Boonta Vista - EPISODE 335: Gammer Throw Your Gila Monster

Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome to Buntevista episode on the Dance Club. I'm got a 50th to the weather. I'm thanks. Welcome to Buntavista, episode 335. I'm Theo, and I've got two cool swords. Let's see. I'm handsome. It's six-four, absolutely ripped, but in a way that's not showy. I've got a pretty cool wolf necklace,

Starting point is 00:00:46 which all the ladies love. Oh yeah, I'm super good at fighting and fucking, because I took a bunch of drugs all at once and I sweated out in a castle until all my shit got wicked good. I'm strolling through this bucolic town, full of the sights and sounds and smells of country living. But I'm not here to relax. As always, I'm on the hunt for monsters, and more specifically, coin to fund my itinerant

Starting point is 00:01:14 lifestyle. Here we will meet all kinds of characters. Will they be complex and sexy like myself? Or... More sort of the earth types. I'll need to listen closely and leave no stone unturned. Here in a diarrhea stained dress attempting to force two swans down the town well while babbling incoherently, it's Lucy. What say you madame of monsters and mate? Um, top of the morning to you.

Starting point is 00:01:50 Say you wouldn't be able to help me with shoving these swans down a well would you? I have coin. Oh, there's coin in it for me. Is there? I see you've got two swords. Yeah. Are the swans, okay, it's sort of like a moral turnpike here. Do the swans need to be alive when they go down the well or can I just like... Well that's kind of your decision. There's kind of like three parts you can take. You can cut the heads off the swans.

Starting point is 00:02:20 Yeah, I got one sword that's real good for beasts. Yeah, Dave. Another sword is real good for men. I'm passing through a dark alleyway. Where I find the temperature of a town is often most easily taken. But in my passage, I bump against a level 3 brigand. It threatens to let me taste his steel. It's Andrew. Anyone taste my steel? I just cut an apple with it, so it's like... Yeah.

Starting point is 00:02:51 It's still got a little juice on it? Pretty good. Threatening though the way that you're cutting that apple. And I do have an enormous steel that's just for men. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. I got a big, big old th th th th th th th th th th th th th-a th-a th-a th-a th-a th-a th-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a thii thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thii thi thi-a-a-a-a-a-ss tha-s tha-s tha-s ta-s ta-sa-sa-sa-sa-sa-sa-sa-sa''-sa'-sa'-sa'-sa' can use mine for other stuff. I got a multi-purpose steel. This one's just for killing dudes. Do you have anything that's not a dude that needs cutting? I could do that for you.

Starting point is 00:03:12 Yeah, this looks like it might end up being a useful relationship. Let's band together, yeah. Plus one, please. Oh, and so finally we, we, arrive. Me and my new friend. We did that, not the do- That crazy bird with the swans or whatever. She did not join the party. Remove her from the party.

Starting point is 00:03:35 Are you sure you want to permanently remove the swan lady from your party? Oh, we arrive at the local tavernor where I find a man with whom I have a Rondezvue with. I'm hoping he has some important information to share with me. I settle down at the table and order three enormous beers. One for me, one for level 3 Brigand, and one for Gal Galbett the tollis, called as such because he bit all his toes off out of boredom. It's Ben. Hey brother, what's up? Do you have any trouble balancing after biting all those toes off. Yeah. That way you mainly stay at the bar? And why did you?

Starting point is 00:04:27 Yeah. And why did you say you got something for me? What's that all about? Hey, brother. What's up? I give you two coins to punch me in the nuts. Taken. And this is probably based on an actual person who goes to the bar in which you work Ben as well, I'd say. Yeah, I can picture five people in my mind that exactly fit this profile. Yeah, great.

Starting point is 00:04:58 Yeah. Anyway, that's the intro. I'm pretty sure I've done that one before. Yeah, uh, earlier offered that if... What about a sword is it's just for men? I offered earlier just in case you weren't super confident in your intro that I had a backup one, which was a gesture of friendliness, not one of being like, hey, I don't think you're up to the task. Yeah. And I'm glad we went with yours instead of mine which was going to be

Starting point is 00:05:27 the bucket of come intro. Okay well we'll still have that one. I think we've done that before. We've probably done the bucket of come intro before. Podcast that's been going for six years does the same intro scenario twice. That wouldn't be a headline you'd read, because no one does headlines about podcasts. It's time for headline news. Here we go. Woman accidentally gives baby worst name ever than subs when she realizes what she's done. I think she knew. I think she knew the whole time. I think we were just discussing before the podcast started us all, like casually giving our children the worst names ever, but just like as part of talking about them.

Starting point is 00:06:23 Yeah, Ben, you were saying it's okay to call them. I was saying that you guys can't do that. Why McDonald's is flipping its M to become Wick Donald's? Pardon? And that's for you to go and find out. Do your own research. What if it was Wicke and McDonald's and it was a little bit spooky? Yeah. Oot crammed with 150 foul-smelling swans after horror event.

Starting point is 00:06:52 Town well packed full. Yeah. No wet spots of that. None of the swans died, by the way. Little rope up around the well. I will reveal that about the story, just in case you thought A little rope up around the well. I will reveal that about the story, just in case you thought that headline might have been about something horrific. Which it kind of is, but... Yeah. They're very bad smelling swans. Rather fight 150

Starting point is 00:07:15 foul smelling swans or 200 normal smelling swans. Oh, what a great would you rather? I'd really need a preview of the smell. I think I'm happily taking the stinky swans personally. I want to maximize my combat odds. That's what I know about you primarily is that you'll pick the stinky swans. I, the stinky swan is often the most rewarding swan. Yeah, to bait up, yeah. You do need to steal yourself against poison damage.

Starting point is 00:07:46 We're gonna do a flurry of blows on a swan. Pick the sinkier one. Like what I'm mad at him is realizing that swans are just butt holes. They're like you think that they're like these beautiful graceful animals but they're just to- They're little cunts. Yeah, like they're so rude. I still been wronged in any way by a swan. I still think swans as being beautiful birds. Sort of like... I've been wronged by a goose and I often mix up a goose in swathes. Oh everyone's been wronged with goose. Also. I'm pretty sure you're being wronged by a goose story is in your, our top five most told of this podcast stories. I would never tell a story touri- th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've tou. I've tou. I've tou. I've tote. I've tote. I've tote. I've tote. I've tote. I've tote. I've tote. I've tou. I've tote. I've tote. I would never tell a story twice. Bus diarrhea, gaping leg wound. No, bust diarrhea I have only heard secondhand so it cannot be. That came up on an episode that I was not on. That might have been during

Starting point is 00:08:36 periods of one of your kids being recently born. Yeah. During the baby times you might have missed. The things you miss when your kids are born. Yeah. Oh my God, yes, life is what happens when you're not too busy looking after your kids. Hey, but I bet if you polled our listers to see which stories they love the most, they'd probably say gay pig leg wound or bust diarrhea are attacked by goose, and we could find that out by conducting a poll, which is a thing we look at in the poll report. Ash, tas, thear, and Osman, Zed Wolfsky, and An Oswalden Zed Zimian Andsthevsky, Zimiannetsen, Zimms, Nationalist the Nation.

Starting point is 00:09:39 Alitovahs, Zooling and shone will be sworems sworemsmsmsmsmsms the island will of thewere tombsen, be golden tombreefffrogue Intold us goldish and goldfrogne Zenoanvsky and Toski This is a poll from Yougov the gold and sworeov, the poll conducted of Americans, people in the United States, done on February 22nd of this year.

Starting point is 00:10:34 Here we go. There's two questions here. First question, how often do you see other drivers run red lights? Okay, just people gunning it through a red line. I'm sorry, where is this taken from? Oh, America? America? America.

Starting point is 00:10:52 Never heard of it. Okay, I'm familiar. Yeah. Seven percent of people said, they're not sure. Probably too busy on their team phones. Yeah. Four percent of people said never, 28% of people said seldom, 7% said once a month, 18% said a few times a month, 7% said once a week, 17% said a few times a week, and 13% of people said daily.

Starting point is 00:11:20 So you raise this. In Tasmania, I would say I see someone run a red light more than once daily. Are you fucking serious? I feel like this is a particularly Tasmanian disease. Like Tasmanians are very slow drivers. They love to drive under the speed limit on the highway. But they also love to just run red lights and as a pedestrian I see it every single day. I'm going to disagree with you, Lucy, that I don't think it's a uniquely Tasmanian problem. You don't see this, yeah. No, I don't think it's a uniquely Tasmanian problem. I think we are also doing it in Cambron every day.

Starting point is 00:11:58 I see it in Cambron every day. And where the fuck do they have to go? Where have you got to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be, to be, to be, I, to be, the the the the the the the they, I, I, I, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I, I, I, I, I, they. I, I, I, they. I, I, the, the, the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. I, the they. I'm, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha'a, tha'a, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, the fuck do they have to go? Where have you got to be? I mean, we've both got pretty quiet cities, right? Well, I'm- Why are we running red lights? Yeah. My theory is that like, the more quiet the city is and the less traffic there is, yeah, people get real lazy. Yeah, they become like inherently entitled to be going wherever they want at all speed they want at all times. So when there's like, if you live in a really busy city and there's a bunch of traffic you go, yeah of course there's all these people here.

Starting point is 00:12:31 But if you live in a quiet city where there's lots of space and then there's someone in front of you, it fills you with a blinding rage. Yeah. You go, no, you're not meant to be to be to be to be to be to be ed. Or maybe the lights just just turned red as you get there and you go, hey It's my trait for me. Yeah, a little trade for me. Everyone makes fun of Queenslanders for being bad drivers. That's sort of a It's a staple of East Coast Australian humor. I don't feel like I'm seeing a lot of people running red lights. I'm not in on it. I their I their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. th. th. th. th. th. threat. threat. threatment threatment threatment tre. tre. tre. tre. tre. tre. tre. It's tre. It's tre. It's tre. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. trait. trait. train. train. train. train. train. treat. treat. treat. treat. treat. treat. treat. treat. trade trade trade trade trade trade trade trade trade trade trade. It's trade. It people running red lights. I'm not in on it. I don't know. I think Brisbane driver is largely respectful. I'm saying he more times to be clear than anywhere else.

