts of the country.
As every year.
As is traditional.
The traditional riot police were in action for several hours to break up groups of youths
throwing fireworks.
In the Drenthe village of Bovensmild,
riot police were in action for several hours to break up
groups of youths throwing fireworks. There were similar incidents in at least
five villages in Friesland including Bordard where tear gas was used. Yep. And in Zumarum
and Colima's Wag. In Grun, four people were arrested for throwing
fireworks at emergency service workers. Don't do that. Probably just like don't.
Don't tear gas people either, but don't. Yeah. Don't throw stuff at the
ambulance workers, they're nature's angels.
I mean paramedics and firefighters alone.
You say that as though you think this party's out of control,
but it goes on to say there were only 13 arrests in total in the three northern provinces.
And that sounds pretty...
That's... I sure.
You know?
Hmm.
Remember the last party you were at where there were only 13 arrests? So that's, you that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thus, thus, thus, thus, their thi, their their tho, tho, thoomoome, thoomo, th, th, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, the their their their their their their their their their their their their the last party you were at where there were only 13 arrests?
Mmm.
So, that's under control right there.
In Nord Holland, police said there had been 32 arrests, including 17 arson and illegal fireworks.
Arson.
thein arson arrests.
That's right.
Just a casual evening. In Amsterdam, a crowd of some 3 to 4,000 had gathered on the dam in the city centre to celebrate
the New Year and riot police were drafted in to clear the area.
Oy, o', o'e, o'e, o'e, o'e.
Just busting skulls.
Local broadcaster, AT5 said riot police were also bought in Amstornam New West. Elsewhere, cars were set on fire in Rotterdam, their their their tham, and in tham, and in tham, and in tham, and in tham, and in tham, and in tham, and in tham, and in tham, and in tham, and in tham, and in tham, and in tham, and in to restore order in Amsterdam, New West. Elsewhere, cars were set on fire in Rotterdam Utrecht and the Hague, and in Rotterdam,
gangs of youth through fireworks of police as they tried to put out a blaze at a school.
Throwing fireworks at police, funny.
Can we assign a good or bad to that sentence?
Can we give that one more time, Edgy? Gangs of youths.
And we'll try and work out whether it's good or bad.
Let's diagram this.
Gangs of youths.
Gangs, not great, youths, good.
Great.
Yeah.
Through fireworks.
Great.
Yeah.
that's fun.
Very good.
Bad. Bad. At a school.
Not great. Not ideal. Why are the police putting out the blaze? Yeah, that was their first mistake.
That's a firefighters job. They're fucked up. The police were probably just trying to tase the fire until it went away. So maybe this was a critique. Maybe the youths were saying, hey, that's not how you put out of fire,
you corrupt pigs.
Is what we think of the structural use of state violence against emergencies,
et cetera, et cetera.
Yeah.
While hurling a big boy M52.
What's that famous saying?
Hurled fireworks are the voice of the voiceless?
I'm always saying.
Yes, yeah, that's the saying, yes.
There are also a number of arrests in Arnemuddin, in Zealand after groups of youth started setting fires, as one does.
Oh, when you're young.
Oh, to be young and setting fires again.
I'm going to be back in Annamu Eden in Zealand, setting fires.
Oh, everybody just has all those stories of when they were young,
running through the streets with their friends on New Year's Eve,
throwing bricks at the police and setting fires in schools.
Kerisine in one hand, matches inthe other, and joy in your heart.
Truly beautiful stuff.
Hmm. Police Chief William Wilders said every attack on emergency service workers was to be regretted.
Quote, but our preparations over the last few months have enabled us to be there on time if there were problems.
Thanks to this, Nome did the situation really
get out of the fan.
Just a different culture too.
You know, and that's not bad. You know, differences aren't inherently bad. No, that's
true.
But they are.
They are different.
Oh.
Oh.
Buntavista, the podcast for Moral Absolutism.
That's right.
So, again, I, like, I'm enjoying this as sort of, I guess an exercise in, you know, like, just media
management. It's all about, isn't it all about perception, you know?
It's not a PR person to write this, only 13 or is? This is a good night. If the head of police had come out and said
this is actually very fucked up people would realize that it's very fucked up.
Yeah, but instead this is how he addresses it right. Check it out.
And this is like you got to be like me, you got to be an old head, a savvy media operated to really pick up what's happening
here.
So everybody, listen carefully and see if you can figure out the rhetorical trick that he's
playing to let everybody know it's all on the control.
Despite the ban on fireworks and the large number of seizures in recent weeks, a surprisingly
large amount of fireworks was set off, he said. Quote, cars were also to the the the police the police the police the police the police the police the police the police the police the police the police the police the police. the police the police the police the police. the police the police the police. the police the police. the police th, th, th, th, th. thi, thi, thi, th. the, to to to to to to to listen, listen, listen, listen, listen, listen, listen, listen. to listen, listen. to listen, listen. to listen. to listen. to listen. to listen, listen. to listen. to listen. to listen, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. thi, you. thi, you the, you've the, you've to to to to you've to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the, the, fireworks was set off, he said. Quote, cars were also set on fire nationwide and the police broke up illegal parties all
over the country.
But this did not lead to major problems.
So that's very interesting because what he's done there is these tricked us.
He's bamboozled us with semantics by implying the cars being set on fire and riot police breaking up parties aren't a problem. If they hadn't been dealt
with, they could have led to problems but they're not problems in themselves.
We're talking like one flashing star on the GTA rating here. Yeah, yeah.
And you're outside the bubble of the police that are trying to pursue you.
Nobody stole a tank from the military depot to to to to to to to the to the to the the to the to from the military depot. No, no one drove it around the roads, kind of firing the tank gun backwards to make the drive faster.
No one managed to hop a car over the river to put you into one of the areas you hadn't unlocked yet, immediately getting five stars.
Not a single Dutch you spawned an Apache attack helicopter.
This has been a very good New Year's. Zero kill Frenchies best year ever.
I think as well you know because he's clearly a crafty, a crafty type. He's even left himself a
bit of wiggle room here you know where if somebody let's say somebody puts their hand up in the press
gallery and they say uh are you saying the cars being set on fire all over the country aren't problems?
And he could say, hey, I didn't say they weren't problems.
I just said they hadn't led to major problems.
You don't want to see major problems.
You know?
True.
I kind of do it this stage. I should have seen this one coming.
From my son's, Rotterdam's specialist eye hospital.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I liked it how it was structured better in the other article the first time we did this,
where they just randomly included a quote from an eye specialist without contextualizing why he was involved
whatsoever. But like you know we used to be able to get fireworks in camera you
used to be able to get him like on the Queen's birthday and stuff like that.
That old bitch loves fireworks. Yeah loved so she's loved. She's dead.
Rest herself blew herself up with her. Big boy M52. She's playing with fireworks and hell now.
And of course the thing everybody says is, oh you'll it'll blow up in your hand and you'll take a finger off or lose an eye or something.
And they must have a lot of specialist eye hospitals in the Netherlands I think.
Do you think they've got like, non-lethal organ donors for the Queen?
So if she does like, you know, hold on to a firework too long and lose a few fingers, they've got
a compatible hand right away?
And yeah, guy lifts the cleaver, the subject, you know, victim or don't or whatever you want
to call it says for king and country, etc.
Well actually it's funny that you say that, but shortly after we cloned Dolly the Sheep, they
use the exact same technology to make a bunch of identical queens that they keep in a basement.
So she blows a hand off, they go down to the best hands.
She'll never die. Yeah. Sort of a queen of thecisus situation. Yeah, if you
use the off-cut pieces of the original queen to build a new queen, which one's the real
queen? Probably the one that still has all the figures. Yeah. Also because of the cloning
process you can really tell from the way it talks which one is not the original queen. There are a few things that don't really translate. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the their. their. their. She. She. She. their. She. She. their. th. their. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. th. th. their. their. their. the. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. their. their. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So, the. the. the. the. the. the. So. So. So, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. tell from the way it talks which one is not the original queen. There are a few things that don't really translate.
How often is she talking? She's just showing up to things and doing a little wave.
She's why having those replacement hands is so important.
As long as they have a line of eyeballs before the gathering.
Just using like the rubber at the end of a pencil to get some tracks to to get so to get so to get so to get to get the the their to get their their their their their their their big part of the reason that they're not doing any of those like social things
at the moment is they're just busy at the moment having like a multiplicity situation in
Buckingham Palace.
Yeah, there's like the sort of the normal queen that they clone the other queens off.
There's the horny one there's the genius queen. That's the one to watch out for.
I'm still on the horny queen.
I'm thinking about the horny queen.
Yeah.
Can't, they took her out once and she was just like aggressively horny and they just were like,
nah, gottta gotta new queen.
She's out there getting railed by Mr. Bean. We gotta get this one some new fingers, you know? Rotterdam's specialist eye hospital had dealt with three cases by Saturday morning
compared with 10 to 15 in a normal year.
None of the patients were seriously injured, but they were in an eye hospital.
Yeah, but it wasn't a serious injury.
Do we have those? They have an entire hospital that's just for eyes.
I actually, um, something of an expert in this, thanks to the time, George fucked their eye up
very bad and I've spent a lot of time around Queensland's finest eye experts and there's
no standalone eye hospital that we visited.
I just went to a lot of eye departments.
Wow. It's nice that it got their own... I think. I think that's jaw and
stuff. Oh it is, yeah, no it was next to the maxillofacial. Yeah, but it's nice they've
got their own department whereas like ear, nose and throat all have to cram into
the same. All together. That's rough. Just the most horrible building full of spot them. Yeah it sucks when you go into the office the office the office the office the the the the the the the the th. the the th. the the th. the th. the th. th. th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's tho. I's tho. I's th. I's tho. I's th. I'm tho. I's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I've th. I've the. I've tho. I've tho. I've tho. I've tho. I's tho. I's thoo. I's thorough. I's thorough. I's that when you go into the office and you're like, I've got a problem with
my throat and the first doctor gets up and he comes over and says, oh, let me have a look.
And then you're like, also there's something with my ear and the other guy who's just
been sitting in the corner very sullingly, he goes, you got an ear thing.
You got an ear thing? I'm up. I'm the ear guy. I don't know if they need to make three doctors share a single office Like in every department, but they do and I think it's rough, you know
Yeah, well, they don't call it ear nose or throat
That's right
You get them all. You get them all. Yeah, you get them all. It's sort of package deal. Ear nose and throat. they have the to look. they. they. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. tho. the. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. throat, we have the capacity to look at all of them. Doesn't matter if you don't have anything wrong with it. Just let him have a look.
He's got nothing to do in there all day, you know?
It's just like how that doctor will look at your ob and your gin.
Mm-hmm.
Your jine?
That's what the gyy, in they, ty, that's what they, I don't mind him looking, I don't mind him looking at my ob but I'm very shy about my
magine.
Yeah.
Some people were injured by fireworks.
You just told us about a bunch of people getting their eyes fucked up.
RTV Ryan LeMond said a man had lost a hand when a firework blew up.
Didn't get out of control back.
Nothing serious.
Nothing serious.