Starting point is 00:13:10 Oh, they're bad drivers is in their morally bad drivers. Yeah, bad people who are driving. Right, I understand that. And Sydney siders won't run red lights, but they will honk the whole fucking time. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, I'm thi, I thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I thi, I thun, I thun, I thun, I thun, I thun, I thun, I thun, I thun, I thunne, I thunne, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I, I th. I th. I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I'm thi, I'm that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that thi. I'm thi, I'm th lights, but they will honk the whole fucking time. Yeah. Yes. Fuck those guys. Why are you honking? Why are you honking your horn?

Starting point is 00:13:31 Ever? Yes. I'd rather get hit by a car than honk to let them know that I'm there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. If I'm driving. You're thi thi. th't let you behind the wheel for a car. You gotta let them know you're there, you know.

Starting point is 00:13:47 I'm driving. I'm driving. I'm driving. I'm driving. Oh look, there's some people over there. Hoog, hog. I'm driving. I'm driving.

Starting point is 00:13:55 That is kind of how. thiiii. . I'm not being racist, this is a cultural thing. Let's go! But in a lot of Southeast Asian countries, that is how people drive because people, it's like a courtesy thing that if you're about to overtake someone because they're slower than you and you're swerving around behind them. You just do a little bee beam? Yeah, you do.

Starting point is 00:14:19 And like trucks have, a lot of trucks will have signs on the back that just say please honk just so that they know that people are about to go around them. I'm driving. Honk if you're friendly. Yeah, honk if you're friendly, yes. When did we lose that as a society? Yeah, honk if you like me. Yeah, honk if you like me. How about a Buntowista bumper sticker? Honk if you like me.

Starting point is 00:14:45 Yeah, we could do that actually. I have one more question here for you with a set of responses. While driving, how often do you run a red light when you encounter one? 3%? Not sure. Probably. I don't know. I'm not looking at the lights at all. I wouldn't know if they were red or not.

Starting point is 00:15:06 10% I don't drive. Yep, there's Lucy. Okay, fair. Yeah. 46% to their credit, say never. Well, I mean, to their credit in how they answered, we don't know if they're telling the truth. Yeah, they're measuring from the torsor or from the base. Why would would would would would would would would would would would would would would would would would would would??? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? their? their? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I'm? I? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? I? I? their? I? I? their? I? I? their? I? their? their? their? their? their? their. th. th. tod. today. today? today. today? the. their. their. their. their. their? their torso or from the base. Yeah. Why would you measure from that guy? What? Uh, rarely, 25%. Sorry, 46% of Americans, liars.

Starting point is 00:15:33 25% exaggerators or undersadurators. Sometimes 8% percent. Often, 4%. But here's where we get to... I think the key statistic here. 4% always. Yes. Yes.

Starting point is 00:15:57 I actually slam on my brakes if the light is green. Every... It's the joker. To me, red means go. It's always opposite day for me. You're the big disparity in these numbers, huh? Yeah. Of how many people I see running a red lights for me, I never do. That's just, who is this person? Who are the 4% of respondents?

Starting point is 00:16:22 Red lights, George. But always... Yeah, there's like, ah, fuck it. I'm going through, maybe it's just one th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. the th. It's just th. the thi. the thi. It's just thi. It's just the thi. thi. It's just thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's the the the thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's just thi. the thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. lights George. It always. Yeah, there's like, oh fuck it. I'm going through baby. Maybe it's just one guy. Ain't died yet. I'm driving. I'm driving. I'm try to

Starting point is 00:16:34 I saw a cyclist yesterday to a full red across the intersection one and I was like, hey, don't do that. Yeah, for your sake. Yeah, it's got like, you're the meat on the outside. Yeah, all your shit's on the outside, pal, you're just going to go vaporized. Yeah, margin of error and risk of being extremely pancake, much higher for you. Yeah. Or is the margin of area it's lower?

Starting point is 00:17:05 There's like dash game videos of people like swirving to intentionally hit cyclists. Yes, fucked up. It's one of the least, like, explicable behaviors for me. Of like modern society. There's like, what, time to hop in my murder box? People hate him. They fucking hate him. This is a class of people I'm allowed to murder.

Starting point is 00:17:29 I will say, I'm not sure how I feel about the people who have like... Here we go. There we go. Montefista at Gmail. Come. Here we go. No, I'm just not sure how I feel about the people who are like cycling advocates who have social media accounts and they have. This the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the the th. This is have their th. This is have their th. This is th. This is the. I have th. I have thate. I'm that's that's that's thateck. I'm thateck. I'm that's that's that's thatheatheatheatheatheatheat. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the class. I the. I the class. I the class. I the class. I the class. I'm the class. I'm the class. I'm the class. the class. the class. the class. the class the class. the class. the class. the class the class class the class. thea. thea. the class. I'm the class how I feel about the people who are like cycling advocates who have social media accounts and they have cameras strapped to them at all times and they just kind of barrel into particular situations where they know that something's like that someone's going to sort of merge across them or whatever. So that they can then go, hey, you were doing the wrong thing, because I was like, I get it, I get what you're saying, but also you might die at some point?

Starting point is 00:18:13 Yeah. I'm not asking for it, Andrew. I'm not on Facebook, so I don't know. I... Is it not a thing I'm familiar with and I'm assuming you've invented it, kind of as a straw man? I am simply saying I personally would rather be alive than correct in some situations, you know what I mean? You know what I mean? I think we should all be doing the... I'd often rather be correct, but... What do they call it? The Scandinavian Reach Around, the Nordic Twist, the one where you open your car door

Starting point is 00:18:44 by using your left hand to grab your door handle so that it forces you to turn your entire body so that you can see if there's a cyclist there that you're about to absolutely fucking murder by opening a door in front of them. So this is the Buntavista completely sincere, genuine tip of the week. Do the Scandinavian reach around. Try the Scandinavian reach around. You want to like it. Yeah, use the opposite hand to what you would normally open your car door with if you're on the driver's side.

Starting point is 00:19:14 And then that way you turn and you look. I feel like it's someone else's hand. It feels like somebody else's hand is doing. In that the the the the the the the the the the the their their their. In that hand? Scandinavian. Do the Scandinavian stranger in your guard. Maybe like a Scarsguard or something. Oh my God. Little reach around from a Scarsgard? Maybe Stirling.

Starting point is 00:19:34 I wouldn't complain if any of the Scarsgards climbed into my bed. Oh, except for the fourth one that we found out about the other night. Don't much care for him. Get that guy out of here. There's another kind of poll that we look at. These ones are from Poland. It's time for the poll report. Ash, tasks, thear, Phrush, thear, Phrushen, Trolls'en Zimbabweanian sworeen schenze nigham. Astone, trees, nation, nationalism nigh.

Starting point is 00:20:17 Ashn'en, roosts, their thanks, Zedrichoskii Zoolingen Zulnikvinsz will Zimmphen the the the the the the the the the the the the willto the the the

Starting point is 00:20:50 the Love it. You know what they say. You could lead a stolen horse up the staircase of an apartment block in Poland. You can't figure out what this man was doing. You can maybe make me drink a beer I reckon if you cracked it open, give a little... If you see a man leading a stolen horse up the staircase in your apartment block. No you didn't. No you didn't., you didn't. No, you didn't. Yes. I'll just say this, male loneliness, it's an epidemic. Yes, yes.

Starting point is 00:21:53 At least he's got someone in there within the apartment with him. Would you rather he was alone? We make them so that they're not protectors anymore. They're not providers, they're not caregivers, you know? They're not the hunters, they're not the gatherers. We can't even let them have a horse in their apartment that they drink beer with. And who owns a, you can't own a horse? You don't own a horse. Yes. Everyone's so correct today. Oh, everyone's so correct to be free and free in an apartment. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:22:27 Freedom to choose. There's got some stairs to take first. I'm not saying that every horse wants to be in this guy's apartment, but some horses do and we should let those horses be there. Yes. Empower horses, folks. Empower Polish horses. Yeah, these are Polish stairs as well,

Starting point is 00:22:45 which I'm having fun. They only go down. An unusual intervention took place in the Polish town of Weirovo, no, Veirovo, where the police were called out in response to a man leading a horse up the staircase of an apartment block. The suspect had been arrested and could now face up to five years in prison for stealing the animal. Oh, shit.

Starting point is 00:23:14 Oh, come on. Five years for having a friend? Yeah. Yes. The horse thief was stopped by a bystander, who noticed the unusual situation? One person in the apartment block was like, Hey, Mo, hang on. Hey man, what are you doing? What's that?

Starting point is 00:23:30 You normally have a horse with you? That's how you're normally. That's how you're, that's how. That's how many Polish listeners. I retract. I'm sure. It's eve. I'm so sorry, Ben, that's what you sound like. Many Polish listeners, I apologize. A spokesperson for the local police told notes from Poland

Starting point is 00:23:49 that the bystander then notified the authorities and kept hold of the horse until their arrival, preventing the thief from taking the animal to higher floors of the building. A little standoff. Where is he holding? I thinks he's on a landing. I got a th got a Polish tha tha tha the tha tha tha thoahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah. their thoooooo. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. their their their their their tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. th. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. too. too. too. tooo. tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. A. too. too. to horse. I think you just stand in front of them not very smart. I think he's on a landing. Got a Polish horse on a landing there. You will not take this horse any higher. That's as high as this horse gets. You hear me? I'm holding on to this horse until the police arrive. You'd take this horse from my cold, dead, Polish hands.

Starting point is 00:24:20 The thief meanwhile fled the scene. Fuck he's got the horse. The horse. The horse. The horse the horse the horse the horse the horse the horse the horse the horse the horse the horse the horse the horse the horse the horse the horse the horse the horse the horse the horse. the horse. the horse. the horse. the horse. the horse fled the scene. Quote, The man. The bystander had the horse secured with him, while the perpetrator returned to the scene after a while and was apprehended by police. He came back like, is that horse still here? Yeah, maybe the best to check my horse and go. This was like, ran away. It was like, wow, they probably forgot about it. They came back. The police is still there, he's like, come on! It should you be stopping actual crimes? It's been 10 minutes, surely I'm safe.

Starting point is 00:24:53 I reckon the cool down on Polish police is. Yeah. I ran out of the flashing red and blue circle. Changed my outfit. Got a different horse. It was later established that the 19-year-old had stolen the mayor, which is worth 15,000 Zolotti, about 3,500 euro. Oh, he stole it from a local stud. Yeah. Seems unnecessarily information, but... Hottie in his area with an easy to steal horse. I hear he's got two swords. Quote, he lives on the third floor, so he tried to get to the third floor with his horse, a resident of the block told TV.

Starting point is 00:25:36 Yeah, makes sense. Yeah, makes sense. I'm taking this horse to the fourth floor. It just comforts me to know that he's up there. The big man upstairs, that horse I took up there. He clops on the floorboards, I sleep right as rain. The perpetrator, described by the resident as, quote, problematic. He's been doing some accents that you, you just can't do those anymore. Yeah. A Japanese Polish accent. Here's what that might sound.

Starting point is 00:26:07 Well, I think someone's going to come through and filly at all the hypotheticals on this podcast and we're going to be in so much trouble. The problematic resident had allegedly been seen around the stable before and had already tried to steal a horse in the past. Hmm. I probably wouldn't let him back at the stable I think. Yeah. Try and steal one horse, that's, that's, that's, that's, you, you, you, you, you, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're kind, you're kind, you're kind, you're kind, you're kind, you're kind th, you're kind, you're kind of, you're kind, you're kind th. th. th. thi, you're kind kind kind thi, you're kind, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, you're, you're, you're, you're thi, you're thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, the past. I probably wouldn't let him back at the stable, I think. Yeah. Trying to steal one horse, that's a kind of, you're blacklisted. Yeah. No, it's a zero strikes rule. Pre-emptive. You sort of, you did a pre-crime by thinking about stealing my horse,

Starting point is 00:26:39 so I'm not going to let you steal my horse, shame on me. You know, you come and steal my horse. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the the the the the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, to to to to to to to to to the, to the, to to to steal to to to to to the, you're the, you're the, you're the the, you're the, you, you're the, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you're to to to to to to to to to to to to the, the, the, the the the the thean thean thean thean thin theanan, theanan, theanananan, theanan, shame on me. Yes. You know, you come and steal my horse. Shame on you. Yep. Yep. And to that disloyal horse. Yeah, he went willingly. Yeah. He's in really key. Actually. Maybe it's just dumb. Maybe the horse you can lead to water. They'll just go anywhere. Yeah. Up the stairs? Sure. I think you can leave it. Let's go. Yeah, I think the issue the issue the issue the issue the issue the issue the issue the issue the issue the issue the issue the issue the issue the issue the issue the issue the issue is the issue is the issue is the issue is the issue is the issue is the issue is the issue is the issue is to steal to steal to steal to steal. I to steal. I to steal to steal to steal to steal to steal to steal to steal to steal to steal to steal to steal to steal to steal to steal. I to steal. I to steal. I to steal. I to steal. I to steal. I to steal. I to steal. I to steal. I to steal. I to steal. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the horse. S the the the the the the the the the the horse. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S'll just go anywhere. Yeah. Up the stairs, sure. I think you can let's go. Yeah, I think the issue was never about leading a horse to water. What? Oh, hang on. Yeah, it's the horse that can drink. Yeah. Very hydrated horse. The horse that will watch John Wick for if you put it on the TV while he's sitting on your couch. Yeah. And go, look, that's you. That's you!

Starting point is 00:27:26 John Wick. Three, sure. He's riding a horse in the opening scene of John Wick four. Come on. Yeah, Mayor Culper. I haven't seen it. Mare a Culper. Mayor, Culper.

Starting point is 00:27:37 May a Mayor. Mayor, too. Hey Ben, I just want to note that I think when the horse is drinking his water, he says, Mia Gulpa! I'm really glad that you know that. Mera gulper. Merri. Merri. Maybe one of these bad enough that everyone forgets about a horseshoe mirror. It's come full-servle though.

Starting point is 00:28:09 Yes, yes. Yeah. Like a horses. Yeah, once you've taught him how to open beer bottles for this, it's over for the person that originally owned the horse. Now horses don't have a, they're not like, they can't recognize themselves in the mirror, right? Like they see another horse in the horse. Now horses don't have a, they're not like, they can't recognize themselves in the mirror, right? Like they see another horse in the mirror and they just start hissing. Yeah, they're not smart. They try to smash the other horse with their hoof. That's right.

Starting point is 00:28:35 They try to bite it. Even though the animal was to return to its owner, as traumatized by her partner. By her partner? Hmm. The situation was too tense for it. It will have a long way to go before getting better, he told to him. Now there is every chance that the horse got spooked by the fact it was stolen and then sort of made to go up a set of stairs. But maybe the symptoms you're seeing could just be devastated, devastated, didn't get to bro down with that man, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, the th, th, the th, th, th, th, th, the th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to to be to be to be to be toooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooomom, thi,to bro down with that man. Yeah, lost a friend. Yeah. It took him so long to make, friend now he's lost a friend. Yeah. Fuck.

Starting point is 00:29:09 Clashing police lights. Yeah. So- it's a big show. And your wife, I wouldn't go home from that song. And if you're under 30, go fuck yourself. Yeah, we haven't learned on that hard enough as well. I don't think we exported the Whitlam's. Or you don't think we learned hard enough on telling Americans to go fuck themselves. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:29:34 Hey, that horse that was bereaved by the loss of a friendship might have a question for our love doctor. It's time for paging Dr. Lucy. If you find that you are having a little relationship trouble. Just to pick up your telephone and dial it on the double. You call 1,800, 3,17, 5,155, now your page and I couldn't see. This is a post from R slash introverts. The post is titled Simply Worldliness. Now a lot of the times I've been using this segment just as a way to get a random posting

Starting point is 00:30:25 here that's phrased as a question, but this time I genuinely think Lucy just because of your life experience and the education that you've had, you might be able to answer this one. Here we go. Can anyone teach me about worldliness? Who are good people and who are bad? Who is not? What are the factors that come in between friendship to keep it a long-lasting? I'm a very kind person and therefore I end up helping everyone, but in the process people take advantage of me.

Starting point is 00:30:54 They use me to get their work done, do their payments, so on and so forth. I don't know what lies in the real world and how to protect myself from horrible feelings and overthinking. I don't know anything about worldliness. Hmm. Lucy? Um, hmm. Like, it's a classic human question, right? Now we're all asking ourselves this, um, like, what is worldliness?

Starting point is 00:31:22 Yes. Why is everyone taking, like, using me for their payments? What is this person asking generally? I think they mean like be street smart maybe not not worldly They do seem to be country bumpkin coded. Yeah, they do seem to have been tricked into whitewashing offense. Yes. Yeah, except by Tom Sawyer. Microsoft itself. Yeah, they've been scammed and tricked by like haters, their whole life.

Starting point is 00:31:50 That's what I'm hearing. Yes. Yes. Yeah, protect, protect your peace. I keep seeing that one on Tick Tock. You need to protect your piece, even if that means cutting off every person in your life. Yeah, like people that have helped you and you've been part of your community and like, yeah, you don't owe them anything. You don't know anyone in your life anything.

Starting point is 00:32:12 Don't have the negativity get to you. Yeah. Yes. It's one of the central ironies of this whole thing and it may be, it may seem counterintuitive, but actually to become worldly, you must simply cut yourself off from the world entirely. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. It you, yes. It you, yes. It you, yes. It you, it, it to to to to to to to to to to to to you to to to to to to to to th tho thi thi, you don't thi, you don't thi, you thi, you thi, you thi, you th. You th. You th. You th. You th, you th, you th, you th, you the the the th, you the the the the the the the the the the th. You th. You th. Yeah, you th. Yeah, you thi, you don't thi, thi, thi to to tho to to to tho to thooooooo thoooooe the. You don't the the the the worldly, you must simply cut yourself off from the world entirely. Yes. Yeah. Prioritize you only. I like that people like that sort of self-care stuff went so far that it became objectivism. They just like turned into ironed over time.

Starting point is 00:32:42 Yeah. Just being like, oh no, you don't know anyone's shit. No, no, no, just take sort of what you need for people and then when you decide they're annoying. Oh, we've had a beautiful 12 years of friendship, but you asked me to help you move, and I was actually having a boundary for me. Where I was watching the good place at home, and then I got your message, and it made me feel like put upon, so you're out out out out out out out out out out, th, th, th, th, th, to to be to be to be th, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, to be to be to be to be to be to be like, like, like, like, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be to be to be to be to be like, to be like, to be like, like, to be like, to be like, to be like, to be like, to be like, like, like, like, like, tape, like, like, like, like, like, tape, like, like, to be like, to be like, to be like me feel like put upon, so you're out. I'm just actually protecting my pace right now. My peace needs to be protected. Yes.