No big deal though.
I can't even, physically, what does that look like?
Firework goes off in your hand, Kapow.
And there's just, you know, holding up the two bones at the end and some smoke,
like whisping off?
And you look like young Einstein.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then you take a brief moment to thank the universe for giving you natural black face
for free. And then you observe what's left of your hand and then you curse the heavens,
I guess.
Uh, and another man received a serious foot injury after a firework rolled toward
him.
That's a shame.
The complete injury figures will be published on Wednesday broadcast RTL news.
News.
New-yes.
Yeah.
Apparently that's the Dutch way of writing news.
N-I-E-U-W-S.
Just putting about... News. Three or four extra syllables in there.
News!
So, that's one story.
Sounds like, I'm sure it was calm around the rest of the country, though, right?
Oh, absolutely, yeah.
I mean, like the police chief did say, no major problems.
Just a lost hand, a bunch of eye injuries, the foot thing, all the car fires, the assaulting
the police and the ambulance guys and the firemen, but nothing major.
So let's just make sure that everything's all right across the country.
This is from the Dutch news agency,
Algamin Netherlands Perse Bureau.
Netherlands rings in 2022.
Good?
With fires throughout the country.
Oh, man.
Reports of fires came in across the country on New Year's Eve,
including many car fires.
Cars went up in flames in Amsterdam, Rotterdam, the Hague, Amos Fort, Hardwick,
Vienand Dal and Bannert, among others.
You know, those are just some of the places with flaming cars.
That's a lot of car fires, huh?
It's got a little bit of that passive um, a little bit of that passive language
they do when the police shoot people. Yeah, cars went up in flames.
Sometimes cars just do that. Sometimes cars just do that on their own.
Especially Tesla's, am I right? I was going to ask if they're a big Tesla market.
15 homes in Os, in Nord Brabant had to be evacuated after a fire broke out in
a gas distribution station.
Oh Jesus.
On the Bergumseewig.
A spokesperson for the fire brigade said that the fire is, quote, burning in a controlled
manner.
Right now all the fires over there in the gas distribution center.
It's largely confined to the gas which is spreading, but it's still where the gas distribution center. It's largely confined to the gas, which is spreading,
but it's still where the gas is.
As long as that doesn't spread any further
from the gas distribution center, we'll be okay.
Oh, that 400 meter high fire is burning very evenly.
So the fire is burning in a controlled manner
as the power company tries to shut off the gas to extinguish the fire.
That will probably be possible without people in Aus running out of gas, said the spokesperson.
The police suspect arson.
One of those bloody arsones from the last story.
A neighborhood center caught fire in the Newt Holland town of Uthorn.
The fire brigade received the report around 10 p.m and managed to get the fire under the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire gas received the report around 10 p.m. and managed to get the fire under control with a lot of equipment.
Editorializing there. Yep. A lot of equipment by whose standards?
Yeah, what's, what's the extra stuff?
Oh, that's what you think is a lot of equipment?
Cute. I thought you'd just have a bucket. More than a car fire fire, than, than, than, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, thoom-a, the thi, thi, the the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire the fire, the fire, the fire. A the fire, the fire. A, the fire. A, the fire. A, the fire. A, the fire. A, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. A tho, thoooooooooooooooooooooooom. A thea. A thea. A thea. A thea. A that, that, More than a car fire, less than a gas distribution center fire.
Yeah, but Goldilocks side.
The fire was extinguished by around 1230 a.m.
The damage is significant.
But all the...
Significant?
It's probably not a problem somehow, you know?
It's also under control. Yeah.
I think those local kids
are going to have to have some kind of blackface competition to save the wrecks.
In April Doom, a fire broke out on a house's balcony on one-year warm and sewage on New Year's Eve.
Two residents were injured and had to be taken to the hospital. According local media, the fire was caused by fireworks on the balcony. So, that's just a good th th th th th th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that that that that th. th. th. th. that, that, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. the. the. the. th. to be taken to the hospital. According local media, the fire was caused by fireworks on the balcony.
So, I'm not...
Now that's just a good time.
We, but we don't hear this shit out of America and I don't know if it's a like a reporting
difference or something or whether the Dutch are just really bad at using fireworks.
I think, yeah.
I feel like I've maybe mentioned this on the show on the show on the show on the show on the show on the show on the show on the show on the show on the show on the show on the show on the show on the show the show the show the show the show the show the show the show before, but friend of the show, LA Times reporter Matt Pierce,
every July 4th goes on a huge retweeting spree
of people posting videos and photos of all the palm trees
set on fire in LA for people letting off fireworks.
Like people are quite bad at it over there as well.
I think the difference here is that people set cars on fire on purpose, not with fireworks, they just set cars on fire.
Yeah, but I think we need to divide this issue into two buckets here, which
would be arson and accidentally blowing your hand off and holding up two bones,
sort of a little whisper of smoke comes out of it. I think that the prohibition stance on this obviously isn't working.
I think they maybe just need to do some like education road shows or something.
You know, step one, light the fireworks. Step two, throw out of distance.
Make sure you know where you're going to throw the fireworks first. And don't just like run around the house going, oh God, oh God, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the the the the the the the the the the the th, th, th, th, th, tho, tho, tho, tho, the the the the tho, tho, tho, tho, thoom. tho, the prohibition, the prohibition, the prohibition, the prohibition, the prohibition, the prohibition, the prohibition, the prohibition, the prohibition, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, the tho, tho, tho, the tho, tho, tho, the tho, tho, tho, thoooooo, thoooooooooooo, tho, th to throw the fireworks first and don't just like run around the house going
Oh God oh God like holding it above your head like Batman like Batman before you throw it into the baby's cot.