Starting point is 00:33:10 Yeah. And don't forget that a true friend will never, ever, ever criticize you in any way or they will never ask you to interrogate your own beliefs or positions or have you consider the impacts that you have on other people in the world. Yeah, I mean if they ask you to move, they should know, they should know you're very sleepy. You had a late night, you're up all night. So sleepy. Yeah, if they knew you're always always, oh, it's sleepy.

Starting point is 00:33:36 Yeah. It's hot out there. It's hot out out. And they. And th. And, and they. And, and they. And, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, they's, they's. And, they's. And, they's. And, they're, they's. Yeah, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, I. Yeah, I. Yeah, I. Yeah, I. Yeah, I. Yeah, I. Yeah, I. Yeah, I. Yeah, I. Yeah, I. Yeah, I. Yeah. Yeah, I. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. Yeah, they. It's. Yeah, they. It's. It's. It's. It's. Yeah, they. Yeah, they. Yeah, they. Yeah. years later you see in the news that this person's being arrested because there was there was setting a bunch of fires like so many fires for years and years. It's a it's a really good read the the introvert subred it. Just if anyone wants to check that out. Yeah, I was just thinking that I've never seen that and I'm sure it's full of really like really measured stuff about like that just kind of introverted. Yeah, yeah, I think we take take like their own lives into their hands and like you know really inspect their own selves and stuff. Yeah, it's not that. It's not that. There's no introspection among any of these people. Which is ironic. I mean I'm kind of an introvert. I get energy by, I get drained by social situations, but I get energy by being alone. And then these fuckhead kids of mine. See, I'm sort of an ambivert in that sometimes I like having some quiet time and sometimes

Starting point is 00:34:39 I like being social. And I have the rarest creature on this earth. That's crazy. I'm something of an emotional unicorn. It just sucks so bad. Like there are just some things where we should never have given people the language to describe stuff. Because they just sort of take it so far in the other direction. Like there are people who are very earnestly posting like, I'm an introvert, it will be impossible for me to find love.

Starting point is 00:35:09 Or it's like, no, no, no, you don't have like, agoraphobia or anything. Yeah, you just find it a little taxing to do social activity. Yeah, you can still go out in small bursts. Yeah, you could go to a deer hoof concert. And then you can meet the love of your life, and have it it it it it it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it will, it will, it will th, it, it will th, it, it, it will th, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, to th, to th, to th, to to to to to to to to to th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the thi, Yeah, you go to a deer hoof concert. You could go to a deer hoof concert and then you can meet the love of your life and have two kids that ruin your life. Beautiful boys you listening to this because your dad's dead, your old man's finally kicked the bucket and he loved you so much. He's so proud of you. Yeah, I did die because I forgot to put the handbreak on on the Skoda. Yeah ran me over. Ranned me. Ried th. Ried th. Ried th. Ried to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their to their to their to their to to to to to to to to their their to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I tho tho tho tho tho thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Wyvern, oh damn. We do have to stop teaching people language, like particularly therapy language. You can't, you cannot trust.

Starting point is 00:35:54 Like boundaries, we've got to get the word boundaries just like out of here. Yeah. But it's so much more convenient, like having this language to talk about stuff instead of actually talking about the problem. It's like you can get out of a long the long the long th of a long tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho this tho this tho this stuff instead of actually talking about the problem. It's like you can get out of a long conversation by a friend being like, oh I've got this really odd situation where I need to ask my friend for something but I also owe them money so it feels like that. And you can just be like, the other party you just say, oh boundaries. Boundaries. Boundaries. Yeah, just enforce boundaries. Yeah, just enforce boundaries. Emotional labore. Protect your peace. Yeah, instead of being like, oh fuck, all right, well maybe we need to do some work here to fix this boundaries.

Starting point is 00:36:27 Yeah, that sounds like like a pickle. Actually, feeling kind of gaslit right now, so. Yeah, you are actually, by having this conversation with me, you're violating my boundaries. I did not consent to having an annoying conversation with you at brunch. You can not saddle me. I. Yeah. to to to to to that. that. that. that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. that. Yeah. Yeah. that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's like that's that's like that's that's like that's like that's like, that's like, that's. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. I'm. Yeah. I'm. I'm. I'm. Yeah. I'm. Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah. Yeah. I'm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. your emotional baggage. Yeah, no good. I got so much Eldon Ring to talk about. You were like, ma'am, I lost my best friend because of some stuff that happened in history and stuff. I found a cool true.

Starting point is 00:36:56 What about the great lift of Dekas? Ideally, someone will ask you if you can hold space for them at this point in time, and then you can issue them with a very, very abrupt and firm, no. No, I can't. And then back to your phone. You don't actually have to look up from the phone to say no. No. Yeah, sorry.

Starting point is 00:37:23 That's someone asking you to do emotional labor. Don't have to do that. And this is probably happening in real life as well. It's not just Tick Tocks of people telling other people to do it. Like the fake therapists telling other people, like you can do this. Yeah. People probably are. I agree. Yeah. Hey, it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th's is's is is th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thea. thea. thozy. thoom. thoom. thi. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. tooooooooooooooooooo. to. to, it's crazy out there. Like it's kind of crazy in nature as well. It's time for Nature Corner. Bultonkissa, Nation Corner, Rubbercraft, Snipped my Dick, Snipped. You'll ever had your dick snipped?

Starting point is 00:38:17 No. Not me. I only tell that to the $10 listener levels. Yeah. Yeah. What's, we got, friend the show is the $5. What was the $10 one? Love of the show? So we can find out who's had their dick snipped.

Starting point is 00:38:34 Yeah, I think everybody knows who's had a visecta is circumcised and who is about their circumcision. Oh, sorry, everybody knows who's had theirsectctctctctctctctctctctctctctctctctctctctcte their to to to to their to to to their to to to their to to their to to their their to the other step. Two layers of snipping. Sorry, everybody knows who's head of a sect we got this podcast and who hasn't. Every now and then I look through the exit surveys of people who have discontinued. Oh man, don't do that. If I did that I would be catatonic. That's the porcelain man right now. I would shut down the whole podcast the moment I saw a single critical word. Yeah, that's your purse porcelain man. Honestly, we've been doing this for like six or seven years or something absurd. And the overwhelming majority of them, I'm going to say like 95 plus percent when somebody writes something into the exit survey field, it is, oh I lost my job recently, or I'm struggling financially, sorry about that.

Starting point is 00:39:22 To which I say, get on your grind. Hustle! Get your podcast money up! You know? Put your grandma's furniture on Facebook Marketplace. And a very, very rare occasions. We're talking literally 12 months apart. Someone will give a different reason, and there was one and then when I looked the other day,

Starting point is 00:39:42 which was, it just got a bit gross. Which part? Yeah. It got like just now? I've gotten way grosser. Processing this in my head trying to think like I don't really what would the catalyst be for that? It's fun to think about isn't it we've not really like... I mean we are but this podcast is disgusting what? this is filth? this is filth Well, it's fun to think about, isn't it? We've not really like... I mean, we are. But... This podcast is disgusting. What? This is filth.

Starting point is 00:40:10 Everything ends up going back to filth somehow. When... Because it's a crutch. It's an easy comedic thing to fall back on. I feel like we delicately balance high brow and low brow in a way that kind of comes together. It comes together in a big toilet. Dick humiliation jokes, although... Yeah, well that's not gross. It's kind of hot actually. This comes to us from KUSA in Denver, Colorado.

Starting point is 00:40:38 KUSA. KUSA! KUSA latched onto... Oh yeah, sorry, I should have felt so good for getting that one. Yes, hey, has USA been taken yet? Because that's where we live. Yeah, that's us. We are America. Yeah, you can only hear this in Rhode Island. Healermonster latched on to own his hand, Animal Control report says. Okay. Yeah, we we all know what a heel monster is, right? Yeah, Google is a little moment processing to realize that that's a real thing and not like one of the antagonists in Gojira. Yeah, it's not an eldon ring monster.

Starting point is 00:41:18 It probably is an eldon ring monster as well as. It's a lizard that's like venomous as fuck. It's a lizard that's like venomous as fuck. It's saliva gets into your blood and they're whatever and it just fucks you. And people will keep these at home due to smartness? Due to America baby freedom. Yeah. No rules. It looks like it lives in a volcano. They look fucking great. They do have a kind of, they are dope. Godzilla-esque appearance to them a little bit to me. Just the the gnarledness. They look quite a lot like a shingleback lizard which we have over here except ours are not venomous. They're just friendly little guys. Yeah, we've just got friendly little guys. We did all the venom out. It's kind of like a little guy. Yeah. Not this one though.

Starting point is 00:42:03 The man who died over the weekend after being bitten by one of his pet healer monsters had an immediate reaction after the lizard latched onto his hand according to report from Lakewood animal control officers. He probably went. He probably go get. Yeah. Get out of it. Get out of it. Get out of it. Get out of it. Get out of it. Get out of it. Get out of it. Get out of it. Get out of it. Get out of it. Get out of it. Get out of it. Get out of it. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get out of it. Get out. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get out. Get. Get out. Get out. Get out of. Get out of. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out of. Get out of. Get out of. Get out of. Get out of. Get out of. Get out of. Get out of. Get out of. Get out of. Get out of. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get Oh, probably get. Go get. Go get. Go get out of it. It's just so good to yell. So good.

Starting point is 00:42:30 Rack off. How come Americans, uh... They've made the language tame. They don't even call a penis, a cock. They call it a pecker. I don't think they do that unilaterally, but pecker is a very funny thing. My damn pecker. My damn pecker, I gotta go to the doctor.

Starting point is 00:42:49 Get my pecker. I'm gonna lump on my pecker. Yolm, scat! As my hand turns black and starts to fall off. Why is the Wikipedia? Why is the Wikipedia article on? I'm the th. I th. I th. I then, th. then, th. tha, tho, tho, tho, tho, thu, thu, thu, tho, thu, thu, thu, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thu, I thu. I'm tho, I'm tho, I'm tho, I'm tho, I'm tho, I'm tho, I'm, I tho, I, I tho, I, I, I, I tho, I th. I, I th. I, I th. I th. I th. I th. I, I th. I th. I th. I tho, I tho, I tho, I'm, I'm tho, I'm tho, I'm tho, I'm thoom. thoom. thoomoomooomoomoomoomoooom. I'm thoooooooooooooom. I'm thoom. I'm tha. I'm tha. I'm simple Wikipedia. When the fuck did that happen? No, please. Give us the simple. Simple English one. That's good.

Starting point is 00:43:07 Okay, so venomous desert lizard. The Gila monster's name comes from the Gila River in Arizona, USA. The Gila monster is heavy and slow for a lizard. Well, look, we've all got issues. No one wants to be called out. No one wants to be put on blast on simple Wikipedia. Two feet long, its skin looks like beads and is black, pink, orange and yellow. Its skin does look like beads. It does.

Starting point is 00:43:32 There's a lot to like about this Wikipedia. It looks a lot like the Mexican bearded lizard, which is its closest relative. Oh, here we go. They don't get together much though. The Gila monster can bite quickly and hold on tightly, but it does not kill humans. Well, agree to disagree. Agreed to disagree. Simple English Wikipedia entry for Healamonstra.

Starting point is 00:43:53 And thank you, by the way, for hearing me, pronounce it. Yeah. And they choose you said it. Made up my own thing. The Jilla monster. Jila monster. That's right. The Jira monster. Am I right? Gailay.

Starting point is 00:44:12 I've never had to use Jira. What are you using? I am using Confluance though. Oh yeah. What confluence is that the document management thing that comes with Jira? Yeah, we don't have like a data driven approach. You don't track your tasks. I will think you are not doing estimates, sprint planning? Confluence is worse than Jura personally. You sprint planning because it's just me. I just look a really out to go what do I reckon

Starting point is 00:44:35 I get done this week? Louis hates confluence confluence confluence confluence confluence confluence confluence toxluence conf me if I start talking about agile. Confluence database is a bad too. Ruh. Can I apply use with a quote here? This is from Dr. Ward of Arizona Graphic, September 23, 1899. I have never been called to attend a case of Gila Gila Monster bite and I don't want to be. I think a man who is fool enough to get bitten by a Gila Monster ought to die.

Starting point is 00:45:12 Oh my goodness. The creature is so sluggish and slow of movement that the victim of its bite is compelled to help largely in order to get bitten. Hold it. Wow. compelled to help largely in order to get bitten. Holy fuck. Wow. The monster victims on blast. You are stupid. By Dr. Ward. That's beautiful.

Starting point is 00:45:33 And I mean this very sincerely. I'm not making fun of you in the slightest. That is the best accent work you have ever done on this podcast. That's wonderful. That's phenomenal. We really found your, um, Yeah, Arizona man. Well, I would say Arizona necessarily, but American for sure. Southern Bell, perhaps. Yeah, yeah. Antibelum, gent. Around 11.45 p.m. on February 12th, the man's girlfriend called 911 to report the bite. That is a very inconvenient time of day to have a-

Starting point is 00:46:07 Aheel monster bite. Yeah, you're just getting sleepy? You're starting to wind down for the day? You might have had your little sleepy time tea, had a little camomo. Oh my god, and that's made you so snoozy. Yeah, and then brick latches onto your hand. You've th You've been glumped by your gear. The moment happens.

Starting point is 00:46:27 You just like, well, that's my day. Fucked. I'm going to be a wreck tomorrow because I won't have got enough sleep because I would have survived this. Yeah, because the venom is not deadly, despite being the most painful produced by any vertebrate. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:46:42 Getting bitten bitten by the venom the venom the venom the venom the venom the venom the venom the venom the venom the venom the venom the venom the venom my big venomous lizard and then just opening my phone and going to the hot docks app and booking an appointment for three days from now. Yeah I'm probably gonna need that for my usual doctors. I don't want to call. I don't want to go. I've got the app. They've never pick up a phone. They never pick up phone. I've got the app. It's actually quicker this way. The victim, a 34-year-old man, it's a pretty regular guy. It's kind of the most normal age to be. Yeah. The victim, a 34-year-old man, was taken to the hospital and died several days later.

Starting point is 00:47:15 His cause of death is pending, according to the Jefferson County Coroner's office. It's probably the healer monster. The heal monster is probably the thing what got him in the end. Imagine being in the hospital three days knowing you're dying because you got bitten by a lizard. Yeah, yeah. You really start to just sort of look at your entire life. Yeah. I'd be like, oh, should I have done all those things? Should I have had that menagerie in my home? Yeah, should I have had that menagerie in my home? Yeah, should I have had that menagerie of deadly creatures? Specifically... That I had fed. I'm gonna give it the healer monster. Hey! Yeah, there we go. Okay. So my problem is I forget sounds very easily. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. And that's why we don't spend every

Starting point is 00:47:58 episode making fun of all of your mispronunciation. We wait for people to get in the discord comments and do it there as they're listening. Shut. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. S. S. S. S. the f. the f. the f. the f. the f. the f. the f. the f. the f. the f. the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that's that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the the. the the. the. the the. the. the. the. the the. the the. the. the. the. to get in the discord comments and do it there as they're listening along to the episode. Shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck. Shut up. That's for us to do. We choose when it's funny to make fun of Theo for mispronouncing something. Yeah. And it's never funny to make fun of me for getting my words in the wrong order because I got

Starting point is 00:48:17 too excited. Yes. Don't do. Yes. Yes. Yes. Don't do. Don't do. Yes. Don't do to do it. to do. to do. to do. to do. to do. to do. to do. to do. to do. to do. to do. to do. to to to to to to to to to to to to to do. to to to to that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. to that. to to to to to to. that. that. to. that. that. that. that. that. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. thoooooooooooo. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. We. that. so many words on this podcast. So many. How many words are you saying in a day? Huh? Probably no. 10. Yeah. Ultimate double whopper meal. Sprite. That's all you're saying.

Starting point is 00:48:33 That's all you say all day long. Good night, computer. Thank you so much for listening to the podcast. We love having you here. Especially for paying for it. The ten, 10. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Ten. Yeah. Yeah. Ten. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Ten. Yeah. Yeah. Ten. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Ten. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Ten. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, by the way we love having you here. The 10 words you are saying are ultimate double whop a meal and can I speak to the manager. Yeah, that's right. Not ultimate enough. This was a penultimate double whiom-eal. The animal control officer contacted the, oh sorry, here we go. The day after the bite, animal control in Colorado parks and wildlife officials responded to the home due to the venomous nature of the animal involved.

Starting point is 00:49:14 Yeah, he's a real bitch. He is toxic. Get rid of him. Seriously, get rid of him. I'm not saying that you should, uh, like, hammer throw a healer monster. I'm just saying that if the need arose, you could probably throw that sucker pretty far. Yeah, we're spelling hammer with a G. The animal control officer contacted the victim's girlfriend by phone while she was at the hospital.

Starting point is 00:49:48 She said the victim was, quote, on life support, according to the report. She reported that she did not know exactly what happened with the heelomonster because she was in another room and heard the victim say something that didn't sound right. Ow. Ah! Yeah, I've been bit bit me. Specifically by my poisonous lizard. Venomous, I think. Venomous, yeah, yeah. This fuck me out, right? Because like, you can get messed up by like getting bitten by a monitor lizard or something, but that's just because their teeth are all stanky.

Starting point is 00:50:21 Yeah, it's because they've got bacteria, right? They're dirty. Yeah, but it's guys. Whereas, He the hila mons to have th, like th, th, th, to have th, to have th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th th th th th th th th th thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, the thi, thi, the thi, thi, thi, thi, thin, thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo-poi, thoi, the thi, all stanky. Yeah, it's because they've got bacteria right. Yeah. They're dirty. Yeah, but these guys. Helemon monster have actual venom. Yeah, I have an venom and venom, yes. Yeah, a bite that's got venom in it. That's correct. They might also be poisonous. Like, can you eat a healer monster? Oh? Oh, no How's they eating? No, you can't have a beaded lizard or a healer monster. Yeah, stay away from those guys. Oh okay. But in a survival situation, and here's another sincere tip from Buntavista, if you absolutely must, you can eat a lizard a gecko and a chameleon. Yeah. I would never eat a chameleon. Or if you're hungry, you can toss that sucker 30, 40 feet. Yes, that's right. She then entered the room with the reptiles and saw one of the two healer monsters had,

Starting point is 00:51:17 quote, latched onto the victim's hand and said the victim immediately began exhibiting symptoms. Jesus. So they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're not they're not they're not they're not they're not they're not they're not they're not they're not they're not they're not they're not they're not they're not th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. I th. I th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I can can can can't that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. I'm thateeat. I'm thateat. I'm thoooooooooooooooooooooooooo. I could Oh Jesus. So they're not only like something that could bite you and put you in like enormous pain immediately, but they're just dickheads the whole thing, like they'll never grow to like you? Because I know people that have lizards, right? And they like, those lizards don't love you either. I mean, it's one way. I don't really don't want to get into the, like, which animals sincerely love you and which you, like you, like you, like you, like you, like you, like you, like you, like you, like you, like you, like you, like you, like you, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,'t really don't want to get into the, like, which animals sincerely love you and which ones don't? I think we can rule out lizards though, right? No, which, can any lizards love? Do they have love the food?

Starting point is 00:51:54 Do they have love their heart? I think they would exhibit the same signs of love towards you that anything that you fed would. But what's the difference? Do children really love? Do children love you? That's kind of what I, yeah. Or do they just depend on you. They just ask for food. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:52:13 Yes. Told by them, their own of them can talk at them only one of them can form the words I can't like you. In 2040 something I think yeah we reckon you die? Oh soon. No are you there I think you got a few good years left my body is just coming apart yeah saddest irony is a Theo like ending setting records, first person to live to like 125 or whatever. Yeah, his son's never found an excuse to listen to the podcast. Absolutely tragic.