Yeah at no point should you lie to firework hold it in your hand look at it and go
Yeah, yeah especially don't look at the firework
consider your options and then consider that you're the only option that you have is to swallow the fire w w w w w w w w.???????? the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. to to to thi. to the the their their their their their their their to the the to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their. their their their their their their their their thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo tooom-goo too too too too too too toe. toe. toe. the and then consider that you're, the only option that you have is to swallow the firework, thereby snuffing it in your stomach.
And then you do a big, a big burb and a fireball comes out and you say, um, that was a spicy,
mama ma'amia.
Yeah.
Don't do that is what we do. If you are sitting on your toilet and maybe you're sitting on your toilet and maybe you're
halfway through taking a shit, I don't know what you ate.
Who listens?
No one's listening to podcasts on the toilet.
Oh, come on.
No, I'm saying if you're a Dutch person on New Year's Eve, then you're listening to
this other to toilet.
You're sitting on the toilet. You're sitting sitting on, you, you, you, you, you, you're listening, you, you, you're listening, you're sitting, you're sitting, you're sitting, you, you're sitting, you're sitting, you're sitting, you're sitting, you're listening, the the the the the the the the the the thoom, you're listening, you're listening, no, no, listening, the the to, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. No, th. th. No. No, no, no. No. No. No. No, no. No. No, no. No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, toilet, you have the door locked, you maybe halfway through your business, not the perfect time to light your firework.
It would cover the smell somewhat though.
Well yeah, but like then you're going to see that fuse burning and you're suddenly going
to be like, ooh, am I, am I done?
Am I done, is this going to be, will I just start wiping? Don't try multitask. No, no. And also, don't do your fireworks on the balcony.
Don't do your fireworks on the balcony.
Yeah, but that would be fun.
I mean, like, let's not, you know, it's not pretend that it wouldn't be dope to just be like
drunk on your balcony, hurling fireworks off it.
I was having a conversation with a guy at a barbecue a little while ago, where I was at a friend's
house and we were talking about the actual barbecue itself where it had like it had originally
been his years ago and then he had moved to a small place and given it to someone else and
it had arrived back at this house. And he was talking about how they had lived in an apartment
and he was like, they were like, they were kind of right a barbecue on the balcony or was going to get a barbecue on the balcony.
And they was like, eh, you know, we're kind of right here and all the smoke is just going
to go like under our balcony and then straight up into the like windows of the people above us and
everything.
That's what I'm doing right now with my little baby Weber.
But the apartment above me is currently four rent. There's no one in there. So I'm just like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like the the the the the the the their, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,there's no one in there, so I'm just doing it while I can, loving it.
Smoking out that empty apartment, they try to read it out.
And once they're moving, you just wheel it inside.
Yes, yeah, right there in the kitchen.
Yeah. I guess my point is there are some things, maybe some activities aren't perfectly suited to doing to do the apartment, the apartment, the apartment, the apartment, the, the, the, the, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, the, and, and, and, the, and, the, and, the, and, and, the, the, and, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, and the, the, and the, the, the, they. And, the, they. And, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, these people had the ones that have kind of a flat base.
And I think you stick in it and you light it and then you stand back?
That's what I pictured here.
Then you just lead for it.
I think the Netherlands just got jackass the movie.
Oh.
Oh, the very first one.
They got jackass. The very first one. They got Jek I asked. There are seven A's in there.
Yeah, Yagays. And they're big Stevo fans. Yeah. You know? There's dozens of ordinary Dutch people.
Well, you know, as ordinary as you can be, sticking fireworks up their butt holes.
Yeah, being like, this is pretty funny. And then going straight to hospital.
A building on Hofflan in Leiden went up in flames shortly after midnight.
According to Omrupp West, it's an empty school building that was used as a community center.
They'll burn down these community centers.
God damn.
Stop doing that.
It's like, they got some real purge vibes going for their New Year's thing, don't they?
Yeah.
Like, if it's New Year's and you're just hearing explosion after explosion and there's
like a car on fire in the street outside your house and you can see the local school burning,
like, I just don't get big party vibes from that. But hey, it's a different
culture. You were playing a rhythm game on your phone. Yeah, I wouldn't have seen it. You
know. The building burned down in a controlled manner. Hey, that problem took care of itself.
Thank God. No major issues. Nothing to report. Over in Nour Brabant, two scrap
cars were set on fire at the intersection of Van Wombstrat and Van de Lustrat. Of course. Oh, it's a victimless
crime. When they say scrap car, like I'm assuming this is some kind of translation Ben.
No, that's, they just mean it's like a car that would have been scrapped otherwise.
Making a scrap, that sounds like fun.
This is something that they do.
So this is a cultural thing of, like in some places of you, communities will sort of
get a car that was going to be trashed or whatever anyway and then they set it on fire as a festive celebration. Right, so kind of like a bonfire but instead of using like old bits of wood and broken
old wooden chair that you don't want anymore, you push a car into a intersection and you
set it on fire.
You take a tiny green three-wheeled car, fill it up with three liters of petrol, which is the maximum it takes and then top it off the fire. You don't put it th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. the thrash, the, the, like tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho the, like th. th. th. th. th. th. the, the, the, the, thr. thr. thr. th. thr. th. th. Like like like like like like like like like like like like, thr. Like, thr. thr. thr. thr. thr. thr. thrash, thrash, thrash, thrash, thrash, thrash, thrown, thrown, thrown, throwne. thrash, thr which is the maximum it takes and then top it off at a fire.
You don't put it in the tank though, you just spray it directly in through the window.