Starting point is 00:52:54 What do you reckon, I mean, you guys all have kids in your life. They might be listening to it right now as well. When do you have a message for your future adult children? Yeah, I do. Waza! Your dad was loco! You just think of him as some dead old guy, but actually, he was a pretty cool thii thi to the tie.

Starting point is 00:53:20 They know I'm cool, they know I'm cool. I tell them all the time, I am cool. They're about to get to the age where they find out that you're not cool. That's true. How do you think you're cool? I know you're cool. But they're going to be like, oh dad. Come on. Again with their, with their. What, with th, with th, with th, with th, with th, with th, with th, I th, I, I, I, I, th, I, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, that, that, that, that, that, the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th. th. th. th. th th. th th th th. They their th. They th. They th. They th, th. They th. They th. They th. They th. They th. They th. They're th. They're th. They're the, they they're they're they're that, they're they're that, they're they're that, they're they're that, they're that, they're their that, their their the.'s fine, they meet other kids' dads and they go, oh. Oh, they got Chuggy dads. Yeah, those dads are super Chuggy. There's a lot of Chuggy dads out there. That's all I'm saying.

Starting point is 00:53:53 You have these really special moments where they look up at you when they grab your hand. They go, hey, dad,'d love to hear that. Yeah, but Chugi will well and truly have gone by the time they get to that point. No, I think it'll be back. Yeah, come back around. Like ironically. Better than ever. Not like now. People are saying it genuinely. Yes, where people are constantly saying it sincerely. That's right. It's not just us. It's not just us. It's not illegal. It's th. Everybody. Everybody. Everybody. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. the th. the the th. the the th. the the the the th. the the th. the th. the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. t. t. t. tru. true. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. true. to. true. truly. truly. truly. truly. truly. t told the woman that healer monsters are illegal in Lakewood. So that's like not illegal in Denver. Just Lakewood. Not illegal in Colorado. Not illegal in the US. Just Lakewood. And she asked to have both the reptiles removed as soon as possible. They were eventually transported to a facility in South Dakota. She told the animal control officer that the animal that had bitten the victim was named Winston. Winston, you bit.

Starting point is 00:54:52 You little cunt. Yeah, you would also die back you were bitten by Lucy's dog Winston. Yeah, you would know from the bacteria. As aforementioned. I think even if you just get too deep into his skin folds, you will probably pass away. If you just touch him, like, you're getting ill. How old is he, you reckon? 11 or 12? Oh my god, that is too old. It's too old. It's too old. He's a miracle dog. Every moment he lives his agony. He's creeping like an old staircase. Yeah. He said the ver, it was named Winston

Starting point is 00:55:28 and it had been purchased in Denver at erectile exhibition in October 2023. Did you say erectile exhibition? No, it sounded a lot like he said that. No, I did. I think he said that. Check the tape, that I had it and find out. I've never done overdubs or pickups before, but I could. That'd be great. I'm gonna do alternates of my lines but keep your guys as the same. A reptile, he's gonna read it as. It's gonna sound really weird too because it'll come before the part where people then question what it sounded like. Yeah, but you guys all sound crazy. The younger reptile is named Potato. It was purchased from an out-of-state breeder.

Starting point is 00:56:12 Yeah, that's cute. I mean, they do look potato-esque. Yeah. It was purchased from an out-of-state breeder in November as a hatchling. That guy shouldn't be doing that. Animal Control Officers also removed 26 spiders of different species from the residents. He's one of those guys. Ah he said lizard and spider guy. I just got a fucking text from Maddie that just says erectile. I'm fucking believing. Completely unrelated. What a strange coincidence. According to Colorado Parks and Wildlife, Heal monsters are illegal to own as pets in hatching hatching hens tho thoe tho Completely unrelated. What a strange coincidence. According to Colorado Parks and Wildlife, Helemonsters are illegal to own as pets in Colorado,

Starting point is 00:56:50 but the agency does issue permits for zoological facilities. Oh, so the permits can't just be like for your house. No, it has to be a zoo. But your house can be a zoo. Your house can be a zoo. Yeah. Welcome to... You just house can be a zoo. Yeah. You just kind of say it is. Yeah, it's the Lakewood roadside zoo.

Starting point is 00:57:10 Wink! It's my fucking apartment. The third floor. Six spiders in it. Yeah. Uh, having 26 spiders and two illegal, Two illegal healer monsters, Well, that's fun to say, uh, in your house is apparently a crime. And we look at those in Crime Watch.

Starting point is 00:57:29 Please put down your weapon. You are a direct violation of the Code 1369. You now have five seconds to... Help! Help me! Help me! I'm not in the flower, in Florida. Thousands of nitrous oxide canisters found in Florida neighborhood. What could he happen here?

Starting point is 00:58:32 Been ice in a lot of cupcakes. That's right, yeah. The first time he noticed a shiny metallic container about the size of his pinky finger on the ground outside his Florida neighborhood, Paul, howk, had no idea what he was looking at. How big is this man's pinkies? Big old fat pinkies. Man's got that Prince Charles syndrome. I just thought this is a new dimension of littering, Halk recalled, I've never seen it before. Man doesn't know how to party. I also don't, I think that's still regular littering, just like chucking rubbish on the ground. Yeah, like you're still littering. Yeah, that's not an added dimension there.

Starting point is 00:59:13 It's pretty squarely falls in the dictionary definition of littering, I think. That was about two years ago. In the time since, Halk said he's picked up over 2,000 nitrous oxide canisters mostly around his neighborhood, located near the boundary of Hillsborough and Pinellas counties? That's so many, panace. That is a lot to keep track of. Are you counting those things? Yeah. What are we, what are we got? Oh, that's only 83 a month. So you have one, you and your buddies have one big night a month, you know? It's not one person doing them all, probably. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:59:55 Like everyone else, I thought they were CO2 cartridges, Hauc said, I've since learned that it's nitrous oxide and it's sold commercially for the purpose of making whipped cream Says the world's simplest man Just came up out of the like sealed vault he was in like that Brendan Fraser movie We got to we got to hook this guy up with the person who's getting the answer about worldliness. Yes. Yeah, see if you guys should do a little knowledge sharing together, you know? Yeah, except the other one would be too shy.

Starting point is 01:00:32 That's why the canisters are also known as whippets. According to the Cleveland Clinic, the gas inside can be inhaled to produce a high, which can be harmful. You all say it harms you because you want to do so any of them. Never done it. It is very undignified to do Nangs as an adult. Yeah, I think is that fair to say. I think it's fair to say also if you do enough of them they don't work no good no more. Yeah. Do they like damage your brain permanently? Yeah, what are they... They've done a lot of they. they. they. they. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It th. It th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's thi. It's they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's theeee. It's thi. It's theeat. thi. thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's the. It's Do they like damage your brain permanently? Yeah, what are they... Somebody's done a lot of them, I believe it does, yes.

Starting point is 01:01:09 They can like starve your brain of oxygen or some shit, right? No, I'm starving myself of oxygen while it's happening. Yeah. I've got to say, you, because you, you huck one in there real good and then you hold your breath until you think you're dying. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. That is the best way to do that.

Starting point is 01:01:30 Kids, I love you. He died doing one last nang. One last giant nang. One day I picked up 150. Nang. What loves giant Nang? One day I picked up 150, Howk explained. Two days later I picked up 200 more. Okay, this guy is definitely, he's a wailzer, I can't believe he's talking to the news, but at the same time, that's like a lot.

Starting point is 01:01:59 It's so many. It's a fair number. But you're spending your time picking them up, like that's some labor you're doing there, picking up 200 Nang canisters. What if he's actually just trying to throw people off the trail? Because he's Mr. Nang's George. I found another 200, you know? Oh, where they come from? Who could say?

Starting point is 01:02:24 Yeah. Crazy. Standing around the streets. I can't believe more of these have turned up in my neighborhood. Someone else in this neighborhood is having an amazing time doing just hundreds of Nangs every day. Wow, someone in, I can't believe, it grosses me out that someone in my neighborhood is going to the tin room every night, you know. I'm just sitting here seething, thinking. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th, I th, I th, I th, I thi, I thi, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I can't thi, I can't thi, I can't thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, I can't th it grosses me out that someone in my neighborhood is going to the tin room every night, you know. I'm just sitting here seething, thinking about how someone who lives near me probably is spending all day, every day doing Nangs and playing Need for Speed Underground to. Oh, it's sickens

Starting point is 01:02:59 me. Oh, someone out here is just, oh, they're sucking these down and listening to Electro House. Oh, it's gross to think about. Oh, oh, it. Oh, it. It's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. It's th. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thin' thin' thin' thin' to thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' th. I's, I's, I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. th. th. th. th. thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin. te. te. te teat teat teat teat teat. teat thin. thin. thin. thin. thin' thin' thin, they're sucking these down and listening to Electro House. Oh, it's gross to think about. Someone got the vinyl releases of the wipeout soundtrack from the video game Wipout. And they've been listening to that constantly and doing nags. Someone ought to do, there ought to be a law. There ought to be a law. Somebody's to clean this up. Uh, the Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office said it's contacting its environmental enforcement unit about the issue to see if they can also do nothing about it.

Starting point is 01:03:35 Neighbors still have no idea how the containers ended up in the road and along the sidewalks. Mr. Nangs. That's how. Quote, they all had their theories, Huk said. You know, it had to be, it. It the, it. It to be, it. It had to be, it had to be. It had the, it had the, it had to be. It had to be. It had to be. It had to be. It had to be, it had to be. It had to be, it. It had to be, it. It to be, it. It to be. It to be, it. It to be to be to be to be to be. It to be. It their, it. It their, it. It their, it. It the sidewalks. Mr. Nangs, that's how. Quote, they all had their theories, Halk said. You know, it had to be a golf cart, it had to be a kid, it had to be someone or this one or that one. But we don't know. None of us know specifically whose house this is happening in, and it's a mystery. It could be literally anyone. Except me, the guy cleaning it up. It definitely isn't me the guy who's making the biggest deal about it. That's for sure. Why would I do that? Why would I draw attention to myself if I was the one who fucking loved sucking these things down. I think he's just fucking exaggerating.

Starting point is 01:04:21 That's what I think. Oh, I found 2000,000. Yeah, you know, he didn't. Yeah, you know, like sometimes you realize when you're like, you've started telling someone, in like a social setting, you've started telling them an anecdote, and you've gotten like two sentences into it, and you realize it's actually not that interesting or funny. Yeah. And you got to beef it up the the the the thief it up to beef it up beef it up beef it up beef it up beef it up beef it up beef it up to beef it up beef it up to beef it up to beef it up to beef it up to beef it up to beef it up to to to to to to to to to to to to that thief it up to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. the the the the the the te the te tell the the the the the the to to to to to to to to to to to started talking to the news and you've been like, I had to pick up 10 spent, I had to pick up 2,000 Nangs. I mean, I don't know what they're called. I've never seen these before, but I had to pick up 10,000 of them. You keep saying numbers and like you're, you just keep saying them until the expression

Starting point is 01:05:02 on their face changes. Yeah. Five? Two hundred, and they're still looking at their phone. 200,000 and then they look up. Okay, 200, yes, 200,000. Yes. It's not me. That's the main thing.

Starting point is 01:05:21 It's not me. Halc also said he worries about the danger of the cartridges. The tire shop across the street from his neighborhood, told Nextars, WFLA, a vehicle came in with a canister in its tire once. And cars have had to swerve to avoid the whippets in the morning. How many fucking Nangs are people doing here? What's going on? Yeah, you live tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tho tho tho tho thi tho tho the thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu tho tho- tho- tho- tho-a thus tho-a' tho-a' tho-a' tho-a tho-a tho-a the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tho-a th It just looks like there's been a big hailstorm, but all the bits of ice were

Starting point is 01:05:48 Nang canisters. Also, it happened one time. Yeah. Like, I mean, that's not great. But it would be a more interesting news story to me and a bigger problem if they were like, yeah, once every month someone comes in and their tire's been punctured by a whippet cartridge. Yeah. I don't believe that either that a tire, that a whipter canister went through a tire. They're two round. If it's propped up on something else, maybe the front bar could. Yeah, I don't know. Put them in the bin. Put them in the, I assume they're recyclable. Probably not. I don't think anything is recyclable.

Starting point is 01:06:30 I think I've just found out that like the only thing that's recyclable is like two types of glass and then nothing, oh, cardboard paper obviously. Nothing else. Everything else. I got something the other day from the coals or woolies or whatever and it still had a thing on the back being like, you can recycle this at our red cycle facility. Yeah. No, I can't.

Starting point is 01:06:54 No, I absolutely can't. And we found that out quite a while ago. Yeah. I don't like thinking about it either. No, there's an article kicking around at the moment. I keep seeing people share about how a lot of the people that use plastics for packaging or just straight applying about whether or not they were recyclable. And I've not clicked on it because I know how sad it's going to make me. Oh, I saw like some environmental activists that I follow online posting a poll where they ask people like what is what is the most what's the most effective thing

Starting point is 01:07:30 you can do about mitigating climate change and stuff and it was all you know questions like get an EV or put solar on your house or all these various things and ranked number two overall in people's responses was do recycling and and yeah I just saw these these climate activists talking about him going This is really bad that people still think that it's doing anything. Yeah You can recycle things yourself like you can use a jar to make pickles. Yeah. Oh man keep all your jars do that. Yeah, I try it out a I try it out a little pickle hack the other week, which is when you, when you're the you've the the the the the the the the th, th, the th, the the the th, the th, the the th, th, th, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th, they the climate, the thi, thi, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the climate, the climate, the climate the climate the climate the climate the climate the climate the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they they they they they c climate, things things things things things things things things things things things things are, thi thi thi thi. they they they that, all your jars, do that. Yeah. I tried out a little pickle hack the other week, which is when you've eaten all the pickles out of the jar and it's still got the brine in it, you just cut up some, you cut up your onions or whatever and chuck them in there and put the lid back on and then you put it in a pot of water on the stove and keep it on the boil for like 15 minutes, I think you take it out and you got yourself some more brine pickles.

Starting point is 01:08:27 You can just keep it going forever. Are you storing those in the fridge after you've done that? Yeah. I mean, personally I'm not doing any like, I'm not doing the triserving stuff. I'm not trying to jarish it and keep it in the cupboard forever. You can just the boiling thoililililililil skip the boiling step if you're only doing fridge pickles. The boiling's really only if you're doing lacto fermentation. You can just go straight into the fridge. I'm not sure you've even got to boil stuff for lacto fermentation.

Starting point is 01:08:53 I mean, you should. Just because that's to just make sure there's nothing that's still in the jar or whatever. And that's more medical advice from the podcast. Wunderbister. Just eat it fast. Just eat it fast. That's right. If they're tasty enough, you'll eat them all that week anyway. It's fine. And if they're not, you're not going to eat him if you don't like them.

Starting point is 01:09:13 You know, throw them out. Yes. Yes. Yes. Haukes said. tear the canisters apart. And he's concerned a machine will split a canister out at someone in the future. Like the, I assume, like the vending machine from the movie Maximum Overdrive. That's exactly what I was picturing. Yeah, shoots a bunch of cans at a little league coach, hits him in the nuts and then kills him. What are the odds that all three people on this

Starting point is 01:09:42 have watched maximum overdrive? One of our Stephen King's rare directing efforts. Sorry, I say all three because Theo left. I don't know if you the list of noticed. He had a lunch date to go to which meant that he had to leave at 10. I just realized that. I was like, isn't it 10 o'clock? Yeah. It doesn't really fucke an add up, does it? Doesn't add up. Yeah. Nangs. That's my biggest concern and that's why I pick these up, Halk said. It's not because I'm just tipping them all straight into a garbage bag in my own house and then bringing them outside and saying, I pick these all up from the neighborhood, I'd do it for safety reasons.

Starting point is 01:10:33 Yes. I don't want to see anybody hurt because of someone else's, not mine, someone else's negligence. The Panella's County Sheriff's Office told WFLA it can be difficult to prosecute cases like this since it's small amounts of litter over a long period of time and there's no direct evidence of someone dumping the canisters. Yeah, that's right. You don't know if it's just a guy filling up a shopping bag and then claiming to have picked them all up. That's simply one man saying, hey I found these all. Yeah, it's Mr. Nang's word against yours.

Starting point is 01:11:10 There's this thing that I'm sort of, I'm keeping an eye on for a potential phenomenon watch maybe in the future. I keep seeing things sort of pop up about people running over disposable vapes and it exploding, and they're shooting out a small projectile which has happened a couple of times like there's a bigger problem with them starting bin fires all the time because people just throw them straight into the rubbish and then they start fires in bins and in landfill because they have little batteries in them obviously. Yeah but so did cigarettes when people would throw them into bins.

Starting point is 01:11:46 So it's exactly the same. Yes. All right, back to smoking. Yeah. Yeah. That's just something to keep an eye on. Something that, I don't know. It seems weird that little explosions are happening sometimes and they're maybe firing bits of the furass. tip th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tha th. tha. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. So, thi. So, thi. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It's. It's. It's. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It your eyeball. Yeah, pro tip, if it has a rechargeable battery in it, don't throw it in the landfill. Yeah, please, for the love of God, if you're a vape addicted, let's not just sing-loud

Starting point is 01:12:15 zoom, is anyone, lie I know a lot of millennial vapors. Oh yeah, yeah. Don't be throwing that shit into the bin, you fucker. And don't, none th th th th th th th th tho, none none none th tho, none tho, no, no, no, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thu, thu, thu, thu, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, throw, thi, throw, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, throw, throw, throw, throw, throw, throw, throw, throw, throw, throw, throw, throw, throw, thin, thin, thin, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thin, thin, tho, thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, tho of those single use shit get one of those, if you have to vape, if you absolutely must, get one of the top-upable ones with the oil and whatever you put in there. Yeah, I only learned recently that those things are like single-use. Yeah. Are you fucking kidding? Man, this is, I'm such a fucking old man about this now, but there is a shop like two or three spots up from the bar that just sells those like illegal single-use vapes. And people, because we're on a relatively main road, you can't really park anywhere near it, but people just illegally park out the front run and buy vapes and then fuck up the traffic for the whole road. And they do this every day and it's making me crazy because it's a combination of all the things I don't like.

Starting point is 01:13:06 And now they're throwing them all into the bin out of the front of the bar, they just chuck them on the road. You people, disgust me. Put down the vape. Put down the vape. That shop also sells. Smok a goddamn. Shop also sells illegal cigarettes, like super cheap illegal Chinese cigarettes that costs like nothing. Buy a pack of fucking cigarettes.

Starting point is 01:13:27 Okay? I'm sick of your goddamn vapes and what they're doing to society. This is my genuine opinion. Yeah, by the way. I sincerely believe this. Put down the vake, pick up a cigarette. If you have to do one of them, cigarettes, please. Christ. You won't have to go to the shop every fucking day.