And then you lock the doors from the outside so Mr Bean is trapped in there.
Oh no that's right we've discussed this. It's his enemy that has his enemy in there. He has a mini. He has a mini. He. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. th. He has a mini. th. He has a mini. According. th. th. th. He has a mini. th. He has a mini. th. th. He has th. He has th. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. And he th. And he th. And he th. And he th. And he th. He th. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He has a mini. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. He has a mini. And th. And th. He has a mini. present at the scrap car burnings.
It's good turnout at the car burning this year.
That's a great turnout. That's a lot of people.
It's like a ceremony.
Are you going to go down to the car burning later on?
You know, if they're only burning one car, it doesn't sound that good. I know, they've got two. I'm there. I'm there's there. I'm there. I'm there. I'm there. I'm there. I'm there. I'm there. I'm there. I'm there. I'm there. I'm there. I'm there. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm tho. I'm tho. I'm tho. I'm tho. I'm tho. I'm there. I'm tho. I'm tho. I'm tho. I'm th. their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. to? Fuck! But is there any chance that other buildings might set on fire?
Absolutely.
I think of it burning down a community center as well.
Car tires were set on fire on Irene Stratt in...
I am loving this name so much.
Me too.
Vroom Shoup.
That's where you buy your car at the Vroom Shoup. That's where you buy your car at the Vroom Shoup. Is that a place?
Is that a place?
In Vroom Shoup?
Irene Street in Vroom Shoop.
That's beautiful.
Vroom Shoup.
Oh, that's so good.
For the benefit of those who can't read the thing I'm reading due to it being an audio format.
That's right. V. R. O. O. M. S. H. W. P. P. That's the most beautiful word I've ever seen.
Going to the Vroom Shoup. The fire brigade extinguished the tires at the request of the police. Good call. Pussies.
Can't put out through flaming ties yourself.
Keep those tires out for us.
I'm tired.
I'm sleepy from tasing dogs.
We all have coronavirus and we need to lie down.
Elsewhere in the country, many fires were started in waste containers and on the street.
You know.
But there was some good news.
That's right.
I know that you may be thinking to yourself.
Like I know that all of this is under control.
But it does say, yeah.
You're thinking of yourself, thank God, this was all under control.
Well, they've contained the fire to within the borders of the Netherlands.
At least for reporting them.
Yeah, they've contained the fire to the massive jet of gas.
Yeah, and as long as the plume doesn't go over England, we're sorted.
But we do have good news for you folks from disgusting
publication Netherlands NewsLive.com fewer carfires reported for the first
time since 2018. There's some good news. So this is just to be clear before we go
into this this is like the car fire numbers for the entire year, not just for New Year's
Eve. So don't, yeah, I don't want anyone to wig out.
So if you're still in your mind palace in the lazy boy and or hammock, you know, possibly
you're in like maybe you're in one of those, like the ergonomic kind of weird stools
on the two angles where you sort of wedge your legs in there? Yeah, yeah, but then it keeps it the the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. It keeps it keeps th. It keeps th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi's the's the thi's thi's thi. thi. thi. tho-a' tho-a' tho-nigh. Yeah, th. Yeah, thi. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, I th. Yeah, I th. Yeah, I th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I the the th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. I th. th. th. I th. I th. I you sort of have to wedge your legs in there. Yeah, yeah,
but then it keeps you back nice and straight and supported and everything. Maybe you're sitting in
one of those and it feels good to just finally, you know, straighten your back up for once.
Yeah, I just got, you know, I just got the standing desk. to just that. their standing desk? thi. thinne, thi. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. thi. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. th. thin. thi. thin, thin thin thin thin thin thin thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' th and th. And it th. And it th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. thea thea thea thea thea'a' thea' theat thea' thea' theat thea thea thea thea thea they're not much, that much better for you than just like sitting, right?
Really?
Is that true?
I'm, maybe I'm just being contrarian.
Plus it's way more comfy to sit down.
I don't know if you guys have done that, like if you compare like standing up.
I prefer sitting.
And then you have a sit. And you kind of like, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I'm, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, I. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I. I'm, I'm, I'm, I. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, is. don't subargue as they stand up.
Like, oh, so good to be standing up right now.
No.
I had one for a while at my last job.
It was like one that went on top of a normal desk,
but then it would just go whoop and come up, you know?
And at first I was like, hey, that's pretty cool.
And then I didn't use it at all, ever ever You sat down. Yeah and so after a while I was just like I just have this
fucking giant thing on my desk at home. So when I left that job I gave it back
because I didn't want it anymore. My old boss was like crazy. I bet you could
have just kept that and no one would have. I could have but I was like I'm fucking like using it. I think Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben Ben the th like Ben th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thin th. I th. I'm that I'm that I'm that I'm that I'm that I'm that's that's that's that's that's that that that that that that that that that that's that's that's that's that's that that's that's that's that's that's th. I'm just th. I'm just th. I'm just th. I'm just th. I'm just th. I'm just th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm just th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm just thi. I'm just thi. I'm just thi. I'm just thi. I'm just thi. I'm just thi. I fucking like using it. I think, I think Ben to answer your question,
I think the actual thing that is best for people is to have a,
have like a good quality chair and a desk and a workstation that is set up properly,
and then to not sit at it doing work for like four hours at a time,
uninterrupted.
I think the even better version of that is, to not work at a desk for a day-out to-
pointless computer jobs and you just like,
not saying that your job personally is pointless.
It sounds a lot like you're saying that.
Well, you know, you could be out in a field foraging for berries,
you know.
Can you find me a berry foraging job? You're just getting very for yourself. You don't need a job, but it's not like you need a middle manager to tell you.
You're paid in berries.
Yeah, the berries, it's a very direct system.
The berries are your money.
The berries that you're not a fucking country bear.
The only things you need are berries and a tax fall number.
Winnie the number one, Winnie the poo. bunch of blueberries. If you made blueberry jam. He would prefer honey. I think he just prefer
honey. He prefer honey but he eats plenty of other stuff because he's a fat little fuck and he
likes treats. You think he eats something else other than honey the poo. The perfect body
shape for being Winnie the Pooh. Yeah. He does. You sound like someone who's the platonic ideal.
Who's never read A mill's 100-acre wood stories, Lucy.
They're in the public domain now.
He can rewrite those if we wanted.
Whittie the Pooh, who is looking fucking fantastic, by the way.
Winnie the Pooh...
Winnie the Pooh likes snacks.
He likes snacks.
He likes living.
He likes 11sies. He's just pretty much always thinking about having a snack. That's that's what's going on. He likes snacks. He likes living. He likes 11's he's just pretty much always thinking about having a snack.
That's all. Honey, I will give you that honey is absolutely his favorite.
Yeah, but he ate some blueberries. But if you if you made like some some blueberry preserve put it on a scon
He would snuff that shit down
All right. All right. Anyway, fine. Well, well, what? Well, what? Well, what? Well, what? Well, the the the the the the the the the that? Well, that? Well, that? Well, that? Well, that? Well, that? Well, that? Well, that that's, that's, that's, that's, that's. that's. that's that's that's that's that's the he he's that's the the he's he's he's he's he's he's hea. He's hea. He's hea. He's hea. He's hea. He's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's he's he's he's he's the the the the the the the the the the that's the the th. He's th. He's th. He's just th. He's the th. He's just the the the the the the the the the the shit down. All right. All right. Anyway.
Well, what, well,
Carfars?
Yeah, I guess.
Okay.
So anyway, you're in your mine palace,
whatever is your most comfortable kind of chair.
I've got the Britney Spears inflatable chair from 1997.
Oh, hell yeah. Oh right standing desks berries Winnie
the Pooh Mind Palace. Britney Spears inflatable chair. Like you wouldn't want
to work from it that chair but that's not what you're doing in your mind palace
you know? No. So maybe just try and picture what you think is a reasonable number of just random cars
to be set a blaze in a small country in a 12-month period.
Yeah, I think the Netherlands has a population of about 10 million, if I recall correctly.
No, 17 million. All right, so 17 million, you think of how many cars should have been set on fire
in that country in the course of a year?
I will just ask a parallel question though, which is like, does Australia have a reported
number of car fires per year or is it just not happening enough for it to...
I wouldn't say we'd have a lot. I think we should set more cars on fire. You know?
You're saying we're behind in the standings. Yeah. I don't want people from the
Netherlands to be beating us in something. Also the cars are bad. Yeah. Cars are just bad.
Lucy doesn't drive so of course. That's right. Yeah. Of course I'd be against against cars, that's right.
Yeah. The number of car fires for which an alert was
sent via the National P2000 network fell last year for the first time since 2018.
In 2021, 4,750 car fires were reported.
Say it again. 4,750 car fires were reported.
Actually thought you said 450 at first and then you did it again.
4,750, but that's a decrease of 13% from 2020 when there were about 5,500 carfires.
This is stated by the website, alarm rings.
throwne, which collected the data.
There were not fewer car fires everywhere in the
province of Flevoland the number of car... It's the place with all the best
t 133.
Also in Drenth and Friesland, more cars caught fire last year, respectively 7.8 and 6.1% more
than a year earlier.
Cars caught fire.
Who could say what happened?
They've just accepted this as part of their daily lives.
Like, what are you talking about?
It's perfectly normal.
Just uh, I like that there isn't any kind of expectation that thousands of cars stop being
set on fire.
We're just noticing the ticking up and down on the graph.
These have got to be people's cars too.
Like these can't just be scrapyard cars at this point. There's so many. No.
North Brabant saw the largest decrease in car fires,
with a decrease of 21.5% to only 763 fires.
That's great.
Good for North Brabant.
Dealing with the issue.
Most car fires were in the province of South Holland, where 1,089 cars caught fire.
I want to know the population of some of these areas.
Like North Probord.
North Probaut has a population of about 2.5 million.
And that's 763 car fires in 12 months.
It is striking that the number of car fires increased enormously in some places.
For example, Hendrick Ido Ambacht recorded nine car fires last year with only one car burned out in 2020.
Moving up in the world.
You know what they say? 4,750 car fires is statistic, one car fire, this
tragedy. Yep. I'm always saying this. Burn one car and they call you a madman.
Burn 760 cars. 4,750 cars. And they say that's normal. In terms of absolute increase, arson leads the way.
I'm reading it as Aisin.
Assin.
With the number of car fires increased by 20 to 37.
Most cars still catch fire in the big cities.
Like...
Am I missing a key feature of cars?
Are they supposed to do that?
Just they really keep making out like it just,
it just is happening spontaneously.
Or like the cars were-
the really passive phrase, huh?
Yeah.
Most cars catch fire in the big city, like the cars were doing something wrong, you know?
Why were they parked there? From cars, the cars are they they they they the cars? the cars the cars the cars the cars the cars the cars the cars the cars the cars the cars the cars their their their their they're their their they're they're supposed they're supposed they're supposed they're supposed they're supposed they're supposed they're supposed the cars were doing something wrong. You know? Like the cars. Why were they parked there?
From cars and they're self-emilating.
How were the cars dressed?