Starting point is 01:13:45 Well, maybe you will, if you smoke enough of them. Buy a bunch of them all you're there. I'm sick of this shit. Fuck you, society. Makes me furious. It makes me so mad. I genuinely wonder how many people would be better off with cigarettes just because it reduces the amount of time you can be smoking. Oh, my God, I'm in a constant constant, if th. If th. th. th th th th th th th th thue thue thue thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi them, thi thi, if them. them. them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them. But, but them. I them. I them. I them. I them. I them. I them. I them them. I them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the, the, the, to to to the, to to the, the, the, the, the, the the, but the, but them them. them. it reduces the amount of time you can be smoking?

Starting point is 01:14:06 My God, I'm in a constant argument with, not an actual argument, but an argument because I care, but with someone that works at the bar because he just vapes constantly and I'm like, and he's like, oh thank God I don't smoke anymore, I'm like, mother fucker, you vape a thousand times more than you ever smoked. like this is definitely thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi thi, thi, the the the thoomoomoom- thoom- thoom-a tho-a, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the the the theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeean, thean, thean, thean, theeeeeeeeeee the thousand times more than you ever smoked. Like this is definitely way worse. It's a very, very, very regular thing that I've seen and heard is people saying, yes, I vape, like, I used to smoke cigarettes, now I vape, I vape 50 times more than I've smoked. And it's worse because I could do it inside my apartment, I can do it in bed, I could do it fucking everything.

Starting point is 01:14:48 It's the worst. People just get even slightly drunk and will start unconsciously vaping at the bar as well where they're just like, they just sort of pull it out of their pocket, slowly lifted up to their mouth and when you're like, hey you can't vape here, they're like, oh, I didn't realize. You like, you fucker. You can't do that with a cigarette. I didn't even know I was vaping. Yeah. I had two beers, I didn't know I was vaping. I had someone do that to be the other day where they like just started vaping out the front.

Starting point is 01:15:17 I was like, hey, the law has been like that for like 20 years now. It's just been like forever and he's like, well, you gotta try once. Like, you don't. Please don't try once at every venue you go to because I'm fucking sick of telling people this. Oh, I think, I do think that it's a very shitty attitude to be like, hey, I'll just do this thing and see if anybody cares to stop me. Yeah. You know, because so much of the time people are doing things where it's like, you're

Starting point is 01:15:49 making the person who works at the bar or the movie theater or the wherever who doesn't want to be doing it. I don't want to be doing this. I don't want to be coming over to you and saying, hey, you're not allowed. No one wants to be the person who's saying you're not allowed to do that. You can bring food into the movie theaters, though. I don't know why people think you can't do this. Even if they have a policy of not letting you do it, no one's checking your bag. No one's gonna come to you in the middle of the film's a beekeeper and ask to see what's in your bag..... the movie.. the movie. the movie. the movie. the the the the the the thea, thief, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the, theat's, theateat, theat, theat, theat, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi's thi's thi's thiiiiiiiiiiiii's thiiiiiiiii's thi's thi, ththe movie theaters will serve you hot food now.

Starting point is 01:16:25 Yeah, you get a pizza. Lizzie, what do you think of the beekeeper? Oh my god, that's one of the best movies I've ever seen in my life. It was so good. I was laughing. I was hooting and hollering. I was having a giggle. Ben, it is from the director of Mark Wahlberg's shooter. Oh, I sold Maddie on it last night.

Starting point is 01:16:46 Well, I think I may be sold Maddy on it, but just from seeing you posting about watching it in our group chat, I was like Mads. We have got to watch the beekeeper. He's keeping them bees and he fucking loves them. He loves the bees. He wants to protect the hive. Protect the hive. He's taken down the cl cl the cl the cl the cl cl cl the cl, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's the ba, he's the bees, he's the bees, he's, he's the bees, he's, he's the bees, he's the bee, he's, he's, he's, the bee, the bee, the bee, the bee, the bee, the bee, the bee, the bee, the bee, the bee, the bee, the bee, the bee. He, the bee. He, the bee, the bee. He, he's, the bee. He, he's, the bee. He, the bees, the bees, the bees, the bees, the bees, the bees, the bees, the bees, the bees, the the the, thease, thease, thease, thease, theaseease, theaseease, thease, theaseease, thease, thease, thease, the hive. He's taken down the Clinton crime family. Yeah. You know, he's doing it all. He's doing it all. I like how the whole plot is just that our society doesn't care about old people too.

Starting point is 01:17:12 Yeah. It's kind of like the underlying message. I think maybe one of my favorite line in the movie is at the start where he says, at the start where he says to the lady cop, stealing from an elderly person is as bad as stealing from a child, or maybe worse. Because a child has parents to take care of them or something. Yeah, who takes care of the elderly. I really enjoyed, because Antoine Fouqua also made all of the

Starting point is 01:17:46 equalizer movies with Denzel Washington and I really enjoyed how much more explicit it becomes over the course of those three movies that the director's position is basically that like Denzel Washington's character is a like a biblically empowered enforcer of right and wrong, you know, that he gets to do judicial, extrajudicial killings and everything because he's just morally, he's morally just, and the criminals aren't, and so he can do whatever. And he's really carried that through into the beekeeper, where he's just like, no, no, no.

Starting point is 01:18:22 I thoughtthe beekeeper was directed by somebody else. By who? I looked it up last night. I saw, I saw it was the guy that directed suicide squad. David Ayer? Yeah. That's what I'm saying. Oh no, people have, if you've already written in, saying that anybody's wrong. Oh no, don't ever tell us that anybody's wrong. We will get you... We will find it, I think, I I I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, th, th, th, th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to thi, to to thi, thi, to to to thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th th thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thiiiiiiiiiiiiii. thiiiiiii. thi. thi. thi, thi,, don't ever tell us that anyone is wrong. We will get you. We will find it, I think. Oh, even funnier then if it's David A. R. I think it is. Suicide Squad. It's David A. R. Training Day. I can't believe you lied to me about it being Anton Fuqua. So trick me into watching it because of how much I love shooter. He did a fury. He did fury. He did, he did, he did, he did, he did, he did, he did, he did, he did, he did, he did, he the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. He did, he did, he did, he did, he did, he did, he did, he did, he th. He th. He's th. He th. He, he th. He, he th. He, he th. He, he th. He, he, he, he, he, he th. He, he, he th. He, he. He, he. He, he. He, he. He, he. He, he. He, he. He, he. He, he. He, he. He, he. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. the. thi. th. the. th. th. He, the insanely violent, yeah Brad Pitt one. That's good shit. That's good shit. Oh, and to watch the cop movie with Jake Jilinhal. This guy loves cops.

Starting point is 01:19:13 And it's written by Kurt Wimmer who directed Equilibrium. Oh my god. Yeah, which I only learned yesterday because I started, uh, friend of the show, my friend Al put me onto a Spotify account that just posted DVD comment a friend of the show, my friend Al, put me onto a Spotify account that just posted DVD commentaries like their podcast episodes. Nice. Just from a random selection of movies and I am having a fucking blast. But yeah, the equilibrium one popped up and I was like, I don't think I'd need

Starting point is 01:19:39 that. I hadn't thought about that film in 20 years. I would love to hear what the director is saying when they get up to to to to to to to the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just post, I'd just post, I'd just post, I'd just post, I post, I post, I post, I post, I post, I post, I post, I post, I post, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'm thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thito hear what the director is saying when they get up to the part where it reveals that they have samurai swords. That's going to be very good. Now I thought this would be really cool. Yeah, I thought this would look dope. We have definitely, I think, maybe hit the runtime that we needed for this episode. Hey, thank you so, did we finish that article? Yeah, we did.

Starting point is 01:20:08 Yeah, yeah, it's all good enough. It was him, it was him. It was Mr. Nags. Thank you so much for joining us. There is one more episode to come for Freibribery. Even though, oh no, because it's a leap year. Yeah. How about that? even though, oh no, because it's a leap year, yeah. How about that?

Starting point is 01:20:27 Because it's the 29th on the Thursday, which is when the episode usually comes out. So does that mean there will be another? How special? Yeah, one more. Yeah. And if you are enjoying it, consider signing up. And if you're not, just don't change. Don't fucking do anything. Do what you do it. Keep on vaping th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th that, because that, because that, because that. Because, because that, because thate. Because that. Because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because th. Because th. Because th. Because thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. Because thi. Because thi. Because thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thiiaa. thiaua' thia' thia' thia' thia. Because it's thi. Because it's 't change. Don't fucking do anything.

Starting point is 01:20:46 Just doing what you're doing. Keep on vaping at bars until you're told off, wait half an hour, start vaping again. Act surprise when you're told off, and then when the otherwise very lovely bartender confiscates your drinks, get mad at him. Yeah. Oh, why? Why? Why are you doing that? I was just vaping. Yeah. Hey. Yeah. Yeah. Classic vape brain as well. That's how they talk. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. that's. Yeah. that's a try. that. that. the try. to the bonus episode. Have a lovely rest of your day or night. Stay safe out there. Start smoking cigarettes. Yeah. Yes. Yes. thi. You can th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thin. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. Cl. Cl. Cl. Cl. Cl. Cl. Cl. Cl. Cl. Cl. Cl. Cl. Cla. Cla. Cla. Cla. Cla. Cla. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. th. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. day or night. Stay safe out there. Start smoking cigarettes.

Starting point is 01:21:28 You can get illegal black market imported ones and they don't cost anything and none of the taxes go to anything. So you don't have to worry about like supporting anything. Yeah. So they're cheap. Yeah. None of the taxes will go to hospitals that will help people who have developed vape lung. Yeah, there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's th's th's thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus. thus. thus. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. Yes. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. You thi. You thi. You thi. You th. You th. You thi. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the to to to to to thoooooo to toooo toe the toa the thoo tho the the the the thi go to hospitals that will help people who have developed a vape lung. Yeah, there's probably asbestos in the filters as well.

Starting point is 01:21:49 Which means they're fireproof. You won't burn your lips. All right, bye. Bye. Bye. the

Boonta Vista - EPISODE 335: Gammer Throw Your Gila Monster

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.