Amsterdam tops the ranking with 259 reports, followed by the Hague with 253 reports,
followed by Rotterdam with 198 car fires.
Have any of you ever seen a car burning out on the street?
Not on the street.
I've seen a car on fire before though.
That's a big fire.
What was the context of that?
I don't know.
There's just some around the country and was on fire.
There's a bunch of emergency services people around it.
And I was like, oh, shit, that shouldn't happen.
I feel like, I feel like the most sort of burnt-of-of-of-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s, th-s, th-s, th-s, th-s, tho-s, thirty-a-s, tho-s, tho-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a. th. th. th. th shouldn't happen. I feel like the most sort of burnt out cars I ever see are on country roads where somebody
has obviously like stolen a car and take it for a toy ride and then set it on fire.
So you see, you get to see the aftermath.
Yeah, I've seen aftermath, fire cars, that's all.
That's you, Theo, you set any cars on fire? I don't know. You don't know
if you've set any cars on fire. Have I set any? Yes. They should be promoting this as like
a tourist attraction. Yeah. Like you're likely to see a car in fire if you go to Amsterdam.
And that's appealing to me that's appealing to me.
In that country, like 10 cars are set on fire a day, no, like 12 or 13 cars are set on fire a day.
Statistics of you going past one if you're driving around on a holiday, pretty good?
You might see one. You might see one. Keep your eyes peeled kids. There might be a car fire.
I guess that's how they do things over here.
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That's my promise to you.
So I think we've learned an excellent lesson today
in, I guess, managing expectations, you know,
under-promising, over-delivering.
Under-promising people, what they can expect in terms of how many
firefighters and attacks on emergency services workers there are in your country?
It's all about setting expectation. That's it's over delivering in terms of saying, no that's fine
actually. Yeah, it's cool. That's good. No biggie. Oh you look alarmed at the numbers and the things that I've just said to you. That's odd because to me it's cool. That's cool. It's good. No biggie. Oh, you look alarmed at the numbers and the things that I've just said to you.
That's odd because to me it's normal. Yeah, um, because I mean if, you know, if you,
if you didn't know any better, if you didn't have the police chief of the Netherlands to say to you, uh,
to say to you, oh, it's fine, it's thin i i i i's to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to say, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to say, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me... to me, to me, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the th. the. the. the. the. the. tho. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to me, to me, to me, to me, to to you, oh it's fine, it's no big deal. We will wait for the fire to go out.
No major problems.
You might think that it was actually bad vibes in the Netherlands on New Year Eve.
You might think that it was a little bit scary to look out your window and see a bunch of flaming cars and people are hurling objects at firemen and ambulance, ambulance workers and stuff like that.
So you know, like, thank God that we have those guys to, I guess, contextualize things for us.
If we didn't, we would probably think that it was some kind of terrible Omen. You shall see hail fall from a clear sky and burn his fire upon the ground.
You shall see darkness cover Egypt when the sun climbs high to noon.
And you shall know that God is God.
And bow down to his will.
No I won't.
You will though.
It says you. Yeah, that's just your opinion.
That's just your opinion, Charlton Heston playing Moses, acting as a mouthpiece for God.
So this is, of course, the segment where we talk about things that are a sign that maybe things are awry.
This is a story from KXAS news in Dallas Fort Worth, Texas.
Fish falling from the sky reported by residents of East Texas town.
Hey, that's free fish.
That's money, baby.
You don't like fish? You don't like fish?
That is free fish though. Like that sounds
great. That fish is yours. No one's going to be like, gotta get that fish back real quick.
Yeah. Oh, I think that's my fish actually. Get the fuck out of here. That's
my sturgeon. I mean, well, like when a fish falls from the sky, it is a real finders keepers moment.
Yeah.
You know, if that falls in your yard, that's it.
You got a free tuna.
Yeah.
A rare phenomenon that occurred in Texarkana, sitting on the northeast border of Texas
and Arkansas.
It's called Texarkana.
That's awesome.
That's right.
Oh, there's like thousands of these in America, like between California and Mexico, there's a city called
Calexico on the California side and Mexicali on the American side.
You know, that rules.
You're gonna hand it to us.
There's so many of them.
They're dope.
I love them.
It's especially fun if they do like the reversi for each side of the border.
It's very cute.
Good band as well. A... A... A goddame.
Oh yeah, Colexico. I do love Calexico.
They're wonderful.
That's why I went to Calexico.
I was like, I like Calexico.
And I went there, and I walked around and then I bought some popi's, the chicken place.
Got some popi's, it was great, and I went back to my hotel and then watched some beer.
It's wonderful.
Cool. A rare phenomenon that occurred in Texarkana has its residents asking, what the fish?
That is what WTF stands for as far as I know. Yeah, I'm not really sure how to read the way
they've punctuated this. What the and then there's an N-dash, I think. What's the longer version of an M-Dash? Is that the N-Dash?
That's a long dash.
N-Dash?
Are they trying to remove the word fuck?
Or they're just saying, like,
Grove-like, what-what-the-fish?
No, the is?
The M-Dash into the document and then we'll figure this out together. Okay, well there's an N-Dash as well, that's the short one.
Oh, no, I just zoomed out by mistake. What have I done wrong?
This is riveting stuff, folks.
Jesus Christ, this is the word, it's a long dash.
It's a long. I pasted the character from the document into Google, and the ththat came up was M-Dash. I trust Lucy because she works in the field.
I think it looks extra long.
It looks very long.
That's a long dash.
I don't have the notes open.
That's what it is.
It's what-the-fash is.
It's longer than an M-Dash.
What the fish.
What the fuck fish?
I think you might be right Lucy. I think it is what the fuck fish. Multiple Texarkana residents on Wednesday reported finding small fish that have fallen from sky during a storm and
shared videos and images through social media. Experts say that the phenomenon can occur
when water spouts pick up small marine life such as fish or frogs into the sky before they
they drop below. Jesus. But I think they could have solved the problem by using an ellipsis instead of the M dash. Because then it it it it it the the the the the the the the the the the they would it, they would it, they would it, they would it, they would it, they would it, they would it, they would it, they would it, they would it would it would it would it would it would it would th th th. th. th. th. Fish th. Fish th. Fish th. Fish th. Fi. Fi. Fi. Fi. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I, th. I, th. I, the, the, the, their, I, I, I, I, I, their, I, I, their, th. I, I, th. I'. I'. I'm, thi. I'm, thi. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I've. thi. I've. I've. I'm. I think they could have solved the problem by using an ellipsis instead of the M-Dash
Because then it would have been like what the dot dot dot fish
And it would be clear to all of us I would have not punctuated at all I would have said what the fish
Yeah, no one residents asking WTF in and in brackets what the fish? No one has no one has ever said what the fuck? No one saying it like???? No one's saying it like? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah, the. Yeah, the? Yeah, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the fish? the fish? the fish? the fish? the fish? the fish? the fish? the fish? the fish? the fish fish? the fish fish fish fish? What the fish? What the fish? What the fish? What the fish? What the fish? What the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. they. the they. the th. the th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the fish? No one has ever said, what the...
What the...
Fuck?
No one's saying it like that.
No one's saying it like that.
Take that, KXAS news in Dallas Fort Worth.
Get a sub-editor.
Fuck!
Jesus!
But there is no evidence of water spouts or severe flooding in Texarkana that explains what was reported Wednesday
according to the National Weather Service meteorologists.
How far back did they go?
Like could the clouds just have like kept the fish in there for Ron?
You reckon they just...
For on? Yeah, for later on?
You reckon... You reckon...
that some sort of convection current up in the clouds was just keeping the fish up there?
Yes. For a prolonged period of time. For seven months, those fish have been frozen up there in the sky until they were dropped on Texarkana.
I don't know what's going on. I want more details on what kind of fish. They say small fish. We talking like krill, anchovies.
Sardines.
They're not fucking krill.
I don't think people would notice if some krill had been deposited on their lawn.
I'm like peering down with a microscope, a magnifying glass and being like, wait a second.
Gary, Gary. Is that krill on our lawn?
I'm going to have to to tell our neighbor our neighbor our neighbor our neighbor our neighbor, Gary to tell to tell to tell to tell to tell to tell to tell to tell to to theto tell our neighbor Gary, who is a balineed whale.
He's going to fucking love this shit.
So what do you think it is, Ben?
You think they're a groupus?
Fish expert over here.
Oh, marine whale is there?
Or if someone had a handful of fish rain on them.
Who?
Or someone had a handful of fish rain they just throw them up really high. They could, yeah. Like how many people had fish rain on them, you know?
Yeah, was it one man?
Was it one man?
He had a fish throw it at him, and he's trying to rationalize it.
I'm not unpopular.
It was fish falling from the sky.
It was just one lonely man, took a little fish out of the fridge, walked out of the back, chucked it in his yard, stood there for like two minutes,
then got out his phone.
Hello? KXAS?
You're not going to hear about this.
Maybe someone's, in the spirit of beaning, maybe someone's destroying anchovies on people's lawns.
We should make some sort of term for that.
Let's call it fishing. But say that people don't get it confused with the regular kind of
fishing, we call it fishing with a pH. The pH, yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. I like it.
Oh no, but people might get confused with the band Fish, so maybe we'll keep
the pH but we'll call it freaking. And that's a new term for something that we just invented there there there. Yeah the the the the fish. And th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. And th th th th is th is th is th is th is the. And the. And the. And the. And the's the's th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th, th is th is th is th is th is the, the is the is the is theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeean, theean, theeeean, theeeeeeeeeeeeee an the an the an term for something that we just invented there. How about fish fish two?
Fishing to or fish towing.
Yeah.
I think we need to think outside the box.
Why don't we rename the band Fish?
There's something like Bomb Funk MC's.
Yes. We'll rename Bomb Funk MC's.
We'll call their techniques.
Called 1,200 techniques? Call 1,200 techniques?
Called 1, 200 techniques, something generic like, I don't know, the smiths.
Like, 98 degrees, you know?
Who the fuck is 98 degrees?
I've got a number.
This guy doesn't know 98 degrees, I wasing.
Are you going on about your fucking vodka vodka?
Hey, can I get your hottest vodka? Vodka has a number in it. Who would want boiling hot vodka there? It's...
Can I get your hottest vodka?
Who is not the 8th-3, so I don't know who that is.
It's a boy band.
It's a band of boys.
I think it's, is it, is it the Irish boy bands that...
Oh, Steven Spielberg?
Did they do, baby when the lights go out?
That's five-five.
Did they do?
Did they do, I swear?
Did they do all rise?
It's the one with Nick Lachay.
Oh yeah.
That's what's up.
You know?
Did they do Backstreet's back?
Yes, I believe that was them.
Yeah.
I think Nick Lashet's brother was in the band too.
Yeah, who the fuck is Nicolet.
Yeah, stop saying these things.
Married to Jessica Simpson, they're on a TV show.
Usually we we're all that TV show.
Oh, Ashley Simpson's sister.
That's right. Now you get it. Oh. So we name 12-foot MC's Ashley Simpson, and we've cleared up some frames back.
Just to use the active tril.
Yeah, fishy, which is to throw it in the internet.